#watch me romanticising life again; more and more

[m00ncrabcrap]

about yesterday

[cult-of-the-eye]

Why You Should Date Each of the Entities:

The Dark:

You can't see the things that are so plainly wrong in the dark, everything is softer, more blurred at the edges. your secrets will always be safe.

The Corruption:

You will never be alone again, loved unconditionally, blindly, wildly by something that lives within you. Something that has marked you. Something that will never leave.

The Lonely:

Isn't it so peaceful? So calm? Being given your own space, living, loving in silence together. How can you be hurt if there's no one to hurt you?

The Eye:

What would you give to fully be Seen? To be understood? In your deliriously human entirety. A complex puzzle of experience and nature, dissected and pieced back together.

The Vast:

You want to be drawn in, magnetised by something larger than life, bigger than you could ever imagine. You want it to overwhelm you, the indifference in which it reacts to your all-encompassing desire. The best part of love is the falling.

The Flesh:

Meat is meat is meat. Why romanticise what is so plainly human? You are a person, made of flesh and bones, you would like to be with another person, made of flesh and bones. Simple as.

The Web:

Love me, love me not. You pull off each of the spider's legs to understand your romantic fate. It's infinitely complex, ineffable to you and your human machinations. You just want to follow the red string, hopefully finding someone on the other end.

The Slaughter:

It's me and you. You and me. Why should anyone else get in the way? I'll dig through your ribcage and curl up aside your beating heart, holding it as it ceases to beat.

The Spiral:

You don't want to understand. You just want to your hand to be taken, pulled along to dizzying adventures. Chug the slushee and relish the feeling of the brain freeze.

The End:

Everything ends. At least this way, you have more control. The relief that washes over you is no longer tinged with guilt.

The Buried:

You're surrounded on all sides by your lover, encompassed and safe. The pressure condenses your fizzing veins into hard candy and for the first time, you feel solid.

The Desolation:

Burn it down and only we are left. We are the most important people to each other and it shall stay that way, until the both of us perish. It will end as it started, with a rush of flame.

The Hunt:

You're constantly chasing the pounding, breathless feeling in your chest, craving the twist of the neck to check if I'm still watching, still five paces behind. It's presence is comforting, mingled with torturous.

The Stranger:

Fuck man I don't know how to make this one sound romantic.

[enemywasp]

Alright so someone on tiktok sent me a link to a compiled list of arguments against proshippers and so I wanted to put a sort of brief response of my own thoughts of each point.

Long post warning!

"Proshippers are non-offending minor attracted people in a fresh paint of coat"

What a start, am I right? Okay so first off this is a huge generalisation, not every proshipper engages with or is even comfortable with anything that sexualises fictional children, or ships them with adults. And of those that do ship adult/minor ships, it doesn't always mean they're attracted to the character themselves or gains any sexual pleasure from that.

They then went on to say that although they might be non-offending, they still fantasise about and romanticise children- in the case of proshippers by creating art and stories. And I am not personally educated enough on how people's minds works to go in depth here, but I do know a lot of pedophilic thoughts can be intrusive and unwanted. And I would much rather people engage in this and deal with their thoughts through fiction where no actual children are harmed, than actually go touch a real child or engage is any form of CSEM.

“People can draw and ship whatever they want!”

Here they went on to say that surely to ship and create content you must justify these things in some capacity regardless of them being fictional. And immediately I'd argue, the justification it that they're fictional. And that sometimes you want to read about things you'd never approve of in real life, it's a natural curiosity. And again, regardless of what the dark content is I would take someone engaging in fiction over harming a real person any day.

They compared this to alt-right groups and dark humour justifying racism and transphobia, etc. And whilst I think something we should always be aware of in fiction is stereotypes and how we may be representing people. Youtube videos like this are usually a type of propaganda that AIM to change people's mindsets and turn them against groups. Whereas fiction tells a story, some may have meanings and connections to real life, be a political piece, etc. Not everything is that serious and has a clear distinction from reality.

Think for example, reading/watching about murder and gore. More on that in a second.

"Fiction doesn't affect reality!"

I'm going to be honest I rolled my eyes at this as their main example was slenderman. If you don't know about that, those girls were schizophrenic. Anything could of set off and caused delusions, it just so happened to be fiction. Those girls needed help- not to just read purer content. They also basically brought up propaganda again, which is again deliberate and designed to warp peoples perceptions. Its based of lying and spreading misinformation and passing it as facts. The only thing I strongly believe can be directly harmful is stereotypes if not handled with care. But I think that's something for anyone who writes and consumes content should be aware of regardless of their stances.

Again here they implied that all proshippers are peodophiles. And that they normalise abuse of children. I'd also like to point out that most proshippers I've interacted with online have age boundaries to avoid interacting with minors depending on how graphic or sexual their content is.

"What do you think all stories about murder should stop existing?"

Here they basically argued that killing in media isn't the same as its not romanticised or condoned. YA Novels disagree- mafia stories being the most immediate example to spring to mind. Furthermore, morally grey villains. One of my favourite films is Mr Right. It's about a hitman killing people. Anna kendrick falls in love with him and its framed as a romantic comedy. Funny how its only fanfiction that's criticised like this? I actually have more thoughts on this if anyones interested.

Again they bring up kids not knowing adults pursuing children is wrong, and I'm questioning why children this young are unsupervised on the Internet. How young were you when you were allowed to watch anything with graphic blood or violence? This content isn't made for kids! Especially not anyone so young they can't seperate fiction from reality as most sites have a specific age you have to be to join. And I'm sorry to say it, but on websites and social media where adults can interact with kids, anything can be used to groom kids. (The real thing you should be mad about here is how there's no websites aimed just for children and safe spaces on the Internet anymore cause it can't be monetised as easily)

"Artists are allowed to draw and write about dark people"

They basically said, yes but it's not the same as promoting. Writing something under a romantic light and not saying "Don't do at home!" Isn't promoting. No ones encouraging these things in real life. Or rather, if they are its not because they're a proshipper but rather who they are as a person and their intentions.

The trans example they used is very extreme and honestly something I agree with a little more, fiction can definitely be used as an excuse to say and act out hateful and discriminatory things. Whilst I do think it's something we should discuss and unpack more, I'm not certain of my view on how I would fix this without risking silencing people talking about their experiences.

"Its not my responsibility to look after other people, just block me and the tags"

Here they threw all kinds of accusations. And says that we're making traumatised people jump through hoops to avoid getting retraumatised. I hate this argument, you know people have actual triggers they may not be able to avoid in real life? The world can't bend around you. And I am very sorry if any content online is traumatising to you, but someone could also be traumatised by a certain breed of dog and not want to see it. Should no one post dogs online ever again? A bald man reminds you of an abusive ex? Bald men get off the Internet! You see how this thing can just keep escalating? The tags and warnings are important because they're the best you can get. You can't control the world to protect everyone from everything ever. No ones forcing you to interact, and if you're on any algorithm based content that will encourage that content on your for your page more.

The only thing I think we should take from this is the reminder that warnings and tags are always important.

