#we cornered him and my mom got him now they are safe in the shed for the night w their food :)

[scarlettcryptid]

i love chasing chickens

[twdsfiction]

[ Daryl dixon x girl reader] Ms rulebreaker pt 2

Tw - fluff, mentions of childhood trauma, swearing, injury.

Daryl sat me down by the stool that was in the corner of the shed, he whispered, "be quiet. it's dark outside, the horde could be near still." I rolled my eyes with a playful grin, he states, "what? Why you staring at me with that goofy smile and wide eyes?" I replied, "I never hear your voice this much usually you're ignoring me, or just genuinely quiet. It's cute. It has this whole grungy thing in it" our eyes meet a little before he asserts, "this is why we don't" and i got off the stool on one leg hopping towards him, a inch away from his face as i said, "why intimidated by me dixie?" He rolls his eyes and backs away as he replied, "nah, you don't intimidate me, no one does, plus you barely can stand." then walks off sitting on the other side of the room. I saw him scavenge through his bag a bit And throws a blanket he had in his bag at me. I caught it. And I said as I sat back on the stool. "Why did you come after me" as he laid down on the floor and stared at the roof with his bag slightly under his head as he states, "I guess cause... you're only a rulebreaker because no one was there to make the rules, you and your brother lost both parents, from the beginning of this, you're a smart person, pain made you dumb." He turns over to sleep.

I smiled to myself before standing off the stool onto the floor, and gently laying on the floor, He was turned over but I could tell he was awake. And I wanted so badly to cuddle him, I mean... he was barely far away and basically just said he cares about me. But I got cold feet and turned the other way.

The next day..

I woke to the sound of munching, so I quickly got up hopping onto my sore foot, and turned to see Daryl chewing a squirrel. I sighed in relief but confusion, as I said, "why in the hell are you chewing so loudly?" He grunts and goes back to eating, i replied, "we have to head back to Alexandria... my brother needs his rhino?" As I picked up my bags and searched through it to see no rhino, and I started to panic and look for it, and then I yelled, "Daryl! where the hell is it!" He shrugs his shoulder. As he states, "hell if I know, I was saving and carrying you? Must've got lost in the horde. Just find him another animal or sum, one of the alexandria kids can donate a toy or something." I angrily grabbed my bag and asserted, "well thank you for saving me dixie, you did your job, now I'm going back to the horde." He stands up throwing the squirrel down as he shouts, ,"like hell you are? Hey y/n!" I grabbed the door and he grabbed my arm and pulled me from the door.

I turn to him, snatching away my arm and pushing him away as I said with so much anger and sadness. "I'm going! I don't care if I did he needs it!" And Daryl shouts, "which one he needs more huh? His sister or a fucking stuffed-animal? You gonna run back to that horde be my guess. I ain't gonna stop ya" my eyes teared up as I begin to cry, I replied, "our mom gave us that rhino before she died,, And when i was little girl it made me feel safe, when the world turned to shit, shit i gave it to my brother. Her death took away my childhood, imagine what these could do to him, he's just a little boy he's doesn't deserve this, and my uncle still out there what if he comes back.?"

Daryl eyes seemed to look at me different know, like he felt a slight guilty or something, but that turned into determination as he states, "you uncle that used to live in Alexandria with you guys at first, before you broke off in that horde back with glenn?" I nodded in slight embarrassment, he asserts, "what he do you" I looked away but he added, "y/n you can tell me, my father was a son of bitch too, he'd always hit me and ny brother. One time me and my brother merle went out hunting for our next meal, while that drunk son of a bastard was sipping on bourbon. I was around 6 so I go "daddy I got dinner" The bastard started beating me to a pulp. As he stated, "you worthless piece of shit, you don't deserve fish, where's my fish huh?" And merle mocks me the whole year." I ended up with a black eye and a few more injuries.." my eyes soften at Daryl's story, he really was just a man. With many mysteries, and inever knew he went through something so rough.

He sits on the stool and he add, "I get it, you know, push away everyone do it on your own, I'm a master. And you didn't deserve the abuse" my soft eyes staring at his in empathy turns to anger as I said, "I wasn't abuse and he was lonely! Okay, he was lonely and he was the only other family my mom had, so i had to keep him entertained, I should be grateful he wanted to keep us." I started to sob. "Please don't tell Rick or Glenn, or anyone." Daryl walks back and forward for a little swaying his arms like he always does. Before breaking a bottle of the beer or brought, such causes me to jump in fright. He shouts, "no! That son of a bitch! He told ya that didn't he, that you should be grateful he wanted to keep you guys! After he did tha" I looked away and nodded and Daryl yells, "He had no Business! Touching you! I tell you when I see that prick I'm gonna kill em!"

I was too scared to talk so I stayed to myself by the stool, when Daryl sits down and he states, "that asshole... he told me and Rick you guys were his world, he sounded so convincing. All suited up and I used to be a lawyer? Was that a lie too?" I yelled, ",Daryl just stop! Okay! I don't wanna talk about it anymore, forget I said it! My uncle is a saint. Okay just stop"

I stood up and grabs her bag walking out. And shortly after he came out and said, "where you going anyway? You don't even know where Alexandria is?" I shrugged my shoulders before replying, "I can wing it, take another way." He states, "how about the correct way? With or without you I'm going back." He turns the opposite way, and as I slowly heard as his footsteps get further away, I couldn't help it. So I yelled, "aye Dixie" he grunts while looking at me from afar, when I stated, "wait up, I just realize i don't have a clue how to make a fire" he asserts, "yeah, rubbing two sticks together won't work.. tried to tell you yesterday, but ms rulebreaker have a mind of her own huh?" I smiled as I playfully shoved him a little, causing his eyes to meet mine. "I think you like that about me, Daryl dixon." He his cheeks got so red. He was embarrassed it was pretty cute in my eyes. He broke eye contact, After that we begin walking back to Alexandria.

[bonfire-at-the-crossroads]

Alrighty then….

This is one of the cornucopia of wacky-ass ads that crawl across my FB universe every day.

I am a woman from New York, I’m closer to 70 than I am to 60. I’m an artist who spent many years illustrating children’s books, and who moved into the picture frame industry in the late ‘90’s. I handled masterpieces, managed a couple of factories of marvelous craftspeople, and was the person who arrived at the clients penthouse with my tools and white gloves. Bill and Hillary Clinton were clients of mine. (Bill can tell a great story, but don’t let him back you into a corner….LONG story)

The Koch Brothers were clients.

I spent a year and a half in the Fifth Ave home of Baron and Baroness deRothschild - conserving their collection of priceless artwork.

Maryanne Trump was one of my favorite clients - a hilarious, smart, tough old gal with big hair - who can tell a dirty joke with a poke in the ribs a big laugh. (She hates her brother, and it took two years before she would admit what her last name actually is.)

My husband and I sold everything we owned and moved to northwestern ireland eight years ago.

And so - this is an advertisement which is served to me based upon all of my digital information as culled from the Zuckerberg algorithm

Anything from selling me plastic surgery in Turkey, to a shed made from an old shipping container - this is part of the Zuckerberg landscape. Computer algorithms which are targeted at unsuspecting persons who are just trying to get through their day with some shreds of their sanity intact.

I’m supposed to be beguiled into throwing down £34.97 for the chance to win a digger. I’m not sure that the algorithm fully appreciates the absurdity.

But I do.

Something the algorithm does not know - is that I have a bit of ugly history with Zuckerberg’s mom and dad. His Papa is/was a dentist in Dobbs Ferry NY, and his horror-bitch of a mom ran the front desk.

We used to have him as the family dentist - 3 little kids and myself. There was some sort of dental emergency with my son, and I got him into the chair to have it dealt with. (We always lived in the limnal space between a rock and a hard place. Illustration was in its death-throes, my job in picture framing had just gotten started - and Brian had been pushed into freelance work as an advertising copywriter. We were scrambling to cling on to the floating wreckage…)

Daddy Zuckerberg the dentist repaired the issue, my son was fixed, and he bounced back into the waiting room. The chairs were filled with patients waiting to be seen - and it’s safe to say that they were all neighbors from Dobbs Ferry.

I walked to the front desk to discuss payment with Mama Zuckerberg. “I will need to back-date this check to next Friday when I get paid. There’s not enough in the account to cover this now, but it will be fine in three days.” - I was speaking softly, in an attempt to not alert the entire room of my precarious financial condition.

She went NUTTS. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN?! NO! We don’t work this way! How can you think this would be acceptable?!” and she banged on the sign that declared “Work to be paid for at time of appointment”

Everyone in the waiting room was now riveted. I tried to claw back some of my dignity, and continued to explain my predicament. “The emergency had happened that afternoon, we have been your patients for years now, it’s only three days from now….”

“Then give me a credit card.” Says she.

“I cant. I don’t have one right now”

And she actually came out from behind the desk - hollering and waving her arms around. I was shouted at in front of my kids (my youngest started to cry) everyone in town got to see just how shabby my wallet was, and in the end - I left the check on the edge of the counter, gathered up the kids - and left.

The check cleared on payday. We never went back.

And if you wonder why Mark Zuckerberg is so damn weird? This may go some way toward explaining it.

His parents are hideous people.

And so….

I spend my remaining years being served up ridiculous advertising based upon what the weird kid from Dobbs Ferry stole from his clever college roommates.

AI is the product of a batshit kid whose parents were awful.

We’re all in trouble.

[sbidoodles]

Can you do headcanons about 18 year old fem reader taking care of her 1 year old cousin, and the crystal gems having a relationship with her? Maybe how they help with the baby?

Su headcanon:

Reader (fem [18] ) is taking care of her cousin (1 yr) , su characters are helping

Garent:

Since she took care of Steven as a kid so often and since she loved you so much, she said yes immediately when you asked and immediately dropped what she was doing for the day when you needed her.

Garnet was a huge help, she had a lot of experience from taking care of steven

but uh..since garnet was usually really chill with you she takes her glasses off from time to time around you

but lets just say the baby did not like that

the baby had a full on CRY FEST.

She tried unfusing to get the baby to stop crying which helped

For a SECOND

Then the baby got really confused and started crying again

Pearl:

pearl is uh… definitely help

she was excited when you asked her

It's been so long since she's taken care of a baby, and at times she misses when steven was this young, so OF COURSE she said yes

she loved (sorta) taking care of steven when he was a kid, so how hard could it be?

turns out it was kinda hard and she panicked a lot

the baby did get scared of pearl at first and she wanted to cry

but then the baby started to warm up to her and they got along great

then she got attached

U: “Hey pearl- can i have a turn with the baby now? You’ve been holding them for like an hour now-”

P: “No. :)” 

you have to rip that baby out of her hands when its time to go

Amethyst:

Amethyst gladly said yes once you asked

Shes actually the calmest out of the gang, and one of the least overbearing

If the baby had to go down for a nap she’d sing them a lullaby

If you got stressed with the baby shed take it out of your hands and play with them

Babysitting with Amethyst would definitely be really chill

Though..she has her moments 

U: “Hey Amethyst do you know where the babies binkie is- HOLY WHY ARE YOU TWO ON THE CEILING?!”

A: “They wanted uppises” 

Steven:

Hes not the BEST person to babysit with

When you asked he was all for it and accepted right away, but then he realized that he had NO experience what so ever with babysitting

and for you to trust him with the baby- this is a big responsibility and the fact that you asked HIM?!? He has to do this right!

So he did some research

Lets just say he is now VERY paranoid and just goes into full on mom mode

"Are you sure we should just let them sit on the couch by themself? Maybe they should be on the ground! They could fall right off, and hit their head, or- or- *proceeds to list 100 more things that could happen to the baby*"

“why are you feeding them COOKIES?? don’t you know that's too much for a baby their age?!”

“The corners on these tables are REALLY YY sharp- maybe we should make it a bit more secure-”

He just wants the baby to be safe 

Thank you for the ask! I'm sorry I answered so late, but i hope you still enjoyed! :D (pspspspsp go check my pinned pspspspsp…)

[tenshinokorin]

All right, folks, I'm going to tell you a story about why we need to teach people--especially cis males of a certain age group--to keep their goddamn mouths shut on the street when they feel they have some pearl of wisdom to drop about a stranger's appearance. This is, of course, mostly about me being fat and female-presenting, so it will bring up stuff about fatphobia, street harassment, and various other things. It's also about Stevie Nicks. Mostly, it's because this happened last month and is still bothering me, and that means I've missed my window to magically forget about it, so it has to go on file now with all the other fun street harassment encounters over the years that are likewise taking up valuable space in my brain and that come up to haunt me every time I think about going for a walk on a nice day. So maybe if I can unload this here I can go back to wearing my favorite sweatshirt in peace. 

For starters, I have a Stevie Nicks sweatshirt. I got it on clearance last year and like to joke that it is, in fact, the LEAST SteevishNickery kind of garment to have her face on it, which I think is really funny, like having a reproduction of the Sistine Chapel roof painted on the underside of your tool shed. It's also very soft and oversized and comfy, and it makes my on-the-spectrum brain feel safe and hugged without being smothered. That's a really big deal. It is in no way a flattering garment, and I do not care. I can deal with shit better if I have Stevie emblazoned on my tits, because how could you not feel better with that kind of protection? I've loved her since I was a kid, and of course loved her style as well, although as a fat girl in the 80's my options for imitating her look were limited. The sweatshirt is like a shortcut, though. I have worn this sweatshirt to the emergency room at midnight, I have worn it for days on end during depressive episodes, I have worn it to scary doctor appointments. I might not be able to face stuff myself sometimes, but hey, if Stevie's with me, I feel a little bit better. 

On the day in question I was wearing this sweatshirt because my parents were visiting. That should tell you all you need to know about my relationship with my parents. Especially since I tend to overdress on these occasions to try and preemptively fend off my mother's criticism about my appearance. This time, I said fuck it, I'm tired, I'm sick, I'm wearing Stevie. I'd been out to lunch with my wife and my folks, and since we'd parked downtown a ways from the restaurant and my mom is a little wobbly, I'd gone to go get the car and pick up everybody. 

So I'm walking up a busy downtown street to my car, my brain full of cold meds and the things that it's full of when you're managing aging parents and a relationship minefield, just trying to get the car so my wife won't be left on her own with them too long. And in the corner of my eye I see this guy. And I know. I know by the look of him that he's winding up what he thinks is a real zinger, and I also know by the look of him that he doesn't have the sense to keep his trap shut. I'm in my 40s, I've been fat my whole life, and you develop a sixth sense about these things. I know I don't have time or energy to deal with this kid, so I just keep trucking on to my car, but sure enough as I go by I hear him say: "Wow, it's like a Stevie Nicks made out of a thousand Stevie Nickses." 

I do not have time to deal with this asshole. My mom is right now standing on a street corner with my wife, probably asking her awkward questions about her mental health. I do not have time to whirl on this kid and tell him to shut his fucking face before I put it through the comic-shop window. I do not have the energy to tell him I'm old enough to be his mom and if I was I'd be ashamed to own up to it. I do not have the space to tell him--also fat, only barely groomed and dressed like a drunk toddler--he's no fucking prize himself. I just have to get to the car. 

Only now, my precious Stevie shirt is covered in his invisible shit. I try to reason out of it: maybe it's some Stevie meme I don't know, and he's doing that dumb thing where someone tries to strike up a conversation by referencing something they assume everybody knows, but even if that was the case, I know what's really going on. I had the gall to be walking down the street alone while being fat and female and unsmiling, and some manchild had to let me know what he thought about my body. 

