#watching a video allow me to ramble
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the-acid-pear · 1 year ago
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Seeing your own trans body and identity as your masterpiece is so important
#luly talks#watching a video allow me to ramble#almost feel like a ringmaster walking in on stage like ladies and gentlemen what you are about to see is something you have never seen befo#when you think about it its not surprising at all that theres such an overlap with autism and queerness#gender is such a thing we are forced to learn and stick to and sometimes we arent even directly taught it usually you just have to go figur#like many social things it is treated as a survival of the fittest a lot of the time#reminds me of my experiences growing up and my insistance of not being a boy or a girl but simply luly#speaking of me. there's something about me that is so strong like. my inability to ever separate the me from myself#no matter where i go or what my body does theres a lingering feeling of the me floating there#this is stepping away from gender and more into dissociation but it would be foolish to ignore the overlap between those two#after all one of the times i was having this. mental breakdown inducing dissociative episode i shared with an aquitance they were like#oh so you are genderfluid. and i was like yeah i guess#there's such an ambiguous sense of the self#HOLY ALMOST LMAO#anyway um. like back to the gender tho#saw this manga panel of this nonbinary beauty as the youtuber called where they say they gave up on being a man but dont claim to be a woma#and it makes me think of myself because i did do that in a way too didnt i?#i gave up on being a woman. but i partly claim to be a man?#but not all the way. not at all.#i've thought about me being a trans man and i am not. i am more than a man#i dont reject womanhood either#i still carry it with me. i once was a little girl.#lately ive been thinking about identity#and i really think that the worst one can do is forget their past because when you do that there's nothing left for you#honestly applies to identities in general such as the idenitty of a nation too#its important to remember how you got here because that is who you are#if you forget your mistakes you are doomed to repeat them again and again#of course. this is an issue for people like me. bc i deal with certain dissociative and general memory issues#lately i've been gaining more memories i thought lost tho. little things. faces of friends of teachers#popping up in my dreams clear as photographs
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theindependenttrentcrimm · 11 months ago
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I see your ‘house and Wilson are inevitably just very fucked up, the only reason they work so well is that they are both unhinged and it wouldn’t be right to subject anyone else to them’ and raise you ‘they are intimately capable of soft love and I think would be able to give it to each other- quick kisses, smiles etc. however they also need a level of prank and mental enrichment that they can only ever get from each other’
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hyperfocusthusly · 2 months ago
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If anyone needs me I’ll be under seven blankets watching Mike Mic’s PLL deep dive for the 17th time
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kindaorangey · 19 hours ago
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as far as audio/visual digital stuff is concerned i think part of the reason people romanticise the past so much is a very genuine anxiety about perfection. a fuzzy camera lens or botched audio is cringe and offputting, but when you frame it as something retro, the imperfections come across as deliberate and become integral to the aesthetic
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chibishortdeath · 7 months ago
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Hmmm I kinda want to make a side blog for RPG Maker game development related things to be able to talk to more experienced people in that community, but at the same time I both don’t really think I’d get much attention and don’t want to accidentally spoil my own game (^^ ; ).
I have a rough story, concept doodles, a tileset, some character sprites, an enemy that walks around but can’t initiate battle yet (if I even decide to have a battle system), a couple rooms with some events, and a functioning run button, but I’m still lost on how to do much else at the moment. Especially since this program has the ability for scripting, meaning I’ll probably have to learn and actually retain another coding language.
So, I’m not very far at all lol. Idk how well that’d go over on the established fandom website, but eh.
