#we dont talk about that second head in panel

[down-a-dark-allie-way]

Its so rare but, dontcha just love it when the expression comes out JUST the way you wanted it to?!?! Like not anatomically but, vibically.

[thelov3lybookworm]

Love's Bullshit.

Summary: maybe love wasnt bullshit after all.

•○●⛦●○•

Word Count: 5225

Warnings: a tinyyy tiny bit of angst, pining, unrequited feeling but requited in the end, sad rhysie poo healing but we dont really get into that. uh i think thats it? let me knowif theres more i need to add <3

A/n: let me tell yall, when i wrote this i think i had watched some pasta videos and helped my mum clean up some green veggies lmaoo, so Y/n's thoughts are just me yapping lol.

rhys would be happy i finally wrote something fluffy for him lmao

I LOVED WRITING TIS SM OML I HOPE YALL LOVE READING IT AKFJHDFH

(im sorry im back to my p.s bs again cus thank you to my wifey for, again, helping me plan this fic out and also this fic is again based on an indian song 😭)

anyways, enjoyyy🥹🤭

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

It had almost become a ritual, standing around the coffee machine and waiting to grab the two cups of coffee.

It was a ritual, stalking back to the office with two cups of steaming coffee in her hand.

It was a ritual, trying her best not to blush when her boss smiled at her, his fingers brushing hers as he took his black coffee from her hands, a soft thank you slipping past his lips, his attention already focused on the screen of his laptop.

Y/n did not know how she hadn’t yet told him she loved him, but whatever force held those words captive in her chest, she thanked it every day.

Today was no different as she made her way into the elevator, nodding to the others who filed in after her with a small smile. Silence filled her ears, only broken by the ding of the elevator doors as it opened to let a couple of employees out onto the second floor. Y/n leaned back, sighing as the doors dragged close again, her head resting against the shiny metal as her eyes fixed themselves on the little panel above the door.

5.

7.

10.

13.

15.

25.

Ding.

Y/n walked out, subconsciously searching for that familiar figure of her boss. The final floor of the building had been turned into a huge office for the CEO and the owner and his two best friends who helped manage the place, so it was not hard to find him, standing hunched over the huge mahogany desk as he scribbled something in a file.

She moved forward, lips stretching to accommodate the smile that spread on her lips without permission.

"Good evening, sir."

His head rose, the black rimmed glasses perched on his nose caching in the light. "Good evening, Y/n." His violet eyes tracked her movements, an easy smile on that full mouth.

He turned around the moment she set his coffee on his desk, attention already flitting away to focus on more important things.

It irritated Y/n to no end that he would not even try to talk to her- or anyone, really- unless it was related to work.

"Uh, have a good day, sir."

He nodded, and Y/n took that as her que to leave. She walked towards the desk that Y/n occupied. Being the CEO’s secretary, he wanted her close by in case he needed anything. Thankfully, the two managers were too busy with their own work to look at the blush that covered Y/n.

Time flew by as she settled down again, forcing herself to stop thinking about how those eyes would shine from up close, and started typing away in her laptop, her surroundings fading into nothing.

The next time Y/n stood to stretch her back, it was already dark outside the huge glass walls, and she leaned back, her back curving before it finally popped. The other two men that worked on the top floor, Cassian and Azriel, had already left half an hour ago, after bidding Y/n and Rhysand goodbye.

Relieved breath escaping her lips, she turned to find herself alone with Rhysand, who now sat with his back straight. So straight that Y/n was concerned that it would hurt him.

Something was wrong.

Before she could inquire, the elevator doors slid open, and the loud clicking of stilettos filled the silent atmosphere.

She’s beautiful.

That was Y/n’s first thought.

Long, straight light brown hair, almost bordering blond, the woman stalked straight up to the rich dark wooden desk, ire blazing in her eyes, anger seeping from every pore in her body.

Y/n should have left, she knew she should have.

But she didn’t, even knowing she would regret not leaving when everything seemed fine.

Rhys, eyes wide, stumbled to his feet.

Y/n had never seen that man ever stumble.

"Did I not tell you to stay away from me?"

His mouth parted, and Y/n watched with bated breath to see what would happen.

"Hello to you too, Feyre d-"

"Call off your stalker."

Fingers of ice skated down Y/n’s spine. Stalker?

His eyes hardened, jaw clenched. "He isn’t a stalker."

The woman let out an incredulous laugh. "Oh? Then what is he?"

"He’s there to protect you-"

"And what is he protecting me from? The trees in my backyard?"

Y/n swallowed, eyes flitting away. The elevator was near her, but it would draw attention. But it was definitely better than standing and watching the two like a creep.

"Feyre…" It was dark, but Y/n knew that Rhys glanced at her frozen form. "Let’s talk somewhere else, please. You’re making a scene-"

"No. I’m not going anywhere with you."

He released a frustrated breath, and Y/n finally got herself moving.

She grabbed her purse and hurried towards the elevator, hoping he did not think that she was judging him. Even as hard as she tried to be quiet, her heels clicked, and she froze, panic seizing every muscle in her body as she felt his eyes on her.

Swallowing, she hit the button on the silver panel, and the doors slid open, thankfully revealing that the elevator was still on their floor. As soon as she walked in, she hit the button to close the doors continuously, then pressed the button to the ground floor.

Idly she watched herself in the glass in the back of the elevator, her eyes travelling over her own figure.

Hmm. Pretty, but not as much as that lady.

It was clear that Rhys and she had something together. If not now, then before. And with the way Rhysand’s eyes had lit up with love but also sadness, she knew it was romantic.

Eh. Never really stood a chance anyway.

The elevator finally stopped moving, and Y/n walked out to greet a few lingering employees, who smiled and nodded at her. She smiled too, her mind already wandering to what she would eat for dinner. Maybe she could just get takeout-

She couldn’t.

Ugh.

She groaned as she remembered that her car had broken down the day before, and she’d had it towed to a mechanic shop, who had taken one look at the old, run down vehicle and said it would take them at the very least one week to fix.

Uber it is.

As she walked towards the exit, Y/n shoved her hand into her purse to grab her phone, but everything that came into her hand was not in the shape of that specific piece of rectangle.

Please. I don’t want to go up there again.

Pausing a few feet away from the automatic sliding doors, she peered into the little black purse, and sure enough, she could not see her phone.

Great. Just what I needed.

It didn’t have to be a big deal, Y/n told herself. She would just run up through the stairs, quietly grab her phone and leave.

Sure, you’ve got the energy and bones to run up twenty five floors.

Maybe she could just ask someone else to order a cab for her and she could just take her phone tomorrow-

It was Saturday tomorrow. No office.

Sighing, Y/n turned back, only to find the elevator doors opening and the same clicking of stilettos that had heralded the arrival of that pretty lady. And sure enough, when Y/n looked up from her purse while still cursing her own existence, the woman was walking towards her.

Y/n watched in awe as she stalked past her and out the automatic doors without sparing the countless onlookers a single glance, as if they all were a mere insect and she the god.

If Y/n was being honest, she envied her confidence while also respecting her for it. Y/n could only wish she was that good at being self assured to not trip and faceplant in front of everyone.

Y/n watched till the lady got into the back of a shiny white Audi and drove away, and only then did Y/n remember why she was still in the building.

She hurried into the elevator, her impatience mounting everytime it stopped on different floors for people to get on and off, but by the time she reached the top floor, she was all alone in that metal box. Her heart beating in her throat, she tried to walk as quietly to her desk as she could and snatched off the little device that lay beside her office laptop.

"Y/n?"

She had just turned around to sneak back to the elevator, trying not to look at the silhouette of her boss who stood gazing outside the floor to ceiling glass windows when he called. The low timbre of his voice made her freeze midstep, then glance at him as she brought her lifted leg to rest next to her other one.

"Yes, sir?"

He said nothing for a moment, and Y/n looked around, unsure of what to do. Just as her eyes came to rest on the elevator, it left to go down.

Y/n eyed the metal doors with disappointment when Rhysand asked her to come stand next to him.

She obeyed quietly, the only sound in the silent office that of her of her heels clicking on the marble floors.

He remained quiet when she stopped next to him, his dark blue eyes that bordered on looking like violet under a certain angle of light fixed on the glittering city beneath. Y/n too turned to gaze out of the huge windows when he refused to let his attention move.

It was beautiful, the city. Tall buildings lit up with lights on the inside, their glass reflecting light coming off of large billboards, the red and white lights from cars speeding by blurring together in a beautiful scenery of night, complemented by the full moon that hung amidst a sea of stars.

"It’s beautiful, isn’t it?"

Y/n blinked, coming out of her reverie and taking note of her surroundings again before replying. "Yeah, it is."

He sighed after a moment, glancing at her. "Have you ever been in love, Y/n? Do you believe in it?"

Y/n glanced at him, taken aback by his question.

"I- I guess so. I am currently in love, if it matters."

He nodded, his lips tilted up slightly at the corners.

"Does he know?"

"He… no. And I don’t think I will tell him." A pause, then- "what about you? Do you believe in it?"

"No. Not anymore. It’s bullshit and all it does is hurt people."

"Oh…" Y/n mumbled, not knowing how to respond to that.

He glanced at her uncertainly, then dropped the topic.

"You must have questions."

Y/n met his eyes that glittered like sapphires in the darkened office, then shook her head. "I don’t think I should have questions, and even if I did, I won’t ask them. You have a right to keep your private life private."

He nodded, his eyes unwavering. Y/n could not for the life of her figure out what he was thinking, so instead she focused on her own faint reflection on his black rimmed glasses.

Is there something in my teeth?

He took in a deep breath, looking away.

Nah, there’s nothing. Thank god.

"What did you come back for?"

Y/n blinked, then perked up. "Oh, my phone." She lifted the thing and waved it. "I thought I’d leave it and collect it on Monday, but then I had to order a cab, so-"

"Cab? Why? What happened to your car?"

"Ah, it broke down yesterday. It’s at the mechanic’s. It will take at the very least a week to get fixed, so." She shrugged.

"Well, if that’s the case, let me drop you off."

Y/n���s eyes widened, and she shook her head as if trying to dislodge his offer. "No, sir, please. I can go by myself-"

"Never said you couldn’t." he mumbled, a hint of a smile on his face as he began collecting his phone and keys from the drawer under his desk, rummaging around for whatever it was he needed before straightening.

"Sir-"

"Come."

With that, he began stalking to the elevator, leaving Y/n no choice but to hurry after him.