I get in the car. I pick up my family. I go out and spend the day with them. And the whole time this event is still running on a background process in my brain, trying to extract the toxin, or at least dismiss it, so I can forget about it. There's plenty going on, so I think if I can focus on other stuff maybe the encounter will be overwritten and I won't remember it. My favorite safe shirt won't be ruined. 

It doesn't work, of course, or I wouldn't be writing this. I have no idea what we did after I picked them up, or anything in the hours between then and dinner. Memories with my family (problematic as they can be, but still very loved and not seen very often), are blotted out by this fleeting episode. And even though the sweatshirt's been washed multiple times since then and I have never seen that guy again, even though the whole thing took less than ten seconds, there it is, forever, in vivid color every time I wear or even think about my favorite shirt. And coming with it are all the other sidewalk occasions I don't want to remember either, when boys or men would scream at me about my ass from their car windows or from the safety of their groups, when for days after I would analyze everything I had been wearing, how I had been standing or walking, whether or not I was wearing too much makeup or not enough makeup, trying to figure out what I had done to deserve to be the target of ridicule. 

But I hadn't ever done anything except be fat, and nobody deserves mockery and abuse for that. Not you, not me, and not my poor Stevie sweatshirt hiding in my closet. I feel like Mabel Pines being sad about her sweater with the dog dunking a basketball because Pacifica said it was dumb. It's grade-school stuff and shouldn't even be there, either. Nobody should have to put up with this. 

Don't be that guy. Don't let your friends or your kids or anyone be that guy. You want to say something about my shirt? Say "Nice shirt" or "Stevie Nicks is a goddamn Queen." Or maybe just don't say anything at all. 

[daringyounggrayson]

misplaced guilt

(Read below or on AO3)

It’s been a while since Bruce has been to one of these galas, and for once, he is neither hosting nor making a speech. It’s a nice change, to say the least.

Dick is sitting next to him, kicking his legs under the table. Bruce would tell him to stop, but at least he’s actually using the chair as intended with both feet closer to the floor than the chair, so Bruce lets it go for the moment. If it gets too out of control, he can always reach out and stop him, but for now, he’ll let the kid release some pent-up energy.

Bruce keeps half of his attention on Dick and the other half on his conversation with Jasmine Owen, a woman who works at one of Gotham’s youth centers. Bruce knew from the second she introduced herself that she came over in hopes of getting a donation, but he doesn’t mind; that’s one of the main purposes of these things, and Bruce is happy to help however he can.

“Babs,” Dick gasps excitedly, shooting upright when he catches Barbara walk into the room, Commissioner Gordon by her side. Bruce looks over at Dick, quirking an eyebrow. Dick smiles back, asks in his I’m-in-public-so-I’m-behaving-like-an-angel voice, “May I please be excused?”

“Hnn,” Bruce says, pretending to think over his answer.

“Bruce,” Dick whines.

Bruce smiles. “Alright. But stay in the ballroom. Dinner is going to be served soon.”

“Okay, thanks!” he slides out of his chair and offers a wave. “Nice meeting you, Ms. Owen.”

“And you, Richard,” she smiles back. When he’s gone, she turns to Bruce again and says, “He’s a sweet kid.”

Bruce can’t help but think at least in public, and at least to people who aren’t me. He’s half-joking, but there’s some truth to the statement: Dick has always seemed to behave better for Alfred, and he’s nothing if not an angel around strangers, even when he’s mad at Bruce.

At home, it’s not that Dick isn’t a good kid—he is—but he’s still a kid. Dick can be sassy, and he has a taste for anything that will make Bruce’s hair turn gray (usually dangerous, usually far away from the ground). He also has no qualms about making fun of Bruce when Dick feels it’s called for. Then there are the arguments, the borderline tantrums. Both have been decreasing in frequency, and Bruce attributes most of them to processing and coming to terms with his parents’ murder, but they are—difficult, to say the least. Dick will have these rough days—sometimes rough weeks—where he’ll lash out at Bruce over the smallest things. Sometimes it seems like he yells at Bruce just to put his hurt somewhere.

Bruce tries to take all of it—from the jokes at his expense that even he has to admit are funny, to the meltdowns—as a good sign, one that says Dick feels secure and knows that Bruce will love him regardless of his behavior or attitude. But there are certainly days when Bruce thinks it would be nice if Dick would listen to him like he listens to Alfred—like when Bruce tells him to get off of the unstable shed roof, for example.  

Despite the challenges that come with raising a child, there are also so many blessings. There’s no other word to describe it. Seeing Dick learn and grow and thrive is something Bruce will never get tired of. On top of that, Dick is just this brilliant, funny, and kind child. He has the biggest heart Bruce has ever seen, and he cares so deeply and widely. Bruce doesn’t know how he got so lucky. Dick is Bruce’s light, his whole world.

Bruce pulls himself out of his head, says, “He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me.” It’s something he can say with complete honesty. “Do you have kids?”

“Oh god, no. I think I’m still a little young for that,” she laughs. Then, thinking about what she said, her face falls. “Not that you were too young, just for me, I’d rather—”

“No, no, it’s fine.” He puts his hands up and smiles. “I was really young when I took Dick in. I go to parent-teacher conferences, and most of the other parents are at least ten years older than me. But I like to think I’m doing alright, and Dick’s happy, so that’s all that matters.”

“Yes, I suppose.” She smiles, but looks down at the table.

“So, what’s it like day-to-day at the youth center?”

She looks up, coming alive again, and the conversation picks back up.

oOo

After dinner, Dick and Barbara disappear again, and Bruce is left alone to mingle. Most people come to him, but he only has to escape a few times, so it’s going about as good as these things can go.

That is until a very urgent Barbara runs into him and tugs on his arm. “Sorry everyone, but I need to borrow Brucie for a second.”

Bruce ducks down to look Barbara in the eye. “What is it?”

“Dick. Just come with me.”

He follows her without another word to the group of people he was talking to. She leads him into the hall and toward the lobby. When they turn the corner, Dick is on the ground in a lateral recumbent position. Gordon is talking to him gently, though Dick seems unresponsive.

“Dick.” Bruce lurches forward, falling to his knees and reaching out to find Dick’s pulse and check his breathing. “What happened?”

“Barbara thinks he had a seizure,” Gordon answers. “An ambulance will be here soon.”

Dick’s breath hitches and he lets out a low moan that feels like a twisting dagger in Bruce’s chest. His eyes find Bruce’s, and he unwraps one hand from his stomach to reach for Bruce’s. Bruce takes it, squeezing it gently in a reassuring manner.

“I’m right here,” Bruce promises, running a hand through Dick’s hair.

“It hurts,” Dick gasps.

“Shh, the paramedics are going to be here soon. We’ll fix it.”

Dick shakes his head and squeezes his eyes shut. “I don’t feel right.”

Bruce tightens his grip slightly, hoping to keep Dick conscious. “What’s wrong? Where does it hurt?”

“Head, stomach,” Dick mumbles. “Feel hot, an’ dizzy.”

Bruce frowns, trying to determine what could be causing Dick’s symptoms. Is this the beginning of an illness, or a seizure disorder? Has Dick been poisoned? There was a run-in with Scarecrow a few nights ago, and Dick had needed to take an untested antidote for the fear toxin. Could this be a delayed reaction to the concoction Bruce had come up with?

Dick’s grip loosens.

“Dick?” Bruce calls urgently. “Dick!”

He gets no response.

oOo

Dick is staring at a white ceiling when he realizes he’s awake. Sunlight is streaming in through a giant window on his right, and there’s a framed painting of giraffes across from him. He’s tired and confused, and his gut tells him that something is wrong, that something bad happened. His first thought is that he wants his mom.

He turns his head to the left, finding Bruce in a chair and holding his hand.

“Hi,” Dick says, slowly pushing himself into a sitting position. Bruce grunts some kind of greeting and raises Dick’s bed while Dick takes in the medical bracelets on his wrist—one ID bracelet and one that indicates that he’s a fall risk—and the IV in the back of his hand. “What happened?”

Bruce shifts in his chair, face serious. “We were at the gala. You were poisoned.”

Dick matches Bruce’s expression, trying to think. He remembers being with Babs, telling her that something was wrong. Then he’d been on the ground, and there’d been sirens.

“The man who poisoned you had planned to offer me the antidote for a price, but he didn’t realize that you would react to the poison so—so severely,” Bruce explains, rubbing his thumb over Dick’s knuckles. “He was working as one of the waiters and heard the commotion. He came forward shortly after the ambulance left and he’s currently in custody.”

Dick swallows. “Why did he . . .” Why did he poison Dick in the first place? Need money so badly? Feel that poisoning Dick was the only option? “Would it have killed me? If he didn’t give us the antidote.”

Bruce, like always, is honest with Dick. “The doctors were able to stabilize you, but they needed to neutralize the poison quickly, and the antidote did that. It’s hard to say what would have happened without it, but things were touch and go for a while.”

Dick nods, not sure what to say as he takes it in. Eventually, he asks, “How long have I been out?”

“A few days. You woke up a few times yesterday, but you were incoherent,” Bruce says.

Dick wracks his brain, trying to pull up some inaccessible memory.

“I’m sorry that this happened, Dick.”

Dick squeezes Bruce’s hand. “Not your fault.”

“Hnn.”

“What? Are you seriously guilty that you didn’t taste all of my food first or something? ‘Cause that’s nuts, B.”

Bruce says, “You are my child. I am allowed to feel guilty when I fail to protect you.”

“You didn’t fail,” Dick interjects. “I’m okay—really.”

Bruce’s face is still pinched and concerned, and he’s looking at Dick like he might fall apart. Dick leans toward him and stretches his arms out, and Bruce quickly pulls him into a tight hug.

“I’m not going anywhere, Bruce,” Dick promises. And even to himself, it doesn’t sound like a reassurance most nine-year-olds should be giving. But it fits with his new life, he supposes. “I’m okay.”

Bruce tucks Dick’s head under his chin, says, “I was . . . I’m glad that you’re alright.”

Dick nods into Bruce’s chest and lets himself be held for another moment. It’s not the hug from his mom that he woke up wanting, but it’s close. It makes him feel safe and reminds him of home, and maybe that’s all Dick needs.

[carnationcreation]

Safe haven (Will Byers x reader)

Masterlist

Prompt/summary: Reader is new in town and gets trapped in the upside down with Will

Word Count: 1,988

Warnings: Kidnapping (if you can call it that), mentions of PTSD, trauma bonding, etc.

Hawkins, Indiana was definitely a… strange town. I could never really pinpoint what made me think that but somewhere in the back of my mind that is just how I would describe it. Adjusting to a new life in a town that made me vaguely uncomfortable was not how I pictured my middle school years to finish up.

The move came as a surprise. With my dad getting a job at Hawkins lab my mom and I didn’t really have a choice but to move with him. After about a week of unpacking my mom finally got a job at the local newspaper as a secretary.

My science class was definitely interesting. Mr. Clarke was an enthusiastic teacher who really only taught to the four boys sitting up front, the rest just seemed like background characters. Everyone realized that they could get away with raising their hand only once a day and sometimes even less than that. Regardless of if the answer was correct or not Mr. Clarke would take that as participation and wouldn’t really force anyone to talk after that. Being the new kid that was amazing.

When I wasn’t at school I was either one of two places. One being at the office with my mom, or two blowing my allowance money at the arcade. Tonight was arcade night. Mom stayed late to finish up some last minute papers while I spent 2 hours playing Dig Doug and stuffing my face with chilli dogs from the concession stand. I even made the top score tonight. Before I knew it the clock finally hit 8:30 signalling closing time. I grabbed my bike off the rack and began my ride home.

The ride home was dark. My bike lamp was out so I tried to use the flashlight I kept in my bag. Riding one handed was not fun. I could feel clouds forming leaving the moisture smell in the air.

I heard something behind me and soon enough Will Byers pulled up next to me, “Hey!” he shouted, “you ride through Mirkwood?”

“What?” I shouted back.

“This road is called Mirkwood by the locals, where’s your house?”

“Just beyond the ridge, my dad works at the lab” I said, his bike lamp was now illuminating the way so I put my flashlight into my front basket.

“I didn’t even know you lived that close to me,” he smiled.

“Me neither.”

Just then Will’s lamp started flickering. We both jolted on our bikes trying to adjust to the darkness. Right as we started up the hill a tall lanky figure appeared in front of us. We both swerved to the right. We sped down a hill and into a ditch. My bike crashed into a try sending my flying onto my back. For a second I laid there trying to regain the wind that was knocked out of me.

“(Y/n)! Come on we gotta get out of here!” Will said. He pulled me to my feet and we began to run through the woods. Tripping over tree limbs and stumbling over rocks.

“My house is right over here,” he yelled.

We ran inside. Turning the lock and the deadbolt before he grabbed my hand and pulled me to the back. “Johnathan? Mom?”

His dog continued to bark. Will grabbed the phone and tried to dial 911, but a loud static sound was heard even from where I stood. I ran into the kitchen and grabbed the sharpest knife out of the block. A loud bang was heard at the front door and Will dropped the phone.

“There’s a gun out back,” Will said.

We barricaded the shed door as much as we could, Will fumbled with the rifle but soon had one in the chamber and pointing at the door. I gripped the knife so tight my knuckles went white.

A strange gurgling was heard behind us.

As we turned around, there it was.

We were gone before we could react.

________________________________________________

We woke up in the woods.

Not in the same woods we ran through, but I swear it was the same one just… dark. The same feeling I got in the back of my head walking through town. Random particles flew through the air. Spores? Dust?

Will groaned from beside me.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“I think so.”

From ahead was the same gurgling we heard last night.

“What do we do?” I asked.

“Run.”

________________________________________________

We ran.

For 2 days we ran. Breaking into gas stations and the grocery store to hide and steal food when we could. Everything tasted bland or stale. We stashed water bottles in our backpacks along with chips and granola bars. Taking turns sleeping and staying on the move.

It was terrifying.

Every single noise felt like it was my last moment alive. Every movement out of the corner of my eyes made me jump. When I could sleep it felt like I hadn’t at all. We never got a good look at that, well, thing, that took us. All we knew is that it was huge and dangerous. The tentacles tried to grab us but we dodged as much as we could.

It was so cold we would sleep in the same sleeping bag we found. Any embarrassment went out the door due to me almost getting frostbite on my toes. We took shifts sleeping when we could. I think Will let me sleep longer than our agreed time but I never said anything. It made me feel selfish.

Sometimes when we thought it was safe we would talk. Anything that came to mind we would discuss, trying to make it feel like we weren’t being hunted by a creature in a strange world we didn’t know. We talked about music, books, science, video games. Anything.

“Do you think they’re looking for us?” I asked. Will shifted so he could look down at me. My head was on his shoulder and his arm was around me. The ground was hard under us but I felt the most comfortable I could be at that moment.

“Well, I think so. My mom always tells us how she loves us more than anything, and Johnathan is the only brother I have. What about you?”

“My dad isn’t around much, my mom tries her best to make my life seem normal but it doesn’t always work out. I know she’s probably tearing up the town trying to find out where I am. Oh gosh I hope she doesn’t think I ran away.”

“Our bikes were left in the woods, I think they would’ve found them by now. How long has it been?” Will said, he stretched his right arm out to place behind his head as a pillow.

“A few days at least,” I said before I yawned loudly.

Will smiled, “Get some rest, I’ll take first watch.”

I pressed my nose towards his shoulder to hide my smile. Just as I began to drift off the words popped into my head. He’s my safe haven.

We were exhausted.

