#wasn't planning on posting them but i'm pretty happy with how they turned out :)

[captainsophiestark]

Epiphany

Javi Rivera x Reader

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Written for my personal fic writing challenge for 2024, Sophie's Year of Fic! Featuring a new fic being posted every Friday, all year long :)

Fandom: Twisters

Day Two Prompt: "It's been a long time."

Summary: Javi's job bring him back into the same town as a sort-of-ex, but if he wants a chance at rekindling anything, he's going to have to answer for his decision to work for Riggs.

Word Count: 3,189

Category: Angst, Fluff

A/N: Happy spooky season everyone!

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

I grinned as I lined up my shot on the dartboard ahead of me, ignoring the heckling of my friends and a few new competitors we'd met at the bar. I was the undefeated champ at darts, both tonight and in general, and I hadn't gotten here by letting people get in my head.

I let out a breath, completely focused on the center ring, and sent the dart flying in one smooth motion.

Bullseye. As planned.

I turned to my friends with a grin, enjoying their chorus of groans. While I wasn't completely undefeated for all time, I was undefeated tonight, and I was frankly having the time of my life.

"Okay, there's got to be somebody in this bar who can beat you," teased one of my friends, throwing an arm over my shoulder and turning to scan the rest of the patrons who hadn't been roped into our competition yet.

"I bet I could give it a shot."

I turned at the sound of the voice to see a man I hadn't seen in years.

Javi Rivera and I had met while we were both studying at Muskogee State College almost six years ago. We'd hit it off, going quickly from friends to dating, and after only a couple months, I'd started to be able to see a future with him. And then, three of his friends died in a tornado while they were trying to test their PhD project and secure grant funding.

I'd done my best to be there for Javi, but we'd pretty quickly realized he needed some space--from chasing, from school, from Oklahoma. From everything. Including me.

It sucked to say goodbye to someone I loved, but at the same time, I got it. We'd parted on pretty good terms, deciding for both our hearts it would be best for the break to be clean. I'd thought about him a thousand times since then, clean break or no, but I hadn't seen him once. Now, he was standing before me in the dive bar just outside my hometown, apparently challenging me to darts.

"...Javi?" I managed, a smile tugging at my face despite the shock and disbelief. He grinned back at me, holding his arms out but not making any move to close the distance.

"Hey. It's good to see you."

I grinned, quickly closing the rest of the space between us to wrap Javi in a hug.

"It's good to see you too! What are you doing here? ...How are you doing?"

He stepped back with a smaller smile on his own face, running a hand through his hair before he met my eyes again.

"Better. A lot better than the last time you saw me, actually. I'm working with a team that's researching tornados, trying to get better data to better understand them and hopefully make everybody safer as a result. My team's just passing through the area on our way to chase a some big cells developing further West, and we're staying in town for the night. I was really hoping I'd find you here."

"You know, I do have a phone. And I haven't changed my number."

He grinned. "That was going to be Plan C, if Plan A of finding you here and Plan B of finding you at another bar didn't work out."

I just shook my head and laughed.

"You know, there's a lot I could say about that, but I think instead I'm gonna settle for kicking your ass in darts."

"Oh, bring it on. I was watching you, I think you've lost your edge since the last time I saw you. And I can tell you right now, I haven't. I've only gotten better."

"Sure you have, Rivera. Come on, put your money where your mouth is. You start us off."

"If you insist."

Javi leaned in close, hitting me with a charming smile as he took his half of the darts out of my hand, taking his time and letting his fingers linger over mine. For a split second, it was like I was back in grad school again, spending weekends blowing off steam and occasionally working on our project from the back table of a bar. Then, he pulled back, turning his attention to the dartboard again.

"Loser buys drinks," he called as he drew his arm back, then let the dart fly. He hit an 18, but not on any of the score-multiplying rings. I grinned.

"You're on."

****************

Javi and I spent most of the rest of the night together, trading blows in darts and just catching up with each other again. To my delight, it had been like no time had passed since we'd last seen each other. We immediately fell back into the same happy, comfortable routine we'd had for years, and my heart did a happy little flip in my chest every time Javi leaned into me with the smile I loved so much.

We stayed out at the bar together long after my friends had left, hovering at a back table together until they kicked us out. Javi had walked to the bar from his hotel, so I gave him a ride back, the two of us lingering as clearly neither of us wanted to leave. When Javi finally hopped out of the car, it was only after we'd made plans to get together the next day, depending on the tornado situation.

Luckily for Javi and I, the forecast the following morning looked very calm. Javi texted me early, and we made plans to get together for lunch. I was practically walking on air as I drove into town, parking and hopping out to wait for Javi before heading inside. I didn't want to get too far ahead of myself, but having Javi back in my life even for these twelve hours or so had been amazing. I couldn't stop thinking about him, and frankly, I didn't want to.

Unfortunately, my happy little bubble got momentarily popped by a Storm Par truck pulling into the lot. I frowned and narrowed my eyes. They'd shown up in the area recently, swooping in like vultures and taking advantage of tragedy in the community to make a profit. If they were heading into the restaurant for lunch, Javi and I might need to find somewhere more peaceful to hang out.

I glowered at the truck, trying to project as much malice and disapproval as possible. Then the door popped open, and my heart stopped in my chest.

Javi climbed out of the driver's seat. He had on a Storm Par button down. He grinned and waved at me as soon as he saw me, but I couldn't do more than stare back. What the fuck was he doing?

"Hey! Sorry I'm a little late, I had a meeting this morning-"

"With Riggs?"

The words slipped out before I could stop them. Javi stuttered a step, the smile on his face dimming a little as I crossed my arms. He came to a stop in front of me.

"I... what?"

"I think that's my line, Javi. What the hell are you doing? Why are you showing up here in Storm Par shit?"

"I told you I was chasing again-"

"You told me you were here researching tornados! Not conning grieving people out of their family homes!"

Javi took a step back, blinking like I'd physically slapped him across the face. I huffed, trying to get a hold of myself. I'd been almost shouting by the end of my speech, and I really didn't want to throw a scene in front of the restaurant.

"Listen, I get why you're mad," Javi started, holding up his hands like a peace offering. "But Riggs is funding research that's going to allow us to better understand how, why, and when tornados form, which will save lives. We're on our way to the most complete understanding of a tornado ever, and we never would've gotten here without Riggs investing and getting us this tech."

I'd started shaking my head after the second sentence, getting faster and faster until Javi finished speaking. I huffed a disbelieving laugh and took a half-step back towards my car.

"There are other ways to get grant money, Javi. Ways that don't include Riggs."

"Yeah, just ways that include risking everything going into an EF5 that got almost all of my best friends killed."

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. It had been a dream come true when Javi walked into the bar last night, but this was quickly turning into a nightmare. Hurt, anger, saddness, and disappointment formed their own little tornado in my chest, and I barely managed to keep my voice level as I met Javi's eyes again.

"I know what you went through when you lost your friends. I understand why you're making the choices you're making. But you know as well as I do that Riggs is taking advantage of people, actively hurting people in this community, and that all the data you bring him with your research is just going to make it easier for him to swoop in looking to make a profit after disasters, not bringing help before them."

"That's not what we're doing-"

"You might be able to convince yourself of that while you're riding around in your stupid trucks, but unlike you, I was born and raised here, and I never left. I know what's happening, I know the reputation your sponsor has earned for you, and frankly Javi? I want nothing to do with it. Any of it."

Javi huffed in surprise, then scowled.

"I take it to mean that includes me?"

I nodded, slowly at first, then faster and more confidently as I took a few more steps back.

"As long as you're going to keep enabling the vultures? Yeah, that does include you."

He huffed again, a humorless laugh, as he shook his head and shuffled around like he couldn't figure out how to react. It felt like a knife to my heart, but I didn't let myself hesitate before turning around and heading back to my car. I'd sat and cried with neighbors in the wake of tornados, trying to salvage anything we could in the wreckage, before polished looking guys in suits came in and way underpaid for properties, then left without lifting a finger to help a single living thing in the devastated area. If Javi was willing to be a part of that, then he was nothing like the man I'd known and loved before.

****************

I sighed, dropping an armful of books on the kitchen table. I still had a few things to bring up from the storm shelter, but I couldn't stop myself from sinking into the nearest chair. It had been a long few days.

Less than 48 hours after Javi and I had our fight, one of the worst tornados of the year had touched down much too close for comfort. It had done some significant damage to the next town over, although not nearly as bad as it could've been. Exactly what had happened was still a little unclear, but it had been a long time since one had come that close to me. I hadn't been expecting it to affect me, but my knees were actually feeling a little weak.

I took a few moment to focus on breathing deeply, then rallied myself to move the last of my supplies out of the storm shelter. I'd just made it to my feet again when a knock came at the door.

I sighed and honestly debated pretending I wasn't home. But, most likely, it was a neighbor coming to check in or share news from the tornado. I didn't want them to worry, and I probably wouldn't get away with pretending not to be here.

I made it to the door just after another knock came, slightly louder this time. I swung open the door without looking outside first, then froze halfway through the motion when I found Javi staring at me, standing on my doorstep with a six pack of beer held loosely in one hand.

"Thank god you answered. Listen, I'm sorry. You were right. Kate was right. Storm Par... Riggs..." he shook his head, apparently at a loss for words. His hair and clothes were a mess, back to the Javi I'd known in grad school instead of the perfectly-pressed Storm Par rep I'd seen a few days ago. More than just that, though, he looked frazzled. Offbalance, in a way I'd never seen before.

"Javi... are you okay?"

He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head.

"Did you hear about the big one?"

"...The tornado that just hit?" He nodded. "Yeah. I've only heard bits and pieces outside of the siren, but yeah. What happened? Is everybody... you said Kate's name earlier."

He quickly reassured me, getting halfway through reaching for my hand before pulling himself back.

"Kate's fine. I convinced her to come out here and help with research, but she almost-" Javi stopped short, closing his eyes for a long, long moment. I frowned, briefly considering what to do next, but it didn't take me long to reach a decision. Javi seemed to be implying he'd ditched Storm Par, but even if he hadn't, I still cared about him. And he clearly needed somebody right now.

"Javi. Why don't you come inside and sit down? Take a breath for a minute?"

He nodded, opening his eyes again and taking a slow, deep breath.

"Thanks."

"Sure thing."

I held the door open, and Javi didn't need me to show him where to go. We'd spent a good part of our relationship hanging out in this house, and it hadn't changed much since then. I followed Javi, letting him decide where he wanted to settle. Eventually, we ended up on the back porch, Javi settling into the bench swing where we'd watched more sunsets than I could count. He set the six pack down by his feet, and after a moment's consideration, I sat down next to him.

Javi didn't look at me as I joined him, his stare still a thousand yards out on the sun that had just started to approach the horizon. I gave him a few moments, then gently reached out to take his hand. His attention immediately snapped to me, his eyes wide with surprise. I gave him a soft smile.

"How long as it been since we spent an evening sitting out here?"

He huffed a laugh. "It's been a long time."

We shared a little smile, then after a moment, I sighed. Javi seemed calmer, at least slightly, and now I needed some answers.

"So... you wanna tell me what brought you here?"

"I came to apologize. You were right about Riggs, and about what's important. I want to be helping people, and it's a long story, but it became clear in the last few hours that I can't do that as long as I'm working with Riggs. I just wish I'd been able to figure it out earlier."

Javi shifted, taking my hand in his and shuffling a little closer to me. The apology was sweet, and I'd missed having moments like this with Javi, but his answer still had a lot of holes.

"I'm glad to hear you're done with Riggs- I mean, I'm assuming that's what you're saying?"

"Yes. Very much yes."

I smiled. "Okay. But maybe you should start a little further back on explaining what happened between now and the last time I saw you. Starting with why you failed to tell me Kate was in town."

"...In my defense, I was planning to tell you at lunch."

I couldn't hold back a snort.

"Fine. Depending on how good the rest of your explanation is, you get a pass on that."

Javi laughed. "Good. Alright, let me think about this..."

It took a while, but eventually Javi managed to walk me through his whole story. It was the serious catchup we'd been planning to have over lunch, but with the added beneift of a private moment together in one of our old favorite places. A lot had happened since Kate had come to town, and she'd had the same kind of fight with Javi as I had, but he'd come around and stepped up when it mattered.

"So, now we're done with Riggs. We're working on a pitch for investors back East right now, actually. Kate's going to present what we've got so far, and hopefully we'll have ethical funding for helping people and nothing else by the end of next month."

I smiled, leaning into Javi. The sky was red from the sunset now, and we'd been holding hands the whole time. Even though we'd gone years without really talking, right now, it felt like nothing had changed.

"I'm glad to hear it, Javi. And I'm so, so glad you're okay."

"Yeah, me too. It was dicey there for a minute, but we're on the other side now."

I leaned a little further into Javi, and after a moment, he raised one arm and stretched it around my shoulders. I sighed.

"You know..." Javi started. He paused and cleared his throat, then shifted a little on the bench before continuing. "Kate and I could actually use some help working on those grant proposals, and maybe some of our future presentations. I know you've always been happy to do your own thing, but... we'd love to have your help if you want to come back to spending more time with us. I would love that."

I leaned back to look Javi in the eye, and I couldn't keep a gigantic smile off my face for even a second.

"Honestly Javi? I would love that. Both to be part of helping you guys finish what you started, helping our community, and... for you. I missed you a lot."

