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starcrossedkaiju · 3 years ago

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Kingslayer AU: Chapter 3

This one is a bit shorter. It’s entirely fluff, nothing bad happens here. I felt bad for my man, I really did. Scott really channeled Ethan Winters in that last chapter.

Also, Jimmy is here!

Once again Scott awoke to something touching his face. This time it decidedly was not water, although he kind of wished it was due to how dirty he felt. Scott groaned when he opened his eyes and was immediately blinded by harsh sunlight. He remembered making it to the desert and presumably passing out. Was he dead?

“Scott?”

Holy shit. Someone just spoke.

“Hey dude, can you hear us?”

Two mystery people hovered over his line of sight. Their faces were unrecognizable due to being backlit by the sun.

“Hey Scott, can you open your eyes?” Someone spoke softly to him. He reached up slightly with his hand and they took it with a loving squeeze.

Back on earth now, Scott recognized a half of his company.

“Is that you Jimmy?” Scott muttered through half lidded eyes, “It’s so bright, I can’t see your face,” he apologized quietly.

Jimmy giggled with a twinge of sadness, his hand traveled up to cup the other’s cheek, “yes it’s me dear. Grian is here too. I’m going to bring you home in no time,” he reassured.

A primal chill went down Scott’s spine. It sent his exhausted brain into an instant overdrive, causing him to loose his breath quite suddenly.

“No..” Scott said. His voice was hoarse and laced with something like fear.

“They’ll kill me,” he whispered pleadingly, “they’ll come back for me and this time they’ll just kill me! Please don’t, they’ll kill us,” he repeated until he had no more air to talk with.

Jimmy’s eyes were wide with shock, he’d pulled his husband into his lap and off of the rough sand so that Scott’s head was off the floor. A hand fruitlessly rubbed circles on his arm in an attempt for comfort, which seemed to be lost on poor Scott.

“Okay- Scott? Count to ten with me will you?” Grian stopped observing and pat his disheveled friend on both of his shoulders to get his attention.

“Deep breath in, then out,” he guided, and Scott followed him shakily.

Grian made Scott do it ten times before shifting to counting up and down from ten. Scott was able to breathe again and he instinctively turned his head away from the sun. Jimmy placed a gentle hand over his eyes.

Scott tuned out of the conversation in favor of slipping into a comfortable numbness. He could infer the pair were considering their options to get him home. Jimmy couldn’t carry him alone, Grian definitely couldn’t.

The sun in the desert was harsh during the summer months, thankfully it was wintertime and a cool wind swept over the land. Scott focused on the calming sound of a breeze on the sand as he fell asleep once more.

*****

“Careful with him Scar, you’ll snap his neck,” Jimmy complained from somewhere under Scott’s line of hearing.

“Dude shut up, you’re being paranoid,” Scar chuckled back at him.

“I’m really not. Don’t let his neck hang like that,” Jimmy replied.

“Guys stop. His neck is perfectly fine,” Grian audibly hit someone on the arm as he scolded them.

*****

The uncomfortable feeling of grime against sheets greeted Scott when he awoke. It looked like late afternoon judging by the light coming through the curtain (which was a white sheet clipped over a window). He sat up, instantly recognizing his whereabouts.

The Sand Castle.

So it wasn’t a dream, he thought, he actually had made it out. Glancing down at his hands, he observed a myriad of bandages adorning his hands and wrists. They must have been pretty messed up. The rest of his body was still covered in dirt and sand, hence why they stuck him in a cot instead of a bed. Figures.

His sheet was also looking worse for wear, so when he stood up on mildly shaky legs he bunched up the ruined blanket and took it with him to go find someone. Making extra sure to hold the railing on the stairs, he came upon a window and took a second to look outside. The desert was expectantly barren, everyone must have been downstairs.

A muffled conversation became clear when Scott made it to the living room. Scar, Grian, and Jimmy had taken up residence on a single couch. They must have been waiting for something to smelt and conversing frivolously with the resident Enderman. A window near the door was propped open to let in the cold afternoon air which dulled the heat and mild stench coming from the furnace. It must be iron, for Scott could taste the faint metal in the back of his mouth.

He leaned on the doorframe casually as all the eyes in the room turned to him.

“Hey look whose awake!” Scar greeted him with an arms open gesture, “the dust man himself,” he added with a smirk.

“You really are quite dirty,” Grian agreed.

Jimmy almost threw himself from the couch, he went to hug Scott but was pushed away to arms length.

“They’re right, I am very gross right now,” Scott cautioned, but his husband would not be deterred.

Jimmy pushed the other’s arms down and pulled him close, leaning his chin on top of the other’s head gently. Scott sighed and gave in as well.

A unanimous decision seemed to be made when Scott was sat down on the couch. Scar, Grian, and Jimmy hovered over him awkwardly with worried faces. Unsure what to ask him and what not to ask him.

“Uh, I’m assuming you have questions?” Scott broke the silence.

“Yes. Many,” Grian said, “I suppose we should start with where you’ve been for the past three days,” he supplied.

“Three days?” Scott replied slightly horrified.

“That’s not good,” Scar said in reference to Scott’s lack of awareness.

“Well okay, let’s start with where you’ve been right? I mean I think we all know the answer, but still”, Jimmy sat down next to Scott. Probably for moral support.

“Right. Yeah, I got kidnapped; if it wasn’t obvious,” Scott said. Everyone nodded with an I knew that expression.

“They whacked me over the head with a stick in the woods and then,” he paused and looked at his hands. They were shaking, so he curled and uncurled his fists a few times.

“They threw me in a hole and left me there,” he said.

“Wait like an actual hole? Underground?” Scar asked, one eyebrow raised.

“Yes, underground, it was like a cell made of cobblestone. There wasn’t any light, and nobody came to visit me either. That’s probably why I didn’t know how long I was down there,” Scott confirmed.

“What so they just left you in there to die?” Jimmy butted in with a concerned inflection.

“Man that’s messed up, but hey this is good news! Now we have a valid excuse to take Dogwarts down right?” Scar said.

“What?!” yelled Grian, “this is not good news at all. What is wrong with you?”

“We are not building another bomb,” Jimmy said.

“We are completely outnumbered,” added Grian.

“I am not picking another fight with those guys. I think we’ve messed with them enough, look at where that got us,” Jimmy agreed.

“Guys shut up!” Scott said. He stood up from the couch. Everyone seemed to eye him with speculation.

“I need to go wash up,” he excused himself, taking the bedsheet with him out the front door.

*****

Around the back of the base there was an area where the mountain dropped off into a small pond. Scott slid down on the loose sand until he reached the dock where the Red Desert kept their stash of gunpowder. The sky was empty and quiet, eerily so. The only sound came from a slight din of insects and the babble of water lapping against the legs of the dock.

Peaceful.

Scott pulled off his boots, dumping a mound of dirt from both of them before continuing to strip down to his shorts. He waded into the water and submerged himself. He could see the cloud of dirt coming off of him when he ran his fingers through his hair.

Scott stayed under the water for a while. The muffled ambience calmed his nerves. He allowed himself to cry for a moment, then returned to the surface.

“Wow, I didn’t think you were coming back up,” Jimmy said from above him.

Scott yelped with shock, spinning around to face the other.

“Don’t do that!” he scolded with no malice, but he splashed some water in his direction.

“I didn’t even do anything,” Jimmy pleaded and laughed as he was bombarded with cold water.

“Whatever. Were you just standing there watching me?” Scott asked.

Jimmy shrugged dismissively.

“You creep,” Scott splashed him again.

Jimmy made to reach down and get Scott back, but the ladder grabbed his hand when it was near and pulled his unsuspecting husband headfirst into the pond. Jimmy seemed to have already dressed for the occasion and was also wearing his shorts and a T-shirt, so there was no real harm done to him besides his meticulously styled hair.

Scott leaned on the dock to prevent himself from drowning in his laughter. Jimmy resurfaced and a long string of water flew from his now messy hair as he flung it from his eyes.

“You…” Jimmy growled, sending a playful spritz into Scott’s eyes.

“You,” Scott said, “were asking for that,” he teased.

“Ugh. Well I’m glad you still seem to be yourself after all that. Don’t be taking it out on me though,” Jimmy joined the other on leaning on the dock.

“No promises,” Scott responded jokingly, but his smile quickly faded from his face. He pulled himself out of the water and onto the dock, a puddle forming under him where he sat with his legs in the water.

The lake was a deep blue color, just barely able to see the bottom through the dark shadows cast by the mountain in the now setting sun. Scott’s reflection gazed back at him. Cleaner than last time, his bangs were plastered to the front of his face by the water, which had turned his hair into as deep of a blue as the lake below him.

He felt rather exposed. Still afraid that Dogwarts was hot on his trail, they’d no doubt realized he had escaped them.

This was not the life he wanted. Constantly being on the run, feeling unsafe at home, and fearing that your presence could be the reason the people you love get hurt. Scott looked at his mangled hands, his fingers were irritated and red from where they poked out of the bandages; and for the first time in a long time he felt pain.

Not the pain that comes when you catch your finger in a doorframe, or the pain from a bad trip down the porch steps; the pain that grows in your chest when you feel like a burden. When you’ve had to be picked up and glued back together by another person one too many times. When you’ve spent your life running, only to fall into someone else’s arms and suddenly feel safe for once.

When you’re terrified of what will happen if they’re not there anymore.

“Hey,” Jimmy said with a reprimanding tone, “you’ve got that look on your face,” he warned.

Scott threw him a side glance, “what look?”

“That look. The look you get when you start overthinking your life instead of talking to someone about it,” Jimmy recited.

“I hate when you do that,” Scott sighed.

“Do what?”

“Know me,” Scott deadpanned.

Jimmy hoisted himself up and sat next to his husband. He tamed the strands of hair from the other’s eyes, tucking them behind his ears.

“I brought some soap. I was planning on lending it to you before an attempt on my life was made,” he said, leaning backwards and coming back with a bucket and a bar of light orange soap. It was lightly used, it smelled of citrus and mint.

“I feel like I never knew anyone before I knew you,” Scott said as he examined the bar of soap up near his face.

That wasn’t entirely a lie. Jimmy was the first person Scott had seen after entering the border.

“Sometimes it makes me afraid that I know someone so intimately. It makes me feel dangerous,” he said.

“Dangerous?” Jimmy took the soap from his hands and filled up the bucket with fresh water.

“Yeah. In the way that loving something so completely makes it easier to get to me. I’m afraid of people finding out that the way to destroy me is destroying you,” Scott explained.

“That won’t happen,” Jimmy replied, “I can’t even count how many times we’ve almost died and been just fine. Remember that TNT?”

“Oh my god don’t even remind me,” Scott covered his face.

“I am reminding you, because it was cool! I mean I’m the one who took out the Red King without dying,” Jimmy bragged.

“On accident!” Scott reminded him.

“Nobody needs to know that. Also I got him first,” the other added. Scott kicked water at him.

Jimmy put a hand on Scott’s back and pushed him into the lake.

“Hey,” Scott said.

“Stay right here,” Jimmy directed and positioned Scott between his knees so that he could reach his hair easier.

“Don’t let that indestructible mindset get to you,” Scott said. He admired the ripples on the surface of the water.

“Maybe if I believe it enough it’ll be real,” Jimmy said with no particular conviction, focused on making sure he adequately scrubbed his husband’s hair.

#mcyt #3rd life smp #3rdlife #flower husbands #scott smajor #solidarity gaming #grian #goodtimeswithscar #3rdlife smp #cas types

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introvertguide · 4 years ago

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Pulp Fiction (1994); AFI #94

The most recent movie for review was the Quentin Tarantino crime thriller comedy (probably more things) Pulp Fiction (1994). It is a very complicated story that is told out of chronological order and focuses on scenes of meaningful character interaction. This confusion meant it lost out to movies with a more straight forward time line at the Oscars, since the move was nominated for seven awards but only took home one. The single win for best screenplay was well deserved and I still believe it is one of the most creatively written films of all time. I want to go over the plot to show what I mean, but let me do my standard due diligence:

SPOILER WARNING!!! I AM ABOUT TO GIVE THE BASIC DETAILS OF ONE OF THE MOST COMPLEX STORY LINES IN MOVIE HISTORY!!! IT WILL NOT LIKELY SPOIL MUCH OF ANYTHING, BUT I AM STICKING THIS WARNING ON JUST IN CASE SOMEBODY FINDS SOMETHING!!!

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The film begins with what is pretty much a prologue but what turns out to be about the middle of the film chronologically. A couple is at a diner and they are talking about robbing banks. They only refer to each other as Pumpkin (Tim Roth) and Honey Bunny (Amanda Plummer). They discuss the best kind of places to rob and they decide that a diner would be a good change of pace. Impulsively, they pull out guns and hold up the diner and...title card with awesome spaghetti western music!

Two hitmen are talking about Europe as they go to do a job. Vincent Vega (Jon Travolta) talks about his adventures with Jules Winnfield (Samuel L. Jackson) as they pull up at an Los Angeles apartment complex. The two discuss their boss Marsellus Wallace and how touchy he is about his wife. The boss has apparently sent them to get something from a bunch of guys. Jules and Vincent call on an apartment with 3 college age men and intimidate them into giving over a briefcase with something glowing inside. The case is what they came for, so the hitmen take it and kill two of the men at the apartment...

Flash to a new scene in which Vincent is going to get some drugs from his dealer (Eric Stoltz). Vincent is a heroine user despite cocaine being the popular drug. It turns out Vincent was asked by his boss to take out his wife...the one he is very protective of. He just needs to hang out with her so she is not bored and not get into trouble. To accomplish this, he shoots up some heroine and goes to meet the wife named Mia Wallace (Uma Thurman). They seem to get along and he drives her to a restaurant called Jack Rabbit Slims. The place is fantastic, all the waiters are dressed up like American movie icons and the booths are repurposed cars from the 50s (if this place actually existed, you can be sure I would search it out and go there at least once). The two bond over dinner and then volunteer for a twist dance contest.

Mia and Vincent go back to her house and Vincent goes to the restroom to talk himself out of trying to score with Mia. She is pretty cool, but not worth dying for. While he is away, Mia finds some heroine in the pocket of Vincent’s jacket and thinks it is cocaine. She snorts it and immediately starts to overdose. Vincent panics and decides to drive her to the dealer’s house. The dealer has a nurse kit that comes with a giant needle full of adrenaline which Vincent stabs her with. She wakes up and Vincent takes her back home and is glad that he will live another day...

We jump to a flashback of a young boy who is has lost his father in Vietnam. An officer is visiting that has a gift. Apparently, there is a family watch that belonged to the boys great grandfather and had been passed down through the generations. His father had it when he was captured and gave it to the officer before the father died in the POW camp. The officer escaped and found the boy to give him the watch...

A boxer named Butch (Bruce Willis) wakes up from a dream. He is the boy all grown up. He is about to throw a fight for Marsellus Wallace (Ving Rhames), the same boss that everyone is afraid of. Butch does not throw the fight and accidently kills the other boxer. It turns out that he bet on himself and now he needs to get out of town before Marsellus Wallace catches him. He goes to a hotel where his rather dumb girlfriend is waiting for him. They go to bed and then are about to leave the next morning when it turns out that she forgot his watch. Butch freaks out and goes back to their old apartment to get the watch (note the very long take following Bruce Willis as he takes a back way to get to the apartment). Vincent is there waiting for him, but Vincent is in the bathroom and Butch is able to get a gun and kill Vincent as he is coming out of the bathroom. Things seem good so Butch drives off...

As Butch drives home, he sees Marsellus crossing the street in front of him so Butch hits the gas and runs down the boss but also hits an oncoming car. Both men are injured but Marsellus gains his senses and chases Butch into a shop where both are captured by a weird redneck with a shotgun. Butch and Marsellus are tied up in the basement of the shop and a man named Zed shows up. The shop owner has a gimp in a box (all leathered up and everything) and other fetish things downstairs. After a quick game to pick who goes first, they take Marcellus into another room to rape him. Butch manages to escape and is running away...but he decides can’t leave somebody to be assaulted like that. He grabs a weapon from the shop and kills the shop owner and frees Marsellus from Zed. Marsellus is not happy and says he will go “medieval” on Zed and allows Butch to leave town. Butch collects his girlfriend and leaves immediately...

Flash back in time (we know this because Vincent is alive) to right after Vincent and Jules shoot the guys with the case. Another guy in the other room jumps out and unloads six rounds at the two and misses every shot. The hitman kill that man, but Jules is shaken and decides to give up the business. They take a fourth gut with them in the car to go back to see Marsellus. On the drive over, Vincent accidently shoots the passenger while going over a pothole. The inside of the car is absolutely covered in blood and brains, so the two have to find a safe house. They go to the home of Jimmie (Quentin Tarantino) who will help them but says they have to get out in a couple of hours before his wife gets home. They call Marsellus, who sends over a cleaner named Wolf (Harvey Keitel). They are able to get everything cleaned up in time and leave with the car and the body. Jules and Vincent have to change out of their bloody clothes and decide to take a cab out to a diner for some food before seeing Wallace.

The two are at a familiar looking diner discussing whether their survival was a miracle and whether Jules should quit. Vincent goes off to the bathroom and, while he is gone, Pumpkin and Honey Bunny from the beginning declare it a robbery and it is evident that we have circled in time back around to the beginning. The couple hold up the diner, but, when they get to Jules, he takes Pumpkin hostage and devises a plan for everybody to leave. Jules allows the couple to leave alive with all the wallets, then the two hitmen follow quickly behind them before any police can show up.

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I put a spoiler warning at the top, but there is so much to this film that there is no way you could spoil everything. I find new things to enjoy about this movie each time that I watch it and the watch count has to be at least two dozen times at this point. This film is so rich with allusion and homage to movies of the past that you might never see everything. Tarantino is truly a lover of old films and he worked every reference he could into this film. This is truly like candy for a cinephile.

I have, however, had a love hate relationship with this movie: I love this movie and I hate it when people tell me it is too violent. There was a lot of negative response to the films toxic masculinity, romancing crime culture, incredible amount of swearing, drug use, extreme gun violence, and very adult themes. There is a very famous interview between Quentin Tarantino and Jan Wahl in which she accuses him of using excessive violence and he tells her it is because it is a lot of fun to watch. His stylistically gory violence stems from exploitation films of the past and there is an established audience that enjoys it. He makes his movies for himself and this group of people.

Kind of like the comedy of Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, and George Carlin, you have to wade through a sea of swearing to find the comedic banter. The things that Jules and Vincent say to each other are some of the funniest stuff I have ever heard, but you really have to pay attention. Their attempts to express their feelings while maintaining their hard exterior persona is ridiculous. This is probably why many people enjoy the scenes with Vincent and Mia: there is a lot more courtesy which reduces the tirade of cursing.

The violence is very very over the top, but it is no where near the level of gore that Tarantino has become known for over the years. I must admit that he likes his torture scenes and this film is no exception. I would like to note how clever the torture scene with Butch and Marsellus is because they are both tied up and facing camera so only the audience can see the mischief that is being prepared behind them.