He ignored all her protests and didn’t even let her get off on the ground floor when she decided that she was going to get a cab nonetheless, and grabbed her hand to force her to stay still.

Of course, the moment his skin touched hers, she froze and then quietly followed him to his black Mercedes in the underground parking.

The ride to her home was mostly silent, the quiet only broken by his deep voice asking for directions and her mumbling when to turn.

If Y/n was being honest, she did not know what to do with herself. She was in a car with her boss who she was in love with, the one who she’d just witnessed get accused of stalking his lover- ex?- and then he was ready to answer her questions about his private life and-

She knew her mind was going into overdrive.

Calm down. He'd think I’m a weirdo.

And him thinking she was a weirdo will just not do-

He probably already thinks I am a weirdo.

Y/n sighed quietly, then told him to stop under the apartment her parents had left her. It was one of the finer things in her life.

"Thank you for dropping me off sir, you really didn’t have to do that." With that and a word of goodbye from Rhysand, Y/n turned to step out of the luxurious vehicle, then stopped.

She did not have time to debate whether offering him to follow her would be a good idea because the damning words were already spilling out of her lips.

"Would you like to stay for dinner sir? Let me cook you something as a thank you."

He smiled, then nodded and asked her where he could park. She directed him to her usual parking spot because her car was not occupying the space.

She cooked her special pasta that night. It was something that her friends always begged her to make whenever they were over and it was also very easy and quick to throw together.

The two of them made friendly conversation throughout the time he stayed over, with the night ending with Rhys asking her to be a part of their friend group that included him, Azriel, Cassian and Rhysand’s cousin.

As surprising as it was, Y/n shyly agreed, considering she hated socialising as much as she hated mushy vegetables.

"Perfect." Rhysand grinned as he stood at the door, ready to leave. "I’ll text you the address for the dinner next week. I can’t wait for you to  be a part of us."

With that, he left Y/n to herself and her thoughts.

That night, she fell asleep thinking about Rhysand.

She knew she could never have him romantically, and that was okay.

As long as she became friends with him, it was all that mattered.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Y/n stood, watching the horizon twinkle with golden lights and hints of colour, their reflection in the river between hypnotising.

In the past months, Y/n had gotten closer to Rhys and his friends. They almost were the family she never had, the sibling-like bond they shared cherished beyond expectations.

Somewhere along the two months, Y/n had stopped focusing too much on how much she wanted to be with Rhysand, and yet, she knew she began to fall for him even more than she already had. Worse still, she now had more time to focus on all his little habits and quirks now that she hung out with him outside of office hours.

"Y/n. I think you need to get over whoever that asshole is, you know."

Y/n blinked, turning to face Rhys as he came to stand against the railing next to her.

"What?"

"You know, it’s been a long time since you told me about him. And if you’re still not dating, then I think you need to either tell him or forget him."

Y/n sighed. "It’s not that I don’t want to tell him. I know he would never love me back."

He nodded solemnly. "You said it yourself then. He would never love you. You might as well find someone new to love."

When Y/n rolled her eyes and turned back to stare into the dark waters, he tried again. "At least tell me who this love interest of yours is. Maybe I can knock some sense into him- or her, if you’re into that. I’m tired of seeing you be painfully single."

Y/n shook her head with a rueful smile, wondering what his reaction would be if she actually told him who this ‘love interest’ was.

Since Rhys had asked Y/n to be a part of the friend group, he had managed to get out a confession from Y/n about this ‘mysterious daddy of yours’. His own words, not hers.

He would try to find out who this guy was, he was adamant even, but every time Y/n would manage to escape without revealing who she was head over heels for. She had a relationship with Rhysand that was very precious to her, and she was not interested in jeopardising that.

It was better to just go on a date if it meant he would stop trying to get her to confess.

"Alright. I’ll go on a date."

Y/n could see him perk up. "Really? Let’s find you a guy. It will be so fun."

Y/n offered him a smile before he slipped away, then let the smile drop.

Having grown up without a real friend due to her social anxiety, Y/n cherished the friendship she and Rhys shared.

Initially, she had thought that becoming friends with him would be the best thing to ever happen to her. And it was, but it was also one of the most hurtful things she had gone through.

Being able to talk to him whenever she wanted to, being able to do everything she had ever wanted to do with him, yet not being able to love him the way she truly wanted was a curse in itself.

Sighing, Y/n told herself to stop thinking too much and walked away.

The next two days went by uneventfully, but then the third day, of course, Rhysand had to disrupt Y/n’s peace as she tapped away on her laptop, Cassian hot on his heels.

Those grins on their faces never meant good.

She raised a brow at them, eyeing Cass as he climbed on her table and settled down, pushing away the files in his way.

"Can I help you?"

"Yes, actually." Cass giggled before a word could escape Rhys’s mouth. Rhysand brows rose. "What do you think I should do for Nesta on her birthday?"

Y/n blinked, then leaned back in her seat, scratching her head. "Hmm. She likes to read, right? There’s a new book store that opened recently, it's very big and beautiful. She would love to go there. Make a day out of it. Take her there, then maybe a coffee date and movies-"

Rhys cleared his throat with a pointed glare at a very serious Cassian, who nodded at every word out of Y/n’s mouth and pulled out his phone to note down what to do. "We were here for another thing. Remember?"

Cassia grinned sheepishly and nodded, putting away his phone.

Rhys turned back to Y/n then. "You know, I recently got in contact with an old acquaintance from college." Y/n waited for him to drop the bomb on her, because there was no way he looked so serious just because he wanted to tell her that.

"I set you up on a date with him."

Y/n was rendered speechless. She did not know what to do, what to think. It was like even her mind had stopped working.

Just amazing. This is perfect. The man I love is acting like a wingman. What more could I have asked for?

When she remained silent, Cass and Rhys exchanged an uncertain glance.

"Uh, he’s well off, he’s good looking. He drives a BMW I believe, and-"

"Hmm. Just let me know the time and address."

Rhys blinked at Y/n, surely taken aback by the lack of emotion in her monotone voice. "I- okay yeah but-"

Just then, her phone rang. It was the receptionist. Y/n smiled, thanking every being she could think of for this distraction. She had plans of lunch with the girl who was like a friend too, and so it gave her the perfect escape.

But as she excused herself and all three friends went their separate ways, she could not help but feel someone's gaze on her. And sure enough, as she turned after entering the elevator, she found Rhys studying her, his gaze intense as it met hers.

But the eye contact was cut short as the doors slid closed, and Y/n sighed, blinking away the prickling in her eyes.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

She did not want to get dressed, but she also did want Rhys to stop bothering her about her love life, and so she had pulled out her favourite dress from the back of her closet and put it on after taking a shower.

She had just finished putting on some mascara and blush when the doorbell rang, and Y/n paused, staring at herself for a moment before deeming that enough makeup and standing, making her way out of her room. Surprisingly, at her door stood a grinning Rhys.

Y/n was taken aback. He hadn’t informed her of his arrival.

"Hey Rhys, what are you doing here?"

"Why? Are you not happy to see me?"

Y/n rolled her eyes, turning away to go to the kitchen, leaving him to close the door.

She grabbed a glass and filled it with water, then handed it to him when he followed her into the kitchen. She then turned and leaned against the counter, crossing her arms across her chest.

"So. What brings you here?"

He put away the glass after drinking half of the liquid inside, raising his eyebrows playfully.

"What, I can’t come to see my friend without a reason?"

Y/n just watched him, not buying his lies. When he refused to speak more, she sighed. "Rhys, we both know I am not believing the shit you’re spewing right now, so just tell me why you’re here."

He exhaled, leaning his hip against the counter opposite Y/n. "I just wanted to check up on you. You didn’t seem too excited to go on this date."

Y/n unfolded her arms, looking away from his concerned gaze perusing her form. "How can I be happy about going on a date with someone who’s not the man I love?"

"Then tell me who he is Y/n, I could set you up on a date with him." Gone was the friendly warmth he usually talked to her with.

"I can’t Rhysand."

"Why not?!"

"I just- I just can’t, okay? And anyways, I’m trying to move on."

"Who is he?"

"Maybe today I will go meet that friend of yours-"

"Who is he?"

"-and fall in love and I’ll forget him-"

"Tell me who he is-"

"I can’t."

"Why not?"

"You want to know who he is that badly? It’s you, Rhys! It’s you."

His eyes widened, his lips parting as he stared at her. "You- what?"

Y/n refused to look away from him, cursing herself for shedding that one traitorous tear. But then she turned away. "I’m running late. He must be waiting for me."

With that, she walked out the door, ignoring his calls of her name.

Love really was bullshit. It just hurts people.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

The two hours she spent with George- Greg? Gregory?- went by too fast. She did not even remember what he said. She could not stop thinking about Rhys and how she had confessed to him before coming to meet with the homo sapien in front of her.

He wanted to talk about himself, which Y/n did not mind one bit because she could not for the life of her listen. He was happy to yap and did not realise Y/n was zoned out the whole time he sang praises of himself, and was all too happy when Y/n paid for herself and then bid him goodbye, his eyes already fixed on a blonde across the restaurant.

Y/n did not want to go home yet, not knowing whether he left or not, so she decided to go sit at a beach near her home. It was empty at this time, most people either at home or out partying. It was a Saturday night after all.

Y/n felt like she had control over nothing. Since the day prior, all she could think of was how she wished she was prettier and had a chance to be with Rhys. She loved herself and her appearance, of course, but she could admit, she was nothing compared to that lady who had stormed into the office that day, telling Rhys to call off the stalker.

Y/n had never had any hope from the beginning. She had known that her feelings could not be anything but a crush, even if she wanted them to be more. Rhys was simply too good for her, and she was not above accepting that. She might have been delusional, but she wasn’t delusional enough to think he could ever return her feelings.

"I was waiting for you."

Y/n froze, suddenly aware of the sand grains between her toes, her heels discarded next to her, knees pulled up to her chest.

She did not respond, simply because she did not know how to. Now that she had been pulled out of her thoughts, she could hear him walking towards her, his steps cushioned by the shifting sand.

She decided to focus on the wind in her hair, on the soft, soothing melody of the water.

He settled down next to her, and she could not help but notice that he sat a little too close to be casual and friendly.

He said nothing for a long moment, and Y/n decided that in this moment, she could pretend to be his. She could pretend that he was hers and that they were madly in love. That he did not track her down here somehow and that the two of them were simply having a date night out.