I think that was part of the creature's game. It wanted us to run and wear ourselves out so it could kill us easier. I tried to fight that theory with everything I could. I stocked energy drinks when we could find them, we made coffee one night to drink the next morning, anything we could to give us enough energy to run the next day.

But it wasn't enough.

________________________________________________

It finally got us.

All that running just made us fall into its trap.

Watching Will get picked up by the tentacles and dragged away from me played over in my mind. The last thing I remembered was the thing shoving some sort of gross tube down my throat. And now it just feels like I’m lucid dreaming. I saw my house, not the one in Hawkins but the one I lived in before we moved. My family was inside. I thought I was safe yet I still felt that feeling in the back of my brain. That’s when they attacked me.

The nightmares only got worse from there.

I felt myself slowly slipping away. Like a battery in my brain was slowly being drained. I fought to keep dreaming but I was getting flooded with the exhaustion and the want to give up.

Where was Will? I just wanted to be back in the sleeping bag with him. I wanted to feel his arms around me and his slow breathing in my ear.

I felt something being ripped out of me. My lungs felt like I was underwater. I felt someone pressing on my chest and I woke up coughing. I sputtered, gasped, and cried as I was lifted into someone's arms.

“(Y/n)? This is police chief Hopper. You’re safe now.”

He looked familiar. I racked my brain trying to think of where I saw him but I only had one thought on my mind. Hopper placed an oxygen mask over my face.

“Will?” I gasped out. My chest still hurt.

“He’s right here,” a woman said, she had him cradled in his arms.

I reached out to him. I needed to make sure he was still there. That this wasn’t a nightmare.

He grabbed on to my hand.

“Please don’t let go,” I sobbed.

“I promise,” he said.

And he didn’t.

Not when we were put into the car, not when we got to the hospital, not even when we were being treated. The adults just left us alone. We were put in two beds as close together as possible. At one point a doctor came in to take my vidals and tried to pull me away from him, I don’t know exactly why but I broke down. Another doctor came in and explained something about trauma bonding and PTSD.

My parents came to see me. Dad didn’t look too happy about me holding hands with a boy, but he still didn’t say anything. Apparently he quit his job at the lab.

Weeks passed by in an instant. The nightmares never stopped but they did get better. Will showed me castle Byers and we often went there after I asked him over the radio. His friends accepted the fact that I would hang around since I never wanted to be far from the Byers boy.

At one point Mike pulled me to the side, “Thank you for keeping him alive.”

“We kept each other alive.”

I never got to meet El. Which was a shame because I’d always wanted to meet a real life Jedi. But as time went on she became an afterthought. My mind stayed focussed on school and the next time I’d get to see Will again. I slowly managed to deal with my separation anxiety (as my therapist called it) and began doing my own thing most days, but I was still over at the Byers house as often as possible.

“Do you think they’ll stop?”

“Stop what?” I asked.

“The nightmares,” Will said, “Do you think they’ll stop?”

I sat the comic book I was reading down on my lap and sighed, “Maybe one day, for now I’m just so thankful that we’re alive they don’t bother me as much.”

“Can I say something?”

I looked in confusion, “You can tell me anything Will.”

“I think-” he coughed into his hand, “I think… I’m in love with you.”

I wasn’t surprised but was still left speechless. I scooted closer to him on the bed.

And we kissed.

After that, I knew there was gonna be no one else but him. No one else who will ever know what I went through, no one else who will know how I need to be held after I had a nightmare, no one else that can calm the racing thoughts I’ve had since November 6th, and no one else I would want to face the fear of something as new as relationships.

He was my safe haven.

[lovecanbesostrange]

Okay, for the poor people on the Ruby Lucas Harem Discord suffering because of this ask (x) on konako’s tumblr that lead to things (including this fanart x), I have this wild scene out of context.

Mary Margaret was sitting at her desk, updating her chemistry flashcards. Ruby was sitting on her bed cross-legged staring at her laptop screen, waiting for this English essay to write itself.

“Ugh,” Ruby groaned and let herself fall backwards. Out of habit she put her hands to her face, but winced when her fingers touched the band aid over her eyebrow. It’s been five days.

A knock on the door made them both turn. They usually could tell who it was by the exact sound of the knock. Like Charming had one hard knock followed by two quick ones or Mulan knocked four times in a specific rhythm. So whoever this was, was more than unexpected. Ruby drew in a sharp breath. She had heard back from the police yesterday that there would be no criminal charges, but they both knew something else would arise from this.

Mary Margaret looked at her, then turned her chair to fully face the door and Ruby got back up again. “Come in.”

“Hallo. Good, you’re here.”

“Mom!” Mary Margaret was up in a second and gave her mother a hug. “I didn’t know you’d be coming.”

Eva hugged her back, but despite the smile on her face, her voice already made them realize this was not a fun surprise visit. “I didn’t know I would be here today either.” The hug ended and she stepped into the room, her gaze landing on Ruby. “I got some news last night and suddenly I was in my car this morning.”

Mary Margaret glanced at the clock. It was a twelve hours drive with good traffic, so Eva must’ve gotten behind the wheel around 4am.

“Hi…” Ruby busied herself closing her laptop and didn’t look up.

“Honey,” Eva stroked Mary Margaret’s hair, “would you mind giving us the room? I want to talk to Ruby.”

“Sure.” Mary Margaret glanced between the two and then grabbed her things from the desk. “I’m down the hall in the common area.” When she passed Eva she whispered: “Don’t be too harsh on her, please.”

That made Eva smile. Her daughter knew exactly why she was here, but she looked out for her friend. These girls always had each other’s back and knowing they were loyal like that, dragging each other out of trouble, was certainly a good thing.

Eva took the vacant chair and rolled herself over a bit towards Ruby’s bed. “So.”

Ruby slowly looked up. Eva took in the bandaid and she could see a faint red line indicating that her lip must have been busted. Trying to hide one hand with the other was a giveaway that her knuckles were bruised as well. Eva had to breathe slowly. A part of her wanted to grab Ruby by the shoulders and shake the whole story out of her. She wanted to yell about irresponsibilties, the futility of violence and all the consequences physical assault could come with. The bigger part of her wanted to cradle her like the 9 year old she sometimes still saw, who confessed to lying about her home address, as if not having loving parents was her personal failing.

“I was at dinner with friends last night and suddenly got asked if I heard about the ruckus on campus. I was really surprised when I was shown this tiny article about a football player beating up another student. And it took me two phone calls to find out it was you.”

“I’m sorry,” Ruby murmured towards the blanket she was sitting on, playing with the seam of her sweatpants.

“For what?” Eva tried to keep her voice as neutral as possible. She had felt every emotion during the long drive and had played out many versions of this conversation. But sitting in this room she realized none of those would work.

Ruby furrowed her brows and finally looked up. “Beating up that guy, of course?” It was a bit more of a question than a statement. The question had rattled her. There was so much to be sorry for though. The beating, losing her temper at all, making Regina worry that night already, not doing so great in classes lately, clinging to Snow, making her team suffer… oh, wait. “Also for not calling… I guess…”

The board said that her mother, Anita, would be notified of this by mail. That was her home address, her contact, but maybe this was why Eva was here. The Blanchards had always cared, but now she was in college, she wasn’t a kid anymore, she had to do these things by herself. But maybe, just maybe they should have called. “I shouldn’t have put this on Snow alone… she should’ve talked to you…”

“Ruby, no.” Eva got up and sat down on the bed, gesturing Ruby to scoot over next to her. “Sure, I’m disappointed-”

The word stung and Ruby interjected immediately. “I’m sorry. I messed up, but I promise Snow wasn’t even there and I won’t-”

“Stop!” Eva took Ruby’s hands, now seeing the bruises already turning yellow, showing the passage of time already. “I am disappointed you didn’t call. And I’m glad to hear Mary wasn’t involved, but I wanted to know anyway. Because of you. I care about you. And this is serious. I know…” She paused and slowed down, knowing the next thing would hurt, but after all these years, Eva needed to say it out loud. “I know your mom doesn’t take good care of you, I know you feel like she doesn’t care at all and I honestly don’t know if she does. But I do. I am not your mother, but I care.”

The dam broke and Ruby started to cry. Eva took her into her arms and immediately Ruby clung to her. It was weird that Eva had seen the aftermath of Ruby crying quite a few times over the years, but rarely had she shed tears in front of her. Maybe Eva should have made her before, pushed her a little bit towards that to hammer it home that she cared and that she would be there for her. Just the same she had hugged Mary Margaret after break-ups, over bruised knees, bad grades, and other bad news.

“I’m sorry for everything”, Ruby got out between sobs. Her tears stained Eva’s blouse already. “I didn’t mean to… I don’t want to hurt people… I swear I want to be good.”

There was more, but it was hard to decipher it all and Eva let her cry, rubbing circles on her back. Getting the full story would take time, that was for sure. All she could do now was to reassure Ruby. “I know you’re good, you just made a mistake. People make mistakes.”

Eva looked over Ruby’s shoulder and saw her pinboard. A few pictures were on it and she immediately recognized one taken the time she and Leopold had taken the girls to Six Flags. They had ridden all the rollercoasters until they were practically green in the face. It had also been the day she had seen Ruby at her most carefree. There was one photo of Ruby with her Grandmother, a woman Eva had met only once. Anita was nowhere to be found on the wall.

A group shot looked nice. Eva recognized David from the pictures Mary Margaret had sent her, but couldn’t even guess who the others were. It was a bit sad living too far away to meet all these people, because she had made it a point to know Mary Margaret’s friends in school by face and name. Mulan, Belle, August, Robin, Jasmin, Anna, Aurora… so many names. She smiled at the picture in the corner that showed Ruby in her team uniform, helmet in hand. A candid shot, her elbow resting on the shoulder of another girl. Or maybe it was young woman now.

Eva turned a bit to catch a glimpse of Mary Margaret’s pinboard. Cluttered with far more pictures, flyers and notes. They shared a room, they had shared the most parts of their lives for the past 11 years and yet there still was such a noticeable difference.

Ruby started to calm down and when she let go, Eva leaned forward to get tissues out of her bag. “Can you tell me your version of the story now? All I know is that you were provoked and sent a boy to the hospital. The article said something about questionable self-defense.”

“There are no criminal charges,” Ruby said after blowing her nose. “He said something to my friend. Insulted her. And he wouldn’t stop, calling her… the c-word… and when he touched me, I lost it.”

“He was in the hospital,” she prompted.

“For a broken arm.” A pause. “A broken nose.” Ruby looked at Eva again. “He lost a tooth. And has some more bruises than I do. He was on the ground fast…”

Eva put a hand on Ruby’s shoulder. “I have no problem believing you would defend any of your friends like that. But you must have hit him pretty hard.” Ruby nodded, the shame was visible. “Tell me the truth. Has this happened before? Because what I can’t believe is that you would pound someone when he’s already down. Something else is going on and I want to know if that will happen again.”

Ruby pressed her palms against the mattress and slid away a bit. Eva could hear - and even see - her breathing pick up. This was almost all the confirmation she needed.

“I’m sorry.”

“Has it happened before, yes or no?”

“Yes.”

Silence fell.

Eva closed her eyes. This was the thing she had feared. Because either Ruby had lost it very big time and the paper didn’t cover the big scoop behind it. Or something had been going on and she had been blind to it. And she needed to hear this from Ruby herself either way.

“When?”

“Back in high school… it was… at junior prom…”

Eva scrambled her brain. She remembered Mary Margaret having a date and giving her one more motherly talk about safe sex that had left her daughter bright red in the face. She also remembered that date bringing her home even before curfew and that Mary Margaret had been not very talkative that night. She had sworn nothing bad had happened with him and Eva only suspected that they’d had a stupid teen argument. There was nothing too remarkable about that. Had she seen Ruby the next day? She couldn’t recall.

While she was thinking, Ruby went on hesitantly. “This boy Peter had asked me out… from the hockey team… but it… it was all a prank… some of those guys wanted to like… set me up for a joke… and... “ She quickly glanced up and right back down again. “It wasn’t as bad, he had bruises and a swollen eye. Snow was there to stop me and we all agreed to not tell anyone. I apologized to him though. And it all… it was… like now… just more… it wasn’t just Whale being a dick to my friend, it’s… everything is so much sometimes and I explode.”

This was less surprising to hear than Eva cared to admit. “Have you ever hurt somebody with intention?”

Ruby shook her head. Her voice was broken. “One time… but only one time… I shoved Snow… I swear it was only once… I yelled at her and shoved her and the second I had done that… I apologized immediately and I never ever intended to hurt anybody.” She looked at Eva again. “Least of all her. I swear.” For this she held eye contact as long as she could.

Eva reached out touching her hand that was clenched around the edge of the mattress. “Thank you for being honest.”

There were a lot of details Eva wanted to know about, but this had been hard enough on Ruby. And now they had time to figure things out. But she had revealed a bright spot. “No criminal charges, you said?”

Ruby nodded. “The police seem very uninterested. And any civil things… well, I need to worry about what the board decides. My… friend said her family will keep things on the down-low.” She squirmed a bit.

“Who is this friend?”

“Regina Mills.”

“Mills? Oh.” Of all the people to get in a fight for, this was probably the luckiest choice. Although it didn’t sit right with Eva that there might be things going to circumvent what law dictated. But she also knew that worse people got away with far worse behavior and Ruby deserved to have one strike with minimal consequences. Even if this was technically her second. “I have looked up a few therapists in town already. I nee-”

“I’m seeing the campus therapist already. But I blew off a few appointments and I get that I shouldn’t.” Eva looked over at Mary Margaret’s bed at that. “Yes, Snow made me. She went with me the first time even.”

“What else are you girls keeping from me?” That came out more judgmental than she meant to. “I know you’re growing up, but you’re still kids to me. I always thought you knew you can come to me with problems.”

“Sorry.”

Eva scooted closer again and put her arm around Ruby’s shoulder. “Enough with the apologies. I know you’re a good kid. I remember you kept Mary from starting to smoke, so that’s something.”

“You know about that?” Ruby looked at her bewildered.

“I am a mom after all and some things I do pick up. You didn’t like it, because you’re an athlete, right?”

“Yeah, it’s super shitty for your lungs and I told her it was uncool.”

Eva laughed. “Wish that would work on Leo and his cigars. But thanks for that. I know you two look out for each other. But I will have to chew out my daughter for keeping a few too many secrets.” Ruby tensed up a bit. “What? Something else I need to know?”

“No…” She dragged the syllable out, dragging her toes over the floor.

“Ruby, I just said you can tell me. That is all I want from you, the truth. And we can work anything out from there.”

“But… what if…” She crossed her arms in front of chest, bracing herself. “What if… I’m not who you think I am?”

“You’re Ruby Lucas. You’re the best friend of my daughter, almost more like a sister. You worked your butt off to get here and you work hard to be the best version of you. I know you even send some of that money home you make at the gas station. Because you care so much about people you love, like your grandmother. I know you are a good person, even though you keep way too much inside. But we can work on that now.” She gave Ruby a kiss on the head, like she would with Mary Margaret. “What could be so bad about you?”

“I’m… I think… I’m gay.” Ruby breathed out that last word and was one tense muscle in Eva’s half embrace.

Eva looked at the pinboard again. The picture with Ruby smiling while leaning on the other girl. It clicked. On top of everything else, this secret had weighed Ruby down. She sure had enough reasons to be angry at the world already. This wasn’t something Eva had prepared for, so she just brought around her other arm to pull Ruby closer. “I want you to be happy and in love.” Finally she felt Ruby breathe in again.