"I missed you too. So much. And I know I'm the one who left, but if you'd be willing to give us another shot... I'll be around for the long haul."

 My heart did a backflip in my chest, and the beaming smile on my face mirrored the feeling.

"I would really love that Javi."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, good." He smiled back at me, then started leaning in before stopping short. "Can I kiss you?"

"Absolutely you can."

He grinned, then the two of us closed the distance as one, Javi's hand going to my waist as I tangled one in his hair. It felt right, and we both smiled into the kiss.

"No pressure if this is a little fast," I said, pulling back from Javi just enough to speak, "but... would you like to stay the night tonight?"

"You know I've stayed the night before, right? Regularly. I don't know if it can count as too fast if we've already done it a million times."

"Fair point. So what do you say?"

"I'd love to." He leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on my neck and then moving slowly up towards my ear. One of his hands moved to my thigh as he whispered: "I've got a lot to catch you up on if you're going to start writing grant proposals for us. I think we've got an all-nighter coming on."

I laughed, pulling back and swatting at Javi's arm. He just grinned.

"Okay, I'm officially banning work talk until tomorrow morning."

"Honestly, you don't have to tell me twice."

****************

Everything Taglist: @rosecentury @kmc1989 @space-helen

Twisters Taglist: @turtlee-says-rawr

[smilesflower]

♡♡♡

[pinkyqil]

Lucy bronze x reader please :)

Reader and Lucy have been together for years but are still not out to the fans and so. Reader wants to have that openness. Lucy wants to be more private. So a heated discussion is formed between the too. Some angst ending in fluff

What are we // lucy bronze x reader

You and lucy had been dating for years now in secret. fans not knowing anything at all only spectating from the sidelines or when you both would hint a your relationship without people being able to connect the dots.

Well you were tried of always having to be private. you wanted to be able too have the closeness that other couples had when posting there significant other.

You wanted to post lucy and her doing the same.doing couple dumps being able to post each other's matching outfits, date days pictures, post about each other's your miles stones or instead want the public to know that you both were together if that was it.

Lucy on the other hand wanted to have things private which you respected at first. but thinking about it made you feel like she doesn't want people to know your together or she's ashamed of being with you.

you decided to ignore those thoughts. and would try bringing up how you want to open your relationship to the public more. Letting them know you both are together. which you plan on doing this night as lucu would be taking you out to both's of your favorite restaurant.

The night arrived where you and Lucy arrived at the restaurant everything was going well she was always treating you like a goddess who's feet just landed on earth.

"You always teat me so well". you told her

"If I didn't who was gonna do it huh". She told you while rubbing your hands with hers.

"Your honestly the best".

"All because of you baby". She said.

It took you a while before getting anything out of your mouth which lucy noticed how tense you got during your conversations when she asked if you were okay.

"You okay baby your body feels tense". She told you.

"Yeah I just got something to tell you". You told her.

"What is it you can always tell me anything".

"Well I was thinking maybe we should be more open about our relationship to the public".you told her.

"What I thought you we're happy with our private life".

"I'm it just that it would be nice to let our fans know about us". You told her back.

"I know that what you want but I'm not just ready".

You were starting to get really irritated at licy right now cause it would always be the same excuse she wasn't ready or how would other's think of you both.

"Oh my god lucy I'm your fucking finance and it wouldn't hurt for you to let people know". You yelled at her ignoring the looks you were getting

"Baby please calm down we can talk about this somewhere more private". she told you

"Always fucking private with you never wanting to deal with things now if your ashamed of us just say so you don't need to be coming up with all these bullshit excuses". You told her

"Baby don't say that of course I'm proud of us".

"Don't call baby me cause if you we're actually proud you'd want people to know". With that you left the restaurant before lucy could say anymore.

You arrived at your shared apartment pissed off and decided to head too bed but instead you caught yourself looking at pictures of you and Lucy together that you would love to share but instead didn't.

You heard the front door open deciding not to deal with lucy you turned of your phone fake sleeping not wanting to deal with her. not realizing you fell asleep pretty quickly.

The next day came quickly you did your best ignoring lucy the whole even though you both lived together doesn't mean you couldn't.

lucy had enough with you ignoring her and decided to end whatever silent treatment you were giving her.

"Okay I get that your angry about yesterday and how it was handled but we can't do this if your here not communicating with me". she told you

"You made it pretty clear to understand yesterday that you're ashamed of us as a couple and I'm taking time to that".

"If you'll listen to me I'm not ashamed of us I just don't know what to expect you know how the public gets and I can't stand to see get hate from it".

"I know baby but you can't always stop what other people are gonna say at the end of the day it just gonna be just me and you".

"Yeah I'm sorry for the way I handled things last night".she told you

"Me too sorry for yelling and cursing you out".

"It okay I lowkey deserve it".she told you before pulling you into a kiss.

"Lucia".you whined

"How about we post those pictures you want huh". she told you.

"Really you better not be joking with me lucy bronze".

"Really anything for my favorite girl". she said

"You're the best". You told her before jumping to your phone and deciding on what pictures to use and how to caption it. all in a days work let's just say everything went semi successful.

yourusername&Lucybronze

8 years with you and more to come liked by alexiaputellas lj10 mariona80 leahwilliamson

Comments limited

lj10 freaking finally 🙌

Leahwilliamson look at you both can't wait for the wedding

Alexiaputellas 💝

Woso.fan ik it amazing couple 👭

Bethmead we see you both

Alexgreenwood can't wait for wedding of the year 😍

lucyfan208 I thought she was with ona

© PINKYQIL

[iateyourparents]

hickey prank | c.b.

pairing: colby brock x fem!reader

summary: you make a hickey prank on your boyfriend.

warnings: use of y/n, bad writing and grammar(I'm sorry but english is not my first language), suggestion of cheating(?), wasn't proofread

an: it's my first ever post here so pls don't judge me too much 😭🙏🏻

pictures are from pinterest:)

"Hi everyone!" you waved to the camera "Today, I'm with Kat" Katrina smiled at the camera saying hello "And we will be pranking my boyfriend!"

"Yay!" Katrina shouted. "If you're watching this Colby, I'm not sorry." she winked.

You laughed and started explaining to your viewers what exactly you have planned. "So I will be doing hickeys prank on Colby and at first I wanted to just fake them with make up but my incredible friend here" you pointed at Katrina who just smiled widely "Said it's too boring, so guess what! She will be making my hickeys!"

"Yes! So let's get to work."

You both sat at your bed and you were telling your viewers a story about how you thought about this prank while Katrina was sucking on your neck, sometimes stopping to add something to your story.

"Okay, oh my god, Katrina!" you screamed with wide eyes looking at the mirror. She did a good job. Maybe too good.

Your neck now had three big, red hickeys.

"I'm not sure if Colby will be the only one jealous." you laughed "Sorry Sam" you winked at the camera and Kat laughed.

"So now all we have to do is wait for boys to come home from a meeting." Kat said and clicked the camera off.

|||

"Honey we're home!" you heard Sam screaming and then the door being shut.

You and Katrina exchanged looks and she quickly ran to your room to turn on hidden there camera while you turned on the one that was in living room.

"Hi boys" you smiled at them when they entered the room and you went to Colby to kiss him while Sam went to his and Katrina room after a quick hello.

Colby hugged you and peppered your face with kisses and then said "Are you hungry? We got lunch from this small Italian restaurant."

"No, I already ate, but thanks babe" you kissed his cheek and sat on the couch again.

"Okay, I will go change."

You stood up and went after him while smiling discreetly to the hidden camera.

In your shared room Colby immediately went to the closet while you sat on your bed waiting for him to be done.

You also adjusted your(Colby's) shirt so your collarbone and neck were more showing.

You scrolled through your phone when Colby finally sat next to you in new clothes and in silence he looked at your neck.

You bite back your smile knowing he noticed hickeys.

Before you knew his hand was on your neck trying to smear the hickey.

"What's that?" he asked quietly with narrowed brows.

"Hickeys." you smiled at him putting your phone on the bedside table "You made them, don't you remember?"

"I'm pretty sure I would remember marking you like that." his voice was low and you knew he definitely wasn't happy. "Who did that? Is this some kind of prank?"

"What? No, Colby. I can't believe you don't remember making them." you faked scoff.

"Y/n..." he sighed "Who did that?"

You were close to laughing at his face but thankfully you stopped yourself.

Then when you looked at him again you felt bad because you noticed the hurt and insecurity on his face.

"Oh I'm sorry, Colby" you took his hand and squeezed when he wanted to take it back "It's a prank, I'm so sorry baby. I didn't want to make you upset. Katrina made those hickeys."

Colby just silently looked at you trying to analyze your words and you just stoop up and took the camera out of its hiding spot.

"Sorry guys, it's kinda fail but I feel too bad to continue this prank." you pouted explaining it to your viewers. "Look at this pouty, I couldn't do this to him." you pointed at the camera at Colby and he just shook his head with a small relieved smile.

"Does Sam know his girlfriend made hickeys on you?" Colby asked and you laughed.

"Nope, if Kat won't tell him herself, he will get to know when the video is out!"

You said your goodbyes to the camera and stopped recording. Then you put the camera on a desk and you went to Colby and straddled his waist while he laid on his back on the bed.

"I'm so sorry" you said again hugging him.

"It's okay, I'm so happy it's just prank but I'm not sure if I shouldn't be jealous because I don't remember the last time I left any marks on you." he moved his brows suggestively and you laughed.

"Maybe we should change it then."

[weirdgenetic-fuckup]

SUB SLASH SUBBY SLASH SUBMISSIVE SAUL HUDSON SUB SUB SUB WHINY WHIMPERING NEEDY DESPERATE PRAISE KINK SUBMISSIVE SLASH!!!!!!!!

thanks 🎀

A/n: This almost took a completely different turn but I'm quite happy with how this turned out <3

Also, sorry I haven't been posting in a while I have over 70 asks in my inbox rn and I'm trying to write them I swear I'm just really slow lol but I am writing, I promise :')

Warnings: Smut, edging, pantie stealing/gagging?, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

Slash had been on tour the past few months, usually while he was on tour you guys would call and get off on each other's voices, moans and sometimes commands. But you had plans this time, evil plans.

He wasn't cumming for the whole tour, it was short only about three months, sure enough he could handle that, right?

Anytime you were on call you'd make up some excuse for leaving, only after edging him for as long as you could, sometimes hours. You told him to be a good boy and not touch himself unless you told him to.

He'd come whining to you every day over the phone. "Please, please, can I cum now?" He ask, tears brimming his eyes, his dick hot and pulsing in his hand.

"Mm, you know what?" You'd start, hearing the small sigh of relief. "I'm actually feeling pretty tired right now, I think I might just go to sleep." You'd hear his soft whimpers over the phone, knowing he'd have to stop now.

"Mommy, please..."

"Good night, I love you." You'd say and hang up.

He was coming home tonight and you couldn't wait, you knew he couldn't either. As soon as he pulled up to the driveway you ran to the door.

The door opened and Slash practically fell onto you, his arms wrapping around you and pulling you tight to him as his lips crashed around yours. He'd dropped his luggage and was whining into the kiss. You couldn't not laugh at his excitement.

You tried to pull away from he kept pulling you back for more. "Slash!" You giggled, he rolled his eyes and let you speak. "Why don't you go upstairs and I'll bring your luggage up?" He huffed but went anyway.

You waited for him to get most of the way up the stairs, watching him sulk away all pouty, before closing the door and bringing up his luggage.

You got through your bedroom door and saw Slash by the clothes hamper, a pair of your panties in his hand and pushed to his nose, in his other hand was his already leaky cock.

"Aw, couldn't even wait for me to get in the room, huh?" Slash spun around at your words and just shook his head. You made your way over to the bed, sitting on the edge and patting the spot next to you.

Slash hurried over, ridding himself of his flimsy button up and leather pants. He sat next to you, back against the headboard and you sat between his spread legs, his dick hitting his abdomen.

You took the panties from him, a black lace pair you'd been wearing on one of your late night calls, and brought it back to his face, pushing them into his mouth and he happily accepted the gag. "You want to cum?" He nodded, tears already forming in his eyes. "Show me how good you can be, then."

His breath hitched as you gently ran a finger along his length. Of course you weren't just going to give it to him, what fun would that be? No, tonight would be filled with just as much teasing as any other.

"Oh, aren't you my good boy?" You asked, pumping him at a painfully slow pace as you had been the past few minutes, watching every small reaction he had, how his chest slowly fell with a shaky breath leaving him.

He was barely holding back his tears at that point, pre leaking from his slit and onto your hand. "Looking all pretty like this, just for me." He gave a small nod. "Time to take these out and let you cum?" His eyes widened slightly just at the thought of you letting him cum. He nodded excitedly and you smiled at your pulled the wet panties from him, kissing his plump lips.

"Please, mommy, I-I've been s'good, I swear." He mumbled, hands clutching the sheets so tightly his knuckles lightened to stop from touching himself.

His whole body was twitching, especially his legs and you couldn't not pay them some attention, lightly grazing his inner thighs with your nails causing him to moan. "Such a good boy, so obedient." Tears were rolling down his cheeks, a wonky smile pulling at his lips.

Your fingers wrapped around the base of his cock, he gasped. Moans and whines left him in chains as you jerked him off at a much faster pace now. His heels dug into the mattress as he kicked, not wanting to cum until he was told he could.