#text post#incoherent rambling#project update#game project#I’m still also debating whether or not I can actually even make a proper horror game too#It’s the rule of like just being a horror fan doesn’t make you good at horror being afraid of something does? ya know?#I am trying to go with things that scare me personally but it’s been difficult#either things aren’t concrete of concepts enough or are wayyyy too oddly specific to make anything about#which is quitter talk I know but how does one translate the childhood heebee jeebees of watching top ten gaming videos past bedtime 💀💀💀#or like the way too broad general fear of lack of control without making it too on the nose or too vague#truly a balancing act writing is#kinda ironically I am also a little bit less afraid of hospitals after having been to one for myself rather than family members#which makes things both more and less difficult???#on one hand I have better references for them now but on the other hand I’m desensitized to it 😔#I think I get used to things a little too easily for a lot of things to stay scary#the thing was a scary movie the first time I saw it and now it’s a comfort film#funger was a very scary game until I first died and reloaded a save with little consequence and now it’s just a spooky but fun rpg#but then at the same time thinking about a movie studio logo before a movie that scared me as a kid cause there was a monster in it#still gives weird left over shivers but actually seeing it doesn’t anymore for some reason#I feel like that’s how it’s worked with most things I’ve ever been afraid of in my life besides concepts like death control or idk drowning#ugh writing is HARD#but actually making a functional and fun to play game is harder oh my god do I not know how to make puzzles#I have made swivel chairs that can be knocked and walked over but that’s about it and idk what to do with that knowledge lmaooooo#and I don’t want the entire gameplay loop to be read text search room get key repeat cause that’s boring#I have also desperately tried making a stamina system but there’s not much help with that online especially not in the rpg maker forums#the no necroposting rule sucks all the threads for questions I have never get answered and never will cause no one is allowed to due to age#anyway idk what to tag this probably won’t get seen since it’s not my usual anyway but eh whatever I’ll think about this#hopefully I remember the passwords to two blogs 💀💀💀
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ladye-zelda · 8 months ago
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Sealed Princess AU is running rampant in my head
Except I am too burnt out to do anything with it 😞
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girlkomaeda · 7 months ago
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thinking about replaying all the danganronpa games and reading more of the novels and spin offs n stuff…
#I’m always thinking about komahina and komaeda but it’s been a while since I was actively into danganronpa itself… I’m feeling the urge now#honestly I never finished dr3 anime because I didn’t like it 😭😭😭I know everything that happens in it I just never finished the last 4 episo#bc I got ultra depression and couldn’t watch anything for a while when I was 15#I did actually like most of dr3 but there were like just a few things I didn’t like#I don’t remember why so I’m curious if I’ll feel differently about it now. I also didn’t like some of komaedas characterization#I liked most of komaedas characterization but I also felt like they used him for fan service too much. not talking about the shower scene#that was just funny and awesome. I love komaeda sexualization#I remember not liking him blowing the gym up or whatever bc I felt like it was more fan service than anything. but that’s just my opinion#and it’s been so long so maybe when I rewatch it I’ll feel differently who knows#I just felt like thag part was kind of silly and didn’t make much sense. it felt like just fanswrbeice like here’s Komaeda blowing somethin#up like ok thanks. I guess. like it’s not even completely out of character really I just didn’t like it#also honestly I got so into komaeda at some point that seeing him made me feel ill I can’t explain it. like I got sick seeing people talk#about him or make videos about him or mention him… it was crazy#even now I still get stressed out to an unreasonable degree when people from my pov mischaracterize him or stray too far from my specific#headcanons like it’s not super healthy LOL but I think I’m allowed to be super insane about at least one gay anime boy ok#I’m better at recognizing when I’m being unreasonable now though… I respect some different interpretations… sometimes#damn this ramble paragraph might be proof that i should not get actively back into danganronpa itself
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harmonizewithechoes · 1 year ago
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#so it’s late and I’m intoxicated and interested in sharing a secret that sober me would prefer I not share#but she needs to be more vulnerable and right now in this time the alcohol helps#just as a precursor- I’m a lightweight so I really haven’t had that much and I’ll be fine in the morning and also#my partner has a weird schedule and once or twice a week we like to have a drink or two and play video games or watch a show together#lately it’s been baldurs gate but tonight it’s coop stardew#anywayyyy~#sober Becca is too shy to say that she’s struggling a lot right now#I’ve been hiding myself away for a LOT of reasons for quite a while now and focusing on being the best mother/partner/homemaker I can be#but this has been detrimental to my friendships and spiritual life#as far as friendships go I feel like since I haven’t had the capability to be a really good friend to anyone since everything happened with#happened with dad*#that I shouldn’t be allowed to have friends at ALL#because if I can’t put 100% effort into my friendships even when I’m struggling I don’t deserve friends at all#but I have 3 very little kids and I’m pouring every last ounce I have into them#so maybe I can kind of have a pass and maybe I can have a friend sometimes?#as a treat?#because I love my family very much but sometimes I don’t feel like I’m a person within the family#especially during the holidays I feel like I’m merely playing the role of ‘mother’#idk…#this is rambly and doesn’t make a ton of sense#basically I’m wondering if I’m allowed to be lonely sometimes because being a mom is hard and lonely#or if I have to suck it up and wait until my kids are older to get to be a full person outside of them again#btw- this has nothing to do with them#my kids are my sunshine on the most cloudy day#they are so beautiful and wonderful and I am so happy I get to know them and guide them in life#it truly is a privilege#apparently I’m too long winded lol I just started talking about each of my children and what I adore about them#but it was too many tags and tumblr said no lol#oh well jsyk I’m crying rn because they are my pride and joy and even if I never have another friend again they are so so worth it
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gemharvest · 1 year ago
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FUUUCK I can't post it bc I don't want it spread online but there's this old video of me recording our TV when I was like 5-6 and whisper-yelling "Dragon Ball Z Kai" (pronounced like "dragon ball z kahhh" in a very rushed way) that I found while going through the old desktop's hard drive and like. It's so insanely funny I wish I could post it so fucking bad but I'd rather keep that as something only those close to me (who I trust not to post anywhere) get to see. But also that means nobody else will get it if I go "dragonballzeekahhhhhhhh" out loud. This pains me.
