#we could even keep all the Mars stuff
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herrscherofmagic · 1 year ago
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Ngl, I kinda wish Mihoyo made Sora the protagonist for Part 2, instead of introducing a totally new cast...
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Sora would've been such a good choice because she'd be a perfect bridge between these two eras of Honkai 3rd! Old enough to remember a world with Honkai, but young enough to experience a world without Honkai.
Sora even has a connection with the original protagonists, but she's also independent enough that the story can move forward with the OG cast moving into a support role while Sora & the Valks of her generation step up and take their place.
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Sora was orphaned by Honkai so her life has already been shaped by it, yet she's also growing up in a post-Honkai world and should be at the age of a typical Valkyrie by the time the Sky People arrive. We learned that Lyle was part of the Roost so she already has a connection in that way, and Lyle even mentions her in APHO 2. Plus Sora has a stigma so she already has a natural source of power and a lot of potential for growth. Plus there's Mark 2!!
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We even got to see Sora again in Part 1.5, right at the start of the Salt Snow Holy City arc. I was thinking "oh wow, is Mihoyo setting up Sora to be the protagonist for Part 2?? that'd be perfect!" but no. i was mistaken :/
I'm still willing to give Part 2 of HI3rd a chance, but now I'm kinda disappointed we didn't get Sora as the next protagonist :(
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moonchild033 · 4 months ago
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Astro Observations -4💃
Here we go with part-4!!! Every time I make an observation post, I get so excited lol 😭🤩
(These observations are based on the whole sign system, sidereal charts and all obs are subject to change with other aspects in the chart, so don't conclude anything with a single placement) ❤
Virgo venus- Possibilities of your valuable items/luxury products getting stolen OR you might be prone to losing it carelessly. In the case of jewelry, keep silver and diamond ornaments safely. Ur spouse can have high expectations on you and never gets easily satisfied. High standards spouse lol 😶❤
4H lord in 2H- Could've faced many health issues till the age of 10 or around that age.🤒
Stellium in 3/6/10/11 houses- They have a very competitive mindset, an urge to be first in everything, tendency to stress themselves out bcoz of their own set standards, they might feel like a failure even if they get second place, FIRST is the ONLY WIN 🤯❤
Having more than 3 planets in rahu/ketu ruled stars- Prone to be victims of evil eyes and black magic procedures. 🤐
Virgo ascendant - You could be the one doing all the work but the credits will be stolen by colleagues or seniors more often.😔❤
Mercury in retrograde - These people could have out of the box or a different type of brilliance but they're usually slow and find it difficult to sustain in a conventional educational system.👍❤
Planets in parivartana (Mutual Exchange of houses)- The retrograde, debilitation or affliction of the planets in parivartana gets cancelled because it will attain an almost exalted position.😌❤
Taurus ascendant - They have the innate destiny to sacrifice a lot for their family, especially for siblings and their mother could be the one piling them up with responsibilities.😐❤
Alone Jupiter without being aspected by benefic planets- Potential to damage the house themes where Jupiter is present. This can be rectified if moon/mars/sun/ketu is present in kendra houses when counted from Jupiter's position.💛
Rahu/Ketu/Saturn in Cancer especially in Man's chart- Faces many disheartening stuff from females in their life. Their trust will be broken and prone to be played by female friendships, even by girlfriend, colleagues etc. Most females in their life hide ulterior motives even if they're too good in front of their face.🤧❤
Rahu/Ketu/Saturn in Libra especially in Woman's chart- Prone to get Toxic female friendships who can manipulate their mind and give wrong advice, ultimately poisoning your thinking. Even though Saturn is exalted in Libra, this is one of the downsides you might face and have to carefully choose & overcome.😬❤
Air risings - If we are talking about difficult childhood placements in general without much analysis, air risings would've faced many struggles in childhood than other risings imo.😧
5H/10H lord in Rahu/Ketu ruled stars- You could get ancestral karma from dad's side in case of rahu ruled star and from mom's side in case of ketu ruled star. You might feel extreme emotions or inexplicable connection with that particular side's dead ancestors.💯
Saturn in conjunction with Rahu/Ketu OR Saturn in Rahu/Ketu ruled stars- Anything bad you do will revert back immediately or with the same timing (ex. If u stole credits of a colleague and that person worked for that project for 3 months, in near future you would've worked the EXACT three months and someone else will get credits for that). The 'karma' aspect works really well in this placement and you will have a conscious realization phase too.🙊
Mars-Saturn conjunction especially in Capricorn - Nervousness, Anxiety disorders can be a common occurrence to this person. They could have a racing heart, excessive sweat, cold hands, leg shaking, trembling hands, stuttering and other accompanied symptoms of anxiety even for the tiniest task. They should work on overcoming getting nervous over everything.😰🤗
Let's Learn and Grow Together!💋💅
With Love -Yashi ❤⚡
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Masterlist 💖
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fumifooms · 8 months ago
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I don’t like minimizing the importance and gravity of Laios and Toshiro’s fight into just being a childish squabble, even if to a degree it is framed that way, because to both of them it has a lot of personal significance and emotional weight and runs very deep to their characters… The fight isn’t nothing it’s a LOT, they made up but it’s not something easy to express and to get over for either of them which makes it all the more meaningful! I’m on both sides but there very much are sides, there’s no "they’re both having a ball, Toshiro and Laios hand in hand yay" side to the fight, that comes after
The fight with Toshiro WAS very scary to Laios, almost existentially so, but it’s moreso the "I thought I’d made a friend!!" bit and my god. My god actually
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Like it’s not "just" about oh his friend liking him less than he thought, THAT IS SO MUCH. It’s a bond he thought he had being a lie it’s all the time and moments spent together either being a lie from his perspective or marred now looking back. It’s not only being upset at Toshiro for lying but upset at himself that he’s so easy to fool, it’s being upset that there’s something so wrong with you that you can’t even tell if your "close buddy" even actually likes you or not, it’s like. Holding my head. He can’t trust his own vision of events that happened do you see. There’s always this film of distrust that it could be a lie that should be there when he interacts with people there’s always this sense of cloak and dagger to expect backstabs out of nowhere because you CAN’T see it coming you CAN’T you CAN’T there’s something about you which makes it impossible so you CAN’T-
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He’s so scared of not being able to read people. He knows it’s a weak spot he has, he’s always known. All of these bits are centered around social expectations and betrayals, the assumption that he doesn’t belong either in society or with other humans.
And Laios’ level of awareness is actually sort of complex to analyze, but it’s there, there’s how out of him and Falin he was the one sensitive to the ~aura of hatred~ he felt from the townspeople, there’s of course his nightmares whispering to him about the mocking looks, and how yeah actually he realizes that his gold stripper coworker was taking advantage of him. There’s of course the Winged Lion speech about his trauma and how he fundamentally mistrusts/dislikes humans to some deep seated degree, this distrust that he still keeps under control always. There’s how pre-canon he often wanted to suggest eating monsters but never worked up the courage to bring it up with the others. There’s how he gets across as stoic when he isn’t being enthusiastic…… We don’t know how aware and wary he is exactly in the moment but we do know he has some anxiety around social stuff, and looking back he does notice and aughh augh, the sense you have to hide yourself to not get hurt and be on your guard and shit and.
When you don’t know what to look out for and when to look out for it, the general ‘common sense’ of not always trusting people or noticing when someone’s messing with you becomes hypervigilance in social settings
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"Man they really know what you hate huh." Being socially unaware literally plagues him, he knows, he knows it so well.
It’s so quick that it’s almost hard to digest how literal and blatant Laios summoning his monster to crush all the people who’ve hurt him is. His literal go-to coping mechanism for comfort in his literal monster-induced emotionally intense nightmares, saving him by taking away the upsetting element (the humans)
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"Monsters are his coping fantasy, where they can whisk him away from humanity, all the hurt it’s caused him and its arbitrary rules" with the subtlety of a brick. Monsters are his comfort safe zone "because they kill humans" yes but no it’s because he pits them as the guardians against humans who to him are in the role of the agressors. To him they represent freedom from the shackles of what it means to be part of humanity, a fundamentally social species
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multi-kpop-fanfics · 1 year ago
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Old Money, Bratty Honey
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pairing: bodyguard!Wonwoo x heiress!reader x bodyguard!Vernon
genre: smut - minors dni.
warnings: car sex (a limo specifically), public sex (the windows are tinted but still), mean dom!wonwoo, switch!vernon, brat!reader, sir kink, edging, hair pulling, blowjobs, facefucking, degradation, masturbation, voyeurism, cum swallowing, reader is rich and spoiled (yk how the rest goes)
requested by @onlymingyus
word count: 1.7k
summary: being born in money gives you the chance to try pretty much everything in the world - that includes fucking your two hot bodyguards in your dad's limousine.
Author's note: hello <3 this fic was requested by beloved mars - the unesco forum pics did a LOT of damage
tagging: @gyuwoncheol @wonwussy bcs they asked to suffer so here we are
©multi-kpop-fanfics, 2023. No reposting allowed. No translations allowed without permission.
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“Do you remember your speech?”
“Tch, of course I do.” You roll your eyes. “I wrote it myself, remember?”
“I know you did. Just wanted to check whether your brain cells are still active.” Wonwoo smirks.
“Unlucky for you, they are very much intact and in better shape than yours.” You bite back.
“Is there any time of any day where the two of you don’t argue?” Vernon groans from behind you. “Can we just…enjoy the little time we have left until we arrive at the venue?”
“Mmm, of course we can, Nonie.” You turn your attention to your other bodyguard. “He’s never fun, either way. But you are way more fun, right?” You make yourself comfortable in his lap, your manicured hands smoothing over his chest.
“Anything for you, honey. You know me.” Vernon smirks and leans in the crevice of your neck, lips and tongue gliding over your skin.
Wonwoo sighs in defeat and averts his eyes from the unfolding scene, trying to ignore it. 
If it wasn’t for the hefty salary that gets deposited every month in his bank account, he wouldn’t even be here. He would rather be walking at a dingy bar, rather than have to babysit a rich brat like you. 
And the worst thing of all? You’re smart and hot as fuck - to the point where he wants to stuff your mouth full of his dick and make you cry.
You’re aware of how uptight and cold Wonwoo is towards you and you can’t really blame him for his attitude - being head of security under your dad basically requires that attitude. Which makes messing around with him even more fun for you.
Vernon, on the other hand, is your assigned personal bodyguard and would fold in half for you, if you asked him to. One bat of your eyelashes is enough to make him cave to any request of yours, thus giving you the perfect cover for your night escapades.
But of course, he always gets rewarded for his secrecy and faith to you - in the form of letting him fuck you dumb more than often.
This is one of the occasions where you want to mess around with both of them at the same time.
You throw the fabric of your gown backwards to uncover your legs and give yourself enough space to grind your clothed pussy over Vernon’s slacks. 
“Careful with your gown, honey.” He reminds you.
“It’s just fabric, I could have tens of that.” You grin towards him.
“How rich and bratty, coming from you.” Wonwoo comments with a venomous tone.
“Yeah, that’s because I am rich, bratty, pretty and smart and you want to fuck me so bad.” You reply boldly.
He slides next to Vernon and grips your jaw with his right hand, keeping it steady directly in front of his face.
“You’re right, little bitch. I want to fuck the brat out of you, to the point you’re crying and begging me to stop.” His voice feels deeper and colder than the ocean, his eyes burning holes in your skull through his horn-rimmed glasses.
You almost hate how hot and fuckable Wonwoo looks today - but you’ve always wanted to know what’s hidden under his professional attire.
“I would like to see you try, you fucking nerd. I bet you’re still a virgin-”
He cuts you off by dragging you off Vernon’s lap and pushes you down on your knees, between his thighs.
“Dude, what the hell!” Vernon glares at the older man.
“Shut the fuck up, Vernon. You have gotten plenty of time with her since you got your job. Now sit back and watch.” Wonwoo orders him as he unbuttons his pants and lets his cock spring free.
Your eyes widen at the size and it makes your mouth fill with saliva and your pussy dampens your Victoria’s Secret panties.
“Tell me, Vernon - Does the pretty brat over here like to suck dick?” Wonwoo asks with a dangerous glint in his eyes as he runs his fist over his shaft.
“Y-Yeah, she does.” The younger man stutters.
“Does she swallow?”
“Yes, she does.”
“Yes what, Vernon?”
“Yes s-sir.”
“Hm, at least one of you can behave.” Wonwoo turns his attention to you again.
“Enjoying the power trip, Wonwoo?” You place your hands over his thighs, rubbing them up and down.
“It’s Sir for you, little brat.” He puts his hand behind your neck and brings your face close enough to let his cock slap against your cheek. “Now put your smartass mouth to good use, will you?”
“And what if I don’t want to?” You rile him up even more.
Wonwoo threads his hands in the back of your hair and forcefully slides his cock in your mouth. You gag when the tip hits your throat, but you manage to suppress your reflex with ease.
“Fuck, honey…” Vernon curses under his breath and starts palming himself over his pants.
“No need to be jealous, Vernon - I’m sure you have experienced this already, right?” Wonwoo chuckles as he uses your hair as leverage to fuck your face.
“I could get used to this, Y/N - this cock-stuffed version of yours is quite likable.”
You grunt in response and purposefully drag your teeth over his cock, eliciting a hiss from him. He drags you off his cock and pulls you upwards, forcing your back to arch.
“Do that one more time and your daddy will find out his precious daughter is a fucking slut.” He threatens you.
“You don’t want to do this, Sir.” You slur the title on purpose. “You’ll be at loss in the end, especially after fucking me like you wanted to,” you grip his wrist, “So, I suggest you keep your mouth shut and I’ll let you fuck me stupid. How does that sound?” You grin.
“Little bitch.” Wonwoo scoffs and puts your mouth back on his cock.
“Fuck, Y/N, you look so damn pretty.” Vernon moans on the side, his own pants long unbuttoned, hand stroking his pre-cum coated dick. 
Your eyes flit to the younger man and you send him a wink, but it doesn’t go unnoticed by Wonwoo.
“Eyes on me, brat. And you,” he snaps his head towards Vernon, “You better not fucking cum until I say so.”
“S-Sir, I won’t-”
“Don’t. Fucking. Cum.” He repeats with something akin to a growl.
“Fuck, I won’t!” Vernon whines in defeat, a bead of sweat rolling down his neck, his hand slowing down to keep himself on edge.
You moan around Wonwoo’s cock, nails digging in the fabric of his pants as you hollow your cheeks and do your best to bring him closer to his orgasm.
“Shit, I’m gonna cum- You better swallow every last drop like you do with him, princess.” 
You bat your eyelashes to let him know you’re ready and he presses your head until you’ve taken him till the base. You can feel the saltiness of his cum coursing down your throat. You pin your eyes on Wonwoo and stare at him until you’ve sucked his cock clean, swallowing till the last drop.
He retracts his hand and lets you get off his lap, whispering a few words in your ear, low enough to not be heard by anyone else.
“I don’t mean to interrupt but I really need to fucking cum and I don’t want to bust my nut all over the suit.” Vernon half moans, hand gripping his cock tight.
You move between his legs with a sultry smile and engulf his cock with your mouth. It only takes him a few harsh sucking motions of your lips to make him cum, a string of heavy breaths and moans coming out of his mouth.
You release his shaft with an obscene popping sound, opening your mouth to show him the amount of cum in it. You swallow it in one gulp, licking your lips clean.
“Filthy little slut.” Wonwoo clicks his tongue as he tucks himself back in.
“Couldn’t agree more.” Vernon clears his throat and tidies himself as well.
“That was definitely fun,” you sit back on the leather seats and open your purse to take out a pack of wet wipes and clean your hands. A small hair brush follows right after and you fix your hair, as if they were never touched in the first place.
“How is your makeup still intact?” Vernon asks you with narrowed eyes.
“Ever heard of waterproof makeup?” You side eye him.
“As long as Daddy is paying, everything must be on point for his pretty little heiress.” Wonwoo comments. “We’re here, be ready.”
“No need to remind me of my job, Wonwoo.”
As soon as he opens the door of the limousine to help you out, you’re welcomed with countless flashing cameras and microphones shoved in your way, but Vernon rushes next to your side to keep them at a safe distance. 
You put on your finest smile for the cameras, knowing which way to turn your head so the gossip magazines will have only your best shots. 
The noises of the crowd are drowned out once the three of you enter the venue of the gala and your bodyguards double check that everything is okay and you can proceed.
“How ironic to see the two of you being so professional while you were cumming like highschool boys just a few minutes ago.” You giggle.
“How ironic to see you acting like a proper lady after sucking off your security entourage in your daddy’s limousine like a cheap whore.” Wonwoo smirks and you fight back the urge to hit his head with your purse, as you walk over to the table with your assigned seat.
“You didn’t have to be so sassy about it.” Vernon covers his mouth to hide his grin.
“And you should have been more discreet with your visits in her room.” Wonwoo almost snaps at him with a stern look on his face.
“You’re not actually gonna snitch, are you?” The younger man looks at him partially horrified.
Wonwoo’s lips curl in a dirty smirk and he leans into Vernon’s ear.
“As long as you’re willing to stand guard in front of her door all night long while I’m teaching the little brat some manners, then your dirty secret is safe with me.”
Vernon pokes his cheek with his tongue, wishing he was able to shove his fist in Wonwoo’s face.
“So? Are you willing to do that, Chwe?”
“.....Yes sir.”
“That’s what I thought.”
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astrologylunadream · 1 year ago
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Their Hidden Fantasies of You🥵👅🖤 [SPICY] (Pick a card/Tarot love reading)
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Hey it's Lunadream~ Here's a special reading this time on their hidden fantasies about you, yes you, enjoy~ hope you find your message♥️
(This one gets spicy beware🔥 darker themes included.)
Notice: Only take what resonates because the most important thing is your own judgement!♡ If anything doesn't resonate, don't worry! It's not your message right now <3 (Entertainment purpose only. All rights reserved)
Now, shall we begin~? ^v^ Think of the your person, and pick whichever pile that fits the energy you're feeling~🖤♥️🖤♥️
Pile 1⛓
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Pile 2🗡
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Pile 3🏚
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Pile 4🤝
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Take your time and choose carefully with the heart~♡
On to the readings —> 🖤
Pile 1⛓
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Sign energy: Choice, Distance, Crave, Important, Treat, Leo, Gemini, Mars, Sun, Neptune, 💁‍♀️👋👊🧛‍♀️
🖤Your person's energy: We have a lot of masculine energy right here so my pile 1's person is very bold and speaks their mind. You would describe them as "dreamy" and "hot" stuff like that lol so cute😍 Could be Leo, Gemini, Aries, or Scorpio, not really getting the Pisces vibe but for some of you maybe ヘ_(ッ)_/ Your person has a very fierce aura and they may have very intimidating features e.g arched eyebrows or a canine-like smile. They try to behave themselves and remain respectful, but I can tell they have it BAD for my pile 1!!🔥❤ Your person is giving off such a bad boy/girl vibe. They are so independent and no one can tell them what to do, they just do what they want~ They're a very physical person and they might sometimes get aggressive with you and lose control of themselves, this is only out of intense attraction for my lovely pile 1.😌 But they do their best to keep it together and not let their wild side get the best of them. Their voice is a huge turn on for you, and if they slick their hair back... that's when you lose it LOL🤣😳 Very strong willed individual, they have a great sense of self. The type to have a lot of admirers aswell.
