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keikaru · 11 months ago

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Navy Bird - Pirates in Love

Originally written in 2019. Edited in 2024.

This fandom may be dead, but I’m still here with content! During my FF.net days, lots of readers really wanted my OC from “Pirates in Reminisce Island” to end with Eduardo (and so do I). Dedicating this fic to my old PIL readers if you’re out there. <3

Synopsis: Mina is the daughter of a naval officer. She believes in the law and justice, but soon enough, she discovers corruption is rampant among officers. When she points out their amoral behavior, they turn their weapons on her. She injures one of them out of self-defense but is afraid of their retaliation on the priory. In a strange twist of fate, a member of the Sirius crew saves her, which leads her to reevaluate her beliefs about the pirates.

(You can read this story without any knowledge of PIL.)

Navy Bird

I was raised to believe that navy officers were moral men driven by justice and chivalry.

So why did my hand grip a blade and turned it against men of virtue and righteousness? Officers who were meant to be defenders of the helpless, men who were meant to be incorruptible and deemed worthy of a medal pinned to their lapel…why was itI who raised a hand in defiance to their cruelty?

“You’ll pay for that you wretched whore!” One of the officers yelled, before turning his attention back to his wounded comrade.

I lowered my gaze to the injured man. His back was against the wall as he hunched over, hand pressed over the injury. A crimson stain flourished from underneath his palm, blotting his ivory uniform into a color that matched the wickedness in his heart.

Before the men reacted, I turned and fled from the dim alley. My boots hit the ground, and I heard my heartbeat thunder in my ears.

Adrenaline coursed through my veins as I ran into the night. Darkness found me, steadied me, and told me I would be safe if I kept moving.

I wanted to cry and spill the contents of my dinner onto the ground but was held back by my fear of being caught. My fate was tied to the morning sun, but I couldn’t abandon the priory. They took me in after my father died. The least I could do was warn them about the officer’s retaliation.

The priory would be set ablaze, that much I knew. At the very least, I could warn them about the officer’s retaliation and give them enough time to leave.

I bit my tongue. I held no love for the bastards that seized my town. I knew violence was wrong, but the pain the officer felt was less compared to my people.

Hot tears blurred my vision as I bolted blindly past a bar. A silhouette flickered ahead, and I narrowly avoided a well-dressed man.

“Lass, you’re—”

I skirted around him and hid myself in the dark.

Paranoia struck a powerful chord within me. Every voice and shadow that passed stirred a deep uneasiness inside my chest. To calm myself, I counted backwards from twenty.

When footsteps passed, I exhaled and set out again.

Up ahead, I saw the priory. All the windows were dark and curtained. I hurried along the abandoned road and prayed that someone heard the commotion and notified them to leave.

With every step I took toward the crumbling building, I realized the gravity of the situation. Where would the elderly and children go if the building burned? How would the prioress react? Will the officers harm them?

No. They only knew my face and my face alone. Everyone else was safe. I had to believe that.

As I approached the doorway, someone seized my arm. In that split second, I wondered if my blade would taste another man’s blood tonight.

I whirled around and without thinking, I brandished my blade.

When I met their eyes, it was a man.

The frown on his face was illuminated by the lantern he held. His pristine uniform signified his status in the navy.

Was he that bargoer?

As he stepped closer to me, he held a musket in his other hand. I blanched. How did he find me? Had he been trailing me? It was futile, but I lunged forward with my blade.

He sidestepped me and jabbed the musket at me. I dodged his attack, but the muzzle caught the frills of my blouse. As I scrambled to get away, he only grinned and threw me against the wooden door of the priory.

I cried out and dropped my blade as pain seared throughout my collarbone. He pressed the muzzle against my clavicle, and I gritted my teeth. My flimsy blouse was a thin layer against his cold, callous weapon.

I struggled, but he only pressed the weapon harder against me.

“If only you’d let us have our fun,” the man mused, bringing the lantern close to my face. I winced at the sudden brightness. “If it weren’t for your pretty face, this damned place would have burned down a long time ago. Funny how you’d sully yourself just to protect this shit hole of a home.”

The officer laughed, setting the lantern on the ground. He moved closer and stepped on the blade, preventing me from reaching it. With the musket still pressed to my body, he leaned forward and grabbed my chin, prying my mouth open with his thumb.

I held my gaze as he observed me, eyes raking down my torn blouse. I bristled with rage and kept quiet.

He clicked his tongue in amusement and released my chin.

“Your father was an honorable officer. He died while defending his values, you know. A virtuous man until the end.” He reached up and brushed a stray strand of hair from my face. “It’s poetic the daughter will die the same way.”

Immediately, he struck me across the face. I gasped out in pain and cradled a hand to my cheek, blinking back tears.

“I hate women like you.” He grabbed a fistful of my hair and forced me to look up. A scathing look mingled with disgust crossed his features. It unsettled me. “Educated, perceptive, and beautiful—pah. Women are creatures of obedience and ignorance. Not a single thought should cross that pretty little head of yours. Your father tainted you, spoiled you with the delights only a man should have.”

“My father wasn’t bound by tradition,” I spat out, twisting away from his grip. “He gifted me with knowledge because he knew I could stand as an equal in this world.”

The officer threw his head back and laughed. “Your father was a fool. His ideas of virtue and valor only made others laugh at him. He believed officers were the hand of justice in these unprecedented times.” He curled a hand around my neck but didn’t suffocate me—yet. I clawed at his gloved hand in vain as he pressed against my neck. “If he let us have our way, he wouldn’t have died, you know.”

“What are you trying to get at?” I demanded.

He slowly tightened his grip around my throat.

The officer smiled wickedly at me. “I killed him. The fool had it coming.”

The strength in my arms sapped as I stopped prying at his hands. I could only stare back in horror.

“…what?”

He was lying. I was told that my father died an honorable death—defending the townsfolk from a pirate invasion. This officer had to be lying. I had no reason to believe him. He was a lying, dishonorable cur through and through. He was goading me. Inciting rage.

But why? Why did he stare at me with those hateful eyes, filled with malice and the certainty that he did, in fact, murder my father?

“You—you bastard,” I managed out unevenly. My vision blurred as something warm rolled down my face. Something stirred within me—a rage boiled from the very depths of my heart.

Before I knew it, I ripped the musket from my blouse, string and fabric fluttering in the air. The officer took a step back, bewildered by my forcefulness. I couldn’t think properly, only blinded by pure anger I never knew laid dormant inside me.

He hastily fired a shot but missed. The bullet lodged itself into the door behind me. I grabbed the blade from the ground and charged at him while tears rolled fresh down my face.

For tonight, I was not a killer. Only an agent of retribution.

He sidestepped my attack and swung the musket. I held up my right arm up and shielded myself from the blow. My arm screamed from pain when the musket collided, but I cared not. The man brought his weapon back and swung again—this time, in a wide arc.

I moved back but found myself cornered at the priory entrance.

He grinned, several feet away, and positioned the weapon over his shoulder, poised to fire.

By the time I threw the blade, he would have pulled the trigger. But if I hit his hand, his aim would falter, and I could escape. It was risky, but I was already a dead woman.

I accepted that I had no fate in the morning.

So I prayed. I prayed wherever I ended up, I hoped my father would forgive me for hurting another person.

The shot fired, and I fully expected to die. But the officer dropped his weapon and knelt.

“Arggh!”

From what I saw, his white pant leg was dyed crimson. I squinted and saw another figure in the dark, not too far from where we stood, brandishing his own gun.

“You’ve harassed the lass long enough.”

My savior stepped forward, but it was difficult to tell who he was. He donned an eyepatch and was dressed in dark colors.

Under the moonless sky, I sensed that he was familiar.

Before thanking my savior, I turned to the officer on the ground. I took quick, short steps to the man. He groaned in pain and tried to reach for his weapon as I approached.

I kicked the musket far from his reach and before I knew it, I tackled him to the ground and hit him in the face. He cursed at me and called me derogatory names. No matter how many times he called me a bitch, wretch, or whore I hit him as hard as I could.

“I hope you rot in hell!” I screamed, as tears flowed freely down my face. “You took my father from me. You ruined my town. You smeared the name of navy officers and destroyed the foundation of justice and truth I believed in…! You…you’re nothing but…!”

The man below me continued to swear but stopped resisting. Finally, I dropped my hands. I huffed and glared at him, feeling exhaustion overtaking me. As I glanced at my knuckles, blood coated them.

“Kill me, why don’t you…? If it eases your pain.” He mocked, blood running down his nose. He spat out blood beside him and appeared smug. “Another will take my place even if you kill me. So do it, little lady. Do it because by tomorrow morning, you’ll be killed.”

I suddenly remembered my blade.

Wildly, I grabbed for it. Why did I ever set it down?

My emotions were strung high, scattered between grief, animosity, and rage. It was difficult to think clearly. But this man, this pathetic, rotten excuse of an official—I loathed him. I loathed him with every fiber of my being. I bristled with ferocity when I remembered the other corrupted officials who abandoned their duty and sunk deep into wickedness.

I held the blade above my head. Time slowed. The officer below me only grinned. He welcomed it. He embraced death by my hands.

I could kill him. Kill him and avenge my father. Kill him, kill him, kill him, the voice echoed in my head. Tomorrow didn’t exist. Only in this moment did I have the chance to end his life like he ended my father’s.

But the hand that held the blade trembled. It wouldn’t budge.

Tears streamed down my face as I gazed at the man. He looked pitiful, bruised and reduced to a bloody pulp. He returned my stare. Do it, his eyes urged. Put me out of my misery.

Just then, a hand closed over my knuckles.

I glanced over my shoulder while his hand still clasped mine.

“That’s enough, lass.” My savior’s voice was quiet, soothing.

He wore a long, ruddy colored coat lined with gold buttons. It looked luxurious and sturdy, so much more than I could ever afford. Suddenly, I forgot about the officer below me and realized my tattered attire. I held a hand to my chest to preserve what dignity I had left. My savior turned his eye away from mine and glanced at the bloodied officer instead.

“He won’t harm you anymore. Not in that state.”

I lowered my blade and numbly nodded my head.

My savior helped me to my feet and guided me away from the officer. The officer let out another string of curses, but he grew quiet as we left the priory.

I slid the blade back into my boot and secured it in its hidden sheath.

The man with the eyepatch led me somewhere quiet, and to where—I knew not. He spoke in a soothing tone, calming me from my grief-stricken state. Whatever he said, it was lost on me. I was glad that he spoke, speaking about nonsense to distract me from my dark thoughts.

