#virginian wolfsnake

[when-we-drive-away-in-secret]

navy 👀

Navy: I will steal your sugar bowl

NOT AGAIN!!!

Little do you know I've been deploying countless decoy sugar bowls, leaving them out, making them known. You may steal a sugar bowl from me, but will it be the sugar bowl? Make your play, but know you'll only get one chance. Choose wisely

[lesbian-in-leather]

kit/georgina for the ship meme

Oooh that's an interesting one, thank you!!

The idea that their dynamic is "the scientists among theatre kids" is definately very appealing to me—the idea that they are both very mechanically-minded (Kit with actual machines and Georgina treating the human mind the same way) and can actually discuss things with that straight-forwardness without being sidetracked by metaphor is a super fun one

On the other hand, they could be seen as almost an "opposites attract" scenario in the sense that I've always imagined Kit struggling with hiding her emotions, while Georgina is an expert at it. The lack of balance in that regard would absolutely be really fun to explore

I also just love adding to my "Kit's type is villains" headcanon (though does it really count as a headcanon at this point) but (because I like angst) I also love the idea that for once Kit thought she'd picked someone sweet and good and then....... got to know Georgina better and felt utterly betrayed

Send me a ship and I’ll tell you three things I like about it!

[navree]

beatrice baudelaire!

my girl!

How I feel about this character: I've always been really interested in Beatrice because of how mysterious she is. Like, as a fandom we have a lot of headcanons and stuff we've extrapolated from the books and supplementary material, but on pure canon there's a lot of gaps in what we know about her that makes her interesting, especially when it comes to fans trying to fill in those gaps. And I like that she was just this super cool and super hot woman that everyone was so incredibly obsessed with no matter what side they were on, everyone and their mother had a complex about Beatrice.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: If Daniel Handler didn't want me to become far too obsessed with Lemony and Beatrice as a couple, he shouldn't have written five hundred thousand words of Lemony going "Beatrice I love you so much let me list it all" as a way to reassure her when she asks 'hey do you still love me' in the 200 page break up book she wrote. That's just insane, of course I ship it. I'm also really into Beatrice/Bertrand as a couple too, people can have multiple great loves. And depending on my mood I can be really into the lemonberryice throuple.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Beatrice and Kit's relationship is always gonna be interesting to me, and Olaf and Beatrice just seem to have had the most fascinating dynamic, legit friends in childhood to some more vitriolic friendship and then she murders his parents and then he torments her innocent children, it's Good.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I don't know if I've got any necessarily unpopular ones because this fandom in general, and especially the bit focused on the sugarbowl generation, is very small and most of the stuff I've seen I agree with. I guess I might characterize Beatrice as a bit, idk, colder than most? For all her other facets, Olaf was someone she knew and seems to have gotten along with well on a personal level, and she still doesn't seem to have spent much time outwardly agonizing over what might have been straight cold blooded murder. I don't think she was evil or unfeeling, and there's a reason she pulled back from VFD stuff especially after having children, but there might be a more ruthless streak there in my view than in some other people's.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: idk man, that she fuckin lived? It's a bummer that she's dead, she was a devoted mother and a good friend and an important part of a lot of people's lives and it seems like a bunch of worlds were dimmer without her in them, her kids are gonna miss her for the rest of their lives and Lemony is still deeply affected by losing her literal decades after the fact. I wish she'd been able to meet little Beatrice too, I think they would have gotten along great.

[gellavonhamster]

for the character thing if you’re still doing them… how about monty?

How I feel about this character: Monty my beloved. I think he's my favourite among the guardians - sure, he fucked up too, but he was really trying to make the Baudelaires feel welcome and at home. And he's really funny and charming! And he loves animals! And Netflix made him ridiculously handsome! Yeah, love this guy.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: I imagine he and Gustav had a very sweet romance before the Horrors.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Can't remember how and why I came up with the idea of him and Bertrand sharing an apartment when they were younger, but I am very fond of this headcanon of mine

My unpopular opinion about this character: I think I remember seeing well-argued posts on why he must be older than Lemony, Olaf, and most other Sugar Bowl Generation volunteers, but I've been imagining him the same age as everyone else for so long that I'm not gonna try to change my mind at this point.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: Part of me wants to say "not dying", but from the narrative standpoint, all first guardians should die, isn't that so? It's not even the kind of situation where the kind of ambiguous fate faced by many characters in the later books would have worked. So instead I'm gonna say that it would've been nice to get more mentions of him in the later books, either by other characters or within Lemony's narration.

