#wait has he made fun of me speaking in english. i feel like he has

[exactly103]

my russian teacher makes fun of my speaking ability but honestly i think if he heard me talk in english enough he’d be just as annoyed. i just struggle to talk in general #sorry капитан

[sturnlsstuff]

MISSED YOU | chris sturniolo

| ".... god, i hate that i missed you so much"

pairing: dealer!chris x fem!reader

summary: your dealer has been out of town for almost two weeks and after he's finally back, he texts you needing to see you.

warnings; smut, dom!chris, sub!reader, p in v, pet names, praising, unprotected sex, dirty talking, hair pulling, rough sex, car sex, crying, public¿ sex, cursing, mdni

a/n: literally my first fanfic after a looong time so please bear with me, if its bad... you know why. english isnt my first language so sorry for any mistakes! also its a little long 😭 part two here !!

~~~

she laughed at some joke her friend made and took another bite of her pizza. it was late friday afternoon, she and her bestfriends were hanging out, since there was nothing else to do. everything was great, until her phone buzzed. she looks at her screen, immediately smiling when she sees his name. she wasn't even aware that her lips had curved into a smile.

her friends were too busy with their own conversation, so she uses her moment and grabs her phone, reading the message from chris. she hasn't heard from him in over two weeks, she had no clue what he was doing, or where he was. she also didn't want to ask, hating the feeling of being too desperate. and it's not like he owns her any explanation either.

chris: u busy?

she bites her lip, fighting the urge to smile again as she replies back.

y/n: hi to you too

y/n: yeah im out with friends, whats up

chris: having fun?

chris: when u gonna be home ma?

y/n: like in an hour or so

chris: can u hurry up? c'mon kid i miss ya

y/n: you do???

she can't help but genuinely grins this time, her eyes widen a little. did he miss her? or was he just saying that to make her give in? he always knew how to talk to her, to make her going feral over him. but she wanted to believe he means it this time.

chris: hell yeah i do

chris: get ur ass out here

she looks at her friends, that were still yapping about something, that she couldn't care less about right now. she needed to see him. he never said he missed her before.

y/n: then come pick me up, im sending u the address

chris: omw gorgeous

chris is already in his car, when she sends him the address. not being able to see her for over two weeks, made him think. A lot. he has been her drug dealer for over a year now, there was tension between them since the beginning, so it didnt take them long to finally fuck at some party a few months ago. and since then, it's happening every now and then, usually they meet to smoke together, then they end up all over each other.

after a few minutes, he parks the car in front of the pizzeria, finally seeing her. she made a stupid excuse for her friends to leave, not being able to hide her excitement, so they just could assume what was going on.

chris gets out of the car, looking her up and down, licking his lips as she was only wearing a black crop top and baggy camo pants. he personally loved those, especially on her.

he opens the door for her, a smirk playing on his lips. "get in."

she tried her hardest to act casual, but just seeing him after a while, in all black outfit, was enough to make her dizzy. and she could swear he got a haircut. his hair was so much shorter, and she loved it.

she smiles, keeping the eye contact while getting inside the car. he closes the door, his eyes roaming all over her body as she walked towards him. he snaps back to reality, getting to the other side and climbing back into the drivers seat. he was feeling so many things that he couldn't express.

"missed me so bad, you couldn't wait an hour, huh?" she speaks up, putting on the seatbelt and looking over at him, while he starts the car.

she notices the way he looks her up and down, his eyes stopping at her exposed skin a little too long.

"i've missed my favorite customer." he smirks, going back to the eye contact.

"yeah, your favorite customer... right." she says sarcastically, trying her hardest to keep her cool and not to blush under his stare.

he grins before replying, focused on keeping his hands on the wheel instead of her body. it was getting harder with every second. "yeah, the one i always gotta give free stuff to."

"oh, dont act like i force you to do this..." she scoffs, still looking at him. "you know i always want to pay you."

"i know y'do... doesn't mean i will stop givin' it to you for free though."

"see, and that's crazy."

chris rolls his eyes, loving and hating at the same time, how she always had to talk back to him. he's driving, planning to go to her house, but the way she's looking right now, and especially her attitude, is making him crazy. he feels his dick getting harder with every second.

"whatever, ma. i know you secretly like it."

"yeah, sure." she mumbles with sarcastic tone, her eyes still watching him. seeing him driving was one of her favorite things in the world, he always looked so good. she appreciates, that he gives her stuff for free or cuts down her prices, but dealing was his job, he was making money out of it, so she always felt bad when he didnt want her cash. "what made you busy for so long? thought the cops caught or some shit"

chris bites his lip, his eyes glancing over to her for a second, before focusing back on the road. he never felt so desperate like right now, just having her in his car like that...

once he hears her question, he snaps back to reality and smiles. "the cops? please, sweetheart, they can suck my dick."

chris changes his direction, spotting an empty parking lot and he drives there. "i was out of town, had to deal with some business... nothin' to worry about now." he explains, parking and turning off his car, and his stare travels to her, scanning her face and body. "you're so curious...."

she nods, now understanding why he wasn't texting her these past two weeks, she was a bit ashamed 'cause she honestly thought maybe he got bored of her, so she didn't text him either. she still got some weed until yesterday, so she also had no reason to.

"why would you stop here?" she asks, looking at him with a little frown, but once she sees his smirk, the realization hits her. the excitement filling her body, the tension between them so noticeable, it makes her shiver.

he stares at her for a moment, adjusting his pants and then suddenly he unbuckles his seatbelt, sitting back in his seat so there was more space now.

"c'mere."

her eyes travels down on his lap, seeing the noticeable big bulge even through his jeans. she blushes slightly, looking back at him, the smirk still playing on his lips and it makes her weak in her knees.

"chris..." he cuts her off by reaching over and grabbing her chin, tilting her face closer to his.

"y'gonna do what i said, or keep talking back?"

she immediately unbuckles her seatbelt, moving over the center console and she gets into his lap, straddling him. she wasn't gonna act like she didn't miss him too, because, goddamn, she did. she presses herself onto his hard dick, watching him closely, and seeing how desperate and frustrated he was right now. It made her feel a little bit of a power, that she decided to take advantage of.

"now, was that so hard, ma?" he smirks even more, trying to hide his growing need for her, but his hands moves to grip onto her thighs. he felt the urge to touch her all over.

"you know, fifteen more minutes and we would be at my place-"

"you really think, i would wait fifteen fucking minutes, when i havent seen you for two weeks, and you look like that?" he loves the way she looks at him, with such admiration. she was so pretty in his eyes, he never felt this type of desperation for anyone ever before.

"and who's fault is that?" his hands grips her tighter and puts her closer in on his lap, making a little bit of friction, that he so desperately needs. his fingers digging into her skin, while he stares into her eyes.

"shut up for once, yeah?"

"make me." she smirks, challenging him. he doesn't have to hear it twice, loving the attitude she's giving him right now. his hand moves up from her thigh to the back of her neck, pulling her face closer and he kisses her roughly, grabbing her ass with his other hand as he does.

she smiles against his lips, immediately kissing him back with the same intensity, and she grinds down against his clothed dick, feeling her own need growing with every second. she missed the way he kissed her, she missed his lips, his hands all over her, his body against hers. she missed him and she hated to admit that.

she slides her tongue into his mouth, he bites her lip in response and lets her lead the kiss. moving up his hips to feel her more and not being able to hold back, he groans against her lips. he never felt so needy before. he pulls away for a moment to speak, and starts trailing kisses down her neck, squeezing her ass, before his hand moves up, caressing the skin on her exposed stomach.

"god, i hate that i missed you so much."

it slips from his mouth, he doesn't think much about it as he sucks on her skin, but for her it meant everything. she tilts back her head, giving him more space and she grinds against his lap some more, running her hand through his brown hair. he lets out a growl as she grinds down on him, making him even harder and he bucks his hips up again. lifting up his head from her neck his stare finds hers, the noticeable lust in his eyes made her bite her lip to hold back a moan. the smirk coming back to his face once he notices her flushed cheeks.

"what 'bout you, huh, ma? missed me too?"

she closes her eyes, their face so close to each other, it makes their lips brush when she replies him back.

"yeah... i did"

he grins, his hands playing with the waistband of her pants. that's all he needed to know, that she missed him as much as he missed her. even though they both were aware, they should'nt.

"how much, hm?" he unzips her pants, she lifts herself up, gripping his shoulders to balance herself and helps him take them off. then she straddles him again, trying to hold back her smile, but not being able to.

"want me to show you?"

he groans after her words, feeling her wet panties pressing against his hard dick and he bucks up his hips again, being so desperate, that he was ready to beg her. he starts marking her neck again, his hand traveling between her legs, massaging her clit through her underwear. her breath hitches in her throat, she lets out a little whine and grips his hair slightly.

"so wet already... shiiiitttt... all this f'me, huh?" he says against her skin, bitting on it slightly and making her moan. he adds more pressure, circling over her clit. "lift this shit up."

his tone demanding, he wasn't asking. she lifts up her top, revealing her breasts. he looks at her now, his eyes going back and forth between her tits, and her face. "fuck... not wearing a bra? fuckin' slut..."

he licks her hard nipple, then starting sucking on it. her hand tightens in his hair, tilting her head back and she lets out more whimpers. she was supposed to be the one in control this time, she craved it and saw how needy he is, but the way he's touching her, makes her losing her mind. he then pulls her panties to the side, running his fingers through her wet folds and suddenly putting one inside her. not even giving her any time, he just starts pumping in and out, adding another finger after a moment, now stretching her out. he pulls away from her nipple, looking at her face.

"c-chris..." she moans quietly, trying her hardest to keep the eye contact, but struggles to do so. her hands now traveling down his chest and unbuckling his belt.

"yeah, ma? y'like that?" he tries to keep his cool, still working his fingers inside her dripping pussy, curling them and making her whine in response. "look at you... so, fuckin' desperate on my lap. missed my fingers, huh? want some more?"

she desperately nods, squeezing around his fingers, but once he feels that, he pulls them out immediately putting them in his mouth to lick them clean. she whines, pouting her lips when he stops.

"show me how much you missed this dick then."

she bites her lip, unzipping his pants and with his help, she pulls them down to his knees, his boxers following after a second. chris leans his head back against the seat, gripping her hips as she gives him a few strokes before pulling her underwear to the side. she runs her thumb over his tip, collecting the precum and spreading it all over his cock, using it as a lubricant and then she lowers herself slowly on his cock, the movement making them both moan out loud with pleasure. she stays like this for a moment, needing to adjust after these past two weeks without him.

"fuckk...so tight...your pussy was made f'me.." he groans, tightening his grip on her hips and he watches her closely, as she finally starts moving on him. he’s holding himself back from moving up his hips and taking over, trying so hard not to thrust into her. he loves the feeling of her body against his and he’s missed it so much. he needed it, he needed her and he hated that. the feeling just kept growing, making the space in the car feel even smaller.

he pulls her back down into another kiss, this time more sloppy, continuing to move his tongue against hers, tasting her. she kisses him back, starting speeding up her pace and now bouncing on him harder. his dick hitting just all the right spots, making her moan loudly while chris tries to focus on the kiss and not to lose his composure. he wanted to take over, he always did, but the feeling of her riding him like that, has him gripping the seat. he grits his teeth, trying to keep himself together and he knows his patience wont last long. he looks up at her again, his eyes glued to her face.

"fuckkkk, ma.... takin' all of me so well... shit..." he hisses, when she speeds up even more. "so good.... s-so good f'me...."

she grips into his shoulders more, moaning loudly at his praises and she continues moving. chris is in complete ecstasy as she picks the pace up, a feeling like he hasn’t experienced before. there's just something about her on top and taking what she wants, that's got him feeling so many things at once.

“fuck.. just like that” one of his hands grab her ass, giving it a squeeze and then slapping it. "fuckin' slut... you like it? fucking in my car? takin' it just like a little bitch.... yeah? shitttt..."

he moans now not being able to hold back, and he starts thrusting into her. she gasps for air, her eyes closing shut as she tightens around him. "oh, wanna cum, huh? not yet darlin'...." he grips her hips more, his tip hitting her g-spot with every move.

"chris i-"

she cuts herself off with another moan, not being able to think straight. she digs her nails into the back of his neck, her head falling down on his shoulder and he immediately stops. her eyes snap open, she lifts up her head to look at him, a smirk playing on his lips.

"you better don't look away f'me, ma.... wanna see your pretty face y'know? and keep makin' those sexy little sounds...got it?"

she nods, but it's not enough from him as he speaks up again. "use your words baby, c'mon... you aint that fucked out of your mind yet, hm?"

"i got it, just... please..." she whines, moving her hips, wanting to bounce on him again, but he stops her. she pouts. "chrissss......"

"get to the backseat." he demands, after scanning her face for a while. he wanted to give her all the pleasure she deserves. he wasn't even thinking about himself, he couldn't care less about his release. he just needed to make her feel good, making sure no one else can do what he can.

she pulls away from him, now moving over the center console again, struggling a bit but she gets into the backseat. chris obviously smacks her ass as she does, what makes her squeak.

"chris!"

but he just smirks, pulling off his pants and boxers all the way down and throwing it on the passenger seat, so it wasn't in the way. he gets on the back himself, there was little space, but enough to get into his favorite position. chris puts his hand on her back, forcing her to get on her knees and hands on the seat, as he positions himself behind her. chris loves the way he can get her all desperate and begging, so he teases her now. he moves his tip along her folds, making her whine. then he slowly puts it in, but after a few seconds he pulls back again.

"chris...." she whines, knowing he's playing with her now.

"yeah, baby?"

she bites her lip, her face pressing into the seat and she lifts up her hips more. "stop teasing me, please...."

he grins even more, slapping her pussy with his dick and then he suddenly pulls his cock all the way in, making her gasp and scream out of pleasure. the new angle let him hit all of her sweet spots.

"whatever you want, princess." he starts thrusting into her with a very intense and fast pace, going as deep as he could. the car now filled up with her moans and the sounds of skin slapping against each other. he grips her hips tight, keeping her in place. he can feel her squeezing around his cock again, and he lets out a growl. "c'mon.... cum all over me...wanna see you while y'do..."

chris moves one of his hands, grabbing her hair and pulling her head back, having a good view on her face. her mouth wide open, letting out loud moans, her eyes rolling back.

"oh my god!" she cries out, gripping the edge of the seat like her life depended on it and she releases, the wet, squelching sound coming from her now louder. he groans, kissing her neck and whispering into her ear.

"you feel so good... cummin' like that f'me... such a good girl.."

she moans, squeezing around him again, the overstimulation now making her shiver as he keeps going with the crazy pace, not slowing down at all. he lets go of her hair, her head immediately falling onto the seat and he grips by her hips again, making sure she feels him as deep as he wants her to. he growls, being on the edge himself.

"i'm... close.." he mutters, throwing his head back. "gonna fill you up, yeah?"

she whines nodding desperately, but then he smacks her ass giving her a sign to answer verbally.

"shit! yes, fuck, yes chris, please!" she feels tears filling up her eyes from the pleasure, a few of them coming down her cheeks moment later. chris bites his lip, feeling her tightening around him. he moves one of his hands between her legs, now rubbing her clit, while still thrusting hard into her, but his movements getting sloppier. she cries out, her legs trembling and his dick twitches, finally cumming inside her, his warm sticky release filling her up and dripping out of her. he curses under his breath, digging his fingers into her skin, leaving bruises as he does. she feels him cumming, and the overstimulation from him lazily massaging her clit and still hitting her g-spot, makes her finish again. the pressure in her stomach now becoming too much, unable to hold back, she feels the liquid squirts out of her in waves.

his eyes snap open, looking down at her and he growls. he slows down until he eventually stops, after they both ride out their highs, this time not wanting to overstimulate her. looking at the mess she made, he can't help but feel a bit cocky about it.