He seemed very kind despite his sharp gaze. The man then offered me a tin flask and I realized it contained alcohol. Seldom did I touch alcohol, but I needed something to assuage my nerves. I drank it eagerly but slowed once the bitter flavor scorched down my throat. I coughed and wiped my mouth before handing back the flask.

He pocketed it and continued.

For a while, we walked in companionable silence. Nobody milled about, as many were fearful of the night patrols by the navy. But knowing the officers, they were most likely at bars or red districts.

The cool air dried my tears, but my nose was colored red. I held my blouse close to my chest to preserve my modesty, but my right shoulder had a gaping hole. Frills and loose thread dangled everywhere, and if I had the materials, I would mend it later.

My thoughts whirled around as we walked, further from the light of the central district. The navy would hunt me down. Those living at the priory would have to leave. My town was already in shambles. And where was I supposed to go?

I looked ahead, seeing my savior’s back. I didn’t have a good look at his face, but he seemed oddly familiar. We never met in person, but I have seen him somewhere before. Perhaps in passing?

“Sir,” I quivered out. I was unsure if he heard me. He kept walking. “May I know your name? And, um, thank you.” I let out a shaky sigh. “For helping me. I am grateful.”

He paused so abruptly that I collided with his back.

“You’re welcome.”

I didn’t press further for his name, as I realized I haven’t introduced myself either. I found myself staring at his back as he continued walking. He had broad shoulders and moved with a confident stride.

I wonder why he saved me. Did he have his own motive? Or was it out of selflessness?

I halted.

He noticed I was no longer following him due to the absence of footfalls. He partly turned, craning his neck to look at me.

“What’re you doing, lass?” He sounded impatient. “If you don’t come along, they’ll find you.”

“Where are we going?” I asked quietly. My fingers gripped the fabric of my shirt. “At least tell me where we’re going. You have my gratitude, but you don’t fully have my trust.”

“You followed me this far and now you want an explanation?” He ran a hand through his dark hair, exasperated. “Talk about priorities. Fine—I’ll explain along the way. But first, we need to get you out of this town. You know they’ll be looking for you in the morning.”

“I know.” I began to walk again, following him. He moved, but with a sense of urgency this time. “They’ll have a bounty for my head soon. That much I’m aware.”

His strides were longer and faster than mines. I struggled to keep up.

“At the very least, my crew can drop you off at another port. You can start anew there,” he said this with finality, with no room for argument. “It’ll be difficult, but I believe you can manage. You have tenacity from what I’ve seen.”

I grew quiet again. Tears brimmed in my eyes as I thought about the events from earlier. My body ached, especially my right arm and collarbone. While I failed to see tomorrow, he was already planning my next course of action as if he was familiar with this life. Whatever this life meant. Things were moving too fast, but it was impossible to fight the pull of time. But how could he be so levelheaded in this situation? It was too much to handle. Some things sunk in, but other things didn’t.

I tipped my head back and looked up at the sky.

Above us, a few seagulls cawed and glided through the oil slick night. Stars shimmered, as if offering hope. What will tomorrow bring? I thought. What port town awaits me? As the man strode onwards, I spoke again.

“My name is Mina.” I fiddled with the loose threads of my blouse. With my free hand, I brushed the tears away. “My father was a virtuous naval officer, unlike those you just saw. And, um, my mother—she was a dancer. Both my parents died, so the priory took me in. I tried to stop the officers from taxing what little we have.”

He was quiet as he listened to my story. After a respectful pause, he spoke. “Eduardo. Just Eduardo is fine, lass. I don’t care much for formalities.”

“Ah.” I said flatly. “Eduardo. As in…Sirius?”

The name registered, but my reaction was mild. I was emotionally and physically exhausted from the events before and wasn’t as shocked as I thought I would be. Normally, fear would have gripped me, but I felt hollow. Today was already a strange day, only making room for stranger events and stranger people.

“I’ve heard the awful rumors, but I can’t believe them. Not after today because you saved my life.” I shook my head and laughed weakly. Eduardo looked at me as if I lost a few screws. Of course, there was nothing to laugh about. But I found it absurd all the same.

“You’re a member of the Sirius crew,” I mumbled, trying to make sense of everything, “pirates have saved me from the navy. Who would have thought? But isn’t the navy supposed to protect its citizens? So why—” I balled my fists, my voice rising out of confusion and anger— “why were they abusing their authority and burdening the townsfolk? Why do they exploit the weak and tax the church? Aren’t they supposed to protect? To uphold the law? Then why, why did they abandon their duty? To whom am I supposed to turn to when I need justice?”

I was frustrated beyond measure. It didn’t make sense. Officers were supposed to be paragons of goodness. Pirates were supposed to be bad. But reality was never that simple.

My tears were relentless. Every being of my body shook as I thought of my father—the only good man among the corrupted. There had to be others, but they were so little and few in between.

“All my life, I grew up believing the navy officers were good men. But now I could see that I was blind. I fooled myself, making excuses whenever the officers committed any wrongdoings. I was blind, wasn’t I? So willfully ignorant. I looked away because I didn’t want to believe it. But no,” I spat out bitterly, my vision blurring. “Not anymore. I won’t make up excuses for them any longer. I won’t turn away. And to think…to think that the infamous Sirius pirates would save me instead. I don’t know what to believe anymore.”

“Then don’t,” Eduardo murmured quietly. “Your whole belief system built over the years just shattered in an instant. Anyone would breakdown.”

“So what do I do now?”

My legs gave out and my knees hit the ground. I pounded the ground with my balled-up fist. Desperation overwhelmed me as I tried to search for an answer. Anything to guide me in the right direction. Anything to latch onto, knowing what I believed in, has betrayed me.

I would have to start anew—a new name, new town, a fresh start. But what about everything I’ve known here? This measly port town was the only one I knew. I knew nothing of the world beyond where my feet could take me. I didn’t even say goodbye to the ones I loved and cared for at the priory.

“How am I supposed to forget this?” I sobbed, cradling my injured hand to my chest. “This is the only life I’ve known. I can’t leave it behind so easily.”

He didn’t look at me, only up at the sky. “Some turn to religion for comfort. Some learn to move on. As for you,” he fully turned, his coat billowed in the wind as he faced me. “That’s up to you to figure out, lass. But at the very least—”

With the backdrop of stars and an air of solemnity surrounding him, Eduardo knelt in front of me.

“Come with me, Mina,” he said calmly. I couldn’t help but believe in his words like scripture. “I can guarantee your safety.”

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foolish-rat · 1 month ago

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Commentary on RTTE S1 Ep 13 Total Nightmare

This is one of my favorite episodes in the show and I don’t see enough people talking about it.

Ruff: And so the drama begins...

Tuff: One man, one dragon, one leg, vs one rapidly closing dome.

Guys, I love the twins so much. They have a new hyperfixation every other day and it’s amazing. Also, Tuff, you ain’t gotta do my boy Hiccup like that 😭

Tuff: 'Twas once a drill, then it became a game, now it is theater!

Ruff: Let the drama unfold!

Ruff’s little pose here. I love her so so so much

Tuff: I'll wager he loses an eye.

Ruff: Haha! On the contrary, i predict act one, scene one will conclude with the loss of a gallbladder.

Tuff: Or perhaps a leg, what say you, young Hiccup?

Again with the leg jokes. Me personally, I wouldn’t take that level of disrespect.

The whole scene with Snotlout racing is just him getting hit with branches. How is my man not concussed, bro got a skull made of gronckle iron 💀 Also, he 100% could’ve made that if he didn’t spend 5 seconds shouting at Hookfang

Hookfang refusing the fish and then throwing not only the fish but Snotlout as well 😭

Snotlout: Ow, hey, everybody saw that right?

Tuff: Yes we did, my friend and it was delightful.

Tuff… 😭

Snotlout: No I mean Hookfang, he's acting weird.

Fishlegs: How's that?

Snotlout: Well, he didn't listen to me during the race, he ran away, he just spit fish in my face, and threw me against the wall!

The wall in question:

Also Fishlegs, why are you smiling

Hookfang slamming his head against the roof multiple times, I’m not entirely sure what the plan was there. Like, I feel like that was probably the least productive thing he could’ve done.

Snotlout’s face here. This is probably how the other riders see him

Hookfang was put in time out. Free my man, he ain’t do nothing wrong 🗣️

Snotlout: Hey! Hookfang, you feeling better? Who wants tuna for breakfast?

That is NOT a tuna, also why is it so big???

Snotlout: Great. I accept your offer to help in the search. Come on, Toothless. Up, bud! Fly, bud! Do something, bud!

Hiccup really does call Toothless bud a lot. It means a lot to me that the other riders notice this as well.

Toothless is so done with Snotlout

Snotlout: This place again? This is where I found him last time.

Why wasn’t that the first place he checked???

Astrid: Look! There is another Monstrous Nightmare!

Hiccup: That's not just another Monstrous Nightmare. That's a female Monstrous Nightmare.

You can tell because she is pink and pink is a girl color

Snotlout: A female Monstrous Nightmare? Now it all makes sense. My dragon has a way with the ladies! Must have picked up a few pointers from his master.

Astrid: I doubt it. She's not dry heaving.

L rizz from Snotlout

Snotlout try not to get injured challenge: impossible

Fishlegs: it means that meeting this female has reawakened his primal instincts. And he’s returning to the wild.

Fishlegs successfully predicting the third movie.

Fishlegs: It's nature, Snotlout. You can't fight it.

Snotlout: Watch me.

Ate that line up

Hiccup: It's a scary idea, huh? That one of our dragons might just one day go back to the wild? You'd never do that to me, would you bud? I didn't think so.

Uh…

Snotlout: Primal instincts, Thor's butt! My primal instinct is to get my dragon back.

Another banger line

Snotlout: Hi, Girl Hookfang! I see, you already got my boy bringing dinner for you. Big step.

He’s jealous

He got hit in the face with an eel. Real talk, I wanna know how this man is still alive. This is gonna be a long rant analyzing the effect of an injury in a kids tv show, skip ahead if you don’t want to read this part.

There are 3 different things that determine the severity of the shock and the resulting injury; the amount of voltage, the duration of the shock, and path of the shock through the body. Unfortunately, Snotlout did not have a single thing going well for him and managed to have the worst luck in all 3 areas. Electricity is extremely dangerous. 120 volts going through the human body for only 2 seconds is enough to cause death. Electric eels can produce charges on average from 450-600 volts of electricity. Some have been recorded to produce up to 860 volts. For comparison, outlets only use 120 volts. The duration of the shock effects how severe the injury is. Unsurprisingly, the longer the shock, the greater the injury. Snotlout was electrocuted for about 3-5 seconds which is a pretty long time, especially since a single shock from an eel is enough to cause significant pain or immobilize their prey. An important thing to note is that the eel is on land. Without water to disperse some of the shock, it would be stronger and more direct. He was hit in the face, and the eel landed on his chest, where it continuously shocked him for 3-5 seconds. Currents through the heart or nervous system are most dangerous. A shock to the head will cause your nervous system to be damaged. A shock to the chest is incredibly dangerous as it gives direct access to the body’s most vital organs. He managed to get shocked in the two worst places to get shocked.