💭Their hidden fantasies: Locked, Admiration, Force, Seduction, Closed, Sun, 5th house, Venus, Taurus, Virgo, 🧘‍♀️⛈🕸📆 OMGGG things just got heated in here😭😖 It's gonna be intense my pile 1's your person has some dark thoughts running around in their head. They're crazy about watching you give in, it drives them seriously. They wanna handcuff you, hold you down and force you to look at them/admire them😰😰🙊❤ Oh my gosh this is serious like they're crazy about you my pile 1... You're feeding their inner demons and aggressions they just want to unleash when you two are alone!! They want to seduce you and make you say their name... They fantasize about kissing your neck, and they wanna see how much you can take like wtf pile 1 your person is so intense and passionate about you like wow...🥵 They specifically want to make you nervous, they love the thought of you getting butterflies in your stomach as they literally consume you omg. They want to retrain and contain you while thrilling you every second... holding you down with a strong grip on your wrists as they please the hell out of you until you're moaning their name😭😭😭 Yes pile 1 that's what's in their head, and they're not telling ANYONE. Not even you... unless-👀
♥️Messages from your person: I don't wanna pressure you, I can see right through you, I can save you, It's karma, No one knows (This could be a karmic relationship you both are in together) Extra cards: Ladder, Dominant, Play, Darling, Clothes, Cancer, 6th house, Scorpio, Mars, 3rd house (WTF🥵🥱🌋⚠️)
Thank you my pile 1's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥀
I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 1 with the chains emoji~⛓ Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading♥️
Pile 2🗡
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Sign energy: Last, Lay down, Risk, Heiress, Model, South node, 7th house, Pluto, 3rd house, Gemini, 🪑🦉♋🐅
🖤Your person's energy: This could be an ex or someone from your past, it's definitely someone you have intense feelings about. I'm getting Libra or Scorpio oh hi pluto yep definitely Scorpio placements for sure.🎯 Gemini or Virgo could be in their chart or they could have these qualities. They could have Cancer in 7th house so Capricorn rising maybe!! Or Pluto in Cancer I'm seeing. Your person may be a model, they have very model-like features especially hands. I feel like you told yourself not to keep thinking about this person at one point, now here we are LOL👏💫 Your person has a very sexy appearance, you are really attracted to this person physically but also psychologically they make you 😈. They're the type to do what their told suprisingly, I feel like it's so easy to make them do whatever you want. You might not know this pile 2 but heyy now you know their little secret~ This person feels like a gamble to be with, you might feel like you're taking a huge leap of faith with them. They could be very rich or inherited lots of wealth from relatives in their family, they could he a future CEO of a company aswell. I'm getting some powerful vibes from my pile 2's person, they know what they're capable of.😌
💭Their hidden fantasies: Call, Yandere, Meant to be, Learn, Restaurant, 5th house, Eros, Neptune, 10th house, Fire, 👥🏃‍♂️🦥😩 Ohhh my pile 2 your person is totally obsessed with you and I mean (might kill) do anything for you🤭😳 They fantasize about the two of you together, sharing your experiences and everything with eachother. They can't stop thinking about calling you, they just wanna hear your voice!!🥰 Your person has suprisingly soft and sweet thoughts of you like hugging and cuddling while watching movies, eating out and walks on the beach.🌊 They actually just really fantasize about spending time with you and getting to know eachother better. But don't forget they're a little bit crazy over you too, like I mean yandere vibes over my pile 2's.😅😨 I feel like the second you two are apart they feel awful, like nothing else matters. They just wanna be around you and keep you forever. They fantasize about having fun with you, hoping you won't run away. They're addicted to you, and they secretly love the thought of moaning for you💭😳🖤 They have fantasies about you dominating them or putting them in their place, they get so turned on when you ask them to do something for you. They love being worthy for you, omg I feel like they also fantasize kissing/touching you when you're sleeping/unconscious. They fantasize of anyone that gets close to you simply disappearing, taking you all for themself.🥰🔪❤
♥️Messages from your person: Right now, You read my mind, I'm not as great as I appear, You have a lot to offer, You're pretty (Awwweee pile 2 did you hear that???😍💖) Extra cards: Audience, Work, Dance, Head, Only one, Leo, 11th house, 2nd house, 5th house, Libra
Thank you my pile 2's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥀
I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 2 with the sword emoji~🗡 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading♥️
Pile 3🏚
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Sign energy: Red, Care-taker, Shoes, Authority, Secret admirer, Uranus, Neptune, Sun, Cancer, Aries, 👅🌁🌊🙋‍♂️
🖤Your person's energy: My pile 3's your person is a very bright and charismatic person~⭐ They have a great smile that makes it hard not to smile back. Very strong masculine vibes, could have  prominent veins or muscles. They like the color red and feel drawn to it. Very likely a secret admirer or has a little crush on you. They make unique expressions especially with their mouth/tongue. May stick their tongue out often, they have a very unique tongue (just saying🙄😈❗) They may live near a bridge or body of water. They like to "wave" at people a lot haha, very friendly and outgoing. They are a very dominant type and are very assertive but also caring protective over those they care about. Care-free and fun loving individual, Their father could be very intimidating or cold. Pile 3 your person has nice ankles/feet or you may stare at their shoes at lot (because you get nervous!!🤭😳). They have your back when you need them, very supportive and helpful. I feel like they work around animals or care for them often. The type to be a shoulder to cry on, and lighten your mood.☀️ Their chest is very attractive to you, they have a very masculine chest. Seriously they just have such a dominant attitude about them!!😫😉
💭Their hidden fantasies: Black, Keep a secret, Virgo, Ability, Meant to be, 6th house, Venus, South node, 10th house, Moon, 🌡🩺💅☀️ Ohhh you guys your person has some secret thoughts abt you!! They think about you guys' past a lot, and they fantasize about a hidden love affair between you two. They want you to do as they say, submitting to their dominance.😳🥵 They fantasize about owning you, making you their little pet, controlling you, they like imagining you with a collar/leash💀🥵🥵 They want to "keep" you. Leading you, being your "savior". Taking care of you, this all makes them horny af😭 Calling your name in a commanding way, "good girl/boy" and "you did well". They can't stop thinking about your 🍒🍑, they want to touch them, grab them... the list goes on and on. Tugging on your chain, Lifting your chin up, They fantasize about the sensation of your nails on their skin. Scratches and bite marks are all up in their imagination. My pile 3 your person thinks you're so hot and meant to be with them, they want you to be theirs!!
♥️Messages from your person: Don't underestimate me, I can't control myself, You make me happy, I do, No one makes me feel this way (Ahh so cute🥰) Extra cards: Peace, Distance, 10th house, First, Eyelashes, 3rd house, Moon, Gemini, Earth, Virgo
Thank you my pile 3's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥀
I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 3 with the haunted house emoji~🏚 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading♥️
Pile 4🤝
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Sign energy: Fashion, Think outside the box, Accusation, Only time will tell, First, Gemini, Water, 2nd house, Capricorn, Scorpio, 🎭💜😢🖌
🖤Your person's energy: I'm seeing a really cute person tbh their energy is just so lovely and sweet~ They may be a painter or like drawing, could be an artist. Fashion designer is coming through, they may be into clothing. They have many charms about them, but they can be very distrustful of others. They are quick to assume things about other people, making them disappointed in nearly every encounter with someone.👥 For some reason I'm getting thay they don't get along with Gemini's easily, they could have a lot of Gemini or Mercury influence in their chart, Scorpio mercury is likely. Could be Capricorn or Taurus, They could have Mercury in the 2nd house. For a lot of you this person is a Libra rising which makes sense because of the fashion, they like aesthetically pleasing things. This could be you they find pleasing pile 4~😊 You could be dating this person but for most of you I'm getting not yet in a relationship with them. I feel like your person plays around with you often and enjoys getting on your nerves. On the other hand, they might not outwardly express themselves on the surface, actually I'm getting for some of you this person only expresses their emotions through art or creative ideas. Only then will you see a glimpse of their true feelings.🤍🖤
💭Their hidden fantasies: Boyfriend, Attraction, Tease, Foreign, End, 9th house, Virgo, Air, Taurus, Sagittarius, 💉💎🆚️♋ Hmmm okayyy we got some heavy Sagittarius energy this could be a sign that they wanna explore my pile 4's to the fullest. Your person has fantasies of taking you to a foreign place/country far away, taking you on a crazy adventure just to have you all to themselves. I feel like the wanna see how much you can take, mentally and physically. So they're always teasing you, trying to get reactions out of you. They have fantasies of biting your neck playfully and watching you freak out, they love the thought of you blushing over them. They want to please themselves with you, and surprise you with crazy fun.🥵😝💫 They wanna try so many different new things with you, and you're their test subject. They want you to see them as hot and attractive, they just wanna get you on your knees for them.🔥 Playing around, wearing you down, kissing you roughly when you're weak and vulnerable. They fantasize a lot about these sort of things with you, Your thighs are a turn on for them, as well as your neck and stomach. They want to give you marks all over so you know you're theirs. They imagine you falling head over heels for them, this is what they want the most. They want you to be in awe over them, your devotion is their biggest fantasy. And they just wanna have a crazy wild fun time😈💥💋🎆
♥️Messages from your person: I can't control myself, Give me more, I can't take anymore, You deserve the best, Because of you, I have a lot to offer (Ahh they're so into my pile 4's😍) Extra cards: Vision, Emotions, Future, Red, Expand, Mars, Cancer, Venus, Water, 6th house (They really want a future with you, they want to stay with you. They're serious you guys!!💐💍🖤)
Thank you my pile 4's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥀
I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 4 with the holding hands emoji~🤝 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading♥️
Wanna see more readings like this? Check out my tumblr for accurate readings for you!🖤🌊🥀
Thanks for reading everyone! \(*^w^)/🖤 -Lunadream <3
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helslastangel · 3 months ago
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Mars in 1H & 7H Synastry: From My Experiences 🔞
Minors, do not interact. This one's not for you.
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I know this is widely known with 1H Mars synastry, but it bears repeating: this is such an electric and sexy aspect to have!
...IF you like each other. But if you don't?
Especially if the attraction is one-sided? It is SO cringe. One of you could end up hating the other easily.
In fact, let me tell you two stories that show just how differently things can go with this aspect.
Positive 1H Mars Synastry
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Guy A: Leo Sun, Virgo Moon, Cancer Rising & Venus
I have my Mars in his 1H and his Venus is in my 1H.
This a VERY physical aspect, so if you're the type who loves long hugs, hugs from behind, poking, nibbling, cuddling, kissing and a LOT of sex, even after YEARS together, then keep an eye out for this aspect.
Guy A was my boyfriend of 4 years and we broke up right around the time we would have been talking engagement and such. He was also my best friend for 8 years (which would be 15 years now if we hadn't stopped talking a year after the break up).
I was wildly attracted to this guy from day one. And vice versa! And when we finally got together? Literally could not stop touching each other. It was so funny at times. You know those annoying couples trying to hold hands, steer the cart, and pick stuff up all at once in the grocery store? Yeah, we were that couple. Typically, if I wasn't literally on his lap, I'd be under his arm or pretty much pressed up beside him somehow-and vice versa. Watching TV? Someone's head would be in the other's lap, someone's hands would be in the other's hair, or rubbing their arm or belly.
I remember the first time Guy A and I went on a cute lunch date, before we officially got together. Everyone was pointing and giggling at us because it was sooooo obvious we both couldn't keep our hands off each other at all. 😂
To this day, neither his parents nor mine can believe we didn't get married. We probably should have, tbh. Lol.
Negative 1H Mars Synastry:
Guy B: Gemini Sun, Cancer Moon & Rising, Aries Venus.
I also have my Mars in his 1H. (His moon is in my 1H).
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Mars in 1st synastry in one-sided connections is the absolute worst because one of you is madly (VERY madly) in lust confused for love, and the other is perpetually annoyed but attached to the adrenaline rush from all the static, especially if life isn't otherwise exciting at the time.
Guy B was long-term frenemy who I did NOT like romantically and barely liked platonically. We met on a dating site and the conversation was great but from the 1st date in person, I was instantly turned off. All his mannerisms annoyed me, I wasn't attracted to him, and I didn't want him to touch me at all. My reflex was to pull away when he tried. He was extremely attracted to me for some reason despite this, and never let it go. Not even years later. He begged to stay friends when I declined a 2nd date and I was too nice back then so I reluctantly agreed.
Every time he touched me, I wanted to backflip into a volcano. A simple hug made me irrationally angry if he tried to linger half a second too long. It didn't help that he'd always complain about me giving "church hugs."
And before the men start carrying on about how he must have been short, yada yada yada... no, lol he's 6' 5" and fairly good-looking. Just didn't like him then and still don't now.
Our dynamic was always very aggressive, especially from my end. Even our mutual friends noticed that I seemed like a different person specifically around him and not in a good way. I was verbally combative and physically tense around him, even my voice sounded less soft and I was extremely sarcastic. I don't know if he's into girls who are normally like that or if his Aries Venus just liked the challenge, but that annoyed me even more. My dad met him once and immediately acted like he wasn't even there and my mom was like "Yeah, no, don't ever date each other because one of you won't make it out of that alive, it's very obvious."
She's definitely not wrong, our entire "friendship" was a strange anomaly defined around me being perpetually annoyed that he existed but also finding entertainment in all the toxicity and him pretending not to notice that Id happily sell him to the devil for a bag of chips and continuously convincing himself that I secretly liked him.
I told him multiple times he was free to react like a normal human being and not talk to me and his response was, "Eh, I know but somehow even though I hate arguing, I don't really mind arguing with you. Like I hate it but at the same time, it's you. I'm used to it now."
Idk to say about that but yeah, there you have it folks. The moral of the story is: there are always two sides to a coin 😂
Synastry is something that can go two (if not more) ways. No placement or aspect is ever guaranteed to be positive or negative, though some skew one way or the other. If they were, we could all find our perfect matches just by picking birth charts out of a jar and studying them. Be mindful and listen to what your heart and gut tell you and then use your head.
All that being said though, can I talk about 7H Mars synastry for a sec? GOSH I LOVE when someone's Mars is in my 7H.
Mars in 7H Synastry (Positive)
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Guy C: Aries Sun, Scorpio Moon, Scorpio Rising, Aries Venus
He has Capricorn Mars in my 7H and my gawd. So intentional. This was eons ago. Technically my second boyfriend, but this was the first serious boyfriend who I had all my first times with. The moment my very own McSteamy decided he wanted to date me, there was no long drawn out "should I, shouldn't I, she loves me, she loves me not" - none of that wishy-washy shit. He strolled right up to me and said, "Look, you're allowed to say yes, no, or "get lost, fool" -whatever you want. And I know this may seem a bit soon, and to be honest when I first met you, I didn't know what to think, you kinda seemed like a miss-goody-two-shoes type. But getting to know you for a couple months? I realize you're actually quite a rebel and adventurous like me, but also smart and know how to lay low and play a character when you need to. Anyway, I'd really like to kiss you, but I'm gonna ask you to be my girlfriend first, so let me know."
Well, hell I said yes before he was even done talking and he picked me right up and kissed me against the wall. That was my first kiss too, and a great memory. I love direct people who know what they want, aren't scared to take a risk and are comfortable taking the lead, especially when it's a relationship. That's a Capricorn Mars right there. With Capricorn moon in my 7H that was literally like hitting the jackpot- except I was so young. He was 8 years older than me and ready to settle down. I was just about to fly the nest and see the world and he was kind enough to realize this and not hold me back when I decided to leave.
I will say this placement is excellent if you're sure about wanting a family, kids, and the whole white picket fence thing. I made the right choice as I'm still childfree by choice now and would rather live a semi-nomadic life, working and traveling the world with someone who is the same kind of crazy as me.
I'm not sure if I've experienced any negative Mars 7H house synastry. There are so people I've connected with whose birthdays I've either forgotten or didn't ask for, so I don't have their charts. Of the charts I do have, Guy C is the only one I have this aspect with. I haven't quite felt the same 100% confident, 'all-in' relationship energy from anyone else.
I am curious about how the negative side of this would go, so if any of you have had bad experiences with Mars 7H synastry and want to share, let's meet in the comments 😹
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starlostastronaut · 4 months ago
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SUNSETS AND BUCKET LISTS
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han jisung × reader - fluff, childhood friends to lovers, college au - 1.8k
summary - spending your last day with your best friend before school should be sad, but this time it took an unexpected turn
cw - use of yn?
links - masterlist
so! i'm almost late but, still made it in time. i guess you could call this ji's bday fic (tho there will be more sunshine twins content coming soon), but most importantly, happy birthday katsy!! ( @catiuskaa ) this one is for you <3333
and shout out to my mars who saved me several times writing this. not proofread and idk what is that ending, but i hope you like it! <3
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“Morning, sleepyhead,” Jisung whispered into your ear, his hot breath spilling over your skin, making you shiver and instantly startling you awake. Or mostly awake. Still half asleep, your brain only registered that someone is in very close proximity to you and we do not like that, before your hand tightened on your plushie and you whacked Jisung in the face.
“Ow, what’s that for?” he whined, dramatically holding his palm to the right side of his face. His mischievous grin was replaced by a scowl and he looked at you like you just stole his dog, not simply hit him with a stuffed cat. With your consciousness finally catching up to speed, you realized that it was not an alien coming to abduct you, but it was Han Jisung, your best friend since you were three years old. And he carried the title proudly, always mentioning your sixteen years long friendship to anyone who (did not) care.
“Sorry, Ji, oh my god!” You swiftly rose up on the bed, it was a miracle your head didn't collide with Jisung's as well. “I thought you were, I don't know, a pervert or something.”
“YN,” Jisung sighed. “It's literally just us two and our parents. There's a security system in the house. How would a pervert even get in?”
He was right. Growing up in the same town, just three houses away, your families have known each other very well. It was a tradition that started when you and Jisung were old enough to travel and actually understand a vacation. Your families always rented out the same beach house to spend the last two weeks of summer holiday together.
By now, you knew the place front to back, being able to move around while blinded and you would be just fine. So Jisung was right, but you couldn’t possibly let him have the win so easily.
“I don't know,” you shrugged. “They always find a way?” Jisung gave you an unimpressed look. “Okay, okay. But it's still your fault. You shouldn't have woken me up like a creep.”
“Blah, blah, blah.” Jisung rolled his eyes and grabbed your hands, quite literally dragging out of bed and out of the warm comfort of the covers. You hissed and a shiver ran over your skin as your, due to the summer heat barely clothed, body made contact with the cold floor. “Come on, get up, we have so much stuff to do!”
Jisung let go of your hands, bouncing around happily. You shook your head, amazed at the amount of energy he had so early in the morning. Had he eaten just sugar for breakfast?
You slowly stood up, rummaging through the closet for some clothes. “Turn around at least, perv,” you laughed, smacking him over his chest with a shirt. Jisung laughed, but left the room, giving you privacy to change. Not wanting to keep him waiting, you put on the first shorts and shirt you found. It's not like you were going to meet many people so who cares, right? On your way out you grabbed a hoodie too. The summer was in fact nearing its end and the mornings were often chilly. And knowing Jisung, you will have breakfast outside.
As per your prediction, the small outside table was full of food, with Jisung impatiently waiting for you, bouncing his leg and playing with a fork.
After a quick breakfast, Jisung shared his plan for the day. You listen in disbelief, wondering how he wanted to fit all of that into one day. Despite your doubts, you were going to do everything for it to happen though.
This was your last day together. In pursuit of your respective dreams, you and Jisung not only attended different universities, but in different cities too and the distance made it even harder. In order to visit each other, you would have to spend several hours traveling, and that was a luxury you couldn’t afford. You tried, but then a test came up, or a friend's birthday party or Jisung was sick… After three months you gave up trying, resigning to seeing your best friend on Christmas and summer only.
It was hard enough to leave him last year, but you called each other a lot. In the beginning that was. Once you got your bearings and university properly started, you were often so exhausted you fell asleep on the video call. Or didn't call at all, because Jisung forgot to charge his phone in the whirlwind of classes and deadlines.
You never knew it was possible to miss someone so much. Being without Jisung felt like someone was slowly tearing off your limbs. And when you saw him at Christmas, it felt like the puzzle finally found its missing piece. A week later, in your dorm room with friends and soju, some revelations were had, but by the time summer came around, your mind was in a completely different place.
And this time, knowing what kind of year you were up against, letting go of Jisung for another several months suddenly felt impossible. Knowing this shared vacation was coming, both you and Jisung made a list of activities to do and places nearby to visit. But with how excited you both were, you put off checking boxes in favour of lazing around, watching anime, going to the pool and talking for hours.
So there you were, left with a list impossible to complete by the end of today. Yet nothing would deter you from trying.
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“I think I'm actually gonna die.” You fell onto your towel, lying motionlessly on the beach. Not even having enough energy to watch the sunset, which you would have taken countless pics of any other day.
By some miracle, you managed to complete Jisung's entire checklist for the day, which left you completely exhausted. You were seriously thinking of asking Jisung to carry you back, because unlike you, he seemed as if powered by the air he breathed - he hadn't run out of energy the whole day.
