#viktor x chronically ill reader

[annoyance-for-u]

This is so heart-warming

thinking about viktor with a chronically ill reader. you know? we see the vision, right?

it just works.

the thing with chronic pain, illnesses, disabilities, all of that - is that you can't always see them. sometimes you can, sure, you can see the mobility aids and the not-standing-up-for-too-long and the bruising from blood draws and sometimes you can see the compression garments, the pills and inhalers and the i'm fine, i just need a moment-

but most people just don't pay attention to that. or if they do, they don't put the pieces together fast enough to figure out what's really going on under the surface. viktor does, though; he's been there, and most of the time he's way beyond hiding it. or, well, he's way beyond hiding some of it.

walking with a cane was like carrying a neon sign that said yes there is something different here. yes i can't walk the way you can. no it's not going to get better. that last part wasn't directly evident just from him using a cane, sure, but with the way his cane looked, it should've been pretty clear. He had used one practically forever and it had evolved with him, he'd made it as comfortable to use as it could be, had even made it match his uniform.

so yeah. viktor knew what it was like. he'd been the disabled kid forever, even if some of the others were never going to say it out loud. that was just a thing about him, and he knew how hard it could be to navigate something like that in an academic environment. it was hard to admit you couldn't do something, that you had to sit down, that you needed a moment. that sometimes your body was just falling apart for no particular reason and it was just another tuesday.

sometimes it was easier to sit with the pain than take medication in the middle of a meeting, knowing that someone would make a bigger deal out of it than it had to be, even if it was just raising their eyebrows meaningfully. they'd think about you differently afterwards.

he could see you push through it, and he didn't blame you, really, he did that himself, too, but - he didn't want you to hurt yourself. you hadn't been in the lab as long as he had, so he could understand you being a little cautious with how you acted and what you told people, but he didn't want you to feel like you had to put on a show for him. he was, after all, walking around with the equivalent of a light-up sign of i'm disabled, too, and he liked to think of himself as someone who wouldn't come off as judgemental about stuff like that. other stuff, sure, stupid stuff, but not that.

so when he sees you dealing with the telltale signs of being in pain, he conveniently sends jayce and the others to pick up some parts that would take a while to collect and that they wouldn't actually need until the next day. but better prepared, right? what's the harm.

and then he comes to sit next to you and sighs deeply. leans back. relaxes to the best of his abilities. asks if you're alright, and sounds like he already knows the answer.

you sigh too, shift your position, and answer with it's fine. and viktor recognizes the strain in your voice, in your posture, and he knows there's a key difference between this and i'm fine, but he'll take it. it's not what he'd like, but he'll take it.

he leans over to dig around his belongings, and then offers you a bag of candied almonds.

"if you're going to take pain killers, it's better if you eat something first," he says, and you just stare at him. "i assume you haven't taken anything yet. nothing strong enough, at least," he continues, casually, and you take a deep breath and accept the almonds.

he smiles. continues like this is totally normal. "jayce made me start carrying around some food so i could do that. for myself, i mean. but it doesn't hurt to have some snacks around either way, i suppose."

he knows he's skirting around the real topic of the conversation, but he also knows that sometimes people get uncomfortable around his bluntness, and you hadn't exactly told him you were in pain, so he'd understand it if you were a little weirded out. after all, most people didn't notice this stuff. but you haven't run away from him, and you're eating, and then you're digging around your own bag to take your medication, so he'll count this as a win.

thanks, you exhale, handing back the almonds, and he takes a handful of them himself.

"i'm fine, really," you continue, not really looking at him, "it's just hard sometimes."

he nods. it was - even if he didn't know the specifics, he knew that it was true. especially since you had been hiding it from the others. and with something like that, something the others couldn't see, the invisible step to let them see it would grow bigger and bigger with time, when they expected you to be able to do everything they did without a second thought.

he also knows you didn't mean fine in the dictionary definition sense of the word, but more in the this is normal and you don't need to worry -sense. and that's fine. he was used to functioning on different parameters than most people, so this version of fine was good enough.

my body just isn't always very reliable, you explain with a sigh, and that he knows better than well.

he hmms in answer and nods. he knows.

you exhale a small laugh at that.

and he's glad you're relaxing, wants you to be as comfortable here as possible.

"these people are alright," he says casually, "as far as healthy people go."

viktor smiles a little.

another win for him.

and then he sits with you, talking and not talking and enjoying the quiet comfort if it all. and then he makes up some excuse so you don't have to keep working yet. he was well aware what it was like trying to work through the pain, waiting for the medication to kick in, and he wouldn't exactly recommend it. besides, as a rule, you were more likely to make mistakes if you were thinking through a layer of pain, and that was just plain bad planning. it made much more sense to just take a break and continue when you felt better. in fact, he was in dire need of a caramel latte and a pastry right now, do you want anything?

and after that it just... sort of falls into place. you're more relaxed around him. and the others, too, but he's the only one that really gets it. doesn’t make a whole thing out of it when you need to sit down for a moment or take a break while your pain killers kick in. he's just there.

he knows what it's like, and that feels like an invisble curtain lifted from between you and him, and it's just easy. you don't have to pretend you're doing better than you actually are and he doesn’t hide it when he's in pain, either.

most people don't see it, but there's a mutual understanding there; yeah, sometimes life sucks and sometimes you're in pain and no it's not fair that sometimes your body is falling apart and life just keeps going. you can't do all the things you want to do but you still have to show up for the other life-stuff and if you took a day off every time you felt bad you would never get anything done and it just never stops.

but sometimes there's someone who'll sit through it with you without judgement. offer a warm drink and a snack and some understanding.

[telleroftime]

Viktor x Reader where the Reader is also slavic but hasn't been separated from their culture compared to what became of Viktor. At the end of his battle against Jayce, the Machine Herald is found by Reader and their people who were visiting Pilltover before the events of the second season occurred (I can only guess what will happen in the second season of the show. In LoL lore we trust).

Viktor wakes up in an unfamiliar place. Yes he shares the accent with Reader and their people but he does not understand their language. Reader would need to teach him it but the most he can do is speak a very broken form of it. He'd be able to read the simple words and although he's very smart and unsurprisingly keen to learn, he does not enjoy how long learning a language takes or how often he messes up. Or how the Reader teases him every single time. Well, he might enjoy it.

The air is clean, different from what Zaun was like. The homes were smaller and less grand to what Pilltover was. Smaller than what other kingdoms had to offer. It was a village much more tribe-like than what the rest of the world has grown to be, a fair distance from its capitol and its muscovite style architecture. It was rural. It was home.

[thehouseofurmotha]

Hiya!

Welcome to my master-list! This is where all the fics I write can be found! As well as my request rules which are as follows <3

★¸.•☆•.¸★ 🅁🅄🄻🄴🅂 ★⡀.•☆•.★

Currently I will take requests for My Hero Academia, Yuri on Ice, and Harry Potter Marauders Era! This is very much subject to change depending on what fandoms I'm in at the time!

I will write mostly x reader but I'm also willing to do some character x character ships! I will also do poly relationships!