"shit, ma.... squirtin' all over me, huh? is it how it is now?" he smirks, a little surprised that he made her do that but he couldn't be more proud. he pulls out of her, letting go of her hips and her body immediately falls onto the seat. she's breathing heavily, not being able to reply yet. "that's my fuckin' girl.."

he runs his fingers along her inner thigh, collecting her and his cum and he leans in a bit, covering over her. he looks at her fucked out expression and the smudged mascara on her cheeks. "look at me."

she opens her eyes, her mind blank, body shaking. he puts his fingers into her mouth, she immediately cleans them up, tasting both his and her release on her tongue, making sure she keeps the eye contact with him while she does that.

"you're so hot." he says now kissing the tears on her cheeks away. "took me so well..."

she smiles, seeing his flushed cheeks and messy hair sticking to his forehead. it was her favorite view.

"y'good, kid? don't go all mute on me now.."

"don't call me that...." she mumbles, trying to get her sarcastic attitude back, but she was absolutely spent right now. "i'm fine."

he just grins, gently patting her cheek before he pulls away. she slowly lifts herself up, trying to fight her trembling legs and she sits up now, facing him. not being able to do anything more yet, her glare moving to her legs and the seat she made mess on. she feels her cheeks growing hotter, now suddenly embarrassed and trying to ignore his stare. this never happened to her with him before and she didn't know what he thought about it.

"sorry about... the seats" she mumbles, grimacing.

he raises his eyebrows, now seeing her embarrassment and he doesn't understand why. it was a little surprising but he felt so proud. he already wanted to make her do it all over again. "you f'real? don't even say sorry, ever again."

she's still not so sure, blushing even more as he wipes her cheeks from the smudged mascara and then runs his hand through her hair, trying to fix it a little bit. he smiles softly. "gonna clean this up later, don't you worry 'bout that, okay?"

chris then reaches into the center console for the tissues, grabbing them and spreading her legs with his hands. she watches him closely seeing how he starts just gently cleaning her up. this simple movement makes her feel the heat rising from her cheeks down to her neck, so she just covers her face with her hands shyly. not really being able to understand why is she so embarrassed this time, he grabs her wrists, forcing her hands to move away from her face.

"y'gotta be kiddin' me. don't hide from me, ma." chris mutters. "not when you made such pretty mess in my car."

with a quiet sigh, she lets him take her hands off of her face. she chews on her bottom lip nervously while he goes back to cleaning her up, touching her slightly as she was made from some kind of glass. it was even cute, how he just made sure she was fine. it's not their first rough sex, but this one was definitely more intense and for some reason felt so... different. she had this strange feeling in her chest, just seeing him focused on wiping her legs and how he didn't seem to care about his covered in her release seats. once he's done, he sits beside her, wrapping his hand around her shoulder and pulling her close. she doesn't like the silence, even if before it was never awkward, this one was bothering her as she couldn't stop feeling unfamiliar emotions.

"i ran out, by the way." she suddenly blurts out, making him laugh. there was no way in hell this girl was real.

"yeah? good to know. gonna give y'some more later."

"im paying this time."

"oh, you've paid enough already." she immediately looks up at him, smacking his shoulder and he chuckles in response, pretending to be in pain. "woaaahh, bein' a little brat again, hm?"

"that's not funny, im giving you money." her tone shows no objection, he smirks and nods, knowing he won't take anything from her anyway. they sit like that for a moment, before he speaks up, knowing he will get another hit after that.

"soooo... round two?"

"christopher, i swear to god."

_____________________________

a/n: oh my god this seems sooo long 😭 tell me what yall think, i feel like i kinda fucked up with the whole dealer vibe but lmk please! i honestly enjoyed writing that so who knows..

[onlymexsarah]

Burning Flames III | Eris Vanserra

Pairing: Eris Vanserra x Archeron!reader Summary: Since you became High Fae there were only two things that scared you: your deadly power and your attraction toward the male you should hate most after Tamlin, Eris Vanserra. Warnings: just Eris Vanserra and my english A/n: I would have never imagined that this story could ever be liked by someone, especially for my writing, but you are all so amazing and I thank you for all the sweet comments, they really make my day🫶🏻 if you want to be add at the taglist just ask!

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4

Cold.

Darkness.

Water.

Everywhere around you was cold and dark. You were drowning in what felt like an endless pound of icy water.

You needed to get out.

Something ancient whispered in your ear, What do you need?

Fire. You almost screamed underwater. You wanted to pull away the water, to make it disappear. Give me fire.

The darkness around you almost laughed. I shall give you fire, then. It will make you protect and be protected. To heal, and to hurt. To joy, and to fear.

Then, something inside you exploded, and the whole word turned red.

***

"Why would you make Cassian your curtier just for me to be his babysitter?" You asked confused at Rhysand. "A babysitter who has not experience, by the way."

Cassian protested beside you, but Rhysand only grinned amused. "Because, dear Y/n, Queen Vassa had clearly expressed her wishes to deal with you as our human emissary."

That was true. As soon as the war had been over and the meeting had been going on for days, the human queen had approached you and said that she would consider you their human emissary. She had said that Feyre's story about your time of poverty had made her understand you were the right one for the job.

You hadn't complained. If there was a way you could help the Night Court and the human lands than you would do it blindly.

"We'll have fun." grinned wolfish Cassian at your side.

"I have no interest in telling you how to do your work..." Rhysand said casually. "But, if I may suggest, try not to kill Lucien on sight. He is trying to redeem his mistakes."

You rolled your eyes annoyed. It wasn't that you hated Lucien, but it was just that every time you saw him the memories of that day in Hybern come back in your head. How he had stood there doing nothing, for then declaring that your sister was his mate and pretended to be spared alive because of that. And of course the fact that he had left Tamlin hurting both physically and mentally your sister Feyre, without doing anything there too.

"I'll try my best." You gave Rhysand a fake smile before walking toward Mor, who would winnow you and Cassian to the house where Jurian, Vassa and Lucien lived.

As soon as you arrived in front of the house a strong scent of honey and burned wood hit your nose. Lucien must have just arrived, you thought annoyed. Beside you Mor made a face, declaring that she would not come with you but Rhysand would wait you for your return.

You and Cassian shared a curious look, but said nothing, knowing that Mor must had her reasons.

"Do you think she is fine?" you asked Cassian as soon as she vanished.

Cassian gave her a shrug. "She's Mor. She will speak when she feels ready."

You inclined your head slightly to one side confused. "It's not the first time I hear one of you saying 'they'll speak when they are ready', but sometime people need to be asked, you know?"

Cassian gave you a grin before knocking at the door. "Oh, Y/n. When you live centuries like us you start to prefer privacy more than you think. Sometime having few secrets is good."

You were about to answer when the door opened and Lucien looked at the two of you. "I thought I sensed someone else arriving."

It was stronger than you. You couldn't look at his face without seeing the King of Hybern, the cauldron, and your sisters throwed in it. So you just looked away, following Cassian inside the house where the scent grew stronger.

"You just got there?" asked Cassian casually, as if making small talk.

"No." Lucien said tightly as he lead them through the house. "Eris is here."

Every muscle in you almost froze at his words. Suddenly, you weren't so eager to enter the room and do the emissary. Suddenly, you felt too small. But you noticed that Cassian showed no emotions, even though you knew that deep inside he must be boiling with rage, and so you tried to do the same.

You noticed how Cassian's wings sprawled a bit wider, just enough to slightly cover you from any potential harm. And that harm, you guessed, would be the handsome redhaired male seated on a golden chair beside the fireplace. His legs was elegantly crossed, his clothes were far more finer than the ruined fighting leathers you had last seen him in. Everything about him screamed royalty, and your mind pointed out that your should stop staring.

"Cassian." Eris said with his usual arrogant voice, then his eyes shifted on you and even thought you betrayd nothing, something inside you stirred. "Older Archeron."

Your eyes narrowed. Older Archeron? Was he too full of himself that he thought you weren't important enought to acknowledge you? Surely a change from the day you had healed his wounds and he told you to go to him if you ever needed anything.

You felt Lucien's golden eyes studying the interaction between you, but thankfully a sweet, yet firm, voice took your attention. "Thank goddess you came." said Vassa from your left, making your eyes shift on her. "I thought I had to deal with all this testosterone alone."

A grin was quick to appear on your lips as the human Queen hugged you. "I think you would have handled them just fine." When you broke the hug you gave her a quick, respectful bow and Cassian followed you. "Your Majesty."

You heard Jurian scoffing from the sofa. "It only goes to her head when you call her that."

You watched amused as the two humans in the room started backering, and something about Lucien's behaviour told you that they always did that.

"Did you come with news or orders?" asked Lucien to the two of you while he sat on the sofa beside Jurian.

You had to hold a scoff at his tone. Lucien could fool everyone in the Inner Circle that he was on their side because of Elain, but you would never trust him completely. It was clear where his true alliance lay, mated or not mated.

“We give you orders as our emissary.” Cassian nodded to Jurian and Vassa. “But when you are with your friends, we only give suggestions.” Eris snorted, but Cassian ignored him. "How's the Spring Court."

Lucien’s face revealed nothing of how Tamlin and his court fared. “It’s fine.”

This time, you snorted crossing your arms, and to your surprise Eris did the same. You were almost offended that you had shared the same reaction as him.

Cassian turned toward Eris, annoyed. "What are you doing here?"

You were wondering the same, but you didn't dare to voice it, not really sure if it was safe to talk to him at all.

Eris didn’t so much as shift in his seat. “Several dozen of my soldiers were out on patrol in my lands several days ago and have not reported back. We found no sign of battle. Even my hounds couldn’t track them beyond their last known location.”

Cauldron boils you. You had happily forgotten how his voice seemed to pull some invisible strings all over your body, and you had to mentally slap yourself for even think that.

Vassa said, “Eris came to see if I could think of any reason why his soldiers might have gotten into trouble with humans. His hounds detected strange scents at the site of the abduction. Ones that seemed human, but were … odd, somehow.”

"Odd how?" you asked immediately looking at Vassa. If the humans were concerned then it was your job to keep track of what was happening.

"Odd like human but with something else." Eris answered, making your gaze shift on him. You were ashamed about how you had to stop the shiver that run through your spine as your eyes locked with his. "Like you." he sniffed the air to make a point. "High Fae, with something else."

You felt your cheeks getting warmer, and you hated that everyone was there to see it. So, you decided to shift the attention back on the matter at hand. "You mean like...Made? Like Jurian?" You said pointing to the human General with your chin.

"Not Made." Eris shook slightly his head, his eyes never leaving yours, as if you two were the only people in the room. "But something was off. I think plenty of parties are interested in triggering another war, and this would be the start of it. Though perhaps your court did it. I wouldn’t put it past Rhysand to winnow my soldiers away and plant some mysterious scents to throw us off.”

Cassian flashed him a savage grin. “We’re allies, remember?”

You could suddenly breath when Eris' attention shifted on Cassian and gave him an identical smile. “Always.”

Cassian couldn’t stop himself. “Maybe you made your own soldiers vanish, if they even vanished at all, and are just making this up for the same bullshit reason you just spewed out.”

Eris chuckled, and something inside you stirred. How many times had he been accused of being the villain? How many times people had pointed at him? He seemed so used to it, even when it was clear that he was not behind the disappearence of his soldiers.

Jurian cut in, “There have been tensions amongst the humans regarding your kind. But as far as we know, as far as we’ve heard from Lord Graysen’s forces, the humans here have kept to the old demarcation lines, and have no interest in starting trouble.”

Eris uncrossed his legs, and you had to call all your self control to not stare at him. “I suppose this could be to sow tensions amongst us. To make us eye each other with suspicion. Weaken our bonds.”

"Who would do something so bold?" asked Cassian beside you.

There were only one person who still sought revenge, who still hold a grudge so big that would risk a war.

"Briallyn." you said darkly. Images of the day in Hybern flashed before your eyes, and you stared at the blooming fireplace, hoping to wash them away. "She was the one who demanded for me and my sisters to be put in the Cauldron." A shiver run through your spine. "The Cauldron turned her into a crone. I wouldn't put past her to have some kind of weird power."

"Powers like yours?" asked Jurian watching you carefully.

Your eyes slowly rose to meet his, and you gave at the human a ironic smirk. "No power for me anymore." You lied smoothly, as you had done for the past months. You showed your hands in the air, as to make a point. "When the Cauldron was broken my powers left with him. I'm a normal, boring High Fae now."

If they had rose the sleeves of your dress they would have found burned flesh all over your wrists. The only sign that your power still remained in you, needing to be leashed out as you pushed it down everytime. The burnings were its way to warn you that it could not be contained for much longer.

When your sisters had declared that their powers had gone away, you found the perfect excuse to never use it again. It was punishing you, though. But burning up instead of risking to kill someone you care about seemed the right prize.

"Gone, you say?" Eris' inquiring voice made your blood almost froze. He was the only one who had seen you using your power after the Cauldron had been broken. You had been foolish, driven by some internal desire that was only dangerous and wrong.

You met his eyes, and despite the terror you were feeling inside at the thought that he might calling you out, you rose your chin and showed him nothing of that.

"Pity." he said with his velvet voice. "It would have been curious to see what you would be capable of."

His smirk. His damned smirk. He remembered it perfectly, you could see it in his flickering eyes. And now he was toying with you, seeing how far he could push.

"Tell your father he can sleep sweet dreams." I said matching his smirk. "I won't be humiliating him again any time soon."

"I bet he will." murmured Eris while he brought a finger to his lips.

His movements were so casual, so calculated, but at the same time so sensual. Were you the only one who found him attractive in everything he did? You surely hoped not, otherwise you would need Maja to check on you.

“Send that shadowsinger of yours to track Briallyn,” Jurian ordered, his face grave. “If she’s somehow capable of capturing a unit of Fae soldiers, we need to know how. Swiftly.”

Cassian said to Vassa, “You really think Briallyn would do something like this? Be that blatant? Someone has to be trying to fool us into going after her.”

Apparently the other queens had left Briallyn alone, informed Eris, and that excluded the option of winnowing for the queen.

“You wonder who is capable of making a unit of Fae soldiers across the sea vanish? Who could give Briallyn the power to winnow—or do it for her? Who could aid Briallyn so she’d be bold enough to do such a thing? Look to Koschei.” said Vassa darkly.

Something about the name made even the fire going quiet. As Vassa explained thet Koshei was a Death Lord you couldn't stop yourself but thinking about how you could protect Nesta from them. It was clear that Briallyn wanted revenge on your twin, and if she dared to ask to a Death Lord for help then you should prepare better.

You looked over Cassian, a hint of worry flickered in your gazes, and he silently gestured for the two of you to go away and warn Rhys.

"Thank you, Vassa." You said kindly with a quick bow. "We'll return with more informations."

You did to follow Cassian when a voice stopped you. "Wait..." Lucien said tentately. You watched him over your shoulder raising an eyebrow. "How is she?"

You narrowed your eyes and lifted your chin. "How is your precious friend?"

The words found easily their marks and you could see the moment they hit Lucien as if you had slapped him. The point was clear, as long as he devoted himself to the male who sold you and your sisters, you would never spare him the misery of knowing nothing about Elain.

You walked out of that house without saying another word, and saw Cassian waiting for you with a wolvish grin. "Poor Lucien, having you as sister-in-law must be a nightmare."

You rolled your eyes, used to Cassian's teasing. "Elain doesn't want him. He will never be my brother-in-law, thank the Mother."

"Your sister might be the luckiest of the four of you." A warm, luring voice said behind you. "Lucien had always been a good male. Propably better that any of your mates will ever be."

You scoffed turning around and facing Eris. He was leaning casually against the wall of the house with his usual grin on his face. You hated how the moolight made him look like the sort of dreams that must be kept secrets, but mostly you hated how you noticed those kind of things.

"As far as I am corcened only two of my sisters have a mate, and I would choose Rhysand over Lucien anytime." You challenged him crossing your arms.

A shadow crossed his eyes, but he hide it quickly with an amused face. "I see why Rhysand sent you to babysit the new courtier, you are indeed charming." You heard the mock in his voice, and you wanted to talk back, to annoy him as much as he annoyed you, but he spoke to Cassian next. "What do you know?"