“Noo, you can't die yet. We still have to check off the paddleboard at the sea,” Jisung said. And there it was, he actually brought the paddleboard down to the beach. You saw it lying next to your things when you sat back up.
“Ji, seriously?” you laughed. “You can't swim? And it's dark.” The idea seemed a little funny and a whole lot crazy. It was one thing to be at the pool, where there was a bottom and a limited amount of water. To go to the wild, open sea, in the dark, and tired after the whole day? k
“Actually… I can. Kinda. Lix taught me,” Jisung admitted. You knew who he was talking about, Jisung wouldn't shut up about his roommate and new best friend Felix, he actually mentioned him in about every conversation he could. It was kind of cute actually. You were worried Jisung would struggle, being an introvert with social anxiety, but Felix waltzed into his life and saved him for you.
“Okay…” Felix teaching him solved one problem at least. But you still didn't feel like it was a good idea. “Ji, do we have to? What if something happens? We're tired, we're alone here…”
Jisung’s shoulders slumped. “Right, yeah you're right. I just had this plan and I wanted to… nevermind.”
That wasn't fair. Now you felt bad. God, why was Jisung so cute? “Maybe we could… I don't know. Put it just by the shore and sit on it?” you suggested, wanting to make Jisung happy. You would do anything to make him happy, even go out on the sea when you thought about it.
Alone together on the beach, the sun setting over the water, the atmosphere was romantic. And thought your brain, because all your feelings that you pushed aside to focus on quality time with Jisung, now came rushing back all at once.
Jisung's face lit up. “Yeah, we can do that. I guess it counts as completing.” You helped Jisung push the paddleboard just behind the first waves, sitting on it with your feet in the water, still in the safe distance to the shore.
You looked over the horizon, the sun reflecting on the water begging to be photographed. “Selca?” you asked. Jisung nodded and leaned closer, posing for the low quality picture. With barely any natural light left, the photo was bound to be blurry and dark, but you always liked that kind of aesthetic anyway.
Feeling daring in the moment, you pressed your lips to Jisung's cheek. Barely, just a few seconds, but enough to capture on your phone.
“YN…” Jisung whispered. If it wasn't so dark, you would see the pink dusting his face.
“Sorry, I just… I just had to,” you said. What did you have to lose anyway? You were leaving tomorrow morning and wouldn't see Jisung for another few months. “I had to know what it feels like,” you whispered.
Jisung lowered his gaze, choosing to look at the waves rather than looking at you. Somehow, the silence was scarier than a rejection of your implied confession.
“Say something Ji, please,” you begged, not knowing how to bear the crushing weight of the silence anymore. You feared what message it carried.
“You crossed the last box for me.”
Before you could ask what it meant, Jisung took out a crumpled piece of paper and handed it to you. His checklist of activities for the vacation. When you unfolded the small ball of paper, your eyes skimmed over the completed activities, all the way to the last one.
Kiss YN in some super romantic moment.
“I planned to tell you,” Jisung spoke up. “How I feel. I guess you beat me to it.” He lifted his head to look at you. “I did understand it correctly, right? It wasn't a platonic friend kiss, because Felix sometimes gives me those and if it was then forget everything I said because-”
You surged forward, interrupting his rambling with your lips on his. It was a wonder you didn't fall off the paddleboard, with how much force was used. You felt him freeze and smile, as he slowly kissed you back, overcoming the initial shock and surprise.
And you kissed, until there was no sun in the sky and your parents had to go look at why you took so long. That night, you laid in Jisung's bed, making promises and wishes for the upcoming year, already making plans, determined to not give up this time.
Somehow, coming back to campus and the insanity your university could be sometimes, wasn't as hard as it was last year. This time around, you had something new to look forward to in the darkest moments of endless texts and assignments. You had a boyfriend and a promise to keep. No giving up this time. And you both dutifuly kept it.
Jisungie <3
still alive after that test?
YN <3
barely
i'm dead inside and lonely
my roommate's out this weekend on a family thing
leaving me all alone in this dorm
Jisungie <3
good thing i have no classes this friday
see you then ynnie <3
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clubdionysus · 8 months ago
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[BAD DECISION #17] Jeon Jungkook
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warnings: WELL WELL WELL. mentions of the red witch. post-gym kook. questionable conversations that shouldn't happen between friends, totally normal touching of genitals to prove points in aforementioned conversations, kitchen escapades, whiny koo <3 titty worship, spanking, titty sucking, fingering, a lil mutual masturbation, cockwarming (or at least an attempt!), unprotected sex, jk on top, the starluvrs are bad at maths!, multiple positions (prone bone my beloved <3), he finishes on her back, lovely stuff!! just friendly tho!
a/n: the header image is another lost relic, but this time i can't even remember the base photo </3
soundtrack: just a little bit - enhypen
wc: 11.2k
bd total wc: 540k (ongoing)
AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI
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The soft cotton duvet cover on Jeongguk's bed welcomes you back far more warmly than it really should do; like a 'hi, honey, welcome home' , or an 'I've missed you'.  
It's fitting that the inanimate objects of his room carry such benevolence, when he himself is an open log fire on a winter's night. Warm, warm, warm is Jeon Jeongguk, and you've been cold, cold, cold for so long that the sudden heat is almost jarring.
That's how you justify the obscure feeling in the pit of your stomach when Jeongguk starts talking about blind dates, and how he always wanted to go on one when he was younger.
He reckons that the only reason that he hadn't was because he's 'a simple man of simple pleasures'.  
The hoops he needed to jump through to get a blind date - quite simply just asking someone to set it up for him - had been too challenging. You've alleviated that stress for him.
"See," you smile, folding his bird back up and tossing it over to him. You're both on his bed, staring up at the flock of birds still soaring above you, just out of reach. "We're fulfilling a childhood dream. You are getting something out of this whole deal."
You don't look at him, but you know he rolls his eyes and smiles when he does so. "Never said I wasn't, Disco Ball."
He's met with silence as you glance over at him. It's not an unwelcome nickname, but it's one he doesn't use too often these days. Always calls you Byeol.
"What?" he asks and he turns to face you when you don't reply, but you say nothing.
The more you let it simmer, the worse it gets. He's not called you Disco Ball in so long. Part of you thinks he's reducing your friendship. Addressing you like he did when he didn't know you too well. Creating distance. Forming space on a featherdown quilt that draws you both in like quicksand. He'll have to try harder if a wider margin is what he's after.
It's stupid, 'cause you know the name comes from a place of affection, but it makes you feel insecure.
"We'll still be friends, right?" You ask a little quietly. Jeongguk's brows grow taut, a slight frown forming on his features. Doesn't understand where such a question has come from. "If you get a girlfriend, I mean? We can still be friends?"
Jeongguk's skin is hot. Prickly. An automatic response to discomfort - but then his lips soften into a kind smile. Despite the offence that could be taken from you asking such a question - thinking so little of him - he's not naive to the way in which you work. He understands. People you've loved have left when things got inconvenient for them. He's been through it, too.
And so the walls that want to come up in defence are kept at bay. He doesn't let them rise. Instead, he meets you at the shores.
"Yoongi invited you to dinner," he nudges your shoulder. "Tae is practically in love with you for all the help you've given him. Dionysus relies on you drinking the bar dry every other weekend to keep it afloat. We couldn't stop being friends even if we tried."
His answer should satisfy you, yet your mind is marred by the same thought repeating over and over: Hayun probably used to get invited to dinner, too.
You aren't naive. You know his friends are just as kind as he is. They'd have welcomed anyone Jeongguk deemed important into their social circle.
"What about Hayun?"
Jeongguk frowns. "What about her?"
"Well," you say slowly, looking back up towards the birds, not wanting to watch his reaction unfold on his features like a letter of commiseration.
Before you can even articulate a reply, Jeongguk stops you.
"Don't. It's not the same. Hayun... That situation was different. Things were different. Plus, she's still my friend. Our friend. All of us. She just lives in a different city, that's all. The only reason she isn't around is because of proximity. We're still friends. Just like you and me are still gonna be friends. We've no reason not to be."
The situation is different. You're well aware of this. You've known Jeongguk for all of five minutes; she was a much more permanent fixture in his life. They had a history that you wouldn't even be able to comprehend; private jokes, and stolen moments when they thought their friends wouldn't notice. Their friends. Not just Jeongguk's.
She'd been as much a part of the friendship group as Jeongguk had been; the only difference was that she'd moved away. If she hadn't, would there even be space for you in their lives? Would Seoyeon be desperate for there to be another girl around? Would Jeongguk have felt just as fondly towards you? Would he have noticed your disco ball eyes in the dark of Dionysus or would he have been too busy searching for her in a crowded room?
Or would the time spent on you be spent on her instead?
The thought is unpleasant. It weaves its way through your bloodstream like a needle with dark red string threaded through its loop. It scratches and stabs at your insides until it breaks through the flesh of your bottom lip. Sews your mouth shut. Stops you from talking; from screaming how unfair you think it is that you're being equated to someone who destroyed him.
You don't think she deserves to be thought fondly of, but if Jeongguk knew that, you'd be the one he thinks negatively of. He leapt to her defence without you even starting an attack.
"Friends don't hurt their friends," you say quietly.
Life doesn't work that way. People hurt the ones they care about all the time - or at least you use that reasoning to comfort yourself whenever Seokjin shows up just to let you down.
"She didn't mean to," he replies. "I'm the one who caught feelings. I'm the one who misread things. She stayed the same. My hurt? It's on me, Byeol."
There's a sincerity to his voice that absolves her of blame; makes her innocent in whatever transpired between the pair of them. You know that you only have Jeongguk's side of the story, and even that is sparse and limited due to his reluctance to talk about it in any great depth, but you feel like you don't need to hear her side. He got hurt. That's enough. Your mind is made up.
Hearing him defend her so freely unnerves you. The feeling crawls beneath your skin and gnaws at your flesh. Reduces you to skin and bone.
You're silent, because you know that anything you do say will come across as mean, or as if you dislike a girl you've never met. It'd only make Jeongguk defend her more and like you less. You don't want that - as if Jeongguk wouldn't rip Seokjin to shreds at any given opportunity.
Trouble is, you can't blame him. Jeongguk has seen the impact first-hand. Wiped away tears caused by the man himself.
Hayun is just an enigma; a name rarely said, but often felt.
"What's gotten into you?" Jeongguk smiles, trying to downplay the heaviness of the atmosphere that's engulfing you both. "You're forgetting how annoying I am. You'd probably be thankful if we stopped being friends."
Though he's just teasing, you're worried that he does think that of himself. You don't want to be soppy though, so instead, you use one of his most often said phrases against him.
"I think if we stopped being friends I would simply die."
It earns a laugh. He nudges your shoulder. Tells you that you really gotta stop stealing his catchphrases and the things he does.
"Oh fuck off," you laugh. "What else have I stolen?"
A whole host of things.
"The mirror thing," is all he says, noticing your confusion immediately. He reaches over and tenderly clasps your chin. Doesn't notice the tiny gasp that gets caught in your throat - or if he does, he doesn't mention it. Turns your head, so that you're looking at him, and says " 'watch'. "
You close your eyes and smile. Nod. "Ah. That. The mirror thing. "
"See," he smirks, not that you can see. Your eyes are still closed and they'll remain that way until you decide you're no longer embarrassed. "Told you that you copy me."
"I don't copy," you smirk right back, despite your firmly shut eyes. Jeongguk likes the glitter you're wearing today. It's golden-hued. "Just a fast learner."
"Oh yeah?" he says, a laugh catching in his throat. "Watcha learnt about me?"
You whisper now, a little smug. "That you really like mirrors."
"Yeah," he concedes far more quickly than you expected him to. He turns his focus back to the birds on his ceiling, though you think he's gotten a little closer to you. "Yeah, you're right about that - but you know why I like them?"
"Pray tell," you grin, vaguely aware of the fact the conversation feels far more flirty than it really should.
"You do this thing," Jeongguk says, as a hand rests by his crotch. He's not hard, but he is a little firmer than he should be.
It's just cause he's thinking about sex. Thinking about the sound of it. The sound of you . The sight of it. Of you . The scent of it. You . Not the taste, 'cause you've not given him the luxury of that yet. He doesn't really register the fact he's pressing down on himself. Gripping. Feeling .
"It's that first look," he continues, voice dulcet. "It's like you can't register what you're seeing. Your eyes go all wide, and you look at me as if you're too nervous to look anywhere else. Dunno. Lets me know how much you like what I do. Bit of a power trip, I guess. Always gets me."
"Gets you what?"
"Hard."
The declaration is so brash that you can't help but giggle. "You hard now?"
"Thinking about it isn't the same as seeing it," Jeongguk admits, turning his head towards you - but your eyes are still closed, a smile plastered all over your face. He finds himself smiling, too. 
"But I mean..." He toys with your hand. Draws it to the top of his thighs. Gives you the chance to pull away. You don't. "Feel for yourself."
You whisper his name. 
He whispers right back. "What?"
"You know what," you tell him, as if your palm isn't right where he left it, and as if your grip isn't as firm as his cock. 
"What?" he teases again, feigning indifference - and then he fucking tenses. Moves his hips. Pushes up into your palm. "It's just anatomy, B. Nothing new."
Maybe not, but that nickname? That feels new. Feels like the opposite of him calling you disco ball earlier. Makes your breath hitch. Has him smirking as he looks at your lips. Bites down on his own. Knows this is trouble, but thinks he'd quite like to get in some.
See, you're the determined type. Once you set your mind to things, you do them. He's witnessed it first-hand multiple times. The second he mentioned the art cafe to Tae, he knew you'd make it happen. It's what you do.
And so he knows that you're setting him up that blind date whether he likes it or not. He knows you're gonna choose well for him. He knows, come this time next week, there'll probably be a moral complex that comes with the birds hanging above the pair of you.
But he's not ready for that. Not yet. 
There's so much to do. 
So many birds that haven't been set free.
A pleasant little hum vibrates in his throat as you palm the firmness beneath his sweats. His hips pulse. You daren't open your eyes - especially not as your thumb brushes against the waistband of his trousers. He hums again. Pushes his shoulders down into his mattress. Adjusts his body. Edges closer to you. Says nothing as your thumb sinks beneath the elastic of his sweats.
It doesn't go anywhere. You wait. His hips pulse.
"Swear you get off on torture," he purrs. 
"You're the one who started this," you murmur, trying to feign indifference, knowing full well that if he mirrors your hand position, he'll feel just how easily he gets you all riled up. "You're a sadist."
He just smiles. Tells you he's no such thing. 
And so you tell him to keep his eyes closed. Reach for his hand. Say, "Let's compare."
"Compare?" He husks, as if he doesn't know what you're doing. 
"Mhmm," you hum, bringing his hand dangerously close to your pussy. "Compare. You're getting off on torture. Maybe I am, too."
"We shouldn't be doing this," Jeongguk says, and yet as you loosen your grip, he's the one who lets his hand trail up your thigh. He's the one who strokes at the fabric of your sweats. He's the one who cups your pussy with his hand.
The top you're wearing has risen up a little, a small sliver of your stomach exposed - and then his thumb is caressing against it. 
His touch is warm, but the little gasp he does? The stutter of his breath? Oh, it's hot . So fucking hot.
"We're not doing anything," you say so sweetly that he'd believe it - or at least he would if it wasn't his own damn hand slipping into trousers. A breath hitches in your throat, and you can hear the ethereal way a laugh stutters in his throat.
"Just friendly, yeah?"
You nod. Whimper a pathetic confirmation - and then he's pressing against your underwear. Is slow as he rubs a single circular motion against you. 
"The birds are judging us," he tells you. 
"Nah," you shake your head. Take a shallow breath as he circles against you once more. "This is just revision."
"Revision?"
"Making sure we've learned from them. As long as - fuck ."
"You good there?" he teases, as if he didn't just up the speed for a moment. 
You ignore his question and continue the point that was so rudely interrupted by his pacing. "As long as we only do things the birds have already told us to do, then I think it's okay."
The pair of you are silent save for your tepid breaths. Jeongguk's fingers caress against the lace of your underwear while you palm at his excruciatingly hard cock. 
It's all rather juvenile, the way you're just touching each other up - and yet it's got your heartbeat racing. Perhaps it's because it's something so simple. Feels like there's so much more that could come of it. The great unknown: will you make Jeongguk cum? Or will you just blue ball him instead?
He really fucking hopes you'll choose the first option.
"Y'know," he says quietly. "I kinda need a shower."
It's not a lie. He freshened up at the gym, but didn't have a proper shower - didn't think he'd be taking such a long detour home.
"You wanna go shower?"
He nods. "Please."
It's laughable, really, the way neither of you says a word as he guides you to the bathroom. It's a regular occurrence at this point. 
You glance across the open-plan living room as you make your way to the bathroom, and smile at the painting hanging up beside the television. Jeongguk follows your gaze and smirks. 
"Think a future girlfriend would have an issue with that being up on the wall?"
"Maybe," you shrug. "You never have to tell her what is it, mind you. Never have to say it's... yanno."
"No I don't know, Byeol," he teases. Grips onto your shoulders to stop you from walking, and turns you to face it. Walks you both a little further into the sitting room area. Tilts his head, and you realise there's another bloody mirror in the corner of the room. You've never noticed it before. Wonder if he placed it there deliberately. "What is it?"
You narrow your eyes in the mirror. A smirk rests on his pretty lips and you can't help but bite down on yours when one of his hands creeps up your shirt. The bra you're wearing is lace; underwired but with unstructured cups. He squeezes. Fucking groans. "Shit."
"We shouldn't be doing this here," you tell him, well aware that Jimin could come home at any minute. Even going for a shower together is a risk. 
Jeongguk shrugs. "Doesn't matter."
"What if Jimin-"
"If he comes home, he comes home," Jeongguk cuts you off as he continues playing with you beneath your shirt. He wants it off. Takes it off. Faces no opposition from you. Both of his hands cup at your chest, the black lace sin beneath his hands. Your heartbeat heaves in your chest, and it's only made worse when Jeongguk nudges his nose against your hair and whispers, "maybe I'll just show him how to make you cum."
You tell him he's mean. He squeezes harder. Makes you whimper. Tells you he can be mean if you really want him to be.
But you shake your head. "Play nicely."
It's not that you don't like things a little rough and tumble - it's just that if this is the last time, you know it needs to be intimate. How else will you be able to face your fears with other people if you never even let him?
One of his hands trails to the back of your bra, and gently unsnaps the clasp, before ridding you of the lace. As much as he liked it, he likes you bare better. Likes the way your pillowy breasts frame your nipples perfectly. Likes that the soft flesh spills through the gaps in his fingers. Likes how easy it is to get you whimpering as he rolls your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.
"Nice enough?" He husks.
"Nice," you nod, eyes closed, crown of your head tipping back to rest against the top of his chest. "God, Gguk. Think I'm obsessed with the way your hands feel."
The compliment makes his heart fucking race .
He watches in the mirror. Studies the way your lips part as he toys with you. Wants to kiss you so badly. Knows he can't. Fuck . Maybe he does get off on a little torture, but this is just inhumane to him. You can feel how hard he is as he presses into the small of your back. The curse and blessing of sweatpants. 
You reach behind yourself to palm at his crotch, and are met with a nod of his head against yours. 
"Fuck, B," he whines as you toy with the outline of his cock. "I gotta - fuck - I gotta do something with my mouth. Wanna kiss you too fuckin' bad."
He doesn't even mean to admit it, but now that he has, he feels a little shameless. If he can admit that, he can admit anything. 
Maybe he'll tell you about the wet dream he had a few nights ago, and how he'd woken up to damp sheets and a ruined orgasm all because you'd made an unexpected appearance in his dream. 
Maybe he'll tell you about the fact he hasn't watched porn in weeks. Just thinks of you, instead.
Maybe he'll tell you about the fleshlight hidden in the back of his bedside cabinet drawer, and how he can't use it anymore, 'cause it doesn't look like you do.
Doesn't look like you, doesn't feel like you, doesn't smell like you. Doesn't get him cumming like you do. 
Actually, maybe he won't tell you about that last one - but he wants you to know. 
Wants you to understand just how fucking sexy he thinks you are. Wants you to acknowledge that if he can get this wrecked over you, then there must be hundreds of other men out there just the same as him. You don't need to linger for so long on your ex. 