((I just have to stop myself here. This could go on and on and on and on otherwise. Because I already know Eva is gonna take them out to dinner, insisting on meeting David. She gets a hotel room nearby. Of course Snow offers to let her sleep in the dorm but “Honey, that’s kind, but no. So much no to sleeping in a dorm bed.” And she freshens up a bit and passes a book store, where her eye is caught by a pride display and she gets a bracelet with a tiny rainbow flag, two actually, she wears one and gives the other to Ruby, because well, she doesn’t know exactly what to say, but this will definitely not make her think less of her!! Eva is the silent MVP of the story.))

[keiyoomi]

letting go.

❅ details: m. atsumu × reader; 1,165 words; angst; warning/s: unrequited love.

❅ note: first atsumu piece! thank you (insert people from nekomata fc) for reading it before i post it here. i was really doubting this work since i can’t seem to connect with the character. (╥﹏╥) hope ya’ll like this though! lemme hear your thoughts about this.

❅ now playing: i like you so much (break up version) by ysabelle cuevas

❅ masterlist | part two

"Say, if I were to confess my feelings to you, will you accept it?"

You looked up at the midnight blue sky, the moon and the stars were covered by thick clouds. You took a deep breath, holding it for a second before closing your eyes. Regret filled your mind and heart everytime you recall the scene you've seen earlier during dinner. You wanted to be that person sitting next to Atsumu. You wanted to be that person who showers him with love and affection that he deserves. You wanted to be in her shoes, but you couldn't.

"Y/N," he called, his lips were pouting while waiting for your response. He was wearing a sunglasses after he got punched by one of the idiots who cornered you. "Fine. Don't answer that," he grumbled making you giggle. "Are you messing up with me?"

"Maybe?" you teased before running away from him. You don't stand a chance against him, but you still tried. He blocked your way, breathing heavily as you catch your breath. Then, you cupped his cheeks. His eyes grew, his face becoming pinkish every passing second that you were holding him. "'Tsumu. . ." you whispered, his lips agape as he anticipates your next move.

He gulped, staring at your plump lips. "Y-Y/N."

Then, you smiled at him. The kind of smile that would melt anyone, including Atsumu. "You're blocking the doorway," you said before tapping his cheeks. "We're going to be late!" you exclaimed, giggling as you remember his flustered face earlier.

If you were honest with your feelings, will you be able to show him how much you love him like you always do? If you were honest with you feelings, will you be able to keep up with his life and his career? Will you be able to stay by his side until the end?

"L/N-san." You immediately wiped your face with your bare hands as soon as you heard Kita's voice. "Would you mind if I sit next to you?" he asked and you nodded your head in response. You were silently hoping that he didn't noticed how your eyes nose were puffy from the tears you've shed. "Do you regret the decisions you've made in the past?" he asked, surprising you.

"How. . .?"

He smiled while looking up at the night sky, adorned with the toenail-shaped moon and tiny twinkling stars. "Suna-kun told me," he responded. "He told me about how you and Atsumu were like back in high school. He told me that. . ." He turned his head towards you. ". . .you were scared of losing what you have with Atsumu-kun," he continued.

You looked at the pond nearby, where tiny fishes swam creating tiny bubbles as they do. "I was. . ." you replied before chuckling dryly. "I was afraid of taking that risk. Scared of what would happen if he was only making fun of me when he asked that." You sobbed, teardrops staining the yukata you're wearing. "Scared of losing him completely. I'm. . ." You turn away from Kita before wiping your cheeks. "I would rather. . . b-be his bestfriend as. . . as long as I get to support him through anything."

You covered your face with your hands, crying as if you lose the most precious thing in your life. Or maybe. . . you already did.

"Pain is inevitable, but with pain a person could either grow or wither." You turned to him with teary eyes. "I'm not good with giving an advice, but I think you should do something that you wouldn't regret in the future. Something that would lift that burden and regret you were carrying for years." Then, he smiled. "Let go."

The following morning, Miya Atsumu received an envelope from his brother Osamu.

"What is this?" he asked before glancing at the room where his girlfriend was sleeping soundly. "Did you put some bills inside? How much?" he asked while opening the envelope. "Eh?"

Suna was the first to speak while looking outside the inn where they were staying. "We found that in Y/N's room earlier today. Each of us read her letters addressed to us."

He looked at Kita-san who sat on the same spot when he spoke with you. "She'll be fine and she'll return when she's ready," said before sipping the tea he made.

Atsumu immediately opens your letter in his hands.

To idiot Tsumu,

Try not to miss me too much. I may not be able to show you my support like before, but always remember that I'd still be watching your games. I won't tell you or anyone where I am going. Try guessing. Bleh! I guess, I can't keep on blabbering nonsense just to annoy the hell out of you, which may or may not result to you crumpling this paper before throwing it in the bin.

You're still reading, huh. Fuck, I guess?

Remember when we were in second year. Back when you punched those good-for-nothing idiots and got hit by one of them? You asked me a question that I can't seem to forget.

"If I were to confess my feelings to you, will you accept it?"

Yes. I will.

That's what I wanted to answer you, but I got scared. What if you were just joking? Wouldn't that ruin our friendship? More or less you would avoid me like a plague. I don't want that to happen. I don't want to lose you completely. So, I kept my mouth shut.

I kept my mouth shut even if you drive my heart insane with your words and gestures. I almost told you how much I love like you during that night.

During our graduation ball when my mom made me wear that off-shoulder dress. You were pouting throughout the event and even walked away from the venue. Only to return with your volleyball jacket. You made me wear it the entire night. Your scent even rubbed on my clothes.

That same night, I wanted to tell you how much you mean to me. How much I care for you. How I wish to stay with you through thick and thin. But before I could open my mouth, you told me that you'd like to focus on your volleyball career. That you don't have any time to spare for love.

I forced a smile and told you that I will always be there to support you.

I fulfilled that promise, right?

But I guess I was playing it safe since then.

I regret not telling you how I feel. I regret that I let my fear get the best of me. I regret that I've lost my chance to make you feel how much I love you.

By the time you're done reading this, I've probably arrived at the place where I wish to heal. Thank you, Atsumu. For being a good friend. You will always have a special place in my heart. Remember that.

L/N Y/N.

❅ taglist: @haikyuu-ink ; @kenchiko ; @agaassi ; @lovetsuki ; @sadsugarplumm ; @yams046 ; @namyari ; @thatnikkixx ; @k-eijiakaashi ; @akaashit-baeji ; @thatasiang1rl ; @starfleetakaashi ; @stcrryskies ; @kunimwuah ; tba (send an ask or dm if you’d like to be added/removed!)

[noladyme]

La Cuervo - Chapter 16

She is used to the biker-life, having grown into a woman in the familiar embrace of SAMCRO. A bad decision and a gun-shot later, she gets whisked off to Santo Padre, and put under the protection of another club. What is supposed to be a short stint in the Mayan headquarters just north of the border to Mexico, turns into something more; when la quervo begins to develop feelings for el angel - and he seems to return them in kind...

TW: violence, blood, drug use, alcohol, smut, fluff, angst

In the spirit of "The Crown Princess of Charming", this is a story about O.C. Nina and Angel Reyes. It is obviously non-canon, as characters who have passed on, on Mayans M.C., are present in it, and others have been excluded completely. Nina is written as a cis-female, but I have tried to keep her race and looks as ambigous as possible. Should you find any of this story offensive, please let me know.

16.

They rode through the night, and arrived in Santo Padre in the early morning. EZ had seemed to find it hard keeping his place in the back of the caravan; eager to get back to his brother. Nina, seated behind him, felt the same. In her backpack was the picture of her and Jax, along with the few belongings she’d already brought there and back again once. She had the journal as well; knowing that the day she was meant to part with it hadn’t come yet. The sun was just beginning to show over the top of the buildings, when the caravan split up at the city limit. Nina promised Bishop she would be at the clubhouse in the evening; and he gave EZ stern instructions to keep his eyes on her at all times. “Palo gave us until tomorrow night, to let him know what we wanna do", he said. “But I’m not taking any chances". Nina nodded, and EZ promised to keep her safe, until she was back at the scrapyard.

EZ drove them to Felipe’s house, where Angel had been holed up for the last few days; and Nina almost sprang from his bike before he came to a full halt, to run for the front door. Before she could reach for the doorknob, Felipe opened, and pulled her in for a warm embrace. “I’m so happy you’re here, mijita”, he said. EZ came up behind Nina, and Felipe released her from his arms. “He’s not here…”. Nina felt her heart drop, and EZ was already moving back towards his bike. “Did he say which tunnel…?”, he asked. “No, EZ… He went to see your mother”, Felipe said. “But…”, EZ began; probably thinking about the urn of ashes set up in the house. “The cemetery. He said he wanted to be alone… Stole the keys to my truck”, Felipe said. EZ got on his bike. “Nina!”, he called after her. “Yeah…”, she replied, and ran over to get on behind him.

The ride to the cemetery took a lot less time than it probably should have. Nina had never seen EZ drive faster; and she clambered to his waist to keep from feeling like she was about to fly off the seat. It was still too early for many visitors to the graves. EZ pulled up next to Felipe’s truck, which was the only other vehicle on the lot, and very much double parked; and then led Nina down a path flanked by gravestones and mausoleums. “It’s down here”, he muttered. Nina grabbed his wrist. “I’ll go… I should do it”, she said. EZ nodded, and pointed in the direction she needed to head down.

There was an eerie quietness to the graveyard; even more than what one would expect from a place like it. She heard the sound of some glass shattering, and jolted her head in the direction it had come from. “Oh shit… sorry, mamá”, Angel’s voice muttered. Nina quietly made her way towards where she’d heard his voice; her heart in her throat. She almost tripped over a Dos Equis beer bottle, and saw remnants of a cigarette just next to it. A little further down the path lay another bottle; and Nina was beginning to feel like she was in a bad version of Hansel and Gretel. “Fucking Nina…”, Angel said, from just around the corner of a mausoleum. “La amaba, mamá. She makes this cute face when she has her first sip of coffee in the morning. And when she’s drunk, she snores, but it sounds like bees living in her nose; it’s so funny… You would have loved her too. Even though she can’t cook… She’s smart, and funny, and so fucking beautiful; I mean her ass is just… sorry”. Finally reaching Marisol Reyes’ gravestone, Nina found Angel standing in front of it; a beer in one hand, and a cigarette in the other. “And I’m a fucking idiot, I know… I mean, how could someone like her ever… no la merezco. I’m not the kind of man to get lucky like that. EZ, maybe; he’s got that perfect thing going for him; but me… pfft…”. He took a swig of his beer.

“Angel…”, Nina said softly. Angel turned around; his eyes wide. “Nina? What are you doing here?”, he said. She took a hesitant step forward. “I came back”, she said, and shrugged slightly. “I didn’t want to leave, but I had to… I’m sorry”.

Angel took a wobbly step towards her; he was clearly well-oiled. Nina held out her hands, as if she could catch his weight if he fell. “You have to leave. Palo knows…”. “I know… But you don’t have to worry. Bishop has a plan”, Nina said. Angel laughed sarcastically. “Bishop… El jefe… He always knows what to do, don’t he…?”, he said. “Like when he made me treat you like shit in front of everyone”. His face suddenly dropped. “Is that why you left? Because I…”. “No, Angel…”, Nina said, and reached for his hand. She took the beer from it, and set it down on the ground; before putting his palm to her cheek. “That had nothing to do with you… Everything I said; it was just because I needed to push you away… and I’m so sorry”. “What happened. Why did I lose you?”, Angel rasped. His eyes were welling up, and he gently stroked her temple with his thumb. “I’ll tell you everything, I swear…”, Nina said, and braced her hands against his chest, as he stumbled forwards. “But first, you need to sober up”. “But if I do, maybe you’ll go away again. What if you’re just…”, Angel began. Nina took the cigarette he was holding, and threw it on the ground; before taking his wrists to wrap his arms around her. She cupped his face. “I’m here… and I’m not going anywhere, unless you ask me to leave”.

Angel let out a groaning sigh, and lowered his head to bury his face in the crook of her neck. “I love you… I fucking love you, ma’”, he said, and pulled his head back again. “Nina?”. “Yeah?”, she smiled. “I love you”. “I love you too, Angel”, Nina chuckled. “Come on…”. She looked towards the gravestone belonging to Marisol Reyes, and sent a warm thought to the woman who had had given birth one of the most important people in her life. It was a weird déjà vu, but this time she was more optimistic.

Pulling his arm around her shoulders, Nina led Angel back towards the parking lot. EZ met them by the truck. Angel’s face lit up. “Ezekiel! Nina is back”, he said. “I know. I brought her here”, EZ smiled. Angel’s expression fell into a frown. “That was a fucking shit idea. She’s not safe…”, he said. “I’ll be fine, papi. Let’s get you home”, Nina said. Angel chuckled. “She called me papi…”.

Nina opened the door to the truck, and made Angel get in the passenger seat. “Your mom’s grave is gonna require a little cleanup”, she muttered to EZ. “Unless she liked beer bottles as decorations”.

---

Nina drove Angel back to his house in Felipe’s truck. EZ drove in front of them, to make sure Nina was safe; and probably to keep an eye on his drunk brother. Between the two of them, Nina and EZ managed to get Angel inside the house, without making his neighbors stare too much, on their ways to work.

Once inside, Angel was about to head for the bedroom, when Nina pulled at his arm to get him to follow her towards the bathroom. “Shower”, she ordered. EZ furrowed his brows. “Nina, I love my brother, but I don’t need to see his naked ass”, he smiled. “You’re jealous of all this cake”, Angel said. Nina rolled her eyes. “More like pancake”, she said, and patted his behind; to get him through the door. “Coffee…”, she muttered to EZ, who nodded, and headed in the direction of the kitchen.

Angel stood like a lost lamb in the middle of the bathroom. “Strip”, Nina said. Angel smirked leeringly. “Take your clothes of, and get in the shower, Don Juan”, she sighed, and pushed his flannel of his shoulders. Angel managed to take off his t-shirt himself, while Nina unbuttoned his jeans, and pulled them down his long legs, along with his boxers. Face to face with his semi-hardon – something she was surprised he could even manage in his current state – for a split second she admittedly considered taking advantage of the situation. Hearing EZ scramble around in the kitchen, she cleared her throat, and got up to stand again.

Angel stepped into the shower, and turned on the water. Nina quickly shed her clothes, and went in with him. “I know I’m drunk, but are you naked in the shower with me right now?”, Angel chuckled. “Yup…”, Nina said, and squirted some shower-gel into her hand. “Why?”, he asked. “Because you smell like a brewery, and you don’t really seem to be in a state to be able to handle this getting clean-thing on your own”.

She rubbed her hands together to form lather, and began washing Angel’s chest. Angel wiggled his brows suggestively, and leaned down to try for a kiss. “No…”, Nina said, and stepped out of the shower to get his toothbrush. Putting some paste on it, she went back under the cascading water; handing the brush to Angel. “Brush… thoroughly!”, she said. Angel rolled his eyes, took the toothbrush; and while she made him turn around, he began brushing his teeth. Nina got some more shower-gel, and washed his back; moving her hands under his arms to get him clean. “Tickles…”, Angel chuckled. “Uh huh…”, Nina muttered, and washed her way down to his bottom; giving them a quick once over with the soap, and trying to avoid letting her hands wander.