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just-slightly-chayotic · 1 year ago
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i think i should be forbidden from watching jeff videos. i'm going more and more insane every day
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cryptidapprentice · 6 months ago
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i was so much happier when i was getting paid to lay around and sleep all day
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arolesbianism · 10 months ago
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If you see me talking abt build plans that won't actually work keep your mouth shut I'm trying to fuck around and find out by myself over here
#rat rambles#oni posting#I have watched other ppl play oni and have watched some guides but Ive made a policy to never directly follow any build guides#by that I mean Im allowed to watch videos abt them but Im not allowed to rewatch them to help with my builds#I can use whatever random tips I remember but my memory is shit enough that I usually dont remember the finer mechanics of a build#leaving me to have to try and logic out them myself based on my knowledge of the mechanics#Im also focusing more on basic sustainability than maximum production although ideally Id like to take advantage of whatever I can#Im also just lazy and am willing to eat the extra power drain less optimized builds cost#as far as I see it if I have enough power for my generators to have significant down time then Im willing to use some extra power#now ofc this usually leads to me having massive power crisies during the mid game but I usually figure smth out eventually#now I have 4 natural gass guisers running 4 natural gass generators which I could definitely upscale if need be#but combined with my solar panels plug slugs and coal generators I think Im plenty fine for a good while#I have both large pip farms and large sage hatch farms too so I have renewable coal as well#so it I needed more power I could easily make a massive coal generator brick and build a few more natural gass generators and Id be fine#but I already have way more power than I rly need so Im going to hold off until I get more radiation research done#which I will definitely want to do to make my life easier in the long run and make the end game much easier#also hydrogen engine go brrrrr#god getting a hydrogen and oxygen cooler is going to be the death of me I dont have the brain power for this shit#but if I want to achive my goal of getting as many achievements as possible I rly should get a hydrogen rocket eventually#I say as many as possible since theres several Im already completely locked out of because I cant be bothered#like bro I started on rime I was not going to go for locovore and carnivore fuck that shit#oh also super sudtainable I was already stretching it thin with the dupe labor I had with generators I rly couldnt afford to not use them#primarily because of the struggle to get enough food production to be able to afford upscaling my population#I was very cautious abt heating up my base too much which ended up kind of backfiring on me as my food production got slowly eaten by cold#but I ended up finding two cool steam vents which I took the water from and used it to warm my base up#Im still using it to warm my base up but I've been tweaking it a bit now that the temperature is more stable and the heat is adding up#theres basically no risk of it killing my dupes but it is warming up my bristle blossom farm too much#so I've been adjusting it so that the intial heat gets dispersed into a very small peppernut farm#Im still rebuilding the piping to help manage the temperature better but Im not rushing it#I have more important things to work on especially since bristle berries are no longer my primary food source
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spectersgf · 4 months ago
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— driver's seat storm chasing 𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃
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pairing: tyler owens × reader 
summary: he was about to take off again, chase another storm, leave you worrying for hours upon hours. the least he could do was give you a parting gift.
warnings: SMUT! kinda angsty a little, cute yeehaw banter, cowgirlisms, hair pull, ass smack, titty suck. all the good stuff.
wordcount: 3.2k
a/n: watched twisters literally two days ago, had this thought, here we are. not proofread at all (as always, soz) but filled with passion (and horny)
(if you want to be tagged in future fics or if you have any requests, let me know! for my other fics, here's my masterlist!)
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"oh, you're such a prick, tyler owens!"
you were shouting at your best friend, which was a regular occurrence due to his dangerous passion. tyler was a professional 'tornado wrangler' which was his idiotic way of saying he chased tornadoes for the sake of content creation. you knew it went much deeper than that for him; this was his passion and he was smart and knew so much about storms, but that doesn't mean he wasn't stupid and reckless.
he had just come back from a particularly dangerous storm, one that left you more worried for his safety than ever before. you cried seeing him come back to town and fretted over his injuries and bruises, begging him to stop and not go again.
according to what he just told you, your begging was pointless.
he was about to take off again, chase another storm, put himself back in harm's way. leave you worrying for hours upon hours, shaking until he'd return.
"do i mean nothing to you? does my begging and pleading mean nothing?" your voice was strained but you didn't lower your volume, desperate for him to see your anguish.
"you know that's not the case, darlin', but storm chasing is my life. you know that better than anyone." his tone was much steadier than yours, and his comments were entirely reasonable. you knew how much of his time he dedicated to his passion, but that didn't stop your frustration.
"don't play that fucking card with me, ty. it's not even been 48 hours since i thought you'd died, and now you're up and leaving again!" your anger had subsided and your tone had softened, now showing vulnerability and hurt. your shoulders sagged and you turned away from him, tears that you didn't want him to see stinging your eyes.
"y/n..." his voice trailed off, unsure if he was supposed to move to comfort you or give you space.
“you don’t understand what it does to me to see you walk out that door, ty. every single time i’m stuck asking myself if today’s the day i lose my best friend. and i know you’re careful and you know your stuff and you’re basically a pro but sometimes i can’t even bring myself to watch the streams and the videos because i’m so scared.” you rambled your confession, back still turned away from him but you’d started pacing. when you finished speaking, you turned to face him, eyes pleading. “i’m not asking you to stop. i’d never ask you to quit your passion. i just wish you’d understand from my perspective.”
