#wasting my fucking time
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I love it when places that I applied to multiple months ago finally respond with a rejection
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why do people say “let’s hang out” just to stay on their phone the whole time and act disinterested when i try to make conversation
i wanna talk bro don’t ask me to stay on campus if we’re not gonna talk
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i hate jury duty. stop calling me for jury duty!
#wasting my fucking time#your honor i hate my peers and i request the defendant AND plaintiff be hanged for bringing me here today
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well - webtoons is over, gang
#sci speaks#if everyone would please just read the blog at it's intended home on tumblr#and please stop getting me to waste my energy on all these other sites that i hate then that would be primo wonderful#tapas and webtoons are actual shitholes. convenient to read sure whatever. but i hate the format anyway#and how they treat their creators.#not to mention the way tapas gamifies their interface so you're like on a fucking gambling site?? like if temu were a webcomic service?#what happened to the internet being a free and fun place for anyone to post anything.#noo. copyright laws because we want to make money we can't just host anything out of the spirit of fun and freedom#what about the money??? what if we risk money??#internet used to be a better place. i hate the earth as it is right now. the internet is like a mine that corporations dug into.#and destroyed. right in front of my eyes.#it used to be a beautiful green pasture with wildlife roaming and now it has been flattened and turned into an ugly shopping mall.#the things i do for you guys who really. really wanted me to archive it somewhere else.#i''m not doing it anymore. it is here until tumblr dies or we all enentually die and all our efforts are lost to the sands of time.#nothing matters in a cosmic sense anyway. enjoy it while it's here.
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horrible truth bomb dropped on my head 20 min ago
#I DIDNT KNOW I DIDNT KNOWWWWW#when i say damn thats crazy its bc i DO think its crazy i think a lot of things are crazy. like how birds have cloacas#or the way ppl draw a five pointed star in different ways and everyone assumes their way of doing it is how everyone does it#my brother is not letting me live this down btw he literally shouted at me like HOW DID YOU LIVE THIS LONG AND NOT PICK UP ON THAT#IDK!!! IDK I THOUGHT SOMETIMES IT COULD BE USED TO EXPRESS GENUINE SHOCK??????#he says its my delivery that makes it sound insincere bc i say it in a monotonous voice which when i think abt it YEAH....#THAT DOES MAKE IT LOOK KINDA BAD IN HINDSIGHT.....#and then i told him i keep a list of phrases that tickle my brain so i can remember to use them in conversation and apparently#most ppl dont do that bc he was like ???? stop doing that??? just let the conversation flow naturally it sounds fake>????#idk man i feel like if i did that and blurted out 'i forgot people find stuff like underwear arousing for some reason' instead of#smth like 'i wonder what kind of ppl find this kind of stuff the bees knees' like i normally do. it would. not go so well.#ALSO THE FLOW CHARTS ARENT NORMAL? i make flow charts before i call the bank or smth so i know what to say#its not just to blend in its also so i dont waste ppls time going uhhhhh as i think of how i put smth into words#its called stalling for time and i dont care if i have to say smth like thats just how the cookie crumbles if it gives me#5 more seconds to process whatever the fuck someone said without letting them think im not paying attention#doodles#diary#sona#puppysona#comics
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one of the things about being an educator is that you hear what parents want their kids to be able to do a lot. they want their kid to be an astronaut or a ballerina or a politician. they want them to get off that damn phone. be better about socializing. stop spending so much time indoors. learn to control their own temper. to just "fucking listen", which means to be obedient.
one of the things i learned in my pedagogy classes is that it's almost always easier to roleplay how you want someone to act. it's almost always easier to explain why a rule exists, rather than simply setting the rule and demanding adherence.
i want my kids to be kind. i want them to ask me what book they should read next, and i want to read that book with them so we can discuss it. i want my kid to be able to tell me hey that hurt my feelings without worrying i'll punish them. i want my kid to be proud of small things and come running up to me to tell me about them. i want them to say "nah, i get why this rule exists, but i get to hate it" and know that i don't need them to be grateful-for-the-roof-overhead while washing the dishes. i want them to teach me things. i want them to say - this isn't safe. i'm calling my mom and getting out of this. i want them to hear me apologize when i do fuck up; and i want them to want to come home.
the other day a parent was telling me she didn't understand why her kid "just got so angry." this woman had flown off the handle at me.
my dad - traditional catholic that he is - resents my sentiment of "gentle parenting". he says they'll grow up spoiled, horrible, pretentious. granola, he spits.
i am going to be kind to them. i am going to set the example, i think. and whatever they choose become in the meantime - i'm going to love them for it.