Next up was shampoo. Nina took the toothbrush from Angel, and threw it in the sink; not wanting to have to get out of the shower again. Angel was a bit lopsided in his drunkenness, and she was worried he’d fall and hurt himself. She reached up to wash Angel’s heavily gelled hair – he’d probably not showered in days, and had clearly just added more gel each morning – and began running her fingers through his locks. She remembered that she hadn’t brought any clean clothes for either of them. “EZ!”, she called out. “Is there a problem?”, EZ replied from outside the door. “Yes. She’s forcibly washing me!”, Angel yelled. “Shut up”, Nina said. “Could you get some clean boxers for Angel, and my backpack by the front door?”. “You want me to go through his underwear?”, EZ groaned. “It’s either that, or watch his naked ass walk through the house”, Nina replied. “Fine…”, EZ said. She heard him move towards the bedroom.

Her arms were beginning to hurt from having to reach for Angel’s head. “Knees, please”, she said. “Knees-please…”, Angel chuckled, and got down to sit on his heels. Nina began massaging his skull again, when suddenly, Angel leaned forward, and buried his face in the apex of her thighs. “Angel, not now…”, Nina gasped. Apparently, Angel didn’t hear her over the sound of the shower – or he simply didn’t care – because his tongue somehow found it’s way to her clit, and began flicking against it. He moaned at the taste of her, and a delicious tingling sensation spread through Nina’s body. She had to brace herself against his shoulders to keep from falling. “Fuck, mami…”, Angel growled. “You like this?”. “Yes… No! You have to…”, Nina whimpered. Angel put his hands on her butt, and made a languid stroke between her lower lips; and Nina had to grind her teeth to keep from moaning loudly. “Fuck, yes…”, she breathed.

There was a knock at the door. “Nina!”, EZ called out. “No…! I mean, yes”, Nina cried out. “Give me a second…”. She tried to tear herself away from Angel’s face, but he wouldn’t let go. In the end, she smacked him over the back of the head. “Ow!”, he grunted, and leaned back with a confused look on his face. Nina frowned at him, and stepped out of the shower. She went over to the door, and cracked it open; reaching out her hand. EZ placed the strap of her backpack in her hand, and after she’d pulled it inside, she reached for Angel’s underwear. She felt EZ holding the boxers out with one finger, and nabbed them quickly, before closing the door again. When she turned around, she found Angel looking down at his now fully hard cock, with a bright grin on his face. He began stroking himself, like a teenager recently discovering the pleasures of masturbation; and Nina stepped over to pull at his arm. “No!”, she chided. “Not now. Your brother is just outside”. “But…”, Angel began. “Let go of your penis, Angel”, Nina said, and looked at him with as stern an expression as she could manage. “Don’t make me turn on the cold water…”.

Angel groaned, and carefully got to his feet; to get out of the shower. Nina turned off the water, threw a towel at him, and quickly dried herself off with another; avoiding touching her vaginal area too much, as she was still sensitive. She put on a bra and some panties, and then threw on the first top and pair of shorts she found in her bag. Angel managed to put on his boxers himself, without even getting them back to front; and Nina smiled at the endearingly disappointed expression on his face, as he looked down at the tent he was pitching on the front of them. “Later, papi”, she promised, and got on her toes, to kiss his cheek. They’d yet to share a real kiss since her return; but she wanted to save it for a time where Angel wasn’t drunk off his ass.

When she opened the door to the living room, EZ was luckily too engulfed in a baseball game on the flatscreen, to notice his brother’s erectile predicament. Nina led Angel in front of her into the bedroom, and got him to lay down on the bed. While she pulled the covers over him, EZ came up behind her with a steaming mug in his hands. “His coffee”, he said. “No, this is for me”, she said, and took the mug. “He needs to sleep”. EZ chuckled at the sight of his 6’3 brother snuggled up under the covers like a toddler. He was already dozing off. “Don’t you wanna get a couple of hours too?”, he said quietly. “We drove through the night”. Nina took a big gulp of coffee. “I’ll be fine”, she muttered. “Nina…”, EZ said, and reached for the mug in her hands. Nina looked at him with meaningful eyes. “Ezekiel, I love you; but if you take away this mug, I might break your fingers”. EZ held up his hands in defense. “Sorry… Caffeinate all you want”, he chuckled. “I’m gonna hit the couch for a while. All the doors are locked, and Angel keeps a squirt gun under the bed”. “That’ll teach Palo”, Nina grunted. “I was kidding”, EZ smiled. “You got your .38?”. Nina sprang for the bathroom, and came back with the bag in hand. She dug the gun out of the front pocket, and laid it down on the bedside table. “All set. Go sleep”, she said. Angel let out a small snore, and they both looked at him. He was out cold. “Thank you for coming back”, EZ said, and put a hand on Nina’s shoulder. “Thanks for bringing me back”, she replied.

Ezekiel went back into the living room, and Nina pulled the double doors almost closed; with just a small gap, in case she needed to call EZ for help. She sat down on the edge of the bed, and finished her coffee in silence. All that was heard was the sounds of Angel’s drunken snores – Who’s got bees living in their nose now?, she thought to herself – and some birds in the tree outside. Suddenly, Angel began moving his hand around the empty side of the bed, and his formerly calm expression turned into a frown. Nina quickly drank her last sip of coffee, and set down the mug on the bedside table next to the gun. Then she laid down on the bed, and pulled Angel’s searching hand around her waist. Angel immediately settled, and burrowed against her; his expression once again at peace.

Nina laid for a long time, just looking at the man she loved. After a while, her exhaustion won over the caffeine streaming through her system, and she fell asleep.

---

When she woke, the light had shifted in the room; letting her know that it was probably the afternoon. Nina turned her head, and found Angel looking at her intently. His arm was still locked around her waist, as if he was scared she would run away if he released her. “Hi…”, Nina whispered. Angel didn’t reply, but simply pulled her impossibly closer, and then caught her lips in a demanding kiss. It wasn’t a lustful kiss, he just seemed to crave a connection with her; and Nina let him take from her what he needed. She needed it too. Their tongues met, and the taste of Angel reignited something in her. She felt herself light up inside.

After a while, Nina felt her cheeks getting wet, and she pulled back, and realized the tears there weren’t just her own. “Are you home?”, Angel breathed. “Yeah. I’m home”, Nina smiled. “I love you… And I’m so sorry”. Angel shook his head fervently. “No, querida…”, he said, and pulled her in for another short kiss. “Te amo, ok? No apologies”. His eyes were full of love, and yet dull; as if some part of him had died. Nina suspected she knew what that part was, and it was something she couldn’t give him back. Only the MC could.

She was about to speak, when she heard scrambling from the living room. Angel frowned. “EZ”, Nina muttered. A smile ghosted Angel’s face. “Of course it is…”, he said. Nina pulled herself from his embrace, and got out of the bed. She went into the living room, where EZ was cleaning up. It wasn’t until then, that she noticed the house was more cluttered than usual. There were several filled ashtrays, and empty bottles and dirty glasses littered both the coffee table and the work bench – even the floor had beer cans strewn about, next to empty packets of cigarettes. She felt as if she’d been punched in the chest, and her heart skipped several beats at the state of the place. “I did this…”, she croaked. “How could I let him think…”. Tears began streaming down her cheeks again. EZ put down the trash-bag he was in the process of filling; and stepped over to pull her in for a hug. “No… no, you didn’t”, he said, and rubbed her back soothingly.

“Hands of my woman, hermano”, Angel said from the doorway; dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. There was a mischievous twang to his voice, and a slight smirk on his face. EZ smiled, and kissed the top of Nina’s head, before letting her go, and picking the trash-bag up again. “Just cleaning up your mess, big brother”, he jeered. “Ouch…”, Angel said. He walked over to EZ, and took the bag from him. “I got it from here… Thanks”. That thanks was deeper than just gratefulness for picking up his trash. “You’re welcome”, EZ said. “You don’t have to stay. I’m good”, Angel said. EZ frowned slightly. “Bishop told me to…”, he began. Angel scoffed, and began picking up bottles from the work bench. “Look, I need to keep an eye on Nina, until she goes back to the yard tonight”. “She’s not going back there”, Angel said. EZ and Nina looked at each other. “Yeah, I am…”, Nina said. “Angel, I have to”. Angel shook his head. “Whatever. We’ll talk about this later”, he said. “You can go, EZ. I got this”. “The Vatos are…”, EZ began. Angel walked over to the couch, and pulled out what Nina recognized as an AK47 from under it. “I turned in my patch, not my guns. I can take care of my girl”, he declared. “Angel!”, Nina exclaimed. Angel’s expression softened. “Look… We’ll be fine. I’ll call you, yeah? Go… pick flowers with your girlfriend”, he sighed. Nothing else needed to be said, and Nina gave EZ a short nod to let him know shewould call him, even if Angel didn’t. EZ gave them both a half smile, and quietly left the house.

They cleaned up in silence for a while. Suddenly it was awkward to lock eyes, as if neither of them knew what to say. “You don’t gotta do this, ma’”, Angel finally said. “This is my mess”. “It’s mine too”, Nina replied. “And it’s our home…”. She instantly felt her cheeks burn at her own words, and was terrified at meeting Angel’s eyes. She swallowed thickly, and quickly headed towards the kitchen, for no particular reason other than wanting to get away from his gaze. She heard him come up behind her, and she turned her attention to filling the dishwasher with dirty glasses. “Mami… Nina”, he said, and grabbed her by the waist; making her turn around. He cupped her face. “This is our home. Mine and yours… But you gotta tell me why you left”. She met his eyes, and saw that he meant every word he was saying. She was homehere, and Angel deserved to know why she’d left that home with nothing but a bogus excuse. “Can we go sit down?”, she croaked. “It’s kind of a long story”.

Angel kissed her forehead, and took her hand, leading her back into the living room, to sit on the couch. Nina took a deep breath. “The day I left, Daniella came to the yard to talk to me. She found my brother’s journal…”. The memory of what Daniella had threatened to do. “She said she’d tell Vatos Malditos about my nephews, if I didn’t break it off with you… Palo would have killed them, as revenge for his cousin. I couldn’t let him do that”. Angel’s eyes widened in rage. “She fucking what?”, he growled. “Are those kids ok?”. “They’re fine”, Nina said. “She didn’t sell them out, because I did what she told me to… Or maybe she just didn’t have a chance, before…”. Angel nodded; but his expression didn’t soften. “I can’t believe I felt fucking guilty for letting her get killed like that. That bitch deserved it!”, he said. Nina squeezed his hand. “It shouldn’t have happened like that; and I’m sorry you had to be there for it. She paid for my mistake; what I did to Gael”. She sighed, and swallowed thickly. “And so will the club, if I don’t help them go through with Bishop’s plan”.

Angel got out a cigarette and lit it; taking a deep draw, before handing it to Nina. She took a huff herself, and handed it back. “So what’s Bish’s great plan?”, Angel grunted. “They know the snitch is a woman”, Nina said. Angel nodded; EZ had probably told him. “And he wants to hand the snitch over, pretending she’s me… They’ll bring me to Palo, and then switch her for me last minute”. “That’s a shit plan”, Angel said. “It’s too dangerous”. “Yeah… I agree”, Nina said. “But until someone figures out something else… I mean, I don’t want another woman dying for me. Even if she is a rat”. “So we leave…”, Angel said. “Get the fuck out of here; go north. Further than Charming… Just drive”. “No, Angel. I have to finish this, one way or another”, Nina said.

They sat in silence for a long moment. “I need to go to the clubhouse tonight”, Nina said. “I get it if you can’t…”. She couldn’t finish the sentence. Her heart broke at Angel’s leaving the Mayans. The club was such a big part of who he was. “Nah, it’s fine. I was gonna go have Hank black out my ink, anyway”, Angel muttered, and ran his fingers over the MAYANS tattoo on his lower arm. He seemed lost in thought for a few seconds, before clenching his fist. “Are you sure you want to do that?”, Nina said quietly. “You love the MC; those guys are your brothers…”. “I was one shot of tequila away from whipping out my dick, and pissing all over the patch; in front of everyone”, Angel said. “I’m done. They don’t want me there”.

He seemed strangely grey; as if all color had left his being. Nina took his hand, and kissed his knuckles. “I’m sorry”, she whispered. “I made you do that. You wouldn’t have left, if I didn’t…”. “Please stop apologizing. I don’t blame you, cuervo… I blame Daniella. I fucking hate that bitch… She took you away from me; and now I can’t even punish her for it anymore”, Angel said, taking an angry huff of his cigarette. “And Palo… he killed her, thinking she was you. He was going to take you away as well. If I ever get the chance, I’m gonna end him”.

Hate was flowing through Angel’s entire being. He radiated rage and lust for revenge; and Nina almost didn’t recognize him. She chewed her lips, and made a decision. “I want you to meet my brother”, she said. “What are you talking about?”, Angel grunted. Nina got up, went into the bedroom, and dug out Jackson’s journal from her bag. She flicked through the pages to find the passage she wanted to show Angel, before going back to sit down next to him on the couch. “Please read this”, she said, and pressed the journal into his hand. He frowned at her; but she put her hand on his cheek, and looked meaningfully at him. “Please… For me”. Angel sighed, and looked down at the page. Nina looked at his face, as his eyes scanned the words. “It's hard not to hate. People, things, institutions; when they break your spirit and take pleasure in watching you bleed, hate is the only feeling that makes sense. But I know what hate does to a man, tears him apart, turn him into something he's not, something he promised himself that he'd never become. He loses himself, and along with that; he loses his ability to treasure the things in life that brings him joy…”.

It looked like Angel read the passage several times, trying to make sense of what Nina was trying to tell him, before he leaned back in his seat; the journal still in his hands. Nina took the cigarette from him, and took a huff, before stubbing it out in an ashtray. “I guess smart runs in your family”, Angel muttered, and smiled slightly at her. “This shit tore me apart, Nina. And I get what your brother was trying to say, but I can’t stop hating Daniella for what she did to us… And hating Palo; ma’, that’s just in my bones. He wants you dead; so, he’s gotta go”. Nina shrugged defeatedly. “I can’t make you stop hating… I just think that maybe letting some love back inside you will dull it out”, she said. “Make you whole again”. “I love you”, Angel said, and reached over to stroke her cheek. Nina smiled. “I know… But the love you guys share in the club… You need that too”.

Angel sighed heavily. “I don’t know… I didn’t leave it on very good terms with them”. Nina put her legs over his thigs, and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Just come with me tonight. Whatever happens, happens… But you and me, that’s concrete”. Angel put his arms around her waist, and pulled her up to sit on his lap properly. He kissed her neck. “Fucking endgame, mami”, he smiled; before something a bit more sinister lit up his eyes. “What?”, Nina said; knowing exactly what. “You didn’t let me finish what I started in the shower this morning”, he said. “And you’re not going to yet”, Nina declared. “There’s no way I’m having sex in this nasty ass house, before it’s clean!”. Angel almost threw her back on the couch, and got to his feet. “Let’s fucking clean!”.

---

tags: @cole-winchester @doloreschanal

[shortpplfedup]

Rounding out the ITSAY rewatch with my thoughts on episode 5. I find episode 5 to be the most resistant to textual analysis, and the more I think about that the more it makes sense. It's a break in the story, not an ending, and that's exactly how it feels.

Episode 5, on the impossible task of rebuilding fallen walls

Big thing:

What happens when a boy who knows himself all too well and a boy who doesn't know himself at all fall in love? ‘Shang xin’: two people using force against each other’s hearts. Both boys let their walls down for each other and got their hearts broken in return. Teh and Oh Aew are wrung out and exhausted, and retreat to their corners. After all that, what is left to say? Only the lie ‘I don’t need you’. The last day of the Chinese class, the whole blessing scene is shang xin in action. Two boys who are most assuredly not fine, lashing out at each other, and simultaneously trying to convince each other and everybody else that they are just fine. But the walls around their hearts have already fallen, and they can’t put them back up, no matter how they try. Oh Aew goes to his safe space: Bas, but it doesn’t work. Teh deletes their chat history, he tries to pretend none of it ever happened, but he can’t. They’re not talking to each other, but they can’t stop thinking about each other.

