#we had character sheets and a storyline and everything- eventually we wanted to make a silly comic about it !

[eryanlainfa]

I think this is one of my favorite work ever but for some reason I never posted it ??? We had to make 4 illustrations based on a song without lyrics, and I thought it'd be really cool to connect them to make one big piece!

Featuring 3 of my past teachers as adventurers. As I have the fun habit of making everyone a DnD counterpart haha

[allywritesforfun]

{Confessions} Karl Jacobs x Reader

summary: your favorite director came out with a new movie so Karl invites you over to watch it with him

pronouns: not mentioned

word count: 1910

masterlist

You and Karl have been pretty good friends ever since you moved into the neighborhood. He was one of the first people to welcome you in. You moved from your hometown to find more excitement in your life, and boy did Karl give you the excitement you always wished for.

At first, it was simple gestures of friendship. You baked cookies one day for yourself and had some left over that you packaged up and gave to Karl. You even took the risk of adding your phone number to the basket. To your surprise, he actually called that night to thank you.

Those calls became weekly, to daily, to no calls at all. Instead, you simply went over to his house. You two did easy little things, your favorite was making “neighbor bracelets” which Karl renamed as best friend bracelets. Both of you still wore yours today.

You’ve built a very good relationship with Karl, you both trusted each other with your lives. Both of you had the other's spare key just in case. The neighborhood wasn't sketchy, but life is life and the two of you were prepared to drop everything to help each other out.

Tonight was a special night. You and Karl were super excited about a new movie coming out of Netflix. Karl knew how much you loved the director, so he invited you over. You were ecstatic.

You offered to bring pizza since Karl provided the drinks. After you picked up the pizza, you headed straight to his house. You parked behind his car and welcomed yourself in, you two basically lived together at this point.

“Karl!” You called, “I have the pizza! Where we watching this?”

You heard a voice from downstairs, “I set up the basement to look like a screening room!”

You chuckled to yourself, that was such a Karl thing to do. Karl always went all out on everything he did. That was one thing you admire about him: he always lived his life to the fullest.

You stopped at the kitchen first to drop off your keys and your shoes and picked up some extra napkins, you weren’t the neatest eater.

You made your way carefully down the stairs, step by step. You had a history of being a bit clumsy and may or may not have dropped pasta down the stairs before.

You turned the corner to the right and stopped immediately. The room was beautiful, with an even more beautiful sight in the middle.

Karl really did surprise you this time. When he said he made it look like a ‘screening room’ you thought maybe some aisle lights and very original signs, but no.

The room was completely transformed. Everywhere you looked, you found something new. The first thing you noticed was the amazing set up around the couch. Karl moved the couch to the middle of the room in front of the projector. Above the couch draped satin sheets that made the set up look like it was from a fairy tale. At first you didn't notice the fairy lights spread out on top of the sheet, but it made the perfect touch. Next was a line of squishmallows leading up to the couch. You even laughed at the little outfits Karl put on them to make them look like workers. You followed where the little workers directed, which lead you straight to Karl.

“Surprise!” He jumped, arms wide open.

You set the pizza down on the coffee table in front of the couch. You took another look around and noticed the abundance of blankets that Karl had laid over to the couch to look really cute and really comfortable.

“Karl,” You covered your mouth in awe, “It's just a movie, you didn't need to do all of this!”

He grabbed your sweatshirt and pulled in for a hug, “But I wanted to! You were so excited for this movie and if it ends up being trash then I wanted to make sure there was at least something good about it!”

You put your arms over Karl’s shoulders and leaned into the hug. You always felt safe in his hugs. His hugs were unmatched. They always drained all of the negative energy out and replaced them with safe and secure vibes.

Karl waddled you two over to the couch and he gently set you down. He stayed up and grabbed the remote while you got the pizza ready.

“This was so sweet of you to do,” You told him. “Thank you very much. I think this might be one of my favorite nights with you.”

“That’s good to know, I’ll make sure I do this more often,” Karl laughed, causing you to blush.

You enjoyed every day with Karl and treasured your friendship to the point when you weren't aware of your own feelings for him. You wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of your life with him, but you wouldn't let yourself think in a romantic way. You feared losing due to unlevel feelings. Karl knew so many people around, so why would he pick the new person in town?

You buried your feelings so far down that you blamed your blushing on going down the stairs and getting overheated from it… because that makes total sense. Karl sat down next to you, about a forearm's length away.

“What type of pizza did you get?” Karl asked.

“I wasn't too sure on what I wanted myself, so I got half pepperoni and half sausage,” You answered.

“Oh good! I was feeling both today too, in sync aren't we?” Karl questioned.

You shook your head, “No, you’re obviously way ahead of me!” You made gestures around the room, “I would've never thought of something this beautiful!”

“Not as beautiful as you,” Karl said under his breath.

You heard it loud and clear. Karl gave you these compliments every once and while. But again, you pushed it off to the side and rationalized it by saying that he says it to everyone. You weren’t special or some sort of exception. What you didn't know was that you were the only one that Karl called beautiful. All of his other friends he called ‘pretty’, beautiful was just for you.

Karl started the movie and the opening seemed off. This wasn't the typical comedy that the director normally did, this was a horror movie. You shifted around in your seat.

“Are you alright?” Karl asked.

You nodded, “Yeah, I just assumed it would be a comedy.” It's not that you hated horror, you in fact enjoyed the storyline of most of them over any other category. It was the jump scares and suspense that you hated.

“Did you not watch the trailer? It was pretty obvious by the dark mysterious basement that it was a horror thriller.”

“No I didn't,” You admitted. “It's alright though. I'm sure the director made it one of the better movies.” “Oh my gosh,” Karl turned and made eye contact with you, “You’re scared aren't you?”

You almost forgot to reply by the eye contact. Karl had the best eyes that you’ve seen. They were so vibrant and you always got lost in them, no matter how hard you tried not to, “Pffft. Me? Scared? Nope, never. It's just a fictional movie that happens to have events that could very well happen tonight or at any point in someone’s life.”

“What the honk?” Karl asked. “You are scared! I can already see it in your eyes and movement that you're scared. Here,” He offered his hand, “Take my hand and you can squeeze it when you get scared.”

You gladly took his hand and refocused your attention back on the movie. It was off to an alright start. You could already tell who was going to die and what character would be your favorite. You didn't jump until a door loudly shut in the movie. You slightly yelped and squeezed Karl’s hand.

He laughed and squeezed back, “That made you scared? You’re in for a long movie.”

You shook your head, “It was a loud noise! How did you not jump?”

“I wasn't really paying attention I guess,” Karl admitted. “Your hand is just so soft and I was trying to think about what lotion you use.”

“Oh, I think I put some Bath and Body Works on them before I left. I took a shower and they got pretty dried out.” You were obviously very unaware of Karl trying to flirt with you. This became a regular thing. It was surprising how much Karl was into you. You accidentally rejected him almost every day, yet he never let up.

The movie progressed and got scarier with every scene. The plot really developed and you loved it. You were so caught up in the movie that you didn't even realize that you were laying down in Karl’s arms.

“Are you okay with this?” Karl whispered into your ear.

You didn't realize that he had his hand on your waist, resting on some exposed skin, you nodded back at him, “Yeah, of course.”

You saw Karl’s cheek turn to a dark red hue despite the darkness of the room. You smiled to yourself and leaned more into him, with the excuse, of course, that you thought there was going to be a jump scare.

Karl’s free hand danced his way around to meet yours, which he nonchalantly took. It was a perfect moment for the two of you, even though neither of you knew about your feelings for each other. This was your first time cuddling with him. You absolutely loved it. You loved the fact that you didn't even have to ask, it kinda just naturally happened.

The movie ended and you two stayed in the same position for a while. You talked about the movie which eventually led to telling stories. You let Karl do most of the talking, you enjoyed watching his eyes light up when he told you about his childhood. The only time Karl’s hand left yours was to either fix his hair, or give you head pats.

Both of you ran out of things to say and laid there in comfortable silence. Karl moved his hand up and rubbed your arm for a while, which made you pretty sleepy. You yawned and snuggled into Karl more than you already were.

You felt him lean down and kiss the top of your head, “Y-You know I really like you right?” He asked.

You nodded, “Yeah I would hope so, I’m here like almost every day.”

“No, I mean like- god this sounds childish but I like you, like you,” He confessed. “Like I invite you over all the time and want to hang out as much as I can because you bring me so much happiness and joy. Like, I’m falling really hard for you and I don't think that you picked up on it.”

You sat up in his arms and stared at him, “You’re joking right? Because you’re the only person that I’ve wanted to be with since I moved, but I didn’t think that I had a chance because you’re so sweet and kind, and you know all of these people so I just kind of ignored my feelings because I didn't want to lose what we already have.”

Karl cupped your cheek with his hand, “y/n, you’re the only one that's had a chance.”

[malethirsty]

Californication: Reloaded [Hank Moody]

W•ho•re

Summary: With Becca off at band practice, it gives you & Hank time to work on your new task: Fucking in every room of his house.

Warnings: M/M smut (21+), Bareback (Wrap Before You Tap!), Watersports

It takes two weeks to break a habit, but in the case of you & Hank, two fucks was enough to seal the deal. Ever since then, the two of you fucked every single day. Even having one eventuful day on the lounge where you caught him watching the porn the first day you met, where you squirted a massive load over the both of you “Fuck you squirt better than every woman I’ve fucked.” Hank moaned, quicjly shooting his load inside your ass before rushing to get toilet paper to clean up the lounge.

The entire house was nearly covered, you had only one room left to fuck in: Hank’s Room. You had a realised roleplay storyline out, you would be a Sex Ed student who’d be getting a practical demonstration from Hank, and you were eagerly excited to perform it with him. “Damn, you’ve really thought this whole thing out haven’t you.” “Yeah, it’s a far step from where I was a while ago, all cooped up in my room, depressed and shit.” Hank let a smirk cross his face as he leant in for a kiss, before ducking out of your room “Dinner will be on in 30 guys.” “Sure” you & Becca yelled out. Becca & Karen still did not know, and with your friendship together and Hank’s divorce pending, you wanted it to stay that way.

The next morning came, and with it, the special day. You knew Becca was heading out for band practice, so you waited for the garage door to open and the car to drive off. It felt like hours passed by as you used your phone for remedial things like binging shows and you were midway through RuPaul’s Drag Race before finally you heard the garage door opening. You took out your headphones as Becca’s car reversed back and waited until the sounds of it had faded into the street before you rushed to your wardrobe, picking out the sluttiest clothes you could find, settling for a low cut V neck and tight skinny jeans ‘I hope Hank cuts right to the point, cause these will sweat the longer I’m in them’ You thought as you squeezed in. All you had to do was wait for Hank’s signal and sure enough, a mere five minutes later you phone dinged with a text ‘HORNY TIME xoxo’ so you made your way downstairs.

Hank’s bedroom had been fitted with a Sex Demonstrations sign to fit in with the storyline. You raised your hand to knock “Come in.” Hank’s voice sounded, you walked in to find Hank sitting in his bed shirtless “Well Hello Mr. Y/N. You’re here for your Sex Ed appointment?” “Yes Mr. Moody” you responded “Please call me Hank, or even Daddy, but never Mr. Moody” “Sorry Daddy” you drew out the daddy part with a gleam in your eye “Fuck, so eager to please.” Hank moaned, writhing a bit to tease you. “Fuck” you said breathily “Oh I will.” Hank growled “Strip” upon his command you began to take off each of your garments, giving Hank a strip show “Fuck, my dick is so rock hard that it makes Mount Rushmore looks like a stack of wigs.” Hank threw off his covers to show you his dick standing right up. “Fucking hell, I’ve never seen one from this angle.” You groaned out, Hank grinned wide, cocking his finger towards you “Come here.”

You moved forwards “Get on top of me.” Hank said and you did as he asked leaning down to kiss him. You made your way downwards making sure to get to smooth over his chest hair making Hank groan out an “Oh yeah” you made your way down to his cock & looked up at Hank waiting for your next instructions “Suck my dick. Get your mouth around it, cover your teeth with your lips and suck me off good.” With the challenge posed, you began. Keeping a smooth rhythm you sucked his cock, tasting his precum, you swirled your tongue around his head, making the man groan “That’s right Y/N, like that. Fuck, you’re better than my wife at this, better than anyone, keep fucking going!” You kept at it for a while longer before Hank ordered you off “There is a lost art of fucking when men get married to women, and that’s licking their balls. Do that to a man and you’re his forever.” Hearing this, you eagerly darted forwards sucking his balls into your mouth with the same process. “Oh Fuck! I didn’t expect you to be this vigorous. Get my musk into you babe. Get into my public hairs! Fuck, you don’t need me to guide you, you’re already a fucking whore!”

The acclamation off of Hank was utterly intoxicating, if you could live of this instead of food and water, you’d be set for life. Hank grabbed your head & pulled you back onto his cock. You quickly adjusted your technique as Hank began to stutter “Fuck, you’re gonna make me cum, take it all down your throat! Oh FUCK YES!” Hank yelled out as he shot what seemed like countless loads down your throat, the salty sweat taste sated your lustful need for the author now a panting wreck above you. “Fuck Y/N, I didn’t expect you’d be this good first thing.” “Well I aim to please Hank.” “Oh I see, once I cum, you’re back to Hank and not Daddy.” You shifted so you were gazing right into his face “Well you’re soft now, so you aren’t The Man now, only a regular man, what are you gonna do about it?” You said in a faux mocking way.

Hank pulled you down below him. You were able to breath his intoxicating scent where he was resting before “This” Hank responded before slapping your ass, you tensed but decided to keep the cocky character going “You call that a hit old man?” Hank slapped even harder “Who owns you?” “I own myself.” Another slap “Who did you suck off this morning like a good bitch?” “No one worth remembering.” A harder slap & this time you knew he was at brute strength so you let up “Who is your daddy?” “Hank Moody” He hit two slaps this time “Say it louder, old man has hearing problems.” “Fuck you.” You mouthed off, and at this point Hank went balls to the wall, landing a plethora of slaps on your ass. “Say my name whore, say daddy’s name.” “Hank Moody!” You cried out “SAY YOUR DADDY’S NAME BITCH!” “HANK MOODY!” You screamed out, Hank finally stopped and pulled you up to see your red, puffy face “You’ve been bad you fucking whore.” He growled out “I’m sorry daddy, let me make it up to you.” “I only let good whores take my cock. And you’re bad.” “Please sir! I’ll do whatever!” “Thank me for letting you give me a blowjob.” “Thank you daddy Hank.” Hank cocked his head to the side “For what?” “For your hospitality for sliding your dick down my throat.” Hank groaned out flopping back down on the bed “I slid my dick down your throat, and you thanked me for it! You are redeemed baby, you're my good whore. Good whores get rewards” he gestured down and looking the way he gestured, you saw he was hard again “Come sit on daddy’s dick!” You made your way back onto Hank and were about to work down his cock when he grabbed your hips “Slowly, so you can appreciate all my length, every vein down to the base.” You nodded and slowly sunk down, moaning at how big Hank was, you never really recognised before today that he had probably one of the best cocks in the world.

You began to work yourself into a slow pace, taking Hank’s blissed out face into full view “Fuck! This is some good old love making!” Hank grabbed your hips as he began to match your pace. You lowered yourself down to Hank, kissing him as he began to pick up the pace. You moved back grabbing his pecs as you continued to ride his cock. You began to tease Hank’s nipples making him groan “Oh fuck yes. That’s right Y/N work them over.” You now began to increase the pace, the fuck becoming faster. The air was thick with moans as you both fucked hard and needily.

You knew that Hank wouldn’t last long so you planned to make his next orgasm the best he’d ever had. You set a spinning rhythm causing him to cry out in pleasure. “Fuck babe, that’s so good!” Hank grabbed your cock and began to stroke it in time with your pace. The burning lustful senaation started in your stomach and you knew you were long gone to try and edge. Letting out a short “Hank, I’m cumming!” You shot all over his chest “Oh fuck! Man, that’s a lot!” Sensative but still wanting Hank to shoot, you moved rougher, your sensitive walls closing in on his cock “Fuck! Keep this up and I’ll fucking cum!” “Do it daddy, shoot in your whore’s ass!” At this, Hank lost all composure, grabbing you, he worked your pace even harder, you turning into even more of a moaning wreck “Yeah! Good whore! Daddy’s gonna fucking cum slut! Take all of it! OH FUCK!” Hank let out a powerful guttural lustful scream as he shot load after load. You grinning as the warm sensation filled you up.

“Jesus Christ! That was incredible!” Hank said as you fell next to him. “Yeah, we’ve fucked in every single room now right?” “Yeah, the rug in the lounge room has never been the same, I had to toss it for a new one.” You grimaced “Sorry about that.” You responded. Hank laughed while shaking his head “Don’t be, it was amazing. This was undisputedly the best fuck I’ve ever had, everything fell into place.” Hank shifted forwards “Fuck I’ve gotta piss.” You didn’t want Hank to leave however so with a wild idea in your head you grabbed him “Hank, maybe we could incorperate that.” “Like piss play? I’ve never done it before.” “Wow, I’ve found something even the great Hank Moody hasn’t tried.” “Fuck it” he groaned “But you’re washing the sheets later.” “Deal” you grinned.

Hank stood above you, cock pointed at your face “Ready?” He asked, you nodded your head and without any complaint he let go, a thick stream of gold piss cascading onto you “Oh fuck!” You moaned, the sensation was warm, you wanted to cover yourself completely in it “Oh yeah, this is fucking awesome.” Hank said, clearly loving your enthusiasm. A while later the stream stopped “That’s all I have.” Hank looked regretfully down at you “No matter.” You grinned “Thanks Hank.” Hank crawled back down, kissing you deep. Rolling around in your favourite author’s piss and kissing said author was not where you’d expected to be, but you’d gotten more adventurous as of late, now nothing was off the table.

[doof-doofblog]

"Will You Do That For Me?"

Monday 9th November 2020

Hello everyone!  Hope you've had a brilliant weekend! Seeing as we've been put into a second lockdown, I have recently been watching EastEnders episodes from 2008 on BBC iPlayer! I have to say there are so many characters I miss, to name a few:- Bradley, Tanya, Roxy, Ronnie, Peggy, Bianca, Ricky, Pat, Christian, Masood, Zainab, Jane ... A lot of these characters I do wish would come back, its a crying shame that some of them have passed away. What do you think guys? What characters from years back would you like to see return? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Anyway, let's get back to the episodes of this week, what a cliff-hanger Friday's episode was left on. I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens next this week, let's delve right into it. This episodes basically starts where Friday's finished, Mick coming face-to-face with his abuser, Katy. Mick is as white as a sheet, he looks like he's seen a ghost as she approaches him. It's interesting how innocent she is acting, but of course how else would she act after seeing him for the first time in so long. She informs him that Shirley had rang her informing that Frankie had been around, the first question out of Mick's mouth is why did she never tell him that Frankie was his daughter, Katy seems a bit shocked to hear this, she the tells Mick that Frankie is 100% NOT his daughter. Now, is she telling the truth? Has Frankie accidentally made a mistake? Depending how long Katy is going to be on the Square for, I can see this storyline be a really hard hitting one for Christmas! Katy suggests to Mick that they sit down have a talk and she makes her way towards the Vic.

As Mick slowly follows Katy into the Vic, the scene changes to Lola alone in her flat. She's just confessed everything to Jay about sleeping with Peter, months back! Honey walks in to find her almost in tears, at first she doesn't realise that anything is wrong as she asks her about her flat deposit, but when she turns to see Lola looking all teary, she asks the poor girl what's wrong. Lola comes clean and confesses that she slept with Peter months ago, she informs Honey that she's told Jay the truth before they moved into their new apartment, but she fears she has ruined everything between them. Honey sits down as she takes in the recent news, she then tries her absolute best to console her, she suggests that maybe Jay has gone to speak to Peter, considering they were best friends, Jay must feel some kind of betrayal from his friend, so perhaps he's gone and spoken to him about it. And she's not wrong - Jay is next scene in Beale household, he's sat with a cup of tea waiting for Peter to appear, poor Bobby has no idea what's happened and he's been left alone with a seething Jay. Jay informs the young lad that he's willing to wait for Peter to show up.

Meanwhile at the Vic, Mick is trying to understand the situation with Frankie. Katy informs him that Franke's father is just a random bloke that she can't even remember the name of. But Mick can't seem to quite understand, as in his mind, regarding Frankie's age and the fact the Katy simply just disappeared all those years back, it would make sense and would fit they she would be his daughter. Katy appears to be shocked at what she's hearing, she then happens to say something very interesting "You have to have sex to have a baby!" - she's implying that they never had sex?! Hmmm ... something really doesn't sit right with me, even Mick recalls of their relationship all those years ago and Katy can't even begin to believe what he's saying. She believes that he's told Frankie about her and that is why she is no longer speaking to her. Is Katy simply lying about their relationship? Is Mick perhaps mistaken? Or is this going to turn into something much darker and Katy is going to deny everything until Mick reveals everything to everyone and she'll be seen as his groomer/abuser.

Out on the Square, Lola finds Peter and admits that she's told Jay about them. Peter is shocked to hear about Lola's confession and informs her that Jay is waiting inside his house for him. Instead of walking into his house and facing the music, he decides to walk the other way, much to Lola's surprise. It's then he informs her that he has a job interview the next day and doesn't want to show up to it with a black eye. Hmm, I think that's a bit of a coward's excuse to not face his best mate and basically admit to his mistake. He can't keep hiding, he'll have to face Jay sooner or later.

Meanwhile, Rainie and Stuart are in the same position as we saw them in the previous episode. Bless them, they had both fallen asleep on the sofa together. Suddenly a bell rings (I instantly thought it was their doorbell) Stuart wakes and he looks at his phone to which then his wife wakes up and asks whether it's anything important. Stuart reassures his wife that it's nothing and he gets himself up to make themselves a cup of tea. As he looks in the fridge, Rainie takes a look at her husbands phone, as he turns round he sees her looking at his phone and she points out that the notification on his phone was a reminder for a visit to the fertility clinic, for the following day. Rainie admits to her husband that because they had booked it so long ago she had forgotten all about it, but Stuart didn't want to remind his wife as he didn't want to upset her. Will they still go this appointment? They both admit to each other that they still want a family, even if it means just being a family of two, but I'm sure deep deep down, both of them would love have a child if there was a way.

In the Vic, Ian is surprised to see his son, considering they haven't been speaking since the family found out about him re-mortgaging the Café and forging Kathy's signature. Peter informs his Dad that he needs to lie-low for a while, yep- he's simply avoiding Peter. Peter makes his way to the upstairs of the Queen Vic with his Dad's acceptance. Meanwhile, over at the Beale household, Lola has found Jay waiting for Peter. She's trying her absolute best to plead to her boyfriend and apologise, but Jay isn't having any of it. He's wanting to know where Peter is, but Lola admits she has no idea but Jay doesn't believe her, ask they're arguing Bobby can seen counting on his fingers again in an attempt to calm himself in this heated situation. Jay suddenly storms off in search for Peter.

