#ventress and dooku would kick his ass and he knows it

[roseaesynstylae]

Alpha-17 is widely considered to be the single most badass trooper in the GAR. (Well, there’s also Fordo, but he’s quieter and more reserved.) There are all kinds of rumors that range from the plausible (Alpha-17 once destroyed a droid factory in an hour and on his own) to the absurd (Alpha-17 fought Dooku and Ventress at the same time and won). You’d expect them to be a cadet-exclusive thing, but a shocking amount is spread among the ranks. Only the other Alphas and, to a lesser extent, the Command Batch can sort fact from fiction. Alpha just thinks it’s hilarious.

[madamrynodm]

Clone Wars/Prequel Characters + Partner Pokémon

Screw it, I’m gonna do this. Gonna break this down by different star wars properties so this post doesn’t climb into the stratosphere...

Anakin + Talonflame - Everything about Anakin screams fire type to me. I can just see baby Anakin learning to podrace with an enthusiastic fletchling trying to keep up. A talonflame racing alongside his jedi starfighter would be sick as hell. Sadly, this pokemon would probably die in his transformation into Darth Vader, but I’ll deal with that later...

Padme + Ninetales - I almost said milotic here, but I think Padme’s got some spirit to her that matches a ninetales. All pretty and elegant (a ninetales would compliment her wardrobe nicely), and vulpix could be common enough that her handmaidens could all have one. Also a fire type to match Anakin :)

Obi-Wan + Gardevoir - Gardevoir just screams “so uncivilized” to me, it’d fit his vibe. Obi-Wan, as The Negotiator, strikes me as the type to have a fairy type. Something classy, maybe cute, but it can KICK ASS when the cards are down

Ahsoka + Grovyle (later Sceptile) - It’s all in the dual-wielding, baby. I think back to Gen 3/Advanced Battle when grovyle would use leaf blade like Ahsoka’s reverse grip. It could evolve later when she gets her white sabers in Rebels, showing how she’s come into her own since leaving the Order

Rex + Shiny Nidoking - Old school clone needs an old school king. He strikes me as the more grounded heh counterpart to Anakin’s high-flying antics, but he’s got the cunning to utilize a poison type well. A shiny to match the 501st, of course

Qui-Gon + Sawsbuck - He’s got grass type energy to me, and it matches his lightsaber. Also, his “go with the Force” vibes fit how sawsbuck changes with the seasons

Plo Koon + Noivern - This is one part “he would totally have a big softie of a pokemon” and one part “great pilot needs a great flying type”. You know this thing would dote on Ahsoka’s grovyle like how Plo dotes on her

Yoda + Kecleon - It just kinda fits. It’s a pokemon that I can see him taking to the Council but also thriving on Dagobah later down the line. It’s deceptively good in battle for looking like a funky little lizard

Wolffe + Lycanroc (midday form) - I mean, this one explains itself. Woof woof

Ventress + Weavile - Another aesthetic choice with this one. It wouldn’t be her original partner Pokémon but one she gained after starting her training with Dooku. Ice type just feels right for her and she can freeze opponents when she runs away

Greivous + Aegislash - A FINE ADDITION TO MY COLLECTION. Seriously though, a steel type that is a sword just... it fits too good

Count Dooku + Roserade - A Pokemon that’s got that regal drip but can also drag your ass. Dooku would have raised this guy from his jedi days and stayed with it when he left the Order. Maybe it wouldn’t have evolved until after he left, representing his rebirth as a sith

Maul + Banette - The man that refuses to die needs a ghost type. Also, the pokedex states that banettes are pokemon that were cast aside and now come back with a vengeance. Sound familiar?

Palpatine + Persian - Definitely referencing Giovanni with this one. But, also, I think Peepaw Palps would probably have a really unassuming normal type while doing his whole chancellor thing. With Order 66, I’d imagine that this persian would die/be removed in some capacity. Then, I’d give him Darkrai

Satine + Milotic - The elegance and outwardly gentle nature of a milotic fits. Milotics are real dangerous in battle, but I can see Satine raising one as a statement about her pacifist ideals. Deliberately choosing not to fight with one hell of a water type. They’ve kicked my ass before so that informed this decision

Hondo + Sableye - Got that cunning of a dark type with an eye for PROFIT! Would definitely discover mega-evolution by accident

Jar Jar + Magikarp - C’mon. Them both being aquatic beings helps too

Note: The Bad Batch will have their own list. I’ll put Echo in both lists. Maybe I’ll have to make a clone list because... gee whiz there’s a lot of them

[strawberry-selfships]

What's your favorite things abt your current main f/os rn??

oh my goddd cracks knuckles (sorry this ask took me a bit to get to, school has been kickin me around) this post is SO LONG and I apologize . idk how to add those “under the cut” things on mobile :( sorry

the man currently in main residence of my brain is count dooku so I’ll talk about him! I love how he holds himself so much . yknow he’s a count like a real one so besides being all evil he’s very disciplined and respectful and he just aughh he behaves so politely and it gets to me so much . he would treat me with the upmost respect and courtesy and consideration esp because I’m his romantic partner and it is just so sweet to think about ;w; oh my god also another thing is that he’s so powerful both physically and politically and I just think that’s so cool ?!?? he’s the leader of the ENTIRE separatist Movement AND he’s an ex-jedi Sith Lord . with fucking Sith Lightning . How goddamn cool is that right it’s so awesome . apart of why I love him so much is that if something bad happens he can kick ass if need be!!! he can easily wipe the floor with someone!! dude went one on one with YODA and it was a fair fight + yoda literallly Trained him . plus he could easily hold me up and carry me around which I love :3 OK ONE MORE THING ABT DOOKU he is so smart. he is So smart aabhss he’s got that whole “know your enemy” thing because he used to be a jedi so he knows so much about them and he absolutely puts that knowledge to good use when taking them down Plus he trained qui-gon jinn, grievous, AND ventress which is really damn impressive considering how powerful all three of them are . count dooku is so fucking cool and AAHBHGHH OK I KNOW I SAID ONE MORE THING BUT ONE VERY LAST THING. he is soooo pretty goddd fuck he’s gorgeous I wanna pet his beard so bad his face is built beautifully and his voice is like silk auhgbhgg his voice is so wonderful he can be so gentle or so intimidating he can do whatever he wants aaahgbhsws!!!! Ok this post is rlly long so I will be quiet for now

[crispmarshmallow]

Hear me out!

