#wake up > see us news > back to playing dragon age

[noah-kuttler]

[munson-blurbs]

Chapter 2: Don't Know What You've Got Till it's Gone

Collaboration with the Dustin to my Suzie, @corroded-hellfire 💚

Series Summary: Based on the Jonas Brothers song of the same name. You and Eddie share a hospital room in the wake of Hawkins' turmoil, striking up an unlikely friendship that could lead to much more.

Chapter Summary: You and Eddie are getting closer, and his friends can't help but notice something between you two. But when you receive devastating news, the pressure of being his upbeat, optimistic Sunshine becomes too much to handle.

Warnings: eventual smut (18+ only, minors DNI!), Eddie survives the Upside Down, hospital, mentions of surgery, description of Eddie's scars, controlled use of pain medication, angst

WC: 6.6k

Divider credit to @firefly-graphics

“Yeah, well, next time I tell you not to be a hero, you’d better listen to me.” A man’s voice stirs you from your sleep. You gently roll over onto your side and see fuzzy shadows behind the curtain that separates you and Eddie. 

“Hold on, Harrington,” Eddie pushes himself up slightly, an edge to his voice. “What do you mean by next time?”

“He’s still out there,” a younger voice pipes up. “We wounded him, but—” He stops abruptly, turning his stocky frame towards the curtain. “Hey, can your roommate hear us?”

“She can!” you chirp, and utterances of shit and shut up fill the room. “Don’t worry; I won’t tell anyone about your nerdy D&D secrets.” Eddie had spent the better part of the last few days explaining the ins and outs of the game, taking far too much pride in his Dungeon Master status for a man pushing 20. 

“Good morning, Sunshine,” Eddie calls out. “You decent? Want you to meet my friends.” 

“Sorry, did we wake you?” A girl asks, but your view of her is obstructed by the curtain. “We have a tendency to be a little…”

“Loud?” The older of the guys offers. “Obnoxious? Grating?”

The boy shrugs. “That’s just the way we roll, man.”

“What do you mean ‘we?’” The first guy retorts.

“I’m all good, Eddie,” you say. Now that you’ve given the all clear, the older boy tugs back the curtain. You recognize him as Steve Harrington, who graduated with you last year. 

“Steve,” he says, sticking out his hand for you to shake. “And, FYI, I do not play Dungeons & Dragons.”

You can’t help but let out a snort of laughter as you shake his hand and introduce yourself. “A shame. Eddie makes it seem like such fun.” At your sarcastic tone, Eddie flips you off, but you ignore him and continue. “We, uh, actually graduated together.”

“Yeah?” Steve asks, eyebrows shooting up so high they almost blend into his perfectly coiffed hair. “Huh. You think I’d remember that.” 

“I mean, it’s understandable you’d forget,” you say with a shrug. “You had just lost the last basketball game of the season.”

“Ouch,” Steve says, holding a hand over his heart. “But that doesn’t excuse the four years we were in the same class.”

Wincing, you give Steve another shrug. “More like seven. We went to middle school together, too.”

“Well, shit,” Steve says, running a hand over his face. “Yeah, I was a douchebag.”

“Was?” a feminine voice chimes in. Steve rolls his eyes and turns to the side to reveal the younger guy and a girl your age that are sitting next to Eddie’s bed.

“Robin, right?” you ask. She perks up in her seat, seeming pleasantly surprised that you know her name. 

“Yeah,” she says.

“You’re in band, right? I’m friends with Vickie, and I know she’s mentioned you a few times,” you explain.

“R-Really?” Robin asks, eyes widening.

“Mhmm,” you hum in confirmation, watching an unmistakable grin grow from cheek to cheek. You’ll have to follow up on that another time if you have a moment alone with her. “And you are…?” you start, turning towards the curly haired boy hoisting himself up on crutches, braces adorning his teeth. 

“Dustin Henderson,” he affirms. “Artificer: Master Inventor and future Hawkins High valedictorian.” You shake his hand, giggling as the three older friends roll their eyes in unison at his introduction. 

“Don’t forget ladies’ man,” Robin taunts, and Dustin hoists up two middle fingers in response, fumbling to keep the crutches secured under his arms. 

“Sunshine here is a ballet dancer,” Eddie says, trying to steer the conversation away from the topic of love. You watch as Steve and Robin exchange an amused glance, with the former mouthing Sunshine and the latter just shrugging. “She does, um, pointe?” He looks at you hopefully. 

You nod. “Yup! I’ll be right back at it as soon as this bad boy heals up.” You gently pat your leg, grimacing as even the lightest touch sends sharp pains down to your toes. 

You talk with the group for a few more minutes, swapping gossip about people from your graduating class, until Mandy knocks on the door. “It’s time for your appointment with the surgeon,” she says politely. 

“Surgeon?” Eddie asks, brows crinkling in confusion. 

“Y-Yeah,” you stammer, leaning on the nurse as you maneuver into the wheelchair. “Just, um, protocol with this kind of injury. Make sure everything’s good and all that.” He seems to buy this answer, and you breathe a silent sigh of relief. “It was nice talking with you all!” 

Once you’re out of the room, Dustin turns to Eddie. “So,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows. “Sunshine?”

“Shut up, Henderson,” Eddie grumbles, throwing a pillow at the boy. 

“Yeah, be nice to him,” Robin teases. “That nurse just took his sunshine away!”

“So, are you involved with this sunshine?” Steve asks, an amused expression written all across his face.

“No, not like that,” Eddie says, suddenly finding the hem of his scratchy blanket fascinating. “Just friends.” 

“You guys get along well,” Robin says, more statement than a question.

“Yeah,” Eddie agrees.

“And she’s beautiful, yeah?” Robin asks, raising her eyebrows at Eddie.

“Well, yeah,” Eddie says.

“So, what seems to be the problem?” she asks.

Eddie groans, dropping his head back against his pillow. Never mind the fact that Steve “ladies man” Harrington–an actual ladies’ man, not like Henderson–is in the room, but Eddie’s never been particularly comfortable talking about his experience—or rather lack thereof—with girls. There’s also the fact that he was literally attacked by bats from an alternate dimension, barely escaping hell with his life intact. And you’re so bright and sunny and the total opposite of what Eddie brings to the table. 

“It’s just that she… I mean, I… you see, we—.”

“Oh, cut the bullshit, Munson. Stop playing games. We all see the spark,” Steve says, crossing his arms over his chest indignantly. 

“There’s a spark?” Eddie asks quietly, lifting his head from the pillow and infinitesimal amount. 

“I knew it!” Dustin exclaims loudly, earning an angry shush from someone passing through the hallway. “Look at the stupid grin on his face! Eddie wuvs his Sunshine!” He leans over to pinch Eddie’s cheek, but gets his hand slapped away. 

“I don’t love her!” Eddie hisses. “Now, if you idiots could stop bothering me about this, and we can talk about anything else.”

“Okay, we’ll stop,” Robin agrees, but the mischievous smirk on her face says otherwise, “when you look me in the eyes and can tell me you don’t have feelings for her.”

Eddie lays back down and pulls the covers up over his head. “Goodnight and goodbye,” he mutters, despite the fact that it’s only 10 AM.

Steve yanks the covers back down, laughing when he sees his new friend scowling. “Calm down, man,” he says, sitting down on the starchy blanket, careful not to bump into Eddie. “We’re just messing with you. We’ll behave now.” He shoots Dustin and Robin a warning look, and the two grumble their apologies.

“‘S fine,” Eddie mumbles. “I’m tired anyway, so…” He lets his gaze fall to the doorway. 

“Yeah, of course,” Robin says with a small smile. “We’ll visit soon.”

“Get well soon, buddy,” Dustin lowers his voice as quietly as he can—which isn’t saying much, given his normal volume. “The kids of the future are counting on more of your sadistic campaigns.”

As Eddie slips into a medicated slumber, he makes a silent prayer for sweet dreams. Your image appears in his mind, and he can’t deny the warmth it brings him. 

Shit, he thinks. Those morons were right. I have a thing for Sunshine. He hopes that he’ll dream of you now that he’s admitted his crush. 

No such luck. 

The skies are red and gray, strange bursts of some sort of lightning fill the air. Weird shrill squeals fill the dead air. Eddie’s body is full of pain, searing and bleeding wounds making it difficult to breathe. Quick gasps leave his lips, his hands clutching at the ripped shreds of his shirt.

“Eddie! Shit!” Dustin’s voice rings around Eddie. The shorter boy is somewhere in the distance, not too far. “Steve! SOS! SOS!”

Soon, two pairs of hands are on Eddie’s body, trying to help, but only making the pain worse. He tries to steal himself against it, but it’s no use. The tears come, hot and thick as they build up in his eyes. The fear, the desperation, the pain. It’s all too much. 

“Eddie?” 

It’s not Steve or Dustin’s voice that Eddie hears above it all. It’s yours. But what are you doing in this God awful place? It’s the very last place that Eddie wants you.

“Eddie!” 

The darkness in the sky fades, a subtle light beginning to shine through. Then, the next thing he knows, Eddie is blinking his eyes open in the bright hospital room, his face sticky with the trail of tears. He rubs at his eyes with the heels of his hands. Once his vision is cleared, he sees you being wheeled into the room in the wheelchair you were brought out in. Your face is pinched in concern and it takes Eddie a moment to realize you’re concerned for him.

“Can you wheel me over to Eddie’s bed instead? Thanks,” you say to the transporter, who does as you request. Eddie scoots over and pulls down his blankets, silently offering you the space next to him. Biting your lip, you look around as if you’re debating, before pushing yourself up onto your good leg and holding out your arms for balance. Immediately, Eddie reaches over and takes your hand so you can use him to steady yourself. Shooting him a grateful smile, you’re able to situate yourself on the edge of his bed.

The transporter looks like he doesn’t know if he should be allowing this or not, so he quickly puts his head down and leaves the room with the wheelchair. Eddie helps you get situated next to him before he pulls the blankets up over both of you. 

“Another bad dream?” you ask once you’re comfortable.

“Yeah,” Eddie sighs. 

“Was it as bad as the first time?”

“At first. But I heard you calling me a lot earlier this time. Got all nice and light again before I opened my eyes. How’d it go with the surgeon?” 

“Oh,” you say, averting your eyes. “Nothing special. Just going over X-rays and tests and stuff, ya know?” You clear your throat, anxious to have the subject changed. “You know when you’re getting out of here?”

“Not yet,” Eddie says, sinking back against his pillows.

“What’s the first thing you’re gonna do when you get out?” you ask.

“Honestly? Get a fucking cheeseburger. This hospital food is shit. I mean, come on. What a man gotta do to get something better than gray mashed potatoes and lime Jell-O?”

“Okay,” you say with a giggle. “After you get some good food, what are you gonna do?”

“I dunno,” Eddie says with a shrug. “Haven’t really thought about it.”

“Oh, come on,” you say. “What’s Eddie Munson’s big dream? Be a big rock star? World tours? Opening for Ozzy? No—Ozzy opening for you.”

Eddie scoffs, gently nudging your shoulder with his. “Before all…this…happened, I was thinking about moving to Indianapolis after graduation. Get involved in the music scene there.”

“Indianapolis?” You wrinkle your nose. “That’s honestly super boring. You survived an earthquake and you’re only gonna go to the state capital?”

“Fine,” he whines exaggeratedly, smiling as he does it. “How about…Australia? I can be, like, a kangaroo farmer.”

“Is that even a thing?”

“It is now.” His loose, tangled curls brush up against the part of your shoulder left exposed by the pale blue hospital gown. “What about you? New York City? Maybe dance on Broadway, or be one of those…Christmas, kicking girls?”

You snort out a laugh. “A Rockette?”

“Yeah.”

“Eh,” you shrug, pushing away the thoughts of the news you’d just received from the surgeon. “New York’s nice to visit, but I need someplace warm. I’m thinking of going to California.”

“Just don’t forget about me when you’re a big Hollywood star,” Eddie teases, though there’s a hint of seriousness in his voice. “And if the movie you’re dancing in needs a band, you know who to recommend.”

“Of course. But do you really think I could get Tears for Fears to play?” His shove is a bit harder this time, making both of you groan as you laugh. “Kidding, kidding. You know Corroded Coffin will be at the top of my list. If you’re not too busy with your own gigs.”

Never too busy for my Sunshine, Eddie nearly blurts out, but he says instead, “will do.” He’s silent for a bit before asking, “Why didn’t you go to California?”

“Huh?”

“Why are you going to college in Indiana and not California?” Eddie tries again. “I mean, you said it yourself: the entertainment scene is much better there than here.” He scrunches up his nose. “Actually, why are you even in college?”

You bark out a laugh at the bluntness of his question. “Um, because that’s what people do after high school?”

“You don’t have to, though,” he quips. “Think about it, Sunshine. College will always be there, but if you wanna pursue dance, you’ve gotta do it while you’re young and, uh, limber.” His cheeks blush a delicious shade of pink. 

“Yeah, well.” The truth comes tumbling out before you can stop it. “My parents didn’t think it was a good idea. Just dancing. They wanted me to go to get my degree; build a ‘solid foundation’ or whatever.” You trace invisible spirals into the blanket as you speak. “My dad told me that he could never tell his friends that I danced for a living, because they would, and I quote, ‘think that his daughter was a stripper with daddy issues.’”

Now it’s Eddie’s turn to laugh. “First of all, stripping is a noble profession, and I do not approve of any stripper slander in my home.”

“We’re not in your home,” you point out. 

“I do not approve of any stripper slander in my hospital room,” he amends, flicking your forehead with his thumb and middle finger. “And, second, do not tell me that you made a decision about your future based on the opinions of your dad’s old-ass friends.” He groans when you remain quiet. “Seriously?”

“I just didn’t want to upset them,” you mumble. “The only reason they allowed me to study dance is because I’m also majoring in education. I could be a dance teacher.”

“Do you wanna be a dance teacher?”

“Someday,” you admit. “I taught some classes at my studio for the little kids, and I really liked it.” You gnaw at your lower lip. 

“But?” Eddie presses, letting his thumb graze against yours. 