Returning to the Vic with Mick and Katy, Mick is informing Katy about everything he remembers from their time together, going the cinema and she telling him she loved him. But Katy seems to have an explanation for everything he mentions. She recalls calling it their "little secret" because she took him to a rated 15 movie while he was just 12 and she didn't want to get into trouble. Plus she also admits telling him she loved him, but only in a motherly way. She appears to be really twisting it and telling him that he's not remembering things properly. (I'm sure that's a common factor of being an abuser, persuading the victim that they've got their facts wrong!) But suddenly Mick seems to remember everything so vividly, he starts to describe the night in question when he first slept at Katy's. Remembering the memory of being told to go upstairs and use a towel, her undressing him and then being asked to join her in her bed, to which he recalls that's when everything between them started. Katy doesn't seem to recall what Mick's saying is true, when they leave the Vic, Mick attempts to escape, informing her that he hopes she manages to find Frankie, but Katy isn't going to let him escape that easily, she informs him that what he has pretty much just accused her of, she could go to prison for. She tells him that their discussion isn't over and Mick takes her someone else more private.

Meanwhile in Cafe, Rainie watches as Denise enters with young Raymond. Rainie smiles at the small boy and asks Denise a pretty forward question, "How old were you when you had him?!" - understandably, that catches Denise off guard. It is quite a forward question which, to be fair, no one she be asked, but poor Rainie, in such desire of being a Mum, I guess she's probably thinking if Denise can, then why can't she? Regardless of their age! As far as I can make out, Denise seems to reveal to Rainie that she had Raymond at the age of 45? Which to be honest is absolutely incredible! Maybe this might give Rainie some hope? Maybe it's not too late for her to have children?

Returning to Mick and Katy, they eventually find themselves in the park. Katy seems to recall Mick's memories a bit differently, she recalls cleaning him up and putting him to pet, tucking him in and then she suggests that actually she slept on the sofa downstairs and not in the same bed. She remembers him crying and wanting to help him. While Katy is giving her version of events, a voice is heard from the other side of the park and Tina appears, she is incredibly excited to see Katy after such a long time. But as the camera looks to Mick as Tina and Katy are reminiscing, he looks like he's close to bursting into tears. Katy informs Tina that she's come looking for Frankie, it's then Tina mentions that she used to work at her bar and she instantly invites Katy to go round and have a look. As they walk on ahead they call out for Mick to come and join them, but he looks as if he'd much rather be 1000 miles away from Katy.

Meanwhile, in the Vic, Jay is still searching for Peter. He asks Ian whether he has seen him to which Ian denies ever seeing his son. As Jay orders a pint, Honey watches from a distance as Jay sneaks into the back of the Vic and up the stairs. Suddenly he becomes face-to-face with the Beale offspring and he scarpers into the bathroom. Jay chases after him as bangs against the bathroom door, calling Peter a coward for not facing him like a man! Peter makes a really pathetic excuse claiming he had no idea that he and Lola were even serious, to which Jay flips just that little bit harder and bangs against the door violently. Suddenly, Honey appears from the stairs and calls out to Jay to calm himself down ... I do believe that Jay would like to get his hands on Peter, but in all seriousness, what good what it do? It really wouldn't make the situation any better.

Back at the undertakers, Rainie brings her husband a cup of coffee. Stuart is looking crushed after the recent events, but something tells me that after Rainie bumping into Denise, perhaps it's given her some form of hope that perhaps there still could be a chance that they could become parents. Rainie admits to her husband that she thinks they should still go ahead with their appointment to the fertility clinic. She states that they've already paid and they wont be able to get their money back, and if there is just the smallest chance that it could work and they could become parents, they should grab the opportunity whilst they can. Stuart seems absolutely thrilled with the idea, but of course he's bound to have some concerns, he begins to tell his wife "What if -!" but she stops him in his tracks and reassures him, "If it doesn't work, then we've still got each other!" ... I have to say, I really do love this couple. They're the couple I never thought I would've loved and would've wanted them to have so much happiness. I feel so happy that EastEnders have brought these two together, they fit so perfectly and I know it sounds mushy, but I do hope they get their happily ever after, they are the ones who seem to deserve it more than any one else. Don't you think?

Back at the Vic, Honey is trying to console Jay, telling him how much she came to hate Adam by the end of their relationship. She tries to reassure Jay that things wont be like that for him, as Lola is deeply sorry for what she's done, and plus considering the fact that Jay loves her. Jay admits he wants to smash Peter's face in, which is understandable. But when Honey in speaking about Adam and how after everything he had put her through, it was the final straw for her, after a long line of straws, Jay is staring at her. Not talking, not even blinking - but Honey can see that he's looking at something, he's looking  straight at her. Has he come to realise he has feelings for her? He quickly thanks her and leaves the Vic, leaving Honey completely speechless.

At the Prince Albert, Tina and Katy are reminiscing after Tina informs Katy that she's attempted to get hold of Frankie. As they continue their conversation, Tina asks Katy why she left the care home so suddenly all those years ago, she explains that she fell out with the manager after he made a pass at her. She recalls being chucked out the next day without being able to say goodbye to anyone. It's then Tina mentions how devastated they all were that she had left, and described Mick as a love-sick puppy. Mick is sat on his own as his sister chats to his unknown abuser. Mick then speaks and recalls writing letter's to Katy but never receiving a reply from her, to which she admits is her biggest regret. She reveals she got pregnant with Frankie soon after leaving the home and that her head was all over the place during the time. Suddenly, Katy's phone pings and she reveals that finally Frankie has been in touch and she's wanting to talk to her Mum. As she gets herself ready to leave, she asks whether Mick will show her the way to the train station, Mick looks ever so uncomfortable as he follows her exit from the bar.

Back at home, it looks as if Jay has returned to talk with Lola. She is deeply apologetic for her mistake. Jay has calmed himself down and listening to everything she's saying. She must've apologised numerous about of times as Jay tells her that she doesn't have to repeat herself. She make a promise to him that she will never make the same mistake again. She asks for his forgiveness and he admits that he forgives her, but there will no way back for them after this, he tells her that things are over between them. He makes the interesting point that he's not as upset about it as he thought he was going to be. Lola is clearly devastated by what he's saying, but what he says makes sense - when she fell pregnant, Jay wanted to keep it but she didn't, when Jay wanted to get married - he wanted it, she didn't and it's probably the same with the flat. Jay reveals that he's not even sure whether she wants it, however Lola confirms that she does want all those things but just not yet, they don't need to rush into things. It's then that Jay drops the bombshell that he's come to realise that he doesn't love her in the way he used to anymore. Lola is absolutely devastated and pleads to him, she tells him that she can't be with anyone else except him, as no one else knows her as well as he does. But Jay is very gentle with her informs her that she will find someone else eventually as she's a very strong woman and someone will love her for who she is. With a mutual understanding between them both, they decide to end things. Which I find very sad, I've always loved Lola and Jay together and utterly believed that they belong together, I certainly can't see them being with anyone else on the Square, especially Lola. Something does tell me however, that Jay has developed feelings for Honey over recent weeks, what do you guys think? Do you think Jay will take his chance with Honey?! Are to sad to see Jay and Lola call it a day on their relationship? Who do think will be their next love interest?

The final scene of this episode is also quite an interesting one. Mick leads Katy to the train station and it appears he's still coming to terms with the information that his memory isn't quite what he thought it was. He seems baffled that his mind "invented" the memory. However something is shouting at me that his memory is true, and Katy has just completely twisted it to make him think it's not. Mick thanks her for everything she did for him back in the day and mentions that he hopes that she and Frankie will be able to sort things out. He also asks her to tell Frankie that he's sorry, it's then Katy tells him to tell her himself, but Mick feels like it's best for him step away for a while and let things settle. But Katy then drops the bombshell that Frankie will only meet with her Mum if Mick comes to. I feel like once again, Mick is being thrown into situation he really doesn't want to be in.

For me, I found this episode very fascinating, mainly regarding the character of Katy. I think there is something deeply dark about her, she comes across as this brilliant woman who helped children younger than her whilst in care, but I think it's all a cover up, what if she abused other children as well as Mick? I do feel there will be a huge storyline with her now she's arrived, will it kick off until or around Christmas? What do you guys think?! Either way I'm really looking forward to seeing how this storyline develops. I hope you guys enjoy the rest of your day. I'll be back very soon another blog. Thank you again for taking the time the read. Love you all xXx

[theunboundmeg]

Nefarious (Chapter Two)

Summary: Tina’s Halloween Bash is the most talked about party of the season! Getting “Sheet Faced” seems to be the “in” thing to do, and Y/N plans on doing just that. With her mom out of town for the weekend and Nancy and Steve finally convincing her to go with them (it really didn’t take much, since she’d already decided), it’s time to party. Only problem? Billy is probably going to be there...which means it’s likely to get heated.And what’s with all of the farmers complaining about their crops dying?

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Y/N (Reader)

Word Count: 4,192 Words

Rating: 18+ (For the Future)

Warnings: Cussing, insinuation, angsty angst! Also, drinking, smoking, and some weird situations!

Other: Please note, this story takes place at the beginning of Season Two and actually follows to the storyline. I thought it would be interesting to write from a different perspective of the main story and see what happened to one of our favorite characters while the others were off fighting the demodogs! Enjoy this and if you guys like this chapter, I’ll probably write more! <3 Also note that there is no planned amount of chapters for this yet. I will write this story until it just naturally folds up. So…look forward to MANY more to come!

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Chapter Two: Let’s Get Sheet Faced (Y/N Perspective)

  My fingers drifted over the various dresses, all hung up in a row. The thrift shop in town wasn’t exactly the most notable place to buy a costume from, but it was more likely to have something that the other girls wouldn’t be wearing. I could hear Steve and Nancy giggling in the next row of clothing. Jonathan moved over to stand next to me, pulling out a gaudy, silver dress that hung to his knees. 

“What do you think?” he asked, grinning at me knowingly.

“I think you’d be the prettiest one there.” I replied, nodding at him. 

  He snorted and put the dress back on the rack. I pulled out a small, form fitting red dress and frowned. I put it back and promptly pulled out another, though this one was black and...quite shorter. But it was in my size. I paused, opening my mouth to ask Jonathan what he thought, only to catch him gazing over towards Steve and Nancy. My fingers clutched tightly to the dress and I moved over to close the gap between us, nudging him gently.

“Stop with the puppy dog eyes...” I warned him.

 He shook his head and looked back at me.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” he replied, suddenly going on the defensive.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” 

  I cleared my throat and turned on my heel. Heading off towards the dressing room, I couldn’t help but be partially relieved to leave Jonathan to his thoughts. The guy was hopelessly in love with Nancy, but Nancy was with Steve. Such was the circle of life. Jonathan wasn’t really hard on the eyes. I felt pity for him, in a way. If I hadn’t sworn off dating (for the most part), I probably would have taken a crack at him, myself.

“Y/N!” 

  Nancy’s voice rang out, just as I was about to close the door to the dressing room. 

“What do you think?” she asked, holding up the white shirt and black skirt.

   I shrugged and closed the door.

“Honestly Nance, you’d look good in a paper bag. That is perfect though. Try it on!” I called, starting to pull off my shirt and jeans. 

  The minute the dress was on, I sucked in a breath. Sleeveless and above the knees. That was extremely bold, even for me. But some tights and maybe even a small sweater as a fail safe would be perfect. Depending on how cold it would be tonight, anyway. I opened the door slowly. Nancy was spinning in front of Steve, laughing and Jonathan was pulling out a jean jacket similar to the one he already had on.

“What do you guys think? Too much?” I asked, cringing an d preparing.

  Nancy sucked in a breath and Steve whistled.

“If I wasn’t a taken man, I’d have to hit on you, Y/N.” Steve said, grinning broadly.

“Be careful in that tonight. You might put a spell on someone.” he continued.

  I pulled the pair of cat ears out of a bag from the other store we’d been to earlier today and put them on. Turning, I looked at myself in the mirror and shook my head. This wasn’t something I would normally catch myself in, but for some reason it seemed like it was the right outfit for tonight. Why not, right? Mom wasn’t home and as long as I wore tights, I wouldn’t be too bad off. A short dress with tights was pretty safe, after all. A moment longer of staring at myself and I was back in the dressing room, rolling my eyes as I listened to Steve saying something and Nancy whispering. Poor Jonathan. He probably never even stood a chance. I considered asking him if I could ride with him to the party, but by the time I’d exited the dressing room, he was waving goodbye and fleeing faster than I’d ever seen anyone do so before. So much for that plan.

___

Ten o’clock hit and by the time we were in the car and heading to Tina’s, I was already regretting this decision. Nancy and Steve had had some sort of argument beforehand, so the air in the car was so still, you could hear a mouse sneeze. I cleared my throat and looked in my compact one more time, just to make sure all of the makeup was just right. I had no idea why it was so important for me to look as good as I did, but I was trying. That’s what being in the King and Queen’s clique did to you. You worked your ass off to look like one of the best. As long as you looked like them, you were one of them. Right? My cat ears protruded from my done hair and I couldn’t help but grin wickedly. Okay, I looked pretty damn good. The dress fit like a glove and the tights were the perfect shade of black. And those boots I’d found? My god. Mom had been holding out on me. Then again, if she’d seen me like this, I would have been grounded so fast my head would have spun.

“Nancy...it’s going to be fine. You look fine...” came Steve’s voice from the front of the car.

“Let’s just get to this damn party and for ONE night...act like stupid teenagers, okay?” replied his girlfriend, shaking her head and looking as if she had no urge to be there at all. 

  Something had changed, and I couldn’t quite figure it out. But I didn’t really have time to dwell on that. That second, Steve was pulling up at Tina’s. And oh, what a sight the place already was. A few teens littered the lawn here and there. Most of them were in costume, and a few were well beyond drunk already. The lower crowd, I guessed. After all, no one from Carol or our crew arrived at a party earlier than ten. It was high school etiquette, or something stupid like that.I opened my door and waited not a second longer to get away from the quarreling couple. I just wanted to get some drinks in me and get some dancing done. Outside, a few guys were ushering people over to try their luck at a keg stand, and a couple of girls were standing close enough to watch, no doubt calling shots on who they would want to get their claws into by the end of the night. What a time to be alive! I opened the front door and scanned the crowd. People dancing, people laughing, and even more people gathered around a punch bowl, dipping their cups in and drinking heartily. Fuck.

“Y/N!” 

  I looked over and saw Carol skipping over, her tiny work out leotard revealing way more than I thought was even possible. Though, Carol didn’t seem to mind. She giggled and wiggled a little in front of a few guys before wrapping an arm around my shoulder.

“Come! You HAVE to try the punch!” she cried, dragging me along.

  Ever since she and Tommy had broken up, she��d definitely become a more open young lady. She flirted with nearly everything that walked and called itself a male. Though, with the way she was treating me, I’d no doubt gotten away with my comment from earlier to Billy. Or maybe he just hadn’t gotten to her yet to spill the beans on what I actually thought about the girl.

“Here.” she said, smacking her gum and shoving a cup into my hands, “I love your costume by the way. Super cute.”

  She winked and made her way off, flouncing the whole way as she walked. Fuck, if I leaned that way, I’d hit on Carol myself. I watched her a moment longer before taking a sip of the punch. It took ALL of my strength to not throw that drink away immediately. The punch was good, but the vodka was so prominent, I felt like I was inhaling gasoline in the process. It was just going to be one of those drinks where I drank carefully and tried not to enjoy it after a while. The more you drank, the more the vodka taste disappeared...and that was when it got dangerous. I took another sip and wasted no time hitting the dance floor. By then, Steve and Nancy had found their way inside and were standing near me, talking briefly. The one thing I had on both of them was that I was social enough to acclimate to a party almost immediately. Probably one of the few talents I had that would eventually be useful later on in life. Extremely social, as mom tended to call me.

“BILLY! BILLY! BILLY!”

  I stopped dancing and moved to stand over near Nancy and Steve, looking towards the back door with them. The shouts only grew louder as a pack of guys moved in, one of them no doubt Billy, wearing a leather jacket and jeans...no shirt. I pursed my lips and knocked back the rest of the punch, wincing slightly at the burn as it moved down my throat. Of course he’d show up looking like that. A guy like that? He knew he looked good...and he owned it. Cheers rose from the crowd as they moved inside. Bodies became denser and the dancing picked up. Everyone was slowly making their way to buzzville. 

“Got ourselves a new King of the Keg, Harrington!” Tommy called, clapping Billy on the shoulder as they stood directly in front of us. 

  I looked down at my cup and swirled the nonexistent, acting as though the males in front of me didn’t exist. Nancy scoffed, turned heel, and made her way off towards the kitchen. It was then I looked up and saw Steve looking after her, longing...or worried. I couldn’t tell which. Before Billy could step in front of him, I swallowed my pride and ran interference.

“Don’t you have somewhere to be? Some girl to be rubbing up on?” I asked, hand on my hip.

  If Big Dick Energy had existed in this timeframe, it would have been used to perfectly describe the scene. Tommy seemed taken aback and began to laugh. Billy’s eyebrows shot way up as he realized just who he was looking at. It wasn’t long and those eyes were roaming over me again, drinking in every bit of my appearance. And for some reason, whether it was the drink making its’ way through my system or something else rising up within me, I didn’t seem to mind. I lifted my chin slightly, that defiant look coming across nice and clear. Steve took that moment to touch my shoulder and make his way off after Nancy. No doubt he’d be trying to puppy up to her or keep an eye on her drink intake. Nancy wasn’t my problem. These guys were...and I didn’t seem to mind standing up to them alone.

“Tommy, Carol’s over there. Maybe you should go pull her off of that guy and try to reconcile.” I said, nodding over towards the woman, now dancing on some guy from Junior Year. 

  Tommy’s face began to fume and he stormed off. Break up the couple, but you could never quite break up the feelings. That was the good thing about alcohol. I took one last look at Billy and turned heel. I wasn’t about to stick around and wait for him to make some comment about my outfit. The fact that I’d given in to the cat idea was already a strike against me, and he knew it. Nope. I wasn’t giving it to him.

“Cat Ears!” he called, apparently sticking with the nickname he’d called me earlier.

  I shook my head and continued over to the punch bowl, dipping my cup in and taking a good chug from it. Fuck it, right? A second passed and there he was, leaning up against the counter and looking at me again.

“I told you you’d look good in them.” he said, nodding to the ears, then staring at me.

  I tried to keep my gaze trained on his and NOT let it roam downwards towards his bare chest. The fact that it was peaking out from beneath the jacket was actually a sight. And the more I drank? The more I found myself liking it. And I didn’t like THAT. I swallowed a bit more of the drink and pointed at him.

“Don’t start. You could have the pick of the room. Anyone in here, you could torment. Instead, you’re actually going to choose me?” I asked, frowning.

  He laughed and shook his head. 

“Are you serious right now? You still sore about yesterday? All I did was ask if you wanted to explore a little.”

“You were cocky!”

“And you liked it.”

  I wrinkled my nose. He knew how to argue...and that got under my skin in a way I couldn’t quite describe.

“I think you just like it when a girl gives you a challenge.” I retorted, turning and starting to walk off again, taking a long drink from my cup.

“Run kitten! Let’s see how far you get before you come back!”

  I flipped him the bird over my shoulder, not even bothering to look back as I walked. The fuzzy feeling from the vodka was starting to take hold of me already. That’s how strong the drinks had been. I didn’t walk far and I nearly found myself slamming into Jonathan...who was not in costume.

“What in the hell?” I asked, looking him over.

“You realize this is a costume party, right?”

  He grinned and shook his head. “I don’t come to parties, remember?”

“Well, you’re at this one.” I replied, shaking my drink a bit at him. “Want a taste?”

  He took the cup from me and took a sip...and promptly began to cough. I laughed happily and took the Solo cup back from him.

“My god! What is that shit?” he asked, wincing as he forced the punch down.

“Something, something...pure fuel.” 

  He coughed more and I reached for his arm. A second of begging and he was convinced, being dragged over to the punch bowl. I didn’t expect him to drink much, if any...but it was still worth a shot, right? When in Rome, after all. We stood there for a while, people watching and cracking jokes at a few of the costumes that caught our eyes. Every so often, I caught him looking over towards Nancy and Steve and I shook my head.

“Jonathan. Go dance with another girl...it’ll make you feel better.” I said.

  He let out a short laugh, but did nor said anything beyond that. He hated that I was right, but just couldn’t get past it. He probably never would. I shrugged my shoulders and patted him on the arm. I mentioned something about dancing, and was off in my slightly intoxicated state...off to find some poor soul to dance with my uncoordinated ass. I didn’t mind though. In this state? I could do anything. I could fly if I really wanted to. Holy shit, that vodka was strong.

___

  Another two hours passed and midnight had hit. The party was still raging, but it was at the point where one of two things was happening. People were either getting sick, or peaking at their “best” drunken state. I had most definitely...peaked. I was dancing with someone, who I didn’t even seem to know, and having a GREAT fucking time. I laughed and spun around, holding my cup in the air as I did so. Okay, so maybe I’d gone past the peaking point. But still, I couldn’t tell the difference. I distantly heard a familiar arguing duo and glanced up only briefly to see Nancy and Steve rushing out of the room and towards the bathroom. I half expected them to make up in there...and that was when I decided I needed air as well. Fuck it...it was stuffy.

“I need air!” I yelled over the music to the guy I was dancing with.

  He understood, nodding curtly and reaching for my arm. Squeezing past the rocking bodies, we eventually made it outside and rounded the corner. It was much more private here...and I could finally catch my breath.

“Jesus...it’s ACTUALLY been a great party!” I panted, laughing again and reaching up to fix my cat ears.

“No doubt.” the guy replied, moving closer towards me, and eventually pinning me up against the wall.

  He captured my lips in a rough kiss, bringing a grunt of surprise from me. It took a second for it all to register in my head. And the minute it did? I was reaching to try and push him off of me.

“Hey!” I exclaimed, grimacing, “I don’t-”

“Well, I thought you did...so...”

  He tried to kiss me again and I turned my head away, shoving this time.

“I said STOP!” 

  I hardly had time to react before a fist was flying towards the guy, landing square in his temple. He fell backwards, slamming into the ground and yelping loudly. My eyes widened as I turned to see Billy standing there, fist withdrawing and chest heaving.

“Hey dickhead! Next time you put your hands on her, I’m going to make sure to BREAK your hands. Fucking hear me?” he asked, clearly seeing red.

  The guy nodded his head fervently, scrambling to get up and run from the scene. I stood there, trying to calm my breathing...and take in the whole situation in my intoxicated state. I stared at Billy a bit longer, then began walking towards the front of the house.

“Cat Ears!” he yelled, the sound of jogging footsteps growing closer behind me.

“No.” I said, shaking my head.

“Y/N!” 

  I stopped dead and turned around. He moved closer and reached out for me.

“You’re drunk. You want a ride home or something?” he asked, tilting his head slightly.

“Not from you.” I replied, stubborn as ever, “I can walk home.”

“I’m sober!” he exclaimed, the exasperation clear in his tone, “You need a ride home! You’re drunk and you can barely walk properly! What happens if someone jumps you? Kidnaps you?” 

“Billy! Shut up. No one gets kidnapped in Hawkins, okay?” 

  I snorted and rolled my eyes after saying it, then began off again towards the cars. I heard the jingle of keys and the footsteps as he fell in step next to me.

“Y/N. Let me take you home, okay? I’ll drop you off and you won’t hear from me for the rest of the night? Not even at school, if I can help it. Okay?”