"i'm sorry," he started, but you knew where his apology was headed. "but i have to do this. this is my life, and i'm helping people by doing this."
your tear-filled gaze met his as he spoke, and the look of sincerity on his face made you cave, as usual. "fine, go. it's not like i could've stopped you."
you watched him pick up his hat and place it easily on his head as he turned to walk away. he opened the door but turned before heading out. "you know i love you, y/n," he said quietly, sounding almost defeated.
his words struck you but before you could say anything, he was out the door. for a couple of minutes you stood in place, stunned at his proclamation. when you finally snapped out of your shock, you walked out the door, following behind him as he walked to his truck.
it had started to rain and the water caused his shirt to stick to him like a second skin, but you didn't allow yourself any time to ogle his physique. you reached out and grabbed his arm, feeling his cold skin against your warm touch. you pulled his arm, forcing him to turn and face you as you seethed.
"love me how?" you asked, obviously distressed. the rain was making your hair to stick to your face but you didn't care; all you cared about was the man in front of you. your best friend. "love me how, tyler?"
"y/n..." for the second time today his voice trailed off after saying your name like that and it infuriated you. your face burned from embarrassment and before you had fully processed your reaction, you slapped him.
when he turned his head back to look at you again, his eyes were swimming with hurt. you loved his eyes. you hated seeing them like this. but all you could focus on was your own hurt. after years of being his best friend but craving more, and years of casual touches and flirting and cuddling and rumours in your small town, this is what it had come to. a halfway confession.
"fuck you," you spit before turning away to walk back inside.
this time, it was tyler who reached out to grab you. his big hand encased your bicep and forced you to face him again. before you could say anything, he spun you around so that you were pinned against the door of his truck.
"what the fuck is your probl–" your words were abruptly cut off when he leaned down and pressed his lips to yours. you stood still in shock for a few seconds before melting into him, one hand on the junction between his neck and shoulder, the other hand on his bicep. meanwhile, he had one hand on your waist and the other held your face, fingers splaying across your cheek and neck. you kissed him back with passion and vigour, easily letting his tongue explore your mouth for the first time.
your hands snakes upwards, pulling his hat off his head and slipping it onto yours while your free hand fisted his hair, threading your fingers through his locks. his hand trailed from your waist to your ass as he pulled away from your kiss for a second.
"you sure you wanna wear my hat, darlin'?" he panted, raising one cocky eyebrow as his eyes searched yours.
"wear the hat, ride the cowboy, right?" you asked, smirking confidently. he immediately matched your facial expression, smirking in return, but his eyes twinkled with joy and amusement.
tyler was much taller than you and evidently he was starting to see your height difference as an issue, since he brought his other hand down to your ass and lifted you, urging your legs around his waist and bringing you face to face. he kissed you again, just a quick kiss, before asking, "so, cowgirl. where are we doing this?"
"if i'm the cowgirl, are you my wild stallion?" you teased playfully, smiling as you looked at him affectionately. after seeing the fiery look in his eyes, you were unable to resist, and you pulled his mouth to yours once again, this kiss more intense than the last. you messily pulled his bottom lip into your mouth and sucked on it, followed by a gentle bite, before pulling away and desperately kissing down his neck. "i want you in your truck. driver's seat," you murmured against his skin.
before tyler was able to haul you into his truck, you detached yourself from him. once your feet were safely back on the ground, you eagerly grabbed the hem of his soaked t-shirt and peeled it off his tanned torso, shamelessly admiring his body as you did. you dragged your nails across his toned abdomen and brought your mouth to his chest, sucking and biting at his skin. you could barely register his groan, only able to focus on his body and being able to maintain skin-to-skin contact with him.
tyler pulled you away from him by gently tugging on your hair and you looked at him quizzically. "ty, what the hell?"
"enough teasing, cowgirl. time to ride the stallion," he told you, causing you both to erupt in a fit of giggles.
"never say that again, tyler," you replied, leaning up to peck him quickly.
he picked you up briefly and immediately put you down in a spot away from the driver's side door and swiftly got comfortable in his van, away from the cold rain. while he did so, you made quick work of unbuttoning your flannel shirt, leaving you in just a lacy, sheer bra and jeans. and his hat. once he was seated, tyler gave you a thorough once-over, letting out a low whistle as he did.
"somebody call for a ride?" his playful tone was supplemented by his signature cheeky smile, but you rolled your eyes at his comment.
"god, you're so fuckin' corny."
you boosted yourself into the truck, situating yourself easily on his lap. you shuffled around to get comfortable on tyler's lap and were rewarded with a strained groan. this time it was you giving him a cheeky smile followed by a quick roll of your hips over his. he placed his hands firmly on your waist, fingers dipping into your jeans and stopping your movements.
