#very curious so answer

[hnbka]

also please lmk if your opinion was recently changed cause obviously sadie sink was in the cast photos and i know a lot of people were like phew this proves it

[inkskinned]

probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.

we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."

at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.

the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.

the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.

what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.

here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.

[sysig]

“It could be that the loss of her children drove the Queen deeper into her darker desires...but, I don’t believe she was fighting against them that hard before that particular tragedy. No monster does.” (Patreon)

Bonus:

Hmm, wonder what he could cover those holes with :3c

[kaibaspuppy]

pro/shippers, this poll isn't for you. sozzz

[bortmcjorts]

[ID: a drawing of pye from outer wilds, standing with her writing staff. she's wearing an orange nomai space suit without the helmet, and she has a light brown face with curly darker brown fur. end ID]

figuring out how i want to draw the nomai, so here's a pye since i am obsessed with her !!!

[lizaisdrawing]

I love the way you draw faces. They all look so.. drinkable. Like water, but it’s actually paint and I want to drink it like paint.

Omg??! I love that?? thank you sm 🤍🤍

I’ve never heard that before 😭

Twirling my hair

[oldbutchdaniel]

What does he mean by "and Daniel"? What does he mean by "throughout the years"? What does he mean by that?

(He could've been referring to the books with Daniel, but I'm choosing to think he wasn't).

Also i'd probably disagree a bit with the "kept things" definition but that's beside the point here.

THIS IS SOOOO CRAZY ACTUALLY. throughout the years ..... i'm like dropping hints that my show is going to adapt the devil's minion chapter. or just do some crazy stuff where armand follows daniel around for decades after they first meet. i guess the usual interpretation of a devil's minion chapter in tv verse is that it'd end around 1985 but rather than turning him armand erases his memories. this is huge for me personally because i've been recently imagining a world in which armand maybe does this but continues to see daniel well into the 2000s. it's kind of my take in this imagining that the last time armand sees him is just before they move to dubai but god even imagining a world where armand sees him all the time. armand saw daniel in february of 2020 (valentine's day) and the only reason he didn't see him until 2022 was borders closing. and daniel doesn't remember any of it. crazy possibilities contained within "throughout the years...."

[kelin-is-writing]

kelin may i hear more about rockstar touya \(★ω★)/

I was planning to post other headcanons before going for these, BUT I’ve got some for Rockstar!Touya that are pestering my mind these days and your asks come in the right moment, so bear with me please 🤧

࣪𖤐… ROCKSTAR!TOUYA

The first time Touya knew that he wanted to become a rockstar was in middle school, right at the age of thirteen, his influent CEO of a father was trying to mold him into a carbon copy of himself to rival Yagi Toshinori’s Enterprise. While taking a break from studies, he saw his sister watch on TV a rock concert of “Loudness” and to say Akira Takasaki is his role model is the least. That’s a true legend to him.

After “Loudness” and Akira Takasaki, he discovered “Metallica” and Kirk Hammett which made him go like “HOW??? HAVE??? I??? MISSED??? ALL??? THIS???”, scolding himself for taking so long to fall in love with the electric guitar and its sound. The next week he’s blasting full volume “The Final Countdown” by Europe inside the Todoroki Mansion like the good old stamp rock fanatic he is, getting himself scolded and grounded by Enji who is a fan of traditional Japanese music so yeah…

At one of the Todoroki family gatherings during the weekend, he was scrolling down his phone looking first of all where to take guitar lessons and second for a guitar to buy, but he knew his father would never agree to get him one. That’s when his grandfather, peeking at his grandson’s phone, butted in and asked Touya if he’s interested in music. He wasn’t sure if it was a good thing to answer that question, since he’s the father of his father, but he did and hell has it been the best thing he did!

On his fourteenth birthday, Enji’s father bought Touya his very first electric guitar, a good old Fender Stratocaster CUSTOM MADE for him. It’s snow white like his hair and has a his name engraved on the bottom left side of the guitar, while on the other side there were engraved tiger’s fangs, all in turquoise… The color of his eyes. And this has been by far Touya’s best birthday ever.