  I paused and considered him, narrowing my gaze. It was then I realized...my only chance of a ride was gone anyway. Steve’s car was gone, as was Jonathan’s. What in the hell had happened between me leaving the party and walking up towards the front of the house? Holy shit. I sucked in a breath and considered my options. Fine. Fucking fine.

“Alright. But JUST this once.” 

  He grinned and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards his car. Everything seemed to blur as I walked. Maybe it was a good idea I was getting a ride, after all. And shit...he looked so good. No. Quit. Not this one. Not Billy. I glanced back towards the front of Tina’s house, only to catch Carol and Co standing outside, sharing a cigarette and laughing. Carol was the only one that seemed to be paying attention and the minute we locked eyes, I knew. Fuck. It was going to be everywhere. Everyone would know...Billy and I had left together. He closed the door for me on the passenger side and I sat back, waiting for him to get in as well.

“You okay?” he asked, getting in and firing up the engine to the Camaro. 

  I nodded again, glancing over towards him. I took in the sight, breath catching in my throat. There was something about Billy that no other guy seemed to have. It wasn’t the arrogance or devilishly handsome charm. No...there was something else there that I couldn’t quite put my finger on. I hated that. Reading people was a skill of mine, and I just couldn’t seem to read this guy right off the bat. I hated it. He stared back at me, then grinned mischievously. 

“She’s my baby, you know?” he asked, patting the dashboard before revving the engine again and taking off.

  I held on to the side handle as he drove, taking directions from me the entire way. Billy didn’t drive with reckless abandon, but he did drive like he didn’t have a care in the world. That was...kind of attractive too. Fuck, I was drunk. And when we finally pulled up at my house, I could feel myself swirling even more into the uninhibited vortex,

“You’re not as much of an asshole as I thought, I guess.” I said as he helped me out of the car and up towards the front door of the house.

  He laughed and opened the door for me after I unlocked it.

  “I’m not always a dick to pretty girls.” he said, making his way through the dark house with me, “Which reminds me...you want me to leave you on the couch or in your room?”

  I shrugged.

“Doesn’t fucking matter.”

  He helped me up the stairs towards my room, snorting with laughter as we BOTH tripped on the last step up. I tugged him towards my bedroom and when we finally breached the threshold, he let go of me and stayed still.

“I want to make sure you sober up safely, okay?” he asked, pushing his hands into his jean pockets, “Mind if I use your couch for a few hours? I’ll be out before the sun comes up.”

“Don’t bother,” I replied, “Mom’s out of town. Sleep in if you want to.”

 I pulled off my cat ears and began unhooking my dress. It was then I realized he was actually still standing there, staring in disbelief. 

“You’re...”

“What? You’ve never seen a girl undress before?”

“You’re drunk...” he breathed.

“Yeah, you said that already.” I shot back, shrugging.

  Something about this state was making me bold...too bold. I wasn’t sure how I liked it.But...I did. I stared at him and then...made my way over.

“I don’t like assholes...” I whispered, leaning in towards him, “But you’re trying to make me like you...aren’t you?”

  It was as if it was some sort of conspiracy. Maybe he was working against me to try and prove me wrong. The game...this game. I had to win. I reached out, my hand planting firmly against his bare chest, fingernails digging into the skin slightly. Billy hissed in response, leaning back against the doorframe...not moving.

“Careful.” he breathed, staring down at me, “Be very careful.”

“No...you be careful.” I said, leaning up towards him.

  Why be a king, when you could be a god? And who said God had to be a man? I was going to win this powerstruggle between the two of us. If it was the last thing I did, I was going to do SOMETHING to win over him. And for some reason? In my mind? This was the way to do it. That, and curiosity. My lips planted against his and I was overwhelmed. The smell of sweat, beer, and cologne intermingled between us and I couldn’t help myself. I kissed him harder, causing him to lurch slightly in surprise. But, he didn’t pull away. It felt like an eternity passed and his hands were suddenly on my hips, pulling me around and pressing me against the wall. Slowly, carefully, fingers trailed up along my sides, exploring every inch of me they could. It wasn’t long and one hand was in my hair, fingers tangling into my done locks. His other hand planted itself back on my side, holding me steady. 

  I kissed him hungrily, as if I was needy for it. I did need it. My arms wrapped around him, my own hands burying into his hair and tugging eventually. He groaned and let me pull his head back a bit. The grin on his face said it all. He liked it. Maybe I had won after all? And then it all stopped. He pulled away and shook his head slowly. 

“You’re drunk. And I’m not doing this with you while you’re drunk and I’m sober. If I’m going to have you, it’s going to be a time I don’t want you to EVER forget.” he whispered, that stare nearly overwhelming me. Shit.

  I swallowed the lump in my throat and pushed away from him, heading over towards my bed. Fuck changing. Fuck even making sure he found the couch or saw his way out. I just wanted to lie down and go to sleep. I’d kissed Billy Hargrove...and now I was never going to live it down.

“See you in the morning, Cat Ears...” his voice drawled out towards me as I drifted off.

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<Chapter One   Chapter Three>

Tag List:

 @ john-benderr @ salemlysi @ boundtomyfate @ ccidk @ drrramaaaqweeen @ asheseiler

[clocktower-fifty]

[3] Week 2 - Lots of Flowcharts

Wandering onto Week 2, starting to wonder if I’m getting in over my head, but we’re just going to have to wait and see!

On a personal note, I’ve had acquaintances hounding me all week to play Among Us with them... Guys I can’t make video games if I keep playing them :< Very fun, but very socially draining. I’ve also bought the Into the Spiderverse Art Book today, it makes me super pumped to work on a story idea I’ve had for a long time, but nooo, I gotta work on this game >:( So many fun distractions.

But you guys are here for Clock Tower 50, so here we go.

At the beginning of the week, I’ve taken that paper I made last week and put it all down on a Google Sheets file. Then, I’ve started ordering the rooms until I’ve made...

...This thing! The general blueprints of where each room is in the Clock Tower. I’ve made this using diagrams.net. I was a little apprehensive using this program, since I’ve tried it once to make a flowchart for a university computer science project and got frustrated, but I needed a quick and easy flowchart program and this one is free + online. It ended up being very simple to use this time around, so that’s nice!

As you can see, these rooms don’t make any sense space-wise, but we’re ignoring logic here. Each colour is a different floor, with the highest level on top in yellow and the lowest level at the bottom in green. Each rectangle is a room, there’s fifty rooms in total, hence Clock Tower Fifty :)

The game’s main “gameplay mechanic” is choosing which door to go through, and depending on their choices the story will shift ever so slightly.

A day or so after that, I drew some quick character mockups instead of paying attention to my Physics lecture:

(Ignore the weird turtle creature at the top left, that’s for one of my dream games which I can’t work on until I get more experience.)

Daphne is one of the teenagers (originally named Sofia in the previous post), and Reese is the player (originally named Charlie). I’ve also changed Gabbi’s name to Jasmine, which was actually her original name when I first thought up the plot (Tony [Reese], Skott [Samuel], Jasmine [Jasmine], Gabe [Travis], and Laura [Daphne]). Don’t worry at this stage I will stop changing the names. (At least in my notes until I redesign everyone.)

Speaking of designs, I really like Reese’s design that I doodled in my sketchbook. I like Daphne’s hair as well, but I feel like her design will probably see more work.

Anyway, in the previous post I forgot to share that pilot / piece of dialogue when I was first thinking up of the game. This was the draft for how the game was supposed to start...

...but I made that on September 1st, so I’m definitely not keeping most of this dialogue. (Travis/Gabe is also extremely out of character here.) We’ll see when I get there.

Alright enough meandering. From that flowchart/blueprints of the tower above I tried using the program Twine to plot out each choice the player can make.

The player starts off choosing between two doors. They have the choice of going through either door alone with the four other teenagers through the other door (2 choices), or they can go through either door with one person (8 more choices), or they can go through either door with two people (12 more choices), or they can go through either door with three.............

Let’s just say about an hour in I knew going through with that idea would be too insane, even for me. I was tired trying to plot out all the choices after the first door. So, I deleted that flowchart.

Time to downsize.

The first choice is made in the Observatory. The two choices are either the Aquarium room or the Space room. I decided to make the choices blend in together a bit more-- it doesn’t matter how you split up, but some split up scenarios would cause a different story. In this example, Samuel prefers the Space room and Jasmine prefers the Aquarium room. If you choose for them to be alone in the room they DON’T want, they get angry and that’d change the story. Daphne would not want to be alone period, and there’s also a branch if you choose for everyone to stick together, not splitting up. Five choices, that’s not so bad, I was thinking...

...Until it lead to this mess. If you look at the blueprint above, you can encounter the group you split off from if you choose correctly. That was on purpose, I like forced character interactions. However that leads to this problem-- if a character was split off from everyone in the previous room, what happens if they encounter the rest of the group again in the next next room? Depending on your choices, this can lead to all sorts of interpretations, and oof. There’s just so many storylines from there.

I attempted to shorten it by making bad endings (there’s a bad ending on the square with the red side), but looking at everything I know it’d take forever to complete this game. I do not have forever, I have dream games I want to make eventually. (Side note, I actually really like that bad ending, but I don’t know if I’d ever use it... If I never use it, I’ll probably tell you guys what that ending was supposed to be when the game is finished.)

Okay okay, back to the drawing board. 

It pains me to do this, but in order for this project to be doable, the player cannot choose which room their friends go to. They can only choose their own, or alternatively insist on everyone sticking together.

Okay I know this doesn’t look any better from afar, but trust me this is much more doable than the two previous attempts. Not only have I limited the choices drastically, but depending on the choices some paths would end up the same way.

While I personally hate doing that (what’s the point of choices if some choices would lead to the same ending??), I’m trying to keep to one rule-- each time you make a choice there will always be at least two paths. You cannot enter a room and have your choice be useless, i.e. no matter which door you choose it’s the same ending. This same ending must be conscious in a way.

As you can see from above, I’m not done with this flowchart. I’ve only done 12 rows out of the planned 26. (I would say I’m almost halfway there, but each row gets more and more complicated so I would say it’s more like I’m a quarter there, haha.)

I’m also debating on going with the bad ending thing, to cut off potential paths, but we’ll see.

Finally, to end this devlog, I’m trying out Todoist. I’ve never used that website before, but I think ending devlogs with a brief outline of my current workflow would be a cool idea? I put in some temporary dates of when I’m planning to finish certain tasks, but right away I can see that I’ll probably not make my planned January 18 release date, haha.

Next week, I should have the rough maps on RPG Maker, as well as finished the flowchart above.

Until next time!

- Marisol Cast

[fishfingersandjellybabies]

A Miracle In The Family - brood au

Characters: Clark Kent, Jason Todd, Lois Lane, Diana Prince, Dick Grayson, various others Pairing: implied/past superbat Summary: Jason ran off after his birth mother, and was now in the hands of the Joker. Clark just hoped against hope he’d get to his boy in time. A/N: Obviously this AU’s take on Jason’s (not) death. He’s 14/15 here (and Dick is around 18, here’s the breakdown of years apart the kids are if you forgot like I did). I don’t remember all of the canon Jason dying storyline, so forgive how it’s probably all wrong regarding Jason’s ma. I tried to follow the kind of outline of this I made in the last chapter of ‘Whole’ but suck at everything so didn’t really. Sorry ending is bad and vague. Jason attempts to be Robin a little after this but I don’t think he sticks to it much/for long, and this is probably a bit of a lead-in into how Conner and Tim get into heroing. 

Other Brood AU things.

~~

Clark could kick himself. Wanted to, honestly. Wanted to straight up die, was the real truth.

Because he didn’t notice. Somehow, he didn’t fucking notice.

Didn’t notice the extra research Jason was doing. Didn’t think about how Jason was talking about his birth mother an awful lot all of the sudden.

Didn’t notice the Robin suit was missing until now. Didn’t notice that Jason wasn’t home in his room, that none of his siblings had any idea he was gone or where he was going. Until it might just be too fucking late.

“Just…” He breathed into the phone. “I…I don’t know. Get to the house. Stay at the house.” A tremor, in his own voice. “Don’t let Cass or any of the boys leave your sight, okay?”

“Okay.” Dick practically whispered. Clark could hear the car roaring down the road in the background. “I won’t, Dad. I’ll keep them safe. Just keep me in the loop, alright?”

“I’ll try.” He paused, as he began to follow a river, knew the river was the trail to Gotham. “But even if I don’t, no hero stuff, okay? No waltzing in to save the day. You get to Smallville and you stay in Smallville, got it?”

Dick hesitated, and Clark could almost hear him biting his lip.

“Okay?” Clark repeated. “Promise me, Dick.”

“Yeah, but Jason-”

“Promise me.” Clark nearly begged.

Dick sighed. “Call if you need help. Me, Diana, anyone. Jay’s already run off on his own – apparently. Last thing we need is you doing it, too.”

“I will.” Clark swore himself. “I’ve already given Lois a call too, and she’ll be there when she can be. Though the Daily will probably want to cover this as breaking news so…I’m not sure how soon that’ll be.”

“No problem.” Dick mumbled. “I’m almost there.”

“Good. I’m sorry I took you from work.” Another pause, and Clark could feel Dick’s own fear, even through the phone. He wondered if Dick could feel his too. “…I’ll bring him home, Dick. I swear on my life.”

“Okay.” Dick murmured childishly. “I’m about to the farm, and I think I can see Conner and Cassie outside, so I’m gonna go.”

“Okay.” Clark nodded to himself. “Love you.”

“Love you too, Dad.” Dick returned, a little too seriously for Clark’s liking. Though, right now, nothing was going to Clark’s liking.

Dick hung up without another word, and Clark absently shoved the phone back in his belt, returning all focus to the city appearing over the horizon ahead, and the boy within its walls that he would do anything not to lose.

“Hang on for me, Jay.” He prayed, pushing with all his strength to fly as fast as he could. Mostly to himself, to whatever god that was listening. But also into the communicator in his ear, that connected only to Robin. He couldn’t tell if Jason’s was on, if he had it, or if it had been destroyed. But he could have sworn he heard a ragged breath or two. “Please just hang on.”

The city was already abuzz with what little information anyone had. Televisions and electronic billboards were all broadcasting the grainy video and blurry stills that the Joker had released. Repeating the god-awful news.

The Joker had Robin. The Joker had already beaten Robin into the ground. Would continue to do so until he was bored, or until the little bird died, he’d declared with that hideous laugh. And no one would stop him, even if they wanted to. Because no one could.

People looked up at him as he flew overhead, but for once, he had to ignore them. Had to keep his focus, no playing up to the crowds today. Not when his boy needed him.

Not when his son might die.

He could see them talking, though. Whispering. They all put two and two together, knew Superman was here to try and save Robin.

He could see them all pitying him, too. Because none of them believed he would make it.

Poor Superman, they sighed to each other. Just wasting his breath. Try as he might, no one gets saved in Gotham. That’s just the facts.

He didn’t blame them for thinking so. Gotham was cruel. Heartbreakingly cruel. They were just realists.

But he couldn’t let that stop him. Never had before, and absolutely refused for this to be the first time.

So he took a deep breath. Deep and shuddering. He wanted to cry, but knew he couldn’t. Not until he found his boy.

He exhaled, and kept that focus, waded through the heartbeats he could hear, looking for that one. That one of seven he knew better than anyone else on this ridiculous human planet.

It took him too long. Longer than it ever had before. But eventually he found it. Slow and weak, but around the west side harbor. Sweet, stubborn Jason.

He blinked and he was there, the heartbeat growing louder in his ear every second. But not faster. Oh, no. The louder it got, the slower it seemed to become, and dread filled Clark’s soul.

And suddenly, there was a beep nearby. Somewhere in the warehouse complex.

Beep. Second. Beep. Second. Beep. Second.

Laughter. Terrible, screeching laughter. Not from the same place, but somewhere close.

And below it all: tears. Quiet, pained sobs. A quiet gasp of “Mom…”

Beep. Second. Beep. Second. Beep. Second.

He could hear it in his ear too. Tinny and soft through that communicator he hadn’t been sure was still on.

Clark’s whole world stopped.

A bomb. There was a bomb.

The warehouse doors didn’t stand a chance. He burst through them like they weren’t even there, not caring where the shrapnel landed. A woman shrieked, and for once in his life, Clark couldn’t care less.

Because…there!

There, across the room. Jason was sprawled on the ground in a pool of blood. He was barely conscious, but was trying to stand, trying to get onto his hands and knees, looking at a point across the room. But his obviously mangled hand kept slipping in the blood, and bouncing off the crowbar that had been dropped next to him.

The bomb was between him and Clark, and it read two seconds.

Clark didn’t think. Didn’t even breathe. Took off across the giant room as fast as he could, afraid that it still might not be fast enough. And even as he moved, he saw Jason’s mouth move. Bloody and bruised, he watched Jason as he continued to stare across the floor, and once again said, “Mom…!”

Oh yes, the woman. Jason’s mother. His real mother, the one who abandoned him too many years before.

The clock struck one second, and he still didn’t care about her. Only cared about the boy he still felt too far away from.

But he was Superman. He was supposed to save everyone. Even the bad guys.

And how would Jason react, if he left his mother behind?

But there was no time to think about it, so he ran on autopilot. He grabbed Robin, curled him up into his arm, and then he turned, jumped and grabbed the woman. She was tied to a post, and Clark didn’t bother attempting to be gentle as he ripped her out of the rope.

He was a foot away from the warehouse threshold when the bomb went off.

He threw the woman out of the building and to the side as the heat hit his back. Curled his whole body around Jason as they were knocked to the ground, covered him as the fires cried and raged around them.

“Mom.” Jason wheezed, even as he curled his bloody fingers into Clark’s uniform. “M-Mom…!”

Clark glanced up. Could see the woman hobbling to her feet a safe distance away, looking into the flames for them.

Or…or was she looking for a way to escape?

“She’s okay, Jay.” Clark whispered anyway, ducking his head back down, refusing to let even Jason’s hair be exposed to more pain and injury. “I got her out, too.”

“C-Clark.” Jason coughed, and even in the shadow, Clark could see tears cascading down Jason’s battered face. “D-D-Dad…”

“I’ve got you, baby.” Clark murmured himself, holding Jason as close as he could. And even as he said it, even as he kissed Jason’s temple, relief washed through his body.

Because he did. He got to him.

Just in the goddamn nick of time.

The initial explosion finally settled, and Clark felt that it was safe enough to move. Carefully, he stretched Jason across his arms, tried not to cringe at the pitiful wails of pain Jason gasped with every movement.

When Jason was finally settled against his chest, Clark stood and looked around.

Jason’s mother was gone, and not a single trace of her was left.

“Sorry.” Jason sobbed weakly. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Clark suddenly wondered who the apology was for. Himself, or the mother who had apparently just abandoned him again.

He remained on scene just long enough for Commissioner Jim Gordon and his police department to arrive. Not on purpose, but it took him that long to get a safe enough distance away from the wreckage, and to think of a plan. Head to the nearest hospital? The Fortress?

But after speaking briefly with Gordon, and informing him that he was taking Robin, he decided neither of them were good enough, and headed towards the closest transporter to the Watchtower.

Jason came in and out of consciousness the whole journey, but the blood never seemed to stop flowing. He was whiter than a sheet by the time he got him to the ICU, and Clark was terrified that he’d lose him before they could get a transfusion started.

So he didn’t let go of his hand. So small and cold, Clark clung to it as his fellow Leaguers rushed around him, setting up tubes and machines and needles. Jason whimpered and whined, but he couldn’t do much else. He didn’t have the energy or the strength.

And even as his friends got him situated, and on the path to stability, Clark couldn’t help but fear the worst. What if they lost him? What would any of them do if they lost him?

What would his kids do? God, what would he do?

He didn’t think he could take it. Jeez, look at how he dealt with losing Bruce, and that was just a disappearance, an assumed death. Here, he’d watch, first hand, Jason wither away.

It’d destroy him. Him and Lois and his entire family.

He stayed, even after his friends did everything they could. Even after they got the transfusions going, the monitors beeping and the injuries wrapped or otherwise taken care of. Sat there, holding his boy’s hand, wallowing in the possibilities of the next twenty-four hours.

So he didn’t hear the rap on the door, or the throat clearing. Didn’t react until he felt a hand on his shoulder and jerked up to find Diana staring sadly down at him.

“I called home for you.” She whispered. “Talked to Lois and Dick. Told them what’s happening.”

“Thank…” Clark coughed, his throat unknowingly dry and scratchy. “Thank you, Diana.”

She nodded. “Dick is beside himself, and wants to come up here right away. Lois was able to convince him to stay home with his remaining siblings until morning.” Diana frowned. “The children are all beside themselves.”

“No doubt.” Clark sighed, risking releasing Jason’s hand to run it down his face. He blinked in confusion though, as he felt the early signs of stubble on his chin. “Wha…?”

“You need a break.” Diana suggested gently. “I will sit with him while you go rest.”

“No, I need to be here. I need to stay with him.” Clark shook his head. He glanced out the nearby window, though, and frowned. The stars were in a different place than he thought they should have been. “…How long have we been here?”

“It has been about ten hours since you brought him up here.”

“Feels like it’s been twenty minutes…”

“Because you are exhausted.” Diana tugged softly on his arm. “You need your rest.”

“But…”

“I will come get you the moment he wakes, should he at all.” Diana promised. “Jason will never be alone. I swear that to you, Clark. Not even for a second.”

And he wanted to shake his head. He needed to stay. He couldn’t leave his son, not after almost losing him. Not after not even realizing he’d gone.

But he knew if he didn’t, Diana would force him. Lock him into their makeshift prison, use Kryptonite on him.

And…maybe she was right.

“Just next door.” Clark mumbled, reluctantly standing. He stood for a second, before leaning down and kissing Jason’s forehead. The boy didn’t move. He breathed via machine for now, and it didn’t take an inhale for him for another second. “And if anything…”

“I will get you.” Diana nodded, all but pushing him from the room. “Rest well, my friend, and know that we will do everything we can for him.”

Clark nodded wearily, shuffling to the next door. When he got into the room he stood there, staring down at the white, clean sheets. He hadn’t taken off his bloody uniform yet, and was too tired to do so now.

“…I’m sorry, Bruce.” He found himself whispering into the silence. The silence didn’t answer. He sighed, swallowed the lump in his throat, and laid down on the cot.

~~

He awoke to another hand on his shoulder, and opened his eyes to find Dick staring down at him.

“Hey, Dad.” Dick whispered. He didn’t look much better than Clark felt, skin gray and dark circles under his eyes. He looked like he hadn’t slept. And Clark had to be honest with himself – his eldest probably didn’t.

“Dick…”

“You doing okay?” Dick asked as Clark sat up, stumbled to his feet.

“Fine. Tired, but…fine enough.” Clark mumbled as gathered Dick into his arms. Held him for just a moment. Relished in the feeling of Dick hugging him just as tightly. “Have you seen…”

“Yeah.” Dick croaked into Clark’s chest. “Lois is in there with Tim and Conner right now. Barry and Arthur are distracting Damian and Jon for the time being. Diana is helping Cassie process it all.” Dick sighed, leaned his weight against him. “I just…needed a break.”

“I know the feeling.” Clark mumbled into his eldest’s hair. Absently rubbed at his back. “I’m just…god, I’m just glad I made it in time.”

“Me too.” Dick agreed, leaning back. Clark couldn’t help but hold Dick’s cheek. He just looked so tired. So much older than his years. “…He looks terrible, Clark.”