Long story short, I have no idea how this mf is alive.

Snotlout: I have had enough of you, Hookfang! It's time to choose, her or me.

Genuinely sobbing

Tuff: Classic romantic comedy paradigm. Boy gets dragon, boy loses dragon, dragon falls asleep, boy eats, boy falls asleep, dragon eats.

What is he going on about???

Snotlout: I give up. If being with her makes Hookfang happy, I guess I should be happy for him, too. Ugh. If you'll excuse me, I think I'm going to go lay down for a few... weeks.

🥺

Hiccup: We've gotta get him back in the saddle right away.

Hiccup, not everyone solves their problems by working

Snotlout: Too small, too slow, two heads.

This is genuinely one of my favorite jokes in the entire series.

Hiccup: What are you saying?

Snotlout: I'm saying that if I can't fly Hookfang, I don't want to fly any dragon.

Astrid: How can you be a dragon rider and not ride a dragon?

Snotlout: You were always the smart one, Astrid.

🥺

Snotlout: Quitting, that's right. ✨I shall be a dragon rider no more✨

Why did he say it like that-

Tuff: Time to call in the understudy.

Ruff: Hey Fishlegs, how's your Snotlout?

immediately looking for a replacement 💀

Hiccup: Oh, come on Snotlout, you're just hurting now, that's all. Give it some time.

Snotlout: No, Hiccup, my mind is made up. I'm going to say goodbye to Hookfang, and then sail back to Berk for good. It's over.

genuinely heartbreaking

Astrid: You wanna tell us what's going on here?

Fishlegs: It looks like two male dragons fighting over a female.

Ruff: Yeah, I've heard male Vikings do it too, but I've personally never seen it.

Give it a few years, Ruff

Hiccup: Get him, Snotlout! You guys can do this.

Astrid: Hey, be careful. He's pretty nasty.

Snotlout: Whatever happens to us, promise me you'll protect those eggs.

Hiccup: We will.

🥺

Astrid: He's crazy.

Hiccup: He's Snotlout.

Astrid: True.

Couldn’t have put it better myself

The evil smirk. Bro got a diabolical scheme

Snotlout: And to think I saved them. Okay, okay! We saved them. We saved them. Snotlout, Hookfang! Oi! Oi! Oi!

Love that he’s chanting both of their names.

Hiccup: Uh, what's wrong with you two?

Ruff: Nothing.

Tuff: You just don't see enough happy endings these days. Snotlout! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!

The twins are so dramatic, I love them so much

Okay that’s it 💕

#httyd #rtte #how to train your dragon #race to the edge #httyd rtte #hiccup haddock #httyd toothless #hookfang #httyd fishlegs #fishlegs ingerman #snotlout jorgenson #httyd astrid #httyd ruffnut #ruffnut thorston #ruffnut and tuffnut #httyd tuffnut #tuffnut thorston

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sinisterexaggerator · 3 months ago

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Summary: Nick Valentine hardly ever leaves your thoughts, but you're barely on his radar. Your infatuation takes a rather interesting turn; you're caught red-handed in his bed, wearing candy apple lipstick and a freshly laundered dress. What is to become of you? Will you be able to confess your feelings, or will you run away instead?

Warning: NSFW / 18+ for masturbation/being caught in the act, kissing, cunnilingus, fingering, mild wire play, angst, drama, "love" confessions, and sass.

Word count: 5.9K

Notes: I may make a part two for this after "you" get to know each other a little better. I don't see Nick letting just anybody play with his innards all willy-nilly, but I had a lot of fun writing it!

Read on Ao3

It wasn’t an eyesore, and neither was the Synth who owned it, luminescent neon laid out in letters, an arrhythmic fluctuation in voltage causing a delay in current every three point five seconds—you had counted.

How could a man with the last name Valentine—whose brand was marked with a heart pierced by Cupid’s arrow—not see the underlying machinations from which your attention spurred?

He was a detective, no less, unable to work out your motivations, not understanding that every nuance—every quirk of your lips, every gleam in your eye, every smile—was for him, because of him, and that you had long ago fallen for his wit, his charm, his mind, and for his heart.

A man who wasn’t a man—thrown together in some lab—though that needn’t be your concern. It mattered little if he was flesh and bone or biomechanical, though his kind was greatly feared and for good reason.

Nick was different, he was a diamond in the rough of Diamond City, shining more brightly than even the Valentine Detective Agency’s ostentatious signage. A do-gooder who never tired, a being whose higher purpose rested not with himself, but with others, giving more to the people of the Commonwealth than they rightfully deserved.

For all the hate, intolerance, and ignorance Nick dealt with on the daily, he dished out love, empathy and acceptance in equal measure, though he was not one to take an insult lying down.

He was also passionate; fiery beneath a calm and collected disposition, his habitually stoic makeup a steadying force and welcomed counterbalance to the restless biome that flourished within these walls.

It was when he spoke to you the first time that you became enamored with his personality, whether artificial, finding him to be bold and charismatic. He had asked what brought you to the neighborhood—you were a trader who lost your caravan, your guards, nothing left but the caps in your pocket.

Luckily for you, a man named Arturo Rodriguez had been contemplating the idea of extending his hours for quite some time, his competition employing a salvaged Mister Handy named Percy to sell goods even in the dead of night—it was a case of being in the right place at the right time, one you were thankful for.

It became engrained into his subroutine, these evening visitations, Nick sharing bits and pieces of his history with you for a lack of customers, though oftentimes short and sweet as he kept himself busy. There was always a new crime to be investigated, or a new case to be solved.

Truth be told, the detective was worried about you—a solitary woman—being out there by your lonesome at such late hours. All kinds of riffraff ushered themselves in off the streets, not caring what time of the day it was.

Diamond City was a safe haven as much as it was a magnet for undesirables, those men and women of ill repute that made life difficult for hardworking people just trying to get by. Security could only do so much; it was common for slime to slip through the cracks, portions of the city less fortified than others.

Still, Nick felt Arturo ought to be ashamed, getting a broad to do his dirty work. Little did he know this job had been a godsend, or that you were tougher than a two-dollar steak and twice as hard to chew.

Call him a gentleman, but Valentine, on more than one occasion, had gone out of his way unbeknownst to you, changing his route home simply to check in on your stall.

“Workin’ hard, or hardly workin’?” Nick had inquired, the corner of his mouth creeping upward to indicate his offhanded chiasmus was merely a good-natured tease.

“You know me,” you had answered back, “total slacker.”

“Stickin’ it to the man, glad to hear it,” he would drawl, voice dry and deadpan yet soothing to the ears. Even though Nick was cordial with Arturo, he didn’t mind having a joke at his expense.

“Doing my part,” you replied, wishing he’d step closer, wishing he would stay and chat a while.

“Stay out of trouble, doll,” he’d warn, tipping the brim of his hat; you were in awe at how a single monosyllabic word could drive you toward such filthy imaginings as you were then, reveling in that passing instant he had paid you mind.

Mission accomplished, Nick would wander off to park himself at the Agency, unaware that for the rest of the night your mind was wholly occupied by impure thoughts—and it was all his fault. It was ridiculous that a simple term of endearment expressed so casually could nearly short-circuit your human brain, yet here you were.

Could he make love to you if you asked? Would he touch you if you begged him to?

You supposed his existence was an adventurous one, wishing you could participate in something other than this humdrum life, though you assumed you ought to be grateful you were alive at all.

But it unnerved you—angered you to no end— to hear the drivel that oozed like poison from out the mouths of bigots when they spoke of Nick Valentine in his absence. They declared he was not sentient, that an intelligence such as his was naïve to think of itself as self-aware, as if they were any more autonomous than he, choosing to act of their own free-will by way of insults and disgraceful slurs.

Arturo had been accommodating, allowing you the top floor of his home until you could get on your feet. Such things were heard from rooftops, echoing beyond thin strips of sheet metal to leech its way into your ears. You roosted, enjoying the wide-open view of the sky and the clouds drifting by, only for your mood to sour, tempted to shout obscenities at the offender—usually Myrna— from your place in the dark.

You valued Nick’s company despite the rumors or the gossip about the Institute, ignoring the fact he was a Synth. You wondered if something was wrong with you, finding your short exchanges to be a thousand times more stimulating than any discourse with your neighbors—Valentine’s smile alone was worth more than all the caps in the world.

You often daydreamed about his cybernetic eyes looking down at you from your place atop his mattress, bright as sunbeams, imbued with radiant golden light. They were the windows to his soul—and you were convinced he had one— no one could tell you otherwise.

Then, more questions came. Could man love machine? Could machine love man? Ethical quandaries that knew no bounds. Those of narrow minds might call it an abomination in the eyes of God, while for others it might cause confusion, or effectuate ridicule.

Somehow, none of that would matter, not if Nick returned what was undeniably blossoming into not just admiration, but desire. Could Synths feel desire? Could androids dream?

And the man did flirt, if only feigning attraction, but not with you—you did not assume you were boring or undesirable, but you carried yourself the opposite of Piper, or even his assistant, Ellie. These women were always present in his life, women you tried not to be jealous of, though the ease with which they spoke, the familiarity of their years together ate away at you, knowing you might never reach the level of intimacy you so craved.

Besides, nothing good came of getting close to someone in this day and age, yet you wanted to be—scared of heartbreak, of them being stolen from you too soon, or of being sorely disappointed should they show themselves to be something other than what you thought them to be. There were risks at every turn; you had to decide—would you ever be brave enough to tell him how you felt?

Then, one day, you heard about the love between Ms. Edna and Mr. Zwicky, a robot and a human getting married of all things—it’s what prompted you to stand outside Nick’s door right this very moment, staring long enough at the glowing, heart-shaped outline for it to be burned into your retinas.

The sun was sinking just beyond the wall, Diamond City winding down as its citizens took shelter in their homes or closed up shop—it was thankfully one of your nights off.

You couldn’t get it out of your head, the very idea of a single touch, a single kiss—an affectionate word shared, a smile meant just for you. To make him smile would be the most gratifying thing of all. Too often Valentine looked glum, his thoughts weighing on him, dragging him down along with all the horrors that came with living in a post-apocalyptic society.