[littlestsnicket]

25 & 26?

25. What other websites or resources do you use most often when you write?

hm, this is a really interesting question. i don’t know that i use a lot of resources when i write. i do almost all of my writing in google docs, and i use google so much to do basic research and check what words actually mean. what with the AI stuff, i should probably stop doing that, pick an online dictionary, and go straight to the source.

i do also watch youtube videos for research purposes a lot—like the rabbit holes i went down tying to explain how to hand make noodles or re-string a lute. i get hung up on explaining little tiny details, that are not remotely plot relevant, correctly.

oh, actually, a digital/ctl+f-able copy of the source material and the sprint board i keep in my bullet journal are actually the most important resources for me.

26. Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or one that was only dialogue?

dialogue only! i think if you’re writing drabbles either is fairly easy, but (probably obviously from my love of drabbles) i love arbitrary structural constraints so the idea of writing a longer fic that is all dialogue does really appeal to me (adding this to my mental list). also, my go to solution to something feeling flat or too passive is to re-write it with more dialogue, so having no dialogue in a longer fic seems like it would be really really difficult.

thank you for asking!

[beatricebidelaire]

lemon! of course 🍋

lemon - "we're drinking root beer floats together"

we absolutely are!!!!! physically im in front of my computer but mentally we're on a balcony in a hotel denouement room overlooking the ocean and drinking root beer floats together

[library-child]

@thefinaljediknight, thanks for the tag!

Last reads: I've just finished 'Dune' by Frank Herbert and I really enjoyed it. There's such a pervasive sense of doom throughout the entire book.

Current reads: Nearly done with 'Als ich ein kleiner Junge war' (meaning 'When I was a little boy', there seems to be no English version) by Erich Kästner. A super heart-felt and witty memoir.

Next reads: Spooky season is upon us, so I'll pick up the one creepy book from my TBR, which is 'The White Dominican' by Gustav Meyrink. And I need to check out some horror fanfiction.

Tagging: @al-val-meadow, @volunteerfelinedetectives, @snowdropnature, @dragoneyes618, @cleverqueencommander, @jacobsnicket, @acacia-may, @virginian-wolfsnake, @wimplee, @insane-author, and anyone I forgot and/or feels free to join. 😊

[hitsuzenhusbands]

hey! i hope you're having a good day! i just read your (amazing!) asoue fic "ashes to ashes," and i was fascinated by the way you portrayed kit and olaf. i thought i'd send this ask because i'd really love to hear more of your thoughts on their dynamic if you feel like sharing? but if you don't feel like expanding on it, i totally understand! thank you so much for sharing your beautiful work on ao3!

OHH anon you are so kind...i apologize for being so extremely late but i just finished writing a little analysis so i figured now's about the right time to write a semi-legible response. might have been scary and incomprehensible otherwise. but i am finally here to scream and cry and thank you so desperately because im SO happy you enjoyed them AND decided to ask for more info! <3

to begin, i'd be absolutely inconsolable if i didn't point you towards @virginian-wolfsnake's fic the eye of the storm, probably one of my fave k&o fics of all time that delves into the meat of their relationship through the years from the perspective of kit. they're young and still excited by missions and flirty and tender and genuine, and, in time, when the rest of their world collapses, so do they--messy and tense and so wonderfully realistic you have to read it and then read it again. honestly, if you don't want to read the rest of this but still want an answer, just read that. but also read it anyway

and now i have to ask you to forgive me...i have not read the books in a very long time and while i know the netflix series (in comparison) is bad and awful and terrible, i have watched it a million times. so if i'm wrong on anything. that's why.