"Please, can I- Can I cum inside, please?" He whined, hips helplessly bucking into your hand.

You shook your head at his request. "It'll feel good just like this, just do what I tell you to do." He whined at that. Your hand kept a steady rhythm, you watched the prominent vein up him pulsing and the rest of him twitched. You waited patiently for just the right time. "Such a good boy, huh? My good boy, can you cum for mommy?" Without a second thought he let everything go.

Moans ripped from him until he went silent, his head fell back and his jaw went slack, eyes rolling into the back of his head. His body completely melted into the bed as thick ropes of cum squirted onto his chest and stomach, his body quickly getting overstimulated as you continued to stroke him.

His chest fell with a heavy breath and his gaze came back to you. He looked down at himself, a thin layer of sweat coating him and far more cum on him than he'd expected. "Did I- Did I do good?" He asked, looking at you with expectant, wide teary eyes.

You nodded and moved closer to him. "You always do good." He smiled softly up at you, eyes struggling to stay open. You cupped his cheek with your hand, still cover in his mess. "Aw, are you tired?" He nodded, tiredly reaching for you. "You can sleep now but tomorrow it's my turn~" You mused and moved to sit beside him, wrapping your arms around him and letting him lean on you.

[muffinrecord]

Current Plans + Musings

I don't plan on playing Exedra to the degree I did for Magia Record, or playing it at all. Because of that, I won't be taking an active role in the community and archiving anything for it. Of course, if Exedra has like amazing gameplay and stories then this is all subject to change, but for now I think I'm done with phone games.

The two youtube channels will stay up and I'll check em periodically to make sure there aren't copyright strikes against the content. I've saved all my raw files, especially for the battle animations, so I can remake them in the future if the music ever becomes a problem for some reason.

Google Drive will stay up until Google rots away. I haven't recorded footage in a long time (as in stories, I do for the character doppels and such), but I'll upload things if they're sent to me.

Magia Union Translations still plans on translating things and making videos, especially leading up to the end, but also for after the game is over for whatever wasn't made in time. I'm not sure what form this will take in the future-- if it'll be manual captions added to the videos or not, but I know it WILL happen.

As for this blog, I'm not going to delete it or anything. However I'm going to be taking a step back. I'd like to say that I'll do liveblogs but I mean... *gestures at blog* I've been saying that for years and the only one I really did successfully was the Oriko one lmao. Ahhh oh well.

I'll have more words later, but it was really fun to be part of a fandom experience like this. I'm excited to work on my own original story projects though and quiet down a bit.

...

When I started this blog, I never expected it to have people actually read it. Or look at it. I just wanted a place to gush about how much fun I was having. I didn't even want to tag the posts with "Magia Record" at first because I was terrified people would be mean at me, haha.

But I'm glad I did. I made so many good friends through this game. I'm glad it existed. And it made me happy to have a place where people cared about what I had to say. Some folks actually got their news from here, can you imagine that? They had notifications turned on for this blog. My god.

Anyways, I'm going to be here for the next two months, and tomorrow I'll start reblogging fan projects and initiatives, plus general news. Maybe this blog will turn into a dumping site for art and fanfic reblogs, who knows. I might watch the remaining stuff and add various thoughts here and there.

Otherwise, you can find me on my main blog @malignmuffin, which only reblogs stuff (I don't talk much if at all there). I have another tumblr blog for my comic, but I think I'll reshare the name once I actually have content you can look at on it. It's pretty bare bones for the moment.

Actually it'll be funny if the end of this game is what makes me finally work on it again. I was in the process of working on it when NA came out, and it totally derailed me. Stopped writing, drawing, just focused on this silly little phone game. Now it's like those five years have gone by and I'm going back to where I started, except I think my lil comic is going to be a bit better than it was before. If I actually make it, that is.

If I ever do actually make my comic and start posting it, I'll be sure to update y'all here. hah

Anyways, thanks for being on this wild ride with me. The memories have been great, and I'm glad I had this experience, even if it had to end.

[fulloftheloveyouwant]

Shedding season

Summary: Mountain is going through the most frustrating season for an earth ghoul, winter. The early and middle days of winter are over and on comes the late days of it, which is when antlers shed.

He's itchy and miserable. Swiss offers his assistance in a multitude of ways and Mountain starts talking about some ideas he's had. Many fall through but Swiss is willing to try one of them.

Warnings/Tags: anal sex, anal fingering, breathplay, choking, blood kink, overstimulation, orgasm edging, inappropriate usage of quintessence, blame Swiss (of course..), inhuman ghouls, and general inappropriate use of elements. Oh, and a singular bite.

Rating: Explicit, MDNI 18+

Length: 5.7k works

Notes: Originally posted on my Ao3, admittedly I had no plans for these two at first but um.. Rain and Phantom wasn't working out for what I was originally working on so here we are. Almost 6k words later.. And here we are. Guilty as charged for this one, it's mostly all porn.

Well, the season was here. Shedding season. Winter is in the later months, his antlers have served their purpose after becoming bone and now they were itchy. Sooo damn itchy. It seemed like every few minutes he was scratching them against something.

Nothing relieved the itch because of course it wouldn't, but he still tried anyway. Rubbing up against trees with your head is only so fun after a while, yet here he was miserably scratching against the tree hoping today would be the day they both fall off. He'd even take one if it meant the itching stopped.

He groaned, feeling no relief. He moved his head back before letting his forehead drop and rest into the bark of the tree, he's about as angry as this tree is. Although the tree is angry about the lack of water and not about having a pair of antlers. Trees don't grow antlers. Obviously. Unless they do.. Then that's news to Mountain.

He was still standing there, deflated against the tree with all sense of hope that his antlers would ever fall off quickly leaving him. His tail that had been swatting at the air had hit something tangible which made him turn around in surprise, only to see Swiss who was busy eating a salad wrap and looked confused at what Mountain was doing.

"My antlers won't drop so I'm trying to encourage them to drop faster." Mountain explained, miserable mood evident in his voice. They'd just become even more itchy over the past few days and it was near unbearable, but it also meant they were close to dropping. Swiss finished his last few bites before speaking.

"Did you need help? If I can help..?" Swiss offered, "If you feel like scratching the base for hours be my guest.." Mountain muttered back, a frown on his face.

Swiss was more than happy to take Mountain back inside specifically just so he could go help release some of that discomfort, in two ways- Second way was irrelevant for now but the first way was simple, just scratch 'em!

Once they reached Mountain's room, Swiss admired the scene. Mountain's room was a beautiful converted sunroom situated on the more private side of the church, not many people went by this way if at all. So the sights were pretty and secluded..

Swiss always had to stop and appreciate how nice Mountains room is. Lucky earth ghoul..

They both climbed into his bed, Mountain was careful with how he situated himself in Swiss's lap. Once comfortable though he curled up, his tail wrapping around his own leg as he let Swiss scratch quietly at the base of his antlers. It soothed the deep seated itch he'd been dealing with for at least a week.

Swiss was grinning watching Mountain go from being moody to being sleepy by the second, in calm moments with the others he falls asleep the easiest and right now he needed all the rest he could get after trying all day and night to remove his antlers. They still hadn't dropped but he had faith they'd drop eventually.

Swiss let Mountain sleep, keeping one hand grazing his nails on the base of his antlers as the other one fished his phone out of his pocket to scroll on social media. You wouldn't believe how much they had to beg Copia for WiFi, the previous ghouls didn't think it was necessary!

Anyway, their incessant begging (whining) worked and now they have pretty damn good WiFi if Swiss says so himself.. He tends to be the most involved with the internet, at least when compared to the others.

A few hours passed by and Mountain finally awoke, moving his head and accidentally nudging Swiss in the stomach with his antlers. "Back up?" Swiss asked as he ignored the sensation of being poked, he turned his phone off, he'd have to finish watching that video later.

"Mmm.. I don't even want to get up." Mountain complained, his eyes still closed as he continued laying in Swiss's lap. "Well, you don't have to get up if you don't want to." Swiss reminded, free will and all. Wonderful thing really. "I didn't water my plants today." Mountain says back, "So? They'll be okay for one day. You of all people should know that." Swiss teased, he pocketed his phone and pet Mountain underneath his chin.

This made him start purring, a rather elusive noise from ghouls but it does happen. His other hand briefly scratched the antler's bases again, as Mountain's purring got louder. Swiss chuckled seeing Mountain's blissful expression, "Enjoying yourself?" Swiss teased, "Very much so." Mountain mumbled back.

After several calming minutes, Mountain sat up. Stopping Swiss completely, he yawned and stretched his emerald eyes opening back up as he looked over at Swiss. Swiss reached out to cradle Mountain's freckled cheeks, "You're sooo cute. Be lucky Copia thinks it's immoral for ghouls to eat each other." Swiss says with a massive grin.

"You'd eat me if Copia didn't ban it..?" Mountain questioned back, Swiss's choice of words had stupefied him. "Uhh, next question?" Swiss then says, tilting his head as he closed his eyes with a smile. Reason 682 why Swiss is horrifying: May or may not be a cannibal.

Mountain laughed at his mental comment, Swiss was just being playful. At least Mountain thinks he's just being playful but then again, if any of them turn out to be cannibals it'd definitely be Swiss. Swiss released Mountains face, Mountain gave him a curious look but Swiss was staring out at the windows watching the sun go down.

"Seriously, no fair he gave you the best room!" Swiss groaned, "I need it for my plants." Mountain says back, his room was appropriately covered in plants. "They have to be exposed to the sun to grow-" Mountain explained, "I know that! But you still have the prettiest room." Swiss says, falling back into the pile of pillows near the headboard.

Mountain laid beside him, "Do you remember what we had talked about a week or so ago? About wanting to try something new?" Mountain says, he was wide awake now. Clearly something has caught his interest, Swiss hummed. "Yeah, what about it?" Swiss says back, his own brown eyes landing back on Mountain who was staring adoringly.

"Can we try something from one of my books?" Mountain then asked, "Your books? Love, aren't most of those about gardening techniques?" Swiss says with a laugh, Mountain's face turned to one of brief confusion then he lightly shook his head. "No, they're hard eroticas." Mountain corrected plainly which in an instant made Swiss choke on his air.

"What?!" Swiss spat out as he sat back up, now violently coughing. Mountain aptly also sat back up, "I thought you knew. Maybe you all just don't pay attention.. I know the ghoulettes know." Mountain says, a contemplative tone in his voice. Once Swiss stopped coughing and choking, he looked at Mountain with a mixture of horror and interest.

Mountain never really talked about what he was into, mainly because it's generally too extreme for his close relationships and he doesn't plan to terrify or horrify anyone with his interests. So he's been all around the board known as the "vanilla" one.

He doesn't role-play, he doesn't get in costumes, he won't use toys generally, he won't even take risks. You can imagine why this is so shocking to Swiss who had a perception of Mountain being the closest thing to a reserved maiden out of their pack. He won't even send nudes or do dirty talk! Even Phantom does both of those things..

Swiss was astounded, now he needs to really know just how kinky their gentle giant is.

Mountain was more than glad to go through just the books in his room, he did warn Swiss that a lot of them were downright terrible or just disgusting but Swiss thought he could handle most of them. He in fact could not. They cycled through dozens of books, each one having extreme kinks in them.

By the end, Swiss was traumatised that Mountain was in fact not gentle at all and probably wanted to be gang banged viciously by all of his partners.

"What the fuck?!" Swiss finally exclaimed once it was all over, "I was hoping you would've said yes to the tentacles.." Mountain expressed his disappointment quietly as he meandered back over to the bed and collapsed in it. "The tentacles were objectively the most normal part of all of that!" Swiss says, still breathless from the scene.

Mountain just shrugged, reclining beside Swiss once more. "Can we still do something at least?" Mountain then asked, while his antlers may not be itching like crazy anymore he still had a different itch he wanted to scratch. "As long as it's not from anything you read, suuure.." Swiss says cautiously, those books are going to be burned into his memory now.

"Well- Those are mostly just fantasies anyway. That's why books are fun." Mountain clarified, "Yeah but you read them in your hammock when outside, I never expected them to be eroticas like that." "You never asked," Mountain shot back. "That's probably a good thing now that I know." Swiss says, a weary smile on his face.

"It's not all I read anyway, I really like fantasy and fluffy romances." Mountain says, sounding like he wanted to go curl up with a book right now. "Uh huh.. After all that?" "I'm varied in tastes." Mountain defended, despite Swiss's shock once he settled more he's sure he could act out some of the kinks the books had with Mountain later on.

By all means despite Swiss's disbelief he was arguably just as bad as Mountain but he tends to actually explore said concepts unlike Mountain.

Swiss cleared his throat and his mind alike as he focused, "Anyway- What did you want to do?" Swiss asked, the blush on his face fading since Mountain was no longer reading out explicit excerpts from books to him. "Can we try using your quintessence and air elements while you ride me?" Mountain asked, oh how direct.

"If that's what you want?" Swiss says back, the directness was at least appreciated. Dancing around it wouldn't help either of them. "Yeah, you can choke me. Just be.. Careful." Mountain confirmed as he sat up, "And the quintessence?" Swiss questioned not wanting to go too far without Mountain's permission.

"Do whatever you'd like." Mountain replied back, the room was now covered in the blanket of night as outside was illuminated by the stars and the moon which was the only light they were receiving. "Huh.. Okay, my choice then." Swiss says back, a small chuckle accompanying it.