"keep that up and this'll be over before it started, sweetheart," he told you, voice strained and you could tell it was from arousal. you watched his mouth as he spoke and, unable to resist him, you leaned in and kissed him again. your almost bare chest was pressed against his and your hands roamed his skin, picking up water droplets as they went. the feel of his toned muscle under your hands caused you to moan into his mouth, turning tyler on even more.
his hands wound into your hair, all the way up to the root, and he tugged lightly. you whimpered and dragged your hips over his, and when tyler pulled away from your kiss you unconsciously followed his movement. tyler clicked his tongue in condescending disapproval but smirked at your reaction to him.
“needy for me, baby?” he asked mockingly, one hand on your hips to halt your movement again, the other still tangled in your hair.. you nodded your response, not trusting yourself to speak in your current state. “words, sweetheart. what do you need?”
you whined but when you realised he wasn’t going to do anything until you spelled it out for him, you let out an exasperated huff. “need you to fuck me.”
tyler laughed affectionately at your desperation. “there you go, sweetheart. that’s what i like to hear.” you preened from his praise, craving to receive it again. with the hand that was on your hips, he undid the button of your jeans and pulled the zipper down with a quiet hiss. instead of pulling down the restrictive fabric like you expected, he slipped his hand into your barely-existent underwear and stroked with a featherlike touch. 
“this all for me?” he asked as he dragged a finger through your arousal; you were soaked and his teasing tone was only making it worse. you dropped your head onto his shoulder and tried to slyly jerk your hips forward, though you were unable to. “patience, baby. i’ve chased this storm so long, now let me enjoy it.”
his words jolted you caused a moan to fall from your mouth. your skin was feverish despite the biting cold and you were becoming increasingly desperate. “next time, please, tyler. i need you inside me, please,” you begged, mouth against his tan skin. 
he didn’t say anything in response, only chuckled quietly to himself as he removed his hand from your underwear. he brought his hand up to your mouth and you looked him in the eye as you took one finger, the one that had been touching you, into your mouth and sucked. you bobbed your head back and forth for just a few seconds and hummed quietly around the digit in your mouth before releasing it and pulling tyler’s mouth to yours in a heated kiss, urging him to taste you from your own mouth. 
“god, if we weren’t in my truck right now i’d have my mouth on your sweet cunt,” he grumbled.
“don’t care, need your cock inside me.” without breaking your kiss, you pushed your jeans down over your hips but only to your knees. “i’m ready, you know i’m ready, what are we waiting for?” you asked frantically. you started to paw at his stupid belt but his hands covered yours, stopping you from getting to what you were craving.
“are you sure? we can’t go back after this and you know it.” his eyes were swimming with concern as he spoke, searching yours for any indication of your feelings. 
you moved one hand to his face, placing it on his cheek and stroking his cheekbone delicately with your thumb. “i want this. i have for a longass time. i’ve felt it for so long, and now i’m finally chasing it. are you chasing it with me?” your words were entirely sincere and this was obvious to tyler, especially when you looked in his eyes and deep into his soul.
“using my own words against me?” he teased, breaking the tension in a charming way that only he could pull off. “i’m with you.” his words were equally sincere, though you could sense the double meaning. you weren’t distressed by it; his way of telling you how he was feeling made your heart swell and added to your already dripping arousal.
you resumed your work on removing his belt, followed by unbuttoning his jeans and pulling the zipper. tyler could only watch cockily as you did so, both hands behind his head, muscles flexing, as he admired your naked beauty. jeans pulled down, only a sheer bra covering your breasts, and his hat on your head.
“go on, baby. take me out; it’s all yours.”
his words empowered you and you happily obliged, appreciating his quiet hiss as you made contact with his skin once again. you tunnel visioned on his thick cock in your hand, swiping your thumb over the tip and pumping it once, twice, three times. tyler watched your every moment and facial expression, and he could see you practically salivating, bringing a wide and cocky smirk to his face. “another time,” he murmured despite his better opinion of letting you take him in your mouth the way you so obviously craved. you simply nodded in agreement, seemingly in a trance as you eyed the way your smaller hand wrapped around his girth. 
the feeling of his hands on your hips gently urging you forwards and upwards snapped you out of your dreamlike state but you didn’t resist his manhandling; instead, you welcomed the way he took control of the situation. took control of you. 
before proceeding further he looked you in the eyes again, showing that same sincerity and vulnerability, silently asking ‘are you sure you’re sure?’. you smiled at the gesture, appreciative of his concern, and nodded. your eyes sparkled with excitement as you brought your bottom lip between your teeth and reached behind you to guide tyler’s hard cock into your wetness. the pair of you moaned in tandem as you sunk down on him, fitting together perfectly. 