"You only care about censoring creativity"

Here they defend themselves that oh wouldn't you want freaks out the community! Which again immediately makes me lose respect for you, if you're just going to brand us all as freaks as an argument and generalize us.

No comment on that first line when you can easily argue antishipper do the same.

"Proshippers are not remotely innocent of targeted harrasement" Neither are antis. There's people who take things too far both sides and I'm not going to defend either for that.

"Real kids get assaulted and all you care about is censoring people online!"

Here they shout "oh I can care about both!" But what I don't think they realise is censorship can make it difficult for kids and to learn about how to speak up and to look for signs, or to speak up about their experiences. How do you plan on removing the topic from the Internet whilst also letting victims speak up? And people may want to write fiction based off their experiences. Who are you to go through it and proclaim what is too far, what romanticises it too much? More on this later.

"Antis are reducing my trauma"

They compared this to saying "date rape victims are reducing my trauma because they weren't taken advantage of in the same way as me" which is a disgusting parallel?? Date rape is still rape. Someone writing about something isn't the same as it happening. Although it can be used as harrasment, grooming, etc if directly addressed to you or being constantly sent to you, written about you. But the content existing in general? No.

"I'm coping"

Compared it to self harm, and such. Poetry and diaries are also used to write about your experiences and unpack trauma. Some of which may write it in an unrealistically positive light cause that's how they want to unpack it or explain those thoughts. And yes these things get posted online.

I can't imagine a single therapist or professional psychiatrist of any kind disapproving of creative writing because, again, it's much better than any alternatives of doing real harm to yourself or people around you. Although I do agree that if something is traumatising for you to read about and just upsets you further, be aware of your own boundaries but not everyone is the same so how are you going to police people's own thoughts and emotions.

Also I can't remember who or where as it was years ago now, but I have heard of people who actually realised they were being groomed or abused and just how bad it was through reading about it in a fanfic and seeing it in an outside perspective.

They also say to do it in private, but doesn't everyone on the Internet now have an understanding of finding a community and looking out for eachother and sharing experiences?

"There's more nuance here than just calling proshippers peodophiles"

Here they say no matter what it still comes down to whether it's ever okay to sexualise minors in certain contexts. And again, not every proshipper does this or is even comfortable with engaging in this kind of content. And further, no one is sexualising real minors in this context.

"I'm a proshipper and a minor tho!"

I'd agree minors should be wary of the spaces they're in but proship spaces aren't always necessarily sexual, graphic or 18+. Saying they're being groomed feels like you're watering down that term. I was a proshipper at age 13, I didn't interact with anyone online about it though, I didn't even know that was the term. I just came to the conclusion that it's just fiction all on my own. Minors aren't idiots.

At then end they talk about their own experience being groomed and I'm obviously not going to nitpick or criticise their experiences. I will point out that one person being bad and taking advantage of you and using content to do so doesn't mean everyone is like that. I am sorry to anyone who has been taken advantage of by someone who claims they're a proshipper though. There are people who have turned out to be horrible on both sides.

I am ill and it's late but I want to get this up sooner rather than later so please ask for clarification on anything. I'm always up for a discussion on this topic as I do believe some of these points do have merits at times and that this whole topic is not black and white

[ndostairlyrium]

Blabbering ahead about the game in my usual broken English lol

Warning: General, mildly spoiler-y stuff. But still spoilery. Dead dove, yada yada

I tried to avoid reading opinions as much as possible, so I could share my own without filters <<

...this will be a looooong post so I'm putting everything under the cut :'

I've enjoyed this game greatly.

I loved Rook, each companion, the more synthesized visual style, and the majority of the changes they did to make this game stand out among the others. In some parts, it really reminded me of Mass Effect, and those parts I truly adored in a visceral way.

I get the criticism about Rook's tone, but I didn't mind that they had a specific personality and you could work around it. They're a mess of a person, showing a great deal of immaturity in some parts, forced to call the shots, and to be a compass for others while trying to keep everything from falling from their hands. They're just not as player-nuanced (like, it's not on us?) personality-wise as Hawke, I think? Which is a bummer for some, and I get it, but I didn't mind :'D I'm one that deflects a lot with humor, that's my jam

I think I did good approaching this game blindly, and to keep going despite encountering some major disappointments along the way (y'all saw me complaining, I'm a "yes, but" hoe). In the end, I was enthusiast about playing it, I've been enthusiast while playing it, and I'm enthusiast now that it's over (in a very positive way).

Also, to me the combat system was super fun (I had a blast playing orb+dagger mage with the necromancer spec). I liked that it was more dynamic, that you were in control of your character only, and I adored the cheerleading going on within the team during the fights, also the action scenes were SO EPIC. There are a couple of cutscenes in particular that I watch on a daily and feel the tension on my shoulders as if I didn't know the results already :'D

Hate to bring out Mass Effect again, but... I felt that same kind of powerless urgency throughout Veilguard. Except that you're not Shepard, already a hero, you're a nobody in disgrace, somebody looking for a purpose, for then being hired by someone who has a history of dooming whoever he works with :'D in my head, my Rook has accepted because he needed something to go right. Very lol. Much lmao.

Again, bringing out Mass Effect. I always adored Mass Effect important NPCs outside the party, like Bakara for example. I experienced the same kind of attachment to those here, and I was truly frightened for some of them throughout the game, especially the ones I've known from Tevinter Nights.

...now, to the "Yes, but" that had me so frustrated to the point of wanting to stop playing:

I just wish a little bit more sensitivity by the team when approaching specific cultural references. These, along with stereotypes, have always been blatant throughout the games, and I was hoping that in this one we would move past them rather than the doubling down I saw. I can't talk on others behalf, but I could elaborate for hours on why the whole deal of Treviso and the romanticising of Crows (to the point of painting them as the good guys) are such a point of offense for me, even if I'm tired to explain that there's nothing romantic when organized crime takes control over an entire country and call it "patriotism". Moral code my ass. Glorification of mafia is never okay.

Don't pillage take stuff from real life if you're gonna turn them like living stereotypes and excuse that behavior by calling it "inspiration". It's cheap and disrespectful. Fandom has been repeating this for more than 10 years and nobody corrected this trajectory. That's sad, to say the least.

[girllblogging777]

Sorry if someone's already asked this, I'm fairly new to your page but what are some of your favorite Taylor Swift songs or albums or your thoughts in general about each one?

𝑠𝑤𝑖𝑓𝑡𝑖𝑒 𝑡𝑎𝑙𝑘 !

↳ honestly i’m so so happy you asked because it gives me an opportunity to talk about taylor’s music so i’m just gonna rant a little bit

my experience as a swiftie :

✩ my first memory of listening to taylor was when i’d watch the shake it off clip with my sister RELIGIOUSLY, even though we were really young at the time

✩ i started listening to her music a little after fearless tv released and became a swiftie during red tv (best era ever imo, i miss streaming atwtmv all day long and romanticising fall)

✩ i had the chance to go to the eras tour back in june, which was the BEST experience of my life. i traveled to london just for the concert and it was so great !