As of now I will not write smut, any yandere, or anything with extreme gore. This is also subject to change and I will do my best to write all requests but if something makes me uncomfortable or I feel I am not the right person to portray it I will not write it.

`��•.¸,✵°✵.｡.✰ ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕤 𝕀'𝕝𝕝 𝕨𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕖✰.｡.✵°✵,¸.•✵´

My Hero:

Bakugou Katsuki (platonic/romantic)

Aizawa Shouta (platonic/romantic)

Todoroki Shouto (platonic/romantic)

Hawks (platonic/romantic)

Todoroki Touya, Dabi (platonic/romantic)

Kaminari Denki (platonic/romantic)

Iida Tenya (platonic/romantic)

Iida Tensei (romantic/platonic)

Toshinori Yagi, Allmight (platonic)

Eri (platonic)

Togata Mirio (romantic/platonic)

Sir night eye (platonic)

Shigaraki Tomura (platonic/romantic)

Kurioguri (platonic)

Shinsou Hitoshi (platonic/romantic)

Toga Himiko (platonic/romantic)

Yuri On Ice:

Viktor Nikiforov (romantic/platonic)

Yuuri Katsuki (platonic/romantic)

Yuri Plisetsky (platonic/romantic)

Mauraders Harry Potter:

Sirius Black (platonic/romantic)

Remus Lupin (platonic/romantic)

James Potter (platonic/romantic)

Regulus Black (platonic/romantic)

¸.·✩·.¸¸.·¯⍣✩ Ⓕⓘⓒⓢ ✩⍣¯·.¸¸.·✩·.¸

My hero academia:

Bakugou Katsuki:

`✵•.¸,✵°✵.｡.✰ 𝕃𝕠𝕦𝕕 𝕓𝕝𝕠𝕟𝕕𝕖 ✰.｡.✵°✵,¸.•✵´, pt. 2, pt.3

Dating bakugo head canons

Always hot Bakugou x reader head canons

Shinsou Hitoshi:

Dating him head canons

Shinsou dating Aizawa's daughter head canons

Shinso x reader soulmate au :)

Shouto Todoroki:

Shouto who likes to spend his money on you head canons

Shouta Aizawa:

Aizawa x chronically ill student reader head cannons

Yuri on Ice:

Mauraders:

[fairy-writes]

Okay okay, hear me out of this one please; a request, Viktor has a significant other that is also pretty ill and has been ill for a while, how would that go on about? I know just how hard it is on other people that have to "deal," with someone chronically ill so would he be more understanding of it because he's also chronically ill? Would they take care of eachother?

RETURNING THE FAVOR

Reblogs and Comments are greatly appreciated!!

__________________________________________________________________________

Fandom(s): Arcane: League of Legends

Pairing(s): Viktor x Reader

Word Count: 0.8k

Genre(s)/Tag(s): Gender Neutral!Reader, Reader has cystic fibrosis

Notes: I tried my best to research cystic fibrosis, but I am bound to get something wrong, so please be patient with me!

__________________________________________________________________________

Viktor came home to your coughing. 

Deep soul-wracking coughs that made you hunch over and gasp for breath. 

The kind that brings tears to your eyes. 

The kind that leaves you tired and achy, and your chest hurts, and there’s nothing you can do about it. 

He sets aside his work bag and carefully toes off his shoes before using his crutch to make his way down the hall toward your shared bedroom. You initially refused to share a bedroom with him when you both moved in together. Something about your coughing keeping him up at all hours of the night. But once you discovered that the coughing kept him up regardless because of his worry over you, you relented and moved your things into his bedroom. 

Viktor knocks quietly and opens the door after hearing your hoarse “come in” through coughs. 

Your lung infection must’ve come back if you’re coughing this much…

Maybe he could call your doctor and get you checked out later this week.

You’re hunched over the master bathroom toilet on your knees, spitting phlegm and holding your head in your hands as your chest heaves. He can hear you gasping from where he stands in the doorframe.

“I’m home.” He says, and you wave half-heartedly but don’t look up as another bout of coughing hits you. His already present frown deepens, and he leaves your side for a moment to get your medication and various other things to try and help loosen the mucus in your chest. 

He comes back with your breathing apparatus and medication. By then, you’re leaning against the wall, head tilted back, chest inhaling as deeply as your condition would allow. You open your eyes when you hear his crutch thumping against the floor of your apartment. A weak smile crosses your lips when you see what he’s holding. 

Viktor sets his crutch aside and carefully lowers himself to the ground, stretching his bad leg out in front of him. He can see you sag in relief as he carefully administers the medication via breathing apparatus. And that makes him sag in relief. 

“Feeling better?” He asks more than an hour later as you stand over a steaming, bubbling pot of water. The steam is supposed to help thin the mucus building in your chest and allow you to cough it up more easily. It was something your doctor recommended that you figured you’d try. You shrug,

“As good as I can be, I suppose.” You say weakly and smile at him when he puts a mug of tea next to you on the counter.

Taking a break from the steam, you press a kiss to his cheek. His brain stalls, and he stares. Seeing this, you elaborate. 

“You’re too good to me.” You wheeze, and he rolls his eyes but smiles nonetheless. 

“You do the same for me. I’m just returning the favor.”

You wake up to Viktor’s deep wheezing. 

It was one of the upsides to sharing a bedroom with your lover. You would always know when he was having issues. Because you knew he would never bother you otherwise. 

Dreamland slowly dissipates, and you are brought to the world of the living. Viktor is hunched over the side of the bed; hands fisted in the bedsheets as he tries to take a deep breath. So far, all he can manage is pathetic little gasps. 

So you slip out of bed silently and leave for the kitchen before coming around to his side of the bed. He jumps when you put a hand on his shoulder and sit at his side. You press a warm washcloth to his mouth for him to breathe in the moisture. It had worked marginally for you, so you hoped it would work better for him. 

He accepts the rag gratefully and breathes in the moisture and steam. 

“Look at us. We’re a bunch of sorry messes, aren’t we?” You say, and he lets out a raspy chuckle. He isn’t wearing a shirt, so you retrieve the chest rub from the bathroom and start massaging it into his back and chest. It sometimes helps you, but it helps him more often than not. 

As soon as his breathing eases, he lies back in bed with you and holds your hand. You would typically sleep with your head on his chest, but seeing as you just put chest rub on it, you didn’t want it on your face. So, holding his hand, it was. 

“Why do you put up with me?” He asks as you are slowly dozing off to sleep. You give him a look but answer nonetheless.

“Why do you put up with me?” You retort, and he looks over from where he had been watching the stars out the window.

“Because I love you.” He says easily, and you grin,

“There’s your answer.” 

[sincerely-a-frustrated-writer]

SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

some of y’all have never experienced chronic pain and it shows

[exhaustedrebel05]

Whatever the weather

Arcane Viktor x Fem! Reader

a/n: Hi, so this is the first time I post something that I wrote, I hope you like it.

I do not own anything here except the product of my creativity.

⚠️Warnings⚠️: mentioned feelings of despair, chronic illness, fluff, new fanfic writer who wrote this on a whim, and possible bad punctuation.