"As little as you." offered Cassian, watching him carefully.

Eris sniffed the night breeze, and smiled. "She couldn't be bothered to come inside to say hello?"

You understood immediately that he was talking about Mor, and something inside you twisted. You felt ashamed. Ashamed that after what he had done to Mor, the one who helped you with your new body, with your new home and new life, you couldn't bring yourself to be repulsed by him, as you should have been.

As Eris proceeded to tell about how his father was helping Briallyn and Koshei, about how he didn't want to reveal anything in front of Vassa and Jurian, but still revealed it to you, you tried hard to find the monster that everyone pictured him to be. To find the selfish, horrible male that no one trusted. But the only thing you saw was a heir who wanted his court to be better, to overthrow a cruel father.

But you were young, the people around you had known him for five hundreds years, surely they would know him better than you could ever do.

The fact that under the cold mask you could see a good male meant nothing. You were imagining it. It was his velvet, seductive voice that made you think those things, that made you believe things that weren't real.

“Stick to fighting battles, General. Leave the ruling to those capable of playing the game.” said lastly Eris to Cassian. Did it make you crazy the fact that despite everything you found him amusing? "And, Little Flame?" you eyes snapped up to met his, the pet name made your eyes widing a little for the surprise. "Careful to whom you share your secrets. While secrecy suits you, lies don't."

Then, he vanished.

taglist: @adventure-awaits13 @blueeclipsepaperstudent @huffleruffplant @azysmate @bia-wayne-west @babypeapoddd @lady-targaryens-world

[disgruntled-detectives]

Some ramble that has been on my mind lately.

I’m a huge fan of John Finnemore’s writing and sketches. If you don’t know who he is, he’s an English comedy writer. He’s born and raised in the UK. And he has a radio sketch show called “John Finnemore’s Souvenir Programme” it’s a hilarious show and I highly recommend it. It’s made me laugh and honestly been a bright spot in dark times.

Occasionally, he has what he calls “meta sketches” where one person from the cast (there are five comedians in the JFSP cast) will address him about something in another sketch or make fun of him or something. And in one sketch, he pokes fun at Christianity. In the following meta-sketch, a cast member asks why he always makes fun of Christianity but not any other religion. And John responds with that Christianity is the religion he knows. He was born and raised in it and while he’s not a Christian, he recognizes how Christianity shapes British culture and always has. And it wouldn’t feel right to make fun of a religion he isn’t part of, and knows nothing about.

Then he says “actually the only other religion I know anything about is Judaism. And actually I’ve been thinking of a sketch idea based on a man I saw in London on a Saturday at a crossing patiently waiting for someone else to press the button so god wouldn’t he cross with him for working. And he’s perfectly right to believe that, but you can’t pretend there isn’t something a little funny about that.” And the sketch moves on.

This is the thing I’ve been thinking of. He said “the religion I know anything about would be Judaism” and then immediately in the *very next sentence* demonstrates a fundamental lack of knowledge about Judaism. In that “god would be cross with him for working” in that one sentence, he demonstrates so *clearly* the cultural Christianity that permeates western culture.

Because mostly…Jews *don’t* (can’t speak for all Jews obviously) believe G-d would be “cross at us” for violating the laws of Shabbat. We follow the laws out of a place of love. Not fear. We follow the laws because we believe they are part of the covenant G-d made with the Jewish people. We don’t believe in divine retribution. Like an orthodox Jewish woman I used to follow when I had TikTok said in a video, “if we break a commandment we don’t believe G-d is gonna strike us down or anything. We just acknowledge that we broke the commandment, say sorry, and then move on and try not to do it again.” And she has answered that question *numerous times* in numerous videos.

And Christians and former Christian’s have demonstrated time and time again that they fundamentally do not understand this. I was raised Christian. Catholic to be exact. And let me tell you, it’s fear. Not love that drives a lot of their rule following. Fear of going to hell and spending eternity being tortured and separated from g-d is a very real thing. They legit have something called “mortal sins” and missing Sunday Mass is one of them.

Because Judaism is a religion of orthopraxy. Not orthodoxy. In Judaism, what you do matters far far more than what you believe. You can be an atheist and an Orthodox Jew. Hell, I don’t eat pork. Do I think G-ds gonna be mad at me for eating bacon? No. Of course not. I don’t even really know if I believe in a G-d like that. I sorta flip flop between agnosticism and like a pantheist view. I don’t eat pork because I am a Jew. And it’s a commandment I chose to take on. Because I love being Jewish. Not out of fear.

Now I’m not saying this to hate on John Finnemore. Like I said. I am a huge fan of his work. I absolutely love Cabin Pressure, and JFSP, and Double Acts and just about anything else he’s written. I’m just saying this because it is clearly demonstrates the cultural Christian lens through which that people here in the west, including former Christian’s and now atheists like JF see the world.

So basically what I’m saying is that just because Judaism was the religion that Christianity sprang from, and you grew up Christian or even just in a Christian country in the west, does not mean that you know anything about us. It’s so easy to think you understand what Judaism is about because you’ve read “the Old Testament” and seen Fiddler on the Roof or something. And yet get even incredibly basic facts about Jewish worldview wrong because you haven’t grasped that Jews see the world completely differently. (Not to mention that 2000 years separate the split from Judaism of Christianity and Judaism developed and evolved on its own ever since. It’s a total and separate religion. But Christians tend to think we’re the exact same we were 2000 years ago. Which is why their minds are *blown* when we say that to us, Jesus is as irrelevant as Thor is. We literally do not care about your special boy. He may have been a Jew, but like…he’s a dude that lived over 2000 yrs ago.)

So basically what I’m saying is that if you are not Jewish, or at least put in serious work to learn about us, from us, you don’t actually know about Judaism like you think you do. Cultural Christianity permeates everything here in the west, and it’s a lot to unpack and unlearn.

[bia-wayne-west]

Mornings and waffles – Clark Kent x Reader

Characters: Clark Kent [Superman], Jon Kent [Superboy], Conner Kent [Superboy] and fem! Reader [You]

Synopsis: You have been married to Clark Kent for 12 years, and you live in the farmhouse in Smallville. You have two children, Jon Kent and Conner Kent. On a sunny morning, her two children jump on the bed to order pancakes and good morning kisses. You couldn't have a more perfect family.

Warnings: Superboys being super cute. N/A: I thought about doing something similar to Batmom but Superman. I always imagined what it would be like to be the mother of two super boys. Hope you like it. I hope you like it and that you feel how cute Superboys are. I'm a Latina girl who doesn't speak fluent English, so I want to apologize for any writing errors you find. Feel free to correct me.

Requests are open waiting for you

MASTERLIST

The sun was shining on the farm.  The light came in through the window, but you didn't bother because you were hugging your husband's huge body.  Clark used to sleep completely clinging to you, so the sun didn't hurt him.

You were about to wake up, but you could have a few more good minutes for you and Superman in bed together.  Well, you planned to stay in bed until you decided to leave, but your children didn't want to contribute to your wish.

You felt two heavy bodies jumping on the bed, on top of you.  Your eyes snapped open, and you sighed wearily when you saw Jon's bright blue eyes staring back at you.  He and Conner were in bed, trying to wake their parents.

“Waffles!”  Jon yelled, jumping on you.

Jonathan was ten and Conner was eighteen, but they still liked to jump into their parents' bed on a Sunday morning to order coffee.  They could just ask Martha or wait for you to wake up, but it was more fun to jump on you.

“Jon it's still five in the morning, go to bed.” You grumbled, running your hand through your youngest son's hair.

“It's time for coffee, Mom.  And the father has to fix the barn again.”  This time it was Conner who spoke.  He was hunched over Clark's body, who kept his eyes closed, was awake, but still didn't open his eyes.

It was hard to get Clark to accept Conner.  At first, he treated the boy with utter contempt and it broke your heart.  There were hours of conversation, and he only accepted his eldest son after having a conversation with Bruce, which made your husband open his mind.

Conner suddenly came into your life, but you can't imagine a complete family without their pretty boy.  It took Clark a few years to accept the clone as a son and call him that, but when he called the boy son for the first time, your heart was full of love.

“And we want waffles.”  Jon said again, sitting up in bed.  He was in his pajamas with a dinosaur design on it and his hair was totally disheveled, and his face was crumpled up from sleep.

“Then let's make waffles.”  You said, giving up.  Their children uttered an exclamation of joy, making a high-five between them.  “There will be waffles for you too, Mr. Kent.”  You whispered in the ear of your husband, who now had his eyes open and smiling at Jon.

“Come on, Jon.  Whoever gets to the table first will get the most coffee.”  Superboy suggested, getting out of bed in the field.  Jon also got up, and the two ran to the kitchen, betting on a race.

You let out a weak moan, hugging your husband again.  He hugged you back, pressing a soft kiss to your neck.

“Let's get up, we have to feed the two beasts.”  Clark joked, taking off the blanket so he could put his feet on the ground.

You smiled, repeating your husband's act and going to the bathroom.  Within minutes, you had washed your face, brushed your teeth, and changed your clothes.

You were already in the kitchen, putting the batter in the machine to turn it into a chocolate waffle.  Jon and Conner already had their mouths covered with so much chocolate, but they still wanted to repeat four more servings.

Martha, your mother-in-law, was helping you make coffee.  She was by his side, frying eggs and bacon.  She smiled at you, with that sweet face that only she had.

“They're very gluttonous.”

You both laughed, and smiled even more when you saw that Jonathan was frowning, probably because you heard his grandmother's comment.

“I only ate seven waffles and three pieces of bacon.  I didn't even eat that much.” He confessed, making a cute pout.

“Okay, so, since you're not eating much, that portion of bacon and eggs goes to your dad.”  You joked, putting the fresh food Martha had just prepared on your husband's plate, who thanked you with a kiss on the cheek.

Conner groaned.  After you and your mother-in-law finished cooking, the two of you joined them for a nice family breakfast.

You laughed at each other, talked about silly topics, and showed how much you loved each other.

“We have a perfect family.”  Clark confessed, running his hand gently over his arm.  “A completely loving and amazing family.” He concluded with a smile when he saw Martha lightly pat Conner's hand gently as he tried to grab one of his grandmother's bacon.

[babyflorencee]

Just Pretending

Part one: The joke

Nerdrry x Popular!Reader

The party thrummed like a broken radio caught between stations, the sound crackling against the walls and buzzing up through the floorboards. The music pulsed through the house, relentlessly, feeling as if it were vibrating through your veins. 

Y/n leaned against the kitchen counter, she could feel the coolness of the granite pressing against her back, but the warmth of the room seemed to wrap around her, making it hard to breathe.

 Luke, her boyfriend, stood beside her, talking to his friends about some latest escapade. His voice was loud, confident, the kind of voice that filled a room without even trying to.

 As Y/n sipped her drink, she overheard snippets of what the cheerleaders were saying, their voices high-pitched with excitement. But she didn't feel like she was there, she felt like a ghost—present but unseen.

“Did you hear what happened with Harry Styles today?” Ally’s voice rang out over the music. “He actually thought he had a chance with Y/n. Like, what was he even thinking?”

Laughter rippled through the group, as Y/n felt her stomach drop. The words hit her like a sharp punch to the gut, leaving her feeling breathless.

She hadn’t realized Harry had even tried to talk to her. But she could picture him—awkward and alone, hunched over, his thick glasses barely hanging on his face as he tried to speak, not meeting anyone's gaze. She could hear his voice in the back of her head, all those times he’d tried to speak and been dismissed without even so much as a glance. The thought of him making a fool of himself in front of everyone made her heart ache. How out of place he must have felt.

She remembered the time when Harry had stumbled over a question in English class, his cheeks burning as the room erupted into laughter. She’d wanted to say something then, but she hadn’t. She couldn’t.

“Honestly, I don’t get it,” Taylor chimed in. “Why would someone like Y/n ever notice someone like him?”

Y/n wanted to argue, wanted to shout that they weren’t better than him. But the words got stuck in her throat, so she just stood there.

She hated hearing them talk about him like this—like he wasn’t a person, but instead, some kind of punchline. Luke then joined in, laughing a little too loudly. “Yeah, she's way out of his league. He's so pathetic.”

Y/n shifted uncomfortably, her fingers tightening around the cup in her hand. She tried to focus on anything else—anything but the words they were saying. Harry wasn’t some joke. He was just... different. And maybe that was why he was always alone, why he looked like he didn’t belong. But that didn’t mean he deserved to be made fun of. It didn’t mean he deserved to feel worthless. He didn’t deserve to feel like he was less than. He didn’t deserve to be cast aside like he was nothing.

“Tell me you’re not going to let him get away with that,” Ally’s voice snapped Y/n out of her thoughts. 

She looked over to see her friends looking at her, waiting for her to respond. But she didn’t. 

“Wait guys, wouldn’t it be hilarious if Y/n, like, pretended to be his friend? Get him to fall for her and make him think he actually has a chance.” Her stomach twisted. It felt wrong—so wrong. 

She couldn’t imagine pretending like she cared about Harry, just to mess with him. He wasn’t some game, some toy to be used and discarded when the fun was over. And yet, here they were, laughing at the idea of him getting hurt. 

Luke’s voice slid in next, low and teasing, as he nudged his elbow into her side. “Yeah, make him feel stupid. It would be hilarious.” 

“I really don’t know about this guys,” she said, her voice quieter than she intended. 

"Come on, Y/n," Luke said, his voice was teasing, but she knew he was challenging her. "It’ll be fun. He won’t even know what hit him." The words curled around her like smoke, suffocating and inescapable.

She thought about Harry, how he was always sitting alone with his face buried in a textbook. Her chest tightened. Was she really going to be a part of this? Could she pretend to like him? Could she hurt him like that? She felt Luke’s hand on her shoulder, it was a gentle but firm grip that made her feel trapped.

Y/n shook her head, her voice trembling. “I don’t think this is a good idea,” she said, barely audible over the pounding music. But Luke’s laugh cut through her hesitation like a knife, and the others followed, leaving her feeling like she had no choice.

 “Oh come on,” he urged again, a little more forcefully this time. “It’s just for fun. Don’t take it so seriously. He’ll get over it. Besides, everyone will think it’s funny.”

She opened her mouth to say something, but the words got stuck. Y/n knew this wasn’t who she wanted to be—someone who played with another person’s feelings. But the pressure, the need to fit in, to be part of the group, pressed down on her. She didn’t want to disappoint her friends.

The room fell quiet as everyone waited for her response. Y/n's mind raced. She could see Harry's face now, the way he’d look when he finds out it was all just a joke. The hurt in his eyes, the look of being humiliated again. She didn’t want to be part of this. But the pressure was there, building with every passing second. If she didn’t play along, she’d be left out. She’d be the outsider of the group. And Harry? Harry would still be seen as the punching bag for the people around him. 

Her heart pounded, a thudding in her ears. She could feel the eyes of her friends on her, waiting for her to make a decision. She knew that it would hurt him. But could she really go against Luke, go against her friends, go against everything she worked so hard to be a part of? 

Y/n opened her mouth to argue, to say no, but her voice faltered. She glanced at her friends, the ache in her chest tightening. “Okay,” she finally whispered, each letter dragging against her tongue. Her hands trembled as she placed the cup on the counter, her stomach churning with guilt. “I’ll do it.”

Her words hung in the air, brittle and sharp, as she swallowed hard, the laughter of her friends fading into the background. She’d crossed a line, and she knew it. But now, there was no going back. She had to do this.

[larluce]

I had an idea for a Post canon merthur AU!!

I don't know if you have seen Sakura Card Captor? Well, there is a character called Yukito that has double personality/two alter egos. One that is a regular human being with sunshine personality called Yukito and the other that is a literal Angel/powerful creature that is cold and merciless called Yue. The interesting thing about this character is that, while Yue is aware that Yukito exists and can access to Yukito's memories, Yukito doesn't have the same privilege. Yukito, as far as he knows, he is just a regular teen student that sometimes has mental gaps.