After finishing Middle School he choose to attend an Art School, taking the music classes as main classes of course; he may or not have done it to piss off and raise Enji’s blood pressure from how mad he got for choosing something different from Finances and Management. Oh his father was livid and Touya was so proud of himself for that.

He has formed a rock band, of which he’s the guitarist and vocalist, with Tenko Shimura (Bassist&Vocalist) and Shuichi Iguchi (Drummer) called “The Villains”… Are we even surprised about this name? Really? Because I am not. Tenko suggested, Iguchi supported strongly and Touya just went with it because complaining and thinking about another name was “Too much effort”. He likes it a lot but will never admit it.

At the age of nineteen, Touya owns a Fender Stratocaster (Custom Made), an Elite Stratocaster, an ST-83-80 Japan (1983) black, Lone Star Strat, IC350 black, IC50 black, ICHI00 white, Gibson SG Standard mahogany and a Jackson Pro Series DK Modern HT6 MS. He also owns four acoustic guitars for songwriting, like a Martin GPC-X1E, Martin 000-28 Modern Deluxe, Taylor GS Mini-e Rosewood SN LTD and a Taylor AD22e. Did he pay all them with Enji’s credit card? Hell yeah. Did he do it out of spite? Absolutely. Did he care about his father’s blood pressure rising even more? Not even remotely.

His favorite groups are Loudness, Metallica, Led Zeppelin, AC/DC, Europe, Scorpions, Slipknot, Three Days Grace, Green Day, Skillet, Linkin Park, The Rasmus, L’Arc-En-Ciel, UVERworld, Nirvana, Guns N’ Roses and Evanescence to list some, because there are many more he adores honestly. He isn’t a picky ear as long as the song gives him chills and inspires him, being someone who’s driven by emotions that’s what makes him likes something he hears.

Atsuhiro is their homeroom teacher, at the Art University they attend, who introduces them to Giran, a friend of his, who has an agency for new talents and after they sent him six of their songs wants to launch their very first album by August to make them debut at the “Rock In Japan Fes.”

Touya, being the emotional driven type of musician, is the one put to write the lyrics for the band’s songs and most of the times are hits, especially because his and Tenko’s voice brings to life the emotions of the lyrics in a way that it reaches the listeners right into the heart and soul.

You will never catch Touya’s fingers empty, there’s always rings decorating them and some rings are even custom made by his cousin Geten, who owns a Jewelry shop that he promotes a lot on his social media. One of his most precious rings is the one that he got made for him, with his birthstone carved in it, when he turned eighteen.

He has three earrings on his right ear: an helix, mid helix, conch and low helix. Four on his left one: two helix, a low helix and one on the lobe, plus three nostril piercings on the right side of his nose.

After “The Villains” debuts and proving his father that he could succeed through music without his help nor his name, Touya owns now a black card that he lets Fuyumi and Shoto use to their heart content.

Last, but not least, be ready to be the muse of Touya’s songs the instant he falls head over heels for you. The moment it happens everything, and I mean everything, to him becomes about you driving Tenko and Iguchi to pure exasperation.

[tathrin]

The Extremely Serious and Scientific Legolas Fandom Hair Colour Poll:

What colour hair do you picture in your head for your personal mental image of Legolas of the Woodland Realm? (Not necessarily which one you think is more or less "canonical"; rather just what you see in your head when you're reading something.)

Ideally, you can also share when and how you were first exposed to Lord of the Rings in the tags or reblogs, and what you think most influenced your mental image.

No I'm not procrastinating from writing stuff, go away.