“c’mere, cowgirl,” he murmured, voice heavy with arousal. you shifted forward with him inside you, pulling a groan from deep within his chest as he pulled you in for another kiss. the combination of his searing kiss and the way he filled you up was electrifying. your entire body moved on its own accord, as if you had come alive for the first time; your mouth worked against his and you circled your hips against his and you were consumed entirely by him. 
one of his hands pawed at your ass while the other worked on removing your bra. when he did finally get your bra unhooked, it was practically ripped off your body and thrown to the backseat. tyler’s lips reluctantly left yours but they immediately attached to your right breast, with his hand squeezing the left. he sucked a harsh mark into the flesh before his mouth circled your peaked nipple, sucking eagerly before rolling it gently between his teeth. 
“you have no idea how desperate i’ve been to get my mouth on your pretty tits, sweetheart,” he mumbled against you. his words caused your hips to stutter against his as you rode him, hitting your sweet spot and forcing a high pitched moan from you. 
“i need you to do it, ty,” you whimpered, hungry for him to take control again.
“such a good girl, telling me what you need.” his praise made you glow and you unconsciously clenched your muscles around him.
his grip on your ass tightened slightly before he slapped it, deliciously stinging your skin. you moaned and jerked forward again and your head immediately fell backwards, eyes rolling back. 
“god, y/n, you’re a walking turn on,” he moaned, hips starting to buck as he fucked into you. “you have no fuckin’ idea what you do to me. the number of times i’ve wanted to do this with you right here, audience be damned. the way i crave the taste of your sweet cunt on my tongue. having to stop myself from smacking your ass or squeezing your tits whenever you’re in those tiny bikinis or scraps of fabric that you call pyjamas. and now you’re mine and we can do all of it.”
you moaned and whimpered pathetically throughout tyler’s speech, the words that you were longing to hear from him finally being voiced while he fucked you. 
“i’m close,” you mumbled, bringing your hand to your mouth to muffle your noises. “need you to fill me up.”
his eyes squeezed shut due to your muffled words and he pulled your hand away from your mouth. “i’ll give you whatever you need, baby, but i need to hear you when i do,” he told you, linking your fingers together and resting your joined hands on his glistening chest. “cum for me, sweet girl. cum on my cock, let me feel you.”
his words tipped you over the edge and your muscles spasmed around him as you reached your climax, moaning his name as you did. tyler followed suit, filling you upon your request. 
“fuck, y/n,” he groaned, pulling your chest to his and kissing you again, sweetly this time despite your expectations.
the pair of you were a panting, sweaty mess when you both finished, but you didn’t break any of your attachments. he didn’t pull out of you, and he didn’t let you loosen your embrace.
“i guess you could say i wrangled your tornado, hm?” 
“you did not say that to me while i have your dick and cum inside me right now, tyler owens.”
“c’mon, darlin’, you obviously like my lines,” he teased, smiling sweet and sincere.
“more than just your lines. i like you,” you confessed, voice quiet and shy out of fear of rejection.
“yeah? you got a li’l crush on me?” his playful and teasing tone made you smile. dissipating any worries you had. this was the boy you were falling for. 
“just a little one. really, i’m just here for your truck.” the banter between the two of you was light and easy, something that you both always appreciated about each other. you clicked. 
“yeah, cowgirl, i know how you feel about my truck.”
you giggled at his response and kissed the bare, warm skin on his shoulder.
“you’re the most beautiful storm i’ve chased, y/n.” he looked into your eyes as he spoke, voice quiet as if speaking too loud would disrupt the moment.
“that’s funny. because you’re the sun coming up after the storm.”
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WHEW! first tyler fic done bbz<333 more to come, requests are open HERE! if you want to be tagged in future fics lmk, please tell me what you think, even if you think i should never write again ok thank u bye ily bye
taglist: @ronsbadidea
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noxtivagus · 2 years ago
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hdflkjasdklf i'm just thinking of certain characters n stories hehe
#🌙.rambles#no bcs why out of all gbf characters it is Belial that is on my mind lately.. 💀 he's so sus but there's smth sad abt him to me that i think#uh. makes me. feel drawn. SOMEHOW. charas in general that like i don't like them just bcs they're sad. i just Like them n later realize how#similar i am in a way n huh. maybe part of me. perhaps not really relate but i think i understand ^ him with lucilius. but. nyways#sometimes i find myself having ideas from time to time for. scenarios n stories n maybe not super concrete? even just the idea or the#emotion & sentiment of it. even if it's a mess bcs i just dump phrases n words from time to time.#i really like reading my own words. they remind me a lot of myself n resonate a lot with me.. i wrote them all after all before.#😭 ok i just got a notif bcs i have smth due in 24 hours from now.. (-> i ended up venting again but i have no more space to tag it)#there's a lot i'm stressed abt. anxious even. it's not rlly a big deal in the end n eventually the burden of my regrets will hurt less but#noooo i keep on rambling abt that i guess there's rlly just so much weighing me down in my mind But i will persevere!!!!