To kiss it away, to ensconce him in your embrace—to make him forget he wasn’t human, if only for a few minutes—your heart raced at all the possibilities, all he had to do was let you in.

You assumed a knock was in order, deep, slow breaths doing little to calm your nerves. You had adorned a dress for the occasion, something someone had traded for extra ammo. It was soft blue in color, and in relatively good condition. Ultimately, it was clean, and that was all that mattered to you. Arturo had no use for it, so it had wound up in your possession. Now you would wear it to confess, though you were nervous, a wellspring of anxiety having burgeoned behind your ribs.

“What’s the worst that can happen?” you had asked yourself, fingers curling as you raised your arm. After a few more seconds delay, you made a move to rap against the door, painted red to match the sign out front. There was just one problem—it opened before you could, Ellie’s eyes widening as she jerked a step backward, the woman obviously on her way out.

She said your name, denoting her surprise. You would quickly apologize, already on edge.

“Sorry, Ellie, I—” You paused, averting your eyes to stare at the ground that had suddenly become so interesting. “I was hoping to see Nick,” you bashfully admitted.

The woman quirked a brow, amused for some unknown reason, as if she was in on your little secret just by the way you carried yourself. You attempted to straighten up, offering her a smile to throw her off your scent; you weren’t sure that it was working, though she was kind enough not to comment.

“He stepped out a few hours ago,” she informed you, “but he should be back any minute. You can wait here if you like, but I promised Cathy I’d go have a drink with her.” Ellie gave a halfhearted laugh, “apparently she needs a night out away from her husband.”

“Al-all right,” you managed, supposing Nick was hardly ever “home,” what with being hired for everything under the sun from finding missing cats to tracking down murderers—you only hoped for his safe and swift return.

“I’ll leave the door unlocked,” she offered, holding it open; you timidly stepped forward, Ellie giving you a small wave on her way out.

It was not until that moment you realized you had never stepped foot inside Valentine’s Detective Agency, something you felt ashamed of—maybe he assumed you had no interest in his work. The thought caused a frown to form, but you didn’t want to lose track of why you were here, though finding no harm in taking a look around.

You were respectful, not having it in you to snoop or pry, no matter how many folders lay open or scattered about his desk. There were copies of old newspapers, the latest from Publick Occurrences, rusty filing cabinets, overloaded cardboard boxes, and clipboards with scribbled notes attached.

You spied holotapes of unknown origin, scraps of memorabilia from times long since passed. Items you could only guess at—clues, maybe? Not to mention an assortment of tools, perhaps left over from Nick’s days as a handyman—he’d told you stories, though the idea made you uncomfortable, somehow—the Synth reduced to making household repairs when he was a being of such remarkable intelligence.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, having found yourself sitting at the man’s cluttered workspace. You stared at the painting before you, a tranquil forest scene that had been tarnished by years of grime and dust. A half-smoked cigarette in a nearby ashtray caught your eye; you surprised yourself by picking it up, placing the filter between lips painted a pretty candy apple red, having decorated yourself with a little lipstick for the occasion—you could hardly think of a better time to wear it.

The stale scent of nicotine invaded your nostrils, its taste pungent on your tongue. You struck a match against its book, wanting to experience something that had graced Nick’s synthetic lips, if you couldn’t do so firsthand.

Smoke drifted toward the ceiling, diffusing in loose curls above your head as you exhaled, feeling yourself becoming aroused by your salacious daydreams. You leaned back in Nick’s chair with a faint smile, closing your eyes to more clearly picture his face.

Your free hand groped your own breast, teeth biting down on tender flesh, imagining what it might be like for Valentine’s mechanical fingers to touch you; would it feel cold like metal, or warm like machinery? Sharp like the point of a knife, or smooth like purified silver?

You sighed with longing, chest rising and falling as you stared at the ceiling. You took another drag, finding the burn to be unpleasant as the cigarette reached its end. You bent forward and extinguished it in that same ashtray—Nick would never know the difference—forgetting your lipstick would leave a stain behind.

You normally weren’t one to smoke, feeling slightly buzzed upon standing, riding the tiny high the nicotine gave you as you spied a small space off to your right; you had yet to explore it. There was nothing to keep you out, no locks, no warning signs; you tiptoed forward, as if committing a crime that warranted the use of stealth, peeking around the corner to find a staircase, and a bed.

You glanced upward through the cracks in the floorboards; another mattress was positioned above you, but the personal effects scattered about on the bottom floor let you know this was Nick’s corner, the file folders and spare fedora on his nightstand giving it away.

You snatched the hat, twirling it over in your hands. It was one you hadn’t seen him wear too often, but that was in better condition than the one he sported on the regular, having the bold idea to place it directly on your head.

Of course, there was no mirror to admire yourself in.

You would just have to use your imagination, skimming the rim with two fingers, just like Valentine. You tipped the brim to no one, spinning once to let the full skirt of your pre-war dress swirl around your calves. Feeling pretty, you plopped down gracefully on Nick’s bare bed, wondering if Arturo might have a spare set of sheets you could gift him—did Synths sleep, you wondered? Did Nick lie here awake at night, staring at this same ceiling as you were now?

You sighed, tipping the hat lower, catching onto the unusual scent embedded within its fibers. You pressed your nose against faded leather, inhaling deeply of this strange fragrance, idly twisting bits of clean cotton, not used to wearing something so delicate and fancy; it felt odd, but the texture, the softness of the dress suited you.

This hat smelled like tobacco; ozone; coolant. Like a musty bar mixed with cigarettes. Like metal; like something organic; like wet earth after a radstorm—all things that in combination were uniquely Nick. It pulled a sigh from your lungs, loins aching for the Synth worse than ever, wishing that Valentine might show himself before you chickened out.

You thought to leave the bed; unpredicted were the moves you made to hike your dress up, legs spreading open as you gathered the excess bits of skirt into a fist. You held it to the height of your navel, exposing yourself before you had any real grasp on what you were doing, sliding the palm of your hand past your waist and hips, introducing two fingers to the elastic hem of your panties.

You grinned a little grin, feeling unlike yourself; naughty, for lack of a better word, inching your way beneath its thin layer to brush against your clit. You cooed a little sound, hips gyrating gently as you got comfortable, one of your two fingers gliding down, taking up a measure of your slick.

You massaged that part of you just begging for it, pinpricks of pleasure causing your nerves to tingle as the sensation traveled, extracting a subdued moan from bowed lips. You had the nerve to giggle, entertained in more ways than one, letting Nick’s hat fall flat against your face as you breathed in deeply, working that excitable nub in slow circles, taking your time.

You were just getting started, body reacting in tandem with your touch, exhilarated beyond comprehension at this singular act of bawdy desperation. You were where you always envisioned yourself to be, though now you conjured up something else—what some might call an abject fantasy, one where you explored the body of a robotic man to your heart’s content.

Smooth, hard flesh, or pliable and soft, warm against you, or cold like ice. Exposed wires and eyes stolen from the crown’s of angels, twin halos you would kill a man to see up close. Lips too kissable for one who wasn’t human, tongue and teeth all there, or between your legs. Metallic fingers, dexterous and nimble, the other good for groping all your biologic parts.

You were so close already, wondering if you might in some way be able to please him back. Would he have a cock you could stroke or suck? Could you dig around inside him? Could you find a button, or perhaps a jumble of loose wires to fondle, one that would make his machine-parts whir?

You covered your face more thoroughly with one arm, the fedora hiding you from your own shame. You pushed your hips into the bed as you felt the onset of an orgasm building in the seat of your belly, almost there, almost—

“Say, am I interrupting something?”

You practically screamed, throwing the fedora off with such speed it hit the bed and bounced. You shoved your dress down, embarrassed beyond belief, mortified as much as you were frightened, your heart racing as you pushed up off the Nick’s mattress and ran for the stairs. He had been so quiet—maybe there was a way out of here, up there. You would never live this down.

“Hey, now,” Nick chided, his voice taking on an austere quality that caused a bout of horripilation, the micro hairs on your arms standing at attention; the Synth had locked the fingers of his good hand around your wrist, pulling you back down to his level before pressing your body against the wall of his abode. He tilted his head, studying you with rapt attention and an almost morbid curiosity—he doubted you were some kind of adrenaline junkie, or even an exhibitionist for that matter.

“You think you can just waltz in here and use my bed to pleasure yourself without some kind of explanation? I’ve seen some things in my day, but this takes the cake.”

You could not face him, averting your eyes. His accusatory gaze was powerful, the catalyst for your tears, tiny droplets threatening to roll down your cheeks as you stammered a reply. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean t—”

“—You didn’t mean to masturbate?” Nick questioned, a sardonic tone lacing his old-world, Midwestern accent. “I find that hard to believe.”

There was a pause, Nick’s metallic fingers grasping you by the point of your chin. He gently guided you to face him, tears and all, his voice softening as he realized how sorry you seemed to be, though he was still skeptical.

He called you by your name, addressing you calmly, “at least be honest with me—this how you get your rocks off, or is this some kind of special occasion? If Ellie was here—”

“—she was the only who let me in,” you whispered, Nick so tantalizingly close, yet you were beside yourself in self-abasing horror at your own actions—how could you have been so stupid!? Of course he would find out, sooner or later—he was a private eye, a damn good one! Not to mention this was his place of business, his assistant trusting you well enough to behave yourself. You suddenly felt worse than before; you were sure he had seen everything.

“Huh,” Nick snorted, the gears of his artificial brain beginning to turn toward another direction. “Why the hell would she go and do a thing like that?"

You took a breath and gulped, finally having the courage to look, to get lost in the depths of those parhelic circles he called eyes, wishing to speak, to find the right words, yet it was nearly impossible with the way he had so easily ensnared you.

“Cat got your tongue? Beginning to wonder just how many lights are on upstair—"

You steeled yourself; you kissed him rather than giving an explanation, wondering if this was another thing you would come to regret, though sparks danced behind your eyelids—worried for one moment they might be real, some side effect of physical contact—Nick forcing you off to where your back was returned to its spot against his bedroom wall.

They had been warm; his lips were warm.

“Oh, I get it now. You came here thinking you’d shoot your shot, but when I wasn’t home you got carried away in some sick fantasy, is that it? Decided to rub one out,” he derided, laying your sins out before you so coldly that your lip trembled; you struggled to break free.

“Valentine, please—"

“Could have just waited for me,” he offered; you froze with bated breath, his words having taken an unexpected turn—could he be serious, or was he simply toying with you as punishment?