So I wondered, what if Merlin, due to all the trauma he went through or maybe through a spell he did to himself, splited his personality in two so he could handle the long wait for Arthur's return better? One would be Emrys, the most powerful sorcerer that ever lived that also incarnates the worst aspects of him, basically Dark Merlin in all his glory, and the other one would be a Merlin without his memories, ergo, without all his traumas, his personality would be series 1 innocent Merlin, but this Merlin doesn't have magic (or rather he has it, but is blocked) and he thinks he is a common mortal man.

So one night Arthur finally returns and it's Merlin who finds him when he comes out of the lake (Emrys made sure Merlin always lived close to the lake). Of course, he's startled an somewhat scared but a feeling inside him urges him to help this stranger. The man is wearing a knight armor and talks old english for some reason. (Merlin never thought his extra studies in old english that he took for fun would actually come on handy). The man only says nonesense as he helps him out of the lake and takes him to his home thought. Apparently the stranger firmly believes he is King Arthur and that he is Merlin the wizard. He has to repeat him several times that he isn't, but they do share the name though.

Merlin: (gives Arthur a change of clothes and says in old english) Here. These are the biggest clothes I have. They might fit you and I put some blankets on the couch for you to sleep.

Arthur: (doesn't take the clothes and just stares at him)...

Merlin: (thinking he didn't speak the language correctly) I said-

Arthur: (heartbroken) You really don't remember me, do you?

Merlin: (sighs) No. I don't know you. I'm sorry.

Arthur: (almost desperate) You do! I don't know what they did to you or what happened to this place, but I'm going to figure it out. I promise!

Merlin: (smiles) Sure you will. (Thinks) He must have some mental affliction, poor man. (Says as he leaves the clothes on the couch) I'll get you some hot chocolate. (Makes a move to go to the kitchen, but has a sudden headache and faints)

Arthur: Merlin! (Runs and catches him before he hits the floor, worried) Merlin, are you alright? Please, wake up! Merlin (shakes him)

Emrys: (opens his eyes that are glowing gold) My king (his eyes water) You are back. (Craddles Arthur's face)

So Emrys explains his condition to Arthur and also that 1500 years have passed and there's probably a catastrophy coming their way since Arthur is now back and all. Obviously, it's a lot to process for Arthur and he doesn't take it all well at first, but he calms down and accepts everything eventually. Arthur can't help but notice this version of Merlin,despite crying for him at the beginning, seems void of emotion most of the time.

Emrys does a spell on Arthur so he can speak modern english and tells him he will switch back to being Merlin soon.

Emrys: (serious) You can tell him you were delirious due to almost drowning or that you had some mental affliction. He already believes that anyways.

Arthur: I'm not going to lie to him, Merlin.

Emrys: I'm not Merlin. He IS Merlin and he's not going to believe you are King Arthur.

Arthur: Why can't you stay like this?

Emrys: I'm too dangerous when I'm in control for too long. Merlin is harmless and can actually be your friend.

Arthur: You are my friend!

Emrys: (coldly) No, Arthur. I'm your weapon, your protector at best, but nothing more.

Arthur: I don't believe that!

Merlin: Believe what you want. (Turns his back to Arthur)

Arthur: And I won't lie to him either!

Merlin: Tell him what you want (Eyes glowing, about to switch)

Arthur: Mer-I mean Emrys! (Stops him by holding his arm and Enrys turns to him) When will I see you again?

Emrys: When I'm needed or when you call me. Don't abuse though. Merlin might get suspicious if he has too many mental gaps. (Switchs back to Merlin and faints again)

Arthur: (catches him before he hits the floor) This better not become an habit.

Time goes by. Merlin still believes Arthur is crazy, but at least he speaks english now. Merlin does find strange the Arthur has no document, nor he is register in the sistem apparently. Merlin doesn't have the heart to get this "King Arthur" out of his house though, since he clearly has no where to go so Merlin lets him stay. Not for free of course, he makes Arthur help with the cleaning and stuff and doesn't stand for prat behavior when Arthur acts all kingly.

Arthur gets why Emrys told him this Merlin was his Merlin despite him not having his memories or his magic. He is clumsy, he jokes, he smiles, calls him out when he's being mean, but also is there for him when he needs him. Is the Merlin he knew but more... happy. Without burdens of destiny or traumas of the past.

Meanwhile Emrys just appears when they are investigating or when there is danger coming their way, like a magical creature attack or a car Arthur failed to see when he crossed the street. Emrys never smiles or small talks, he just goes to the point and gets the job done. He is dark, but overall he is... broken.

Arthur heart eaches when he realises... he is the one who took Merlin's light. He was the one who broke him.

And that's all I have for now. I don't know how merthur would get together in this AU. What do you think?

[noxiatoxia]

Hi! Are there any translation quirks regarding Nagito’s illnesses in his final FTE? Are there any references to it outside of his FTE?

Hi! Thank you for the ask! And sorry about the wait.

I assume by quirk you mean that if there's any extra info, or if something was translated differently/weirdly.

Regarding his illness in the final FTE, it is the same. Malignant lymphoma stage 3 with concurrent frontotemporal dementia. 6 months to 1 year life expectancy.

As for direct mentions of the illness outside of the FTE, I don't think so. The closest we get, I think, is this official (but non canon) story between him and Nidai during island mode.

I sadly don't have the Japanese version of the book on hand, and it's far more difficult to find manga online in the original language, so we'll have to settle for this and hope the translation is accurate.

Anyways, he outright says it was more from luck than illness, but I don't think that factors out illness. Especially if he was in the hospital almost daily.

If you just mean stuff regarding evidence for his illness, there's a few. Sorta. It's less outright and more like...it can be related, maybe.

Here's an entry from the SDR2 artbook:

Fair-skin. His skin is so pale that it's probably abnormal*. Don't say stuff like "Toast is a good choice for breakfast", he really should eat some white rice too.

*The word "abnormal" here is 病的, which means "sick of body and/or mind". Can be used to describe somebody who has a quality that is ill/abnormal/strange. Such as having an illness, or acting in a way that is excessive to a degree of abnormality. Obviously here it's being used to say he's so pale, he looks ill.

(By the way, if you can speak Japanese, the SDR2 artbook is a lot of fun. We get many great details such as: Komaeda's favorite food is bread/toast, his fashion sense is "edgy" and "avant-garde", his hood is likely custom-made to be a hardhat (this would explain why it doesn't lay flat in his sprites) and he obsessively cleans his bathroom after using it each time.)

Otherwise, on the topic of his FTD, I had a chat with @windcarvedlyre about some interesting tics in Komaeda's speech. I'll reiterate them here in hopefully a more concise manner.

Specifically, one could perhaps argue these to maybe be because of his FTD. For one, he is breathier and generally talks slower than Naegi. I bring this up as they both have the same voice actress, so it's definitely a deliberate choice Ogata made.

He also trails off a lot in speech. However, I have a hard time quantifying this because many characters not just in Danganronpa but Japanese media in general trail off constantly. I can say I think Komaeda is up there as one of the people who does it more often in SDR2, though.

And I think I've talked about this before but he uses a lot of filler words. I actually want to go into detail about this more. I don't know if I have before.

So, in Japanese...a lot of English learners are taught "uh" and "um" words are えーと etto, あの ano, その sono, ええ eeh, and so forth. This is true, for sure. But they aren't the only filler words. I think they're the most well known because JP to ENG dictionaries will readily tell you they mean "um" "err" etc. But others aren't really touched on in ENG dictionaries.

Specifically in Komaeda's case, he has a tendency to use "excessive" ね and さ particles. These particles are normal in Japanese speech, and reflect specific feelings and emphasis. But like any word, you can use them in a manner that functions more like a filler word.

However, context is important, as always.

I kind of see it like this: the way Komaeda uses ね and さ specifically reminds me of both Saionji and Koizumi's speech patterns combined.

Saionji uses ね a lot, probably as much as or more than Komaeda. In her case though, I wouldn't attribute it as a "filler word". To me, it reads more as a deliberate act to be cutesy/playful/youthful, and makes sense with her character.

Koizumi uses さ a lot very similarly like Komaeda. Strangely enough, the official English translation actually does go out of its way to occasionally translate this particle usage as "like" by her (e.g the line "this is like, really important!"), but not when Komaeda uses it.

Anyways, since these are merely being used as filler words, any sort of filler word fits. "Like" "um" "anyways" "so", etc.

You can make of these as you wish.

[aliyahwritings]

I saw someone request a hispanic!reader and now i wanna know if you'd be open to write a pakistani!reader who's british (totally not me) and rafe has been dating her for some months and they have to meet the parents. i think rafe would make fun of reader about the accent

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH CAUSE IM PAKISTANI SO THIS IS MY FIELD ✊🇵🇰 + also i based the way the parents are on my parents so i hope that's okay?? my mom says "yes" a lot in every phrase even if it doesn't make sense 😭

Rafe had known the day would come eventually—the moment when he would have to face your parents. His girlfriend's parents. But despite weeks of mentally preparing himself, he couldn’t shake the nervous fluttering in his stomach as he stood in front of their house. It was a warm, inviting home, a charming townhouse with ivy climbing the brick walls, nestled in a quiet neighborhood that felt worlds away from his usual chaotic city life.

You squeezed his hand gently, sensing his unease. “You’ll be fine,” you said softly, your voice steady despite the apprehension in your eyes. “They’re not as intimidating as they look. They just… you know, care about who I spend my time with.”

"No, yeah. Just like any parents," he tried to reassure himself.

"Exactly... but South Asians style—but listen, my dad’s tough, but he’s not mean. He just has very high standards.” Your tone turned a little teasing. “And you might need to work on your accent a little. He’ll probably think you’re some football player from the movies.”

“Great,” Rafe muttered under his breath. “I can’t wait.”

You chuckled, nudging him with your shoulder. “Don’t worry, baby. You’ll be fine.”

Before Rafe could protest further, the door swung open, revealing a tall, broad man with a thick black beard tinged with gray at the edges. He was dressed in a button-up shirt and slacks, a sharp contrast to the relaxed vibe of Rafe’s usual wear.

“Rafe,” your father said in a deep, commanding voice. He didn’t smile immediately, his eyes scanning Rafe up and down, but there was an unmistakable glimmer of warmth behind the stern look. “Welcome.”

Rafe took a deep breath, trying to stand up straight and not look too nervous. “Thank you, sir,” he said, shaking his hand firmly.

Your dad nodded once, his gaze still lingering on him for a moment before he turned to you. “How are you, beti?”

You smiled, responding in Urdu. You spoke rapidly, and Rafe caught bits of it—enough to tell it was a question about how you were doing.

“I’m fine, Baba,” you replied, before adding in English, “He asked how I’m doing. I told him I’m fine.”

Rafe raised an eyebrow but said nothing. He’d known your parents were immigrants, but hearing you speak in a language he didn’t fully understand made him realize just how much of your culture was rooted in a language he couldn’t speak fluently.

Your mother appeared from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel. She was a few inches shorter than you, her soft features framed by a loose headscarf. Despite her modest appearance, there was a radiance to her that immediately put your boyfriend at ease.

“Rafe, welcome,” she said with a bright smile, though her English was broken and laced with a thick accent. “Please, come in, come in. Dinner is ready.”

Rafe smiled and stepped inside, still feeling a little out of place but grateful for the warmth in her voice. “Thank you, ma’am,” he said, his nerves slowly starting to settle.

Your mom offered him a warm hug, her embrace surprisingly strong for someone who seemed so gentle. “You are very handsome,” she said, giving him a once-over with approval. “I hope you treat my daughter well.”

Rafe felt the weight of her words, but it wasn’t harsh, just straightforward and motherly. “I’ll do my best,” he promised sincerely.

She nodded, leading you all to the table where the spread was already laid out. The scent of spiced rice, roasted chicken, and fresh naan filled the air, and Rafe couldn’t help but feel a little relieved—at least food was something he could focus on.

You all sat down, your dad sitting at the head of the table, while Rafe found himself beside you, your mother opposite him. The food was delicious, just as usual, and Rafe found himself eating far more than he intended. But as you all chatted about everyday things, it quickly became clear that communication was going to be a bit of a challenge for him.

“So, Rafe,” your dad began, his voice low but clear, “tell me. How long you know my daughter?”

Rafe glanced at you, then back at your dad. “Uh, about six months now. We met at college, and, uh… we just hit it off.”

Your dad studied him, nodding slowly as he chewed his food. You translated the question and Rafe’s answer for your father, but it was clear that he wasn’t letting his guard down just yet. He wasn’t unfriendly, but he was cautious, as any protective father would be.

“What do your parents do, Rafe?” he asked, his tone practical.

Rafe thought for a moment, considering how to explain. “Well, my mom's dead but my dad… runs his own company.” He shifted uncomfortably, feeling the need to prove himself.

Both of your parents whispered "Allah y Rahma," and you had to explain to your boyfriend what it meant, who quickly thanked them.

“So, Rafe,” your mom asked with a smile, “tell me more about your family. You speak, yes?”

Rafe blinked, unsure of what she meant. “I, uh, speak English. I mean, I can’t speak Urdu,” he admitted, though he was already feeling a little embarrassed.

You shot him a look, and before he could even say anything else, you quickly switched into Urdu, explaining to your mother what he meant.

Her eyes softened, though she seemed a little disappointed. “You should learn,” she said in a gentle tone. “It is good for you. You will understand more, yes? Better for your family.”

Rafe felt a pang of guilt, though he knew it wasn’t intentional. “Yeah, I’ve been meaning to. I know it’s important.”

Your dad nodded his approval, though he didn’t say much. You translated your mom's words and Rafe’s response, then turned back to your mother.

“So, Rafe,” your father asked, a small smirk on his lips, “how long do you plan on keeping my daughter around?”

Rafe blinked, caught off guard by the directness of the question. He opened his mouth to respond, but you cut him off.

“Baba! You can’t just ask him that!” you whined.

Rafe laughed nervously. “Well, I plan keeping her for a long time. I mean, I’m not planning on going anywhere.”

Your dad!/ gaze softened just slightly, and he gave Rafe a nod of approval. “Good,” he said simply, his tone firm but somehow warm at the same time. “I think you are good for her.”

As dinner continued, Rafe grew more at ease. His initial nerves had mostly faded, and he even found himself engaging in small talk with your mom about American food, and your dad shared a few stories about his days back in Pakistan. It wasn’t perfect—there were occasional moments where you had to translate for him or explain a cultural reference—but it was real, and Rafe appreciated that.

By the end of the evening, as they said their goodbyes, your dad gave Rafe a firm handshake and a nod of respect. Your mom, ever the welcoming host, pulled him into a warm hug, whispering something in Urdu that you translated for him.

“She says you’re welcome here anytime, as long as you take care of her daughter.”

Rafe grinned, relieved. “I’ll make sure of it.”

As you walked back to the car, Rafe let out a long breath. “Well, that wasn’t so bad, right?”

You grinned up at him. “See? Told you.”

"You were right,” Rafe admitted, grinning. “But you really did have to translate everything, huh?”

You shrugged with a smile. "That's what I get for dating a white man."

INFO ABOUT UPDATES: if you want to be notified about all my fics and updates, follow @aliyahwritings-notifs and turn on notifications!!!

[your-nanas-house]

Cillian wants to make a sex tape to help him out when he is away from you

Love it, thanks for the request!! 🥰💋

Little fun film

◇ Pairing: Cillian Murphy x wife!Reader

◇ Warnings: smut, sex tape, age gap (both adults), kids, domestic shit

◇ Summary: Cillian is quieter than usual and Y/n can't wait to know what he has in mind.

◇ Note: Sorry for the mistakes and the English.

As soon as Y/n walked in she could feel that there was something odd, there was a weird mood in the house just like when her lovely husband wanted to ask her something.

She brushed it off, though, focusing on closing the door while still holding four grocery bags— full with food and things for the kids.