#imagining stuff or wtvr n indulging in. idk any form of self-expression n being creative brings me so much comfort#when the break comes i'll read books i'll write stuff too i'll watch stuff i'll play video games i'll play/listen to music i'll. yeah. Live#like i want. but like success has always still meant a lot to me i'm too strict on myself w that so w school i constantly just feel trapped#even if assignments r easy n i understand all my lessons in general. i'll pass CETs certainly i'll succeed in the future i know that's who#i'll be but every single mistake just tears me apart and makes me forget who i am as a whole. i've always been 'better' in a way than your#average person i've always mostly generally done well & good but never ever quite the 'best'. so while i do love my intelligence n all as#a whole. ffs i know better but i end up being too harsh when it comes to my shortcomings. so. stuff like stories n games n yeah#those allow me to be free in a way. from my own restraints. from my own cage. so to not. be able to do that too rlly makes me forget myself#while w work n personal stuff like that i'm mostly sure of myself but when it comes to. me w ppl in this world. it's so. unpredictable?#that's just how ppl r. it's. intriguing to me definitely but. confusing. i long to belong but it's hard when most of my life i've felt..#i'm not rlly sure how to phrase it. it's in my head but yeah. so.. i'm rlly just a mess w that. i think i tend to isolate n distance myself#so easily bcs i fall far too much w the thought that. nothing much wld change? recently i'm so confused too bcs i'm aware of reality but#then i'm also just so confused n then a mess in general but i'm returning to like my old self when it comes to stories. embracing that agai#understanding myself a bit more while being distant w others but also lost for the very same reason. ITS SO CONFUSING n complex ofc.#which is. v human ig. but i'm not taking care of myself well so ffs it feels like i'm falling behind but i'm technically productive w work?#stuck between remembering. v well. i'm not too brain empty in the present too. n. i've been v keenly aware of the future#it's all going far too fast n i'm not keeping up Well Enough. the helplessness i think i wrote a while back#bcs i want to stop or i want to do smth or just change n get things done but it's not That easy. n it's been like this for so long now#i'll be fine my mind's just a mess rn n i'm just so frustrated w myself but i'm well enough. a bit empty but i'm fine.#there's a lot more to write n i could have done this in my notes but i'll stop anyways i'll work now. i'll try not to stay up Too late 🥹🫶🏼
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sanjisblackasswife · 10 months ago
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Can u pleaseeee do a part 2 to the nanami cam girl fanfiction 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Part 1 Of Nanami x Cam!Girl Reader Here
Blk!Fem Reader in Mind
CW: Pervert Nanami, Nanami with a voice kink, Idk. Smut fr w some plot.
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“Sssshit, yes baby….” Nanami’s voice growled from the back of his throat, his legs beginning to rise as his body tenses for a moment. His groans echoed through his empty apartment, only thing luminating his room was the lights of the city and his phone in his hand.
He threw his head back to land on the headboard, mind feeling a little fuzzy. This orgasm definitely drained him way more than any this week.
Maybe because this particular video he was using to get off was his and only for him.
“I um…i hope that was good for you Mr. Nanami.” She spoke breathlessly holding up the camera above her face as she laid on the fluffy pillows on her bed, eyes were dilated, cheeks flushed despite her skin tone, strands of hair on her forehead. She must have overworked herself this time. She did cum more than usual, as requested of him. “I never came that much, I almost feel embarrassed i couldn’t last as long as I should of.”
“You did amazing, sweetheart.” Nanami thought as she began to ramble a bit….per requested. Her voice was almost the equivalent to an angel through his ears. So soft, feminine and gentle.
Almost the polar opposite of her whiney, loud, slutty voice when she moans his name.
“I never gotten a um…private suggestion and you’ve been…so sweet with your donations I actually was able to get a new camera for it so of course I had to show you!”
“I noticed.” He thought, a faint smirk arising on his face.
“As promised though please do not share this video or post on any other platforms. Please.”
Nanami clicked off the video to give a long sign of relief. Her voice was too cute;
“Please.”
His thoughts still going a mile a minute, “Maybe next time she can beg to cum for me.”
Shaking his head to clear some of his perverted ideas he got up to take a quick shower and put on some new sheets. He actually tired himself out tonight, but he still couldn’t completely fall asleep.
He was tired yes, but everytime he shut his eyes they fluttered back up.
Tossing and turning on his bed he reached for his phone again, maybe another rewatch?
The shame nanami felt watching the streamer was now completely gone, he only watched her anyways and something about her voice always helped him not only get off, but fall asleep.
He remembers hearing a very….perverted conversation with Geto and Gojo about listening to sexual audios when they are too sleepy to watch a video, but too awake to fall asleep.
…It was 7am and honestly Nanami tried to ignore it, but Gojo was so damn loud.
With a moment before reconsidering he reached for his airpods and phone off the dresser again and scrolled through her videos.
This one. This video where she first moaned his first name was soothing
….to him.
Laying on his back, gently allowing the weight of his lids to fall shut he turned up the volume of his phone and just listened to her.
He replayed the video so much he almost can invision what she was doing in the exact moment she was speaking.
Nanami had no intention to touch himself again, just to simply hear her, but how naive of him to think he can listen to the wet sounds of her cunt and her soft moans and NOT have a body reaction.