#writeblr#i was doing a lot with high school students. over and over again#other teachers kept asking me what i was doing differently - why the kids listened to me. i am not particularly foreboding#and i have a pretty firm personal policy of never reacting in anger#godhelpme.#i was always kind of taken aback#because in general the kids were pretty easy. i explained i needed to keep everything “PG-13” because this was my workplace#and it was kind of their workplace#too. besides#i love swearing#and since i couldn't swear#neither could they - so if they were going to say “fuck” or become violent#they needed to choose a really specific time#because we only get “the one”.. sure enough - nobody wanted to waste the one very specific “fuck” utterance. kids listened.#i think just because - that rule makes sense. the kids understand that i don't want to be unfair to them#that censorship is stupid#but that i'm under these rules too so like let's ride it out together#also i look young and tbh between me and u nobody wants to make the nice english teacher cry#the way these kids defended me to their friends was really genuinely so heartwarming bc the Grouchy Frat Boy#would be like MISS RAQUEL DOESN'T DESERVE THAT KIND OF AN ATTITUDE BRO DON'T TALK BACK TO HER
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"The Vampire Chronicles characters are exercises in the cycle of trauma and abuse and how they are capable of complex emotions and receiving and giving love and empathy alongside all the horrible shit they do to one another" and "Anne Rice herself was a bigot and had some shitty personal beliefs and just because the genre is Gothic Horror doesn't mean you ignore the way those ideas bleed into the writing. Not all commentary is good commentary" are two sentiments that can and SHOULD co-exist, what the fuck are we doing.
#interview with the vampire#iwtv#tvc#the vampire chronicles#char.txt#I was thinking abt this earlier but decided to not waste my breath writing an essay abt it under someone elses post#+ i am at all times failing to protect my own peace but it does genuinely drive me fucking mad the way people wave off critique#because ''its supposed to be uncomfortable'' like i get that but there has to be a middle ground#between ''its all problematic garbage'' and ''genre absolves us from having intelligent thoughts about the work'' can anyone fucking hear m#At the end of the day AR was a rich white woman in america who had some Choice Takes and maybe we should remember that
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All it costs is your love 🙂🫶🏻
#poll voted ..yes …..#I fucked up the colors soooo bad u guys will never beleive#but alas I can’t waste my time and NOT post it#sigh#tmnt#rottmnt#rottmnt leo#rottmnt donnie#rottmnt au#Leomori#rottmnt raph#💀
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THE WAY THAT THEY INVENTED ROMANCE WITH THIS SONG???? HELLO?????
#'i don't know why you waste your time on me' 'baby; all i got is time!' OH MY *GOD*#WHY IS THAT THE MOST ROMANTIC THING THATS EVER HAPPENED#im screaming and crying knowing no one else will ever have what they do#like i am so serious ive never REALLY cried at this show before but this song got me so bad#theyre so fucking cute. im going to lay on the floor and be overwhelmed by yearning#mine#fave#<- yes im tagging my own posts w this#helluva boss#helluva boss spoilers#fizzarolli#asmodeus#fizzmodeus#helluva boss fizzarolli#fizzarolli helluva boss#asmodeus helluva boss#helluva boss asmodeus#e: mammon's magnificent musical mid-season special
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Y'all, I hate to say it, but no, Nandermo did not "go canon", in an "alternate universe" or through "implications" or otherwise. They were making fun of us. That was the point of all the little nudges and open questions that were quickly squashed. That was the point of the hypnosis ending. The point of that hypnosis was quite literally "Here, let's give the perfect fake wish-fulfillment ending to parts of our fanbase" (which is why there were three. They're fake. That's the point. The point is that they are supposed to be fantasies to appeal to people's hopes for the show).
Having Nandor and Guillermo as a classic sitcom couple set to a laugh track in a universe where none of the other characters exist was a jab at shippers who wanted Nandermo to be canon and cared more about that than the other characters or the premise of the show. They were making fun of "and they lived happily ever after" type fanwork. They were making fun of people who, in their eyes, ignored the irreverence and violence and black comedy of the show in order to make fluffy slash content. They were explicitly saying: "This is how we see you, and this is how we see what you want from this show, and we are telling you that it won't happen and we in fact have contempt for the very concept."
Why do you think they kept baiting the ship until the literal last lines of the show? They were making fun of us. They were saying "Ha! You still thought this would happen? After years of us saying it won't, to your face? Idiots." It's a comedy show, and they were making shippers the butt of the joke. They've been doing it for seasons now.
This is literally what Supernatural did back in the day. And nobody said that they made Destiel canon when they had an in-universe/alternate-universe stage play where the actors "explore Destiel". Fans back then recognized that it was a joke at their expense. That's what this is. Same as what happened in BBC Sherlock that one time, where in-universe conspiracy theorists said that Sherlock was in love with Moriarty (a ship the creators deliberately baited, mind you, same as they have here), specifically for the purpose of laughing at and making fun of that theory.
