#we don't even get a little glimpse into her intentions like we do with the touden parents so it's mostly up to our interpretation

[dunmeshistash]

Hope you don't mind if I answer your tags

#im not super qualified to talk about this bc im amerimutt through and through#but Milsiril is definitely in the position of a 'white' mother adopting a child from a conflict that she was pretty directly engaged in#(or was tangentially related to as a Canary veteran)#in the short about food from peoples childhoods kabru is about to bring up food from his youth in Utaya#but Misiril's glowing expecting face makes him back down#(obviously a little put upon)#and talk about elvish desserts she gave him#her lack of interest and care for his home culture#and a seeming lack of understanding for why *kabru* would care about it#idk we see her basically twice#once where she is a prototypical obstacle to Kabru growing up (which is normal for coming of age stories)#and one where she puts her own feelings ahead of her son's#bc her happiness is dependent on kabru's childhood being uncomplicatedly happy#otherwise shes failed#I do still bet theres some outsized hatred for her for sure#but the two times we see her it is *not* in a flattering light#im not an adopted immigrant but i am VERY familiar with the neurotic white mom with fragile emotions

I am not qualified either since I don't have much information about adoptive families let alone inter-racial adoptive families so as it relates to real life I have very little context

But I can talk about Dungeon Meshi, and yes both times we see Milsiril in the story aren't very flattering and honestly she's barely acknowledged for most of it, most info we have about Milsiril is in supplementary content but that's also what I find fascinating, since it seems that people made up their minds to hate her with just the couple of times we see her in the story

In the actual story my opinion of Milsiril was "she sure was there" and forgot about it, I went in more dept about her manga appearances in this old post

The info we get about Milsiril in Kabru's backstory story is "she is an overprotective mother, she cares for short lived children, she is a ruthless master and she has something wrong with her" (several scars in her arms and a personality that flips from crybaby to ruthless)

Then in Mithrun's backstory we see a completely different Milsiril that's gloomy and that almost mercy kills Mithrun before deciding to spare his life cause he "might be useful".

We only see her as she relates to these two character's past, one of them a highly edited version of her to fit the story Kabru wanted to tell and the other Kabru's recollection of when he finally decided he would stop something like Utaya from happening again which has her as an obstacle he had to overcome.

So I understand why she isn't a fan favorite from those small appearances, but I don't think there's much there to straight up hate her and assume she had a hand at a traumatizing childhood for Kabru (since his trauma stems from Utaya not elves, like Rin) but when you go to the extra information about Milsiril is when I think people's reactions get the most extreme

The extra you mentioned I think it's the worst Milsiril gets

in the short about food from peoples childhoods kabru is about to bring up food from his youth in Utaya#but Misiril's glowing expecting face makes him back down#(obviously a little put upon)#and talk about elvish desserts she gave him#her lack of interest and care for his home culture#and a seeming lack of understanding for why *kabru* would care about it

That was a real bad look Milsiril. I do think it's an exaggeration to infer "lack of interest and care for his home culture" just from this since she doesn't say anything and makes an even worse face when he complains about the taste, to me this is insensitivity due to ignorance not a lack of interest in her child.

All the other interactions we have of her, especially when it's not in a joke comic about sweets, she acts and is described as taking an interest in her children, including Kabru.

I'll only pull up this one comic cause I feel like I rant about Milsiril way too much but this is from the adventurer's bible, which I assume most people that want a better look into the characters have read.

She immediately takes an interest in his worries, he trusts her with an insecurity and she does her best in her way to help him in the way she knows how (which might not be appropriate since not everyone responds well to thick books and research work when they're insecure about something but Kabru is that type that loves it)

Anyway, then Kabru describes her as "She made every effort to answer her children's questions and satisfy their curiosity", to me this indicates interest in them, and at no point she stops Kabru from talking about his past to her as the sweets extra might make it seem like, in this conversation he's even referring to his bio mother as mom without any resistance or discomfort from Milsiril. But she is from a society that famously dismiss other cultures, especially short lived ones, and even tho she is an outcast it has affected how she interacts with the world, so yes no excuses for the fruitcake thing, white mom moment.

I don't really see this part in her tho

#and one where she puts her own feelings ahead of her son's#bc her happiness is dependent on kabru's childhood being uncomplicatedly happy#otherwise shes failed

She wants to protect Kabru because she also has trauma related to Utaya, she wanted him to be safe and happy because she's overprotective, and she teaches him how be a murder machine for the same reason. You talked about how she was involved in the incident but I don't think people realize how involved she was since that information isn't widespread

She dug this small child out of rubble in a tragedy she was supposed to prevent, a tragedy that left her so traumatized and disgusted with her own kind she ran away and secluded herself in the mountains

Most of my issues, and fascination, with Milsiril's perception in the fandom is that every extra info people seem to get about her is twisted into a context where it would be bad

>She cared for Mithrun? It's probably cause he was pathetic and she felt good to have power over him, or better yet, she wanted to use him to destroy the dungeon, you know cause she's a puppetmaster

>She is friends with Helki? Is probably because he's a prisoner and she keeps him around cause she's superior to him

>She adopts and cares for short lived children? She sees them as animals not humans, famous human trafficker Otta said so.

>She became closer with Helki because he was abandoned by his past comrades? Damn she's so disgusting she only likes people if they're inferior

(edit: just to be clear these are all paraphrasing actual things I've seen people say about her)

When there's no evidence that her motivation really is that. She's flawed but every dungeon meshi character is flawed, so it makes me sad that no matter what is said or revealed about her people seem to twist into something nefarious.

Like, don't get me wrong, I can see a way to explore the negative effects she might have had on Kabru, especially because Kabru is literally the last living person from Utaya and was raised by someone that is completely alien to it, but I think that making her into a fully evil and not redeemable character in the "there's nuance everywhere" story just makes it much less interesting.

I'm now feeling embarrassed for talking so long about Milsiril so I'll go hide again but if for some reason anyone wants to read me going on and on about her you can read this post about why I think Milsiril adopted Kabru and this post about why I think she helped out Mithrun

Am once again thinking about Milsiril and the general fandom impression of her, it's fascinating

[smutallyouwant]

Twice Fic World ch. 1

Night Club Darkness

Mina x Male Reader

Words count: 1.5k

Summary: You saw your sexy co-worker Mina at a nightclub, and she approached you with a smile. On the next day, she was late for work. What could've happened between you two on that night??

What a day from your office works, it's already 8pm in the evening and before you lay on your bed you heard a knock in your door.

" Y/N, it's me Jay"

" Coming"

You opened the door and your friends Jay, Ali, and Paul are here.

" Come on bro, put some clothes up and let's go have fun" said Ali.

This is a rare occasion that you and your friends had because you're all busy from work. Although you're tired, you can't pass on this opportunity so you quickly took a cold shower and dressed up nicely with a white slacks, white long sleeves polo, a black blazer, and your Heinrich Penny deep tan leather shoes. And of course, you also wore a nice perfume.

" My man looks like a gentleman aye?" said Paul.

" You're planning to get laid tonight? " asked Ali.

You chuckled. " No man, I just want to be presentable and smell nice"

" You don't need to lie to us, we know that you're longing for a girl" said Paul.

They all laughed and you all started to walk to the nearest night club.

After entering the club, your group sat in a cushioned sit and had a few shots. Your friends started to talk with girls and brought them to your table. You're not that fond with this type of parties so you started to question your decision of wearing this quite amusing clothes.

"Hey Y/N, we're going to dance a little bit" said Jay.

" Come and join us " said Ali.

" Yeah yeah, I'll come over " you said, knowing fully well that you have no intentions to.

After a few minutes you had a glimpse of a familiar body shape, coincidentally she turned around to you. It's Mina your sexy co-worker, you have a crush on her since she is nice but you don't think she got no boyfriend. She is approaching you with a smile, though you're not assuming that she's looking into you and you took a shot.

Then she reached your table and leaned into the cushioned seat.

" Hey Y/N, I didn't know that you club in this place"

"Holy crap she is indeed talking to you" you said inside your head.

You swallowed the shot and said

" Oh hey Mina, I didn't think that you club as well, although I don't club at all " you said in an underwhelming tone.

" Let me guess, a girl invited you over? "

" No, my friends invited me. We never had a chance to hang around since we're all busy so I didn't turn it down" you said while pointing to your dancing friends.

" Oh so they left you here while dancing with some girls " she said while pouting her mouth.

You're talking to your crush and she made a cute pouting, you can't stop your meat to grow.

" Come on let's dance too" she said before holding your wrist and leading you to the dance floor.

You two danced over a hype beats, and the music turned into a pop song with dirty lyrics on it. Mina started to wrap her arms on your neck pulling you closer to her face and you wraped your arms into her waist, pulling her closer to you as well. Your meat is growing larger and you can't hide the bulge it made to your pants.

" You smell great " Mina whispered to your ear.

Her breath made you shiver and made you horny as well, or is it because of alcohol?

" You smell great too" you whispered into her ear as well, and sniffed her left shoulder afterwards.

" It smells like strawberry" you said while looking into her eyes.

She can't hide the smile and she blushed all over her cheeks. You're also blushing but in a different section of your body.

" Do you like strawberries? " she asked while looking at you with a smile.

" Yes they're my favorite, on drinks, desserts, and even the strawberry itself" you answered.

" Do you want to come to my table so you can taste strawberry rather than smelling it?" she said while looking to you seductively.

You froze in a second and you thought of her offer. You crotch grown larger and you just smelled her shoulders again and gave it a little peck of your lips. After doing that you saw her bite her lips and started pulling you from your wrist to her table. It is the same cushioned seat with a table, the only difference is the lighting. It is incomparable darker.

She pushed you into the seat and crawled on top of you. After looking at her seductive face for a second, you started palming her face with your right arm and your left arm wraped her waist. She hugged your neck while her right arm is gently rubbing your hair while you're kissing her neck. You're hearing soft moan while you're discovering her neck using your tounge and lips. You pushed her gently and hold her neck with your right arm so you can kiss every part of her shoulders she hooked her left arm to your nape and her right arm is holding your legs for support.

While you're kissing her shoulders and back to her neck every sometime, she started grinding into your crotch and her moans intensified. You can't control yourself and started to kiss her lips and you both started to make out. With a gently passionate french kiss, you started to follow her rhythm and started grinding her as well while holding her waist to push her closer to your crotch. You both moaned inside your kisses. Your other arm found its way to her bountiful breast and started fondling it from above the clothes.

She broke the kiss and started kissing your neck. Your head leaned back and you hung there at the seat like a rotting vegetable. She started touching your bulge and she crawled under. You gave her a short sloppy kiss before she removed your belt and unbuttoned your pants. You leaned back and put both your arms into the rest of the cushion seat as Mina licks your shaft and started sucking your dick. You can't believe that she is now sucking your dick, you took a look and gently pats her head.

" Good girl, ahh~~ I love this Mina " you said in a moaning and rusty voice.

Mina started to suck it gently and slowly, you felt the tingle every time she licks the head inside her hot mouth. She can't do deep throat YET but she is a natural when it comes to massaging dick with her tounge inside her mouth. She stopped and quickly stood up.

" Stay there little Y/N, wait for me and you better keep stroking it so it remain that big " she said seductively.

Confused, you stroke your dick without hesitation. She quickly walked towards the comfort room, and you're assured that no one can see you pleasuring yourself while thinking about what happened and what can still happen.

After a minute she came back. She came back without her panties and her cycling while her shorts is still intact.

" What a naughty girl, thanks for that easy access " you said before pulling her for a kiss and forcing her to ride you.

You gave her no time to speak, she aligned her pussy into your shaft and she quickly grinds against your crotch. She can't hold her moans but no one will hear both of you due to the loud music. She leans back and you shoved both of her top's straps and revealed her tits. As you started sucking it, she leaned forward to you.

" Ahh~~ fuck Y/N, fuck me good, keep sucking it baby. I love it " she said under her moans.

" aah~~ " " fuck " " yes babyy~~~ "

You heard those words repeatedly under her breath. It turns out that she likes being fucked while her tits are being sucked. You keep that pace.

" Ahhhhhh~~~ Y/N, ahh~~ fuck~~ I'm cumming " she said almost yelling her brains out.

After she came, she laid onto you like a vegetable. But you're not done yet. You positioned her against the seat and started ramming her from behind.

" Ahhh~ Y/N , I just came " she said while moaning in a underwhelming tone.

" Someone might see us coming, ahh~~ yes baby~~ " she said looking at you from behind with a seductive smile. It came to you that she doesn't care if someone saw both of you fucking each other. Frankly, so are you.

" I can do this all night " you said while still ramming her.

As you pump her plump ass, you felt her pussy tightening.

" ahhh~ I'm cumming again Y/N please don't stop "

" Keep fucking me baby "

She said while looking at you seductively.

" I'm cumming too, can I cum inside? " you asked jokingly with a smile.

" Just cum into my face baby, I like it that way " she came back to you with a seductive glare and a smile.

You kept ramming her and she came, afterwards you felt yours is coming too. You pushed her and pulled her neck so you can shoot your load into her face. She hold both of your legs and you came into her face while she opened her mouth and reveals her tounge. You came all over her face and inside her mouth, some reached her tits and clothes.

She collected your cum with her fingers and eats it. You really appreciates her by doing so, so you gave her a proper kiss.

After you two have groomed inside the comfort room, you introduces her to your friends.

You two danced a little again before you invited her to come over your place. You fucked each other again before taking a rest, and fucked her again before eating breakfast and while taking a shower. You drove her home and you went straight to your office for work again.

" Mina is late today, she have never gone late since she worked here " your co-worker said.

" I wonder why she's late " you said under your smile.

------------------THE END----------------

Thank you for reading my first ever smut. Please let me know if you want more of Mina or if you want to have different Twice member for a smut.

[jarofstyles]

harry damn near begging for yn and being needy, mouthing at her neck chest and stomach while she’s trying to read plsss

PLEASE I LOVE THIS SHIT!

Patreon.

-----

Harry was a horny little menace. But god, was he a convincing one.

It had started when he crawled into her cozy little nest in their bed, cooing about how pretty she looked. In her glasses and her hair thrown up in a bun, along with a few pimple patches, she was sure she wasn't at her prime but it always did give her butterflies when he complimented her in her most relaxed, vulnerable state.

When he asked what she was read, she explained the general synopsis of what had happened so far- a royal romance, enemies to lovers-, and he had snuggled closer. Freshly showered, he was shirtless in just in a pair of grey sweats, skin and hair still slightly damp as he rested his head on her shoulder to catch a glimpse of the pages. But his intentions weren't pure.

"Oh? This is one of those dirty books, isn't it?" He cooed. Of course, as fate would have it, he had turned up during one of the smut scenes in the book. He knew she read filth, had an entire collection of smut ridden books, but this time in particular he felt rather smug about catching her.

"They're all dirty books." She drawled, turning the book so he could see better. He had a one track mind though, and turned his face to bury in her neck with a deep exhale. If he was being honest, he had been aching all day. Y/N had teased him slightly over text and he knew coming home that she would be in his shirt, looking so soft and familiar, he simply wanted to bury himself in her and never leave. Getting to see her so warm and relaxed, it did things to him.