“I know, son.” Clark nodded, that lump in his throat from before he slept still there. “I’m glad you didn’t see what I did when I found him.”

Silence.

“…Has anyone said anything?” Clark asked, gently turning Dick towards the door and leading him out. He heard Jon’s laughter before he saw them. Found his mouth twitching into a small smile as he watched Barry run around (at a human speed) with Jon on his back. Damian was sitting on a sofa nearby with Arthur, critically examining his trident. “Found anything out?”

Dick kept his frown, glancing towards the door of Jason’s room.

“Typical Joker things.” Dick mumbled. “…The mom was in on it.”

Clark froze. “What.”

“Jason’s mom.” Dick repeated, sounding just as bitter as Clark felt. “She was working with that bastard. Knew what the Joker had planned, more or less, and lured Jason there anyway. J’onn said her being tied to a pole was probably the Joker betraying her. Can’t say I’m surprised.”

Clark turned away, looked in through the window of Jason’s door. He still wasn’t conscious. Lois was holding his hand. Tim was holding the other one. Conner was at the window, staring angrily out into space.

“…I regret saving her.” Clark whispered furiously. “I’ve…I’ve never regretted saving anyone, not even Lex. But.” His fist tightened. “I will regret saving her until the day I die.”

Dick didn’t say anything to that. He didn’t act proud. But he sure didn’t act disappointed either.

“…He must have known.” Clark murmured thoughtfully, glancing at Dick when he heard Damian call his name. Watched Dick give him a tight smile and short wave. “Jason, when I found him. He…he had to have known.” Quieter, sadder. “…And he was still trying to save her, when I got there.”

Suddenly, Clark realized what Jason’s initial apologies were for.

Dick bit his lip. Closed his eyes and looked away. “…What are we going to do, Dad?”

“No, no. There is no ‘we’, Dick.” Clark pushed, turning towards Dick completely. “Nothing here is your responsibility.”

“He’s my brother.” Dick pushed back. “We share a room. I should have noticed something was up. I should have stopped him before any of this happened.”

“No, you shouldn’t have.” Clark shook his head. “Eight people live in that house total, and not a single one noticed. I didn’t notice. If this is anyone’s fault, Dick, it’s mine. Not yours. Never yours.”

Dick sniffed, wiped at his eyes.

“Besides, you did what you were supposed to, honey.” Clark put a hand on his shoulder. “You came when I called, and you took care of the rest of the kids.”

Dick turned back to look into Jason’s hospital room himself. He didn’t gasp, or break down, the tears just silently started pouring down his face. Clark did the only thing he could. Just pulled Dick back into his arms, and held him as tight as he could as he sobbed into his neck.

“What if he doesn’t make it?” Dick wailed. “God, Clark. Dad, what if we lose him?”

“Don’t think like that, sweetheart.” Clark whispered, holding the back of his head. “Please, don’t. Just have faith in your brother, okay? Jason’s a tough kid. If anyone can make it through this, it’s our Jay.”

Dick gave a little hiccup, and tried to nod. Clark just held him. He glanced over once, saw both Diana and Arthur watching them sadly.

But with Arthur distracted, Damian made his escape. Hopped from the couch they were on and came running at them. Didn’t say anything when he reached them, just latched on to Dick’s waist.

After a moment, Clark released his eldest, turning to his second youngest. “Hey, baby. Can you do me a favor?”

Damian didn’t let go of Dick, but glanced up curiously.

“Take Dickie over to Uncle Arthur, okay?” He asked. “And how about you tell him what Uncle Arthur taught you about Atlantis and the trident.”

Damian nodded, and shifted only to take Dick’s hand and drag him away. They didn’t make it to Arthur, before Cassandra appeared too, giving Dick just as big a hug as Damian and Clark had.

Clark smiled, just a little. His kids were so smart.

He waited long enough to watch Diana lead them all back to Arthur, and all of them pile onto the sofa, before turning and entering Jason’s room.

Lois looked up at the sound of the door. Tim glanced at him for just a second. Conner didn’t move from the window.

Silently, he walked around the bed, pecking Conner’s temple before wrapping a loose arm around Tim’s shoulders, rubbing at his arm.

Jason was unchanged. Still pale, covered in wires, but worst of all, unconscious.

“How soon until he can come home?” Tim asked quietly. It was naïve, but so innocent it broke Clark’s heart.

“I don’t know, Tim.” Clark whispered. “I just don’t know.”

“Boys, can you go make sure Jon and Damian aren’t driving the League out of their minds?” Lois asked politely, standing from her chair. Tim nodded almost gratefully, like he was looking for a reason to escape the room. Clark didn’t blame him. Jason was a soul-crushing sight.

He shrugged off Clark’s hand, then turned and tugged Conner’s elbow until the other moved. They disappeared silently.

Lois waited until the door was closed before looking back at Clark. She studied him for a moment, then tilted her head.

“How you doing, Smallville?”

“I feel like he looks, if that makes sense.” Clark murmured. “I just…I want to fix it. I want to fix everything. I’m Superman, I’m supposed to. But…I don’t know how.”

“Clark, you’re not a doctor. You know you can’t.” Lois offered. “The best you can do is be there for him, like you always have been. Be there for him and the other kids.”

“How am I supposed to be there for all of them if I’m barely dealing with it myself?” Clark whispered sadly, running a hand through his hair. He didn’t realize how greasy it was until now. “God, Dick just broke down in my arms because he thinks Jason’s gonna die. I can already tell Conner’s going to bottle this all up until he explodes. Tim looks like he’s aged one hundred years since yesterday, and I don’t even want to know how this will affect Cass and the babies.”

“I’ll help you where I can.” Lois smiled. “And while you’re there for the kids, I’ll be there for you. So will the whole Justice League and your parents and your friends at the Daily.”

“I appreciate that, Lois. Thank you.” Clark sighed, hooked his fingers around Jason’s. They were still so cold. “…God, Bruce would hate me for this.”

Lois’s comforting demeanor dropped immediately. “Clark…”

“And I wouldn’t blame him.” Clark woed. “Christ, he left his kids with me because he thought I could protect them, and here I almost got one killed.”

“At least you were there. At least you got to him in time.” Lois countered. “And like you said, he left them. He’s not the one here at his son’s bedside. You are.”

“He’s dead, Lois.” Clark reminded. “He’d absolutely be here if he wasn’t. Hell, Jason wouldn’t have ever gotten the opportunity to run off if Bruce was still able to raise him.”

“My point is, don’t do this to yourself, Clark. The what-ifs and thinking about Bruce isn’t going to help.” Lois tried. “You don’t need it, and neither does Jason.”

Clark sighed, and glanced out the door. Zatanna was there now, distracting Conner, Cass and Damian with magic tricks. Diana’s protégé Donna had appeared now too, and was sitting where Arthur had been, Dick leaned exhaustedly against her neck as she hugged him, smiling at Jon on his lap. Tim sat next to Dick, half leaning against his brother while teasing to tickle Jon at the same time.

Then he looked back down at Jason. Comatose and half-dead. A shell of himself.

“What do we do now, Lo?” Clark whispered.

Lois sat back down, retook Jason’s fingers for her own. “Now we wait.”

~~

Clark sighed as he sat down, inhaling the steam from his fresh mug of coffee. Smiled softly at Dick in the chair next to him, long asleep from before he even arrived. But the love for his brother was still palpable in the air, even if you didn’t notice the almost-actually-beard stubble on his face.

He’d been against the idea at first. Dick, trying to start out on his own as a young adult, taking a leave of absence from his job to stay at the Watchtower with Jason 24/7. That wasn’t Dick’s job, that was Clark’s.

But now he appreciated it. Appreciated the little shop in Smallville who employed his eldest for now. When he gave them the vague story, they’d immediately said to take as much time as he needed. Even mailed treats to the house, and started a tip-jar fundraiser for Jason’s (non-existent) medical expenses.

People were still good, despite where he was right now, and that was always a nice thought to remember.

He blew on the steam from his coffee and looked at Jason as he sat down. It’d been about two weeks now, since he’d found his boy in the nick of time and brought him to the Watchtower to heal. Two weeks since he’d fallen into a coma. Two weeks of waiting.

It all hurt a little less now. Mostly because nothing had changed. Sure, in the days after, Clark found the Joker and threw him in prison. But much like always with Bruce too, the bastard escaped and went underground. And Clark had bigger things to worry about right now than uselessly chasing him around a city that wasn’t his.

But after that, it was this. It was Dick sitting up here alone most of the time, give or take what ever League members were on the Watchtower, then Clark joining him whenever he could leave the office, or write his articles remotely. With Lois offering to stay with the others in Smallville, he slept here, with Dick at Jason’s side, then returned to the office the next morning.

The children came to visit often, even when they weren’t supposed to, but Dick being up here so much was bad enough. He wasn’t going to let the younger ones waste away up here too, even though they all desperately wished to.

Otherwise, this was it. A fresh cup of something hot, a book or documentary to watch, machines beeping, and this boring, ugly, gray room.

Every. Single. Day.

So today wouldn’t be any different. Today, he shouldn’t expect anything to be any different.

Except, apparently, it was.

He was sitting there reading, had already tuned out all sounds. Tuned his powers to listen only to the sounds of heartbeats. Of the slow, steadying breathing of Dick and Jason. Calming, for the most part.

So he missed the quiet groan. Missed the little word, almost, just assumed it was Dick talking in his sleep.

But he sure didn’t miss that second time.

“…Dad…?”

He was on his feet so fast, the chair he shoved backwards was embedded into the wall behind it, the mug sitting on the arm shattered amongst the wires lining the floor.

Jason’s eyes were barely open, and even struggling that as Clark gently put a hand on his face. It took him a good five seconds to find the strength to raise his eyes and meet Clark’s already tearful gaze.

“Whu happened…?” Jason slurred. “W’ere are we?”

“In the Watchtower.” Clark whispered, running his other hand over Jason’s greasy, shaggy hair. “Safe.”

Jason didn’t seem to actually understand anything he’d said. Just blinked slowly. A little too slowly, and Clark almost thought he was going back to sleep.

But then his gaze jerked back up, hazy and not completely there. “Joker?”

“He did this, yes.”

Jason’s eyes twitched around the room, even as he leaned into Clark’s hand still on his face. “…Mom?”

“Alive. I don’t know where.” Clark shook his head. Leaned his foot out and began softly, but urgently, tapping his foot against Dick’s shin. “She…ran off, when I got you both out.”

“Oh. Okay.”

Dick stirred, then. Grumbled a little, but sat up rubbing his eyes. It took him a second, about ten, to realize what was going on.

“Oh my god.” He was on his feet as fast as Clark had been, and practically pushed the elder out of the way to get to Jason himself, curling him protectively into his arms. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.”

Jason’s fingers twitched in an attempt to hug Dick back, but it was all still too new, and he was still too weak.

“Dick.” Clark murmured. “Careful.”

“Yeah.” And Dick was already crying. Already practically sobbing into Jason’s hair. “Yeah, I know.”

Clark gave them that moment. Let Dick smother for a minute or two more, then carefully pulled him back by his shoulder.

“You gonna make it?” Clark joked. Dick just laughed and wiped his eyes. “Go grab whoever’s on the station for me, please? Then call Lois if you could. Let her know what’s going on.”

Dick nodded, then gave Jason one last look, as if he’d be gone by the time Dick returned, then dashed out into the hall.

Clark watched after him for a moment, as he bound happily around the Watchtower, until he once again heard the tiny, weak voice.

“…Dad?”

Clark looked back, kept his own warm, relieved smile as he stepped back up to the side of the bed. Jason’s eyes were a little clearer now. A little sadder.

“Dad, I’m so sorry.”

Clark just nodded silently as he perched on the side of the bed and wrapped one arm carefully around Jason’s shoulders. Jason collapsed against his side just as J’onn appeared in the doorway and made a beeline for the medical equipment.

Clark didn’t respond to Jason. Just gently rubbed at his shoulder and gratefully kissed his head. Held him while J’onn began his examination.

~~

It was over another month before Jason was released to even go recuperate at the farm. And even when he was, he was sent home with a laundry list of medications, physical therapy routines, and a calendar of when Justice Leaguers would be visiting for follow-ups.

But when he was released, the whole family went up to gather him. Tim, Conner and Cassie carried all his clothes and personal items, with Damian carrying a loose thing or two. Dick handled the medications. Even Lois went, and she volunteered to take all the paperwork, and threatened hell on everyone if even a single word on any of these charts was wrong.

Jon clung to Jason’s side from the moment they arrived at the Watchtower, and refused to leave it. Would whine and cry if anyone tried to pull his hand from Jason’s, and even trigged his previously-unused heat vision. So, they left him there, and he acted as Jason’s personal escort from satellite to horse stable.

They used the transporter, with Lois going before Jason to catch him on the other side, and Clark coming after. And even when they landed, Jon gleefully continued his duty, and was the one gently leading Jason across the dirt, back towards their home.

At one point, about halfway, Jason stopped, already exhausted. Jon waited patiently, staring off into the distance, waving at some birds flying overhead. Clark silently came up on Jason’s free side.

They’d already talked about it. Of course they had. What Jason had done, what he was looking for, what Clark came upon with only seconds left. They’d talked about it, and re-talked about it. They’d shouted and cried and apologized a thousand times over, and then some.

But still.

“Your family’s right here.” Clark reminded, putting a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “I know it’s a different story when it comes to biological parents and all that, but…don’t think you have to go looking for someone to love you. Not when you have all these people here who already do.”

Jason nodded, leaning into Clark’s side. “I know.” He smiled, then gave a little laugh. “Well, I know that now, anyway.”

A moment to just stare at their house, like they were a couple of old men.

“I love you, Dad.” Jason whispered. “Thanks for not giving up on me.”

Jason stepped forward again, and Jon jumped right to his side, already asking him if he was alright, that he could take another break if he wanted, that he’d bring him a burger from downtown if he wanted it, or his favorite cow from the pasture, who missed him a lot.

Clark smiled, watching the two go into the house. Then let out a long exhale and looked into the sky. Thought of Bruce, for just a moment. Thought longer about how truly lucky he was right now, in this moment.

“Never, Jay.” He promised. “Absolutely never.”

[sordm5]

Fallout: New Vegas Character Sheet / OC Questionnaire, 5k+ words

This is the part where I pray for consistency with my previous character essays...

The majority of these answers are from a character building perspective. Other perspectives are kept in parentheses. 

Mason Shepherd McCoy

which faction did they side with (NCR, legion, yes-man, or house)?

Unwittingly, he sided with the NCR. But he abandoned the cause shortly before the lead up to the Second Battle for Hoover Dam.

preferred armor?

He favors dusters, but beneath that, he usually dresses in raggedly layers. Cycling between two pairs of majorly distressed and ripped jeans, and collected vintage scarves he finds from abandoned buildings.

(In game, light armor. Specifically the courier fatigues from the Courier’s Cache mod, modded with the standalone Lonesome Road courier duster.  

Screenshots: front / back)

melee, guns, energy weapons, or unarmed?

Most skilled with a ranged bolt or lever action rifle.

After a compromising incident while he lived in Zion, Joshua attempts to teach him unarmed combat. But because Mase is a difficult, stubborn student, the lessons don’t continue on for long, and Joshua’s patience is tested to its limit.

highest skills? secondary skills? lowest skills?

His skill in everything aside from guns and repair are fairly mediocre, but his worst skills are definitely survival and unarmed. It’s pretty transparent that Mase’s priorities are focused on catering to his preference for gunplay.

(It’s hard to avoid having every skill high when level ups are forced on you, so I'm going to ignore in-game stats in favor of character development. Speech is the most notable skill I prefer to max out, but I don’t know if it’s exactly character-fitting for Mase considering he’s not actually a talkative person.)

SPECIAL stats?

3, 9, 6, 4, 7, 8, 3

what are their perks?

Confirmed Bachelor, babey. And Hand Loader. That one’s important.

(I'm not sure if this is asking me to list all perks my character has, but for the sake of not doing that – as it would be lengthy and tedious – I’ll leave it at these two.)

favorite companions? least favorite companions?

Mase adores Arcade more than he cares to admit. However, that adoration doesn’t overpower his own cowardice. He carries the weight of endlessly wondering what fate befell Arcade after Mase left the Mojave. He likes to...imagine he’s happy with the Followers, tending to new researches that could maybe benefit the public. The mental image distracts him from his guilt, at least.

The only other companion Mase was close with was ED-E. He doesn’t actively hate or dislike anyone, though.

any romantic partners? how do these relationships begin and end? are they healthy?

Yeah...Mase kinda...tries to pursue a relationship with Joshua, but it’s majorly onesided, and overwhelmingly unhealthy. Even Mase is aware of the unhealthy aspect, despite his feelings.

-

I’ve thought a lot about how to avoid making this sort of scenario lore-breaking. I can’t realistically picture, given what we see and know of him in-game, that Joshua would ever reciprocate any sort of romantic feelings anyone might have for him.

This might be my own interpretation, but I think by the time the courier meets Joshua, he’s resigned to live his life thinking he can find redemption through his faith. And I think he’s convinced himself to be wholly devoted to it. He even twists the biblical quotes he uses as excuses for his own internal anger. He needs to think that the things he does are justified by God.

Beyond the religious dedication, Joshua tells us that he feels indebted to his family, and the tribes of Zion, for welcoming him back like he had never done anything to shame them. After questioning him about his past, and the defeat he suffered, he ends with, "I will never be able to repay the debt I owe to them, but I must try." The way this is all presented leads me to believe there isn't much room in Joshua's life for anything else.

Also, on another note, one quote by Mr. Sawyer, who wrote the entirety of Joshua Graham’s character, stuck with me:

It's not as simple as being "set on fire". After suffering a terrible failure, he was humiliated by his superior and the people he commanded. He was cast out and left for dead. His entire reason for living was gone. When your entire way of life is completely destroyed, it has a profound impact on how you view yourself and your place in the world. [...]

Read the entire quote here.

There was also a quote, if I am indeed recalling correctly, by Josh Sawyer that expanded upon Joshua’s dialogue in-game that spoke about the love he received upon his return to New Canaan – about how he was in disbelief over it, how he thought he didn’t deserve it. But I can’t find that quote again, so don’t take my word for it.

I know that the developer’s input isn’t the “word of God”, and that Sawyer has said that he strongly dislikes when authors discourage fan interpretations and have an almost authoritarian hold over their stories. However, I still find it useful to reference dev commentary when expanding upon my own ideas.

Returning to the original point, as much as I’d really just like to say ‘they both lived happily ever after’ about my courier and Joshua, it’s not something I can picture happening. Joshua isn’t an ordinary man, and domesticity wasn’t ever an option for him.

-

There are some deeply self-indulgent scenarios I’ve written about for Mase and Joshua, and even in the more intimate pieces it always takes Joshua years to think it’s okay to even let Mase sleep next to him. So, I don’t imagine within the first year of staying in Zion anything even vaguely resembling intimacy would develop between them. Mase would have to come back to Zion after returning from the east coast and put a lot of work, time, and dedication into getting Joshua to open up on that level.

But, because I don’t feel fully confident in discussing my thoughts of how things change within the game post-canon-storyline (both base game and Honest Hearts/all DLC alike), these ideas and scenarios remain strictly self-indulgent. One detail I am comfortable saying that happens post-NV is that Mason does eventually come back to Nevada and end up settling there.

Since this is already a sort of a self-indulgent post about my oc, I will share some jumbled-context thoughts I’ve had. But keep in mind, if I were to keep this confined to my comfort on respecting the canon storyline and not exploiting it for my own purposes, this would have ended with Joshua never reciprocating, Mase leaving the west coast and returning at some indeterminate point, years later. 

With that being said...

Mase and Joshua argue about the feelings between them a lot. With Joshua it’s always “You understand my position, we’ve spoken about it countless times. You’ve said you understood, yet you continue to persist.” / “I know. And, I’m...sorry. I just can’t help but feel like I’m a nuisance to you. That the way I feel disgusts you-” / “You know that isn’t true-” / “You always push me away-” / “I’ve told you why-” etc, etc.

The closer they get, the more doubt Joshua begins to show, the more he pushes Mase away, and the more Mase wants reassurance that Joshua still finds him important, in some way. Joshua does value Mase’s companionship, but what Mase gives is unabashed love, and there’s a huge discrepancy in outward reciprocation. Mase tries his best to adapt and subdue how he feels – to try to understand and match the level at which Joshua keeps him. But it’s hard. A lot of “you don’t care about me like how I care about you” feelings.

Joshua insists the discrepancy isn’t true, and it’s only perceived that way by Mason. He loathes when he’s forced to remind Mason of his situation – of the path he’s chosen to take in his life, his dedication to it, after what happened to him at the Grand Canyon. How large the amount of atonement he owes. How, even if he wanted to break away from this path, there are still things he would never be able to do for Mason.

Of course, Mase tries to keep all of this in mind. But with the lack of communication, and the constant distance from Joshua, it’s hard to know if the boundaries are because of Joshua’s self restraint, or if Mase is truly no longer wanted. He’s just...very troubled and brokenhearted by it all, and the situation isn’t easy.

There’s also the awkward re-acquainting with each other after the years they spend apart. Which is disheartening to Mase because, before, he’d felt Zion was akin to a home due to the time spent there, and, when he comes back, it feels foreign – like there’s no place for him anymore. Everything looks and seems different. It takes a long while to get over that feeling.

Joshua looks different after all that time, as well. He never takes to fully discarding his bandages – it’s too personal for him – and his scarring doesn’t ever necessarily fade, but they do heal, lessen in severity, and subsequently cause him less pain. Because of this, he’s more comfortable exposing his forearms without bandaging, and the areas around his nose, mouth, and jaw. 

It takes Mase a moment to process this upon first seeing him again. In the past, he’d only ever seen Joshua without his bandages but one time, and it was because he’d been gravely injured and in recovery. He thinks it’s a good look for Joshua, though. And, more importantly, he’s overjoyed that he isn’t in as much pain.

Mase also continues travelling even after his return to the west. Especially between his home in northern Nevada and Zion. So it’s not as though he spends his every day with Joshua, although...he does try to persuade Joshua to visit his house and stay for awhile. Which he does eventually succeed at, after some complications on tribal responsibilities.

-

...tfw you set out to write about your own character and end up devoting the most time writing about Joshua Graham. To be fair, I have another huge character post about Mase that establishes way more about him, and I’ve been meaning to write about the dynamics with Joshua for awhile now.

yes, i’ve thought a lot about this. damn.

anyway...

doesn’t it suck when your first love after you get retrograde amnesia is a revenge obsessed warlord with misplaced dedication to a faith that he manipulates to lie to himself that his revenge obsessions are justifiable :(  real sad boi hours

gender / sexuality / ethnicity / species / etc.?

Boy/gay/???

He doesn’t know much about his ancestry, or the roots of his past in general. Doesn’t want to know. He’s pretty sure he’s human, though...maybe. But he’s also considered the possibility of being an alien misplaced on earth. Maybe...

He’s also not particularly attached to his biological sex. He is genetically male, and does predominantly identify as male, but it’s not something he feels is important or necessary to his identity as a whole. On a basic level, this applies to, say, clothing. If he found a dress appealing, he’d wear it without thinking much about what gender a dress was intended for. If that makes sense.

