#vulva/clit-centric sex

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Guide: Pleasure-Centric Sex Ed. Facts Every Woman Should Know

Some basic sex education: Decentralized from men and heteronormative perceptions of sexual pleasure.

Important for everyone AFAB with any sexual orientation: heterosexual, bisexual, lesbian, asexual, trans, non-binary, etc. Here are some ways to reclaim your sexuality from the patriarchy and heteronormative gaze.

Understand your anatomy, seriously. The clitoris is the female sex organ responsible for pleasure, not the vagina. While you may think of the bean as an isolated love button, it is actually anatomically analogous to an inverted penis and extends internally through the inside of your vaginal wall and the inner lips of your vulva. If you want to more aptly gauge your state of physical arousal, evaluate for hardness in addition to wetness (yes, it looks like a mini boner, lol).

All female (genital-induced) orgasms are clitoral orgasms. Whether they're external, internal, or both. Like its male anatomical equivalent, every clitoris has its own unique shape and size, which can be best stimulated in different ways externally and internally depending on your personal anatomy. Common pleasure zones include the external head "the clit," the "G-spot" (around 2-3 inches deep on the front of the vaginal wall), the "A-spot" (around 4-6 inches deep on the front of the vaginal wall), and anal region (stimulates clitoral legs for some AFABs).

Remember your brain is one of the most important sex organs. Sex is as (or more) mental as it is physical. According to Dr. Emily Nagoski, it is more common for AFABs to have a responsive desire style (aroused by their external environment/erotic cues that stimulate the 5 senses) versus a spontaneous desire style ("heat of the moment" sexual desire that requires minimal foreplay/build-up for pleasure and gratification).

The cervix height and density changes (and can affect how you experience sexual pleasure) throughout your cycle. If a certain position hurts sometimes and is pleasurable at others – whether alone or partnered, know this is normal. Your cervix tends to sit lower with a firmer texture from the end of your cycle and progressively raises/gets softer (thanks to rising estrogen levels) until it reaches its peak height & softness around ovulation. The cervix opens slightly during ovulation and right before/during menstruation (haven't seen a study researching the correlation between cervix opening and higher libido, but I would love to see one on this due to the correlation here for so many women). Learn what positions and techniques are most enjoyable for you during different times of the month (consider this practice as cycle syncing for your sex life).

[abra-ka-dammit]

this is kinda dumb but man it really breaks my focus on a yaoi when a sex scene comes up and it becomes clear the artist has never seen a real-life naked man before. (pardon this cis-centric talk; its yaoi, which never seems to acknowledge trans people outside of maybe a side character u never see get laid.)

Like they got all the general anatomy going on pretty well until you notice the pelvis seems to be going on a little too long and you end up at a dick sitting where a clit would be. You see balls that seem to be attached to the shaft rather than hanging from its base. You see a bend-over where the balls push out behind the legs somehow without the character then crying out in pain from pinching and pulling his nuts the entire width of his thighs. You see an uke's bizarrely vulva-like, bulging pink perineum under his glistening pink butthole which sits among skin thats the same light peach color as his face. not even gonna mention the lack of body hair bc thats just. a given in most yaoi. (which tbh is wild. not even in their pits? no pubes? yall are missing out on happy trails??? smfh)

[vibethatspot]

How Vibrators And Sex Dolls Are Popular Nowadays?

A vibrator assists with stirring, invigorate and upgrade sexual delights. There are different sorts of Vibrators and approaches to utilize them. Peruse on to find out about how to use vibrators. 

Why Use A Vibrator?

You can utilize Vibrators during masturbation and accomplice play to stimulate yourself and improve joy. Following are a few motivations to utilize a vibrator: 

• If you have restricted portability and think that its hard to animate your privates, you can utilize a vibrator.

• If your accomplice completes early, vibrators can be a hero.

• Using it on your clit and vulva can help ladies climax during penetrative sex.

How To Use A Vibrator?

Look at the different kinds of vibrators for ladies and how to utilize them to strengthen your delights:

G Spot Vibrators

G spot vibrators are inside vibrators planned with a bend to focus on the G-spot region. If utilizing it with an accomplice, lie in a G spot-accommodating sex position, similar to the legend, to get the most extreme joy. Utilize a water-based lube if necessary.