to begin, the version of olaf i depicted in my fic is at the height of his...how do you say...pathetic misery. not including the spiral he has during the series. to me, the death of his parents are the beginning of his downfall into something-like-insanity, but he's still (and will continue to be) recognizably himself, if that makes sense. he's always been messy and emotional and dramatic (see the line: "...Kit has seen him in worse states and with a much better view..."), but only now does he reveal not a different side of himself per se, but a different angle of one that already existed.

im a fervent believer that olaf's always been a little self destructive and a lot crazy. hes spent the greater half of his life coming to terms with the fact that he is intrinsically not as noble as the rest of vfd--hes impulsive and obnoxious and self-obsessed, barely even literate at times--and it takes a special kind of guy to carve the insignia of the organization full of people he despises into his own front door. still, his parents' death was a catalyst, meaning he wasn't entirely opposed to vfd beforehand. he probably liked the missions and the secrecy and the dramatics, obviously the disguises and everything, but i think before the night at the opera it was really just a source of fun for him. he never truly grasped the reality of it, the nature of his actions and the weight of his involvement. whether that was out of naivety or pure neglect of the facts is up for debate. (there's a little bit of this in the shattering of thalia and melpomene if that interests you at all, beloved anon. see the line: "...[Esme] could never compare to the extent to which [Olaf] removes himself from everyone else entirely. How he spends so much time worrying about himself he almost forgets to worry about himself...Esme could never truly get lost in her own greatness. Could never turn a blind eye to the inner workings of V.F.D.")

kit, on the other hand, definitely did. serving as a volunteer was her purpose, the sole thing she had to cling to. she dedicated her life to it, making conscious decisions to go against her moral code in the hope that it all truly was for a greater good. i think, at times, she could fall into her own little fits of self-destruction, putting vfd above herself entirely (see the line: "This wouldn’t be the first time she’d done something she would never truly volunteer for...he’d still spent year after year watching her run off...to do something she could never speak of." "...she still returned with clenched teeth and knit eyebrows, as though she had no choice in the matter at all.")

to avoid any more convolution, in my mind it goes something like this: both are volunteers--olaf born and raised (along with beatrice), kit torn from her family and thrust into the thick of it so early on its all she knows. they grow up, probably-definitely know each other but dont know each other until, say, late teens-early twenties?

up until then, they've been everything previously described, but intermingling with one another changes this. olaf's easygoing approach rubs off on kit, partly because she finds more joy in his company than in missions, partly because he makes every attempt to keep her from leaving. i like to think she tries to keep his relatively flimsy moral code in check, or at the very least restrain his temper to the best of her abilities.

to me, they're a simultaneously great and terrible couple. at their best, they counteract each other in a positive way as described above and serve as a welcome distraction from the realities of a crumbling vfd, a little island of tenderness and domesticity in the ocean of turmoil that surrounds them.

and at their worst, their personalities combat so violently it's hard to see how they ever could have been together. olaf deals out the worst of it, prone to neglect and self-isolation, a deeply inset refusal to discuss anything with her, an inclination towards firestarting and an increasingly poor reputation with everyone kit knows. then again, kit isn't free of blame (if you can call it that), she's just as opposed to talking anything out as he is, and her isolation takes on the shape of running off to do as many missions as as she can before she's dead on her feet. she's pulled in different directions--a well-instilled hatred towards firestarers, only further influenced by whatever rumours olaf's growing list of enemies supplies her, versus her love for him, her knowledge of who he really is, a concept that is often tested. (see the line: "He’s reminded of a fight they once had, about something or other, that ended in her angry admission that it was easier to be upset with him when he wasn’t nearby.") 

anyway, the idea is they grow further and further apart both ideologically and physically/relationship-wise until the opera night and the crash following that (see: the whole fic!) and from then on i think they fall into something like an evil situationship. they barely see each other, complete opposite sides of the schism. i say situationship because i think when they do see each other (on missions, at events/in public, in private, etc.) it is just a terrible experience no matter what. they're both torn between hating the other for what they know about them/what they did (i like to think olaf finds out about kit supplying the darts) and reminiscing/yearning for what they once had.

for the sake of this i wont give my thoughts on whose baby kit has because that's a whole other thing (not really. its just more of a fun hc i think about on occasion as opposed to something concrete in canon or even my version of canon) but their scene in the end does make me insane. its a culmination of all the time spent wishing what happened didnt happen, almost as though theyre seeing each other for the first time once again, perhaps not blind to the past but looking away for (on olafs part) one final moment of normalcy.

i hope thats what you were looking for to any degree, anon. im a little rusty on my lore but they matter to me soo much. if i have to leave this on anything, its go read eye of the storm. kitlaf fic of all time.