[majorshatterandhare]

[Answer options in order are:

1. Yes, guitar, mandolin

2. Yes, piano/keyboard

3. Yes, violin, viola, cello, bass (inc. electric bass)

4. Yes, percussion

5. Yes, a woodwind

6. Yes, a brass instrument

7. Yes, multiple

8. Yes, something not mentioned here

9. No, I do not currently play an instrument but I sing

10. No, I do not currently play an instrument and I do not sing.

End Options]

Please specify in the comments or tags!

I’m sorry there aren’t more options, I only had 10 spaces or I would’ve included more. I tried to go with the most common and obviously with groups!

What counts for singing is up to you. I think most people sing some amount, but you can decide if yours counts or not. The reason for this is because you can teach yourself an instrument, so not requiring lessons or anything for either instruments or singing.

If you want to learn an instrument, especially if you don’t currently play any, I would love to know if you shared!

Please reblog! I wanna know how many of us play instuments ourselves and what that distribution is.

If you don’t listen to the Mechanisms don’t respond to this poll! I’m sure your answer is very interesting, but it will skew the results!

[a-side-character]

This is about the tag you're scrolling, I promise

so I had the idea to make a post that read something like,

"Imperial Radch makes me want tea the way Gilmore Girls makes me want coffee."

Niche, right?

Then I had the idea to incorporate Justin McElroy's quote "I would bury a bowie knife in any of your chests to eat French Onion soup this exact second."

So I am now VERY interested in the overlap between these three things. I thought it might be too niche, but this is the too niche website.

To clarify, you're familiar with it even if you've only seen a few eps of GG, only listened to a bit of Taz Balance, only read a bit of Ancillary Justice, etc. Even count a fandom by proxy if you happen to know a lot about one of them without directly engaging with it (enough to know what the post is referring to).

Awaiting these results with baited breath.

[2aceofspades]

oh my gosh I had no idea you were writing a book! what’s it about if you don’t mind my asking?

Thankfully, I'm not the one writing it hehe 🥴 Just illustrating it :) But thank you so much for your curiosity as I really appreciate it! ☺️

The book follows Camila, a young girl navigating life and learning rather helpful skills and tools along the way. It's a children's book that children and adults can read and apply to their own lives, or simply just read and enjoy. It's my hope, and the hope of the writer I'm working with, that my illustrations bring an overall lighthearted vibe to even out the heavier and more serious topics presented in the book.

Here's a lil sketch of Camila and her older brother Dario cuz I love drawing them <3

(:

[coquelicoq]

i've been dying for a poll option ever since i saw my followers' answers to that text post from february 2022 asking people whether they pronounce beloved as "be-lov-ed" or "be-loved". many people were emphatic about only using one option, and many others use both but were not always able to articulate when they use 2 syllables vs. 3. so out of the goodness of my heart and my insatiable lust for knowledge i have gone through the notes on that post and written down some likely contenders! you're welcome!!!!

BEFORE YOU ANSWER! think about how you would pronounce beloved in the following syntactic contexts:

noun, talking directly to the beloved: hey there beloved

noun, talking about rather than to the beloved: my beloved lives in a pineapple under the sea

adjective in a noun phrase: my beloved x lives in a pineapple under the sea

verb participle: x is beloved by y

okay poll time! there are no wrong answers!! and apologies in advance if i didn't capture your truth, i only had 10 options and life is a rich tapestry!!

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s3 episode 14 thoughts

okay, i didn’t watch an episode yesterday. so the thought of being reunited encourages me. although i’m still a bit bitter about the last episode, i guess considering it some sort of cosmic “opposite day” makes it more palatable. still. new episode!! 

well. new to ME, at least!

and it mentioned gargoyles in the description?? the stone fellows? i actually think gargoyles are cool as hell. some of them look wretched on purpose- which i am less fond of- but others are very cute.

but i’m unaware of them possessing any sort of life or supernatural capability beyond being funky little guys. and to me, they don’t look like creatures who have a craving for blood. perhaps mulder knows something i do not…

we open on a naked man. he’s quite beautiful. posing for some art students. good way to make some decent money, if you’re comfortable doing such a thing.

a guy in the corner is drawing furiously and trembling. but he’s drawing a spoooooky creature and not the handsome man we see on the screen!