Egg Vibrators

Egg Vibrators are intended to be embedded inside and accompanied controller. Egg vibrators are unimaginable when utilized with an accomplice. You can set the vibrator to your ideal speed to amp up the experience. These can be used for butt-centric incitement too.

Adding the utilization of sex toys to your life has various advantages. Whether you are in a serious relationship or single, utilizing sex toys can add an incredible arrangement to your whole standpoint in manners you probably won't anticipate. Peruse on for only a couple of the benefits you can get insight!

Add to Your Relationship

Connections will indeed, in general, fall into a trench the more they last. However, this trench regularly reaches out to the room, too, making closeness nearly seen as a task. By adding suitable sex toys, Singapore couples can infuse new experiences, fun, and intimacy into their relationship.

Lift Sexual Performance

Utilizing an assortment of Sex Dolls online permits couples to investigate the various parts of their sexuality in a protected climate. These adornments can likewise be used to address torpidity in the room or issues that can manifest. For instance, you can include a few ensembles to add a dream climate to your experience or consolidate the utilization of oils to assist with streamlining things.

Going Solo

Regardless of whether you are solo by decision or your accomplice can't be with you right now, by utilizing sex toys, singles can, in any case, appreciate learning the pleasurable parts of sex, even without an accomplice. This offers the single individual a chance to become acquainted with themselves better. In contrast, the individual in a relationship can utilize sex toys as a bouncing-off highlight investigate all the more entirely with their accomplice.

Adds to Your Health

As well as adding to your actual wellbeing, utilizing Sex Dolls online permits individuals to assuage pressure. With every one of the requests on the average individual today, both anxiety and nervousness can develop. Sex toys can give you a protected, private and fast approach to let off a portion of your set pressure, so you are prepared to confront the difficulties of your life again.

With the expansion of Sex Dolls, online occupants can hope to be more joyful, better, and happier with their lives, generally speaking.

[coughscent1-blog]

The Ultimate Sex Position Guide

Everyone's got their go-to sex positions of choice. No matter if you're a missionary, cowgirl, doggystyle or CAT girl—you can always experiment with more! Consider this your go-to guide for covering all the basic sex positions. And don't worry, nothing makes it onto this list unless it's extra pleasurable for women. No performative twisting and acrobatics without reciprocation here. Also, keep in mind these positions can be more of a suggestion than a hard how-to-guide. If bending your leg a particular way tends to give you a Charley horse from hell, but the added friction brings you closer to an O than ever, feel free to adjust accordingly.

Positions to Get You Out of a Dry Spell

The Cheat Seat

Straddle your partner while they sit down on a straight-backed chair and get pumpin. You can put your feet on the floor for extra leverage and grab ahold of the chair back for support when your thighs get tired. The secret sauce that makes this position extra hot? Having your partner hold their lubed, cupped hand over your vulva so you get extra clit stimulation with every thrust.

The Thirst Tap

Whether you’re in a long-distance relationship or you just haven’t seen each other in a while, you can make it work to your advantage. Buy a new sex toy and tell them exactly how you’d like them to use it on you when you finally do meet up, but don’t tell them what exactly the new toy is. Send lots of sexy pics or sexts beforehand to IRL clickbait them and build the fantasy up, too.

The Mirror, Mirror

Lie on your sides facing each other and mirror each other’s movements. This position is even hotter the slower you go. You can start by teasingly tracing your partner’s lips with your finger and having them do the same. For an even more intimate vibe, you can both break out into mutual masturbation with eye contact to make things super hot.

Safer Sex Positions That Are Hot as Hell

The Double Finger Bang

If you feel yourself getting dry when you have sex with a condom, use this tip: slide two well-lubed fingers in a V-shape to simultaneously stroke yourself and press along the underside of your partner’s penis to give them the sensation of a tighter fit.