Tell me if I forgot something pls

Summary: You bring food to Viktor in the lab and end up having a moment.

Definitions: Zaya means "little bunny" in Russian. At least, that is what Google told me.

And here we go...

The hallways of the Academy echoed with your footsteps as you made your way to Viktor and Jayce's lab. Well, more Viktor's than Joyce's now that he was more involved in the political side of progress.

Viktor tried to act like the absence of his friend and fellow Hex tech founder didn't bother him, but you knew that deep down it did. You could see it in the way he was returning to old habits of believing he had to do everything on his own.

Even though he did not, and was not on his own. Especially with his declining health. It is not the best idea to leave him alone for hours on end.

You all understood that it was better if they had a say in the decisions regarding Hex tech's future. In order to ensure that it is safe from ending up in the wrong hands. Hands that would use it to destroy lives instead of improving them.

Nonetheless, it left much of the work for Viktor to go through alone, but he never complained. Your beloved is a man racing against time and fate.

Trying to complete and discover as much as his delicate body allows him to. Powering through all of the equations and push backs that came his way.

However, he could only do so much running on maybe four hours of sleep and the academy's cafeteria food. Which is why you were here, at his lab's door, fully expecting to see him hunched over his current project. Fully focused. Tuning out all of the world in order to improve it.

Knowing this, you don't even bother knocking on the large ancient doors; entering the lab filled with papers and project pieces scattered in a sort of organized chaos throughout the room. And in the back of said chaos is Viktor, sitting at his desk exactly as you imagined.

As you walk towards him, you decide to stand beside him and attempt to make your presence known without giving him a heart attack.

Like you had nearly done that one time.

You swear that man nearly jumped six feet from his chair when you placed a kiss on his cheek. Thinking that he had heard you come in.

No response...

With a gentle sigh, you lean down towards him and call his name in a sing-song voice. Hoping to bring him back to your plane of existence.

You reach out slowly, twinkling your fingers in front of him. He takes notice, chuckling as your fingers gently tap on the side of his face - then his nose.

"Hello love," He says, looking up to you with those golden orbs that make your knees weak. He sets down his work and kisses your hand.

"Hi, care for a break?" You ask, showing him the container of home cooked food you had brought him. He turns his chair to face you completely. His focus filled expression turned into delight.

"Hmmm, I suppose I could indulge." He answers, raising a mischievous eyebrow reaching out to take the food.

You move the container slightly out of his reach. Eyes trained on his expression of confusion that turns into acceptance of your challenge.

"Oh, that's how it is?" He asks, amusement apparent in his voice and expression.

"How what is?" You reply nonchalantly as possible, trying to keep a smile from spreading across your face.

The amusement filled amber eyes became daring as a beat of energy filled silence passed between you both. You were not protected from what came next.

Slender hands find their way to your waist and tickle you with no mercy. You squeal and try to move away, but you are held in place.

"Nah ah ah! Zaya, you are not getting away from me that easily!" He states as he attacks you with another wave of tickles.

"I surrender…I surrender!" You gasp, breathless from your laughter.

He hums satisfied with his victory and pulls you close, looking up into your eyes from his seated position.

Your cheeks are flushed from his little attack, and your eyes are bright from your laughter. The moment eases his mind and body. He wishes the two of you could stay here, like this, forever.

His life is not easy. At times, the pain is too much for his body, and he wants nothing more than for it to stop. To find peace and freedom from his all too delicate state.

But then who will finish all the work?

Understand all of his notes and research?

Progress doesn't happen on its own, and Jayce has his hands full with his new role.

Then there was you…

He never expected anyone to have a romantic interest in him, much less knowing that his time may no- would be limited. That in the end, you would be left all alone...

That is what troubled him the most.

You told him you would cross that bridge when you get there. That you understood what it meant to love him; and he was loved nonetheless.

It wasn't always easy, but that is what it means to love someone. It is standing beside them when times are at their worst. When they are at their worst.

Being there to help them back on their feet and facing the challenge together. He also knew how fortunate he was to have what so many others only dreamed about.

You place a hand on his cheek and brush the wild tousled hair out of his face with the other. Bringing him back from his thoughts, grounding him to the present.

"Hey, come back to me." Your voice is as soft as your expression. Eyes gazing lovingly into his own, which were equally enamored.

He gently tugs your arms, signaling for you to come closer.

"I am here."

His eyes never leave yours as he brings you in for a passionate kiss. He doesn't know what the future holds, but he knows you both will cross that bridge when you get there.

[arcane-and-back-pain]

Arcane Fic Recs

Pill Bottles by @/linesfromzaun on tumblr

Reader x Silco

chronically ill reader

Signed, Viktor by @/buttermynutter on tumblr

Reader x Viktor

a story told through letters, happy ending

[viktorybell]

Sick Days

Viktor x GN!Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

A/N: this is an extreme niche i’ve written myself into here. i wrote this with a chronically ill reader in mind, but it could honestly be for any kind of reoccurring pain like cramps, etc. it’s all fluff, don’t worry.

“And how is it going in here?” Viktor asks, poking his head into your dorm room, far past the point of needing to knock before coming in.

You groaned obnoxiously, rolling over and turning your back to the door, taking the massive mountain of blankets along with you.

“That good, eh?” Viktor hummed from somewhere behind you as he came further into the room, his cane making muffled taps against the worn down carpet from a hundred students before you. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

“Hurry up on you and wonder boy’s magical breakthrough in there and figure out a way to use it for curing cramps,” You mumbled into your pillow, wiggling over a smidge as Viktor sat down on the edge of your bed. 

“Ah, yes. Unfortunately no groundbreaking discoveries as of the last hour I’ve been in the lab,” Viktor mock sighs, leaning back against you. “I do hope you’ll forgive me.”

“No, it’s fine, Viktor. Just leave me here to suffer!” You sigh, dramatically draping and arm over your eyes. “Ancient glowing gemstones that can power a whole city and you two can’t even conjure up a magical heating pad, for crying outl-ow!” Lowering your arm, you glare at Viktor who was rolling his eyes after he had reached down to flick your nose.

“Brat.”

“And you? How are you doing today?” You muttered, finally rolling back over to face Viktor, stomach twinging in pain as you do.

Viktor took the topic change in stride, as he always did. It was one of the reasons the two of you connected in the way you did as quickly as you did, he was observant. Observant enough to notice you wince in pain. He reached out to brush a few errant locks of hair from your eyes, a furrow in his brow.

“Luckily for me, it’s a good day,” He hummed, raising his cane a bit for you to see. “I know you were mostly joking about the…magical heating pad, as it were, but would you like me to go get the one you already own?”

Lifting the edge of the blankets up with an arm, you reveal the exact electric blanket he’d been speaking of, already cranked up and laid out across your midsection.

“One step ahead of you, doll,” you hum, keeping the blankets lifted with one arm while you pat the empty space beside you with the other. “Are you sure you’re feeling alright? Maybe you should come back to bed, just in case.”