✩ london n2 btw, i feel like we had the worst show of all wembleys and i can’t believe i missed gracie abrams by a day, but i’m still super grateful (i got thank you aimee x mean and castles crumbling)

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

my opinions on her music :

✩ i’m personally more of a fountain pen songs swiftie than a glitter gel pen one, although i love all of her albums and songs (all bops idc)

✩ i have absolutely NO idea how to rank her albums because it changes everyday and based on my mood

✩ in my opinion, taylor’s most “taylor” album is red, which is why i have a particular attachment to it

✩ folklore and evermore are BOTH masterpieces and evermore deserves to get the folklore treatment (dare i say it’s better than folklore ?)

✩ debut is criminally underrated and i can’t wait for people to realise that when taylor’s version is released

✩ ttpd is a perfect album, and probably in my top three of hers (i do like the anthology better than the album in itself)

✩ her only album with NO skips (again that’s my opinion) is reputation….

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

about ME! :

✩ she truly does have a song for every situation, it’s insane

✩ i’m a this is me trying/the archer girl through and through, that’s for sure

✩ as for my favourite songs, i do have a particular attachment to cowboy like me and you are in love (yes i cried when she did a mashup) and my most streamed song of hers is haunted

✩ OKAY WAIT i’m gonna do a little playlist with taylor songs that describe my “romantic life” (you’ll get the lore pretty easily, try to guess what happened)

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

♪ the playlist ♪

“babe”

“my boy only breaks his favorite toys”

“now that we don’t talk”

“betty”

“gold rush”

“better man”

“the 1”

“the smallest man who ever lived”

“peter”

“girl at home”

“down bad”

“right where you left me”

“foolish one”

pretty sure no one is gonna read all that but i had so much fun ! thank you for your question <3

[htchnr]

♰ romanticised life ༻ ASH WILLIAMS.*ೃ˚

➻ masterlist. ➻ buy me a coffee!

cw smoking ⋆ you and Ash are both high AF ⋆ innuendos ⋆ it's Ash, come on ⋆ making out ⋆ age gap ⋆ Ash is in his 40s reader in her late 20s/early 30s ⋆ not beta'd we die like season 4 ⋆ i may or may not have been drunk while writing this ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!

pairing f!reader x older!Ash. (Ash vs Evil Dead)

summary Ash has always been enamoured by your painted nails, it's not a secret to anyone. during a late night smoke you reveal why you often paint your nails a specific color. wc 1,3k.

authors note i like goofy Ash as much as the next person, but i wanted a relatively tame/normal fic for once (and there are so, so painfully few out there) so i wrote one myself 😁 (also, requests are open for Ash 😊)

© 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐇𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐍𝐑. 𝐝𝐨 ����𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫!

you lay there, head lolling against his shoulder. yours legs are draped across his lap, his large warm hand firmly holding onto your thigh to keep you in place — pff, as if you'd ever want to move from this position.

your eyes droop from moment to moment as you paint your nails, contact high from Ash's third joint, the smoke swirling thick throughout the trailer. you never minded though, happy to just lay there against him.

Ash is enamoured with the sight, how precisely you start off, then the strokes slowly get sloppier the higher you get. he'd start to say something about it, but you'd say something along the lines of 'when it's dry you can just wash the excess off with warm water' and he'd keep quiet.

he doesn't comment on it to make fun of you, hell no. he's curious, always used to your nails perfectly done — always with a nice color and occasionally with a cute pattern. he loved anything you put on your nails.

right now, you were to high to bother with a pattern or little embellishments, just sticking to the nice burgundy polish you loved so much. it looked good against Ash's blue shirt.

his fingers would periodically grip and ungrip against the plush skin of your bare thigh, kneading the hot skin as he watched you.

he exhaled deeply, smoke bellowing from between his thin lips. " 's that y'er favorite color? " he nods to the burgundy polish bottle that's squished between your knees as to hold it without occupying your hands.

your eyes slowly blink, finishing up the last stroke on your thumb nail. you hum, sticking the brush back in the bottle and twisting it shut. you lean back, your back pressed against the couch as you stretch to put the bottle on the side table.

you huff as you move back to your previous position, tucked into his side with your head lolling against his shoulder as your polish dries. you're especially glad you always go with quick drying polish, as you just want it to dry and not worry about it smudging as you settle against Ash.

" y'know why i like it so much? " your words dragged out. you look up at him through your lashes.

he doesn't think you've ever looked more beautiful, messy hair, wearing just a loose shirt and your underwear, looking up at him with those glazey eyes. he thinks he might just fall in love all over again if you don't stop looking at him like he hung the stars for you.

" Ash? " your voice snaps him out of his thoughts, blinking as his eyes meet yours. you give him a dopey smile as you chuckle. " i think we should put a pause to this, " you smile, and before he knows it his joint is between your fingers instead of his.

" hey! " he laughs, leaning to take it from you. you beat him by placing the filter between your lips, taking a long drag from it, before laying down as you exhale in a long sigh. the joint now farther away from him.

he leans with you, adjusting as he hovers above you. your legs trapped between his knees as he looks down at you with those lovesick brown eyes. " if you think i should pause, no way-hosé do you get to pick it up dollface, "

his hand coming up to hold your face. your eyes are slow, your whole face moving in slow motion as you laugh. " don't you want an answer to your question, loverboy? "

he grins, " 'course i do, " his hand trailing down your face and past your shoulders, slowly sliding down your waist as his eyes follow his hand.

his eyes return to your hand with his joint when you move to take another drag, throwing your free arm around his neck to bring him in closer as you inhale the smoke. his eyes are focused on your lips as you lean in, pressing them against his as you let the smoke flow between his lips.

he eagerly inhales, exhaling the smoke before hungrily pressing his lips against yours. he reluctantly pulls away after a few seconds, eyes meeting yours once more. " so sugar lips, why is it your favorite color? " he presses a few stray kisses to your cheeks and jaw.

you breathe against him, your inebriated body moving in sync with his underneath him. he pulls away, those sweet brown eyes searching your face.

you press a hand against his blue shirt, glancing at your nails. " 'cause this color looks so nice against your shirt. " you whisper, taking one last hit from the joint before twisting and leaning back to smother the butt of it in the ashtray.

Ash blinks, eyes trailing down to your hand on his shirt. huh, they did look really good together. he leans down, pressing hungry kisses against the exposed skin of your throat.

" i can think of a few other places they'd look very, very pretty, " he mumbles against your skin, revelling in the sensation of your nails scratching at his scalp as his lips continue his assault on your skin.

[mazzystar24]

Let’s discuss how much Bobby said to Eddie when talking about Shannon “how did you make that happen?” And eddie responds “i didn’t”. Are we to believe Eddie, didn’t make the first move? Just like Ana and Marisol; he HAD to be forced/told into it? We know that got together at 14 and pregnant at 18. Were they together the whole time? How stable was their relationship before finding out she was pregnant?