The Dam, Girl

ICYMI, you can still get chlamydia, gonorrhea, HPV, herpes, and syphilis from oral sex. Dental dams aka rectangular pieces of plastic you put over your vulva as a barrier between your mouth and genitals, can actually be super sexy if you know this trick. Have the receiver get on their hands and knees, and drape the dam over their vulva and anus. The giver can then get down and dirty with oral and rimming freely. This is also a great toe-in-the-water move for people who want to experiment with rimming.

The Show and Tell

Lie side by side and switch from masturbating each other and touching yourselves. You can show off what you’re into, teach your partner what works for you, and have things stay super hot and sexy with making out and eye contact if you desire.

Sex Positions to Try if Porn is Kinda Ruining Your Life

The Free Ride

If your partner’s reliance on porn is getting to the point that orgasming with an IRL person feels difficult, remember that an orgasm isn’t everything. Sex can be just as enjoyable without an orgasm, so do you and get on top and go crazy. Try new angles, speeds, leg positions, lingerie, and see what helps for getting you to orgasm.

The Teacher’s Pet

If you find your partner is taking too many hints from porn, you can work together to course-correct through a little demonstration. Guide their hands and mouth over you as you like, and make sure to use moans and light direction (positives like “yes,” “there,” “softer,” etc) to steer yourself to bliss.

The Crash Into Me

In a codependent rut with your favorite sex toy? Take a moment to ditch the toys and instead focus on simply enjoying your partner’s body without the pressure of racing to climax. Use this time to make out, kiss each other between the legs, lock in eye contact, and reset your physical connection with one another.

Sex Positions to Try if You Can’t Get Out of Your Head

The Banana Split

If letting someone else see your O-face gives you anxiety, have your partner enter you from behind while you rest on your stomach. Bend your knees against their thighs for deeper penetration and let yourself enjoy your orgasm, worry-free.

The Blindfold Bang

If having all eyes on you isn’t your definition of hot, putting a blindfold on your partner can help appease some of those worries. Not only is it a hot sensory deprivation thing for them, you’ll also feel way more empowered to move around in a way that gets you off.

The Backward Swoon

Prop your hips up on your partner’s legs so it’s almost like they’re wheelbarrowing you with your back on the bed. Have them enter you holding your hips for leverage while you use a vibrator on your clit. You’ve both got a great view, and the angle makes things super intense.

Easier Missionary Positions

Tight Squeeze

While your first instinct in missionary might be to keep your legs open, keep your legs straight down between his and your knees pressed tightly together. You can also angle your butt so you grind up against the top of his shaft for extra clitoral stimulation.

The Buzz Thrill

Get a couple's sex toy that's wearable with a flat side so it can fit between you and your partner. The dual stimulation will not only give your clit the focused attention it needs, but the internal vibration will also feel great for your partner.

Flip It Real Good

You get on top in the traditional dude position. Keep your legs between his, and prop yourself up on your hands or elbows. He can control the depth and angle by bending his knees and opening his legs for you.

Orgasm Faster

Hobby Horse

Straddle your partner's thigh and grind against it for some much-needed clitoral stimulation. You can add a sex toy into the mix as well. Anything wearable, with a flat edge to fit between you, or even a bullet vibe that you're comfortable holding in place, will work here.

The Pre Party

Sometimes the concentration required to bring you to orgasm can make it harder to get there. Let yourself relax, and use a toy to get you to the brink of orgasm while your partner kisses your neck and spoons you. When you're 75 percent there, let your partner take over control of the toy and take you the rest of the way there.

The Rag Doll

Let your body go limp like a rag doll and take long, deep breaths as you approach orgasm. While your first instinct might be to tense up, relax and see if that helps you get there faster.

Blow Job Positions

The Prop Engine

Sandwich a large vibrator between the box springs of your mattress or the frame of your couch. You can grind up against it while on your knees when you're giving him a BJ.

The Hump and Blow

Straddle a pillow between your legs and hump it while you go down on him in bed. You can also slip one hand under his leg to prop yourself up for stability while using your free hand to touch yourself.

The Yin Yang Edge

Lie sideways in a 69 position and trade off so one person is doing all the receiving at a time. Bring each other to the brink of orgasm and then trade off.