Swiss moved to straddle Mountain's lap early, Mountain was predictably erect but Swiss couldn't say anything since he was in the same predicament.

Plus he smelt Mountain dripping with arousal a while ago, ghouls have sensitive noses. Arousal for them tends to smell like their favourite aroma, off the top of Swiss's head he knows Rain loves the smell of petrichor, Phantom smells baked goods, Mountain smells vanilla.. Wait, is he remembering that correctly?

"Hey Mount-" "Hmm?" "What do you smell when someone's aroused?" "Oh, that's easy. Hyacinths." Mountain answered quickly, "Don't you keep a lot of those in your greenhouse..?" "It used to be vanilla, then I discovered lavender, then hyacinth. I keep whichever one I like the best at the moment growing in the garden." Mountain explained.

He rotates between fragrances that he enjoys and therefore the smell he picks up on also changes. Mountain is weird- In Swiss's opinion anyway. Most ghouls get suspicious when they smell their favourite scent because it's hard to tell if it's arousal or something harmless like say, a perfume.

For Swiss the smell changes drastically but more recently he's been enjoying the scent of burning cedar wood. Beforehand he was quite a big fan of sugar cookies.. Aether made too many in a short span of time and he got used to the lingering fragrance.

"What do you smell?" Mountain reverses the question as Swiss was unbuttoning their pants, "Uhh burning cedar wood, yeah. Smells so damn good.." Swiss replied carelessly, "Oh- You've moved on." Mountain noted, "Yeah, I'm kinda surprised you don't like the smell of new books." Swiss laughed, he undid his belt and pushed his pants down first as he was the easier of the two.

Mountain's hands go underneath Swiss's shirt before pulling upwards, "I do but it doesn't smell as good as flowers do." Mountain helped the shirt over Swiss's head as he was the first one to be bare, "Right- But you can't even smell the vanilla so what's the point in growing them?" Swiss was now way too invested in this discussion.

"They're still pretty even if the orchids themselves don't carry the familiar scent. Besides I tend to grow lilac around the same time to mask the lack of smell." Mountain explained his choices, they collectively pushed Swiss's clothes to the floor before helping Mountain out of his.

Swiss gave an acknowledging hum to Mountain's previous words, he was more focused on his actions now that Mountain was also free of fabrics. "First- Where's the lube?" Swiss asked, Mountain dropped his head back against his headboard as he tried to think. Swiss reached up and scratched the base of his antlers for a moment making Mountain exhale shakily.

"Dresser, second drawer under my uniform." Mountain then says sharply as it came to him, "Thank you- Now stay right here." Swiss says with a grin as he got off of Mountain and the bed. He came back just a little later lube in hand, "You use water based?" Swiss asked as he looked at the bottle while getting back on the bed.

"Uh.. Yeah, I just like the feeling of it." Mountain replied back as his eyes followed Swiss until Swiss sat back in his lap. "I wonder if Copia knows how much money we've spent at sex shops." Swiss says with a chuckle, "I'd hope not.. That'd be embarrassing." Mountain whined, "You have nothing to hide! Or do you..? I've already found out one of your secrets today." Swiss mused with a grin.

"I think I'll keep that one a secret." Mountain replied with a huff, "Fine fine- Keep your secrets then." Swiss dismissed as he applied the lube to one of his hands, it spread easily and was slick. Mountain was watching intensely, once his hand was thoroughly covered he inserted two fingers into himself.

The stretch was a warm welcome, Mountain felt himself throb instantly as he watched the way Swiss grinded on his fingers and moaned. A bead of precum welled at the head of his cock, he couldn't resist stroking himself to the sight.

Mountain bit back any noises as he was mesmerised by the way Swiss rolled his hips, or how his fingers would hit a particularly good spot. His fangs were starting to dig into his bottom lip, Swiss added a third finger gasping out as his own cock dribbled a steady line of pre.

Mountain stroked slowly, the strokes were strong yet steady as he listened to the way Swiss's breath hitched or how he'd moan quietly. His eyes completely closed as he was almost ready, stretching himself just wide enough to take Mountain.

Mountain stopped once his cock twitched in his hand, a whimper leaving him as he looked at Swiss needily. "Swiss..?" Mountain muttered, he didn't want to be forgotten. Swiss's eyes opened as he pulled his fingers free, a heavy sigh leaving him as it felt like a weight had been lifted off of his chest.

"I should've let you do that." Swiss mumbled as he scooted further into Mountain's lap preparing to take him in. Mountain couldn't reply, but his hands started to move. One helping line his cock up and the other holding Swiss's waist and help ease him down onto Mountain's member.

Swiss inhaled sharply, his eyes looking down between them even though he couldn't see the merge point. Mountain tensed up, unsure if he should continue. "I'm fine- It's just thick, you know that." Swiss calmed Mountain back down, a few more inches to go and Swiss was fully in Mountain's lap. Swiss exhaled before grinning, looking up at Mountain.

Mountain's breaths were shallow, Swiss was so tight.. "You aren't going to bust are you?" Swiss teased, running a clawed finger down his chest. "You're really tight." Mountain whimpered, his eyes looking between himself and Swiss. "Is it me who's tight, or you who's too big?" Swiss laughed before leaning forward to kiss Mountain.

Mountain was desperate for the contact, their hands were all over each other while they were kissing that progressively evolved to them making out. Despite Swiss pressing on Mountain, he stayed sitting upright and didn't fall over like most do. Swiss chuckled as he pulled away, tongue licking over his lips.

"I think we're good to add a little bit of my touch to this." Swiss says while trailing his hands up Mountain's chest, Mountain knew what Swiss was implying.

"Do you want air already? Or.." Swiss asked, giving him a choice. "No- Quintessence please." Always polite, even when in the middle of sex. Swiss could almost roll his eyes but it was an endearing trait.

Once his hands reached Mountain's face he pulled him back in for another kiss, this kiss was different from the other one that only made him long for Swiss. This was quickly giving him a feeling close to intoxication, not quite like being high or drunk but maybe something in-between?

His body was fuzzy and he was acutely more aware of any sensations. Swiss's touch felt like a fire in a field at night, captivating and the only thing you could look at. Swiss's hands roamed down his back, claws gently dragging downwards as he did so. Mountain moaned as his hands pulled Swiss closer to him, they hadn't even started properly and this was already so much for him.

Mountain pulled away from the kiss, needing air. He gasped in a mild manner, turning from Swiss. Swiss didn't mind, he kissed Mountain's cheek instead as it had been offered to him. "I wonder about your antlers.." Swiss commented between kisses, "If I could help them fall off..?" He then pondered aloud.

Swiss's touch moved up quickly until Mountain felt the heat of hands on his antlers, he tried to speak but any word he tried to form came out as gibberish and babbling. Still, Swiss seemed to understand. "You like it?" He asked with a grin, Mountain's vision was hazy. It'd remain that way as long as Swiss could touch him.

"I'll come back to your antlers then.. Are you ready?" Swiss asked, Mountain nodded enthusiastically. Swiss had barely moved his hips and the pleasure was delightful, addictive even. In this state while under the influence of Swiss who was directly affecting him, it was so easy to succumb to it. It felt like it was eating his body entirely.

His hips moved in a simple pattern, Mountain was still able to keep his eyes on Swiss (somehow) which amused the multi-ghoul greatly. "Do you need me to lessen it? You look like you're struggling." Swiss maintained a level of composure despite feeling the ripples of arousal going through him as well.

Mountain shook his head, he wanted to stay like this for as long as Swiss would let him. It was too much but too little at the same time and he loved it. It seemed to dull everything that wasn't focused on pleasure, when Swiss started to suck marks into his skin he could only grip at him back in response.

His claws were the least of his worries, not like he could retract them right now even if he wanted to. Mountain scratched long stripes into Swiss, Swiss moaned out at the pain and smiled against Mountain's skin. He managed to keep a consistent and continuous pace with his hips, rocking back and forth as Mountain groaned at the sensation.

Swiss continued kissing into Mountain's skin, Mountain was getting close already he could feel it. It was hard when Swiss was intentionally targeting erogenous zones, or spots where Mountain was particularly sensitive at. He made his way up Mountain's neck, that.. That was a really difficult spot.

Mountain inhaled keenly as he felt Swiss's fangs test the skin there, it was Mountain's weak spot. Right.. There. His claws punctured into Swiss at the same time Swiss sunk his teeth into the meat of Mountain's neck.

His orgasm crashed into him, coating everything in a hazy static except for the district wetness of Swiss's tongue licking up the blood from Mountain's neck. His eyes were closed as he whimpered, Swiss hadn't even blinked once Mountain came.

The hotness of Mountain's seed didn't bother him, nor did the claws drawing blood from his back. Once Mountain was actively more aware again, Swiss tapered off the quintessence slowly. He didn't want Mountain to crash right after all of that, quintessence has the funny side effects of making things feel lifeless if you don't let someone down carefully.

Swiss pulled away from Mountain's neck, a pretty purple bruise being left there along with bite marks. "How was it?" Swiss asked with a small smile, Mountain pulled his claws out of Swiss once he was capable of doing so. Swiss gasped but didn't say anything about it, it's pretty well known he likes getting off to blood and pain alike.

Mountain's not the only freak around these parts.

"Incredible." Mountain says, his breathing was still ragged. "You should've seen your face, absolutely gorgeous when you're at your end." Swiss cooed, brushing hairs out of Mountain's face. Mountain blushed a sage colour at the compliment as he adjusted his posture, it was time for a position change..

Mountain helped Swiss off of him momentarily as he switched to laying down instead, once he was laying down he looked up at Swiss who was already sinking onto his shaft again.

Despite Swiss always being chatty (even in bed..) you could tell when he was close by the way his skin would become more sticky, or his tail would start flickering in an irregular pattern or how his chest would be struggling to regulate his breathing.

Mountain cleared his throat making Swiss look at him, "You need to finish too." Mountain says, voice particularly rough but clear enough. "Oh trust me- It took every inch of self control I had to not cum all over your chest just now." Swiss says with a laugh as his thighs were able to straddle Mountain once more, Mountain gave him a questionable glance.

"You could've." Mountain stated, "Could've. But then I wouldn't have got back up, trust me." Swiss says with a chuckle, Mountain couldn't argue against that. While Swiss isn't generally a one and done type, he does enjoy edging himself which he was clearly doing with how he's done it a few times already. If he starts edging then once it's over, it's completely final.

Fingering himself, straddling Mountain, yeah- He was prepping himself for a nice one. "One more then we'll stop." Swiss warned, mostly for his own sake. Air would be involved this time and he didn't feel comfortable with either of them being tired and messing with such a dangerous element. So, the second round was the last round.

Mountain nodded, Swiss got more comfortable now that he wasn't actively on the cliff. He moved and situated himself better, his left hand clings to Mountain's antler while his right hand wrapped around Mountain's throat. Mountain swallowed nervously, Swiss's thumb was pressed directly into the still fresh bite.

"If you want me to stop at any time, tap me, shout, struggle- Do something just.. Don't sit there." Swiss says, concern in his voice. Mountain wasn't too worried about that aspect, he could toss Swiss off of him at any time if it came to it. The idea of losing your air is bound to give you anxiety at first but he wanted to try it.

Mountain gave a small nod and with that Swiss started. He was riding Mountain properly now that the new position was more comfortable for him, Mountain gasped at the sudden sensation. Swiss was being orderly with everything. You'd almost think he planned this.

His hand on Mountain's antler tightened as he was faster now with his pace, Mountains eyes winced as he felt Swiss start to squeeze his throat slightly. See.. The unique thing about the air element is he doesn't actually need to do anything to steal the air out of Mountain's lungs.

It's a miracle Cirrus, Cumulus, or Aurora haven't killed one of their pack with such a menacing element. They've done plenty of things to annoy those three for sure..

The air just happens to leave Mountains parted lips, he doesn't notice until he tries to breathe and can't. Swiss monitors closely even if it meant he was less focused on the way Mountain was hitting every nerve inside of him perfectly, he'd hiss but continued on.

Once Mountain started to reach for Swiss's forearm he let the air rush back into Mountain's lungs. There's an instant blood rush from that alone, the brief panic made everything so clear. The exact opposite of quintessence that made everything fuzzy. "Again?" Mountain whimpered, "If you say so.." Swiss huffed out.

This is fucking tiring! Not the whole air thing but riding someone. Swiss stilled while catching his breath, "Mount, gonna need you to work with me here." Swiss exclaimed.

Mountain titled his head but was ready to accommodate in any way possible. "You've gotta be on top now, or at least help me. I'm tired and my legs are becoming jello." Swiss stated, he was breathing particularly hard.

Mountain bowed his head, willing to change positions with Swiss. Just as they were about to, Swiss yanked unfortunately harder than he meant to when removing his left hand from Mountain's antler and it popped right off.

He screamed. He won't lie. He absolutely screamed. The antler just tumbling between the two of them and falling onto Mountain's stomach, splashing into a pile of Swiss's precum that had been leaking there. Meanwhile Mountain just let out the most pleased groan Swiss had ever heard, his eyes darted between the shed antler and to Mountain.

Mountain's tail began to hit the bed, his groan sounded similar to a rumble and made Swiss slightly shrink as he was worried he had injured Mountain. "Did I.. hurt you?" Swiss asked, voice shaking from everything that just happened. "Oh Satanas, NO! I've been waiting for that all day, it's a type of satisfaction that even sex can't achieve." Mountain explained with a fulfilled voice.