The soundtrack for the film is well worth mentioning as it also pays homage to 50s, 60s, and 70s exploitations films. There is a lot of silence in the film with sudden bursts of fast paced music that help with transitions. Most famous is the intro music after diner prologue, a surf rock classic by Dick Dale and The Del Tones called Misirlou. It is pure speed guitar riff along the lines of Wipeout and transitions the scene perfectly. Take a listen for yourself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIU0RMV_II8

Maybe the biggest thing about this film and Tarantino in general is the inspiration of the slick gangster dialogue. There had been a push for more melodramatic dialogue or the complete absence of much talking. Tarantino added in this slick, fast moving comedic dialogue that is said over extreme violence and adult situations. Marsellus Wallace talks about having some crack heads torture a man to death immediately after being raped in a basement. The hitmen talk about appropriate manners while cleaning out brains from the back of a car. Jules talks about the meaning of the bible during a robbery. Everything seems out of place in the real world but perfectly acceptable in Tarantino’s world. This is probably why I have no problem with the violence in the film.

So should this film be on the AFI top 100? Absolutely. It is an homage to film history while simultaneously introducing a sub genre that mixes current dialogue and exploitation touches to grindhouse action. It is fascinating and fun. Would I recommend this movie? If you are old enough. I can’t emphasize enough how fun I find this film, but I cannot deny that it is filled with adult situations like drug usage followed by driving, secret dungeon rape, and cold blooded murder with no consequences. If you can differentiate between Tarantino’s world and the real world, then this is great. If you can’t, then maybe try something else with slick dialogue like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

#miserlou #pulp fiction #samuel l jackson #Quentin Tarantino #john travolta #violence #action #90s movies #academy award winner #dialogue #cinematography #introvert #introverts

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the-ghost-and-the-writer · 5 years ago

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NSFW Alphabet-Wade Wilson

The boy! I love him. He’s perfect and he’s slightly messed up but I love him for it

18+ F!Reader

Actually his reaction to this probably

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He’ll take a moment to silently (for once) admire you until you say something and then he’ll grin and say some out there comment that turns into a lewd ramble about what you’d just done

At first he was apprehensive to cuddle unless he was dressed in at least a shirt so you wouldn’t have to feel his scorched body, but with your gentle reassurances he’s more open to a near-instant snuggle session

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

With you, everywhere. Every part of you is amazing and gorgeous to him and he has to really wonder why someone as beautiful as you would want a guy like him, with a face like spoilt lasagne

Evidently, it took some time to convince him that any part of him was worth a second thought. He’s getting more used to being secure with himself but doesn’t particularly have a favourite just yet

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

If you’ll let him, he adores the sight of his cum on your stomach or your face. It’s a special type of dirty for him, especially when you’d run a finger through the mess and lick it off

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Wade has very few secrets, dirty or otherwise, and he will gladly share any thought at all that he has at the slightest provocation

However, since his mutation kicked in and his pain tolerance went up almost as much as his healing factor, he’s been quite tempted to try a bit more kinky stuff. More risky, harsh things

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He is quite experienced, with many different types of people all across the gender spectrum in all sorts of situations. That doesn’t make him any less excited about being with you any way you’d like it, of course.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

While of course he’ll never say no to missionary or simply bending you over a table or the couch or a counter (the classics are classics for a reason), he does have a preference for the more challenging positions, more for bragging rights

Any possible way the two of you can bend yourselves without causing injury, he’ll try to somehow turn it to sex...which does sometimes cause some injury.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He’s never 100% serious, that’s not possible for Wade. There’s bound to be a few one-liners or sarcastic quips or comments to a person who isn’t there, but he won’t go too far with them in certain situations

Light-hearted is his favourite tone for sex anyway, since not only does he love to make you smile and laugh at any chance he can, but he’s slightly worried that having it be too serious will put him in his own head too much and he’ll get self-conscious

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

There really is none, since the experimentation

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Wade has a special idea of romance. A mix of overly cheesy and completely pornographic.

He’ll fuck all levels of coherency and possible movement out of you, in a candlelit room on a bed covered in rose petals and filled with gentle music. Or he’ll take you to a beautiful wood cabin out in the middle of nowhere and rut you into the ground in front of the most picturesque view you could ever ask for.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Any moment he needs to, he’ll masturbate, regardless of if you’re going to get down to It or not.

He also uses it as a build-up to the main event and keeps him ready for you while he’s waiting for you. Sometimes he’ll try to entice you into sex by showing you just how desperate he is for you by touching himself and whining for your attention

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

The Merc with a mouth is also the Merc with a multitude of kinks. Evidently. His more noticeable ones are post-fight sex, mutual masturbation, and having you touch him

Post-Fight; Not make up sex, though damn he loves that as well, but coming back to you from a fight or freshly killing a guy that probably deserved it. If it went good or bad, it doesn’t matter to him because either way he wants you in any room and any position that’s quickest so he can get all adrenaline out while simultaneously celebrating that he has you still

Mutual Masturbation; Watching you do almost anything can rile Wade up, and he’ll never have enough of seeing you naked so watching you touch yourself is enough to fry his brain. And that’s not even taking in the fact that you’d touch yourself at the sight of him. You getting off on him getting off makes it feel so much better than just jerking off

Touch; A majority of the physical contact he gets is either fleeting or violent, so he loves when you take the time to check over him after a fight despite his healing factor or you insist on smothering him in kisses when he’s down. For a minute, it helps him forget his situation and his insecurities and makes him only want you for as long as he can

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Anywhere he can have you, most of the time. The X-mansion, Blind Al’s place, your shared place, the back room or a quiet corner booth of Sister Margret’s. He’s even brought you on a few missions where you end up having a risky fuck in a dangerous back-alley

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Just you. Having you around, and you wanting him, and you being there for him is enough

Of course, the adrenaline of a fight gets him riled up just as much though more noticeably

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Hurting you to severely is a definite no-go for him, as it anything too reminiscent of what he went through with Francis

Otherwise, any non-con roleplay and toilet stuff is also off limits

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Though he is by no means selfish, he does prefer receiving over giving. Having you so willing to get him off in such a way only enhances how good it feels. He always wants to finish in your mouth and he’ll sometimes ask you to beg him for it

He’ll eagerly return the favour whenever you want him to, or for any little excuse. He’s good at it as well, he can have you on the edge in record time and he always seems to relish that knowledge

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He almost always goes quite slow, to make sure he can fuck you deeper or rougher and really pick you apart. Even when you might get caught, he rarely goes faster than his usual pace

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Quickies are almost as good as proper sex to him. Sometimes better but it depends on the occurrence. Any possible moment, he’s offering to take you aside for a bit of ‘tension relief’ regardless of how many times you’ve already had sex that day

Even if it’s totally the wrong time, or there’s no semi-private place, he’ll still offer

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He’s down for trying almost everything and he’ll approach every new experience with the same enthusiasm each time

Evidently, he won’t push you to take any risks that you aren’t certain about, but he will try to encourage you in his usual way

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Since the Incident with Francis, his stamina in all ways has improved

He’s borderline insatiable, able to easily go for four rounds before he’s spent, and with that he could keep you up almost all night

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He owns a few, a small collection, or a couple vibrators and dildoes as well as one or two masturbation toys. There is a strap-on hidden somewhere, half forgotten

All the toys are tried and tested, he is very willing to use each one on himself or have you use them in any way

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Wade teases, mostly, by giving you almost enough but not quite to make you whine and beg

Other times, it’s the typical denial and delay teasing also but only when he’s feeling more playful

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He is unashamed with his moans and whines, any little noise that wants to get out, and can be loud but he can’t see the issue

However, when there are complaints, he can get obnoxiously louder out of spite.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Because of his situation, his insecurities, he gets quite easily jealous over any possible sexual interest you could show to anyone else. He trusts you implicitly, he just thinks that he isn’t the most physically appealing person

To take that jealousy out of his system, he makes you cum in the nearest possibly-private place he can, hoping that whoever it is that is causing the jealousy might come by and see that they have no chance

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

As almost everyone who knows him will know, he’s got a pretty big dick. While they know from his bragging and overly descriptive recollections of nights or even hours before, you know from the ache that lasts for hours after sex

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Wade is always down for sex. He’s insatiable, having gotten you both in trouble multiple times for sneaking away to fuck when you should be focusing on something else

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

When you’re both settled down in bed, he’ll make a point of staying awake after you’ve fallen asleep so he can be more obviously worriedly-overjoyed that he has you in his life and his bed and his heart

Give me requests or give me death. If you want the notifications for when I rise from the dead again, then the tag list is always open.

#wade wilson #wade wilson x reader #deadpool #deadpool x reader #reader fic #Female reader #fanfiction #Admin-Hannah #nfw alphabet #lemon

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my-miraculous-headcanons · 5 years ago

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Kim Possible AU

In which Marinette is in gymnastics, is childhood friends with Adrien, and somehow became an agent-for-hire when someone accidentally dialed her number to call for help instead of actual, professionally trained agents. That’s right, they called a preteen for help, didn’t have the time to call anyone else, and rolled with it.

Also Adrien is a total goofball with a hairless cat. He still has both his parents, who start out overprotective but gradually loosen the reigns when it becomes clear that his friend will keep him safe.

(The reason I put gymnastics and not cheerleading is because I’m pretty sure that’s an exclusively American thing? Besides, gymnastics kind of makes more sense, skillset-wise.)

Origins

• Marinette took gymnastics since she was seven, mainly because her clumsiness had been turning into a bit of a problem. (Parents start to get worried when their child’s having genuine physical difficulty in not hurting themselves. They thought gymnastics would help her learn balance, and also allow her to burn off some of her natural childlike energy.) By the age of eleven, Marinette is the best in her class, and is thinking about entering competitions.

• Adrien is Marinette’s childhood best friend. Along with gymnastics, Marinette also started taking ballet, which is where the two met. Adrien was taking ballet because both his parents had taken it, and also because he thought it would be fun. Since he’d been taking it longer than Marinette, he helped her out in class, and the two have been inseparable ever since.

• Adrien helped Marinette build a website to help get her name out there when they were eleven. They took videos of her doing a couple moves, and added a contact number. Unfortunately, (or, rather fortunately, actually,) Marinette’s number is very similar to a number for a group of agents who do pretty dangerous, life-saving jobs.

• Marinette’s first call is from a man requesting for help at a rather big bank in Paris, not far from her house. Being eleven, she doesn’t really understand that this is probably something she should inform the police, rather than handle herself. So, she and Adrien (who she sneaks out of his house) rush over, and save the day themselves.

• Adrien had videotaped the impressive gymnastics Marinette had pulled off in order to safely get through the security lasers and shut them off. After that video was posted, she started getting calls on a much more regular basis, all from people in need of help. It wasn’t the sort of attention she was looking for when making the website, but she can’t deny she doesn’t love her new job.

The Present

• By the ages of 16, Marinette and Adrien have travelled all over the world, gaining favors from a bunch of grateful individuals, and are pretty dang famous. They aren’t necessarily given special privileges at school, but if things are urgent, then they’re allowed to leave and makeup missing work online.

• Adrien is still a model, still plays piano, still takes Chinese, and still does a lot of different sports. On his own, he’s actually pretty famous. However, in this world, it’s pretty much impossible for him to display the ‘perfect, gentlemanly son’ persona when most of the world has seen videos of him screaming at the top of his lungs, running around in his underwear because somehow his pants got pulled off again. Yeah, he’s a straight A student with the classic, rich people training, but he’s still an utter dork and everyone knows it.

• Marinette, while still taking gymnastics, has lost interest in making it a life career when she already sort of does it already. She’s picked up other interests, one of them being fashion design when Adrien had introduced her to what goes on behind the scenes in his workplace. She’s good at designing stylish, yet very practical outfits, and made uniforms for herself and Adrien for their ‘side jobs’ as agents-for-hire.

• While Adrien isn’t necessarily incompetent, he’s more of the ‘do first, think later’ type of guy when it comes to their dynamic, which often leaves Marinette to do the planning and problem-solving. At this point, it’s kind of abundantly obvious that, while Adrien is academically more profound, Marinette is vastly more analytical, and probably has a ridiculously high IQ if they ever bothered to check.

• There isn’t a main villain. Papillion doesn’t exist because Gabriel is completely aware of what his son is doing, still has his darling wife, and has literally no reason to waste his money on illegal activities. He’s a big name in the fashion world, it’s not like he’s looking for world domination or something stupid like that.

• (I’m sure you’re wondering why the fuck Gabriel Agreste would let his only son go off on dangerous adventures like that on a daily. Well, he didn’t at first, but over time Marinette proved to be a more effective bodyguard than Adrien’s actual bodyguard, so he became more chill. Also, Adrien’s the face of his company, and with all the brave and daring things he’s done alongside Marinette, his popularity ratings are through the roof. Son has fun, is well-taken care of, still performs exceptionally in all his extracurriculars, and does well by the family business? It’s a win-win on all sides.)

• I would make Lila Shego, except Shego is an actually likeable villain who’s genuinely smart, badass, and fun to watch. So, idk who Shego is, definitely not any of the catty girl rivals Marinette has to put up with, but you can’t have a Kim Possible AU without Shego, so she’s definitely in there.

• Max is probably Wade. Honestly makes the most sense, but here’s a suggestion: Max and Kim are the ones who contact Marinette when she has a mission. Max is great with numbers, technology, etc, but Kim’s expertise in completely random shit like sports, terrain, and necessary gear needed for specific situations makes him a valuable asset to the team.

• We all know who Chloé is going to be, I don’t even need to say it but I will anyways. Say hello to our Bonnie, everyone. She was probably in that ballet class with Marinette and Adrien too, years ago.

• While Tom Dupain is still a baker, in this AU Sabine Cheng went on to pursue her dream as a literal rocket scientist, and succeeded. So, Sabine is basically Dr. James Timothy Possible.

• Adrien has a hairless cat named Plagg. His father is allergic to fur, and Adrien’s allergic to feathers, so he was sort of limited to pets like fish or lizards, neither of which he really wanted. He found Plagg outside gorging himself on camembert by a dumpster. Having been previously a street cat, Plagg’s growth was stunted, so he stayed pretty small.

• Luka is obviously Josh Mankey. Marinette and Luka date for a while, but eventually break up on mutual terms due to him not being able to handle some of the dangerous things that pop up in her life often. While he doesn’t panic when things go south, he’s not really physically equipped to protect himself... He’s a musician, not a fighter.

• Listen, y’all can fight me, Marinette’s longest relationship before finally getting together with Adrien is going to be with Kagami. Kagami handles the dangerous things that go on in Marinette’s life perfectly well, and they date for several months. Eventually, they do break up, but still remain good friends. (This is the period in which Adrien realises he’s jealous of Kagami, and has feelings for Marinette.)

Get Together

• For those of you who haven’t watched Kim Possible, (and honestly what the hell are you even doing with your life if you haven’t,) Kim and Ron get together at a school dance (prom, but I don’t think prom exists in France,) and share a slow dance with each other. Uhhh so basically think Despair Bear, except Adrien and Marinette are wearing fancy clothes, just got together, and share a kiss in the end.

• Marinette had recently broken up with Kagami before the dance, and is a little upset over not having a date when she already made herself a dress. Adrien is dealing with his realisation that he likes Marinette romantically, but keeps quiet about it and gives her a shoulder to cry on because she’s hurt, and he’s not going to take advantage of that. He suggests they go to the dance together as friends.

• Kagami is there, and Adrien confronts her as to why she had broken up with the most amazing girl in Paris. She tells him that she came to the conclusion that, though she loved Marinette with all her heart, Marinette clearly had someone else as her #1. Kagami was sick of having to compete for that position when the other person didn’t even need to try. Adrien is left baffled by this.

• Marinette overhears this as she’s walking over to ask Adrien for a dance. Kagami looked past Adrien’s shoulder, directly into Marinette’s eyes, and smiled knowingly. Then she walked away, sipping at her drink.

• Adrien turns around, pretty green eyes latching onto hers, and Marinette immediately understands what Kagami had meant. A slow song comes on, and she asks him to dance. Things fall in place from there.

• (Of course, after they’ve kissed and become a couple, some dumb villain is going to inevitably crash the party and try to kill Marinette, as usual, but they deal with it like they always do.)

Alright that’s the end! This was an almost completed draft of mine I had, and since I’ve been lacking on content recently, I thought I’d quickly polish this up a bit and post it. I also have some other completed things I could polish up on, but eh, don’t feel like it right now. Enjoy!

(And maybe tell me how you’d imagine your favourite KP episode would go with Marinette and Adrien as the protagonists instead!)

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sasuhinasno1fan · 4 years ago

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The Elf Prince?- Adrien AUGreste Day 31

Here it is, the end. I didn’t do as many prompts as I had wanted orginally. A lot of stalls and getting blocked. I know this one was mostly refered to what Marinette’s name for Adrien in the alternate timeline was, but I wanted to do something different. Not that the angst level isn’t any lower and I left it on a clifhangger, mostly because it’s getting close to 12 am and I wanted to post this. If it gets enough love, I might continue it. Anyway, thanks to @adrienaugust for making this event. I’m getting more into writing ML fics and hopefully I can continue. I’ll be on the lookout for other events. Also, thanks to @write-it-motherfuckers for the prompt I used, which is the first chunk of this fic. My Prince

Adrien knew he should have fled the moment he heard them arrive, and usually Adrien did, but something about this time made Adrien linger.

Though people were generally a mix of nervous and excited when they came through town, his grandparents were downright paranoid and almost aggressive. Adrien had grown up hearing tales of their beauty and power from other townsfolk, but his grandparents themselves, outright forbid the topic at home, except for the time they would spend obsessively reminding Adrien to stay hidden from them, as the time of their arrival drew nearer.

Whilst everyone knew that they could be incredibly dangerous, they also knew that they could be incredibly kind, in a way most humans failed to master. Adrien always found it strange that his grandparents were so insistent on telling him that they were just plain evil, and would do terrible things if they ever saw him specifically.

There was always fear and paranoia when they talked about them, but somehow Adrien knew their fear wasn’t because of what they claimed it was. Their fear was fuelled by something else, he was sure of it, though what that something was, he didn’t know.

Adrien knew he was different to everyone else in the village, both in appearance and in nature. There were things he could do that he knew the townsfolk couldn’t, things that he was never to show anyone, lest he “risk his safety”. It was the same reason he was always told to keep his hair and eyes covered, as they gave away how different he was quite easily.

The older Adrien got however; the less things seemed to add up.

Adrien was always coaxed into using his abilities to help his grandparents around the place, something that Adrien did happily as it made life so much easier for them, but the older he got, the more he noticed that their honeyed words tasted foul in his mouth, something about their “Loving” words and affections making his stomach curdle, though he was always careful to hide such reactions. More and more, their excuses and reasoning seemed to sit poorly within him, his faith in them growing weaker with every word, much to his distress.

It wasn’t the first time they had been away while the others were due to pass through town, nor was it the first time that Adrien had been in town so close to the time they would be passing through. It was however the first time that both of those things coincided.

He had intended to be quick in town, gathering what he needed before he would hurry back home to safety. Being in town was usually something he could handle, but with everyone eagerly flooding the main area of town, his shy nature was sending his anxiety into overdrive.