“But it’s not what I want to do now,” you relent. “Right now, I want to go on auditions and maybe get cast in a play or a cheesy music video or a goddamn commercial and…and dance.”

Eddie gives your hand a quick squeeze before pulling back, not wanting to cross a boundary when you’re so vulnerable. “Then you’re gonna dance,” he murmurs. “We’ll get outta here and move to Cali, and you’re gonna dance.”

A month ago, the prospect of dropping out of school to dance professionally would have you downright terrified. Terrified of failure, of your parents’ inevitable disappointment, of finding out you’re not good enough. But now it only fills you with regret, because that dream became impossible with just the shifting of some rogue tectonic plates. 

“Okay,” you say softly, once again wearing your hopeful façade. “Sounds like a plan.” A plan you’ll both easily forget once you’re back out in the real world, faced with the problems you’ve been shielded from within the hospital walls. 

The two of you lay there talking about your futures until sleep overtakes you both. Eddie’s the first to drift off; you stay awake for a bit, consumed by echoes of today’s appointment with Dr. Sanoj. What was supposed to be a brief meeting about scheduling your surgery turned into something much more devastating. You rest your head on Eddie’s chest, only allowing yourself to unravel when you hear his soft snores. The combination of the energy expended by crying and the drowsiness from your meds allows you to sleep, still hiccuping from tears as you fall into a dreamless slumber. 

Neither of you hear the soft click of crutches as Dustin hobbles back into the room. “Forgot my—son of a bitch, I knew it!” he whispers, slinging his left-behind jacket over his shoulder. “Steve and Robin are gonna lose their shit!”

The next morning, Mandy arrives with breakfast and medication. In front of each of you, she places a plate of runny scrambled eggs, fruit that is described as “fresh” but most certainly is not, and a small carton of orange juice. It’s strangely domestic, and you can’t help but imagine you and Eddie eating together in your shared home. You’re making pancakes or waffles or frittatas—anything better than the food in front of you. Eddie’s frying up bacon, wearing an apron that says Kiss the Chef, and you do, over and over and—

The rattle of your pill cup snaps you from your fantasy, and you dutifully swallow the pastel tablets with a swig of juice. 

Eddie grins when Mandy gives him his meds. “Hello, beautiful,” he croons, making grabby motions with his calloused hands. 

“Sorry to disappoint, Mr. Munson; no more painkillers in this batch,” Mandy says, laughing at his pout despite herself. “Dr. Franklin wants to speak with you; he’ll be making his rounds in a few minutes.”

“Oooh, Eddie’s in trooouble!” you sing-song, flashing a grin at him. 

Rolling his eyes at you, Eddie downs his pills and leans back against his pillow. “Would be used to it. Was in Higgin’s office enough.”

“Oh, Eddie,” you say with a sigh. “Did you go down to the cafeteria while I was asleep and make some big dramatic speech on one of the tables? At least tell me that someone videotaped it for me.”

“You’re hilarious,” he says, tossing his empty paper cup at you. The giggle you let out has his stomach feeling tingly, and he’s sure it’s not from the medications. 

There’s a knock on the open door to your room and an older man steps inside, a clipboard tucked under his arm. “Hey, Eddie. How are you feeling?”

“Better. Thanks, doc,” Eddie answers. “What’s the word?”

“Well, glad to say everything looks good. All lab results are normal and you’re healing up nicely. Of course, some injuries still have a ways to go, but there’s no reason you can’t be home for that.”

Eddie’s immediately thrilled. Finally, being able to get out of the hospital where he’s been poked and prodded and it’s impossible to get a good night’s sleep because of all the beeping equipment and nurses constantly checking on you. But as soon as the excitement came, it went. Because leaving the hospital also meant not spending most of the hours in the day by your side. No waking up to your laughter as he tells shitty jokes over your shitty breakfasts. No more saying, “I told you so” when Shelby confesses to the other twin, “I’m still in love with you” on your daily soap opera binges. No more constant sunshine.

“That’s great,” Eddie tells the doctor, his heart not behind the words. “When am I sprung?”

“Should be good to go tomorrow morning. I’m just gonna head back to my office, dot the i’s, cross the t’s, put my name on the X. You know, all that official mumbo jumbo. I’ll have Mandy get everything together. Your prescriptions, your discharge papers, and whatever else you’ll need.”

“Sounds good,” Eddie says, nails scratching at the blanket in his lap. 

“Any questions for me?” The doctor asks. When Eddie shakes his head, the doctor gives him a smile and pats Eddie’s leg. 

“Oh, I have one,” you say, raising your hand from where you’re tucked up in bed. “When is he cleared to shower? It’s like sharing a room with a donkey.”

The doctor lets out a small chuckle. “Eddie, you are officially cleared to take a shower. If you think of any questions, just tell Mandy. She’ll make sure I get the message.”

“Will do. Thanks.” Eddie nods his head at the man as he steps out of the room. Eddie turns his head to see you grinning at him. While it’s a beautiful sight, it now gives him a melancholy feeling. 

“You’re being freed!” you call. “You can go get that cheeseburger tomorrow!”

“Should I sneak one into you?” Eddie asks, his smirk not packing its usual punch. 

“Oh, please do,” you say. “God, I can practically taste it.”

“Or smell it? Like, how apparently you’re smelling me?” Eddie asks, raising an eyebrow. Part of him is a little embarrassed because the two of you were sitting so close together just last night. 

“You’re not that bad,” you tell him. “I probably smell vile.”

Not a chance, Eddie thinks. “All right, well, I guess I’ll go take a shower then.” He stands up from the bed and over to the small pile of clothes Wayne had brought him the other day. Just some old t-shirts and comfortable pajama pants to sleep in, but it was still nice to have a touch of home. 

Once Eddie has closed the bathroom door behind him, Mandy comes in to check your vitals. 

“Heard the good news,” she says as she reads the numbers of your blood pressure. “Gonna be weird having a room to yourself? You guys have been inseparable.”

Your face heats at her words and you look down at your lap as she scribbles something into your chart. “S’fine,” you say with a shrug. Mandy looks down at you, a knowing smile on her lips. 

“Uh huh,” she says as she clicks her pen. “Well, all your numbers are good. They stay this way, you’ll be headed to the operating room before you know it. Need anything?”

“No,” you say, downcast eyes on your blanket. 

A bang from the en suite bathroom has both you and Mandy craning your heads in that direction.

“I’m good!” Eddie shouts. “Just dropped the shampoo!”

It makes you chuckle and Mandy shakes her head, fondly. You think she’s going to miss him, too. 

“I’ll see you soon, I’m sure,” you say to Mandy as she heads out the door. Sighing to yourself, you cuddle up in your blankets and decide to have a five minute pity party. Not only are you facing multiple surgeries over the foreseeable future, but Eddie won’t be here by your side to keep your spirits up. Sure, maybe he calls you his sunshine, but you’re positive he isn’t aware of how much he brightens your days too. The water turns off in the bathroom and you quickly wipe your hands over your cheeks, trying to catch any pesky tears that may have slipped free. 

The curtain in the middle of the room is opened—it’s only ever closed anymore if a doctor or nurse needs it to be for some reason. It allows you to see the bathroom door open, but before you see him, you can hear Eddie mumbling to himself.

“Man knows how to do laundry. What the hell is this? A fucking toddler shirt?” When you finally see him, your breath is caught in your chest—for two reasons. One, the teenage girl in you can’t help but respond this way to seeing the guy you have a crush on without his shirt. Two, you’d never really heard the whole story of why Eddie had to come to the hospital, and seeing the puckered and pulled flesh of his chest makes your heart ache. There’s bruising leaving purple and brown spots on top of red and pink gashes that are healing. It looks painful and searing against his otherwise pale white skin. 

You know better than to stare. Obviously he’d assume you’re just staring at the scars, not admiring the small but sculpted muscles beneath them. It takes a Herculean effort to pull your gaze from his body and look down in your lap.

“Shit,” Eddie mumbles as he stomps over to his pile of clothes. He rummages through them until he finds another shirt. He’s quick in slipping it on, then turns towards your bed. Taking the few steps over in your direction, he sits down on the bottom corner of your bed. When you look up, there’s half a smile on his face as he plays with a small white cloth in his hands. “Believe it or not, this used to be a shirt that fit me.” He holds the cloth up and you see it’s a Guns N’ Roses shirt that’s been shrunk until only a child could fit into it. “My uncle must’ve shrunk it. Guess that’s payback for all the times I turned his white shirts pink because I left a pair of red boxers in the washer.”

“Led Zeppelin is better anyway,” you say, gesturing to the shirt he’s currently wearing. 

“So, uh,” Eddie says, looking down at his lap and fidgeting with the too-small tee. “You saw the scars, huh?”

“I did,” you say in a quiet voice. His cheeks turn red and it breaks your heart. “No, please don’t be embarrassed, Eddie. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

He opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Shutting it again, Eddie shakes his head. “I, um… they just. They’re—what I mean…”

“Eddie, take a breath. It’s okay.” You go to reach for his hand, but you can’t bend enough due to your injured leg. Eddie shifts so he’s facing you and leans the rest of the way so you can take his hand. “There’s no scar you could have that would make me think any less of you. Plus, you haven’t seen my leg. It looks pretty gnarly.”

“Gnarly?” Eddie asks, looking up at you underneath his eyelashes, the tiniest smile on his lips. 

“Yeah, I’m preparing for that California life,” you tease him. “Gotta fit in with the surfer dudes.”

Eddie laughs, shaking his head. “As soon as you get the OK, I’m booking our tickets.” He shoves the pillow out of the way and sits on top of the blanket. “I can’t afford first-class, so coach will have to do.”

“Lucky for you, I’m not a diva—yet,” you add, excited to play along with the fantasy game he has going on. “I can handle a few hours with the common folk.”

“And we thank you for gracing us with your presence.” Eddie’s eyes flit back to your leg. “When do you think you’ll be good to go?”

Dr. Sanoj told you that between surgeries and recovery, it’ll be at least six weeks, but you bite back that information. “Any day now,” you lie. “Just waiting on those discharge papers. But you know how that can be, with all the sign offs. Everyone’s gotta cross their t’s and dot their i’s.” Good God, shut up, you think. 

“Cool,” Eddie nods. He looks deep in thought, tongue poking out in concentration. “Yeah, all right. I can make it work.”

You smile, rolling your eyes playfully at his commitment to the bit. Your pain meds start to kick in, and you drift off into a hazy sleep. 

While you’re passed out, there’s a soft knock on the door. 

“Oh, she’s asleep,” Eddie hears a woman’s voice softly murmur. There’s a slight creak as she sits in the chair next to your bed. “My sweet girl. Mom’s here.”

Your mom. Eddie uses his elbows to push himself up, pulling the curtain back a few inches. 

“Um, hi,” he says, not realizing how nervous he is until he actually starts talking. “Are you Sunshine’s mom?”

The woman’s brow crinkles. “Sunshine?”

Eddie’s cheeks tinge pink. “Yeah, I, uh, I call her Sunshine,” he stammers, nodding in your direction. 

“Then, yes, I’m Sunshine’s mom.”

“She, um, she’s—I call her Sunshine because she brightens up my day. Probably the only person in this building who doesn’t hate my guts, let alone like me.” He wants to stop talking, but he can’t. “I have these nightmares, y’know? From the, uh, earthquake thing. And she always pulls me outta them. I don’t know what I’m gonna do when I go home tomorrow.”

Your mom gives Eddie a sympathetic smile, gently stroking your hand, minding the needle poking into it. “Well, she’s always telling me how much you make her laugh. Lord knows she could use some happiness in her life.” She sighs. “I just hope her new roommate is as kind as you.”

“At least she’s getting outta here soon,” Eddie offers, “so even if she has a shi—bad roommate, it won’t be for long.”

“Six weeks isn’t exactly ‘soon,’” your mom says. Her gaze doesn’t leave your face, so peaceful in your sleep. 

“Wait, six weeks?” Eddie nearly chokes on his own tongue in surprise. “No, she told me that the doctor should clear her in the next coupla days.”

Your mom shakes her head. “She’s got three surgeries to fix that broken femur, plus recovery time. The reason it’s only six weeks is because she’s young and healthy.”

Eddie feels like he’s been punched in the stomach. Why would you lie to him? Get him pumped up about the prospect of moving to California, living out your dreams together, for it to all be bullshit?

Tears prick at his eyes. Maybe this was all just a joke, a stupid prank on your part. Make the Freak think that someone actually cared about him, laughing behind his back the whole time. 

Maybe it’s best that he’s leaving tomorrow. Then he won’t have to listen to you drag him along for your own sick entertainment. 

You wake up around dinnertime, stretching your limbs as much as your limited mobility allows. It’s a far cry from your usual limber exercises, but it’s enough to get the blood flowing through your body. 

An episode of Wheel of Fortune plays from the TV in the corner, but it’s blocked by the curtain. Eddie probably closed it while I slept, you think. That’s pretty much the only time you two keep the room divided; every now and then, you forget and wake up to the sight of Eddie Munson sleeping next to you. 

“Eds? You awake?”

“Yup,” is his terse reply, with no enthusiasm behind it. 

You open the curtain with a grin. “Are you grumpy because your novelas aren’t on?”

“Nope.” He keeps his arms crossed over his chest, left ankle draped over his right. 

“What’s wrong?” you ask, frowning. “Did something happen while I was sleeping?”

“Yeah, actually.” Eddie finally allows his gaze to meet yours. His usual friendly doe eyes are clouded with anger. “Your mom stopped by.”

Your eyebrows pinch together in confusion. “Did she say something that upset you? I told her that all the murderer stuff wasn’t true, and she believed me—believed you.”

“Actually, we talked a bit about you.” The acid in his tone is enough to burn.

“What about me?” you ask, only becoming further confused by this conversation. 

Eddie huffs out a humorless chuckle and licks his tongue across his teeth. “Really thought you had me, didn’t you? Think you could pretend to be all buddy buddy with me just to mess with me? Get in my head?”

“What? Who’s in your head?” Part of you wonders if this is all some medicine-induced stress dream. “Eddie.” You push yourself up as best you can, leg aching and body suffering from general soreness from being cramped in the bed for so long. “What are you talking about? What did my mom say to you?”