“Gal like you isn’t exactly hard on the eyes…”

“You’re not upset?” you asked breathily, chest heaving, wide, round eyes searching his for confirmation.

“Upset you thought you could get away with this,” he muttered, brushing his mouth against yours, Nick’s skeletal hand holding your chin steady. Never in your wildest dreams did you imagine that he would indulge you, feeling yourself melt against the solid brick of his Diamond City home. “Not exactly a secret you fancy me; can read it all over your face, just never thought you’d have the guts to do a thing like this.”

“I couldn’t help it,” you pleaded, your own hand lifting, exploring the texture of his tattered coat, rising higher to caress the portion of his flesh still intact just below the fissure that extended beyond the brim of his hat. “Then why didn’t you say something? I only meant to tell you how you make me feel,” you whispered, eagerly returning that kiss, introducing your wet human tongue to his.

“How’s that?” he asked, ignoring the first part of your question—he wasn’t about to tell you you’d have to make the first move, he didn’t have to—his inviolate hand sliding down the dip in your waist to rest against your hip. He gave it a squeeze, aware of his own strength, applying just enough pressure to excite you, no more, no less.

“Ravenous,” you exclaimed, hiking your leg, encircling him to draw in close like you were playing the part of some wily seductress in a pre-war film. You emitted a dulcet moan, digits inching across the back of his head, taking the time to kiss Valentine more deeply in your lust.

Nick was quick, supporting your ass in his firm grip, securing your leg as he pressed his inorganic frame against yours that was supple and pliant; he met your hunger head on. “Good thing I know a trick or two.”

You shivered with anticipation, despite the Synth being almost hot to the touch. Silicone fingers disappeared up your long, flowing skirt, but only after he was sure you were both comfortably entangled.

Valentine kissed a question up the side of your neck toward lipstick-laden lips. “You wear this for me?” he asked, motioning his head toward your bartered dress.

“Y-yes,” you stammered, grasping his tie, feeding your words directly into his smug mouth. “Wanted to look pretty for you,” you conceded.

“Only thing more lovely than a bird in blue is a woman who wears her confidence like a second skin. Tell me you didn’t walk in here thinkin’ you could pull me, or are you just a nightingale pretending to be a peacock, flaunting your feathers, yet too afraid to show me your true colors?”

You were floored; you could not answer, having hoped that you could sway him, but doubting your plan from the get-go. You dare not tell him, too shy to admit your shortcomings, and too proud to acknowledge he had hit the nail on the head. Instead, you stared unabashedly, even as your cheeks burned, swallowing down the knot in your throat as you remained transfixed on eyes that glowed like candles in the dark.

“Too bad,” Valentine teased, rousing you from your stupor by way of calculated movements beneath your dress, “Suppose I’ll have to find out the hard way.”

Your breath hitched as the tips of faux fingers thoughtfully guided your panties to one side, Valentine expertly trailing his forefinger through your excess to the top of your slit. The Synth grazed the swollen sheath of glands pulsating adamantly between your legs, finding his rhythm, administering just enough friction to get a rise out of you, as intended.

“Nick,” you gasped, the fingers of one hand still cinched around his tie as the fingers of the other clawed into false flesh. He slid back down, following that happy little trail of slickness, its viscosity registering as wet against microscopic sensors, Nick’s index finger delving into something so moist, so soft.

“Speak to me, sweetheart. Tell me how long you’ve dreamt of this; tell me this isn’t some dime-store hookup you’re using to scratch an itch; tell me this means somethin’, I dare you,” he growled darkly into your ear.

You could only whimper as he worked you, aiming for the seat of your pleasure, Nick’s thumb running concentric circles around your turgid clit in perfect unison with that part of him that was introducing pressure to your G-spot. You had the gall to rock your hips, balancing like a flamingo on one leg, though he held you close between himself and the wall, not once allowing you to think you might stumble and fall.

“Always think of you, where you are, what you’re up to,” you breathed. “Never leave my mind.”

“What else?” he asked, brazenly steeping another finger, your soaked cunt riding both together as you shamelessly kept undulating your pelvic arch, already so near to climax.

“Dreamt of kissing you, making love to you. Wanted to know what touching you might feel like, warm, co-cold,” you moaned. “If you could ever want me back, if y-you knew just how much I adore you, how much I wish to be the one to make you smile…”

“Is that right?” Nick titillated you toward orgasm without any extra effort, feeling yourself spill out all over him as you vocalized to the heavens, Valentine not relenting until you were spent. Then, he retracted as simple as that, lifting you up, the Synth forcing you to wrap that other leg around him in order to carry you the few feet between him and the bed.

“And did you ever think of what you’d do if I didn’t have the parts?” he began, tossing you carefully onto the mattress. You watched in longing as he shucked his trench off for it to slide down the length of his arms, gathering in a pile at his feet.

“Fuck. It wouldn’t matter,” you insisted, sitting up on the palms of your hands. “It wouldn’t matter,” you repeated more urgently, adjusting to crawl forward, unable to keep yourself from him now that you had a taste.

“And what you’d do if I didn’t reciprocate?” The hat was next, tossed haphazardly off to the side.

You gaped at him, unable to come up with a satisfactory response, scouring his pleasing form from head to toe with your eyes, admiring his shoulder holster, his weapon of choice, and the suspenders that dug into his shoulders.

“I’m more machine than man; typically… disappointing to dames like you. But I’ve got nothing to hide, and I mean that literally,” he quipped, loosening and discarding his tie. What he did next surprised you, Valentine placing one knee on the bed. He pushed you backward, fitting himself right between your thighs.

“Never stopped me before,” he muttered, coercing you to lie back. In the blink of an eye, he had slipped your panties down and off, flipping the tail end of your skirt up and over your lap, exposing the soft mound between your legs.

“It’s like riding a bicycle,” he commented; how to go down on a beautiful woman was not something he would soon forget, no matter he wasn’t in the body he was born with.

You gasped before settling into a melodious moan as he swiped his tongue across your sensitive bud, Nick noticing you were tuned to the key of C, a low-frequency tonal sound that made his robotic brain buzz with something akin to happiness.

Before you knew it, he had buried himself, embedding his articulate tongue in your tepid core. Responsive biosensors did their job of transmitting physiological data concerning the presence of chemical compounds that happened to be coming into contact with his face; the detective was well aware of what that meant without having to overthink it, appreciative of the way you writhed against the bed.

“Valentine,” you mewled, arm reaching, fingers stretching to caress a hinged jaw made of filaments and wires, more unbidden tears finding their way to your eyes.

“Kiss me,” you implored, exploring the sharp contours of his inhumane face, the actuate planes and angles, the rough textures, the smooth remnants, the electrical undercurrent that hummed beneath the surface of his pseudo-flesh, causing you to cry out as he obliged, but not in the way you had expected.

Nick lapped at your cunt like it was a second mouth, attentive to every little move your body made as it wriggled and quivered, spasming with each long lick. He showed no mercy, relentlessly fucking you with his spongy tongue at a slow and steady pace, brushing the back of an alloyed finger along the cut where hip met thigh.

“Please,” you tried again, though in your heart of hearts you did not want him to stop. He refocused on your clit, being oh-so careful as he slid a single metallic digit into your wet pith, tensile fibers remaining elongated so as not to maim and injure, but to experiment, your pelvic muscles clenching around him as he began to suck.

“I can’t,” you professed, unable to elaborate, to stop your mounting orgasm. Your back arched as your hips bucked upward to meet his all too talented mouth, forcing a sound out of you that was reminiscent of pain but indicative of pleasure as you came a second time that night, Nick withdrawing his hand, his carbon-ferrous finger, pulling back to look you in the eye.

“Sweetheart, did I—”

Valentine flexed his unsheathed digits, composed of bare metal, his forefinger saturated and glistening, yet he was worried. His painted brows quirked upward as he rose to meet your face, his palm fitting itself around the curve of your waist, as gentle as can be.

He stared into your soul with those penetrative, aureate eyes, wishing you hadn’t of done that. Wishing he hadn’t of done that—it had been just plain ignorant on his part, but he didn’t figure you’d go and move so suddenly. And truth be told, you were beautiful, a thing too good to pass up. He wasn’t exactly a hot commodity these days, though a part of him—the inhuman part—didn’t think he was worth it.

Still, it was a difficult thing to just give up when he had urges, needs, wants, desires—or at least he thought he did. It was hard to tell where the real Nick began and Synth Nick ended, but for now he was experiencing an emotion that was real enough to give him pause.

“Are you all right?” he asked softly, his mood turning toward something serious, Valentine wondering if he had caused anything irreparable. He didn’t think he could live with himself if he’d gone and hurt an innocent—especially like this—despite the fact he wasn’t exactly alive to begin with.

You did not answer, studying the change in his demeanor, observing as his tough guy persona disappeared to be replaced by the sweet, caring man you had grown to cherish over the past few months.

He was two sides of the same coin, but you had known that going in, purposefully trailing your fingers across denuded metal toward a gathering of thick red wires, caressing the coils between the gap in his neck with the utmost tenderness.

“I’ve never been better,” you promised, appraising the look of quiet bliss that overtook him, realizing this sort of thing might be his little secret—he came back to himself just in time to put a halt to your investigation, the Synth oddly silent as he searched for something deep within your eyes.

“But I want to make you feel good,” you offered with a genuine pout, but Nick held fast to your wrist, going back to how this whole game had started. His apprehension was clear, the detective reading like an overdue library book. You couldn’t help but feel a little sad, a little disappointed, instead climbing onto his lap, draping yourself over his sound thighs.

“I don’t let just anyone poke around inside me—what makes you think you’ll make the cut?” he asked, slipping a stray bit of hair behind your ear in a gesture so human it made your heart ache.

“I’m not here to hurt you, Nick.” It was the truth.

He’d redirect you for now, but you couldn’t blame him— you were surprised that you had even gotten this far.

“I’ve got a better idea,” he replied. “Tell me something about yourself. What do I need to know besides exactly how you taste?”

You smiled, assuming that one day he might trust you well enough to return the favor.

Baby steps. You could be patient. The only thing that mattered was that at that moment, you had him to yourself.

“I once killed a Yao guai with my bear hands,” you joked, taking the time to notice just how many kiss marks you had left all over him—time to add one more, just to play it safe.

“There they are.”

“What?”

“Your true colors.”

Your lips spread into a mischievous grin.

“On second thought, I think I’m going to need a drink for this.”

At least he hadn’t kicked you out yet.

“That’s fair,” you said.