Unfortunately, he had no choice but to wade through the crowds, as most other shops would shut during this time, only the shops and stalls along the main road remaining open and active during the celebration. Every three months this would happen, and the whole town never failed to go overboard with excitement each and every time.

It was as Adrien was weaving between bodies, headed for the little bridge off to one side that led to his grandparents’ house, that he heard the people cheer excitedly, heralding their arrival. For once he found himself hesitating, listening closely as he heard the faint march of the others growing closer.

Giving into his desire finally, he turned back towards the main street, peering around the corner of one of the stalls hesitantly. As covered as Adrien always was, it wasn’t like it would be hard to vanish into the crowd and run home if he was spotted somehow.

It couldn’t hurt to stay a little while….right?

From the stories he’d heard, most elves were haughty and didn’t care for humans. Their village was on the edge of the forest that made up home of the elves they lived with. They traded with them and since he was a child, the elves protected them from fearsome creatures. Normal bandits and such, they could take care of, but creatures that were turned into stories to teach children to behave, those where the ones the elves protected them from. There was one particular one, one they called an Akuma that was constantly plaguing them. this creature would spirit away someone, be it human of elf, and pray on their worst emotions. The one they felt the strongest at the moment would be at the forefront as their whole appearance changed and was corrupted. The elves would send out a group that he heard were called the Miraculous, to use their abilities to release the person from it’s hold. They told the village that the creature was under the control of a dark wizard who called himself Hawkmoth. There’d been few times when the group faced him directly. The village was always tense when those fights happened. His grandparents always seemed tense but in a different way. Not worried about the group not coming back, worried that they would. It made the feeling in his stomach worse when that happened.

“Manon!” a cry echoed. He watched as Nadja, the human who had the most interaction with the elves, ran towards one of the horses. Her daughter was sitting in front of an elf girl, maybe about the same age he was, who was dressed in ladybug colours. “Are you alright?”

The girl carefully let Manon down into her mother’s arms. Children where always more susceptible to an Akuma’s lure.

“She’s alright. She said she wanted to spend more time with you.”

Adrien could hear Nadja apologizing to her daughter.

“I wonder if they found out anymore about their prince’s whereabouts. These attacks have been going on for 16 years now, but they’ve gotten worse in the recent years.” He heard a villager asked.

“You can’t help but feel for them. elf prince just disappeared when he’s a year old and before they could even go and try to look for him, these attacks start up. They could have blamed us, you know, but they didn’t.”

Prince? He didn’t know the elves were missing a prince.

“Yes, it was all thanks to me that she was saved.” A blonde elf sat upon her golden horse, looking proud of herself, even with her companions shaking their heads and hiding their faces in their hands.

“There goes Lady Chloe again.”

“Oh, be nice. You know she has the most to lose when they don’t find information. She was apparently very close to the prince. She was with him when he disappeared. I know it must be hard for her, knowing she was there and knowing there was nothing she could do.”

He’d really never heard of the missing prince and watching the blonde elf preach on her greatness, it almost seemed impossible to believe. But he’d do that, the whole acting a certain way to hide what he was really feeling. He decided it was time to go when he bumped into the edge of the stall he’d been hiding behind. Produce fell from their carefully constructed towers and caught the attention those standing close.

“Hey!”

He didn’t stick around long, taking off for the bridge to home.

“I’ve got him!”

“Chloe, wait! That’s just a villager!”

He took a quick glance to see the blonde elf chasing after him on her horse. He ducked through the trees, letting his hand brush against one of them. he only looked long enough to see a stream of black spread where he was touching and heard the tree groan as it started to fall. He heard the elf let out a yelp before he started to hear her yell at someone called Marinette.

He used his magic in public, in front of elves. He hoped they didn’t come looking for him. They wouldn’t be able to anyway. The villagers didn’t know where his grandparents’ home was. He hoped.

__________________

Luka watched Marinette go chasing after Chloe. The villager she’d gone after didn’t have the sound of deceit or anything worth really chasing after in their heart. They did have fear. Fear of them? he knew few of the villagers weren’t trusting of them, but they never came out to these processions.

“Should we be worried?” Nino asked.

“Not about them. What Chloe might do to them, maybe. But Marinette will catch up to her, don’t worry. Who was that anyway?”

“No one really knows what his name is.” Nadja said, stilling holding Manon close. “His lives with his grandparents. He never really leaves the house except to come get things from the market. His grandparents are very protective and they never seem to like elves very much.”

“How does a whole village never see a person?” Alya asked, “Is he sick?”

“I don’t believe so. Just probably listens to the warnings to not be around you.”

Before anyone else could say anything, Pollen, Chloe’s horse came riding up without her rider. She did follow, on Tikki with Marinette.

“Guys, we have a situation. This villager, did you know he had elven abilities?”

That question seemed to stun the whole village.

“But you just said his grandparents didn’t like elves.” Nino said.

“They don’t! they seem to hold very old tradition looks about you. that can’t be right. Their grandchild couldn’t be an elf.”

“Not according to we saw.” Chloe said, pulling herself back onto Pollen.

“Luka, Alya, Nino and Chloe, we’re going to find him. Everyone else, report back to the Master. Where does he live?”

“Across the bridge and go straight. His grandparents aren’t here.”

“Good, then let’s hope we can get answers before they get back.”

________________

Adrien closed the door, and pulled off his hat that hid his ears and hair. His hair was as blond as that elf’s but when he used his abilities, it started to fade into white and his eyes would turn from green to icy blue. His pointed ears were the same as an elf. His grandparents never said that he was an elf, but it had to be true. But with how his grandparents were, he never felt like he could ask. To use his abilities like that out in the open, he was putting so much at risk. He had the ability to destroy something, like it was rotting at his touch. He could do other things, but that was the one he was always told to never use, because he’d be killed if he was caught. He had no choice then. If he hadn’t blocked that elf, she would have found out who he was. He focused on putting things away, not wanting to risk a lecture if things weren’t perfect when his grandparents came back.

A knock on the door stopped him as he put the rest of the vegetables in it’s bowl. With caution, he put his hat back on and went to the door.

“Who is it?”

“Members of the Miraculous scouting group. You aren’t in any trouble, could you open the door?”

His grandparents were going to kill him. He decided to use his abilities again. He placed his hands on the floor below and watched as a black hole appeared under him and swallowed him. He appeared outside the cottage, hearing the door being knocked on again. He peeked to see 4 of the elves from the procession. He had to hide until they left.

“Are you going to go somewhere?”

He let out a shriek as the voice suddenly spoke in his ear. He spun around to see a dark-haired elf with a snake broach keeping his cloak on. How did he miss him?

The rest of the elves quickly found them.

“Ah ha! We thought you were up to something and we found you.” the blonde one said, reaching up and snatching his hat from his head.

“Chloe! We’re just here to ask questions, not throw accusation around.”

“Gods above. It couldn’t be.”

He realised they were all staring at him, in disbelief. He was about to ask what was wrong when all of them, except the blonde one who kept staring at him, kneeled.

“My prince.”

“Prince?”

“Adrien?” the blonde one asked before throwing herself at him. “Oh Adrien! You’re alive! I can’t believe you’re alive.”

He felt bad for pushing her away but they weren’t making sense. “Wait! How do you know my name and why do you think I’m a prince?”

They all looked surprised at that statement.

“How can you not know? Have you never talked to another elf?” the one in green and with glasses asked.

Right, his ears were showing. “No. my grandparents tell me not to.”

The one in orange, with the flute attached to her back, pulled out a folded piece of parchment. It looked heavy and expensive. She passed it to Adrien who unfolded it and started at the drawing on it.

“Every year on the day of his disappearance, a drawing of Prince Adrien Graham de Vanily is created to show what’d he’d look like.” She touched the top of the parchment and he saw her hair turn orange and her eyes gold. The picture of the Prince, of Adrien, stayed the same but their hair and eyes changed, to white hair, blue eyes and around his hands seemed to glow black.

Just like him. When he used his abilities, usually his hands glowed black. His hair turned to white as snow and his green eyes turned an ice blue.

But he couldn’t be their prince. His grandparents would have told him, wouldn’t they? Or was this the reason they didn’t like elves? Because they thought they’d recognise him?

“I know it sounds strange now but we have full belief that you’re our prince. If you could come to this castle, the Queen would know and could tell us. Please, you have to come with us.”

Go with them? to the home of the elves? He couldn’t.

Then why was his heart aching to accept?

#adrienaugust #adrienaugreste #elf adrien #missing elf prince #elf miracuclass

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commandercoriandersalamander · 5 years ago

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deservingporcupine said: Nooooooo what’s your favorite book?

OH BOY IS IT TIME TO TALK ABOUT ARCHIVIST WASP AGAIN YES IT IS

(you’ve unleashed a demon here my friend)

Archivist Wasp by Nicole Kornher-Stace is probably one of my top five favorite books ever, maybe even top three (and the top three isn’t ranked it’s just Really Good Books). It is constantly slept on. No one has read it. No one has even heard of it! Even though every element is fantastic and likens to a very popular series (in a “oh, you liked that bit? try this book!” way not in a derivative way). It is my life’s work to get people to read this book.

I should put in a Read More because I am going to talk A LOT about it. But- if you like The Abhorsen Trilogy, His Dark Materials, the Hunger Games, Never Let Me Go, Station Eleven, Graceling, any mythology ever, ghosts, supersoldiers, post-apocalypse religion, or the struggle of to what extent you can define yourself versus others define you and the trauma of being both a monster and a savior, you’ll love this book.

-the premise. it’s post-apocalyptic fantasy which is a niche I absolutely love. basically, the world ended generations ago, and no one really knows why or how. but humanity lives in little isolated town-states around the edge of this giant irradiated wasteland. and since the end of the world, ghosts exist.

-after the collapse (and I’m going to talk a lot about the collapse BUT it’s worth noting that the story of the end of the world isn’t a major-major part, like the book is concerned both with looking back and looking forwards, but the story is much more intimate and focused on Wasp and her world rather than The World At Large) this new constellation-based religion popped up. it’s completely unique and AMAZING and integrates so well into the world that you forget you’re still learning about it.

-Wasp was raised by the Catchkeep (what we call Ursa Major) priest. he’s this skeevy old man who raises young girls and every year they fight to the death for the honor of being the Archivist. Wasp is the current Archivist! which is absolutely terrible for her, but the only way out is to die, and the only way to survive is to kill the upstarts.

-the Archivist’s job is to protect the town from ghosts. ghosts can get really angry and mean! and then, to record the ghosts, and watch them and categorize them, in hopes that one of them will reveal how the world ended

-(lemme talk about ghosts for a hot sec. ghosts in this world are basically repeating memories- they’re not really “people”. when you die, your ghost might return, to constantly play out its last moments, but you aren’t aware of the world, you’re not really sentient. ghosts who died violently can become violent, hence the Archivist’s banishing rituals. there has never been a ghost that can talk, so no one has been able to ask the ghosts how the world ended. the theme of repetition, identity, and relation to the world that is inherent in the concept of ghosts is SUPER CENTRAL to the plot and woven so well in.)

-Wasp’s job is really sucky, because she’s incredibly valued by the people of Sweetwater, but she’s also feared and hated. she is kept apart from them, and is basically only ever allowed to interact with the Catchkeep Priest, but she survives on the offerings the people leave outside her door being they are grateful to her for keeping the ghosts away and also terrified of her for being so close to them. this theme- valued monster, monster created and maintained by a society, is central to the book, and I know you’re like “okay, yeah, that’s a theme of a lot of books do, whatever” but the nuance and depth here is incredible.

-Wasp, naturally, wants to escape the Catchkeep Priest, but again, irradiated wasteland, everyone is afraid of her, she has nowhere to go. Wasp is very explicitly a trauma and abuse victim/survivor, and she has guts and bravery without overlooking that or pretending that one cancels out the other.

-Wasp’s entire life is turned upside down when she finds a ghost that can TALK. like, recognize its surroundings, recognize her, and talk to her. like I said, that’s NEVER HAPPENED. completely unprecedented.

-the ghost (who doesn’t have a name) explains that in his old life, he was a soldier. and that he had a comrade, Kit Foster, who died as well, and that he’s trying to find her ghost, so that they can survive the underworld together. he wants Wasp’s help. in return, he will get her away from the Catchkeep Priest.

-lemme talk about the ghost because he is a completely tragic figure in such a compelling way. ghosts get weaker and weaker the longer they’re dead, and he’s been dead a long time. he doesn’t remember most of his life. he doesn’t remember his own name. he remembers that he is a monster, in a way that directly parallels Wasp, because they’re both created soldiers people are afraid of but also need, but while Wasp has the chance to go forwards and grow, he’s dead, he can’t. ghosts are incredibly stagnant.

-he wants to find Kit because he’s forgetting who he is. he hopes that if he finds her, they can remind each other of who they are. when the underworld decays them, they can pull back and remember each other. remember the theme I said about defining yourself versus others defining you, and how it plays into the idea of an important monster? yeah here it is again!

-let me say really explicitly though: I know what you’re thinking. Wasp and the ghost are going to hook up. Mild spoiler but worth knowing: THEY DO NOT. yeah you heard me. Kit and the ghost aren’t romantic either. this is a book about trusting other people enough to know and define you when you can’t and IT DOESN”T HAVE ROMANCE. platonic, important, deep and trusting relationships, boyos! I care so much about this.

-so the trip through the underworld. the underworld is such an amazing setting here. the closest thing I’ve read is His Dark Materials underworld, full of ghosts and emptiness. it’s an expanse of old flotsam of memories and it’s always trying to destroy you. Wasp and the ghost have to wade through this place, trying to figure out what does and doesn’t belong to them.

-Wasp, as the Archivist and wielding a special ghost sword, is able to enter the memories of the ghost. specifically, the memories that he has forgotten. doing this is killing her, but she’s already in the underworld, so... the book switches between Wasp and the ghost’s journey through Hades and flashbacks to the ghost’s childhood with Kit Foster, as medical experiments and supersoldiers in a world-ending war. you start to realize that the ghost thinks he betrayed Kit, but can’t remember how.

-look, it’s just incredibly. the themes are woven into everything, the parallels between Wasp and the ghost are superb, the symbolism is constant without being heavy-handed. you’re reading a really engaging story, not an essay about identity with some story trappings, it doesn’t get preachy, it’s just really well done. Wasp and the ghosts are both realistic, flawed, hurting characters trying to imagine some kind of ending for themselves. this book sneaks up on you with how painful (in the good book way!) it is to read. and then the ending! I’m not gonna say anything! I won’t! But the ending!

-the sequel (which is the book I lost, RIP) does the Really Great Sequel Thing where it continues the themes and struggles without invalidating the progress the characters made in the last book. it also confirms what was hinted at in the first book, which is that Wasp is a woman of color, and so that’s neat. she’s also a realistic example of someone with PTSD and chronic pain. plus: still no romance, still incredibly important and complete platonic relationships. and you learn more about other towns and the gods!

-I will say, on first reading, the writing style took me a sec to adjust to. Wasp’s POV (it’s third person, but completely centered on her viewpoint) has the blind spots and anger that you’d expect from first person, and it can be weird to adjust. it’s also very jerkily written, which sounds like an insult, but it’s not, it absolutely works with Wasp’s voice and the setting, but it takes a few chapters to click with your brain.

-have I dressed up like the Archivist for Halloween? oh you fuckin bet I have.

#Archivist Wasp #Latchkey #Nicole Kornher-Stace #okay so I don't actually know how to reply to a reply forgive me #lol none of you were expecting this level of intensity but I literally cannot lightly mention this book #I either say nothing or I Go Off #this is actually me editing myself to avoid walls of text (failed that one) and spoilers

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thatfanficstuff · 6 years ago

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The Light in my Darkness - 3

Pairing: Almost Clint x reader

Warnings: language (I won’t be listing that after this chapter. Just assume from now on.) discussions of a not so normal contract.

A/N: This was supposed to be a short chapter. And this is not how this was outlined to go AT ALL. I blame the reader and Clint for this one.

***

The next day you stood in front of the Hawkeye International building and shielded your eyes as you gazed up at it. You’d been here before with Wanda, but this was the first time visiting on your own. Taking a deep breath, you steeled your nerves and stepped through the door. After giving your eyes a minute to adjust, you made your way to the front desk to get a visitor’s badge.

Once you showed your ID, the rest of the process was hassle free as you were on the permanent access list. Clint had seen to that after the third time you’d shown up with Wanda unexpectedly and they’d had to track him down to get permission for you to visit. You smiled at the memory as you clipped the badge they gave you to your clothes. Clint had gone off on an absolute tirade. It had been clear that he understood the need for security but didn’t care for the process behind it much.

According to Wanda, her dad was still very much the soldier with an idea and some well-connected friends, as opposed to the typical CEO. Clint Barton had served in the special forces and had been a member of the US archery team. His brilliant mind had combined the two into a business. His company specialized in survival gear. A collapsible bow had been their first product and from there they’d just continued to grow.

You also knew that Hawkeye had combined with Stark Industries to create a line of prosthetics aimed at soldiers and athletes that would enable them to continue to do the things they thought they would no longer be able to. That was due to Bucky Barnes, whom had served with Clint and lost an arm. Wanda said he did everything with his new arm he could do with the old. Sometimes more.

Lost in your thoughts, you arrived at the top floor quickly and had to reach out a hand to stop the door from closing on you. You shook your head and walked down the hall to Clint’s office. You’d been awake half the night going over everything you knew about Clint and his company. He had to be offering you a job, right? Why else would he want to see you? Of course, if you didn’t have a giant crush on the man in question, you probably wouldn’t be so nervous.

His assistant Wade ran his eyes over you as you approached and gave you a tight smile when you stopped in front of his desk. “Can I help you?” It didn’t matter how many times you came here, this man never remembered you.

“Y/N Y/L/N. I’m here to see Clint Barton.” Of course, you are. This is his office. Damn it, Y/N. Get yourself together. “He’s expecting me.”

He blinked and kept that fake smile plastered to his face. “I am aware.” He picked up his phone and pressed a button, keeping his eyes locked on you the entire time. “Boss, your guest is here. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Yes, sir.”

The yes, sirs continued as the office door opened. Clint looked between you and Wade with a frown. “Wade. I’m not even on the phone anymore. What the hell are you doing?”

He hung up the phone and laced his fingers together while keeping that stupid expression on his face. “Nothing, boss.”

You bit your lip to keep from laughing as Clint closed his eyes and shook his head. “Go to lunch, Wade.”

“It’s only 11:00.”

“Lunch, Wilson.” Clint’s voice was little more than a growl.

“I think I’ll just go to lunch.”

You and Clint watched Wade disappear down the hall. When you turned back toward him, you found Clint fighting a grin. He stepped back and opened the door wide. “Come on in, sweetheart.”

Your cheeks heated with the endearment which was stupid but you couldn’t help it apparently. He closed the office door behind you and steered you to a chair with a hand on your back. His thumb rubbed lightly back and forth which only served to make your face heat more. Once you were both settled in your seats, Clint laced his hands together on his desk and looked you over.