"I have a better idea." He murmured into her skin, kissing the smoothness of her neck. "Why don't we have our own fun, hm? Been gone all day, wanting to come home... and you're reading' about other people having sex." He grunted, slipping his hand under her shirt, nosing at her like a needy pup.

"Well, yes." Y/N laughed through her nose. "I do tend to do that. I enjoy reading some tasteful sex scenes. Beautifully written ones. Is that so wrong?"

"Never said it was wrong, sweetness. Just said the obvious. M'home now, you don't need to read about it." His hand found her breast as his kisses moved up towards her jaw, sloppy with his movements and smearing the wet kisses over the curve of it. "You can experience anything y'want with me. M'ready to role-play, even. Just let me into that pretty pussy, and I'll make all those dreams come true, off the paper."

Of course Y/N knew she was fighting a losing battle- one she very clearly wanted to lose, based off of the sudden awareness of him in between her thighs and his fingers gently plucking her nipple. He liked to beg for it a little bit, though, so she sighed. "I dunno, H. This scene is really good. Maybe you'll just have to wait." The tone of her voice sounded serious but they both knew the game. This was part of it.

"Please, baby?" He whined. "Just a taste of it? Or... can let me warm myself inside of you." His teeth nibbled under her ear, a sweet spot he knew would cause damage to her resolve, sucking on the skin. Y/N felt it between her thighs. That familiar pulsing, her clit beginning to swell, her hole beginning to leak. Harry had quite the effect on her every single time, but hearing him beg always did it to her.

"Please, jus' let me make us feel good. Know you love t'be nice and full, can have it stuffed in you in just a few minutes... get you to feel it in your tummy, baby." He pleaded. "Cmon. Can make it so good for you. Missed feeling you wrapped around me all day, didn't get enough of you this morning." A horny thing he really was. "Can't help that you feel so good that I need you all the time, but m'dying for it. Been thinking about it all day long, just let me slide in." He continued with the begging, slipping his hand back down to the band of her panties.

When Y/N didn't tell him off, he slipped his digits between her thighs and let out a strangled moan. "Fuck me, baby. You're dripping." He whimpered. "Please, let me have it. Let me feel you around my cock, babylove. It aches, you're the only way to fix it." He was getting desperate, rubbing against her thigh as his fingers slid up and down her wet slit. "M'begging you, my love. Let me in."

"Okay, baby. Okay." Y/N laughed at his desperation. "You can slip inside, but you can't move until I finish this chapter." Harry didn't need further instruction, slipping his pants off and tugging her panties to the side with impatience. It took him but a few seconds to do it, spreading her legs open as he turned her on her side so he was spooning her from behind and letting himself in. Slowly pressing the ruddy, leaking tip of his cock through the soaked folds of her puffy cunt and finding her hole, notching against it before pressing inside.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." His whimper was vibrated against her ear, making her clench slightly around him. He was truly desperate for it, letting her stretch as he sunk in inch by inch and rested his head against her cheek, hand going back up her shirt. "I'll be good. Promise."

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Emily's shoulder Charlie: "There is still good in Sera. Her intentions have been horridly corrupted, but they once came from a desire to protect and preserve. We can help her see the truth and return to goodness!"

Emily's shoulder Vaggie: "PUNCH HER IN HER STUCK-UP ANGEL FACE!"

XD chaggie down in hell having a rest after the drama, meanwhile EMILY-

Emily: "I'm not sure the face punching idea would even work. Sera's too tall..."

Shoulder Vaggie: "Trust me, she's sunk low enough for you to reach."

Shoulder Charlie: "Which MEANS she's ALSO in the perfect position for HUGS!!!"

Emily: "I don't even know how to throw a punch."

Shoulder Charlie: "And that's fine!!"

Shoulder Vaggie: "No problem. Just think about that that time you found out souls were being permanently wiped from existence once a year in the name of protecting heaven bc Sera was scared people might not actually like being damned and tortured for all eternity and figured just letting Adam murder them was the best way to keep sinners away from the pearly gates. Not that you needed to know any of that, though. It was fine if you sat happily up on your cloud, far above the mountain of dead bodies piled up to keep it safe."

Shoulder Charlie: "....We could punch her a little, maybe."

Emily: "Charlie!"

Shoulder Charlie: "I'm sorry! You think Vaggie's making a REALY good point, is the thing!"

Emily: "Why do my hands suddenly hurt-?"

Shoulder Vaggie: "It's called clenching your fists. You're making a fist with your hands for the first time ever. Good job. Don't tuck your thumb though."

Emily: (untucks thumb) "I still can't just punch Sera. It wouldn't make anything better!"

Shoulder Charlie: "We could call it a, uh, direct demonstration of our opinions on the matter. Or a lived example of why violence is bad!"

Emily: "You're not supposed to be arguing for punching!"

Shoulder Charlie: "I said I'm sorry! But the only time you met me, the real me, I spent the end of the day burning with rage and yelling at people about it! And it's my girlfriend you've got advocating for the face punching- I can't help that you think I'd be kinda down for it!!"

Shoulder Vaggie: "The whole dating me thing is a pretty big clue she's at least not turn off by violence, if it's for helping people instead of, y'know. Murder."

Emily: "Vaggie- help me. The real you was more quiet and cautious-"

Shoulder Vaggie: "Probably because of the blackmail."

Emily: "-you, you tried telling Charlie to keep a cool head! Tell me that too!"

Shoulder Vaggie: "Remember that thing where it turns out real me used to be an exorcist, used to do that murder stuff? And got left behind in hell? Probably for the whole not liking the murder thing?"

Emily: "I was trying not to remember that..."

Shoulder Vaggie: "You're not a princess of hell or a lowly ex-exorcist. You're a seraphim. You could punch Sera and get away with it."

Emily: "Ugh.."

Shoulder Charlie: "But only a LITTLE punch, okay? Gently. Gently punch."

Shoulder Vaggie: "That's not how it works babe but sweeet thought."

Emily: (SIGHS) (stops arguing internally with herself)

Sera: "....."

Sera: "Are you alright, Emily."

Emily: (despondent) "I'm fine, Sera."

Sera: "You seem a bit, droopy. I haven't even had proper glimpse of your face all day."

Emily: "Sorry. I just can't look at you right now."

Sera: (devastated) "...oh."

Sera: (rallying) "Well it will pass in time, I'm sure. Once you understand things better."

Emily: (hiding fists in skirts) (urge to punch) (RISING) "SuRE."

Emily: "..."

Emily: "Oh you know what? We haven't talked about Sir Pentious today!"

Sera: "Haven't we."

Emily: "We haven't, actually!" (smugly smooths out skirts) "He's settling in here nicely, isn't he? Isn't it wonderful having a new angel in heaven? Seeing him around, so amazed at everything- being so sweet and kind as he finds his way around after dying to protect his friends- Isn't it such an extra blessing, that he made it here aaaaallllll the way from hell? Aren't we lucky Charlie and Vaggie's hotel for reforming sinners is a thing? And is STILL a thing, even after Adam and Lute tried killing them all? On our orders? Which- thank heaven!- didn't work?"

Sera: (eye twitch) (eye twitch) "Indeed."

Emily: "I'm sure they'd be SO happy to see how well Sir Pentious is doing." (beaming) "We should invite them back sometime!"

Sera: (Glowering) "....."

Emily: "See I knew you'd agree Sera. You're overprotective- but that doesn't make you vindictive and petty, right? Right. You're not like Adam, may he rest in peace- Now, about setting something up to help the transition go more smoothly, the next time a sinner earns their place in heaven..."

-down in hell-

Vaggie: "You've got a great frown line going on, sweetie. What's up?"

Charlie: "Oh it's silly, but...

Charlie: "...Is Emily going to be okay up in heaven, do you think? After finding out about. Y'know."

Vaggie: "If she's anything like you? No."

Charlie: (whimpers) (frown x2)

Vaggie: "But if she's half as brilliant as you are, then she'll figure something out."

Charlie: "If she's so much like me, then she's also a Charlie without her Vaggie. That's not much of a Charlie."

Vaggie: "You did fine in Cannibal Town alone, babe."

Charlie: "Only AFTER thinking about you!"

Vaggie: "Well- uhh-" (tries not to smile) (smiles a lot) "Sir Pentious is up there? He counts for something."

Charlie & Vaggie: (stare up at heaven)

Charlie: "....think he's already blown up the pearly gates?"

Vaggie: "If his Egg Boiz haven't shown up there yet? Yeah. Probably."

-pearly gates-

Sir Pentious: (clinging to the wreckage of the gates) "THEY ARE VERY SSSSIMPLE BOIZ! THEY MIGHT NOT REMMBER HOW TO KNOCK OR CONSSTRUCT AND EXSSSSPLOSSIVE POWERFUL ENOUGH TO GET THEM PASSSSSST IT!"

Sera: "That is why we have Peter keeping WATCH on the gates! We do NOT detonate the gates of heaven with several tons of TNT- singeing Peter's wings in process!"

St. Peter: (coughs smoke) "Ow~"

Sir Pentious: "BUT THEY ARE SSSSSMALL! WHAT IF THEY GET OVERLOOKED? MY BOIZSS!!"

Emily: "We could just leave the gates open-"

Sera: "NO!"

Emily: (leaning in to pentious) (whispering) "I'll leave the gates open an Egg Boi sized gap okay? Don't worry."

[jasmineoolongtea]

Hi!!! How are you? I really like your blog and I saw you're taking requests rn? I have a little request, with either Gojo, Yuuta or Megumi, whoever you'd like to write it for/whoever fits better.

Basically, I just had a really big exam recently and the results came out and I didn't make it. It's hurt me a lot but I'm trying to be okay, I hadn't got a lot of time to study for it honestly, so I was like 50/50 confident but it still hurts seeing my efforts go to waste. And my parents are trying to be understanding, they really are, but it's not the kind of understanding I need right now. They're like, "Oh darling it's okay, you did your best even though we were confident you'd crack it easily," when all I need is to be held and told it's fine and that I'm worth more than just an exam. So I was thinking something where the reader gets off a call with her parents and is crying quietly in the bedroom because their attempts to make her feel better only made her feel worse and then the character (whoever you choose!) notices and it's just cute cuddles and reassurances?

a/n: hiii, i'm doing alright!! i'm so sorry to hear that and i've gone through the same things before. it does suck when that happens and it's gonna suck for a while but remember at the end of the day, it's just one exam and this one exam won't determine everything, plus i'm sure you'll bounce back even stronger in the future!! instead of just doing one i'll do all three of them and i hope that you feel better soon anon + sending a virtual hug your way ε(´｡•᎑•`)っ 💕

gojo satoru knows eavesdropping is bad, more so when it's deliberate. but in his defence, he only had good intentions when he approached your room with a mountain of treats and gifts practically ready to burst out of his arms the minute he saw your face.

well, at least that was the initial plan. that is, until he heard an unfamiliar and frankly terrifying sound originating from behind your door.

maybe he should have had more tact when opening your door, possibly even knocking beforehand as a way of announcing his presence to you, but in that moment, thoughts like those were the least of satoru's worries when he met your tear-streaked face peering up at him from your curled up position on your bed.

a loud thud echoes within the walls of your room, various objects suddenly falling from his grip as he makes his way towards you. you don't look at him though, curling further inwards into yourself as if in an attempt to hide your swollen eyes and flushed face away from him. you can't hear it, but satoru's heart cracks slightly at the mere sight of you like this.

"hey, sweets." his voice is soft, possibly the softest you've ever heard him speak. you're still turned away from his, your sobs dying down as you attempt to trap them in your throat. the bed frame creaks slightly with the new addition of his weight.

it doesn't take a genius to tell that you're clearly not in the mood for talking or jokes or any of the typical antics that he would pull out of his arsenal to see that smile of yours that he loves so much. it also doesn't take a genius to see that things like your phone aren't doing much to alleviate your pain since you keep glancing anxiously at it every 2 or more seconds.

he takes it upon himself to flip your phone screen upside down and place it inside your bedside cabinet, out of sight, and this earns him a shaky sigh of relief from you. the grip you have on your knees relaxes ever so slightly more but he knows that this isn't going to solve everything.

you don't react any further, it's as if you're frozen in your position, lost in whatever dark recesses of your mind you're trapped in. featherlike touches dance across your skin before being replaced by a much more solid, palpable feeling of his arms wrapping around your figure and suddenly there's a glimpse of light peaking through all of the gloominess.

the moment you register that it's satoru that's pulling you into him, you can't help but just let yourself go and sink into his steady grip as you bury your face into the expanses of his chest. finally just succumbing to the sheer exhaustion of just trying to hold everything in, you start sobbing unabashedly, letting all of the emotion pour out of you with satoru being more than ready to be the one to soak it up all for you.

a gentle hand caresses your back with drawn-out strokes as you allow yourself to be comforted by the steady beat of his heart, a reminder of his presence right next to you. "it'll be alright." he murmurs quietly, his words of comfort only audible to you, the only audience he cares about right now. you feel a soft kiss being placed on your forehead as his lips linger there for a moment longer.

satoru might not know why you're feeling so down but at least he knows that he can be the person to make whatever burden you're dealing with just a little bit lighter and sometimes, that's enough for the both of you.

there's a lot that fushiguro megumi is known for being good at such as studying, handling pets and wild animals, being quiet and brooding (according to everyone else except himself).

there's also a handful of things that megumi is known for being bad at such as conversations, getting his hair to stay down and comforting people in most scenarios.

maybe it's just him but he always finds himself tongue-tied at the worst times and is secretly so busy with being worried over the idea of him putting his foot in his mouth and saying the wrong thing that might make things worse to the point where he just chooses to say nothing, not realising that this also doesn't help the situation.

so when he stumbles into your room, after hearing the tail end of your conversation with your parents over your phone that only resulted in you breaking out into tears and is now faced with a deeply upset you, safe to say that he's very unsure on what he should do.

carefully, he makes his way into the room and sits on the opposite end of the bed from you. as he gets closer towards you, you feebly attempt to wipe off the tears streaming down your face in an attempt to downplay how you're feeling, lest you worry him.

that should be the least of your worries, he thinks silently to himself.

the room is largely silent, both of you avoiding looking directly at the other, that is until megumi suddenly speaks up. "...do you wanna talk?" he asks, his voice slightly hesitant. the same old fears of potentially saying the wrong things, especially in such a delicate situation like this, are swirling around in his mind again and he can't help but listen to them.

you shake your head, glumly. he so wishes that he could take away your pain and sadness in an instant, even if he were the one to bear it instead if it meant that you would stop hurting, but unfortunately, the world doesn't work like that.