[asouefanworkevent]

and that's a wrap on the wicked way exchange!! always a little sad the day after an exchange ends, isn't it? everything is over now. no more working and editing and waiting and getting in last minute details and everything. but now there's so much exciting fanwork to see! look at it all!!! we all did this!!!!!

thank you all again for participating!!!!!! i'm so happy and so proud of you all. ⭐⭐



@lesbianscieszka: Interesting (esme and jerome), for @gray-zelle

@library-child: Associates (beatrice and olaf), for @hitsuzenhusbands

@gray-zelle: Hearts & Hives (jacquelyn/esme, jacques/jerome, olaf/esme), for @archangelsunited

@accidentallylita: Jacques and Olivia fic, for @snicketbae

@acacia-may: Good Things Find Their Way Back (baudelaires and quagmires post-canon), for @junowritesstuff

@memento-fugaces: Jacques and Quigley fic, for @nothing-to-see-here-bye-yall

@snicketbae: Jacques and Olivia art, for @accidentallylita

@volunteerfelinedetectives: SBTS Associates fic, for @cherrycokeisnice

@nothing-to-see-here-bye-yall: Snicket siblings art, for @bittersbetter

@hitsuzenhusbands: The Shattering of Thalia and Melpomene (beatrice and olaf), for @virginian-wolfsnake

@bittersbetter: SBTS Associates art, for @miriel-therindes

@virginian-wolfsnake: death of an enemy (esme after beatrice dies), for @navree

@navree: Two Scoops (lemony and babybea), for @acacia-may

@littlestsnicket: All the News in Fits of Print (moxie and geraldine), for @whoslaurapalmer

@miriel-therindes: Sugar Bowl Gen Class Photo art, for @larryy0urwaiter

@larryy0urwaiter: Bertrand and Lemony art, for @odd-kid-42

@snckt: Denouement edit, for @lyeekha

@lyeekha: Beatrice/Bertrand/Lemony) Lion Tamer art, for @littlestsnicket

@somewhat-bored: Late Night Thoughts (ellington/cleo), for @volunteerfelinedetectives

@whoslaurapalmer: sweetest things (pre-canon baudelaire family), for @snckt

@junowritesstuff: A Chance Encounter (violet/quigley post-canon), for @noodle-the-queen

@noodle-the-queen: Jacquelyn and Esme art, for @lesbianscieszka

@jacobsnicket: anyway, don't be a stranger (lemony returning to stain'd-by-the-sea), for @missingmae

@cherrycokeisnice: Two Years After "Why Is This Night Different Than All Other Nights?" (ellington and cleo), for @somewhat-bored

@odd-kid-42: Non-restrictive Clause to Some (lemony and moxie talk about asoue), for @library-child

@archangelsunited: On That Account (dewey in vfd), for @memento-fugaces

@missingmae: the misadventures of a very kind editor (lemony and the editor), for @jacobsnicket

[unfortunatetheorist]

The R - Part 1:

What is the connection between Mr Remora and Duchess R [of Winnipeg]?

One of the many mysteries that Lemony Snicket has left behind for readers (and viewers, to a certain extent) is 'What does the R stand for, in "Duchess R" ?' I am going to attempt to answer this question using any resources available, under the title 'The R'. This will be over a series of unfortunate posts, in this format.

Firstly, we must look for any and all clues that can give us even the slightest hint as to what R might stand for.