Just when she was about to loose her patience and drop the bags to be able to close the door and take off her shoes, big freckled pale hands reached for them, removing the weight from her easily.

Her y/e/c eyes snapped up while her free hands made a quick motion to free her from her shoes and coat

"Thank you, darling" she hummed as her gaze met her husband's.

Cillian offered a soft smile, leaning closer to steal her a kiss before heading to their kitchen to put down the bags

"Hello, darling. How was your day?" He asked in a soft voice, accepting the unexpected hug from behind— her hands rubbed his clothed belly up to his chest while her breath hit the back of his neck

"Tiring, missed my husband" Y/n quickly replied, pecking his pale skin before putting away the things she had bought.

It took her a couple of minutes, a couple of minutes where Cillian just remained leaned against the counter, watching her almost lost in his own thoughts

"You're awfully quite today, honey. What's on your mind?" Y/n asked, interrupting his reflection

"That's because I have something I need to ask you, love— but we'll need to wait for the kids to go to bed though" Cillian revealed, moving closer to his wife to hug her hips and leave a soft peck on her lips.

Y/n's eyes were entirely on him, a soft smile on her face, a very good poker face that hide her true emotions which were pure excitement— she just nodded, kissing his lips again.

Cillian moved closer, brushing his nose against his wife's as he opened his mouth to ask her what they were going to eat, receiving another quick peck and a happy answer from Y/n

"I have an idea don't worry. Just relax and give me affection and love as I cook, pretty please" she begged cutely, smiling softly while moving to the stove.

The "old" actor smirked and walked over to her, putting his hands on her hips for the second time that evening— speaking with a teasing tone

"Is this enough love? Or do you need more, eh?" He asked, moving his body closer to hers as soon as she whispered in a soft voice

"More"

.

It was around 9pm, the kids were asleep and in their beds. Y/n just made sure of it, collecting the empty glasses of warm milk before heading to her own bedroom, stopping in the kitchen to finish a couple of things first.

She walked in the room, just leaning the door, to get ready for bed— Cillian was already there, comfortable clothes on and his book in his hand since he was waiting for her.

"So....my beautiful wife, do you know what I had in mind for you tonight?" He asked, his voice getting lower while he put down the forgotten book on the nightstand to get up and move closer to his wife— ending up in a sitting position at the edge of the bed, since Y/n kept moving around the room to complete her normal routine

"No, sir" she replied playfully, glancing at him with a soft but amused smile, chuckling at his reply

"Good, that's what makes this so great, love, it's a surprise. I told you I wanted to give you something special tonight didn't I?" Cillian hummed, reaching for her, his face burying in her tummy as soon as he got an hold on her hips and moved her closer to him.

"Now close your eyes, baby" he whispered, standing carefully up to connect their lips as soon as she closed her eyes— his hands, which were previously on her hips, now moved slowly up her body, squeezing her clothed skin before reaching the first buttons of her cute nightshirt— unbuttoning them slowly, his lips leaving soft kisses on her exposed skin.

"I want you to know, love, that tonight, you're my number one priority." Cillian whispered against her skin, moving her body down on the mattress of their bed.

Y/n kept her eyes closed, even when Cillian moved away from her to take something, maybe a condom or lube, she didn't know.

She just opened them when the sexy voice of her husband, whispered in her ear to open them, his irish accent more noticable now.

So she did, she opened her eyes and she completely froze in place, seeing him towering over her half naked body with a camera— seeing her state, Cillian just smiled and put his finger on her lips in a "shh" motion, staring at her with his piercing icy eyes, a naughty smirk on his handsome face

"I believe I have what is called, a treat for you tonight, love".

A treat, Y/n repeated in her head, her eyes moving from him to the camera as if she was asking him a silent question which had surprisingly an answer

"The video I'm going to record of us tonight, will be our own little fun film to watch whenever we need some time for ourselves, love— when I'm out of home for weeks or months because of my job and I need you so bad" he kept murmuring, leaving soft pecks on her neck in an attempt to convince her.

Feeling still her insecurity he met her eyes, running his finger in her hair

"I hope you won't mind, darling, it's just for the two of us and no one else" he reassured Y/n, pecking her lips while waiting for her answer

"I don't know— are you sure, Cill?" she quietly asked, stroking his cheekbones with her thumbs

"Trust me love, you're absolutely gorgeous and any sane man would do anything for you, you're perfect and you should take pride in that." He kissed her neck softly, hiding his excited smile as he added "But yes, I'm sure love, I'm sure."

And this way the tape started, with Cillian teasing Y/n's body, caressing and nibbling at her skin, focusing on her boobs beyond her neck— showering her with compliments.

With Y/n's mouth wrapped around his cock, sucking and swirling her tongue around it just like he liked and getting face fucked by him just like she liked.

With Cillian's mouth on her clit while his hand worked her folds, thrusting inside of her to prepare her tight pussy for his cock.

With Cillian deep balls inside of Y/n's cunt, thrusting and making love to her like he knew how to, holding her hands as her legs kept hugging his pale hips.

With Y/n bouncing on his lenght, showing off her gourgeous body, her breasts bouncing at each bounce just like they did in the missionary position.

With Cillian having a tight hold on Y/n's hips, as he thrusted in her in an almost animalistic but romantic way, taking advantage of the doggy style position to give and reach pleasure.

Ending with Y/n's pussy being filled up by Cillian, who shoot his load deep inside of her and mover the camera to record how it dripped from there.

Taglist:

@gabile18 , @mrsfullbuster500 , @rex-ray , @elizamalfoyy, @eovjjj , @wife-of-magic-monkeys , @jeremiah-va1eska , @gothamchic16, @rabbiteggz , @dieg0brandos-wife , @rottenecstasy , @lazyexcuse , @teh-vampire-bunny , @lobotomy-lover , @slasher-smasher , @sleepycreativewriter , @mrkdvidal1989

[mypoisonedvine]

OMG OMG TWO OF MY FAVORITE WRITERS TOGETHER I CANT BREATHE!!! can i please req a dark eddie x shy innocent girlfriend reader who always keeps to herself and doesn’t talk to anyone (except eddie ofc) bc she has a stutter and has been bullied by jason but she doesn’t tell eddie because she’s afraid of what he’ll do but at lunch when she’s with him and his friends talking jason makes fun of her even making her cry and eddie just loses it! I LOVE YOU!!! srry for rambling😭😍🥰

WE'RE ALSO VERY EXCITED THAT WE'RE TOGETHER and we also can't breathe cause we keep laughing at stupid tiktoks lmaooo

just a heads up, I know you said dark eddie in the fic but it wasn't giving dark to me so I wrote it more traditional, I hope you don't mind. I was gonna have bex do this one but we realized it's a lot like their fic mighty protector so I decided to try my hand at it instead!

warnings: bullying, fluff, jason sucks

When you first transferred here, everyone just thought you were silent; that was what you wanted, actually, but it never lasted long enough. It was only a couple of weeks before you had to say something in front of them, and the longer you waited to speak, the more anxious you were to finally break the silence-- and anxiety was what made your stammer show up in the first place.

In those weeks of silence, Eddie had found a way to fall for you without getting to talk to you at all. Amazingly, even after you humiliated yourself in front of the entire English class and became the laughingstock of Hawkins High, he still asked you out; you rejected him the first time, actually, convinced it was a joke. Then, when you figured out it wasn't a joke, you rejected him again because you were too nervous to say yes.

Technically, you never said yes to that first date... he showed up at your house, with flowers and a blanket and a packed picnic basket, and you joined him on your own front lawn. And yes, he made you stammer-- and blush, and laugh. From that day on, you had a permanent seat at the Hellfire table at lunch, with Eddie's arm draped over your shoulders.

Of course, not every day could be perfection. There was still Jason.

"Hey, freaks," Jason greeted you all as he walked by, looking incredibly proud of that incredibly low-hanging fruit.

"Keep moving, shitstain," Dustin called back with a roll of his eyes.

"That's rich coming from you, freshman-- did you just get out of diapers or what?" Jason retorted.

For some reason, that really pissed you off, probably because you could remember being new here too. You knew you shouldn't say anything-- you hardly ever did, knowing what would happen if you opened your mouth-- but for once you wanted to speak up for something you cared about. Or, someone. You put all your concentration into the words on your tongue, clenching your fists and praying to any god that would listen to just. not. stutter.

"B-b-back off!" you blurted out. The whole table, and Jason's crew of jocks, went silent. Then, they started laughing.

Your face heated up and your eyes watered as you looked down. "Nice one, d-d-d-d-dork!" Jason imitated with a loud cackle. Dustin and Mike looked guilty, like it was somehow their fault; Eddie started to get up out of his seat at the table, but you squeezed his shoulder.

"D-don't," you whispered to Eddie. "He's j-j-just trying t-to get you in t-trouble. L...Lll--"

You were gonna say 'leave him alone', but 'L's were the hardest. You didn't stammer on this, specifically, but you got... stuck. And you hated it most of all, it made you feel like a complete lllllloser.

"Oh, look-- I bet she's whispering sweet nothings in his ear," Jason noticed you talking to your boyfriend, putting on a mocking impression with a high-pitched voice as he continued: "D-d-d-do me, Munson!"

A hand on his shoulder wasn't nearly enough to stop Eddie after that; he all but leapt out of his seat and pounced on Jason, taking him to the ground.

He got a few hits in, but it was only a few seconds before Jason's douche army was all over him; honestly, they would've probably really hurt him if there hadn't been teachers nearby to break it up.

The other thing about teachers being nearby, though, is that they saw Eddie technically 'start it.' Of course, they'd never give detention to a basketball star like Carver, and they were always looking for excuses to bust the stoner-slash-super-senior.

You tried to sweeten the deal, though, as repayment for him getting himself detention to defend your honor: you wrote him a note that you paid another delinquent to smuggle in to him.

Hey Ed,

I know I should say this to you in person, but I wanted it to be perfect, no stutters.

I love you.

~

Your heart was already racing as you waited for him to be released from detention; when you saw him burst through the front doors and come bounding towards you, you stood up from where you'd been sitting on the steps outside.

"My-- my poor b-boyfriend," you cooed as he wrapped you in a bear hug and kissed the top of your head.

"Didn't miss me too much while I was incarcerated, did you?" he smirked.

"D-d-desperately," you replied. "D-did you... get my note?"

He smiled. "Yeah."

You pouted a little, getting nervous. "D-do you have... anything to... say t-to it? I m-mean, what I said..."

"I won't respond to what you said until you say it," he insisted.

"Eddie!" you whined.

"C'mon, princess, loud and proud," he demanded.

"B-but I wanted it to be p-p-perfect!" you complained, your heart racing as you just knew you would mess it up if you tried to say it right to his face like this. Shutting your eyes, you took a deep breath; praying didn't work last time, so you just said it a thousand times in your head like you wanted it to come out: I love you Eddie, I love you Eddie, I love you-- "I llllllove you, Eddie."

You cringed as you heard your impediment come through, but then you softened when you felt Eddie's lips press to yours. Smiling into it, you wrapped your arms around his neck and embraced him. "Sounded perfect to me, princess," he whispered. "I love you, too."

[chuplayswithfire]

Izzy Arc Thoughts, the post!

Having now watched the three episodes three times over (some of them more than that shhhhh), I still have a BUNCH of thoughts about the rest of the crew I want to percolate on, but I had some thoughts on Izzy that I finally feel confident in, as to what's going on in with his character since the end of season 1, and especially the arc he has between Impossible Birds and The Innkeeper.

Being upfront: I wasn't sure what kind of arc the show would do with Izzy and we still obviously don't know the full scope of it, as we have five more episodes to go, but it's definitely been intriguing in a way I didn't anticipate. I figured Izzy would continue on with his antagonistic role, and he still might, but it seems like D Jenks is having fun letting Con have a role with more emotional nuance than in season one, and seeing as that role has an impact on everyone else, I wanted to share my thoughts on what I think is going on with him in the episodes that we've seen so far. I also wanted to start my in depth analysis with a character I don't care about nearly as much (being honest!) as I do the rest of the crew, but who also has a huge impact on two characters I do care very much about, Ed and Stede. I'm planning to analyze Ed and Stede in each episode before we get eps 4 and 5!

This is a long post! It features many quotes directly , transcribed by me and taken from the captions by Max. I used a read more because the whole thing is over 6k in length and analyzes the dynamic presented between Izzy and Ed and Izzy and Stede presented in episodes 1-3 of season 2 of Our Flag Means Death. If the read more doesn't work, that is not on me, sorry.

Alright, so recap: when we left Izzy, he had lashed out at Ed for the person he was choosing to become and the manner in which he was expressing himself and his feelings - the blanket fort, the binging sweets, the singing for the crew, the sharing his feelings and asking to be called Edward, the encouraging a talent show, and then, the cleaning up and comfortably wearing a colorful printed robe of nice, soft fabric. (Quotes: "I should have let the English kill you. This, whatever it is that you've become... is a fate worse than death." "(growled) No. This, this is Blackbeard. Not some (breath) namby-pamby in a silk gown, pining for his boyfriend.”) When these insults get the aggressive reaction from Ed that Izzy associates with the version of Ed he prefers, he encourages him with a smile, hand cupping Ed's cheek, and choking out "There he is." Ed shoves his hand away, backing away with a closed off expression, and Izzy's smile dies and he closes the distance between them. He states what he wants from Ed, makes a threat, and walks away without waiting for a response. (Quote: "Blackbeard is my captain. I serve Blackbeard. Not Edward. Edward better watch his fuckin' step.”)

The next time we see Izzy, Ed has donned his leathers, made his face up with dark make up to look more fierce, and is cutting off Izzy's pink toe and feeding it to him. We know from episode 9 that cutting off toes and feeding it to people was a classic Blackbeard move. For Izzy, this is several things: 1) confirmation that Blackbeard is back, the one who would never let a threat stand and does a good maim 2) a punishment for said threat (Quote: "Threaten me again, ever... I'll feed you the rest. Understand?" "Y-Yes, Blackbeard.") 3) a confirmation that he has his boss back, that whatever Stede has done to his boss' brain is over.

We get confirmation of that third point when Izzy speaks with the crew as they're getting rid of Stede's books and possessions - "Blackbeard is himself again," with a broad smile. Later, we see Izzy abandon the crew on a small island, presumably on Ed's direct orders, as he waves goodbye to Bonnet's playthings - them - as they depart. Izzy has a gun as he stands beside Ed, and they're watching as Frenchie finishes the new flag and hoists it.

That's where we left Izzy in Season 1: standing besides Ed as Blackbird returns to being Blackbeard for a brand new era of being Blackbeard, greatest pirate who ever lived, terror of the seas.

And when we return to the show, that's kind of what we get. Edward is being Blackbeard and Blackbeard is the terror of the seas, a Wanted Poster with so many crimes they're covering both sides of the poster (and yeah some of them are very silly, what midwifery was Ed up to, exactly-), and yet, Izzy is not happy when we see him.

What I think the show works to establish in episode 1 is that what Izzy wanted back was the man he saw as the old Blackbeard, who wasn't afflicted by these feelings of love or softness or "weakness", which he views as something that Stede Bonnet inflicted upon Edward. We know that, because it's how he phrased it to Chauncey - that "[Stede] had done something to [his] boss's brain". He seemed to view these feelings as something akin to an infection from Stede, that was corrupting the Blackbeard he knew and respected to something less than. Izzy wanted the old Blackbeard back and he thought that when Ed took his toe and fed it to him, said he'd killed Lucius, all that I recapped, that he'd gotten just that. A return to his preferred normal, where everything makes sense exactly as he thinks it should. Ed back to normal, it's Blackbeard time, getting rid of the dead weight and all that.

Except that's not what he's gotten at all, and I don't think Izzy had fully grasped why prior to episode 1. He has suspicions, of course, but it takes him a while to build to a confrontation about it.