Yoda = Weird-but-Wise-Green-Great-Grandfather

Count Dooku = Estranged-Grandfather-That-Is-Plotting-Your-Demise-Except-For-That-Of-The-Eldest-Child (’Cause at least he no idiot)

Qui-Gon Jinn = Dad-That-Left-His-Kids-To-Deal-With-All-the-Shit (Albeit not intentionally)

Obi-Wan = So-Done-With-These-Lovable-Idiots Eldest Child

Anakin = Up-To-No-Good Middle Child

Ahsoka = Everyone-Loves-Her-And-She-Knows-It Youngest Child

Padmé & Satine = Will-Kick-Your-Ass Daughter In Laws

Rex & Cody = I-Would-Die-For-You- Best-Friends-Of-The-Children

Bonus : Asajj Ventress = That-Weird-And-Scary-Aunt-That-Is-Somehow-Your-Age

[littlespaceporgs]

The Clone Wars Reacts - Part 1

Or, Leah thinks Yoda is a badass and thirsts and coos over Plo Koon.

Welcome to part 1 of season 1! Ngl I’ve only got 2 episodes for the first one because i didn’t have time to watch a third, so here we go. These are just the thoughts and notes i took as i made my way through the episode, in their absolute rawness, I’ve barely even edited them so enjoy? and before anyone mentions it, yes I could do these on tiktok and you guys could watch me being an idiot, would anyone be interested in that however?

Tags (if anyone else would like to be tagged in this series, let me know!): @acciokenobi​ @roseofalderaan​ @catsnkooks​ @peacelandbread​ @littlevodika​ @icedcoffeeandgays​ @captainrexstan​ @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky​ @mcu-padawan​

Episode 1: Ambush

> Fuck yeeeeeaaahhh this intro is a fucking bop, I forgot how much I like it

> OH WAIT HANG ON YODAS IN THIS EPISODE, like it’s actually Yoda centric???? mad.. i thought it was going to be anakin and ahsoka this ep

> FUCK I KNOW THAT VOICE *enter ventress*             - this woman could step on me and I’d say thank you ✨

> Oh shut tf up Dooku, nobody cares what you have to say

> “Sprung the trap, we have” no shit, is it just Yoda’s trademark to say exactly what’s going on?

> HAHAHAHAHHAAH “ITS MY PROGRAMMING”!!!!!

> I have some questions, who has the creativity to come up with characters and planets that look like this?? Like that’s so cool????

> Huh you actually think you’re gonna catch Yoda???? Interesting thought.

> HAHAHAHAHA SMALL SHRIVELLED GREEN ONE WITH A LIGHTSABER *accurate tho, and I live for Ventress’ sarcasm ngl

> I want to point out the peak humour of one droid saying stop, we’re not gonna fit, followed by a droid attempting to fit                  >> actually scratch that the droids are hilarious in general

> HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH HIS GIGGLE AND THEN DO YOU GUYS KNOW WHAT HE MEANT?!

> why is yoda likeable in this episode??? If you can’t tell already, I don’t like Yoda very much.

> “He IS a little one!”

> alright fine. i admit it, I don’t think I’ve given Yoda enough credit, I didn’t like him much, but 10 minutes episode and I’m lowkey giggling at him.

> Dude Yoda is so cool *(Notes: i have written in a column here: should rename the title of part i to “Yoda is a fucking boss”)

> The force is so cool ngl

> “Trouble? Know nothing of this trouble, I do” hahahahaha hahahahaha

> AW HUNNY NO YOURE NOT EXPENDABLE YOU NEED TO GO WITH THE SHRIVELLED GREEN LITTLE SHIT

> good job Yoda make em feel better for me thank you

> *droid battallion approaches and Yoda just fucking sits there* Have I mentioned that Yoda is literally so cool?

> Bruh I shouldn’t be surprised that the 4 of them destroyed an entire battalion but that was legit AWESOME

> HA HA HA HA AH BITCH YODA GONNA KICK UR ASS

> Eh i don’t think I’ve said this enough, Yoda’s fucking cool.

> PFFFFFFFFFFTTTT fully just stole her lightsabers - imagine how much trouble Yoda would’ve saved himself if he had just kept the bastards instead of letting her take them back

> Alright fine, maybe I will enjoy this season.

 Episode 2: Rising Malevolence 

Notes: I am so sorry in advance, to be honest this entire one is just me either thirsting or cooing over Plo Koon and I can’t help it, and no, I still have not decided dad or daddy (its currently 14(?) hours after I watched the episode and I am still very undecided and I don’t think I’m ever gonna be able to make that choice)

> HEY ITS LITTLE BABEY AHSOKA AND OMG HOLY SHIT HES IN THIS EPISODE????????????????

> Lowkey I dunno if it’s dad or daddy?