Honestly, it had been awhile since you’d seen him for more than a few minutes at a time so you took the opportunity to look him over as well. You were used to seeing him in jeans and t-shirts or dress shirts with the sleeves rolled up and he seemed out of place in the suit to you. But damn did he wear it well. Realizing you’d been staring for perhaps a beat too long, you tore your gaze from him to look out the window.

After a moment, he cleared his throat. “I assume you’re wondering why I told Wanda to have you come see me.”

“A bit, yeah. I mean I assume it has something to do with everything going on right now.” You met his eyes briefly before looking down. “I wish she hadn’t told you about that.”

“What? Why?” He seemed genuinely confused but you still couldn’t bring yourself to meet his gaze.

You didn’t answer and it wasn’t long before a pair of well-dressed legs and designer shoes filled your vision as Clint came around the desk to stand in front of you. Now you were even more embarrassed than you had been before. Him crouching in front of you and placing a hand under your chin to lift your head didn’t help that any. His clear blue-green eyes searched yours. “Talk to me, Y/N.”

It wasn’t a request. You wiped a hand down the top part of your face and huffed out a breath. “It’s just embarrassing.”

He straightened and leaned against the front of his desk. He crossed his arms over his chest and you couldn’t help but notice the way it pulled the fabric of his coat tight across his shoulders. You bit your lip and looked away from him. “What on earth do you have to be embarrassed about? None of this is your fault.”

You let out a laugh. “Try telling that to my father. He’d say this is entirely my fault.”

Clint arched a brow and pursed his lips. “Yeah, well… It’s probably best if we leave my opinion of your father out of the conversation.”

You hummed in agreement and left it at that. “So, why did you wish to see me, Mr. Barton?”

His eyes seemed to darken as they ran over you again and his tongue darted out to trace his bottom lip. Finally, he cleared his throat. “You haven’t called me anything but Clint for years, Y/N.” His voice was low, rough.

It was true, you hadn’t. Why it slipped out now, you had no idea. Well, maybe you had a bit of one. The corner of your mouth kicked up in a grin and you hoped he didn’t notice the way your cheeks heated. “It’s the suit.”

He glanced down in surprise as if just realizing what he was wearing. When he looked back up, he was grinning. “This is a bit different than what you usually see me in.” He tilted his head. “Does it meet with your approval?”

You sucked in a breath as your eyes widened. Why would he ask you that? Why would he care what your opinion was? Your gaze ran over him of its own accord before you met his gaze again. “It’s nice. Not my favorite look on you, but it holds its own.”

His brows lifted. “And what exactly might your favorite look for me be?”

You knew the moment the words left your mouth that they were a mistake. You shook your head instead of answering. “Why am I here, Clint?”

His lips twitched and he glanced down briefly. When he looked back to you, you saw a spark of something in his eye you couldn’t identify. “I have a proposition for you.”

You brushed aside his odd wording. “Like a job?”

“Not remotely.”

Your brow furrowed. “Then what?”

He sighed. “I am about to tell you some things that I prefer you not repeat to anyone. Including Wanda. Normally I’d have you sign something before we had this conversation, but I’ll accept your word.”

“I won’t say anything,” you replied with no hesitation.

“I haven’t dated anyone in years,” he started.

You frowned. That wasn’t true at all. You’d seen some of the women he dated, compared yourself to them. Each and every one of them had been gorgeous.

Clint chuckled at your expression. “Never play poker, Y/N. Your emotions are written all over your face.”

You barely resisted the urge to roll your eyes. “All right. If you know what I’m thinking then explain.”

“I had agreements with those women. Contracts.”

Your eyes went wide. “So, they were escorts?”

“Absolutely not,” he was quick to protest with a shake of his head. “It’s not about the sex. It’s about the relationship.”

It must have been obvious that you were confused as hell because he looked at you and sighed before pinching the bridge of his nose. “Okay, look… Do you remember when you and Wanda were in high school and that kid Joel found out Rumlow was your dad?”

Your lip curled in disgust automatically at the memory. “He tormented me from the day he met me and all of a sudden he wanted to date me. Asshole.”

He smirked. “Exactly. Now imagine that same scenario only you are well past marriageable age and everyone knows precisely who you are and can estimate how much money you have. You know I made my fortune. I didn’t grow up with money. There was a time I didn’t understand the lengths people will go to get it. I was naïve about a woman once. I won’t let it happen again.”

By the end of his little spiel, his smile had faded entirely and his words were clipped. Whatever had happened to him, must have been brutal. You wondered if Wanda even knew. If she did, she’d never mentioned anything about it. “And what does this have to do with me?”

“I recently terminated my contract with Sharon. I need a new companion and I am offering that position to you.”

You blinked several times then licked your lips. You should refuse outright, but you always were too curious for your own good. “And what does that mean exactly?”

Despite the fact that he was the one offering you the position, Clint seemed slightly stunned that you hadn’t just turned him down. “You accompany me to events. We go on dates. Spend time together if we choose. As far as everyone else is concerned, we are dating and I am unavailable. In return, I take care of you.”

“Take care of me?”

He nodded and ran a hand through his hair. “I will pay for all your living expenses, including school. You would need to leave your job at the diner. School will take up enough of your time without adding a job to the mix. If you still want to work, I can find you something here so you can be off when I need you to be.”

You hopped to your feet and paced the floor, glancing at him occasionally as you processed what he’d just said to you. It couldn’t be that simple. “I feel like there’s a catch I’m missing.”

Clint shook his head. “No catch, Y/N. It’s a business arrangement. Nothing more.”

Coming to a stop in front of him, you crossed your arms over your chest. “Okay. Then why me? Is this a pity thing?”

His brow furrowed. “Pity?”

You shrugged. “I’ve seen the women you go out with. They’re gorgeous. Sophisticated. I’m just…not. Yes, things kind of suck for me right now, but I can deal with it. I don’t need your charity, Clint Barton.”

He reached out and grasped your waist to pull you closer. One hand stayed settled on your hip while the other pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. You ignored the tremor that ran up your spine at his touch. “First of all, you are stunning and any man would be proud to have you on his arm. Second, if any pity is involved, it would be you taking pity on me. The women I have had arrangements with in the past have all been beautiful, that’s true. They’ve also been bitchy, shallow, and, in the case of one, just plain stupid. It would be a pleasant change to actually enjoy spending time with the person that’s supposed to my girlfriend.”

“So, we wouldn’t be dating but would appear to be for all intents and purposes?”

“Exactly.” His hand cupped the side of your neck then his thumb ran across your jawline. “We would simply be two adults that enjoy one another’s company spending time together.”

Your heart raced in your chest and it became slightly harder to take a deep breath. “And no sex?”

Pink dusted his cheeks even though he smirked at the question. “If it happens, it happens but it is not a requirement, no. The only place you’ll find it mentioned in the contract is in the non-disclosure portion.”

You licked your lips as your eyes locked on his. “And PDA?”

He nodded slightly. “We do have to be a believable couple but we’re talking hand holding and the occasional kiss. We don’t need to have a full make out session in public.” Laughter colored his words.

Your gaze darted up to meet his. “I’m glad you find me so amusing.”

Both of his hands shifted so he was cradling your face. “I’m not amused. I’m fucking thrilled you’re even considering this.”

And you shouldn’t be. God, you should have run in the opposite direction the moment the conversation started. But now all you could think about was the warmth of his hands. Or what his lips would feel like against yours. Could you really pass up the opportunity to spend time with him? Kiss him? You sucked in a breath for fortification then leaned forward and pressed your lips to his.

There was no hesitation on his part, no question lingering on those sweet, soft lips. He used his hands to tilt your head to the perfect angle and traced your bottom lip with his tongue. When you gasped, he seized the moment to slip his tongue inside your mouth. Your tongues danced around each other, easily finding a rhythm. Your arms wrapped around his neck as you pressed yourself against his front. His fingers slid back to tangle themselves in your hair and hold you in place.

He grew hard against you while you grew warm in all the right places. You’d never had a kiss like this. One that you felt through your whole body, from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. You’d imagined kissing this man dozens of times but never had your brain even come close to this. There was no way you could pass this up. Even if it wasn’t real, you wanted it for however long you could hold on to it.

Finally, you pulled away, tracing your tingling lips with your tongue as you studied his expression. He looked just as dazed as you felt. “Wow.”

“Wow, indeed.” He kissed you again, softer and less needy this time. It lasted only a few seconds which wasn’t nearly long enough in your opinion. “I guess that answers the question of chemistry.”

You laughed at that and pulled away from him completely, praying your legs remained steady long enough for you to leave his office with your dignity intact. “Get me the contract, Clint. I’ll read it and let you know.”

You felt his eyes on you as you left his office and you glanced back just before you passed through the door. His dark gaze burned as he watched you, and the smile he graced you with was downright sinful. Damn.

This was either going to be the best decision you ever made or the worst.

****

Clint’s gaze followed you until you disappeared through the door. That kiss still played in his mind. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d shared a kiss like that with someone. Had he ever? He reached over to pick up his phone and pressed one of the speed dial buttons.

“Odinsons Attorneys at Law,” a soft voice answered.

“This is Clint Barton. I need to speak to one of the brothers, please.”

“Of course, sir.”

Soft music played as he placed was on hold. Thor and Loki Odinson had taken over the firm built by their father decades ago. Their sister Hela was the third partner but her specialty was criminal law so Clint had rarely interacted with her. The brothers, however, handled all his personal issues and headed the legal team if his company was ever taken to court. Hawkeye International had inhouse attorneys though they mainly read forms and wrote press releases.

“Clint, what can I do for you?” The smooth voice of Loki came over the phone.

“I’m going to need another copy of the usual contract. I’ll send you the pertinent details.”

“Finished with Sharon already?” The brothers weren’t only his attorneys, they were his friends.

“She was a bit much.”

Loki hummed in what Clint assumed was agreement. “And the rest?” the attorney asked.

Clint pursed his lips in thought. The usual package wasn’t quite right for you. “Get her a card, of course. No limits. Sell the current apartment. I’ll need a new one near the art institute. I’ll send what I’m looking for in the email.”

There was a stretch of silence. “Are you certain it’s wise to give her free reign on your account?”

“Believe it or not, I actually found one I trust.”

“And the apartment? You’ve had it for years. Do you really want to sell it? Perhaps we should hold onto it. We can always obtain the new one for you as well. Rent this one out perhaps in the meantime.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I hate that apartment, Loki. Just sell it and whatever is left there. I’ll send you that email. Let me know what you find ASAP, please.”

He hung up without waiting for a response. His eyes found the door again as he thought of you and that kiss. That was a hell of a kiss. And you’d initiated it. He’d wondered for a long time what your lips would feel like on his and he sure as hell wasn’t disappointed. Even now, he wanted more.

This was either going to be the best idea he’d ever had or the worst.

#clint barton x you #clint barton x reader #hawkeye x reader #hawkeye x you #avengers #clint barton fanfiction #avengers fanfiction #hawkeye fanfiction #sugar daddy au #series #the light in my darkness

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brieannakeogh · 6 years ago

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Ambition, Butter, and Wine- Ch 5

Ambition, Butter, and Wine- Kylo Ren x plus sized reader. Crack! Fic. You’re a new First Order recruit. Trained in the culinary arts at the top schools and they dare make you serve the common folk. What happens when you have the opportunity to serve Lord Ren?

Master List / Previous Chapter

Chapter 5

It was a couple of weeks later and you were moving into your own private suite. You weren’t sure who they kicked out to make room for you, but you felt giddy at imagining the officer’s face thinking he had been downgraded because of a mere cook. Really you hoped it was the officer’s chef who couldn’t cook himself out of a paper bag.

You were still laughing maniacally as you walk into your new room, arms full of clothes that you could barely see over the top of. It wasn’t until you bumped into something in the middle of the room and arms shot out to steady you, that you realized you weren’t alone. Coughing and choking on your own laugh as you stare into the faceless visor in front of you.

“I can see checking that you liked your new location was unnecessary.” You flinched a little hearing the filtered voice, some conditioned response from his reputation. The visor tilted at your reaction and you forced yourself to relax. It was just so different dealing with him in the full get up and cowl too. This man screamed danger. It was great to intimidate his enemies with but you didn’t think he was still trying to intimidate you, at least you hoped not. You were going to have to stay by his side for a very long time and with as much butter you cooked with, you didn’t think your heart could handle the stress.

“No, no this is great sir! Absolutely perfect!” Stepping around him to throw the clothes down onto the bed. “I really wasn’t expecting a queen bed, or the kitchenette.”

“I thought you would use it more wisely then...others that you don’t think so fond of.” The smirk in his voice evident even with the filter. You understood at once that your wish had become a reality. Not only had he provided the room you requested, but snatched it from the officer you despised. Your cheeks hurt from how wide your smile was and another cackle was drawn from you as threw yourself back, landing on the bed with a bounce and a giggle. “I also thought you could use this instead of the main kitchens so you weren’t disturbed.” He continued, ignoring your celebrating.

“Yes sir. Good idea sir.” You let out with a pant once you were worn out.

“I want roast for dinner, so you should get started on that soon.” With that he turned on his heel, the cape behind him billowing out. You didn’t even have a chance to affirm you heard him before he was stomping out of your room.

Three weeks later your second request was fulfilled. A half a dozen layers of clothing, hat, scarf and large boots, saw you wading through the snow outside the base. You had had no reason to go outside since you had arrived so you may have gone a little overboard when you heard about the subzero temperatures. When he told you what the plan was for that day at breakfast, he had stopped you at the door to remind you to dress warmly. Taking him seriously, you were bundled up, but had a hard time moving in the over ankle deep snow. Almost tipping over more than once. You were from a warm planet, what did you know about snow or subzero temps?

Kylo stood out like a black hole on the white and serene landscape. He was leading you to the woods, out of sight of the base. You wondered what the other people on duty thought as they saw you being lead out to who knows where by Kylo. “Most assumed you had displeased me and I’m leading you to your slaughter, just so I don’t have to do paperwork on the body.”

You tripped a little over your feet, startled more on his answering the silent question than the contents of his words. He hadn’t been doing that much lately, skimming your mind. You rarely felt the pressure anymore. You would assume it would be because he was worried about hurting you again, but that was silly.

Chuckling as you regained your footing. “No sir that wouldn’t happen. If I did displease you enough to kill me you would do it openly, in public. Probably in the galley during lunch rush, just to turn everyone’s stomach. What good is a private death if no lessen can be learned from it?”

The weird wheezing that you associated with him laughing through the filter, echoed around. “A warning for your replacement?”

“At that point it would be an inevitability on how the career ends. I don’t think you will kill me for an innocent mistake. If you are that enraged, I would have deserved it, I think. You like me too much otherwise.”

He halts and you take two steps past him, looking back. “My food, of course.” He starts up again.

“You’re getting cocky.”

“I’ve always been cocky. You usually just ignore it when you read my mind.” Another wheezing noise.

Now the two of you are far enough into the woods that you can’t make out the direction of the base without looking for your tracks. It’s completely silent, other than your panting breaths and the steady filtered air flow through his mask. You hadn’t realized how loud just the hum of the machines were on base. The frenzied activity, deafening.

Suddenly a screech tore through the woods and it made you stumble back. Your eyes closed tight waiting on the impact of the ground to your butt, since you knew you couldn’t right yourself, but it never came and you felt a slight pressure on your back. Opening your eyes you see Kylo in front of you with an arm out and his angry red lightsaber lit by his side, humming.

The visor shaking back and forth as the pressure on your back increased, tilting you back up standing. You realized the horrible sound that startled you was his saber activating. You’ve never been close enough to one of his tirades to hear it, but now you understood what all the fuss was about.

“Useless in battle.”

“I’m a chef not a fighter. I never thought I would be out on the field.” Brushing off snow that isn’t there on your clothes just so you don’t have to look up at him from embarrassment.

His visor tilted again studying you. “How are you with a blaster?”

You shrug, which isn’t much movement under all the layers. “I passed the basic test, but since my position didn’t require it, I didn’t try for the advanced.”

“I’ll set you up with more blaster training. You might be exposed to more combat in your current position and I doubt you could run away from a fight.”

Crossing your arms to your chest in indignation. “Is that supposed to be a commentary on my size Lord Ren?”

The snort was clear, even through the mask. “No, your personality.” He clicked the saber off and held it out to you. “You did ask the most powerful force user in the galaxy to let you destroy something with his lightsaber.”

You cleared your throat and brought your scarf over your mouth and nose a bit more to hide your face, before reaching out to take the offered weapon. He maneuvered you by the shoulders to stand in front of a stump. It was a big stump, about half wide as you were tall and it came up to a little above your waist. “Now,” He says very close behind you, the warmth at your back appreciated. “You must understand that I created this weapon, it is in tune to me. It shouldn’t fight you, but if it starts to feel off...or odd, I don’t know how it would feel to a non force user, make sure to turn it off and drop it at once.”

Well that was a scary speech. “I didn’t know they could have minds of their own.” You chuckled nervously.

And now the wheeze is back and it’s definitely a laugh and definitely louder than it has been before. “You people really have no idea how it works do you?”

“Well excuse me for not being able to fling things around with just a thought! That would be awesome, but we can’t all be special.”

You feel him stiffen behind you, hands tightening on your shoulders. “It is special. Rare. It’s also hard, trying and isolating. I am the best because I have to be. There is no room for second place. I think you understand that as well.”

“Our ambition is only second to our limits, but you seem limitless to me.”

“As I said, you know nothing of the force.”

“But I know how to chop up a stump!” Trying to lighten up the brooding talk with enthusiasm for what you were about to do seemed to work. “So how do you turn this thing on?” Rotating it around the big shiny button obvious when you see it.

“Wait!” He bites out and backs off a safe distance from swing reach, moving to stand more in front of you to watch. “Proceed, and I hope I don’t have to remind you that it cuts through anything, including bone, with ease.”

You carefully hold it out front of yourself, making sure the vents are away from your fingers and the correct end is out. Pushing up on the switch produces that same screeching noise as before. For some reason you expected it to be heavier when lit, but of course that was stupid as it’s just an energy beam without mass. Having all the weight in the hilt makes it seem unbalanced. You gave a few cursory swings around in the air, being careful to not hit any of your limbs. Once you got the feel of it, you gave your best battle cry and started demolishing the defenseless stump in front of you.

There was no push back, very little resistance. Other than the effort it took to swing your arms over your head, you could go on forever. A hot knife through butter flashed in your head. When the thing in front of you resembled more splinters of wood then a stump, you dropped your arms down to your side, flipping the switch to turn it off. You were exhausted, but it wasn’t all just physical. Yes your lungs burned from the cold air from your heavy pants, and your arms were sore, but you felt mentally tired too, like something was drained from you. It was eerily like when he pushed into your mind too far and too hard.

Kylo removed the saber from your hand. You hadn’t even registered he walked back near you. “Did the stump have a name?”

It took you a second to understand what he said, your brain a little fuzzy on adrenaline again. “Carl. Carl the stump.” It’s name wasn’t Carl, but Kylo didn’t question it. “He cheated on Mrs. Stump two years into the marriage, left her destitute. Now Carl is kindling.”

“As I said, personality. I’ll have you start blaster training next week.” You nod absentmindedly. “Let’s go inside, it’s fucking freezing.” Laughing at the man who’s probably in thermal padded armor, you trudge along behind, following your tracks back to the base.