"But the.. Stump thing is bleeding." "Pedicle, it'll heal in a few days. C'mon, let's switch positions." Mountain was relatively casual thanks to one of the biggest annoyances in his life finally falling off, he tossed the shed antler to the floor without even paying it a sprinkle of attention.

Well, that was horrifying.

Swiss's uneasiness was forgotten once Mountain laid him down on his back and took up the top seat above, he held Swiss's legs up and set a quick pace. He had a lot more energy than Swiss and was noticeably seeking his end, Swiss moaned harshly when Mountain hit his prostate.

Swiss had one last chance to steal a breath from Mountain before it'd be way too risky to continue. Mountain felt himself get light-headed, his pace slowed considerably. He fell quiet, his grunts being silenced as he tried to breathe his way through the feeling despite knowing it was impossible. The feeling was getting worse as Swiss slowly cut off more and more of his air.

Then, he removed it entirely. Two seconds. That's all it took. The familiar feeling of choking, not having enough air.. There was a certain beauty to be had in it.

Swiss then released his hold on Mountain's air capacity, Mountain inhaled greedily as the air felt raw to his lungs. His head was still swirling, but he recovered quickly. If anything it was to spite Swiss at this point.

A growl comes out of him as he looks down at Swiss who looks all to pleased with his handiwork of pissing Mountain off. It didn't actually make him angry but seeing as he was now on top and in a certain "mood," he didn't take kindly to Swiss interrupting his pace.

His hand goes to stroke Swiss, he's so slick after leaking all over himself. Easy to jerk, his hand practically glides over him. His other hand was clawing into Swiss's side, his claws intentionally harming this time until he saw crimson. Not enough to permanently harm or even scar but enough to draw out the metallic scent.

Swiss gasped at the pain, Mountain's noisy above him with grunts, gasps and small moans. Once the smell of iron hit Swiss, he came. White hot ropes shoot from his cock rather violently after edging for so long, they reach to his chest before slowing down until he's just leaking. Mountain pushes him anyway, wanting more and stroking him harshly.

Did Swiss really think he was getting out of it that easily? No. Never. He presses into Swiss's sweet spot, continues stroking him and purposely overstimulates the multi-ghoul until he sees the pinpricks of tears. Swiss doesn't tell him to stop, he doesn't want Mountain to stop.

The aftereffects of his first orgasm which was so strong already pulled him over into a second one, it hit him harder than the first. His moan was loud as he writhed under Mountain, squeezing him deliciously as he sank into Swiss's depths for the last time and came.

Mountain didn't pull away his hand until every last drop was squeezed out of Swiss and had leaked onto his hand or Swiss's soft stomach. He waited until he didn't feel his cock twitching anymore inside of Swiss, once he was certain he gave everything he had- He pulled out.

Mountain promptly groaned now from exhaustion as he dropped beside Swiss. Swiss was.. Gone. The only movement he did do was turn towards Mountain, Swiss couldn't even form a coherent thought so he definitely couldn't speak.

Mountain pulled him in for a cuddle anyway, their warm bodies merging together. Mountain didn't care about how sweaty and dirty they were, he ignored the cum that messily spread between the two of them.

They'd totally need a shower in the morning.

Swiss woke up first, incredible considering he took the hardest hit from all of that. His processing speed was very slow today after expending so much energy yesterday, Mountain is completely passed out. One arm hanging around Swiss and the rest of his body laying flat down.

Mountain's tail was about as still as the rest of his body, Mountain tends to look lifeless whenever he's sleeping. Swiss moved out of Mountain's loose grip, assessing the damage on himself and Mountain. Just a few claw wounds and a bite that would probably finish healing today or tomorrow, Swiss ran his finger along the dents in his side.

He'd have to ask what part pissed Mountain off so badly last night, it was way too much fun to not ask. But priorities first, he's all gross and has a bunch of dried fluids sticking to him that need to be washed off. He turned back to Mountain, "Mount, c'mon wake up." Swiss poked normally at first.

Once he realised Mountain hadn't so much as even moved, he started pushing him. "Wake uuup." Swiss groaned, he'd tried just about everything after a few minutes. Sat on him, shoved him, shouted, the whole spiel. Mountain was just ignoring him, he didn't want to get up when he's so sleepy.

Once Swiss figured that out, he knew the only way to get the earth ghoul up. "Your antler is gonna itch soon if you keep ignoring me." Swiss says, it sounded like a threat. With one particularly annoyed huff, Mountain got up. His eyes weren't even open. "Good morning sleepyhead." Swiss greeted, kissing Mountain on the cheek.

"We only need to clean up, change the bed, and then you can go right back to sleep." Swiss enticed, that did sound very appealing.. By all means he was sweet talking Mountain into actually moving and not hibernating for the rest of the day.

A few more words and then Mountain gave in. "Fine.." He grumbled, opening his eyes. Swiss was beaming once he saw their green hues, "Shower time- Plus I need to clean the scratches and bite, don't want those getting infected." Swiss detailed, sliding off the bed first as he helped Mountain off next.

"As long as my antler comes off today and we get to stay in bed longer.. Then do whatever." Mountain says with a yawn, "My pleasure." Swiss responded with a grin before leading Mountain out of the bright sunroom and into the attached bathroom.

Mountain was surprisingly pliant with everything until they got back into the (fresh) bed and he pulled Swiss into a crushing cuddle. Swiss choked but didn't argue with Mountain, good luck trying to win against him when he's tired and determined on something. Eventually his grip eased down as he felt comfortable knowing Swiss wouldn't leave and started to fall asleep again.

Swiss could finally take a deep breath! Which was useless because he was trapped in bed anyway. Oh well, voluntary circumstance. He cuddled back into Mountain, while he wouldn't go back to sleep he could at least hear Mountain snoring the entire time which was just as good.

Mountain's other antler had finally fallen off later on in the day while he was having lunch, it disturbed Swiss, again. Meanwhile, Mountain was celebrating being antler free for a while. No more itchiness, no more discomfort, and nobody could randomly grab them anymore.

"The stump is bleeding again.." "I told you it's called a pedicle.." "Tomayto, tomahto. Same thing." "It's not-" "Totally is." "No it's not!" The two went back and forth about it for the rest of the day, holding firm in their bottom lines. Mountain eventually folded once Swiss started threatening no cuddles.

Although Swiss still brings the discussion up time to time. Mountain maintains that it's called a pedicle, and Swiss of course just calls it a stump. They'll never actually reach an agreement with it.

End notes: Three words, deer, antlers, and vanilla. That's what my research mainly consisted of for this fic. As far as I'm concerned after reading that much on antlers and deer, Mountain is a deer.

[writingquestionsanswered]

How do you explore ideas properly? I often see the advice "explore your characters desires, motives, etc." and "dive deeper into the lore of your world" and similar stuff... but how do you actually do it? I take things literally, so I find this particular wording quite difficult to comprehend. Specifically, when I'm trying to develop my story, sometimes an idea will pop up, and I get that "is this the key to fix my plot hole?" feeling, and I run it through my head, and then my brain is just SO QUICK to disprove it. Like, just instantly lost interest? Sometimes it just wasn't the right idea, but recently it's happened every single time, so I'm starting to lose trust i myself.

So, how can I properly explore and idea for my story to find out if it fits or not, before my brain is too quick to judge it for the worse?

Properly Exploring Story Ideas

Without greater context, it's hard to know exactly what that particular bit of advice intended, but from a general writing advice standpoint, I don't think it's meant to be taken too literally.

Generally speaking, "explore" really just means that once you've done the brainstorming and development to flesh it out for yourself, you need to establish and develop that thing for the reader (so, within your story) and bring it to its natural conclusion. In other words, "explore your character's motives" really just means you need to think about what your character's motives are so that you understand them for yourself, then you need to establish and flesh out those motives in your story and illustrate how they lead the character to pursue the particular goal they pursue. "Exploring" really just means "flesh it out for you and the reader."

When you get random ideas while you're plotting and planning, though, I think most of the time it's usually pretty easy to see whether or not it pertains to the story you're trying to flesh out. For example, let's say you're fleshing out a story about a woman who works for a chain bookstore and is trying to solve the mystery of her boss's murder because she wants justice for them, and also to clear a co-worker's name who is the main suspect. As you're fleshing out the murder (who did it and why, how it happened, how it was discovered, how your character got involved) as well as your character's motives (why it's important for her to try to find out what really happened), if you suddenly get an idea that she's a renowned cellist, I think you can probably pretty quickly determine that this isn't an idea worth exploring--either for yourself or in the story--because right away you can see it has nothing to do with a bookstore, your character's job as a supervisor, her boss's job as the manager, the murder (which turns out to be book related), or the killer (who turns out to be the boss's long lost ex who feels like the guy tanked her small book store.) So, this is an idea you can dismiss. But, if you come to a point during the fleshing out or writing of the story where it would make sense for your character to also be a renowned cellist, then you'll remember that idea and be able to plug it in because it's needed.

So, I guess what I'm saying is you actually should trust your gut. Write ideas down as they occur to you so you can come back to them later if need be, but if something doesn't feel right to pursue in the moment, it's almost certainly because your brain understands it doesn't fit into the story you need to tell. If an idea occurs to you that is the magical thing your story needs, it will be absolutely clear to you in that moment.

Happy writing!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[smoooothoperator]

untouchable

14: Mastermind

Lando Norris x OC (Violet Sinclair)

same group friend, unrequited love, acquittances to lovers, ski trip, love triangle, life as lovers

Words: 3.9k

Warnings: a lot of fluff and a little of drama

a/n: Happy Valentine's Day!!!! I think this chapter fits this day because of what happnes here!

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Every way of feedback is very welcomed

His kisses on my shoulder were the reason I woke up. His hands on my stomach were the reason for my smile. His body pressed against mine was the reason why I turned around and wrapped my arms around him.

“Good morning” I whispered, hiding my face in his chest, breathing his scent.

“Morning, beautiful” he whispered, making me giggle. “How did you sleep?”

“Really good” I smiled. “Should we get out of bed? I can smell pancakes downstairs”

“Oh yeah” he laughed. 

But we stayed in bed a little longer. Somehow, this felt intimate. Laying face to face, naked and with our hands and fingers exploring each other's body. Sex wasn't necessary to be intimate with someone, just feeling comfortable and connected was everything we needed.

“When are we leaving for the next trip?” I whisper, feeling shivers run my body as he traced my spine with his fingers.

“Hm… why don't we go in a few days?” he whispered, closing his eyes and resting his forehead against mine, rubbing the tip of my nose with his.

“Oh? And spend the New Year together?” I smiled.

“Is that okay?” he whispered. “Or you had plans with your family? I mean, we can go whenever you want. I only have to make a few calls and everything will be fine”

“I think that if I go with my family they will bomb me with questions about you” I sighed, kissing his chin. “Since we are practically posting pictures of each other…”

“About that…” he whispered. “You don't mind, right? On Christmas Eve we just played with it and made it look like the pictures were of Max and Pietra. But yesterday…”

“I don't mind” I smiled. “We're doing this the right way. I like it”

He smiled and kissed my forehead, his hand going down my back and placing it on my thigh, pulling me closer and making me wrap my leg around his hip. He just held me, closing his eyes and keeping me close.

“Did your parents call or something?” he sighed. 

“Yeah, they texted me” I sighed. “A picture of them in Athens with Santa's hats”

“At least that's something…” he smiled weakly. 

“I just… It annoys me that since I moved here to London they don't try to be with me” I whispered. “It's like… Once I flew away from the nest they assumed I wouldn't come back. They only came once here, and it was for my graduation and after begging them that it was important for me”

“I'm sorry Violet…” he sighed, rubbing my back. 

“They only care about themselves” I said. 

“Then let them be” he whispered. “You have a family here, a chosen family. You made a life here in London, you have friends here”

“Yeah…” I smiled. “I just… Yesterday I was a little jealous. Your family is amazing, I loved them and I felt so grateful to be welcomed the way I was. They don't judge neither ask for favors”

“You can be part of this family” he whispered, cupping my cheek. “And you will be part of this family”

“Hm? Yeah?” I smiled, somehow understanding what that meant. “I want to be part of this family”

“Really?” he smiled. 

“I-I mean… I feel comfortable with them and with you” I said. “And I think I never felt like this with previous partners. Never felt this… full, happy and relaxed with someone. You are my favorite pair of eyes, my favorite smile, my favorite notification. You are my person, Lando…”

“Violet…” he whispered, surprised by my confession, looking at me, not knowing what was coming next.

“What I'm trying to say is…” I smile looking at him. “I think I'm falling in love with you, Lando. Like, pretty hard. And it scared me to tell you because I feel it's early, but then I just started to think. Maybe I felt something for you before. Like, maybe a tiny bit of love or feelings for you were buried inside my chest. Maybe before Harry got inside my mind, trying to make me think that you weren't good…”

“Say it again” he whispered looking at me with a smile, cupping my cheeks and stopping my mumblings. 

“I'm in love with you” I smiled, holding his cheeks.

“Be mine” he whispered. “For real. Like, be my girlfriend. I planned to ask you during the trip, but this wasn’t in my plans”

“You know that Taylor Swift song?” I chuckled. 

“Mastermind? Oh yeah, she got inspired by me” he joked.

“Idiot” I laughed. “But my idiot”

“So it's a yes?” he smiled. 