"okay." he pauses for a moment, as if pondering on what next he should say or do, in this case. he reaches out his hand and gently grasps your wrist, pulling you towards him and into his chest. like waves caught up in a current, you let yourself sink into his grip and fall into his comforting embrace.

for some reason, when all you can feel is the warmth of his body radiating off of him and onto you with the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest against your cheek, you can feel most of the sadness that previously flooded all of your senses start to melt away, like ice thawing when the sun comes out. you wrap your arms around him and in return, he rubs tender circles upon your back.

you whisper a "thank you" under your breath and he nuzzles his face against the crook of your neck.

megumi may be bad at talking or using his words to express what he's feeling or even to communicate with others, however, when it comes down to it, it seems that he doesn't need to rely on words to be there for the ones who truly matter to him.

some people might think that okkotsu yuuta is being dramatic when he says that one of his worst fears is seeing you sad but to him, this fear and worry of his is very much a real one and it breaks his heart when he notices your once joyful expression has now morphed into something much more melancholic.

he's on his way to your room after seeing how downcast your mood was today, compared to your typically more cheery demeanour when he suddenly stops in his tracks after he picks up on another female voice coming from your room.

your mum's voice rings out from over the crackly speaker of your phone. "oh sweetie, i'm sure that was just a silly mistake and it'll-"

you cut her off bluntly, "i'm sorry, mum. i just think i need some alone time right now." and with that, you quickly hang up your phone in dejection, throwing it slightly off to the side as a deep sigh escapes your lips.

yuuta clears his throat awkwardly from his place in the doorway and you're suddenly now aware of his newfound presence in your bedroom. his tone is clearly apologetic as he speaks, "i'm sorry. i didn't mean to overhear your conversation, i was just on my way to check up on you after noticing how down you were today."

"i-it's fine, yuu." you reassure him, well as best as you can in your current state as you hastily try to hide any traces of your crying from him. "i'm just not really in much of the mood to talk right now." you don't dare to say more, afraid of the sobs that you've been choking down up to this point might break out.

he nods solemnly to himself.

"then do you mind if i come in?" he asks tentatively and you shakily nod back in response. he walks into your room and takes a seat next to you on the bed, though leaving a slight space in between you two as if he knows that sudden proximity to someone else, especially when you're in a state like this, might just be too much for you.

he raises his hand, stopping at a short distance away from your face and tilts his head at you, as if asking for permission. slightly confused you nod, thinking that he's going to cup your cheek or something, but instead, he brings his finger to your cheek and starts wiping away the tear streaks running down your face. his touch is so gentle, and the care and love he has for you is so evident through how delicately he's taking the time to caress your face as well at the same time.

you can't help but feel your lip wobble slightly with how tender he's being with you. the corner of your eyes start to burn a little bit as you attempt to hold your tears back though you feel your resolve wavering ever so slightly with each brush of his fingertips.

yuuta slowly moves his other arms around you and pulls you towards him into his embrace. you take that as him allowing you to latch on to him and so you do as you burrow your face into his shoulder, sinking into the comfort of his touch. he hums softly under his breath as he whispers words of gentle reassurance. it feels like a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders as quiet sobs escape from you.

he pays them no mind though, only seeking to soothe you with his touch and reassuring affirmations. you squeeze his hand twice as a silent 'thank you' and he presses a fleeting kiss against yours in return.

to yuuta, this is nothing worthy of a thanks from you as this is merely a drop in the ocean if it means that your heart is just a little less heavy.

[herefortheships]

Assuming there's a third Beetlejuice movie, what do you think about the possibility that Lydia might learn more about B's and Delores backstory and, bc said story involved a ritual that demanded marriage (and possibly sex?) followed by murdering the spouse to gain immortality, it might make her even more wary of Betelgeuse's motivations wrt herself and marriage to her than usual?

Cause like, personally, I found him a little too nice and helpful in the last movie. Would be nice if his moralitity and motivations were a little more ambiguous in the next one, though I'd have ofc absolutely no problem if in the end it turned out he was just in love. I just think it would be interesting if there were extra stumbling blocks wrt him convincing her he's in love.

It would be interesting if they start the movie showing us more ambiguous motivations from Betelgeuse, and then as the story progresses it turns out we (and Lydia) were misjudging him and his actions. Depending on how they do it, it might be a little over-played, though, considering that's sort of what happened in the sequel.

We have several instances in which Lydia sees glimpses of Betelgeuse at the start of the film and she's terrified that he might be haunting her because she's seeing him again. Meanwhile Betelgeuse is out there giggling and kicking his ghostly feet because "Lydia might have actually seen him this time"! I thought that was cute and funny, and also part of the joke in the film, that while Lydia is scared being "haunted" by Betelgeuse, all he's doing is trying his best to contact her. His intentions were not evil, though Lydia thought they were.

So there was already a misunderstanding there: Lydia thinks he's haunting her for the sake of tormenting her, while in reality, he's simply trying to get her to see him.

There's also his marriage deal to escape Delores this time. We the audience know it's an excuse to marry her because he's head over heels for her (we've already seen how he was trying to get her to see him for over 30 years through his conversation with Bob which happened before Delores was mentioned to him, so Delores has nothing to do with him trying to be with Lydia), but Lydia doesn't know that.

Now, at the end of the film, however, she's seen how Betelgeuse did have feelings for her, after all, and was helpful to her and did nothing to harm her. All the contrary, he did even more for her than he had to, and even got himself in trouble, nulling the marriage contract that was supposed to be his condition to help. It says so clearly in the page about Code 699, by the way, that bringing a living person to the afterlife will result in any marriage the Deceased has to that person being nulled and voided, so no doubt Betelgeuse knew getting Lydia into the afterlife world result in that (plus the extra trouble he got into), but he did it anyway because his actions are all for her.

Lydia should know this by the third film after the events in the sequel (if we are so lucky to get it), so I don't think that her finding out about Betelgeuse's past lover and what they did in their brief relationship while alive will deter her from being with him if she does end up falling in love with him. If anything, she will understand him better; she will know he was played and murdered. It was Delores who wanted to perform the ritual, in the first place, and he only had the satanic ritual to fulfill her wishes (more evidence that this man has always been a romantic who will put his girl's needs before his own; the man drank fresh blood for his girl and had a satanic wedding and everything lol).

I don't think Lydia will suspect he will be seeking to perform a similar ritual. He's already attempted to perform a ritual by marrying her, before, so, if anything, her wariness to be with him will be around that experience. It will be about the question "Does he truly love me or does he just 'want out' and is playing me?" Let's not forget Lydia is fresh out of at least one failed marriage that we know of (Richard) and a toxic relationship (Rory), so she will naturally be wary of getting into a new relationship now. Getting into a relationship with Betelgeuse also has the added spice of him being long dead and a prankster, potentially murderous ghost/demon.

It doesn't matter how nicely Betelgeuse plays or how many heroic actions he performs in the film, the default around him, at least for the characters inside the movie, will be to see him as a potential threat and a volatile character. As the audience we know he's probably changed and has good intentions, but the characters in the story don't know what to expect from him. Lydia at least now can have an assurance that he isn't as scary as she thought and will not harm her or her daughter.

She knows he does some scary tricks but in the end they are just scary, but harmless, illusions. At least to her. He has harmed others, but Lydia has been safe with him. The Babyjuice was an illusion, for example, and he never truly sewed her lips together. She was obviously not truly pregnant and didn't give birth to Babyjuice either. Those were just scary, yet harmless pranks. The nightmare Babyjuice coming from Astrid is also a scary and messed-up, but harmless, prank; even Betelgeuse himself thought that one was weird. lol

I think Betelgeuse struggles to show his affection in a non-scary to a living human kind of way. So it would be interesting and also funny if they show him trying to prove himself to her and completely failing to see that he's totally scaring her instead. This is where Astrid could come in and help him if they go this route in movie three (I keep saying this, but they have so much material to pick and choose from for a potential third movie, it's crazy).

Astrid doesn't truly yet know Betelgeuse. Just that her mom told her "don't' ever say that name". Outside of what Lydia warned her about "bad things happening", what Astrid knows about Betelgeuse is that he helped save her life. I'm just saying, if the writers wanted they could bring in that dynamic in movie three (not me lowkey wishing for a sort of "parent trap" kinda situation with Astrid helping out Betel win her momma's heart 💀. As if that would ever happen, but a girl can dream).

Anyway, to end my ramblings. I have a hope they could start the third movie with a time jump. Moving forward months or maybe a year or two. If they start with a time skip then we can start the movie with an already established Betelgeuse x Lydia dynamic. They could get along, though Lydia might be cranky about the whole thing (until she comes to terms with her feelings for him lol). There's so much material there for a fun movie. The second movie already ended with showing us Betelgeuse is still hanging around Lydia, so it would be easy to start from there.

Tl;dr: I don't think learning about Delores and Betelgeuse's past will get in the way of Lydia. She already has her reservations about Betelgeuse, but at least now she knows he also made mistakes in his love life, and in his case it literally got him killed. Betelgeuse will still have to prove that he isn't out to get Lydia for something nefarious, because as good as he behaves he will still be perceived by many as a villain (even by the audience!). At least now he has both Lydia and Astrid, and even Delia, as witnesses that he can be helpful and even caring (they all witnessed him expose Rory, for example, and they all benefitted from his powers and trusted him when they needed help the most). He just has to do something selfless, with no marriage strings attached, to finally prove that his fondness for Lydia and her family is genuine.

(By the way, sorry for taking a while to answer! I still have backlogged questions I'm going through, and I like to give thoughtful answers, so it takes me a little while sometimes to answer. Thank you so much for asking me! I appreciate sharing my headcanons and thoughts with you. 💚💜)

[bl00dlight]

Question for the Culture...

Some thoughts on s2, Aemond needing mothers milk, alicole pussy rubbing, the Greens writing & characterisation.

After some consideration, I think the reason way the brothel scene is so jarring is because we've spent so little time with Aemond as a character, and S1 purposefully set up this very real mystique around him - espeically regarding duty, having disdain for Aegon's depravity (and literally being above it himself?) Etc, that we didn't get to see the process of what actually led Aemond there as a character. I actually do think it's because we are getting so few episodes that they are bypassing the very needed character progression that Aemond 10000% needs. It feels out of character because the show has set up a character which was exceedingly adverse to that behaviour. And you can feel the shift in his character, this season. To me he feels completely different, which shouldn't be the case just yet since like... Luke supposedly died only two weeks prior to the start of the season. We didn't get to see his progression into going from Alicent's #1 ride or die, to being her biggest hater? Nor did we see his progression into why he was even at the brothel? The leaks spoke about Aegon taking him to Cock Inn during B&C and well, we know that was the case because the Madam mentioned that. But? Why would they not show us that? Why would they not show us Aemond's progression into making that decision in the first place and the after effects leading him to returning back there? I think the scene was within his characterisation but like... not out of the blue. It felt like something we needed to see unfold. Because also, now all of his mystique is shattered. Like those are such STRONG choices to make him a milk drinking, fetal position, mummy's milkers ass bitch straight off the bat. Like??? Considering that two weeks ago he was like "Bro I am so much better than Aegon. I don't do that depravity shit. I'm dutiful, I should be King cause my brother is fucken gross and weak." Well? Okay... now Aemond is objectively grosser and weaker. Which was likely always the case, but it's something that should have been developed and revealed with time? They inadvertently destroyed the idea of his "mask" and his character being a massive antagonistic force that parallels Daemon. Because we've spent 10x more screen time with Daemon and we know underneath he is also fragile and vulnerable. We know that his dependence on Rhaneyra is significantly more complicated than it being about ambition. But it's not shown yet, he still actively is maintaining this incredibly antagonistic mask that makes him more elusive to the audience. We don't truly know his true intentions, his true vulnerabilities yet. So his actions come across as significantly more threatening, for all we know he could truly just be that malevolent while at the same time - we have seen glimpses which prove otherwise, that he is vulnerable and does desire love, comfort etc. But we don't quite know what that vulnerability truly is yet.

But with Aemond it's fucking beyond on the nose having him laying in an older woman's lap, drinking MILK and having his head patted while being cooed upon. Like okay so now we know exactly what the fuck is wrong with him. And he loses all complexity (currently) because we've not been shown the progression of this drastically opposing character choice. We've gone from a dude who was licking his lips at the sight of Daemon slicing and dicing Vaemond, who was posting up to his kid nephews and literally denouncing Aegon for his sexual depravity - to homeboy needing mummy's milk straight off the back, no inner conflict shown. It would've been nice to SEE him actually struggle with this level of vulnerability. It would've been nice to see his character unravel to the point where that scene didn't feel like I've just skipped several episodes of characterisation. And yall can say what you want, but I am right on this. It would've been far more compelling for them to keep his mystique for longer, to keep that vulnerability of his hidden and watch him struggle with it. Because now I know exactly what the fuck he is thinking, exactly what is wrong with him. There is no ambiguity left in his motivations nor whether or not his whole black leather edgy boy thing is a mask. Because now we know it's a mask, so all of his choices don't feel as.... threatening? They feel more like an angry teenage boy who needs a hug. Which is totally fine, but it's more intriguing if it weren't so explicitly shown to us that's what he is. I'd rather that be woven into his character and his of mask edgelord666 not be so suddenly stripped from him? Because now I know he isn't a raging psychopath, now I he isn't driven by his chaos. With Daemon, he still gives the impression he genuinely might be unredeemable. And that should be the case with Aemond.

And while we are here, I fucken hated the line of the brothel Madame reminding him of the smallfolk.

1) What authority does she hold over him to essential give him council or reprimand him on his behaviour. Why does she have the confidence to council him in the first place given she is in a position of vulnerability. That's the paradox, he could absolutely have her killed or hurt her and face zero consequences. So what gives her the security in knowing he wouldn't respond negatively to being counciled on the political repercussions of his behaviour? Why have they not SHOWED US their dynamic? Because I'm going into this knowing Aemond is about to commit mass genocide against the smallfolk? So unless that comment was just a throwaway liner to set that up, why would she feel compelled to be direct in that way? Why would Aemond a man who actively does not give a SHITTTTT about the lives of those below him, let a brothel Madame get away with saying that? And since he did let it slide, WHY???? Show us WHYYYY he would accept that advice?

2) If that line was used as a recalling to Aemond potentially feeling regret for the choices he is about to make, then just cut the cameras. Cause I think that would be an absolute waste of his characterisation. Everyone already feels bad about the smallfolk. They are really hammering it home. Even Otto gives a shit about them. The last person I want to see care is Aemond. Because it just doesn't make sense, why the fuck would he care? He has no reason to care given the role he plays in the war.

I want to use Cersei Lannister as a point that you don't need to implement a sense of societal empathy for your antagonist to have softness within them. Cersei is like number 1 bad bitch, doesn't give a fuck, is a number 1 hater and will straight up blow a bitch UP. But we see glimmers of softness with her children, with Jamie and even Margaery. And I think that just makes her so much more intriguing because we know something else resides within her other than malevolence but we the audience have to watch her go through the motions of it.

So far I've seen Aemond go through ZERO motions and I've seen the writers play their cards already. I hope I'm wrong. But we have 6 episodes left of s2. And so far, I've learnt so little about him as a character, while also knowing exactly what his core wound is.

I'm a tad worried for s2, and I'm a tad worried that the short season lengths are forcing the writers to speed up the way they allowed these characters to develop. There have been some incredibly strong ass moments, like Otto being THAT bitch and telling Aegon what's good. That was unbelievably incredible. Literally the entire scene between Daemon and Rhaneyra. IMPECCABLE character work, IMPECCABLE acting 10/10. Oh and everything Helaena at the moment is also beyond perfect. That funeral scene was harrowing.