This time when his eyes cut to you, there’s more than anger there. There’s fury, pain. The sight makes your heart ache, and the fact that this look is directed at you is making your head spin. 

“Just a couple of days, huh?” Eddie pushes himself to the edge of his bed so his legs hang off the side. His glare burns your skin and you feel yourself wanting to shrink down and out of sight. “That’s how long til the doctor will clear ya?”

Part of the puzzle of why Eddie was mad was starting to kick into place. Shit, you think. Mom must’ve said something about the surgeries. 

“Eddie, I—.”

“Lied? Yeah, you did. But what’s that matter when you’re lying to The Freak?”

Guilt gives way to anger in your gut as he throws this accusation at you. Not once, whether in high school with him or after, did you think of Eddie as a freak. You’ve never agreed with those who called him names and treated him as lesser than. 

“I didn’t lie to you because I think you're a freak, Eddie.” It comes out strangled between all the emotions vying to be expressed through your voice. 

“You sure about that?” Eddie narrows his eyes at you, and it’s hard to see a trace of the laughing and smiling Eddie you’ve become so close with. 

“Yes, I’m sure,” you grit out. “I lied becau—.”

“Well, what possible other motive could there have been?” Eddie questions. His hands are gripping the sheets beneath him, his knuckles turning almost as white as the linens. 

“If you would just listen to me!”

“So you can lie some more?” Eddie scoffs and shakes his head. “Well, screw California.”

Confusion is suddenly back in your mixture of emotions. California? Why bring up that joke now? Unless…

“Wait,” you say, holding up a hand. “You were actually serious about going to California?”

“What?” he practically barks out. “You weren’t?”

“Eddie, I thought that was a joke,” you say with a disbelieving laugh. “Some made up fantasy to get us through spending all our time in these four plain-as-fuck walls.”

“Of course you weren’t really going to do that with me,” Eddie says, a sneer curling his lip. 

“Because I didn’t know it was real!” you try to explain.

Eddie throws up his arms, grimacing as it tugs on his stitches. “Why wouldn’t it be real? Is me having a future that unbelievable?”

“What the hell are you on?” you hiss. “Eddie, you need to finish high school. And I need to get my bachelor’s degree. We can’t just be fucking off to California like it’s no big deal!”

Eddie bites his thumbnail before responding. “Let me get this straight. We narrowly escape death during this…earthquake…and you wanna just go back to our normal lives? Like we weren’t given a second chance to live?” He’s pacing around the room now. “My neighbor? Max Mayfield? Harrington told me that she’s blind now. She’s fucking blind and in a full body cast!”

“I’m sorry,” you say quietly, but he continues frantically walking back and forth without acknowledging you. 

“And Jason Carver. Jason fucking Carver! I hated that son of a bitch, and now he’s dead. All those times he was a piece of shit to me and I wished something would happen to him, and now it did.”

“That’s not your fault,” you try. “You didn’t cause the earthquake.”

Eddie shakes his head. “That’s all I thought about: death and sadness. And then I met you.” His eyes are shiny with tears. “Someone who liked spending time with me, who believed in me, who had these crazy dreams just like I did. A…a friend.” He wipes at his face clumsily, embarrassed to be crying. “But you’re just like the rest of them, huh?”

“That’s not fair—”

“Y’know what’s real fuckin’ funny?” Eddie smacks his hand on his bedside table. “The other day, Harrington said that we—you and I—had some kinda ‘spark’ between us.” He scoffs, rolling his eyes. “Guess he’s just as full of shit as you are, Sunshine.” When he says the nickname now, it’s full of venom; there’s no trace of the sweet, goofy guy you’ve gotten to know. 

“Eddie, if you would just let me—” But yet again, Eddie doesn’t let you attempt to explain any of the situation. The fact that a part of you somewhere deep inside is fluttery because Steve saw a spark between you and Eddie is something you have to put away to examine at a better time. 

“Good luck with your surgery,” Eddie says. “Too bad the doctors can’t cure bitch.”

It feels like a punch to the gut, the air being knocked out of you. Your mouth opens and your lips move, but no sound comes out. There’s a crack in your heart, but it quickly feels like it’s been soldered closed with the anger bubbling up inside of you. Your lungs reinflate, the blood pumps heavily through your veins, and your fists clench where they rest in your lap. The urge to lash out is strong. And at this moment, you’re so very weak.

“You know what, Eddie? Fuck you. And hey, good luck getting to California with those murder charges on your record.” The moment the words tumble out of your mouth you wish you could take them back. Eddie stepped over the line, but you ran right past him. “Shit, I didn’t—.”

Suddenly you’re not looking at Eddie anymore. He’s pulled the curtain closed, the last glimpse you get of him is a raging fury in his eyes. And you can hardly blame him. The only thing that stares back at you is the gauzy white curtain still swaying from the forceful yank. 

“Eddie…” The television volume gets turned up to an ungodly volume, making you cover your ears and impossible to have a conversation over. 

You spend the rest of the night with your ear pressed to the pillow in an attempt to drown out the baseball game he’s watching. Given his penchant for yelling about the absurdity of sports, you doubt he’s even paying attention to it, but the broadcasters’ monologues about fastballs and strikes curtails any attempt to speak to him. You barely touch your dinner, and Mandy tuts at you worriedly, but you insist you feel fine. 

In reality, you feel nauseated. You said a horrible thing to a wonderful person, and you really hurt his feelings. 

Maybe we can talk it through in the morning, you think, trying not to get your hopes up. Maybe we can apologize and move on. 

When you wake up the next morning, his bed has been slept in, left unmade while he’s probably in the bathroom. The curtain is pulled back; an excellent sign that he’s ready to hear your apology, and possibly forgive you. As soon as he comes back, you’ll give it a shot. 

“Gonna be quiet around here for a bit without your buddy, huh?” Mandy says from the doorway. She walks over to Eddie’s bed and starts stripping the sheets. “You get to say goodbye?”

“Not yet,” you admit. “I’ll have to catch him before he leaves.”

Mandy’s brows furrow in confusion. “Honey, his uncle came and got him an hour ago.” She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. “He didn’t tell you?”

All you can do is shake your head.

“Probably didn’t wanna wake you. I’m sure he’ll stop by and visit.” Mandy curls the sheets into a ball and tucks them under her arm. “I’ll be back with breakfast and meds.”

As soon as she’s gone, you burst into tears. Eddie left without saying goodbye. He left thinking you don’t care about him or believe in him. He left without his Sunshine.

--

taglist: @thebrookemunson, @mystars123, @h-ness1944, @hazydespair, @ajkamins, @aysheashea, @jasminelafleur, @brittney69, @arsonfrogger, @brassreign, @lunarzstarz, @aftermidnightwriting, @justtryingtobecreative, @micheledawn1975, @kailynn-exe

[myx-on-earth]

Content Warning: Landfall Game's April Fools Triumph

For the Content!

It would seem that an April Fools joke of a game has resulted in overnight indie success. Landfall Games, a beloved indie game studio, has a yearly April Fools tradition they call “Landfall Day”, where their devs put together essentially a parody of whatever game is popular at the time. They’ve parodied everything from DayZ to battle royales (Twice, with Totally Accurate Battlegrounds and Knightfall), and this year it would seem it’s Lethal Company’s turn.

Lethal Company is a game known for silly co-op shenanigans that seem to instantly translate into YouTube content- and Content Warning takes that idea and turns it up to 11, making being an influencer a part of the game mechanics. You and a group of friends take a diving bell to “The Old World”, a spooky map filled with monsters and traps entirely for the sake of internet entertainment value. With a single camera and 90 seconds of film, your group has to make the spookiest, funniest video possible- because your only source of income is Spooktube, and that revenue doesn’t come easily.

It's such a brilliant parody of both the horror genre Lethal Company tapped into and the loop of content creation in the internet age that it, somehow, wraps around to being an excellent game in of itself, though Landfall is no stranger to finding gold through satire. Previously, their first battle royale parody (Totally Accurate Battlegrounds, a riff on PUBG) found some success, enough that Landfall turned it into a full venture. It’s not as popular nowadays, but it IS legitimately good- and Content Warning seems to be turning out the same way with its initial popularity and engaging premise.

Typical Content Warning video result, featuring myself, @thatpocketninja, @squiddskipp, and a third friend who requested to remain anonymous

In the space of video game development, April Fools seems to be not so much a “joke” day, but a day that allows ideas to be thrown around that might not otherwise have been considered, which can lead to majorly creative leaps of faith. With examples like the Yakuza series’ pivot to turn-based combat, Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon’s continued success in the midst of a floundering Ubisoft, and even Lilith Walther’s upcoming definitely-not-Bloodborne Kart (now known as Nightmare Kart), the idea of “joke turned legitimate gamedev venture” isn’t exactly new.

I actually had the pleasure of exchanging emails with Hanna Fogelberg (@thebirdmountain on Twitter), Landfall's Head of Community, who provided some insight into Content Warning’s development and the overwhelming response in the interview below.

1. What's it like to go to bed seeing some success, then waking up to find your joke game is a viral hit? Did you expect this at all, given the surprising amount of polish it has?

"We couldn't sleep to tell you the truth! Even if the team said good night at about 2am we kept texting the player numbers to each other throughout the night, we were very wired! We always knew there was the potential of the game going really well, there's something about the design and shareability of the videos you make that we knew could hit it big but it's still surprising it went THIS well."

2. How long did it take to develop Content Warning?

"Content Warning was made in about six weeks of active game development, but the idea came to us back in December!"

3. What were your main inspirations for the game? (Beyond Lethal Company, of course)

“Lethal Company and similar games were an obvious reference for the gameplay loop, we love that game! That said, what was most interesting to us was the core of the game - the filming and video creation. We were inspired by YouTubers and influencer culture, there's something interesting in people risking life and limb for content that we wanted to play off of. 

Other than that, the vibes of The Older World were inspired by Junji Ito and a specific H.R Giger painting while The Over World references the Swedish children's book Pettson och Findus.”

4. How experienced was the dev team?

“We're pretty experienced, the Landfall team has been making games for over 10 years with previous releases being Totally Accurate Battle Simulator, Stick Fight: The Game, Clustertruck and Rounds to mention a few.”

5. How does this experience compare to the last semi-viral success Landfall had with a Landfall Day game? (TABG)

“This game outdid TABG in player numbers several times over! So it's hard to compare, this is by far our most viral hit to date.” 6. Any plans for the future of the game? Or just basic bug fixes and some more content? 

“We will see! Currently, we're focusing on fixing bigger bugs and other issues but we already have some new content planned. We're kind of playing it by ear at this point, it all depends on how things go in the coming weeks.”

Some may attribute Content Warning’s success to multiple factors- the 24 hour free period, how it riffs on Lethal Company and the tropes it already employs, or even that it was “designed to go viral”- but you can’t deny that, even as an iterative piece, it still manages to find its own identity and already seems to have captured the content creation hearts of everyone who gives it a chance. Games like this, that aren’t reliant on micro transactions and are buoyed by the PEOPLE you play with, rather than the money that one must spend on it, are the hope- and, hopefully, the future- of the video games industry. You can find Content Warning (No longer free, but still very cheap!) at the link below: https://store.steampowered.com/app/2881650/Content_Warning/

[blacklegsanjiii]

please i need more parental figure ivankov in my life PLEASE-

no pressure obv what you have is already wonderful ^^ but i am so invested in this sanji who is head of espionage, which is very fitting for someone who was supposed to be stealth black. recruits are introduced to a blonde teen who smokes too much and wears absolutely fabulous dresses and heels and think koala is hazing them when she says hes their top infiltrator. sanji takes great joy in sneaking up to them at the most inopportune times and blackmailing them with eavesdropped secrets. he and sabo and koala were all very much troublesome gremlins as much as they were respected revolutionaries

how was sanji's childhood here? raised on kamabakka, much more healthy embracement of gender and sexuality, learning all the secret recipes, taught how to cook and sky-walk and apply impeccable makeup by an array of okama aunts and uncles. he sometimes brings up stories about his growing up to the crew and everyone thinks hes just making up stories. meeting ivankov makes so much sense to them.

Sanji picked up fresh out of the dungeon and is being cared for in Kamabakka. All the Aunties and Uncles take turns dressing up and putting Sanji's make up on him. Everyone notices that this kid is so good at hiding and listening to everyone that Dragon and Iva want him trained in espionage in case he decides to join the army. When Dragon brings Sabo, Sanji is constantly sneaking in with Koala to see the new kid in the infirmary.

When Sabo wakes up and is freaked out Sanji and Koala are the ones who stay and comfort Sabo as Dragon explains what happened and where he is. Sanji keeps visiting even though he's supposed to be sleeping and Dragon finds him on more than one occasion talking to Sabo late in the night and sighing.

"Sanji, please, if Iva gets angry about taking you back to Momoiro when you're exhausted I'll never hear the end of it. Quit hiding yourself and go to bed." Dragon explains and Sanji, dressed in a pink dress and ballet slipper type shoes, pouts and blots out of the room silently. Sabo is amazed every time.

Time goes on and Sabo and Koala's favorite past times is introducing new recruits who are double or triple their age, marine defects, high ranking former government/kingdom officials to Sanji who genderfucks. They don't believe this blond kid is going to become head of espionage nor the other the CoS so they laugh at these kids. And like later in the week Sanji will drop why they left whatever and if it's severe enough Dragon or Iva or in the olden days before becoming a Warlord: Kuma will come relieve them of duty, so to speak. Sanji who goes through three packs of cigarettes a day, cooks attack cuisine and just cooks amazing food and can set his legs on fire and sky walk like Cipher Pol. Best blackmailer in the Revolutionary Army, even has shit on Dragon. Mainly being he knows Dragon has a son.

Sanji has been to several REVERIES where his family have attended but with his make up skills and the dress he's wearing? No one recognizes him. He gets the best and most important information. So when he goes to Baratie to work he uses these skills to fuck with everyone coming come through.