Vibrator Sex Positions

The Reacharound

Have your partner spoon you and stimulate your clit using a small bullet vibrator. They've got one free hand to touch your breasts, entangle your fingers together, whatever.

The Fly Away With Me

While resting with your back on a pillow, one of your legs around his back, and your foot against his chest, use your free hand to hold the vibe. He can thrust and enjoy the view while you concentrate on your orgasm.

The Give a Dog a Bone

The easiest, hands-free doggy style position out there. Prop your crotch up on a pillow and position a vibrator to hit your clit perfectly as he thrusts. With your hands free, you can grab ahold of the sheets as you writhe around in ecstasy.

Shower Sex Positions

Water Work It

This one's got something for everyone. While you go down on him, hold a removable shower head between your legs to stimulate your clit. Bonus: the odds of getting water in your eyes are pretty low with this one.

Wet 'n' Wild

Ride him in the tub with your hands on his shoulders for stability. You can rub your clit against his body this way while controlling depth. He's also free to lather up your boobs too, if that's something you're into.

The Bent-Over Bather

"But shower sex doesn't allow for crazier positions!" you say! Then you haven't tried the Bent-Over Bather. For this one, you'll want to steady yourself on something sturdy while your guy enters you in standing doggy. The rush of blood to your head is enough to up the ante on anything.

Doggy Style Variations

The Booty Pop

In a rush? Naked? Horny? You're in luck. Strip down naked and bend over a couch/side of the bed/stool/laundry hamper/whatever, and flash your butt to your dude because why the hell not. Brace yourself as he takes you from behind and don’t forget to look back every so often to admire the curve of your own back.

Give a Dog a Bone

Always wanted to try out spanking but never really been sure how to organically do it? Try this entry-level posish for optimal control. Get on your hands and knees on a bed or a couch — he's standing. Make sure you discuss limits and safe-words prior to diving in, so you can focus on the pain/pleasure dynamic while you’re in the moment. If you wanna get really into character, you can also incorporate some begging while the spanking is going on.

Don't Think You're Ready for This Jelly

It’s called 'jelly' because of all the lube you need for anal sex, haha get it? No but seriously, you will need a lot. For anal newbies and veterans alike, this spooning position is great because it allows you the space to relax and ease into it. Plus, no eye-contact! Feel free to make as many weird faces as you want.

Boob-centric Positions

The Golden Globes

Do your best Instagram influencer plank and go stiff as a board on top of your partner, squeezing your knees and thighs together to wiggle against them (the added friction is great for clitoral stimulation.) Dangle your boobs over their mouth and see if they can stand the torture.

The Ta-Ta Tease

Ah, ye old classic Titty Fuck of yore. So much more than schoolyard myth, this version lets you have a hand free so that it'll actually do something for you too. While seated on a couch or elsewhere with your back up (and with copious amounts of lube, because chafing is REAL), have your dude rub himself in between your valley of the shadow of death while you touch yourself. It’s like seeing a Broadway show in a small theatre — every seat has a good view!

Breast Friends

Have your guy sit on a chair and straddle him so he can give your boobs the up-close-and-personal attention they so deserve. Sitting in this position gives him the perfect access to lick or suck on your breasts, while you take control of the rhythm of night and bounce to your heart’s desire on his D. Should you have enough breast in the chest to do it, try joining him in on the action and licking yourself too.

It's Time to Get Pegged

Reverse Doggy Style

If you really wanna roll with the dominatrix dynamic of pegging, this is the way to go. Have your dude get on his elbows and knees in bed with his ass up, while you take him from behind. Brace your ankles against his calves for added stability and enjoy the ride. It’s a great view and if you get off on power, this is one of the hottest positions out there.

Reverse Cowboy

Lie on your bed with your head propped up on a pillow (yes, you DO deserve this view, girl) while your guy straddles your legs facing away from you, propping himself up on his elbows. He can control the speed at which he takes your strap-on, and keep a hand free to play with himself.