But the downsides have been huge. To me, Aemond is drifting into a territory which is making me kinda not enjoy his character so much. Cause now I know what's good, he doesn't compell me right now. Knowing what lies beneath the surface isn't always a good thing, espeically given he has had like maybe 40 minutes of screen time overall in the series. And Alicole suffers the same fate. It was implied in season 1, 100000%, but uhhhhh its jarring because we never got to see HOW it unfolded. The process that lead alicent and criston into this very complex reltionship. It feels like they've been fucking for years, yet it's been like two weeks on canonically? Oh and having the green siblings not interact after B&C is diabolical. That is fucking lazy writing. Sorry. Because they haven't mentioned the fact Helaena has had neither Aegon nor Aemond acknowledge her. Which again, feels so fucking out of blue? It doesn't even have to be a whole process, it could've been one scene where one of them attempt to comfort her and fail because they fundamentally don't know how to display that level of kindness towards one another. It's that easy. Oh and Daeron? Fuck off. That was an ABYSMAL way to introduce him. Why does Otto need to remind Alicent that she has another son? What grandfather says "remember that third son you've always had and have forgotten about for the past 6 years? *wink, wink*" Like fuck off.

I think they are suffering from too many ideas all at one. And trying to rush major character arcs in order to get to the dance. But what makes GRRM writing and works so interesting and what made GOT (early seasons) so good was the fact they took time to develop the characters and show those lengthy discussions/character interactions. It's ABSOLUTELY insane we haven't seen the green siblings interact properly and may not at all. There is no reason for that, you can't put it down to "dysfunctional family dynamics" if you don't SHOW us the dysfunctional family dynamic and the siblings failing at communicating. B&C would've been the perfect time to show the audience WHY they can't comfort each other and HOW their family system has failed them. It's so deeply unbelievable to me and getting the actors justify it as it being a poor family dynamic is LAZY. Show the audience. Don't have your actors tell us.

[1d1195]

Physics V

By popular opinion, we have another installment of our college friends studying together. Please read the rest here: Physics, or if you don't feel like it, I left them just about to have hot chocolate and watch a movie.

You know me, this a bit of a mess and all over the place. I hope you like it anyway. It's been another tough week and honestly I don't see the following weeks getting much better. This was pretty therapeutic for me and I think it's cute even if it's a lot. Sorry for venting and ranting. Thank you for reading.

All fluff

4.4k words

Studying, physics, decorating, coffee, and hot chocolate... she was confident in these areas of her life. Confident that she knew what she was talking about. Harry, boys, and flirting...she wasn’t the least bit confident.

Her heart was thudding so loudly in her chest she could hardly hear the movie. She was a bit worried that Harry could hear how embarrassingly loud her heart was beating beside him. What movie did she even pick? Did she even pick it? If Harry picked it, she was going to have to excuse herself to use the bathroom and Google the plot so as not to embarrass herself further because she hadn’t a clue what had happened in the last half hour.

The middle cushion left a sizable distance between them, and all Harry could think about was how much he wanted to pull her across the desert of space between them, lay her across the length of the sofa, and kiss her until he forgot why he was even there. Harry watched the movie intently so he wouldn’t stare at her the whole time. He reached for the hot chocolate on the coffee table just so he would have something to do (and so he could get a longer glimpse of her pretty being at the other end of the couch).

He smiled softly. “Have y’seen this one?” He asked.

She shook her head. If she had, it wasn’t like she remembered it anyway. Not with Harry’s aura invading all her thoughts and making her forget her own name. “No...”

“Me either.” She was intently focused on her TV screen which gave Harry just a moment to gaze at her without being suspicious. The hot chocolate tasted extra good. Part of him thought it was merely because she was the one who made it. “Secret recipe?” He asked, putting the mug back on the coffee table.

A small smile played at her lips and Harry truly thought she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his whole life. “Uh...just add a hint of cinnamon.”

“S’really good.”

“I love hot chocolate,” she explained. “Have you ever seen those hot chocolate bars?” She asked. “Like on TikTok or Pinterest? Er...You probably don’t have Pinterest,” she backtracked. “Anyway...” she felt herself rambling and Harry was looking at her like she wasn’t. Like what she was saying was interesting and she wasn’t talking about something so silly.

“I haven’t, kitten,” his voice was so gentle. “Show me,” he suggested.

She shook her head. “No...s’nothing special. It’s just a bunch of little jars and things and you put it on the counter or a little bar cart or something...I don’t know. I think they’re cute.”

“They sound cute,” he said encouragingly hoping she would change her mind. She wouldn’t budge though.

“Um...maybe another time. I don’t want to interrupt the movie.” Harry nodded. His phone continued to vibrate on the coffee table beside his hot chocolate. He flipped it over, so the screen was faced down. “Are you sure you’re not needed elsewhere? I know we’re going to be spending a lot of time together, I wouldn’t want to take you away from your friends or whatever. I’m sure they have way better plans than a Christmas movie a month earlier than should be watched.”

Harry smirked to himself shaking his head, keeping his eyes on the movie. “No, love,” he said simply. “M’fine here, s’long as y’don’t mind m’company,” he didn’t look at her because he didn’t want to make her feel awkward; just in case she did want him to leave.

“I just know that I’m a little boring and I know you’re usually at parties and—”

“How do y’know that?” He smirked. He reached for the remote between their hot chocolate mugs and paused the movie before turning to look at her again.

Harry could see right through her, she was sure. Studying, physics, decorating, coffee, and hot chocolate... she was confident in these areas of her life. Confident that she knew what she was talking about. Harry, boys, and flirting...she wasn’t the least bit confident. Harry was this beautiful, perfect guy that every single girl on campus couldn’t stop talking about whenever he passed by. In the library she heard hushed whispers of Harry at parties with his friends. On a jog around campus, she heard girls swooning about him and how he was really good at beer pong. For Halloween he and his friends dressed up as firefighters and it was literally all anyone could talk about.

She blushed and shrugged. “I don’t know. Just hear things.”

He smiled, tilted his head at her in appreciation. “M’rather enjoying this evening,” he said softly. “S’nice t’relax and hang out with you.”

It felt way too good to be true.

Eventually their attention turned back to the movie. Then a second movie. Now it was nearing ten PM, and her eyes were burning a bit from the screen. Harry had gone to the bathroom while she cleaned up the hot chocolate mugs. She yawned, flopping back into her seat on the couch and Harry returned falling into his own spot. It felt odd he had his own spot already. She believed it was his and she thought maybe when he left, she would sit in it, just to soak up the heavenly scent of his cologne.

“D’you want t’watch another?” He asked.

She wanted to sleep but there was no way she was going to tell Harry to leave willingly. He would have to go on his own. She nodded. “Sure,” she said. “Can I get you anything?” She asked.

He shook his head. “M’fine, kitten,” he smiled sweetly.

But it was the third movie that did them in. Both fell asleep before even halfway through it. Her TV was set on a timer, so it turned off at one in the morning if it was on. But when Harry woke up in the dark room (except for the beautiful tree illuminating a gentle glow over her apartment) and looked at his phone, he saw it was almost two thirty in the morning.

Blinking against the brightness of his screen he turned his attention to the pretty girl snuggled in the corner of her sofa. He pulled one blanket off the back of the seat and rested it over her. He watched her sigh with relief as she nuzzled deeper into the back cushion. Harry didn’t want to leave her. Especially not alone on the couch. The lights from the tree created a golden effect and cast over her. Harry thought she was beautiful anyway, but this made him want to kneel before her and stare at her until his eyes fell out of his head.

But he didn’t want the tree to catch on fire either. He quietly unplugged it, making her apartment completely dark, and he fell back into the other end of her couch. Pulling another blanket around himself, he fell asleep almost immediately, that stretch of a couch cushion desert still aching him to the bone as it mocked him from between them.

*

“Shut. Up,” she hissed.

“You’re making Harry Styles pancakes, you’re so fucking stupid,” another voice whispered. “He fell asleep on our couch. Do you know how many girls would kill to be you?”

Harry could smell something sweet and assumed it had to be pancakes based on the conversation he heard so far. He smirked to himself. The sofa was warm and comfy. He wished she hadn’t left because he would have loved to see her expression when he woke up. The apartment was warm, and it felt like Christmas. Or maybe it was just because she seemed to be the embodiment of all good things like Christmas and it made him warm that way.

“Can you be quiet? You’re going to wake him,” she whispered. It was early. Harry hadn’t a chance to look at his phone yet but it was cold and felt like the sun had hardly risen.

“Babe,” the other girl sounded exhausted. “You have Harry Styles on your couch right now. He stayed in on a Friday night to decorate, watch Christmas movies, and drink hot chocolate with you. It’s a date.”

Harry’s heart was fluttering against his ribs. It felt so childish and silly, but he liked it. “I’m just tutoring him.”

“In what? Falling in love? Pancakes will seal the deal. I fell in love with you the first time you made pancakes. Pretty sure Mitch would leave me for your pancakes, and I can’t say I blame him.”

“They’re not even that special.”

“Oh my God.”

Harry needed to make some kind of indication that he was awake, but he didn’t know how. Fortunately, there was a knock on the door. Harry took that as his cue and yawned in exaggeration as he headed to the door. He rubbed his hand into his eye.

He could sense two pairs of eyes on his back as he headed to the door. “I told you she wouldn’t kill him,” Niall said as the door was pulled out of the way. “Louis was worried,” Niall said stepping around Harry.

“Please, come in,” Harry grumbled. Louis marched right past Harry and the poor girl looked so stunned he thought she might cry.

“It smells so good in here,” Louis remarked. “Hey love,” he waved to the sweet girl who looked utterly confused and nervous in the kitchen doorway.

“Uh...hi,” she said softly waving awkwardly back.

Niall dropped a bag on the sofa. “Louis was worried you may have killed Harry. Not that we’d blame you, darling. Can’t imagine having to tutor this sorry sap,” he explained.

Harry rolled his eyes and peeked in the bag to find an array of clothing and toiletries. He was a little grateful that Niall and Louis knew he would need it at the very least. Even if it was a bit forward. Harry finally took notice of how adorable she looked once more. She had changed her clothes. She wore cozy leggings and an oversized sweatshirt. All he wanted was to wrap her in his arms and kiss her until the end of time. “Sorry for just barging over, love,” Louis said. “But we just wanted to rescue you if Harry was bothering you...plus if you did kill him that would make our life a bit harder since his name is on the lease. Not that we’d blame you, of course. I love your Christmas decorations. It’s so nice and cozy in here.”

“I’m Sarah,” the other girl offered; trying to help the poor thing. She looked so rattled Harry wanted to scoop her into his arms and protect her from his friends and their annoying, silly, banter.

“D-do you all want pancakes?” She asked.

“Oh, is that what smells so good? Yes, please, darling,” Niall said excitedly and dropped onto the couch like he had been here a thousand times. But that was her spot and Harry didn’t like Niall sitting there. Where were the two of them going to sit?

“May as well call Mitch and get him over here,” Sarah smiled with unadulterated enjoyment in her eyes as she pressed her phone to her ear.

“Okay...um...I’ll be right back,” she said hurrying back to the kitchen.

Harry glared at his friends. “You’re both insane,” he grumbled and followed her and the scent of pancakes. She was dropping batter into the middle of a griddle spread across two of the stovetop elements. He couldn’t deny his friends were right. It smelled heavenly in the kitchen. “M’sorry, kitten,” he said quickly.

“What for? It’s nice your friends came looking for you,” she smiled. “Pancakes are easy for a crowd too,” she promised.

He sighed. She was a literal delight, and he didn’t deserve that. “I can have us all leave. I’ve obviously overstayed m’welcome. And s’rude of them t’invite themselves over,” he explained. “Does it bother Sarah?”

She shook her head. “It’s really no trouble at all. Sarah doesn’t mind in the slightest. She was just coming to check on me and things. She was...surprised to see you,” she shrugged.

“Love, I told you you’re supposed to text me if you’re making pancakes!” A new voice shouted from the other room. Sarah walked by her and Harry, rolling her eyes at the sound of her boyfriend.

“These pancakes must be something,” Harry grinned sweetly.

“I guess, I just put vanilla extract in them. And sometimes I add syrup to the batter,” she shrugged. “It’s not really a secret,” but Harry thought that maybe, much like her hot chocolate, it simply tasted better because she made it and did it with so much affection for her friends and essentially strangers.

“Well thank you, kitten,” he said kindly.

She nodded. “I...I have to go to the bookstore from nine to two. You can stay here until then if you’d like. Sarah can give you a key or something if she and Mitch leave.”

Harry was a little take aback that she really was going to just leave Harry and his friends alone in her pretty Christmassy apartment. He bit the inside of his lip. “Yeah?” He asked.

She nodded. “Yeah,” she shrugged.

“I jus’ have t’run a few errands...but I bet I’ll beat y’back here,” he told her watching her movements so effortlessly in front of the stove. The entire time she was flipping pancakes and cutting up fruit to go with it. She grabbed plates, whipped cream, and syrup. “Well, maybe we’ll never leave,” he smiled softly.

Biting the inside of her lip she smiled to herself. Because honestly, that didn’t sound so bad. “You’re welcome to shower if you want. Just have Sarah turn on the water for you. The lever is a little tricky when you first use it.”

*

Harry was sad to find she had left while he was in the shower. So maybe it wasn’t as early as he thought it was—he still hadn’t looked at his phone. Everyone was silent as they stuffed their faces with fruit and pancakes. Niall kept making obscene moaning noises.

“If you don’t ask her out, I will,” he groaned.

Harry glared at him. Sarah and Mitch smirked knowingly at one another as they ate silently. “Harry has been over the moon about his new tutor,” Louis told Sarah. It felt like Louis and Niall were talking about their son to his potential girlfriend’s parents. It was so embarrassing. “He has hope he’ll pass now. He couldn’t stop talking about her.”

“Thank you,” Harry grumbled around the fluffiest, yummiest pancake he had ever eaten. It was even difficult to feign his annoyance at his friends.

Sarah smiled with that same unadulterated pleasure she had before. “She’s really excited too,” she promised.

“She’s pretty busy,” Niall remarked.

Mitch nodded. “She likes to be busy,” he shrugged.

Harry kept a silent note of that in his mind. “Louis, Niall, will you do the dishes?” Harry asked.

“Aw, Dad, do we have to?” Louis whined.

He rolled his eyes. “Spotless, when I get back.”

*

She was refolding T-shirts and putting away sweatshirts back on the right racks when the ping of the bookstore door signaled that someone was entering. She glanced at her watch to see that it was almost fifteen minutes before close. She knew she should have put the closed sign up and the metal grate down before she started on the returns. All she wanted to do was go back to her apartment and hope that Harry really was still there.

“Hey beautiful,” his perfect, honey-warmed voice called. She dropped the textbook she was bringing back to it’s spot. Narrowly avoiding her foot with it’s heavy weight.

“Oh,” she blinked. “Hi Harry.”

“Hi, kitten. Sorry t’scare you... Thought y’might want a ride back since s’cold out,” he smiled spinning his ring of keys around his index finger. She blinked.

“Oh, thank you. You didn’t have to go out of your way...or mess up your plans,” she blushed bending to grab the textbook.