Next Chapter

So I know I’ve been MIA for a while and sorry about that. I’ve been in and out of the hospital and hadn’t done much other than try to deal with that and trying not to freak out about the new complications in my life. I’m starting to feel like myself again so maybe I’ll be able to do a bit of writing and get back on a normal scheduled. For now though it’s just going to be what it is and I’ll try to post chapters when I can.

As always I would love to hear from you all and if you want to be added to the tag list just send me a message.

Thank you all for sticking around!

@stevieang, @albinotigerpython, @paintballkid711, @lilypalmer1987, @tnupsweetpie

#kylo ren x reader #kylo ren #kylo ren x plus sized reader #kylo x reader #plus sized reader #star wars fanfiction

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maliciouslycreative · 5 years ago

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So I’ve mentioned a lot of times over the years that I used to be fandom famous in a small anime fandom and I spent a lot of my time running damage control to an anti however I’ve never actually recounted the whole tale for you all. Buckle up and crack open a lemonade because we’re going on a journey (more under the cut).

The year is 2004, I’m 17, and in my final year of high school. I wrote a lot of fanfic back then, mostly for anime fandoms and around the time I joined Gaia I started posting my fanfic “Several Blows to the Head” which became unexpectedly extremely popular. But before I go forward I feel I should give some back story because some of you will probably get extremely confused very fast otherwise.

For those of you who don’t know about gaia online let me give you some history. Gaia was pretty much THE SHIT back in the mid to late 2000s. It was an anime themed forum website where you had a little avatar you could dress up.You gained gold by posting, playing mini games, posting in polls, or even just browsing in general. There were hundreds of subforums and in each of them a tonne of active threads. Another feature was the guild system. Basically anyone could create a guild which was pretty much your own themed subforum that the guild admin could decide the rules and who was able to join as long as they still followed Gaia’s ToS.

The anime I was into was (Bakuten Shoot) Beyblade, which at the time was an ongoing series. For those unfamiliar with the series a bunch of teenagers use battling tops possessed with the spirits of ancient mythological creatures and even gods to fight each other. Let’s just say it wasn’t winning any awards for amazing writing but it was a lot of fun and I LOVED my small corner of the fandom. It was pretty much your average shonen series of the time which meant that it had a main cast of 5 male characters (with a female lead added in the second season) and then very few minor female characters. The only actual canon ship was only made canon in a post canon addition to the manga that was not even released outside of Japan. So I bet you all are coming to the same conclusion that yes, there was incredibly bad shipping drama. The breakdown of shipping pretty much looked like this

10% slash

70% canon male/OC

20% canon male/canon female

Now to resume our story. I joined Gaia and headed over to the anime forum and found the main Beyblade thread. I posted an introduction and in it made mention that I was a fanfic writer and I liked slash. This was when I met C. I’m not going to drag her name as all of this went down over a decade ago and I hope that she’s grown as a person since then. If any of you are REALLY resourceful I mean the threads still exist. You can go find them and see just how awful it got.

C was a year older than me and apparently the authority in these parts on all things Beyblade. She was also a writer but in her own words did not write fanfics, she wrote and posted novels. She was pretty well known in the canon/OC circles and had a pretty enthusiastic following.

So when I came in to that thread and introduced myself I opened a can of worms. I was told that we did not discuss slash ships in this thread because it was not canon and it made some people uncomfortable. And ok, I can see that. It was cool. I was there to have fun and chat with people. I mean anyone that wanted to chat slash I could add on YIM, MSN, or LJ. However, 2 things started driving the knife into the wound.

It was not ok to talk slash but it was perfectly ok for C to discuss in depth her fanfics because it was an OC and obviously did not contradict canon as the stories were post (a currently unfinished) canon

People kept recognising me because my fanfic was exploding in popularity. So people kept bringing up slash and I’d get dragged into it as my fic was usually a catalyst for discussion.

To keep things from escalating us slash fans decided to make our own thread to talk Beyblade slash. Now, there was some divide in the slash fandom and people pretty much shipped only Kai/Takao or Kai/Rei but for the sake of everyone’s sanity we put our shipping differences aside in the thread and aimed to make it a positive space for everyone. I mean, most of us were multishippers so we tended to just be excited to read anything that wasn’t one of the 9000 OC fics we had to wade through to find any slash.

Whenever people would come into the main Beyblade thread now if they happened to mention slash they would get an extremely cold message from C if one of us didn’t manage to intervene first and direct the new member to our other thread.

The other crux of the problem was Kai. Kai was probably the most popular character in the English fandom and Kai was C’s favourite character. She had an extremely specific idea of how people should interpret Kai. If anyone came into the thread and made a post like “I LOVE KAI <3 <3 <3” she would be rather unkind to them making back handed comments about how the person only liked him because he was attractive or a “bad boy” or that if they didn’t have anything to add to the thread they should leave because we didn’t like spamming in the thread. If we ever started character analysis on Kai then C had to have the last word. After all she shared some characteristics with Kai and obviously that meant that she therefore knew him the best.

You all can probably imagine how well conversations went in this thread. I did my best to kindly welcome people to the thread, redirect them when they needed to be, and tried to calm down discussions when they got too heated. And if things got too bad in the main thread we’d just move to the slash thread and be super excellent to each other. There were days where C became so unbearable that her friends that didn’t even ship slash would come into the slash thread to hang with us because we were just really nice.

She was also extremely pushy with her fics. Whenever fanfics would come up shed be the first to suggest to anyone that they should read her novels. She even tried it repeatedly on the slash fans. Being completely fed up I one day made her an offer that if she read one of my fics I’d read all of hers. I didn’t even specify which fic. So she could’ve chosen one of my under 5k fics and I would have agreed to read like 200k worth of her fics. She never agreed to this in all the years of me dealing with her.

The worst part of it all was we couldn’t even really report her for harassment or anything because she was friends with a lot of moderators. The last thing any of us wanted was to get banned over some petty grievance since we’d lose all our hard work to making our avatars look fabulous.

If the whole mess in the forums wasn’t bad enough there was 1 Beyblade guild and guess who the guild admin was. The atmosphere in said guild could best be described as… tense. Anyone that wasn’t one of C’s rabid followers ran under the constant fear that they’d be booted for saying something that didn’t agree with her narrow view of things. My best friend and I were honestly surprised that she even allowed us into the guild. But she probably couldn’t afford to outright deny us as I was a pretty prominent writer in the english slash community then and my friend was also a prominent writer and artist.

Eventually we got tired of walking on eggshells constantly so some of the other slash fans and myself pooled our resources together and I created a second Beyblade guild. Our message was simple, we were just there to be a safe haven for ALL fans of the series. We were expecting pretty much the people from the slash thread and then maybe a handful of other people to join.

The entire fandom on Gaia over the course of a couple days abandoned C’s guild and joined ours. Whereas before we created ours hers was on a steady traffic decline our guild was BOOMING with posts.

Unfortunately the oldest mail I have is from 2007 on Gaia so I don’t have any screenshots of this but C was understandably upset that we’d sniped her entire user base. We did try to smooth it over with her saying that that was never our intention but it ended with her sending me a message that literally said “ok, you win” and this is something I still think about over a decade later. It forever shifted how I perceive antis.

My whole time in fandom I’d just been here trying to have a good time. I didn’t intend to become fandom famous. I didn’t intend to be in charge of one of the most active Beyblade forums at the time. I wasn’t trying to change C’s mind or fight her. And this whole time she’d thought I’d been fighting against her because we had different views on the series.

The last episode of Beyblade G Revolution aired in September 2005, her guild officially closed in 2006 and the fandom eventually started drifting into other things. I stayed active in it until probably 2008 when personal stuff drew me out of fandom and then officially took a leave from fandom in 2009 when my best friend passed away. I don’t know what happened to C but I know she was still writing her novels at that point. Whenever I see fandom drama brewing I always think back to her and how frustrated she used to make me and then I think of the “ok, you win” and I’m just left feeling sad for her and people like her. I just don’t understand how people can let their hearts be so consumed by hatred and self righteousness that it poisons their entire fandom experience. I guess that’s a conversation for another time.

One final comment that I would like to make here since I didn’t know where to fit it in above is that my one friend was completely DONE with C one day and we were talking to each other and she was like “she acts like her fics save lives in Africa!” and honestly this is the most perfect description of C’s attitude. Like good for her for believing in her writing but there is sometimes a point where you need to chill out with self promotion.

#fandom drama #long post #man i kind of wish i had screenshots of stuff that went down #because it was absolutely wild #and this is why i don't get involved in fandom drama any more #like this shit made me eternally tired #also y'all are welcome to rebagel this and tell your own tales #malicious musings

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guardiandae · 5 years ago

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Meta/Commentary Part 1: A Little ‘XO’ Wouldn’t Go Amiss

(Spoilers below)

Wade finally learned his roomie's real name on day two, when the proposed nickname of 'Priscilla' was rejected via stabbing.

"Y'know- I usually know a guy's name before I let him penetrate me," Wade joked, gritting through the pain.

"My name is Nathan Summers. You can call me Nate. Or you can shut your whore mouth."

I’m gonna say this right now so when I finally finish the sequel of this fic, nobody can cry foul or anything or pretend that I didn’t plan everything all along from the very start of this journey: There’s a reason why Nate stabbed Wade and it’s not just to be an edgelord. This fic starts written in Wade’s POV and then switches to Nate’s, and there is so much more info revealed from Nate’s perspective that changes how interactions are colored. In the sequel, it’s not written in that style but eventually you will understand Nate’s POV and be able to look back on this (and other moments) and be like, Ah. I spent a few months just agonizing over this fic planning. The levels of depth going on here, you don’t know.

Also it’s hilarious because, the movie never really establishes Cable’s real name so hi, it’s Nathan Summers. Scott Summers’ (Cyclops)’s son, but like... older than him because future and time traveling hijinks or whatever. This is only important because like, daddy issues.

technically they were even sleeping together, even if Nate slept in the only bedroom because he'd called dibs and Wade slept on the couch in a pile of fast food wrappers.

Denial.

Living with Nate was weird after living with Vanessa for so long. No more kisses -- not like he wanted any.

Denial!

Usually when Wade got home, Nate was never there. Hours later when Nate did come back, he'd just go to bed. Other times, Wade was hired for jobs that took days of travel to complete. There was little interaction between them and they barely saw each other, so Wade took to leaving little notes behind.

[Went to get milk. And also to put a cap in someone's ass. He's a bad guy though, so don't worry. I'll be home late. xoxo] [Forgot the milk. Also didn't cap the guy so I didn't get paid. Can you pick some up while you're out? xoxo]

So much info in one little spot. Nate only sees them as roommates, as a living arrangement and tenuous partnership to serve as an end to both of their needs. Nate has a place to live, and his only responsibility, as we learn in his POV, is to pay the rent on Wade’s behalf, with Wade’s money, because Wade is a disaster and his memory is getting worse. Not only is Wade just an annoying person who can’t take anything seriously, in his incorrect opinion, but there’s that level of guilt for feeling like a freeloader when Nate is the kind of person who’s had to fight just to survive his entire life. Wade’s little notes are so sweet, but to Nate, 1. weird 2. is this a joke? 3. stop reminding me of how much you care and meanwhile i can barely bring myself to write a note back, aaaaaa

I need to remember to revive the note-leaving between them in the sequel. It’s too cute, I can’t stand it.

Mercenary jobs had become harder to come by, and then work dried up. It was almost like nobody wanted to pay a guy to kill people anymore. As if there could ever be a shortage of people in the world who needed to die. But when one door closes, another opens -- everywhere he went, he suddenly saw slews of missing persons flyers. Wade had never noticed how many there were before, but he took it as a sign. He'd always wanted to try his hand at being a P.I. and Wade hadn't realized that the market was booming with families desperate to find loved ones. He offered his services as a private dick to several different people, but every single case was unsolvable. It was like they'd just vanished into thin air, but he knew that wasn't possible. It was frustrating to realize he was such a lousy dick.

Spoilers, but this is when the Thanos snap happens, and Wade is completely oblivious. Could someone who can be so devastatingly observant really be so obtuse? Or is his mind just protecting itself from such an incomprehensible reality that everyone else is suddenly saddled with? These are things Nate wonders later as well. Even I don’t know for sure. (I haven’t watched End Game and there’s still more plotline to tackle during the Snap, don’t @ me about how Marvel did it, I don’t know and I don’t care, I have my own plans) (By the way, characters will either be snapped or inexplicably alive, and that’s not a plot hole, that’s the joke. Welcome to Marvel, the writers never fucking make sense and I don’t have to either, YEET)

[Someone tried to sell a metal arm on the black market????!! It better be Bucky's and not yours. Not like I care.] [It was Bucky's.]

Rip Buckkyyyyyy lmaooo

But also, cryyyy because Nate is busy trying to help deal with absolute fucking chaos and he didn’t really stop to consider whether Wade would be wondering what happened to him. Ow. Yeah, I think Wade definitely subconsciously registered what happened and is in total denial of reality. It’s better that way. Nobody fucking tell him.

There was nothing that he hated more than being ignored. Might as well just talk to himself. Which he did a lot of lately.

Foreshadowing.

All of the warmth left his body at once, leaving him a little breathless and dizzy. He was vaguely aware of Nate looking at him, but it was less of a 'you're home' and more of a ' why are you here?'

This whole area of the fic hurts so good because I’m gay and I love drama.

Wade coming home, literally bleeding to death on the inside and in shock because, once again, everything went to shit for him, story of his life. And he sees Nate just there, dressed down, relaxed, and has this little flash of domestic happiness because he so desperately wishes that the domestic happiness was real and that Nate actually was waiting for him and happy to see him come home, and the hard snap back to reality where Nate doesn’t even like him is soooo fucking painful lol end me. And on top of that, he misread Nate’s concern as hate/disgust for him bc that’s what he’s used to, and then he passes out on the floor and wakes up with Nate over him because I’m gay and I love drama!!!!

"Wade, you died for a second," Nate told him. Wade couldn't quite tell if Nate was concerned for him or just annoyed. "I had to pull a piece of metal pipe from your chest. Can you tell me what happened?"

"I got a… pipe in my chest," Wade said, pausing for breath. His lungs felt wet and heavy. He should've left the pipe in.

"Very illuminating," Nate deadpanned, letting go. "Anything else I should know?"

This moment where Nate is so very fucking concerned for Wade, but then Wade cracks a weak joke, because that’s how he copes, and Nate is like, wow, fuck it, so much for being worried about you.

[[SCREAMS IN GAY.]]

These thoughts didn't feel like his own, even though they had his voice. His mind was always scattered, full of thoughts that flowed nonstop like a babbling brook. Sometimes it took a lot of conscious effort to reign himself in and make sense of his own head. But these just popped out of nowhere, in bold print, in boxes that were separate from everything else.

"Am I going nuts?" he wondered aloud, whispering to himself, because honestly, he was a little afraid of his own head right now.

(A little late to be asking that.)

And this is when the ‘boxes’ manifest for Wade. But in this fic, the voices that manifest in his head are his own intrusive, negative thoughts. The depression, the loneliness, the self-hatred, the belief and fear that Nate hates him too.

I’m gonna recap vs a full copy and paste because the next bit is long:

-Wade is coughing up blood clots from his lungs in the morning, or trying to. -Nate is disgusted but also sympathetic and offers to help Wade out. -A really layered conversation occurs.

“Maybe if I drown myself in the bathtub, the blood clots will rinse out. What d'you think?"

Wade’s exhausted. Joking, but also dead serious. Nate is concerned about Wade making such a dark joke, but he also can tell that Wade really is struggling.

“I’ll help you.”

“Really?” Wade is relieved Nate wants to help him, at first, but then remembers he just said he wanted to drown himself in a bathtub, and becomes disheartened again because he remembers Nate doesn’t like him. “Oh. Yeah.”

From Wade’s point of view: Nate just offered to help Wade kill himself, because of course someone would get a kick out of drowning him, he’s annoying, yadda yadda.

From Nate’s point of view: Wade isn’t okay and he offered to help him with his problem, because he sounds desperate and Nate doesn’t think that jokes will help Wade with his mental state, nor will the drowning actually do anything to solve the problem (the blood clots festering in his lungs).

"I bet you'd love to hold me down and watch me struggle," he said, still thinking about the drowning idea. Then, in a flirtatious tone, "I'll make it good for you, baby. Just promise me we'll do it face to face."

From Wade’s POV: He’s making a joke about Nate drowning him, but also making a sex joke to make it funny, to mock Nate if he really does want to drown Wade, so maybe he wouldn’t do it, or maybe it’d be weird and interesting.

From Nate’s POV: Wade is flirting with him, and his humor and still really dark and Nate really shouldn’t laugh at it or encourage that kind of thing.

From Wade’s POV, seeing Nate trying not smile: ah holy fuck he really wants to drown me.

"I don't want to watch you struggle," Nate said. If he did, he'd just leave Wade alone to keep coughing up blood.

"Ah. Consensual," Wade nodded. "Okay, well, I'd be open to some over-the-clothes stuff, and whatever happens while I'm still dead doesn't count."

Nate couldn't help but laugh. "I don't think we're having the same conversation."

Wade is continuing the joke, because from his POV he’s like, whelp, this might as well be what happens.

But they really aren’t having the same conversation. There’s more like, four different conversations happening at once. Wade’s very sincere idea of drowning himself as a solution to his problems, and Wade joking about Nate drowning him as a sexual innuendo. Nate interpreting Wade’s dark humor as a shitty attempt at flirting that he neither wants to encourage nor outright shoot down, and Nate offering to give Wade a better solution to fix his actual problem.

And Nate’s solution is to use his telekinesis to just... remove all the shit from Wade’s lungs. But he didn’t communicate that idea with Wade before just doing it, even if he did ask permission, so that’s pretty shitty and hence why we had to add the ‘Nonconsensual Telekinetic Heimlich Maneuver’ tag. smh

"That was dubious at best and now we have to add a warning in the tags," Wade sighed. "Non-consensual telekinetic Heimlich maneuver…. This is problematic now. People aren't gonna click on this."

This is a good spot to stop for now and continue in another post.

#self meta #reread #a little xo wouldn't go amiss

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misterghostface · 6 years ago

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.Tapes

When Stan starts his second year of college, he instantly hates his new roommate. But will Richie be able to win him over with his cassette tape obsession? Secret Santa for @sadlysaraofthelosers ! Sorry its late honey, merry christmas! @itfandomprompts

Also a massive thank you to @midnightmillie for helping me to edit!

Read on AO3 here! /// Fanfic playlist here!

When Stan had collected his key from the front desk, he’d been prepared for having an unbearable roommate. He didn’t expect them to be friends, necessarily, but in the worst-case scenario he thought that maybe they’d be able to ignore each other. At least long enough to get through the year in one piece. But later, standing in the doorway of what should have been his dorm room, Stan realised how naïve he’d been.

He dropped his bags into the only patch of clear floor space he could see and sighed, wading through the piles of debris to what he thought could be his bed. If there was one thing he couldn’t stand, it was mess. Stan could already imagine how terrible the next year would be if he stayed here. In fact, he didn’t know why he hadn’t applied for a transfer already – surely, he should phone the accommodation liaison while his mysterious roommate was out somewhere else.