I'm so sorry, guys. I know you wanted to hope. I know you wanted to believe that the things the writers said at that con weren't true, but they were. I know because I wanted to hope too, even when I knew full well it wouldn't happen. They've been plain about how they feel about the ship for years. They saw it as a joke, one that drew in viewers, but was objectionable at its core. And they've followed through on that by baiting and jabbing up until the very end.
#WWDITS#WWDITS spoilers#Wwdits finale#Wwdits s6#Wwdits critical#Nandermo#At this point im glad to be done with this fucking show. Its been declining in quality for YEARS#Its treatment of women especially has been getting really bad#And the jokes have gone so stale#All things that they acknowledge with their characteristic ``lol that was the point`` attitude in the finale#I never ever ever want to watch a show just for the promise of a ship ever again. This has been a waste of my damn time#I wasnt even going to watch season six. I just wanted to know if they would actually go canon in the finale#And what do i get for my time and energy? Made fun of#Really living up to your name as The New Superwholock. Thanks WWDITS for a good first 3-4 years. I will treasure those
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this just in theyre on a date
#aleksander barkov#matthew tkachuk#florida panthers#2425#GLOBAL SERIES STARTING WITH A BANG#1619 HAVING A DATE#A TABLE TO THEMSELVES#IM GONNA SOB INTO MY FUCKING HANDS HELLOO????#oh sashas so quick with it holy shit#DID NOT WASTE ANY TIME HUH#MAFFHEW GLASSES. SOBBING.
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desmond & friends modern day assassin sequences…..I miss you……..
#specifying ‘and friends’ because I hate William Miles with my whole heart and he is not included in this sentiment#anyway vaguely this is nyc so the cops are probably wasting taxpayer money by fucking around in the subway#komiks tag#assassins creed#shaun hastings#desmond miles#this is almostttttttttttt shaundes#but I didn’t continue the dialogue far enough to make it really flirty. There’s a hint of flirting happening.#someday I’ll have to actually do a longer form fan comic to land my favorite ship AND my favorite narrative elements in the same#go (the horror and dialogues on free will and what we owe each other past/present/future & also what failure means AND-)#this ties into my second favorite relationship dynamic: clay and desmond. obvious. clay might live in my head rent free a little more than#Desmond does because that end of game reveal in AC1 is a top 10 games experience to me and I think about it all the time#ANYWAY IM OFF TOPIC NOW. desmond picks up snacks at a bodega on his way back
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Man, it's cool and all if you see a metaphor for marginalisation in the monstrous, and if you want the power fantasy of 'what if you could just eat anybody who threatened you/pissed you off'. Me too.
However, as soon as you start saying 'no, these monsters are a 1:1 on Specific Marginalised Group, and you have to treat them in the fiction like they are directly representative of real human members of the marginalised group', BUT you also, in the fiction, make them hurt/kill/eat humans? And then try to shame me, your audience, for noticing or engaging with the bit where they kill people, because you made them directly representative of a real-world marginalised group? You have lost me, and also, I think, the plot.
#hear yourself. for the love of whatever you cherish.#'but they only kill bigots so ACTUALLY they're the GOOD GUYS -' your metaphor of monstrosity is entirely premised on the question of#'what if what you went around righteously killing; believing your actions to be justified;#were actually people and it was not in fact righteous or justified to just kill them'#'what if the world isn't neatly split into 'good guys' and 'bad guys'#who gets to decide who or what is 'bad'? because that's the original problem of monstrosity-as-metaphor-for-marginalisation#(if as a creator you say 'oh my intention with this was X' cool!#if instead you go with something like. well.#'well in this setting monsters are so rare it doesn't matter that they kill people and you'd have to be a homicidal sadistic psychopath >#< to hunt them; but sure I guess if you want to play a Bad Person' well I might have#but if you're going to explicitly judge me for wanting to engage with the moral question of 'how justified is this and who would do it#versus how justified are these monsters if they do have to harm or kill people to continue to exist'#then maybe I just don't want to play your game at all)#anyway I'm sick to death of poor uwu cozy vampires who are SO marginalised so I'm not Allowed to care about all the people they murder#it being fucked up is what's fun about it! do all the other shit but let me take the murders seriously!#and inb4 someone accuses me of being a bigot for saying 'actually I don't think you get a free pass to kill and eat people if you're gay'#remember when the CW's famously reactionary and conservative Supernatural tried to just gloss over the part where every time its heroes >#< killed a demon with a magic knife it also killed the person the demon was possessing#and say 'oh no it's fine we don't care about those killings; they don't matter; don't bother caring about them either'#but they were doing it to glorify exactly the kind of people that these 'monster as metaphor' stories are trying to cast as expendable?#I have other examples that are like. real dramas. but That Paranormal Show is the one that's in the same niche that I'm talking about here#it feels more insidious when it comes through a fantasy show where there are monsters involved#so you can say 'no it's not real so it doesn't matter'#but then ALL of it is equally not real. and vampires are not actually an oppressed group. because they don't exist.#you can say 'these vampires are a metaphor for an oppressed group so this fiction matters in real life'#or you can say 'don't care about the murders because they weren't actually real'#but you can't say both and then get mad at ME for treating the murders as seriously as the vampires#let me engage with your premise and don't waste my fucking time#or just set your fluff in the Sesame Street universe where vampires drink cherry Kool-Aid and help kids learn to count
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i already know there’s a hyper specific tattoo artist/florist AU for something somewhere in my future now that i actually know what i’m talking about
#ramble#looking back at my old stuff like#the bed isn’t wrapped there’s no sleeve on the clip cord#there’s no clip cord at ALL#they’re using invisible power banks obvs#where tf is your paper towel are you keeping it on the table. what a waste of time#filed under things that appeal to me and nobody else#idk who it applies to in my current rotation of blorbs but it’s coming i can feel it#i got ONE thing right though before i started and it’s how fucking long it takes cleaning a fresh tattoo after a long session#just that one last bit of ink/blood/stencil that WON’T COME OFF
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Hey, if you have speech impediments, you are so amazing.