In the end, the two can only come back together by finally letting go of the dynamic of hurt and guilt and just letting themselves BE. As they quite literally run through their story (the streets of the Old Town, the temple, the Chinese class, the beach, Promthep Cape), you see them shedding layers and letting go. When they see the sunset, their tears are of relief. They are together, and that’s what matters. Oh Aew makes it clear. I don’t care what we are to each other anymore, just don’t leave me again. And for the first time in the story, Teh takes the lead in the relationship. Then can I be your boyfriend? I won’t leave you ever again.

Oh god, IPYTM is going to break my heart isn't it...

Little things:

The scene at the exam centre is a blurry facsimile of the scene at the beach, back in episode 1. Oh Aew is hurt and Teh is guilty, and neither of them trusts the other. Just like in that scene, Teh’s face cracks; he wants to be close, but all he feels he can be is civil. But this time, Oh Aew’s face also cracks looking at Teh. The walls are down and he can't quite bring them back up.

Teh trying to apologise to Tarn is interesting. He knows he has treated her badly and owes her an apology, but he still can’t see, or maybe can’t admit that he did use her. Because his original feelings for her were genuine, he feels absolved in a way. I’m not sure I can agree, but I don’t mind this being messy. These things aren’t ever cut and dried.

I think Hoon’s response to Teh coming out was so honest and refreshing. This isn’t sunshine and roses. Their mom probably WON’T understand. But Hoon understands, and that can be enough for now.

Teh blowing on Oh at the temple and then giving him that cheeky eyebrow raise was the absolute cutest thing.

PP's showier acting doesn't always capture me (the breakup scene excepted), but when he gets to do the subtle stuff that he does so well, his microexpressions and how he uses his eyes, I'm completely drawn in.

[blooddrop-palace]

DMC-OC-Week Day 2

(I’ve decided to share more Picrew for the ones I have Picrew images for. Welcome to day 2!)

Day 2 - Connections to the Cast

Seraphina Valkyrie - 

My version of “the lady in red.” Nero’s mother, Vergil’s brief moment of human connection. A Holy Knight, though she was regarded more as a rogue knight… not so different from how Nero was treated. She took a risk to banish demons who were after her and her just-born son, and the risk took her to hell, leaving Nero behind. 

“Am I crazy? I suppose you can call me that. I have enough sense to know that other people will find it not normal that my reaction upon finding a stranger in an alley that could cut down demons with superhuman ability… was to invite him to my apartment, give him a place to stay for a month, try to challenge him to a duel, and then invite him to my bed. But what can I say? Many Fortunans feared me because I tamed a devil arm. Most men I knew were cowards who feared a woman with claws. How could I not become infatuated with a man who did not fear me?”

Kassandra King - 

A girl with some demonic ties who visited Redgrave to check out what was up with the tower that appeared “a while back.” Had a fling with Dante… and the results lead to other things. 

“I’ve always dreamt of having a knight in shining armor. It’s not that my brothers aren’t nice, but they are my brothers. To find someone from outside of the family who would be willing to learn about you, and let you learn about them, and for them to want to stay with you and raise a family with… it’s a fairytale. And I want that fairytale…”

Arabella -

In an AU where Nero is ¼ human and ¾ devil, Arabella is a “Great Winged Serpent” devil whom Vergil met in Fortuna. She allowed him to take her on a journey as a devil arm, and after the Temem-ni-Gru, she talked him out of immediately seeking out Mundus, and offered to teach him how to properly survive in Hell, first. This agreement got a little… tangled up in other things… and the next thing Vergil knew, he woke up one day and Bella was coiled around him and an egg.

“Humans call love to be the most powerful emotion. I would have to agree with them. The idea that I would ever want to leave my secluded life guarding my territory and stop chasing out every trespasser was unthinkable. I liked my loneliness… until Sparda taught me how to be better. But it wasn’t just Sparda. I had a lot more to learn, still. And so did Vergil. We make a good match, don’t we? And Nero would grow up learning of the power of love, too.”

Snow King - 

The “results” of Kassandra’s fling with Dante. Following near-canon, she never got to meet Dante until post DMC5. She will come to meet Nero and Nico first, and perhaps that’s for the best. 

“Mad? At Dante? It’s my mother’s own stubborn fault that she wouldn’t tell him! But that’s an old song and dance already. If anything, I feel kind of bad for Dante. I really want to have a connection with him, but it’s probably a lot for him to take in now that I’m grown. The first thing I want to talk to him about is how he’d like to handle my mother, not me. If they can put a case closed on that, then maybe mom can just… stop feeling guilty and let go. After that? I guess if he lets me call him “dad”, I’ll be content enough.”

Noel - 

What if Vergil and Dante’s positions had been switched? Dante ran out to the park and nearly died, believing that no one will ever help him, he will never believe in or rely on anyone else again, and set out to “become a devil if he had to so that he will never rely on anyone else again.” Vergil, saved but an amnesiac for his younger years, regrets everything about pushing his brother away when he recalls his past, and after losing more people who showed him kindness, decides he must do what he can to protect what little he has left. So, who is Noel, then? Well, she has a devil bringer of copper-red tones that glows honey gold, and grew up in Fortuna. Does that shed some light? (She also eventually fesses up to a relationship with Credo. Well, more like Credo finally asks her if she’ll allow courtship.)

“I can’t BELIEVE my dad! When Uncle V drags him back, I’m going to give him a piece of my mind! No, I don’t want to hear it, Nico. I’m mad right now, can’t you tell? No, I’m not crying. Shut it will you-- Devil May Cry-- Fuck. Oh, hey there Credo. Lady and Trish safely back at the shop? It’s still standing? Cool. Hey uh… NICO! Saviour, are you trying to kill us? Oh, fine. Hey, we’ll pick you up with a delay, okay? No, don’t trigger just to get to us. It’s just small fry. Yeah, see you soon. I got work to do.”

Anthony and Caesar - 

(Nope, still don’t have images for them. Picrew isn’t working today.)

What if Kassandra got in contact with Dante after she found out she was pregnant? And came to live at DMC? Well, everyone around Dante would be in for a surprise when he starts to work his ass off to make a comfortable home for the new little princess in his life, but the bigger surprise is that he doesn’t stop there with Kassy, and they become a family of five. Tony and Caesar would be rambunctious twins, of course, but Dante would make sure to do right by these twins. Being a family of part-devils, of course, he will not avoid teaching them how to fight. Tony will find himself equipped with an axe and a pair of gauntlets when he becomes old enough, and Caesar was gifted with lighter weapons of a scythe and a pair of deadly shuriken. This might sound familiar to some people~

“Our family? Yeah sure, Caesar and I have lots of family! Just from mom’s side alone we have 7 cousins!”

“Within our own family, we have our older sister, Snow. And when we were about… 14 or something, dad found our cousin, Nero.”

“...Dad never said anything ‘bout having a twin brother before. It was kind of a shock.”

“I think meeting Uncle Vergil was probably the more shocking thing. He’s, uh…”

“Abrasive?”

“I was going to say broken but yes, he’s a bit abrasive, too.”

“Well I guess that explains Nero’s reign on his attitude.”

“Does it really? Sometimes I think you’re kind of like Nero, too.”

“Eh. I mean, in the end we’re all family. Dad’s happier to have his brother back. I get it. Mom thinks Uncle Vergil will figure out how to deal with the human world over time. And if mom thinks so then yeah! Sure!”

“I would rather believe that it will be for the best, yes. After all, if you got yourself into trouble due to your own stupidity, I would still want to help you.”

“...I still can’t believe you voluntarily allowed yourself to get locked up with me for a night when I stole a motorcycle because I got cornered by a demon and had to get away. I get it, bro, we got each other’s backs, but jail isn’t fun.”

“You get into too much trouble. Someone has to keep an eye on you. Dad can only do so much to get you out of trouble.”

Tony groans. 

[cygnetofthesea]

Part 2 of Welcome Home.

He’s staring at her with a goofy smile on. He can’t help himself as his eyes rove over her and he knows she’s aware of his eyes, the corners of her lips curled in amusement. She’s all too used to his burning gaze on her but it never ceases to have an affect on her whether it’s turning her into mush or filling her will suppressed mirth. 

In this particular case, it seemed to be a combination of both even as she tries to ask him about everyone back home. 

“How’s Samuel doing? I spoke with him over the weekend and he seems good but I feel like he tries to spare me from the heavy stuff.”

He smiles softly at her. He knew exactly what she was talking about and it was true he had refrained from telling Nadia about some of his troubles lest he worry her but this time he was pleased he could honestly reassure her.

“He’s really fine actually. That trip we took to parliament was really good for him, I think. It was the first time he made moves toward his future instead of worrying so much about his family. It was nice to see actually.”

Nadia looks content with that response. “That’s good.  I understand familial obligations and it's why I never said anything, but I think they were too much of a distraction for him. He was the kid and the youngest one too, yet somehow with the most responsibilities.”

Guzman is intrigued by that and tilts his head to the side. “And it’s unfair, isn’t it? That burden shouldn’t fall on the child, should it?”

“No, not like that.”

He narrows his eyes at her, waiting for her to make the connection. “Sounds a bit familiar, doesn’t it?”

She looks at him confused for a moment before realization settles in. “What? No, it’s not the same.”

“Oh, it’s not?” Guzman smirks.

“No, because Samuel’s mom didn’t care that he was working more than he was studying…”

Guzman lifts a brow. He was sure Nadia’s mother wasn’t apathetic about how much Nadia spent at the shop per se, but she at least didn’t do much about it either. 

Nadia continues on anyway, pivoting. “Ok well, Samuel has an older brother that could help.”

Guzman remains silent.

“At least my brother didn’t deal drugs…” She trails off as the realization finally settles in. She and Samuel dealt with a lot of the same issues. “Huh, wow...I guess it makes sense how we ended up friends.”

“Mm-hmm,” Guzman nods. “It’s easy for you to see Samuel’s hardship and judge his family for it, but you don’t realize that your own family has done the same to you. And that’s not fair either.”

Nadia looks stunned for a moment and he can see her tell-tale pondering face as she considers his words. 

“I...But-I…” Nadia stammers looking genuinely befuddled and it endears Guzman. He knew her relationship with her parents had gotten better but he couldn't help feeling protective over her and ensuring that she was always treated with the respect she deserved. It was only an afterthought that she and Samuel shared similar experiences and perhaps that was how he came to be friends with Samuel after getting over his biases.

But Guzman wasn’t particularly interested in a teachable moment just then. He missed Nadia too much to spend the first few hours talking about Samuel. No offense to his best friend.

“You know, I actually don’t really want to talk about Samuel right now.”

Her eyes are full of mirth as her body shakes with quiet laughter. She was so happy and it thrilled him that it was largely because of him.

“No?” she asks.

“No.”

And before she can get another word in, he’s pushing her against the wall, his lips gentle but urgent against hers. It starts off slow as they savor the moment, reveling in each other’s touch. The familiar warmth, her soft lip soothing against his own slightly chapped ones. Somehow he’s already breathless, the sheer nearness to her knocking the breath out of him, but he can’t stop tasting her. His hands slide firmly from her hips up to her ribs and lifts her up against the wall so her feet are barely touching the ground but her mouth is more aligned with his. Nadia wraps her arms around his shoulders tighter and lets out a muffled sigh.

Just like that, the languid pace of their kiss turns into desperate gasps, wet lips pressing and sliding against each other firmly. Guzman forgets himself for a moment and hikes one of her legs around his hip, pressing their pelvises closer—but still not close enough for his liking—while his other hand untucks her blouse from her pants. His fingers immediately seek out her smooth, warm skin and he feels so deprived from the glorious sensation that he can’t help the groan that escapes him.

God, how he had missed her.

His hot hand against her heated skin set him ablaze and he needed more, needed to feel her skin, taste more of her flavor, smell more of her essence...he just needed more. He keeps their body melded together as he drags his lips across her neck and sucks the skin at the base of her throat. 

She lets out a breathless whimper, arching her neck against the pressure of his mouth and tongue. “Guzman…”

He’d have to be wrenched away from her at this point, her heavy breaths, her familiar sounds when he would touch her, spurred him on. His fingers made quick work on the buttons of her blouse, his mouth following behind with every new patch of skin that was revealed. He traces the edges of her bra with his tongue before she yanks his head back up to hers, pulling him into a desperate kiss. Her hands drag through his hair, pulling slightly, not enough to draw pain but enough to make him thrust his hips instinctively against hers.

“Nadia, Nadia, Nadia…” he chants in between kisses. “I need you.”

The elevator comes to an abrupt stop, jostling them enough to break apart with a wet smack. Guzman keeps his grip firmly on Nadia as he looks toward the door, his chest heaving. He has to blink several times to ease back to reality and realize they had apparently stopped on their floor. 

Nadia comes back to reality sooner, scrambling to button her shirt again while keeping the door open. 

“Oh my god, I can’t believe we just did that. What if someone caught us, or worse, my super? So stupid of us.” 

Nadia presses a hand to her flushed cheek while the other reaches for his suitcase. That gets him moving and he steps away from her, taking the handle from her. 

“It’s ok, we weren’t doing anything bad.” 

Guzman wasn’t bothered by the circumstances but he knows public displays of amorous affections were a sore spot for Nadia because of the locker room incident. A part of him will always feel resentful toward Valerio and Lu for their part but he knows that Nadia frets about it enough for the both of them so he tries to ease her worries. 

“I’m sorry,” he says, following behind her at a respectable distance so that if anyone were to glance over, they’d be none the wiser of their elevator activities. “I didn’t mean to get carried away—”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Nadia says with a slight smile. She seems a lot more composed. She takes his hand and he feels relieved. “I got carried away too. Can’t blame either of us for doing so, but let’s stick to the safety of our home next time.”

Home. Once again, the word causes a flutter in his chest and elation to fill his body. It was enough to cool down his heated and excited body momentarily. 

He beams at her. “Home sounds perfect. In more ways than one.”

They stop in front of an apartment door with the number 207 on it and Nadia begins to fuss with her clothes once more. 

“I don’t look like a mess, do I? It’s not obvious what we were up to?”

Before he can get a word in, Nadia reaches over and fixes the collar of his shirt and straightens his hair a little.

Guzman shakes his head. “You look great. Besides, we’re heading inside anyway.”

Nadia nods, unlocking the door and swinging it open. “Here we are.”

Before Guzman can process the sight before him, he blinks against the flash of Nadia’s polaroid camera. She pulled it from her eyes with a shy smile. “I wanted to get a picture of your reaction. I knew it would be too good to pass up.”

He looks at her in awe, stepping further into the apartment with his suitcase. He vaguely registers the door slamming shut behind his but he’s too transfixed and filled with emotions bubbling inside him. 

Hung up across the living room was a huge banner that said “Welcome Home” and underneath it, in glittering capital letters, his name was spelled out. On either side of the banner were streamers and balloons and sitting on the dining table to his right sat a huge chocolate cake, his favorite. He continues to take in the apartment, his new home, and sees there are fairy lights lining the top edges of the wall, more streamers and balloons in the kitchen and off to the side, making the place look festive and cozy. 

“I know it’s probably overboard but we were just too excited and couldn’t help ourselves,” Nadia says. 