Viktor rolled his eyes, yet again, at your antics, but nonetheless started toeing his shoes off. As much as the man was a workaholic, he could tell by now when you were struggling. You’d slept alone in your dorm last night, for one. Something that rarely ever happens nowadays. Even if Viktor was off working in the lab until the sun rose, you found yourself sneaking into his room to wrap yourself in blankets that smell like him. Last night though, you had sequestered yourself away in your much smaller dorm, staggering different pain meds and trying to ignore the alternating dull aches and sharp pains stabbing through your body. It made it near impossible to get comfortable. Hence the veritable mountain of pillows and blankets stacked on top of your bed.

He set his cane to rest against your bedside table, rattling the pill bottles lined up within arms reach, and slipped under the covers beside you. It was an instant rush of comfort, getting to wrap an arm around his waist and tug him in close, your face burying in his neck as he shifts to get comfortable. Viktor wraps an arm around your shoulders, drawing circles on your back as he lets you wriggle in as close as you can.

“I’m sorry there isn’t more I can do for you, love,” Viktor mumbles into the top of your head, reaching up to gently trace along the back of your neck.

“It’s fine, Viktor, I know you go through so much worse even on good days, I’m sorry I-”

“Quiet. There’s no sense in comparing,” Viktor chides quietly as he guides your face from his neck so he can look you in the eye. It was something he did when he was trying to drive a point home, and his intense gaze never failed to make you squirm. “You don’t have to be in complete, world-ending agony to deserve comfort, you know that, right?”

You sigh, knowing if the roles were reversed you’d agree wholeheartedly. It was much easier said than done, accepting that you’re allowed to be vulnerable in front of other people. Viktor certainly made it easier, the longer you’d known him the more walls you let down. Just a couple months ago you would have played it off. Pasting on a grin and forcing yourself into the lab to manage what you could before coming up with some lame excuse, that neither Jayce or Viktor believed, and disappearing for the rest of the day. The pain was bad enough on its own, but the isolation only added another layer of awful.

It hadn’t taken long for Viktor to catch on, though. Again, he was incredibly observant. Forever a scientist at heart. Besides, he’d recognized the signs of your pain easily, no matter how hard you tried to hide it. He hadn’t mentioned it directly, but he’d taken to recognizing when you were in the middle of a flare up and got in the habit of ushering you out of the lab, insisting he and Jayce were more than capable. That, and a few lighthearted comments on how you hardly got any work done anyways when you were too focused on keeping a straight face.

You concede, “I know. You’re right.”

“Aren’t I always?” Viktor jokes back, making you roll your eyes and the rest of your body roll over with them.

“Nevermind, I feel fine. Get out of my bed,” You huff as Viktor chuckles from behind you. 

Viktor sinks down further into the bed, ignoring your half-hearted protests. His chest flush to your back and his hand gently pressing the electric blanket into your stomach. You hum happily and wiggle back further into his embrace, completely forgetting you were supposed to be ‘mad’ at him. Surrounded by soft blankets and a comforting warmth, combined with the pain killers that were finally starting to kick in, you could feel yourself starting to nod off.

It was after about twenty minutes of comfortable silence when Viktor spoke up again. Softly, like he didn’t want to shatter the bubble of momentary peace that the two of you had found yourselves in, “I’m afraid I’ll have to return to the lab soon…”

You couldn’t necessarily say you were surprised, honestly touched that he’d managed to drag himself away from his work for the half an hour that he had, but it was still depressing news. Covering his arm with yours, you intertwined your fingers with the hand covering your stomach. He had inventor’s hands, you thought to yourself. With long, delicate fingers suitable for something graceful like playing piano. Or something with finesse like piecing together and pulling apart intricate HexTech, like he often spent his days doing. You were reluctant to let those hands go.

“Can’t the future just wait for another hour?” You mutter softly, only half joking.

Viktor gently noses at the back of your neck, leaving a trail of light kisses, “Well, maybe the future can wait. At least until you fall asleep.”

Grinning sleepily, you turn just enough to meet Viktor’s lips in a sweet kiss before burrowing back into your pillow.

It took mere minutes for you to fall asleep, and it felt like just a few minutes later you were waking back up. Your electric blanket had long since fallen asleep, the timer automatically shutting off so you didn’t set yourself on fire. It was almost cold, despite all the blankets, what with the heat off and Viktor long gone. You sighed as a sharp cramp made you twitch, it’s probably what had woken you up, it was probably time to take more meds. 

You rolled over, reaching to swipe the bottle of motrin off your bedside table, when you caught sight of the time. It’d been about two hours, not bad. Next to the alarm clock was a glass of water, the last of the ice in it melting down, a sleeve of crackers, and a note.

Grinning almost giddily, you momentarily ditched your current task to swipe the note off the nightstand, rolling on your back to read it.

The future calls, my dearest. I’ll be back later with dinner. Get some rest and feel better soon.

-Viktor

You reread the note about three more times while you got yourself upright, leaned back against your headboard as you washed down pain killers with the water Viktor had thought to bring you before returning to work. It was a small gesture, but one greatly appreciated, seeing as walking occasionally wasn’t an option during flare-ups.

After your nap, though, you weren’t feeling too awful beyond a persistent dull ache. Glancing mischievously down at Viktor’s note, you wondered to yourself.

There was a couch in Viktor and Jayce’s lab, wasn’t there? His note didn’t specify exactly where you had to rest…

[mediocrewallflow3r]

SFW Headcanons for Readers w/ Chronic Pain - Viktor/Reader

♥ On particularly high-level pain days, Vik will lay on his back with you on your shared bed- bouncing ideas back and forth with you about the arcane ♥ You both have a heating pad that stays permanently in the middle of your shared bed ♥ Yes, you have in fact fought over the last painkillers before at 2 am on a Tuesday ♥ Scorching hot baths are a must ♥ Muscle-relaxing salts are a common item in your home ♥ Vik despises lavender- he’s allergic to it (Ironic, right?) and finds it infuriating that he’s allergic to the common relaxing agent. ♥ Every morning, before Vik leaves to the lab- he puts on a kettle of rose tea for you both ♥ Mostly savory food is eaten in your household (other than sweet milk) because of the fact that sugar increases pain ♥ On the nights you can’t stay still due to joint pain, Viktor gently lays on top of you to still your muscle tremors and massages your scalp into you drift off ♥ Vik is always yelling at you to put shoes on in the house ♥ “It’s simply a fact! If you continue walking around barefoot on hardwood floors, you’re going to develop even more joint problems!” ♥ Near the end of your shared evening routine, you and Vik gently massage medicinal cream onto each other’s joints

[cheeriecherry]

The Lonely [Chapter One]

Pairing: Viktor x fem!Reader Warnings: vampirism, reader being dramatic af Fandom: Arcane Proofread: no lol

Summary: You’re old, you’re tired, you’re immortal, and life sucks. Until one day, a human guy breaks into your castle and becomes your house-mate.

~~~Chapter One~~~

You remain by your unexpected guests’ side throughout the night. From behind your book, you watch him as he tosses and turns and tries to get comfortable in his sleep.

Even now that he’s warm and dry and settled down somewhere soft, he doesn’t exactly look…healthy. At first, you’d thought the darkness around his eyes had been minor, but now that his skin has gotten some colour back, the shadows have darkened. It concerns you, even if only slightly.

What bothers you more is the way his lungs rattle slightly with every breath. The average person might not be able to hear a thing, but with your enhanced senses, you can hear the crackling of buildup in his chest. 

Your first guess was an infection; pneumonia, perhaps, or bronchitis. But you’d taken his temperature out of curiosity, and it had been normal. No sign of his body trying to fight anything. It made you wonder if there wasn’t something more going on with him, a chronic illness or something more deadly.

Quietly, you tuck the blankets back up around him, momentarily debating if you should add another, but you wouldn’t want to suffocate the poor man. So you stop fussing over him and leave him be, plopping down in your chaise and returning to your book.