This sentiment is also applicable to sexuality. He doesn’t really label himself in any specific way. He just knows that the majority of people he’s found even somewhat attractive or appealing happen to be men.

where were they born/raised? when/why did they leave?

He doesn’t know.

when, why and how did they become a courier? how long did they remain a courier before benny shot them?

Again: part of a past that he doesn’t remember. Brings him anxiety over the thought of finding an answer to who he was before.

how did the bullet affect them?

Retrograde amnesia. His memories never returned. After awaking at Doc Mitchell’s, it was difficult for him to acquaint himself with who he was. He didn’t recognize his voice, his age, his appearance. Nothing felt familiar. His speaking patterns even sounded foreign to his own ears.

Other than that, recurring migraines that plagued him for weeks after his awakening.

how did they deal with benny?

He spared him. Read more here. 

what’s their reputation with the ncr / the legion?

Liked/Neutral

Mase aided the NCR whenever necessary, especially during the beginning of his travels in the Mojave. He refused to agitate the Legion. He never realized he was weaving himself into becoming a mercenary of war for the NCR, and, had he realized they were going to proposition him for such a task, he never would have helped to begin with.

In retrospect, after abandoning the Mojave, his regrets in assisting the NCR don’t add up to much. After consideration, he realized he would prefer an NCR victory as opposed to a Legion one. He’s aware there might have been a better alternative, had he stayed, had he put himself at the forefront of the decision making. But, he simply isn’t that kind of man.

what’s their reputation with goodsprings / novac / primm? (i know primm reputation was cut from the game but like let’s pretend for a minute sdkfjd)

His reputation with Primm would be the worst of all three, entirely due to his uncaring mistakes in handling finding new authority for the town. The NCR wasn’t the worst of the outcomes, but it still wasn’t favorable with the existing community, and Mase only realizes that after it’s far too late.

Goodsprings and Novac act as the friendliest respites Mase knows, and he is mostly in good standing with both towns’ residents. He assisted Goodsprings during the trouble with the Powder Gangers, and, similarly, assisted Novac’s trouble with feral ghouls.

what is their motive for taking vegas?

He doesn’t. Ideally, freedom for Vegas and Freeside would be what Mase would want, but he’s too prone to fleeing from pressure and stress. He doesn’t want the responsibility of an entire populace on his shoulders, and when presented with fight or flight in regards to the war for the Mojave, Mase chooses flight.

what do they look like? how tall are they? are they attractive? any piercings, tattoos, scars?

Just under 6′. Tanned, freckled complexion. Hair naturally dirty blond/light brown-ish, but frequently bleached lighter. Crooked, gapped teeth. He has multiple scars over his entire body, but half he can’t even remember the causes of. The most prominent ones being the bullet wound in his hairline, and the surgery scars from the Think Tank.

how old are they? do they know their birthday? if so, what’s their sign?

22 around the time of the events of Goodsprings. His birthday is November 22nd, information courtesy of his Mojave Express ID card, and not of his own memory. I suppose that makes him a sagittarius.

The only fitting quote I could find from a sagittarius horoscope was: “You are very critical of those around and of yourself and sometimes will prefer to isolate yourself.”

do they speak any languages other than english?

He doesn’t. He tries to learn the language of the Dead Horses and the Sorrows, but only retains basic phrases.

can they read, write, do math, sing? did they ever receive an education?

He is educated, but only utilizes his intelligence in areas that are practical to him. Like the kilometer calculations while adjusting his rifle scope. Other than that, he frequently writes in a journal that he received from the Mojave Express. Its primary function was to track deliveries, but he re-purposed it for personal use.

Mase is also somewhat of a collector, and, in his home, he has a guitar with rusted metal strings and a piano with many keys that don’t work (don’t ask about the complications of transporting the thing from an abandoned pre-war home to his own safehouse.) He aspires to fix them both and learn how to play them, and maybe write his own music, but he doesn’t often get time to do so.

what were their parents like? are they still on good terms with their parents?

Doesn’t know who his parents are. Doesn’t want to know.

what’s their d&d alignment? 

Starting off as neutral good, but quickly becoming chaotic neutral the longer his travels across the Mojave go.

how’s their karma?

Canonically neutral.

how do they feel about killing people? do they try to avoid it?

He doesn’t actively seek confrontation – he’s no murderer – but he doesn’t have any moral objections to killing if there’s a good purpose for it. Killing the “bad guys”, etc. He’s not a coward either, and he’s confident in his gunplay abilities.

do they take chems? if yes, when and which ones?

Other than admittedly using med-x a couple times in attempts to treat his insomnia, he tries not to dabble in drug use outside of meds for intended purposes. His preferred poison is alcohol.

do they gamble? where? is their luck good?

He doesn’t partake. The atmosphere of the casinos on The Strip gives him a deep sense of discomfort. A piece of the world, frozen in time, sheltered away from the destruction of the wastes that lay just outside the doors. Men in suits, focused on their greed, their only concern how much nicotine they can inhale.

In his tattered duster and ripped blue jeans, face smudged with dust and dirt, Mase feels horribly wrong amid all the leisure and recreation. It’s stifling.

where do they usually sleep? do they have more than one home location? do they live with any other people?

Throughout his campaign in the Mojave, Mase doesn’t ever keep a main base of operations. From his room at Novac, to the Lucky 38, to Zion, to anywhere he’s welcomed to rest his head for the night. He keeps his belongings down to what he can carry, or things he’s isn’t afraid of losing if left behind.

After his return to Nevada from his journey out east, Mase settles in an abandoned, lone ranch somewhere in the mid-north part of the state. It’s there, in his late-20s, that Mase truly finds himself able to call a location a home. He begins to collect more, and his safehouse soon turns into an unorganized, messy museum of sorts.

what are their favorite weapons? where did they get these weapons?

He’s partial to his rifles, both bolt and lever action alike. Namely, the Medicine Stick and Paciencia, courtesy of the Gun Runners. He takes to further customizing both rifles (and altering the customizations already applied).

do they flirt a lot? is it well-received?

Mase and Arcade have a platonically flirtatious relationship. Neither of them desire to take it further than that and are comfortable in their friendship. However...there are nights Mase remembers fondly: bedrolls haphazardly thrown onto the floor of whatever safe place they could find to rest in their travels, Arcade somehow ends up in Mase’s arms in the early hours of dawn, his head tucked into the crook of Mase’s neck, Mase’s fingers carding through Arcade’s hair as the haze of sleep slowly fades.

Though Mase later ends up developing feelings for Joshua while in Zion, he doesn’t dare anything close to flirting. He regards their relationship as too important for empty flirtatious comments, while also knowing it wouldn’t be received well anyway. Between them, it’s more of mutual respect and trust.  

At some point during Mase’s year stay in Zion, Joshua does clue in to the way Mase treats him, and what that alludes to. They speak about it, if very sparingly, and it can be summarized by Joshua vaguely referencing whatever is between them by saying: if Mase is waiting for something from Joshua, he’s waiting in vain.

do they goof around a lot? do other people find it funny or do they just entertain themselves?

Mase has short-lived moments of hyperactivity, but is usually more stoic in nature. He recalls his time spent with Arcade as having some of the more expressive moments in his life. So it’s to be said that he has the ability to be a more humorous or entertaining person as long as he’s comfortable around the company he’s with.

what do their companions think of them? are they close? have they done any companion quests?

He doesn’t stay with anyone long enough to become truly close to them, aside from Arcade.

ED-E is Mase’s first real travelling companion. After repairing the eyebot, Mase decides to keep it and regards it as little more than an extra weapon. The longer the road takes them, the more Mase finds himself talking into the open air about a myriad of things. Sometimes it’s a mess of world salad and scattered thoughts – the product of distant feelings of deja vu and the many migraines the bullet wound had caused.

The more this happens, the more Mase starts feelings like ED-E is listening to him. Maybe the beeps that he gives aren’t indicators that he’s listening and are just coincidence, but all the same, Mase starts to see a personality in ED-E, and starts to think of him as less of a weapon and more as a friend.

On a fittingly drunken night at the NCR Mojave Outpost, Mase crosses paths with Cass. He enjoys her attitude and her humor, and more than delights in sharing a bottle of whiskey or two- or three, or four. Beyond that first night of drinking challenges and hazy blackouts, and a few following encounters, Cass and Mase don’t stay as travelling companions. Fast friends over a bottle of brew, but nothing more.

Later, but still early in his travels, Mase finds himself with his hands full in Novac. It’s here he helps Boone uncover the truth about the person who disposed of his wife. He agrees to arrange the revenge without hesitation. There’s not even a droplet of blood on the red beret atop Mase’s head; he doesn’t flinch when Boone takes the shot.

Unfortunately, Boone’s animosity and hostility towards the Legion prevents them from travelling together. Mase understands, and it’s left at that.

As for Arcade, well...some of Mase’s largest regrets concern Arcade; how he feels he must have let him down after he’d left. He’d known of Arcade’s ideals, about his feelings towards what he’d wanted for the the people of Freeside, and Vegas as a whole. The wayward feelings of hope Arcade found in him. The rare moments of open vulnerability in the secrets Arcade shared of his past. Just how many things were shared between them, and how Mase let it go to waste for nothing – for his own cowardice.

For as much as having someone close to him by his side gave Mase strength, it also added to the weight of expectation from the pressure he already felt. Arcade wasn’t enough to change that. Nothing was.

do they draw, paint, play any instruments?

His main creative outlet is his journal. Writing and doodling little sketches. He doesn’t consider it a “real” art form, though.

how do they deal with injuries? do they use stimpaks, healing powder, med-x? does a companion help them? can they bear a lot of pain, or do they need to attend to injuries immediately? when they do have to see a doctor, do they have a preferred doctor, or do they just see anyone?

Mase has a high threshold for pain. The first time he’d been seriously injured (from memory) was during the shootout in Goodsprings. A bullet had pierced his upper left arm, thankfully missing any arteries, and became deeply lodged without breaking through the other side of the impact site. He remembered noticing he’d been struck was delayed, his arm had felt hot, wet, and uncomfortable, but almost indistinguishable through the adrenaline.

Once he noticed the red stains from the hole in his jacket, he stared wide-eyed and pale at the blood flowing from the open wound, the pain spiking like a blistering heat. He didn’t know what to do with himself; didn’t groan, didn’t cry, just stood with a lost look. He was in good company, though, and Doc Mitchell was there to care for the wounded.

Subsequent injuries have been reacted to with similar disconnect. He understands the importance of tending to wounds through the lecturing on infection from the Doc, and because of this tries to treat injuries as urgently as possible. However, if he can help it, he’d rather take a stimpak and slap a bandage over the wound and call it done. Fortunately, Arcade doesn’t let him get away with that one very often once they start travelling together.

have they ever been irradiated? how did they deal with it? did it have lasting effects?

In contrast to the high pain tolerance, Mase cannot handle radiation. In slight doses, it’s manageable, but when his Pipboy near deafens him with its Geiger clicking, like clockwork, the nausea immediately sets in. It debilitates him, and the contamination to his body never settles until he flushes it.

He recalls an instance of trying to bear with the radiation, barely dragging himself up the road from Novac, forcing himself to try to tough it out. He realized he’d made a mistake when he started profusely vomiting, and immediately checked his Pipboy for the nearest medical help.

Trudging up the slopes to Camp Forlorn Hope, Mase manages to make his way to the medical tent, limbs shaking and fatigued. Of course, Dr. Richards insists on helping him, having already been acquainted with the doctor from previously assisting with missing medical supplies. Mase had been hoping on a return of kindness when he’d chosen Forlorn Hope, while also not averse to being sweet-talked.

It seemed simple enough, let Dr. Richards hook an IV to his upper forearm, relax, and let the Radaway do its job. But...Mase had been shaking and hyperventilating from the nausea, and right as Dr. Richards offered him a reassuring “It’s going to be all right, buttercup”, Mase lurched and vomited on the doctor’s shoes.

Needless to say, one of his top most embarrassing moments.

in conversation, are they kind? gentle? sarcastic? rude? do they speak warmly and openly with people, or are they more guarded? do they talk a lot?

Generally very soft spoken, with little to say, especially in regards to strangers or people he’s just met. A monotone speaking pattern, with tendencies to a blunt manner of speaking his mind.

However this changes the closer he is to someone. He becomes more adaptive to the other person’s speaking patterns, becoming more or less talkative depending on the personality of his partner.

do they like long journeys through the mojave, or do they prefer to travel more quickly? do they prefer using roads or travelling through the deep desert?

It depends. He’ll have bouts of wanting to travel long, deserted stretches of land, leaving time to himself and his thoughts. No companions. And other times he’ll prefer to stay to more populated areas, not wanting to be alone, and dreading the idea of being left with no one but his own thoughts to keep him company.

name a random fact about your courier.

He has hang-ups about his name. For the first few months of his “new” life, he didn’t have a name, and was simply called “Courier” – which doesn’t entirely die out, even after he discovers his real name. The title “Courier” is something he more familiarly associates with his being/existence/person.

A continuous problem that his amnesia left him with was the inability to grasp or understand who he was. As time goes on and Mase becomes more self aware, this effect does diminish, but the conflicting feelings he has about his name remain. Sometimes he feels like his name is an important identity – one that he’s afraid of losing again, and sometimes he wants absolutely nothing to do with it.

When he leaves the Mojave, he throws his first name away completely, and takes to only telling people his middle name. Arcade had called him “Mase” consistently, with fondness; Joshua had only ever called him “Mason”, never the shorthand version. Somehow, that felt important. He didn’t want these memories to resurface – he didn’t want to remember what he’d left behind, or feel that pain – so he abandoned the name completely.

do they watch movie holotapes? what are their favorites? least favorites?

(Say The Man With No Name trilogy exists in the Fallout universe. That would undoubtedly be Mase’s favorite.

I admit I haven’t thought much about this sort of thing. The main kind of entertainment I imagine Mase consuming is mostly the radio. In-game, we have Radio New Vegas and Mojave Music as far as music/entertainment goes, but I like to think there would be other stations where the main focus is storytelling. Reruns from pre-war times, and newer stations featuring people recounting tales from the wasteland.)

what do they do with the lucky 38? do they like being there? do they leave their companions there? if they’re a yes-man courier, do they open it back up as a casino?

Much like how Mase feels towards the rest of The Strip, the Lucky 38 is a stifling, unwelcoming environment. He takes advantage of the shelter and amenities given, but he knows he’s being watched – being kept close like a useful tool, exactly how most factions and people in power treated him. He doesn’t make a habit of using the Lucky 38...but, he does like the convenience of running water.

what do they do after hoover dam?

Wanders out east towards Ronto. It’s possibly the most aimless 4 years of his life. He has no purpose, he falls onto self-destructive behavior, and loses what little sense of self he was able to garner from his time in Nevada and Utah. Ultimately, after confronting many internal fears and doubts, with not a slight bit of soul-searching, Mase makes the decision to go back home to Nevada.

how do they die? how is their death received, by the mojave and by their companions?

... (I haven’t gotten that far. I’ve only just barely decided Mase settles in Nevada, which is dependent on an NCR Hoover Dam victory. Which is extremely important to how things change in west coast territories. And thinking of Mase’s future involves thinking of the future of Nevada and the west as a whole. I don’t know if I’m capable of handling the weight of the aftermath of the NV storyline with my meager ideas.

I do imagine Mase would die from a shot to the head, though. Seems fitting.)

what are their vices? are they an alcoholic, a thief, a hoarder?

Mase has always had a proclivity for alcohol – these habits severely abate during his time in Zion, and then rise to a destructive level of full alcoholism during his time out east.

Hoarding has a negative connotation to it, right? Generally collecting garbage, and other trash? Mase collects items he finds to be interesting in his home in Nevada, but it’s not rubbish. It’s more of a collection similar to the likes of a museum.

can they cook, and if so, what do they cook? what are their favorite & least favorite foods?

Despite having less-than-useful survival skills, Mase is very interested in cooking recipes. The easiest and most satisfying one to follow is the desert salad, with more difficult recipes being mushroom cloud and wasteland omelette. He’s only had the opportunity to cook the latter two once each (thanks Quarry Junction and Bloodborne cave), and he savored every moment of both meals.

Another favorite would be iguana bits – a food he’s tried to replicate, but can’t quite pin the recipe for down. Besides that, he admittedly has a palette for pre-war sweets. Fancy Lads have a specifically...gone off...flavor about them, but he enjoys them all the same.

did they kill caesar? vulpes inculta? what about prominent ncr figures, like kimball and colonel hsu?

He doesn’t kill any prominent figures. Perhaps if he had been a different person, he would have been openly hostile toward the Legion – he disagrees with their values, and despises their leader – but this was not the life he felt he could lead. He already had enough paranoia about the prospect of having enemies coming back to kill him from the life he couldn’t remember, let alone adding to that by agitating any specific faction or group.

/

I deleted some questions I felt were already answered well enough in previous posts about Mason. Namely: this one.

I also just deleted things I didn’t feel like answering because it was too much effort.

The companions question is unfinished because I felt like that bit was getting really unorganized and chunky to read. So, some companions are omitted. May go back to this and edit it / add more to it.

[twdeadfanfic]

Life at the end of the world Pt.6

Summary: Your life as a zombie apocalypse survivor. It starts with the Reader settling into the camp at the quarry, before s1 and then follows the show events and storyline, more or less, but with the Reader in it.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

Warnings: Slow burn, violence, language.

Author’s note: Sixth part of my first twd fanfic, I’ve been itching to write something like this for a long while and I write it for fun, I don’t claim to be a writer so if you find you dislike this fic, please be kind and just stop reading. English’s not my first language so maybe there’re some mistakes, I apologize in advance. For the same reason, I can’t write character’s accents and things like that. At any rate, I hope you enjoy it. There’d be several parts to this.

Next morning the search for Sophia continued after Daryl informed Rick and Shane of his idea of going alone, and you split groups to search through the places Daryl and Rick believed to be your best chances.

You were with Andrea and T-Dog, glad you were still on the search even if it wasn’t with Daryl. You were feeling better and you felt a bit silly you’d reacted like that to him telling you he’d go alone, like if it had meant you were totally pushed off the search because you weren’t good enough.

You guessed you’d been going through lots of emotions and even the smallest things triggered you now sometimes.

You tried your hardest but went back to the farm without any trace of Sophia, same like Shane and Rick. Daryl wasn’t back yet, he’d more ground to explore, and you could just hope he’d have better luck than all you.

There wasn’t much to do besides waiting for Daryl, so Shane decided it was time to start your shoot training. You all drove to the place he had decided was the best and started with the basics, how to hold the gun, charge, and everything you might need before starting shooting at your targets.

By the end of the practice, you were feeling content enough, managing clean shots your targeted bottles almost all the time. Still, you knew it wasn’t that easy to shoot to something that was moving, especially if you had to move too.

Later that day, you were sitting alone on the porch. Carol and Lori had told you about their plan to make a big dinner Hershel’s family as a thank you, but you weren’t as good of a cook as them, and between them, Patricia and Beth the kitchen was quite full.

When you saw Maggie walking near you, you decided to go and talk with her for a bit, maybe get to know her a bit better. Besides, you’d seen the hearts in Glenn’s eyes since they went together on a run, and the farmer girl didn’t seem to mind his company either.

“Ey, Maggie, hi!” You greeted.

“Hi, Y/N right?” She greeted you. “You need something?”

“Nah, I was just passing time. I don’t cook well enough to be making the feast they have planned.” You giggled awkwardly.

“Yeah, me neither.” Maggie gave you a genuine smile. “You can help  me set the table if you want, though.”

“Sure, fine!” You smiled back. “By the way, I wanted to ask you, what are your intentions towards my boy Glenn?” You couldn’t help but tease.

Maggie's face went serious and she frowned at you. “What the hell are you talking about.” She grumbled.

“I was just joking...” You raised your hands in surrender. “But everyone can see how he looks at you...”

“Really?” Maggie seemed mortified.

“He gives you the heart eyes.” You chuckled fondly. “You don’t like him then?” You had thought she did...if not then Glenn’s heart was going to break and you really hated having to see that.

“Not really...I mean...I don’t know?” Maggie shrugged and his cheeks turned pink, and you couldn’t help your smile... Maybe she did like him after all.

“He’s...he’s sweet, I enjoy being with him...but I don’t know if I like him like that, you know?” Maggie kept talking. “We just met and...I don’t know...”

“Well, all I can tell you is that Glenn is really a good guy.” You said seriously. “And good things don’t seem to happen much in this world anymore, so if you enjoy being with him, then maybe you should? I don’t know, I’m not that good at this stuff actually...”

“Yeah, well, maybe you are right...Thanks.” Maggie gave you a smile. “Help me with that table?”

“Sure thing.” You nodded but didn’t move, your eyes scanning the path to the woods.

Daryl hadn’t come back and you knew he was perfectly capable of taking care of himself, it wasn’t the first time he was alone in the woods, he’d been there at night too, but still, you worried. What if something had happened to him and you didn’t know.

You tried to end that train of thoughts. Probably he was just taking advantage of as many sun hours as he could, he’d be back after dinner when the sun went down. Maybe he had even found Sophia.

“The man of the crossbow’s still out there looking for the little girl, right?” Maggie asked you, following your eyes, and you nodded. “I hope you’ll find her soon.”

“Yeah, me too...” You murmured, following Maggie inside to prepare everything in the dining-room.

A moment later you were back at the porch. Hershel had walked into the room and had looked pointedly at you, making you understand he wanted to talk with her daughter alone, so you shrugged, gave Maggie a smile and left, hoping she wasn’t about to be scolded for Glenn or something.

You were sitting down on the stairs, focused on your book, when you heard a gunshot. Dropping the book you rushed to your feet and ran towards the sound. You gasped aloud when you saw Rick and Shane dragging a blood-stained, unconscious Daryl.

“What happened?!” You asked panicking.

“I...I shot him...I thought he was a walker...I...” Andrea replied, seeming in shock.

“Not time for that now.” Rick cut her off.

You nodded and ran back to the farm as fast as you could, calling for Hershel, who rushed out, helping Shane and Rick carry Daryl into the downstairs room, Patricia rushing in too, carrying everything Hershel might need.

Time seemed to pass slower than ever as you waited for news about Daryl’s condition. You were sitting down with Carol, holding hands as you both looked anxiously towards the corridor. Carol’s other hand hold Sophia’s doll against her chest. T-Dog had given it to her, telling her Daryl had brought it with him.

After what seemed an eternity but wasn’t even that long, Rick finally appeared with news.

“He’ll pull through, he’s doing fine.” He reassured all you.

You grimaced as Rick explained how Daryl had taken an arrow to the side, besides the bullet that grazed the side of his head, and seemed to be pretty banged up,  amazed he was still not only alive but doing fine, as fine as anyone could be after all that.

“He told us where he found the doll, Carol, we can keep looking around there,” Rick told to Carol gently, but she just nodded silently.

That evening you were all having the most delicious, yet silent and tense dinner you had had since the world went to hell, when you saw Maggie and Glenn passing notes under the table. You smiled, arching your eyebrows at the girl and she rolled her eyes but smiled.

You saw Dale and Hershel were noticing too, as if the dinner weren’t uncomfortable enough. Still, you almost had to chuckle, Hershel was Maggie’s daughter and now Dale seemed to be acting like Glenn’s father, both worried about their kids dating. Some things never changed.