> Awwwwwww Lil soka (wait I’m talking about Plo Koon in case you’re confused) (NOTES: uh I know I put it up top but just case you missed it)

> Sorry, did Anakin just say he was gonna ask the council?? The fuck?? 

              >>Be mindful????? Who the fuck is this????

> Ugh it’s palptatunes slimy looking ass

> OBI OBI OBI OBI OBI OBI OBI

> oh shit man that’s bad *if you haven’t clued in I’m going on about the weapon

> AWWWWWW HE WAITS FOR THE CLONES TO GET ON FIRST

> dude what the fuck is going on with his hair??

> Everytime Plo talks my mind goes 🥰 sorry that’s off topic (or is it?)

> At least obi-wan sees sense, Anakin teaching an already reckless Ahsoka was never going to end up with them both being quiet

> AHSOKA! 😠

> Oh wait Wolffe doesn’t have his scar yet????? WAIT DOES THAT MEAN WE SEE HIM GET IT LATER?! Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh-

> HAHAHAHAHA HE ONLY TAKES A BATH ON BREAK

> HMMMMMM AWWWWW I VALUE YOUR LIFE MORE THAN FINDING THAT WEAPON

> There’s more alive, oh good I was afraid that they- aw shit poor Plo he sounds like he feels so guilty

> fucking hell I just wanna give him a hug and kiss his cheek and make it all better (NOTES: see what I mean???? Thirst or fluff?)

> OOP THERE IT IS! I was wondering when the usual Anakin would show up

> “Redeployed himself.... again.” I can feel obi-wans exasperation with this kid man

> Okay so, Anakin is a little shit. So disobey the council but don’t tell them that I’m teaching you that

> Aw no there’s gonna be more clones die??????? Oh no and they have to watch oh no oh no oh no-

> I have questions: How are they screaming? I don’t think that’s how space works??? Ok but I legit don’t know?? Is it even possible to scream in space?? And shouldn’t it have killed them straight away?

> Aaawwwwww Ahsoka my baby (literally anytime this child comes on screen)

> “Anakin where are you” I love obi wan so much hahahahahahahahaha

> WAIT NO PLO AND FEW OF HIS SONS TROOPERS ARE ALIVE DONT LEAVE

> oh good job R2, crisis averted

> Pfffftttt the droid humming is distracting me from the more potential death

> Plo Koon is cooler than Yoda, you cant change my mind so don’t try.

> YEEEEETTTTTT poor sinker yikes I can’t imagine flying through space is fun

> PALPATINE YOU BASTARD HE PROBABLY WANTS MY LOVE DEAD HOW DARE HE

> “Twice the trouble they have become”?????? No shit Yoda. What were you thinking pairing these two disasters up?

> AND THEN HE TRIES TO GET THEM TO ABANDON DAD(DY?)

> R2’s whirring is a vibe tho

> AAAAAAHHHH NOT TO ME PLO MY HEART 🥺🥺

> oh god the animation is terrible (NOTES: I can’t believe it took me that long to make that comment)

> Aw he seems so sad, thank u Ahsoka, she gave him the love and hug he deserves

> Ugh now my internet’s playing up dang it, well this is infuriating, I WANT TO KNOW IF THEY DESTROY THE WEAPON OR NOT?!

> He seems so genuinely scared??????? Plo has me getting major feels

> OH SHIT FUCK THE OTHER DROID SHIT FUCK NO SHIT

> how did everyone hate Ahsoka when this first came out??? I love her so much

> I mean like, I know they’re not gonna die??? But I still feel so anxious omg

> Holy shit the disappointment that rolls off of dooku is kinda hilarious (it took all of me not to start giggling at this)

> “Riiiiiiiiiiiiight the council report”

Alright gonna stop here, because I have class in 20 minutes and there is no way that I am leaving the library if I start watching episode 3 so uh see y’all next time for episodes 3,4,5 and maybe 6??

[multi-fandom-nutjob]

10(ish) Characters I want in LEGO Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga! (and not as DLC)

So yeah. They’re remaking one of the greatest games I grew up with and it’s coming out in like a year. Well, not remaking, so much as going back to the drawing board and rebuilding it from scratch! Which is awesome!

But from what I’ve seen, there isn’t much buzz about this on Tumblr, so imma make a post and see if it gets any traction.

(((((No Legends characters will be mentioned, since I didn’t think they’d make it because of the Mouse.)))))

1. Ahsoka Tano (S1-3, S3-5, Rebels, Rebels Finale, S7)

Ahsoka is straight up tied with Darth Vader and Obi-Wan Kenobi for my favorite characters in the entire franchise! Not only that, but she was in LEGO Star Wars 3 as one of the major recurring playable characters and in LEGO Star Wars TFA as DLC, but only in the Rebels form.

Now, the definitively preferred outcome is for all five versions I mentioned to be unlockable, but from what I’ve heard, the Extended Universe isn’t getting much rep in the game, so she might get relegated to DLC. This would be pretty sad, especially since LEGO Star Wars 3 never went past Season 2 of the show, when it honestly got so much better.

Not only that, but each version of Ahsoka would bring something new to the Jedi gameplay. One of my biggest criticisms of the Complete Saga was that most of the Jedi played the same, so there wasn’t any incentive to play as them over the Sith. Ahsoka’s lightsaber style, however, could prove to diversify the combat greatly.

2. Asajj Ventress (2D, TCW, Bounty Hunter)

Asajj Ventress is an absolute queen! Among the Seperatists, she ends up being a scalpel amongst hammers. Because of Prequel Rep, we know Darth Maul, Count Dooku, and General Grievous will get their just dues, but Ventress’s fate is a lot more uncertain.