~~~

You’re about half way through the novel when you hear his heart rate beginning to pick up. Your gaze flicks to him for a couple moments, and you also notice his breathing becoming shallower.

You set your book down and lean forward a bit, observing him quietly while his body wakes up. It’s been so long since you’ve properly been around a human, you’d almost forgotten how many small details their simple existence held. Tiny fidgets and movements, ever-moving eyes and a primal dislike of silence.

You’re so lost in thought while you watch him that you almost miss his lids fluttering open and his gaze casting around the room. Thankfully, he stirs rather loudly and stretches his limbs with a sigh.

You lean forward a little more, and his eyes finally settle on you. Golden irises with flecks of brown, darkening some when his pupils dilate as he focuses on you. He swallows thickly, clearing his throat while he sits up on the bed.

“I…take it I made it to the manor, then? The one on the moor?” he asks, voice coarse with sleep.

You tilt your head slightly, and nod.

“Ah…good. That’s good,” he continues. “I honestly wasn’t sure I would be able to make the hike, and no one seemed to want to drop me off at your door -assuming of course, that you- do you live here?”

He’s unsure, both in his tone and his movements; wringing his hands without even realizing.

Again, you nod.

He huffs a single laugh, reclining back onto his elbows. “You’re not the talkative type, I presume?” he asks, pausing for a moment to stretch his back, and you wince when several pops come from his spine.

“That’s fine,” he tells you, “I’m…not particularly inclined to socialize, either.”

You both sit in silence for several minutes, and you watch as he becomes more and more agitated, picking at his cuticles and running his hands through his hair, fiddling with the cuffs of his sleeves and rolling the buttons of his shirt around.

Finally, you ask him, “Why did you come here?”

He looks somewhat relieved that you’ve spoken, though whether it’s intentional or not, you don’t know.

“I’ve been looking for you,” he says plainly, and you narrow your eyes.

He seems to notice the change in your demeanor, and he rushes to correct himself, “Not you specifically. Just one of your kind. This place was the last on my list, of where I could possibly find one.”

“My kind?” you keep your tone neutral.

“You know…? Vampires?”

You’re unable to contain your disdainful snort, and you flop back in your chaise to a much more comfortable position.

“I don’t know who you are,” you say, voice sharp, “but vampires aren’t real.”

He looks wholly unconvinced.

“I knew a vampire, as a boy. He took me in for a while, taught me a lot.”

You repeat yourself, “Vampires don’t exist,” and the man sighs deeply.

“Red eyes, fangs, otherworldly beauty. Not to mention, your clothing is…what, a century old? Maybe two?” You scowl. “Four, actually. But I’ve never heard of women from the 1600s wearing pants.” “The, ah, corset, though? And the puffy sleeves?”

Your scowl worsens, and he finally seems to notice the harshness of your gaze.

“I went through all the trouble of dragging you up here,” you hiss, “You, an intruder, and you have the audacity to nitpick my clothing choices?”

Worry flashes across his face. “I, ah…”

“As it so happens, I enjoy history and I like making things. I have recreations of styles from every era, and-”

“I apologize,” he interrupts, “I apologize, alright? It wasn’t my intention to make you feel like I was making fun, I was only trying to point something out; as a way of saying that I know you’re a vampire, and not just some hermit who lives in a wayward castle by herself.”

You stare at him for a long while, dissecting his words and expressions. He seemed earnest enough, even if tactless about it. This wasn’t a man who believed in stories and legends, rather, his actions told you that he knew for a fact your kind existed. He was a man who had known vampires, as he’d said he had.

“Why did you come looking for me?” you finally wonder, releasing some of the tension in your shoulders.

He thinks for a moment, and avoids your gaze when he says, “I have run out of options.”

“More specific,” you order.

Now it’s his turn to frown, and you can almost see the nonexistent quills standing up on his neck.

“Surely,” he grumbles, “you have noticed I’m not in the best of health? I’ve been here for hours, presumably, and you’ve likely been watching me like a hawk-”

“I have not!” you protest.

He fixes you with a disbelieving stare.

“...maybe a little,” you mumble.

“Regardless,” he continues, “you’ve had the time to tell I’m not…well. All the others could see it in my face, smell it in my blood, hear the way my heart beats so weakly.”

You shift your weight and lean back in your seat, gracefully crossing one leg over the other. You know now what he wants.

“You want me to turn you,” you say, and it’s not a question.

“Yes.”

“At least you’re honest about it.”

He doesn’t say anything while you ponder, leaving you some moments to think and come to a decision. You could turn him. It would be as easy as breathing, to deliver the specific bite meant for creating more vampires. As soon as your venom was in his body, his condition would improve; he’d heal. It would take a couple days, but…

…but could you live with yourself, knowing you damned an innocent person to an eternity of life? Sure, he was most likely scared of dying, as most humans were, but…to have such an option? And then to be the one to take that away from him? 

“You don’t know what you’re asking for,” you tell him.

“I do,” he insists, “I know what I want, what I need- please!”

You sigh.

“I won’t turn you,” you say, and his face falls.

“Why?” 

“Because one day, when you tire of the world, when you have seen all you want to, when you have watched all you hold dear disappear, and witnessed the fall of humanity itself…you will persist. Death is a gift, and I will not be the one to take it from you.”

“I’m not ready to die-”

“No one ever is,” your tone is pained, “but when you are? When you are, it hurts worse than knowing you’ll be gone too soon. And that feeling never goes away. Ever.”

You can see the anger in his eyes, the despair, and hurt, and fear.

“Just because you crave death,” he says, “does not mean I will. For years, modern medicine has failed me. There is no cure for my affliction, and no way to stop it from killing me. I have tried everything, and nothing has worked. And now I am out of time.”

The pain in his voice is almost enough to make you change your mind. Almost enough to make you walk over to him and sink your teeth into his throat. But your own despair wins, as it has for years, pushing away the desire to help him and damn him to a life such as yours.

“I’m sorry. I won’t turn you.”

His shoulders fall.

“However,” you continue. “The trek back to town is…not easy. Especially at this time of year, when the weather is harsh and the land is choppy. If I’m being honest, I don’t think you’d make it back. If you want, you can stay here until the moor freezes, and then I’ll take you back myself.”