Because see, Ed switched from healthier coping mechanisms like crying, eating sweets, creative outlets, and talking to people about his feelings to much more acceptably pirate means of coping with his feelings - violence in the form of raids and drugs (rhino horn, which thought people joke about it being an aphrodisiac, has a variety of believed medical uses in Vietnamese medicine, treating ailments including hangovers, fever, gout and potentially terminal illnesses, like cancer or stroke). Raids and drug use should be totally acceptable means of managing your feelings as a pirate, except that Ed is going too far with them, pushing the crew to the breaking point and beyond. They're raiding every day, they're not taking breaks, they're not having days off, they're chasing down ships as fast as they can take them down and now they're going to be throwing away loot. Izzy is realizing that actually he has not gotten the Blackbeard he wanted and things are not great. He's also lost at least two more toes.

He and Ed have an early exchange - Izzy looking sickly, skin sallow, what appears to be hair dye or make up trickling from his hairline, Ed prepping and snorting rhino horn like it's cocaine:

Izzy: "The crew are lookin' a tad worse for wear.” Ed: "Did everyone get cake?" Izzy: "Yeah, they got cake." Ed: "Well they're, they're welcome to have some rhino horn. Just ground up a fresh batch." (snorts rhino horn) "Oh fuck! You want some?" Izzy: "No, not right now, no." Ed: "Well then, get back to work ya fuckin' lightweight!" [cut to Izzy among the crew] Ed voiceover: "Can't do the job, someone else will."

Throughout this scene, Izzy looks increasingly distressed as Ed does drugs - he looks his most distressed during the voice over however, his jaw flexing, his eyes watery.

This is what appears to have shaken him the most - the idea that he's replaceable, that Ed can and would get rid of him in favor of someone else. It's obviously incredibly distressing to Izzy, in a way that I genuinely don't think the loss of his toes was. Izzy clearly values his relationship with Edward - while in season 1 he definitely wanted a promotion and liked the idea of authority, of being captain, the fact that he was swiftly mutinied and nearly murdered seemed to put a kabosh on his ambitions, and reoriented him to staying at Ed's side. We know that Izzy at least believes that loyalty is important - we know that he thinks he's acting from loyalty when he tries to make Ed watch as his boyfriend (in Izzy's words) is murdered.

Izzy values his position with Blackbeard. He serves Blackbeard, respects him, was honored to work for a legend. And while this is supposition, he seems to have considered himself and Edward as having a close, intimate relationship that did not require words or confessions or honest expression of feeling, this kind of bond where words aren't necessary, because they're tough, manly men who don't need to express their feelings.

But.

Then we get this line. Then we get, "can't do the job, someone else will." Seven words, and they shake Izzy to his core, make him finally start questioning his until then unquestioned belief in the ways of the world and his relationship with Edward. It shakes him enough that he actually breaks in front of the crew, in a scene that's incredibly funny, but also leads to them extending him some genuinely unearned compassion, as they question the healthiness of his relationship with Blackbeard - even as Izzy is finally questioning if he has a relationship with Blackbeard.

Following his breakdown, Izzy has the crew bring the treasure above deck, but doesn't go through with making them throw it overboard. Instead, he takes those new doubts and brings them to Ed, pushing for a conversation where he is clearly for the first time in their working relationship expressing his thoughts on said relationship in word form.

Izzy: "The crew are refusing to part with any treasure." Ed: "Why?" Izzy: "Because it's fuckin' treasure." Ed: "Not good enough. (stops toying with knife, slides it in Izzy's direction.) And that's another toe. Take your boot off." (stands from seated position, walks over to Izzy.) Izzy: (starts by looking down at the ground, then slowly raises gaze to Ed's face as he speaks.) "Who am I to you?" Ed: “...What?” Izzy: “We’ve worked together for years. (sniff) You know me better than anyone has ever known me, and I daresay the same is true for me about you.” (a musical beat plays. Izzy lowers his eyes from Ed’s face, looking in the middle distance.) Izzy: I have (several second long pause) love for you, Edward.” Ed: (starting as Izzy is speaking, right after the word love) “Oh, come on.” (walks away from Izzy, circling around him.) Izzy: I’m worried about you. We all are. The atmosphere on this ship is completely poisoned.” (pause) “But if we could all just maybe (pause, swallow, visibly struggling with words) talk it through.” (musical beat) Ed: (slowly looks up) “As a crew?” Izzy: (face falls subtly, taking on a starker look of upset)

The scene transitions away, but let’s really dig into all of this for a second, because this is crucial. This is Izzy going from matters between us are unspoken but profound to I have doubts and I am verbalizing my thoughts in the hope that they will be assuaged. Izzy is expressing aloud his thoughts on their relationship for the first time, because as Izzy puts it, he thought he knew Edward better than anyone. He thought he understood him better than anyone else alive. Now, we know that Izzy doesn’t understand Edward already - we’ve known that he doesn’t actually see the person Edward all along, but this was made especially clear in episode 6, where his voiceover notes that he is “starting to suspect that Edward has no intention of ending Stede Bonnet’s life”, at a point in time when Ivan and Fang are confident the plan is off and everyone else seems pretty clear there’s a co-captaining effect going on.

The point is that all this time, Izzy has been acting from a place of assuming he knows Edward best of anyone in the world, that he understands him, that he can follow what’s going on with him and that they are intimately bound together, in this deep and unspoken love for each other that doesn’t have to be said allowed, but only has to exist, unacknowledged but deeply felt. 

But then Ed said that he could be replaced. Then Ed said that he could find someone else to do Izzy’s job. 

And this introduced doubt into Izzy’s mind, for the first time. This is what made Izzy verbalize all these things - what made him ask who he is to Ed, what made him state that he has love for Ed, that he worries for Ed, that he and Ed understand each other better than anyone else… because now he has to say them aloud, because he has to be reassured that these things are true. 

That he is someone important to Ed. That Ed has love for Izzy and knows that Izzy has love for Ed. That Ed understands Izzy, that Ed knows that Izzy understands Ed. For years, he has thought that he and Ed understood each other in this profound way, that they alone truly knew the other, and he has to question if that’s true. 

He’s being vulnerable, in a way vaguely akin to the vulnerability Ed offered in episode 10, and it clearly doesn’t land. He wants reassurance that this deep and profound love and intimacy he was so sure was there, is real, and Ed can’t give him that reassurance because it’s not true. Not in the way Izzy was so sure it was. Not in the way he ruined Ed’s life to believe. 

Izzy finally decides to put himself out there, and all that Ed gets out of it is the echo of Stede Bonnet, and it makes Izzy’s face fall like a rock. There’s the answer he didn’t want: the relationship he believed he had with Ed is not there, and Ed is still, utterly, truly, fixed in his feelings for Stede Bonnet. 

(and like just to clarify, I really don’t feel bad for Izzy here - he doesn’t have the relationship he wants with Ed because he’s never tried to really understand Ed, or listen to him, and he isn’t what Ed wants in a partner, but, objectively, Izzy does make himself vulnerable here, and he’s shot down, because Ed just doesn’t return his feelings)

Which leads us into the continuing scene. Ed goes to confront the crew about the atmosphere of the ship being poisoned, which everyone denies at gun point, leading Ed to shoving the gun under his chin and having a little conversation with himself, unsettling everyone around. 

Ed: “I know who we should ask, ol’ Blackbeard. Hello mate. You think the vibe on the ship is poisoned? I don’t know, Blackbeard. Maybe a little toxic sometimes. Maybe it’s a bit uncomfortable sometimes. You do make the crew a little bit uncomfortable sometimes. They think you’re crazy. Well, I’m not crazy. I don’t feel crazy. I feel pretty fucking good actually.” (the camera is focusing on the faces of all the crew as he gives this monologue, gun still cocked under his chin.) Izzy: “Fucking End!” (Screamed at Ed’s back) Ed: (slowly turns to Izzy.) Crew: (Fang looking shocked and saddened. Frenchie shakes his head very minutely, looking at Izzy.) Izzy: “The atmosphere on this ship is (word drawn out) fucked.” (working his jaw, looking down and to the side as he says this.) “Everyone knows why.” Ed: (nods once, sets his chin, walks forward.) “Well I don’t. Enlighten me.” Izzy: (smiling with mouth shut, suppressing a laugh. Shrugs.) Your feelings for Stede fuckin’ Bonnet.” Ed: (Nods as soon as Izzy says Stede’s name. Shoots him in the leg.) Izzy: (cries out in pain drops, clutching his knee.) Ed: “Frenchie.” Frenchie: “Yes?” Ed: “Congratulations, you are now first mate.” Frenchie: “Oh, no. I don’t, I don’t  think I’m qualified.” Ed: “‘course you are mate. You can start by cleaning up that mess.” (tilts head towards Izzy. Turns to rest of crew, onlooking.) “And the rest of you, you throw this shit overboard and get suited up.” (claps twice, turns away.) “We’ve got a record to break.” Izzy: (still groaning in pain.)

So that was a lot. 

Izzy has realized, over the course of this episode, that his relationship with Ed is not what he thought it was, is not what he wants it to be, and that Ed is still and probably always will be, in love with Stede fuckin’ Bonnet. This is why Izzy decides to say what he believes to be true - that the atmosphere is fucked because of Ed’s feelings for Stede. It’s important that we know this is not actually true - while Ed being ghosted by Stede did start his spiral, Ed was able to stop that spiral with the help of community and reaching for healthy coping mechanisms. Ed spiraled again after Izzy intervened, insulting, threatening, and demeaning him as discussed in the recap, and the spiral isn’t about his romantic feelings - it’s about, as s2e3 The Innkeeper firmly establishes, his feeling fundamentally unloveable and monstrous. Throughout s2e1, Ed is clearly denying the crew days off and meaningful rest out of pursuit of as many raids as possible. He’s trying not to touch the ground, flying high both via drugs and adrenaline, and his exchange with Frenchie at the end of the impossible makes it clear he doesn’t want to stop. 

It’s also very important, that throughout this entire thing, the only crew member Ed actually hurts is Izzy, who doesn’t actually object to losing his toes. Now, I’m on record for being one of the many people who think Izzy is actually glad that the toe scene happens - I don’t think he actually especially wanted to lose his toes, but, he was glad to get back the Blackbeard who would cut off toes, and I do think he felt there was a certain intimacy in being the only one experiencing violence. Izzy is a masochist and has previously expressed delight in being the subject of violence - was very happy to be choked by Ed in s1ep10 - so while this is not safe or sane, I do think it’s consensual, in the sense that Izzy thinks this is part of their mutual love, their unspoken but deep and crucially intimate togetherness that leads them to know each other on the deepest level. 

And then Ed says he can be replaced. And then Ed makes it clear that even when Izzy is emotionally vulnerable, Ed’s heart is with Stede. And Izzy realizes, he doesn’t have that place with Edward that he thought he did. He doesn’t have that special relationship. This is not intimacy, for Ed. And Ed shooting him and turning away isn’t even the final nail in that door. 

Because, in s2e2, Izzy is still alive. The crew has hidden him in the walls and are trying to preserve his life, even as Izzy screams for them to kill him and calls them cowards for not doing so. The crew is gathering medicine, preparing an amputation, figuring out what to do with Izzy to try and keep him alive, and Izzy wants them to kill him. (Quote: “Kill me you fucking cowards! Kill me -”)

I would say it’s because he’s realized the relationship he devoted his life too and considered sacred, the relationship he considers most valuable… is not that to the man he loves. Ed replaced him and pirate code says the first mate should kill him. The first mate (Frenchie) refuses to kill him. Frenchie is not much for that, and neither is JIm. Both of them, having experienced a better life and place of work when Stede was captain and Ed was their co-captain, are trying to preserve Izzy’s life the best they can. Jim especially clings to the memory of when life meant something on this ship, even Izzy’s life. 

Which - this makes sense coming from Jim, and I think it’s why they chose Jim, because Jim wasn’t present for Izzy being captain or the mutiny. Jim has the least complicated relationship with Izzy aside from Fang, who is notably not present in any of the scenes to do with rescuing Izzy, despite having been clearly shocked and appalled that Izzy was shot. 

Izzy, is not thrilled to be being kept alive, but the fact that Izzy is kept alive, means that Izzy has to process his feelings - and face Ed again, who, having shot Izzy, mourned and sobbed, has woken up, cleaned himself up, cleaned his space out, and decided to seek death. 

From Izzy. 

This, I think, is the second most crucial moment in Izzy’s arc and transition, because Izzy thought he was someone of incredible importance to Ed, and he also thought that he knew and understood Ed better than anyone, and that Ed crucially, understood him just as well. He thought that even without any emotional honesty or vulnerability, they knew each other more than anyone else possibly could. 

He thinks that Ed knows him. 

And Ed comes to him, and they have the following exchange:

Ed: “Morning.” Izzy: “My leg?” (looking down his body.) Ed: (laughing) “Yeah. Oh, no, that’s gone now. Up in Leg Heaven.” (sets the smelling salts down, turns to look down at Izzy.) Izzy: (looks up at Ed.) “Have you come to take the other one?” Ed: “I think one’s quite enough. I just popped down to say a proper goodbye.” (reaches behind him, draws gun. Izzy: (watches the gun, looks down from Ed’s face to gun and back as Ed cocks and loads it.) Ed: (looking at the gun, not Izzy.) “Had a dream about you last night.” (flips gun to offer the handle to Izzy.) “Take it.” Izzy: “Oh, fuck off. Fuck off. Fuck off.” (slaps at Ed’s hand, looking away from Ed.) Ed: “Hold it! Hold it.” (they are speaking over each other. Gets the gun in Izzy’s hand, directs it at Ed’s head. Looking at Izzy.) “I dreamt that ya killed me. Shot me right through the skull.” (moving the gun and Izzy’s hand, drawing it to his forehead, leaning closer. The camera moves between Ed’s face and Izzy’s.) Izzy: (smiles slowly then sneers.) “Good for you.” Ed: (blinks and nods slowly.) “It was good for me. It’s just what the doctor ordered.” (The camera moves from Ed’s face to Izzy’s showing him with that frown as Ed stands over him, leaving the gun in Izzy’s hand.) “Anyway, it wasn’t even like that.” (walks away from Izzy.) Izzy: (eyes tracking Ed as he walks away.) Ed: “Not in my dream.” (moves to stand at the foot of Izzy’s bed, back to Izzy.) “I was standing.” (inhales). “Just like this.” (Closes eyes. Spreads arms.) Izzy: (from his view, Ed is standing against the light, back open, arms spread. He blinks and raises the gun audibly.) Ed: (Swallows, holding his arms out.) Izzy: (smiles, sniffs audibly, dropping the smile as he clenches his teeth. Laughs harshly, mockingly, gun raised.) “Ohhhhh, ah, you scared, Eddie? Too scared - too scared to do it yourself? Ay.” (laughs) “Go on, clean up your own fucking mess. I’m not doin’ it. I’ve been doin’ it all my fucking life.” Ed: (looks down, disappointed. blinks.) Izzy: Fuck off. Ed: (nods, swallows.) “Farewell, old chum.” (whispered. He walks up the stairs and away from Izzy.) Izzy: (watches, shaking, nodding slowly himself, breath hitching.) Ed: (reaches the top of the stairs. A gunshot sounds. A creak. Ed lowers his eyes, looking down at something off camera. Nods. Exhales.) “I loved you” (a pause) “best I could.” The scene transitions from there, and the next we see of Ed, he is initiating plan two of suicide attempts: steering the ship into a storm and goading the ship to kill him or die with him.

But Ed’s deal is so many more posts from here. No, we’re focused on Izzy for the moment, so what did this whole exchange mean for him?

First, the thought that Ed had come to do more damage. That Ed was there for Izzy, that this was about Izzy. But it’s not. Ed has had enough of that. He notably does not apologize. Izzy notably does not seem to expect one. There is history here, and the last time they were in positions like this, the camera angle was flipped - Ed at Izzy’s right, a hand covering Izzy’s mouth, making him eat his toe and the idea that things could go as they had been, that the Blackbeard Izzy had schemed and tried to have a man killed over was back. This time, Ed is at Izzy’s left, with a gun, and he doesn’t touch Izzy except to hand over the gun.