"Her name is Feyre."

Y/n glanced at him from the corner of her eyes, unsure what he was talking about.

"She’s Nesta’s sister. That was how Nesta met Cassian, to be honest. She and I had been dating since we were in college."

It clicked for Y/n then, who he was talking about.

Tall, pretty, gorgeous hair and eyes. On top of that, a pretty name too? A jackpot, honestly.

As soon as that thought occurred to her, Y/n willed herself to stop thinking and just listen to the storytime by grandma Rhys.

Grandma Rhys??

All that was left was a rocking chair and some knitting needles and yarn.

He’d rock that fit too.

"She and Nesta… they grew up in conditions that were less than livable. Their father had lost his business and traumatised by the losses, he started staying home. Feyre had to work to keep the family going. She got to go to college because of scholarships."

Instantly, Y/n wished she could just give the lady a hug. But instead, she laid her head on her raised knees, turning her head to watch Rhys as he spoke.

"I had grown up in a filthy rich family, getting everything I wanted at my beck and call. Back then, I was smitten. Knowing what she had gone through, I wanted to provide for her. I took over my father’s businesses, began my own. Just so I could give her the lifestyle she deserved.

"While I was busy trying to get her to stop working… She wanted to provide for herself. It gave her a sense of independence, I understand that now. Having to depend on others before made her want to have freedom, and me trying to get her to stay at home made her feel suffocated. It led to a lot of arguments, more than was healthy. It upsetted me. I always wondered why she did not want to rule the empire I brought to her feet."

Y/n blinked, wondering what she would have done in that situation. Would she also have left Rhys?

"Eventually, she left me. Yet I could not bring myself to let go of her, always concerned about her safety for some reason. That’s when she came to the office, remember?"

Y/n did. A little too well.

But still, her heart hurt for him and her. She understood both sides, and she wished the two had just communicated better. Y/n knew they had loved each other a lot, it was clearly visible on their faces. At least on RHys’s. And from the way Rhys talked about her, Y/n could not help but like her too. She sounded like a nice person, someone deserving of someone as awesome as Rhys.

Even if that would have made Y/n’s chances of being with Rhys zero, she wished they had stayed and worked through their problems together.

He sighed, then turned his head to look at Y/n. "Do you know why I’m telling you this?"

Y/n shook her head, lifting it from her knees, trying to crack the tiny cramp.

He smiled. "I… while you were on that date, I sat and thought about it. Maybe it’s time for me to move on too. And now that I’ve acknowledged stuff I was too scared to before, I think I am ready."

His eyes held something so soft, so vulnerable as he gazed into Y/n’s eyes.

"Look, I don’t know how to say this without sounding like a complete creep and like an asshole, but I’m hoping you won’t judge me, but it’s fine if you’ve changed your mind and-"

"Just say it Rhys." Y/n laughed, already feeling like she knew where this was going.

He sighed. "I… do you want to go on a date with me?"

Y/n grinned. Flustered Rhys was something to cherish. "Sure, why not."

He perked up. "Really?"

She nodded. "As long as you actually want this and I’m not a replacement for Feyre-"

"You’re not, I swear! I’ve been feeling different towards you for some time now, I promise-"

"I believe you."

He blinked. "Really?"

Y/n nodded, and he relaxed, resting his head on her shoulder.

"This was easier than I thought it would be."

Y/n giggled.

It really was easier than expected.

Maybe love wasn’t bullshit after all.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Permanent Taglist: @berryzxx @sarawritestories @milswrites @throneofsmut

@daycourtofficial @sweetorangeblossom @secret-third-thing

Acotar Taglist: @bubybubsters @eos-princess @nightless @harrystylesfan2686

@cassie6392 @kennedy-brooke @tele86 @miluiel1

@hnyclover @minnieoo @sidrapotter @piceous21

@mybestfriendmademe @saltedcoffeescotch @lady-of-tearshed @starsinyourseyes

@starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @byyalady

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@sunnyspycat @artists-ally @milswrites @kingdomofstarrynights

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@mellowmusings

Rhysand Taglist: @kennedy-brooke @hnyclover

[thenixkat]

Chilchuck smokes and drinks excessively (with alcoholism running in his family and knowing his dad died of it), not a peep from any of the other characters.

Laios might gain excess weight from overeating? Gets lectured about the dangers of obesity and how it's bad for his health.

Me: Ah yes, of course, that makes sense. Not fatphobic or anything.

*Edit because fuckers really feel the need to come out of the woodwork to defend Dungeon Meshi when people point out the fatphobia in it.

Consider, instead of arguing that a scene isn't fatphobic b/c of your fucking *headcanons* of the other implications of Laios' condition. Perhaps, maybe, actually acknowledge the fucking text and images on the actual fucking page.

[ID: A panel from Dungeon Meshi showing Chilchuck (short humanoid in a dark top), Izutsumi (cat person; only the back of her head is visible), and Laios (tall humanoid, in this panel depicted as fat as an imagined scenario) with the words 'Human's Body' behind his head.

Chilchuk says, "That means you're gonna gain a ton of weight,"

Izustumi continues, "Because your body is still human." /End ID]

[ID: A panel from Dungeon Meshi showing Senshi (bearded humanoid wearing a horned helmate) talking to Chilchuck with a distressed Laios in the foreground.

Senshi says, "We need to closely monitor his food intake from now on so that things dont get out of hand."

He also says, tho the words are in the background of the panel and partly obscured, "Obesity is the result of an unhealthy lifestyle and it is a contributing factor to a number of diseases."

Laios says, "Wait just a second..." /End ID]

[bad268]

Ik it says no specific character but I am on my knees for sebastian montoya (mans gen z personified)COuld we get a driver reader and him and the reder inviting him to go to prom maybe beause he couldnt go to his?(Ik this is oddly specify and i am sorry you dont have to tdo this )

Drive Me to Prom? (Sebastian Montoya X Driver! Reader)

Fandom: RPF/Formula 2/3

Requested: Clearly (yo so the whole specific characters thing was so people would stop requesting characters I don't write for anymore, but anything regarding f1/2/3 drivers, I will DROP EVERYTHING FOR THEM lol)

Warnings: cheezy promposal

Pronouns: First POV (I/me), but fem-ish reader (wears dress mentioned but not actually talked about)

W.C. 1605

Summary: The reader tries to surprise Sebastian with a Prompoasl, but it does not go according to plan.

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~(^Google/Multiformula)

It was something really random to find out. While Sebastian and I were filming a video for the team’s YouTube channel, one of the questions asked about extracurriculars in school. It was a harmless question, really! But somewhere, somehow, we got on the topic of school dances.

“I was able to go to homecoming this year, and I think my prom is coming up soon,” I answered enthusiastically. 

“I never actually went to my prom,” Sebastian admitted. My head shot over to him, confused. He looked even more confused at my reaction, “What?”

“Two things,” I started, “One, you wanted to go to your prom? And two, you just decided not to go?”

“I mean it’s a standard thing with high school. I would have liked to go, I guess,” he laughed in response. The disappointment in the second half of his response was easy to detect, “And two, I also had a race the week of my prom. Even if I wanted to go, I couldn’t.”

Thus, the plan began. Since I knew my prom was going to be on a week we did not have a race, and I knew I wanted to go, I was going to ask Sebastian to prom (not like I would want to go with anyone else, but y’know).

The first thing I needed to do was coordinate with his parents and friends. His parents were more than willing to help, and they even volunteered to take him suit shopping inconspicuously. I said they didn't need to because the dress I found was a dark navy blue that matched perfectly with one of the suits he already owned. Then his friends were easy to convince. They were already busy visiting family as the date fell while we were on a break, so they had no problem with not making plans with Sebastian.

Next, I had to plan with the team. There was no way I was letting them schedule us for another last-minute, meaningless meeting during prom. They were (surprisingly) okay with it, as long as we agreed to come in two days later for a promotional video and simulator work which I had no problem with. 

Finally, the last thing I needed to do was ask him. I should not have been nearly as nervous as I was, but I wanted it to be perfect. I has so many ideas for how to ask him, but I knew I wanted to be cheesy and try to connect it to racing. I ended up deciding on a sign that I would take to the next race since we had one more race weekend before prom. The sign read, “Can you drive me to prom? I don't have my license.” I also printed pictures of our cars to put on the corners. It’s in reference to the fact that Sebastian has his normal driver’s license while I only have my super license. 

The race I decided to ask him was at Imola, one of our favorite tracks. We both qualified well (him at P1, me at P3), and I won the sprint race with Sebastian in P2. It was the first 1-2 of the season! We had a break between the podium and the media panel, so we were able to head back to our team trailer after a brief photo shoot. We both split off to different sides of the trailer to take showers and change into comfortable clothes. 

Sebastian immediately laid flat on the floor once he was done, and when I came out, he pulled me to lie next to him with a laugh. A couple of the staff chuckled at our antics, but let us be. 

“That was a pretty good race,” he said quietly with a yawn, “I don’t want to do interviews.”

“It was a great race, and you don't have to, technically,” I responded just as quietly. He looked skeptical before I elaborated, “You could just pay the fine if you really don’t want to go.”

“No, I just like whining about it,” he chuckled, pulling me deeper into his side as he buried his face in my hair. “Plus, I would never turn down a panel with you by my side.”

“You mean you by my side,” I laughed pulling away to make eye contact. “Last I checked, I was the one that won the race, Mr. Montoya.”

“Ah, right,” he joked, “We should actually start heading over now. We can pick up a smoothie or something on our way over. My treat for you winning fair and square.”

“Is that supposed to be condescending?” I joked back, moving to stand up and brush off my clothes. I held out my hand to help him up, him immediately taking it and standing up but not letting go as he pulled me into his chest for a hug. “Is this your apology?”

“No, the apology is that I’ll also get you a smoothie and food,” he responded, placing a kiss on my nose. “Did you put my wallet in your backpack earlier?”

“Yeah, you asked me too,” I chuckled, pulling away slightly to kiss him for a moment before moving back to point toward my driver’s room. “I need to grab my phone if you want to grab your wallet from my bag.”

“On it,” he said as he kept my hand in his and led us to the room. We split off, him grabbing my bag from the desk and me going toward the bathroom where I had my phone charging on the counter. Before I head back out, I checked a couple of notifications until Sebastian called out to me, “Hey, Y/N, what’s this?”

I walk out and see him reading something and I instantly know what it was: the poster. I immediately reached to grab it from him, hiding it behind my back despite knowing that he’s already seen it and read it. “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

“You were going to ask me to prom?” He asked in disbelief.