“Mhm” I chuckled and hugged him. 

“You are officially my girlfriend?” he smiled and I just nodded, kissing his lips as a way of sealing this, of telling him that I'm his.

And somehow, it scared me. But I tried to brush it off. Because I know that I will be happy with Lando, that he wouldn't do what Owen, Jared or Michael did. He can love me right, he showed me…

“Let's go have breakfast” I whispered, hiding my hm face on his neck and pressing a tender kiss on his skin.

I took a deep breath, sitting on the bed and looking at him, watching his hand travel towards my waist, pressing a soft his on my back while his hand moved upwards towards my chest. I closed my eyes at the feeling of his warm palm under the curve of my breast, making me bite my lip and sigh.

“Not here…” I whispered, looking back at him.

“It's inevitable” he sighed, sitting behind me and kissing my cheek. “You are beautiful, it's unfair I can't touch my gorgeous girlfriend”

I laughed softly and pressed a soft kiss on his lips before getting up and grabbing yesterday's clothes, getting dressed and waiting for him to do the same while I watched through the window.

“This house is really beautiful” I said. “The kids have space to play, your sister has her horse close…. I like it”

“Yeah?” He smiled, standing behind me and wrapping his arms around me, kissing the back of my head. 

“Mhm” I smiled leaning on him. “Like, it's the perfect family house. Big lands, space for kids, lots of rooms… It obviously screams that your parents have money, but they did a great job with this place”

“Hypothetically speaking… Would you like a house like this?” he whispered, making me swallow thickly. “I-I mean, if we're just still together! Which I'd love to, you know. Like, we're at a good age to settle down, think about the future… those things”

“Lando…” I sighed, tensing a little, turning around and placing my hands on his chest.

“I get it, really. You don't want to think about that” he smirked weakly.

“It's not that” I sighed, kissing his chin. “It's just… I want to see what this leads us to, okay? You just asked me to be your girlfriend, and even if we are in love, we have to see how this works. How we work as a couple”

“I understand” he nodded. “But…”

“Lando” I smile, cupping his cheek. “Now I'm blinded by my love for you. But I just don't want to start making plans too soon. What if something happens and we won't have that future you want, hm? What if… I don't know. What if we fall out of love? What if this is not what we want?”

“I would rather die than fall out of love” he said, seriously. “I would rather die than losing you and not having a future with you”

“Lando…” I mumbled, somehow touched by his words.

“No, Violet. You don't get it” he smiled weakly cupping my cheeks and kissing my forehead. “I love you. So much. And it would kill me to not be with you after waiting so much to have you in my arms. I would do everything I can to make you stay, you hear me?”

I sighed and nodded, cupping his cheek and hugging him. His words worked, but still…

“You are that person for me, Violet” he whispered. “You are the love of my life. The person I picture when I dream about getting married, the person that holds my baby for the first time laying in a bed. You are that someone for me”

I couldn't answer that, I can't tell him that I'm scared of it. Because I dreamed that once, but that person was the one that forced me. 

“Let's go have breakfast” he sighed, unwrapping his arms around me and walking out of the room.

“Lando…” I sighed, following him.

“It's okay” he smiled, turning around and holding my hand. “I'm happy. Let's live the present”

I sighed and followed him, holding his hand and kissing it. We sat on the table and I didn't let go of his hand, holding it tight. He grabbed his phone and read some things about work as well as answering other mails.

“I have to stay here in January” he said and I looked at him.

“Oh? Why?” I frowned. “I thought you were free from work?”

“I mean, free from sim and anything related to the car” he sighed. “The sponsors things and taking measures of the suits and the seat is better doing it now that late”

“You will have sponsor meetings?” I asked him, leaving the mug on the table after listening carefully.

“Yeah… and the annual end of season dinner with the team is in two days” he said smiling. “So I guess I'll talk with Oscar and know if he will reserve a room so I can reserve one too”

“You can stay in my apartment, you know?” I said. “I mean… To save the money. And if Oscar wants to, he can come to spend time in my apartment, because obviously the spare room is my office…”

“Are you sure about this? I just don't want to be a burden…” he smiled weakly, turning his body to face me.

“Come on, don't be silly” I smiled. “I love having you around, you make me feel less lonely. And Oscar is a really nice guy, so he can keep you company whenever he wants while I'm out working”

“I just want to give you space, Violet” he smiled weakly. “I know you like being on your own…”

“I like it, yeah” I nodded. “And I like it when you are around, too”

“Okay” he smiled, giving up and hugging me.

“But you have to know that you will do chores too, hm?” I chuckled and kissed his cheek, looking at him.

“Just don't make me cook” he joked.

“Alright” I laughed softly.

“Well, then… I guess I'll have to go to Monaco to get a few things” he sighed, looking again at his phone. 

“Maybe you can go today” I said, leaning on him and looking at his phone. “You can go and come in the day, right? Then, you drop me at the apartment and while I work you can go there and come back”

“Okay” he nodded, kissing my temple. “That sounds good”

It was so easy asking him to stay with me for a little longer. So easy and scary. Asking him to stay with me for a few more weeks sounded good, it meant that I could wake up next to him more days. But at the same time, it meant to see his clothes in my wardrobe, his toiletries in my bathroom. It meant being domestic with him, living with him. 

Living with my boyfriend. Again.

But I tried to erase those thoughts from my mind. I tried to ignore the anxiety in my chest, the fear and panic. 

Lando would never do what they did to me.

After hugging his family goodbye and promising them that we would come back some time, we got in his car. A two and a half hour road trip, filled with music and our voices singing the songs, with his hand on my thigh and his thumb rubbing soft circles on my skin.

When we arrived to London he dropped me in front of my apartment building, holding my hand and kissing me softly.

“I’ll come as soon as I can” he smiled, bringing my knuckles to his lips. “You want me to bring something for dinner?”

“Oh, that would be great” I smiled nodding.

I got out of the car and walked inside the building, smiling when I saw that he was still there, waiting for me to get in the elevator.

“It's good to see you smile again, miss Sinclair” the receptionist said. “You had a package while you were away”

A package. Again.

“O-oh… Thank you” I smiled, grabbing the small box he held in his hands. 

“Is he your boyfriend?” he asked, looking at Lando's car that just left. 

“Mhm, yeah” I smiled. “We started not long ago”

“You two make a wonderful couple. I'm happy for you” he smiled.

I nodded and smiled, looking down at the box and getting on the elevator. 

Again, the same vibes, the same ball of anxiety in my chest while I looked at the box decorated with a bow. But I didn't open it, leaving it at the end of the wardrobe, not wanting to see what's inside of it.

I looked around and sighed, getting changed and putting my clothes on the laundry bag. 

I took a deep breath and looked at my wardrobe, swallowing the lump that wasn't letting me breathe, and closing my eyes as I started to remember things.

“What side do you prefer? I think I left enough space, right?”

I smiled looking at Owen, watching how he reorganized his clothes to make space for my clothes. 

“It's perfect” I smiled. “This is enough, don't worry”

Owen smiled and stood next to me, wrapping his arms around me and kissing my lips. We have been dating for a while now, and since my landlord asked me to leave my apartment because he wanted to make a reformation that would last a few months, Owen offered me to move in with him.

“We should buy some new things, hm? To make the apartment a little more cozy” he whispered against my lips. “Maybe we can go to IKEA and look for some things for you? I was thinking about making a space for you and all your make up there”

“Like a dressing table?” I said smiling, brushing his golden hair with my fingers.

“Mhm, yeah” he smiled. “And definitely adding a table for you in my office”

“I would love that, babe” I smiled, kissing him.

“You do?” he smiled. “How about this?”

He pulled away from the kiss and then I heard something tingling next to my head. A pair of keys. The keys of his apartment with a keychain of Poseidon's trident.

“Oh!” I gasped, laughing.

I took a deep breath, shaking my head, wiping away the tears I let slip out of my eyes, noticing them after I felt a tasty flavor on my lips.

No. I can't let those memories come back. It's not fair for Lando.

I got up from the bed and started making space for his clothes, as well as folding the ones he left here from the previous days he stayed. I did the same in the bathroom, making space for his things and hanging another set of towels for him.

I should be happy. I found love again, I deserve it. But why am I afraid? Lando showed me what it is to be loved again, how good it feels to have someone that cares for you and wants the best for you. And I was the one that told him about staying with me while he has to work here, why am I feeling this anxious? It will only last a few weeks, not forever.

What is this feeling? Why am I scared to see someone else's clothes in my wardrobe?

And that conversation in the morning with Lando… He really thinks we will last? What if something goes wrong? His job is dangerous, even if the security of the cars are better now, that means nothing to all the possibilities that can happen. Does he not remember that car burning after a crash? Or that driver in Belgium's race years ago? He said he would rather die than lose me… Was he serious? Just the thought of that makes me feel nauseous. 

I don't want to lose him. I love him, I love him so much. I should focus on that, only that. We love each other. Yeah, that's everything I need to think about. Not about traumas, or self doubts. Our love is stronger than that.

I was happy. So happy that I could stop smiling for the rest of the day.

When confessed her feelings I thought I was still dreaming, having to pinch myself to check if I was awake. When she asked me to stay with her for a few more weeks while I had work to do I just pinched myself again.

Now I have two marks on my arm. But I didn't care. Not at all.

I tried to be as quick as I could to grab all the things I needed and pack them in a suitcase, because I wanted to be back with her. I had to pack a suit and something I could wear to the dinner in McLaren. I should invite her, right? Just to introduce her to them as my girlfriend.

I looked at my phone and sighed, watching all the tags in my Instagram, the mentions on Twitter. They are talking, they are researching who is the person in my pictures. And for a moment I wanted to not be famous. I wanted to be able to post pictures of the person I love and not explain why I do that.

But I'll do it once she's ready. 

The happiness in my chest was too big to let my mind think about those pictures I received anonymously and I didn't think xfot a moment about them, about the heaviness of leaving her alone.

All I could think about was coming back to her, unpacking my things and sleeping next to her again just to wake up next to her. Maybe it was too soon, maybe she did that because she wanted me to save my money, but the fact that I was going to live with her and have my things next to hers made me happy.

I had previous relationships, not a lot, but never to the point of living together, even if it was for a few weeks. I never experienced something like what I'm experiencing with Violet, I never had that need of showing them what it's like to be loved because none of them lived what she lived. And it makes me happy to be the one she chose to love, to make her believe in love again.

On my way back to the airport, with the suitcases and everything I needed, I looked at my phone, looking at all the pictures I took of her and all the pictures my siblings made of us. She looks happy there, a smile I never saw before, not even when she was with her last boyfriend. And it made me smile even more, because I was the reason for that smile, the reason why she closed her eyes and smiled when I kissed her cheek, or the reason why she blushed when I whispered sweet nothings in her ear.

My cheeks hurt because of how big my smile was.

Until I received a text. A from an unknown number.

unknown: well, well, well… I see you don't have brain cells, hm?

unknown: you can't get an indirect when you receive one, right? The speed might touched your brain to not let you think clearly

I frown reading those texts. Who is this? Who got my number?

unknown: Violet Sinclair is mine. No one else's

unknown: I guess you'll be the next one I have to remove

Lando Norris: who the fuck are you? You want money? I'll give you whatever you want. Leave me and my girlfriend alone

unknown: girlfriend? Oh boy, how funny is this going to be

I frown and block that number. What the hell? Who got my number?

Now I was panicking. I have to be with her, I can't leave her alone. What if someone is stalking her? What if someone breaks into her house and hurts her?

As soon as the plane landed I called her. I need to know if she's alright.

“Hey” she answered, and with her voice I could tell that she was smiling.

“Hey” I sighed, relieved. Good, she's alone at home, no one is with her. “I was wondering… what do you want for dinner?”

“Chinese, maybe?” she said. “I'm too lazy to cook something, actually”

“Then chinese will be” I smiled. “I'll be there soon, just landed minutes ago. I have to get my car and I'll be there”

“Alright, I'll set the table, then” she said. 

“Okay” I nodded. “I'll see you soon. Love you, bye”

“Love you too” she said, giggling.

And that happiness came back, mixed with anxiety and fear. 

The time went by slowly, maybe it was the traffic. I called a Chinese takeout and ordered dinner for us, so in the moment I arrived they could have them ready. I just want to arrive at her apartment and hold her, check that she is alright, that no one is around stalking her.

It scared me, thinking that someone could hurt her because of me. Somehow it reminded me of my last relationship, of the death threats and the hate.

But I can't let this affect me. Love is stronger than that. Our love is stronger than any threat.

With the car smelling of Chinese food and flowers, I parked it not far away from her building. I got out and grabbed everything as best as I could, making sure I didn't drop anything or break the flowers. The receptionist of the building opened the door for me and I smiled grateful, going towards the elevator and taking a deep breath while it took me to her floor. Leaving the suitcase next to me, I dressed the doorbell, waiting for her to open.

“Hey- Oh!” she gasped when she saw the flowers. “You didn't have to!”

“But I wanted to” I smiled, letting her hold the bouquet before I walked inside with the suitcase.

I smiled and looked around. I always liked her apartment, how clean and welcoming it is, with white furniture and a scent she always changed with the season of the year. During winter she always used sweet scents like vanilla or caramel, during spring she used floral scents, during summer she used frutal like peach or tangerine and during fall she liked the scent of wood.

“Let's have dinner first” she said, grabbing the bag hanging by my arm. 