Whenever Nami tries to blackmail Sanji tries for whatever reason he just smiles because she doesn't have anything substantial, nothing that would harm the Army. If she goes too far when he's doing her make up at some point he just drops her deepest insecurity he knows about her and smiles and says "don't play games, Nami. You won't win against me." He even has dirt on Robin no one knows he has.

He still fully expresses his gender his identity still and Zoro is confused but Luffy doesn't care because that's his cook. No one really understands why Sanji is just like that until they're on Momoiro with Sabo and Koala and Iva and Dragon. Iva tells stories of Sabo, Koala, and Sanji getting into trouble or just mayhem. The first time Sanji sky walked around Baltigo, when Sabo first laced his pipe with haki and accidentally put someone in the infirmary. Koala talks about her long suffering watching and taking care of Sabo and Sanji where they don't even try to argue because she has the pipe.

They don't know when she got it but she has it.

Sanji tells stories of just sneaking into official meetings and just waves dropping in the halls of multiple bases. The Reveries he's been to as "security" and Sabo mentions that one time when they were like 15/16 and they went on their first mission alone. Dragon, who was off dealing with something comes in and sees Luffy and them are still here and Sabo telling them and he tries to conqueror's haki Sabo who withstands it thanks to his training, Sabo keeps telling them while giving Dragon a shit eating grin about the major marine base they exploded. And the subsequent escape with Sanji's sky walking, Koala's guidance, and Sabo holding onto all the important documents.

"HOW DID YOU EVEN GET IN???" Nami yells.

"Sometimes I go the extra mile to be pretty. And a lot of men can't resist a leggy woman." Sanji nods and Iva sighs.

"I regret letting you learn so young." They bemoan.

"You're all on desk duty for the foreseeable future." Dragon growls.

"Nah." They all respond.

[darielivalyen]

When the gate opens, love and beauty will return to the world, and we will once again live in his perfect light. He's been gone for a long time, but his return is upon us. Let us praise his name and rejoice!

The Elder Crystals is a fantasy game set in the world of Sekherion, and its story begins in a place known as the Secluded Valley. The valley has been your home for nineteen years, and you have always seen it as a safe place.

All of that changes when you wake up in a forsaken cavern, right next to a large Crystal Gate, and you realize you were kidnapped and left for dead. Thankfully, you're not alone. There's a black cat with you, and he/she seems to be trying to lead you to safety.

As you explore the cavern, you uncover traces of suspicious activity. There are books and scrolls dating back to the Second Age, there are notes speaking of strange, dark rituals, and then, there is the Crystal Gate itself. You've never seen anything like it in the valley, and you can't help but wonder why it's there.

Is the Crystal Gate keeping you from what's inside, or is it keeping whatever's inside from getting out?

Play as male, female, or nonbinary.

Play as a member of one of eight races, with each one having a unique racial trait.

Customize your appearance, personality, and sexual orientation.

Romance a wizard astronomer, a dutiful monk, a quirky witch, a noble archer, a mysterious mercenary, or an arrogant elf from the outside world.

Build your stats and develop your skills, and see how your choices change your experience.

Choose your weapon and collect different types of equipment.

Explore three different types of magic.

Customize your dragon familiar.

Complete quests and track them in your personal journal.

Collect books to unlock a unique scene at the end of the game.

Protect your town from bandits, cultists, and the undead.

Join forces with an old wizard, an ancient lich, or a talking tree.

Learn the truth about your mother and her unusual connection to the Elder Crystals, and discover what happened when the valley was cut off from the outside world!

THE ASTRONOMER

Amedu (m) or Ameda (f) | Islander, human | 19yo | Wizard

Trope: MC's childhood friend.

Personality: relaxed, open-minded, esoteric, calm.

PINTEREST | BLURB

THE MONK

Nelfas (m) or Nelfasu (f) | Saryel/Southerner, human | 22yo | Monk

Trope: Voice of reason.

Personality: calm, detached, rational, unemotional, wise.

PINTEREST | BLURB

THE NOBLE ARCHER

Darion (m) or Daria (f) | Southerner, human | 20yo | Archer

Trope: Arranged engagement.

Personality: sarcastic, rebellious, cunning, evasive, cocky, loud.

PINTEREST | BLURB

THE WITCHLING

Cerien (m) or Cerina (f) | Northerner, human | 18yo | Witch

Trope: That strange person no one knows anything about. Someone with a secret crush.

Personality: obsessive, quirky, individualistic, unorthodox, shy.

PINTEREST | BLURB

THE MERCENARY

Xarien (m) or Xarina (f) | Northerner, human | 25yo | Battlemage

Trope: New person in town. Someone with a lot of inner demons.

Personality: deceitful, cunning, daring, jealous, ruthless.

PINTEREST | BLURB

THE GUARDIAN*

Qen (m) | Primeval Elf | 5506yo | Guardian/Holy Warrior

Trope: Someone with a connection to MC's family.

Personality: dutiful, arrogant, lawful, tactful, lonely.

PINTEREST | BLURB

*Unlike the other five love interests, Qen's gender is set to male, and he can only be romanced by male characters.

Art credits: Izabela Oliwia.

FORUM | DEMO | TUMBLR | PINTEREST | PATREON

[fungifanart]

Once upon a time, in a land far-far away, there lived a young dragon named Roaring Drago.

Roaring Drago was a very nice young dragon, but he was also very powerful, meaning that the people who lived at the base of the mountain he called home were too scared to ever come say hello.

Time went by as Roaring Drago watched over the nearby village in envy. He watched the children play as the adults talked happily amongst themselves. He wanted to be there. He wanted to play with the children and talk with the adults.

But he couldn't.

As a dragon, if he tried to go visit the village, the villagers would only run away screaming. If only he were a human or at least looked like one...

With these despair-filled thoughts plaguing his mind, Roaring Drago went to sleep for the night.

When he awoke, Roaring Drago found himself in a dream world, one where he was a handsome prince attending a magic college with people his age.

'Finally!' Roaring Drago thought to himself, 'I finally get to interact with humans!'

However, Roaring Drago would soon realize that his dreaming life was too similar to his waking one: Facing isolation as the people around him feared his power.

'This isn't what I wanted...' Roaring Drago thought as time went by in his dream, 'I want a friend! I want to meet just one person who isn't afraid of me!'

And before he knew it, his wish was granted.

Soon came along a young man. One who, unlike the other residents of his dream, couldn't use magic. One who, also unlike the others, didn't know him and, as such, didn't fear him.

Roaring Drago was overjoyed to meet and befriend this young man. However, watching him flounder about the college due to his lack of magic made him sad and so he wished for a way for his friend to succeed, which was granted in the form of him making friends who could use their magic to help.

Roaring Drago thought that he would be satisfied with this. To watch his new friend use these tools to succeed and graduate from the college, but his time there would soon come to a close unceremoniously if that's all that happened.

He wished for something exciting to happen that both he and his friend could enjoy...and then a handful of students began transforming into monsters.

At first, Roaring Drago was concerned for his friend, thinking that the monsters would be too much for him, but with the help of his other friends, Roaring Drago watched him triumph again and again, gaining more popularity and prestige with each victory.

Roaring Drago thought he would be happy to see this, but the march of time waits for no one and soon the time of their parting would be at hand.

And what would happen then?

Would Roaring Drago wake up? Would he return to his lonely reality without his only friend by his side? And what would become of his friend?

His friend's rise to fame only happened because he willed it so, therefore it was possible that his departure would reduce him back to a lone nobody.

No. He couldn't let that happen.

If this dream world couldn't last forever, then Mal-- Roaring Drago would simply have to take them to another one, one deeper in the realm of dreams where their adventures could begin anew!

And if the next dream had to end, then he would just go deeper!

And deeper!

And deeper!

Anddeeperanddeeperanddeeperanddeeperanddeeper–*the rest of the pages are illegible due to being covered in a mysterious black substance*

[asimplearchivist]

(This has been sitting in my drafts long enough…my fear of mischaracterizing Astarion is lesser than the agitation of seeing this beast among my WIPs. @fangswbenefits I’m affectionately blaming you for giving me pale elf brain rot🫣)

Okay guys this may be a very niche concept that will appeal to maybe like two people total but it hasn’t left my mind since I mentioned the idea to a buddy of mine who convinced me to play bg3…(Cullen and Astarion have a lot of similarities, which I would love to elaborate on later, but…) hear me out—it could be a very interesting dynamic to play with in a crossover.

Headcanons under the cut:

I’m not usually one for crossovers unless they’re in self-contained within a fandom (like Pokémon or Dragon Age, for example—there’s a phenomenal fic called The Half-Life of Element Zero by @unhealthynpcobsession which is a DAI/MEA crossover and safely one of the only “cross-fandom” crossovers I genuinely enjoy and adore bc the story and concepts are contextually sound and professionally orchestrated), but I feel like the sheer numbers of DAI fanfiction that explore the concept of the Breach opening up portals into other worlds (namely our modern Earth, thus the Modern Girl in Thedas trope, my beloved) could include adjacent worlds. I believe I have seen Skyrim before, so why not Baldur’s Gate 3? (Now keep in mind I know next to nothing about BG3 bc I am newly introduced to its lore and everything but) I think one could easily get away with having Astarion somehow slip through the Breach, along with the Sole Survivor at the Conclave.

(Holy shit why did this turn out so fucking long?)

The Survivor wakes—chained, cold, and aching—in the cells beneath the chantry, interrogated by Cassandra and Leliana, and denies her involvement with the Temple’s destruction. Forced to cooperate with the Survivor due to their dire need for the Mark and its potential use related to the Rifts, Cassandra casts a scowl at Leliana. “I will escort the prisoner if you will deal with the pale elf.”

Leliana only responds mildly, “I will continue to deal with him as I have been for the last three days—as well as nurse the migraine that he has caused.”

The Survivor doesn’t meet this esteemed “pale elf” until the battle at the Temple, and she only sees him from afar—he accompanied Leliana’s men to deal with the array of Shades and Wraiths that speckled the cratered grounds while the rest picked away at gargantuan Pride. She notices he is masterfully skilled with his weapons, perhaps even peculiarly so—she also notices that he has far greater strength, agility, and stamina than the average elf, easily surpassing the abilities of his peers.

She doesn’t see him again until well after the dust has settled—the Breach has been patched, Haven is able to reassess themselves, and the new Inquisition begins to construct their foundation. The newly named Herald of Andraste attempts to escape it all, fleeing into the grounds beyond Haven’s gates under the guise of fulfilling favors and errands for the various supervisors in the village, and stumbles across an abandoned cabin in the forest—at least she thought it was abandoned, at first.

She’s rummaging through the things there, finds the passed healer’s notes, but the lightest creak of displaced wood behind her tips her off to the presence of another. She whirls, hand already flying to her weapon, and backs up against the table, sending things clattering to the floor. The pale elf stands there, smirking at her startle.

“Act all the victim when you intrude on my space,” he croons, tilting his head and tutting at her, “my, how manners seem hard to come by around here.”

“You’re that—” She stops, hesitates, starts again. “Sister Leliana mentioned you. You’re the only other one who survived the blast.”

“That is comparatively the least of my problems and only the beginning of my present predicament, yes.” His eyes—as brilliant a crimson as the blood that still crusts the wounds that litter her bruised, battered, borderline broken body—scan her form from top to bottom, pause on her bandaged hand, and return to meet her uneasy gaze with a considerate one of his own. “Although I’m afraid I can confidently say that I ended up with the better of the lots drawn between the two of us.” His expression relaxes, just a little, a thready furrow forming between his silverite brows. “Does that hurt?”

She clenches her fist and clenches her teeth. “It’s dismissible.”

“Considering I heard tell that it is in the process of consuming you, I would disagree—but, I digress!” He flashes her a toothy smirk. “I am just grateful that there are no longer demons spewing out of that torn arsehole in the sky.”

She stares at him for a long moment, uncertain what to say in response. She’s exhausted, sore, and reeling from the last week of utter unfortunate bullshit that had befallen her.

“You’re…rather tall, for an elf,” she finally says lamely.

His brows arch into his forehead in clear surprise before he tips his head back and laughs. It exposes his teeth, and…no, those were not fangs. It must have been a trick of the firelight.

“It does seem that my kindred, however distantly related they are, do not possess as generous of traits as I,” he chuckles, shaking his head. “All so thin and lithe and…well, diminutive…it’s truly a marvel how they’re able to get anything done without breaking their hollow little bones. It’s little wonder that they seem so afraid of everyone else around here.”

She frowns, echoing, “‘Distantly related’?” with some dubiousness.

“Oh, your lovely spymaster didn’t tell you? I’m shocked.” The stranger gestures to himself with his arms extended to either side. “You have my sincerest apologies, my dear, I haven’t even introduced myself—I complain of lack of manners, yet fail to offer them in due turn.” He dips at the waist briefly, eyes glittering through his frosty lashes. “My name is Astarion, and…to put it simply, I am not supposed to be here.”

“I imagine anyone is fortunate to have walked away from all that destruction unscathed,” she responds mildly, narrowing her eyes.

“How cute,” he simpers, straightening and bracing his hands on his hips. “I fail to possess sufficient enough knowledge of magic in order to explain how in the hells this happened, exactly, but I originate from a place called Faerûn—not your delightfully archaic ‘Thedas’.”

He goes on to ramble about his companions, at least two of whom would have been far better suited to hypothesize how to rectify this particular ‘magical’ predicament. He tells her about their unusual circumstances of being thrust together, forced to cooperate and work towards fixing their looming health issues and the threat that faces their world.

She studies him for a long moment after he finishes. “…It sounds as if you and I are trapped in similar problems,” she sighs, rubbing her face. “As incredible as this all sounds, I sincerely doubt such a story could be easily invented on the spot…so you have my sympathies. Do you think that you’ll be able to return home?”

“Sister Leliana introduced me to that lovely gentleman who dresses like a vagrant. Supposedly, he’s the resident authority on this…‘Fade magic’, as it were?” he surmises.

“So I’ve heard,” she responds.

“Yes, well, our conversation was cut rather short at the time due to him being rather persistent in keeping his eye on that little souvenir.”