This is where it’s so important that Izzy believed he and Ed knew each other best of all. Because in episode one, Izzy was getting worried for Ed, but it’s in episode 2, in this moment, as Ed hands him a gun, that he realizes Ed wants to die. And it’s in this moment that he realizes that Ed fully believes Izzy could. That Ed has taken these actions believing that they would lead Izzy to kill him. That Ed wants to commit suicide via Izzy, that he thinks killing Ed is something that Izzy wants, could want, could do. 

This is Izzy, realizing that he and Ed don’t understand each other nearly as well as he thought. This is Izzy, realizing that Ed looks at him and sees a man who could and would kill him, when Izzy thinks that he couldn’t ever do that. This is Izzy, having the true final death knell on that relationship he believed they had, the intimacy he believed they had, the lack of a need for words. He thought all this time that he knew Ed best and that Ed knew him, and he doesn’t want to kill Ed - and he’s also hurt and angry and upset to know Ed genuinely thought he would. That Ed would come to him for this, because Izzy doesn’t think he could kill Ed, but Ed thinks he could. 

In his mind, Ed should know that Izzy could never kill him, should trust him, should know without having to be told that it would never happen, but here’s Ed in the flesh, asking him to kill him. 

It’s over, everything he thought was there. 

And Ed? Ed did care about Izzy, in his own way, but every overture he made was denied, shot down, Izzy not interested in the bird guy, the ship, the clouds and how they contribute to a plan, the drugs, and like, Izzy is allowed to not be interested in any of those things - but these are the things Ed was interested in. These are the ways Ed tried to connect most recently, and Izzy shot them all down. To Izzy, there was a deep and intimate connection in spite of all of that. To Ed, every way he could connect with Izzy was shot down. He loved him the best he could, which wasn’t a way that could provide either of them what they wanted. Izzy had love for Ed, but that love could not be fruitful or nurturing to either of them, because it was unspoken and therefore ripe for misunderstanding. 

Izzy stews down there in the ship, in his own thoughts, while Ed steers the ship into a storm and makes his last effort to die, to have it all end - to push the crew to killing him, or dying with him. And then he ties his leg up, makes his way above deck, shoots Ed in the arm to keep him from killing them all, and tries to kill himself instead, staring at Ed as he tries to shoot himself with the gun Ed wanted Izzy to kill him with. Despite the gun being aimed for the temple, he fails and falls back, leaving himself staring up as it rains on him, hiding any tears. Fang brings Ed down, and the crew gather together, Fang supporting Izzy’s weight, as Jim lifts a cannonball with a scream and prepares to bring it down on Ed’s head. Izzy watches without interfering.

EDIT: ADDED THIS SECTION:

A quick addendum: even though I watched episode 2 so many times, I didn't realize that Izzy tried to kill himself after Ed left the room! The gunshot that Ed hears is in fact Izzy trying and failing to shoot himself right then and there, in that moment that Ed departs. Izzy's forehead was so wet and the background of him falling back and water splashing was such that I truly thought that took place in the rain, and that he tried to shoot himself after shooting Ed. Thanks to @glamaphonic for letting me know. This does leave me even more certain that Izzy is motivated to do this because he has finally understood both that Edward wants to die, and that he and Edward never understood each other as well as he thought, which brings the last years of his life into question. He tried to kill himself, failed, and came up to stop Ed from bringing down the ship. It's not just that Izzy stews down there - as Ed departs, leaving Izzy behind, Izzy takes the shot. He tries and fails to kill himself, and wakes and climbs the steps to take the shot at Ed he couldn't before.

The next time we see Izzy is s1e3, The Innkeeper, when Stede crosses over to the Revenge and finds the crew amidst the wreckage. He’s eating a raw bird with the rest of the crew, and then is brought aboard the Red Flag. As Stede asks the crew about Ed’s location, Izzy watches him. He’s the only one not eating soup, hands tucked over his chest. 

As Stede starts asking questions - dangerous questions for Izzy and the former crew of the Revenge - he walks over with a crutch. 

Izzy: “Bonnet. Good to see you.” Stede: “Piss off, Izzy. I don’t wanna hear from you.”

Stede talks to the rest of the crew, as Izzy grimaces. Stede pays him no attention. The next time Izzy speaks up: Stede: “What about my painting? Why is it all stabbed up?” Izzy: (looking up through his hair, smiling.) “That was me.” Stede: (sighs and walks away without response.) Izzy: (blinks slowly, looking dismayed. We see him start to turn his head in Stede’s direction.)

Well, that seemed like someone trying to pick a fight, and disappointed he didn’t get one, too me. In Izzy’s mind, Stede is his romantic rival, the man Ed loves where he didn’t love Izzy, and, currently, also a threat, because if he keeps asking questions and reveals the mutiny, they’ll all be killed. 

But Stede is one more thing. Stede is another dagger in Izzy’s heart, as we continue transcribing:

Izzy: “Don’t cry Bonnet. We just redecorated.” (has clearly been following Stede.) Stede: “I don’t mind, actually. I think the knives really help bring the place together.” (calmly stated before he walks away to look at the rest of the furniture.) Izzy: (drops his head, looking away as though trying to gather words.) Stede: (turns to look at Izzy.) “What’d you do with him? I know he wouldn’t have left by choice.” Izzy: (sniffles) I know you think you understand him. Stede: (interrupting) “He was either gonna watch the world burn or die trying, so which was it?” (leaning forward despite the considerable distance, still calm.) Izzy: (swallows, dips head. Starts moving forward, gritting teeth through words.) “Alright Bonnet. Have it your own way.” (stalking forward to Stede on his crutch.) “He went mad. He tortured the crew. He took my fuckin’ leg ‘cause I dared to mention your fuckin’ name.” (emphasis on the curses, slams fist when he says your name.) Stede: (in drawn breath, turns away) Izzy: “He was a wild dog, and we dealt with him like one.” Stede: “You sent him to Doggy Heaven.” Izzy: (stares in silence, head shaking. Flashes back to Ed laying in the rain, breathing out “Finally,” and laughing as Jim brings a cannonball down on him as Izzy watches. Stares. Turns to look away from Stede, face twisting. Shakes his head. Shuts his eyes. Breathes the word:) “No.” Stede: (turns to look back at him.) Izzy: “I could never do that.” (looks away, still not looking Stede in the face). “We deserved him on a beach (sniffles) left nature to do the rest. More than he would have done for us.” Stede: (turns away, breathing out.) Izzy: (continuing) “You and me did this to him. And we cannot let this crew suffer anymore for our mistakes.” Stede: (turns to look at Izzy) “Why would they suffer?” Izzy: “If your captain senses mutiny, she’ll kill us all. That’s pirate code.” Stede: (camera lingers on his face as he swallows.)

Doggy Heaven has a heavy meaning in this series, considering that Ed was supposed to send Stede to Doggy Heaven, and couldn’t because of his love for Stede. Ed couldn’t bring himself to kill Stede, but here is Stede, who Izzy views as a romantic rival, guessing that Izzy could kill Ed. Acknowledging that he, like Ed, believes that Izzy could kill Ed. Izzy, who thinks he couldn’t and wouldn’t and has love for Ed, and sees himself as loyal. 

But Izzy did stand back as Ed was killed, and that’s why he reaches for dehumanizing language to defend the action - he calls Ed a wild dog and that they dealt with him like one. 

(It’s the first time in the show that a white character makes a racist remark without immediate consequences. Before anyway says otherwise, yes it is always racist for white people to dehumanize a man of color. It is always racist to say a person of color is or was an animal or liken them to being an animal. He could have said that Ed was a danger to the crew in any number of ways but he reached for likening him to a creature less than human and yeah that’s a racist thing to do. I believe the show did not follow through with consequences for this action because it’s clear that Izzy is STILL trying to pick a fight with Stede.)

The commonality in all of these scenes with Stede are twofold. One, Izzy is trying to distract Stede from the truth of the mutiny and what the crew did (and the fact that Ed is still aboard the Revenge, left for dead [or as Izzy put it, for nature to do the rest]). The second is that Izzy is trying and failing to pick a fight - failing, because Stede won’t take him up on it. At all. Stede is not engaging with Izzy at this point outside of the practical matter of seeking information, and that’s all he has to spare for Izzy - he’s already told him to piss off once, and that’s as much energy as he spends on it, but Izzy comes at Stede antagonistically more than once - three times, actually, and I think it’s because if he has a fight with Stede, and Stede says all the things he’s thinking, about how awful Izzy is, how he’s a traitor, how could he have hurt Ed, any of those things, then Izzy can fight about it, and he can justify it to himself, and he can ignore the thought from now on, because it’s the same thought that Stede fuckin’ Bonnet is having, and those thoughts are worthless.

But Stede doesn’t give him that. Stede doesn’t give him a fight at all. Stede walks away from Izzy again and again and again and in doing so does not grant Izzy an out, an out that can ONLY come from Stede, because no one else is going to disagree with the mutiny. 

Stede is the only one who could give him that fight, and Stede refuses. And Izzy continues to have to sit with his own thoughts and justifications and they clearly aren’t enough for him, because he’s continuing to push. 

Izzy is also trying to protect himself and the crew, here. It’s very much about that. He is trying to keep himself and them from dying by being caught out for mutiny, but I think it’s interesting that it’s only here that he tries to take accountability for what he said and did to Ed, and it’s in service of avoiding what he’s actually done. Izzy says that he and Stede did this to Ed - this that resulted in, as he says, Ed going mad and torturing the crew and having to be mutinied and abandoned on the beach. Izzy needs Stede to feel equally responsible - so that Stede will help protect the crew, but also because I think Izzy is feeling guilty and has been, because he could watch Ed die, and he could hurt Ed, and he didn’t think of himself as that person, but he is and was, and thinking that he caused all of this himself is too much. Better to give some of it to Stede, and help the crew out as well as himself. 

He had love for Ed, in his own way, and he thought they understood each other and had a partnership, but here’s Stede fuckin’ Bonnet, who only knew Ed for a matter of weeks, and understood him better than Izzy did and wouldn’t do the thing that Izzy did, and this is the final nail for Izzy, the thing he’s struggling with in this whole revelation that Ed didn’t have any romantic love for him, that there was no special intimate romance between them that didn’t need to be said or expressed or acknowledged with words or vulnerability to exist, because Stede takes one look at the situation and can summarize what happened. Stede knew that Ed would want to die, because you can’t actually burn the world down. You can say “burn the world or die trying”, but the only end result is dying trying. 

And Izzy, I genuinely don’t think, understood that Ed wanted to die. Not until Ed offered him the gun. Not until Ed spelled it out. Izzy knew that Ed was fucked up over his feelings, but I don’t think he understood where they were leading. 

But here’s Stede, and he did, and Izzy can’t take that, which is why once the truth is out and the mutineers are locked in the brig awaiting probable execution, Izzy tries to pick a fight one more time, even now that there’s nothing to distract Stede from. 

Izzy: (hears footsteps and turns his head.) Stede: (comes to the brig, staring through the bars at Izzy, then the rest of the crew.) Izzy: (smiles) “Go on Bonnet, give me your worst.” Crew: (looks up at Stede slowly.) Stede: (Looks at all of them, silent and not visibly angry, somber. Tilts his head down, eyes closed. Opens his eyes, shoves against the bars and turns and walks away without a word.) Izzy: (Drops the smile. Stares forward into the distance, eyes visibly wet with tears, blinks several times).

 So, clearly trying for a fight, wanting one, and continually being denied. Izzy is almost certainly grieving Ed, the relationship he thought they had, and also his leg, and Stede is the only other person here who would even possibly mourn Ed too, and Stede refuses to give him any response. Even when goaded, even knowing the truth, he has nothing to say to him. The next time Stede and Izzy are in the same room, Stede has concocted an escape plan, and doesn’t look at or speak to Izzy at all as he gives instructions and organizes the escape.

And when they have made it back to their ship, when they’re getting the wheel and rigging set for escape, they have a final conversation:

Izzy: (walks up behind Stede, who is watching the Red Flag.) “I just wanted to thank you for-” Stede: (walks away without letting him finish.) Izzy: (looks down, is left standing alone as live moves on the ship.)

Over the course of these three episodes, Izzy’s plot is realizing that he was fundamentally wrong about his relationship with Ed, his understanding of Ed as a person, and the depths of Ed’s feelings and despair. I think he’s also realizing that he was wrong about his relationship with Stede - he saw Stede as a romantic rival, and someone who hated him as much as he hates Stede, but given the opportunity to antagonize Izzy again and again, Stede refuses, because he doesn’t care about Izzy nearly enough. 

Izzy has misunderstood the nature of his relationship as it were with both of these men, who are, and always were, predominantly, chiefly, and only, interested in each other.

[axuanmii]

admit you ship incest dude. the cn/jp shippers say its incest. pick up a book and translate it, it says kaeya is adopted. .. and heres a long paragraph about how incest is only between biological families and more disrespect to people who are adopted...

no idea why my inbox didn't give me this notif until now, but now's a better time than any to talk more about this.

i'm chinese. i speak fluent mandarin chinese. i've consulted other native chinese speakers about this, both genshin players and unrelated. i play genshin with chinese audio and english subs specifically to catch and complain about inaccuracies. i'd reveal more information but then i think it'd be trivially easy to doxx me if one knew what they were looking for.

fundamentally, the issue of incest lies in physical reproduction, yet i find adoptive incestuous relationships discomforting all the same. it's why i didn't like or finish go ahead (以家人之名) because i felt that it laid too much into the siblings aspect for romantic relationships to be feasible, and it was super contradictory from the initial general message of the first bittersweet yet wholesome episode.

however, personally, i just don't think kaeya felt like a part of the family until crepus's death and he really reflected on crepus's actions towards him (hangout). and even after beginning to view crepus as a father figure, he wouldn't have so shallowly made the transition for diluc to be his brother by adoption and consequently changed his entire mind about the guy (which you can see with the way he chooses to refer to both men with different terms, one adoptive and familial, one very clearly 'sworn', very consistently throughout the whole game. if that ever changes in chinese, well, at least you can know that i'll make a post about it if i still care about genshin by then.)

the localization team does make plenty of serious mistakes, and it's of my opinion that as a result, it has very clearly skewed character relationships with those mistakes, (cynari and collei, eulamber, some npcs in liyue, sumeru) some from cultural differences, some just from lazy translation overall. there's layers of complexity in how chinese utilizes honorifics and affectionate terms, as well as contextual consideration between fiction and reality, and sometimes i feel like the english localization team just threw it all into google translate and called it a day.

i don't even ship kaeluc that much. i like to call it the secret third thing where they can't get off their asses to talk about anything ever so they exist in an undefined space and to have them return to any semblance of a healthy relationship, platonic, familial, or romantic, would require a novel's length worth of development that hoyoverse will probably never write, and so my brain has made up novels of all three kinds and more.

however, i also don't care about people who do ship kaeluc or treat any other fictional media in an incestuous or otherwise problematic manner, regardless of language or culture. this is because i operate on a "don't like, don't read, don't interact" mindset. it makes being in fandom more fun; you should try it.

my disappointment wasn't aimed at the fact that i think too little people ship kaeluc. it just sucks to see people claim that that's what's wrong with the fandom and spin this evil gross imagery around the ship over a misunderstanding, especially when that's not how i view it. it's also the only thing vehemently regularly repeated ('klcers dni') when there's so many other issues with the game and the fandom.

(off topic but what's the worst thing that'll happen if a kaeluc shipper likes your fan stuff. it's not like they come into your tumblr asks to bother you with an "oh btw you're wrong about how you enjoy this media and this is what's right"-- oh wait that's what's going on here right)

including the fact that people like you purposefully go around searching in the kaeluc tag (which you probably did, because nobody is scrolling that far back in my blog to find this one specific post to complain about) to police and pick fights with people over a stupid issue from 2020/2021. i guess tumblr isn't a safe place to talk about kaeluc either lmao.

and to think i left anon asks on in the hopes that it could be an inbox for anyone who wanted to ask me art questions or just leave something positive and not feel too awkward (where do i get the confidence in thinking anyone would ask my incompetent brain for help lol).

to be fair, it's going to be my fault for continuing to draw attention to this by responding to such an ask instead of just deleting it and moving on but fuck it we ball.