He shook his head. “No way, love. Jus’ wanted t’make sure y’weren’t cold. No plans except t’study with you,” he smiled. “Those pancakes were amazing. M’sorry I missed y’leaving.”

She was so stunned by him appearing out of nowhere and once more just being so...nice. She felt her insides turning into mush and her brain was glitching out. How was she supposed to continue tutoring him when he was so utterly breathtaking? Just his kind nature made her speechless.

“It’s okay, I’m sorry I didn’t get to—”

“Niall and Louis cleaned up for you, too.”

“They didn’t need to—”

“Of course, they did, kitten. Y’fed them. S’the least they could do actually.”

She was worried if she spoke again he would interrupt her and she was officially out of things to say. “Um...” she slid the book back onto the shelf with the ones that looked just like it. “I just have to...do a few more things until close.”

“I’ll be here,” he said wandering the aisles looking at things. “Won’t touch anything either,” he promised with a wink. “Can’t remember the last time I was in here,” he murmured.

She bit the inside of her lip and as he meandered and headed to the gate to close, finally.  As she pulled the gate down, there was a group of girls who caught sight of the brown curls that were looking at the array of clothing for parents. “Hey kitten?” He called. The group turned to the sound of his voice. One practically gasped. Another gaped openly as they realized Harry was talking to her.

“Yeah?” She called back sounding so unsure.

“D’you think m’mum would actually like this?” He asked holding up a long sleeve shirt with the college’s name, logo, and “Mom” written on the front. “Like would y’get this for your mum?” He asked.

She could feel their gazes on her and she knew they were thinking that it was insane that Harry was talking to her. “Um...I would probably just get her a regular item. I think the mom ones are a little...on the nose?” She explained.

He smiled. “Got it,” Harry carefully folded the shirt and placed it back just as he found it.

“Hey Harry!” One girl called from the gate. “Missed you at the party last night!”

Harry winked at her as he walked toward the gate. She didn’t pay any mind to their conversation, knowing they were taking turns staring at her while Harry stood caged in from them.

After she finished all the closing tasks she grabbed her purse and put it across her body before she slowly walked toward Harry touching up the displays as she went to escape them. “Are you going out tonight?”

“Probably not,” he shrugged. “M’really focusing on m’physics class,” he explained. “I need all the help I can get...right, kitten?”

Part of her felt stupid for answering to the little pet name as if it were her own. But she couldn’t help but turn to the sound of his voice calling her the name and then meeting ten pairs of eyes—eight of which were glaring at her. Two of which were so green and so gentle.

“You’re not so bad,” she murmured.

“Sorry ladies,” he shrugged. “Maybe next weekend. Ready, love?” He asked turning his back to the group who continued to stare at him and glare at her.

Was she ready to get out of there? Yes. Very much so.

*

Harry let her walk in first and closed the door behind him. She kicked her shoes off and headed to the kitchen. She needed a glass of water before they started studying. Sarah already texted her to let her know that someone told someone told someone that Harry wasn’t going out in favor of studying with some girl.

When he asked her if she could tutor, the entire dining hall stared at her as if they had never seen her before—like she appeared from thin air the moment Harry talked to her. Now they heard Harry call her sweet names and ditch his party habits all because he had to study. On a Saturday.

Harry stood in the middle of the sitting room waiting for her reaction—whatever it would be. She returned silently—sans water. Her eyes were huge. Harry smiled kindly.

“Everything alright, kitten?” He asked.

“You...” she stared at him. “You... made me a hot chocolate bar?”

Harry shrugged. “S’least I can do,” he looked a little surprised. He didn’t understand her confusion. This seemed only natural that he would do this. It seemed obvious to him that he was...infatuated with her so readily, easily. How could he be anything but? She was intelligent, beautiful, and utterly kind. The embodiment of happiness and holidays.

She returned to the kitchen to look at the tray set up on the counter. There were mason jars of varying sizes. Displayed perfectly. Marshmallows, chocolate chips, candy canes, little wooden scoops, cookies, sprinkles. It looked like Harry had raided the entire display of Christmas goodies at Target.

The anxiety she felt from Harry being so nice was overwhelming. “Y-you didn’t have to do that,” there was a lump in her throat. It was just so nice she could feel tears threatening, aching in the back of her eyes.

“Kitten?” He asked gently.

She didn’t want to look at him. She wanted to stare at the kind gesture he had so thoughtfully made while she was at work. Seeing the dishes were done from breakfast too...by his friends. Everything about Harry was unlike any guy she had ever met.

But...he was so...him. He was nothing like her. He was confident, gorgeous, funny, and sweet. He probably dated girls that could drink her under the table. Or wouldn’t mind kissing him in front of an entire party. Who could blame them really? Harry had lips that deserved to be kissed every moment of the day. He looked like he should be kissed in front of audiences simply because he was too beautiful not to be. She was certain the group of girls outside the bookstore would kiss him without a care in the world.

He would never, ever want to kiss or be around someone that had her nose stuck in a physics book and could hardly talk to a guy without rambling or feeling awkward.

“Thank you,” she murmured politely. The words came out breathlessly because if she added any volume she would have resorted to tears and Harry would someone comfort her and make her feel even worse than she already did about the whole predicament.

“Are y’alright, love?” He asked, concern dripped in his voice. He reached out like he was going to touch her back but stopped before his hand got to her.

She nodded silently, unable to look away from the little ribbons tied like perfectly wrapped presents around the mason jars. “Uh...yeah. Do you want to study?” She cleared her throat.

He frowned. “Um...sure.”

She felt like she lost some game that she didn’t even know she was playing.

Harry watched her leaving the kitchen and felt so lost. Was it not obvious that he adored her? The hot chocolate bar was hardly anything in comparison to what she deserved. Right as she crossed the threshold, he grabbed her hand and tugged her back toward him. “Did I do something wrong?” He asked.

She shook her head, not looking up at his eyes. “No! Of course not, Harry.”

“Y’seem...sad...I made a chocolate bar for you,” he pouted.

Sighing, she tried not to think about the electric feeling of Harry’s hand in hers. It made her nervous that her hand was starting to sweat immediately. He hadn’t done anything. He skimmed his thumb along the back of it. “It’s...” she swallowed thickly avoiding his gaze. “It’s so nice, Harry,” she whispered.

“Then why—”

“I just...don’t want to fall for you,” she explained.

He dropped her hand like it hurt her. She ached to hold his hand again. It was so unfair. “Oh.”

The silence was deafening. “I understand if you don’t want me to tutor you,” she bit the inside of her lip.

“Kitten, you’re literally m’only hope,” he reminded her. “If y’don’t want to, though...s’fine. I’ll figure it out. M’not your responsibility. I can always go on YouTube—”

She shook her head. “No,” she swallowed. “That’s not what I want,” she promised. “Really—”

“Love,” he brought a hand to her face and brushed his thumb across her lips. Her sentence was no longer in her mind. Everything was gone. She only knew Harry’s name, the color green, and that his thumb was touching her lips.

“You’re way too cool and hot and confident for me,” she whispered. All he had to do was look at her. It was like a magic spell. The words fell out of her. His cologne was surely a potion. Throwing all coherent thought out of her mind. She wasn’t an upperclassmen physics student. She was a dumb girl infatuated with a guy that was way too good for her.

“Oh, kitten,” he frowned. “I...” his unfairly tanned cheeks turned the most beautiful, rosy pink. Like someone put makeup on him. “You’re...you’re much too hard on yourself. You’re way too good for me. Gorgeous, intelligent, kind...” he shook his head. “You’re the whole package, love.” Her heart felt like it was going to explode out of her chest. Of course, his cologne was sending her into a fog of confusion and only thoughts of Harry. “Kitten,” he cooed. “M’not saying this jus’ because I desperately want...no need you t’fall for me...but if y’like someone...”

“Harry, those girls are the ones you deserve—” her voice cracked with the idea that Harry needed her for anything.

“M’so out of your league,” he chuckled. “Maybe y’shouldn’t fall for me,” he winked. “But...isn’t... there a basic Law of Attraction in Physics?” He asked.

“Harry, that’s from like week one of Physics I.”

“Kitten, m’trying t’flirt on your level. Will you...?” Her lips felt glued shut. “Any particular force that draw two objects together?” She nodded mutely. “Think we have a particular force here,” he caught one of his fingers through her front belt loop and pulled her toward him. Her whole body was on fire. There was a clean sink behind her. A hot chocolate bar on her counter.

And Harry was enacting a force of attraction on her that she never would have dreamed of as he tilted his head and locked his gaze on her lips.

--

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[cherry-holmes]

Glimpse of a life with Javier Peña (series)

Chapter 2

MAIN MASTERLIST

Summary: Javi fucked up things with you.

SERIES MASTERLIST PART 3

Pairing: Javier Peña x Female Reader

Word count: +2.5k

Warnings: none. No use of Y/N.

A/N: Chapter 2 is here! As always I want to thank you for your support! I hope you like this one and be ready for moreeee!🫶🏻✨ I love reading your comments and reblogs, so keep the coming✨

I’m open for requests. Javier Peña, Joel Miller, Din Djarin, Loki, BBC Sherlock, Supernatural…😏

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Work made time fly quickly. You had a lot of paperwork to do every day, and it seemed endless – spending hours reading reports and files and then translating them on your typewriter. However, something had been making the last two weeks feel easier, or better to say, someone.

Every afternoon, Javier Peña visited your office to hand you his and Murphy's daily reports. You wondered when Messina would withdraw Javier's punishment, but you weren't sure if you wanted her to do it. You didn't have a lot of friends at work since your department consisted of only one employee – you. You had some conversations with secretaries and officers during your lunch breaks, but you always returned alone to your small office.

So, when Javier visited and talked with you for at least a couple of minutes, it made you feel less isolated in the demanding work environment. The couple of days when he didn't visit because he was on a raid out of the base, you couldn't help but feel a bit disappointed. You became accustomed to the smell of cigarettes and men's cologne that lingered in the air whenever he was around. Sometimes he also smelled like black coffee, and on his roughest days, even like whiskey.

It became a small but pleasant routine, these short daily visits from Javier. You'd sometimes share a funny story or a piece of office gossip, and occasionally, you'd laugh together. Those brief moments helped create a sense of camaraderie between you and the charming DEA agent.

Until one particular day, as Javier handed you the reports, he leaned casually against your office doorframe, a playful grin tugging at his lips. "You know," he began, "I've been thinking. Maybe you and I should grab a drink after work one of these days. Get to know each other a little better, outside of this crazy office."

His proposition took you by surprise. You hadn't expected this kind of invitation. Your mind raced as you tried to decide how to respond. Javier watched you intently, his eyes filled with a mix of curiosity and something else you couldn't quite put your finger on.

You were about to say yes immediately, but you knew better than to let yourself fall into the den of the beast so easily. You had heard a lot about Javier Peña and his charming ways, known to lead any woman to his bed. And although you had been enjoying the friendly conversations with him, you didn't want to rush into anything too quickly.

You met his gaze, your own eyes locking with his. "Javier," you began carefully, "I appreciate the offer, I really do. But, I have to be honest, you have quite the reputation, and I don't want to misinterpret our friendship."

Javier's smirk hesitated, as he tried to process your response. He looked like it was the first time he'd been rejected, and it caught him off guard. He straightened his back and moved his hand as if dismissing the importance of it all.

"Wow," he said with a touch of sarcasm, "I never thought I'd see the day when someone turned down a night with Javier Peña. Guess I overestimated our connection."

His words stung, and you could see a flicker of hurt in his eyes, even though he was trying to play it cool. You had unintentionally wounded his pride, and it seemed he was determined to strike back with a hint of meanness.

"It's not about our connection, Javier," you replied evenly. "It's about respecting boundaries and not rushing into something we might regret later."

«That I might regret later».

He sighed, his tone softening just a bit. "Fair enough. I get it. I won't push," he said, his playful charm replaced by a more somber demeanor. "Let's just forget I ever brought it up. We can stick to our friendly chats. No harm done."

The atmosphere in the room grew tense, and you both lapsed into an uneasy silence. It was clear that your rejection had affected him more than he let on, and you couldn't help but feel a sting of guilt for hurting his feelings.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

He didn't mean it.

"I never thought I'd see the day when someone turned down a night with Javier Peña"?

What the fuck was that shit?

As Javier left your office, he felt guilty and embarrassment for saying that. He knew his behavior wasn't correct, but the disappointment he felt really took him by surprise. He had been rejected a couple of times, he was prepared for your possible refusal. But what he didn't expect was the heavy weight he would feel when he heard you saying no.

For weeks, he had been feeling increasingly drawn to you, always wanting to be near you. He even used Messina's punishment as an excuse to visit your office, even after she withdrew it. Javier had finally come to the disconcerting realization that he was infatuated with you. So, he thought that perhaps by taking you out for a drink and even having you in his bed, he would get over it.

But as he got into his truck, he felt truly disillusioned. His ill-advised words had driven a split between you, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he had ruined any chance of building something more meaningful. Javier's fear of commitment was something that never kept him awake at night, not even after everything that had happened with Lorraine. He felt genuinely sorry for leaving her at the altar thirteen years ago, but he always told himself that she was much better without him. She needed someone with a lot more commitment than he had. Now, the topic seemed to be haunting him.

He wasn't mad because you hurt his ego; he was mad because you hurt the feelings he didn't know he had.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Javier didn't come to your office again the following week. It wasn't the first time a man stopped talking to you after you rejected him. You were used to it. The moment you made it clear you wouldn't give them what they wanted, they magically lost interest in you, sometimes even resorting to calling you boring or, occasionally, a bitch.

You could sense this double standard in society. On one hand, they encourage women to freely explore their sexuality, which is great, but on the other hand, if you prefer to wait for the right time and the right person, you get labeled as "boring" or "prudish." It's as if there's no middle ground, no understanding that everyone has their own path and timing.

You had always believed in waiting for the right person, the one you truly cared about, to share such an intimate moment. It wasn't about religion, you didn't even believe on the false concept of ''purity'' or ''santity''; it was simply your personal choice.

So you thought Javier was just another man like many. It made you feel disappointed because you really liked him, but there wasn't anything you could do about it.

As you entered the office dining room, you spotted your usual group of female friends. They greeted you, and you joined them. All of you spoke in Spanish.

"Hello" you smiled as you greeted as you took your seat. The chatter at the table was lively, filled with laughter and bits of gossip about the office. These women had become your companions, and you cherished the moments you spent with them during lunch breaks.

As the conversation flowed, one of your friends, Marta, leaned in and asked in a teasing tone, "So, we've been seeing Agent Peña hanging around your office quite often lately. What's the story there?"

The mention of Javier made you pause for a moment, and you glanced at your friends, slightly surprised that they had noticed. "Oh, that," you said, attempting to play it off casually. "It's because of Messina's punishment. She made him handed me his reports."

Ana raised an eyebrow, a mischievous glint in her eye. "Messina's punishment? Come on, you were chatting for like two weeks straight. That punishment lasts only a couple of days."

You felt your cheeks flush as you tried to maintain your composure. Your friends were sharp, and they clearly had their suspicions. "Well," you began, searching for words, "maybe he did something to bother her again. You know how bossy she can get."

The women at the table exchanged knowing looks, and one of them, Maria, couldn't help but tease, "Hmm, a bad boy indeed. He must really that bad."