She flexes her hand and glances away. She’s been doing her damnedest not to dwell on the burning in her palm, thank you very much, and she didn’t particularly want to discuss it, either.

“Nevertheless,” he continues lightly, although his tone tempers into something more neutral, “he promised that he would look into the issue.”

“That’s…that’s good,” she replies quietly. “I hope he finds a way to send you back.”

The pale elf tilts his head at her then, eyes contemplative when she looks back up. He offers her a thin-lipped smile—this one actually reaches his eyes, softening his angular features. “As much as I am grateful not to be in your position, I do apologize. It would seem that the weight of your new moniker is not one to be taken lightly.”

“It is what it is,” she grits out. “They will believe what they wish regardless of my input.”

“That doesn’t make it any easier.” He leans in, holding her stare. “…I think it best to remain nearby, for the time being. Sole survivors of a devastating explosion still under scrutiny by those newly in power ought to stick together, yes?”

She relaxes, just slightly. “As long as you’re not the one who caused all of this.”

His expression sobers enough that it jars her. “I am the least inclined to cause spontaneous combustion among my compatriots,” he tells her, attempting humor, but there’s something in his eyes that contrasts his words entirely—a lingering fear, apprehension, borderline horror, if she has to place a name on it. “But no. I did not. And I think I have a few choice words—and daggers—on reserve for whoever did cause all of this devastation. I never asked to be thrown into the middle of this refuse burn.”

“Neither did I.” She offers him a bow in return and gives him her name. “I would say it’s been pleasant to make your acquaintance, but…I think we both are allowed to say that we would rather not have met at all.”

“Agreed.” He stoops to pick up the papers Adan had sent her to find and hands them to her. “I trust I will see you again soon?”

“You do intend to stay?” she asks, brow furrowing as she tucks them into her pocket.

“I’ve nowhere else to go,” he begins, “and fleeing from an investigation would provide rather damning evidence for the prosecution, even if misused. For now I’ll lend my particular set of skills and…services to this delightful little collection of vagabonds. I think you need all the help you can get, given that poor, overworked general of yours is relying on farmers and pilgrims to become your armed force.”

“I don’t speak on behalf of the others,” she says, “but I thank you. You’re greatly appreciated.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he purrs. “Now…do go get some rest, my dear. You look positively horrible for someone who has slept for nearly six days.”

His nonchalant sincerity startles a laugh out of her—the first in what felt like an age. He seems pleased to have done so. She departs the cabin feeling slightly less isolated than before.

[blackjackkent]

Oh hey, I forgot Buddy hadn't shown up in camp yet! :D He followed us all the way to the mountain pass! Good boy, Buddy!

(In Mass Effect and Dragon Age my pets were all named differently on different playthroughs but for some reason Buddy is always Buddy to me in all worldstates. XD I have no reason for this. He just is.)

Rakha doesn't wake immediately as the cub enters the camp. She is locked in yet another dream of gore and death, memories of unfathomable destruction mixed with the scent of blood all over her hands. She lies on the bedroll, restless, twitching, her breath fast and shallow.

The owlbear cub watches curiously as she writhes within her dreams and then gives a soft questioning hoot.

She snaps awake, both fists clenched at her sides, her eyes suddenly wide and pupils dilated in the darkness. The cub darts back a step out of her reach and hoots again softly. It takes her a moment to remember where she is, what is happening - and what this clawed thing in front of her is.

Narrator: You recognize the feathered creature - it's the owlbear cub you rescued.

The beast urge in her head welcomes the new arrival as it welcomes all new faces. Kill. A boot strike to the face, crush the beak back up into the brain--

But stronger and more immediate is her recollection of Wyll helping her meet Scratch out in the forest, or the cub itself in the goblin camp - calmness, a hand outstretched. This creature is no threat - and in fact might be like the dog, another source of unexpected comfort. Attack with purpose. There is no purpose here.

So she forces her breathing to slow, her heart to calm, and sits up, eyeing the cub cautiously.

[ANIMAL HANDLING] Beckon him closer.

She reaches out her hand as she remembers Wyll doing, very carefully, knuckles loose.

Narrator: The cub tilts his head. He does not trust you - yet.

Rakha actually feels the strange tug of a smile on her face that has nothing to do with the dark urge. Of course the cub does not trust her. She understands this. She is the same way with anyone she does not know. Careful and dangerous. It is only with those in this camp that she has begun to feel moderately comfortable - because they have the tadpole in common, because they have proved to be of use to each other, to understand each other.

The cub, then, will not trust her until she is of use to it as well.

Fetch a piece of food from your bag.

(A/N: I still love that literally everyone in camp approves of this except Lae'zel. In this case I fully believe Lae'zel is still just grumpy at Rakha in general. XD )

Narrator: The cub's eyes lock onto the food in your hand.

(A/N: I also cannot get over how fucking cute they managed to make this animal. The owlbear cub is the platonic ideal of the Round Friend-Shaped Creature and even Rakha is not immune to it.)

Keep the food held out in front of you.

Narrator: He takes a hesitant step toward you, his beak chittering hungrily.

There's a soft step behind Rakha. Wyll has emerged from his tent and is watching this little interchange play out. There's a small smile on his face, almost affectionate; it's hard to tell if it's directed at Rakha or the cub. Perhaps both.

"When I see a creature as sweet as that," he murmurs, "I hardly miss the Gate at all."

He hasn't spoken loudly, but the cub and Rakha both jump at the unexpected voice as if struck with electricity.

Narrator: Alarmed by your companion's approach, the cub turns heel and runs.

Rakha gives Wyll an imposing glare at the interruption, but Wyll just laughs softly. "It'll be back," he says lightly. "Be on your guard, or risk getting a peck!"

[sea-side-scribbles]

Solas wakes up in the strange new world of his own making and it terrifies him. Ridden with guilt, he joins the Inquisition and begins his lonely research in order to correct his mistake.

He doesn’t expect to find consolation in the presence of a human who wields ancient elven magic without knowing it. Who is way too gentle for an elgar’thanelan, but doesn’t know that either.

Solas, for his part, doesn’t know how to stay away.

Dorian wonders if the mysterious elf just enjoys playing with a Tevinter. He wouldn’t expect anything else.

_____________________

Chapter 1- 13 | Right after uthenera, Solas is found by a Dalish clan. This goes well until it doesn’t. (Basically my excuse for world building and hilarious misunderstandings.)

Chapter 14 | Solas joins the Inquisition.

Chapter 20 | Dorian appears in Haven.

Chapter 34

Running down the stairs, they came across Ellana and Cassandra, whose conversation had also been interrupted by the alarm. Then Blackwall appeared at Solas' side with an unruly cussing Sera. Varric found them when they were almost at the gates.

Arriving at their destination, the party met Leliana, Josephine and Cullen. Cassandra pressed forward, demanding answers from the Commander and he shocked her by saying that there was a massive force approaching Haven, under no banner. They looked up in time to see the army coming down the mountain.

“No...!”

Solas' stomach turned.

Dorian heard him and eyed him curiously.

“Assaulting the sky surely brought some attention”, Blackwall grunted as gloomy as always.

“Shit, shit, shit, pissbag arsehole cock pricks!”, Sera shouted at his side.

Then something detonated behind the gate. Everyone drew their weapons, until a meek voice pleaded: “I can't come in unless you open!”

They stared at each other, confused. It was Ellana who dashed forward and pushed the heavy doors open. They gave way to a single soldier with a battleaxe, who staggered over a pile of his dead companions into her direction. Not quite a threat, but Cullen rushed to her aid anyway.

Then the soldier suddenly fell and a harmless looking young man appeared behind him, with nothing but leather clothes for protection and a dagger. The wide brim of his hat covered most of his face.

Solas eyed the dead enemies around him.

Did he...?

“I'm Cole”, he said in a dreamy manner. “I came to warn you. To help. People are coming to hurt you. You probably already know.”

Solas couldn't stop staring at him.

“What is this? What's going on?”, Ellana blurted out, obviously just as confused.

His voice deepened dramatically. “The templars come to kill you.”

Now Cullen flared up: “Templars? Is this the Order's response to our talks with the mages? Attacking blindly?”

He startled Cole, who hurried behind Ellana's back. From there, he whispered: “The red templars went to the Elder One. You know him? He knows you. You took his mages.”

“I know that man...” Cullen rasped, squinting at the mountain. “But this Elder One...”

“Creators!” Ellana gasped at the sight of the monster that appeared by the templar's side.

“He's very angry that you took his mages”, Cole said as if he felt the anger himself.

Ellana urged the Commander: “Cullen, give me a plan! Anything!”

“Haven is no fortress”, he analysed quickly. “If we are to withstand this monster, we must control the battle. Get out there and hit that force! Use everything you can!” He pointed at the trebuchets at the fence.

Ellana understood.

She and her party ran to save the village while Cullen's voice roared behind them, riling up the mages against an unknown enemy. When Solas heard hundreds of voices shout back, his skin crawled.

How many of them were really ready to give their lives?

“Bull!”, Ellana cried as the Qunari appeared with his Chargers. “Help us protect the trebuchets! We need to throw all we have at these monsters!”

“No problem, Boss!”, the Qunari growled. “You heard her, guys! It's smashing time!”

Solas looked around, but it seemed Cole had disappeared, just like that.

“What are red templars?”, he thought out loud, regretting that it was too late to ask.

“Oh, fuck that!”, Varric of all people took up the thread. “Fuck all of that!"

“Care to elaborate, Master Tethras?”

“I knew that red Lyrium would come back to bite us in the ass!”

“Red Lyrium! Yes, you have a point!”

“I'm glad to help. Can't share your enthusiasm, though.”

“Varric?” Ellana caught up on them. “Any advice?”

“Stay the fuck away from those templars!”

“No touching, no licking the creepy templars”, Dorian concluded. “Got it.”

“Is that your battleplan, my dear?”, Vivienne appeared behind them. A magical blade glowed in her hand until she quenched it to return the handle to her back.

“All we have is the trebuchets”, Ellana repeated. “We need to protect them as long as we can!”

Vivienne glanced at the fence, calculating.

“Take your position at the front of the battle, Knight Enchanter”, Solas added.

That earned him a faint smirk and a nod. Solas guessed she didn't approve of losing her life here, but she considered it possible.

She sliced her way towards the gate, where the mages and soldiers defended the bottleneck.

The templars that came through ran into the Chargers – and Ellana's squad. Some of them resembled humans, others had turned into fearsome creatures with lumps of mutated flesh and red crystals breaking through their skin.

Their song rang in Solas' ears. He made sure to keep the barriers intact.

“Withstand their call!”, he shouted at Dorian over the noise.

“Aww, must I? I meant to run into their arms and put flower wreaths around their necks!”, the Necromancer responded sarcastically as he threw flames at them.

Solas snorted at his humour at death's door. He really began to like this man.

They defended the north trebuchet until it fired, causing a short cheerful moment for everyone. But then they noticed the southern one wasn't firing and had to see what was wrong. Of course, there was a mob of templars surrounding it.

“Stinky frigging templar bollockfaces! Oh, supplies!”, Sera shouted and dashed for a chest. The party gladly followed.

The templars were eerily adamant, fighting with even many of their limbs missing or bloodied, as if driven by a different force than their own willpower. Sera's poison melted their flesh, but they charged at Cassandra and Blackwall either way, who had to keep away from both the poison and the Lyrium.

Solas felt Cassandra's smite before it slammed a templar onto the ground.

“They do not like that”, she gloated at their fate.

As they fought, Ellana ran up to the trebuchet to align it and fire. The shot caused an avalanche that rolled down the slope and took the hostile army with it.

Suddenly, there was silence.

The party broke out in cheers, out of breath and bleeding, but then they heard a screech and a red projectile from the sky shot into their direction. Running away with all of their strength, they felt the heat on their backs when the trebuchet exploded.

Solas spotted a pair of grey wings disappearing behind a mountain.

“A dragon!”

“And now the day is really ruined!” Dorian came to a halt next to him.

Solas cast him a short glance, but there was no time to waste.

The beast left a swath of destruction in its way. It was about to destroy the village and there was little they could do.

“Is everyone still alive?” Sera popped up behind them. “I think I am...almost...”

“Back to the gates!”, Ellana shouted “We need a new plan!”

Many houses burned and crumbled already. They saw a man kicking against a pile of boxes that blocked the door of the smithy.

“Harrit!” Blackwall recognised him and ran off to help. “Beardy!”, Sera shouted after him. “Wait!”

The warden threw himself against the obstacles and the wood splintered as it gave in. The door flew open and Harrit went inside to save what he could while Sera helped Blackwall back onto his feet. “Careful with that hardhead of yours! You still need it!”

At the gate, they met Cullen again, who instructed everyone to seek shelter in the Chantry. He glared at the dragon, the monster that destroyed them effortlessly.

Solas felt cold when he thought about his little group of allies. Were there no other options?

The Iron Bull stormed through the gate, followed by the Chargers. They hacked through doors and windows of the huts to get trapped people out. The dragon's strange breath flew like meteors above their heads, smashing stone walls as if they were made of cards.

Was that really fire?

There were cries for help coming out of the burning tavern. Its roof looked like it was about to collapse.

“That's Flissa!”, Varric shouted.

The same moment, the woodwork gave in.

While Varric shouted, Ellana shot her arms up and vines burst through the ground. They held the roof open, just about.

Suddenly, the air began to thicken around them, then let go and the party rushed to the tavern with double the speed. Solas turned to Dorian, who had obviously cast haste on them. He looked exhausted.

How long would he hold on?

They pulled the bartender out before the roof came down and buried the tavern for good.

The smell of burned flesh hung in the air as they made their way further up.

At the apothecary, Adan and Minaeve were cornered by the flames. Solas managed to freeze the fires before they could reach the explosive potions in front of the building.

At the Chantry, another group of templars attacked villagers, trying Cassandra's patience. Her smite knocked one of them right into Blackwall's sword.

Solas saw Bull and the Chargers hastening inside, carrying injured villagers.

How many were lost?

This was a disaster.

One that could've been prevented if only he had known...

Finally in the Chantry, the spirits weren't high there, either.

They saw Chancellor Roderick collapse into the arms of – Cole. There he was again.