He looks at her and her face softens. It’s only then he realizes his eyes have started watering again. She rushes to him and pulls him into a tight hug, pulling back just enough to look at his face. 

“We wanted you to feel at home here. It’s going to be an adjustment but we stocked up the place with all your favorite things from back home.”

He pulls her into a soft kiss, holding her in place just to savor her taste. There’s a lump in his throat and he feels so overwhelmed but he holds onto Nadia to tether him, holding onto her as his safe haven. 

“Thank you,” he says hoarsely when he pulls away and presses his forehead to hers. 

“Of course. Plus, it was a group effort.”

Guzman looks over at the cake before turning back to Nadia with a quirked brow. 

“Ok, well that was me,” Nadia amends. “You know Lu wouldn’t ever be caught dead with a whisk.”

He lets out a burst of laughter and Nadia strokes the corner of his eyes where he’s sure they are red-rimmed with unshed tears. 

“Well, since that’s the case, what do you say we dive in?”

Nadia helps him shed his and places it next to hers on the coat rack by the door. She leads him over to the table in front of the cake where it too says “Welcome Home, Guzman!” There’s also even a heart drawn on there and he knows it was Nadia’s. 

“You made my favorite,” he murmurs to her, his mouth already salivating at the thought of digging into what he knew were three layers of moist chocolate cake with layers of dark chocolate ganache and coffee mousse in between. This was just one of the things he had missed about her while she had been gone. 

“Of course.” She pecks him against his temple and hands him a knife. 

As they settle in with a large piece of cake to share, Guzman realizes this is just one of the many quiet moments they’ll get to have. This was the start of their lives together and he was so at peace, finally home. 

Home with Nadia.

[glenncoco4]

You Can Count On Me

A/N: Chapter 5

••••

She steps off the dirt path and onto the small dock. Her presence doesn’t even effect him, which is concerning. “I thought I’d find you here.”

He doesn’t have the energy to respond, his thoughts are swirling and the anxiety he’s been having about this situation is bubbling to the surface more and more each day, especially because of her. His cerulean blues stay focused on the ripples of the water surrounding his feet.

Kicking off her flip-flop, the brunette takes a seat next to him on the old dock, putting her bare feet in the cool pond water right along side his. She turns to look at him, wondering what’s going on inside his head and for a moment as the sun illuminates is silhouette, something inside her heart shifts. “Why’d you run off like that?” 

“I guess I just got a little bit overwhelmed by it all.”

“All of what?”

“The thought of going off to college and making something of myself.”

She huffs a laugh, shaking her head in disbelief.

Marty quickly whips his head around, affronted by his best friend’s reaction. “I’m glad you’re enjoying my misery.”

She scoots closer to him, encircling his forearm with her own arms. “No, Marty its not...I’m laughing because you obviously haven’t been paying attention to what I’ve been saying for the past 7 years.”

“Enlighten me.”

“Don’t you realize what you mean to your mom, to my parents...to me? Marty, you’ve already made something of yourself. You are the kindest, funniest and best person I know. You changed my life; you’ve changed so many people’s lives.”

“Really?”

A soft smile crosses her features at the childlike hope in his cerulean blues. “Hey, have I ever lied to you before?”

“No.”

“Exactly. And I never will.” She states matter of factly before leaning her head against his shoulder, soaking in the beautiful glow of the setting sun cascading across the water with the person who makes her feel so safe it’s kinda ridiculous. 

The tension in his body slowly ebbs away at his best friend’s words as the scent of lavender beautifully assaults his nose. Taking a deep calming breath, he leans his head against hers, knowing that whatever life throws at him, she’ll be there. He can count on that. “I know.”

••••

Stepping of the dirt trail and onto the old dock like she’s done so many times before, the brunette takes in the picture before her. There he is, clothes tattered, scars across his beautiful face, but he’s alive and that’s all that matters. 

He turns around already feeling her presence ease the tension away from his battered body. His sorrowful blue eyes meet those of sweetly intense brown and the shine that glistens in them. Shaking his head in defeat, he realizes how close he had come to never seeing her again. 

Kensi doesn’t give him a chance to say anything before she’s closing the distance between them, throwing her arms around him, she’s able to relax for the first time in four months. “You’re safe.”

His body clings to hers, hands grasping at her shirt feeling as though they can’t get close enough. That lavender scent that is so uniquely her fills his nostrils, immediately bringing him a sense of self. She’s here. He’s here. They’re here together and that’s all that matters. “Yeah, for now.”

“I thought you were dead.”

“Not yet. Maybe tomorrow.”

She pulls back, a cross between anger and hurt written across her features. “Don’t.”

“Sorry.” The blonde apologizes, regretting his words the moment they left his lips. 

Without thinking, her finger finds the red scrape on his cheek. “Are you okay?”

The feel of her skin against his brings back memories of that night a few months ago. He wants that again so bad. So bad he can almost taste it, but there’s something he has to take care of before he can even think about moving forward with her. “I’ll be better when I catch Lazik.”

“Woah. Woah. Woah. What do you mean when you catch Lazik?”

“I have to finish this, Kens.”

Seeing the determination set in his soulful blue eyes she knows there’s no stopping him, but she’ll be damned if he thinks she’s going to stand idly by. “No, we have to finish this.”

“I suppose I could use some backup.” He smirks, earning a playful nudge from his partner. 

••••

A resounding gasp fills the agents ears as the tech operator discovers who the third vehicle belongs to. “Car’s registered to Dale John Sully.”

Kensi tilts her head back against the head rest in exasperation when Eric confirms that her best friend’s undercover persona is indeed inside the warehouse, putting his life in even more danger than before. “Callen, that’s Marty’s alias.”

The team leader shakes is head wondering why he’s so surprised that the detective is indeed in another sticky situation. “Your boy just loves trouble, doesn’t he.”

She stares at the roof of the car for a minute, thinking about Callen’s words. “It’s funny, cuz when we were growing up, it was always the other way around.”

“Kens, I’m not so sure this is a good idea.” Marty looks around the backyard nervously as his best friend pulls out the power saw from her dad’s tool shed. 

“What are you talking about? It’s just a little tree house.”

“Yeah, but what’s your dad gonna say when he catches us with his power tools?”

The brunette begins to pull out the sawhorse before turning around to meet the 13 year old’s worried eyes.“He’s not gonna catch us and you’re not gonna tell him either.”

He feels a unfamiliar thud in his heart when the challenging spark in her mismatched orbs meet his.“Has anyone ever told you how cute you are when you’re homicidally angry?”

“In fact they have and he was never seen again.” 

Taking a deep breath, Kensi focuses on the here and now. Rescuing Marty’s ass, just so she can kill him herself for going in alone. “So what’s the plan?”

••••

The bald man turns to meet Dale’s eyes, a dark smirk playing at the corner of his lips. “You are surprised I have a wife?”

A shiver runs down his spine. “Everybody’s gotta have somebody, right?” The blonde answers as a sense of warmth and dread swarm through his body at the thought of his person, his somebody, his Kensi and how close they are to having at what he hopes will be forever. 

••••

Callen watches as the shaggy blonde, presses the muzzle of the gun forcefully against the dirty cops jaw. “Deeks, look, he’s not worth it.”

Marty ignores the team leader’s statement as his anger continues to take control of his body. “Ask me again. Ask it again!”

Kensi watches on as a side of her best friend that she’s never seen before takes over. Thinking of how he would deal with this situation if their roles reverse, she does the only thing that would certainly bring her out of her rage. “Marty. Marty, put it down.”

As soon as his name leaves her lips a calmness washes over him and it suddenly hits him that she was there to witness what just happened. He empty’s the camber of the gun handing it off to the guys before looking for the nearest way out. 

Seeing the frantic look of turmoil in her best friend’s eyes, Kensi places her hand against his chest, trying to bring him some sort of relief. 

He shakes his head, trying to school his features as much as he can and does the one thing that never seems to work when it comes to her, not that he would want it to. He walks away from her without a word. 

Finding a clear spot against the ally wall, Marty leans against the brick, sliding down until his ass his the hard concrete. He brings his knees up to his chest, burrowing his head into them as he finally lets his tears fall. The anger he’s been holding onto for so long, the pure shit that was this case and the most beautiful moment he’s ever experienced in his life all swimming around in his head. 

He’s not sure how long it is before the familiar sound of her footfalls hit his ears. He doesn’t look up, doesn’t acknowledge her presence.

“Hey, are you okay?” She chastises herself for asking such a stupid question. Of course he’s not okay. She’s seen him come out of some pretty deep covers, but this one seems to be affecting him more than any other. Kneeling down in front of him, her hands find his, trying to once again comfort him the way she always has. 

“I’d be better if everyone just left me alone.”

The bite in his voice tells her one thing, his walls are up and considering the emotional state he’s in right now, they won’t be coming down any time soon...even for her. She stands back up, shaking her head in frustration. “Understood.”

The sound of her footfalls getting further and further away finally draw him out of his “cage,” realizing that she’s not going to fight him right now even though she knows its what he needs. He can feel the strain in his throat as her silhouette gets smaller and smaller. “Kens...” He sighs in defeat as she quickly turns the corner. 

This day keeps getting shittier and shittier. 

••••

He brings his fist up to tap on the piece of wood once more, but just as he does it’s pulled open. A set of mesmerizingly mysterious eyes are suddenly staring back at him, leaving him at a loss for words. “I-“

“I thought you wanted to be alone.”

“I did, but...”

“But what?”

She’s upset, actually upset doesn’t seem to be the right word for what he sees staring back at him. Ever since they were kids he’s imagined this moment in so many different ways, this wasn’t really one of them. “I-I wanted to tell you that after that night we had...I never meant for it to happen.”

Kensi can feel her heart split into two at his words. The thought of this...them..of what they could be, it’s all suddenly gone. All the fight she thought was inside her has dissipated. She won’t let herself cry. She won’t. “O-oh, yeah, right. I-I understand.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, you were probably just in the heat of the moment and didn’t want to hurt my-“

Before she can finish her sentence, his lips are on hers, cutting her off. His hands come up, cradling her face, kissing her with such passion and reverence that it would put a Nicholas Sparks movie to shame. 

Their tongues duel as if its their last moments on earth and this is goodbye. It’s a few minutes later when they have to pull back, both panting as the rise and fall of their chests brush against each other. “What was that?” 

“It seems as though I’m not so good with the words, so I had to resort to other tactics.”

“Not that I didn’t enjoy those tactics, but you know you can tell me anything, Marty.”

“I know. I know. It’s just, laying it all there and saying the words out loud...to you, I-“

“Deeks, what is it?”

At the sound of his last name leaving her lips, he knows he better get to the point and stop being circuitous. It’s now or never. Chips on the table. All in. Taking one last calming breath, his hand finds itself back on her jaw, the feel of her skin against his sends a shock wave through his body. Conveying everything he possibly can in his eyes, he says what’s been sitting on the tip of his tongue and in some part of his head for 20 years now. “I’ve always wanted this one specific thing in life and I didn’t realize until recently what it was. I want you, Kens. I want you and me...I want us. You’re so much more than my best friend. You’re everything to me, Kensi and I’m so far past being in love with you.”

As his confession washes over her, everything stands still as her broken heart slowly mends itself together. This is so not what she was expecting tonight. “You-you love me?”

“I do.” His lips rise into a small smile. “I think the night we made love made me realize it even more.”

He watches as an unreadable look crosses her face as if she’s trying to size him up before turning around and walking further into her apartment. Seeing as though she doesn’t slam the door in his face, he follows her in, quickly shutting the door and becomes confused when he doesn’t see her sitting on the couch. 

The brunette follows his movements as he walks further into the living room before she makes her next move. Coming up behind him, she spins his body around and pushes him onto the couch. Straddling his lap, she presses her heat against his. His arms immediately wrapping around her waist loving the feel of her body against his as her movements quickly bringing his member to life. 

Slowly moving in, a soft blissful smile spreads to her face as her intense mismatched orbs dance with passion. “I’m in love with you, too.”

[catxsnow]

REPLACED

Summary: Bruce might have adopted a bunch of children, but that didn’t mean all of them were ready to take on the mantle of Robin.

Batfam x reader 

Warning: angst, self-depreciation, Damian being a demon-spawn  

A/n: I’ve learned when I’m feeling depressed I write depressing so here we are. 

GIF not mine

Word count: 2.4k

You struggled a lot in your life.

Bruce Wayne found you after the death of your mother. Your father had never been apart of your life and without your mom, you had no one. Just like he had done with the Dick, Jason, Tim, Steph, he had taken you into his home with open arms. It was a big adjustment, one that took you years to get used to.

He trained you to be the next Robin, but fighting was something that you could never grasp. No matter how much he pushed you, had patience with you, and spent hours upon hours training, you felt as if you were never going to be enough to get on the streets. You felt weak, pathetic that you couldn't be as good as the rest before you.

And then Damian came into the picture. He was trained from such a young age that he was far better than you and he was years younger than you were. It made you feel even worse about your skills. Before you could even get your chance as Robin, Damian had taken the title from right under your feet.

That was your breaking point. For years you forced yourself to not give up. You thought that maybe if you pushed yourself to your limits that you would reach the point that you could go out there. You were wrong. The moment Damian showed up at the Wayne Manor, you had finally given up.

Maybe it was for the best. If you had to train for that long, just to be able to go on patrol a few nights a week then maybe it was best that you never got your chance.

It broke Bruce's heart to see you give up.

He always wanted what was best for you. No matter how much he yelled at you and pushed you down, he did it because he wanted you to stay safe. Not once did he ever give up on you because you had never lost faith in him. Damian showing up ruined that.

It wasn't just his abilities that towered over yours, it was his teasing. He knew he was better than you and it made sure that you knew it. Damian put you down, mocked your skills, and pushed your to your mental breaking point. You didn't think he realized the damage he was doing until you broke down in the cave.

“What benefit does she even bring to the team, father? You’ve been trying her for years and she hasn’t even come close to making it the being Robin,” Damian harshly spoke. He said many more things about you, things that no one should ever hear about themselves. 

Damian was talking to Bruce about you, wondering why you were there if you never even made it out on the streets. His words tore through your chest - useless, weak, pathetic - all the things you already felt. You were sparring with Tim at the time, Damian must have thought that you couldn't hear.

Tim heard too.

He saw you pause in the middle of your training. Standing there with your shoulders slumped and tears in your eyes. He stopped, hearing what you were hearing and understanding why you were like this. The only reason that you were even down there, was because even after you told Bruce you wanted to give up, he asked you to at least keep yourself enough on your toes that if something were to happen to you, you could protect yourself against a common thug.

Tim tried to stop you from running off, he wanted to tell you not to listen to what he was saying but it was too late. You were already storming off, tears streaming down your cheeks. Thankfully, neither Bruce nor Damian noticed your exit - as far as they knew, you hadn't heard a thing.

Bruce was yelling at Damian when you left, angered that he would say these things about you. You might not have been the best fighter on the team but you were still part of it. Even if that meant that you were the one stay back and stay on comms or stitch them up when they got back. You were a part of the team just as much as the rest of them.

Damian wasn't able to see that. He was just a kid, as much as he didn't want to be seen as one. He didn't understand the human emotion at that age, especially being the way that he was raised. You knew that you should have taken that into account but it didn't make his words hurt even left.

You left to your room. The tears wouldn't stop, everything that he was saying was your worst insecurities spoken in truth. Everyone knew that you were self conscious about your skills, but they also knew that you were trying your best and that was what mattered the most. Damian didn't know that.