He doesn’t utter a sound, at first. You can see the gears turning in his head, working to formulate some kind of plan. You vow to remain steadfast if he chooses to stay, vow to keep your distance and provide him with distractions and entertainment that don’t involve getting too close.

“Alright,” he agrees. “How long until the ground is frozen?”

“Ah, um…” you stand for a moment, and wander over to the window to take a look. “The air is cold, but the soil hasn’t solidified yet, so…maybe six weeks? Eight at most, I think.”

He nods, “That sounds alright.”

All of a sudden, he seems to become more aware of his surroundings, and he rushes to rid himself of the blankets you’d put on him. You watch in bemusement as he presumably searches around for his cane, which was leaning on the table beside him.

“I won’t be taking up room, will I?” he asks, finally zeroing in on the object, and he reaches for it.

Your mood shifts ever so slightly, and you offer him a tired smile. “No,” you say, “If anything, it’ll give me an excuse to tidy up a bit. I uh…if you want, I can show you around? You can pick a room, if you’d like, and a tour might keep you from getting lost.”

He stands, slightly shaky from the hours prior, but maintains his balance.

“Surely this place isn’t that big?”

You walk over and come to a stop at his side. “No, but there are a lot of turns and hidden rooms. And I would hear you well enough from anywhere if you were to shout, but I’d rather avoid having to fetch you from behind a wall somewhere, or fish you out from the basement.”

“There’s a basement?” “Yes, though it’s mostly flooded- I haven’t been down there since eighteen fifty seven.”

You lead him out of the room slowly, and begin showing him around his new home.

[gingersforeverbox]

GingersForeverBox: Arcane Masterlist

Filed in oldest to newest order:

Soft mornings in Zaun

Random relationship headcanons with some Arcane charters (Singed, Sevika, Silco, Viktor, & Jayce)

Silpups and debates

Even more slipups and debates

Poly!JayVik x reader with chronic illnesses/ autoimmune issues

Nightmares and domesticity

Lost in translation

Vi, Caitlyn, and Jinx with an S/O who has a Eula personality from Geshin Impact

Kiss headcanons with Arcane characters (Singed and Viktor):

Headcanons on what I imagine being in a poly relationship with Silco and Sevika would be like (SFW)

Headcanons on what I imagine being in a poly relationship with Silco and Sevika would be like (N-SFW)

Jayce with a cuddly S/O

[doctorho]

masterlist

If you knew what the bluebirds sing (Royal!Viktor x gender neutral reader) Viktor is a king crowned a bit too young and without choice. He has insomnia, a troubled kingdom, a distaste for doing things by the book and a life where everything is predetermined for him. The reader is a servant that isn’t the biggest fan of following rules, either.

Distractions (Viktor x f!reader, friends to lovers) Viktor is distracted before an event, and for once it isn't because of science.

Distractions pt. 2 (The distraction continues and gets a bit spicy)

Cold nights, warm hearts (Viktor x gender neutral reader, 1.8k words, fluff) you're a lab assistant at hextech. viktor tends to spend long nights at the lab, and after working with him for a while, so do you. and maybe it's not just work after a while. maybe it's nice and comfortable and maybe it just works.

Behind these words (Viktor x gender neutral reader) inspired by this series by @buttermynutter ! this is what, in my head, happens behind those letters. it's shenanigans! it's yearning! it's new beginnings! it's finding out life can be a lot more than you thought!

Neon lights (Viktor x gender neutral reader, modern no magic au, everyone is an academy student because i said so.) The last exams of the season are over in the Academy, and people are celebrating. Jayce, Mel and Viktor have a victorious pub quiz team, and after your classmates stand you up, you join them. And end up spending the night sitting in Viktor's lap.

Neon lights pt. 2 (The quiz ends, the night continues)

Neon lights pt. 3 (The night ends...in Viktor's bed.)

New things, real things (Viktor x gender neutral reader. it's the midwinter gala at the academy, and Viktor has plans.)

Holy Darkness (Vampire!Viktor x gender neutral reader) the reader has a quiet little life. working at a book shop, feeding stray cats, you know how it is. It's fine, but it's boring. And...there might be a vampire living in the abandoned library at the edge of town. And they might just both be lonely.

Holy Darkness pt. 2

scribbles (aka just short fics, thoughts, moments)

og vampire viktor thoughts vampire viktor thoughts more vampire viktor thoughts fae au? plus (additional thoughts) viktor with a plus sized reader - whom he adores jayce being a sweet lil nerd who likes to make stuff for the people he cares about? crystal edition! musings about viktor & holidays chaotic college student viktor work safety as a love language (the reader is from the undercity and gets invited to attend the piltover academy, viktor helps them adjust)

viktor with a chronically ill reader

[cheeriecherrymain]

The Lonely [Chapter One]

Pairing: Viktor x fem!Reader Warnings: vampirism, reader being dramatic af Fandom: Arcane Proofread: no lol

Summary: You’re old, you’re tired, you’re immortal, and life sucks. Until one day, a human guy breaks into your castle and becomes your house-mate.

~~~Chapter One~~~

You remain by your unexpected guests’ side throughout the night. From behind your book, you watch him as he tosses and turns and tries to get comfortable in his sleep.

Even now that he’s warm and dry and settled down somewhere soft, he doesn’t exactly look…healthy. At first, you’d thought the darkness around his eyes had been minor, but now that his skin has gotten some colour back, the shadows have darkened. It concerns you, even if only slightly.

What bothers you more is the way his lungs rattle slightly with every breath. The average person might not be able to hear a thing, but with your enhanced senses, you can hear the crackling of buildup in his chest.

Your first guess was an infection; pneumonia, perhaps, or bronchitis. But you’d taken his temperature out of curiosity, and it had been normal. No sign of his body trying to fight anything. It made you wonder if there wasn’t something more going on with him, a chronic illness or something more deadly.

Quietly, you tuck the blankets back up around him, momentarily debating if you should add another, but you wouldn’t want to suffocate the poor man. So you stop fussing over him and leave him be, plopping down in your chaise and returning to your book.

~~~

You’re about half way through the novel when you hear his heart rate beginning to pick up. Your gaze flicks to him for a couple moments, and you also notice his breathing becoming shallower.

You set your book down and lean forward a bit, observing him quietly while his body wakes up. It’s been so long since you’ve properly been around a human, you’d almost forgotten how many small details their simple existence held. Tiny fidgets and movements, ever-moving eyes and a primal dislike of silence.

You’re so lost in thought while you watch him that you almost miss his lids fluttering open and his gaze casting around the room. Thankfully, he stirs rather loudly and stretches his limbs with a sigh.

You lean forward a little more, and his eyes finally settle on you. Golden irises with flecks of brown, darkening some when his pupils dilate as he focuses on you. He swallows thickly, clearing his throat while he sits up on the bed.

“I…take it I made it to the manor, then? The one on the moor?” he asks, voice coarse with sleep.

You tilt your head slightly, and nod.

“Ah…good. That’s good,” he continues. “I honestly wasn’t sure I would be able to make the hike, and no one seemed to want to drop me off at your door -assuming of course, that you- do you live here?”