If you stutter or have a lisp or misspeak easily or you have a flat affect or a limited verbal vocabulary or if your voice is AAC or if you just have a difference in your vocality, you are so incredibly important and amazing.
Just know that your voice is yours. Nobody will ever be able to truly take it away. Your voice is part of you, and you deserve to make it as true to you as you deem fit. I hope you have the space to grow with your voice and whatever about it makes it unique.
#positivity#disability positivity#partially because so much of voical differences arise from disability#i've developed a really annoying lisp-ish issue#and it's hard to be positive about it because it makes me feel like i'll be treated as lesser because it's a 'childish' affect#but i literally can't help it unless i spend 110% of my focus on it. and i don't have that amount of energy#but it makes me think about others and especially those who have it more intensely than i do#and i just want to uplift everybody because vocal differences are neutral at worst#man my dad always tells a story about this coworker he had who had a stutter like you wouldn't believe...#...and he was fucking BRUTALIZED for it... 'c-c-c-c-CAN YOU GET TO THE POINT?!' is how people would talk to him...#...and obviously that made his stutter twice as fucking worse and i can't imagine the shame and humiliation that followed...#...i hope he learned that those assholes were a fucking waste of time and that he doesn't have to deal with that...#...like i'm sorry but there is no fucking need to be that sadistic toward somebody who is obviously already anxious and worried
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imma be so real with you I did NOT care for all the cutesy ways they presented Vi and Cait's disbalanced social status in arc 3
#first off the parallel of cait arriving to let vi out of prison. but this time they ~have sex~. IN THE CELL THAT WAS UNJUSTLY HOLDING JINX#bitch why are you invoking THAT REALLY FUCKED UP SCENE right before such a milestone romance scene??? it's not cute??? JINX WAS JUST HERE#then the one thing cait tries to apologize for is MADDIE. GIRL. NO ONE CARES ABOUT MADDIE. WE CARE ABOUT HOW YOU KEPT DEMEANING#AND TORTURING ZAUNITES INCLUDING VI. but that isn't addressed bc vi needs to give her head. speaking of vi#VI WHY ARE YOU GIGGLING LIKE A SCHOOLGIRL YOU ARE IN A PRISON CELL. REMEMBER HOW YOU WASTED 7 YEARS OF YOUR LIFE IN ONE#then the way jinx believes vi should be with cait as an alternative to staying with her simply because she is too fucked up while cait make#vi happy. i am sorry but show me where did jinx see cait makes vi happy. then the show just rolls with that and says ''yeah vi should be#forced to leave jinx behind and choose piltover. this is a happy ending for everyone.''#and finally ''i'm the dirt under your fingernails'' WHAT A DEPRESSING FUCKING FINAL NOTE TO LEAVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP ON.#a zaunite is literal DIRT under a ruling class piltie's fingernails. and it's cute and means they are gonna be together forever. HELLO????#i don't know WHAT that thing is but that thing is NOT MY OTP#arcane liveblog#arcane spoilers#it's like they were planning to write a fucked up tragic romance story. like they were PLANNING to make cait the bad guy. IT IS CRAZY#they weren't let's be clear. but s1 was so deep and yielded to analysis so well. meanwhile if you look any deeper than shallow into s2 you#get interpretations like THIS#''finally a lesbian couple with a happy ending'' YEAH IF YOU IGNORE CLASS. IF YOU IGNORE CLASS BASED OPPRESSION. CMON GUYS WE DESERVE BETTE
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