“I was going to do it after the race tomorrow,” I admitted, “but now it’s not a surprise.”

“Ask me now.”

“What?”

“I said,” he paused as he wrapped his arms around my waist, one arm pulling the sign out from behind my back, “Ask me now.”

“Seb, you didn’t get to go to your prom, and I have my prom next week. You have a driver’s license, and I only have my super license. Maybe you could drive me to prom?” I asked as I leaned back, still with his arms around my waist, and held the sign up. “And we can dance if you want to.”

“I could not imagine going with anyone else,” he laughed, pushing the sign down so he could kiss all over my face. We basked in the moment for a couple of minutes before hearing our managers calling our names. “I guess that’s our call, isn’t it?”

“I mean we could just not answer and sneak out the back,” I suggested, gesturing toward the door that lead to a staircase directly toward the pack of the paddock. “We could just take the fine.”

“Do you really want to pay the fine when we have no real reason to miss the interview?”

“Not really, but I am hungry, so I’m weighing my options.”

“Come on,” he chuckled as he pulled me toward the normal door, grabbing his wallet on the way and propping the sign up against the wall before walking out. When we got to the main section of the trailer, we found our managers talking on the phone. 

“Nevermind, we found them,” my manager said to the person on the call as they hung up. They both looked at us suspiciously before asking, “Do we want to know what you were doing in Y/N’s driver’s room together?”

“You say that like we did something wrong,” Sebastian pointed out. The look on our managers’ faces told us that they definitely thought we were doing something in there. “Wait, no we did not do what you think! The worse that we did was contemplate just taking the fine.”

“Okay, no,” his manager laughed, “we are not taking the fine. We were trying to find you because you need to do a post-race photoshoot and eat before the panel.”

“Oh, we already did the photo shoot,” I pointed out. “We did it before we showered and changed. Plus, we were just about to head out to get smoothies.”

“Make sure you get real food too, please? The last thing we need is one of you passing out during the interview. You’ve got 2 hours!”

“Got it,” Sebastian shouted behind him as we already started running out of the trailer toward the array of food stands. We slowed down once we reached a shaded table off to the side of one of the stands. Sebastian pulls out my chair, allowing me to sit first before pushing it in and taking the seat across from me. “Looks like we’ve got extra time to kill, so what do you want to get? My treat.”

“Is that supposed to be condescending?” I joked, leaning forward in my seat.

“Shut up or I won't buy you anything,” he pressed with an eye-roll. “Now, what do you want?”

“Well-” I started.

“No, don’t turn this on me,” he immediately interrupted, “I’m trying to congratulate you on your win.”

“And I want a smoothie, so you choose the actual food!” I retorted. “Second place is not easy either, so you choose the food.”

“You’re a menace.”