AUGH he sliced his finger and IS DRAWING with the BLOOD?? no ma’am. no ma’am. 

the trembling blood artist is rushing out and running into people. and we see a gargoyle on top of the building he is leaving!!! an ominous sign? or a nice little guy?

handsome model man is getting in a car in a back alley. we hear a thunk. oh no. i see where this is going…. someone in a mask jumps on him

the artist wakes up. his name is john. and the FBI bursts in, mulder included! john bites someone who is arresting him!! yowch!

his room is full of very spooky drawings, covering the walls and everything. all gargoyle looking creatures. hey, maybe he’s goth??? you thought about that?? maybe he streams the cocteau twins and doodles some creatures... can’t a guy have hobbies?

not defending the killing of people. just the freaky drawings.

some guy takes a picture off of the wall, then he finds john's artist knife thingy and it’s covered in blood. the question is: is it his own? because we did see him slice that finger.

mulder's office time. so this john is an immigrant from uzbekistan, but he spent almost a decade in an insane asylum.

SCULLY IN RED!!! SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL. WOW! 

she says this guy killed at least 7 people. and apparently he claimed to be possessed, which is a thing that lots of killers do to distance themselves from their crimes. seems plausible to me.

skinner name drop!!!!!!!! he was the one that put them on this case. good to know he’s still around, tasking them with things. 

(it seems i have grown fond of skinner, despite our tumultuous time together. i am sure my feelings towards him will continue to fluctuate)

so john has been in custody for 5 days, BUT yesterday, another killing took place with the same signature face gashes. who did it!!

off to da prison. scully asks john why he isn’t using his bed. and it is because john is drawing on the floor. also the light hurts his eyes, but i think that would make sense if you were stuck in a dark room for many days.

he says that this creature he’s drawing was the one who killed those men and everyone knows his name. perhaps the devil, mulder suggests? no no, says john. it. scully’s like “well it’s fingerprints weren’t on the murder weapon; yours were” gag him a little…

but john calls them both fools. rude! 

scully asks if that is what happened yesterday- that it attacked again, and killed another victim in the same fashion- and john starts really freaking out because that means “it found somebody new”. so if it keeps jumping from guy to guy, i’m not sure we can ever really stop this thing short of an exorcism. if it really exists, that is.

the agents get called out by bill, who was the dude taking the drawings off the walls at the crime scene and who found the knife. he’s being mean to mulder, asking him if it was aliens. hmm. not sure i’m supposed to like his guy. 

but scully knows who he is, and says it’s an honor to meet him; he's famous for his FBI work. he asks if she also thinks it’s spirits, and she says no, and bill says well that’s strange company you keep. a shameless dig right in front of the man they speak of!

mulder looks sad more than angry, and says that no one would ever guess how mean-spirited bill is. and yes! maybe he can write a good book but damn, he’s being a jerk!

bill is offended by the possession theory because he worked on that case for three years and blah blah blah. doesn’t explain the second murder. bill claims that both murderers were acting alone. um okay?? that doesn’t make sense because then how would they have the same markings…

mulder is pissed at this guy and i don’t blame him. bill says john draws the gargoyles to keep the evil spirit away, mulder points out that is what they have been used for in the past, which pisses bill off further. scully is watching all of this like wtf. and he’s with some other dude who is staring at scully in a manner i don’t care for. we later learn that this second man is named greg.

mulder says bill has always hated him because mulder never worshiped him back when they worked together, even if everyone else did. ohhh, mulder says that to bill, catching a monster meant becoming one yourself. that’s juicy. i wonder what he means by that. 