There'll be another guy out there for you who doesn't make you feel like shit; who only ever wants to make you feel good. So good. So, so-
"Oh God, yeah," he whines as you finally slip your fingers beneath his waistband and into his trousers. His hips pulse, wanting more, more, more of you. "So fucking good."
"My lips," you husk as his fingers dig into your soft chest. The grip is tight. Needy. "They're off limits."
"Lips," he nods. Clenches his jaw as he tries to control his breathing. Swallows his nerves down. "And the rest of you?"
You open your eyes to find his already on you in the mirror. He's hungry. Wanting. Salivating. He looks fucking primal, as if he's fighting every instinct he has just to keep your boundaries respected. Makes you wanna break every single one of them down.
Turning your head ever so slightly, just so your nose can nudge against his, you realign your faces. His lips are pouty. Pink. Pretty. Perfectly out of reach. Yet when you nod, they brush against yours tenderly. You don't let it happen again. "Be specific."
God, his cock is too fucking hard to be playing games like this. He wants to curse you out. Wants to be fucking mean. Wants to tell you to stop being a little bitch and just let him have his way with you - but he promised he'd play nicely. 
"Every inch of your skin," he says, 'cause he is actually a little too nervous to ask so politely for what he really wants.
Has been wanting it for weeks.
It's something new, to him. Something he's only ever asked for once, and it was in the heat of the moment. A moment quite a lot like this.
You smile. You know what he really wants. "That's not specific."
"But it's the truth."
Jeongguk always gets a little like this when he's riled up. A little needy. Whiney. You'd be a liar if you said you didn't enjoy it, but you know that sometimes he misspeaks. Says things he never would do if he wasn't desperately after a release. 
You never think he's lying, but you do think what he wants in the heat of the moment isn't always what he wants with a clear mind. This is one of those moments.
You purr, a little satisfied with how easy it is to get him like this. Feels like you're in control - so Jeongguk rolls your nipples between his fingers again to get you moaning. Realigns a sense of power. It's endless with the pair of you; a back-and-forth of control. It works well. Too well.
But he's feeling brazen, now. Feeling bold. Isn't nervous to tell you what he wants anymore, because the way your body reacts to his touch lets him know that you'll like it.
"Your tits, Byeol," he says. Your eyes fall to his in the mirror. He's looking directly at you. Notices the way your chest begins to heave a little heavier. Smirks. "If this is my last chance to..." he pauses. Is almost ashamed of what he wants.
"Last chance to what?" You flirt.
You bitch. You're teasing him just because you can. It makes him throb. The motion of your hand stroking above his underwear is making his cock all fat and leaky. There's a damp patch on the front of his briefs. He's ready to fuck. Wants to fuck.
But before that? Before he can even consider sinking himself into you? 
He (regretfully) pulls one of his hands away from you, bringing it to meet your hand in his trousers. He (even more regretfully) pulls you away. You pout. He smiles. 
"C'mon," he says, pulling on the hand he's just removed, leading you into the kitchen area. Will clarify it for you later.
The boys have an island that acts as a divider between the two spaces, which is exactly where he's taking you. The clothes he took off you are left by the sofa, his mind focused on one thing and one thing only: leveraging you into a better position.
You yelp a little as he dips to pick you up, gripping the back of his neck without hesitation. 
"Don't be a pussy," he grins, popping you down on the island counter. "Although now I come to think of it -" he lifts you again, getting to your feet. The way his mind darts from thought to thought, and how his body acts upon them without warning, makes you laugh. He sinks his finger into the waistband of your sweats. Pings it again your skin. "Off."
"Say please," you demand, just to be a little difficult. 
"Please."
"Please what?"
"Please," he says, eyes dark as he towers over you, his hands coming to cup your chest once more. The man's obsessed, you think. If he could read your mind, he'd tell you that you're correct. He is. "Take your trousers off."
"Why?"
God, he hates that shit-eating grin of yours. Hates that he can't kiss it away. 
And so he decides he's not gonna entertain it any longer. He grabs your hips. Spins you around. Bends you over the island, a single hand gripping the top of your thigh, the other pressing down between your shoulder blades. 
"What's the word, Byeol?" He asks, checking that you're on the same page.
"Chess," you reply a little breathlessly. This lack of control is something you're used to with him. He's never overtly dominant, always looking out for your needs first and foremost, but this feels... yeah this feels different. This is about him. 
And it makes you far more excited than you ever realised it would.
His hand trails down your back. Strokes at the line of your spine. He admires you. Takes note of the dimples just above your ass. Knows he's in trouble the second he starts squeezing at one of your cheeks. Still an ass guy.
He yanks the material of your sweats down past your ass. Fucking groans when he sees the black lace thong that sits prettily over your ass. Glances over to the bra by his sofa. Groans yet again. Yep . A matching fucking set. 
"Fuckin' vixen," he mumbles to himself, not really intending for you to hear it. Isn't sure if you had planned on getting laid today, but you're definitely dressed for it. As he grapples with the flesh of your ass, he notices just how smooth your skin is. Well moisturised. Coconutty. 
Maybe you had taken extra care in the shower that morning. Maybe you had shaved your entire body. Maybe you had been wearing a new two-piece.
That doesn't mean you were planning on letting him see. Just means your self-care routine is coming along fabulously. Well done you.
There's a bruise on the top of your hip. Jeongguk's thumb brushes against it. Doesn't apply any pressure. A small noise chirps from his throat, questioning it. 
"Pole," you remind him a little breathlessly. "Gentle with my legs, they're covered in bruises."
He nods to himself, and says, "Use 'chess' okay? Hey, look at me a sec - 'chess'. Okay? Even if it's just your legs. Don't wanna hurt you."
You're looking at him over your shoulder with a smile. His sincerity is sweet, but entirely misplaced. You want him to hurt you.
"Notice how there are no bruises on my ass?" you ask, to which he nods. You face away from him again, and sink back into the position he originally had you in, chest pressed to the counter. "Good. Change that."
He thinks he might cream his pants right there and then. 
"You're gonna fuckin' kill me."
"Oh no," you pout, voice all soft and sweet. "Wouldn't that be a shame?"
Jeongguk grapples with your ass. Caresses it. Knows you're not done talking, so is buying time. Wants to hear how you'll tease him. See how riled up it''ll get him. 
"If you die, I'll just have to fuck Jimin again."
The crack of his palm against your ass is electric. 
Your body jolts forward, Jeongguk's grip on your hip to keep you stable no match for the impact of his flat palm. Skin on fire, chest heaving, you giggle. That's all he's got?
"Y'know," you tease, and Jeongguk is pleased that you sound a little breathless. He strokes at the skin he impacted, soothing the sting. Likes that goosebumps are already forming. "He took me from behind, a lot like thi-"
He doesn't even let you finish this time before the sting of his spank is delivered. It's harder than the first one, but his hand is also far quicker to soothe this time around. 
"Yeah," he husks. "I fuckin' know."
You can hear his breathing, now. You're both panting a little. 
"Does it bother you?" you ask as he tenderly cares for your reddening skin. 
"Be specific," he speaks boldly, a little unlike himself, and you're starting to understand why he's an ass guy. Your tits make him weak. This? The way he's got control of your body? Makes him strong. 
"That I fucked Ji-"
The way he cuts you off with another domineering slap to your ass gives you his answer - but so does the way he not only soothes the skin immediately afterwards, but also how his other hand comes to rub the bottom of your spine, following the path of its curve. He's cherishing. Worshipping. 
He leans forward as his hand trails up your spine so he can reach your neck, and tenderly clasps it to he pull you back up. Turns you around. Is gentle as he lifts you back into position on the counter. 
Brushes your hair out of your face. Looks you directly in the eye. Uses this thumb to collect a rogue chunk of glitter from your cheek. Rubs it on his arm. Stains himself in you.
"It doesn't bother me," he says - not for any male sense of bravado, or acting 'chill' - but because he needs you to know it isn't a big deal. You've enough complexes as it is. He doesn't want you to ever feel shame for the things you've done. "Bothers me that he doesn't realise how lucky he was to get a pussy as good as yours. Bothers me he didn't finish the job. Bothers me that he actually got to fuck you," he grins. You grin right back. "But it doesn't bother me that it happened."
"Mm, so you won't share towels with him, but you'll share girls?" You tease. His hands toy with your chest again. Secretly, you think you like him better like this. Like it when he's weak.
"Am I sharing you?"
It's a loaded question, you think.
"Not right now," you whisper, reaching to his waistband, nose nudging against his. "Take these off."
"Say please," he whispers right back. One of your hands tangles in his hair. Pulls him away. Gets him looking into your eyes.
"Please."
How can he refuse? It's like you put him in a trance whenever he sees your disco-ball eyes. He'll do whatever you ask of him.
He takes his trousers off first, then says "shirt?"
You nod. He takes that off, too. Leaves them crumpled in a pile on the floor. Doesn't care for them at the moment. Only cares for you.
"I still need a shower," he says, as he closes the gap between you, your legs wrapping around his waist. 
"We can still get one," you tell him. Honestly, you don't really mind what you do with him. Just know that you wanna make it last. Want this feeling of safety and security for a little while longer.
His arms rest on your shoulders. Just a little taller than you in height when you're sitting like this, Jeongguk likes looking at you from this angle. Likes seeing the variations in your glitter; the small chunks and slightly bigger flakes that make you seem cosmic. He likes noticing the flecks caught on your lashes, and how he never realised quite how long they are. He doesn't think you're wearing mascara. 
You're not - but you did get your lashes done the week before. He wouldn't give a shit even if he knew. Would think it was cool, probably.
"So about that whole no-kissing thing-"
"Nope," you laugh, swatting at his clammy chest. He smirks. Presses his lips together. Shakes his head. 
And then he whines. "It's so unfair."
"If you even try, I'm yelling chess."
"Really?"
"Oh, yeah," you assure him - only for him to edge a little closer.
He's not actually going to kiss you. 
Although... if you let him, he might. 
"Chess!"
"Ughhhh," he whines again, pulling away. "So mean, disco ball."
"What if I promise to make you cum?"
He narrows his eyes. "Fine."
One of his hands drops to your chest again. Keeps on coming back. Can't resist. Ass guy? Yeah right.
The other drops to your underwear. Toys with the lace. 
"Bird revision, right?" Jeongguk asks. "So we can only do things we've already done?
You nod. 
"Okay," he whispers, before pulling away from you. "Hold that thought."
You watch as he walks around to the kitchen sink, his thick cock tenting in his underwear, desperate for something. Anything . 
And yet your birds? 
All focus on you. You've no idea how the fuck you're gonna get him cumming. Sure, there was the mutual masturbation one, but you'd promised that you'd be the one making him come. Maybe there's room for loopholes.
It wouldn't be the first time the pair of you have skirted the truth of what a bird could entail. A bird, a plane. Whatever.
Hands under the water, Jeongguk's focus is only on cleaning himself. He preens you so often, fixes your hair, your glitter, that it's nice seeing him in the same capacity but for himself. Realistically, it's all for you, still. 
He glances up. Looks a little bashful. 
The distance reduces the pair of you to your natural states; just Jeongguk and his Stargirl. He gazes at you often, but it's different when he's blinded by the light. With a little space, he's reminded of the fact you belong on this earth, too. 
It's like the pair of you are tangled up in a Jekyll and Hyde situation, instead, it's who you are when your clothes are on, versus when your clothes are off. He likes both of them. Doesn't think they can coexist though. 
"What?" he asks when you smile at him. You just shrug and shake your head.
"Weird isn't it?" 
He comes to stand in front of you again. Your legs don't wrap around him, but he does put his palms on the top of your thighs. Looks pensive as he asks, "What is?" 
He's grinning, too, though. His skin is getting all prickly again. Can smell your arousal. Wants to fucking drink it. 
"You 'n' me," you shrug, letting your arms snake around his neck. You're sat up straight, and the gap between your chests closes. "Like, I was maybe 15 seconds away from kissing you." The admission makes Jeongguk want to die. "But then when you were washing your hands..."
"I was just Jeongguk again, right?" He assumes. You nod. "Same for me. Like we're two different people: who we are when we're horny and who we are when we're 'normal'."
"So fucking weird," you laugh, deciding that it solidifies what a great friendship you have. Convince yourself it's gonna make it so much easier when he starts dating. If you can separate the Jeongguk you mess about with and the Jeongguk you're friends with, then there's no reason the friendship should be lost.
"Too weird to pick back up where we left off?" He says quietly. Nudges his nose against yours. Strokes his hands up your back. Pulls his chest away so he can sneak his hands to your tits once more. Squeezes. Makes you moan.
You shake your head. "Do it again."
He does. 
Is firm, as he does so, his large hands cupping your chest so delicately that you almost want him to be rougher - but you like it when he's gentle. Like how well he takes care of you. His thumbs stroke across your hardened nipples, toying at them, getting you all hot and bothered. 
You moan so subtly that Jeongguk thinks it might be his favourite sound in the whole entire world. 
"You wanted specifics earlier," Jeongguk says under his breath. "I can give you a specific."
You nod. Trail along his bottom lip with your thumb. Let him press his lips down against it. 
"Show me," you tell him. He squeezes at your chest. You know exactly what he wants. You also know he's never done it before. "My tits, huh? You wanna suck on them?"
He swallows harshly. Rests his forehead against yours. Nods. Can feel his cock throb. 
"Big boy words," you whisper, and are met with a slight grunt from Jeongguk. He's used to being the one in your position. Used to setting the pace, setting the tone. You switching it back around on him? Fuck. He might just die. Or cum in his pants. One of the two. Death would be preferable. "Tell me what you want."
He rests his head on your shoulder. Looks at your tits as he plays with them. 
"Not much of a teller. More of a doer."
He's just trying to weasel his way out of it. It's like the birds all over again.
"So do it."
And to your surprise, he does.
His lips are firm as he presses a kiss around your nipple. Once, twice. A third time. Poutier and poutier with each kiss. He's delicate. Sincere. Doesn't wanna get it wrong.
"Feels good," you tell him, knowing he needs the reassurance. 
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," you smile. Tease at his hair as his lips wrap around you again. The way his lashes splay on his cheeks is art, you decide. "You've no idea how much I like this."
His lips kiss and kiss. It takes a little encouragement - "use your tongue a little. Yeah. Yeah, like that. It feels so good when you do that. Suck a little- oh fuck. Yes." - but it doesn't take long for him to gain confidence. Be a little bolder. He focuses on your reactions. Notices when your breath hitches everytime he runs his tongue around your nipple. When he kitten licks, too. But when he sucks? That's when the jackpot hits. 
Your body leans into his touch, hand resting on the back of his head. His name escapes your lips half a dozen times. When he switches to your other nipple? Half a dozen more.
His lips are direct and purposeful and they tug your nipple into his mouth, his moans vibrating around you.  Pulling away, Jeongguk wastes no time. Has your other nipple in his mouth almost immediately. Squeezes your tits together, nipples almost touching so he can swipe fast licks across them. Gets you mewling. Whining. Begging for more. 
And how can he refuse? 
His hand dips to your pussy. Toys with you over the lace, which is sodden with your arousal. He slides your underwear to the side, and says nothing, just continues sucking on your tits as he sinks a finger into you.
"Shit," you curse. The angle you're sitting at means he can't get too deep. Means he's hitting you in just the right spot, straight off the bat. He mumbles something, but you can't work it out. Just know there's no possible way he's an ass guy. Hasn't spent more than a second away from your tits since he first started peppering them in kisses. "Just like that."
Your head lulls back, and Jeongguk finally pulls away. "You good?"
He's met with the most satisfied laugh he thinks he's ever heard. "Is water wet?"
"Dunno," he grins. "But you are. Fuckin' soaked. God," he stares down at your pussy, stuffed with two of his fingers. "I fuckin' love this cunt."
You smirk. Roll your hips as well as you can in the position. He watches, transfixed by the way he's stretching you out even with just two fingers.
"My bed," he rasps. "Can we? I know I need to shower, but - fuck - I just gotta have you in my bed, B."
Truthfully, you're glad. There's something about post-gym Jeongguk that just really gets to you. You think it's the pheromones. Don't care to google it because you enjoy the mystery. 
You nod. "Probably for the best. You have to eat off of here."
He smirks. Withdraws from you. Says, "So?"
And then he licks his fucking fingers clean. Eyes on yours. One of his brows tweaks. Challenges you. 
"You underestimate how much I like eating pussy," he says, as he walks away, leaving you in a state of shock.
You think his departure is for dramatic effect. In reality, it's just so you don't see the Cheshire cat grin on his face, pleased with himself for what he just did. He knows it was hot - but he's smiling because he can't get over the way you taste. Fucking delicious.
That thing about torturing himself? Yeah. You might be right. 
Eating pussy isn't on the birds. He knows he can't have it - and yet when you arrive at his door, mouth still ajar, both smug and surprised in the same expression, he thinks it might not be unfathomable. 
"What?" he feigns innocence - but he's got a grin that tells the tale of a valiant hero. He's so pleased with himself that you almost slip back into your 'normal' selves again - but then you crawl onto his bed. All fours. Ass a little red from his hands earlier, but no bruises. Just that barely there thong he thinks belongs in a museum, and evidence of just how turned on you are showing between your thighs.
The smile of his? Replaced with a stare so hard it rivals his cock. 
"What?" you feign innocence now, as you flop down onto his bed - and then he gets the luxury of seeing your tits and - fuck. It's all too much. 
He walks over to the bed. Takes off his underwear. You do the same.
"I'm gonna die," he tells you with absolute certainty. He's so ridiculous that you can't help but smile all fondly at him. The way he jokes and banters with you comes so easily, that part of you doesn't even realise he's naked. Part of you does, though. Mainly your eyes, given the fact they seem to be transfixed on his cock. "If we don't do something about this-" he gestures down to his cock, as if you need any direction "- then I absolutely will just die. Is that what you want? Huh?" 
"Mhmm," you hum, finishing it with a small giggle and a nod, reaching for his hand to pull him onto his bed. He lets you. Follows your lead, cause he hopes it's leading him somewhere good. "I want you dying a very little death."
The innuendo dances off your tongue and into his ear as you sit on his lap. His hands automatically find your chest. He decides he'll miss them. Encourages your body down. Positions you just right so that he can take your tits in his mouth again. He's a changed man.
"Don't think there'll be any little about it," he mumbles as he switches sides, kitten licking now so that he can finish his sentence. "Think it's gonna be a very big death, actually."
"Shit," you whisper as he gets reacquainted with your body. He decides all rather quickly that tits are a gift from God and he's been blind for his entire life up until he met you. How had he not been utterly obsessed before? He'll never admit it. Never. Will prevail as an ass guy - but fuck, he hopes whoever you set him up with has a good pair of tits.
But then there's an uncomfortable awareness of how fleeting this all is. By the time you've both finished, it'll all be over. 
He manoeuvres you both over. Kisses your chest, now. Works his way up to your collarbone. Your neck. Bites down ever so gently. Kisses again. Tells you once more how your no-kissing rule 'will kill' him. 
"Better leave me something nice in your will," you tease as he finally pulls away from dappling your skin in pretty kisses that you wished could have been on your lips instead. Either pair. 
He sits back on his heels. Strokes his cock as he looks at you. Tilts his head, a smirk rising on one side as you cup your tits. 
"Pussy," he encourages, pulling a little tighter on his cock. "Play with your pussy."
You give him a quizzical look, but do as you're told. Slide your fingers between your slick folds. Spread yourself for him. Watch as he almost fucking hisses. The pace he's wanking himself off increases. His breathing shallows. You think it stops completely when you sink two fingers into your entrance.
He curses. Tilts his head back. Ruts his hips upwards. Forces his cock through the tight grip of his hand. There's a sheen to his tip, precum leaking so delicately that you find yourself salivating at the sight of it. The muscles in his lower abdomen tense. He's edging himself. 
"How many birds do we have left?" Jeongguk rasps, eyes opening to find yours again. The way he speaks, all breathless and needy, has you wanting more. "Mutal masturbation's done. I can't... Shit. I can't. I'll cum if I carry on. Tits are done. Fingers, done. What else?"
"Shower," you say, then follow it up with. "Do that last. Water gets in the way. Wanna watch you cum."