“Yeah” I nodded. “I'll take the suitcase to your room.

She nodded and kissed my cheek, walking towards the kitchen while I went to her bedroom, smiling when I saw an empty side of her wardrobe and the clothes I left here already hanging in there.

This was a little dose of what I want in the future. Of the affirmation that I want to settle down with her.

And it felt amazing.

taglist

@elisysd @racinggirl @ninifee1802 @kakorrhaphiphobia @landoyesrizz @lorarri @bellwhysomean @leptitlu @aphroditeisamilf @brekkers-whore @copper-boom @sideboobrry11 @alltoomaples @f1madison @elijahslover @silkenthusiasts @chonkybonky @summerslike11 @randomgirlnumber-13 @is-just-a @whentheautumnleavesfall @malynn @mycenterfold @barackosteaa @izzy-marvel @ssprayberrythings @ophcelia

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 42

chapter 64:

1. “They literally just laid their guns down, because apparently they've been spread so thin and their working conditions are so shit that they had all agreed to surrender if rebels showed up.” LMAO me as an auror fr

2. LMAOO “As it turns out, a war not hard-won is just…awkward.” NOT FOR LONG

3. SCREAMING OH MY GOD AROMATIC/AROSPEC BARTY!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD

4. amos noooooo!!!!!! i loved him!!! no!!!!

5. “This is what no one says:

It's war. What did you expect?”

what if i started crying, huh? what would you do then? if i started crying???

6. “They never find out why those fifteen people weren't immune when everyone else is. They never will. Sometimes, in life, things will always be a mystery.” those fuckers were dehydrated af

7. NOOOOOOOOO SYBILL!!

8. heavy angry breathing at the “13 to dine, first to rise dies” reference

9. oh my god i’m grinning so hard over their disability aids. the cane and hearing aids and gloves!!!

10. “What James wants, James gets.” 👀 *cough pillow cough cough princess cough*

11. SCREEEEEEEEE NO ONE EVER THINKS TO LOOK UP

12. seeing rudolphus cry over rabastan as sirius and regulus are watching is freaking heartbreaking

13. “it wasn't until Remus soothed him that [Sirius] stopped threatening to choke Dumbledore with his own beard.” dhkajdksjdksksjdkjsjd ME FR

14. “When [Remus] was young, he punched walls and spit in the face of Aurors dragging him to whipping posts. He had blood in his mouth more often than something sweet, and so that became his favorite meal.” holy shit holy shit holy shit this is like an iconic line that people need to quote more often. it’s so badass

15. 😦😦😦 what happened to lily’s house. what happened. what happened to it???!

16. the lupin reunion has me on the brink of tears

17. “"I'm warning you, Tim," Regulus snaps, "if you touch me, you're going to die."

Tim doesn't listen to him”

regulus continuously gives warnings about what he will do if people don’t listen to him. and for some reason, people still fucking test him

“he's starting to think he's some sort of prophet or something.” 😭😭😭

chapter 65:

1. kingsley and lily never being close again breaks me more than i can describe.

2. lily and bingley ☺️☺️

3. stop!!!! stop making plans!!! marlene and dorcas need to stop making “after-war” plans!!! i can’t do this shit!!!! no!!!! it’s gonna break my heart!!

4. marlene with a baby giving dorcas baby fever. i just. i can’t. i can’t do this

5. “someday, people will look back on these battles and describe them in numbers instead of names.” this is a line i’ll remember long into my life. i’ll never forget this line. genuinely

6. “"Hi," Sirius greets warmly when the door opens. His eyes are sparkling. Pretty, pretty, pretty.

Remus nearly melts. "Hi."

"Is that boy of yours at the door?" Lyall calls out, and Remus grins the moment Sirius looks delighted and flustered by this title, his face turning red.”

same vibe

7. remus and lyall fucking with sirius is written genius 😭😭😭

8. sirius is literal just kissing and biting and sucking all over remus’ neck and ears, and remus is literally talking about how people died 😭😭😭 wtf that’s so them fr

9. remus and sirius are the ultimate ship to me, forever and always. to me, they’re more canon than harry and ginny or like ron and hermione. i love them, your honor

10. “the mere thought makes him feel entirely too happy to describe. So, naturally, he treats it with suspicion”

bruh this is like harry resisting the imperious curse 😭😭😭

11. knife kink james is back y’all. reg is like “i’ll never hurt you with a dagger.” and james is like, “oh. 😞” BYE

[ddwcaph-game]

The F6E Parents as Sims!

Sooo this is what I've been busy with the past week. 😅

I've wanted to do this for a while now, both to recover from the update, and to get a better idea of what I want their character art to look like.

I used some height/fitness mods, but I tried to use as few CC as possible (mostly because it's annoying trying to hunt for the perfect ones). Some of the colors/styles aren't accurate of course, but I'm happy with the results for the most part. If anyone's interested, I might upload all the families to the gallery later (I need to remove the spoilery elements), along with links to the CCs.

Nestor and Mary

I gotta be honest, I was kinda lazy when I made the photo of Mary in Chapter 4, so this is a more accurate image of what Mary looks like in that photo (just imagine her with much longer hair). I mostly picked that outfit for Nestor because it has a lil chicken on it (it's the closest I can get to The NeStore logo), but it seems appropriate for his work anyway.

Josephine and Mariano

I didn't want to make Josy and Mario elders, but I honestly think they look better that way, hehe. They're wearing their everyday outfit since I'm still not sure what they're wearing during Rosie's party. Although... I might actually change Mario from bald to semi-bald like he is here.

Danica and Ma'am Bianes

Okay, Ma'am Bianes isn't Lily's police-mom, but I don't really have a clear idea on what Rickie looks like yet. 😅 Both of their outfits here are pretty close to their respective appearances so far, but just imagine that Dani's arm tattoo is WAY more elaborate.

Stephanie and JM Sr.

I found an outfit that's totally accurate to Tita Steph's current description in the story, but it made me remember that she's a feng shui expert and I think red suits her more than plain black in this case. I'll see if I can find a cane mod/cc for her later.

You don't really meet JM's dad in the story, but here he is anyway, hehe. He's much more grumpy looking in the close up.

Yaya Connie and Kuya Popoy

Not much to say here, but I like how both of them turned out since I didn't have a clear idea of what they both looked like before this. I wasn't planning on giving Connie short hair, but I think it fits her a lot. Just make the trim and ribbon in her outfit black and it's perfect.

Julie and Robert

Out of everyone, I think I'm satisfied with Julie and Robert the most. I can't find a good LT uniform-looking outfit for Robert without CC, so here he is with Julie's favorite shawl instead. Well, it doesn't have any patterns, but even with CC it's annoying to look for scarves/shawls separate from the outfits that aren't tightly wrapped around the neck.

***

Maggie and MC's Dad aren't here for obvious reasons, but I might make Maggie's original version later.

Anyway, I made the characters in IAC too! You can find the post here. Major spoiler warning, of course.

If you're curious, I showed F6E here too a while back, but that one's old and outdated. I kinda want to make them as teens/young adults now though.

[come-away-with-me87]

The Art of Love Chapter 10

Chapter 9 here

******

Warnings: This chapter is a lil angsty. Also, sorry for the long delays in posting chapters on this. I've been going through it lately, I'm just not my best self atm. But I promise to finish this story to the very end. Also, I haven't forgotten the two Aizawa requests I received; my hope is to write at least one of them this weekend when my brain is hopefully refreshed. As always, thank you for reading <3

******

You and Shouta went on various dates over the course of the next few weeks.  You went out to eat at a few nice restaurants, you went to a cat cafe where you both discovered your mutual adoration for cats (as well as coffee), he came over to your house, where you cooked him dinner a few times.  You two had not put a label on your...whatever it was you were doing, nor had you slept together yet.  You weren't quite ready for that step, and something told you Shouta wasn't ready yet either.  All you've done so far was kiss, and that was okay with you.  Things were going well.

By getting to know Shouta, you also got to know Eri better, especially on the evenings where you would go to the Heights Alliance campus to visit him.  You sat in on one of his training sessions with her; the patience he demonstrated was very admirable.  You could tell he was a man with a heart of gold with the way he acted towards her.  Eri also seemed genuinely happy to have you around.  At school, she seemed to blossom into a whole new girl.  She became better friends with Hana, and started interacting with other students.

Her artwork at school even became brighter and more colorful over the course of the weeks; no longer were they just shades of purple, green, and black.  Over the course of those few weeks, you also got to meet Izuku Midoriya, who you could tell Eri absolutely adored.  Izuku came with Mirio one day after school to pick Eri up, and you could've sworn two celebrities just walked into the classroom with the way she reacted when she saw them.  You remembered the story Shouta told you about when Eri was rescued; this Izuku and Mirio were her saviors.  You pulled Izuku and Mirio to the side that day saying, "Mr. Aizawa told me her story, and I can't thank you both enough for what you did to save her from that awful fate."  

One Friday evening after work, you had no plans.  You decided to pick up some sashimi from one of your favorite restaurants, and you made your way home to have some you time. You got home, put on your most comfortable pajama set, poured yourself a glass of wine, and sat down in front of your television with your sashimi.  You were flipping through channels, when you came across the news channel with some breaking news.  The League of Villains had teamed up with the Meta Liberation Army, and renamed themselves The Paranormal Liberation Front.  This could not possibly be good.

You texted Shouta telling him to turn on the news.  He just replied, "I'm already watching."  You thought to yourself again how this could not be good.  You had a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach; something bad was going to happen.  You texted Shouta again, "what does this mean?"  He responded back, "I don't know yet, but it can't be good."  For Shouta to say that meant it was a serious matter.  You decided to flip the channel to something a little more mindless, something that didn't make you think.  There was a reality dating show on, so you watched that for the remainder of your evening instead.  

Around 11:00pm, you found yourself starting to get tired.  You had a date with Shouta the following day; you two were going on a picnic at a nearby park for lunch.  So you decided to call it a night and go to bed so you could be nice and refreshed for your date tomorrow.  You did your usual nightly routine of brushing your teeth and washing your face, then made your way to bed.  You were more tired than you realized, and you were pretty much out the moment the head hit the pillow.  Unfortunately, what followed after you fell asleep were a series of lucid nightmares.  

Your first nightmare was your memory of the hospital that Kento was in when he was attacked.  You were standing over his lifeless body in the bed in the hospital room, feeling heartbroken, yet numb.  You knew you were dreaming, so why were you living this moment over again?  You looked around the room to see if you could find a way to wake up, and when you looked down at the bed again, this time it was Shouta's lifeless body laying there.  You still knew you were dreaming, but you clasped your hands over your mouth to stifle yourself from screaming.

Suddenly, you were no longer in the hospital room.  This time, you were at a funeral.  It was set up very much like Kento's funeral, but there was something different about it.  When you looked at the body in the casket, you once again saw Shouta's body laying there.  The people and faces around you were all blurry; Shouta was the only one you could see clearly.  In your nightmare, you were in a never ending loop of being in the hospital room, then at the funeral, then back in the hospital room, then at the funeral again.  And it was always Shouta's body you were seeing.

The nightmare finally ended with you waking up in a cold sweat and hyperventilating.  You had to get up from your bed, go to your bathroom, and splash some cold water on your face.  "It was only a dream," you told yourself.  You looked at your phone; at that point, it was 3:00am.  You went back to bed in an attempt to fall asleep, but you were wide awake at that point.  You tossed and turned for the remainder of the night, thinking about the nightmares you had and what significance they had.  Why were you seeing Shouta's body?

Around 6:30am, you finally got out of bed, giving up on the idea of trying to fall back asleep.  You couldn't help it, but you thought there had to be some sort of significance behind your nightmare.  Shouta was a pro-hero; he would be able to protect himself and those around him.  But at the same time, he wasn't invincible.  You've heard of pro-heroes dying all the time.  At that point, you put on a pot of coffee, sat down on your couch, and pulled out your phone.  You texted Shouta and lied, saying "hey Shouta, I'm not feeling very well today, I'm not going to be able to make our picnic date. I'm sorry."

******

To be continued...

******

Tag list: @lili-pond ; @jaguarthecat ; @big-denki-energy ; @ivydoesit23 ; @salientseraph ; @dreamofkaty ; @simp-hub ; @bluebreadenthusiast ; @fuzzyfestcat

[blackknight-100]

I'm absolutely obsessed with how mythology portrays parent-child relationships, especially when at least one divine party is involved. I've talked about Karna and Arjuna's relationship with their fathers, and how it might tie up to their characters and situations, and the Mahabharata as a whole, but they're not the only ones! Speaking exclusively about father-son dynamics in this post, and we have a lot of them!

You have Yudhisthira, whose father Yama/Dharma shows up in his son's mortal life twice (iirc), gives him a 20 min quiz each time and then tells him that no son, we don't allow dogs in heaven (which, how dare, but we all have that one parent). This is so in line with Yudhisthira's arc, poor man that he is, having to spend his whole life finding answers to questions about righteousness and honour, losing his friends, brothers, wife and children in the process.

Rama-Dasharatha and Ganesha-Shiva are pretty straightforward - there's plenty of mutual love and respect despite the horrors ™️ , but then there is Rama and Luv-Kush. If you're counting the Uttar Kand, then these boys literally saw their mother die because there father could not stop questioning her honour. That has to mess with your head. There's no way it's a happily ever after story.