The biggest obstacle in her way might be whether it comes down to her or Savage Oppress, and ultimately, I would much rather have Ventress than Savage! Don’t get me wrong, Savage is great too, but with the inclusion of Maul, we already have a Double-Lightsaber wielding Nightbrother on the roster. They could certainly have different styles to it, with Maul’s acrobatics compared to Savage’s brute force, but I’m not certain TT Games will go that far. Ventress’s dual wielding would force some creativity to come through.

Ventress is also, frankly, a more fleshed out and entertaining character to add to the roster. Her inclusion could a lot of fun banter in all the action.

3. Wampa (Empire Strikes Back)

The Wampa was intended to be a playable character in both LEGO Star Wars 2 AND the Complete Saga. I’d say the big guy’s debut beyond a cutscene is long overdue!

Some might argue that he’s too big and too one-note to add anything to the gameplay. I’d argue, however, that the Wampa could play very similar to the big, beefy character in the LEGO Marvel and DC games, slamming into the ground and charging at opponents. In a game full of force-sensitives and bounty hunters, a wall of muscle would definitely be unique!

4. Yaddle (Prequels(I wanna say Phantom Menace?))

Do you know who’s cooler than Yoda? The mom of Baby Yoda, that’s who! Yaddle is one of those weird additions to the Star Wars Mythos that came back in a big way with the Mandalorian. While it isn’t exactly confirmed who Baby Yoda’s parents are.... c’mon, we all know.

Not to mention, Yaddle is one of the very, very, very few character in Legends and Canon to have an orange lightsaber, which would be really cool to see in gameplay. Sure, you can just make an orange lightsaber for your Custom Character, but isn’t it cooler to have a character on the regular roster with one?

5. Rey (Yellow Blade) (TRoS)

(((Sorry, that was the only pic I could find and it was too funny not to use)))

Speaking of oddly colored lightsabers, Rey finally made her own lightsaber in the last two minutes of RoS and it needs to be in the game! Honestly, I’ve been wanting Rey to make her own blade since she reached out to Luke at the end of TFA. She never got the chance to really develop her own style whenever she just used the “Legacy Blade” as I’ve called it. They desperately need to make this an unlockable in the game and not DLC.

(And was it just me, or did it really look like it was double-bladed from how the bottom looked?)

6. The Inquisitors (any of them) (Rebels, Fallen Order)

Okay, so, truth be told, I kind of hate these characters. Like, really hate these characters. The Grand Inquisitor and the Second Sister were the only ones that ever narratively struck a chord with me, and that was really only even in backstory. As actual antagonists, they’re all on par with Team Rocket in terms of threat and are far less endearing...

Hence why they’d be perfect in a LEGO game!! With a more comedic tone overall, the Inquisitors would fit right at home! Heck, mixing the lightsaber combat generally exclusive to Sith with characters only able to do Jedi Force Powers would make for an interesting dynamic.

Plus, the “helicopter-blades” as they tend to be called would honestly kinda work in a LEGO game? Sort of? Like, it’s stupid-looking, but we know it’s stupid looking, and it would help a lot with getting over huge pits and that sort of thing(like Artoo!). So there could be some precidence for them, so long as they were used right.

7. Ovissian Gunner (Battlefront 2... 2)

Just... just look at this doofus! He’s high as a kite and he’s packing a mini-gun! I don’t even play Battlefront 2 and I love him so much. I would take him home and introduce him to my parents. I would treat him right because he deserves the Galaxy. And he deserves to be in this game!

8. Kirak Infil’a (Darth Vader comics)

Ever wondered where Vader got the Kyber Crystal for his new lightsaber? He killed this guy and corrupted his Kyber Crystal to do it, and kept the same hilt for a long while before he rebuilt it to be what it was in the Original Trilogy.

As one of the few Disney Canon characters added to the Prequel Era, I’d say this guy has earned his stay in the new game, especially since I had to keep Legends characters off the list(((for unfortunate reasons))).

Not only that, but he kicked Vader’s ass for a good bit before dying, so having a badass grandpa who left the Jedi Order like Ahsoka on the roster would be fun!

9. Cal Kestis (Fallen Order)

I mentioned him before, but this guy and the Ovissian Gunner are the only two characters on the list with Video Game origins, which I think would be fun to explore in arguably the most famous video game series for the franchise!

Not only that, but he’s the only Jedi(besides this one jackass in the Clone Wars) that has a double-bladed lightsaber, which he can also detach into dual wielding blades! That alone brings merit to him being on the list, but the fact that the player can decide the color of the lightsaber in the game also poses an interesting concept I’d like to see them implement! That idea being, that every time you reignite his blades, it randomly slides between all the Custom Character options besides Red. Either that or it goes in a specific pattern, of course.

((And is it just me, or is his name very suspiciously close to that Kyle Katern guy from Jedi Knight II: Outcast?))

10. The Mandalorian (not gonna spoil his actual name)

You’ve gotta admit, Mando and Baby Yoda took the world by storm when they first premiered. One of their main creators was Dave Filoni, the same guy who directed The Clone Wars and Rebels! I think, from his help with the franchise to the overabundant success of the show, that Mando ought to be put in the base game as an unlockable(maybe as a sort of 100% completion reward?).

Not only would that just be great for the fans, but he’d be tons of fun to play as as well! His evaporating rifle and underhanded fighting style would be tons of fun to play as, and a character who passively deflects blaster fire would add a whole new dynamic to the roster, though he’d have to take damage to lightsabers to not be completely broken.

I can’t fucking believe I forgot Leia with her lightsaber!!!

Do i expect these characters to all make it into the game? Hardly. If even three make it in, you can call me impressed. But you can’t tell me that these ten wouldn’t be a ton of fun in a LEGO game!