(author's note: WE LEARN WHAT HE MEANS BY THAT!)

so now they’re at the crime scene, covered in gargoyle drawings. shoutout to props design. 

a cat jumps out and yells at scully!!! she is scared and i would be too! mulder says “it’s just a cat” like that makes it’s sudden appearance less terrifying, and she sighs and says she thought it was a picture coming to life. there’s a bit of a laugh in there, like she realizes how ridiculous that sounds.

mulder gets on his knees, peeks under the bed, and tries to call to the kitty LMAOOO AWWWWW but it sneaks away through a hole in the wall. they realize it’s hollow and it’s actually a door! 

scully still seems scared to go in there, asks to wait until there’s more light, and he pulls out a tiny flashlight lmaoooo 

meow kitty. and inside the door are horrific gargoyles sculpted out of clay. 

MULDER WIPES HIS FINGER ON THE CLAY AND LICKS IT? HUH??? then be starts digging in there. AND BLEH!! bodies. inside the clay!!!

he craves the minerals of clay i guess...?

he put the flashlight in his mouth so he couldn’t talk, and she kept yelling for him to tell her what the hell was going on in there, which he was not doing. too busy ruining some art that contains people to communicate what was in his line of sight, i suppose. but no explanation on the licking.

some guy is working in a glass studio when he is being approached. use the molten glass for self defense! but alas, something growls and grabs him. 

so now glass guy is in the hospital and greg is here. she tells him they found 5 bodies in the studio, all dismembered and with gashes on the face like this guy, the glass artist.

greg says that he thinks bill went to skinner and REQUESTED mulder on this case. and that bill tells him “mulder stories” after a few beers, about how he’s some kind of genius. HELLO? the vibes are weird here. why is he telling her this....?

and the victim in the hospital bed is gagging or gurgling a bit so the doctor asks them to please leave. i can imagine this would be distressing.

mulder is a library!! a big, nice library. reading about gargoyles, apparently named after a french dragon!! he’s flipping through old books and it looks like he has blood on his shoulder, which makes me concerned about his hands and therefore the condition of said books. he’s monologung about the nature of the human soul and taking notes. okay, a researcher! “is this the monster called madness?” <- how poetic!

AWWWW he falls asleep on the books. WAIT STOP :((( why is this so cute… he was working too hard again smh!

bill scares him!!! and wakes him up!! RUDE! i thought it was going to be scully and it would be sweet but it’s this loser. he’s asking what mulder is looking for, and he admits he isn’t sure yet. 

and bill is back on his yelling at people bullshit, saying mulder is wasting his time, that john is only doing all this gargoyle art because he is insane. and he is MEAN!! he tells mulder that he’s disappointed in him and he comes back with a “well, i wouldn’t want to disappoint you by not disappointing you”<- ooohhhh get his ass.

why is he here at this library anyway? it seems unprofessional and stalker-adjacent. bill leaves with some more parting bullying and mulder seems really upset honestly. he looks out the window and sees A GARGOYLE! they're haunting him!

scully at the door to his place. she lets herself in. she’s so pretty. but where is he?

oh. he has covered his place with gargoyle art. so that is not a promising sign… did he steal it??? or is this his own work? 

we then see him back at the crime scene, staring at the same drawing that is in his house. so does he possess a copy machine, or a photographic memory and a secret talent for drawing? or did someone break into his place and target HIM?

why is he back at the scene of the crime? pacing about. what is going through your mind, strange man. why is he touching the art. while there are voices whispering. HUH?? MULDER POSSESSION ARC??? 

now HE’S sculpting stuff?? okayyyy artist!! at 3 in the morning. at a crime scene. he’s SLEEPING in john’s bed??

but he wakes up!! to a creepy gargoyle looking creature standing over him!! he grabs his gun and starts running. climbing ladders n stuff. but then he loses him. 