"Shit, don't say shit like that," he mewls as he sinks down on top of you. His body is warm, the chain around his neck catching on your throat, pooling between your collarbones. Has you determined to make him finish on your chest. Wanna replace his chain with his cum. 
In a normal scenario, he'd kiss you right now - but he can't. Instead, he averts his desire. Grips his cock. Presses it against your folds. Spreads your slickness. Covers himself in it. Dips down a little too far. Curses. Gets you whining. 
"You know," he husks against your neck. "We could..."
"Cockwarm?" You simper. "Don't believe that one was my bird?"
The crown of his cock presses against you. Jeongguk holds it as the base, and runs it down your folds, then back again. He repeats. Lets his grip get even tighter when he lines up with your entrance. He waits for you to move your hips.
And you do. Just for a moment. Just a tad. Just enough.
"Wasn't it?" He hums, knowing perfectly well it was one of his.
"Don't even think it was a bird," you whisper a little breathlessly as he presses a little deeper against you. He adjusts his hips. Lines himself up a little better. Your breath hitches.
"So you don't want to?" He asks, and you can just tell he's got one of those smiles on his lips. The one that makes you think maybe kissing him wouldn't be so bad. "'Cause I wanna."
"Gguk," you whisper. He shakes his head.
"Not an answer."
"Shit," you whimper, rolling your hips ever so gently to encourage his tepid ruts against you. "Condom?"
"Birth control?" he chances. He knows you're on it. Think if he's gonna get his cock in you, then he's gonna at least try for it raw.
You know you should, and yet - "Are you clean?"
He nods. Asks the same back. You nod. Haven't hooked up with anyone but him since your last test.
Everything is out in the open. There's nothing to lose - just the knowledge that you'll maybe never get this ever again. It only serves to make you want him raw even more.
"You get a minute."
He pauses. "A minute?"
"Sixty seconds," you nod. "Cockwarming. That's all you get."
It's ridiculous, 'cause all you want is for Jeongguk to fuck you senseless. Think it's embarrassing admitting that, though. What if he doesn't actually want to fuck you? What if it's just for the birds?
"Who's counting?" He husks. Realigns himself. Presses the tip of his cock against your entrance. Plugs it but doesn't push forward. Makes you wanna die. Too good. Too fuckin' good.
"You are," you whimper, knowing you won't be able to keep count when he's inside you.
He nods. Reminds you that 'chess' is always an option.
His cock sinks into you slowly. It's thick and wide, angled just right to hit your sweetest spots. Jeongguk groans. Finds himself seeking out your tits with his mouth as he bottoms out. Sucks gently, until he's reminded by you that he needs to be keeping count.
He grins. Nibbles your nipple ever so gently, then nods. "You're right, you're right. Sorry. Shit. One. Two..."
Jeongguk finds solace in the crook of your neck as your legs wrap around him. The position has him thinking you've no right to ever complain about intimacy again. This is about as fucking intimate as it gets. And when your arms wrap around his neck? Dainty fingers start toying with his hair? Only amplifies it.
Your hips move ever so tenderly, and he loses count. Finds himself swearing again. You're tight and warm around him, just how he wanted it. Torture. Fucking torture. He likes this so much he fears you ruined actual sex for him.
"Shit," he mumbles against you. "Never been good at maths."
The way you giggle? Torture. Again. 
"You're a liar, Jeon Jeongguk," you whisper tenderly, tensing around him just cause you liked the way it made him whine.
He pouts and shakes his head, which is still buried in the crook of your neck. His voice is muffled as he asks, "What comes after 32?"
And because you're just as into it as he is, you decide lying is okay for the time being. "11."
"Yeah," he whines. "Thought so. Eleven... Twelve... What's next?"
"Dunno," you whimper breathlessly. It's getting a bit too much for you, too. "Maybe ten?"
"Ten," he echoes. Decides he wants to spend eternity inside you. "Eleven..."
He pauses just long enough for you to know exactly where he's going with this - so you beat him to it.
"Maybe it would be easier if you had a rhythm going?" you simper. 
"A rhythm?" He hums. He was just gonna pretend he couldn't do maths again.
"Like..." you pull your hips back a little, burying yourself deeper into the mattress and away from him - but then you push them back up. Jeongguk fucking whines. "One." 
You pull back, again. Jeongguk whines, again. Sinks himself back into you. "Shit. Two."
"I'm not good at multitasking," he says. Not a lie, admittedly. Gets distracted too easily. If you don't keep count, he'll just fuck you forever or something stupid like that. Doesn't think he'd mind it, to be honest. "Maybe you should keep count."
"Mhmm? You want me to count for you?"
"Yeah," he nods. "Count for me, B. Make sure I don't go over sixty."
"I'll count backwards," you tell him, thinking it will somehow take longer, because apparently all sense of sanity is evading you. Unsurprising. All you can think about is Jeongguk's fat cock and how it's keeping you spread open nice and wide for him. "Countdown." 
"60-0?" He clarifies, to which you nod. "Mhm. Do that. Count backwards. Use that pretty little head of yours."
"Sixty..."
The way he pulls out of you is maddeningly slow. He's deliberating taking his time. Overindulging. Making this last. He's even slower as he pushes back in, filling you up as deep as he possibly can.
You're barely able to get the next number out.
"Fifty-nine," you eventually manage as he bottoms out. "Fuck."
He's lethargic in the way he moves. Slow as he withdraws, and even slower still as he fucks himself into you.
"Fifty-eight..."
Jeongguk's skin is hot. He sticks to you like glue. Only his hips move - but so do yours. 
You're fucking. 
You. Are. Fucking.
And, God, you know you shouldn't. You know that it's a recipe for disaster, but Jeongguk's aftershave smells like safety and his bed feels like home, so the prospect isn't scary. 
"...Forty-two... Forty-one..."
Your whines are getting louder. So are his grunts. You grip onto his biceps, and begin to realise Jeon Jeongguk is not a man. He simply cannot be. Not when he is built like a Greek God, and looks like one too. Crafted from marble, there's no possibility he's real. 
And even if he is real, you think there's no way he'd actually be fucking himself into you like he is. 
Sex, at its very basic fundamental value, is all about survival of the fittest. Anatomy. Breeding. Shit like that; things you can't quite recall when he's balls deep inside you. It's about fucking for the survival of the human race, and out of everyone on the planet, you can't wrap your head around the fact he'd choose to do that with you. His basic anatomy would choose you . 
Jeongguk isn't thinking as intensely as you are. 
Fucking. Nice feeling. Cum. Nice. Inside her. Nice. Fucking. Real nice. Glitter. Nice. Tits. Suck. Nice. More. Fuck. Nice. Again? Nice.
But he is also thinking about spilling himself into you, and how fucking unreal it would feel. 
So maybe your brains are working in tandem. Different process. Same end goal. He just can believe he'd choose you, 'cause, well... he already has.
Eventually, you hit thirty-three, then thirty-two, and then -
"Shit," you whine. "That damn thirty-two."
"What about it?" He asks a little curiously. Pauses his hips until he gets the go-ahead from you again.
"I've forgotten what comes after it."
"Shit," he grins, playing along with you. "Start again?"
"Maybe," you nod. "But this time, maybe go faster? Might jog my memory?"
Jeongguk smirks. Sits up on his heels, cock still buried inside you, knees on either side of your ass. He grips your waist. Spanks one of your tits, then softly caresses it as an apology for letting the intrusive thought win. His hips pulse gently. 
He's fucking you. 
Jeongguk is fucking you. 
He lets the hand that was playing with your chest trail down your torso until it reaches your pussy. It's swollen and needy, just as much blood rushing to your clit as there is to his cock. His thumb presses down right when it needs to. Rubs in tiny circles as he gently thrusts into you slowly.
"Faster?"
You nod.
"Okay," he rasps. "Let's jog that memory of yours. You're so smart, Byeol. Look at you, and your pretty little head. So smart. So fucking smart when my cock's inside you."
This time you don't count. He grips your waist. Rams himself into you like a man possessed, lips resting ajar as his brows knit together all prettily like they did when he was eating brunch. So incredibly focused, and yet there's not a single thought up in that gorgeous head of his, just that he's fucking you so hard his neighbour will definitely be able to hear his bedframe hitting the wall. Good .
The noises he makes are lewd. You think he'd make bank with an only fans. Know that you'd pay good money for it. With a cock as pretty as his? A body like a marble statue? Gorgeous little whimpers when his cock is all needy for you? Yeah, bitches would go wild for him. 
Funny, how you refer to them as bitches, almost like you're jealous over imaginary women who'd find him sexy. Very strange, indeed. 
After all? You're just friends.
His pace eventually eases, and you pretend like you were counting the entire time. "Two... One... Times up."
Jeongguk sinks back down, hooking one of your legs over his elbow as he does so, opening you up even further. He wants to be deeper. As deep as he possibly can be. Wants to press down on your cute little tummy and feel himself inside you.
"Whoever fucks you next better worship your pussy," he mumbles, pressing kisses up your neck. "So fucking good. Shit. If you dare fuck another guy who doesn't make you cum like you know you deserve to cum-"
"You'll what?" you tease, a smile plastered all over your face. "Die?"
He laughs. Shakes his head. You know him so well. "What use would that be? Nah..."
Jeongguk pulls away from you again. Withdraws himself fully for the first time. Watches your pussy as your arousal seeps from your tight cunt and onto his sheets. Wants to lick it all up. Doesn't think he's allowed to, though.
Instead, he moves your legs, finally noticing the extra bruises from pole. You were right. They do look like watercolour bruises. 
He squeezes your thighs together and uses his gentle hands to twist your hips, so that your legs are curled to the side, but keeps your back flat against his bed. He lines himself up with you again. Grunts as he sinks into you. You're tighter now, like this. He thinks it's gonna make him cum. He has to go slow.
"I'd get you like this," he says, holding onto your hip and pushing deeper, deeper into you. He nods over to his desk and smirks. "And that chair over there? That's where they'd be. And they'd have to watch me fuck you how you like it."
He doesn't mean to, but he finds himself fixated on the fact you routinely have sex and don't finish. He can't wrap his head around it. He'd had the luxury of witnessing you cum a handful of times. Had felt it once. Knows first-hand how fucking good it is. Thinks about it as he fucks into you, now, then lets the intrusive thoughts win again as he begins to ramble.
"Can't believe how many people you've let get away without making you cum. You know how good that shit is? Fuck. You feel like heaven. They wouldn't even deserve to watch it - but I'd do it. I'd make them fuckin' watch - 'cause not being funny, B, but you should see yourself right now. So fucking hot I might die. Hopefully then if they fucked you again, they'd know what to do."
"Never realised you were such a good teacher, Mr Jeon," you tease.
He stills his cock inside you. Smirks. Shakes his head. Picks up the pace again.
You know what ' Jeon ' does to him. The ' Mr ' ahead of it? Yeah. Gets him.
And so gives you a friendly threat, as he fucks his cock a little deeper into your tight, warm cunt. "I will fuck you so hard my bed breaks if you don't shut the fuck up."
"Oh?" You grin, trying not to moan and failing miserably. "Would you prefer Sir ?"
"Final warning," he growls, his hips slowing but deepening. He's close. You know it's not gonna take much. 
"Whatcha gonna do? Give me a detention?"
"If you get to call me stupid fuckin' names, then I get to kiss you."
"Kissing isn't very friendly, is it?"
"Byeol, my cock is inside you."
"Yeah? Just a friendly fuck."
He knows you're joking, but Jeongguk doesn't think there's anything friendly about this.
He doesn't insist on kissing you any further.
"You're unbelievable," he smiles, easing slightly before reaching for your hand. "C'mon, let's make you cum."
"Oh? You want this to be over?" You flash a grin, as if you haven't been fucking him for God knows how long by this point, knowing full well he could have cum in 10 seconds flat at any given opportunity. He repeatedly edged himself for you.
"No, but if I don't cum soon, Byeol, I'll d-"
"Die, yeah yeah," you grin. "Alright. Put yourself out of your misery."
He laughs. Looks at you with such fondness that you think you'd quite like to orgasm on his cock for him like a good friend should. "You make me sound like such an asshole."
"I don't," you promise sweetly - before you also decide to let the intrusive thoughts win. "Also, just on the subject of assholes, thoughts on pegging?"
"Literally what the fuck is wrong with you," he laughs, rolling his hips to remind you of the more pressing things at hand. You moan a little, but all you wanna do is banter with him. You enjoy it. Like it when he's all hard and needy and impatient, and you're winding him up. You like frustrating him. 
"You've got a nice ass," you shrug, shoulders pressed deep down into his white sheets. You look angelic, he thinks, hair haloing around your head, chest flushed, tits covered in teeny tiny hickies from his mouth.
"Well, maybe if you'd have picked a different plane..." he teases. "You'd know by now."
Holy shit.
"Wait. You wanna get peg-"
Jeongguk covers your mouth with his hand, a subtle grin on his pretty little face, dewy nose scrunching just for you.
"As much as I enjoy your chitchat, Byeol, I'm gonna fuck you so hard you can't talk at all. That good?"
You laugh. Twist your torso over to reposition yourself on your front. He gives you a playful spank straight off the bat, and it makes you roll your eyes - as if you hadn't turned over just to give him a view of your ass. You'd known what you were getting yourself in for.
Adjusting you slightly, Jeongguk pulls one of his spare pillows over, and lifts your hips to scoot it beneath you. It's his favourite position. Every last part of it. The way he can pull on hair and spank asses? The muffled moans into his pillows? Fuck . 
You love it just as much. Always helps to have your body weight adding to the pressure of your fingers massaging against your cunt. As Jeongguk pushes into you, he watches your hand slip beneath your body, and curses. 
"That's it, B," he husks. "That's a good girl."
He fucks himself into you - slow, deep, hard - and picks up the pace with every pathetic moan that escapes your lips. Tells you how good you sound, how much he wants to hear you come undone - and then you are.
The pleasure waves through you like an electrical current, Jeongguk's thick cock unrelenting as he fucks into you and drags your high even further than you thought possible. There's a numbness to your body, save for the overwhelming pleasure that pulses around his cock. It's all you can feel. Everything else is void. For a moment, the only important thing in your life is Jeongguk's dick and the way it fills you like nothing else ever has.
"Shit," he husks. "B, where?"
"Back," you just say, unable to move because your body is still fucking shaking. You don't even get the chance to mourn the loss of his cock inside of you, because he has to pull out so quickly.
His hand grips his cock and wanks faster than the speed of light. The pressure in his balls builds and builds and then it can build no more.
He squeezes your ass and whines as thick, creamy spurts of cum begin to paint your back.
The sound of his grunting makes you moan with every new rope of cum emptied onto your skin, and Jeongguk's pretty sure nothing in Taehyung's 'passion' collection could even come close to the sight in front of him. 
The final drops are wasted on your ass cheek as Jeongguk holds it to the peachy flesh, watching the way he stains your skin. Holding his cock by its base, he spanks it against your ass once, twice. Smirks. Takes a moment to squeeze your ass just because he can. 
He fucked you. He knows he should be concerned about the friendship, but he's not reached post-nut clarity yet.
Eventually, he flops down beside you.
"You know," you mumble, eyes closed, a smile on your lips. Jeongguk's grin is so serene that it's a good job your eyes aren't open. You might accidentally get your feelings confused if you saw him look that pretty. "I actually think it's a bit mean setting these poor girls up with you."
"What? Why?"
He sounds genuinely affronted. You just smile harder.
"Well, it's a bit cruel, isn't it? Us pretending like they'll be dating some great guy, only for them to later find out you're really average in bed."
He knows you're joking. Knows that a fuck like that could never be described as average. Plays up to your teasing just because he finds it funny.
" Average ?!" He exclaims. You can hear his smile in his tone of voice. "Nah, you're chatting shit just to piss me off, Byeol. What is it, huh? Want me to fuck you again? Want me to remind you exactly how average I can be?"
"Maybe."
He grunts. "Call me when you can walk straight."
"Pass me my phone."
"Fuck off."
The afternoon descends into casual chaos. You shower together, and bicker over who gets to stand beneath the water for longer, then battle it out for Jeongguk's fluffy towel in the aftermath. In the end, he lets you have it - only 'cause he likes the way you oogle at him when he's naked. 
You dry your hair, and style Jeongguk's into pretty little French braids. Tell him that he has to keep it like that. He says he will. By the time Jimin gets home, you're just sitting on the sofa watching shite TV. He's none the wiser you were naked on his kitchen counter a few hours earlier. Probably is best he never finds out about that part.
He studies Jeongguk's hair for a moment, then shrugs. "Suits you. What have you guys been up to?"
Good fucking question. 
"Not much," Jeongguk hums. "Gym this morning. Met this one -" he pokes you with his foot, earning a grimace from you. "- Afterwards for coffee. Been stuck to me like a bad smell ever since."
Jimin laughs. Shakes he his head as he comes to sit by you both with a box of dry cereal that he's eating straight from the bag. 
"You've got the most sensitive nose known to man," Jimin teases. "If you've kept her around, it's cause she smells good."
"Nah," he begs to differ. "Just gone nose blind."
"Prick," you laugh, then ask Jimin about his day. 
Conversation takes place of the shitty TV show, the three of you easily finding a million different topics to talk about.
It's times like this you regret ever fucking Jimin. Part of you fears you'll always just be 'the girl Jimin fucked that one time'. No identity within Jeongguk's friendship group beyond the fact you shagged his mate.
It's stupid. They barely remember Jimin even so much as looked in your direction. You're Jeongguk's friend. Jeongguk's.
Funny how you don't seem to mind being reduced to no identity outside of the confines of Jeongguk. Did you really heal after Seokjin? Or are you just making even worse decisions than you used to?
Thing is, Jeongguk's friends would be right in thinking that of you. 
You are his friend. 
As you head off into town the next morning to arrange his blind date, you know that's all you'll ever be.
And somehow, you think you're okay with that. 
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Would it possible if you can write a Lost boys(poly if your comfy with it) with a Carrie!Reader (2013 ver) who like, is bullied severely at school, crappy parents and discovers they have telekinesis. they run into the lost boys on the boardwalk, hangs out with them and stuff? But they don’t tell them the bullying or anything about their home life because reasons(make some up if you want lol) or their powers until they run into their bullies in a empty part of the beach and they terrorize them and they snap? And the boys watch and fall in love and kick their feet and twirl their hair? David wants them to turn now even more (falling in love aside) because ✨Power✨ Dwayne wants them because ✨Safety✨ Paul wants them to turn because ✨Sexy✨ and Marko because ✨Crazy✨. Basically their dream girl who is as soft as silk but a lil fucked up?🥺🥺🥺
Also how’s your day been? How you living? You drink water today?
Hi! Yes, this would absolutely be possible! First off, I have to say, I am so sorry for the incredibly long wait. I was busy with work (multiple jobs and only 7 days a week aren't an easy thing to combine with free time), and I prioritised finishing Changes. But now that Changes is finished and all the chapters are written, I finally have time for this request because I've read this several times now and I just think it is so much fun! Anyway, I hope you'll forgive me for not writing this sooner and that you like what I've written! Have a nice day/night/holidays!💜
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The alley was silent. Three bodies laid on the ground, blood splattered everywhere from the ground to the walls on both sides. One body, a female no older than twenty, came without a head. Or at least, it used to have a head, but what was left of it was barely recognisable as such. There were two male bodies, one twisted and turned as if it were moulded in clay, the other drained as if all liquid inside the body spontaneously decided to evaporate.
Needless to say, it was a mess.
I stood between those three bodies, not knowing what to do. In all honesty, I was still not entirely sure about what happened. One second, they began to call me names - again, like they always did - and the second I felt my anger flare up and poof - there they were gone. Dead. I shook my head as I stared at the blood, unable to keep a single tear from falling down my face.
I blinked, a small frown on my forehead. I was terrified. Not of what scene laid before me, but because of what had happened. I had done this, and I didn't know how. I had killed them, somehow.
"That's quite a mess."
I jumped, turning around. My heart was beating in my throat as I saw David, Marko, Paul, and Dwayne standing behind me. I frowned slightly. It was the closed off side of the alley, so if they'd walked past me, I would have noticed it, right?
"We flew," was Dwaynes answer to my questioning look. I nodded, remembering how they'd told me what they were a while ago.