He’s unsure, both in his tone and his movements; wringing his hands without even realizing.

Again, you nod.

He huffs a single laugh, reclining back onto his elbows. “You’re not the talkative type, I presume?” he asks, pausing for a moment to stretch his back, and you wince when several pops come from his spine.

“That’s fine,” he tells you, “I’m…not particularly inclined to socialize, either.”

You both sit in silence for several minutes, and you watch as he becomes more and more agitated, picking at his cuticles and running his hands through his hair, fiddling with the cuffs of his sleeves and rolling the buttons of his shirt around.

Finally, you ask him, “Why did you come here?”

He looks somewhat relieved that you’ve spoken, though whether it’s intentional or not, you don’t know.

“I’ve been looking for you,” he says plainly, and you narrow your eyes.

He seems to notice the change in your demeanor, and he rushes to correct himself, “Not you specifically. Just one of your kind. This place was the last on my list, of where I could possibly find one.”

“My kind?” you keep your tone neutral.

“You know…? Vampires?”

You’re unable to contain your disdainful snort, and you flop back in your chaise to a much more comfortable position.

“I don’t know who you are,” you say, voice sharp, “but vampires aren’t real.”

He looks wholly unconvinced.

“I knew a vampire, as a boy. He took me in for a while, taught me a lot.”

You repeat yourself, “Vampires don’t exist,” and the man sighs deeply.

“Red eyes, fangs, otherworldly beauty. Not to mention, your clothing is…what, a century old? Maybe two?” You scowl. “Four, actually. But I’ve never heard of women from the 1600s wearing pants.” “The, ah, corset, though? And the puffy sleeves?”

Your scowl worsens, and he finally seems to notice the harshness of your gaze.

“I went through all the trouble of dragging you up here,” you hiss, “You, an intruder, and you have the audacity to nitpick my clothing choices?”

Worry flashes across his face. “I, ah…”

“As it so happens, I enjoy history and I like making things. I have recreations of styles from every era, and-”

“I apologize,” he interrupts, “I apologize, alright? It wasn’t my intention to make you feel like I was making fun, I was only trying to point something out; as a way of saying that I know you’re a vampire, and not just some hermit who lives in a wayward castle by herself.”

You stare at him for a long while, dissecting his words and expressions. He seemed earnest enough, even if tactless about it. This wasn’t a man who believed in stories and legends, rather, his actions told you that he knew for a fact your kind existed. He was a man who had known vampires, as he’d said he had.

“Why did you come looking for me?” you finally wonder, releasing some of the tension in your shoulders.

He thinks for a moment, and avoids your gaze when he says, “I have run out of options.”

“More specific,” you order.

Now it’s his turn to frown, and you can almost see the nonexistent quills standing up on his neck.

“Surely,” he grumbles, “you have noticed I’m not in the best of health? I’ve been here for hours, presumably, and you’ve likely been watching me like a hawk-”

“I have not!” you protest.

He fixes you with a disbelieving stare.

“…maybe a little,” you mumble.

“Regardless,” he continues, “you’ve had the time to tell I’m not…well. All the others could see it in my face, smell it in my blood, hear the way my heart beats so weakly.”

You shift your weight and lean back in your seat, gracefully crossing one leg over the other. You know now what he wants.

“You want me to turn you,” you say, and it’s not a question.

“Yes.”

“At least you’re honest about it.”

He doesn’t say anything while you ponder, leaving you some moments to think and come to a decision. You could turn him. It would be as easy as breathing, to deliver the specific bite meant for creating more vampires. As soon as your venom was in his body, his condition would improve; he’d heal. It would take a couple days, but…

…but could you live with yourself, knowing you damned an innocent person to an eternity of life? Sure, he was most likely scared of dying, as most humans were, but…to have such an option? And then to be the one to take that away from him?

“You don’t know what you’re asking for,” you tell him.

“I do,” he insists, “I know what I want, what I need- please!”

You sigh.

“I won’t turn you,” you say, and his face falls.

“Why?”

“Because one day, when you tire of the world, when you have seen all you want to, when you have watched all you hold dear disappear, and witnessed the fall of humanity itself…you will persist. Death is a gift, and I will not be the one to take it from you.”

“I’m not ready to die-”

“No one ever is,” your tone is pained, “but when you are? When you are, it hurts worse than knowing you’ll be gone too soon. And that feeling never goes away. Ever.”

You can see the anger in his eyes, the despair, and hurt, and fear.

“Just because you crave death,” he says, “does not mean I will. For years, modern medicine has failed me. There is no cure for my affliction, and no way to stop it from killing me. I have tried everything, and nothing has worked. And now I am out of time.”

The pain in his voice is almost enough to make you change your mind. Almost enough to make you walk over to him and sink your teeth into his throat. But your own despair wins, as it has for years, pushing away the desire to help him and damn him to a life such as yours.

“I’m sorry. I won’t turn you.”

His shoulders fall.

“However,” you continue. “The trek back to town is…not easy. Especially at this time of year, when the weather is harsh and the land is choppy. If I’m being honest, I don’t think you’d make it back. If you want, you can stay here until the moor freezes, and then I’ll take you back myself.”

He doesn’t utter a sound, at first. You can see the gears turning in his head, working to formulate some kind of plan. You vow to remain steadfast if he chooses to stay, vow to keep your distance and provide him with distractions and entertainment that don’t involve getting too close.

“Alright,” he agrees. “How long until the ground is frozen?”

“Ah, um…” you stand for a moment, and wander over to the window to take a look. “The air is cold, but the soil hasn’t solidified yet, so…maybe six weeks? Eight at most, I think.”

He nods, “That sounds alright.”

All of a sudden, he seems to become more aware of his surroundings, and he rushes to rid himself of the blankets you’d put on him. You watch in bemusement as he presumably searches around for his cane, which was leaning on the table beside him.

“I won’t be taking up room, will I?” he asks, finally zeroing in on the object, and he reaches for it.

Your mood shifts ever so slightly, and you offer him a tired smile. “No,” you say, “If anything, it’ll give me an excuse to tidy up a bit. I uh…if you want, I can show you around? You can pick a room, if you’d like, and a tour might keep you from getting lost.”

He stands, slightly shaky from the hours prior, but maintains his balance.

“Surely this place isn’t that big?”

You walk over and come to a stop at his side. “No, but there are a lot of turns and hidden rooms. And I would hear you well enough from anywhere if you were to shout, but I’d rather avoid having to fetch you from behind a wall somewhere, or fish you out from the basement.”

“There’s a basement?” “Yes, though it’s mostly flooded- I haven’t been down there since eighteen fifty seven.”

You lead him out of the room slowly, and begin showing him around his new home.