NO! the creepy guy jumps out and slashes at mulder. and then knocks him into a big pile of something soft. very lucky.

scully is with mulder now, he’s getting bandaged up, and she’s telling him how scared she was. “you turned your phone off? why do you even bother carrying it?” <- lmaooo

he claims he was “working” in john's studio at 3 am, and scully is NOT happy because she hasn’t heard from him in 2 days, which is a concerning amount of time to be apart for them!

he’s insisting that whatever it is, it’s real. and she says she knows about his “new wallpaper”, and that bill is “testing” him. with some sort of psychological torment? yeah, seems in character. 

he leaves without telling her where he’s going and she is NOT happy. she marches up to bill. and starts asking what the hell he’s doing to mulder. bill says he wants to finish the case and to “let mulder do what he needs to do” because she won’t be able to stop him.

HELLO? the man is going off the deep end. his best friend (who is a doctor) is going to be trying to help him. that’s an unstoppable force (mulder's desire to finish his quest) meeting an immovable object (scully's need to keep him safe and healthy).

fuck you, bill you’re really making me upset. because you’re making scully upset. and fuck your little henchman greg watching all this. 

but she notices a razor stuck in a car nearby. wait, do you think this henchman greg is the killer?

she finds the handle underneath the same car….

mulder is back at the jail, talking to john. asking why “it let him live”. he’s asking john to help him get deeper, to help him find it.

OH! he punched john when his answers weren't helpful. his mouth is full of blood. john says that only it can find him, and maybe it already has. 

MULDER POSSESSION ARC!!??? or is it an exploration into the evils people can be driven to out of desperation and a quest for answers?

scully took the razor and handle she found to the lab for analysis and she’s putting on some sunglasses to look at stuff. okaaaayy. 

AND THEY ARE MULDER’S PRINTS ON THE KNIFE!!! she is shocked. she has to excuse herself. 

she’s going to the archives and someone gives her a box. she just gets on the floor and starts looking through it. no time to bring it to a table, we need answers NOW. it’s the evidence box from the crime scene, and that knife from evidence is missing. 

and skinner wants to see her right away!!! what is going on?? she looks soooo scared. 

but she looks good. 

anyway, skinner asks if the knife she found could be the same as the one from the crime scene, and also, how is mulder doing? well, i would say, not good. she says she’s not worried about him, but he can tell she’s lying, because he says “off the record, so am i” no :( what did they do to him?!

mulder is back at the crime scene again? looking at the clay gargoyles. 

WHAT IS GOING ON... THERE ARE ONLY TEN MINUTES LEFT. HOW IS THIS GONNA GET WRAPPED UP?

that CREATURE ATTACKS HIM AGAIN!!! and he sees bill and the other guy greg there???

but it’s just a dream. okay, well i was fooled. guess i’m gullible. he’s actually sleeping at his apartment on that damn couch again. once again asking for mutual aid funds to buy him a mattress. 

anyway, he wakes up covered in sweat and surrounded by gargoyle drawings all over his walls. clearly a very healthy man /s

now he’s getting up and leaving his apartment. creepy music is playing as he goes back to the crime scene. to do more searching. now he’s looking at the gargoyles IN REAL LIFE. and the music is getting more intense.

the cat is licking some blood on the floor!!!! he follows it to a hand??? but whose….. 

greg calls scully, and leaves a message saying to call her back. but we hear his phone ringing at the crime scene when scully calls it! so where is he? well, i have a guess. mulder picks up greg's phone.

she asks about the prints on the knife, and he says he wanted “to see what it felt like in my hand” which is deeply suspicious!!! you’re scaring me!!!

she says mulder needs to stay EXACTLY where he is, and that she will be there in a few minutes so they can “work this thing out together, okay?” and MAN she is a good friend!! she will wake up in the middle of the night to find you losing sanity at a crime scene after you stole a murder weapon, and she’s gonna do what it takes to help you out. he says “yeah” and hangs up. he seems unappreciative.

he’s looking at a sculpture with great intensity. it looks very wet. and then he DIGS INTO IT AGAIN and finds ANOTHER FELLOW IN THERE. is it GREG??? it IS!