For years, you felt older than you actually were, it was a quality that was picked up by every child in that house hold. However, laying there on your bed crying your eyes out? You felt like the teen that you were. Filled with sadness, loss of hope, you didn't think you would ever find your place.  

You cried and cried until no more tears would come out. Knees tucked to your chest and staring at the wall with lifeless eyes, you felt like the disappointment that you always thought you were.

"(Y/N)," there was a knock at your door. It sounded like Tim, but you couldn't be sure over the sound of your sniffles.

Weakly, you replied back, "go away."

"(Y/N), I'm not leaving until you let me in," You knew for sure that it was Tim. He was the only one to see you run off so upset. Tim was always a good older brother to you. He understood the struggle of not being able to be as strong as Dick or Bruce, but where he lacked strength, he made up with in skill. You had neither, at least not enough of either.

Reluctantly, you allowed him to come in. Tim saw you curled up on your bed, eyes red and puffy. He joined you on your bed, wrapping his arms around you. You thought that you had no more tears to shed but the second you crashed into his arms, they spilled again.

"Don't listen to him," Tim rubbed your back. Age wise, you were the closet to him which made it easier to get along. Tim always seemed to take your side no matter the circumstance. "Damian has been training since he was a child, you've only been here a few years. That doesn't make you less worthy than him.

"In fact, just by showing that you've never given up proves that your better than he'll ever be. You're willing to learn, to improve, Damian has reached an arrogance that makes him thinks he has no more to learn," Tim tried to comfort you. "You can't give up now, I know you already talked to Bruce but -"

"But nothing, Tim," you shook your head, pulling away from him. "Damian's right, I'm not cut out for this, I never have been. We both know if I ever go out there, the whole time everyone is going to be worrying about me and the job isn't going to get done. Bruce might have made me family but I'm not meant to be under the wing of Batman."

"That's not true," Tim argued. He wished that you could see how much you had improved. He wished that you could see that you were just as valid of a member of this family. You were important to everyone there - even to Jason who rarely liked to admit that he tolerated anyone in that family.

"But it is, we both know it, we've always known it."

><

You wished that you were strong enough to not sulk around the manor for the next week but that wasn't the case. Damian's words were really tying you down and nothing was able to get out of your rut.

Tim tried to help in every way he knew how. He would bring you your favourite drink when the two of you got back from class, he even tried to bake you cookies. You appreciated his efforts, you really did, but this wasn't something that could be fixed with material items.

By the end of the week, Bruce finally picked up on how you were feeling. You had done your best to avoid him but when he cornered you in the library, you knew that there was no escaping him.

"(Y/N)," Bruce called out to you. World's best detective was going to see through you facade in a matter of seconds. It was time to face him, you knew you had to. Maybe this was what you needed: tell him how you felt about Damian's arrival. "You've been MIA for a week, what's going on?"

He didn’t even know that you heard what Damian said about you. What a joke. 

"Damian is what's going on," you suddenly felt this sudden rage fill your body. This wasn't like you, you were never an angry person. "Damian shows up in the middle of fucking nowhere and you treat him like he's some kind of-of god! I've been here for years, he hasn't even been here for two months and you replaced me with him. For godsake Bruce you let him take my place as Robin before I even got the chance!"

Your voice continued to raise as you spoke. Bruce had never seen you like this - the anger that rose a fire in your eyes and fists tight at your sides. He knew that Damian's arrival wasn't necessarily ideal in their plan for the future but he couldn't change what it was now.

“We’ve talked about this. I’d rather you be stuck training for years then dead on the streets because you weren’t ready,” Bruce tried to argue. The situation was less than ideal but he didn’t even put in the extra effort to try and change it. 

“That isn’t the point!” You yelled. “I don’t give two shits that I’m not ready. I don’t care that I’m not as naturally equipped as the others. You gave up on me along time before I gave up on myself. You replaced me because that was easier than facing me!” 

"(Y/N), calm down, you're starting to sound like Jason," Bruce tried to get you to lower your voice. He had known the pain that Jason felt when Tim took his place after his death and you were starting to say the exact same things that he was saying when he was in that same place.

"Is that such a bad thing?" Your voice still echoed through the large library. "Maybe Jason was right. Maybe this family is too fucked up to ever amend. Maybe he was right to leave and never look back! You let Damian say those things about me and you never did jackshit about it! What kind of father does that prove you to be?"

Bruce looked taken aback by your words. You always appreciated him taking you in, but there were some lines that he had crossed that you couldn't forgive him for. This was one of them - the betrayal that you felt when he took sides over his son he didn't even know existed against you.

Bruce’s silence said more than any string of words could.

With a huff of air, you pushed past Bruce and out of the library. Maybe Bruce was the reason that you were never able to reach your potential as Robin. Maybe he never took you to the same level that he took with the boys and with Steph. Maybe it was Bruce Wayne that never wanted you to make it to being a vigilante.

The idea had never crossed your mind before, but the more you thought about it, the more you thought it to be true. You felt as if you were always missing pieces of training - moves that Tim was able to do and you couldn't, tactics that Dick would come up with, even using weapons like Jason when he was Robin. There were so many things that you could never do.

The thought of him sabotaging your success just made you even more angry than you were before. In that moment, you wanted nothing more than to be Robin, you wanted to be a better hero than Bruce, Dick, and everyone that came before you. You wanted to prove everyone wrong.

You hadn't realized that you walk of anger had led you to the gardens. The sun was just setting and through your red vision, you had to stop and admire the beautiful orange and purple skies that shone through the trees. The sight had calmed you instantly, and you stood there to watch the sun finish setting.

Dick was the one to show you how pretty they were in the gardens. It was when you first arrived at the manor, upset about your mother's death. he tried to make you feel better with the view and it had worked. You always thought of your mother when the sun set after that, it was a reminder she was still there with you.

"(L/N)," you hadn't realized how long you had been watching it. The smallest glimpse of light was left and darkness began to cover the yard. You were surprised to see that it was Damian standing next to you. Since his arrival, you avoided having a full conversation with him. "Father told me to come apologize to-"

"I don't want your apology, Damian," you looked down at him. He seemed relieved that he didn't have to do it, but even more so confused. Just as the last bit of light left the sky you fully faced him. Damian watched as your face grew with determination.

"I want you to make me a lethal weapon."

[cutiepatoodie]

Floo Powder and Charades P.1

Y/N floo’s to the Burrow after a massive fight with their mother, they find themselves in the middle of the weekly Weasley family game night

Pairing: Fred Weasley x GN Reader

Warnings: abusive mother, angst, also tooth-rotting fluff

Word Count: 2k 

Cross posted on ao3

You slam your door and crumple into a ball, silent sobs wracking your small body as you fight to keep them back. The urge to scream rises in your throat and you fight it back, tamping down on your fear to better hide from her. But it doesn’t seem to matter, you can hear footsteps pounding up the stairs, heavily beating in time with your rabbit-like pulse, closing in on your bedroom. And you can feel it automatically kick in, mind working to calculate how long you have before she reaches you, whether you can escape, where you can escape but-

“Y/N L/N get your ungrateful ass down here you little shit.” And you can hear her heavy breaths, dragged in through bared teeth, lips curled in a snarl. “Don’t walk away from me when I’m talking to you.”

And you almost want to laugh because this seems like anything but talking.

“After everything, I've done for you and you have the gall to disrespect me? Get out here filthy bitch!” The door rattles as her heavy-handed fist fights to twist the doorknob, violently slamming it back and forth as the locking mechanism holds true. “Open the goddamn door or else I'm knocking it down myself!” 

Stumbling away from your door you know that there is no escape. Your mom is going to force her way in no matter what you do to stop her. Fresh waves of tears were making rivers down your cheeks but the idea of wiping them seemed too exhausting, mind already resigned to your inevitable fate. Blearily looking around you remembered the small box you kept on the mantle on the other side of your room that Ron had given you for your birthday. Instinct takes over and struggling to overcome your leaden feet you rise, stumbling to the boarded-up fireplace. Your hands grip the wood and try to pry the boards away, mind desperately catching onto the sliver of hope. This was your only chance to get out of this house. Having to go to Azkaban for improper use of magic at this point seemed better than staying locked up in her house. 

The banging on your door was getting louder and more repetitive and as your nails scrabble to find purchase on the aging wood, digging in with the strength of survival fueled desperation. Finally, after what felt like forever you hear a crack and one of the boards break giving you more leverage to take down the rest and you clear just enough for you to climb through.

“What’s all that noise in there? Y/N open the fucking door.” And finally, the lock gives way with a groan as your mother bursts inside, hair tangled and chest heaving, flexing with rage and fury. This is it, she’s finally going to kill me this time. The small box heavy in your hands is the only thing grounding you. The thought of your mother crossing into the only place in the house you felt remotely safe from her taunts and screaming makes your chest tighten, breath leaving your lungs in a panicked whoosh. You can barely feel your fingers as they fumble with the box’s delicate clasp revealing the small amount of glittering powder inside. Throwing the powder into the hearth you choke out a small “the burrow” before being zapped into the floo network. 

And even before the flames have properly cleared you can smell farmland, the rich, earthy scent of hay, grass, and freshly turned soil laden underneath the softer scent of warm vanilla, cinnamon and something uniquely home. There were so many voices. Blending together, some words appearing clearer than others. 

“Not knowing how to dance!”

“Good one Georgie but I’d say He’s outrunning a Moose!”

“Maybe he’s trying to swat a fly?”

“What if Dad’s trying to play quidditch?”

“It’s probably some muggle thing anyway. Do you know what he’s on about Harry?”

“Uhhh, it could be… Y/N?” Harry yells, astonished, while looking straight at the fireplace where his friend had just appeared. 

“What do you mean Harry? Y/N is staying with their mother over the break.” Hermione is quick to reply as silence falls over the living room. Everyone turns towards the fireplace to see you caught like a deer in headlights, disheveled and unexpected in the Weasley’s living room. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t know where else to go. I can floo back home. You know what nevermind, I can just leave. Where do you keep the Floo Powder?” You were rambling now going off apologizing for coming in unannounced. You know your voice is cracking and fighting against the fresh sting of tears that prickle at your eyes.

“Oh, don’t worry darling you can be on the twin’s team. Arthur was just about to tell us if we had won or not.” Molly’s voice is so soft and comforting. She gestures to the open spot between her and Fred in front of the couch. Without much thought, your legs bring you there sitting down, back pressed to Hermione’s legs as she reaches down to put a kind hand on your shoulder. Molly pats your knee with reassurance and the game continues. 

“All of you were wrong, I was swimming!” Arthur announces, pleased to have won the round. 

“If that’s how you swim it’s no wonder we never go to the beach.” Fred chortles, clutching his stomach and leaning into George for support. The familiar tug of a smile pulls at your lips and soon enough you are laughing the tension out of your muscles. As the beams from the setting sun started to cast a peachy pink glow around the room Molly stands up and excuses herself and Arthur to start putting dinner together. A familiar tension grew thick in the room. No one wants to be the one to bring it up but everyone is thinking it so Ron finally speaks up. 

“Who’s up for a quick scrimmage in the backyard before dinner? We’ve probably got another two hours before the sun sets.” The seven of you make your way to the shed in the back yard to grab the brooms. Upon reaching the doors Harry pulls you aside. 

“Hey, I know I’m not the best with feelings but… if you need anything, from any of us, we’re here.” Harry awkwardly pats you on the back, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. 

“Thanks, Harry, but really I’m okay. I’m just stressed about that potions project Snape assigned for us to have done when we come back in April and I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t the only one going crazy over it.” You let out a breathy laugh and Harry can see that the smile plastered on your face in no way reaches your eyes. He looks at you, seeming to weigh the worth of calling you on your shit before relenting with a huff. “Yeah Snape never misses a chance to be a damn prick.” You know that he doesn’t believe you, but it does not matter since he’s not pushing it. 

The teams were decided, Ginny, Ron, and Harry, against you and the twins. Hermione was reffing and made sure to agree to settle any fight that came up over scorekeeping. The three on three went on for about an hour before Fred caused a distraction so that you could catch the snitch. Returning down to earth your knees buckled and you decided to lay on your back for a bit before standing up again. Everyone followed suit, laying in the fresh grass covered in drying sweat and a few scrapes and bruises. 

“I can’t believe we beat the famous Potter in a game Y/N. You have to tell Cedric that when you go back to practice.” Fred said, lazily punching your shoulder. You didn’t mean to flinch. It was an accident but by how tense Fred was on the grass beside you, it was obvious he had noticed. 

“If you’re going to ask if I’m okay, just don’t. You did nothing wrong, okay Freddie?” Your voice felt distant as you tried to reassure the lanky beanpole to your left. You sat up feeling a bit more clear headed and yelled. “I call the first shower!” before running back into the comfort of the Burrow. 

The water rolled off your body as your muscles finally were able to relax. The familiar sounds and smells of the Burrow were doing wonders for your anxiety. You poured some soap into the palm of your hand and absentmindedly scrubbed dirt from your skin. While washing your mind began to wander through the events of the day. Thoughts of your mother tried to creep back in but suddenly there was a banging on the door as it swung open. 

“Close the curtain Y/n I need to take a leak and Georgie is taking forever downstairs.” Fred called before the sound of a zipper rang through the bathroom. Your heart was pounding as you tried to bring yourself back to the world around you. The toilet flushed and the sound of the sink was barely audible through the beating of your heart. The doorknob started to turn and before your brain could catch up the words were out of your mouth. 

“Can you stay?” It came out so softly Fred could have sworn he made it up. His cheeks dusted pink and thank goodness for the obnoxious shower curtain Molly insisted on putting in their bathroom which covered him from your gaze. He cautiously sat on the toilet seat afraid that if he made too much noise you’d try to push him away again. 

“Do you want me to ask around for some clothes you can change into? I mean if it were me I wouldn’t want to put my quidditch clothes back on.” Fred scratched the back of his neck staring down at the floor. 

“Oh yeah I didn’t even think that far ahead to be honest. I mean if it's okay just like a hoodie and a pair of shorts would be awesome. I’m almost done in here anyway.” Your voice sounded more like you than it had all day. Fred released a breath he did not realize he was holding. He just wanted you to feel safe. 

“Yeah of course! I’ll uhh go and grab some clothes and a towel and uhh yeah meet you back downstairs when you're dressed is that okay? I know that you wanted me to stay but I kind of have to leave if you want me to get ya some clothes. Or I mean I can always text Gin and see if she can bring some….” Fred devolved into muttering about what the most effective way to grab you some clothes and not leave you alone longer than is comfortable. 

“Freddie it’s okay, I’m not going to break. Your room is right across the hall and I already have a towel in here with me.” Hearing the teasing smile in your voice calmed down his nerves. Why did he feel so nervous anyways. You had been around the burrow for a while and it shouldn’t be making him this nervous. With a quick be right back he slipped out of the door. Grabbing a pair of shorts and his newest Christmas sweater his mother knitted for him last year he padded back to the bathroom. The water wasn’t running anymore so he figured he probably should just set the clothes outside.

“Hey Y/n I’m just gonna put these outside the door. So uhh whenever you're ready I'll see you downstairs.” He placed the clothes in a neat pile and scuttled to the head of the stairs. 

Pulling Fred’s sweater over your head made you feel way calmer than you first had expected to. It was warm and cozy and smelled of firewood and smores. It was quite big on you but that did not matter. Drying your hair one last time with the towel you left the bathroom hearing the voices of your friends from all the way down on the main floor. A smile spread to your lips knowing that no matter what happened next did not matter because right now you felt safe.