“I try.”

~~~~~

© BAD268 2023. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[russetfoxfur]

so i dont usually do liveblogs because i never show up to streams and also im not very good at reacting to stuff. However. i will make an exception because HGCZ IS OUT!! and i have seen so much hype about it that id be a fool to not at least read it. livereact will be under the cut for spoilers and. stuff.

- ok we arent even on the actual ZINE and the opening dedication?? "Of the arts, storytelling is one of the oldest: humanity weaves an endless tapestry of heart, hope, and home that continues to shape us all to this day. To tell a story is to bridge the gap between yesterday and tomorrow; to tell a story is to inextricably connect us all." THAT OPENING PARAGRAPH DUDE

- interesting premise. im intrigued. though i am a little concerned about the "classist violence" and "body modification" warnings. I suspect this is not all Fun and Games

- "I gotta say, "Hot"Guy, this is pretty disappointing. You can be AverageGuy. MediocreGuy." "Oh! "Guy"!" the best part is this is so in-character for them to do

- the ENTIRE EXPLANATION bit omg. joel trying to interject and comic-style getting talked over, lizzie robbing cats instead of cash... and her backstory...

- i. that sudden style shift is not in fact comical and i am now eyeing the unreality warning at the beginning of the zine with sudden alarm. should i be alarmed by this? maybe this is fine. lets say its fine

- JELLIE! hcing her supername is HotCat. she DEFINITELY needs a matching HotGuy costume. and i am somewhat more reassured!

- wait hold on. went back to that first hotguy comic to see the warnings (hidden in the title, missed them) and. WAIT WAS THAT REWRITING FUCKIN MIND CONTROL

- UNREALITY MINDCONTROL SCOPOPHOBIA AND INJURY??? WAIT HOLD ON IM REREADING THIS

- wait. WAIT THAT PANEL. THAT ONE WHERE JOEL SEES HOTGUY REWROTE THE ANIMAL CONTROL VAN TO BE A MONEY VAN. WAIT A FUCKING SECOND WE ARENT EVEN TEN PAGES INTO THE ZINE AND HOLY SHIT

- joels the only one who can SEE HES DOING THIS SO HOTGUY WRITES HIM OUT. JESUS FUCKIN CHRIST. HOTGUY??? UFHODQPHFWJPFAP AND THEN HE "GOES BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD" AND FUCKIN REWRITES REALITY TO MAKE HIMSELF SEEM COOLER. BUT REWRITTEN HOTGUY HAS THE SAME PLASTIC EXPRESSION. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST THIS IS ONLY ONE COMIC I THINK YOURE LYING ABOUT HIS SUPERPOWER MUTATION WHATEVER

- ALRIGHT SWIFTLY ON. WE WILL EYE HOTGUY WITH CONCERN BUT MOVE ON NONETHELESS

- :0 cuteguy appears! doody did rlly good work on this one!

- CUTEGUY IS AWESOME!!! those WINGS... agh i love comic bubbles they just have so much personality and those icy words... and cuteguy pointing HOTGUYS OWN ARROW back at him..... you could not have made a better introduction holy shit

- and then he just flies off. awesome. we should all aspire to be the same level of cool as cuteguy.

- ren would be able to just say hotguy like that. also sidenote i am hearing all these lines in my head as im reading so writers youve all done fantastically!

- UNIONIZE! UNIONIZE! UNIONIZE!

- is pearl... a journalist? or is this the wrong gal? if she is a journalist then good for her!

- oh :( everyone hates unionizing the vigelantes. sad but realistic :(

- MUMBLR?? DID MUMBO K JUMBO BECOME THE OWNER OF TUMBLR IN THIS AU? DID HE KILL MATT PHOTOSPACE WHOEVER THE CEO OF TUMBLR IS? DID THEY FISTFIGHT TO THE DEATH? THAT HAPPENED RIGHT. THATS THE ONLY THING ILL ACCEPT AS CANON. IN THIS AU MUMBLR IS TRANS-FRIENDLY! 🎉

- sweetferaline (bahm bahm bahhh)

- ok this is incredibly funny. teeth dog ftw

- CHATTER AND M JESUS CHRIST THIS IS NOW THE BEST SEGMENT IN THE ENTIRE ZINE. AMAZING COMEBACK THIS IS SO REALISTIC

- and the reply sections are always a cesspool! glad they got that right

- PIXLRIFFS RUNNING A BLOG ON TUMBLR TO EXPLAIN HERMITOPIA. THIS IS SO IN CHARACTER

- THE MAPLE PRINCE. THE MAPLE PRINCE

- THIS ENTIRE MUMBLR DASH WAS PURE COMEDY GOLD. FIVE OUT OF FIVE STARS & HATS OFF TO THE WRITER

- ARIANA GRIANDE!!!! WOOOOO <3 <3 WE LOVE YOU GRIANDE!!!!!

- and now permit office grian! we are going through so many different iterations of grian... imagine we get poultry man next

- is that GEM??? IS GEM A VILLAIN? also i dont really know who the hippies are... idk its just hard for me to recognize this artstyle ig

- WAIT. HAS GEM BEEN SPYING ON GRIAN'S DETECTIVITY? or am i just reading this all wrong? i might be reading this all wrong

- alright i might have to reread that one-- WAIT MORE MIND CONTROL. AND BODY MODIFICATION??? THE MISSING CUB... guys if this is sculk!cub im gonna maul someone

- AAAA BEHIND YOU HOTGUY (i called it)

- also love how i instantly went "oh a tibbycaps comic!"

- ok i LOVE this panel where they figure out Arson. the way both conclusions are reached in tandem! and also YAY WOOO ARSON THIS BITCH UP 🔥

- OH MY GOD THIS IS HILARIOUS I LOVE HOW THE abrupt cut to disaster WAS DONE IN COMIC FORM

- THAT MERCH DESIGN IN THE NOTES APP ABSOLUTELY FUCKING SENT ME DUDE

- "i use sculk to season my pizza" ah. I see. typical cubfan behavior. carry on

- "None of us are perfect, despite what you say might feel when you look at me" this Bdubs email is SO IN-CHARACTER

- " i replied to some of these but then i kinda got bored and started sending links to cool space facts instead" honestly this is what i would do too. and i would be happy to get cool space facts in return for my hotguy email. i dont see what the issue is here

- oh is cuteguy taking issues with the supernovae. skill issue tbh

- this whole cuteguy-cub email chain is HILARIOUS. scratch that this whole email segment is hilarious jesus christ. grian is being SO BITCHY and im HERE FOR IT

- PEARLIPOP IS A REPORTER! YES! and zedaphs in this au! he isnt even going under wormman??? shocking (< says a zedaph fangirl who is completely fixated on one passing mention of him)

- oh my god this is the best storytelling format ever. the panicked exchanges between cuteguy n cub, pearl reporting as she is wont to do... genuinely i love this so much i am giggling so much im actually gonna stop liveblogging because i just want to read this. ill be with yall in a moment

- actually never mind "if he waits too long to answer it starts to play the whole Lilo and Stitch movie audio" cub i love you so much. hgcz i love you so much i almost forgive you for that very jarring first comic

- it looks like we have seven or so more years before hotguy becomes a reality... new reasons to live. also the chatter discourse is insane from what ive seen doc does just act Like That on twit/chatter

- "sumagram" well i guess we know who owns that now

- :000 HOTCAT APPEARS!!!!! WE LOVE YOU HOTCAT <3333333 EVERYONE GIVE IT UP FOR OUR BELOVED HOTCAT!!!

- THE AWKWARD EXIT. i love it

- I SEE THAT BIG SALMON DONT THINK I DONT

- SHIRTLESS SCAR.... im aroace but like. i can still admire a shirtless man cant i. artist did a good job

- NO YOU DID NOT PUT A LILACS AND POPPIES REFERENCE IN THIS COMIC I AM GNAWING THE ARTIST OF THIS COMIC WITH MY TEETH YOU ARE MAKING ME INSANE DEAR GOD THEY TEAMED UP BUT HOW IS THIS GOING TO END AAAAAA HOTGUY DONT DIE IN THE CACTUS RING PLEASE BUDDY

- CREEPER AW MAN

- horsegirl hotguy... wild stallion cuteguy... someone needs to write this au. i should write this au. actually hold on *scribbles furiously in my "crackfic ideas" notes* carry on

- update: now listening to scheming weasel for atmosphere.

- “Who’s the more foolish: the fool, or the fools who follow him?” stellar line. only a certified HotGuy can produce lines like these

- "after a tick or two" if hermitopians measure time in ticks like minecrafters do then thats such a cool worldbuilding detail

- FOR A MOMENT I THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO BURN DOC AND HIS LACKEYS ALIVE. THANK GODS THEY DIDNT

- testing of new weapons montage! i know hotguy is the star of the show here but god i love cub so much more. can cub be the "protagonist" here instead actually

- i. i have suspicions that cub is not sculk-free. or is this a flutterbat situation where it is all dealt with but its not but actually it is but it also kinda isnt? yknow. im gonna write this off as a flutterbat thing but i will still be keeping a very close eye on cub

- *snort* deep enough to hold twelve pieces of bamboo (i am such a sucker for in-jokes)

- grian is warming up to scar... also hotguy bandaids

- AND I GET THAT REFERENCE TOO!! very clever! grian shut up its two in the morning! "Scar doesn’t seem to know how to react, his mouth falling open and then promptly shutting again." same grian why would you bring up the nose hair incident and to an unsuspecting hotguy no less smh learn sone manners

- you know what if grian can learn first aid from the nose hair incident in alaska then scar can get injured in a volleyball incident (i have never watched scar which yes is a skill issue but also if this is also a reference i would not get it). beloved desertduo who cannot lie to save their fuckin lives

- THAT ENDING COMIC IS HILARIOUS. SUCH A SCAR THING TO DO

- alright im gonna take a break from liveblogging rn! i will be back in (my) morning with scheming weasel and a renewed spirit. goodnight yall! <3

[majorproblems77]

Recalled update! So I am here to yell about it for 30 minutes thanks :)

*Scrambling to escape the void that has consumed me over the last few weeks.*

HI, ITS ME

Okay, so we've got a recalled update! Im very excited and have been pouring over this update for a while.

Uni is consuming my life haha.

they are headed towards the castle while having some very important discussions. Mainly, what on earth do we call you all. (Which in its own right I find amusing haha. )

Okay, time for the important things! Recalled and all panels belong to @recalled11 and its wonderful artist @l3ominor. Go check it out!

You can find the comic page here!

Now lets get started because if i dont scream about my blorbo in approximately 5 seconds I'm gonna die

I love group photos of any Calabar, it's awesome to see them all together. And watching fabrics flow is detail that I am obsessed with thank you.

ALSO HIS WIFE AHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM

Its the blorbo, look at hims.

Also i love how chill he is about this. Like, 'oh more problems? Awesome, I needed something to do today' kind of vibe I love it.

Sky's walking stick! I love how inclusive of all sorts of things this AU is i thoroughly enjoy it. He gives me the I can kill you with this walking stick, but also have you met my wife vibes and i love him.

Time and Malon running off like this brings me great joy i love them.

And, sky. Are we talking about your journey or something else cause that's pretty ominous there. foreshadowing? Are we gonna get more about the past of these heroes at one point I'd love to know more about them.

It is a massive Hyrule, espically when you think about just how long it takes to get across each of them in-game. Wild's game it actually takes so long to get across even just Hyrule field.

Time please step back from the edge you're giving me anxiety.

Also backgrounds my beloved. Beautiful i love them.

PFFFFFFT

OMG

When i tell you i was laughing at this for a few minutes i mean it oh my god this is wonderful.

And Malon?! OMG

I find this so damn funny. Its wonderful.

Im so glad everyone is confused it makes this 10x funnier.

(You think when they get to know each other better he'll let Sky/Sun have a go? I would love to see that so much.)

Also seeing Wild smile, Like really smile. The boy deserves the world.

Im glad he's having fun. Its also great to see Zonai tech being used after the events of the 2nd game like this.

Yes, let's step into the wooden box of who knows what together? It'll be fun! :D

Flower, you gotta remember that these people have never seen this sort of thing, please explain.

Like you're doing right now flower? Like you're doing right now?

Everyone is so trusting of this box. I love it.

Just gonna say how GENIUS this is? LIKE A LIFT USING ZONAI WHEELS

I LOVE IT

This tells a lot

Sky is just impressed, look at how happy he is. Wonderful bean

Sun is hanging out, (Is she holding his hand? Thats cute) :D

Captain the professional as always.

Malon and Time are the absolute chaos of the group. Just look at them, Time has obviously never seen something like this and so him being the one who's like basically fallen over here makes so much sense.

Got me cackling again tho, I love this group of idiots a healthy amount.

Them <3

I was thinking about it tho... And the sailcloths they are identical. And we know they are married...

What if the sailcloths are a sign of marriage in this universe? Why else would they both have the same one, down to the blue outline on the edge that is closest to them. Like you give your lover a meaningful symbol to show your love for them, and in Sky's case he made a sailcloth for sun after she made the one he's wearing for him during the events of Skyward sword.

I think its the same one because his one looks significantly bigger than hers, which to me tells of a practical use as well as a decorative or symbolic piece. 332

Like im probably reading too much into this but then again. They are so cute that they would actually do that.

Captain pulling the absolute shenanigans of a group back on track. He is the brain cell of the group you can't change my mind.

HE CALLS HER SUNSHINE AHHHHHH

I LOVE THEM

THESE TWO MEAN EVERYTHING TO ME

Why is everyone in this comic so damn adorable okay, these guys are just cinnamon rolls who saved the world.

Just look at Time's face? You can't tell me he isn't the most cinnamon of the rolls.

AWWWWWWWWW

Have I mentioned how much I love Captain? Cause he is just so chill, but also professional. Professionally chill? Sure.

I can see a stressful situation coming up, and he just is the stoic leader who gets everyone in line and ready to fight the threat.

And flower, Who is just so sweet. I can understand not wanting to be referred to as princess now that their Hyrule is like how it is. I'm surprised this hasn't come up sooner. But it's cute.

Oh the silent princess. How symbolic you are.

