#wait i made a pun

[realsafari]

god i am such a sucker for cock

[non-plutonian-druid]

look guys i actually did some spirit designs

[ID: the Hargreeves' spirits in the Paranatural au - or at least, the five of them that are kids in this au.

Luther's is an ape that looks like his body from the comics. Diego's is a creature that looks a bit like a small porcupine. Allison's is a large snake with its mouth duct taped shut. Klaus' is a blue raccoon with three eyes and a pink tail, and Viktor's is based off of the White Violin from the comics, except its head transforms into reaching arms. End ID.]

sorry, the ID got REALLY long this time. that's a summary for anyone scrolling, theres a more detailed one under the cut!

[ID: Luther's spirit is labelled First Simian In Space: THE MARTIAN APE. He looks like the ape that supplied Luther's body in the comics, drawn in the paranatural style; blue, with one eye. He is wearing an astronaut helmet and sitting in a coin operated rocket ship that is much too small for it. He has transformed the world around him into a scifi martian landscape; cardboard standups with doors and lockers scribbled on them are the only indication of the real world. Luther is sprawled on the ground staring in shock, while the Martian Ape says "Y'know, you should totally just kill your dad".

Diego's spirit is a very small creature that looks a bit like a porcupine.

Panel 1: Diego holds his spirit in his hands and says, "So, what's your name?". His spirit responds "I am called..."

Panel 2: A caption appears; Projectile Extraordinaire: KRAKEN. The image is in full color, focusing on Kraken, which glowers cutely and shows off her spines.

Panel 3: The same shot as panel one, except Diego now looks very skeptical. He says "..." and then "Why." Kraken responds "It sounded cool."

Allison's spirit is a giant green snake coiled around a tree branch, with a pattern down his back that looks like open mouths.

The first two images are centered on Allison, who is scowling in both. Someone unseen says "It can force people to do things, honey!" and "It's too dangerous to leave you alone with it." and finally, "So we fixed it."

The final image is of the spirit. He is captioned Muzzled Mind Controller: THE RUMOR. His mouth has been duct taped shut. He does not look pleased.

Klaus' spirit is a blue raccoon with dark purple legs and a fluffy striped pink tail. It also has three eyes.

Panel 1: The large colored closeup of Klaus' spirit. It is captioned Mystical Conartist: THE SEANCE.

Panel 2: Klaus asks it "With a name like that, what's your power?" The Seance, its nose just high enough to fit into frame, replies, "Oh, I can sense ghosts"

Panel 3: Klaus looks supremely unimpressed. In the background, a ghost says "Hi" to Allison and Luther, and they say "Oh, hey" back.

Panel 4: Klaus asks, "Seriously?"

Panel 5: The Seance, viewed from above, says "Hey, I can sense them even when they're not visible! Like behind walls and stuff!"

Panel 6: The Seance adds "Also I can float." It is demonstrating, floating about eye level with Klaus and emitting a cloud of cyan spectral energy as it does so. Klaus looks more pleased with this and says "Okay, that one's pretty good."

Viktor's spirit is a Wight, a spirit so warped by rage and pain that it has permanently been changed, its spectral energy has become white, and has gained massive, devastating power. It looks a lot like the design of the White Violin in the comics, but it manifests too many or too few arms from where its head should be.

There are three images of it. In the first, it is kneeling. It has manifested six arms in varying degrees of completeness, and all of them look sad.

In the second, the matter of its head has split into many small pieces that almost look like parts of mouths, save for two clawing hands. It screams, in the Wight spirit language from Paranatural, WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME.

In the third, the largest, its knees buckle as it stands and manifests one reaching hand. It is captioned Violent White: THE WHITE VIOLIN. End ID]

[psychologicalwarclaire]

I just realized that the one year anniversary of Spider's Web With Strings Attached is coming up. The SWSAnniversary, if you will.

August 5th. It was first posted on August 11th, but the actual day I decided to write it, the day I started planning it out, the day I actually started writing was the 5th

So, uh, do with that information what you will

[the-punforgiven]

Ngl I kinda fucking love how open Elden Ring is, the thrill of zipping my ass up to god knows where fresh outta character creation knowing everyone there can kill me in -1 hits just to grab like 2 things and piss the fuck off is something that is tough to replicate in other games

[fruitybashir]

🍌 In your opinion, what’s the funniest joke/reference/pun you’ve made in a fic?

i do still think kris and bojan both forgetting about valentines day was pretty hilarious but ill be honest, i think the most recent fic title is the funniest ive done. at least im having a good laugh about it

like the whole song as a vibe but then especially that line as title bc its so fitting its just. exactly my kinda humour lol

also shoutout to @itskrejsaitsparty bc i was contemplating fic titles til the very last second and was like haha would it be funny if i used that song and then we both simultaneously thought of the same line like--- fate

[cinimuffin]

[diseaseriddencube]

i haven't seen anyone do it but like, alastor x cecil ????? can we make that a ship, like a platonic ship i just think they'd be really good friends like, they can host a radio show together 😍

[north-noire]

ah yes, the golden classics - feddy ber and sping bunne!

[hazbinbargainbin]

[zishuge]

hi! what was gong zishang's pun regarding yue gongzi? is it the bit about the matchmaking god? i watched with english subtitles so subtleties are lost in translation. Thanks in advance!

Yes! The matchmaking god thing. In Chinese mythology the god of matchmaking and love is called 月老 (Yue Lao) - with the characters that mean "Moon" (月 Yue) and "Old" (老 Lao) because he's said to be an old man who lives on the moon.

So when 月公子 (Yue-gongzi) was first introduced I think Gong Zishang first calls him "Yue-gege" (Older Brother Yue) and he says something like "It's possible that I'm much older than your older brother"

Then she says "月公子 (Yue-gongzi) looks even younger than Jin Fan... how could you be old (老 lao)? If you keep insisting that you're old, then I'll have to call you 月老 (Yue Lao)"

It's just... such a dumb pun on his name and also a fantastically stupid pickup line and it made me laugh so much.

[moonverc3x]

hi!! my ocs are going against yours in the oc contest so i wanted to reach out in the askbox to say that i read up on Popstar J and personally? silliest goober ever. i love her!! so no matter who wins the first round, i wanted to let you know J is literally the most loveable orb. If you dont win? see you in the redemption round!!!!! good luck :]

AWUWGHGEHGHEG MY HEART??!?!

aaaahhhhhh good luck to you as well!!! J and Corvin are just guys!! (and Turvia is there too?!) I think Turvia and J would get along well... silliy little villians! tricksters! fools!

and, of course, good luck to everyone! (and, one last little message from J, the star herself:)

@kirbyoctournament

[itwoodbeprefect]

there's a character on nashville whose name is will and his first hit song which he sings over and over in the early seasons is. it's. it's called "what if i was willing". and his name is WILL. and i think out of all the crimes this show committed over six seasons, the very worst one is that they never even once acknowledged that there's an incredibly obvious joke in there

[starpros-sunshine]

There is exactly one good cook in fine and it's Wataru. Tori has never prepared a full meal on his own in his life he has servants to do that. Same goes for Eichi. And while Yuzuru can cook just fine it tastes bland and the main objective isn't to taste good, it's to fill the quotum of nutrition and calories. So unless Yuzuru actually tries to season his food he'll forever be place 2 on the fine fine cook ranking

[the-punforgiven]

Oh I think I'm starting to get the appeal of werewolves now

[notcatherinemorland]

gonna have to bring back ye olde 2013 vent blog in a big way lmao

[silverselfshippingchaos]

welp... he's on the f/o list now!