#Nick Valentine #Nick Valentine x Reader #Nick Valentine x Fem Reader #Fallout 4 #Fo4 #My writing #Fallout smut #Fanfiction #x reader #x you #No this is not a sole survivor fic

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stardusted-hearts · 1 year ago

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Purple...? Oh no!

Shadow's hands were on his face in an instant, covering the off-color blush that definitely wasn't there and he wasn't hiding anything! And it also totally wasn't worse now that Volt had 'seen' it, because there was nothing to see.

"You- you most certainly will not!" Shadow turned to walk away. Quickly. Still covering his cheeks. "Leave me alone!"

"Purple huh." Even if he could have played innocent, Volt knew he wouldn't have gotten away with it. So he just playful shrugged his shoulders, tail wiggling behind him when he finally met crimson eyes.

"Not a bad look for ya. Should see if I can do it more of'en."

#familylightfox #+ harmonic voltage +#-= event horizon =-#[ the Drama horizon... ]

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buldakdrama · 1 year ago

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5 must watch kdramas if you are in search of something unique

When it comes to Kdramas, you can expect a number of varieties in the plots. Some are plain rom-com, while others focus more on crime and thriller, some are painting ever-existing social issues in front of the audiences, while others are taking them to a trip of fantasia. All in all, you can get whatever you want here.

However, it can get quite monotonous after a while. Since there are now a lot of rom-coms based on Boss-employee relationships or fantasy dramas based on non-human leads falling in love with the human leads, nothing is hard to predict. In this scenario, you must crave to watch something that has a refreshment to offer. Something that is not so predictable and leaves you hooked on the drama for good. And if you are looking for something just like this, then you are at the right place because I am about to suggest 5 must watch kdramas if you are looking for something unique. So, let’s get into it.

1. Reborn Rich

Trust me when I say Reborn Rich is nothing like the dramas we are used to watching even if it has that chaebol backdrop. This Song Joong Ki starrer is based on the revenge of an employee, who gets falsely accused and killed by his employers. Just on the moment he dies, he is reborn as the youngest son of the same employers but this time he goes back in time and starts from the start. Jin Do Jun now carefully plans his revenge as he claims his inheritance over the entire conglomerate. The twists and turns of the drama are really intriguing. In a moment Jin Do Jun is winning in the rat race and the next moment he is being interrogated by his girlfriend herself. But what is even more intriguing, is the ending of the drama! That unpredictable ending will keep you in a chokehold until you can’t comprehend what you have just watched. Additionally, if you have interest in business and finance then this one is a must watch for you.

2. Celebrity

Do you crave to have the limelight upon you? If yes, then let me tell you it comes with a caution. You might have to sacrifice more than what you can gain and all of it is pictured perfectly in Celebrity. This drama is the story of Seo A Ri, who accidentally becomes an e-celeb and completely despises what it has to offer. But soon she discovers the brighter side of the glam life she is offered and makes the best out of it, nonetheless, soon she finds herself succumbing to the darkness once she used to hate. This drama shows the downside of having an overly luxurious life and being addicted to social media popularity, which ends up costing A Ri’s life. But there is more to unfold. Celebrity is certainly intriguing but Park Gyu Young’s praise-worthy performance and the high-voltage cameos make it even better. If you want to watch a bad-ass female lead and a lot of unpredictable cliff-hangers then this drama is certainly a must watch for you.

3. Remarriages and Desires

From the title the drama may sound to be one of the typical kdramas dealing with melodramatic plot but no, it’s not. Remarriages and Desires have a much heavier plot than you might assume. This one again is a revenge drama, but this time more on a domestic level. The drama focuses on a matchmaking agency called Rex, which signs up some of the wealthiest personalities of South Korea in order to match them up with their better halves. Seo Hye Seung’s not-so-simple life gets even more complicated when her mother enrolls her in as one of the members of Rex. However, she takes the chance of remarriage upon her unexpected encounter with Jin Yoo Hee, played by Jung Yoo JIn, there. Jin Yoo Hee is the person with whom Hye Seung’s ex cum late husband cheated her on and opted for a divorce. There begins the petty game of revenge and things get more and more intriguing by the end of the drama. However, only 8 episodes don’t do justice to the intriguing plot that it has. Nevertheless, this is one of the best dramas you can binge watch within a span of 24 hours.

4. W - Two Worlds

W is one of the most underrated suspense thrillers to ever be made, you can’t convince me otherwise. The plot of this drama focuses on two parallel words that are going on side by side and integrated by a door through a web novel. While Kang Chul, played by Lee Jong Suk, thinks he is pretty much real, Oh Yeon Joo’s sudden appearance in his life reveals that he is nothing but a character of a manga written by Yeon Joo’s father. Even though the backdrop of the drama hints at a rich guy falling for a random girl trope, it has a lot to offer. Your mind will go numb with all the predictions by the end. With an unexpected ending, an unexpected villain and an unexpected story development it becomes one of the must watches when you look for something unique.

5. Extraordinary You

Now this might seem to be an unhinged suggestion but wait, this is different. Extraordinary You is not a typical highschool romance as it seems it be, there are more. The drama is set within a comic novel. Yes, you read it right, within a comic novel, where all the characters are highschoolers and totally unaware of the fact that they are not even real. Until one day Eun Dan Oh, played by Kim Hye Yoon, finds out the truth. She then tries to change her pre-written fate at all cost as she doesn’t want to die at an early age. Changing her fate becomes even easier when she meets Haru, played by Rowoon. But things are not at all easy as it seems. The drama has a very unique plot indeed but it also has massive cringe alerts. So, please proceed with caution if you are not into sweet talks and PDA. Nevertheless, the unpredictable ending of the drama makes it a good addition when you want to watch something unique.

So what are you waiting for, get your spicy chicken ready and start binge watching these dramas if you have not already. I will see you in another post, another day.

-- Admin Nika

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voltageapps · 1 year ago

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November 17 is the birthday of Oushiro Kurogane from Voltage drama CD "Neko Cafe Danshi" 🐈

Happy belated birthday Oushiro!

#voltageinc #voltage inc #voltage otome #otome romance #otome #otome cd #otome drama cd #neko cafe danshi #oushiro kurogane #birthday

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owlobservation · 3 months ago

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Boujaku no Charisma (Arrogant Charisma) Lyrics and English Translation

Bluelock Season 2 Opening by UNISON SQUARE GARDEN

Listen the song on:

Youtube (tba)

Spotify

Apple Music

Disclaimer: English translation by us. Apologize in advance if there's any mistake. If the official english translation comes out (usually through the MV), we will replace it immediately!

-Lyrics-

Hey guys, what's up?

能動的な selfish touch

快楽を食って生きている君子危うくて接近戦

隠せない voltage

静観してるのが多分普通だから

それも幸せなんでしょう

一蹴即発のエクスタシー

降りられない孤独

もういいよって道化が嗤い出す

そうかじゃあもう命は終わりか?･･･and going!

心眼に満ちた独断でダルい偏見はもう塵と化す

今ちょうどいいとこなんだからほら

邪魔すんじゃねえよ

激しく鳴ってる心臓に沿っていく

あてのないルートを選び出しながら

誰かが見落していたドラマの穴鮮やかに

どこまでものめり込めお前が挑んだゲームだ

炎が猛るような眼差しがチケットだ

生ぬるくて安い同情にはもう飽き飽きしてんだ

常識のその向こうまで傍若のカリスマ

カオスを極める敵はどこだ?陸海空?

それとも自分の中か?

孫子崩れ去る現代戦ふさわしき波乱

デスバレーさながら命を賭し

残ったやつを希望と呼べ

一蹴即発のエクスタシー

やめられないこれだけは

どうして無駄な血が流れる?

鬱陶しけりゃ無視すればいいのに･･･and going!

遠慮を促す抑圧がこの世界を更にダメにする

今ちょうどいいとこなんだからほら

邪魔すんじゃねえよ

青に染まってく答えをずっと待ってる

世界を変えるのさこれが最終定理だ

わかんないならいっそ弾いてくれわかんないままでいいさ

局所的正義で悪いかよ反逆を続けろ

息が詰まるほど連なる選択よ、美しくあれ

描けたなら証になるだろうイメージしろ

誰も追いつけはしない

激しく鳴ってる心臓に沿っていく

あてのないルートを選び出しながら

誰かが見落していたドラマの穴鮮やかに

どこまでものめり込めお前が挑んだゲームだ

炎が猛るような眼差しがチケットだ

生ぬるくて安い同情にはもう飽き飽きしてんだ

常識のその向こうまで傍若のカリスマ

ちょうどいいとこなんだからほら

邪魔すんじゃねえよ

-Romaji-

Hey guys, what's up?

Noudoutekina selfish touch

Kairaku o kutte ikite iru kunshi ayaukute sekkinsen

Kakusenai voltage

Seikan shiteru no ga tabun futsuu dakara

Sore mo shiawase nan deshou

Isshuu sokuhatsu no ekusutashii

Orirarenai kodoku

Mou ii yo tte douke ga warai dasu

Sou ka jaa mou inochi wa owari ka?... and going!

Shingan ni michita dokudan de darui henken wa mou chiri to kasu

Ima choudo ii toko nandakara hora

Jama sun janee yo

Hageshiku natteru shinzou ni sotte iku

Ate no nai ruuto o erabidashi nagara

Dareka ga miotoshiteita dorama no ana azayaka ni

Doko made mo nomerikome omae ga idonda geemu da

Honou ga takeru you na manazashi ga chiketto da

Namanurukute yasui doujou ni wa mou akiaki shiten da

Joushiki no sono mukou made boujaku no karisuma

Kaosu o kiwameru teki wa dokoda? Riku kai kuu?

Sore tomo jibun no naka ka?

Son Shi kuzuresaru gendaisen fusawashiki haran

Desu Baree sanagara inochi o toshi

Nokotta yatsu o kibou to yobe

Isshuu sokuhatsu no ekusutashii

Yame rarenai kore dake wa

Doushite mudana chi ga nagareru?

Uttoushikerya mushi sureba ii no ni... and going!

Enryo o unagasu yokuatsu ga kono sekai o sarani dame ni suru

Ima choudo ii toko nandakara hora

Jama sun janee yo

Ao ni somatteku kotae o zutto matteru

Sekai o kaeru no sa kore ga saishuu teiri da

Wakan'nainara isso hajiite kure wakan'nai mamade ii sa

Kyokushoteki seigi de warui ka yo hangyaku o tsudzukero

Iki ga tsumaru hodo tsuranaru sentaku yo, utsukushiku are

Egaketa nara akashi ni naru darou imeeji shiro

Daremo oitsuke wa shinai

Hageshiku natteru shinzou ni sotte iku

Ate no nai ruuto o erabidashi nagara

Dareka ga miotoshiteita dorama no ana azayaka ni

Doko made mo nomerikome omae ga idonda geemu da

Honou ga takeru you na manazashi ga chiketto da

Namanurukute yasui doujou ni wa mou akiaki shiten da

Joushiki no sono mukou made boujaku no karisuma

Choudo ii toko nandakara hora

Jama sun janee yo

-English Translation-

Hey guys, what's up?