“I’m gonna get Daryl some dinner,” Carol told you and you nodded. You finally got to have a real dinner and the poor one was bedridden.

It seemed the mood wasn’t going to improve anytime soon, so right after you finished everyone got up and began helping, taking everything back to the kitchen and doing the wash-up, making plans for the morrow and taking care of everything that needed to be taken care.

You made your way to see Daryl, wanting to check on him, you hadn’t seen him yet and also intending to take his plate back to the kitchen. You knocked on the door and walked in.

He’d the sheets wrapped around him tightly and up to his chin, his back to you, and you couldn’t help a soft giggle. You thought he looked kind of cute like that, like a Daryl burrito wrapped in sheets.

You’d thought he was asleep but the turned to face you when he heard you snicker, frown on his face and glaring at you.

“What you laughing at?” He growled.

“Nothing...” You shook your head, not wanting to voice your silly thoughts.

Daryl was looking at you angrily and you realized he thought you were laughing at him.

“I just thought it was fun to see you so wrapped in sheets.” You tried to explain without making an idiot of yourself. “Looking like a human burrito or something, you know...” You tailed off, embarrassed.

Daryl was still eyeing you warily but eventually seemed to decide you weren’t making fun of him and relaxed a bit, but still looked at you cautiously.

“You okay?” You forced yourself to ask despite the awkwardness, you’d gone there to check on him after all.

“Vet says I am...doesn’t feel like it though.” He grumbled and you thought you’d never heard him sound so tired.

“I bet...” You murmured, looking at the bandage that covered the side of his head were Andrea’s bullet had grazed him. “You were just shot.”

“Fell on my own damn arrow too.” He growled grumpily. “Fucking horse threw me downhill..”

So that’s how it’d happened, you’d been wondering about it. You still thought it was a miracle he was alive.

“Too stubborn to die, right?” You joked darkly and nervous, trying to lighten the mood a bit and to your surprise, Daryl chuckled at your words.

“Wanted to prove something to my brother.” He rasped. “Piss him off too.”

“I saw him, hallucinated him or something.” He explained when he saw your confused face. “Told me I was going to die there.”

“Always an ass even in hallucinations.” You rolled your eyes.

“I liked to see him...” Daryl murmured, sounding vulnerable. You knew he missed his brother, no matter how Merle had been. “Until he started talking bullshit. Said some truths, tho.”

“Like what?” You were genuinely curious. Merle wasn’t there, whatever he’d said to Daryl had to come from his own mind.

Daryl said nothing, shifting to the further side of the bed and turning his back to you again, finishing the conversation for good. As he turned, though, the sheets fell off his back and your eyes opened wide when you saw the scars that marred his skin.

“How you got those?” You asked, shocked, before you couldn’t stop yourself. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t...” You added quickly, flustered at your indiscretion.

The scars were intentional, there was no doubt about it, as they seemed to follow patterns. And almost all his back was marked with them, different sizes but all looking deep and painful.

Daryl looked over his shoulder and lifted the sheets to cover his back again quickly when he saw what you were talking about. You apologized again, taking the trail and making to leave.

“Told you my father was an ass...” Daryl muttered so quietly you almost couldn’t hear him before you could open the door.

You were horrified. You’d already put together that his family had treated him badly and that he’d probably been neglected as a kid, but this was something else. You couldn’t believe his own father could have done something like that to him. It broke your heart.

“I’m sorry...” You whispered, making Daryl turn around to glare at you angrily.

“I need no pity!” He snapped, looking at you in disgust.

“It’s not pity...” You tried to explain. You felt sorry, yes, but it was no pity. What you felt was the need to protect him and it took you aback. You knew Daryl needed no protection whatsoever, but still, you felt the urge to guard him against any more harm. And you were totally enraged at his family.

“Yeah, I know what you and your friends think of me.” He grumbled, still glaring you.

You were confused for a second but then realized it might be something his hallucinated Merle had told him. Which meant it was something he thought deep down, and it pained you to think he might believe all of you thought ill of him. You couldn’t speak for everyone, but you knew most of them appreciated the efforts he was doing and valued him. At least you did, and for Carol, he was a hero.

“I don’t know what you think...what Merle told you...but you said it, it’s bullshit.” You gathered enough courage to speak, no matter the angry way he was looking at you was making you uneasy and telling you to fly out of the room.

“I think you’re brave and I’m grateful you are helping us and looking for Sophia. And so is Carol.” You blushed at your words.

Daryl said nothing but his eyes were not that angry anymore, just wary, but you saw he’d blushed too. He said nothing and turned his back to you again and without another world, you left the room.

****

You yawned, getting out of the RV early in the morning. Carol had offered to keep sharing the bed and you had accepted, not only to sleep in a real bed instead of in a sleeping bag but also for the comfort of sleeping next to someone instead of in the loneliness of the tent.

Since the dead started walking the earth, you didn’t enjoy your time alone as much as you used to. And you had gotten used to always have someone not far from you. You felt vulnerable alone in the tent.

You saw Daryl limp out of the house and made his way slowly into his tent, grimacing here and there.

“I feel so bad...” Andrea complained, stopping next to you.

“Come on, it was a mistake, you thought him a walker...” You tried to comfort her. Stumbling around covered in blood he had probably looked like one. “And if he’d been a walker you’d have almost nailed him.” You chuckled softly, wondering when you started to have such a dark sense of humor, but Andrea didn’t seem amused at your words.

“I almost killed him...” She blamed herself.

“But you didn’t, he doesn’t blame you,” Carol assured her.

“I’m going to apologize,” Andrea said before heading towards Daryl’s tent resolutely.

You saw Rick and Shane were looking at the map again and you made your way towards him, eager to start doing something. Turned out you weren’t starting the search for Sophia right away, first you’d do some shooting practice.

You knew it was important, but looking for Sophia should be the priority. Still, you didn’t complain aloud, not wanting to cause an argument.

This time, Andrea and you tried aiming at further and further targets until you couldn’t keep up with her.

“Damn girl, have you been practicing in your sleep or something?” You chuckled softly, amazed at her. You could just hope your aim would be that good someday.

After your training session, you split to look for Sophia again. Shane told you he’d go with Andrea to check some housing area in which he thought Sophia might have hauled up while Rick, Carol and you checked the woods again.

Both places where a bust and you felt your mood going down and down. You felt you weren’t doing enough and you were frustrated, but didn’t know what to do about it. You got into the RV, lying on the bed and intending to finish Glenn’s book, oblivious to any drama that might’ve been going on outside.

You didn’t realize you had fallen asleep on the book until you felt the bed shifting under the weight of Carol. You opened your eyes and realized the sun was already down.

“Ey...” You greeted groggily, shifting to the side of the bed to give Carol more room.

“Didn’t mean to wake you,” Carol said quietly. “Go back to sleep.”

You nodded, yawning. “Have you seen Daryl?” You hadn’t seen him since he went to his tent in the morning, and you wondered if he was doing okay.

“Brought him dinner, he’s doing fine,” Carol told you with a small smile. “Bored. Cranky. But okay.”

“Good...” You whispered half asleep and soon you were dreaming again.

@momc95 @jodiereedus22 @osweetdevilo@sapphire1727@coffeebooksandfandom

I never thought anyone’d like to be tag in any of my stories so thank you! It means the world! <3

[sometimesrosy]

Ok so apparently the 100 is building a castle set w/a fancy staircase. And theres a few small red and yellow flagposts outside w/some christmas like trees. Wtf is going on?!? Lol the first thing that popped into my head when I saw it was the King/Knight and Queen/Princess reference for Bellamy and Clarke. Lol. I have no idea what's going on in this new planet. Or is a ball really happening like everyone is saying? Maybe like a peace conference ball type thing between Eligius and Earthlings? Lol.

OK, I wish y’all would post a link or site or search term when you come yelling about new information so I know where to go look and I’m not just going off second hand information. But I did find the bts pic.

I don’t know if that’s a castle, but the flags are banners and they are norfolk pines, not christmas trees.There does seem to be some pageantry involved with the banners and landscaping, which doesn’t fit either the wilderness or the high tech aesthetic, so it’s something DIFFERENT from what we’ve seen. There’s also topiary on the balcony.

 What I find interesting is the organic details on those stairs and backdrop, and I do not understand why the center of the set is orange while the outside of it is brown, which makes it look fake. So the conclusion I am coming to is that they will add special effects to it to make it also look…idk, more organic? Some sort of vines or lights or alien unusualness.??? There’s a bluescreen at the top, but the top edges are NOT finished and have no detail, especially not like the detailed organic shapes of the railing, which looks sloppy to me and will probably be fixed in post production. Which means to me, again, special effects. Also, there’s no place for anyone to stand near that bluescreen, so it’s just background. Maybe just the two suns, but maybe more. 

TBH, I don’t understand how any of you get Bellarke out of that. 

it’s a BUILDING. It’s worldbuilding, not character arcs. I wouldn’t use this to figure out an emotional narrative. I feel like this fandom wants to make everything about a clue to ships and that isn’t what everything IS. Sometimes a building is about…the setting. It gives us some aesthetic. Some background. Maybe history, mood. Relationships are details that exist WITHIN the world they build, but the background doesn’t tell us about relationships.

To me, with the late timing of that, this to me says alien society, or the hidden part of the Eligius society. Otherwise we would have seen this early on in the filming. But no, this isn’t part of the peaceful society we’ve heard about?? Or it’s a new part of it. I think it will be the strange part of it.

I’m still on the aliens thing. This is what we’ve been told would be happening. Whether that is alien world or alien planet. Eligius has been there about 200 years, and this building seems to have been there a while, right? Or I’m assuming it’s an established place, but it doesn’t look like something a technologically advanced culture post earth apocalypse would build, style wise. It’s slightly organic/gothic…. oh, maybe we’re going SOLARPUNK.

IDK. People’s frame of reference seems to be “prom,” or maybe Cinderella, but I have questions and thoughts about this all.

If it’s a ball or prom that they need a choreographer for, although unless it’s highly stylized group dancing (and why hire a choreographer who does contemporary/broadway numbers instead of a folk dancer or something?) then why hire only FOUR dancers for it?

Four dancers + choreographer makes me think more along the lines of performance, meeting, presentation of characters who are utilizing the dance to tell part of the story.

The choreographer and many of the dancers seem to have a strange element to their work. The choreographer has a straight up WEIRD alien like dance number on her website, one of the dancers dances off the ground. One of them DOES have a ball number in OUAT though. Yes I googled the dancers and choreographer.

Why is dance part of the story when it never has been before? That makes it strange to this kind of storytelling, which fits, as we’re on an alien planet.

Why is it introduced so late in the season? Again it is another unusual thing that our heroes haven’t seen yet. That makes it, to me, part of a revelation of story. Not actually about Bellarke, but about the planet, the alienness, the mystery of what happened to eligius 4, and the main plot and possible big bad.

This set is also introduced late in the season at the same time as choreographer, so the dancing and set seem to be connected. 

Perhaps there is a fairy tale element, or a dream element. They HAVE brought in fairy tales before, as early as the linctavia beauty and the beast storyline. BUT JR has referenced all movies and books that have an element of unreality, altered perception/time/reality, possible hallucination, dream or vision, so I find that just as likely as a ball. More likely. Do fairy tales have to be about princesses and balls? No. They don’t. Often they are about the deep dark woods, mystery, danger and magic. Even Disney does that. Fairy tale =/= romance.

What is with that weird orange color? At first I thought it was a sheet of plastic, but upon close viewing, there is a lot of textural and tonal detail IN the orange. However, the orange makes it look fake. Therefore I think it is one layer of what eventually will be some sort of digital effect. Maybe it’s like layers in a painting. Maybe that orange color is supposed to give the impression that the castle is GLOWING. ohhh. that would make sense.

Ok. The orange part of the castle kind of centers on that pretty organic archway with the kind of half mandala in it, that looks like a stained glass window, but it is not a perfect mandala or circle and the center of it is DEFINITELY organic like a tree root or octopus. AND the stone around it kind of warps like it is wrinkled or there is something growing under it. That shape is echoed in the bannister. Top edge of the castle also shows this wrinkle/warping, which is maybe why I thought it was a sheet of plastic at first. It’s not. It was designed to look like something organic, but in stone. where we can SEE the stone building blocks.

The castle is human sized. The steps are human sized so are the doors. This is a building for humanoids. However there are super tall archways that are NOT human sized. Why build an archway that tall when the others are human height?

A thing growing through a stone castle is not humanoid. 

A thing growing through a stone castle and then echoed in the architecture of said castle is not an enemy, but something that is honored or worshipped or followed. 

You know how Avatar (the movie with blue people) had that mother tree that was, like, the center of life and spirit?

Binch. If the alien on this planet is THE ACTUAL PLANET someone needs to come over here and do an exorcism to get Jason Rothenberg out of my head because I wrote this in a novel 12 years ago, which was ALSO about cryo sleep, which was part of how they got to the new planet to colonize it, which just so y’all know, I suggested as a way to be saved from praimfaya before season 4 started. BEFORE. In january. Also, my current series based on the same universe as that space colony one is called The Mandala Series. The first one was The Mythos Series. That thing in the center looks like a mandala. 

If the alien beings on this planet are actually part of the planet, or a non human entity, AND we get choreography that is weird and dancers that can dance while hanging in space off of poles or ropes or vines or tentacles, then I suggest that there is a hybrid human/alien element, and the dancers will represent that new hybrid. Again, another idea from my novel. I might just be too deep into my novel to separate, and am reading into it, but that is how I came up with cryo theory and it turns out I was right. 

JR is in my head. 

Honestly, I don’t know how you guy come up with Bellarke and commence freaking out. I come up with living alien planets and hybrid alien/humans and commence freaking out. No offense, but my idea is more interesting than a ball. I mean. Maybe it’s a ball. That would be…. fun. 

[acrossthenewdivide]

I used to write all the time.

My mind was overflowing with ideas so frequently that I couldn't help but stop whatever I was doing and write - or daydream until I could write it down.

Not everything was perfect. In fact, it's been a journey watching my writing improve over the years. Sometimes it was just random scenes and characters, eventually evolving to full storylines and character development.

Then I went to grad school. And life ensued. I did well for the first few years, then I had personal issues. Grad school got hard, my S/O went through several job losses and things got tough. I lost any will to write...or read for that matter, and as someone who usually reads multiple books a month, that meant something.

I lost myself. I lost myself in trying to keep our little family together and finish my doctorate. People say relationships are 50/50 but that's a lie. Sometimes you have to be 100% and even more, and that was what I did for years, and while it saved my marriage, it killed a part of me.

I love my person and wouldn't change what we went through, because it brought us to where we are now, but there is strength and healing in admitting how I felt during that time. Admitting that a part of me died in those years.

After all that, after settling into a new city, new jobs, new everything, it's taken 6 months but I've started reading again. My favorite series that brought me comfort in a dark place once, and is now igniting that passion to write again.

After years of cringing at a blank sheet of paper, of broken attempts at storylines and character development, I want to write again. I want to build a world and it's inhabitants. Storylines that make people as invested as I have been invested in others.

It's been a hard road; one paved with late night silent tears and anxiety. But also one filled with lessons; with a strength I didn't know I had. With a knowledge that I can endure and overcome adversity to preserve my marriage and my life, even at a cost. And I'm ready to project that back into my writing.

This is the beginning. A new start. No matter what tomorrow brings, we can only live today. Write today. And I intend to.

To all of you struggling, I feel you and you have my undying support. If you need to talk, I am here. Please message me. And if you feel lost, trust me when I tell you that you will find your way again. It may be dark, and it will be difficult and long, but piece by piece, it will come back.

If you've read this long, thank you. And I hope this gave you hope, or at least an interesting read (trying to get back into writing, remember? :)).

Thank you all, and keep on keeping on y'all.

[creativeashproductions]

The Council // Derek Hale

Summary: When your parents split up you and Scott got split up also. For good reason too, you moved to San Fransisco with your father Agent Rafe McCall while Scott stayed with you mother. Having not seen them since you left at age five…well everyone’s in for surprises all around.

Characters: young!Derek Hale x McCall!Reader, Scott McCall, Rafe McCall, Melissa McCall, Stiles Stilinski and Alan Deaton

Words: 4248

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Wolf or the characters in any way, shape or form. I don’t know any gifs, or images either. All I own is the storyline of the reader.

Warnings: Swearing, blood, vampires, smut and family problems.

Author: Caitsy

A/N: I loved this request because I got to bring in some factors from the Night World book series by L.J. Smith. I was obsessed with them growing up and I had to incorporate something into this.

Master List

Prompt List

ASK US A QUESTION LIST

Not many people would remember you given the massive glow up you had since you last permanently lived in Beacon Hills. Your older brother hadn’t seen you in forever and you barely kept in contact since your freshmen year of high school. It was for the greater good given the laws in your world that was the reason behind the fractured marriage between your parents.

Your mom and brother were humans whereas your father was a vampire since he was a young child. Dad stuck around to keep an eye on both Scott and you to see if either of you would inherit his vampirism. When Scott turned ten, the latest the transformation would began for a born vampire, he didn’t transform whereas you tended to have a love of red juice and you bite another five year old.

“Dad do we really have to go to Beacon Hills?” You whined feeling your fangs dig into your lips. When you weren’t with humans you always let your vampiric side out.

“You attacked a student Y/N!” Your Dad, Rafe, exclaimed pointing his honey gold eyes on your form with specks of red in the gold.

“I didn’t mean to! They were doing blood testing!” You shouted back.

“You said you had control!”

“More control than your dick! Yeah I know you cheated on Mom.” You snapped hissing before his hand raised high in the air, “You gonna hit me? You really want to do that?”

With a huff he dropped his hand to the bag packed on the ground before leaning against the wall.


“I left your mother to protect them.”


“You tore me away from my mother!” You screamed, “I don’t even talk to Scott!”

“The Vampiric Council would have charged me with breaking one of the laws Y/N. I’ve explained this to you.”


“They didn’t know we’re vampires!” You shouted back burning with hatred for the man that took away your family, “We could have kept living there!”


“You needed to learn control.” Dad returned shoving your own suitcase to you, “We’re moving to Beacon Hills for the rest of the semester. Do you understand?”

You shrieked at him before grabbing the near weightless bag to join the others you had noticed in the stupid SUV your Dad drove. Your house was barren, little food was needed with your diet, but that didn’t mean anything. You had lived there since the custody battle when you were six and hadn’t ever really been back to Beacon Hills.

“It will be fine. Just don’t reveal yourself.” Your Dad said turning to catch your eye, “For god sake revert to human!”

The trip from San Francisco to your hometown was filled with anger before the car was pulled over in the next town over near the woods. You resigned yourself to hunting with your father before racing off at top speed fighting a good size deer. You took your anger out on it keep the minimal amount of blood off your clothing.

You were waiting in the car wiping the blood from the corners of your mouth before leaning back when you father climbed back in. As per usual he was impeccably dressed with no evidence of what had just transpired.

“We hunt in the next town.” Dad firmly said, “Animals. Humans in a different town only if you make them forget.”

“Whatever.” You grunted as he pulled up to the house he had used after Mom kicked him out. You trailed up the doors behind him slipping inside taking a look everywhere.

The old furniture was uncovered with the sheets folded nicely on the chairs and couches. He motioned towards the stairs where a huge loft was situated once you reached the top of the stairs. It was walled off from the rest of the house for privacy, your name was placed on the door.

“Trying to manipulate my feelings?” You asked knowing he would hear even if you whispered.

“You can have the loft. I’ll take the downstairs bedroom.” Dad returned beginning to make some food.


“So essentially I have a whole floor to myself?” You questioned.

“I renovated the second bedroom into an office down here.” Dad sighed before he continued, “You have school tomorrow and do not assault anyone.”



“Can I go see Scott?” You asked coming into the kitchen.

“No.”

“But he’s my br-“

“I know he is. He’s also human like your mother.”



“Why couldn’t you just change Mom? We could be a family.”

“The Vampiric Council forbids that. How many times do I have to tell you before you understand that?” Dad shouted turning to you, “I’m sick of the attitude you put up. I thought tooth and nail to have you live with me. I didn’t want your mother to be killed because I fell in love with a human. I had to leave when you showed signs of being a vampire and your brother didn’t.”

“Everything you do is to protect me.” You sighed collapsing into a chair, “You do realize that Beacon Hills High School is small enough I will eventually bump into Scott or his friends. I do have similarities with him.”

“You’ll just walk away from him.” Dad returned, “Besides he’s not the sharpest fang in the mouth.”

“That’s your son.”

“My human son with the brain power equivalent to a AA battery. Vampires have a faster and higher intelligence than a human.”

“Why aren’t you smart then?”

“Why did I have to have the annoying child.” Dad groaned looking up at the sky. You hummed kicking your feet up onto the table. Within seconds he shoved your feet off the table with a stern expression.

“Fine. I’ll go get school supplies.” You grumbled stretching to loosen up your muscles.

“Take the car.”

“But I want to run-“

“Take the car. You’re in town with a small population.” Dad huffed, “Be home in two hours or your grounded.”

You stomped out to the SUV still sitting in your driveway, you kept quiet as you drove just out of his hearing range. You already had a plan by driving into the outskirts of town to hide the vehicle in the woods before running towards the local store.


“I’m telling you! You should ask Kira out for real.”



“It’s too soon right?”

“Dude, Allison would want you to be happy. After everything that happened last semester you deserve happiness. Isaac and Allison had something going-“

“Wait what?”  The other boy gasped, “They were together?! How? When? Didn’t she shoot arrows at him?! I thought it was nothing!”


“Scott, love does crazy things.”

You froze hearing the name coming from the first boy that could mean that he was your brother. There couldn’t be that many Scott’s in Beacon Hills even with the population amount. You peeked through the aisle to see that they were looking at pens with a few notebooks in hand. It was hard to tell if the russet skinned boy was your brother from the back but when he turned his face and his jawline came into view you knew.

“Scott?” You whispered seeing the boy tense before gazing around. You dropped the notebook before taking off towards the door.


“Hey!” The first boy yelled as the items in their hands dropped to the ground. The pounding of footsteps were spaced far enough away.

You swiftly turned into an alleyway before jumping the wall with the help of your enhanced strength and speed. You rolled as you hit the ground before using the darkness as a cover to use your full speed. By the time they were climbing the wall you had already taken off.

“Idiot!” You shouted at yourself, “You wanted to meet him so why did I run?!”

You pulled up to a different store to grab the essentials and head home to the house you viewed as just a house you slept in. It wasn’t home and if you were honest nothing was home other than the place you were first raised in.

“Did you get everything?” Dad asked placing a case file down on the table. You saw the name as the Sheriff of the town. Before you could see more he closed the file.


“Yeah.”

“You smell anxious.”

“The whole new school and hiding my scent is a little difficult.” You admitted looking down at your fingers.

“You’d hid your scent before. Besides it Beacon Hills, there’s nothing supernatural about the town at all.” Dad weakly smiled at you, “Eat then go to bed.”

“Okay.”

“I can do this.” You deeply sighed dancing on the balls of your feet. You were in your favourite outfit to help boost your confidence.

The school alone was intimidating without adding the whole vampire side into it and going to the same school as your brother. You promised yourself you wouldn’t run away from him again but it was like your instincts told you to haul ass away.

“Miss McCall I presume?” The Principle asked, “I’m Principle Thomas.”