You sighed internally. With a sheepish smile, you finally confessed, "Okay, fine. We've been talking a lot. But it's just work-related, I promise."

Marta grinned. "Work-related, huh? Well, you can't blame us for being curious. Agent Peña isn't known for spending that much time in one place, especially chatting with a colleague."

You shrugged, realizing that your friends had seen through your explanation. "I guess we've been getting along. It's nice to have someone to talk to during those long work hours."

Your friends exchanged knowing glances again, and Maria leaned closer, her voice hushed. "Come on, spill the beans. Is there something more going on between you two?"

You hesitated, then decided to be honest. "No, there isn't. It's just work and friendly conversations. Javier is a nice guy, and I enjoy our talks."

Maria leaned in again, her tone more serious this time. "That's good to hear then, because, you know, we found out that he slept with Kelly. You know her, didn't you? The blonde one."

You paused, your heart sinking at the revelation. It didn't surprised you, but you felt a hole in your chest.

"Oh," you tried to composed yourself, "Well for them."

Sofia chimed in, her expression concerned. "Yeah, we just don't want you to get hurt. These things usually don't end well. Men like him, they tend to move on pretty quickly."

"You don't have nothing to worry about," you tell them, mixing your food but you had lost your appetite, "There's nothing between us, so Javier is free to do anyone he please."

The conversation moved on to other topics, but you couldn't help but feel a ache of disappointment and confusion. Why did Javier's involvement with someone else affect you like this? You told yourself it didn't matter, that you had your own principles and choices to stick to. But deep down, something had shifted, and you couldn't quite put your finger on it.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You and Javier had crossed paths around the office a couple of times during the following days, but neither of you made the effort to talk to each other. It was a bit awkward, but nothing that you actually mourned. You had heard that he spent at least two more nights with Kelly, until apparently, as you heard from Martha, she asked him to be more than just friends, and he said no. It wasn't a surprise; he had done that to more women at work. Everybody knew him.

On the other hand, Javier was desperate to get you out of his dreams. He told himself that he couldn't put a name to what he felt toward you, but the reality was that he just wanted to accept it. He had feelings for you, more than just wanting to be with you in bed. He wasn't in love - yet - but he did feel something. Your refusal had hit him harder than he expected. He couldn't deny that he cared more about you than he ever thought he would. But he had no idea how to approach you now.

The dimly lit room was filled with the lingering scent of passion and cigarette as Javier stood by the window, staring up at the distant lights of the city. Helena, lying on his bed, propped herself up on one elbow.

"Javi, what's been bothering you lately?," Helena asked, her voice soft and concerned.

Javier turned his head to look at her, his dark eyes meeting hers. He sighed and ran a hand through his tousled hair. "It's nothing, Helena, just work stuff," he replied, trying to dismiss her question.

Helena wasn't convinced. She had known Javier long enough to recognize when something was troubling him. "You can't fool me, Javier," she said with a knowing smile. "I can recognize a heart that's burdened."

He looked at her, his guard dropping slightly. "It's complicated," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

Helena knew better than to press him for more details. As she watched Javier's back, her feelings were a complex mix of desire, longing, and a touch of sadness. She had known for a while that Javier was not just her client; she had developed a connection beyond the physical, even though Javier didn't.

She felt a heartache, waves of jealousy running through her veins, knowing that she could never compete with the other woman in his thoughts. Helena understood the nature of their arrangement – she was a hooker, and he was a DEA agent. Their worlds were inherently different, and she had resigned herself to the fact that he would never see her as more than a source of pleasure and information. Yet, despite her own rationalizations, Helena couldn't help but yearn for something more with Javier. She had developed genuine feelings for him over time, even though she knew it was a one-sided affair.

After Helena left his apartment, the night grew darker, and Javier lay awake in his bed, his mind racing with thoughts of you. He couldn't deny the growing feelings he had for you, and he knew he needed to do something about it. The distraction had reached a point where he couldn't ignore it any longer.

So he had made a decision. Tomorrow, he was going to approach you. He would apologize for the way he talked to you the other day, ask you out for a friendly drink, and see where things could go. It was a bold move for him, someone not accustomed to such personal pursuits.

As he mentally crafted his approach, he couldn't help but smile at the thought of your bright eyes and the way your laughter rang in his ears during those brief conversations in your office. Javier was convinced that there was something special about you, something that drew him in despite his best efforts to resist.

In the morning, Javier waited impatiently during the usual meeting in the office. He couldn't concentrate even when it was his turn to talk about the recent capture of one of Escobar's hitmen. Finally, as they left the meeting room, Murphy approached him and patted his back.

''Everything okay, Javi?'' he asked. Javier tried to keep it cool and waved a hand like it was nothing.

''I couldn't sleep well,'' he simply said as both agents arrived at their workplaces.

Steve chuckled, sitting at his desk and starting to gather all his paperwork. ''You were thinking about her, weren't you?'' he dared to ask. Javier and Steve trusted each other enough to tease one another. They never crossed the line but considered themselves friends.

Peña looked at him with annoyance, but it wasn't deep.

''Shut up, Murphy,'' he groaned as he gathered his own paperwork but didn't sit at his desk.

Steve looked at him with a grin, knowing his partner well enough to guess his next move.

''Two weeks without seeing her, and now you'll use Messina's punishment again as an excuse just to see her? What changed, Javi?'' he mocked.

''I told you to shut the fuck up,'' Javi said as he turned back toward your office, and Steve laughed.

Javier tried to remember the words he had spent the night trying to formulate and memorize. He was actually nervous. But just as he reached your doorway, his heart sank. He saw you engaged in conversation with Diego, another colleague from the office. The sight of you two talking, sharing a moment he wasn't a part of, left him feeling like an outsider. You were smiling, and there was a slight blush on your cheeks.

But not as flushed as she was with me, an intrusive thought echoed in the back of his head. He quickly turned away, his plans disrupted, and retreated to his own desk. Javier couldn't help but wonder if he had missed his chance with you. The uncertainty gnawed at him, leaving him in a state of frustration and craving.

NEXT CHAPTER

[riddle-me-ri]

a/n: don't mind me being super self indulgent again asdfgh. I just really enjoyed the dynamic I made in Zeroing In with Bigby and a singer/performing reader. I may or may not make a smutty part two we will see lol. Hope y’all enjoy!

Content Warning: Strong language, attempted sexual assault, brief mentions of sexual harrassment, some violence.

Word Count: 2.3 k

Bigby Wolf x F!Reader - Take Me Home

As a long time performer, you know how to work the crowd with your musical numbers.

You knew you should probably be looking around and engaging with other audience members.

You just couldn't help it though.

Especially when he was around and seemed to genuinely be enjoying himself for once.

Bigby Wolf kept his word when he said he would come around and see you perform whenever he had a chance and not just show up searching for perps.

He's managed to come by at least once every other week, and needless to say, it always was the highlight of your week.

You two have tried to make plans outside of both your work schedules, but it's been difficult to manage between the long nights you both kept and Bigby occasionally dipping in and out of the picture.

Don't let him be on a case either. He stays clear of you like a bad omen. You know he's worried about getting you somehow involved in whatever the case entails, but you did wish he could share more of his worries onto you so he didn't have to carry so much.

You two managed to settle somehow with these interludes of eye contact and small knowing smiles.

At least until one night when you weren't smiling anymore.

During your act, you got close to the edge of the stage and teased those up front, just like any other night–

Until you felt a sweaty palm clamp around your ankle and almost yank you into the audience below.

You barely remember hazy glimpses of everything that happened afterward.

A shrill sound rang through the live band and filled the club.

It took hours later for you to realize that was…you…screaming in shock.

The man's other hand barely touched your inner thigh, clear intent of fully grabbing and dragging you into his lap until he instantly let go.

Before you even tried to push the man's hands away, he let go.

You saw Bigby hovering over the man.

He had slammed the man's face into the hard wood table, the cheap white linen doing nothing to comfort the assault as it started to stain with blood.

You caught a glimpse of yellow in Bigby’s eyes.

You couldn't make out any words anyone was saying. It was all a murmuring cacophony of surprised, worried, and tense patrons.

Your skin ran cold, and your breathing hitched.

The next thing you recall was getting up and darting back towards your dressing room.

Anything to get away from what just happened.

~

“Aww man, I think you broke my fucking nose.”

“You're lucky I don't break every bone in your goddamn body, starting with your grimy little hands.” Bigby snarled, with half a mind to slam the asshole's face again.

He did settle for twisting the guy’s arm tighter as he slapped handcuffs on him.

“Hey, hey, what the fuck man? I didn't do nothin’!” The man defended as he tried to sit back up, blood dripping down his nose and over his lips.

“You touched her inappropriately, pretty sure that files under assault.” Bigby roughly lifted the man up from his seat and dropped him to his feet, causing the man to stumble some.

“Oh please, she was teasing me! Practically asking for it!” The man spat as he got his footing before Bigby dragged him out of the club.

Bigby tried to keep his growl down but whether or not he succeeded he frankly didn't care at the time.

At least until he was out of public view.

As the two began the walk to the Woodland and the coast was clear, Bigby snatched the man by the baby hairs on the back of his neck and pulled his head back.

The man yelped in pain.

“Listen here fucker, she didn't ask you for fucking shit. She was doing her job, last thing she needs is a bunch of grabby dickheads like you that can't keep his hands to him-fucking-self.”

“Is she your’s?”

Bigby blinked. “What?”

“You fuckin’ her or somethin’, Wolf? Never seen you get all up in arms over some whore.”

Bigby dragged the man into a nearby alley and smacked the man's body and face directly against a damp cold brick wall.

“Ow! The fuck man, you-aaah?” The man winced in pain as claws began protruding from Bigby's fingers, pricking the skin of the man's neck.

“Listen here, you sorry piece of shit. Doesn't fucking matter who she's with or what she does. You don't get to fucking touch her–you don't get to do what you damn well please. Understand?” Bigby growled, his teeth slowly growing into the “what big teeth you have,” territory.

For the first time since the encounter started, the man began quivering in terror.

“Y-y-yeah, yeah, understood…just-just do what you gotta do…please don't hurt me, man, please! It was a mistake, h-honest!”

Bigby got closer to the man's face one last time and snarled. A final warning.

Usually, Bigby would feel bad about making anyone beg for him not to hurt them. He'd be disappointed that they would automatically assume he would.

For this guy however, he wanted to muster up that same level of fear you likely felt when he grabbed you and then some.

Bigby backed off once he began smelling the unmistakable hint of piss through the night air.

“Just keep your mouth shut the rest of the way, or it'll be the last mistake you ever make.”

The quicker he locked this asshole up, the quicker he could get back to check up on you.

~

You sat there in front of your vanity with your head hung low and the lights dimmed.

Still frazzled and stunned from the moment.

Somehow, the man's slimy touch lingered on your skin, and you wanted nothing more than to dip your leg into some kind of disinfecting acid.

You took a deep breath and admitted that the second best option besides the acid is to go home and take a long scolding shower until the hot water ran out.

You rose from your seat and began shedding your clothes that used to make you feel so confident and sexy…but in the moment you just felt disgusted.

Then you heard a knock.

You assumed it was your boss checking on you. “I'll be out in a minute, Carol…just gimme a second..”

“Uhh…it's Bigby.”

You freezed for the second time that night.

You had completely forgotten about him. Until his voice reminded you of what he did, how he saved you, how he looked when he did it.

“Bigby? Oh, uh, hang on.” You darted across your dressing room and snatched a silky maroon robe that hung over your dressing screen.

You took a deep breath, a desperate attempt to calm your shot nerves.

Suddenly, a comforting warmth draped over your body as you laid eyes on Bigby. Like somehow, he could protect you from this lingering fear that resonated in you like he did before when it happened.

“H-Hey…”

“Hey,” he responded. “I wanted to check in on ya…how are you holding up?”

You gulped. “F-Fine I suppose, all things considered…I know it could have been worse, and I always knew I was at risk, but nothing prepares you for when it happens, you know?”

“Yeah, but you shouldn't feel at risk for something you do for a living.”

You exhaled a chuckle. “Says the sheriff who's at risk quite literally all the time.”

Bigby shook his head. “You know what I mean. That asshole had no right to be touching you…”

He sighed. “What happened tonight was not your fault…I hope you know that at the very least.”

You hugged your arms around yourself, your hands sliding up and down your upper arms as you gazed at the floor. “Yeah, I know…”

There was a beat of silence before you felt a warm hand lightly squeeze your shoulder. You followed the hand with bruised knuckles back to Bigby's face.

One of your hands came up and rested on top of his hand that was on your shoulder.

“Thank you, Bigby…” You squeezed his hand back gratefully. “At the end of the day…I'm just grateful that you were there.”

Bigby can't recall the last time anyone ever said those words about him or his help. He always made things worse, more difficult, or made Fables regretful for getting him involved.

It felt nice to be appreciated, and it felt even more sweet and genuine coming from you.

“I'm glad I was there too…”

He allowed you to drag your soft thumb along his knuckles for a moment. Both of you enjoyed the soothing silence and close proximity. You found yourself feeling more at ease each second he was there.

Until a question popped into your mind. “C-Can I ask what happened to him? Like where he is now?” Suddenly, the thought of trekking home became cumbersome.

“I've got him in a holding cell for now. I'll be presenting the case to the Business Office tomorrow morning some time…”

Bigby reluctantly pulled his hand back, you already missing its warmth and soothing weight.

“Although, full disclosure, even if he is found guilty… the time and punishment for sexual harassment is ridiculously short and sweet…”

You nodded. “I had a feeling, but Carol told me he won't be coming around anymore. She has started a banned list and is trying to invest in more security.”

“If you need me to…”

“Bigby, I can't ask you to do that. You already have every other Fable to worry about…”

“I do, but you come first….or at least that's how I wish it could be, if I can help it.”

You blinked, your mind racing with countless meanings to what he was implying.

“Besides, I think you're the only one that really appreciates my help anyhow.” Bigby muttered into his shoulder, but still clear enough for you to hear.

“I'll always appreciate you Bigby…like how I appreciate your offer, but I still can't ask you to do that…I know you will protect me when you can and that I can rely on you and honestly in the world we live in now, that's more than enough.”

Your heart swelled at the soft smile that stretched across his face.

“I guess I can accept that.” He reluctantly conceded. “Is there at least anything I can do for you now? Anything at all before we both call it a night?”

After talking to him, you have begun to feel much calmer, like you could shake off tonight's events. You know you could have gotten to that point yourself, but Bigby made it a whole lot easier and quicker.

You almost felt childish and selfish for this request, but you didn't want the opportunity to have him to yourself longer pass.

“I, uh, still have to walk home….if you don't mind walking with me? It's not far from the Woodland, just one block before it…”

“You don't have to convince me, and I did say anything. Just let me know when you're ready.” He offered a sincere smile.

“You wanna wait inside? I didn't even realize I didn't invite you in.” You giggled as you realized he was still standing in the hallway across the threshold of your dressing room door.

“Uhh…sure, if you're fine with it.” Bigby walked in and took a slow glance over your dressing room.

“More than fine. Here, you can have a seat on the sofa over there. I just gotta change real quick.” You explained as you rounded the corner and went behind your dressing screen.