He felt himself get hard, palming his shaft he rubbed it through his boxers, face getting red from the lewd thoughts he imagined from the video.
Nanami invisioned him on top of her, throwing her pretty thick leg on his shoulder, kissing her ankle to distract her from the full feeling of his tip and a few inches of shaft pushing its way inside her. When she moaned Nanami’s name he imagined that’s exactly how she’d sound the moment he bottomed out.
Without noticing his hand was down his boxers moving his fist at the same pace she was fingering herself.
Nanami wasn’t the type to make A LOT of noise when hes self pleasuring. He’s more vocal when with a woman, but his thoughts almost felt like reality he started to speak to himself as if she was there.
“Goooood good girl, sweetheart. Keep your eyes on me…yesss fuck—-so good taking me in like this….”
He never really got off to just audio before, but somehow with his eyes shut he felt more sensitive and it wasn’t long until he felt close again, but he tried to hold on until til she was as well.
“C’mon baby…just like that cum with me. Yes fuck—-“
It probably would seem embarrassing to see such a big strong man whimpering in his bed alone at the thought of fucking a girl he doesn’t even know, but fuck it he did not care. It felt too good to him
It wasn’t too long until he made another mess. Sucking his teeth he just grumbled to himself knowing he needs to grab a towel, but before he does that, he moves over the table in his phone and clicks “New Message”.
While still coming down from his high, Nanami sends another $200 donation and private message to the pretty streamer stating;
“How much would it be for a private phone call?”
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theemporium · 11 months ago
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technically the first proper introduction into the charles and blitz world despite how much we talk about them!!
series masterlist
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“If you die, can I get your Pista?”
Charles lifted his head, shooting you an unimpressed look. 
“What? I just thought we should cover all bases,” you defended, knocking your shoulder against his. 
You knew exactly what was going through his head. You knew he was overthinking the whole thing, making up the worst assumptions and how it could affect the time he would have to take off training. You knew he was working himself up like he tended to do, falling silent and allowing his only company to be himself.
It was the exact reason you insisted on coming with him.
“And out of everything I own, you want my car?” Charles questioned, his eyebrows raised. 
“Yeah well, you treat that thing like your baby—minus the parking skills,” you said with an innocent smile spread across your face. “Surely that makes me a step-mother or some sort of parental figure.”
“The way your brain works amazes me every day,” he murmured with a shake of his head.
“You love me,” you sang, nudging his shoulder once again and, this time, he lifted his arm to wrap it around your shoulder. 
“Unfortunately, I do. Even when you’ve started planning for my death before I go into surgery,” he mused, but you could hear the underlying hint of fear. The one he didn’t really want to admit, but the one that you saw as clear as day anyways.
“Everything is gonna be fine,” you reassured him and lightly squeezed his knee. “Who else am I gonna look down on the top step of the podium if not you?” 
He rolled his eyes. “It is truly a miracle I love you.”
“I’m the best thing in your life and you know it, Leclerc,” you countered, poking his side. 
Charles’ face softened. “Yeah, you are.” 
“Charles Leclerc!” 
He turned to look at the nurse who was waiting for him by the doors, a kind and welcoming smile on her face. You watched the way his face dropped a little, the way his body tensed against yours and you squeezed his knee again. 
“You’re coming back to me, Charlie. It’ll be fine.”
“Tu es si jolie, mon amour.”
*You are so pretty, my love.
“English, Charlie. My French is lacklustre at best.”
“Tu es l’amour de ma vie!” 
*You are the love of my life!
You sighed deeply, taking a glance at the boy in the passenger seat of the car. He had a lovesick smile on his face, his cheeks flushed pink and a little bit of drool on the edge of his mouth. He looked adorable—and fucking hilarious if the pictures you sent to his brothers were anything.
However, since the second he had woken up from the procedure, Charles seemed adamant on only rambling your ear off in French. No Italian or English to be heard. Just French. Just the one damn language that you were hopeless in, despite the many years you knew the Monegasque.
“J’ai hâte de t’épouser,” he sighed dreamily as he stared at you with an expression that made your chest tighten.
*I can’t wait to marry you
“I don’t know what you said but me too, buddy,” you said as you reached over to softly pat his thigh. 
However, the boy was one step ahead of you and quickly grabbed your hand to intertwine with his own.
“Regarder!” He giggled, holding your joined hands up proudly. “Nous sommes connectés pour toujours maintenant!” 
*Look! We are connected forever now!
“You’re so lucky you’re cute,” you commented, fighting the odd urge to bite back a smile even when you had no understanding of what he said. “I might need to call your mother if you keep up this whole French act.”
“Oui, appelle-la! C’est aussi ta famille, mon amour!” Charles nodded.
*Yes, call her! She is your family too, my love!
“You know, these embarrassing videos don’t work if even I don’t understand them,” you added, shooting him a look but he just smiled back at you, and you couldn’t really be mad at that.
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