I know people are not really into the flower thing but I am, you think we will see some nightshade at one point?

The flower.

The 2 flower heads, one open, one closed, The blue into white. With the yellow detail. It's Flowers colour pallet to a T and I love it. Maybe as we progress through the story we will see pictures of the silent princess again but with a flowering bud or maybe if something bad happens a slightly sad looking one?

I am obsessed with symbolism, so if those become a thing watch this space cause I will be excited about it!

(In fact looking at it I think, the stem in the middle and the yellow on her clothes are colour-matched. A nice detail!)

Okay thats all from me! :D

Have a great day/Night!

[sleepsentry]

Hi hello I just popped by to tell you just how much I absolutely LOVE your art. The dynamic poses, the color, your shapes, you’re very much an inspiration to me for my own art. I was curious if you’d be willing to share your own inspirations/process in drawing? No need to if you don’t feel like it though. Again, thank you for sharing your art with the world.

Gosh, I'm not sure where I'd even start for that...

I don't think I can get into process atm because it changes so much in such tiny ways all the time. I have a basic skeleton of a process, but the rest is all over the place.

As for insperations:

I follow many many artists online and have picked up many small things just from looking at their work and trying to "reverse engineer" their process in my head.

I've noticed I tend to subconsciously "study" artists just by thinking "how do I draw this? Oh this artist drew it that way! Lemme try..." and I do that many many times while drawing.

Example: I look at the way an artist draws hands, then I look at my own hand and try and mimick the position in the artwork.

I study both and try to connect the dots between them. I feel the way my hand moves and the way the bones and muscles flex and relax.

I try and draw broad shapes, then the underlying mechanics of the hand, then I finish things by drawing what we actually end up seeing on the surface.

I dont draw the bones and muscles of a hand and then the skin just to be clear! I just try and keep them in mind as a draw the outlines.

Like a sculpture having a "skeleton" made of two bits or wire. I don't draw the skeleton, I draw the rough blueprint of where everything goes in quick simple lines. Then I build the "clay" on top.

I don't go that in depth every time but it helps to stop and "be more considered" if you have the time and energy.

Now that I think about it, watch sculpting videos!

It's a very similar process to drawing but 3d instead of 2D! I recommend clay sculpture but I'm sure 3d modeling has similar principles too, even if a very different approach overall.

Here are some channels I recommend:

For cute character dioramas with ridiculous fidelity while being very stylised

For impressive fake food that really shows just how much of an illusion art is

For amazing Dino statues with an eye for detail and convincing naturalism

For 2d artists I follow current professional and/or hobby artists, or even old masters who's work is archived in artbooks and social media accounts. All ranging a wide variety or styles, cute, horror, cartoon, realist, ect... and most importantly, the styles wich aren't as easily definable.

The variety of influences is great! As long as you figure out how to pick and dissect the elements that drew you to the work and how to apply your findings to your own work.

My biggest inspirations as a kid where animation (Disney, pixar, ghibli, ect...), manga, Belgian/French comics my dad had as a kid.

I didn't have the patience or means to learn to animate, but these comics had so much life and motion in their panels! I always found American comics really stiff and more difficult to read because of the detail and "realism". I know American comic art can be very expressive and fluid, but for my undiagnosed eye/brain issues...

This:

Was leagues more "readable" than:

They where literally easier to read.

That comic cover takes me a good few seconds to dissect and process, whereas the two examples above it are instant.

I'm terrible at studying from life due to my poor eyesight and spacial awareness issues, also I have ADHD so, not only is the information my eyes are giving to my brain suboptimal, but my brain is also terrible at processing and reconstructing that information.

Also tracing is a valid way of studying btw, that's how I learnt as a tot and it can be great to try and reverse engineer a finished peice and break it down to it's construction.

Obviously it's not the same as building something from scratch but we're talking within the realms of practice.

I also started trying to "re-learn" some art fundamentals in ways that work better for me, and it's been massively helpful.

I'm already working with fuzzy simplified abstractions of the world around me, so it's horrible trying to see accurately and THEN re-simplify it onto paper.

So something that has helped a lot and I mean A LOT with teaching my brain art basics in a digestible, step by step way, has been:

ART ACADEMY for the DS!

It's great for walking you through art fundamentals in a way that is digestible and no where near as overwhelming as just jumping straight in to a massive, complex, digital art programme.

It gets all the fuss of materials and subject and reference out of the way and let's you just focuse purely on the process of making art itself.

THIS:

WAS MADE WITH THIS:

This is the first drawing lesson:

This is the lesson after that:

This is all with the original DS version!

On a tiny screen with very primitive approximations of pressure sensitivity and no opacity or pen size options.

It mimics traditional art making in the sense that you make what you can with what you have and that limitation allows you to focuse on practice rather than get overwhelmed and over correct everything digitally.

These where tiny, crunchy, microcosmic, simplifications of digital art making back in 2009!!!

It's so refreshingly accessible and manageable.

I haven't even started the newer 3ds game that came out.

So if anyone reading is struggling with their art I highly recommend this little art exercise giver! It's helped me a lot.

OK hope that's readable and helpful. ^^

[suckishima]

haikyuu rewatch s01e02

episode 2 wheee. i dont remember the actual details of the rest of season one as clearly as i did episode 1, i think its been 4ish years since ive properly sat down and watched each episode so this will be interesting from here on out, im excited!

lmao interesting that the first thing the camera zooms in on when hinata sees kageyama in the gym for the first time is his shoes??? and then the "karasuno" on his school pe uniform and THEN his face? were his shoes an iconic identifier to hinata?? lmaooo

rules for myself on this (or any tbh) rewatch: never skip the intro songs

i have such a special place in my heart for "imagination." it has unlocked something in my soul

honestly its such a compliment that kageyama remembers hinata, especially when we see into his thoughts a bit here and the things he remembers arent that hinata was some who cried about beating him next time they see each other, but rather he remembers hinatas crazy athletic ability and how much it irked kageyama that hinata wasnt living up to his potential lmao

this is the first indication we get that kageyama doesnt like being called 'king.' in the first ep hinata call him king to his face and kageyama doesnt react at all, but here it bothers him immediately. which of course, makes sense bc The Incident hadnt happened yet when they first met and now it has, but interesting to notice now bc i dont think i caught on to the difference my first time through. i dont think most people would lol and its a nice attention to detail

lmaooo tanaka already making faces

and whyyyy is hinata skirting around like hes trying to herd them like sheep?? ashjaska

hmmm translation error or dialogue error that tanaka is calling all three of them third years? my japanese isnt good enough to tell hmm. just checked the manga panel and its more like hes telling suga to show more 'third year intimidation' rather than including himself in that like the show's subs do. probably a translation thing where it was vague in terms of who it was referring to and that was the interpretation they went with before its confirmed that tanaka is a second year

awww yeah its nice that suga daichi and tanaka remember hinata too!! i wonder if they talked about that match afterwords lmao

"youre way short and sucked bad, but you've got guts!" "thanks!" lmaoooooo

ive never watched the dub but ive seen a few compilation videos and i cant look at this face tanaka's making and think anything other than 'cojones' lmaooo

'youve trained at this with the old ladies' ajkhsajks

waaaahhhh moment of silence for all the beautiful serve/spike pencil sketch animations that we'll never see again. you were so gorgeous and we loved you so much, im sorry youre gone

hinata slides in so quickkkkk for that receive, and ive always loved how slick and epic it looks only for the ball to immediately ricochet up into his face l m a o so good

vp's cinematic cheek ripple and flying wig is just a bonus lol

ooooo more small detail! the shot of the vp's bald head where hinata is surprised kageyama couldnt tell the hair was fake - hinata has all these little red marks on his face where the ball hit him!! nice!

also daichi is so resigned when he takes the wig off his head lmaoo

aww ive never noticed these quick shots of young daichi walking thinking about going to karasuno, cute!

the way they both immediately start begging to be let in and like 'just tell me how to be teammates ill do it!!' they love vb more than anything, they just wanna playy

kajhsaksa and kageyama literally pushing hinata away before declaring that he'll get along with him 😭 bro has no idea how to get along

"let me ask you something. are you actually stupid?" baksjhagsas hes so genuineeee, and hes right aghsajsa

oooooooo yesss love this wide shot of team practicing block follows only to pan out past the bars of the window to show hinata watching from outside yessss

"if i can play volleyball, i'll endure anything" 😭

right.. the unnecessary anime-only shimizu ""fanservice"" shots. furudate would never (and did never). interesting that this sort of thing never really happens again after a certain point. i always wondered if they realized their core audience wasnt here for that kind of thing at all so they dropped it (and bc like i said,,, its not in the manga lmao. the closest thing is the nishinoya/kanoka thing and the saeko/yachi jealousy thing and both of those are 1 for humor rather than sexualization and 2 make sense for the characters whereas this anime moment is literally just the camera being a creep for no reason lol) (you CANNOT convince me it's meant to be kageyama's pov checking her out. possibly hinata would but im still doubtful lol)

the first appearance of tanaka's big ear lmao, love that this becomes a thing whenever he's overhearing

gotta love how passionate kageyama is about being setter, fully talking with his hands lol

how did i not fall in love with tanaka sooner, i thought he was so weird and meh my first time through. i was so wrong lmao. look at him initiating them to come early to use the gym, and showing up TWO HOURS early himself with the keys??? i love himm

okay thats about it for this one, lots of fun this ep! i always forget how ridiculous the wig part is lmao, the series loses a bit of that completely over the top silliness as it goes on, but it gains humor in other ways just through the character dynamics that feel a bit more real imo so not a real loss personally

[exquisitelyrandom]

hi i know one of them is kinda old but if you're okay with it i would love to do a fic of either of these tacophone comics of yours, maybe even both (with credit ofc)

https://www.tumblr.com/exquisitelyrandom/690825927273463808/draw-something-tacophone-related-and-if-you-dont

https://www.tumblr.com/exquisitelyrandom/713112801221263360/angst-because-the-sillies-are-on-my-mind-again

oh my god ofc you can w credit holy sh

YES!!!! AAUGQHZHHQ I'D LOVE FOR YOU TO!!!!! yuo have no idea how much I've been looking for reading content of them plsplspslsplspls

btw where would you be posting the story? I'd love to read it,, if you do make a fic of them, please tag me/send me a link!! ^^

going into small detail abt the ideas behind the comics below because im insane abt them vvv

they're actually very similar to each other so they may as we 🐝 connected/have the same situation lmao

first comic is leaning more on mic's. side

;After getting into the hotel, she's. absolutely miserable but keeps trying to pretend she's fine (she is not). Of course, Soap and the others notice her mood and one of them eventually get to talk to her about it. But even as she does open up, she never outs Taco. Ever. And blames it on the contest. Soap/Whoever confronted her knows it isn't true, but doesn't push further. After the talk, Mic basically just sits there and contemplates, before deciding """past is past""". Eventually, she starts thinking about the whole thing less, and she's smiling a lot more the next few days/weeks. Er. Until. That one night.

The second comic - or, in both comics - , here's Taco's side

There was actually gonna be more similar..things.. in both of the panels i put up above,, but i decided they'd look too similar to each other so Taco looks angrier in the second one

It all starts when Mic walks through the portal. Yeah. She didn't expect that. Taco's not someone to be caught off guard; her moves are calculated, and she knows the outcome of something even before it had a chance to start. She's memorized the puzzles and patterns on an object's mind, knows how to use it to her advantage - knows how to manipulate it into what she needs it to do. So why was it that she..?