For this, I have gone through every character in ASOUE and this is produced: (after the cut, but feel free to skip ahead)

Lemony Snicket

Violet Baudelaire 

Klaus Baudelaire 

Sunny Baudelaire 

Count Olaf

Bald Man with the Long Nose 

Mrs. Bass 

Beatrice Baudelaire 

Beatrice Baudelaire II 

Bertrand Baudelaire 

Bruce 

Colette�� 

Fernald 

Hal 

Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender 

Hugo 

Incredibly Deadly Viper 

Geraldine Julienne 

Kevin 

Kind Editor 

Man with a Beard but No Hair

Vice Principal Nero

Phil 

Arthur Poe  

Duncan Quagmire 

Isadora Quagmire  

Quigley Quagmire  

Mr. Remora 

Carmelita Spats 

Kit Snicket 

Esmé Squalor 

Jerome Squalor 

Justice Strauss 

White-Faced Women 

Woman with Hair but No Beard

Albert Poe 

Edgar Poe 

Polly Poe 

Wart-Faced Man

Alaskan Cow Lizard 

Androgynous Cobra  

Madame diLustro  

Dissonant Toad  

Green Gimlet Toad 

Inky Newt 

Irascible Python 

O. Lucafont 

Mamba du Mal 

Monty Montgomery 

Monty Montgomery's Sister

Gustav Sebald 

Stephano 

Virginian Wolfsnake

Ike Anwhistle

Josephine Anwhistle

Bertrand Baudelaire's Cousin

Gina-Sue

 Larry Your-Waiter 

Captain Sham

Charles

 Foreman Firstein

 Flacutono

Georgina Orwell

 Shirley 

Sir

Elwyn 

Coach Genghis 

Ms. Tench

Ben 

Gunther

Chief of Police

Council of Elders 

Detective Dupin 

Hector

 Mr. Lesko 

Officer Luciana 

Mrs. Morrow 

Verhoogen Family 

V.F.D. Crows

Babs

Bearded Man 

Laura V. Bleediotie 

Lou 

Mattathias

 Milt

 Mr. Sirin

 Volunteers Fighting Disease

Beverly and Elliot

 Olivia Caliban 

Chabo the Wolf Baby 

Man With Pimples On His Chin 

Ringmaster 

Volunteer Feline Detectives

Infant Servant

C.M. Kornbluth 

Snow Gnats 

Snow Scouts 

V.F.D. Eagles 

White-Faced Women's Sibling 

Winnipeg Scout

Gregor Anwhistle 

Fiona 

The Great Unknown 

Captain Widdershins 

Mrs. Widdershins

Count Olaf's father 

Count Olaf's mother 

Dewey Denouement 

Ernest Denouement 

Frank Denouement

Alonso 

Ariel 

Jonah Bellamy 

Sadie Bellamy 

Rabbi Bligh 

Brewster 

Byam 

Friday Caliban 

Miranda Caliban 

Calypso 

Erewhon

Ferdinand 

Finn 

Professor Fletcher 

Gonzalo 

Ishmael 

Dr. Kurtz 

Larsen 

Ms. Marlow 

Monday

Madame Nordoff 

Omeros 

Mr. Pitcairn 

Robinson 

Sherman 

Thursday 

Weyden 

Willa

Beekeeper

Building Committee 

Emily Dickinson 

Dolores  

Esmé Squalor Fan Club 

Gerta 

Daniel Handler

Haruki

 Ivan Lachrymose 

Eleanora Poe 

Lena Pukalie 

Duchess R 

R's Mother 

R's Father 

Young Rölf 

Sally Sebald

Shoemaker 

A. Snicket 

B. Snicket 

Chas. Snicket 

D. Snicket 

E. Snicket 

F. Snicket 

G 

H 

I  

Jacob Snicket  

M 

N 

O 

Mr. Spats

Mrs. Spats 

Town Fathers 

Valorous Farms Dairy 

Baron van de Wetering

Yeah. Every single one.