I had known the boys for quite some time now, running into them once while they were in the videostore. Marko had just grabbed the tape I wanted, talking - well, there's no other way to put it - shit about it. When I had asked for the tape, he had refused to give it to me, instead opting to give me a better alternative. He had been right. Where I had initially wanted to see a B movie called Zombies from Mars, he had given me Return of the Living Dead. It was awesome. The next night, I searched for them on the boardwalk to thank him for the suggestion, and they invited me to hang out with them. Ever since I did so, every night, whenever I could. I told them everything, I was closer to them than anyone else I knew. Well, everything - i couldn't help but chew the inside of my cheek. I had never told them about being bullied. It felt silly when I hung out with them. It was silly when I could deal with it. It was calling names, being pushed into the showers, locked inside rooms, and losing my lunch sometimes - it could have been worse. Some other kids in school were bullied worse, and they didn't complain, so why would I?
"What happened here?" Paul asked as he looked at the bodies.
"I don't know," I said quietly, my voice weaker than I'd liked, "I got angry and then they were just like that."
"They bothered you?" Marko gave me a pointed look, and I knew that I had no choice but to be truthful now.
"They bullied me."
"Bullied? Why did you never say anything?"
"I don't know," I shrugged, not looking at Marko, "it felt silly, and I could handle it."
"Yeah, that much is obvious," David answered, a sly grin on his face. "Has this ever happened before?"
I shook my head. "It scares me. I just killed three people and didn't even notice it."
"Just a regular night for us, am I right?" Paul chuckled, earning himself some glares. "Sure, it's a shock that it happened, but honestly, Babe," he grinned, "it is kind of hot."
"I killed someone, Paul."
"So? We do too."
"And you're certain you've never done anything like this before?" Marko asked, and once again, I shook my head.
"If you can do this without practice..."
"Practice? This was an accident, I don't even know how it happened or -"
I stopped when I felt myself panic, and slowly but surely, I saw the droplets of blood rising from the ground, floating in the air. I stared at it with wide eyes. "Am I doing this?"
"Yeah," Dwayne appeared behind me, taking my hand in his. "Calm down, alright? You're fine, and you're going to stay fine."
"I don't understand..."
"You're telekinetic," Marko grinned, "you could burn this whole town to the ground if you wanted without lifting a single finger."
"I- I don't think I want that?"
"But you could!"
I couldn't help but smile a watery smile at that. "Why are you four not freaked out?"
"Vampire." Was all David said as he looked at me. "Which you could still become, the offers still up."
"I don't know..."
"As a vampire it would be easier to control your powers."
"And we'd be able to keep you safer if they get out of control."
I sighed, looking between David and Dwayne, not knowing what to do.
"But what if I loose control and hurt you? Any of you?"
"You won't," Marko answered, "besides, I never shied away from a bit of pain."
I blushed, shaking my head. "You're incorrigible."
"You know it," he grinned. "You should go home, well clean this up for you."
"I- i can't really go back home, my parents, they are eh-"
"I meant the cave."
"What?" I frowned, looking at Marko and then at Paul and the others.
"You'll live with us," Paul said simply, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"You're one of us," David said, his voice holding more kindness than I'd heard before, "so come with us."
I smiled softly, nodding as I let David and Dwayne lead me away from the crime scene. Paul and Marko stayed behind, cleaning up the bodies and the blood, neither of them minding the sight of it.
"Pretty damn cool, this power of theirs," Marko grinned, as he swept some brain matter off the wall.
"Definitely. Makes you wonder what else they could do with this gift," he chuckled with a smirk, causing Marko to roll his eyes.
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woozingie · 2 months ago
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17:17
pairing: woozi x afab!reader genre: domestic fluff! word count: girl idk i wrote the whole thing on tumblr like a madwoman (again) content warning: mentions of sex, mentions of menstrual cycle, mentions of plans for BABIES, mentions of money management (shudders) lil note: i am currently coming down with yeonjunitis so i am fighting it off with little woozing stories in my head + i made raspberry choco cookies and vegan chocolate cake this afternoon and they're a banger so let's fight off yeonjunitis
"i made cookies," you announce with a single serving plate in one hand and a cup of tea in the other. it's not like woozi didn't hear or smell the cookies coming to life, but the sentence rolls off your tongue as you proudly present your boyfriend with his afternoon tea. he does not look up from the screen but his enthusiasm is sincere when he answers: "nice", he lets out, eyebrows still furrowed in concentration.
you go back to the kitchen to bring your own cup and plate and finally settle down at the dining table next to the busy man. it's nice to have him home, even if he is off doing his own thing. his presence, the little sounds he makes, talking to each other from one room to the other, giving him control of the sound system in the living room and suffering bruno mars on loop; in a relationship doomed to follow his strict rockstar schedule, the little pleasures are priceless. even sunday afternoons spent pouring over your household finances.
"how much was the stand mixer again?" woozi sighs. the look he gives you is half mental fatigue, half accusatory, so when his hand moves in the direction of his homemade cookie, you playfully give it a slap. "who cares, it's already profitable! if you eat from the stand mixer, you must respect the stand mixer." an eye roll and a smirk are the end of that could-have-been argument. "plus," you add, "aren't you like... proper rich? remind me why we're balancing the books when we could be playing video games? watching a movie? working out? having sex? ...napping?"
now you are casting doubt on the whole operation in jihoon's mind. he tentatively half-closes his laptop, stares at the steam coming out of his cup of tea before closing his eyes with a sigh. "everyone should keep up with their spending. if we want to buy a house, we need to be aware of how much we can afford to spend-"
"we could be napping? and/or having sex? remember?" you barely hold your laughter when jihoon closes his eyes and sighs again at your insistence. you know you are weakening his resolve. but this isn't your first time having this exact conversation, and he comes prepared. hot drink in hand, he argues: "what if we buy a house irresponsibly and there's no money left to have a baby? what if i need to keep working a lot to make enough money to pay for all the baby stuff? what's the point of having kids if i'm never there to see them and take care of them? where's the love in forcing you to be a stay at home mother?"
that usually is the point where you fold and take the receipts out of your purse. after seven years of perseverance, patience and devotion, your maternal instincts are getting out of hand and surprisingly, jihoon's apathy towards children has turned into the shy confession of a growing desire to turn your loving dynamic into a little nest for a brand new person. your fingers softly caress his empty hand, heart bursting at the thought of baby yous and baby jihoons running around. but your lover is unaware of your cycle overriding your rational brain this time around. "where's the love in counting money when we could be practicing baby making? my darling? my love? my genius composer? angel voice? and then have a cheeky nap after?" woozi's serious face falls as he laughs, his eyes forming perfect little crescents, the high-pitched sound of his laughter somehow only making your desire more urgent. it's funny the mundane things that turn you on once you know someone so well you've helped them get boogers out of their nostrils.
"yeah okay, i see where you're coming from," still amused, he feigns deep thought, eyebrows reaching for his hairline, pouting as if to say, 'impressive work'. he quickly bites the last of his cookie and gulps down his cup of tea as he stands up, holding the hand that was caressing his to invite you on your merry way to the bedroom.
"wait!" you stop him dead in his tracks. confused, he turns around and looks on as you reach for your phone on the table. "we need to set a timer, i've got a cake in the oven as well." he spits what's left of tea in his mouth and folds in the middle, holding his stomach with one arm: he is in stitches. it's your turn to feign emotion, and you choose outrage at his lack of trust in your financial decisions. "i told you we were making profits from this bloody stand mixer!"
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missmarveledsblog · 5 months ago
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The one ( Bucky barnes x reader odindotter)
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summary : just the grumpy teddy bear bucky pinning after thor sister that's been there through everything  
warning: none , Bucky being a cutie , John walker being an ass , sam being the best wing man , mutual pining
One person , one singular person was all he wanted to see after it all . after the blip , the war against the mad tyrant and yet he was now staring at the face of a man he loathed , one who didn't deserve to hold the shield his best friend and brother had for a century. John walker stood an ego based attention hog who had the wrong morals and ideal that steve would generally cringe at . even with all this their was one person that occupied his mind , one that could truly make sense of all the craziness that he was now landed in. He walked as johns chest puffed out appearing to make himself so much bigger that he was , the words spilling from his mouth all bullshit and that thing he pass of as charm well a bag of rocks could do better and possibility even smarter . Bucky came to see her , knowing she was the only one that could truly understand what it is like to be in a place so alien and having those feeling of they didn't feel they belong in a sense. She could of been in new asgard with the rest of her people but she like this strange place. What made it funnier was he was actually of this planet and same time if someone told him it was mar or some shit he would actually believe them because still even after everything this didn't feel like earth . He watched her pretending to care , even the scowl of annoyance that grace her face that would of had loki proud. "So i think that why cardio is so important" john finished off the suggestable comment . " you know my brother would love to hear stuff like this" she smiled letting the poor mans hope rise. " although i find it all a bit boring more into the intellect of everything" her head tilted she had the man like a mouse on a string . " i mean yeah science of things but at the end of the day brawn defeat the brain" he chuckled . " i'm a goddess your brawn wouldn't tire me nor my brain" she rolled her eyes clearly done with the conversation scanning the room . " i bet i could tire you out" he winked . " the only way you could tire me out is too keep talking because it kinda putting me asleep" she fake a yawn before adding the stretching her arms to prove her point . " wow you really add to the bitchy princess stereotype" he scoffed. " oh little man i made it" she walked off eyes lighting up when she saw the man before her . " finally someone interesting" she called making the other man scoff.
It wasn't her intention to be bitchy maybe it was having loki as a big brother or the fact the man before her didn't know his ass from his elbow and yet he held something so important in his hands. She could of kept walking , ignored it and she was going to til his mouth opened once more. " really the killer" that sentence that made the fires of hel seem small to how it made her feel. " excuse me you back of the warehouse version of captain america , you wouldn't know the real downfall of earth or it's people . you hold that shield yet don't know one thing it represents nor the man that held it before you and yet you try cast you opinions on someone who went through so much and still stand before us today , if my father was alive he would agree that not one of us would have the same kind of heart and fight if we went through what that man has went through , all that pain and torture that would break you in a click of a finger" she snapped. " doll seriously it's ok" bucky said although someone should told his face with the smile having her defending him . " jame buchanan barnes and many other saved this whole universe and you dare try insult him , that shows you don't deserve that title you parade" she scoffed leaving john walker standing almost speechless . " hey little princess" sam called cutting bucky from speaking. " hello shall we leave or midgard will need a new captain" she smiled brightly . " actually we need your help" sam winked . " i feel like i should say no but lets go" she chuckled .
She sat on the ledge of helicopter watching the idiot well her favourite idiot fall to the ground and sam following after liking the new and improved wings. " you gonna jump out now?" torrez asked in awe and well slightly nervous giving who the woman is before him. " nah idiots forget i could of teleported us" she giggle before she was gone from his sight. Leaning over bucky as he lay out on the ground . " that was very stupid" she smiled holding her hand out. " well i mean i got down didn't i" he smirked back up at her. " your an old man it's quite dangerous" she laughed . " how old are you again" he shot back. " times different i mean in earth human years i'm only what twenty five" she tapped her chin . " wait so how old was loki when you know tried taking over earth " sam came to their side. " earth years sixteen" she walked off causing sam mouth to get louder at the new found knowledge . " your telling me grown ass loki , destroying new york with his alien ass army was 16 earth years old " . " yeah i mean time was something that many asgardians had to get use to being here" she shrugged. " i like it better when you where the thousand year old princess" bucky teased. " so you didn't feel like a creep my little pinning buck" sam whispered she heard it yet kept walking pretending to be oblivious to sam's constant teasing . " no but seriously loki was sixteen" sam asked making her roll her eyes . which led to her spending the rest of the time trying to explain the time differences and space and time which was probably a waste of her time as he began asking to convert their fellow avengers ages to asgardian . which then she used to tease him then turning it around. " so would it make you feel better after losing to parker" she smirked watching his face fall. " we didn't lose" bucky spoke up . " yeah redwing came in" sam added. " so redwing did, what you couldn't" she smiled. " no no now don't spin this" sam huffed. " well i mean you're so concerned with ages" she smiled. " here's me thinking you were sweet and soft like thor but your like loki" sam chuckled . " i mean me and loki did get to chat a lot , great teacher glad he left something behind " she smiled softly as sam realised his words . " shit i didn't , sorry really y/n" he began rambling . " it's ok really lets get going" she walked ahead only for bucky to slap sam at the back of the head. " bird brain, and stop with the remarks she finds out i love her well i'm screwed i love my best girl " he hissed.
Even after all this time it was so hard , so stressful and completely heartbreaking to even think of her brother . loki and thor was all she had after her parents life had perished and granted she still have thor but through everything knowing once and for all that loki was truly gone , well sometimes it can take longer for a heart to heal after so much loss especially when your not fully over the others before it. The rest of the trip it was like she was somewhere else from the taunts of zemo to the fake disguise of the winter soldier it seemed as though the whole thing was getting worse bringing back scars for them all to the surface. All mentally dealing with something that was bigger then themselves . all dealing with pressures or ghost of their own past . he could see in her eyes thinking of all they lost , close friends and family behind the eyes he could stare into all day . she been around through it all , from when steve found him the first and second time . the day he pulled him from the river when she promised to take care of steve , through the battle of the airport, on the run while he was in wakanda she stayed learning how they did it and being the friend he needed. To the war how she held them all up loss after loss , she lived through the blip trying to find a way to get them back , a way to stop the mad tyrant and he wonder in that time was he on her mind like she would of been on his if the role were reversed. She would give her all for those she loved and still felt like she needed to give more it was another reason to add to that ever growing list of why he loved her .
Then now here they were louisiana celebrating the new captain america , the right choice , the one he couldn't agreed more not that he would admit that out loud . although he wish sam would shut up about y/n odinsdottir . he didn't want to scare her off being his friend , the whole time when everything was wrapped up in a bow it's all the new cap could bring up . he watched her laugh and play with the children , how even thought the sun was shining her smile was even brighter . " you know instead of still doing the whole mean steamy stare you could actually do something about it" sam nudged him playfully as sarah looked to the two. " oh if you don't i will" she winked . then the laugh got louder as he watched her walking towards him eyes locked on his and that damn smile that made him melt like a puddle. Her hand coming to his face , cupping his cheeks before her lips on his . " you know i can hear you both no matter how much you whisper" she winked turning to walk off only to feel his hand to wrap in her pulling her flush to his chest . " and you left it til now cruel doll" he smirked leaning forward . " hey girl can only wait so long plus again it's not like i didn't give you chances all these years " batting her lashes leaning up to kiss him once more only for clash of thunder shot through the sky making them jump apart. " he got the girl , my man buck nasty got the girl" sam cheered . " he always had the girl" she kissed him once . the one he wanted to see the most was truly and finally his ,his peace and his girl. 
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pubbamoon · 6 months ago
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Natal placements that can indicate homosexuality
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So, this observation will be about the possible indicators of someone being gay, bisexual, transsexual or any other part of a LGBTQIA+ community. Keep in mind that these placements I'll mentioned in this post don't automatically mean being homosexual or whatever has to do with this community, but at the other hand, it's a common case. If you're homophobic or don't support LGBTQIA+ community, then this post may not be for you, hahaha. Sorry not sorry.
Uranus/Neptune aspecting Sun/Moon/Venus/Mars
Uranus represents unconventionality, something that is not usual to see and even homosexuality, while Neptune represents illusions, fluidity and something hidden. Having Uranus or Neptune aspecting inner planets, especially Venus and Mars which are considered as sexual planets, can represent being attracted to something unusual and out of the norm or being sexually fluid.
Venus/Mars in Aquarius/Gemini/Pisces
Like I said, Venus and Mars are sexual planets and both of them represent who you're attracted to, depending of your gender. Aquarius is an unconventional sign, which indicates being attracted to something that is called 'weird'. Gemini and Pisces are mutable signs and having Venus or Mars in these signs can indicate being open, adaptable and explorative in your love life and with your sexuality as well.
Planets in the 4th/8th/12th house
Almost every planet can apply to this placement, but I'll give a priority to inner planets (Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus and Mars). Planets in this houses, especially in the 8th house ('cause this is a sexual house which basically represents sex) means that there's something that native may hide from everyone else and that could the native's sexuality.
Mercury/Uranus/Neptune in the 5th/7th house
5th house is about dating, sex, romance and short-term relationships, while 7th house is related to marriage, partnerships, what attracts us and long-term relationships. Mercury is a gender neutral planet, so you can attract almost everyone with this placement. Uranus in these houses might indicate homosexuality, while Neptune here can be an indicator of a sexually fluid native.
Mars in Cancer (mostly for men)
Mars is a masculine planet which represents war, aggression and taking action, while Cancer is a very sensitive sign. Mars is in fall in Cancer, which may be one of the worst placements for this planet possible. Men with Cancer Mars might not express their masculine side easily and when they do that, it doesn't seem persuasively.
Venus in Virgo (mostly for women)
Venus is a feminine planet which represents love, pleasure and aesthetics, while Virgo is an analytical and hard-working sign which doesn't have time for pleasure. Venus is also in fall in Virgo, meaning that Venus doesn't feel comfortable in Virgo at all. Women with Virgo Venus might struggle with expressing their femininity and it makes them hard to realize which person they're attracted to. Virgo is also a mutable sign, which tells a lot.
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Well, I think that would be everything for today. What do you think about this post? Do you agree with why I just wrote down. I hope you won't find this observation offensive and that you'll accept this post with an open mind and with an open heart of yours. I guess I was supposed to post this kind of stuff last month, but who cares anyway. But nonetheless, have a good time. Share love and support, 'cause that's something that we need nowadays. See you soon!
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morallysuperiorlips · 4 months ago
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How I Come Up With Compelling and Fun Characters!
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Back at you again with another TedTalk.
Coming up with well-rounded characters is my favorite part of the writing process. I like to come up with convoluted plots, so ofc convoluted characters have to follow. While I am someone who is VERY guilty of injecting my own traits/experiences into my characters (because I like to live vicariously through them or use them to cope don't @ me), I try to do that once I've established them as their own people. Because then they just end up being other versions of me, and we don't want that trust me
The adage I like to live by is "when the character feels real to you, they'll feel real to the reader," so I try to go out of my way to know as much as I can about them before I start to put them down on paper.
I know full names, birthdays (down to the hour), exact heights, blood types, favorite colors, foods, etc. and I try to know most of the surface-level things. I'll try to delve a little deeper but I do like to let my characters breathe when I'm writing them because sometimes they do things that make me stare into the camera like I'm on the Office and I want to give them the room to do so because that's like 60% of the process (in my humblest of opinions as a self-taught/ professional hybrid)
When I first started writing my novel, I could tell you off the top of my head that my protagonist, Odette Harmonie Cinq-Mars, was born in the little fictional town of Pendulum Province, France on December 14th, 1997 at 8:16pm, her blood type is AB+, she's 5'0, she's left-handed, and her favorite color is royal purple. I could also tell you she has anger issues, is hyper-observant, is a classically trained singer and dancer, and is kind of cold as a person. That last trait ended up writing most of itself out as she developed, but it's how she started, and I never got much deeper than that until I wrote her.
But, rewinding a little bit, I like to come up with ideas for my characters from tropes and stereotypes. My truest formula for coming up with characters is:
Trope/Archetype
- Some tropey traits
+ Traits you might not normally see in that trope/archetype
+ As many details as possible
+ Putting them in random situations that come to mind and watching them figure it out (even if it might be unrelated to the plot)
+ A little bit of yourself (always optional)
For example:
My "tropiest" character's name is Noel Masse; he was heavily based on the archetype of the peacocky gay theater kid who kinda has a hoe streak. Before you come for my neck, hear me out.
What are traits of this trope I could erase (or heavily modify) for him? From my experience theater kids get kinda cliquey--not all, but some--Noel has his friends, but he's the type who wants to be friends with everyone. He doesn't like to judge unless people give him a reason to. Theater kids might have their heads in the clouds all the time, and Noel airs on the side of keeping himself grounded when he needs to.