An active selfish touch

Living off pleasure, close combat with the best

Can't hide this voltage

Maybe it's normal to just watch quietly

I guess it's happiness too, right?

Ecstasy that kicks immediately

Loneliness you can't escape

"That's enough" the clown starts laughing

I see, is this the end of my life?... and going!

With my own heart's decision, that dull prejudice turns to dust

Now I'm in the right place, so hey

Don't get in my way

Following my heart that's beating wildly

I'm choosing the route with no destination

Filling the gap in the drama that someone overlooked

Immerse yourself to the fullest, this is the game you challenged

The fiery eyes are your ticket

I'm sick of lukewarm and cheap sympathy

An Arrogant Charisma that goes beyond common sense

Where is the enemy of chaos? On land, sea, air?

Or is it within myself?

In the turmoil of chaos, modern warfare collapsing like Sun Tzu's teaching

Risk your life like Death Valley

And call what remains 'hope'

Ecstasy that kicks immediately

I just can't stop doing this

Why do you shed unnecessary blood?

If it's annoying, you can just ignore it... and going!

Suppression that encourages restrain will ruin this world even more

Now I'm in the right place, so hey

Don't get in my way

I've been waiting for the answer dyed in blue

This is the final theorem that will change the world

If you don't understand, just shrug it off, It's okay not to understand

Is it wrong to follow local justice? Keep up the rebellion

These suffocating choices, let them be beautiful

If you can picture it, that image will be the proof

No one will be able to catch up

Following my heart that's beating wildly

I'm choosing the route with no destination

Filling the gap in the drama that someone overlooked

Immerse yourself as far as you can, this is the game you challenged

The fiery eyes are your ticket

I'm sick of lukewarm and cheap sympathy

An Arrogant Charisma that goes beyond common sense

I'm in the right place, so hey

Don't get in my way

#song translation #translation

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nightingale2004 · 9 months ago

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Am I the only one who wishes the shows and movies space werewolves, sing it loud, raise the roof, sing it louder, and voltage from Liv and Maddie were real shows?

I can't be the only one

I would kill to see those kinds of shows. I would be like Joey and Parker and totally fangirling over those shows SOOOOO HARD.

Also, I would not hate it if there was a drama called Linda and Heather.

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lady-october · 8 months ago

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Pairing : Oli Sykes x Female Assistant Genre : Romance, Smut (18+ Only) Previous Chapters : 01-16 On Ao3

Story Content : 18+, Smut, Drama, Choking, Power dynamics, Romance, Sadism/Masochism, Dom/Sub, Mentions of addiction & self harm, Degradation, Praise kink, Exhibitionism, Breath play, Dirty talk.

Summary :

“Don’t you see what a dangerous game you’re playing? Why did you have to look so fucking delicious tonight, I couldn’t stop undressing you in my mind, thinking of all the twisted things I want to do to you.” She had only worked on the touring team for three weeks, but her mind had been hijacked by dirty thoughts of a man she barely even talked to. Sure, he was very attractive, but were there other reasons she was so uncontrollably drawn to him? This is a filthy story of pain, self discovery, and love.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Chapter 17: Oh, give me a break

Chapter title is lyrics from "Ludens"

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

I can’t believe I told him I have feelings for him, just one day after realising I even have them at all.

What the hell am I doing?

I was leaning against the door I’d just shut behind me, still holding the handle after leaving Oli in his dressing room, wearing one of his oversized shirts turned inside out to make it less obvious it belonged to him, clutching my cum stained silk dress, balled up in my other hand.

I wasn’t entirely sure how I’d ended up agreeing to two dates, with two different men, when I’d just been questioning whether I should be dating at all within the near future.

Yet here I was, drowning in dates.

Pushing off the door I began wandering down the corridor towards my dressing room, my mind racing with thoughts.

Tonight had been eye opening in many ways. Spending so much time with Oli had been nothing short of incredible, making me want more time with him. So, despite my fears, it had been hard to turn down another opportunity to get to know him better.

But Mat?

Sure I hadn’t actually talked to Mat about a date yet, but considering how concerned Oli was about him, I might as well spend some time with him to settle Oli’s worries. If nothing else it was an opportunity to solidify a friendship I would very much like to have in the future.

Because while Mat was incredibly charming, it was honestly hard to place him in a sexual setting. There were just no real sparks between us.

Unlike like with Oli, where things were so electric they should come with a high voltage warning.

When I reached what I thought was my dressing room, I mindlessly opened the door, not stopping to think that maybe I should be a bit more cautious since all these doors look the same.

Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw behind the door that most certainly did not belong to my dressing room.

Mat was sprawled on a large arm chair across the room, leaned back with his plaid shirt open to reveal a hairy chest that was covered in a decent amount of ink work, trousers around his ankles and his hand wrapped around his cock, stroking it slowly with his head leaned back in ecstasy right before cum started shooting in long shots across his stomach. His hand squeezed the armrest, making the veins on his arm pop as the muscles there tensed where his sleeves were rolled up.

I was completely stunned, my heart got stuck in my throat but also somehow managed to travel down to my pussy within milliseconds.

More cum shot out, going a bit further this time, hitting his chest, eliciting a moan from him – low and guttural as his head came back up. He must not have heard me when I opened the door as he appeared surprised to see me – yet his orgasm continued, clearly too all-consuming to stop what he was doing despite my interruption, so the surprise quickly glazed over with a hungry, piercing stare that threatened to bring me to my knees if I didn’t focus.

“Alice,” He breathed as more cum flowed onto him, the surprise creeping slowly back into his features, snapping me out of my stunned state.

“Fuck– Wait!” Is all I heard as I instantly slammed the door shut and began sprinting down the corridor.

So much for not being able to place him in a sexual setting.

How was I ever supposed to get that image out of my head?

I heard the door open, so I desperately darted my eyes around to find my own dressing room, but I was thrown off, turned around, and uncontrollably turned on.

“Alice, wait!” His words echoed down the entire length of the corridor.

I started randomly opening doors hoping one of them would magically lead to my dressing room, but I heard his footsteps getting close, so I begged the universe that the next door would be the right one.

It was not.

I shut the door, about to dash to the next one, when a warm hand suddenly appeared on my wrist. I froze in place for two reasons; the wrist in question was connected to my hand clutching the cum stained dress, and while I should be worrying about him seeing the dress – seeing the very obvious stains and putting the puzzle pieces together – I could only seem to focus on the fact that the warm hand on my wrist had just been wrapped around Mat’s hard cock.

I swallowed.

“Alice, I’m so sorry, I thought I’d locked the damn thing.”

His words made me realise my eyes had been transfixed on his hand, so I looked away, only to take in all the other extremely distracting things going on; such as the still hard cock straining against his zipped up but unbuckled jeans, the bare chest that had just been covered in cum.

How did he have time to wipe it all off?

And finally his flushed face, and green eyes that caused me to inhale sharply as they met mine.

He looked so worried, yet some of the same energy from the piercing stare he gave me during his orgasm was still lingering there.

“N-no, I’m sorry, I should have knocked, I thought– I thought it w-was my room.” I felt myself starting to ramble, and I would probably have gone on for a lot longer if he hadn’t cut me off.

“None of that, it was completely my fault.” He let go of my wrist before he continued, and I tucked my hand behind my back, attempting to hide the dress.

“Can we just pretend this never happened? I really don’t want this to ruin anything between us.” I could hear him speaking to me, but I’d gotten distracted by the slight movement on his chest.

I looked down to see a single drop of cum he must have missed when cleaning up in a hurry, which was now slowly running down his chest, lacing through the hair there.

While deeply distracted, my mind had somehow still managed to process what he was asking of me – it just took a bit longer than usual.

“Sure, we can do that.” I breathed, clearly flustered, clearly turned on. Panicked, I darted my eyes back to his to see if he’d noticed my state, and he very clearly had. His stare had turned dark and dirty, and I felt the air thicken with sexual tension.

But I couldn’t go down this path – couldn’t even begin to process this path, so I straightened, cleared my throat and spoke as collected as I could, “But don’t worry, we’re fine.” My words came flat, which I was very happy about, as it caused Mat to straighten as well.

“Good.” He returned, just as flatly, making it clear we’d both agreed to not let the tension build any further. He took a deep breath, releasing even more tension, “Are you alright by the way? You never came back tonight.”

Crap.

I hadn’t crafted a lie yet for why I ran after Oli tonight instead of spending time with Mat as planned, so I opened my mouth and hoped I could come up with something on the spot.

“I didn’t mean to disappear for so long. I just remembered, I–”

Thankfully he cut me off again, cause I had nothing.

“No need to explain love, as long as you’re okay, yeah?” While he still had cum running down his chest, his expression had thankfully returned to the usual warm smile that so often played on his lips.

I smiled back at him, glad that he was so understanding and patient with me.

“I’m alright.” I said softly, realising for the first time how warm my face was – I must have been blushing deeply this entire interaction.

Suddenly Mat leaned back some, appearing nervous, “This is probably the worst possible time to do this, but I was gonna ask if you wanted to go to the lake near the hotel tomorrow afternoon with me.” He didn’t give me a chance to respond before it was his turn to ramble, “Oh, and you don’t have to decide now– think about it, and we’ll talk tomorrow– or you could–”

So it was my turn to cut him off, “I’d like that.” I said without thinking, knowing I’d already mentally agreed to a date with him.

Somewhere in the back of my mind it occurred to me that maybe I should have taken a bit longer to decide considering recent events.

The surprise was back in his eyes, “Oh, okay, great!” He exclaimed with a massive smile, “I think you’ll enjoy it – one hell of a view.”

I’m sure it was, yet the only view in my head at the moment consisted of his piercing eyes on me as he was coming all over himself.

I hadn’t realised it, but my gaze had wandered down to his crotch again.

He was still hard.

As soon as I caught myself I snapped my eyes back to his, which were suddenly swimming with lust again – having noticed what I was doing, how I was looking at him.

“I’ll let you go.” He said low and distant, clearly restraining himself.

I nodded shakily, “Okay.”

Slipping out of his close proximity, I began walking down the corridor, trying to collect myself.

“Alice?”

I stopped and looked back at him, confused.