You couldn't fight the pep in your step, having him back in your vicinity. You didn't feel on edge or uncomfortable to be yourself. You felt safe.

Bigby kept looking around. He was observant to a fault, especially thanks to his senses that don't let him miss anything.

He noticed the Polaroids of you and likely your co-workers and friends bordered along your vanity mirror.

He took note of a couple empty bottles that were in your trash can, he deduced it must be a favorite of yours.

He also caught an almost empty container of your body spray that was the source of your sweet scent.

Not that he'd say it out loud, but if you asked him you didn't need the spray, your own scent was intoxicating on its own.

Bigby shuffled a bit in his seat as your own smell became more prominent once he saw your robe hanging over the screen folds you hid behind.

He kept darting his eyes around the room, trying to distract himself from thinking of you so intimately despite the close quarters and the small distance between him and your naked form.

Bigby shook his head to try and shake the thoughts out. He doesn't want to screw this up, not like how he always does. You've been through enough as it is.

Thankfully, you came out soon from behind the screen. You wore a long sleeve sweater of your favorite color that revealed your shoulders and some pants.

“All right, I'm ready…thanks again, Bigby.” You stood in front of him and rubbed your hand up and down your arm, playing with the sleeve.

“Hey, like I said.” He stood up at his full height, and you had to look up instead of down at him. “Not a problem.”

He walked over to the door and swiftly opened the door. “After you…”

“Why thank you, sir.” You giggled bemused before walking out the door with Bigby walking beside you.

Carol waved to both of you and told you to take the next couple of days off to recover and not worry about anything.

You sighed. Another small weight taken off your shoulder, you weren't sure if you would be able to get back on stage, so it was relieving to hear you had the next couple of days off.

As you and Bigby exited the building, the cold night air hit both of you. Almost instinctively, you grabbed for Bigby's hand, who didn't seem to mind, and gently returned the grasp.

Bigby gave you a supportive nudge.

“Well, lead the way…”

[yolatirra]

Some Thoughts about Arcane Season 2, Especially Relating to Potential Time Travel

Pt 1: Isha

I think Isha has something to do with Ekko and time travel.

Something that keeps nagging at me about Isha is that we don't actually know anything about her. She showed up in S2E2 running from some guys and then literally dropped into Jinx's lap. We still don't know why she was running from them. We don't know where she came from. We have no idea who she is.

One analysis videos I watched, which I've now sadly lost track of, pointed out that there are a TON of Firelights symbols in that scene.

With this in mind, I combed through the entire six episodes of Acts 1 & 2, looking for any other green hourglasses. I didn't find them anywhere else. To be fair, I combed through the season pretty quickly, so I may have missed them. If I did, please point them out to me! But if I'm right that this is the only place we see them, that's VERY WEIRD and VERY INTENTIONAL.

Someone in a different analysis video also pointed out that Isha has some oddly fancy aspects to her outfit.

This could definitely be nothing, but something about that pattern on her vest seems out of place. Almost more like something you'd seen in Piltover than in Zaun.

My theory is that Isha was sent to this point in time by Ekko and we're going to see what led up to this moment in Act 3. Isha might be dead (I'm still sobbing about it), but we're going to learn more about her.

Will she stay dead? Honestly yeah, I think so.

I think that the version of events we're seeing is the version where time has already been changed, and I'm going to get into that more later.

Pt 2: The Letter

Actually I lied above about not finding any other green hourglasses in season 2. I found one more, in the scene where Jinx is reading Vander's letter to Silco in S2E5.

Note that this ISN'T the Firelights symbol. But it is definitely a green hourglass. Also note the gear in the center, which has been a recurring symbol this season that seems to have something to do with time.

This has to mean something, right? But I don't know what.

Pt 3: Gears-As-Clocks

There is one really notable instance of this. I really wish I had a GIF of this scene, but I don't know how to make GIFs and I don't feel like learning just for this, but here's a sequence of screenshots that hopefully show you what I mean.

Jinx turns clockwise, which transitions into the gear on Jayce's hammer also turning clockwise. Like a clock. The gear is a clock. Going forward in time.

And what shot do we get immediately after this?

Jayce is going forward in time.

I suspect there might be other instances of gears turning clockwise to symbolize a clock, but I've already spent too long on this post so if anyone finds another example, please share. Still, even if this is the only instance, it recontextualizes all gears in this season to be time-related.

Pt 4: Fortune Cookie

I kept wondering why Jinx calls Viktor a fortune cookie. I do think there are multiple parts to this and I'm missing some of it. Something about a cookie being sweet and Viktor being sweet? I dunno, I'm missing part of what this comparison means.

HOWEVER. Why a FORTUNE cookie, and not just any cookie?

Fortune cookies predict the future, but in silly, little ways that don't really mean anything. Maybe Viktor can see the future, but only glimpses. Tiny things that don't actually allow him to do anything about it.

Fortune cookies also hide their fortune inside a bland, mildly sweet cookie, and you have to break the cookie to get the fortune out...

OKAY WAIT I was gonna say I don't know what that means, but uh... you have to break the cookie to get the fortune.

You have to break Viktor to find the future.

Pt 5: Fate

I've rewatched Viktor's scenes several times, and I kept wondering why Viktor asks Singed whether he believes in fate. It seems to come out of nowhere.

My theory at this point in that Viktor knows something is manipulating events, but he can't see specifics. He just knows there is some invisible force guiding events, and maybe, he's wondering if Singed knows about it.

Pt 6: Singed's Plan

What is Singed's plan in Act 2?

He goes to the undercity rally and clearly wants to be arrested. He comes prepared with a knife and slits his hand, so he will leave a blood trail. He wants to be taken to prison, and he wants Warwick to follow him there.

When we see Singed in the prison, in the scene where Jinx finds Isha, he has the door to his cell partially open.

He could have left before that, but he wants to be there. Then the lights start flickering and he closes the door again, to protect him from Warwick.

When Caitlyn walks through the prison in S2E5, he's STILL THERE. The door is unlocked. He could have left after Warwick did. But he stayed.

He stays so he can talk to Ambessa. When Ambessa comes to see him alone in prison, the first thing he says is "I've been expecting you."

He wanted to show Ambessa what he was capable of (Warwick) so that Ambessa would hire him. And that's exactly what she does.

And what does he do? He convinces Ambessa they can use Warwick, and then tracks Warwick to Viktor's commune.

Now, there are some things worth mentioning. First, Singed likely didn't expect Jinx to be at the prison, and didn't expect Jinx to awaken Vander within Warwick. However, Jinx's presence didn't disrupt his plan to get Ambessa's attention. His plan remained intact.

Second, he wouldn't have had any way of predicting that Warwick would up in Victor's commune, but I suspect this is a happy coincidence for him. I'm guessing he wanted to use Ambessa to recapture Warwick, and then was planning to convince her that Viktor would also be useful.

We know from the scene early on in S2E4 where Ambessa is conducting hextec experiements that she wished she had captured the "scientists" aka Jayce and Viktor. Singed likely knew about Viktor's commune, just because word about it had been spreading around Zaun, and even to Piltover (Lest mentions Viktor to Salo), and we know Singed suspected that the Herald was Viktor.

Ambessa would have wanted to invade the commune to capture Viktor, even if Warwick hadn't been there.

But, it turns out, he is, so that allows Singed and Ambessa to capture two experimental subjects with one invasion. Singed wants to get in there, capture both Warwick and Viktor, and combine them into a perfect being. This is his ultimate goal on the path to "curing death".

Which leads us to my final topic.

Pt 7: Jayce

What is the thing no one expects in Act 2?

Jayce killing Viktor. This was not a part of Singed's plan. Jayce kills Viktor before Singed can get to him, and THAT is why killing Viktor was necessary.

So, I have a couple of theories of where things go from here regarding Viktor.

Option 1: While this didn't prevent Singed from getting ahold of Viktor, it did damage Viktor in some way that prevents him from being used the way Singed intended. Whatever Singed would have done with Viktor is now impossible, and the future isn't as bad as the one Jayce saw.

Option 2: Viktor is actually, fully dead, and the hints of him we see in the Act 3 preview are actually scenes from the future that Jayce saw and has now prevented. Viktor could still come back in some way in the main timeline, but... I honestly do think there's a chance that he's actually just dead, and we'll only see alternate timeline versions of him in Act 3.

Okay, I think that's everything. Sorry to end on a depressing note but uh... Arcane, right? It's good. It's really good.

I do hope Viktor isn't dead though, even if he comes back even more wrong than before.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.171 Happy birthday to ya

When it got closer to party time, Sophia and I moved the couch to the backyard for more seating options. Our parties always end up fragmented with some sims eating in the house and others on the patio. My goal is to keep everyone together, so hopefully this will help. We also moved the picnic blanket and put the portable crib outside to accommodate the little ones. Because we're friendly again, I invited Yasmine and her girls, but she declined. She doesn't know the other guests and didn't want anyone asking questions about Stacey. I completely understood but feel bad for her. This spellcaster business has really trapped her and the girls in their home.

Apart from my baby aging up, I'm most excited about having Dub and his family in our home for the first time. Between the deaths and parenthood, it's been super hard for us to connect lately. I guess I was naïve enough to believe it would be easier being in the same city, but life keeps proving it doesn't matter where we are. Life is going to life, and that's that. I suppose I'll have to be more intentional about hanging with him too.

"You got it smelling good out here, bro," a voice says from behind me.

That Henford accent is unmistakable, and I was so glad to hear it. I turned around and embraced him.

"Wassup, man! Did you find us okay? Welcome! Finally!"

"Right? Took you long enough!"

"Don't even play, man. You know how life is sometimes."

"Sure do. This house is nice! And the view!"

"Thanks. If you're able to stick around later, I'll give you the tour. Hey, where's Maia? Is she coming?"

"Yeah, she's running a little late. She's just finishing up a project for a client."

"Ahhh. See? San Sequoia has been good to you already. I'm glad her business is picking up."

There's no way Dub showed up alone, so I looked around for Tambara, knowing she couldn't be too far behind. I spotted her toddling across the yard, trying her best to catch up with her daddy.

"She's getting to be extremely independent these days," Dub said when he realized I was watching her. "She won't even let us pick her up anymore. I don't mind that so much, but waiting for her really slows me down."

"She'll get faster," I said, thinking about Desiree's determination. "Just give her time."

Tami and Desi look nothing alike, but I see glimpses of the immediate future in her proud face and wobbly gait. I want Desi to grow up and change the world, but I can't part with my little girl. At the same time, I'm anxious to see her continue to grow. I love watching her smash these milestones like the boss baby she is. Ugh. Fatherhood is just a melting pot of contradictions. How can I be happy and sad, proud and scared at the same time?

Tami finally made her way over to us, so I waved.

"Hey there! Do you remember me? I'm Luca. That's a pretty dress."

Her face lit up, and I knew it didn't matter if she remembered me or not. I was currently her new bestie. Flattery works at all ages, hee hee.

"What do you say when someone gives you a compliment?" Dub asked.

"I know," she shouted.

Me and Dub had a good laugh. She's so precocious, and I love it. Kids really do say the darndest things, and I can't wait to hear what Desi will have to say. Hopefully that's not a be careful what you wish for situation, heh.

"That's right, Tam," I said. "You better know it."

"How are you holding up?" Dub asked, wiping the smile off my face.

"I'm good. As good as I can be, rather. It gets a little better every day."

"I'm glad to hear it. I can't even think about what that's going to be like."

"It might sound morbid, but you should start thinking about it, man. It's the shock that's hard to get over."

"You play dollies with me," Tambara shouts.

That was probably supposed to be a question, but she's too excited about her new, big friend and it's too cute.

"Oh, no," Dub says to me. "You start that and she'll never let you go."

She's adorable, looking just like both of them. I hope she and Desi will like each other. It'll be a shame to have them fighting or snubbing each other when we hang out.

"You can play with Desiree later, okay?" he says.

"Speaking of... We should probably get this show on the road soon. Let me finish these ribs."

(makeovers and family photos below!)

Dub and fam by @mysimsloveaffair

[gwenllian-in-the-abbey]

i think Helaena can be autistic but also a happy and joyful girl , autism ≠ depression. the way the portrayed the only neurodivergent character on screen as unstable, shunned depressed, and with no importance to the plot feel very ableist and weird , but then they're the ones who made the guy with a foot disability a feet fetishist 🫠

Hi OP, finally answering this because the trailer dropped and still the only Helaena shots we have are from her Jaehaerys' funeral. There is also one still photo of her. If you haven't seen it, here she is, apparently sewing the funeral shroud for her little boy:

So it seems like season 2 is going to continue on this trajectory for Helaena as a character who exists in order to suffer beautifully.

Don't get me wrong. I am glad that the show is going to wring the full emotional effect from Blood and Cheese, not just shock value. The audience will feel the real horror of a six year old child brutally murdered in his own home and the psychological torment of Helaena. It should be terrible, it should be devastating, and I hope they do not pull any punches.

What's disappointing about how the show has handled Helaena is that they didn't really put any effort into building up her character before her tragedy. It's all well and good that she likes bugs and she's touch averse, but what are her opinions? Who is she closest to? How did she react to becoming a mother so young? To what extent does she understand her visions? What does she value? She can be happy and cheerful, or she can be frustrated and angry, and hell, she can be depressed too, but I need to know why. It's telling that I can describe the basic internal motivations for each of the male children, including Luke who was a glorified plot device, but I cannot for Helaena. Aegon wants to feel loved, Jace wants to prove he's as worthy as any trueborn heir, Aemond wants what his brother has, Luke wants to be free from his family's expectations. Helaena? Fuck if I know. I guess she wants not to die horribly.

The ableism is an issue. F&B is full of women who were deemed "simple" -- Gael, Daella, Jaehaera-- without being given much else to define them, and HotD adds another (there's something, I think, to the way the "simple" Targaryens are always women and how disability kind of used as a way to remove them from the narrative and shunt them aside, often tragically). And while it's great to see an autistic person represented on screen, the show consistently has an issue with treating representation as characterization. "Autistic girl who likes bugs" is not a personality. Autistic people, (even those with horrifying prophesies I assume), do have hopes and dreams and feelings about things. The one peek we get into Helaena's life is at the in episode 8 when she roasts Aegon and even that scene is open to interpretation (and gets taken wildly out of context). Now, I can read a lot into the actor performances, but ultimately, lines that could have given a glimpse Helaena personality were cut. It's as if they're afraid that if they give her an opinion on anything she would lose that (frankly kind of infantilizing) "pure cinnamon roll too good for this world" "i would die for her" sympathy from people who are not inclined to be sympathetic for her family as a whole.

(And anon, you're right about Larys. And let me say, turning Larys' clubfoot into the punchline of an OnlyFeet joke also does not inspire confidence that they'll handle Aegon II's eventual disability with any sensitivity either, especially when Mushroom's accounts of his last few months are incredibly mean spirited. We need to start that discourse now so they get the memo).