“He tried to stop a templar. The blade went deep. He's going to die”, he explained without euphemizing.

“What a...charming boy”, Roderick panted, struggling to stand.

Then Cullen came running towards them. “Herald! Our position is not good! That dragon stole back any time you might have earned us!”

“I've seen an archdemon...”, Cole was unbothered by the Commander's haste. “I was in the fade, but it looked like that.”

“I don't care what it looks like!”, Cullen snapped at him. “It has cut a path for that army! They'll kill everyone in Haven!”

“The Elder One doesn't care about the village. He only wants the Herald.”

Everyone looked back at Ellana, who tried to make sense out of that.

“What does it want from me?”, she asked, even though she could guess the answer.

“You have the anchor”, Cole answered.

“The...” She looked at her hand, guessing right.

Cullen was still thinking practically. “Herald, there a no tactics to make this survivable. The only thing that slowed them was the avalanche. We could turn the remaining trebuchets, cause one last slide.”

Ellana's expression hardened. “We would kill every single person in here.”

“We're dying, but we can decide how”, Cullen admitted, glaring wildly. “Many don't get that choice.”

Silence ensued.

Solas began to search for a way out … for his people.

He needed to get past Corypheus. Hide while the others fought, no matter how he felt about it.

But if the Herald died here...and the magister got the anchor...That wasn't an option either.

And the orb? He only needed to get his hands on it.

But he couldn't get close enough. Corypheus' power was way beyond his own. His only chance would be another miracle...

Cole interrupted his thoughts. “Yes, that”, he sighed as if he found the solution. “Chancellor Roderick can help. He wants to say it before he dies.”

Now everyone's attention belonged to the Chancellor.

“There is a path....”, the cleric rasped between breaths. “You wouldn't know it unless you'd made the summer pilgrimage...As I have.”

He struggled to stand up and faced Ellana.

“The people can escape. She must've shown me. Andraste must have shown me, so I could...tell you..” His look became pleading. “It was whim that I walked the path, I did not mean to start – it was overgrown. Now, with so many of the Conclave dead, to be the only one who remembers...I don't know, Herald. If this simple memory can save us, this could be more than mere accident. You could be more.”

“Your information will save lives, Chancellor”, Ellana said as softly as she could. “The people of Haven will know that. We'll be forever grateful for your help. May your Maker guide you safely through the Fade...”

The Chancellor's expression smoothed and he closed his eyes. Cole carefully lay him onto a bench so he could rest.

“Cullen, let your soldiers spread the news! The people need to leave now!” , Ellana went on.

The Commander, glad about the turn of events, began to bark orders.

Meanwhile Ellana asked Cole:“What are we going to do about the archdemon?”

“It won't stray from the Elder One”, the boy assured her, not leaving Roderick's side. “He's here for you.”

“That's nice, but doesn't tell me how to kill it!” She spat and wiped her brow. “So, if we leave, that monster and the archdemon will still be out there following us.”

“We'd be sitting ducks!” Cullen came back. “If that dragon finds us traipsing in the mountains, we're done for!”

“It is possible that the Elder One can track the energy of your mark”, Solas offered, not exactly lightening up the mood. A short pause was the outcome.

“Eh, if that's really an archdemon, it's gonna be my job”, Blackwall carefully butted in.

“Yours alone?”, Dorian quipped. “Not to hide your light under a bushel, but I think that beast is too much even for your hardhead.”

“It won't fight you”, Cole added. “It wants the Herald.”

“Picky motherfucker...” the Warden growled.

“So, if the people are to have a chance...” Ellana pressed her eyes shut. “Look, this is not about me, that mark is killing me anyway and I'm here to save the world...but...If I run out there, without a plan...I will just die! I don't know what I'm facing! And then what? How's this going to work? All I can do is cause the avalanche...because the one who's causing it will die...” She realized something. “If I can distract this thing...lure it and its dragon into the village...and shoot the trebuchet then...that would maybe kill them both...”

Cullen stared at her. His expression betrayed what he thought of this plan.

“You mean, we need just another miracle by the almighty Herald of Andraste?”, Dorian said what everybody probably thought.

“Do you have a better plan?”

Cullen found his voice again. “Perhaps you will surprise it...find a way...” His face puckered. He didn't seem to find the right expression for this. Then he hardened again. “My soldiers are loading the trebuchets. If you are doing this, keep the Elder One's attention until we're above the tree line.”

“Understood”, she said without hesitation. To her party, she said: “It was a pleasure knowing you all.”

“Wait...”, Varric woke up. “Shiny, you're not thinking of doing this alone, do you?”

“All I need to do is to fire the trebuchet! I will not sacrifice you just so you can hold my hand!”

“There are still templars out there and nobody's defending the gates right now!”

“Varric is right”, Cassandra said. “If you want to have a chance to reach the fence, you need protection.”

“Alright, but everybody who wants to leave, can leave.”

“Bullshit! Nobody wants to leave, stupid!”

“Sera...”

“I got fifty arrows to shove right up that Elderberry's arse!”

“No! You are the youngest of us! You will leave with the others!”

“What? I'm not your bloody “dallying”, Her Ladybits! You're gonna need arrows!”

“I think bolts will do just as well”, Varric said patting Bianca.

“You piss off! Who said you're gonna go?”

“Sera...”, Blackwall began, his voice a soft buzz. She stared at him, eyes widening in shock. “Come on, get out of here. You got noble arses to kick with your Jennies.”

“And you're gonna stay here or what?!” She was on the edge of tears.

“You heard me, this is an archdemon! This is what I wanted my entire life! It's either this or kicking the bucket somewhere in the ass-end of the Deep Roads and I hate those bloody Deep Roads!”

“I knew it! Grey Wardens are stupid!”, she sobbed. “You're a stupid pissballs hero and I hate you!”

She dashed into his arms and everybody averted their eyes to give their last goodbye some privacy.

Quieter, Ellana said to the Lady Seeker: “Cassandra, you're leaving as well.” Before the warrior could protest, she added: “This is not about your skills. You're the leader of the Inquisition. You stay with them.”

She looked surprised. “I am not the leader, only the founder.”

“But you are who these people look up to! Who they would seek for comfort! They need you now! Leliana is too scary to shine light into anyone's heart. And Cullen...he's a bit of a brute, even if a pretty one...”

Cullen blushed deeply at this, the pink colour reached even his ears.

Cassandra couldn't suppress a smirk. “I think I am kind of a brute as well.”

“But you have faith in your Maker! You awaken that faith in others, no matter if they believe in the Maker or not. The Inquisition might pray to me as if I was an idol, but they only believe in me because you do. You are the closest to what a Dalish Keeper should be and if you learned to soften your heart a little, people would actually dare to approach you.”

Cassandra opened her mouth, but apparently didn't know what to say. She reddened a bit, too.

“So, go with your people. You have wounds to heal, chaos to sort...And demons to fight.”

Ellana looked at Solas. “That's why you will leave with them.”

Solas stared at her. He had expected to come with her without discussion.

“You need my protection, Herald...Ellana...!”, he stuttered.

She shook her head. “The rest of the world needs you more. There are still rifts everywhere. Cassandra showed me the report a few hours ago. They didn't close along with the Breach as we hoped.”

“But I...”

“You are the only one who can hope to find a way to close them without me!”

“I have never closed a rift before...!”

“I know! And I have never fought an archdemon or any other of these monsters we faced today! And it still has to work out somehow! Pray to the creators! You're not Dalish, but they won't turn a blind eye to any elf who's asking for their help! I know I will pray for you! Either way, sacrificing you here would be nonsense!”

Solas found himself out of words, just like Cassandra. And unfortunately, she even had a point...Trying to get the orb and to escape the avalanche at the same time would be ridiculous. How convenient instead, to come back later and take it from the hands of his trapped enemy. While walking on the corpses of his dead friends.

He wanted to throw up.

Done with him, the Herald faced Dorian. “You'll have hell of a story to tell back in Tevinter.” Her smile was more tense than needed, but she tried.

Dorian looked confused. “Does that mean you dismiss me too?”

“I can't ask you to stay.”

“Look at your party! It's only you, Blackwall and Varric against the nightmares out there! The others are leaving for good reasons, but I have no excuse! Besides, how would that look? The Tevinter saving his own ass and leaving the Herald to die?”

No.

Solas couldn't believe what he heard.

Where was that useless Knight Enchanter?

He looked around, but Madame de Fer had successfully squirmed herself out of battle.

“You would sacrifice yourself to avoid gossip?“ he heard Ellana ask Pavus as his blood began to boil.

“Avoiding gossip is my speciality, except for the good sort. Also, that Elder One is the leader of the Venatori, yes? My fellow countrymen! Perhaps we can have a nice chat and sort the matter out.” His voice was higher than usual and his nonchalance not quite so smooth. But he didn't falter. Solas couldn't keep his eyes off him.

She snorted, a sort of confused amusement. Then they heard a terrible shriek from outside, followed by an explosion. The dragon continued its work.

“Creators, we have to go!” Ellana shot a look outside. “Dorian, if you save yourself, I won't hold it against you!”

“But I pretty much would”, Pavus decided. To the survivors, he said: “Perhaps one of you can learn to write decently, so you can turn this into a legend.”

“The tale of Her Ladybits, Ser Fancypants, Itchy Words and Pissballs Hero hunting Elderberries...”, Sera tried and everyone broke out in roaring laughter.

And tears.

Solas shook Blackwall's hand stiffly, as if someone else moved his limbs. The man's handshake was almost crushing his fingers.

Varric slapped his shoulder. “Pour one for me, Chuckles.”, his deep voice rasped into his ear.

The durgen'len of the new world. The strangest one he ever new. And he'd lose him now.

Solas' own voice was hoarse when he said: “Farewell, Master Tethras.”

He almost had no words for Ellana. All he could manage was a whisper: “You shouldn't have to do this...”

“Aw, come here...”, she muttered and then – crushed him between her arms. Solas was perplexed, returning the hug just as mechanically as he had shaken Blackwall's hand.

Then he stared into Pavus' warm grey eyes for too long. His lips parted, but no words escaped them. Their awkward silence was unnoticed by the others who said their farewells.

When another shriek rang out from outside, everyone turned their attention back to the exit. It was time to leave.

Stuttering a few words, their meaning lost to Solas, Pavus went along with the others.

Solas wanted to shout after him. Stop him. Or say goodbye.

Anything.

He was still staring when the hallway was empty.

“Solas?”, Cassandra called.

Ordered.

Her voice echoed in the abandoned hall.

He felt empty himself when he turned his head.

But he complied.

[springfieldwater]

All Mine | part 2 |

Bakugo x reader (quirkless au!)

Third POV over Bakugo

He slammed his door open not wanting to be bothered. He sat down on his couch, petting his gray cat. (he seems like a gray cat or orange owner tbh). He got up and went to get his cat and himself something to eat. He sat down on his leather couch. Then his phone started to ring. It was his mom. “What” “What do you mean ‘what’. I am your mother and I can call you whenever I want to,” she scrolled him. Bakugou just sat there with an angry face. “Anyways, how are you?” He was about to give her an asshole response and then she said “Do you have a girlfriend yet?” “WHY DO YOU CARE!!!!” “ Well, if you don’t find someone at your age you’ll die lonely. You will end up being an old cat lady,” she laughed at him. “You know what I am actually seeing someone if you really wanted to know you really wanted to know,” he said cockily, knowing damn well that he wasn’t seeing someone. “Really, I want to meet her. Isn’t your winter break coming? You should bring her along to the house.” “Fine,” he said, “I will.” He hung up. “Fuck,” he thought, “What the fuck did I just do.” His phone pinned.

Y/n

Hey bakugo

You wanna play minecraft

Bakugo :(

no

Y/n

(ಥ﹏ಥ)

Then he thought “nah that won’t work… just ask her you idiot… she'll think I’m a fucken creep”

Bakugo :(

Can I ask for something?

Y/n

Only if you play minecraft with me

♪~ ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Bakugo :(

Fine

Y/n

ok

What do you what

Bakugo :(

I need you to come with me to my parents house during winter break

Y/n

?

What for

Bakugo :(

My mom asked me to bring a friend.

Y/n

⚆ _ ⚆

And you chose me

little miss me

Bakugo :(

You are not that special

Y/n

Yet you choose me

so you wanna play minecraft

Cuz if you do i can start a new server

Bakugo :(

Just give the name of your server 😈

Y/n

No you will just blow up my precious house

Bakugo :(

fine

just make the server

Y/n

ok

here

Server name: Bakugousucks

Bakugo :(

I WILL FUCKEN SHOW YOU THAT I AM THE BEST

Y/n

ok

Just join

Bakugo’s POV:

We were playing all night. I didn't really care about the time, since I don’t have any classes tomorrow, or should I say today. “You're not tired?” I asked her since we were on a call. “nope,” she said, but you could obviously tell she was falling asleep. “Just go to sleep, dumbass. I can literally tell that you are falling asleep.” “No, we have to beat the ender dragon.” “We don't even have ender pearls, so how are we going to beat it?” “ We need more gold.” “For?” “To go to the nether and trade with the piglens, duh (🙄).”

We ended up mining. Surprisingly, we found almost six stacks of gold, plus the gold we already had, we for sure would get more than 12.

She went through the portal first and we started trading with the piglens.

“MAN, WHAT THE FUCK!” I yelled. “I KNOW RIGHT! LIKE HOW THE FUCK ARE THESE MF’s GOING TO SCAM US LIKE THIS!!” The piglens only gave us 5 ender pearls, and we already gave them over ⅔ of the gold we had. “They don't deserve to live,” she sounded so sinisterly. We ended up killing them.

We went back through the portal.

“Should we go to the end???” she asks. “I don't know. You wanna go.” “Yeah, but I'm kinda tired to be honest” “Well no shit, it's literally about to be 4” “I know, I know… um i'll talk to you later so we can continue, ok” “Yeah, I'm cool with that” “Ok good night Katsuki” “Night” i scoffed at her good night since it was about to be the time that i usually wake up. “Fuck it's late”

Before I crashed into my bed, I went to feed my cat.