[phoenixyfriend]

Yes! This is all relevant!

I'm playing around with the when of it a lot; we know that Fulcrum was good enough to land a blow on Vader at Malachor, and even if we assume Vader was holding back for reasons of sentiment, he's still definitely not an easy opponent. So like, she's definitely good! In battle.

As several people (including yourself immediately above) have pointed out, Fulcrum's probably really, really good at practical, survival-focused fights, but more controlled 'this has rules' spars aren't exactly going to do her favors. She can definitely still kick the asses of most of the Masters in the Temple, considering she's gone up against and survived multiple Sith; she survived 35yo Maul, who's had years upon years to focus his skills on killing (one specific) Jedi, while Qui-Gon, a seasoned Master from the same sword-skills lineage, died to 22yo Maul.

So we can assume that, even without a whole lot of people to spar against, she's managed to at least keep her skills in shape to when she was seventeen via forms and solo practice, and especially 'block the laser' droid stuff, and she's probably managed to improve a little on the basis of improving her general battle awareness and connection the Force.

But again, this all contributes to Fulcrum being incredibly competent in the field, but not necessarily very smooth or controlled or Proper in the salles.

I think it would be very funny (in a painful way) if she agreed to spar with Dooku and he was winning while they followed the rules and then her mind tripped over "I'm losing a fight to Dooku" and she had a flashback to The War where he was the Sith that haunted her nightmares (when Ventress or Grievous weren't there, since she ran into them more often), and so she starts fighting full out and hella dirty and breaking all the rules and like. Dooku doesn't want to hurt her. This is just a traumatized thirty-something having a PTSD-induced episode of some sort and trying to kill him shortly after bantering, so he's still following the rules that are in place to make sure there's a minimum of broken bones, etc, but it's Fulcrum so her not following the rules when her opponent does means that she shortly has Dooku on his knees with her sabers crossed over his neck (neither of them knows the irony of this position, and they never will), and that is when someone finally manages to talk her around, as she's trying to remember Who Has The Handcuffs and processing that nobody with her has cuffs, because Rex isn't here, because she's in the past, and Dooku isn't evil, and oh fuck what did she just almost do.

And so she runs off, hops into the vents, and squirms her way into the sub-sub-sub-sub-sub-sub-basement to ride out her guilty panic attack in peace.

She's definitely good enough, even with her very unusual style and occasional need to call a halt to the spar for Mental Health Reasons that people continuously seek her out for help and spars and she builds up the more delicate skills she hasn't had a chance to practice for fifteen years.

(Maybe not quite as much with Dooku as he hopes. Mace gets to spar with her plenty, as does Yoda. Then Fulcrum spars with Depa and wow is she lucky that Togruta don't blush.)

Can Rebels!Fulcrum win a spar against TPM!Mace Windu? Are there any TPM Jedi she'd definitely lose against without making them work for it? What about maybe-hasn't-left-yet Dooku? Yoda?

My instinct is that she's more or less on par with Dooku and Mace, and it's a coin toss who wins (she wins more at first because she knows their styles, but they don't know hers yet, and then it sort of evens out), but almost inevitably loses to Yoda.

(This isn't a discourse or "my fave is better" thing, it's for poking at character development options for Fake Spontaneous.)

[stairset]

Hondo Ohnaka is the most op Star Wars character he's gotten the upper hand on Dooku, Obi-wan, Anakin, Ahsoka AND Maul. And Dooku trained Grievous, Ventress and Savage so Hondo could probably stop them too. Plus in Son of Dathomir Maul held his own against Mace and Aayla and Dooku killed Tiplee, so the three of them would also get schooled by Hondo. And Mace trained Deppa, who trained Kanan, who trained Ezra, so Hondo could beat all them too. And Obi-wan, Ahsoka and Maul all kicked Pre Vizsla's ass so Hondo could beat him too. Oh and Grievous has killed lord knows how many jedi so basically any jedi Grievous has beat, Hondo could also beat. Force sensitive Han? Bullshit. Hondo's the one who's unknowingly force sensitive. I bet only Yoda and Sidious could beat him bc they're like the big ones. Anyone else is a fuckin pussy compared to Hondo Fucking Ohnaka.

[shadowsong26fic]

Yet Another AU because I love these things

This idea actually came up in discussion with my Roommates last month, but I decided to do a Distaff variant instead b/c I’m so so sorry it was late. (Is still late...)

[The other AU outlines I’ve done can be found in the tag]

Anyway. We all love time travel fics, right? Here’s one with Luke. Tiny, precious, twelve-year-old* Luke.

Who jumps back to the last year/year and a half of the Clone Wars.

And lands on Ventress.

*Luke is possibly ten instead? Somewhere in that range, anyway. We’ll say twelve for now.

ANYWAY, Luke is off exploring/goofing off, as bored kids do, and he comes across a narrow, winding little canyon he’s never seen before.

“Huh,” he thinks. “Could’ve sworn I knew this part of the desert better than this.”

Naturally, he decides to see where it leads. He finished his chores early today, and there’s still a few hours before dark, so he has time. Adventure!

Except then things get...weird.

He could swear he’s only been walking an hour, but it’s suddenly dark. And, when he turns around to retrace his steps, all he sees is solid rock.

“I’ve got a Bad Feeling(tm) about this...”

There’s no way to go but forward, so he does. Especially when he catches a glimpse of a campfire flickering up ahead.

He knows there’s a good chance whoever built it is Not Friendly--he’s not an idiot--but he is beyond lost, he’s got no supplies...he figures it’s worth taking a chance. At least peeking a little closer. So he heads for the fire to ask for help.