“Your dressing room’s that way.” He pointed the opposite direction I was heading.

Kicking myself mentally, I threw him a sheepish smile, turned around and walked past him again.

My mind was racing so fast I thought it was going to explode, I wasn’t even aware someone could be this utterly confused.

All I could do was focus on getting my things and heading to bed.

As I was getting into my bunk I noticed Oli’s curtain was already shut, in fact, only his and Liam’s were.

I paused for a long moment, considering joining him since everyone here already knew about us, but the thought of facing him after what just happened with Mat made me nauseous, so I crawled into my own bunk and closed the curtain behind me.

Picking up my phone, I stared at our chat history, considering how to tell him – if I should tell him.

No, I knew I had to tell him what happened; I couldn’t bear the thought of starting anything with Oli while hiding the fact that I’d seen one of his best friends having an orgasm.

Is that what I was doing, starting something with Oli?

The all-too familiar edge of panic began scraping along my spine at the thought, causing me to put away my phone.

I felt hopelessly lost in unknown territory, bone chilling uncertainty lurking around every corner; every unexpected bump in the road, every new and all-too exciting surprise leaving me jarred and horrified over and over again.

I sighed deeply.

Despite how terrified I was, all I wanted to do right now was entangle my limbs with Oli’s, cuddle up close, and fall asleep in his arms as I listened to his steady heart beat.

At some point my daydreaming must have turned to actual dreams, because before I knew it Liam’s alarm was blaring again.

I’m not sure how he’d managed to find such an annoyingly high pitched, screeching sound for his alarm, but it sure was effective at waking you up.

However, I wasn’t ready to get up yet. I wanted to stay in my bunk for at least five minutes, giving the others some time to get dressed and get out of here so I wouldn’t have to face both Oli and Mat at the same time.

After hearing multiple steps on the stairs followed by distant voices, I decided it was a good time to get up.

It was not.

In fact, I couldn’t have picked a worse time to pull back the curtain.

Mat was standing in the aisle, his bulge showing through his boxers, framed by jeans that were pulled up but still unzipped. He was mid slipping a shirt over his head, but his eyes locked with mine as soon as his head popped through the neck hole, shooting me an intimate, flirty smile that sent a shiver down my spine.

I looked away immediately.

But without meaning to, my gaze had landed on Oli.

He was still laying in his bunk with the curtain pulled back, revealing nearly all of his ink covered skin besides what was hidden under his boxes – which were riding dangerously low and barely concealing what looked like the late stages of fading morning wood. He ran his hands through his hair, causing all his muscles to move beautifully, perversely, before he sat up, his sleepy hazel eyes meeting mine with a lazy, absolutely filthy smile as his messy locks fell back over his face.

I swallowed, heat spreading through me, knowing exactly how much trouble I was in, before I grabbed for whatever clothes I could find and disappeared downstairs into the bathroom.

Thankfully the utter chaos of work took over as soon as I was done getting ready, with Liam ordering me to do things left, right, and centre – not giving me much time to either think about or interact with the men that I had dates with later today.

Until it was time to set off.

We were only about an hour away from the next venue, which is where we’d park the bus with all the equipment, taking a rented van to the famous hotel that I’d grown quite curious about, having heard nothing but stories of beautiful scenery, perfect rooms, and incredible food, making me wonder if the place really was as magical as everyone made it out to be.

While walking towards the tour bus I pulled out my phone, daring to check my messages for the first time today.

There were three unread messages from Oli, all sent within the last forty minutes.

“Oli: Alright love, told the lads I’m taking you on a lil adventure tonight.”

“Oli: Didn’t know Mat already asked you out tho, did you run into him last night?”

“Oli: Wear some underwear when you’re with him.”

Not a question, but an order.

I considered responding before crossing the parking lot, but a stressed Liam spotted me, waving me towards the bus.

“Get a move on, love! I want to be done with this bloody morning!” He yelled before disappearing through the bus door.

I couldn’t blame him, no one was looking forward to this hotel more than him considering how tired he was from non stop driving. This would be our longest stay in any one place since the tour started, with it consisting of three entire nights, giving him a rather long break from the bus.

As soon as I stepped on the bus the door closed behind me and Liam set off, threatening to send me flying to the floor, but I held onto the interior as I clumsily made my way to the seating area.

“Hiya love, come have a seat.” I heard Oli say before a familiar hand appeared in front of me, offering to help me get seated as Liam rushed to get us onto the motorway.

I looked up to see Oli smiling sweetly at me, a similar softness to his expression from last night after I’d all-too impulsively confessed I have feelings for him, causing butterflies to suddenly flutter in my stomach.

“Thanks.” I responded before I slipped my hand into his. I couldn’t help but dart my eyes around the bus to see who was watching us with my hand in his, as it somehow felt incredibly intimate and almost wrong to do this in front of everyone, regardless of how innocent of a gesture it actually was.

Only Lee and Mat were downstairs, and while Lee didn’t pay us any mind, Mat was sitting on the sofa across from us, watching us, appearing quite tense as Oli pulled me in front of him.

For a moment I felt as if I was being guided towards him, to sit in his lap, bringing me close to a panicked state, but thankfully he kept guiding me to the seat after his – next to him.

As soon as I got into my seat Oli’s hand slipped away to immediately grab for a notebook and pen he’d tucked between himself and the seat, scribbling words down that I couldn’t quite read from this angle.

“Alice, do you like risotto? They make an incredible one at the hotel, thought I’d bring some for the lake today.”

My eyes snapped to Mat who had asked me the question, but before I got a chance to respond Oli spoke up next to me.

“Don’t know, but she likes sushi.” He muttered, clearly too focused on whatever he was writing to realise he’d spoken on my behalf. As soon as he’d said it, he looked up from his notebook, wide-eyed, realising what he’d done, “I think anyway– was that right, Alice?”

“Oh, I love sushi!” Mat said cheerfully, but his chipper expression quickly turned to a frown, “But I don’t think they make that there.”

“I like both.” I responded quietly, wanting the incredibly awkward moment to come to an end as soon as possible.

“Great.” Mat gave me a very thoughtful, almost apologetic smile, as if he could tell how uncomfortable I was.

A horrible silence fell, causing Oli to return to his writing.

I considered picking up my phone, to respond to Oli’s texts, but Mat spoke up before I could gather my thoughts on what to type.

“I could really use some more caffeine, you alright to whip up a coffee, love?”

His thoughtful smile had turned more cheeky, almost as if he had an ulterior motive for his request.

No, that thought seemed ridiculous, so I pushed it aside at the same time I pushed myself out of my seat.

“Of course, what do you want?” Thankfully we were on the motorway by now and it was perfectly safe to walk around again, or to handle boiling water. While it had initially seemed like a horrible idea to make coffee while driving, the band seemed to run on caffeine, so after many days worth of practice, I’d gotten pretty good at it, having only burnt myself a handful of times.

“Just black, please.”

I noticed Oli’s attention on his notebook falter, giving me a side glance as I prepared the drink.

“Perfect.” Mat said low, nearly under his breath, as I handed him his coffee, giving me a similar smile to the dirty one from last night, eliciting images from his hand wrapped around his cock, how he breathed my name as cum spilled onto his stomach.

Get your fucking shit together, Alice.

Right as I was about to turn around, to sit back down next to Oli, Mat moved over in his seat, clearly indicating for me to sit next to him instead.

I froze.

“Smells good that.” Oli said loudly behind me, shutting the notebook with a slap, “Alice, make me one too.”

I looked back at Oli, but he was staring at Mat, as if to say two can play at that game.

But I didn’t want to be part of the game, in fact, I wanted the game to go somewhere very far, far away, and never return.

Yet all I could think of to do was follow Oli’s orders.

When I finished making his drink I walked over to him, trying to mentally prepare myself for whatever would come next, hoping this would be the last of it.

“Ta, love.” He purred, giving me the same wicked smile that nearly floored me the first time I was introduced to him – now it stirred so much more in my chest than just attraction.

“You know what, can I get a sugar?” Mat said casually behind me, causing my heart to sink, but Oli’s eyes on me were unwavering, making me wonder if he’d expected Mat to continue their ridiculous game.

“Of course.” I breathed anxiously as I went to grab some sugar packets.

Lee let out an exaggerated sigh, clearly annoyed by their antics, “Fucking hell lads, start swinging fists at each other instead, so the poor bird can take a bloody seat.”

While I wanted to disintegrate, Oli seemed nothing but amused by Lee’s outburst.

“Can’t do that, I’d never hurt the elderly.” Oli said with a wide grin, staring teasingly at Mat.

Mat huffed, but he also seemed oddly entertained, “Fuck off, I’m like six months older than you.”

I slipped some sugar packets on the table next to Mat, but he didn’t pay me any mind as he was too preoccupied with Oli, so I took a seat on the other side of the sofa, close to Lee – a neutral statement, not publicly picking either man's side.

Oli’s eyes on Mat intensified, also not paying attention to me anymore, “Eight actually– you think you could take me?”

Mat just laughed at him, “Of course, you fight like a headless chicken.”

“When did you ever see me fight?” Oli asked with a frown.

Mat fidgeted slightly as his lips bloomed into a guilty smile, “In school.”

“You gonna judge me on my fighting skills from fucking 20 odd years ago?” Oli asked in amused disbelief.

“It’s either that or Call of Duty last week, and we both know how that went.”

Oli’s frown deepened as he leaned forward in his seat, pointing at Mat, “Hey– that’s not fair, you kept fucking with my controller.”

Their banter was friendly, fun even, clearly showcasing both how well, and how long, they’ve known each other, and while I was happy they so quickly moved away from the original predicament; me, it didn’t stop me from nearly suffocating by the weight of all my guilt, which was accumulating at an alarming rate.

The idea of potentially putting a crack in such a good friendship was horrifying, and everything in me was screaming to put an end to it, to make things simple for everyone and just leave the touring team.

But there were already feelings involved, made painfully clear by how my heart tugged every time I looked at Oli.

As I watched the men joke and enjoy each other's company, I realised I was in entirely too deep to walk away now; the only way out of this mess was through it, so I would approach today with an open mind, trying not to let my fears rule me like they have my whole life.

Lee leaned in to speak close to my ear as Mat and Oli were still joking around.

“You alright, love?”

My eyes snapped to him in surprise at his question, but he was staring at my lap with a frown, so I looked down at my hands in my lap; I’d unknowingly been clutching a sugar packet so hard it had burst open, spilling sugar all over me – and I hadn’t even noticed.

“Just a bit tense.” I said, knowing damn well I was close to a panic attack.

Knowing damn well that fear still ruled me.

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