He looked across to the messiest side of the room. He wouldn’t be able to transfer without a good reason, he knew from experience, but maybe there was something here that he could use as evidence that they didn’t get along – maybe an anti-gay poster, or a political t-shirt – just something that would prove a ‘clash in values.’

Stan snorted. As though a lack of basic cleanliness wasn’t a big enough thing to clash over.

After making his way to his roommate’s desk, he bent down, to have a look, hand on his knees. When there was nothing incriminating on the top – just a collection of candy wrappers and packets – he pulled out one of the boxes that had been stashed away underneath and opened the lid.

Inside were rows of cassette tapes, some of them of bands Stan didn’t even know you could get on cassette; The Cure, Led Zeppelin, The Ramones, even one called Wolf Alice, a group that Stan was pretty sure had started making music long after tapes had become obsolete. In the next box he found more of the same.

One thing was for sure, his roommate was not only messy but also a complete weirdo. Who would take the effort to transfer music from a CD onto a cassette tape, if they’re not weird?

Suddenly, he felt guilty. His mind was taken back to his school days, when he used to be called a freak for wearing a kippah or for getting stressed out when there was an uneven number of pens in his pocket. Maybe he was being a bit too harsh. It was unlikely, but maybe Stan just had the wrong end of the stick. He hadn’t even seen the guy yet, after all, and what if he was actually alright to talk to?

Stan sighed, swiping his arm across his mattress to brush piles of his roommate’s underwear, comics and pencils to the floor, and began the process of moving in. He’d give it a week. Just a week, he told himself, and if it was absolutely insufferable, he would see about changing rooms.

But it was going to be a long week.

***

“Who the fuck does work on the first day of college?”

Stan rolled his eyes and didn’t reply, focusing on the blinking cursor on his laptop screen. He was quite glad that he already had an assignment, actually, because it gave him a brilliant excuse to ignore his boisterous roommate.

Their first meeting had been awkward at best, his roommate – who had later introduced himself as Richie – barging in to find Stan meticulously dusting his side of the room. He had beamed and ran over, sticking a hand out to be shaken and babbling at decibel levels that could only be described as inhuman. Stan had just ignored him until he went away.

Obviously, Richie was unperturbed, as he was still trying to start a conversation, looking over Stan’s shoulder and asking endless questions (“What does ‘demographic’ mean?”) about his work for Introduction to Business.

He tuned him out, instead focussing on the music coming from the cassette player – ‘Simple Season’ by Hippo Campus – which was actually just calm enough to help him relax.

Richie leaned once more over his shoulder, pointing at the screen. “Wait... there. You’ve written ‘scold’ instead of ‘sold’. Spellcheck won’t pick up on that since it’s a real word.”

“Oh yeah, thanks.” Stan cursed internally as he looked up to where his roommate was pointing. “Don’t you have any work to do?”

Richie smiled infuriatingly and reclined back onto his own bed. “Nope!” He popped the ‘p’. “I don’t have to do anything but relax my fingers, babe.”

“Your fingers?” Stan turned away from his laptop, fighting the blush that threatened to come upon hearing the pet name.

“Oh yeah, I play guitar, didn’t you know?”

Stan shook his head.

“Damn! Well, if you’re a good boy I’ll play for you sometime, I guess.”

“I’ll pass,” he sighed, but Richie ignored him in favour of whistling to the music. After a minute, Stan realised he’d been tapping his own fingers to the beat.

***

Richie was already gone when Stan had woken up on Tuesday, and for some reason he couldn’t help but feel disappointed. That was stupid, of course – seeing Richie was the last thing he wanted. Or at least that’s what he told himself. He got dressed and left with minimal fuss, which last year he would have loved, but now felt was profoundly wrong.

He was sitting in the back row of a lecture theatre, eyes drooping with fatigue and the collar of his shirt digging into his neck, wanting nothing more than to go back to his room and sleep. He had spent most of the night awake, stressing about the paper he had to finish, and about how little he actually wanted to write it. He was confident that he could get a good grade – but God it was so boring.

He slouched down in his seat, far enough that Mr. Sampson couldn’t see him, and laid his head back on the wooden chair back. He closed his eyes and blocked the lecturer’s voice out. He just hoped he didn’t start snoring.

Shoulders loosening, he started to relax as the voices around him became a low monotonous buzz. Perfect bliss. He sighed happily, feeling himself begin to drift off.

The door banged open, shocking him awake and back into an upright position. “Oh sorry!” yelled a very familiar voice over the blasting of a handheld speaker. “Wrong room!”

Everyone turned to stare at Richie, who had begun to leave the room again, exiting to the very apt tune of ‘Talk too Much’ by COIN. Mr Sampson sighed.

“Alright, class dismissed. Go home and get on with your essays while I go and track down Mr. Tozier.”

Stan closed his eyes again in victory, then reached down and hurriedly stuffed his books back into his bag. For once, thank fuck for Richie!

With a newfound spurt of energy, he pulled himself to his feet and forced himself through the crowd that was congregating on the stairs. He pushed the door open with both of his hands – free at last! – and forced himself out into the bright sunlight, taking in a gulp of fresh air and taking off in the direction of the dormitories.

When he hurried past the place where Mr. Sampson was laying into an innocent-faced Richie, he could’ve sworn he saw his roommate wink.

***

With Wednesday came heavy snowfall, and with snowfall came news of lesson cancellations after lesson cancellations. Stan laid on his bed, chin resting on his hand and legs in the air, crossed at the ankle. Richie was sitting cross legged on top of his own duvet. They both stared out the window.

“Do you ever feel sorry for the animals, when it’s like this?” Richie asked.

“I don’t really like to think about it.”

“Well nobody likes to, but I can’t seem to help it sometimes.”

Stan tore his eyes away from the snowy scene in front of him and turned his head to look at Richie. Their eyes met. “Yeah, I get that. I wonder where all of the campus rabbits go when it’s this cold. And how the birds cope with their nests being frozen over.”

“I suppose they’re probably fine,” he replied, shrugging and scratching his face absentmindedly. “I mean, they’ve lived through winters before, right?”

“Yeah, you’re right. What’s got you so concerned about animals all of a sudden?”

“Why, am I not allowed?”

Stan frowned, then shrugged. “Sure, you are, I just didn’t recon you would.”

“We’ve only known each other a few days,” Richie pouted, “I think it's fair to say you don’t know everything about me. I love animals, dude.”

Stan smiled, thinking back to the previous winter spent on his ex-boyfriend Mike’s family farm. “I love them too. Have you ever had to brush snow out of a sheep’s wool? It’s so weird, because on the top it's so cold and wet, but at the same time it’s warm and soft underneath.”

“That sounds nice.”

“Yeah! Not that they’re probably supposed to play outside in it anyway, but it seems impossible to keep them all inside for the whole winter.”

“I can imagine. I used to have a friend that lived on a sheep farm. Haven’t talked to him in a while, actually – maybe I should ask him if I can go and feel some moist wool.” Richie stuck out his tongue. “I wonder what he’d say to that.”

Stan laughed. “Probably nothing good if you phrased it like that. Perhaps I should give Mike a ring, see if we can go visit?”

“Wait,” Richie said, now giving Stan his full attention, “do you mean Mike Hanlon? THE Mike Hanlon? Who I used to go to school with?”

“Well if you went to Derry North, yeah, I suppose you must’ve done." His brow furrowed slightly. “That’s so weird, what a coincidence! I didn’t ever expect to find someone from Derry all the way out here.”

“Why didn’t I see you around school too, then?”

Stan shook his head. “I didn’t go there, I met Mike when we were little, at Boy Scouts.”

“Wait, I remember now – didn’t you two date for a while? He talked about you quite a bit.”

“Yeah, and what about it?” Stan bristled. “You have a problem with that?”

Richie’s eyes widened in surprise. “No, of course not! I was just saying.”

“Oh. Well, good. My past roommates usually tried to switch rooms when they found out I was gay, as if I was going to start spying on them in the shower or something. Which I don’t, by the way.” Stan began to relax again, and laid back down to look at the snow out of the window.

“Shame that. I’ve got a cracking bod. You’d be falling over yourself to ask me out.”

“Richie!”

***

Stan’s breath misted in front of him, yellowed slightly by the artificial light coming through the window. One earbud rested in his ear. He was sat on the low wall just outside of the dormitories, red nose poking out over his tightly wound green scarf.

“What are you doing out here, stranger?”

He turned to see Richie standing in the doorway, hands jammed in his pockets and coat unzipped.

Stan smiled. “I could ask you the same thing.”

“Couldn’t sleep.” Coming to sit down next to him, Richie’s teeth began to chatter.

“Yeah, me neither,” Stan admitted, then tutted; “you’re going to catch your death out here like that.” He reached over and grabbed the zipper on Richie’s jacket, pulling it up to his chin and then pulling up his hood, trying to cover his ears despite his unruly hair getting in the way.

Richie laughed quietly and leaned forward until his forehead was resting on Stan’s shoulder. “You’re like my little husband.”

“Yeah right, I hated you at the start of the week,” Stan protested. Nevertheless, a hand snaked around under Richie’s hood to play with his hair. “You’re a menace.”

Richie nodded. “That I am. But I’m irresistible. Don’t feel too bad about it, everyone gets sucked in eventually. It’s just my miasma.”

“Your miasma?” Stan raised an unseen eyebrow.

“Oh, shut up, you know what I mean,” Richie replied with a smile that was lost in Stan’s shoulder. “Anyway, what are you listening to?” He reached around to grab the earbud that was dangling on Stan’s chest and put it into his ear, then sat up and laughed.

“What! It’s my favourite song!” Stan playfully slapped the back of Richie’s head.

Richie looked at him incredulously. “This? This is your favourite song? Are you being serious?”

“Hey, what’s wrong with Mr Brightside?”

“Nothing, nothing. It’s a good song! I just didn’t expect anyone to call it their favourite. It’s like Bohemian Rhapsody, everyone loves it when it comes on but no one calls it their favourite.”

“It’s my mom’s favourite.”

Richie sighed good-naturedly. “Of course, it is. Someone needs to introduce you people to some new music.”

Richie sat up further, and Stan’s hand fell from his hair. His hand immediately felt the loss, and it took a great deal of willpower not to reach up and pull Richie’s head down onto his chest. He stuffed it into his pocket instead, as though the weird feeling he was getting was lack of warmth and not something else.

Richie patted his pockets until he found the one that he was looking for, then pulled out a cassette player. “Listen to this one instead.”

Rolling his eyes, Stan paused his music and pulled out his earbud, replacing it with the one that Richie was offering him. “Oh wait, I think I know this one. It’s by Rex Orange County, right? Mike used to listen to this all the time.”

“I know,” he laughed, “who do you think got him into it to start with?”

“Well maybe you should get me into some new music, since you’re the expert.”

“You know what? Maybe I should. Perhaps I’ll make you a tape.”

Stan hummed. “Why do you like cassette tapes so much anyway? Why not just put all your music on an iPod, or use CDs?”

“My dad used to buy me tapes when I was a kid, and it just went from there I guess,” Richie shrugged. “You were probably expecting it to be a long story, but that’s all there is to it. I’ve just always associated them with happy times.”

Stan smiled and absentmindedly grabbed Richie’s hand. “Nah, I completely understand. It’s like how I’ve kept the cars I used to play with as a kid.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” Richie laced their fingers tighter and squeezed, looking off into the distance. “You don’t really hate me, do you?”

“What? Hate you? No, of course not.” Stan’s brow furrowed. “I was wary to start with but certainly not now. I quite like you actually.”

“Oh good. I quite like you too.” Richie leaned over to rest on Stan’s shoulder, but at the last moment turned his head to brush a feather-light kiss on the hinge of his jaw.

“Richie?”

He stood. “It’s getting late. Come on inside before you catch a cold.” He pulled Stan to his feet by the hand. “We should talk more in the morning.”

“You’re a funny one, Tozier.”

“Just how you like it.”

As Stan watched Richie’s retreating back, he couldn’t help but agree.

***

The accommodation office – a place in which Stan found himself far more often than any other student – was small, cramped, and deeply weaved with the smells of lavender and biscuits. He looked across the desk at Mrs Flint, a motherly woman with crinkled skin and a kind smile, as she pushed back a grey hair with one of her delicate fingers.

“How are you holding up this year, Stan? I was surprised to have not heard from you yet.” She brought up his file on the computer and tapped a few keys on the keyboard. “If you feel like you and your roommate don’t quite fit, there’s a few other people requesting room changes. I’m sure I can arrange something again.”

Stan smiled and wrapped his fingers around the new cassette tape in his pocket. Richie had given it to him that morning, along with a kiss on the lips and an invitation to dinner. “Not this time, ma’am. I think we’ve finally found a winner. There’s nobody else I’d rather spend my time with at the moment.”

“I’m glad to hear that, but are you sure? Last year you barely lasted a month before asking to be swapped around. What’s different this time?”

“There’s something special about this one. I just know it.” He looked behind Mrs Flint at his new boyfriend, who was pulling faces at him through the glass panel of the door. “He’s absolutely perfect, and I wouldn’t have him any other way.”

#it 2017 #stan uris #richie tozier #stozier #it secret santa #fic #mine #my writing

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sage-selfships · 6 years ago

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Sage H. D. - Bully Self-Insert

This is my Self-Insert for Bully/Canis Canem Edit! I made the art myself and would appreciate if you didn’t use it! The Template was created by Silkvale and found here! I will post updated versions to @kitty-selfshipping so uhm yeah, follow that blog to read it when it’s totally finished or edited.

If you are interested in reading the current info about my Bully Self-Insert, please read under the cut!

Biographical Information Full Name [& Pronunciation] - Sage Holland Drage ( S AI J ) ( H AW - l uh n d ) ( d r ai j ) Meaning - Herb or Prophet, Ridgeland, Dragon Set Age - 14-15 Certified Birthdate - 12 January 1992 (not my real birth year, but shh) Astrological Sign - Capricorn Pronouns - They/them or He/Him Aliases & Preferred Nicknames – Dumbbell - Sage might not actually like the nickname, but Mandy WIles insist on calling Sage it whenever Mandy sees Sage, so Sage is Dragon - As some people may not be able to pronounce Sage’s surname, Sage just call themselves Dragon to make it easier for everyone. Ms. Shy - Even though Sage prefers to go by he/him or they/them pronouns, people insist on calling them ms, and many people consider them shy because of how they seem terrified of new people Puppy - A nickname Sage got from Kirby Olsen, that they claim matches their general personality Ethnicities Distant Descendants : American, British, Dominant Descendants : Norwegian, Swedish, Danish Physical Description Hair Color - Brown Eye Color - Blue Weight – Height - Typical Clothing Wear : Maroon or pink vest, purple skirt, blue bow, purple bow, pink shoes - School uniform Red stained dress and blonde wig - Halloween costume, that is supposed to resemble Carrie White from the movie Carrie Faux fur coat, faux fur ushanka - Winter attire Figure/Build - Distinguishing Features/Scars/ or Birthmarks – A mole just over their lip Explain: Tattoos: Piercings: Frequently Worn Jewelry: Choker belt around their neck Personal Information Current Living Arrangements - Sage currently lives with three of their American relatives, but also they technically live at Bullworth, in the girl’s dorm Originated from - Vestfold, Norway Traveled Territories - Hobbies - Fears – Spiders, snakes, insects, heights, scarecrows, most of the jocks Religion/Beliefs – Atheist Why?: Sage grew up in an atheist family, as simple as that. Health Behaviors Physical Ailments/ Disabilities/ Issues – Addiction(s) [Sex, Drugs, Smoking, Alcohol, Other] Why?: Any regular medication taken? – Medication for their Iron Deficiency and for their Hives Chronological Information Profession - Student Likes - Dislikes - Goals/Ambitions – Most Instructive/Painful/Memorable Experience - Story behind experience: Weapons/Equipment - Sage mostly fights using their hands but can use a baseball if they need to Personal Attributes Personality - Strengths - Weaknesses - Good Habits - Bad Habits - Fetishes/Strange Behaviors - Stereotype - Shy kid with few friends As you know them better(and you like them) : As you know them better(and you hate them) : Ratings on Personal Qualities (don't go overboard make reasonable stats for your character) Physical Strength : 4/10 Sage might not regularly train, but surprisingly Sage is stronger than they seem Attractive : 5/10 Sage doesn’t consider themselves the most beautiful and mostly blames it upon their parents and grandparents for how they look Honesty : 7/10 Sage hates lying in general, but still does lie if they need to. Rule Abiding : 3/10 Sage thinks certain rules are to be broken and others are to be broken. Sociability : 3/10 Sage is quite shy when it comes to meeting new people, but if they muster up enough confidence they can make new friends. Bullworth Academy Information Reason for enrolling: Sage has lacked disiplince and Sage’s parents had relatives that lived close Bullworth, so they decided on sending them to a Clique - Standing and Rank in Social Circle - Room Number – 4 Roommate(s)- Zoe Taylor & Beatrice Trudeau Favourite Subject(s) – English, & Art Why?: Sage loves English because they’ve felt so motivated and Least Favorite Subject(s) – Why?: Favourite Teacher – Mr. Galloway & Mrs. Philips Why?: Mr. Galloway - Sage takes a liking to Mr. Galloway, mostly because he encouraged and gave Sage a warm welcome to the school, during Sage’s first day at Bullworth Mrs. Philips - Sage got a few compliments Least Favorite Teacher – Mr. Slawter Why?: Sage is quite afraid of Mr. Slawter, mostly because he yelled at Sage during their first class Knowledgeability Language(s) – Norwegian, English Schooling Level - Grade 8-9, Expertise – Chemistry - Math - English - Geography - Sage knows a few things, like where certain European countries are, but after that, nothing more Politics/Law - Economy - Cooking/Culinary - Shop - Botany/Biology - Mythology - high / Sage knows a lot about Norrøn Mythology and enjoys learning more and more about it Art - high / Sage highly enjoys Art and feels that they know a lot about the rules about realism and perspective Photography - Sage knows how to use a camera, and what settings look good or not, so they consider themselves at a 5/10 Reading Level - Overall Intelligence Level(s) - Interpersonal and Naturalistic. Relationships Statuses (once you list characters here, delete them from the other list near the end of this information sheet, makes things less confusing) (Also, please describe the relationships of your character with other characters) Trusted Companions Closest Friend(s) – Milliz - “I trust her with my life. Nothing more or less to say. And might I add that her and Earnest are really freakiNG ADOREABLE?” (Jeg beklager ikke for at du er satt på denne lista, Milliz) Friend(s) - Kirby Olsen - Despite Kirby being a jock and Sage being afraid of most of the jocks, Kirby and Sage are pretty close and

Hated Rivals Worst Enemies – Intolerable Students - Harmless Acquaintances Tolerated Students - Tolerated Townsfolk - Hot Encounters Hinted Attractions - Crush(es) - Lover(s) - Gary Smith, Jimmy Hopkins and Petey (Ey, don’t judge me please or make comments about this please, I just ship myself with all of them :( I will also make like another post or tweet where I just describe everything from lore to headcanons about this ) Ex(s) - None Extra Information Eating Habits Omnivore/Carnivore/Herbivore – Favorite Food(s): Favorite Drink(s): Disliked Food(s): Disliked Drink(s): Added Information Proclaimed Theme Song(s) - Either Dancing Queen by ABBA or Scent – Favourite Color: Favourite Season: Favourite Animal: Sage Favourite Music Genre: Sage can’t really choose, but they are very fond of country and Pop Most Memorable Quote – Various Quotes Through Interaction : “ Walking around – “I sure hope Mandy was joking when he called me a dumbbell...” “I don’t know jack dritt about math, how am I supposed to get a good grade?” “Gary mentioned something about rats, wondered what he was on about.” “I’m considering joining a clique... but which one?” “ “ “ “ When the fire alarm goes off – “Stuff like this always happens when you least expect it.” “Sure hope this isn’t a drill, I don’t want my slippers to get wet again without reason.” Greetings Good Terms: “Hiya!” “Hey there, best friend!” “How ya doing, sweetie?” “How are you doing, buddy?” “Hey, anyhting fun happen recently?” “Bro! What’s up?” “Heisann!” (Norwegian for ‘Hey there’) Bad Terms: “Please leave me alone” “I rather not talk.” “Ew.” “Get out of my face!” “Leave me alone!” “Continue being around me and I’ll beat you up! Or cry!” Saying goodbye – Good Terms: “Have a good day! “See you later!” “Hope you have a good night!” Bad Terms: “”See you in Hell, I uhm mean class.” “Leave already.” “I’m getting a headache, gotta go.” “Byyeee, see you never.” When Flirted With – Good Terms: “I uhm...” “Thank you....” “Well I uhm, thank you so much! I uhm haha, we should hang out or something!” “I feel flattered. I’ll uhh have to go over there until the blushing stops.” “Continue acting this sweet and you’re going to be getting ladies really quickly.” “ “You’re such a sweetheart!” “If I were of age, I would marry you right here on the spot, but I’m still too young.” Bad Terms: “I wouldn’t say I don’t like you, but I’m not that interested.” “Not to be rude, but no.” “That better not be trying to make me blush, because it didn’t work at all.” “ “

Watching a fight – “I know I shouldn’t watch this crap, but damn it feels so right, right now!” “ Attacking – “I’m sorry!” “I have no choice in this situation, so I apologize beforehand!” “I learnt this one from my friend!” While Fighting – “I really wish it didn’t have to end with one of us being hurt!” “Ouch! Thanks, I guess!”