See this is why an Eddie begins again episode is a psychological need as part of his queer arc

Like there is such an interesting thing abt the Shannon and Eddie dynamic where you have to distinct what parts are the truth of it and what parts are the glossed over romanticised in her death version

Also the comp het element of Eddie is just sooooo blatant and like interesting because it’s one of those where it’s not a leap or even a really buried and hard to dissect thing that’s like sprinkled every now and then, instead it’s like a consistent “hidden” piece woven into all of Eddie’s narratives, you know what I mean?

But back to Shannon and Eddie as you said like we know the whole getting together young and the pregnant young pieces and we also know that at some point they RECONNNECTED so there was a period where they were friends or knew eachother then not then reconnected and then got together then got pregnant

See but then it gets more complex because we have Eddie saying things about how they were magic together when we saw a really different marriage dynamic and then you have him say that the church is the biggest reason they got married in a convo about his catholic guilt, you have him say he positive things about being married to her but you know as the audience that he spent most that time separated or fighting, and even when he says that he liked being married to her it comes off more as a liking to be married rather than liking the marriage or the person you’re with

And even when he was daydreaming that post sex scene nothing about it is inherently sexual or about them in fact the whole conversation is about how he is choosing to let her back into Christopher’s life and “giving him his mom back for Christmas” like people use that scene as a “straight Eddie defence” saying it’s him fantasising about sex with his ex but I’m sat there like brother in Christ watch the actual scene how is this sexy talk or anything other than proof that in Eddie’s sick little brain (affectionate) Shannon and therefore Kim can complete this idea of what he needs for his son

Also controversial opinion that I THINK I mentioned before but I’m really not a fan of Shannon, like the way she spoke about Chris and his CP will never not rub me the wrong way (to put it lightly) and her leaving with zero contact imo makes me low-key hate her and I hate the comparison ppl try to make for when Eddie “left” and this kinda links in with the next part

I think that the show keeps doing too much retcon/romanticisation of Shannon’s character in relation to not only Eddie but Chris too, but they can sorta mend that in a really perfect way by having some sort of onscreen perhaps in therapy acknowledgement from Eddie that he does in fact romanticise her and their relationship since her death while diving into why he does that and what their relationship ACTUALLY was like

Like what’s really interesting to me also connecting to the comp het element is that Eddie as a character is not passive, but when you get into his LI relationships there is this like compliance and like conformity to them

Like by his own words he didn’t pursue Shannon, he also married her largely cos of the church and despite having really ott romantic ideas for chimney’s proposal suggesting that he does have a side of that, he actually admits his proposal was pretty much well guess we have to get married now, when talking about Ana he canonically was following Chris’ heart not his, said something about “gonna have to stick it out” when talking abt her, then we have marisol and that mess and have lines like the catholic guilt, him not being that sad about potentially breaking up with her, him not having said anything to indicate to bobby he wanted to move in with her, etc, etc and we have Kim and that mess which honestly is its own category outside of the LI list

But yeah like totally agree with you like the shannon/eddie thing is in desperate need of a real unraveling in the show out loud preferably in therapy with Frank because that man needs to pull his weight fr 🤩

I have a degree in yappology fr

[finchesslingshott]

HI THERE I JUST FINISHED LISTENING TO THE OUTSIDERS MUSICAL CAST ALBUM HOO BOY WHAT A WILD RIDE HERE ARE MY UNEDITED NOTES BUCKLE IN ITS A LOTTA WORDS

Tulsa ‘67 - 9/10

OK PONY??? HIS VOICE????

Instrumental i love you

“I know there’s so much more to life than what’s in front of me” UGHHH MY HEART

THIS IS ACTUALLY A BANGER WHAT THE HECK??

THE RUNS??? PONY???

I love tenors

The lyrics are just so simple and plain and straight-forward it really like emphazises the fact that pony’s only supposed to be 14-15 in this

“Building up the west side while the east side falls apart” WOAH

THE CHORDDDDD OH MY GOSH

“WE ARE GREASERS!” UGH IM SOBBING

PONYYYYYYY HIS VOICE I’M DYING HE’S PHENOMENAL

Grease Got a Hold - 10/10

Soda your voice- UGH IT’S PHENOMENAL (or maybe it’s dally? I’m not sure I’m bad at distinguishing voices)(pretty sure it's soda tho)

THE. FREAKING. SAXAPHONE.

WOAHHH OH MY GOSH OK RAPPER ERA I LOVE YOU SODA AND TWO-BIT

The harmonies have me ascending

“I LOVE YOU SUPERMAN” I’M SOBBING

THE HARMONIES. OH MY GOODNESS.

THE RUN????? YES?????

Runs in the Family - 8/10

DARRY I LOVE YOU.

“Now i’m stuck between the role of a brother and a father” 

The instrumental is so Hamilton-coded (specifically the smooth cello) and I love it

That was too short but oh my GOSH.

Great Expectations - 10/10

“Lately I’ve been thinking ‘bout that little orphan boy / whose parents died and left him all alone” MY HEART THE ABANDONMENT TRAUMA MY POOR BABY

“And I wonder / Is that orphan story mine?”

This is gonna be the one I’m gonna kin most you watch and wait

The EMOTIONS.

“I look around at all of my friends / but still I feel alone” OH MY GOSH

“I would follow them into battle but / this story isn’t mine”

THE HARMONIES. I’M IN TEARS.

PONYBOY CURTIS. YOU HAD NO RIGHT HITTING ME WITH A HIGH B RIGHT NOW

“It’s hard to write the story / when the story’s writing me”

Friday at the Drive-in - 8.5/10

THE INSTRUMENTAL? I LOVE YOU ORCHESTRA

CHERRY’S VOICE??? YES MA’AM ATE IT UP

THE HARMONIES. THE HARMONIES.

This sounds like the most fun number in the show like just from the sounds i’m hearing i need to see this show like right now

THAT WAS TOO SHORT BUT OH MY LORD

I Could Talk to You All Night - 9.5/10

Cherry your voice is so beautiful I love you

Just kiss Pony already hurry up /j

PONYBOY CURTIS. YOUR VOICE. MARRY ME.

I never shipped Cherry and Pony in the book or the movie but like- half of me is kinda-

THE HARMONIESSSSS I LOVE THEM.

“It was the first time in my life someone actually listened to me like that.”

UGH I LOVE YOU BOTH

Runs in the Family (Reprise) - 8.5/10

Soda’s dialogue in between Darry’s singing has me sobbing i love them

“I’ll fold the laundry… I’LL FOLD ALL OF IT!” i love you soda

Darry’s voice urgh I love tenors

“I try to keep you from the fire / but I’m the one that’s getting burned”

Darry mental breakdown song I’m living for it

THE RUN??? DARREL CURTIS???

“What’s the use of dreaming of a life I’ll never know?”

THE SHOUTING MATCH?? 