Now, let's rule out everyone who does not have a name beginning with R, or is unclear: (again, feel free to skip ahead)

Bald Man with the Long Nose 

Mrs. Bass 

Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender 

Incredibly Deadly Viper 

Kind Editor 

Man with a Beard but No Hair

Mr. Remora 

White-Faced Women 

Woman with Hair but No Beard

Wart-Faced Man

Madame diLustro  

Monty Montgomery's Sister

Bertrand Baudelaire's Cousin

 Foreman Firstein

Coach Genghis 

Ms. Tench

Verhoogen Family 

 Mr. Sirin

Man With Pimples On His Chin 

Infant Servant

White-Faced Women's Sibling 

Winnipeg Scout

The Great Unknown 

Captain Widdershins 

Mrs. Widdershins

Count Olaf's father 

Count Olaf's mother 

Rabbi Bligh 

Dr. Kurtz 

Ms. Marlow 

Madame Nordoff 

Mr. Pitcairn 

Robinson 

Beekeeper

Duchess R 

R's Mother 

R's Father 

Young Rölf 

Mr. Spats

Mrs. Spats 

Town Fathers 

As the title states, we'll keep some focus on Remora, but we'll eliminate all other minor characters:

Bald Man with the Long Nose 

Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender 

Incredibly Deadly Viper 

Kind Editor 

Man with a Beard but No Hair

Mr. Remora 

White-Faced Women 

Woman with Hair but No Beard

Wart-Faced Man

Madame diLustro  

Monty Montgomery's Sister

Bertrand Baudelaire's Cousin

Robinson 

Duchess R 

R's Mother 

R's Father 

Young Rölf 

According to Various Fan Deductions:

TMWABBNH & TWWHBNB are Gifford & Ghede

The White-Faced Women are Zada and Zora

Lemony's Kind Editor is Moxie Mallahan

Madame diLustro is Sunny Baudelaire

This rules out the 4 of them.

Bald Man with the Long Nose 

Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender 

Incredibly Deadly Viper 

Mr. Remora 

Wart-Faced Man

Monty Montgomery's Sister

Bertrand Baudelaire's Cousin

Robinson 

Duchess R 

R's Mother 

R's Father 

Young Rölf 

Logically speaking, why would there be a connection between Ink and Duchess R? Let's eliminate unlikely possibilities:

Mr. Remora  

Monty Montgomery's Sister

Bertrand Baudelaire's Cousin

Robinson 

Duchess R 

R's Mother 

R's Father 

Young Rölf 

Monty Montgomery's sister would be (_insert name here_) Montgomery. This, to me, rules her out too... and the same logic applies to Bertrand's cousin.

Mr. Remora  

Robinson 

(Duchess R) 

(R's Mother) 

(R's Father)

Young Rölf 

Obviously her family are related:

Mr. Remora  

Robinson - Islander

Young Rölf 

So, the above names are generated. I will, henceforth, analyse a link between each character and R, starting with Remora.

POINTS:

a. It's known that a few characters in the Snicket-verse have alliterating names, such as Quigley Quagmire, Beatrice Baudelaire.

b. It's also known that some characters have WEIRD connections to others, such as Quigley's 'relation' to Mr Poe.

THEORY: Given a. and b. to be true, Mr R _______ Remora, has some abstract connection to the Duchess.

This connection can only really be established if one goes by Netflix canon and assumes Nero's surname to be Feint, and combines this with ATWQ:

Duchess R is Remora's boss' ancestor's murderer's friend.

R's friend is Lemony, who murdered Hangfire, who is the ancestor of Nero, Remora's boss.

Part 2 Still to Come...

¬ Th3r3534rch1ngr4ph, Unfortunate Theorist/Snicketologist

[when-we-drive-away-in-secret]

georgina 👀

I Dare You by Ferris & Sylvester

oooooh okay it was hard to choose just one for her but I think I have to go with this one because it has the correct vibes of like, a bit hypnosis-y and also She Can And Will Stab A Bitch, y'know?

[lesbian-in-leather]

ooo thanks for the tag! can you tell us something about 2?

Yes I absolutely can!!

Okay so Bloodlust was inspired by a song on my eswell playlist (Hit and Run by LOLO) and it was literally just... Georgina and Esmé commit a murder together lmao. Which is sort of why it never got posted because it's just kinda short and like. Doesn't really have a lot going on? I count it as a WIP though because I do quite like it, but I feel like it'd need to be longer for me to post it on ao3 or anything so... who knows, maybe some day I'll add to it and it'll go somewhere!