“I actually know where the classrooms are.” You admitted, “I studies the map because I was nervous.”


“I see your ahead of the game.” Principle Thomas nodded before motioning you to go to class, “If you need any help just let me know.”

“Okay.” You nodded before stepping into the first class of the day.


“Class this is the new student Y/N McCall. I won’t embarrass you, I placed a syllabus on the table for you to catch up on.” The teacher said before turning back to the board.

You turned your head when you felt the eyes of someone on you. You caught the smell of the unknown boy from last night before turning forward. It seemed you were right about mixed classes for AP students. You shifted uncomfortably until the bell rang and you quickly left.

“Y/N?”

“Aw fuck.” You moaned turning to see Scott standing shocked, “Hey buddy, my bro. How you doing?”

“What the hell.” Stiles numbly spoke head moving between Scott and you, “This is your sister?”


“Yeah.” Scott breathed blinking before his scent blasted you face first. You gasped feeling your eyes burn through the contact lenses. You closed them tight to stumble into the free room to the side of you, “Are you okay?”



“Holy fuck my brother is a werewolf.” You gasped collapsing onto a desk in absolute shock.

“What? Werewolf? Those don’t exist…pfft.” Stiles shakily spoke with a nervous chuckle.


“Oh shut up.” You seethed before meeting Scott’s eyes, “You were human when I last saw you.”

“You didn’t have warm yellow eyes!” Scott exclaimed back, “They were brown like mine.”



“I’m a vampire.”

“What.” Stiles stated scanning your body.

“When?” Scott quietly asked stumbling when your body gave up on the human disguise. Your fangs elongated while your skin paled a hint just as your heartbeat began it’s terribly slow beat.

Your heart only beat a few times per minute given you got most of your unnecessary oxygen from the little breathing you needed and blood. Your scent was of blood and death when you weren’t hiding it.

“Since I was five technically.” You quietly returned, “It’s why Dad moved.”

“He’s a vampire?!” Scott gasped.


“Does that mean your half werewolf and half vampire?” Stiles questioned his best friend.

“No.” You shook your head for Scott, “That’s why Scott stayed with Mom. Dad and Mom stayed together for different reasons. Mom wanted to make it work while Dad just stayed to see which one of us would turn. It’s genetic and skipped you.”

Scott’s jaw dropped in absolute shock.

“That’s why you bit that kid!” Scott gasped, “The hissing and when Dad caught you sucking the raw meat!”

“Ew.” Stiles gagged, “You have problems.”

“You wanna dance little boy.”

“Nope. I am fine.” Stiles denied back up a few steps, “However you guys may have problems. Werewolves and vampires are enemies.”

“This ain’t Twilight.” You snorted shaking your head, “I’m part of the Dark World. We have many different creatures from the most common vampires, witches and werewolves to the more uncommon banshees, kitsunes, and other were-creatures.”

“Why did you move here?”



“I kind of assaulted someone in San Francisco?” You hesitated on speaking, “It’s why the red dots in my eyes are brighter than usual. Human blood makes our eyes red while animal blood causes yellow. Dad and I have a animal diet with blood bags for added strength.”

“I’m in a state of shock.” Stiles gasped looking at you. He shook his head closing his eyes before turning to look at a poster on the wall, “Well I can read. I have ten fingers…well this is not a dream.”

You shot an odd look at him before shaking your head once more. Dad had mentioned in passing the little incident where a shadow thrust a sword into his shoulder. Fun times when he comes back with a still healing stab wound. Something about it being a demon warrior with an extended period of healing.

“Why didn’t you come back with Dad?”



“I had a meet up with my mentor.”

“You have a vampire mentor?” Stiles gasped blinking at your words. Once more you shot him an odd expression.


“No. I had college mentorship.”

“Oh.” Stiles spoke with a weird sadness you were both intrigued and nervous upon seeing it.

“We’re practicing for tryouts later this week if you want to stop by and watch.” Scott offered shifting back and forth on his feet.

“One moment.” You mumbled moving towards a mirror on the back of the door. You shoved your bag’s contents around until you found the small hard box you always had. Grabbing the container from in the small box you inserted two new brown contacts.

“You can’t change them back?” Scott questioned stepping closer.


“No. The contacts usually take four hours to break down before I need to replace them.” You disclosed returning the box back in your bag, “I’ve barely had them in for two hours and they melted. It’s like the minute I recognized you as a supernatural the shock vaporized them.”

“He’s an True Alpha.” Stiles mused carefully. His eyes moving swiftly in the air as he saw a painting being created that only he could see.

“A True Alpha?” You mouthed to yourself just barely even speaking it.

“Deaton told me a True Alpha is the rarest form of alphas-“

“Appears only once every one hundred years!” Stiles piped up with a proud expression.

“My Alpha status can only be taken by one my own betas.” Scott finished with a small smile on his face.

“Deaton? As in Alan Deaton who babysat us for an hour?” You marvelled thinking back to when he had selflessly volunteered to look after you when your bunny had to be put to sleep and your parents had a marriage therapy session. That act of kindness bought Scott over to look up to Deaton.

“He’s something.” Stiles slowly whistled nodding to himself, “Odd guy.”

When Scott mentioned in passing that they were heading to Mexico to find their other friend before inviting you over for supper. It was odd to casually drop the rescue mission before being serious about going to your childhood home. 
“Do I look okay?” You urgently asked your brother just a block from your place.

“You look fine. It’s mom.” Scott snorted rolling his eyes, “She’ll be ecstatic to see you even if you only had a leg and a pinky finger.”

“I haven’t seen her in person for years Scott!”

“Eleven years to be exact.” Scott interrupted your frantic mutterings as he dragged you to the doorway, “Besides if Dad went back to San Fransisco for a meeting he won’t know.”

“I’m terrified.” You whimpered as the door slowly opened and the scent of meat moved through the house, “Whoa. Is that like raw meat?”



“I told her you liked rare meat.” Scott awkwardly smiled as he led you into the dining room.

The tears immediately rushed to your face when you saw your mother humming as she finished placing the plate of vegetables on the table. Your gasp taking in the curly dark hair you would vividly remember was the reason her head snapped up. You didn’t know who moved first but in the next minute you were completely wrapped up in her arms.

“Oh baby.” She sobbed into your hair. It was the first time in a long time that you had been so close with a human and not wanting to taste their swee…better not finish that.

“Mom.” You sighed cuddling closer to her warmth.


“I missed you.” She mumbled pulling  back to look at you, “You’re eyes have changed.”

“I have something to tell you.” You sighed looking up at her, “Scott told me that you knew he’s a werewolf.”

“How do you know he’s a werewolf?” Mom questioned confused.

“Because I’m part of the supernatural.” You answered with a sheepish expression. Her expression changed dramatically when it settled into her mind.

“I’m sorry. What?”



“I’m a vampire.” You whispered turning your back to take the contacts out. When you turned back she gasped at your yellow and red spotted eyes.

“When did this happen?” She demanded stepping closer.

“Dad didn’t tell you but he’s a born vampire.” You admitted as she collapsed into a chair behind her. Scott shuffled to crouch beside her in her time of grief, “I inherited the vampiric gene but it wasn’t activated until I was five. That’s why he stuck around despite your demanding that he leave.”

“My ex-husband is a vampire and I never knew.”

“It was more protecting you than anything. It’s against the Vampiric laws to tell a human, mate with a human and conceive with a human. Dad left to protect you and Scott so he had to take me.”

“I didn’t get to see you because you’re a vampire?” Mom cried out pushing her face into her hands as her shoulders shuddered with each sob.

“I’m sorry. If I had the choice I would change into a human but there’s no spell or cure that could change that.”

“I want to talk to your father.”

“He can’t find out that you know what we are. I’m already in trouble for being the reason we had to leave San Fransisco temporarily.”

“Why?”

“I kinda assaulted a person there because I haven’t learnt full control yet.” You shyly replied looking up in anticipation for the scared expression. It wasn’t there, instead your mom had a look of both concern and sadness.

“We can teach you control.” Scott said grabbed your hand, “Mom could many grab a few blood bags and I’m sure the pack wouldn’t protest letting you feed off us.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.” You whispered looking up through your lashes, “It would make me feel weird to drink your blood.”

“What about Stiles?”

You couldn’t deny the attraction you felt to the young man you had all rescued in Mexico albeit not noticing the looks the pack were giving the man. His blood appealed but there was something glittery that appeared between your two when you focused on it. You swore you could even sense his emotions at times.

He seemed attracted to you too.

“Movie?” Derek asked with a small smile. You nodded with a grin using the empty house to your advantage.

“What should we watch?” You asked kneeling on the couch in your house.

“The Day After Tomorrow?” Derek asked looking up, “It just came out on DVD.”

“Derek that came out in 2004.” You trailed off blinking at him, “It’s 2012.”

His jaw dropped in shock before looking down at your phone situated in the middle of you two. He grabbed it to see the date and time on it before dropping it to scoot to the back of the couch.

“How am I still sixteen then?!” Derek exclaimed breathing quickly.

“I don’t know.” You admitted.

It was quiet as Derek struggled to process it and it that moment he lunged to kiss you so he could finally focus on something. You slowly moved your lips against his as his hands dipped into your hair and yours settled on his waist. You lunged backwards when your eyes burnt through the contacts again and your fangs extended.

“Did I do something wrong?!” Derek frantically asked moving his hands towards you before moving them back to freak out more.

“No…get away.” You groaned leaning down digging your nails into your thighs.

“Are you thirsty?” Derek slowly asked even if he already knew the answer already, “Here.”

The scent of blood filled the room more as you looked over at the blood welling up from the cut on his wrist. Derek’s claws had blood dripping off his index finger. You were salivating before you lunged to drink it. That was when you realized he was your soulmate.

You’re blood sang in your veins while you finished drinking to move your lips onto his again. It was rushed, passionate and a little rough if you admitted to the point you both had fallen off the couch onto the ground.

His hand slipped into your shirt while you pushed his sweats down his legs and just one glance informed you he had in fact gone commando. It picked up dangerously at that point, his claws scrapped at your skin while your fangs felt scratches on his neck. The blood that oozed from them didn’t deter you from other priorities. Especially when he had removed every single item of clothing from your body.

“Do you...can you still have...um...do we need a.” Derek huffed trying to find the words.

“I’m a born vamp Derek. I can still have kids so please grab a rubber.” You moaned as his hand made quick work of bringing you to the edge.

“I’ve never done this.” Derek admitted, “Not this way.”

“Just please!” You whimpered as he pulled away to search his backpack he had dragged into your house.

He mumbled as he struggled to find the metallic blue square packet he had blushed buying earlier today. He just a had a feeling he should have some on hand as if he had known this would happen.

“Whoa.” You both said together as double the amount of pleasure and emotion flooded your bodies. It was intense enough to push you over the edge and screaming his name. Your eyes flashed bright as the contacts melted away once more.

“Holy shit!” Derek yelled as he collapsed on top of you, “I-I’m sorry it was wasn’t long.”

“It’s because of our bond.” You sighed cuddling closer to him on the warm ground. Derek froze as he pulled back.

“What?”

“We’re soulmates.” You huffed trailing one finger nail over his pecs, “We have a silver string connecting us and if we practiced we could see it. When I feed off you we can hear each other in our own minds.”

“Show me.” Derek mumbled leaning back to re cut his wrist before shoving it towards you. You both grabbed some clothing before you shuffled closer.

Taking his wrist to your mouth you focused on the image of you splayed on the ground in the throes of passion. Imagining how the masterpiece of you two making love in the living room was. He moaned at the image in his mind and the warmth that flooded when your minds connected.

You both could feel the love you shared together and the giddy feeling of discovering the magic of the soulmate bond. You were so wrapped into each other you didn’t hear the door open or close, hell you couldn’t even smell the newcomers. All you knew was you were hungry again,

“Ew!” Stiles gagged when he stormed into the house with Scott. You moaned not caring until Derek slowly pushed you off.

“I’m still thirsty.” You whimpered rocking back and forth.

“What about Stiles?” Derek questioned looking over at Stiles. His eyes huge and paling quickly before taking a deep breathe.

“No.” You quickly spoke shaking your head.


“Why not?!” Stiles snapped.

“You don’t smell…appetizing.” You grimaced as Stiles’ eyes grew offended more by the minute.

“I’m not attractive to gay guys and vampires?!”

“Here.” Scott interrupted cutting open his wrist to pour into a recently grabbed glass and a straw.

You quickly slurped it out of the cup completely ignoring the thud in the general direction of Stiles. A snort and sigh from the other two in the room confirmed it was in fact the only human in the room that had fainted. You wiped your chin of the blood before settling back into the couch.

In your moment of self satisfaction Deaton walked into the house holding a frown and a notebook.

“I’m afraid I have bad news.” Deaton announced looking at Derek on the couch.

“What?” Derek questioned.

“I’ve asked others, looked into every book and nothing can reverse the effects of the spell.”

“He’s stuck like a teenager?” Stiles groaned sitting up with the help of Scott.

“Yes.”

“That’s good right?” You inquired glancing at the druid.

“How is that good?!” Stiles exclaimed.


“If he’s this age it isn’t illegal to be with him.” You simply spoke, “He is my soulmate after all.”

Everyone’s jaw dropped in shock while Deaton didn’t bat any eye at your announcement, he seemed to see things happen before everyone knew.

Forever Tag List

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Teen Wolf Tag List

@kitschkylo @zachmantle @30inlovewiththecoco1 @kris-nic0le @faypol​

[brokenversesblog]

Brokenverse: the Storyline

I just realized it was a little weird to start introducing characters before giving the storyline- the storyline is seen in the character sheets, but not in a 3rd person perspective where everything is brought out.

~~

Brokenverse is just what this story is called- it’s more of an alteration of the storylines in multiple AUs rather than it being one actual AU with new versions of characters (aside from Crack and his AU being introduced, but Brokenverse isn’t always focused on Crack anyways.)

This story starts with Nightmare, after many years of him being corrupted. Nightmare himself is over 500 years old, and was corrupted in his childhood, so this really is a long time to be a goopy mess.

The domino effect of chaos starts with our lovely Dust, who plays a trick on Fell by bowling him over. This causes Fell to accidentally knock over a table of glasses. Dust acted innocent, and Fell acted brash, so naturally Nightmare was irritated. Nightmare initially shows self control, stepping outside to calm down, and then messes everything up when he attacks Ink.

Ink, who had decided that right there, at that very moment, in front of a pissed off Nightmare, was a grand place to be, started pestering and poking Nightmare. This is what caused Nightmare to attack Ink.

Ink put up no fight, and Nightmare got the better hand of him and smacked Ink’s skull into the ground, shattering part of it. Ink fell unconscious, and would only wake up a week later.

Dream, Ink’s good friend and fellow Star Sans, sensed Nightmare’s and Ink’s presences. He teleported over just in time to see Nightmare shatter Ink’s skull. Understandably, and foolishly, Dream tried to avenge his friend, only ending up in the same state as who he tried to protect. Nightmare fragmented Dream’s soul during the fight, though in a moment of sudden sentiment he kept the parts he ripped away.

Nightmare, having defeated both, dragged them into a lesser known AU, hoping that when they came to, they’d spend too much time trying to figure out where they were that they’d forget to look out for Nightmare. However, this lesser known AU happened to be the very AU of Ink’s friend, a tall Sans by the name of Crack.

Ink and Dream, unconscious on the ground, were luckily found a few hours later by Crack, a shut-in, introverted babysitter who was convinced to actually get out of the house to take kids to the park. Crack, recognizing Ink, took both of them back to his apartment and attempted to nurse them back into health. Dream and Ink revive a week later under Crack’s care.

Dream, as we know now, wakes up with mild homicidal tendencies and a warped view of justice, and Ink as an amnesiac, colorblind mess that needs to borrow souls. Ink, with no memory of how he got there, can still recognize emotions he feels when looking at people. This is why, when he gets his first glimpse at Dream, now threatening and creepy, Ink still considers him a friend. Ink also recognizes Crack as a friend.

Ink coins the nickname “Fragment” for Dream, and, offended, Fragment retaliates by calling Ink “Broken,” which was, coincidentally, the nickname Broken had already given himself.

Fragment, with his memory intact and impressively sharp, starts hunting down Nightmare, with a desperate need for revenge. He finally finds Nightmare and fights him, to Nightmare’s surprise. Fragment is very clearly not the brother he once was anymore. Nightmare, horrified by the thought of being scared of his brother, flees.

Nightmare changes back into his uncorrupted form, and meets Cross, who is actually concerned by Ink’s lack of visiting his empty AU. Cross doesn’t know that Ink was unconscious, or that he is now Broken. As Nightmare explains this, Cross and him unofficially and accidentally form a friendship. Cross, poking fun at Nightmare, starts calling him “Fracture.” Fracture, not wanting to be mean to his only friend, gives Cross a fitting nickname: “Code.”

Fracture and Code create a house out of borrowed code. Code moves the house constantly to help Fracture avoid Fragment and Broken (who they still know as Dream and Ink.)

Meanwhile, it becomes evident to Crack that Fragment and Broken have nowhere else to stay than with him, and his apartment is not big enough to support two new inhabitants as well as still having a kid room. Crack decides to get a big house, on the pretense that Fragment and Broken pull their part on bills. They somehow manage this.

The path of the story splits into many endings here, depending on how the characters behave. If Fracture is able to find a place so hidden that Fragment won’t ever find him, Fragment will either eventually calm down or go berserk trying to find him. If Broken finds his paints and brush, he can make Fragment a temporary, makeshift soul piece so Fragment can get back to his senses and they can convince Fracture to give his soul back. Some endings are rather quick, while in others years pass by before a conclusion is reached.

[sambart93]

Messiah: Polar Night [Review]

I got to see this movie two times in two days! Monday and Tuesday -- I shouldn’t say ‘got to’ because I didn’t enjoy it! Messiah, in true Messiah style, hurt all the feels we fangirls have once again. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

Official Site here Official Twitter here Trailer here and here

NON-SPOILER REVIEW Overall: Messiah, in true Messiah style, did what it does best: Hurting our feelings and the characters feelings. This was a very interesting movie, and having Amane and Misu as the center story was amazing! It’s a prequel to Akatsuki so gives us more introduction to the three new cadets. While it does rip your heart out in the end, there are quite a lot of funny moment which I thoroughly enjoyed. I am, though, not happy with how they treated and extended Mamiya’s story line. I just feel like they’re making him out to be more evil than originally perceived but that’s me being Mamiya bias. Thanks for breaking my heart once again Messiah! Why do I continue to stay with this abusive boyfriend?! Rating: 7/10

---

Now for the spoilers!! MWAHAHAHAHA So be warned; I’m going all out!

*Disclaimer: I do find Messiah difficult to understand at times, so if I get anything wrong, let me know, and don’t take my story 100% as the truth xD

I’ll try and keep in order of how the scenes happened and try to keep chronological.

The opening has this water effect that’s super, super pretty!! But OMG the foreshadowing even in the opening! I didn’t realise until the second time around just how much the opening credits like foreshadows the shit that goes down towards the end. And attention to detail in the opening too is amazing! 

I love how it starts with Misu waking up from a nightmare (pretty close up shot) and then we immediately see that Amane is in his bed! Of course my Bl-poisoned brain was like ‘that bed is big enough for both of them! Let them sleep together!’ But of course, Misu is just being a gentleman and logical and a nice friend so let Amane have the whole bed.

The opening credits is so sad because Amane up and LEAVES Misu! And he just leaves a note ‘三栖さん、今までありがとうございます 周’ so I was straight away up and crying! Amane!!! Don’t LEAVE Misu!

The next scene I also really love. It shows Misu working out and being all sweaty and doing these awesome movies. I love Misu okay -- BIG massive warning: I love Misu! Okay! So I am going to flail about him a lot. Good? Good!

We see Misu joining a new police force under the command of Shikura and when I noticed that the second in command is freaking NAKAMURA SEIJIROU!!!!! I FREAKED OUT!! TWO TOKIENTA* BOYS ARE IN THIS!!! I fangirled so hard! I really liked Nakamura’s character in this. But with this film being a prequel, I was immediately wondering ‘well why wasn’t he in the stage Akatsuki?’ but by the end of the film they explained why he wasn’t in the stage.

In this new group there’s obviously Amane Gwen (Guen) Shougo and I giggled so hard at Misu's reaction when Amane is introduced himself. Misu’s reaction was EXACTLY the same as my reaction when he was introduced in Akatsuki. me and Misu are clearly soulmates. 

Of course, Amane knows Misu is an (ex?)terrorist so doesn’t trust him at all, so Nakamura is like ‘well lets do some training and fight it out’. OF COURSE Misu kicks everyone’s butts! Seeing Amane all bloody after fighting Misu was actually pretty sexy. The moves they did too were impressive. And then we got Misu and Nakamura fight which was even more badass -- but there is a dodgy ‘trying to be slow-mo but very obviously not slow-mo’ shot.

And then we finally get to Sakura and we have the introduction of the new guys: Miike, Kugure and Yuuki. Miike being a fucking brat straight away, ugh but he’s an intelligent one -_- and they’ve been given a mission by Ichijima to find out why there’s been so many bombs around Tokyo recently, who it is and to decide and find out where the next one(s) will be. Naturally Yuuki and Kugure do and they’re told but Miike gets bored easily and is like ‘lets have some tea time!’ and also leaves the room very quickly -- he’s taken away by the sound of a violin.

While the new cadets are doing this, Shirasaki is in his room, sitting in silence, absolutely torn. His phone rings and he dreads picking it up and keeps getting on Ichijima’s case ‘do you have any news on Kaito?’, to which Ichijima always says ‘あなたが知るはず淮斗くんの情報がない / There’s no news on Kaito that you need to know’ (I wish I could remember the exact quote, it was a good line)’ which pisses off Shirazaki and ultimately he makes the decision to run away from Sakura and find him himself. But in reality, Ichijima knows jack shit about both Kaitou’s disappearance AND about what happened to Mamiya because the high-ups are refusing to trust and tell Sakura anything, and are in fact, deciding to give all the information to the organisation Misu is now a part off. So naturally Ichijima is pissed he’s not being told stuff, but keeps calm around the cadets.

I still don’t like Ichijima and I’m annoyed he’s back (give me back Goumoto Naoya and Kamikita NOW!) but I get why he does what he does and he’s good at what he does. But I’ve just never trusted him -- ESPECIALLY in Akatsuki when he was the main suspect for everything bad that happened in that storyline. I don’t trust him; never have, never will. I think his ‘leg click and fight’ fighting is badass though and I do like the actor just... thanks but no thanks Ichijima. ANYWAY! Back to the movie!

Eventually the two allumni of Sakura track down and find Amane, three times today, and tell him that he should join Sakura and that it’s his fate to join them. Every time he replies ‘I’m never going to join because those outfits are awfuk’. But eventually, in order to help Misu out and in order to stop the next bombing, he decides to go to Church and help them out. Once he’s there Ichijima says the cadets are free to attempt to beat Amane in a fight but naturally he woops all the new cadets’ asses, commenting that ‘I remember old Sakura being much better’. He ends up trying to attack Ichijima but in true Sakura style, Ichijima stops him.