CALLING SODA “YOUR KNUCKLEHEAD BROTHER” IS COMPLETELY UNCALLED FOR HE’S LITERALLY RIGHT THERE DARRY

The drama the emotion I’m here for it

Far Away from Tulsa - 9.5/10

Ponyboy singing his rear off in this musical and I’m so grateful for it KEEP MY BOY SINGING

Yes romanticise your dreams king I love you

“Santa Fe” from Newsies’ depressed younger cousin fr

This song is for the kids dreaming of running away with their best friend and leaving their entire life behind

Oops another song to kin

AWWWWWH JOHNNY YOUR VOICE I LOVE YOU

“And every night we’d stare up at the stars”

THE HARMONIES I LOVE THEM

I never shipped these guys either but like I can see it tbh

THE CALLBACK TO “GREAT EXPECTATIONS”

ONCE AGAIN PONYBOY YOU AND YOUR HIGH NOTES ARE BREAKING ME APART I LOVE YOU

I needed more Johnny but it’s okay

Run Run Brother - 9.5/10

The opening dialogue already breaking my heart Pony sounds so panicked

Johnny your little voice i love you

Once again these lyrics are so straightforward

THE HARMONIES

Dally I love you

THIS IS ACTUALLY SUCH A BOP WHAT

DALLY YOUR VOICE UGH ITS SO GOOD

It’s so cohesive to the book’s story I love it thank you S.E. Hinton for not completely changing the entire plot I wouldve lost my mind

“Even though it kills me to say / run run brother / run take cover” MY HEART IS DEAD

The ensemble/chorus vocals in the background are making it almost like eerie I love this

“You can run (?) from the fire / but you’re bound to get burned” FORESHADOWING

Johnny I love your speaking voice I need more of it

USING THE TRAIN SOUNDS I LOVE IT

Justice for Tulsa - 9/10

The beat is so Hamilton-coded /pos

Dallas hecking Winston I love you

Once again the chorus vocals adds a layer of like tension I never could’ve imagined

CHERRY!!!! HEY POOKIE!!!!

“When it was only you and me alone / I saw a side of you I wished you’d known”

HEY RANDY OMG IT’S MY FAVORITE SIDE CHARACTER

“We were only having fun” urgh my heart this poor boy

Cherry standing up for Pony and Johnny go girl go

Is this the closer of act one? Cuz HOLY HECK

SOCS VOCALS I LOVE YOU GUYS

RANDY LET’S HECKING GO

THE HARMONIES OH MY GOSH

Death’s at My Door - 8.7/10

Once again freaking PONYBOY CURTIS I LOVE YOUR VOICE WITH MY ENTIRE SOUL

This feels like a Phoebe Bridgers song and honestly I am so freaking here for it

“Johnny can’t you see / I’ve brought this on / you should move on / you’d be better off without me” oh so he’s HURT okay

UGH JOHNNY YOUR SWEET LITTLE VOICE MY ANGEL

“The reason I’m living is you” THE HARMONIES, THE STATEMENT, MY BOYS

I LOVE THEM

Once again WAY TOO SHORT but URGH SO GOOD

I need a Phoebe Bridgers cover asap

Throwing in the Towel - 9/10

OK STRING INSTRUMENTAL?? I LOVE YOU ORCHESTRA

Darry’s voice urhghahaddskflgfhlksfdlhdgls

YIPPEE ANOTHER DARRY BREAKDOWN SONG I’M LOVING THE VULNERABILITY THAT WE NEVER SAW IN THE BOOK

Soda I love you

URGH SODA’S VOICE IT’S JUST SO ALGSJDFDHSKDLASDFKLS MY BEAUTIFUL BOY

Lil brother therapy session

“We gotta get our brother HOOOOOMEEEE” Soda your voice is just so phenomenal I love you

THE HARMONIESSSSSSS 

“We need you more than ever now / don’t go throwing in the towel” you go Soda encourage your brother therapy friend king 

Someone give these boys a hug for me I love them

THE HARMONIES MY HEART

Soda’s Letter - 9.5/10

THE INSTRUMENTAL ALONE MADE ME SAID “OH NOOOO D’:”

“Ponyboy this house ain’t a home without you” OH YOU’RE JUST GONNA BREAK MY HEART JUST LIKE THAT

“Your brother needs you just as much as you need him / and brother we ain’t doing so good alone” MY HEART

The vulnerability in this moment I can picture soda just in tears I’m sure that’s not how it’s set but let me have this okay

THE HARMONIES

“P.S. Say hey to Johnny for us :D”

URGH TOO SHORT AGAIN

Hoods Turned Heroes - 10/10

THE INSTRUMENTAL IS ALR FIRE WOAH

WAIT IS THIS CURLY WHAT’S-HIS-NAME???? OR HIS BROTHER?? WTV HIS NAME IS???

HIS VOICE IS FIRE NO MATTER WHO HE IS

This is actually such a banger no fair

“SOMEONE GOT ROBBED / SOMEONE GOT MUGGED / SOMEONE HAD A RUN IN WITH THE GREASER HOOD”

Gosh I love tenors literally so much 😭

WAYYYY TO SHORT OH MY GOOSH

Hopeless War / Trouble - 10/10

THIS SOUNDS LIKE ANOTHER BOYGENIUS SONG JUST FROM THE FIRST LIKE 2 SECONDS

PREPPING FOR EMOTIONAL DESTRUCTION

Uh-oh another song to kin

I love them

“Now that Johnny’s hurt and Bob has died / when will we be satisfied?” MY HEART

THIS CHORUS CHERRY YOU’RE KILLING ME

THE MOOD CHANGE????

OH MY GOSH THE INSTRUMENTAL

THE STRINGGGSSSSS (as a cello player i’m deceasing)

“DO IT FOR JOHNNY”

Little Brother - 9.7/10

ONCE AGAIN the bass + drum combo killing me 

OOO THE EMOTION DALLY

“Who would they beat on / if we weren’t around?”

THE FALSETTO????

“Little brother / sorry I failed you / i could not save you / no i can’t even save myself” DALLY???? ARE YOU OKAY BABE???

I can just picture him absolutely UNRAVELING at the point, javert-style

“They can’t take nothin’ more from me / If I ain’t got you / then I ain’t got nothin’ else” EXCUSE ME?????

“If anything was fair / you would still be here” DYING

DALLY YOUR VOICE I LOVE YOU

THE EERIE STRINGS USFJDLKFJGKFSDJ THE ORCHESTRA KID IN ME IS DECEASING

THE TENSION IN THE MUSIC??? THE BUILD UP

OH MY GOSH??

“JOHNNY CAN YOU SEE ME NOWWWWWW”

WAS THAT A TRAIN??? THAT’S NOT HOW IT WAS IN THE BOOK????

I’M SO CONFUSED AND SAD ALL AT THE SAME TIME?????

MY BOY????? COME BACKKK?????

Stay Gold - 10/10

JOHNNY???? BABE?????

“Swore I wasn’t ready to die / turns out I was wrong” LITERALLY STOP I’M SOBBING

Once again all I can think about is Phoebe Bridgers

“When you’re young / and the world is new / it’s easy to forget when all you’re tryna do is make it through”

Wuh-oh kinning a song again

“I’ll hold on to the good / cause I’ve made peace with all the bad”

THE HARMONIES I’M IN TEARS

“There’s still a whole lotta good in the world. Tell Dally. I don’ think he knows”

The harmonies and you can hear like the strain and emotion in Pony’s voice

YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DO THAT TO ME

Finale (Tulsa ‘67) - 9.7/10

YES FULL-CIRCLE MOMENT I LOVE YOU

“I use to idolize the actors on the screen / I looked like Newman like a king / and now I look at what my brothers did for me / they’re the reason I’m standing right now”

“Darrel you’re the toughest guy I know / it just took me too long to see / Soda you’re this family’s heart and soul / can you imagine how proud Mom and Dad must be?”