What are some odd traits I could add to him? What can I expand on? Noel has severe indecision--he's a theater kid who doesn't know if he wants to be theater kid. He has dedicated his life to being a musical theater star, but he has a calling in mystery solving, coding, and all things tech. This indecision often cripples him, and even seeps into his love life, which leads to some promiscuity~
What are the little details I know about Noel? Noel Coretyn Masse is a natural born witch, born in a little (fictional) city in France called Athamera on September 9th, 1997 at 12:11am. He is 6'0, 175 pounds, blood type O-, ENFP-T, right-handed, his favorite color is royal blue, and he has a gifted vocal octave range (3.8), and is very good at most forms of dance.
What scenarios have I put him in that helped him build? This was actually how I decided he was good with technology and all things coding, hacking, computers, etc. I figured out he was good at this stuff when I needed a character to hack something later on in the story and I threw him into the mix just to see what would happen and it stuck IMMEDIATELY. So, this category can also help build category 2 for sure.
Bits of me? His dedication to the arts and his desire for a large friend group hope I didn't just roast myself lol
DISCLAIMER: I want to make a note for anyone who thinks that this is overkill: yes, it probably is. But, I also want to note that I have been told time and time again that my characterization in my stories is my strongest point. So, clearly I'm doing SOMETHING right here.
I also want to note that this is NOT the "correct" way of coming up with characters. In fact, I don't think there is a "correct" way (as is with most things artistic and creative). This is just MY way of doing things. If you have a way that you come up with characters that works for you, I'd love to hear about it!
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ariathelamia · 30 days ago
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Hellhound HRT Month 8 (4 Month Wolf , 4 Month Hellhound)
Soooo… It’s me again, and there has been quite a bit that happened here so, let's get started.. (And no, I'm not gonna “write more professionally” for you!).
Okay so, I’ve been discharged from the hospital, my body has built some resistance to the high temperatures, though it’s not really able to handle the highest temperatures for too long yet. At least I don't pass out when I get too happy from eating my favorite meal anymore.
Now to something more troubling… turns out my right leg’s bone ended up growing malformed so they had to re break and fix it together again.. so i’m wearing a full on brace there, and a normal cast on the left one which luckily grew back together well… no idea what caused this kinda unequal thing but uh… not gonna complain of only having one being put back together like a jigsaw puzzle…
Coming back to the heat thing- So… i still can’t breath fire really, but i can sort of… direct the heat towards my mouth and when i bite things.. I can basically cook things in my mouth! 
The Nurses also have to be careful when trying to do blood draws… not only does my thick furr make it hard to find a vein to begin with… but… and I hate to make this sort of public in these notes… I HATE needles… And we all know what happens when I get annoyed…
So yeah I actually managed to heat up a syringe with my blood and the nurse dropped it… it broke and god… steaming blood… kinda glowy too? but the glow disappeared shortly when it cooled down. 
Now to more kinda… crazy changes… one night i just woke up… but the weird part is… even though i still had my eyes closed… I could see… and pretty well too even though the room was dark! I did open my eyes… and I could tell that I saw… more.. you know how when you close one eye, your brain kinda ignores the blacked out part and you still see just in a smaller field of view?... And when you open your eyes that field of view suddenly gets wider…imagine that feeling… just not with two eyes… but 4… that's right, you’re girl got two more eyes, slightly below my first pair… and a little closer to my ears… they are also smaller than the original pair.. like around… 3/4th of the size. It took me like.. an hour before i was able to close them… kinda weird to access muscles you never had before.
My hands are also growing slightly?... well the arms are getting slightly thicker and gaining muscles, even though all i was able to do was sit in the hospital.. I am also able to pull in my claws into my paws! No more accidental gushing wounds!
So yeah that's about all the changes I noticed!
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[The following texts have been written in a separate notebook.]
Started this little side project to keep my thoughts in order when it comes to the eldritch kinda stuff happening… I remember when I mentioned weird dreams to Mars before… she got quite mad… not at me but at my dreams?... Idk… I am going to write them down though… because I feel like doing that is important so I can make sense of what's happening to my mind.
During those two months, the dreams of the Moon continued…
The form I have in those dreams is always pretty similar, but it’s getting more.. defined? 
My body in those dreams is like… mhh..  Like a black silhouette of my body… that's shrouded in thick smoke… barely holding shape.. like one gust would spread me in all directions… I can see… but I can't talk.. I literally don’t have a mouth to do so… at the start i couldn’t hear either but that's apparently different now so i guess.. the more i transition… the more defined my shape gets?.. questions for Mars.
Speaking off, I remember Mars warning me about some tentacle lady-... I wondered if that’s the one I kept seeing in the distance.
Though after one particular night, I KNOW it’s the one…. cause she found me… 
Her name is Nyarlathotep… and she hates my guts apparently.  I’ll try to write down the conversation as best as I can remember it…
“Now look what we have here, finally I reached you before you went “poof” again. And by the look of your eyes, this time you can actually hear me. Tried calling out to you little … thing… but you never seemed to respond.”
(I tried to say something back but… no mouth… urgh. I did however move my arms, gesturing to our surroundings…)
“Oh this? Welcome in Azathoths dream, the dream of my Mother… My name is Nyarlathotep, and YOU… you are an intruder, brought in by that halfling that dares to intrude into our domain. You humans just love to play with things you don’t understand hm? You have no idea what kind of things you are inviting into your life, thanks to HIS ridiculous idea of “help���. That damn halfling is hellbend of ruining this beautiful dream… and now you are here… but worry not, I got just the thing. " 
It was then she held out her hand to me… holding a single pill in her hand that shimmered in an eerie glow. I looked at it but then back at her. She had this grin on her face that would have made my blood freeze if that had been possible at that moment… Her presence at that moment was… similar to Mars… just… different and more concentrated… Was she the same species as what Mars was going to be? 
“Just take this, and all can be normal again. After all that fall of yours surely must have shown you that your transformation is unpredictable? You are simply not cut out to become one of us… not that you ever could… Your body is going to burn itself out and you will simply become nothing but a pile of ash… but all of this can be prevented still. Just… take…this…pill…”
To say I was frightened was an understatement… And I could feel this strange pull towards that pill… my body being drawn to it… my head moving towards it as if something was trying to make me eat the pill straight out of her hand.. 
I didn’t want to- I didn’t believe what she said, I knew Mars wouldn’t have helped me just so I ended up as ashes on the floor-... she warned me from this one-... and yet I was powerless.. my face was just in front of that pill when suddenly.. a glow shined from underneath us… Something grabbed my legs and my head and yanked me away… I could hear Nyarlathotep cursing as I was dragged into the moon itself… And as the glow started to blind me… i could vaguely make out the form of some other being… i don’t know what to make of it.. but it spoke too-... though only a few words before i ended up waking up… “Just in time… wake up, you are safe."
That's when I ended up waking up in my hospital bed… Terrified for my life.. The Fire that shines through my chest illuminated the room in a blue-ish glow… guess that's what happens when I'm afraid. I could tell that the fire was a lot cooler than usual.
But god damn was I afraid to sleep the following nights. 
I didn’t see Nyarlathotep in the following dreams… not that every dream happens on the moon but the ones that do I was just panicking.  Though… one night… I could have sworn I had felt Mars’s presence… far away… I tried to get closer but I ended up waking up after some distance… 
I wanted to call her… tell her from my dreams but guess whose phone is broken thanks to the fall… and i didn’t remember her number… in hindsight could have asked to call the library… but i also didn’t want to talk about this stuff over the hospitals phone line… dunno if they keep recordings or anything… Why am I so freaking paranoid about this!? urgh..
Anyway, now I'm out of the hospital… got an appointment next week with Erian for my 9th month check up, even though I kinda missed the 6th month one but.. bureaucracy. 
But before all that… I really need to talk to Mars… cause I would at least know a little more about that stupid bitch that keeps making me sleep with one eye open… And whatever that glowing thing was.
[End of notes]
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[Meeting with Mars]
I decided to go to Mars today. Well “go” is a strong word, i wheeled there.. as in.. a wheelchair. Got me a new phone on the way. The good thing was that the card was still intact, so I was able to plan a meeting. So here I am, at the front entrance of the Thayer library, taking a few deep breaths. I wheeled myself in and approached the counter. 
To my surprise, I did not feel that scared when inside. It felt more.. home-y like. Maybe it’s just me being finally around someone that gets me on a deeper level than the hospital staff. I went up to the front desk, and reached over to ring the Bell twice, waiting for Mars to appear. Makes me wonder if she’s the only one working here? big place for one person.. hmm..
I looked around, I noticed the library had changed, ever so slightly. Arrangement of the displays, the tables shifted in different positions, and a stack of new acquisitions building up on a cart outside of the staff entrance. But one detail caught my eye, the desk that Mars normally sat at had a raised almost organic growth forming on the edges. It was a darkish purple and black structure and seemed to be enveloping her space. 
My scrutinizing of the mysterious growth was broken by the sound of a loud elevator ding. The staff door then unlocked and swung open as Mars, now much taller ducked her way into the reading room. She was nearly 13 feet and developed a boney crown around her head. Her tail was longer, and the unknown appendages on her back that twitched and articulated grew in number. Something else caught my attention, one of her eyes, specifically the top left one was yellow.. not pink. Looking closer I noticed scarring on her eye and around her neck. 
With her entry, the lights of the library dimmed but unlike last time, her presence wasn’t as heavy. The shift in temperature caused my body to steam as she turned her attention to me and looked delightfully surprised.
“Arynia! It’s good to see you again!”.
It took a second for her to process my current state as her expression turned to one of concern. 
“Oh my gosh, are you alright? What happened to your legs?”.
It took me a second to actually process the question after seeing her injuries. 
“Uh-... I had a bit of an accident while running over some rooftops and uh… fell. My new organ decided not to wait to flare up, literally, and I ended up taking a nasty fall… Just got released from the hospital the other day actually.”
I chuckled nervously, but… I could tell it didn’t help to really ease the situation. 
“ Well, long story short i… broke a couple of bones… my legs got the worst of it, probably because they were in the process of changing… and one of them grew together wrong at first- they did manage to fix it however, after getting an animal surgeon for help! Isn’t that kinda-... hilarious?... eh-... ehehe… “
Curse my ears and tail for displaying my actual emotions so well… I didn't even notice my ears were drooped down and my tail nervously clutching my midsection like some kinda belt. 
Mars couldn’t help but smile, she let out a nervous chuckle and gave a reassuring pat on the head.
“You were running over rooftops?” She giggled.
“Such an adventurous pup, but I’m glad you’re doing alright. I hope your legs heal quickly! I can promise you, it took some practice getting used to mine after I hatched”.
Mars raised her arm after giving a gentle scratch and returned to her desk. The growths responding to her presence and pulsing with a purplish light in some of the raised sections. 
“So, what can I help you with? Looking for a book?”
I shook my head and pondered on how to say what I was here for…
“Well… no, I’m actually here to uh… talk to you about some of those… Nightmares I mentioned before?... The Moon ones? Especially about that… tentacle freak you mentioned…” I shrunk together a little, the last time I mentioned that cracking moon to her… it did not go well.
“She uh… found me… or rather reached me…?”
Mars froze, her expression shifting to one of horror as she listened to me recount my dreams. She looked down at her keyboard, her eyes wide and her claws twitching. The library once more felt oppressive, the lights barely able to combat the darkness as both Mars and I were casted in shadow. Mars’s eyes emitted an intense yellow and pink glow as the growths around her began consuming more of her desk and chair. 
I nervously wheeled myself back a little. “It’s uh, good though!... I’m safe! uh… she did seem worried about me?... since she somehow knew about the accident too?... The only bad thing was that she tried to make me eat some weird blue pill right out of her hand-... b- but then some light came from the moon and I got dragged away and woke up! Nothing to worry about-.... right?”
I need to learn to shut up when nervous-
Her head shot up, glaring at me, as her expression turned to one of anger. She ran her claws into the desk, easily cutting through the plywood and leaving a massive gash. Her stare was horrifying, like she was about to lash out at me. I tried to say something but couldn’t help but stammer, desperately trying to ease the tensions of our conversation. Right as I was about to say something, she interrupted, her voice was changed, distorted. She spoke with what sounded like multiple voices at once as she asked.
“You don’t understand… do you..?”
She pushed off the desk, its construction cracking underneath her weight as she stood and glared at me. Her height and piercing glare made it hard to look her in the eyes. Despite my inability, she glared at me with no issue. I felt paralyzed, the chair creaking at the invisible force she pushed down on me with. I gritted my teeth, my chest burning like a desperate flame trying to avoid being snuffed out. It took every ounce of my strength to respond.
“Understand…. what?” I stammer. It’s odd, ever since that flame in my chest started to heat me up, I seem to have forgotten what being cold felt like… I know when I am “less warm”, but not “cold” anymore…  but right this moment I got a stark reminder of it. The tiny blue glow that was still fighting the darkness that seemed to swallow this place grew dimmer and dimmer…
“You’re in danger..”
Mars then kicked her desk, the computer tossed aside and the structure breaking and collapsing as she walked up to me. I tried breathing heavily. The closer she got the less oxygen entered my lungs. Mars’s form began to shift, her head splitting into five mandibles as her foot steps turned into floor cracking stomps. 
“You and I.. we’re different from the rest… we’re being hunted.”
Mars leans in, her back hunching as her appendages crack and raise into an agitated state. She moves in closer, the glow from her eyes becoming too intense as I try to shield them. I couldn’t breath, I tried to compose myself but I couldn’t, I struggled to stay conscious when suddenly Mars gripped my muzzle. I was forced to look at her and then… I was.. there.. the moon… I felt like I was holding my breath when I noticed Mars, standing at the edge of the moon's cracking surface. 
“I’m sorry Arynia… I.. I shouldn’t have done the ritual for you..”
I looked around, it was just us.. did i pass out? How did-... I take a deep breath in, noticing that I finally got a mouth in this darn place-, overall the “smoke” around me was taking on the shape of my real body-... or was THIS my “real” one?... 
I walk up to Mars, stopping shortly behind her. “No! You have nothing to be sorry about Mars! I came to you! This is what I wanted!! You can’t believe how much happiness I feel when I look at myself in the mirror! When I see the real me… You saved me that day… I don’t know how long I could have just… accepted what I was before… if I had never gotten this chance…” 
I stopped myself from talking more… Listening to it brought up one question in my head..
“Is… is me following this path a burden to you?... I mean… just hearing me talk about this place seems to be giving you so much stress- when all of your transformation is already putting so much on you yourself-... Is it selfish for me to go on?... should i just… stop and find another way?”
Tears were building up in all four of my eyes as my voice quivered. 
“I don’t want to be a burden for you… maybe i should have just… taken that pill?... accept what i was and find some kinda way to be happy with it?...”
”Nia.. come here..”
She ushered me forward, closer to the edge of the moon. I took a step, shocked to find no pain or tremble, but a strong leg, ready to move at my command. I took a few steps, the drop off rapidly approaching and revealing the hollow insides of the moon. I was shocked, seeing more and more chunks break away. But as I turned to look in I was horrid to see something looking back. Five pink pupils glared, energy swirling as a low growl echoed into the void.
“I can’t help you Nia.. I want to, but this.. this is my burden..”
Mars shifts her gesture to the eyes as the being shifts its focus back to Mars. I follow the creature's gaze to a sadden Mars, as she sighs and grips her arm nervously.
“I’m.. breaking.. I try so hard to keep this contained, to keep myself from fully breaking. That thing down there, it’s anger, it’s hunger, it’s pain.. is mine.”
She turns to me.
“I can’t help you.. I can barely help myself. That tentacled monster.. it’s called Nyarlathotep.. It's been haunting me for months. It nearly killed me last time we met. I can’t protect you, but there might be someone who can.”
I looked at her in shock- nearly killed her?!... Is that how Nyarlathotep does things-?... 
“I didn’t know…” I sigh deeply, looking at the broken parts falling down…
“Kinda feel like a bit of a wimp now that I know of all the things you went through… and are still going through… just piling up on that with my own bullshit.” 
I turn to face her again, wiping the tears from my face, taking a bit of a shocked look at my fur covered arm in front of me… before I let it fall again to my side. “So, that person you know, where can I find them?”
I balled my paws into fists, as best as I could at least. “I’ll get better, and then you and I are gonna work on that together!” I point towards the falling debris and the glowing eyes. 
“That bitch is gonna have to face not only you but me too now, fuck being scared, i’m not gonna sit in self pity and fear, while the person that safed my life is being tortured by some faceless bitch.”
I tried putting on my bravest face… but I was still shaking somewhat… I guess fear isn’t easily combated by a wanna-be heroic speech.
Mars smiles and gives you a pet on the head.
“You have a big heart, pup, never let anything sour it.”
Mars fully turns and kneels down to be face to face, her features relaxing and returning to its standard state. As she smiles, there’s a shift, the cracking slows, the moon grows stable. 
“You’ll hate it but, she works at Erians clinic.. but she’s helped me and I know she can help you too. Her name is Amber Shepherd.”
I tilt my head and chuckle, enjoying the headpats and giving a smile back. “Ohh! That's great actually~ Got an appointment next week with erian anyway, i’ll make sure to ask for her then!”
After Mars was done ruffling through my hair, I put my hands on my sides and sigh. “So uh- this is your place then huh? Weird how I keep coming here then in my dreams, thought it might be a bit of a gathering point for beings like you… and I assume me now.. it’s… nice, if you ignore the part of a sleeping beast right underneath our feet” I said with a chuckle.
“Though I would love to spend more time with you here… I can’t help but feel hungry so… should probably get going and eat something. Thank you for hearing me out, and reminding me of why I'm doing all this.” 
“I’m happy I could help”.
The world grew fuzzy as I felt a rush and sudden release as Mars lets go of my muzzle. The pain and numbness of my legs returning as I get reacquainted with the wheel chair. Mars shifts back to her original form, her shoulders shifting as she readjust her stance. Mars smiles and turns back to her desk, the area was coated in this spiked bone protrusion. She looked a bit embarrassed and chuckled.
“Ah… that’s right.. how about you run along and grab something to eat, I need to clean up this mess.. but it was good seeing you Nia.”
I look down at my legs and sighed, nodding as I then looked up at Mars again.
“Yeah, it sounds like a plan. Would love to help ya out with that cleaning but… not really capable of that right now. It was very nice talking and seeing you again, Mars, hopefully the next time we see each other will be under happier circumstances!”
I give the huge eldritch woman a wave, and then begin to wheel my way out of the library. 
The adrenaline that pumped through me during this entire situation has made me feel like I’m starving!
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Thank you so much @dawning-mars for coming back in this chapter <3 it was a lot of fun working with you! - Arynia
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lets-try-some-writing · 1 year ago
Text
Cybertronian Civil Warfare
One wrong move. That was all it took to make Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots, mad. Now Strongarm and Sideswipe have to deal with the unfortunate consequences of their actions by participating in Optimus's game.
(First chapter of a fic I am writing that will showcase some of the stuff being at war did to Bee and co :3)
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No one was entirely sure what thought process led to the current situation, but Strongarm could remember when it started. 
The team had gathered to celebrate what was quickly being dubbed the third liberation of Cybertron when it all began. Strongarm and her team, the Bee Team as they were called, were invited to celebrate with Team Prime in the newly constructed crystal gardens attached to the  restored Hall of Records. Optimus Prime himself had been the one to give out the invitations, and not a spark had refused. Sideswipe had of course made a fuss about having to go to what he assumed was a formal event, but Strongarm had shut him up well enough beforehand.
Meeting Team Prime in a more civil setting was exciting and she had no intention of missing it for the world. But of course, someone had to screw up. And that screw up in turn led to a series of unfortunate and poorly thought out words.
Primus, did they frag up.
“Look, all I am saying is that I don’t get why you all are so high strung all the time.” Sideswipe remarked as he sipped from his cup of high grade. His optics flared a pale blue, a sign of overcharge from too much to drink. A scowl marred his features and Strongarm suppressed the urge to march over and swat him.
“Why is that Sideswipe?” Optimus questioned patiently from where he sat at the head of the table. The others present had largely continued on with their activities, uncaring of the conversation, but Sideswipe could sense the way the others threw their fields wider, subconsciously keeping an optic on the situation.  
“It's pretty bad with Bee. He’s always whining about us using too much energon and he gets angry about us not being up all night long for our patrol despite the fact that we have cameras.” Sideswipe glared at their leader and Strongarm almost burst from the rage pooling in her spark. Did the little glitch have no respect? These were war veterans for Primus’s sake.