And there, he finds Ventress! Ventress has just finished a job.

This is a few weeks after her and Obi-Wan vs. Maul and Savage.

Why is she camping in the desert? ...reasons.

So, this random kid comes up to her. This--bright, shiny, supernova-in-the-Force kid.

....okay, then.

Ventress really does not have time for this shit.

When he asks for her help, she considers telling him to get lost. See above, re: no time for this shit. Also, she’s really, really uninterested in babysitting a brat who was stupid enough to wander off in the desert like this.

Except the alternatives to keeping him are killing him (which would be...pointless, really; also she’s not super-interested with killing a random kid who’s no threat to her at this point in her timeline, unless she’s being paid for it), or sending him off to a slow death via desert or Sand People (which is just lazy; if you’re gonna kill someone, freaking do it.)

Besides, maybe his parents will pay her if she brings him home. Not a lot--he’s dressed like a small-time farmer--but, hey, every penny counts.

“You can stay here tonight,” she finally says. Might as well keep her options open.

He brightens. “My name’s Luke,” he offers.

“I don’t care,” she grumbles. “Go to sleep.”

Things get...messy...the next morning.

See, that bounty Ventress just collected? Someone else thinks it was his, and resents her poaching.

He and a bunch of his heavily-armed friends track her down, catching up with her and Luke just as they’re breaking camp.

Naturally, a fight ensues.

Ventress is exceptional, but vastly outnumbered.

Luke is tiny and inexperienced, but a) he knows the desert, b) he’s a decent shot, and c) he can hotwire a speeder in under thirty seconds.

Suffice to say, with Luke being a major contributor, they kick some ass and escape unharmed on a bike Luke stole from one of the other bounty hunters.

Ventress grudgingly admits that the brat was kind of useful back there, and he possibly just saved her ass a little bit--or at least spared her some inconvenient and painful injury--so maybe she shouldn’t demand a ransom after all.

She sighs, and instructs him to pull over so she can drive--kid’s good, but she has her dignity to think of--and tells him she’ll take him home, make sure he gets there safe, then take the bike and leave.

Things get weird again when they get to the Lars homestead.

Luke has her stop at the edge of the property. “This isn’t right,” he says, biting his lip. There’s supposed to be another building right there; he and Uncle Owen just finished putting it up last season. And the closest vaporator is an older model; one he vaguely remembers trying to climb as a toddler, before it was replaced.

Also, he’s pretty sure that old man is his step-grandfather, who died before he was even born.

“What about it?” Ventress asks. She can feel the Force swirling around them, around Luke, like ripples spreading out from a stone dropped in a pond.

“This is my uncle’s farm, but it’s wrong.”

And he sort of--sort of--has a clue, because there’s Stories, about people wandering into the desert and coming back to find that years have passed in a night. But things are a different kind of wrong. He’s never heard about anyone going backwards. Besides, that’s all they were--stories. Right?

He takes a deep breath. “What year is it?” he asks, after a long minute.

She quirks an eyebrow and tells him.

“That doesn’t make sense!” He blurts out what year it’s supposed to be.

Which...actually does make a weird amount of sense to her. Because of the way he casts ripples in the Force, if nothing else.

And, honestly, she’s seen weirder crap than time-travelling twelve-year-olds. She led a zombie army, for crying out loud.

Luke is freaking out a little bit, so she punches him to get him to shut up.

She points out that, while ideally he gets back to his own time, he still needs to survive until he figures out what the hell happened, let alone how to reverse it. “Lucky, you have a home where you can wait all that out.”

(A part of her knows that’s a stupid idea--whatever brought him back here, either it’ll work in its own damn time or he’ll need information he sure as hell won’t get on tiny farm in the middle of nowhere on freaking Tatooine.)

“They don’t know me yet,” he says sadly, scuffing the ground a little.

....no, she insists to herself. She does not need a kid tagging along, especially one this bright with power who has no idea how the world works. At least in the here and now.

But he’s quick on his feet, and keeps a level head in a crisis.

And he is a decent shot.

And one hell of a getaway driver.

Besides, she can always ditch him later if he gets too annoying. Changing her mind in the other direction would be a lot harder.

“Fine,” she grumbles. “You can come with me. For now.”

“Okay,” Luke says. Where else would he go, anyway?

And thus begins the highly entertaining saga of Asajj Ventress luring twelve-year-old time-travelling Luke Skywalker into a Life of Crime.

Except, as the weeks and months pass, it becomes less her leading him into a life of crime (...well, it kind of is; he’s really, really good at stealing cars and Being a Distraction), and more her evaluating jobs based on how Sad Luke looks when she does something really unethical.

What, she thinks, what the hell is this. Why do I give a damn what the brat thinks? I did not sign up for a portable conscience! I am leaving him behind at the next port, I swear.

Except somehow she never does. She picks jobs that won’t disappoint Luke, and he uses his share of the profits to get shiny things that would make their ship so cool, Asajj.

Eventually, she gives up and accepts the inevitable. For as long as Luke is stuck in the past, he’s hers.

(She wishes, sometimes, that she could take him back to Dathomir, and introduce him to her sisters.)

(...important detail I forgot to mention before: she doesn’t know his full name. He didn’t give it when introducing himself, and she never bothered to ask.)

They probably have an Encounter with Boba Fett at some point.

Possibly Cad Bane or Hondo.

Maybe even BB!Han and/or Lando because why not.

So many possibilities...

Fast forward a bit. Luke and Ventress are hanging out on Coruscant, when she sees a familiar face with a  bounty attached.