Sadly, I don't think the show really has any intention of course correcting with Helaena in season 2. I imagine at most we'll have her try to warn Aegon and/or Aemond about Blood & Cheese but they won't understand her warning, and then this will be a vehicle to further their guilt and grief. And while we do need to see Aegon's guilt and his grief, I also want to know if Helaena blames herself, if she wishes they'd run away when they had the chance, if she thinks Aegon could have done something, if she is angry at Aemond for killing Luke, if she wants revenge. I do think, with the public funeral for Jaehaerys, they are going to show that the smallfolk are fond of Helaena, and hopefully that will be expanded upon this season and in season 3 because her death is the catalyst for the revolt that sees Rhaenyra driven from the city, and we should understand why her death has such an impact before she actually dies.

[not-your-bro]

things i didn't like about the until dawn remake prologue (in no particular order)

the note change

the original note to hannah is overtly sexual - "you look so damn hot in that shirt, but i bet you're even hotter out of it." the new one is a substantial tone change - "it's been fun hanging out with you... no one gets me like you do. come find me later." the vibe is shifting from "i want to hook up with you" to "i might want to confess my feelings to you," and hannah basically says as much in her new diary entry: "is it too much to hope that he'll confess his feelings about me?" but the prologue does NOT change hannah taking her shirt off asap, which now feels ridiculous. there's no reason for her to do that when the note is so low-key. we're feeding the "hannah reacts too strongly" people and i'm not into it.

the prank setup montage

my initial guess with the note change was that they wanted to make the prank seem more like a bad, insensitive joke that escalates too quickly, rather than a group of people intending to film someone taking their clothes off (which is absolutely the vibe of the original). but if that was the intent, it's completely undercut by this prolonged prank setup. it literally has the energy of people prepping for a cool heist or something. pop song bopping in the background, dramatic shots as everyone gets into position. they're all relishing in it, particularly emily, whose mocap actor gives her some evil fucking gestures and expressions. all of this totally contrasts the new note and makes everyone look seriously diabolical.

sam's passivity

while i definitely joked about how sam couldn't seem to find hannah in the original, man, at least she tried! she voiced her concern and then immediately acted on it - a very sam move, imo. in the remake, the extra padding sees her sitting in silence for too long. and even after everyone leaves her on her own, she STILL just sits there and gives this irritated eye-roll - like she's annoyed with them, but not particularly concerned for hannah. and then her searching for hannah is cut. like. homegirl does not care, apparently! imo these changes are so out of character for sam, and i can't figure why they did this. is it to ""answer"" the question of why josh targets sam - by making her more culpable now? idk, but none of it works for me.

beth's dialogue makes less sense

in the original, she glimpsed flamethrower guy, made her "did you see that?" comment, then said "josh?", THEN we see that josh is passed out.

now the order of dialogue is nonsensical. she doesn't even see flamethrower guy, first of all - we the audience get a glimpse of him while she's taking out the trash, and there's a fake-out where you think she saw him, too. but what she actually sees is a deer. so she notices nothing amiss, goes inside, sees josh passed out, and moves him to the couch. then, later, she can go to the window, see NOTHING but snow falling off a branch...and say her usual, "did you see that? i thought dad said it'd just be us this weekend." HUH? GIRL? IT WAS NOTHING? and then she still goes "josh??" as though she didn't just haul his ass to the couch without him waking up. like, he is CONKED out and you know this. why are you saying his name like you're surprised he isn't answering you?

i don't mean to nitpick, but to demonstrate that they should've been more careful about how they changed the prologue, given they couldn't change the dialogue. and speaking of that...

the pacing

i understand that they couldn't add new dialogue because of logistical or budgetary reasons or both, but extending the prologue without being able to add dialogue leads to long stretches where the characters are noticeably not talking. it's awkward to watch, despite the music trying to cover for it, and it makes the pacing really uneven.

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in general, i appreciate the desire to add a little extra for the existing fanbase, but if ballistic moon had their hands tied and couldn't do it properly, i kind of wish they hadn't done it at all, especially because i think they're doing more harm than good here. i love hannah and beth and it's nice to just see them for a bit longer, but it comes at a cost, and at the end of the day i much prefer the original prologue.

[ayaitch]

One of the things in the Horizon games that is a little tiresome to me is about all these Carja "good ones". Every time we meet a Carja (except for Nil, who is a whole other topic...), the narrative goes to lengths to assure us, the audience, that we should care about this Carja because they were "one of the good ones" during the Red Raids. This Carja wanted to stop things. This Carja opposed the Red Raids and senseless slaughter. This Carja always questioned things and strove to stop it all.

So that's great and all, and I appreciate having "good ones" right off the bat during awful, horrible times in a culture's history, but it's not very challenging. Show me why I should care about one of the "bad ones". Or someone who thought they were doing well by their culture, people, family, only to finally glimpse the big picture and realize how wrong they were and then try to change. Someone who snaps out of it, elbow-deep in blood (metaphrically?), and realizes something is off, thinks, 'Wtf am I doing, this isn't helping anyone.'

Even Avad, who usurped his bloodthirsty, tyrant father (and killed him, I don't want that to be taken away from Avad!) should have, at least up until a certain point, believed what his father was doing was right. It's how he was raised. It was the only lens by which he saw the world, especially considering the literal pillar upon which the Carja royal family resided. He had to be drinking from the same cup as his father (again, metaphorically) and so why wouldn't he believe up to a time, that they were doing what was right by their religion/culture. At some point, he had a Come-to-the-Sun moment (so to speak) and realized his father was a terrible, murdering person and worked against that, but what was that moment? He was already plotting against his father by the time he meets Ursa and helps her escape (if I recall correctly...).

Talanah's father and brother, prestigious and noble members of the Hunter's Lodge in Meridian, should have, at least at the beginning, been totally behind their Sun-King, who made it a point to justify more and more terrible things by claiming it for the best, that their people needed protection from this machine threat and degrading biosphere. I like the way the narrative handled them, but we were still presented with the idea that they were "good from the start."

Fashav too. "One of the good ones", who marched with the Red Raiders hoping to "mitigate" their atrocities. Which he failed at so why is he still considered a good one? Because intentions? There's a reason the adage is "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." (Don't get me wrong, I love Fashav, and wanted him to retire in comfort and accomplished lasting peace with laurels on his arms. He's such a compelling character as far as I'm concerned.)

Every Carja we meet that the narrative wants us to care about had figured out that the Mad Sun-King was awful and terrible before their hands got truly dirty, and were just trying to do their best from the inside to make change without creating waves and getting themselves executed (except Talanah's family, good on them).

So. I guess what I'm looking for in Horizon is an actual bad guy of the Carja who comes around before the end of the Red Raids. Someone too deep to see that they were wrong at first, but as soon as they did, made the needed change, and then did their very best to actively sabotage and undermine authority in every possible way. It's not that I don't like the Carja we meet in the game, it's just boring that they're always "one of the good ones" so we should care about what happens to them, instead of just having Aloy murder them on sight. Someone who did some things in the name of an unworthy institution and is now trying to come back from it and do the right thing.

Thinking about all this makes me wish we could have taken down those Shadow Carja in the Daunt at the beginning of HFW, because they're still nasty and awful (but still somehow good and peaceful types?????), but Aloy and Petra are all, 'aw, poor refugees...'. Like.... Pardon me? Weren't they were 100% supportive of the murdering, crazy Sun-King who tore apart both of their tribes and are anti-Avad who wants peace with everyone. What the hell is with that?

[cletimz]

| Glimpses of Reality | Chapter 2

Stilgar Ben Fifrawi x OC Fem

Wc: 1834

Paul Atreides was startled a little bit when he heard a familiar voice enter the training room in which he was right now.

“I thought you were going to Arrakis with Duncan” Mileena mentioned as she looked at the room and realized the strong smell of sweat in there “He didn’t want me to go with him, I even told him about a dream I had about this visit to Arrakis and ending with his dead” He replied to her as he kept cleaning the swords used while training with Gurney “Probably though it was a silly dream. You made good by telling him about it. It was up to him to decide what to do next” She sighed at the end and inspected the arms held on display in the walls

“Don't worry, Paul. In a blink, we would be in Arrakis, and you will be reunited with your great love, Duncan '' She added with a smile on her face trying to enlighten the mood of her friend as she knows how much he appreciates him. Mileena always found it funny how Paul would try to follow Duncan everywhere, even as kids he would be the same. “I'm not in the mood for silly jokes, Mileena. You better than anyone should comprehend how these dreams or visions, whatever they are, affect” The future duke responded as he went to stand next to her and accommodate the swords he was cleaning on their respective place “I'm sorry, Paul. You seriously do not need to worry about him. He's a great warrior. Dreams are only dreams. We can make assumptions about them and we would never know if we are crossing the line of reality or fiction until the exact situation happens” She looked him in the eyes and noticed the lost look in them. “We need to focus on the real dangers we are facing. Do you not suspect anything about the Harkonnens and their passive response at the house Atreides taking over Arrakis?”

He nodded as he listened to her question “Gurney was telling me about them. They are wicked. I am not sure what they are planning but the Emperor asked us to go to Arrakis so he is on our side”

“Try not to be too confident about that, Paul. You could never know the real intentions behind a political move” Mileena commented as they moved to the door to leave the room “You sound like one of those old men advising my father. Maybe you should be the future Duke, or may I say, duchess' ' They both laugh at the boy’s reply “The Bene Gesserit would have my head for that' ' The girl commented as they made their way to have dinner.

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Mileena was in her bed reading a book about the Fremen. She admired their way of adapting to the environment they lived in, not only physically, but psychologically. The girl knew about the resistance from them to the Emperor as every man ruling Arrakis only saw the place as a gold mine to be exploited. She wished them the best for their stay at Arrakis. Some gut feeling told her it was not going to be a long one.

When she was about to close her eyes, someone entered her room. It was Jessica. “Did anything happen? Are you fine?” The girl questioned as she saw the nervous look Jessica “The Reverend's mother is here and she wishes to see you” Mileena could not help to freeze for a minute at the mention of the Reverend's mother in the Atreides palace “Get ready quickly. She is going to talk with Paul first and then with you” The older Benne Gessarit commented as she left her room to wake up her son.

The girl was intrigued by the sudden interest of the Reverend's mother to talk with her. The last time they had a meeting was when she was 15 years old and Mileena found the courage to ask her about her mother and the frequent dreams she had about Arrakis. She didn't mention the man in her dreams as something told her it would bother the Bene Gesserit. The Reverend's mother told her that her mother was no useful individual in her growing up. She was no Bene Gesserit. She could not teach her in The Way. Mileena wanted to argue that idea and mention that every child needs its mother, but she knew better, so she did not question any further.

She was waiting in the hall when she saw Paul leaving the room and Jessica Atreides sighed with her head to indicate that it was her time to go inside. Mileena went inside and court to the Reverend Mother “Come” The older Bene Gesserit used the voice on her and her body and mind followed the instruction. “You have grown, what are you eighteen? Nineteen? Save me the unnecessary questions, young girl” Mileena nodded and responded in a nervous tone “I am eighteen, Reverend Mother. This is my last year of training to become part of the Bene Gesserit” The older woman nodded at her statement “That is correct and that is the reason I asked to meet you tonight. Your training with Jessica is soon to be finished. You would become one of us and you will accomplish your duties”

The woman continued examining her “Jessica Atreides was supposed to have a girl who would, in the future, give birth to the daughter of Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen” Mileena was shocked at the revelation made to her “I did not know any about that. Jessica never told me” This was something very usual from Jessica Atreides. She would never share personal information with Mileena. “Of course she wouldn't, she was busy raising her son into our teaching method. She believes he is the Kwisatz Haderach. However, I am not here to talk about Jessica and her delusions. As I mentioned, she was supposed to have a girl who would fulfill the duty of breeding a daughter of Feyd-Rautha”

The girl did not like where this conversation was leading. The Reverend Mother continued talking “She didn't have a daughter and now we need someone to fulfill the duty of this absence” Mileena knew what the Reverend Mother was about to ask her, correction, demand her “You will marry Feyd-Rautha and bear a daughter from him. You are going to stay a few weeks in Arrakis until we arrange your arrival to Giedi Prime” The girl was about to protest when the older Bene Gesserit used the voice on her once again “Leave the room”

When she was outside, she could not believe what had just happened. She was furious. She went to her room and started crying as much as she could. She would never find peace under the hands of the Bene Gesserit.

————

The next day they were leaving for Arrakis. Mileena tried to ask Jessica if she knew anything about what the future held for her, but she already knew the answer. She knew everything was planned from the beginning. That is why Jessica Atreides could not refuse to train her as she was in no position to decline because she decided to have a son. The only thing Mileena could do was to enjoy her last days with the people she had grown around.

“What's gotten into your mind? You look defeated” Paul asked her as she noticed the change in her behavior since the meeting with the Reverend Mother “Nothing to worry about. I just want to finally land in Arrakis. I don't like flying” The boy nodded “We will land in a few minutes” and they did. As soon as they went outside of the ship, Mileena noticed the influence of the Bene Gesserit in the people of Arrakis as they were chanting for Paul Atreides as they were told to believe he was the mesias.

As the first days of their first week in Arrakis passed, the Duke’s heir was almost killed. The girl believed it was someone from inside who tried to do that but quickly forgot that as Paul told her they were going to have a meeting with the Fremen leader whom Duncan had met during his mission. She knew how important this was, if house Atreides were on good terms with the Fremen, it was possible they would have a good future in Arrakis.

These days she noticed she stopped having those dreams about Arrakis and the mysterious dream. She thought if she ever stopped having those dreams she would feel like a charge had been taken away from her, but it was the contrary, Mileena missed the caressing and small moments of peace she would feel in her dreams. Her mind keeps wandering about that as she walks through the halls of their new home.

This day was the one arranged for the meeting with Liet-Kynes to check the production equipment left by the Harkonnens. It was obvious they were trying to sabotage House Atreides. Right now the Duke was in a meeting with the Fremen leader. She wishes to meet him and ask him about their people. However, she knew he would probably show disgust for house Atreides and would never answer her questions. However, this might change depending on the outcome of the meeting between him and the Duke.

She kept walking with an absent-minded mind trying to avoid thinking as every worry about her future would fill her head and she would rather avoid that. She was looking at her feet while doing so until she jumped into someone. “I apologize I was not looking where I was going,” She said as she noticed who was the person she had bumped into.

She immediately recognized the clothes as the traditional Fremen vestment; she figured he was the Fremen's leader of the meeting. He mumbled something in another language before he responded “No need to worry. Watch your steps, young lady” He said to her as he moved past and continued his way to leave the place “Wait a minute. You are the Fremen leader, right? Duncan told us about you. I am Mileena, Mileena Almad” she offered her hand to him to shake them “Yes, I am. My name is Stilgar. We have just finished the meeting, your Duke seems to have good intentions”

He took her hand in hers and shook it. As soon as he accepted her salute, Mileena felt a warm feeling of comfort go through her body. She immediately recognized them as the ones she used to feel in her dreams when the mysterious man would caress her. The girl stood frozen in her place and could not say a word. She missed that feeling “I need to leave. I am needed somewhere else. Take care of yourself, Mileena” She watched him go and she was fighting the urge to follow him. She found peace in her mind for less than a second and it was still enough for her.

there are probably many mistakes but I just want to post this chapter and go to sleep, chauuu los tkm💋🧟