Before he gets taken to Church though, he goes to the allumnis onsen/public bathhouse -- yes they’ve upgraded from a barbers to a public bathhouse -- and he has a public bath with Yuuki and Kugure -- it’s fucking hilarious! He’s like  ‘ -____- Why do I have to take a bath? Just take me to Church already!’ xD

With Shirasaki gone; Eiri and Haku join in on finding the pattern between the bombs, predicting when the next one is, figuring out what the hell the Mamiya report is, and finding and stopping Shirasaki.

Thanks to the cadets scouring the security cameras around Tokyo, they find Shirasaki with Misu. Misu gives him the directions to Hopporengo while Shirasaki hands over the Mamiya Report which is a music sheet with a hidden code in it.

Shirasaki, obviously, gets found by Sakura, and has a knife pinned against his throat from Kuroko who doesn’t want to kill him but threatens to.

There’s a super funny scene when Amane comes in to help Eiri and Haku and immediately Haku sits down (his computer desk filled with wrappers and candy) and offers some to Eiri, who immediately replies ‘ / I don’t need any’ and then he offer Amane who replies exactly the same. ALSO! Freaking Haku’s keyboard is BENT which I found hilarious!

Also the password to cracking the Mamiya code was ‘Messiah without G String’ which made me laugh SO hard but also the grammar-nazi in my was like ‘THE!!!!’ This is where Ichijima literally explains Mamiya’s entire life story and I can’t quite decide which way the story went: *UPDATED

A. Mamiya was brought up to be able to pass messages onto the rest of his terrorist group via the melody he played on his violen.

OR

B. He was trained to give messages via his violin and he didn’t realise he had been under Tstutsumi’s command and didn’t realise the manipulation until Hagane and Eiri/Haku’s mission that he’d been manipulated and by that time he’d already gotten in too deep.

Especially because they found the Mamiya report information in a capsule in his stomach during the autopsy and it had been swallowed 4 hours before he was killed. Also, Ariga mentions that Mamiya’d been playing the violin more frequently towards the end of Haku/Eiri’s mission -- I guess this was when he figured he’d been manipulated to send messages this way.

Swear to god if it’s route A then I’m going to be pissed. he is NOT the bad guy here!

Anyway...

So they finally find where the next omb has been placed and obviously Hopporengo are guarding it so Amane, Amane, Misu, Yuuki, Suwabe go in; either to the control center, or to kill the terrorists, or (for Misu and Suwabe) to get to the bomb and get rid of it. Of course it doesn’t go according to plan because...

And the biggest rage of this entire movie: They fucking KILLED Misu!! They KILLED HIM! THEY DROWNED HIM! His nae is MISU! Don’t take it or make it so meta oh my god! I cannot believe they killed him. before he went out on the mission, he spoke to Amane and was like ‘lets go eat after this. Make sure you make a reservation.’ and as SOON as he said that I started crying because I fucking knew they were going to kill him off and they did! I cried the entire way home (which is two trains and about 30minutes). WHY DID YOU KILL ANOTHER OF MY FAVOURITE CHARACTERS?! You’ve killed TWO out of my THREE favourite characters now! Fuck you Messiah... Fuck you. But jesus christ, Tamaki’s acting as he’s screaming for Messiah, the police and for anyone to just stop the water from going into the tunnel where Misu was, was so heart breaking and real and raw to watch. It’s so heartbreaking! And Misu dies starring the water right in the face and giving it the middle finger and just... I’m going to cry now...

...

..

.

Towards the end, Miike leaves a note for Ariga and he goes down the where the violin and some plant is, and soon Mamiya reveals himself to Ariga. It’s this moment that Ariga says ‘You’ll always be my Messiah, but I have Itsuki now’ and Mamiya goes to speak, he starts with ‘from here on out-’ but fucking Itsuki freaking interrupts with his yelling from the top of the stairs and when Ariga turns back around, Mamiya is gone -__- but I do love Ariga’s last line where he yells “KAGAMI!!! .... Urusai / You’re fucking loud / You’re annoying’. It’s such a predictable moment but also a very good moment but god dammit! Give me that message Mamiya wanted to say!! RAGE!!

And then we’re back in the onsen. It goes (left to right) Ichijima, Yuuki, Kuruge, and Itsuki. Miike is, for some reason there, but outisde the bath fully clothed and just hanging there. Itsuki is sulking ‘Ariga told me ‘nothing’s wrong’ tut. But clearly something is wrong!’ xD

Ichijima yelling about Kaito being dead in front of Kuroko and Kuroko being dead scared of him. Ichijima was pissed at Kamikita the entire movie for some reason...

I absolutely love the ending! And by ending I mean POST CREDIT SCENE! We follow and suited figure walked down the aisle and then going into an office which has Amane’s letter and Misu’s picture and teddy bear and then the camera pans around to reveal Amane. He looked very sexy in that suit and glasses. He stars right at the camera and says ‘Okay Misu-san... 俺たちの革命の始まりだ / This is were our revolution starts’ and he smiles and BAM ending!

---

Some scenes I don’t remember what order they were in but I liked:

There’s a scene where Misu and Amane are in the car (a flashback) and I did not pay attention to conversation because the BL-idiot in me was like ‘are they gunna kiss?! Just kiss!’ xD I thought they were gunna kiss xD damn my brain!

James in a suit!!! He looked so good and he spoke Russia for most of his screen time which was interesting! But unfortunately I don’t know ho accurate it is xD

Also, upon the first watch, it looked like Amane Shougo had let James in and acknowledged his presences when he first walked into the cop institution.

After seeing this movie, some questions, theories and comments I want to make are:

What the fuck is up Miike? He’s able to hear Mamiya’s violin and sees him and obviously talks to him a few times. And Ichijima clearly understands what’s going on with Miike because he lets him relax rather than participate in the mission! Some ghost whisperer or what?! 

Is Shikura Misu's dad?!?! At the end Misu is like, ‘it was you who sent to teddy bear wasn’t it?’ and Shikura is like ‘yeah’ so he’s known Misu since he was  tiny boy! He’s gotta be the dad!

Also, I am convinced Kugure and Ichijima are related. They have the same speech pattern and speed, their way of thinking is the same, Kugure is always standing RIGHT next to Ichijima and sometimes a little too close. And they look similar and wear glasses.

Why, why, why, why did they kill Misu?!???! 

And what's Amane gunna do after this?!?? He’s on his own now! I thought both TamaChan and Nakamura were leaving Messiah for good but with THIS ending then... Amane’s gunna be getting some shit blown up right?! He’s clearly still going to be involved... but why did you have to kill Misu?!

---

PHEW! I’m done... goddammit Messiah! Why you gotta break hearts?! Can we not have a happy story for once?!

*TokiEnta = Toki Entertainment Company which Tamaki and Nakamura, (other like Baba Ryoma, Tomita Sho, Takasaki Shouta, Aramaki Yoshihiko) are part of.

[thefoolsloop]

But for your husband, he is noble, wise, judicious: SNM Shanghai, show no. 2

**(Spoilers for Nurse and male new character loops; but, again, not for any 1:1s. The Nurse’s loop can have a lot of interaction in it, so I have tried to be vague about this, except where necessary to convey the intensity of the loop. As before, I’ve changed the order of scenes in each loop, and tried to be suggestive of the content, rather than descriptive. However, the new story can’t really be discussed without giving away some of the basic content, so once again I apologise if I spoil anything. If you think you’re going to Shanghai soon, I would wait on reading this write-up until you’ve seen the show at least once. Otherwise, continue and enjoy.

PS I’m trying to keep these write-ups to below 2,000 words. It’s not going well.)**

I knew the pain was coming.

When I went to New York to see SNM in 2015, the pain began on day 2 and intensified to a crippling level on day 3. I figured the pattern would be much the same in Shanghai, and so it proved. No one knows what causes my migraines, but fatigue appears to be a significant factor. Jetlag, stress, and a self-guided walking tour through the French Concession, all put a pressure on my body that forced it to the point of rebellion. STOP. REST. NOW.

But not quite now. The pain is brewing, but I think I can make it through a show. I’ve not yet seen Miranda’s Nurse and, although the Nurse in New York was a loop I could take or leave (its development from loop to loop is fascinating, but there’s an awful lot of downtime in between), I just know Miranda will do something special with it. (As it turns out, I am not to be disappointed.)

But first, the ballroom, just to see who’s there. Some potentially interesting performers to follow but Sam is not present tonight, and there’s no one whom I can’t safely save until later. So I climb four flights of stairs, and find myself in the hospital ward.

There she is, a mere scattering of white masks in attendance. She and the Matron (Tang Tingting, known among the cast as “Tangtang”, so that’s how I’ll refer to her) are busy. They are folding bedsheets, and this goes on for a while: stretching, folding. I’m conflicted: on the one hand, this is not scintillating viewing, though it’s arguably marginally more engaging than the top of the Nurse’s loop in New York. On the other hand, I’m with Miranda, and I would watch Miranda read out a telephone directory. In fact, I would watch Miranda read a telephone directory to herself. Why? Because she would find a way to make it gripping.

(Let my praise of Miranda not obscure my admiration for Tangtang. Her performance as the Matron is a masterclass in subtlety. Of all the Chinese cast, she is one of the highlights.)

So these sheets are being folded and it’s mildly diverting, until I realise that they’re being folded into a shape. A very familiar shape. A shape which represents one of the themes which runs through the Shanghai show, and whose significance is so far lost on me. The sanction on spoilers prevents me saying more, but this is a subject I’m keen to pursue with fans and cast as much as I can, because it’s absent from New York and its presence here in China seems utterly incongruous.

But now it’s time to move, because the room is suddenly filling with characters, and the new scene I caught a glimpse of yesterday is gearing up. It’s a scene I can’t watch (especially with a migraine slowly burgeoning), so I leave the room until it’s over. When I go back in, I’m faced with a tableau of devastation and tragedy, and it’s clear this is one of the must-see moments of the new production. Sadly, for me, it’s a must-not-see, or I shall end up in a real hospital.

**SPOILER FOR 1:1 SELECTION (BUT NOT THE 1:1 CONTENT)**

Omar is here, his storyline having been recast to incorporate the new events. He leads the entire company to a small room, where he selects for a 1:1. To my surprise, though, it’s not a 1:1 with him. It appears to be a 1:1 with the Nurse. Gah, an opportunity lost. OK, next loop maybe.

**(SPOILER ENDS)**

Omar leaves the room, locks the door and pockets the key with an air of finality. He seems satisfied, smug even. He strides off, followers in tow. I’m left on my own, waiting for Miranda to finish her 1:1. But she emerges sooner than I expect, and from a different door. We’re alone together in the corridor. She pauses, looks at me. Her stare is direct, challenging; her expression disdainful. The flicker of recognition I caught yesterday in the ballroom has disappeared. There is no flirty witch tonight. Then she hands me the towels she’s carrying, tilts her head as if to say, “come on, then”, and leads the way back to the hospital.

From that moment on, she owns me. Every action I take is dictated by her whim. We proceed through a series of interactions (moving beds, hanging up jackets, holding things), no doubt mundane to watch for those not involved; but for me it’s a series of duties I must carry out perfectly for fear of punishment. No matter what I do, she seems dissatisfied; not once does her expression alter from contempt, bordering on disgust. The impression given is that she didn’t want this job, she didn’t ask to do this job, and since I’m here I might as well make it easier on her - but I shouldn’t expect any thanks. Only a few times does her aura change: the table dance, the 1:1s (yes, more than one), a new scene with the new characters.

(A brief digression on this new scene: it’s utterly beautiful and charming. Everything I found wanting in SNM New York is present in this scene: compassion, affection, gentleness, beauty. One of the highlights of the Shanghai show, and I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. I only wish I was at liberty to tell you what it is.)

(Miranda’s Nurse, taken from the show programme. I’ve not been able to find this at a higher resolution, would be grateful if anyone can supply it.)

She fills out a medical form, tears it off, hands it to me. I don’t know what to do with it. For several minutes I walk around holding this bloody piece of paper, trying to perform the interactions with one hand. Eventually she turns away, and with relief I fold it and put it into my back pocket. As I’m doing so, she turns back to me and presents me with her medical bag. My hands are full. Another white mask steps in and opens it. She glares at me with a look bordering on hatred. You had one job… Despite this I appear to be forgiven, as she delivers me both 1:1s (I was going to say more about them - without spoilers - but things written in print cannot be erased; let’s just say Miranda put a lot of trust in me).

Miranda’s table dance deserves singling out. As with her Sexy Witch bar dance, the control she has, the range of expression she displays, the almost inhuman ability she has to defy gravity with her body (imagine raising your entire body from flat on your back to a 45-degree angle without the use of your hands, then returning to horizontal - I mean, just try it), the risks she takes, the total dedication and immersion into character she has… it is almost impossible to describe a Miranda solo without finding the words inadequate. You simply have to see it.

As I’m watching her perform this dance, her left shoe flies off. She finishes the routine, slides to the end of the table, lands directly next to me, fixes me with that look of stricture, and holds up a finger. “Wait!” her eyes say. She dips to the floor and slides the shoe on, dextrously tying the laces, as if this was all carefully rehearsed. I know it’s not, and I fear she’ll miss her next cue, but all is well - it takes mere seconds. Then, as if rewarding me for waiting, she hauls me off to a 1:1.

I stick loyally with her (she gives me no choice) until the beautiful new scene I mentioned earlier. Since Ben is involved in this scene, however, and since I haven’t seen this story in full, I decide to follow him from this point (thereby spoiling Miranda’s plans for me, as she reveals a few days later - but more on that in another write-up).

Ben’s character - is it sufficiently common knowledge yet that we can safely refer to him as the Husband? - is utterly lovable. A well-meaning man, constantly at the mercy of people who manipulate and beguile him, his intense good nature shines through his narrative thread. Eager to please, he finds himself tricked, seduced, bullied, pressured and ultimately almost destroyed by the forces around him. He’s the only Husband I spent time with on this trip, so I can’t say how the others played him, but after his cynical, snarling, despairing Conrad in TDM this is a major departure and testimony to his versatility as a performer. Ben’s interplay with Omar is one of the highlights of the show; the former naive, vulnerable, trying to do his best; the latter manipulative, cruel, tyrannical and two-faced. Again, how other performers present this two-hander I can’t say, but these two old friends (who would rarely if ever have shared a scene in TDM) are right on each other’s wavelength.

I’ll say more about them in my next write-up, which starts with Omar, but Ben’s Husband loop gives me good insight into the new story, which has a charming narrative thread and a beautiful, heartbreaking final scene - to say nothing of THAT scene which everyone’s talking about, which I can’t witness, but which sounds like the kind of jaw-dropping, mind-expanding experience Punchdrunk prides itself on (oh, and there’s also another new scene which I’ll cover in the next show’s write-up). I do wonder why something like this couldn’t have been incorporated into New York - might yet be - but that’s for a different post.

I feel bad not giving Ben as much time in this report as I’ve given Miranda. But there’s too much about the new story I can’t reveal, and my relationship with Ben throughout the loop is distant and observational, not collaborative like with Miranda.

With those loops over, I wander the space looking for something to catch my imagination. I catch a few moments of Omagbitse’s Bald Witch, who is powerful, bordering on terrifying, with a rawness and vividness arguably missing from other interpretations. But I lose her in the crowd, and it’s time to move on.

The pain in my head isn’t getting any better. I try to spend some time with the Porter, hoping I can sit on one of the chairs in the lobby and catch a break, but he’s never there when I wander through. The crowds are getting tiresome, and I only catch glimpses of scenes from behind people’s heads. Eventually I calculate that the Nurse’s loop must be coming towards its conclusion. I find the Nurse and the Matron together upstairs. Like the evil twins in The Shining, they march in lockstep through the corridors and rooms, as if on a mission. When they get to the Macbeths’ suite they take advantage of their employers’ sudden absence in a way I won’t reveal but which is very amusing. Then they tidy up in conspiratorial fashion, as if aware all this is going to be played out again tomorrow. Finally they turn and look at the audience.

I’ve positioned myself for a final moment with Miranda, but it’s Tangtang who catches my eye. She takes me down through the crowds to watch the finale, then escorts me silently to the Manderley, where we part company without a word. Her bearing is quietly controlled, her face as impassive as her co-conspirator. In New York the Nurse and Matron seemed to be long-lost sisters eventually finding each other; in Shanghai their relationship seems much more equal, more like co-workers engaged in pulling the strings of the top floor activities.

My head is throbbing dangerously, and I’m wondering how much of tomorrow I’m going to lose to my illness. I bid my fellow westerners goodnight. But on leaving I find myself in the company of Omar and Fania, and they are so delightful and engaging that I lose another hour in conversation. Omar in particular is a mine of information about TDM, about Punchdrunk-style performance and about his experiences as the Fool, obviously a subject close to my heart. By the time I’m in bed it’s gone midnight and I have lost any chance of seeing any of Shanghai tomorrow. But: for two days with Miranda, and more besides? Worth the sacrifice.

[olicitysizzles-blog]

CBR: Obviously, “Arrow’s” writers didn’t simply want to recycle what had been done with Ra’s al Ghul or Nyssa. How is Talia different than her father and half-sister?

Lexa Doig: It’s hard to say. This is my interpretation of it: Talia left the League of Assassins and forged her own way in the world, and her way is more in the real world as opposed to influencing events from the periphery. She may have a more direct hand, yet she’s very Talia al Ghul in that mentality of, “Why do it myself when I can get someone else to do it for me?” She is still someone who is a bit of a chess master. That would be my interpretation. All of my stuff has been with Stephen Amell, and it’s all been the flashback training. There hasn’t really been a reference for me of how she operates outside of that context.

In Talia’s first appearance, she disposed of Oliver’s assailants and rescued him. What did you enjoy about what that said about Talia?

The funny thing that I enjoyed about that introduction, from a completely technical perspective, is that it was one shot. That was the only thing I did the entire episode, but what a cool entrance. What it said was how badass the character is, taking out all those guys without batting an eyelash, and just stepping in with this mysterious, “Where have you been? I’ve been looking for you.”

Genre fans know you from “Jason X,” “Andromeda,” “Stargate SG-1,” and “Continuum.” What’s it been like joining the DC Universe?

It’s been so much fun. My ultimate goal – and I really want this, so I am putting it out in the universe – is I want Talia to have a Funko Pop! character. In my mind, I will have arrived if I can bring home a Funko Pop! character, a little figurine, and show it to my kids and say, “See. Mommy is cool.”

What did you make of Talia’s costume? Did it help you get into character?

What I love about the costume is how badass it makes me look. What made me laugh about the costume is the logistics of being in a superhero costume. They don’t tell you the quirks. For example, the quiver that goes in the back is often like a cone that your cat wears when he comes home from the vet. You’re not aware of it, you go to walk through a doorway, you slam your quiver into the side and you get stuck. Or the hood, when it’s up. My hood has to have a certain thickness. It’s made out of leather, so it stands up and looks nice, but then you have no peripheral vision and you can’t hear anything.

Then, there are these amazing side harnesses they have for me and they squeak a bit when I walk. The thing that I found funny about my very first day on set was walking around and looking so incredibly badass, but sounding like [makes squeaking noises]. As I walk, I’m bumping into things. I can’t hear what anybody says. I can’t see anything. It was just funny. Those are the hilarious things you discover about playing a badass, and how awkward it is. I have such respect for everyone on the show who has to wear these incredible costumes and stand there, looking badass and fighting and doing all the cool stuff. You have to overcome this hurdle of [squeaking sounds] and catching your cape on the back of your quiver.

When she arrives, Oliver was a lost soul. What does Talia see in him?

I think she saw potential. Oliver is somebody who is savage. He’s incredibly adept at what he wants to accomplish, but is a little directionless. He is on the side of good in those circumstances. It’s a bit murky and gray in the question of how he’s going to accomplish his goals, though. I don’t think that moral gray area is a difficult place for Talia to inhabit. She’s quite comfortable living there herself. What she saw in Oliver is the fact that he’s an incredible killer, and he’s doing it for the right reasons. She’s trying to point him in the right direction of what he really wants to accomplish.

Do you consider Talia a hero, wanting to make the city a better place out of the goodness of her heart? Does Oliver serve her agenda?

He sort of serves her agenda. I used to play Dungeons & Dragons when I was younger, and Talia strikes me as someone who is neutral in that it’s a balance, but maybe adding into that a little bit on the chaotic evil side. She has things she wants to accomplish, and she’s going to accomplish them by any means necessary. If it turns out to have positive ramifications and be a good thing, then “Yay” for everybody. If it doesn’t, it sucks to be anybody but her.

She’s described as “an elite warrior.” Where do you feel she ranks among the other League of Assassin members and Oliver?

Right up there. After a certain point, when you’re that good, it’s a matter of substance. Anybody can accomplish the things they need to accomplish. It’s just a matter of how they go about doing it. When you compare all the various superheroes and supervillains – and you have these wonderful theoretical discussions of who would win between Nyssa and Talia – it largely ends up being a draw. Or, when you get two really good hockey teams playing against each other, sometimes it just goes your way, and sometimes it doesn’t. I think they’re all elite.

Audiences have only gotten a taste of what Talia is capable of. Are we going to see more of her fighting prowess?

A little bit. I had a really great stunt double. I didn’t do a ton of it. You do see a little bit of it, but not a ton. The storyline really isn’t about how badass she is. It’s more about Talia helping Oliver find himself and find the Hood. Again, what seperates Talia from Nyssa and Ra’s is her ability to operate in the real world, the not-so-secret world. As accomplished as she is as a fighter, some of Talia’s strengths may lie in her intellect and her ability to read or manipulate a situation and play the long game. She’s someone who knows things and has the patience to play the long game.

So far, the series has only scratched the surface between Talia and Oliver. What can you tease about how that relationship unfolds?

She does what she set out to do. She very rarely doesn’t succeed at what she wants to accomplish. At this point, what she wants to accomplish is to help Oliver make peace with the savage side of himself and find a way to partition that into a place where he feels very comfortable with his alter-ego, whether the alter-ego is Arrow or Oliver Queen. That’s for him to decide, but it’s for whatever part of him that needs to exist in the real, above-ground, legit world versus the one that exists in the shadows. I do believe she actually accomplishes her goals.

Will viewers eventually get to see Talia in present day?

I don’t know. I will plead the fifth. I will say that Oliver seems to think that some of her interactions from the past may leave echoes in the present day. I can’t tell you whether it’s correct or not, but he does have that theory.

Fans have speculated that Talia shares ties with Prometheus. Have you come across those presumptions? What are your thoughts on that possibility?

I have no idea who Prometheus is. I only ever work with Stephen because of the nature of the flashbacks. It’s funny, because even on the call sheets, when you are shooting scenes that have Prometheus in them, he’s not technically listed on the call sheet. The character is listed, but no performer or actor is listed as Prometheus. Even I, who works on the show, have no idea who Prometheus is. So, if Talia has connections to Prometheus, I don’t know about it.

Katrina Law has told me she would love for Nyssa and Talia to square off. How would you like to see their dynamic play out?

I would love that. Here’s my problem. My instinct is to always go for funny and comedy. It doesn’t always play well in the comic book world, because everything is always very high stakes, which is also fun. I think it would be hilarious if the two of them didn’t get along, but in a very modern-day, sibling kind of way. Maybe they butt heads, but it’s over somebody taking too much time in the bathroom. That would be hilarious, although the fight scene would look pretty badass. It would be a killer fight sequence. I’m also a family sap at heart, so I’d also love to see Talia and Nyssa fighting on the same side – and arguing with each other at the same time.