Instead of a snippet I'm literally going to include the whole thing because! It's short! Might as well see the light of day (content warning: blood, violence, weaponry)

The knife sliced across his throat as easily as a boat glides through the water, leaving ripples of crimson red in its wake. A torrent flowed from him, soaking his clothes as he crumpled, coating Esmé’s hands as she held him upright; savouring the kill. Her eyes met Georgina’s, and the optometrist saw the rush of power that always came with taking a life. Many words had been used to describe Esmé Gigi Geniveve Squalor – ‘cruel’, ‘vain’, ‘villainous’, ‘manipulative’, and ‘a terrible actress who cannot sing and should have never replaced a certain remarkable woman in the odious play directed by Count Olaf’, were merely a few choice examples. But in that moment, Georgina’s mind could conjure only one.

“Breath-taking.” It was an apt description – the word ‘breath-taking’, as you probably know, can be meant both figuratively and literally. If someone is literally breath-taking, then they are depriving someone else of their breath (someone might, for example, take the breath of City’s sixth most important financial advisor by cutting his throat with a knife in the entranceway of a mansion belonging to the City’s seventh most important financial advisor, so that the City’s eighth most important financial adviser could very efficiently jump two rankings in one evening). If someone is figuratively breath-taking, however, then they are so beautiful that the observer merely feels as though they cannot breathe, and all they can do is watch in awe as this beautiful person stands before them like an ethereal apparition.

It pains me to say that, in this moment – slightly out of breath, her eyes alight with the visceral thrill that accompanied her villainous deed, hands bloody and still holding the dripping knife, as a cruel, merciless smile spread over her features – in Georgina’s eyes, at least, Esmé Squalor was breath-taking in all senses of the word.

She dropped her most recent victim – who was still gurgling slightly as blood spilled from his gaping wound – and stepped over his body without a second thought, reaching Georgina in a few purposeful strides. Esmé’s towering heels clicked on the stone floor before she snatched Georgina’s gun from her hands, tossing it to one side and fisting a bloodstained hand in the lapel of the optometrist’s blazer as it skittered away. She pressed the blade of her knife against Georgina’s throat with her free hand as she pulled her closer, their faces barely a hair’s breadth apart. Georgina should have objected to the blood now staining her clothes, should have fought back against the threat that Esmé was making, should have drawn a clear line in the metaphorical sand, should have finally set a boundary in their impossible, ever-shifting, pseudo-relationship. If it were anyone else, she would have done so without a second thought. But, then again, if it were anyone else, she wouldn’t have found the act nearly so arousing. For an instant they stayed there, eyes locked, before the tension that had been building between them all evening finally snapped and Georgina couldn’t prevent her eyes from flicking down to Esmé’s slightly parted lips – painted the same shade as the blood spattered over her collarbone, in place of her usual jewellery.

A rapidly diminishing voice in the back of Georgina’s mind was still vaguely aware that she shouldn’t be allowing Esmé so much control, should at least put on the pretence of fighting back, but the act she had just witnessed – their plan finally put into motion – and the way it had affected Esmé was far too enticing to fight against. Even as she found herself being pushed backwards until she hit the wall, Esmé discarding the knife on a nearby table, just close enough to retain the threat and the thrill, but freeing her hands and allowing her to begin ridding Georgina of her clothing. It would also have been easier to object if Esmé hadn’t been kissing her quite so thoroughly, occupying both Georgina’s mouth and her mind until all she could do was hold on to Esmé with equal ferocity – one hand on her waist and the other winding its way into her hair.

“Here?” she asked, in the brief moment when it was proved that even Esmé had to catch her breath on occasion. “Now?” the half-laugh quickly dissolved into a moan as Esmé focused on Georgina’s neck, teeth and tongue lavishing Esmé’s sadistic attentions over the skin there in a deliberately unequal ratio.

“Now.” Esmé practically growled into Georgina’s throat, tearing through the fabric of Georgina’s blouse in her desperation to remove it, nails clawing at the exposed skin beneath, and all the optometrist could do was arch into her lover’s touch and moan her agreement.