~

I woke up to my cat sitting on my chest, demanding for some food.

“Shit” I said as I saw the time on my nightstand. It was nearly 1 pm. I got up to feed my dumbass cat,again. I grabbed my phone to see 6 missed calls from my mom. “Oh Fuck me”

I called her back to see what she wanted.

“FOR FUCKS SAKE KATSUKI I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIED” “ JUST BECAUSE I DONT ANSWER YOU DOESNT MEAN I DIED” “DONT YOU YELL AT YOUR OWN MOTHER and are you barely waking up?” “Don't worry about it” “Are you sick? This isn't like you to be waking up at this time. Do you want me to come over? I'll make you something to eat.” “I'm not sick. Don't even think about coming over. I just didn't want to get up. Plus I have plans either way.” “Anyways I wanted to remind you about your winter break and about how you are still bringing your girlfriend, right?” “Yeah, I know already you don't have to remind me every five seconds.” “Well you never know, Katsuki. Things happen and you might just forget. Well, I’ll let you go since you have plans.” “K bye.”

Finally, she hunged up the phone.

I got up and changed into a black tank top, gray [collage name] sweatshirt, and some dark brown cargo pants with black Nike air max.

I made some toast with avocado and an egg for breakfast. And some coffee. Washed the dishes and went to brush my teeth and grabbed my wallet and keys and then I headed out towards my car.

I arrived at my local grocery store. “Fuck, I'm never staying up that late playing fucken minecraft.”

I go inside and grab all the stuff I need to make my meal prep for the week and other stuff.

Shitty Hair

YO!!!!!!!!!

BAKUBRO

Bakugo

what

Shitty Hair

you want to come over

we are having a like a sleepover 😸

@7

Bakugo

tf

who is we

Shitty Hair

me mina denki and y/n

we r prolly going to watch some movies

so….you wanna go 😁

Bakugo

k

Shitty Hair

really bro 🥹

Bakugo

stfu or else i won't go

Shitty Hair

ok bro 😭

There goes my plan for dinner. I went home and started to cook my weekly meal prep.

🤘😛

[prismaticaurene]

The first blighting tree is small and sickly, born far from the depths of the Maguuma Jungle, long before the Dragon wakes. After all, it doesn’t need to be big. Not for what it was made for. Not empowered now as far to the south,  The Glory of Tyria knocks Zhaitan from its perch and the dragon’s magic sinks into the bones of the planet itself.

Caithe makes a mistake, you see, in not burning the body of her fallen sister. She couldn’t have known what would happen next. --- Wynne dies, and for almost twenty years, her soul remained in the Domain of the Lost-- taking the form of the Grove, choked out of life and magic by Mordrem vines. It's not a pleasant place, and she's not in a place where she can pull herself out of it, like the Commander will. Instead, Mordremoth tears her out-- fracturing her identity as he does (the name Wynne no longer fitting comfortably) -- to watch him destroy the world. She's no longer connected to the Dream. Her siblings think her dead. (The Dragon, knowing that she told Caithe the truth, deals one last blow-- and takes from her her voice, so that she can never do that again.) It's by luck that she finds a Priory squad in the Silverwastes. It's by persistence that she makes her way up the ranks, still hoping to find a way to stop Mordremoth. She can't. And when the Call happens, she knows that there's no way she can keep her own mind. The Dragon has its claws in her still. Magister Hestia (self-named after a post-Searing Ascalonian Saint who took up the fire magic that destroyed her people to learn to protect them) locks herself in a High Security vault in the depths of the Priory, so that when she turns-- she cant harm anyone else. (A good thing too -- if she hadn't, the Commander would have found an unfathomably powerful Mordrem Wyvern guarding Trahearne (guarding her brother-- her first friend.)) ...And then the Dragon dies. It takes her ages to regain herself, and longer to start to return to humanoid form. Her co-workers are sympathetic, though they don't know the details of who she was. It's hard for them to help. It ends up being a Lightbringer that helps her-- a Norn named Sigyn with remnants of Jormag's corruption scarring her face that comes to her. She understands, after all, what being corrupted does to you. What others see when they look at you and see that. She's there when it becomes clear that not all of the surviving Mordrem will be accepted back into the Grove. That they can't go home. (That Hestia will never be able to go home.) --

[CLICK] [TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES:  PROJECTOR SHOWS A MORDREM WOMAN SITTING IN A CHAIR. SHE TAPS THE TABLE IDLY WITH CLAWED FINGERS, NOT LOOKING AT THE CAMERA. DESCRIPTION MATCHES WITH THE RECORDS OF THE DECEASED FIRSTBORN WYNNE, NOW MAGISTER HESTIA ] [THE MAGISTER CLICKS A BUTTON, AND A TEXT-TO-SPEECH RECORDING PLAYS]

HESTIA:

It started with an idea. I never gave any thought to what I would do after Mordremoth fell. I never thought we’d win. But we’re here, and I can’t go home. My connection to the Dream is gone. The world thinks I’m dead. The dragon’s corruption remains part of me. And I’m not the only one. The remnants of the Pact and the up and coming Dragon’s Watch have already turned to look at Primordus and Jormag. We unfortunate many have been left in the lurch. Dragon corruption has never had an After. There’s no support for us here. The Exalted, inspired by Glint’s compassion, have been a blessing. They’ve kept watch over the Auric Basin for centuries. They’ve offered us a place to set up base camp. They call it 'Gilded Hollow'. Taffi thinks it’s perfect–though any chance she has to study magic in new places is perfect. Lightbringer Frostseer agrees with me though. This place, this haven– if we can make a home for those who have been displaced and exiled–

I’m not a historian. I don’t know what I am. But helping people, recording their stories– maybe I can figure out what to do next. 

[TRANSCRIBER’S NOTE: THE MAGISTER PAUSES HERE, STARING AT THE RECORDER BEFORE CLICKING OFF THE TEXT-TO SPEECH.]

[CLICK. RECORDING ENDS]

(Later, she will lead Defiant Heart, the guild that protects the settlement of Gilded Hollow, becoming a champion of Aurene and a world renown blacksmith. It'll take time and therapy to get there first.)

[bthump]

What would it be like if GA Griffith and NeoGriff suddenly swapped bodies

Well it'd be a kickass fanfic premise.

NGriff in the Golden Age would be interesting from NGriff's pov because of, let's be real here, all the feelings it would unlock that NGriff would try and eventually, inevitably fail to deny. I think he could play the part of human Griffith relatively well, especially if it's post-Promrose when Guts expects to view Griffith as distant and other. He and Casca might notice something's off, but they'd probably chalk it up to Griffith spending so much time around the nobility or something like that.

But yeah emotionally he'd be fucked lol, and it would be great. I can just imagine him bottling it up and playing the part, going through the motions to keep the past on the correct path until they swap back, but when the second duel comes around he fucks it up and maims Guts instead of losing to him.

Idk how that works with fate or whatever magic sent him into the past, but NGriff's stay there culminating in changing everything in one impulsive very slightly altered sword swing feels so right. Say once the timeline's been ruined they shift back bc that's how mysterious time travel works in fiction. Or yk, NGriff disappears because he just wrote himself out of existence. Or say NGriff knows why it happened and knows it'll only last X amount of time and the 2nd duel was one of the last things in the schedule before returning to the future. Point is, human Griffith returns with a new future laid out.

Human Griffith in NGriff's storyline would also be amazing because his angle is experiencing what it's like to have gained everything he ever wanted at the cost of Guts and the Hawks, and realizing he doesn't want it. But at the same time it's extra complicated bc NGriff did like, create a utopia. Human Griffith's gonna be hanging out in Falconia going 'damn I really followed through here.' Which makes his choice even worse, because he'd be trading a certain roaring success for Guts and much less, if any, success.

Though this could be mitigated a little if human Griffith is more disturbed by NGriff's means of yk, bringing dragons into the world. It could be a good eye-opening revelation of the cost of his dream, beyond his own personal relationships. I don't think he could write off the lives lost to fantasy creatures the way NGriff can.

He would obviously have to come face to face with Guts, see how much Guts hates him now, and be horrified.

And it's even better from Guts' perspective because he goes to confront and kill NGriff and finds the Griffith he's still in love with in his place, and that's just ideal romantic drama. Guts swinging his sword and altering the trajectory to miss him at the last second when he looks into Griffith's eyes and instantly fucking knows. I'd be remiss not to link this amazing fanart of that theoretical moment here btw.

That could also be a revelation for Griffith too - the realization that as much as Guts hates who he became, he loved and still loves him. Like, say Griffith has learned what happened in the Eclipse - Casca's kidnapped and hanging around, maybe he used his god powers to read her mind. (Also human Griff and post Eclipse sane amnesiac Casca would be its own wild can of worms, but I'm not gonna get into that bc that would take too much imagination.) Point is he knows why Guts wants to kill him, thinks Guts is absolutely 1000% justified, probably plans to let him, and so when Guts refrains and like, let's be real here, probably desperately kisses him instead, that's a major wake-up call about the nature of Guts' feelings.

If this is the same fic where they swap back after NGriff fucks up the second duel, it could be a perfect moment for human Griff to reappear in the past, in front of an injured, miserable Guts, and do some confessing. And it would be a perfect moment for NGriff to return, say something ambiguous, and... either kill Guts or let Guts kill him, depending on the fic's vibes and how NGriff's side of the story went. Maybe he can kill Guts with a certain sense of serenity knowing there's a parallel universe out there where they can be happy. Maybe the timeline's about to collapse and he lets Guts kill him because it doesn't matter anymore and it's a moment of spiritual fulfillment and joining. Maybe his emotions have been awoken enough that he wants to die. Maybe his emotions have been awoken enough that he wants to kill Guts for still affecting him. Yk, it's all good here.

Thanks for asking, this was a lot of fun to think about!

[duhragonball]

Dragon Ball GT 25

✨GT Stands for Globose Tiger✨

This is the one where Baby arrives on Earth and confronts Goten.  I thought it was also the one where Baby possesses Goten, because that’s the next story beat, but the episode runs out of time before they can really start fighting.  So what does happen in this episode, then?  Sadly, very little.

As shown above, the GT crew snag their fifth Dragon Ball, but they get chased by a weird egg-shaped tiger when Goku wakes it up.  Then they remember they can all fly, so the chase scene is kind of pointless.  This is just a quick bit to show what the main cast is up to, but it really goes to show how decompressed the early episodes of GT were.  A few months back, Toei would have turned this dumb gag into a two-parter.  The Egg Tiger would get a shitty catchphrase like “Ohh, I’m gonna chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya!”  And that’s how they’d pad out the runtime.

TRUNKS: Oh no!  Goku woke up that round tiger alien! 

PAN: Grampa grampa grampa grampa grampa!

GIRU: Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger!

GOKU: I’m hungry!

EGG TIGER: Ohh, I’m gonna chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya! chase-ya chase-ya chase-ya!

GIRU: Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger!

GOKU: I’m really hungry!

PAN: Grampa grampa grampa grampa grampa grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! grampa grampa grampa grampa! 

Whoa.   Sorry about that.  I kind of....

Yeah, I hate this show so much.

Never mind that shit!  Vegeta shaved his mustache!  This is my first time seeing the gag in Japanese.  In the dub, Vegeta walks into the room and Bulma just says he’s looking good, without going into specifics.  Then she asks Chi-Chi if she notices anything about him, and Chi-Chi plays dumb, and Vegeta shouts “I SHAVED MY MOOS-TAHSH YOU IDIOT!” and leaves in a huff.” 

But in the Japanese version, Bulma compliments him on the new look right off the bat, and Vegeta’s kind of floored by the compliment, until he notices they have company in the room, so he gets flustered over being so emotional in front of guests. 

The rest of it’s the same, with Bulma explaining to Chi-Chi that the reason he cut it was because Bulla thought it looked bad on him. 

Maybe the fans hated the mustache as well?  All I know for sure is that the reason Vegeta had a mustache in the first place was because Akira Toriyama provided character designs for the main cast, basically aging them up five years from their “End of Z“ designs.  So the Vegeta we saw in episode 2 was based on the redesign Toriyama made for this show, and it only lasted for that one appearance. 

But by Episode 25, a lot has changed, and I think Toei realized they were going to be using Vegeta a lot more than they had originally planned, so they must have had second thoughts about his look.  So one way or another, we got the blood-red tank top, black pants, and fingerless gloves.  Wait, they kind of had to ditch the mustache once they put him in all this other stuff, because he’d look too much like a leather daddy if he kept it.  That’s gotta be it.  Those cowards.  We could have had it all...

Ironically, this orange dress Bulma’s wearing in Episode 25 is the first appearance of this look, which was also supplied by Toriyama when GT first got started.  For whatever reason, Toei used a different look for Bulma in Episode 2, and they just now got around to the orange dress.  So who knows?

But the bulk of this episode is taken up by Goten, who’s on a date with some girl named Palace in Satan City.  I’m pretty sure she was called “Valise” in the dub, so I don’t know how they got from one to the other.  Then again, Ceripa got renamed “Fasha” in the dub, so I’m not sure there’s really a process for some of these decisions.  Palace is a frustrating character because she’s only in like two episodes and barely does anything, but she has a cooler design than almost everyone in this show.  

That’s not to say Palace is a cool character.  Her role here is to give Goten something to do, which is pretty weak considering how barely-there Goten is in this franchise.  It’s 2023 and people are still hoping that they’ll do something with Goten.  In GT, he just goes on lots of dates.  I’m not against the lover-boy concept, because it’s a good way to set him apart from Goku and Gohan, but “likes girls” is a pretty thin personality for a male character. 

You could still do something with that.  Send Goten on all these dates, and show us his personality as it contrasts with the variety of women he hangs out with.  But for that to work, you’d pretty much have to give him his own show, and Goten can barely hang onto his spot as a supporting character in this show.  As it is, we see him on one (1) date, and it’s with Palace, whose personality consists of “Doesn’t know what ice cream is” and “Doesn’t know what a hamburger is.”

But her yellow dress is amazing.  They should give that to a better character.