Chasing someone – “You can run, but you can also hide!” “Come back here! please...!” Out of breath – “This always happens....” “Why do I have to have iron deficiency? When hidden from – “ Knocked out – “ Stinkbomb explodes – “I can’t see shit!” “I should be happy I can’t smell anything from before!” Opinions on students who reside at Bullworth Academy– (in alphabetical order) Bullies Davis White: Ethan Robinson: Russell Northrop: Tom Gurney: Trent Northwick: Troy Miller: Wade Martin: Zoe Taylor: Greasers Hal Esposito: Johnny Vincent: Lefty Mancini: Lola Lombardi: Lucky De Luca: Norton Williams: Peanut Romano: Ricky Pucino: Vance Medici: Jocks Bo Jackson: Casey Harris: Damon West: Dan Wilson: Juri Karamazov: Luis Luna: Mandy Wiles: Ted Thompson: Nerds Algernon Papadopoulos: Beatrice Trudeau: Bucky Pasteur: Cornelius Johnson: Donald Anderson: Earnest Jones: Fatty Johnson: Melvin O'Connor: Thad Carlson: Non-Cliques Angie Ng: Christy Martin: Constantinos Brakus: Eunice Pound: Gloria Jackson: Gordon Wakefield: Ivan Alexander: Karen Johnson: Lance Jackson: Melody Adams: Pedro De La Hoya: Ray Hughes: Sheldon Thompson: Trevor Moore: Preppies Bif Taylor: Bryce Montrose: Chad Morris: Derby Harrington: Gord Vendome: Justin Vandervelde: Parker Ogilvie: Pinky Gauthier: Tad Spencer: Opinion on Adults who teach and patrol at Bullworth Academy – (in alphabetical order) Miss Danvers: Miss Peters: Mr. Galloway: Mr. Luntz: Mr. Matthews: Mr. Wiggins: Mrs. Carvin: Mrs. MacRae: Mrs Peabody: Ms. Phillips: Neil: Prefects – Edward Seymour II: Karl Branting: Max MacTavish: Seth Kolbe: Opinions on People in the cities of Bullworth – (in alphabetical order) Townies Clint(aka Henry): Sage doesn’t like saying it, but they’re quite afraid of him and Duncan: Edgar Munsen: Gurney: Jerry: Leon: Omar Romero: Otto Tyler: Residents in the city of Bullworth – Bethany Jones: Denny: Dr. Bambillo: Krakauer: Mihailovich: Miss Abby: Mr. Brekindale: Mr. Buckingham: Mr. Castillo: Mr. Doolin: Mr. Huntingdon: Mr. Johnson: Mr. Martin: Mr. Ramirez: Mr. Salvatore: Mr. Smith: Mr. Sullivan: Ms. Rushinski Mrs. Lisburn: Osborne:

#Not finished but do I care? not really #I will try and finish this soon just not today #anyways I might have mnetioned another self-shipper in the post so look for that if you want #Self Insert #Sage Drage #Bully Self-Insert #Bully OC

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bastardnev · 6 years ago

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That Guy Next Door Ch. 16 (Final)

HHHHHHHHHHHooooookay i honestly can’t believe that we’re up to the Last Chapter Of This Fic. like i deadass cannot believe how quickly this all went

before i get into my usual Spiel i just wanted to say thanks real quick to everyone that’s read the fic up till this point. it means so much to me that ppl have been enjoyin it ❤️❤️❤️ (and i also wanna thank the ppl on mobile that are Not interested who’ve scrolled past each chapter on the off chance that the read more didn’t work dkjfgfjk)

WITH ALL THAT BEIN SAID:

tagging: @tylerblacks @joonhobi @rivela @aliciasfox @sailor-slam-dunk@kidvoodoo @smolsammichu @simulated-heat @douglas-leon-michael@1dluver13xx (lemme know if you wanna be added to my tag list!!)

Prev.: Ch. 1 ♡ Ch. 2 ♡ Ch. 3 ♡ Ch. 4 ♡ Ch. 5 ♡ Ch. 6 ♡ Ch. 7 ♡ Ch. 8 ♡ Ch. 9 ♡ Ch. 10 ♡ Ch. 11 ♡ Ch. 12 ♡ Ch. 13 ♡ Ch. 14 ♡ Ch. 15 ♡

Neville and Mustafa had been discussing their anniversary plans for a little while now, but that didn’t mean that the former was any less nervous when the big day finally arrived.

If anything, his knowledge of the conversation that they would be having was making him even more nervous. Far more than he probably should be, considering that this was supposed to be a fun day. Where he didn’t have to worry about anything.

Least of all inadvertently scaring Mustafa away, or freaking him out.

All that he needed to do was stick to his little plan, and everything should be fine. He’d been going over it in his mind for what felt like ages now. He knew what he was going to say, and he’d practiced it so many times that he’d lost count. It was fine. Everything was going to be fine.

He hoped.

The day was set to go according to the following itinerary: First, Neville would spend a good part of his morning making proper preparations. Everything needed to be just right, straight down to his outfit. (Wade had made a comment the other day about Neville most likely dressing as a dork on his anniversary. The spiteful side of Neville was determined to prove him wrong.) Then, later that evening, Mustafa would meet up with Neville at his house and have dinner with him and the rest of the family -- something that he admittedly was unsure about. Their initial plan had been to go out someplace to eat (Neville was far more fond of fancy restaurants when it wasn’t a tacky, love-centered national holiday), but it turned out that Jen and Daisy had different plans for the two of them.

After having planned it out for weeks -- apparently that was what they had been talking about during the nights when they’d stayed up way past their bedtimes -- they insisted that, seeing as it was such a big day, they wanted to do all the cooking. It was their anniversary, so why should they have to pay their hard-earned money to eat out someplace? (Neville wanted to say something about how he was the one that paid for the ingredients that they would be using to cook, but he kept that part to himself.)

And besides, Jen was on a mission to prove that she was almost an adult (“I’m almost eleven. Eleven! That’s two ones! Not one, two!”) and could handle such a lofty task. Neville knew damn well that when she got in one of these “grown-up” modes, it was difficult to get her out of it. It was better to just let her do as she pleased. Daisy, on the other hand, was primarily going along with it just so that Jen wouldn’t be the only one getting all the attention. All-in-all, it was business as usual with them.

Neville had at first been skeptical of their idea, as leaving a couple of children in charge of cooking an entire meal was risky for many reasons -- the main one being that he wasn’t in the mood to put out any fires that evening. That, and he was in a way looking forward to going out with Mustafa so they could have some time to themselves. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to spend time with his family -- he just believed that a couple should be able to have some private time on a night that was so important to them.

They managed to wear him down enough with their begging, however, and he figured that if he could convince Wade to lend them a hand then there was nothing to worry about. There would be some form of adult supervision -- much to Jen’s annoyance, but to Neville’s relief. And, he had to admit, he was curious to see what they would come up with. Their cooking skills were very limited, and as such so was the menu. Though he was predicting disaster, part of Neville wanted to see how this would all play out.

As such, one conversation with Mustafa later, it was officially decided that their anniversary would be spent at home with those closest to them. “Let’s hope we don’t end up getting food poisoning from this, though,” Neville added.

“If we do, then it’ll definitely be a night we don’t forget, right?” Mustafa replied with a little chuckle -- a nervous one, Neville had noted.

Of course, because nothing in Neville’s life could ever be simple, there was plenty of discourse over what exactly would be made. Neither he nor Mustafa really minded and had no real preference, but it had become a big argument starter with the children -- much like everything these days, now that he gave it some thought. Neville had received far more phone calls from home while he was at work than he’d have liked to, each one giving him a mini-heart attack and leading him to think that there was an emergency going on that required his attention.

But no, it was usually just Jen, insisting that Daisy was ‘abusing her power’ that she supposedly had by being the younger sibling, and she was trying to dictate what was cooked.

The truth was, she’d just said that she didn’t like green beans, and Jen took this as a personal attack.

From the moment that he’d woken up on the morning of the anniversary, Neville had had an odd feeling in his stomach. For the last couple of days he had been planning out exactly what he was going to say and when he would say it, so as to avoid being interrupted like he always seemed to be. Be it by adults, children, or birds, someone or something always took issue with him trying to have serious conversations.

Not this time.

Not when it’s this important.

Checking his phone after he’d rolled out of bed, Neville saw that Mustafa had already sent him a few texts, and he smiled at the sheer amount of heart emojis that were sent along as the final message.

Resident Bear Fanatic: Happy anniversary!!

Resident Bear Fanatic: I love youuuuu

Me: Someone’s excited :)

Me: Happy anniversary to you too, Moose. I love you + I’ll see you later xx

Taking a page out of Mustafa’s book, Neville also sent an entirely heart filled message, sending it off while a little voice in the back of his mind chastised him for it. He’d never been one to overuse emojis and preferred to use his words to communicate what he wanted to say, but Mustafa was a huge fan of the little things. Every conversation they had ended with some kind of emoji, even if it didn’t exactly fit what they were talking about. Mustafa was the only one who could get Neville to start over-sending them.

Man, Wade was right.

I really am head over heels for him.

Any hopes Neville had had for a quiet morning were dashed when he exited his bedroom and immediately heard the sounds of an argument brewing down in the kitchen. He didn’t think that the little chefs would be awake this early. Letting out a sigh, he made his way over the the stairs, Jen’s voice growing louder with every step he took. He could have easily just turned around and gone back into his room, but he knew he couldn’t leave Wade to deal with this fight all by himself. They’ll maul him. Again.

“She doesn’t like anything I wanna make!” He heard Jen yell, and he stopped to listen for a moment, sitting on the bottom-most step. “She’s only here to spite me!”

“Jen, be reasonable.” The next voice he heard was Wade’s. “Just because she doesn’t like something, that doesn’t mean she’s out to spite you.”

Wade clearly doesn’t know Daisy as well as he thinks he does. Neville mused to himself before going back to listening.

“But she conveniently hates everything that I suggest. I bet you could say the same thing as me, and she’d like it.”

“How do you know that?”

“When she wakes up, ask her if she wants to make a salad. Go ahead, I dare you.”

When she wakes up? Neville could have sworn she was already awake. Then again, if she had been awake, she’d probably be defending herself right about now. Neville had to wonder if Jen was up this early to make some sort of secret preparations so that her sister didn’t try to intervene for once.

“Alright, enough of the dares,” Neville finally spoke up, standing and entering the kitchen. “There’s no need to be fighting this much over dinner. There has to be something that you and Daisy can agree on.”

“I’m trying to find out what that is, but she’s being so difficult!” Jen insisted, crossing her arms and pouting. “She just says no to everything. She’s so immature. She’s almost an adult now.”

“Jen, she’s seven.” Her birthday had only passed a few weeks ago. She’d made almost as big of a deal about it as Jen did when she turned ten -- she’d even told Mustafa that she was ‘everyone’s lucky charm’. “I get that it can be frustrating, but you gotta remember that she’s still a kid. Be patient with her.”

“She needs to grow up already! I wasn’t like that when I was her age.”

Neville couldn’t help but give her a look that said, “Really?” at that little comment. Neville could recall many instances of her being intentionally difficult when she was Daisy’s age, but he kept that to himself, instead saying, “Try to work something out with her, please? Fighting solves nothing.”

“I’ll try…”

“Good.” He gave her a kiss on top of her head. “And I don’t want youse fighting when Mustafa comes over later.”

“Tell that to her.”

“I’ll tell her, and I’ll tell you again, too. We all need to be clear on that.” He pointed to Wade. “You, too.”

“What?” Wade was aghast. “What did I do to deserve a talking to? I’m just standin’ here.”

“Gee, I dunno, Mr. Interrogator. What did you do?”

As he finished saying this, Daisy came down the stairs and entered the room, looking groggy, still in her star-studded pajamas. “Mornin’, kiddo,” Neville greeted, ruffling her already messy hair. “You’re up early. Sleep well?”

“Mm…” She replied, leaning up against him.

“Got a big day ahead of you, don’t you? You all ready for tonight?”

“Hmm…” She nuzzled her face into his side, and he gave her a pat on the shoulder.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” Neville said this while keeping an eye on Wade, who now had a look on his face. Like he was just dying to ask something.

“So, kid…” He started. “I was just wondering -- did you and Jen decide on what you were gonna make tonight?” At her lazy shrug, he continued, “Have you considered… salad?”

Suddenly, her eyes lit up, and she looked more awake. “That’s a great idea!!”

Neville didn’t say anything to this. Instead, upon hearing Jen’s sharp inhale, he braced himself for round two of the morning fight. And he wonders why he needs to be spoken to about being on his best behavior…

Throughout the day, Neville couldn’t help but get a sense of deja vu.

As he went through the motions of the day, he got the feeling that he’d done all of this before -- not in the sense that this was his typical weekend routine and he was used to it, but that every single thing he did was something he’d done one other time before.

Specifically, the first time that Mustafa came over to dinner.

Just as he’d done the first time and as he’d promised to do that morning, he’d spoken to the everyone about how they should be conducting themselves that evening. Jen and Daisy were still fighting literally right up until they’d been sat down on the couch. And likewise, everyone had also given the same response that they had last time -- they swore they’d be on their best behavior, and they promised that there wouldn’t be any arguments (or, in Wade’s case, impromptu interrogations) while Mustafa was visiting. They all wanted this night to go smoothly, and they wanted to make sure Neville and Mustafa had the best night possible.

And of course, just like before, they hadn’t stayed true to their word.

Neville wasn’t sure what he was expected.

Mustafa had barely been in the house for a few moments before Wade led him over to the couch, making casual conversation about this and that before launching into his latest cross-examination. Previously, he had been asking him about if he were truly fit to be dating Neville, but since the two had been together for quite literally a year at this point he had to come up with new questions, each one increasing in terms of ridiculousness.

“Is ‘Mustafa’ really your name?”

“It’s you guys’ one year anniversary? Are you positive it’s only been a year? Because I’m suspicious of that.”

“How old am I?” (“Wade, that has nothing to do with him! Why are you even asking that?” Neville protested.)

All Neville was able to do while this ridiculous questioning was going on was stand back and watch, growing more and more humiliated with each passing moment. Mustafa didn’t seem to mind -- in fact, he was joking around with Wade, apparently enjoying it and even firing back with a few questions of his own -- but that didn’t make Neville feel any better. Why is it that whenever I tell Wade to do something, he does the exact opposite? Once again, Neville was reminded of Wade’s reaction upon being told to act appropriately. He truly was genuinely shocked.

Neville had actually gotten the feeling that the girls were trying to keep their promise to him, but that was proving to be too difficult. In the end, they’d decided on an entirely vegetarian dinner (secretly to Neville’s relief, as he would admittedly be a little afraid to eat any meat they may have cooked -- or undercooked, for that matter). This didn’t appear like it would cause any controversy, and for awhile it didn’t. There was good food, good conversation, and it looked like it would be a good night as well.

That is, until Jen decided to bring up how difficult Daisy had been throughout the whole process.

“It was fun, but… I ended up doing most of the work,” she’d said, shooting a glaring her sister’s way. “Since someone didn’t want to be a team player.”

“Jen…” Neville said as a warning, but he knew it was already too late. Nothing he said was going to work. At least he tried.

“I was a team player!” Daisy insisted, forking clanging on the table as she tossed it down, causing everyone to jump. “Daddy, wasn’t I a team player?”

“Please just stop fighting…” As futile as it was, he was still trying to diffuse the situation. On a day as important to him and Mustafa as this, were they really about to see an all-out war? He looked at Mustafa apologetically, as he was about to witness his first real fight between the siblings.

“It took Wade suggesting that we make something just to get you to agree!”

“Woah, don’t bring my name into this,” Wade said in his own defense. “I’m just an innocent bystander!”

“But I’m not wrong! I told you that she’s always trying to go against me, and I proved it! I don’t get why no one will believe me!”

“Because you are wrong!” Daisy yelled. “I’m good!”

“You are not! If you’re so good, then why didn’t you help? You mostly just sat back and made me do all the work.”

“Because you wanted me to. You never asked me for help because you wanted to show you’re a grown-up!”

“Ladies, we had this discussion earlier, can we please drop it?” Neville rose his voice and attempted to speak over their yelling, but that didn’t work, and the fight continued.

Suddenly, he felt a light tap on his shoulder, and he looked at Mustafa. “You want me to help you out?” He asked. “I can take care of this.”

“Can you?”

“You’re forgetting that I’m breaking up fights between little kids on an almost daily basis whenever I’m at work. Trust me, I got this.”

Neville frowned, but he shrugged, figuring that he may as well give him a shot. He was desperate to get this fight to end, he’d try anything. “Go ahead.”

“I’m so sick of you!” Jen yelled, her face now red with anger. “You’re so lazy, it’s unreal! You’re borderline useless--”

“Jennifer.”