“Sideswipe, keep your grievances back at base. We are in a public area-” Bumblebee chimed in, chastation heavy in his tone.  The former scout’s optics cycled in on Sideswipe, a sign of agitation that Strongarm had long learned to notice serving under him. Only Windblade’s firm grasp on her arm kept her from getting up to teach the mech across from her a lesson.
“Bumblebee, let him speak. It is at times like these that such issues should be aired.” Optimus sat perfectly composed in his chair, his attention on the red speedster as Sideswipe grumbled and continued, his words somewhat slurred as he continued.
“You all constantly act like you are better than us. You treat us like newsparks. I’ve been functional for long enough! By old Cybertronian standards I am fully framed!” Sideswipe slammed his cup onto the table as if he were a sparkling and glared at the elder mecha present. Smokescreen stood up abruptly from where he was seated, anger etched onto his features. 
“You are a newspark Sideswipe. I am still considered young even though I was forged during the height of the war.” Smokescreen’s servos were planted firmly on the table, his doorwings twitching as he glared. The Wreckers at the table paused in their activities, their words quieting as they stopped to pay attention. Their stillness swiftly led to the remainder of the table falling silent to observe.
Strongarm couldn’t help the way her plating clamped down around her as the war veterans present seemed to make a shield around themselves with their fields. It was suffocating to endure. 
“That’s exactly my problem! You get treated so much better than us and you don’t act much different!” Sideswipe wasn’t making any sense. His logic wasn’t adding up, and yet his field screamed of outrage. Evidently he had a lot more going on than he could voice. But Strongarm didn’t care to hear it.
“Sideswipe! Don’t be so rude! We are among war veterans and heroes!” Strongarm stood up as well. Her field flared in anger and Smokescreen looked over at her so sharply that she almost felt the urge to sit down. Ratchet slowly began to rise, his servos up in a placating manner as he attempted to speak before being cut off.
“You all fought in a war. So what? I’ve fought Cons and they weren’t even all that bad!” Sideswipe stood proudly despite the fact that he obviously wasn’t thinking straight. Strongarm wished she could sink into the ground as the gazes of the elder mecha present all zoned in on Sideswipe as if he were fresh energon ready for the harvest. She couldn’t tell whose field was whose, but she didn’t need to. All of them were running with an undercurrent of rage, at least those amongst team Prime. Windblade, Drift and his minicons, and Grimlock quickly began to gather beside Strongarm, stepping back from the table as things became more heated.
“Sideswipe, I believe you are not thinking clearly. What you are saying is insinuating a great deal more than I think you intend to convey.” Optimus was still composed ever as the rest of Team Prime slowly began to get up and move. Sideswipe didn’t seem to notice as Bulkhead carefully, and with surprising stealth, pulled the table out of the way in time for the Prime to stand.
This felt practiced, rehearsed almost in a sick way. Strongarm wasn’t sure what to do, what to say even. But she wasn’t given the chance as Bumblebee stepped in front of her and the rest of their team, his gaze surprisingly steely as the situation continued to unfold. 
“Bee, what’s going on?” Grimlock asked hesitantly. The dinobot was not usually one to look so… concerned. It startled Strongarm in a way. He was usually always ready for a fight, even against one like Optimus. Here though? It looked like everyone, including the battle hardened Drift, wanted nothing to do with the situation. 
“Quiet. Optimus will handle this.” There was no room for disagreement in Bumblebee’s voice. He was surprisingly stern. Usually he was loose in his methods of leadership. However as Smokescreen came over and stood at attention right next to Strongarm’s leader, she felt fear begin to gather in her spark.
This was serious, and everyone seemed to know it.
“I mean it all! I don’t get why you all do all this stupid paranoid slag all the time! Always on our afts about our energon usage and lack of combat training or all that other scrap!” Sideswipe’s field was vicious and sharp, but untrained. His didn’t hurt. But those around them? By the Allspark, Strongarm could feel pinpricks running all along her plating from where Bumblebee and Smokescreen practically emanated outrage.
“Sideswipe.” The Prime’s tone had shifted. It was subtle, almost too soft for Strongarm to notice. But her training under Bumblebee had done her good. She wasn’t a spy by any means, or even a special agent. However the few weeks of interrogation training she underwent were having their influence.
Optimus wasn’t happy.
“I don’t want to hear whatever fragging excuses you have, you old bag of bolts! You wouldn’t be held in such high esteem if you just ended the war when it began!” Everyone froze, even Grimlock. Windblade seemed too shaken to speak, her wings dipping so low they almost touched the ground as she stared on in horror. Strongarm was sure she was making a similar expression as Optimus’s expression changed.
He always wore gentle expressions, or at least a soft firmness or strictness. Now though? His optics were startlingly wide, almost as though he were looking at Sideswipe as some sort of prey animal. Optimus’s posture dipped, becoming tenser and his digits twitching ever so slightly. A true predator. 
“Sideswipe, that is enough.” Arcee hissed through gritted denta. The elder femme seemed two kliks away from shredding Sideswipe and appeared to only be kept in place by Bulkhead who glanced down at her in warning. Grimlock was shaking like a leaf and Slipestream and Jetstorm weren’t much better off. They huddled around their carrier unit fearfully and Drift subtly drew his swords, the tension in the air setting him on edge.
Strongarm couldn’t blame him when she found herself palming her pistol on instinct. 
“The Cons we’ve fought have been smallfry. Sure Megaton might have been a piece of work, but you could have ended this easily! But NO, you dragged it all out! Our planet DIED because you and the rest of these plasma helmed glitches didn’t want to put aside your egos and end things!” Strongarm didn’t think things could get worse. Evidently she was wrong. Team Prime were all angry. Even Ratchet seemed to be on the cusp of letting loose what Strongarm could only imagine was a legendary string of curses.
Despite that, Sideswipe must have been absolutely sloshed since he just. Kept. going. 
“Great and mighty Optimus Prime my aft! All you did was make things worse! We wouldn’t have had to deal with all this Primus forsaken fallout if you had just done the right thing in the first place!” There it was. Strongarm could feel it. This was the pinnacle. One more word and things were going to explode.
“Sideswipe. This is the only warning I will give you. Be silent now, or I will need to take disciplinary action on account of you disturbing the peace.” It was a bit of a stretch legally. However it seemed Optimus, and the rest of team Prime for that matter, didn’t care all that much. The tension was heavy. It was too much. 
“Sir, that would be an abuse of power. Sideswipe has the right to free speech. He can technically say what he wants regardless-” Over a dozen optics fell on Strongarm like lasers. She wished she hadn’t spoken, but she couldn’t back down now. 
“What I mean to say is that, uh, Autobot law does not permit…” She trailed off, but the wrath of those present was already on her. Sideswipe didn’t even seem to be aware she was speaking on his behalf. A bitter part of her processors resented that. She was hurting her reputation with Optimus Prime and likely the rest of team Prime just to stick up for him.
“What are you insinuating Strongarm?” She didn’t need to look. Bumblebee’s optics were boring into her with such intensity that if he were to be granted the ability to kill on sight, Strongarm was sure she would be dead by now. Still, no one else spoke up. The team were silent save for their unspoken anger which hummed in the air like a dooming court sentence. 
She floundered, stress prompting her to rehearse what Sideswipe had said. He was saying things that no one was able to, words which should never be spoken aloud. However as she fidgeted with Optimus’s far too wide optics glued to her, she sputtered out a response.
“He makes valid points!” Oh if looks could kill, Strongarm was sure that she and Sideswipe would be dead a thousand times over.
“How so?” The Prime questioned, his tone too smooth and practiced. It was akin to how cashiers and those who worked in customer service would smile and wave even as they internally cursed to the stars and beyond. 
“It’s just… according to the records, the war started because you and Megatron had a disagreement and failed to work it out. Then as the war went on, neither of you were willing to compromise or kill the other…” Smokescreen stepped forward, she could feel his field pressing against her. He felt murderous, so much so she couldn’t bear to look as Optimus tilted his helm ever so slightly in what had to be faux curiosity. 
“And it is also stated that the Decepticons weren’t really all that much of a threat beyond their numbers. The Autobots had superiority throughout a good portion of the war, but it was never used. The Decepticons could have been crushed easily if you look at the tactics and the resources available at the time.” Any other words died on her glossa as Smokescreen’s servo pressed heavily on her shoulder, his face so eerily composed that she genuinely feared for her life. Optimus didn’t so much as twitch as he hummed, his optics cycling ominously.
“So that is what you believe. Is that what the history books say?” Sideswipe had evidently finally begun to sober up a bit as he stepped back. Optimus’s field, which had up until that point been held totally at ease, finally spread out.
It was just a flare, but it dropped Strongarm to a knee as she looked up in horror. Optimus was mad. Her plating rattled and her hydraulics tensed as fear threatened to overwhelm her. Windblade, Drift, his minicons, and Sideswipe didn’t appear to be fending much better when she glanced over at them. 
“You believe our sacrifices were for nothing? That the countless dead were lost in a meaningless conflict? How very amusing.” Strongarm didn’t know Optimus, she didn’t even try to claim she was acquainted with him to any serious degree. But his voice… it wasn’t him. He wasn’t talking like the Prime she knew and served alongside back on Earth. 
However, just as quickly as it came, the tension dissipated like smoke as Optimus straightened his posture, composed himself and turned to exit the garden with only one final declaration. 
“It seems you have much to learn. Return to your base of operations until you receive further orders. I do not wish to see you at this moment or for the foreseeable future.” Then, just like that, Optimus left. Strongarm promptly hunched over and purged whatever she had consumed during the gathering. Sideswipe for his part immediately found himself smacked so hard upside the helm by Bumblebee that she was sure he was seeing stars. Those of team Prime were cold as they quietly gathered their things and left, not another word uttered between them.
Ratchet lingered just long enough to throw a hangover cure at Sideswipe’s face, but beyond that, only Smokescreen stuck around until Bumblebee waved him off. They were fragged. Strongarm could sense it as she was pulled to her pedes and put in with the rest of the Bee team in silence. Bumblebee said nothing as he dragged Sideswipe behind him by his right pede, uncaring of the pained groans of the speedster. 
Windblade and Drift offered their arms to keep Strongarm steady as her tanks churned in nausea and her vision swam. She accepted it without question, not even having the energy to yell at Grimlock as the dinobot all but threw himself through the space bridge back to Earth. 
They had messed up royally. 
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It was to be expected really. All sorts of double patrols, cleaning duty, and plenty of additional training sessions made perfect sense considering how badly both she and Sideswipe had messed up. However the predicted backlash from Optimus never arrived. Strongarm spent months dreading it, even waking up in terror a few times in fear of those far too wide optics zoning in on her. 
Yet, as the months passed, nothing happened. Bumblebee was cold for the first little while, but he settled back into his usual behaviors within a month. Grimlock seemed to forget all about the incident, Drift and Windblade put it behind them, and Sideswipe spent quite a few weeks in a similar state of alertness to Strongarm before he too calmed. Everything went back to normal without any word from Optimus, not even a transmission or a single set of orders. 
Everything… was normal. And somehow that scared Strongarm more than it comforted her. She had never seen Optimus so angry, and from the looks of it, neither had Team Prime, at least not in a very long time. 
Her anxiety grew each passing month, until at last, after around a whole year on Earth, a transmission arrived from Cybertron along with its messenger.
“Hey kiddos! I’ve got a message from Prime for you all! It's addressed to Sideswipe and Strongarm specifically, but I am pretty sure it was intended for your group as a whole.” Jazz, the special operations agent who Strongarm hadn’t seen since they took down the Council, stood before them. He was as cheerful as ever as he handed over a singular holographic disc. Bumblebee took it from him before Strongarm or Sideswipe could do so.
“Did he give any instructions?” Bumblebee questioned simply, suspicion lacing his tone. Jazz shrugged and smiled, his visor glinting in the light as he put his servos on his hips casually.
“Turn it on. Whatever he has to say will probably be on there.” An obvious assumption, but one Strongarm found herself somewhat concerned with as Bumblebee nodded and plugged the disk into the terminal. There was a long harrowing silence in the space as the rest of team Bee gathered around, watching with rapt attention as the screen flickered on.
“Greetings. It has been some time since our last communication.” Optimus’s voice rang out clearly in the space as his face pixelated into being on the screen. He seemed completely at ease as he sat in a chair, a series of datapads at his side.
“In light of your previous statements, I have taken the time to prepare an activity for all of you to participate in. All save for Strongarm and Sideswipe will not be forced to participate if they choose to not engage.” She was already being singled out. Beside her, Strongarm sensed Sideswipe stiffening. This was the other pede finally dropping. Their punishment for speaking out of line.
“Before you bring forward any legal concerns, let it be said before I begin that everything I have prepared is well within my rights. The provisionary council has given me the authority to move your team as I see fit, and all supplies and resources used in the upcoming activity have been funded through my personal efforts and connections.” Optimus sat smugly, or at least that is how it looked to Strongarm as he leaned forward, a little closer to the camera. Fear rattled down her spinal struts as she came to the dark conclusion that the whole year of silence hadn’t been because Optimus forgot. No, she had not been so lucky.
He had been preparing for whatever this was.
“Your involvement is compulsory.” Again, a warning. In the video, Optimus smiled, but it was a sickening thing that left Strongarm’s tanks churning. She reached out to hold Sideswipe’s arm instinctually, seeking the comfort of another as Windblade and Drift came nearer, doing their best to offer silent comradery as the words continued to relay through the audio systems of the terminal. 
“We will be engaging in a real time strategy game made as realistic as possible through my resources. This game will take place in the uninhabited city of Helex in exactly one Earth month. You will have the entirety of that time to prepare.” A grin grew on Optimus’s face, and Primus, Strongarm felt that same churning in her tanks all over again. She wanted to be sick as the Prime tilted his helm, an unnatural ease to his movements.
“You may recruit whoever you see fit. However you may have no more than a hundred units under your control.” Every word was punctuated, almost as if Optimus had long ago rehearsed the lines.
“Any Autobot you can convince to join you is within your rights to recruit. To make things fair, I will not call upon my team or any close allies amongst the Autobots to assist me.” Every movement was far too crisp, practiced even as Optimus held up a datapad showing a map of the city of Helex. 
“Are you putting it together now?” There was a degree of amusement in the Prime’s voice, and looking around, not a spark seemed to like it. Not even Bumblebee. 
“You will have three main objectives which will be given to you a day before the start of the game. I have not selected these objectives. All objectives have been chosen by Elita-One and other neutral parties.” This was real. 
“Complete all three of these objectives, and you will have victory. However in the event that neither faction involved in this conflict completes all of them, the one with the most completed objectives will be victorious.” Strongarm’s hydraulics threatened to falter as Optimus kept talking. Bumblebee held her up by the arm and captured Sideswipe by his neck guard. Their leader was deadly serious as he listened and forced them to endure. 
“Further details will be given to you upon your arrival at the site. In the meantime, prepare for any possibility. This is war, and I have no intention of going easy on you.” Why? Why did it have to be Optimus Prime who they angered?
“Designate a leader and begin recruiting. You will have no resources from the state, so all of your preparations must come from your own sources. My advice is simple. Recruit those with influence.” Optimus smiled again as he leaned forward in his chair, his optics too wide and too threatening.
“I do this not out of malice or bitterness, but instead to make a point.” Not out of malice her aft. There was no way there was not a personal grudge involved for Optimus to put so much effort into this. 
“It is my hope that our game will give you a taste of what our war was like. May you find victory, or failing that, learn a lesson amidst this trial to come. Till all are one.” The video shut down with a dooming whirl and Strongarm struggled to not purge right then and there. What had they gotten into?
“So we are playing that game…” Bumblebee murmured, his optics distant.
“You kiddos made him really mad. Well it wasn’t just you, but you certainly played a part! This will be interesting to watch play out.” Jazz commented with far too much cheer in his tone. Was all of this just a game? Even Bumblebee didn’t seem phased. 
“He can’t seriously be expecting us to do this- this bloodsport!” Sideswipe burst out, breaking the atmosphere.
“I agree. Isn’t this going too far?” Windblade commented carefully. 
“Nope! This is a common game amongst troops, at least during the war. Rion just seems to be taking it to the next level.” Frag it all.
“Then I suppose there is nothing to be done. I shall join this game, if only to give my students additional training.” The minicons under Drift’s command look decidedly unhappy, but Strongarm could only feel a bitter sense of relief. This was really happening.
“We… better get to work.” Strongarm choked out, her vocalizer failing her as the image of Optimus’s grin burned itself into her mind.
What had she gotten herself into?
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beanghostprincess · 11 months ago
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Sanji transitions to a woman living her best life with her crew. The vinsmokes find out the typical reactions indifference (They're kind of like kaido. Yeah, they're terrible, abusive, neglectful but they're not transphobic Jud is but the siblings are not).
Her sister is upset that she never got to spend time with sanji as sister.
Ichiji doesn't like that she looks so much like their mother it makes his feel something he doesn't know what it is happiness sadness maybe both but not enough to truly care about his sister.
yonji feelings are complicated. He's really angry, really angry. Looking at her bounty just makes him scowl she looks so nice and pretty. She also looks so happy and free not worried about judgment or slander from family and peers he hates it. He hates this weird feeling and he hates sanji. She's happy and living her life with her loving and accepting crew and he's stuck at home unable to open up about anything without backlash
( the weird feeling is envy specifically gender envy. Trans girl yonji she would be the most cold hearted girl on the planet but she'd be so pretty)
Niiji stopped caring about Sanji when she left the second time. Her being a girl now doesn't change anything and besides you could see the signs from mars of course she's a girl. He used to watch her play with her sisters doll all the time before throwing them in the moat
Jud nobody cares about his opinion
Transfem Sanji my beloved yayyyyy I love these asks!!!!!!
Reiju would be extremely happy for Sanji, of course, but a bit sad she couldn't be able to help her sooner. Because maybe- And this is unfair but- If maybe Sanji had been born a girl, perhaps Judge would've let some of the stuff she did slide the way she let Reiju be a little bit more emotional. Everything would've ended up the same, yes, but Reiju can't help but wonder. And also, she's dying to see her and her crew again to finally spend time with her sister. She isn't sure if she'll ever be able to do it, but Sanji's wanted poster kind of keeps her hopes up.
Ichiji is conflicted. Because he shouldn't care about Sanji at all. He doesn't care. Is she a girl now? Good for her. Whatever. She can do whatever the fuck she wants with her life. And yet he keeps finding himself staring at her wanted poster rather often, and seeing her mom in her. And he- He didn't care about his mom either. She's dead. It doesn't matter. But there's just something about Sanji now that makes him feel... Warm and melancholic and he hates it. He tries to avoid the subject completely.
Ohmygod- I love the idea of trans girl Yonji being jealous of Sanji's life and having gender envy. That's- That's so good. She shouldn't be able to feel like this and she should not want these things like her sister but she wants to be like that. Be free like that. And that makes her so, so angry and violent and she's constantly talking shit about Sanji only to feel better but it only makes her feel worse.
Niji is... Complicated. Because he doesn't care. But I think he'd also be jealous of her. Like- Jealous of her being happy and free. But he accepts it better than Yonji because Yonji goes all sentimental and violent and visibly jealous about it while Niji tries to be more like "Huh? I don't give a fuck about her. Why should I? Why do we even keep mentioning her? And besides, you didn't know she was a girl? It was obvious from a mile away. Not that I care. Because I don't care. She rejected our pretty kind invitation to the family again because she's an ungrateful bitch, anyway" but he actually does care and it frustrates him but, anyway, it's not like she's here anymore so he doesn't think about her. I also think he'd be annoyed about her looking like their mom btw he says she doesn't deserve it since it was her fault she died (and then he realizes what he said and he shouldn't have said it because in theory, he doesn't care about their mom dying).
And you're right, nobody cares about Judge. But I think it'd be funny if he complained about Sanji and misgendered her all the time while the siblings keep getting the pronouns right and they kind of... Defend her? To some extent? They start to develop stronger feelings as time passes by and I just think it'd be great for them to finally lose it with their dad because "at least she managed to find herself, we don't even know who we're supposed to be" and it doesn't matter which one of them says it, because it affects all of them equally and they have the biggest identity crisis ever only because their sister finally is happy and they want to be like that too.
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