She's teleported to their little spot, and her emotions are. overwhelming. At first, she feels.. sad. Distraught. Distraught that Mic left. Then, she feels.. angry. Angry at Mic for even leaving without any further word. Angry at Mic to have the AUDACITY to blame ..her. And she's angry.. at herself. Then, she's sad again. Her mind goes back to the words Microphone last spoke to her, and it stings, just as much as when she first heard them, if not more. She sits on the log -[soft thud]- oh, nevermind, she's on her knees in the soft grass, head in hands. She grips her shell tight and tries to shout, to let out the scream that's been trying to claw its way out of her throat, to get all of the overwhelming thoughts out of her head, but all she can manage is a choked sob, her throat tightening as she curled into herself.

And I'm only now realizing I'm getting WAY too carried away so fast forward everyone:

Taco thinks back on all the mistakes she's made, and back at one of her.. biggest mistakes yet. And, after a while, she decides she's done running, and she's not letting her slip from her grasp that easily. Not again. Not like him.

So, she writes, and writes, and writes, and writes. Until, after over fifty crumpled papers and about three half empty cups of - now cold - tea, she's finished. A letter to Microphone. She spilled her heart out on it, not leaving a single detail on everything she's done, opening herself up completely to the object never expected to break down years worth of built up walls. She's a little hesitant as she sends it to the hotel's mail, and then she waits.

She doesn't respond. Its not the first time. She takes a deep breath. No, she's not letting it faze her. She needs Mic to see she's being genuine. Why couldn't you be genuine from the start? When she most needed you to be?

She sends another letter, this time, directly into her room. She drops it through the little window, and she runs off before anyone notices her. A week passes. She doesn't respond again. She doesn't give up. She sends another letter, and another, and another, and another..

Two months has passed since then - has it really been that long? - And she's on the floor, miserable. The cracks have gotten worse and she can barely see with her right eye, she can barely stand, and her knees feel weak. Her head feels heavy, and her mind goes back to quiet picnics, white bowties and purples hues. And it just.. hurts. It hurts. It hurts, so much and she doesn't want it to. It hurts, and she's angry. Angry at herself for even considering to leave Microphone after they get the million. She's angry at herself for not paying attention to what may have caused the whole thing. Angry at herself slipping up the one good thing she had.

Did you ever have her?

She's angry at herself for being the reason Microphone left.

She feels lightheaded, yet her head feels heavy. And she's so, so tired.. she blacks out

The next thing she knows, she's on her way to ..hotel oj.

Uh oh

so um when I said "small detail" i may have.. lied HEJHSJQJZNNQJXN I WAS GENUINELY GOING TO JUST DESCRIBE MY IDEA FOR THE COMIC IM OSRRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY i had many things to say about tacoy

YOU DONT HAVE TO FOLLOW THROUGH W THE PLOT I'd love to see ur take on the comic!! Ignore my gay little writings hehr

[girlofwonder]

wanted to re-read wonder woman #5 to get panels to edit.. but i can't get through it. this is gonna go down as one of the worst iterations of either character ever…. rant below: spoilers obviously.

the only good thing about this run is that the amazons are gorgeous. tom king keeps pushing this idea that the amazons are spiteful & hateful towards each other & do nothing but fight like they haven’t been… established as the pinnacles / stepping stones of peace & compassion for 70 years; like they don't constantly uplift each other even during / with their differences. the inconsistencies are insane. like diana would disrespect someone she’s called SISTER & FRIEND like that. like she would FIGHT her sister WILLINGLY. like diana would hate having a sidekick whilst also being the reason yara has that fucking tiara on her head & being the reason why donna & cassie got a second-chance at family & community. & like yara would disrespect the beacon of peace she's trying to live up to one day.

everyone is just so out of character for the sake of 'shock value' & this is piss-poor excuse of a gender - war but it's not even good nor shocking. ( & we’re not even going to get into the random ass language change bc… we can all see a white man’s writing from a mile away right ? like we know.. )

i do not understand why he was given this title in the first place.. when he has expressed LOUDLY that he didn't want to write nor likes wonder woman nor her fans. & then he's allowed to take a crack at ALL THE WONDERFAM & write them all POORLY. like???

LIKE WHAT???? ARE??? WE???? TALKING???? ABOUT????? OLD FOOL???? OLD LADY???? HUH????? YARA BLEEDING FROM AN ARROW WHEN SHE HAS THICKER SKIN THAN THAT?

DIANA GLOATING???? I DONT GET IT. ITS SO DISAPPOINTING.

[calechipconecrimes]

ok we begin. btw you dont have a .tumblr.com and thats pretty cringe maybe get that worked out worstie.

anyway we start with the

✨ fabulous killjoys ✨

they're the main characters of the ALBUM danger days. also referred to as the fab four. they are members of the larger group simply called the killjoys, played a key role in the analog wars (we'll get to it) and take care of the girl (we'll get to her) the fab four's whole deal is eloquently described by straengeaeons as "they hate capitalism and blow stuff up about it." they're portrayed by the members of mcr in the music videos so ill go ahead and introduce them to u now since their names are decently important going forward we got

party poison - leader of the fab four, he's the only one to have two different masks (the whole masks thing we'll get to later), both pictured above, the second ones called the mousekat store that in ur brainhole not really sure if i'll mention it later. also definitely the one im going to write the most about because spoiler alert these idiots die in like 10 minutes and they dont have a ton of personality to go off of unless you wanna start theorizing hard and i dont feel like that right now

jet star - helpfully labeled for your convenience

fun ghoul - you can't see it well but his mask is like....a really shitty party city zombie mask.

kobra kid - i think its pretty widely accepted fanon that he and party poison are brothers since they're portrayed by mikey and gerard in the music videos. neat.

alongside the fab four we got some other important people (im also going to start using comic panels for these guys cuz the fab four dont have any great comic pictures)

korse - he works as a s/c/a/r/e/c/r/o/w for BLind (better living industries) who have basically taken over the world or at least north america to our knowledge. their capital in a sense is battery city. dont think i mentioned it but this all takes place in post apocalyptic 2019 (the album came out in 2010 ok) around where la is today. anyway back to korse scarecrows are basically really deadly assassins and hes a bit silly. slightly murderous. its ok though he's gay and gets a redemption arc.

dr. death defying - he shows up a bit in the mvs but the pics arent great so im just using comic. hes a dj and has close ties to the fab four, also is vaguely possibly omnipotent? hes a veteran of the analog wars and all around chill great guy. love dr d.

cherri cola - also a dj, has this like. chill uncle energy that matches dr ds very well. really wants to be a dad like so bad. he was a part of the og killjoys with the fab four but didnt die with them and has a little tiny bit of survivors guilt abt that. just a smidge. i like him hes cool

the girl - she doesnt have a name lmao just the girl. very important small child, she's like 6 at the time when the fab four die. her mom was like the leader of the resistance group the killjoys were part of during the analog wars and party poison at least believes that she's going to save them all someday. also the comic panel is her when shes like 16 hence the fact that she looks violently different

the director - shes the head of BLind so like. very evil. but shes also kinda hot so i forgive the capitalism and the war crimes. uhhh other than that there's draculoids which are these guys with the masks

the masks basically mind control ppl to make them BLinds personal cannon fodder im kinda tired so i might continue this later and actually get into plot but other than stuff i want to talk abt later im pretty sure thats all you'd need to get into the mvs at least

so this is a whole thing huh

[daedalusdavinci]

jason todd

send me a character and ill answer

1: sexuality headcanon

hes! aro! ace! suck my dick about it!

2: otp

its. j@yroy listen dont talk to me ok i know

3: brotp

dick and jason all the way im so crazy about them

4: notp

BATCST!!!! STOP IT!!!!

5: first headcanon that pops into my head

i do think hes autistic yes

6: favorite line from this character

i answer this question all the time we already know there are so many good jason panels and im tired of writing ids rn just scroll back through my asks a little

7: one way in which I relate to this character

the frustration, the grief, the demand for bruce to just LOOK at him and SEE him, that kind of stubborn anger is so. yeah.

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character

every time he tries dating someone it hurts me so bad. also the pillhead. gags.

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

problematic fave but he did nothing wrong to me <333

[thenixkat]

[This Post contains spoilers for the end of Dungeon Meshi]

Chapter 97, pg 8

[ID: A panel from Dungeon Meshi showing Chilchuck (short humanoid in a dark top), Izutsumi (cat person; only the back of her head is visible), and Laios (tall humanoid, in this panel depicted as fat as an imagined scenario) with the words 'Human's Body' behind his head.

Chilchuk says, "That means you're gonna gain a ton of weight,"

Izustumi continues, "Because your body is still human." /End ID]

Oh no. SO tragic. Our hero might get a bit fat from having an insatiable demon appetite. Truely we should be worried about him putting on some weight and not rupturing his organs due to eating more than his stomach can hold b/c he literally can't feel full.

[ID: A panel from Dungeon Meshi showing Senshi (bearded humanoid wearing a horned helmate) talking to Chilchuck with a distressed Laios in the foreground.

Senshi says, "We need to closely monitor his food intake from now on so that things dont get out of hand."

He also says, tho the words are in the background of the panel and partly obscured, "Obesity is the result of an unhealthy lifestyle and it is a contributing factor to a number of diseases."

Laios says, "Wait just a second..." /End ID]

Ok. Cool. Cooool. Cool. Yes yall should be monitoring Laios' intake to make sure he doesn't become obese (which in Laios' case with his current overweight BMI would only mean gaining about 30 or so more pounds) b/c we don't want him to get fat b/c that's harmful to his health automatically in every context because being fat is bad and unhealthy always. And not b/c he could literally rupture an organ and very quickly die b/c he can't feel full.

Cool. Cool. Remember folks to have a good relationship with food, eat properly, get in moderate exercise, and don't be fat. That's a great message to end this on.

But also if Senshi is so knowledgeable of the dangers of obesity, why doesn't he change his unhealthy lifestyle, monitor his food intake better, and drop some weight himself. Since, with that BMI of 36 his ass is obese. Class II obese even.

Come on Senshi, you can reduce. Drop all that fat. Trim the excess muscle. Reduce the density and thickness of your bones. Come on, you can achieve a healthier BMI for someone your height and age if you try hard enough.

[gangstalia]

hi hetalia fandom how are we doing Btw gangs talia au germany exists and i love him so much himaruya drew him so cunty like Boy………. hima drew his tits so defined i know the au came out like 3 months ago but i am still obsessed with germany as if his design came out 3 seconds ago???????? i really like how hima drew his whole face n hair its just aahhhbbbb i don’t know what i like about it but i know i do love it

also i said this already but HIS BODY??? his body is so tea holy shit . peep him on the top right of the first image/panel like ???? i know he’s stretching but HIS SIDEEEE👅👅👅 ouughhh he’s so big /nsx im so normal about him . and then the little page we get where he’s wet in the rain??? i don’t think i need to explain why i like it but i will Um anyway everything. let me start with his HAIR oh my God his HAIR is crave more scenes either in the anime or in the manga where his hair is down and i m so happy himaruya delivered with this many months ago and then his face OIUYGGHH there is something about germany’s constantly serious and or stern face that makes me go Crazy but in this little page specifically it does Things to my brain …… and then i think it’s obvious why i like his clothes and or body but like yayyyy i love it when his curves if you could call it that? maybe it’s not curves nvm maybe like. his muscles yeah that is a better word ^_^ i love it when his muscles are exaggerated or just shown more (e.g tight clothes/no clothes as in like a shirt off or something) and maybe it’s just cause i am very very new to the fandom so i haven’t experienc3 it yet but has anyone ever talked about how amazing germany’s legs are . like i dont expect every post to be praising or loving on germany /gen but idk if its ever been talked about and if it hasn’t then i will talk about how much i want to be crushed like that spoon america abolished with his bare hands in world stars anime but instead of americas hands and with a spoon i want it to be germany’s horribly thick thighs and with my head or just any part of me. i would let him shatter my lifeblood and very soul with those plump legs on him. and for a less vulgar explanation i would totally put a pillow case around his both of his entire legs and lay on his thighs to use them as pillows for the night. will the pillows be warm? yes. will i enjoy it thus one time? more than yes. imagine an even squishier pillow than the one u have rn OUUGHHHH i love his legs. i want him to do a wall sit/imaginary chair exercise and i will spot him by putting my entire weight on his voluptuous thighs .