The next voice to enter the phrase was Mustafa’s, and both Neville and Wade looked at each other, stunned that the first thing he’d chosen to say was her full first name. She hadn’t been in this much trouble in ages, and the fact that Mustafa of all people was the one that said it made everything even more startling.

Jen stammered, finally now realizing that she was in big trouble for causing such a scene. “But I-- She-- It’s her fault-- You!!”

“What about me?”

“You!! Stay out of this! Don’t butt in!”

Now Neville had to say something. “Jennifer, don’t talk to him like that. That’s disrespectful.”

“He--”

“Jen,” Mustafa started. “Drop the subject.”

“But--”

“Drop. The. Subject.”

Jen had clearly had enough, and she stood up, chair nearly falling over from the force. She stormed out of the room, angry footsteps dissipating as she went up to her room. Neville sighed when he heard the door slam. “Jesus…”

Daisy hadn’t said anything since Mustafa joined the conversation, and she looked torn on whether to be upset at what happened or gleeful that Jen had been told off. Eventually, she settled on the latter, but this didn’t sit well with Mustafa either -- though he was far calmer now. “Daisy, you should’ve ignored her,” he said.

“Why’m I getting yelled at? She started it…” She moped.

“You’re not getting yelled at. I know she started it. You’re not in any trouble. But from now on, just ignore her when she tries to pick a fight over something like that, okay?”

She was still unhappy that she was spoken to, but she nodded, slumping back in her chair and going back to eating. Mustafa let out a breath, and he looked to Neville, giving him a nod of his own. “It’s handled,” he said.

“I…” Neville was still in awe. “I didn’t think you’d actually step in there like that. I’m impressed.”

“Got it down to a science.” With that, Mustafa went back to eating as well -- but it was obvious that his enthusiasm wasn’t there anymore. Neville figured that it was safe to assume he’d had enough of this family for one evening.

Suddenly, he’d lost his appetite.

“I’m just… so fucking sorry.” Neville said when he and Mustafa escaped outside to the porch following dinner -- he hadn’t even meant to swear, but he was so frustrated with how the night turned out. “I tried to talk to them before you came over, and they said they’d behave, but… God, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, you had no way of knowing that was gonna happen,” Mustafa replied, sounding disappointed. Neville’s heart sank. Everything that he’d been planning to do that night, what he’d been planning on asking Mustafa when all was said and done -- could he even do that anymore? The mood was sour, and when they looked back on their first anniversary all they would remember was the fight that interrupted dinner.

Fuck. Me.

“I should’ve known,” Neville argued. “They’d been fighting for the last couple of days over what to make, and they were even fighting this morning. I should’ve known that they were gonna get into another argument. All they do is fight nowadays…”

“Well… If I were you, I still wouldn’t blame yourself. You did everything right. In the end, they’re two young girls who spend a lot of time together. Too much togetherness is bound to cause problems like this. It happens. It’s no biggie.”

“I still feel so bad. Why didn’t we agree to go out someplace instead… That’s what you wanted to do, right?”

“I… Well, yeah, I kinda did.” Mustafa shrugged. “I didn’t say anything before, but I was hoping that’s what we’d end up doing. I didn’t wanna hurt the girls’ feelings, though. But, there’s nothing we can do about it now. Can’t change the past.”

“God… Again, I’m sorry.” Neville sat down on the front step, propping his elbows on his knees and holding his face in his hands.

Mustafa sat down next to him. “Hey, chin up. Technically there isn’t any law that says we can’t still go out somewhere to celebrate. Not everyone goes out for anniversary dinner the day of -- sometimes they have to wait until they have time.”

“That’s true.” Neville recalled not only his parents, but also him and Marina doing the same thing in the past. “So you’re saying we should go out sometime soon?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.” He smooched Neville’s cheek. “We’ve earned it. Especially after tonight. Take two, next weekend. Just us.”

“I like the sound of that.”

A cool September evening breeze blew, and Neville scooted closer to Mustafa, the latter resting his head on Neville’s shoulder. Though the night had been hectic, at least they had this moment to themselves. So long as it stayed like this, then maybe Neville might have a chance…

“I mean, hey,” Mustafa started with a small chuckle, interrupting the silence, “sooner or later we can look back and laugh at all of this. And by the time our second anniversary rolls around, this’ll just be a distant memory, ya feel? Something we can all joke about.”

“Second?” Neville grinned. “You’re already thinking that far ahead?”

“Would you rather I said ‘tenth’ instead?” He winked. “Because I can easily see us having a tenth.”

“Damn, and here I was worried that you were pissed at me after what happened.”

“Never!” Mustafa waved his hand. “Your family is… something, but I love them. And I love you. It’s gonna take a hell of a lot more than a sibling rivalry to get me to leave you, Nev.”

Neville felt warm inside. “I’m glad. And I love you too.”

Mustafa took Neville’s hand, gently rubbing his thumb along the back of it. “Man, it really has been a whole year, huh? It honestly doesn’t feel like it..”

“Right? I still remember when Jen threw that ball over your fence.”

“And you came over to come get it. You got all tongue tied.”

“I was a mess. I wasn’t expecting this to answer the door.” He gestured in Mustafa’s direction, making him laugh. “I thought some angry old man had moved in.”

“I’m not angry, but I am old, so you’re not exactly far off there.”

“You are not old.” Neville shoved him. “We’re the same age -- if you’re old, what’s that make me?”

“You’re younger than me! You’re a spring chicken. I’m ancient.”

“I’m younger than you by, what, five months? That’s nothing. Neither of us are old.”

“...Man, you were so cute on that day, though. And when I found out that you were single, I instantly knew I had to ask you out.”

“Even though I never actually told you I was into guys before you asked.”

At that Mustafa, put a hand on Neville’s shoulder. “Nev. Trust me on this one. I knew.”

Neville snorted. “Alright. But then Wade interrupted you right as you were about to ask…” Neville grumbled. Wade’s poor timing would be the death of him -- he was surprised he hadn’t come out to join them yet. There was still time.

“That sucked, but I did get to ask you eventually. And you did say yes.”

“And thank the Lord I did.” Neville squeezed his hand. “I know I told you all this before, Moose, but you’re the first guy I’ve really… dated since my split. The date we went on was the first time I’d gone out with someone in years. You truly did help me to rediscover how amazing it feels to love someone.”

Mustafa smiled. “I’m so glad I could do that for you.”

“I really wasn’t sure if I’d ever love anyone again after getting divorced. Not many people want to date a single parent -- they don’t want to have to deal with the children. And I was so sure I’d already met The One, I didn’t think I’d ever feel so strongly for another person. You make me so happy.”

“Aww, Nev, you’re such a softie.”

“I really am, aren’t I?” He swallowed. “And you’ve made the girls so much happier, too. I know what happened tonight was bad, but I’ve seen the way they both interact with you. I remember being so concerned after the split that they’d start to resent me for it -- they were young, but not young enough to have no idea what had happened.”

“Do you still think that way?”

“Not really. Even if I didn’t think that they resented me, things had definitely changed. Especially after Marina moved and she couldn’t come to visit them anymore, or take them out on little day trips. But ever since I’ve gotten with you and you’ve started to hang out with them, they’ve changed. Fighting notwithstanding, they’re so much happier. I really can’t thank you enough for that, Mustafa. Thank you for making my girls so happy.”

“Geez, Nev, you’re turning me into a softie now…” Mustafa laughed. “You have too much power.”

This is it. Just do it.

“...Moose, I… I gotta ask you something.” Neville started, tone more serious. “And you don’t have to answer right now if you don’t want to, that’s totally fine, but I have to ask.”

Mustafa’s eyebrows rose, and it looked like there were a million different thoughts running through his mind. His boyfriend wanted to ask him a question on their anniversary? Right after they’d had a discussion like that? It was cute watching him try to figure out what Neville was going to ask. “W-What’s up, Nev?”

“Moose, would you…” He took a deep breath. “Would you… be interested in maybe moving in with us?”

The smile on Mustafa’s face grew even wider. “You want me to move in with you?”

“It doesn’t have to be tonight or anything. It can literally be whenever you want -- or, if you don’t want to at all, then that’s okay, too. Whatever you’re most comfortable with.”

Mustafa didn’t say anything for a moment. He was thinking again, licking his lower lip and letting out an awed chuckle. “Wow,” he finally said. “That’s… not what I expected to hear this evening.”

“Caught you off guard, didn’t I?”

“Would I be able to ask you a question of my own, Nev?”

“And now you’ve caught me off guard,” Neville joked. What was this about? “Go ahead.”

“Well… This is just from what I’ve heard, but… typically, when couples start talking about moving in with one another, that usually means that… y’know, marriage is on their minds.”

“...Oh?”

“Hence why I’m now wondering… Have you been thinking about it?”

Neville looked up at the sky, watching an airplane fly overhead. “I won’t lie, it’s definitely crossed my mind once or twice. Maybe three times. Or, four times. I think you catch my drift here.” He quirked his eyebrows up at him. “I guess you could say that I wanna marry you.”

“...And I guess you could say that I wanna marry you.”

Neville hadn’t done anything even remotely athletic in ages, but he truly did feel like he could start doing backflips after hearing Mustafa say that.

“But… maybe not any time soon, though?” Mustafa continued. “Weddings are super expensive. Not sure if I’m ready to put myself through all that planning just yet.”

“Neither am I,” Neville agreed.

“And besides, I want there to be a real engagement.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Moose. I’ll surprise you good.”

“...Who said that you’ll be doing the proposing?” He narrowed his gaze at Neville, who mirrored his expression.

“I see how it’s gonna be…” Neither one of them could keep this staredown up for any longer than a few more seconds before they both went back to grinning. “We can put that off for now. So… about that moving in thing that I mentioned before…”

Mustafa giggled. “I didn’t forget, don’t worry.” He took both of Neville’s hands. “The answer to that question is ‘yes’. Of course I’ll move in with you guys.”

Neville didn’t reply to that. Instead, he leaned in to kiss Mustafa, feeling more love for him in that moment than he ever had up until that point. After so much doubt, so much worrying, and so many nights of laying awake telling himself that no one would want to date him because ‘no one wants a single dad’ -- he could put all of that to rest.

Finally.

It was when they heard the sound of the front door cracking open that they pulled away, and they spotted Daisy peeking at them. Her eyes were wide, mouth agape, like she’d just witnessed something that she wasn’t meant to see. “You good, kiddo?” Neville asked as she opened the door a little wider.

“Ah… Ah?” She breathed out, looking between the two of them. “You?”

“Is… everything alright?” Mustafa asked.

“He…” She looked to Neville, pointing at Mustafa. “He said yes? You asked him, and he said yes?”

“Wha?” Neville was confused -- did she not hear the part where he said that he’d move in? What did she think Mustafa agreed to?

“He said yes…” After muttering this, she suddenly spun on her heel, bursting back into the house. “He said yes!! They’re getting married!! It’s happening!!”

“Oh my God…” Neville put his face in his hands, the next thing he heard being Mustafa’s laugh. “It’s like she conveniently ignored what the question I asked you was.”

“All she needed to hear was me saying yes.” Mustafa patted Neville on the arm. Neville looked up, seeing the happy expression on his face. When Mustafa was reacting like that, how could he possibly be embarrassed?

And he looked over towards the open door, staring off in the direction that Daisy had run in. Faintly, he could hear her trying to explain to Wade that this was for real this time -- not a false alarm, but the real deal! It was totally a proposal! They really were getting married!

Maybe we are, Daze.

Maybe we are.

#mustafa ali #neville #adrian neville #mustafa x neville #long post #SUUUUPER long post #wwe fanfiction #hhhhhhh #jess.txt

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readygamerone · 7 years ago

Text

Chapter 38 - Now I Am Become Death, Gunter of Worlds

Wade is at last faced with what appears to be the final puzzle required to get the coveted Easter Egg. However, he has no idea what to do. Alone in the virtual recreation of Halliday's office, he can't even voice chat with his friends on the outside. The link was seemingly severed by the OASIS automatically once Wade reached this stage of the challenge. Why it was possible to receive tips, tricks and movie lines to help him through the previous sections is a mystery.

Wade spends several minutes trying to turn on every TV, game console and computer in the room but none respond. Finally, he finds one that does power on: the same computer Matthew Broderick's character uses in WarGames. It is password-protected, however. Wade runs through several names, on the brave assumption that Halliday had used the same password convention as the character who designed the supercomputer in the film: naming it after "The person he’d loved most in the world." He tries inputting the names of Halliday himself (not a bad first guess, from what we know), Ogden Morrow and Morrow's deceased wife Kira, for whom Halliday harbored a one-sided obsession. Wade even tries typing in the names of a few of Halliday's childhood pets. None of it works.

It's not until Wade remembers that Halliday only felt comfortable talking to Kira while gaming that he tries inputting her D&D name: Leucosia. This turns out to be the correct password, as every other piece of electronics surrounding Wade immediately powers up after it's entered. I'm going to note here that "Leucosia" is also the name of one of the Sirens from Greek mythology. You know, the woman-bird hybrids who led men to their doom with their sweet voices and songs? The sexual pathology at work here couldn't possibly be more surface-level. Keep that connection in mind for a few paragraphs from now.

With the power on, all doubt as to the next step has been washed from Wade's mind. He scrambles over to the Atari 2600 and starts up the game Adventure. This isn't too much of a reach for people who know the history of the term Easter Egg in the world of video games, as the concept of a hidden feature was popularized by this particular title. By playing through the game in a particular way, the player can enter a room where the sole designer, Warren Robinett, had written his name on the floor. The funny thing is that this original "Egg" was included in Adventure as a way for Robinett to, in some way, get credit for his labor. At the time, Atari didn't allow its programmers to have their names on or in their games out of fear that competitors would lure away their staff. Coveniently, this also made it easier for the company to deny their employees any royalty payments they would've been owed. So it's extremely fitting that Wade finds, in the place of Robinett's name, only an Atari-rendered Easter Egg graphic. As is their way, a billionaire nullified the contribution of a worker yet again.

Immediately after finding the Easter Egg in the Atari game, Wade finds that his OASIS avatar is now holding the Egg as well. He places it in a jeweled chalice nearby and, unceremoniously, wins the Egg Hunt. It turns out that the villains weren't able to compete with Wade's extra life head start and had no further effect on the proceedings.

“You win,” I heard a voice say. I turned and saw that Anorak was standing right behind me. His obsidian black robes seemed to pull most of the sunlight out of the room. “Congratulations,” he said, stretching out his long-fingered hand.

I hesitated, wondering if this was another trick. Or perhaps one final test . . .

“The game is over,” Anorak said, as if he’d read my mind. “It’s time for you to receive your prize.”

Wade takes the hand of Halliday's automated avatar and suddenly, his avatar was dressed in black wizard's robes instead. Along with a seemingly neverending list of abilities and items, Wade gains Halliday's twelve digit fortune. Now a multibillionaire, Wade also has supreme control over everything and everyone in the OASIS. He was already the coolest and most beloved gunter around, now he's got the power to back it up.

Wade is also the only person that can enter the study within Castle Anorak, as it contains a button that can delete the entire OASIS and every bit of data on it forever. E-Halliday says things to Wade like "try to use your powers for good" and "I trust your judgment" but these are only automated lines he would've delivered to anyone who won his contest. Good character and judgment aren't requisite for being good at games and memorizing trivia. Half of the OASIS dying and losing everything they had in the battle a few chapters ago already had troubling economic implications. But the entire planet functions via the OASIS, meaning that pressing this button would crash not only the world's economies but its education systems, governments (remember that we were told that the US's electoral voting flows through this thing) and more.

Of course, Wade displays no interest in the button, which would take from him everything that he had just received. Halliday felt he had to justify its inclusion anyway, via what might be the most preposterous bit of dialogue in the entire book.

“Listen,” he said, adopting a confidential tone. “I need to tell you one last thing before I go. Something I didn’t figure out for myself until it was already too late.” He led me over to the window and motioned out at the landscape stretching out beyond it. “I created the OASIS because I never felt at home in the real world. I didn’t know how to connect with the people there. I was afraid, for all of my life. Right up until I knew it was ending. That was when I realized, as terrifying and painful as reality can be, it’s also the only place where you can find true happiness. Because reality is real. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” I said. “I think I do.”

“Good,” he said, giving me a wink. “Don’t make the same mistake I did. Don’t hide in here forever.”

Hey, you dumb asshole. Your stupid contest created an entire generation of people who do nothing but hide online forever, worshiping movies and video games made decades before they were born. Not to mention that everyone is too broke to want to live in the hellish dystopia that the real world has become. And they only became that way because you, as the richest person around, siphoned off all the profit your all-encompassing network built up with its endless microtransactions. But maybe he's right, everyone should log off and fight the wasteland marauders that wait outside all of the major cities instead.

This also comes across as disingenuous because Halliday only had two barely-functional relationships with other people before he died. One was with his childhood best friend, Ogden Morrow. The other was with Morrow's wife, to the extent that he was in love with her to the point of damaging his only other relationship. We never find out what Kira, a character who died before the start of Wade's story, felt about Halliday putting her up on this pedestal. No one seems interested in her perspective but I can't imagine she would be comfortable with all this, despite naming herself after a Greek man-killer. It's painfully obvious that Cline wanted to cap the story off with a moral about the beauty you can find in living offline but nothing about the rest of the narrative or world he's clumsily built backs it up. The "lesson" is completely flattened under the weight of so many contradictions.

Humbled by these empty platitudes, Wade takes a few minutes to collect himself and then calls up his buddies. They're pretty excited that they're friends with the most powerful person alive, especially after Wade uses his new authority to completely resurrect their deceased avatars. However, he only does this for Aech, Art3mis and Shoto (who delivers yet another "Arigato, Parzival-san" and deep bow in response). I guess the millions of other people whose digital bones are rotting outside the castle are out of luck. To further flex his new powers, Wade kills the remaining Sixer avatars, who were unable to reach the Egg before he did, with a wave of his hand. Art3mis hadn't logged back in to the OASIS to congratulate Wade though. Wade is told that she's waiting in the real world to meet him face to face for the first time. If anything can still outdo that Halliday lecture, it's going to be this unearned romance scene. But that'll have to wait for the last chapter.

Almost as an afterthought before he goes to meet up with his crush, Wade is told to pull up a breaking newsfeed. He sees that Nathan Sorrento, the dreaded leader of the Sixers, has been arrested by federal authorities for the multitude of crimes that the stolen IOI data implicated him in. It was very kind of the FBI to wait until right after the plot was resolved to step in, it would've really sapped the already small amount of dramatic tension if they hadn't. It's also lucky for them that Sorrento didn't win, as he would've brought about Armageddon if the feds had still tried to put the cuffs on. Although, depending on how the last chapter ends, it might've been for the best.

Pop Culture References 29 (3.2 per page)

Video Games Atari 2600 IIIII I Adventure IIIII IIIII Space Invaders I

Television Star Trek I

Movies WarGames IIIII I

Computers Apple I IMSAI 8080 I

Books The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy I

General Nerddom Dungeons and Dragons I

Brands Zenith I

#ready player one #RPO #ernest cline

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