Anyway, Goten’s date is interrupted by Baby, who uses human hosts to wander around Satan City, in search of a Saiyan.  This huge blonde guy, for example, barges into a bank during an armed robbery, and when the lead robber doesn’t know what a Saiyan is, the dude just blows up the whole bank.  Then Mr. Satan tries to confront him, but when he turns out to have super powers, he asks Goten to handle it for him.

Goten tries to back out of this, until Palace gets too close to the possessed human, and Goten has to intervene to save his lady.  Things seem pretty much like they did in Episode 24, except this time Baby can control multiple victims at the same time.  I think he might be jumping from one human to another, moving so quickly that we can’t see it happen, but there are definitely shots where two or three possessed humans act simultaneously, so Baby can’t be inside all of them at once, can he?

The fourth guy does have Baby inside him, though, as Baby emerges to confront Goten face-to-face.  He namedrops Goku, and that’s how Goten finds out that this guy knows his dad, and that’s also how Baby finds out Goten is Goku’s son. As we can see, Baby’s gotten taller and more powerful since his last appearance, and now that he’s found a Saiyan, he doesn’t seem to need to worry about sneaking around like he did on Pital. 

Then he destroys a bunch of real estate in Satan City, and the episode ends with Goten preparing to fight the guy.  So yeah, Episode 26 promises to be fairly eventful, but this episode is mostly just playing for time.

✨Positivity Page✨

I am not saying that this was a good episode, or that this is an improvement over what’s come before.  Still, the change of pace was extremely refreshing, and I’d rather watch three hours of Vegeta shaving or Goten making time than put up with another minute of Pan’s whining or Giru saying “danger!” over and over.

I think it says a lot about GT that Vegeta’s mustache was one of the most enduring elements of the show in the eyes of the fandom, and it only appeared in two episodes.  For that matter, Goten fans have a lot invested in his GT appearances, since this is the only place to find any content featuring Goten as an adult, but his presence in GT is extremely threadbare. 

On the other hand, no one is like “Oh, wow, General Rildo was such a badass!”  or “Who would win if Naturon Shenron fought Oceanus Shenron?”  or “I love it when the robot says “danger” over and over!”  The stuff that GT is actually about doesn’t get much attention at all.  At least, that’s been my perspective over the years. 

Anyway, they should do a spin-off anime where Vegeta shaves for like an hour, and then he has coffee with Goten, who tells him about his latest romantic escapade.  Vegeta pretends to listen, but he’s too enamored with the baby’s-bottom smoothness of his face, and the soothing aroma of the shaving cream and aftershave he put on.

GOTEN: So she was pretty nice and all, but she just would not stop talking about The Great Pumpkin.  And finally I figured out that she wasn’t talking about the Charlie Brown special.  No, she actually worships the Great Pumpkin, and I’m like ‘She’s cute, but is she worth-joining-a-cult cute?’ 

VEGETA: You know, Gohan, women are like a clean shave.  They takes a lot of diligence and care, but when they’re handled properly, they can make your whole life feel special.

GOTEN: I’m Goten.

VEGETA: Who cares?

✨"Good” “Ideas”, Poorly Executed✨

This episode is nothing but concepts lifted from DBZ.  The GT crew getting chased is a clear homage to the shot of the characters fleeing a dinosaur in the opening of Z.  Goten’s date is a lot like Gohan’s date in the Great Saiyaman Saga, except Goten doesn’t have a secret identity to protect, so there’s no tension to it.  Mr. Satan is doing the exact same bit he’s always done, only with less hair.  I was about to say his baldness was a GT exclusive, but it’s not.  He was losing his hair in the last episodes of Z, and GT just took a little more off the top.

It’s kind of telling how this show is already backing off of the handful of things that made it distinctive.  The Grand Tour premise is basically dead.  This show is back on Earth and it won’t be heading into space ever again.  Vegeta had a new look but he’s changed it so he’ll look more recognizable in close-up shots like this one.  Everything about this episode just screams “We’re sorry, everyone!   We’ll be more like DBZ!  Just give us another chance!”  Except it’s all cosmetic.  The storytelling is still the problem.  Changing up the plot and characters doesn’t fix that. 

✨Is this episode worse than “The Roaming Lake”?✨

Yeah, this is worse.  The first, like ten minutes of “The Roaming Lake” is just characters standing around deciding what to do after the World Tournament finals, and most of them just ended up declaring their intention to go home. 

This episode is like eighteen minutes of the same.   Baby blew some shit up, but so what? That was all just buildup for a bigger fight, and they’re making us wait for it.  

Incidentally, yeah, these GT episode are only 18 minutes long?  I had to get screencaps for this one off Crunchyroll, and I noticed that the total runtime is 24 minutes.  Take away the opening and closing songs, and the last episode recap, and you’re left with just 18 minutes of new story.  Which is weird, because:

A) It feels a lot longer, like twice as long.

B) You’d think these shows would be very fast-paced with so little time to work with, but instead they keep looking for ways to drag everything out.

 And maybe Dragon Ball and DBZ were about the same length too, but I seem to remember their episodes being about 22 minutes each.   I should look into that. 

Anyway, if your action/adventure anime has time to show a guy shaving and another guy teaching a girl how to eat ice cream, then you’re doing it wrong.

✨The Blade Braxton Memorial Haiku*✨

Is GT a hit?

Turns out it’s full of shhhhhaving

cream, be nice and clean....

[arlathma-vhenan]

Chapter One - Introduction

Fandom: Dragon Age      Chapter: 1/?   Rating: T Summary: You are the Researcher, sent back in time by a spell to uncover a rebellion. You wake up in the body of a man who has to comply to the law of the First (an arranged marriage between two firstborn sons), but decision is up to you.

Read on AO3 Introduction to the series

Thedas

A distance voice reaching through the darkness:

“You are him!”

A light flashed and before your eyes a triangle standing on one end is drawn with two wave lines crossing it horizontally.

Mentally you drew the symbol when it began to fade, replaced by the dawn of a new day. Your view to the horizon was uninterrupted as you saw the landscape of a desert. Nature underneath your bare feet was soothing, yet you imagined hearing an unlikely sound with every step.

Like walking on a burning ground, you turn around and took a path towards a small settlement bracing the wind across the desert. Tents around a fireplace were decorated with wood carvings on large bars lowered into the ground.

Among the faces of birds and other animals were letters which gave your tribe its name. An outlandish word of a civilisation before you.

Fitzsimmons

The word is carved in small letters on the outline of an eagle’s eyeball.

You watched the carving until you felt a hand touching your shoulder. An elder of your tribe stood behind you, drawing your attention to smoke signals across the desert. A sigh exhaled with the realisation that the day has come you have to leave your tribe.

“I don’t remember, has this been done before?”

The tribe’s elder looked at you and shook his head.

“The shadow leader made it a law to all tribes. A promise of peace for one chosen one to form a union of hearts with another tribe’s chosen. You will leave us today, Max Fitzsimmons, and accept the hand of Carl on this auspicious day. Keeping the peace of our tribe and ensuring our future.”

He touched your shoulder, as they sank lower.

It was time to say goodbye to your tribe and leave your previous life behind you. A group of playing children did not pay attention to the event, while the elders see you off. Waving hands and good wishes followed you as you turned away and let the sand take you to new paths.

 You focused on the smoke signals, when you heard your name and get run over by a young woman. You rolled in the sun and came to rest on your knees, staring in her face. Her dark eyes are filled with tears while she pressed her hand on her chest, over her beating heart.

“I am with you, brother. I won’t leave your side.”

You nodded and your forehead rested against hers as you took in the last moment of home.

[thetoxicgamer]

Nier Automata Anime Release Date is Very, Very Soon

Yes, you read it correctly, Nier Automata's anime premiere has been scheduled for extremely early January 2023. I mean, what better way to start the new year than to binge-watch the television adaptation of the action-adventure game? While we’ve reported on the snippets of the Nier Automata anime before, a trailer released on Christmas day 2022 has finally given us the information we needed: the official release date. The Nier Automata Ver1.1a release date is set for January 7, 2022, and will be available on Hulu and Prime Video, as well as a host of different Japanese streaming sites. All of these are listed here. The trailer shows fan favourite character 2B striding through a smoggy battlefield holding a limp 9S in her arms. “I wonder how long I will continue to fight,” she states (according to Google Translate, don’t sue me), as the music reaches a rather epic crescendo. We see snippets of the game’s first boss battle beautifully transformed into a fluid Japanese-style animation. From the snippets we’ve seen so far, it looks as though the story will play out as it does in-game, but I expect there will be a few twists and turns along the way – this is Yoko Taro we’re talking about, after all. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGpskkA7vrw The Nier Automata anime comes in the wake of highly successful game-inspired TV shows Arcane and Edgerunners, the first of which scooped up award after award, while the second prompted a mass influx of players back to Cyberpunk 2077 following its rocky launch. With Bioware jumping on the bandwagon with Dragon Age: Absolution, I expect that we’ll keep seeing developers transform their playable universes into animated TV shows – and I am living for it. As we draw ever closer to launch date, you can check out our Neir Automata review if you’ve never played the game before. Otherwise, we have a list of the best anime games and the best RPG games to keep you busy while we wait with bated breath for Nier Automata Ver1.1a. Read the full article

[dreadfulsanity]

Of Archdemons, Evanuris and Old Gods

Sometimes I'm rather... slow. Okay. That's nothing new, and I mostly accepted that my brain isn't as... flexible as it used to be. Why it's bothering me now? Well, let me tell you. Grab a seat, have a beverage and listen to my tale. Well, less of a tale and more of thoughts I'm trying to put into a somewhat coherent format.

There is this theory floating around in the Dragon Age sphere. It involves this particular mural. And it roughly goes as follows:

The black space with the golden triangles is the sky.

The large half-circle represents the Fade, and within Black City. If you look long enough, you can see the silhouettes of buildings in the background.

The smaller circle in the middle stands for the Evanuris (14 eyes = 7 Evanuris).

The dotted line around the half-circle stands for the Veil.

And the blobs surrounding it stand for the Archdemons. Four grey blobs for the Archdemons that have been slain so far, three golden blobs for those that haven't.

"But we have already slain five Archdemons," I hear you saying. Yes, that's right. One explanation for this is that Urthemiel's soul/essence can be saved by doing the Dark Ritual. Another one is that the mural was created before the fifth blight. Whatever it is, in the theory, the Archdemons function as seals, locking the Evanuris away.

And here we come to the part were my brain had an issue with it. How would slaying something on this plane of existence have an effect in the Fade? Other than sending a soul/spirit/whatsoever into the Fade. Now I have played through Dragon Age: Origins so many times now that I lost count (646h on record, not counted the runs I did with the box version before I had Origins). And I never thought 'Hm, isn't it weird that there is a beam shooting up to the high heavens when the Archdemon is slain?'

But then it dawned on me. While I was trying to fall asleep. It's always when you're trying to sleep that your brain goes into overdrive. Or when you're on the potty. I wonder what breakthroughs we could have if we tried to fall asleep while taking... I digress. I mean, why would a beam shoot up to the high heavens when slaying an Archdemons? What reasons could there be for that to happen?

And I looked up and saw The seven gates of the Black City shatter, And darkness cloaked both realms.

Canticle of Exaltations

Seven gates to the Black City. Seven seals to lock them shut. And why wouldn't they be on Thedas, in the waking world? I mean, you want those seals to be as hard to reach as possible, right? Especially for those you sealed away. No one has a lock on the inside. Though since all the Evanuris are depicted bald, maybe they wouldn't have hairpins to pick locks with.

We do not know when exactly Solas created the Veil, but it is said that humans don't know a world without it, so we can assume it was before -3100 Ancient. 300 years later, in -2800 Ancient, the "Old Gods" whisper to human Dreamers from Arla... the Golden/Black City, and taught them magic. "Why would the Evanuris teach humans magic," I hear you asking. Because they want out. They don't like being locked away in a corrupted city. So they start to plan a jail-break. And for beings that are immortal, time is irrelevant. I'm sure, when you're immortal, you've learned to be very patient. What are a couple hundred years? Even two millennia?

Which brings us to -395 Ancient, when—according to the Chantry—the most powerful magister lords try to breach the Golden/Black City. While we do know that magisters went into the Fade to breach the Golden City, I don't buy the part where they are cast out by the Maker, and the city turns black. It was already black long before Corypheus and his cohorts tried to pry open the gates. But opening the gates did not work, thanks to the seven seals. And so the magisters are repelled, cast back into the waking world, but now tainted.

Through the taint the Evanuris now create a link between tainted creatures. And what is it that drives every single darkspawn out there? Finding the Archdemon. Corrupting it. And what does the corrupted Archdemon? Attack the waking world, causing death and destruction, and is ultimately killed by the inhabitants of Thedas. One less seal to worry about. And the death and destruction does another thing. I mean, even if all seven seals are destroyed, there is still the matter of the Veil. And we know that areas that have seen a great many battles have a weakened Veil. Therefore, conflict and strife weakens the Veil.

Yes, the Evanuris play the long game here. But they have nothing but time. I just wonder what the taint did to them in all those years. I wouldn't be surprised if they'd lost all their marbles. Can't wait to find out. Because of one thing I am sure. The Veil comes down. Oh, that reminds me...

I'll repeat the image from the beginning, so you don't have to scroll so far. There is some interesting imagery that's coming up again and again.

I want to direct your attention to the half circle containing the Veil, the city and the Evanuris. 

Is is repeated in the fresco of the 2020 trailer, where the Dread Wolf breaks through the barrier. Oh, and...

What's that at the bottom of the map that came with Tevinter Nights?

So, I think there's a barrier around the Black City to keep the taint and the Evanuris in, sealed by whatever the Archdemons are before they become corrupted dragons. And the Veil creates another barrier for good measure. And it's all come crashing down soon. We're in for some shit, and I'm so excited. I said what I've said.

And now I need to stop because my imagination is running rampant and we're going from "theories I at least try to back up" to "wild guesses". If you've read this far, thank you so much, I really appreciate you. If you want more of what's going through my head at any given time, follow me on Mastodon. It's where I post most of my ramblings. I'll read you guys later. Byyyyeeeee! 💋