(Anakin’s had some...weird...dreams the past few days. Not bad, not threatening, just...weird. Ever since he got recalled to investigate the Temple bombing. They’ve taken second place to said investigation, since they don’t seem to be urgent or anything, but--he’s maybe a little bit distracted.)

(Luke’s been dreaming, too. He told Asajj about them. She tells him to keep track of them, and tries to guide him through looking for what actual useful information might be in them, but dreams have never really been her strong suit...)

Anyway, Ventress tells Luke to stay in the apartment, and goes to Investigate.

The first bit, with Ahsoka, goes mostly as in canon.

With an added incentive for her pardon--if she’s free and clear, she can get Luke the help he needs, to figure out his dreams and find his way home.

(Honestly, she’s sort of surprised he hasn’t caught any eyes yet, shiny and powerful as he is. Jedi really are blind idiots.)

(And didn’t Dooku’s Master live on Coruscant? ...maybe she should take Luke somewhere safer...)

(After she helps Skywalker’s brat and earns her pardon.)

The part where she gets jumped by Barriss and loses her lightsabers does, too.

Except she called Luke to let him know she was on her way home. And when she doesn’t turn up, he goes looking for her.

And then Anakin tracks her down.

They fight; Ventress does her whole “Ahsoka and I have a lot in common. My master abandoned me, and that’s exactly what you did to her.”

That’s when she senses Luke getting close.

And, suddenly, it clicks.

Talk fast, she tells herself, because there’s no way this conversation ends well if Skywalker sees Luke now, with Tano still in play. (Because if he gets distracted and delays and fails to save his apprentice because of them...)

She gets out what she knows as quickly as possible.

Except Anakin senses him, too. And Ventress suddenly got tense and very to-the-point, with none of her usual banter.

But Ahsoka needs him right now; he has to fix that first.

But whatever’s going on here is Important; he knows that with every fiber of his being.

Besides, if Ventress is brushing him off, if she’s lying to him--

Anakin is thisclose to strangling her again when Luke comes charging in.

“Asajj!”

“I told you to wait for me in the apartment,” she snaps, trying to get between him and Skywalker before things get even more out of hand.

Anakin is VERY CONFUSED right now because what the hell is going on okay that’s definitely the presence I felt approaching but none of that explains why the hell Ventress has a kid with her.

Let alone why this kid feels so familiar.

Luke peers up at Anakin with big, puzzled blue eyes, trying to answer some of the same questions in his own mind.

“Don’t you have an apprentice to save?” Ventress cuts in, putting a hand on Luke’s shoulder and pulling him behind her.

(Luke tries to wriggle past her; settles for peering out from behind her back.)

“Ventress--” Anakin starts.

“Well?” she prompts. “And isn’t that rescue time sensitive?”

He continues to hesitate a breath longer. But she’s right. He knows she’s right. 

"Maybe we can help,” Luke pipes up.

That, at least, seems to get through Skywalker’s thick skull. “No, I’ve got this,” he says. Then he glowers at Ventress. “But after I talk to Barriss--”

“I’ll be here, Skywalker,” she says, then, realizing her mistake, claps a hand over Luke’s mouth before he can blurt something out and hold the Jedi here any longer. “Run along now.”

He almost rises to the bait, then glances at Luke and turns and leaves again.

Ventress relaxes once Skywalker’s gone, and lets go of Luke’s mouth.

“He is not a navigator,” Luke says, sounding thoroughly awed.

“.......no,” she says. “Who told you he was?”

“My uncle,” Luke says. “He doesn’t talk about him much. He died before I was born.”

Ventress has a Very Bad Feeling(tm) about the future.

And she does some quick mental math.

Oh karking hell.

She takes Luke back to the apartment, and starts grilling him for details. Which she now realizes she probably should have done a long damn time ago.

Anakin, meanwhile, goes back to the Temple to confront Barriss. He’s still at least partway focused on that kid in the alley, which might affect the outcome of their duel.

She does still get captured, and Ahsoka’s innocence is still proved, though.

And Ahsoka still leaves.

So he’s still reeling, on several levels, when he goes back to look for Ventress and the kid.

He doesn’t have to look too hard; she lets him find them in an alley not too far from where they separated.

“Are you okay?” Luke asks.

“Sure,” he lies.

Luke looks up at Ventress, uncertain.

“Not here,” she says, and leads the way back to her apartment.

“I keep dreaming about you,” Luke blurts, as they walk. “I mean, I think I’m dreaming about you? It’s all sort of vague.”

Anakin thinks back on his own weird dreams the last few days, and nods. He has some kind of connection with this kid, and he can almost--

He stops, in the middle of the street. No...that’s not possible.

“Not here,” Ventress hisses. Luke takes his hand and tugs it.

They get to the apartment, and Luke confirms what Anakin has started to guess.

“I’m Luke Skywalker,” he says. “I’m from the future. And I’m your son.”

For a minute, Anakin just stares at him, because this can’t be real; he and Padme are so careful, and time travel is not a thing.

But he can feel the truth of what Luke is telling him.

Ventress waits until he settles, then follows up with a bombshell of her own.

“You know I’m not your friend. Or your Order’s. But I am Luke’s friend. And based on what he’s told me, about how and where he grew up--raised by people I had never heard of, and believe me, I know who most of your friends are. So we think something awful is about to happen. We don’t know what, exactly, but a lot of people are going to die.” She sighs. “And I suppose we want to help you stop it.”

...and that’s about as far out as I have planned in detail. But Padme, of course, will be brought in on this pretty much right away. Ventress will probably drag Obi-Wan in even if Anakin refuses; he owes her a favor and they parted on reasonably good terms, and he’s good at this sort of thing (“He looks a lot like Ben,” Luke muses, after meeting him; which just raises more questions), and once Luke shares the Emperor’s name...