mulder hears a noise behind him and its bill. he’s adding two and two together- or possibly being delusional- and saying that greg knew it was bill who did the killing, so bill killed him. and bill’s hands ARE covered in clay. bill seems really confused. mulder has him at gunpoint.

mulder says that bill imagined everything john (the killer) did as he got deeper and deeper into his profiling over the three years it took to solve the case. and when he caught john, it wasn’t enough. by then bill had become the monster like he always said to! and he brought mulder in on the case for subconscious help!

scully rolls up and pulls her gun out. because let’s be honest, it’s not looking great for mulder. he asks her to put the light away- also suspicious- but tells him to explain. and then bill shoves her down. mulder helps her up and says “it’s him”.

next thing you know, they’re searching on the roof. i’m scared someone will fall over the edge. 

everything is very tense. and then the gargoyle grabs mulder again. we hear a gun go off! scully screams "mulder!!" and she runs over. 

he shot bill! right under the roof gargoyle!

now bill is in jail and screaming about “not doing it”. 

mulder wrap up time. “if a man’s character is his fight, this fight [against evil] is not a choice but a calling” <- ooooh okay banger line. gonna have to think on exactly what it means but it sure does SOUND cool.

closeup on gargoyle drawn in blood on the wall, presumably by the jailed bill. while mulder talks about looking into the laughing face of of madness.

hmm. initial thoughts: hmm.

this episode was used to dive into mulder’s psyche. to examine his past and also his fragility. he throws so much of himself into a case, that he almost loses who he is. 

but it also could have been the influence of an evil gargoyle... so: ??? 

i think that, in general, sanity is a frail thing. and we see how delicate it is, how people who are capable of evil can manipulate and terrorize. if you assume that mulder wasn’t in any sort of actual demon possession, it’s scarier, seeing how people can lose themselves. if you go with the interpretation that there was no real demon at all, and the urge to do evil came from bill’s year’s long quest to catch the killer, then that proves the point even further. in that interpretation, the result is very scully-esque, how the real horrors of life are the unpredictably of fellow man. and we could see how terrifying it was to her, how scared she was of him disappearing, not communicating, covering his walls with scary drawings (that we never really got answers on if he drew himself?), how the way he acted started changing, and she was losing touch with the person she knew so well because of how he was being manipulated. how she was going to do anything, from confront bill to track him down at 3 am at a crime scene to try and keep him safe.

i think mulder wanted to prove himself to bill, and so he pushed himself as hard as he did. he seemed really hurt by his lack of approval, which probably stems from mulder’s reputation for getting results, even if others consider his approach unorthodox. 

but then why would mulder cover his place with those drawings?? and why did he want to feel the knife in his hand? was it because he wanted to see how the killer felt before doing something so awful? if so, why now? there have been tons of cases before in which he could have held a murder weapon and pondered its use on taking a life. was it his glance into the history of gargoyles that got him all contemplative on the human nature and what evil is and if it can be resisted, or if it is something that is inside of you and unavailable? was he tempting himself to prove if he could resist it?

i’m a bit puzzled. i guess you can take a bunch of approaches here on who really did the killing- bill and john, or a force of evil- and why. and whichever read you take will characterize the themes of the episode very differently. please share what you thought; i’m curious on if there was a popularly accepted interpretation or one that the creators intended us to get, or if the ambiguity was intentional. i feel like i'll be gnawing at this one in my mind for a bit, trying to reach whatever it was saying.

it was very tense, but overall a pretty good episode. things i liked the best: mulder pssting a cat, worried scully, angry scully yelling at bill for messing with mulder’s head, an apartment entrance (she still has the key to his place <3), mulder falling asleep in a library after going on a quest for gargoyle facts (art history nerd? library nerd? you decide), scully in a red suit, scully telling mulder very firmly to stay still so she can come get him and they can figure whatever situation he is in out together, brief scully sunglasses moment.

wouldn't it be funny if they both got pets from a case? if that cat wasn't feral, he could have adopted it. taken it around for walks on a cat harness. a lovely thought!