also i like the smile/smug look he has on the last image it’s so cute

[magnoliasandbeardedtooth]

@heeheehoohoobeans

under a readmore cause this got long again haha whoops

disclaimer that this is not a STUDIED theory, just my feelings on the universe, and so its probably not going to encompass every detail. a lot of this game is intentionally very up to interpretation, and this is just mine

personally my feelings on how the head housemaiden describes the wish that keeps sending sif back arent as strong as what I mentioned in the first part of this post. the phrasing "broken, failing, rotting" is used in one of the comics that isat comes from, so it predates who knows how much of the game / story development. theres a chance the phrasing is very specific and intentional, theres also the chance the dev kept it because, frankly, its cool as fuck.

in accordance with this theory, though, heres what I think.

The head housemaiden clearly doesnt actually know whats happening. She doesnt notice anything wrong until the last second, and she has a completely inaccurate idea about why exactly time keeps resetting. None of her lines (that I remember) really serve to directly further the knowledge of the world and how it works. Rather, it seems like her main function is to serve as the skipping record that triggers sif's loop at the end, and to deliver lines that take on a loaded meaning with more context later.

Which is why I dont take her description of "broken, failing, rotting" toooooo literally? None of the other information she gives about the wish is very accurate, so why should that be the one thing thats correct?

What I think is happening with her is that she is very skilled at sensing craft, like how sif can sense a frozen person around the corner, or how Mira can sense everyone in vaugarde unfreezing. Theres the possibility that she can also sense some of the mechanics of the wish, or maybe even the ghosts sif leaves behind.

The wish that sends sif back in time is powered by his desire to stay with his family. The moment he talks to the head housemaiden is the moment that defines the end of their journey, and so is also the moment where he is most desperate to cling to that desire. I believe whats happening is that she can sense the craft that powers the wish begin to come together, can tell what kind of craft it is and what its going to do, draws the conclusion that its happening because the people of dormont did something to corrupt the wish (which we know is inaccurate), and in a panic, apologizes about it to sif. I think she can sense it the "first" time sif gets to her because his desire to stay with his family and the wish to make it happen are there already. He doesnt need to be insane or tortured for it to happen, this whole story takes place because it was already there to begin with.

And like a few of her other lines, the description of "rotting" comes to take on more meaning as sif deteriorates. Its not just a way to describe the fact that somethings wrong with the world anymore. As sif becomes more conflicted, it also describes his whole emotional state, and the inner conflict of wanting to give up on his wish vs his dependence on it to stay with his family.

So to answer "is the 'rotting' the wish or the universe," I think its neither. In my mind, literally, its a misconception the head housemaiden comes to, and figuratively, it's sif's emotional state, which directs the wish.

technically they are both part of the universe, but you know what I mean

edit I didnt remember while writing this whole thing that the line "broken failing rotting" is mentioned in euphrasie's breakdown, which, in the context of this theory, makes its use very intentional

in that case, I think the universe is talking about the wish. not really the mechanics of it, but its fuel, its control panel, sif's desire to be with his family, is broken, failing, rotting

I still believe when euphrasie says it, shes sensing something wrong in general and is trying her best to describe something she cant understand. when the universe says it, its talking about sif

thinking about the relationship between sif and the universe, and related theories / headcanons aka I listened to a song and I need to get these feefees out of me

this is a lot of prelude for something that can be shown with just the video clip, but I want to include all the strings that make up this knot

Its not explicitly stated, but I believe it's pretty clear that whenever sif repeats something three times while hoping for something (sharpening the keyknife, carving in general, praying to the change god statue in dormont), he is performing wish craft.

however, he doesnt repeat anything three times when getting the keyknife. he doesnt even need to pray to get it at all, the change god just gives it to him. they say themselves that they dont care for rituals. they never even take credit for the stat buff, they only take credit for the keyknife

when sif changes how they pray at the change god statue, their method more strongly resembles the ritual to make a wish at the favor tree (picking the one you like best), and as a result the buff gets better. it is the wish craft ritual that is the important part of the prayer to that statue, not the change god

one thing that IS explicitly stated is just how powerful wish craft is for those who know the rituals, and how dangerous it is in the wrong hands. between the disappearance of colors (Im pretty sure that was the result of a wish, I may be misremembering), the disappearance of the country, and the king being nearly successful in freezing all of vaugarde in time, it only takes one wish to take out massive chunks of the world at a time

we know that wish craft is very entwined in the culture of the country (the story written about in the journal is told as a cautionary fairy tale, the rituals themselves are so deeply ingrained in sif that the wish to forget the country did not restrict his memory of the rituals, and he can perform wish craft without even being fully aware he is doing it)

it seems reasonable to me that the reason for the country's disappearance was to hide the existence of wish craft and the rituals to access that power from the rest of the world. considering sif didnt even remember his culture AND had good intentions, and still nearly ended the world, seems like that concern is pretty well founded. however, thats not the important theory Im making this post about

the country has knowledge of wish craft in conjunction with worship of the universe. "the universe leads, we can only follow," "the universe willed it," seems pretty safe to say that sif's Universe is the "entity" that is granting wishes

the way wishes are described, they dont seem like something the universe grants based on who worships it. as long as you know the ritual, you get the wish. everyone is part of the universe, after all, worshiper or not

Admittedly, its a bit of a stretch to say that the universe as a collective force has any sense of empathy for human struggles. but using the change god as an example, as spiteful as they are to sif, and unsympathetic to anything other than a human's role in the concept of change, they still show a great deal of care and favor to mira, someone who loves them. it is possible for a deity to care for those that care about it

sif, despite no longer having access to his culture or why he cares about the universe, still loves the universe, very very deeply, just as much as mira loves change. the change god says that sif's deity will never answer him, but I dont think thats the case

and this is the important headcanon that I am making this post for

sif is performing the rituals, so he gets the wishes, simple as. but I feel strongly that his wishes getting granted in very small but noticeable ways, despite not knowing how or why hes doing it, is the presence of his universe helping him, caring for him, even when he doesnt remember it

the strongest evidence for this, and the basis for this whole thing, is exactly how euphrasie breaks down in act 5

at first I only really noticed when she laughs, it reminded me very much of how the change god, a being who uses sprites of other characters and has done a whole possession, laughed during their encounter. they and euphrasie are the only two that use anything other than "ha," and right after this laugh is when her breakdown pauses and she says the lines

"... Soon you'll be able to go back to your normal lives. Away from battle and strife. Finally, you'll all be able to go home!!!"

which, knowing the end of the game is coming, is incredibly relevant. very deliberate

before this pause, her breakdown seems pretty chaotic. the characters and the player are just coming out of one harrowing experience, and are clearly headed for another. the cohesiveness of this glitchy breakdown amongst a mess of the rest of the world doing the same isnt really high up on the list of priorities. none of the characters notice anything beyond the fact that reality is breaking, not even sif. it just sounds like scary nonsense.

but with the context of euphrasie being possessed to talk to sif, every single one of her lines makes perfect sense

(footage from Zhain Gaming on yt)

the universe is there its talking directly to him, it was there the whole time

the Universe loves Sif so much

[winderlylandchime]

3/3 and then Randy said him and gale talked about it a little while ago ‘oh? You talked about prom a LITTLE while ago? WHY CANT THESE CONVERSATIONS HAPPEN IN PLACES I CAN VIEW?! Wait the high schoolers were real AND homophobic? Man..fuck them kids. EVERYONE BASHED HIM IN THE FACE? I remember Michael doing it but everyone? They had my man do 70 takes just so the crew could get in a hit..nice’ ‘straight women were the ones who watched the show? Suddenly I dont feel so alone. (Ron mentions women/children thing) ah fuck, i dont have kids. I just stuck around for those two’ Here is where they mentioned a reboot and I have never seen this man get up so fucking fast ‘HUH? *he starts laughing like a madman and turns to me and goes* please rewind and watch Gale, he looks like he’d rather be dead. Look how he smiles at Peter. But he will have to suck it the fuck up because I HAVE PLANS FOR THEM! Oh Blondie also looks like he’d rather be dead. Once again I HAVE PLANS SO DEAL WITH IT.’ Ron makes the new cast joke ‘I DONT FUCKING THINK SO! See! Peter is there to humble them. No, no grandpa, i have plans! You shush!’ Ron talked about how its great if youre married or not and that doesnt make you less and he paused it and went ‘Then why in the fuck did you keep everyone in Brian and Justin’s business? Why the fuck did i have to watch that fucking proposal? I will fight you grandpa! I dont like them’ ‘i wonder how Gale’s parents felt about him being Brian..especially cause you know cult.. Is there any other Gale interview I can watch? I miss him already’ they are now talking about how they decided to end after S5 ‘SIX SEASONS?! So they couldve fixed that finale? But chose not to? Or end it at bike ride! That was good enough. Why did they decide to make me suffer’ peter than mentioned renegotiating contracts and he paused it and went ‘Ohhh now i wonder how they were paid. Do you think it was equal? Like how Friends did it where they all got together cause David suggested it? Or were Gale and Randy paid more cause theyre leads? Imagine what all sent on behind the scenes, im usually not nosy but thats because social media gives me access to everything’ and then the host said a lot of fans wanted the wedding and he paused it and yelled ‘WHO THE FUCK WANTED THAT?! People actually liked that? Like for real? Not in a sarcastic haha way? The fuck?’ He was so offended. And now they’re finishing the panel with Britin obviously seeing each other and the poem ‘sweetheart, there was no other option than for them to still see each other but Brian couldve gone with him because that was his dream too you old grandpa! *rons starts fangirling about Britin traveling* oh fuck, he is me. That is me. (Ron starts talking about only time and reads the poem) i liked that Only Time line. That was nice, it hurt like a motherfucker and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since but it was nice. Shakespeare? *ron finishes the poem and my brother nods his head, lifts his cast a little like his usual fist thing and whispers* Shakespeare.’ And then he went back to watch the poem again and he saw Gale hunched over watching ron and he goes ‘oh that man is obsessed with Shakespeare, huh? OR he too thinks the finale was shit..i prefer the second option’ And then the panel ended and he goes ‘so basically, Gale and Randy just came to this thing to show everyone that theyre still pretty and to sit there and laugh at Peter. I support that’

Afterwards as a little treat, I did show him the clip of Randy whispering ILY. And he fucking lost his mind. He watched it like 5 times and went ‘how did we get from THIS to shy as fuck?Who do I have to fight? Who hurt my boys? This shit was the most adorable shit I’ve ever seen! WHY ISNT THERE MORE INTERVIEWS WITH THEM?’ And after that he went through every recommended video on youtube. And that’s how he found out about the 2018 reunion…

The belief that it was straight women making up the audience pisses me off because so many queer women and AFAB folks love this show. MAYBE it’s because the straight women were the ones crossing boundaries at the cons asking inappropriate questions because queer women would NEVER (queer women don’t let me down, let’s maintain the 4th wall, mm’kay?)

END AT THE BIKE RIDE. Yes, I have always said this. Your brother and I are on the same wavelength!

The clip of Randy whispering ILY is everything.

I am loving this!! Sorry I’m not writing more, I’m doing this in the midst of absolute chaos lol. There’s a dog barking and a bunch of people having conversations.