THE MONOLOGUE???? BABE???? SOMEONE HOLD ME I’M FALLING APART

“This is TUL-SA NINTEEN SIXTY SEVEN” will never cease to get me

DYING LITERALLY SHUT UP PONYBOY I LOVE YOU

“STAYYY GOOOOOLLLLDDDDDD”

Orchestra i love you never change

IN CONCLUSION: 

DARRY AND SODA I LITERALLY LOVE YOU SO MUCH

JOHNNY COME BACK BABY I MISS YOU

I didn’t get enough Randy but maybe that’s just me

ORCHESTRA FREAKING PHENOMENAL

[box-dwelling]

I'm gonna be completely honest when I say that the thing that really really rubbed me the wrong way about the toshiro situation is the way he treats fallin in comparison to Laios. I'm not saying that Laios wasn't doing a considerable number of microagressions against him, he absolutely was. And Toshiro is right to be exhausted and furious about that. But the thing that gets me is how fucking similar the toudens are.

I do not care about him "getting in the way of farcille" I ship it but honestly when he was first introduced I really liked him and was out here shipping him too. I don't have any issue with the proposal, which is a clearly stated cultural difference. The fight scene is heartrenching for any autistic person to watch but also, he isn't exactly doing ok right there. He's in a very rough traumatised place, I get why he would lash out.

The thing that gets me is how so many of the characteristics he demonises in Laios he romanticises in Fallin and as an autistic person that feels really gross? Given these are mostly autisitic traits. It's an interesting complexity to him in a vacuum but outside of it, where autistic women are so often erased and the quirky manic pixie dream girl concept is so fetishised while having overlap with neurodivergent people it feels very uncomfortable.

Truthfully we never see Fallin do the same microagressions which may be a reason Toshiro didn't lash out at her and could see them in a more postive light. But she still seems to call him Shuro which isn't his name and her and laios are so similar that I feel like she likely had a similar reaction just, because he had feelings for her, it didn't seem as unwanted. Again that's an interesting and sympathetic thing within a vacuum but outside of it it makes me uncomfortable for the same reason I think it would be completely reasonable for someone who has had to deal with racial microagressions all their life to dislike Laios because of it

I'm not saying there is not racism isn't a part of the backlash, but I really did want to clarify exactly what made me start to dislike him. There is very good reasons for a lot of his actions towards Laios, but I'm never going to be able to see someone saying a gender they aren't attracted to showing autistic traits is annoying and a gender they are attractive to showing them is cute and not be made uncomfortable with that.

[genderlesslady]

Falling the hard way.

[ Spencer reid x reader ]

WARNINGS: lots of mentions of anorexia, overexhaustion, professor - student relationship, sickly thin reader

note: this is how i cope, if you feel triggered by any of these please dont read. also, i am in no way trying to romanticise eating disorders.

Summary: when you joined university, you thought it would be different than highschool, but you were wrong. The bullying stayed, making you relapse anorexia. Dr. Spencer Reid’s eyes worryingly go after you everywhere.

[READERS POV]

Another semester is ahead of me, today is the first day of new beginnings. You already went there for a year or so, but this time everything changed. As I pulled the clothes on my slim body, with coffee in hand, I left my apartment. Everyone was treating me differently since I lost a lot of weight.

Some with fascination, some with frustration, but non with worry. Until this day. First lesson for the day was criminology, so I rushed to the room filled with some students already. All that hurry made me really dizzy, so after finding my seat, I took some more sips from my iced americano. I left it in the fridge yesterday, it was still good thought. When an unknown middle aged man walked into the room, my eyes widened. Who is this dude, and where’s our old teacher? She wasn’t that tempting as this fine man was.

- Good morning Students! My name is Dr. Spencer Reid. As you might know, unfortunately Dr. Flamming died yesterday. - He sighed, then look around a bit. We locked eyes for a moment, and it almost made me as dizzy as pe classes did back in highscool. His beautiful hazel brown eyes struck into me like lighting, leaving me scarred for the rest of my life. I can’t have him. First of all, he’s my professor, second of all, he’s like fourty- and last but not least: I’m fucked up. I wouldn’t be able to recover if somebody was watching over me, waiting to fatten me up so they can make fun of me. I have to do this on my own.

He started teaching, this time we talked about trigger. How criminals get sucked into, and destroy their life for something that happened to them. I have been only bad with myself, so no jail for me. Maybe the mental hospital would be a good idea, but I’m not even sick enough for that..Will I ever be?

I saw the girls, even some boys were already amazed by Dr. Reid. No way I would ever have a chance with someone like him.

I stood up way too fast, when the class was over. I wanted to go out for a cigarette, so I can clear my head. Ruining my plans, my vision went blurry, and my stick legs gave up their duty. I fainted, like on those stupid eating disorder movies. How lame, I should know fucking better then this.

I woke up in a hospital, which already made me panic big time. I wanted to leave, but someone prevented me from doing so. I thought it was a nurse, but no. It was my criminology professor.

- Hey! Go easy now. You have to stay here. You are severely malnourished, but I think you are aware of that fact too. - He sighed, and soon a nurse came in too with…food.

- No thank you, I’m not hungry! I’m curious about when can I leave? - I said, sitting cross legged on the cheap bed.

- You can either have this meal young lady, or you can have the tubes again. - It’s the same nurse as five years ago. I hate my luck. I saw Dr. Reid was worried, so I took the plate. - Thanks. This was just a tiny slip up, I promise. I’m way better! - I said to the woman working here. She sent me a disbelieving scoff, and left the room.

- What a bitch. - I muttered, and picked up the plastic fork. Usually they give silver ones, but they know me already. Once I tried to attack a nurse who was trying to force feed me.

- She is just worried. We all are. - He started at me, volunteeringly watching me eat. - Do you want some help? I know it’s hard to get yourself to do it in this headspace.

- Don’t profile me. I like privacy when I’m eating. Okay? - I looked at him annoyed, but he only smiled a little. What a jerk!

- Absolutely not. I’m gonna sit here, and watch until you finish that. - He sat down, leaning forward to watch me play with my food.

- Are you into feederism or something? - I sighed, and slowly started eating, drinking some water after each bite.

- No, I’m not into eating disorders in general. Listen, you don’t know me. Why don’t you speak about your relapse? It’s easier to tell someone you hardly know. And maybe I can help. I’m pretty big into psychology as you could probably tell. - He chuckled a bit at the end, and god it was adorable.

I swallowed the food that was in my mouth, drink some more water, and started speaking again.