[smol-lydia]

For anyone wondering, there will be a part 3 for my Viktor x reader fic, I also have another Viktor/reader oneshot in the works and a bunch of other WIPs for my rarepair I just got my ass kicked by my Covid booster this weekend and next weekend I’m going to AX in full Jinx cosplay so I’ve been busyyyyy

I am chronically ill so thank u for ur patience loves

[doctorho]

actually i'm not done. yeah, the other people you work around are nice, they're supportive, they don't tell you to just try yoga and they don't make weird comments about all the little things you sometimes let them see. the appointments, the medications, the side effects - you mention some of it to your friends sometimes and you know they'd be supportive but what they see is still just the tip of the iceberg, while you're out there carrying the entire weight of the whole thing.

and it's just - yes, they'd be supportive, but they don't get it. there's so much that they don't know, because they don't see you when you're at your worst, and if they knew the full honest truth of the things you're dealing with they'd be scared. because the things you deal with on a regular basis would send a healthy person to the hospital, and you're still showing up to work because it's just another friday. and it's not that bad if you're still conscious, and it's fine, it's just another symptom, just another side effect, just another friday, so you just...deal with it quietly. sugar-coat it a little, only show them the tip of the iceberg. you don't want to scare the others, you don't want them to worry when this is just...normal for you. because they would be, they would be scared and they would be worried, any generally healthy person would be, because this wasn't how their world worked. they're not in the water under the iceberg with you.

but viktor is.

he gets it, he sees the weight of it all, he's right down there with you.

talking to him about these things is like speaking the same language, fluently, without having to stumble through translations like you sometimes did with other people.

and it's freeing, not having to filter yourself through the scope of what can i let show because he's already seen it all and worse. he won't flinch at the pain or the blood or the tears or the bruises, the messy honest truth of it all. he knows what it's like. and he doesn’t judge - because he knows what it's like. the knowledge of that sits somewhere right around your heart, that he knows and he understands and you don't have to hide it.

you can just...be.

thinking about viktor with a chronically ill reader. you know? we see the vision, right?

it just works.

the thing with chronic pain, illnesses, disabilities, all of that - is that you can't always see them. sometimes you can, sure, you can see the mobility aids and the not-standing-up-for-too-long and the bruising from blood draws and sometimes you can see the compression garments, the pills and inhalers and the i'm fine, i just need a moment-

but most people just don't pay attention to that. or if they do, they don't put the pieces together fast enough to figure out what's really going on under the surface. viktor does, though; he's been there, and most of the time he's way beyond hiding it. or, well, he's way beyond hiding some of it.

walking with a cane was like carrying a neon sign that said yes there is something different here. yes i can't walk the way you can. no it's not going to get better. that last part wasn't directly evident just from him using a cane, sure, but with the way his cane looked, it should've been pretty clear. He had used one practically forever and it had evolved with him, he'd made it as comfortable to use as it could be, had even made it match his uniform.

so yeah. viktor knew what it was like. he'd been the disabled kid forever, even if some of the others were never going to say it out loud. that was just a thing about him, and he knew how hard it could be to navigate something like that in an academic environment. it was hard to admit you couldn't do something, that you had to sit down, that you needed a moment. that sometimes your body was just falling apart for no particular reason and it was just another tuesday.

sometimes it was easier to sit with the pain than take medication in the middle of a meeting, knowing that someone would make a bigger deal out of it than it had to be, even if it was just raising their eyebrows meaningfully. they'd think about you differently afterwards.

he could see you push through it, and he didn't blame you, really, he did that himself, too, but - he didn't want you to hurt yourself. you hadn't been in the lab as long as he had, so he could understand you being a little cautious with how you acted and what you told people, but he didn't want you to feel like you had to put on a show for him. he was, after all, walking around with the equivalent of a light-up sign of i'm disabled, too, and he liked to think of himself as someone who wouldn't come off as judgemental about stuff like that. other stuff, sure, stupid stuff, but not that.

so when he sees you dealing with the telltale signs of being in pain, he conveniently sends jayce and the others to pick up some parts that would take a while to collect and that they wouldn't actually need until the next day. but better prepared, right? what's the harm.

and then he comes to sit next to you and sighs deeply. leans back. relaxes to the best of his abilities. asks if you're alright, and sounds like he already knows the answer.

you sigh too, shift your position, and answer with it's fine. and viktor recognizes the strain in your voice, in your posture, and he knows there's a key difference between this and i'm fine, but he'll take it. it's not what he'd like, but he'll take it.

he leans over to dig around his belongings, and then offers you a bag of candied almonds.

"if you're going to take pain killers, it's better if you eat something first," he says, and you just stare at him. "i assume you haven't taken anything yet. nothing strong enough, at least," he continues, casually, and you take a deep breath and accept the almonds.

he smiles. continues like this is totally normal. "jayce made me start carrying around some food so i could do that. for myself, i mean. but it doesn't hurt to have some snacks around either way, i suppose."

he knows he's skirting around the real topic of the conversation, but he also knows that sometimes people get uncomfortable around his bluntness, and you hadn't exactly told him you were in pain, so he'd understand it if you were a little weirded out. after all, most people didn't notice this stuff. but you haven't run away from him, and you're eating, and then you're digging around your own bag to take your medication, so he'll count this as a win.

thanks, you exhale, handing back the almonds, and he takes a handful of them himself.

"i'm fine, really," you continue, not really looking at him, "it's just hard sometimes."

he nods. it was - even if he didn't know the specifics, he knew that it was true. especially since you had been hiding it from the others. and with something like that, something the others couldn't see, the invisible step to let them see it would grow bigger and bigger with time, when they expected you to be able to do everything they did without a second thought.

he also knows you didn't mean fine in the dictionary definition sense of the word, but more in the this is normal and you don't need to worry -sense. and that's fine. he was used to functioning on different parameters than most people, so this version of fine was good enough.

my body just isn't always very reliable, you explain with a sigh, and that he knows better than well.

he hmms in answer and nods. he knows.

you exhale a small laugh at that.

and he's glad you're relaxing, wants you to be as comfortable here as possible.

"these people are alright," he says casually, "as far as healthy people go."

viktor smiles a little.

another win for him.

and then he sits with you, talking and not talking and enjoying the quiet comfort if it all. and then he makes up some excuse so you don't have to keep working yet. he was well aware what it was like trying to work through the pain, waiting for the medication to kick in, and he wouldn't exactly recommend it. besides, as a rule, you were more likely to make mistakes if you were thinking through a layer of pain, and that was just plain bad planning. it made much more sense to just take a break and continue when you felt better. in fact, he was in dire need of a caramel latte and a pastry right now, do you want anything?

and after that it just... sort of falls into place. you're more relaxed around him. and the others, too, but he's the only one that really gets it. doesn’t make a whole thing out of it when you need to sit down for a moment or take a break while your pain killers kick in. he's just there.

he knows what it's like, and that feels like an invisble curtain lifted from between you and him, and it's just easy. you don't have to pretend you're doing better than you actually are and he doesn’t hide it when he's in pain, either.

most people don't see it, but there's a mutual understanding there; yeah, sometimes life sucks and sometimes you're in pain and no it's not fair that sometimes your body is falling apart and life just keeps going. you can't do all the things you want to do but you still have to show up for the other life-stuff and if you took a day off every time you felt bad you would never get anything done and it just never stops.

but sometimes there's someone who'll sit through it with you without judgement. offer a warm drink and a snack and some understanding.