Another man who interests me greatly is Yayati. Like sir... what were you doing. Who grows old and thinks, "You know what would be great? Me borrowing my son's youth" and then curses them when they refuse? What were you thinking. What were your kids thinking. I need to take your heads apart with a scalpel, this is so incredibly insane. A father should give to his children - the only thing this man "gave" was to spare Puru from his curse.

You have Bhishma and Shantanu, another wild story. I understand that Bhishma chose to give up his birthright to make Shantanu happy, but can you actually tell me Shantanu wasn't at least somewhat interested in the plan? Shantanu is Bhishma's father, it's his job to stop him from doing things like this. I feel like pulling my hair out everytime I think of this. You can tell that Bhishma was afraid for his father's well-being when he made this decision, and that so... unfair.

On the other end of the spectrum are Krishna and Vasudeva, who are wholesome to the point of despair. Vasudeva giving up his everything just to get his boy out of prison?? Waiting years and years for him, but never lamenting or cursing Krishna for not coming fast enough??? That's peak fatherhood (Shantanu take lessons). And Krishna honours that sacrifice!! He comes from idyllic Vrindavan, slays the tormentor of his parents and rips the bars of their prison!!! And that old married couple trapped within those dank, dreary walls, with no one except the other for company, watches their godly son turn up to free them and show them the sky for the first time in more than a decade - the thought of it brings me to tears. Possibly the only part I like about the change from baby!Krishna to adult!Krishna is his reunion with Vasudeva and Devaki!

Oh, and last but not least, our favourite problematic pair: Jamadagni and sons. I'm slightly terrified by how Jamadagni was like "kill your mother for me she's sinful >:(" and when four sons refused, he actually killed them. HIS OWN SONS! Admittedly, in some versions he asks Parashuram to do the killing but like... those are his brothers. Who probably swaddled him and rocked him and fed him and played with him. And all this is presumably happening right in front of Renuka. And then Parashuram has to kill his mother as well, unless he wants to be a heap of ashes.

(In some versions, including the one I've always heard as a child, Parashuram is said to be "aware of" his father's immense power, which just seems to me a really polite way to say that Parashuram knew disobeying his father had consequences ™️ that weren't always right or rational)

Worse, after the killing is done, Jamadagni is so pleased he offers Parashuram a boon, presumably with the remains of the rest of his family still nearby, and when Parashuram asks for his mother and brother to be revived, Jamadagni is all like "ooh actually I got really angry, I think I'm going to renounce rage forever. Dw btw your brothers and mother forgot you killed them you're welcome <3"

Sir??? This is what you got out of the whole issue???? No wonder Parashuram killed a whole bunch of kings, this couldn't have been healthy.

[punkshort]

what are roommates joel and readers love languages? Or is this something you'd answer later once they're together hehe

I held onto this ask so I could answer it closer to the end of the series, and since the final chapter is posting on Saturday, I figured it would be a good time to discuss!

I'm going to talk about their receiving love languages first.

I think reader's receiving love language is Quality Time. She enjoys watching movies together with Joel at the beginning of their story, then once they moved in together she liked cooking dinner with him for the house or running errands for the party. I think in those moments, they learned the most about each other and it really cemented the building blocks of their relationship.

Joel's receiving love language was a tough one. I initially wanted to say Physical touch, but I kept coming back to how hopeless he felt when he would see reader with another man and how it just seemed to consume him, so I landed on Words of Affirmation. Even though he and reader were having sex and spending the night together from time to time, it wasn't fulfilling enough for him. He wanted to hear her say she wanted him. He desperately wanted to know that what they had was more than just a physical connection. He had his suspicions, but reader couldn't just come out and say it, and it made him insecure. "We ever gonna talk 'bout last weekend or you gonna keep pretending you're happy with him?" How badly he wanted to track down reader after the wedding rehearsal to try to drag the truth out of her after her "I was so fucking stupid" comment, and even after their speeches at the wedding when he, in his own way, asked if she was in love with him when they were together. "You ever have that?" he asked ... "Friendship that turns into love?" Like, he needed to hear it.

So their giving love languages I think are the same. At least, at the end of the story, they are pretty clearly Acts of Service. Reader enlisted the help from a therapist to deal with her insecurities and work through her complicated feelings for Joel because he meant so much to her, she was willing to find a way to make it work, despite her reservations about his job. Sure, most people would have an issue dating a pornstar, but reader went ahead and had a prolonged affair with him anyway, knowing full well what he did for a living. And as Tommy pointed out, why wasn't it an issue for her then? Joel told her time and time again that his job is just a job, but she couldn't trust him. So by seeking treatment, she was looking to get to the root of her issues so she could go to him and say, 'Here. I had a problem, I'm working on it, I am in a good place now, please let me prove it to you.'

And the same goes for Joel. He wanted to do whatever it took so reader would give him a chance and he quit his job. It took a few months to finish up his contracts and he had to come up with a backup plan, which was complicated and scary in its own right. But the biggest takeaway was they both did these things without even knowing for sure the other would be willing to try again and make a relationship work, but they hoped a grand gesture would be enough to prove their love for one another.

These are just my opinions, if you guys have any other thoughts I would love to hear them!

[dreambunnynotes]

daily reflection: nov. 16th ❤︎

good morning lovely friends! here is what i accomplished and what i could have improved today, to hold myself accountable. it was really effective for me to know that i had posted my goals list on tumblr yesterday where others could see it; whenever i felt like giving in to my adhd brain that tells me that tasks are to be feared, i would simply remember that i had kind folks online who were interested in seeing me succeed hehe, it helped me so much! here is my first day ❤︎

accomplishments:

i completed all of my cleaning goals and more! it turned into a deeper clean than i thought it would be which felt really nice (and is usually how it goes once i get cleaning). it's so lovely to be able to start fresh with a clean working and sleeping space; it's so much easier to feel inspired, be productive, and take care of yourself when your environment is as ready for you as you are for it!

i wasn't going to complete all of my texting and calling tasks, BUT I DID! these types of tasks are the hardest for me to get done because i have pretty intense social anxiety and rejection sensitive dysphoria, and communicating with others both online and offline takes a lot of mental preparation and energy for me. but i did it, and i am so, so proud of myself! in fact...

self-compassion:

not only did i accomplish my original communication goals, i also ended up replying to two friends i hadn't seen in a long time, even though i was anxious! both of them were at my sister's show last night and i was so surprised to see them and a couple of other friends that i had to go have a bathroom cry from the anxiety lol. i had so many emotions coming up; the first was sadness and shame seeing that they had all come in a group together and that i wasn't with them. i joined them two seconds after i saw everyone, but the sadness was still there because i was positive they would have invited me into the group earlier if i had been less isolated this last year, which is where the guilt came in. i realized i had been isolating from my friends for so long out of fear that i wasn't wanted, didn't provide anything to them, and that maybe i didn't have people i liked being around after all, but that is so, so far from the truth; i do have friends who love me and who i love, and all of them were so loving, so kind, and actually sent me messages after the show telling me how much they loved me and how happy they were to see me! it made me cryyyy and feel so many feelings. i have plans to see them next week, and i actually feel like i'm overcoming my isolation era at long last; i'm really proud of myself for having self-compassion and using tools i've learned in therapy to better my life! :')

my next step is to learn more about and overcome this shame i have around letting my friends love me for who i am; the only way to learn more about it is to actually make plans to see friends and be vulnerable; wish me luck 😭💗

improvements to make:

as for my other tasks; i cleaned out one of my emails, but i have so many email accounts that it felt a little bit lacklustre to call that an accomplishment. today i'd like to break down how big the task of consolidating my digital life will actually be so that i can take measurable and consistent steps towards completing my goal (writing that sentence is baffling me right now - bunny from a few days ago never would have realized how much writing out her goals could help her in being less afraid of them! this feels like a huge accomplishment for my adhd brain!)

today felt like a really successful day, and i'm super proud of myself! this was only the beginning of what i actually want to accomplish in a day, but it was such a great way to try it out. i'm excited to see where this journey takes me and how these daily checklists and reflections will affect my productivity; they already have helped so much! if you've made it to the end of this, thank you for taking the time to read about my day, it means so much to me! lets try our best to have another successful day! ❤︎

[eldaryasharbinger]

MCL New Gen Ep. 7 Review

As I'm getting ready to play episode 8, I'm taking the time to finish my ep 7 review!! Stay tuned as I plan to play it right after I post it, so my long awaited (let's pretend) opinion on the controversial episode 8 will come soon!!

As per usual, everything goes below the cut!

Let's start with some of the screenshots I took, since I believe these are what I mainly wanted to talk about!

This doesn't have much relevance, but I thought it was funny since it used to happen to me too, I've learned to keep the volume of my computer muted and I've realized it doesn't make any sounds at start up, but it still happens sometimes that I forget the volume all the way up after I showed my work to my boss the previous day, and I always get startled by it in the morning,, (I edit videos and I usually tend to keep the volume on the low, but he's always complaining thay he can't hear it so he turns it up so much that pretty much all the office can hear it, unnecessary but very funny at times since we usually joke about it😭)

Most hated moment for me so far, It made me so incredibly uncomfortable and that's because I've hears these exact words, in a much more negative way, and it kind of triggered the bad memories that come with it

I find it INSANE that Candy's mother would rather her adult daughter get late at her job because of her other daughter, that's also skipping classes, is occupying the bathroom

Others have pointed out that how come a renowned architect such as her mother, planned a house with only one bathroom?? I'm NOT buying the whole "you both will eventually move out" thing because then what's the point of giving them their own rooms? for future guests? she seriously made a huge-ass house, pool included, to only have one bathroom? Stupid as fuck and NOT THOUGHT AT ALL on Beemoov's part (what a surprise...)

And since I've been in a similar situation, let me tell you that this is the most egoistic thing a mother can say. Who knows when she'll get to move out? Why make them suffer like this just because you were too lazy to make another bathroom?

My real life version of course doesn't exactly involve bathrooms, but my mom decided to buy a house that's fit for a single person/couple, and there's three of us living here, so I ended up having to share a room (and king-sized bed) with my sister that is 10 years older than me with whom I have a strained relationship, the lack of privacy and time to myself is still impacting my everyday life, and don't let me start talking about the storage space because it's critical.

Her decision to buy this house when she fully knew that I definitely wouldn't manage to get my own place that soon was so egoistical, we've told her plenty of times but she never listened and went on.

I wasn't that sure about Zahra and Tasha, but after this episode I definitely do not like them at all, I don't know if Beemoov did it on purpose, I doubt it, but there's definitely nothing funny about this. Especially since Zahra's expression wasn't the one of someone that's joking, she looked almost angry at us for "complaining"

They're communicating telepathically because they're both on the spectrum 🤭

oooOOOOooooh! Someone is jealous!! I didn't expect him to say something about it (Thomas was the one that found her in the mirror maze with Jason) but I'm actually so glad, I didn't know I needed this until I got it... I also love how she's low-key teasing him about it "I'm sure he would've been happy to do it..." HEHEHE

HER AWKWARD SMILE MADE ME LAUGH SO MUCH I literally had to stop for a second just to laugh at this,, It was so silly and fun,,

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I felt a little bad for Petronilla during the visit, at first I thought it was hilarious but then OF COURSE Jason had to be a b*tch about it!! Maybe it was his way to get "revenge" about her teasing earlier... Also, stupid for both me and her to think that he'd behave 😭😭🙏🏻 I should've seen it coming,, And yeah, if I were in her position I'd react the same way, even if I didn't experience what she experienced with Ioan.

All that made up stuff, if not cleared up, could damage someone's reputation so much! Low-key disgusting behavior on his part, but since he felt genuinely sorry and tried ro console her (after being a dick...) It made up for the suffering 🥲👍🏻

So far, imI enjoyed this episode and how chaotic it was, I kinda feel bad for Petronilla since being with Jason is nice in a way but sooo stressful in another, but I've been enjoying every bit of his route so far, I love his more gentle and caring moments, and I can't wait to see what's coming next! I hope they keep the sweetness of it and don't turn him into some kind of bdsm king or something because that would 100% ruin it all for me, I'd seriously start a history replay and maybe switch to Thomas's or Amanda's routes😭🙏🏻

THE SCENE WAS EVERYTHING I fear I can't stop winning in New Gen, first Jason mendal omg, second the story being PERFECT for my oc and so far it's even better than I could even imagine... THEN I GET A CHANCE TO GET STUPID PACK THAT'S BEEN ON MY MIND EVER SINCE I FIRST SAW IT??

Only thing I'm missing is a change in the Style contests to make it more fair for everyone AND THEN THAT'S IT, THEY TAILORED THIS GAME FOR MEEEEEE (I'm just being silly but it's all coming together so nicely that I literally love everything about new gen and it keeps getting better and better...)

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This ^^^ whole part bellow the Illustration I wrote right after the episode as I was laying down the screenshots to prepare the review... And now Beemoov has confirmed that they're reworking the voting system... I may be something's harbinger after all... Everyone ask me anything, apparently I'm the true fortune teller/jk

The last bit "it's getting better and better" might've aged horribly seeing what others think about episode 8 but I'll have to see for myself 😭👍🏻

I think I've wrote less than usual once again, but I'll blame it on time passing and me forgetting 🥲 I'm also currently dying my hair so I might be a little distracted,,

I don't have anything else to add, so thank you for reading! See you soon with another review, that I'll try to have ready in time and not after months,,