- Well, why not. It’s stupid tho. There was this phase in high school when I would hardly eat anything, and throwing up after I had something. It was because all of middle school, they bullied me for my size. They even pretended to like me, so they can wound me harder after I believed them. It was a nightmare. Anyways….I somehow recovered, and now I’m here again. I had some of my old friends tell me that I gained a lot of weight and that hit the spot probably. - I fought back tears at the end of my speech, I was embarrassed, mortified even.

- I saw your picture up on the university wall. You are one of the top students. You looked really pretty. Mesmerising. You weren’t even chubby. I realise they probably meant that in a positive way, meaning that you are glowing, you look healthy, and..yourself. But for a former anorexic, it’s really stupid to say that. A simple compliment would have been better. I’m so sorry. Come here. - He spread his arms, inviting me to a hug. I was very vulnerable, so I gave in.

- You did so well. So so well, and I’m really proud of you. I mean it. - He pat my head as soon as he let go of me, and I honestly thought I was in heaven.

[hiveswap]

I love to romanticise the dreamsmp fandom experience that we all had during quarantine but lets admit it, i was horribly depressed and probably so were most of us. everyday we logged on in the middle of a world wide crisis to talk about minecraft roleplay and watch drama unfold that most definietly made us feel even worse. At some point I wasn't handing in assingments and hadn't been for months so my form teacher treathened to have me expelled. I was sixteen. I had zero friends in real life. at all. Every roughly two weeks I felt like i had to distance myself from a content creator because that was the drama of the week. then it was resolved or forgotten. one time i purged my gallery of every fundy related image/screenshot because he made a joke about drugging someone and the way people spoke about it made me think he raped someone irl for like a solid half an hour... We had tons of fun, like the penis smp and mangoball and the sad-ist animatics and the cursed posts are all fond memories but at its worst it was lowkey cultish what we had going on here. and we were the good part of the fandom compared to twitter (even though i know our perception of dsmptwt was probably distorted) remember how much we hated "c!dream apologists" like yeah they were wrong and annoying but wtf was up with that behaviour. Again i loved it and i loved the work and love that went into the series itself and the fanworks based on it, but man this could not have been more unhealthy if we tried on purpose

[thefreeblog]

My dash is really pissing me off today.

I have not watched Last Twilight yet, but I have been following the show on Tumblr. So I know it's about accidental blindness and accepting yourself despite the disability.

I generally don't guess or expect a show to end in a specific way. Because as I have said time and again it's not my story to tell, it's someone else's story which they are telling. I am just watching it. I understand you sometimes get upset and that's alright, but outrightly hating the people who put so much hard work in creating that experience for us is just insane.

And with Last Twilight I am especially baffled. Like people are mad because the boy got is eyesight back?? Like really? All the fans who think that it cancels his growth as a character, like common would you not want your friend or relative who is in such a situation get their eyesight back? Be real.

You know what this is? It's not understanding disability, this is not having empathy for the disabled this is what we call a romanticising disability and it does no good to anybody. Believe me.

As a research scientist involved in researching solutions for disabilities and long term illness, I can tell you there are a whole lot of people who are slaving off, braving the torture of big corporations to make this surgeries, products available for common people. Because if we can make that one person's life more easy it's all worth it.

To be honest I just don't understand this idiotic fan mentality.

[honeyleclerc]

hi Katie can i request a 9/11 themed fanfic with daniel Ricciardo pleaseee

I was apprehensive about this but I have ultimately decided to fulfill your request with sincerity and respect as I don't know your intention behind it and it may be a way of you coping through a strategy or experience of your own. This is in no way meant to romanticise the tragedy which occurred in 2001, and I semi-based this off of a real relationship that blossomed during the horrific event to once again try and ensure this was as respectful as possible. I really hope you like it, I was scared to write this.

TW: 9/11, mentions of the rubble and aftermath, alluding to violence and terror attacks (I tried to avoid graphic language or anything insensitive or triggering)

Taking a deep breath, you stepped out of your NYC apartment and put your earphones in to play your comfort album as you walk to the world trade center. You had been living in New York as an exchange student for three months now and had finally landed an interview for your dream job, and you’d been preparing for the interview for weeks. Looking down briefly at the notes you had prepared you could only hope you’d done enough to secure the position.  

As you got closer to your destination your body began to fill with an overwhelming feeling of dread, watching as people scurried past you in the opposite direction. Taking out your earphones you prepare to ask someone to explain what's going on, but before you have the chance you feel your body being pushed through the door of the cafe next to you, followed by the earth rumbling and your ears filled with loud banging and screams. You look up in shock and confusion at the man who tackled you to the ground; he’s handsome and has a camera round his neck, before you can say anything he asks, “are you alright?” in an Australian accent. 

Overwhelmed at the situation you decide to make a joke “aren’t you supposed to be the one who’s ‘down under’?”, the man blushed as he stood up from where he was lying on top of you, reaching his arm out to help you off of the ground as well, “I’m Daniel, I’m glad you're not hurt” he laughs. Before either of you can say anything else, the building began to shake once again with the familiar noises following, Daniel wraps his arms around you, holding your body close to his tight as he brings you both under a table to shield you from the shards of glass flying round the room. When the room around them felt more settled they stood once again, y/n walking to the front of the cafe, looking at the shattered store front and the shrapnel which covered the space she stood in outside in the street just moments again.  

Observing the tragedy surrounding you, you couldn’t believe it, “you saved my life” she whispered, not looking at anything in particular. Daniel came to stand by your side, also looking around. “You saved my life” you say gently, facing him. As tears begin to well in your eyes you reach both hands up to his shoulders and clasp them together behind his neck, pulling him tightly into a hug as you sob, “you saved me, thank you, thank you”. 

You stood like that for at least five minutes, neither saying a word but both appreciating the human connection and comfort during this time. You only pull apart when approached by emergency service workers who were flooding the building, checking for casualties and evacuating the building, assuring you it was safe to leave now. You thanked the workers and stood together in the street simply trying to process everything happening around them. Things could have been drastically different, you were meant to be in that building, if you had taken five minutes fewer in the shower you could have been lying amongst the rubble where the towers once stood. Your thoughts are cut off by the sound of a camera shutter, you look up to see Daniel taking photographs, noticing you’re in his shot you apologize “Sorry, I can get out of your way”, you take a step to the left and dust your hands off on your trousers.  

Daniel shakes his head, “no that’s alright, I wanted to capture the beauty amongst the tragedy” he looks down at his camera “I think I got it” he smiles looking back at you. Slowly walking forward closing the space between you, Daniel places his camera in your hands, showing you the photograph, he’d taken of you, you blush and hand him it back, pointing to the camera that is once again round his neck “you’re very talented” you both smile at one another “and, thanks again for saving my life- twice!” you stutter before turning back to look at the rubble surrounding you both, shaking your head you tell him “I was actually on my way to an interview at the world trade center today, I can’t believe this is actually happening”.  