Chairman of the Board

It’s all about that view baby! Sit in a chair and have your guy straddle you, controlling the depth and speed with which he gets penetrated. This is great for beginners because it puts him in the drivers’ seat, while you get primo access to jerk him off from the front and/or nuzzle him with kisses. Either or.

Oral Sex Things He Needs to Learn ASAP

All Hail the Queen

Sitting on your dude’s face has got to be one of the sexiest and most empowering things you can do. Of course, you’re not supposed to actually sit-sit on his whole face, but instead to straddle his head and lower yourself and adjust to whatever suits your taste. You can prop yourself up on your arms if you get tired, or work those thighs while grinding up and down his face while he moves your butt.

The Leg Up

Lay on the side of your bed on your back with one leg up and one leg down while your guy goes to town on you while kneeling against the bed. This position leaves you wide open and frees up your dude’s neck muscles from getting a cramp so he can keep doing that thing you like even longer.

Doggy Goes Oral

Get on your knees and elbows while your dude eats you out from behind. If you need some extra assistance, slip a hand down below and play with yourself, and prop yourself up on some pillows. You can grind up against your partner’s face and dip your body as you please to control the angle. If you’re feeling extra adventurous, you can also have your partner eat your ass from this position too. Hey, just a suggestion.

BJ Positions You'll Both Love

The Mouth Off

Lie with your head nearly dangling off the edge of the bed and touch yourself while taking your guy in your mouth. While this is not a move for beginners, submissive folks will certainly enjoy the power play of surrendering control. Plus, that rush of blood to the head is definitely something fun.

Open Wide and Say "Ahhhh"

Consider this a sexier version of the classic 69. Have your dude lie on his back while you straddle him and give him an upside down beej. Stick your booty up and out so he can use your favorite toy or his fingers to bring you to completion, all while enjoying the sexy front-row view.

The Auto Blow

Similar to the Mouth Off, prop your head on some pillows with your guy kneeling behind you and take him into your mouth. You can use your hands to touch yourself, or keep them on his shaft to stay in control of the pacing and angle.

So, You Want to Have a Threesome

The 69, Plus One

It’s like a pinwheel of dick! For this position, you’ll want to all get on your sides and form a circle so you’re all giving and receiving. If you feel like not enough attention is being paid to you, you can also have the guy who’s supposed to be going down on you, use a vibrator or his fingers instead.

The Happy Cuckold

Sit against your main guy’s chest and dangle your legs over the butt of your third partner while he enters you. Your main guy gets a helluva view and the close contact is a huge turn on for you too.

The Double Blind Bind

Make sure you’ve really established all your boundaries and safe words before trying this one, because it does take a certain level of trust to pull off. For this, put on a blindfold and have one of your partners tie your knees to your wrist (gently, and with slack to rock around and still enjoy a reasonable range of motion). Have them take turns entering and going down on you and guess who’s doing what based on their touch and sounds alone. And if the idea of being tied up and blindfolded is too much, it also works if you just close your eyes.

Get Down With Yourself for Some Solo Sex

The Long Way Around

Trying to spice it up a bit? Try masturbating while face down and reaching your hands around the back and through your legs. If you need an extra boost, throw a pillow under your hips for added oomph.

The Slip and Slide

If you’re lucky enough to have unfettered access to a pool or hot tub with jets, try saddling up next to the jets so the running water hits your bits in all the right places. Just make sure you’re alone first!

Pretend Lover

Pop a squat on a suction cup dildo affixed to the surface of your choice and go to down. Even if you don’t orgasm from penetration, that doesn’t mean it can’t still feel AMAZING. Plus, for the normally shy, this lets you act out all your wild sex fantasies without an audience — for now.

Sex Positions for Ladies Who Like Ladies

The Breast Enhancement

Have your partner lean against a pillow with her legs open while you kneel in between them. Then, lean in so only your nipples are touching and rub her clit with your hand or a vibrator. Tease her by pausing from time to time to kiss her breasts or nipples.

Defying Gravity

You might have to test drive all the chairs in your household to find a low one that allows you to reach the ground and support yourself before diving into this one, but when you do, it’ll be worth it. Have your partner sit on said chair while you kneel with your ass in her face, straddling her. Bend so your booty is in the air and prop your hands up on the ground for extra support while she goes to town on you. The rush of blood to the head will make it all worth it.