[navree]

🌹

for every "🌹" received in my inbox i'll post one random sentence of a random WIP i'm currently writing

There's a current moratorium on facial mutilation in place at Goddard right now, at least for their particular circle, so Rachel settles for getting most of the latte to splash and burn on David's neck when she flings it at him.

[gellavonhamster]

Tagged by @badtzbot (thank you ❤)

Rules: Go to your (current/main) AO3 account and find the following:

What ratings do you write most of your fics under?

T. I can't really write sex, alas, but I love making characters swear and drink alcohol, especially the latter (I suspect I'm sublimating my own wish to drink way more often than I actually do), and I feel like that's the most appropriate rating for that.

What are your top three fandoms?

ASOUE with 20 works, Dracula with 6, and Turn: Washington's Spies with 5. All statistics are going to be not quite accurate in my case though, because a lot of my fics are posted both in English and in Russian. So that's technically one story, but two works. For example, the 5 Turn fics in question are two fics in original Russian, the English translations of both of them, and a collection of my old fandom poems in which one poem is for Turn. (I am very much not translating poems into English because trying to make them rhyme would drive me insane). On the other hand, most of my ASOUE fics in Russian are posted as a single work, each chapter being a new short fic, but their English translations are posted as separate works. If I was posting both Russian and English versions separately, the number of my ASOUE works would've been even higher.

What is the top character you write about?

Lemony Snicket appears in 12 of my fics (counting stories, not works, i.e. not counting the original and the translation as separate stories). Fitting for the first-person narrator and a fucking legend.

What are your top three pairings?

I want everyone to know that this is the point at which I realized that I don't need to count all that manually because the list of my own works also has the same sorting and filtering menu as each fandom tag. I may be stupid. Anyway! Lemonberry ice is, of course, on top with 9 works, or 6 stories if we don't count the original and the translation separately. Next is Duchess R/Beatrice with 7 works, or 4 stories. The third relationship on the list is actually a platonic one - Duchess R & Lemony with 7 works/4 stories too. If "pairings" here are to mean romance only, then Smoker/Tashigi, Quincey/Jack, and Duchess R/Sally Sebald all are at 4 works/2 stories.

What are the top three additional tags?

Not trying to subtract originals and translations here - Pre-Canon (15), Post-Canon (15), and - see the first question - Alcohol (8), lol. Oh, and Canon-Typical Violence also has 8.

Does any of this surprise you?

No. Perhaps the only surprising part is that I've written two R/Sally fics? Neither of my stories in which they appear is centered on this ship, but it's there. I can't even say I ship them, it's just that they're among the few Sugar Bowl Generation characters who are likely to be still alive by the end of the series, so I like to give them a little happy ending together.

Tagging @patron-saints, @enchi-elm, @littlestsnicket, @tangentiallly, and @virginian-wolfsnake - if you want to do this, of course :)

[littlestsnicket]

bertrand/ernest for the ship meme?

thank you! this is an excellent ask!

1. they both are *always* wondering if the other person would rather they were someone else (its not true though, neither of them interact with anyone else with quite the sort of honesty they show to each other (not that bertrand isn’t generally an honest person, he can just allow himself to be a worse version of himself around ernest (beatrice knows he has it in him and wouldn’t care but bertrand cares, he wants to be the best version of himself for her)))

2. i think this is vera’s head canon but they’re pan pals post schism. they send each other letters full of mundane things they wouldn’t bother anyone else with

3. bertrand wouldn’t hesitate to kill ernest if he thought it was necessary. ernest thinks killing bertrand is inherently not necessary. (but that has more to do with their views on morality and the schism than how they feel about each other specifically.)

(now i want to write fic for them delving into their relationship with vfd! probably too much of my brain is plotting witcher fic and i really really want to write two other asoue things first… but we’ll see)

[fakeoldmanfucker]

Tagged by @fakrichie to make a poll with five of my favorite characters and tag five people to do the same. Thanks Kay :)

*these are in no particular order

No pressure tags: @setting-in-a-honeymoon @virginian-wolfsnake @yeehawesome @bardicindignation @kazutoes and anyone else who wants to