this ended up pretty long but i feel like it would've been too rude to just say "会说中文的干嘛要翻书 :P". probably would've been funnier though and saved me a lot of time. kudos to you if you actually read this and read through everything.

final note:

[greenerteacups]

Hey GT, glad to see you're back! I'm still halfway thru Lionheart (just read the world cup chapter, what a delight) and your notes got me wondering.

I'm sure you've probably answered this before but how do you manage to make the world feel so rich? I'm not that into the fandom so I don't know If there are some things fanon agreed upon or if it is your own musings about the magic world. Like Draco explaining to Hermione about portkeys or how many languages Krum speaks.

How do you decide what's important enough to get a mention? Where do you go when you need answers and Canon is not enough to provide it?

Thanks for the kind words, and for the question! It's a matter of personal taste, like anything. Some writers prefer an athletic, streamlined plot, with only as much worldbuilding as you absolutely need (how does Panem run a command economy of 4.5 million people primarily on fossil fuels when its coal district has a population of less than 10,000? fuck off! who cares! they're Y/A dystopias about a TV show where teens beat each other to death!). Some writers, on the other hand, won't bother to start the story until they know the pH of the soil in every region of the world they're writing about. I'm somewhere on the second half of the scale, in that I'll give details that aren't strictly necessary to the plot, just because I like to feel like I'm writing about a world where real, extraneous things can happen. Some details are foreshadowing; some details are Special Mouseketools that will Help Us Later; and sometimes, you just get to know a cool fact about portkeys.

I guess part of the fun of building out a world is getting to think about Everything, which is what my brain normally does. I have a pretty broad body of literature as a starting gate, so there's plenty of room to play. E.g., when I started writing Krum, I thought about how he's not super fluent in English in canon, and that naturally made me ask why, because he clearly has taken English, so either he only started lessons recently or it hasn't been a priority for him; and then I went "wait, what's his first language? Bulgarian, right? But Durmstrang isn't — hang on—" and then I pulled up an actual map of Europe, which led me to realize that he wouldn't likely be speaking his first language at Durmstrang, which means he already had to become bilingual just to start his wizarding education, and that explains part of why he doesn't have a ton of time/effort to spare for a third language, plus he'd probably have a translator available whenever he traveled with a team because he's a B.F.D. — etc., etc. And then you keep thinking about that until you remember that you're supposed to be writing a fic, and you scramble to get back to doing that. Only now, you have worldbuilding! Congrats.

To try for an even halfway useful answer to your question: worldbuilding becomes most important when it creates limitations, because limitations define your characters and give them chances to develop/reveal themselves. So the details of portkeys become important because they explain the limitations of magical travel, which is a big nebulous ??? in the original series, since the introduction of teleportation via Apparating means that all other forms of transportation become inefficient by comparison. It also means the limitations introduced by travel — that is, not all characters can be in all places at once — also go away, because anyone can be anywhere immediately. From a narrative perspective, this sucks massive horse ass. Hence: I dumped a shit ton of limitations on Apparation (i.e., (1) it requires a ton of energy, (2) it's really fucking hard, (3) it's really fucking dangerous, (4) it's more of both the farther away you're going, (5) it's more of both the more people you take with you, (6) you can't Apparate without a clear destination in mind which means (7) you need to have been there already, and so (8) some people prefer not to do it). Hence, I also put limitations on portkeys (i.e., they have to be set up well in advance, you need to identify out both destinations precisely beforehand, and the calculations are difficult to do). Those limitations, and the Watsonian explanations you create for them, are your worldbuilding. They're what make the world feel real, because they give it grit and character. They give you a more complete sense of what you can and cannot do.

The rest of it is taste and preference, really; it's what interests you, and what parts of the world you want to explore. That's going to be unique to every author, and that's the beauty of worldbuilding — it reflects the parts of the world that you like to think about.

[secretagentspydetectiveninja]

The new trilogy means we finally got official French translations of the fifth and sixth games (the fourth already had one) so I did my thing and played through them, since they're always a lot of fun. Here are some things about French Dual Destinies I thought you might like to know:

Yes, it's set in France as per usual. They are all French people who live in Paris. And yes, that means that in this universe there is a Japanese village themed around yokai within throwing distance of Paris.

Athena lived in America in this version, and therefore peppers her speech with English and Spanish. My favourite unhinged franglais line was "let's get au travail" which I will be using from now on because it's hilarious

Many characters got French pun names again. Simon's name is "Jack Lamenoire" -- Jack, because the French version of Simon Says uses the name Jack/Jacques, and "lame noire" means "black blade". (Also he's not British or anything in this version, he just speaks in somewhat old-timey French.)

He has multiple nicknames for the judge that are all slight variations of "Your Baldness". He doesn't do that "-dono" suffix thing but he does refer to Phoenix in particular as "Maître Wright".

...I don't like pointing out things I didn't like buuuuuut his voice is a huge downgrade. Actually, to be honest, I don't like the new French voices that much in general... idk man they just don't sound very enthusiastic...

Filch's name is "Arsène Loupet", reference to the famous fictional thief Arsène Lupin, which I thought was pretty cool! (Herlock Sholmes was also a reference to that series too btw!)

Athena and Apollo use informal pronouns for each other pretty much from the get-go, but there have been some changes from the previous games: Phoenix now uses the informal "tu" for Apollo (and Athena) whereas in the prev game he didn't, Pearl now uses "tu" for Phoenix as well, and Klavier uses "tu" for Apollo now (but Apollo still calls him the formal "vous" lmao)

SPEAKING OF... SPEAKING OF. The French localisation continues to utterly baffle me when it comes to Klavier (or Konrad as he's called in French). No listen, liSTEN. In the previous game he was specifically stated to be English and did his law exams in England and dropped English words into his speech (and this is still the case in the trilogy version, I checked). But now?? They seem to have gone back on it and in this game he says he's German again, like the in English translation??? But he's still dropping English words into his speech randomly????? Look I already went through the five stages of grief when I found out they'd english-ified him, I made my peace with it, and NOW they change it???????

God and his new French voice sucks too (his old one was actually good)... what have they done to you my poor boy, was making you English not bad enough T_T Oh and he and Athena didn't even get their little language club moment where they both start speaking in the same foreign language?? Like, that just straight-up didn't happen here and I had been waiting for it aauuugh it's cool it's fine it's cool i'm okay i'm--

True to Dual Destinies fashion, there are still typos. In an emotional moment, Apollo took a leave of asbence from the office. Not absence. Asbence.

I can't put my finger on it but Robin's coming out scene felt more... respectful in French? The English translation was done over a decade ago so it feels somewhat dated, maybe that's why... I obviously don't know if she was purposely written to be a trans girl but she very much comes across that way, and it feels like the French translators were aware of that interpretation and took it into account, idk maybe it's just me

THEY GOT RID OF MY FAVOURITE LINE. THE FORESHADOWEY ONE WHERE SIMON TELLS ATHENA THAT THE PERSON SHE WANTS TO SAVE MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD DOESN'T DESIRE HER DEFENCE, AND HE'S CLEARLY TALKING ABOUT HIMSELF. THE FRENCH MADE HIM SAY SOMETHING ELSE WAY LESS COOL. I don't wanna be like "FRENCH TURNABOUT ACADEMY IS DEAD TO ME" because most of it was awesome, but man these occasional things made me wanna flip tables

Cosmic Turnabout and Turnabout for Tomorrow were great in French though, so there's that. Clay's French name is "Pierre" which worked surprisingly well because it means stone or rock, and the moon rock was also called that, so like, the phantom had to kill Pierre in order to get the pierre... idk it worked and it was cool

Simon and Athena switch to using informal pronouns for each other very near the end of the game, in the scene where they work together to psychologically mess with the phantom. It's around the time when they start openly calling each other by first name since everyone knows now that they're old friends.

Phoenix and Edgeworth also occasionally refer to each other by first name in this game, which threw me off completely. (Reminder that Edgeworth's French name is "Benjamin Hunter". Just picture Phoenix standing in front of Edgeworth and calling him BENJAMIN. Now you understand how absolutely bizarre it felt.)

Here's the entirety of The Dissin' of Phoenix Wright in French

[dozing-marshmallow]

Okey, hear me out.

Chris Mclean with a wife that is just THICC. Like she Has a bit of a chubby tummy with big thights, chest, behind etc.

She Has them amazing curves AND also is really sweet and caring towards everyone. You just look at her and you think "How the hell did Chris git with her?" And when you meet her you'r even more confused. Idk I just Imagine Chris be the kind of dude to find any excuse to ley his head on you cuz you just so comfortable and soft <33 and when you fell backpains cuz of you'r breasts he hires the best massagers[or just does it himself ;)]

If you'r uncomfortable its ok. But just let me know then so I don't wait like an idiot.

I hope you'll have a lovely day!

(sorry for aby gramer or spelling errors, English is not my first lenguage)

👀 pixar mom reader confirmed?? I’ll be for real, this was a lot of fun to write, and don’t worry about grammar mistakes! Thank you for the request and may you all enjoy and have a lovely day too~

CHRIS MCLEAN X “THICC”! WIFE! READER HEADCANONS

No one could deny how attractive you were.

Your own husband couldn’t resist you for more than half a day.

“Chriiis, what are you doing?” a question that often left your mouth imbued a different answer each time from Chris.

“You’re comfy, (Y/N).” his usually loud voice blocked by his face sinking as far as he could into your covered cleavage.

"Aren’t you honest!" you gently nudge his head,"But we have an episode to get to in two minutes, so if you just wanna...” you step back, forcing Chris into solitary.

He huffs, before getting an amazing idea- he puts his hand over his eyes,“Oh no! I can’t see where I’m going! Is this...” he zombie walks towards you and readjusts his head back on the natural pillow of your chest before you could properly make a run for it,“I made it to bed! Alright, I’m gonna stay right here until I regain my sight!”

“Chris!” you squall, finding displeasure that he wasn't taking you seriously and wasn't getting off so easily this time, with the hand he used to blind himself now tightened around you,“Come onn, there’ll be plenty of time to do this after we shoot the episode!”

“Just five more minutes, please (Y/N)!”

Not on days like that, albeit you do dress up in a bunny fit for him.

“You know I’m very fertile, Chris.” you press yourself up against him enticingly on his lap,“As fertile as a bunny rabbit can be.”

“I can tell.” his voice sounded composed, but his face was crazy red,“Can never get enough of your legs though. You know that you could choke someone with just one thigh, right?”

My, that sounds dangerous!,“Oh dear... I’m not that heavy, am I?”

“Never! It’s like I always say... Everything about you is awesome. Everything. From the top of your head to the core of your skeleton.”

“Well, that’s relieving...” You feel his hand exploring about on your round back,“How do you like these fishnets? Wore them just for you.”

His hands then squeeze through the space between under your thighs and the top of his lap, masking his extreme prurience with his dismissive,“Duh. Who else would you wear them for?”

With the contestants, you’re very friendly to them.

Like once beginning with brushing Lindsay’s hair,“Lindsay, you have such beautiful hair."

The “dumb princess” giggles,“I knoww! It’s the prettiest bare here!”

From the wide distance in which Chris stood from, he snaps a photo of you tending to Lindsay with his camera,“Aww!”

Seeing that strengthened Cody’s confidence to approach the hot host,“Hey Chris... I need to ask you advice on something.”

“Sure thing dude, what’s up?” Chris grinned, not taking his eyes off his camera.

“It’s..." the geek takes a breath,"How do you get girls?”

“You say exactly what’s on your mind.”

“Well, I do...” his voice quiet,“But every time I speak, Gwen looks at me like I’m a donkey carcass!”

"Sucks to be you, can’t relate one bit.”

Cody was about to whine his way into defending himself had he not fully noticed Chris’ lack of presence in the conversation. He was...taking pictures?

“Uh...why are you taking photos of (Y/N) when you get to see her everyday? If anyone should be taking pictures, it should be me!” He really didn’t think with that one.

“I know dude, but she’s into photography and she reaaaaaally likes having her pictures taken. It’s a favour for her and I.” he suddenly turns to Cody, washing a scowl on his face,“Save your photo taking skills for someone else, okay? Not on my someone who’s like old enough to be your mom. That’s just gross.”

Meanwhile with the girls:

“(Y/NNN), you should really reconsider your marriage.” Beth advises with a glum glaze reflecting off her glasses.

Confusion bubbles your mind,“What do you mean?” you ask, placing Lindsay’s brush down as you began dividing her hair into smaller sections.

“What does Beth mean?“ Sadie repeated like you were crazy,“(Y/N), you’re like a super goddess compared to Chris! He doesn’t deserve you.”

“Yeah, what Sadie said! I was thinking that too!” After Katie spends a minute gushing with Sadie about their unbreakable friendship, she turns back to you with concern,“But for real, you’re WOAH and there, Chris is...” she doesn’t feel the need to finish it, which takes you by surprise.

“Aww, what? He’s way more WOAH than I am!”

“That’s not true...” Bridgette curiously comments,“What do you see in that guy?”

“He makes me laugh.”

Pause.

Courtney’s the first to boom,“Seriously? There’s about ten thousand other men that can do that and not be as horrible as Chris is!”

“Ohh, but Chris isn’t horrible!” you exclaim, dropping Lindsay’s hair to clasp your hands for the moment,“He’s a wonderful guy! The most wonderful man I’ve met in my entire life!” 

“(Y/N)... You’re too nice.” Gwen breathes out exasperated, gothic view floats to your symmetrically defined waist,“Have you tried modelling before?”

“I have, yes, but I was rejected for not fitting the standards.”

“Impossible!” Lindsay flips her head around on impulsive shock. Thanks to her extensive hair length, it barely made a difference to the styling process.

“Possible. They said I wasn’t what they were looking for and told me to surgically change myself before reaching out to them again. As if!” you do the next batch of golden dyed hair,“While the experience wasn’t ideal, it reminded me of something that even as a grown woman I need to be careful of. At the time, I was actually willing to lose a part of me that I was perfectly fine with for the sake of a runaway platform. Doesn’t that sound ridiculous? To do all that for one place? Let this resonate that you as young girls should never feel that you need to ruin what you were naturally given to feel loved or pretty. If something or someone doesn’t accept you for who you are naturally, the relationship was not meant to be and you mustn’t dwell on them. Don’t do things to yourself that aren’t for yourself.”

You had done the final twist in the band of Lindsay’s hair.

...

All they could think by the end of it was

How the hell did Chris get with her.

Back to some private examples with lover man.

“I’m so exhausted!” you fall down in your armchair, groaning to Chris,“I could do with a new bra...”

He smirked,“That one you’re wearing too small?”

“Or I’m too big.” your hands shoot up through your shirt to unclip it, freedom freezing off the tension around your shoulders,“It’s hard to breathe sometimes, you know? These balls of feminine fat hang on my chest doing nothing all day, but weigh me down and kill my back! Sometimes I envy women with smaller boobs, they can move as much as they please and don’t need to spend hours on hours searching for clothes!”

“Yeah uh, I don’t think comparing yourself in this case is gonna help you feel better.” a cheeky glint fires across his pupils, his voice rasping gingerly,“How about a nice massage instead? All it costs is your love!” 

A tease of your own climbs up on your lips,“And by love, you mean a week’s worth of getting to sleep on me?”

“Huh? Oh no, of course not!” Liar. Look at how happy he was to do something for someone else. It was exactly what he wanted.

“Okay, okay.” you laugh and trudge to the bed, preparing to undress yourself.

Like Chris was gonna allow any masseuse, no matter how good they were, to see your body the way he could.

Especially if he could get a personal reward out of it.

You intentionally moaned when his fingers dug deep into your rhomboids.

“Better?” his tone still mischievous and salient.

You nod, sitting up and sighing in relief,“Much better... You’ve improved your technique, haven’t you?”

He scratches the back of his head, smiling sincerely,“You noticed? Well, of course, only the best for you.”

“Aw, aren’t you the best husband anyone can ask for?” you push yourself off the bed and wrap your arms around his neck, kissing his flustered cheek,“Thank you. Now who’s ready for a good night sleep?”