The Strap-on Sizzle

If you have a strap-on and a dildo, this is a great classic take on missionary. Enter her, making sure your nipples brush up against each other with every thrust. If you’re both comfortable with it too, this is a great position to try while one of you has her arms tied up above her head too.

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Carina Hsieh Sex & Relationships Editor Carina Hsieh is one of the Sex & Relationships Editors at Cosmopolitan.com.

Source: https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/positions/a9955495/sex-positions-guide/

[warmbeebosoftbeebo]

I've gotten into Shawn Mendes lately eg how kind he is, his rather effeminate voice (I like a lot of stereotyped as "gay" voices, and a lot of what's stereotyped as gay/effeminate generally), he's such a soft boy I swear to fuck. Gorgeous as hell too, ngl. What a fucking sweetheart. I am debating reading smut fic about him. Should I? Is there any that would be up my alley?

I'm hoping that at least with him it wouldn't be standard porn maledom crap but most of the sexual side of fandom even did that with our "subby" minxy nymph B so I'm going in suspecting I'll be disappointed/have hesitated in diving into smut about him in part because my expectations ain't high. Unfortunately. (He's also a decade younger than me which also lends to the hesitation.) (Seriously are men ever allowed to not be "daddy doms" and the like, do they ever get seen as sexual in a hetero context, desirable without that, fuck's sake. This is even common in romance novels ie he's a cinnamon roll out of bed but it's typical maledom when it comes to sex.)

And that's not even getting into wanting vulva/clit-centric sex, with little to prefersbly no piv. Which would likely be an even higher bar.

[warmbeebosoftbeebo]

i've been reading your works on ao3 and pls don't feel bad. i'm a 23 yo woman and have been enjoying them. i thought i was the only one into frottage since stupid ass men i've been with said i was weird. we exist!! haha

I'm going to assume the second message of "and guy butt" is from you too 😋

NGL, I feel like an outsider a lot re: sex things, inc het tribadism generally, which is one of (a set of?) the most erased sex acts, aspects of sex I'm into, to the point most can't even imagine it. (even if they do in a FF context, they can't in a FM one. Even when they know that diff types of frottage w a dick exist, they can't even imagine it with a vulva. There's such an erasure of clit/vulva-centric sex. The penis, entry is what defines sex under patriarchy, and things are actually getting narrower, worse for women, girls growing up, in the last decade but I'll spare your ask even more of my going on.)

Another eg: how "daddy dom" & ddlg is such a thing culturally online & irl (part of overall feminist backlash driven largely by internet porn) when I want a brother. (And it has been informed by my politics eg my sexuality as a preteen was very diff from how it is now, let alone how it starting changing at 12 through my teens. Eg I used to be into porn as a pre-teen (but this was pre internet tubesite porn, so not nearly as bad as what's normal now), very piv-centric, etc.)

(It also largely drove my being trans, wanting to be a gay male, from 12-16. But I digress again 😆)

Ime, bi guys are generally a lot more open to it 😉 including on their bums, backs, etc fwiw. Tend to be a lot more open, curious, exploratory, nymphy, "subby", etc. And avoid jocks, fraternity types, go for drama/music/arts boys, "nerdy" boys, other kinds that don't fit in with most guys... (This also holds up in the small amount of research I've been able to find comparing men who id as bi vs straight eg more cunnilingus, more genital-genital contact, less piv.)

And, I swear, even aesthetically/lookswise, most men's asses are works of art lol. Seriously, give me a booty pic over a dick pic any day 😆 esp when you also see the back, backs of the thighs, maybe even scrotum peeking out too ... 🤤 nom nom nom & grabby hands while I think of smooching, swatting, petting, squeezing, massaging, and of course lots of humping over said bum, back, thighs, balls... Fjskakfhsk

Seriously, "butt sex"/butt fucking"/etc would mean tribadism (rubbing the vulva) on a guys butt (FF tribadism, mm & mf frottage on/between the buttocks) in a matriarchy, I swear 😁