Daniel wraps an arm round your waist as you stand next to one another, “I’m really sorry, I’m glad we’re safe though, that's the main thing”. You look up at him and nod “I guess you’re right”, you pause for a moment, watching as people around you run to their loved ones and cry, “I guess I should go call my mum and let her know I’m safe and wasn’t in the building, will you be okay, do you have somewhere to go?” Daniel assures you he’ll be alright, and you nod at him, thinking before saying “listen, I’m sorry if this is inappropriate, but it’s not every day you meet an angel; can I take you to dinner? As you know, thank you for saving my life?”. 

Daniel chuckles lightly and replies “an angel? I like that” He smiles at you and says “Here, I’ll give you my number and we’ll work something out” he holds his hand out as you give him your phone where he puts in his number. He hands back your phone and you say, “Thank you so much for everything today, I’ll call you tonight, please stay safe, okay?”.  

You hug once more and Daniel winks at you as you begin to walk away, “I’ll be waiting for that call”, you blush and wave goodbye as you walk home, calling your mum on the way.

[decipheringthemind]

"I Got This!"

Growing up I was surrounded by many women in my life, all of them beautiful and had an unwavering sense of courage always making up for other's mistakes and taking on battles so fiercely.

I always wondered what they did to be that strong and yet be so graceful, I would even envy the ones who would still smile through the pain.

Until the day I grew up and watched myself turn into those women, and suddenly I wasn't romanticising that strength and courage any more it was painful to watch myself fall and stand up again with the exact words "I got this."

All those beautiful ladies turned out to be damsels in distress, grieving the time they lost and all efforts running in vain. I saw women daydreaming about their fantasies and life and how they would've conquered the world if it wasn't their job to take on battles and correct everyone's mistakes.

And it's amusing that their idea of conquering the world is as simple as living their life on their terms. I saw these glorious queens thinking they were queens only because they could take on the burdens and battles and pain with a smile, saying "I Got This!"

It aches me, to know that they will never know how amazingly precious, wonderful and godly they are. They go along with love filled in their eyes, hope in their hearts, courage in their veins and strength in their bones; forever saying 'I Got This!" with gloomy eyes.

[mimikoolover]

So I watched the Minimoni video just now, and 2 things:

1. I am sad that Namjoon prefers MUSE over Face. Mostly because imo Face is more interesting in concept, execution and lyrics. Oh well. Personal preference.

2. The concept for MUSE is, if I understood correctly, that all the emotions of happiness and excitement JM feels are somewhat temporary. Like a crush that just goes nowhere, it's built more on how your brain romanticises a person and less on who that person actually is. We get crushes on people based on a few minutes of interactions, but at some point that feeling fades. And to Jimin, that's kinda what his entire life feels like. As a GenZ (98), I relate soooooo hard to that. There's these moments of elation, when you do something fun, but soon enough real life kinda drags you down again. The future isn't that exciting to look at and hope kinda flies out the window. To be fair, for most of my generation that's based a lot in feelings of economic fear - sth Jimin doesn't experience- but I think he experiences a lot of other emotions that equate to sth similar. Especially since SK, like many other countries tbh, kind of seems to not take enough steps forward socially to combat all the issues created by the ruling classes of the last decades (aka Baepsae). Anyway.

These feelings of good moments and happiness being fleeting doesn't mean the moments or emotions in that moment were faked. But since it comes and goes, and the lows tend to get very low (also mental illness is a big part that doesn't get mentioned directly in MMM though Jimin has touched on it before), you tend to catastrophise a lot. It's like imposter syndrome for feelings of happiness.

As a separate closing thought: a lot has been made about Who as a song and how you'd fit it into Jikook. Or how it disproves Jimin being in a happy potentially queer relationship, but imo the MMM really highlights how the whole love and crush narrative of MUSE is just a big metaphor. It's not even about JK specifically, but I think it would do Jimin a huge disservice to assume that this album he has worked on for over a year just contains very surface level songs. Yeah, they are about love and yearning, but just like "Fake Love" or any song on the Love Yourself trilogy are about loving someone else on the surface, it essentially is an album about self-reflection. It can be both. Similarly, I find it insulting of people that they assume the "she" was forced on Jimin because he isn't in the credits of the song. As if they wouldn't have re-written the whole thing if it didn't fit Jimin's vision. Don't infantilize him just because it doesn't fit with our (yes, I'm a shipper) view of who Jimin loves.

"She" is a concept, a dream and not real. In that sense, "she" reminds me of Marlena - a female stand-in for inspiration and music as used by the Italian band Maneskin. But that's a reach. And I don't want to discount the literal layer of the song either. I personally don't believe Who is this big red stamp of "hey, I'm here, I'm not queer and looking for a woman to love, please call hit me up" others see it as. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't actually reflect how much Jimin is yearning for someone to love him how he wants to be loved.

I think Jikook is real because of how they behave around each other, and from how they talk about each other. Even the latest mention in MMM, how they (and Yoongi, poor 3rd wheel) spend hours talking about music and singing screams "and they spend the rest of their lives living together, historians call them very good friends" to me. But I won't be upset if it turns out, they did have relationships for years with other people. I won't make up theories and stories to invalidate whoever they end up spending the rest of their life with - we're not larries. Even if I find GCF Tokyo and Saipan, Rosebowl, the regular carrying and the 7000 other instances very hard to contextualise in a hetero way.

Sorry for the essay but I was kind of getting sick of all the sides currently out and about, both the antis and shippers need to chill out.

I really enjoyed reading your thoughts so thank you for sharing!

see I think for jimin muse as an album perhaps was more about his journey going through creating it, it was a labour of love and something he made from scratch with a team of people. it was probably a real challenge too and it seems like he went through a lot of growth creating this album. I think it's quite hard to judge the 'real' meaning of songs to jimin and everyone having their opinions is valid but as you said we would all do well chilling out😂for me this time it almost seems like the 'concepts' behind the songs are not as deep as maybe face was but the entire process of creating muse was more meaningful to jimin.

[ettawritesnstudies]

Please please tell me more about Otherworld Explorers Club (Honestly that's one of the best names I've ever seen)

So! I developed it in this post but the premise is exploring what happens when the protagonist of a middle grade portal fantasy story comes back to the "real world" and has to keep quiet about their fantastical experience??? The story follows four girls who had adventures in four separate Otherworlds (dystopia, high fantasy, fae, and high tech respectively), but all ended up back in their boring mundane "Real World" and now they're adults and they've found each other and they're trying to rediscover that wonder again when a lost Traveller crash lands on their planet. She's a dragonrider who's been separated from her soulmate and wants to return to the stars and so the Otherworld Explorer's Club decides to help her get home.

It's very much inspired by The Little Prince and the fact that my entire friendgroup is currently going through the 20something existential Angst of having our first corporate jobs. I'm in a relatively good position and I am militant about maintaining my sense of childlike whimsy, but it's so difficult to watch these people I love be so DEPRESSED about the daily rise and grind. I know adulting sucks and the world is big and scary but also these are such first world problems to have and we need to have gratitude!! And joy!! in the mundane joys and the small pleasures! So this story is about that wanderlust and escapism and romanticising your life and finding friends who encourage you to be authentic and rediscovering what made your child-self soar and learning how to do that on purpose again.

And also, it's about space dragons.