Shit is going to Go Down.

Bonus:

MEANWHILE, BACK IN THE FUTURE

After Ben realizes Luke is missing, he sends a message to Bail, and then goes to try and find him...

[comic-movieheroesranked]

Cinematic Comic Characters Ranked! (Year 2008) Part Three

Wow, I just want to say that 2008 really stepped it up when it came to comic movies released. Granted, a couple weren’t the best but overall this year was one of the best out of the bunch. The Dark Knight and Hellboy II: The Golden Army are the only sequels this year, while The Punisher: War Zone and The Incredible Hulk serve as reboots. Star Wars: The Clone Wars serves as a prequel and we also see the debut of Iron Man, Speed Racer, The Spirit and Wanted! Lets start off our largest list yet! Here’s #40-21!

*SPOILERS AHEAD FOR THE MOVIES HIGHLIGHTED ABOVE*

40. Lucias Fox (The Dark Knight)

"Consider this my resignation: As long as this technology is at Wayne Enterprises, I won't be."

Lucius Fox is still running Wayne Enterprises by day and creating the latest technology for Batman by night. His recent work in sonar helps Batman in his mission to retrieve Lau from China and also in the end to hijack every phone in the city to spy on the Joker. It's nice to see Lucius isn't blindly loyal to Bruce as he threatens to quit as long as the technology is still around, but his worries are put to rest when the technology destroys itself after capturing the Joker.

39. Pekwarsky (Wanted)

"I want you to live."

I don't know if Pekwarsky is a real priest or just uses it as a cover, but if he isn't bluffing then it's pretty ironic that he makes bullets for Cross as a little side job. He knows all about Sloan's corrupted ways and helps Wesley discover the truth after he kills Cross. He wants Wesley to honor his father's dying wish and leave the assassin life, but doesn't argue when Wesley refuses.

38. Thaddeus "Thunderbolt" Ross (The Incredible Hulk)

"As far as I'm concerned, that man's whole body is property of the U.S. army."

Betty's arrogant father, who wants the power of the Hulk to be a military weapon for the U.S. army and starts a witch hunt for Bruce once the man goes M.I.A. Hardly anything would stop this man from his quest, barely even his own daughter. It's his drive to capture Bruce that ends up aiding Emil's transformation into Abomination so he really should take some blame on the attack in New York. In the end, he gets saved by the very thing he despises, Bruce.

37. Mom and Pops Racer (Speed Racer)

"I saw my son become a man."

Pops used to be a big time racer and often goes head to head with his sons, first Rex and then Speed once he's 18. At the end of the day, though, Mom and Pops still end up supporting Speed in everything he does. We even get to see Pops kick some major ninja ass.

36. Ellen Dolan (The Spirit)

"You're in love with every woman you meet, Mr. Spirit."

Ellen Dolan isn't just the new flame of The Spirit, she's the best surgical doctor Central City has. She ends up arriving to several crime scenes to help out victims and even The Spirit himself, even if he tries to deny any help. Even though they're clearly dating, The Spirit just can't help himself when it comes to flirting with the ladies and MAYBE  that has to do with Ellen letting it happen and forgiving him right away every time it happens. Maybe she's into it, but one day she's probably going to skip throwing operation knives at walls and go straight to throwing them at The Spirit himself.

35. Asajj Ventress (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)

"Typical Jedi scum!"

Ventress is a sith lord working for Count Dooku. She's the one that originally kidnaps Jabba the Hutt's newborn son and then stages it to make it seem like the Republic were the ones behind it. When she's ordered to 'rescue' the baby, she fails to defeat Anakin and Ahsoka even after using her cool mind control powers on Rex. She finally goes head to head with Obi-Wan Kenobi but proves to be no match for the experienced jedi.

34. Frank Castle/The Punisher (Punisher: War Zone)

"This is just the beginning."

Yes, this is the lowest the main character of a film has been ranked. Even though I think the first Hulk was worst, to be fair, this version of Frank Castle just doesn't deserve to be placed higher than the rest of the list. This rebooted/sequel version of Castle felt like a parody of the first Punisher and man was it a  bad one. He was so slow in his movement and he had the emotional capacity of a brick wall. If it weren't for Jigsaw and Looney Bin Jim getting on my nerves, I don't think I would've rooted for him. And the Punisher is one of my favorite characters, maybe that's why he's so low, but damn it was just such a downgrade from his appearance in 2004.

33. Yinsen (Iron Man)

"So you're a man that has everything...and nothing."

Why was this man so nice? I don't believe anyone deserves the kindness he showed to Tony right off the back as he basically saved his life, even though he had to implant a car battery to his chest. He helps Tony create the prototype suit to escape by saying he will join his family after. It isn't until Yinsen gets critically wounded that he reveals his family has been dead the entire time and is ready to join them in the afterlife. Like, really? We didn't deserve him!

32. Rex Racer/Racer X (Speed Racer)

"It's a mistake I'll have to live with."

The entire movie the mystery is whether or not Racer X is Speed's older brother Rex, who was thought to be dead after a horrible car crash. Turns out he is, but no one in his family finds out, as Racer X decides that it's better for them not to know. I don't get why he wears a mask when his face completely unrecognizable but hey, maybe he was going for an aesthetic. He ends up supporting his brother the entire movie as Speed brings down the corrupt Royalton and winning the two races Racer X never did when he was Rex.

31. Cross (Wanted)

"You're my son."

I had a feeling something was up with Cross since he appeared to be the main villain, yet we were getting no backstory whatsoever or any scenes with him coming up with a plan or just anything that proved he was the bad guy besides killing the assassins from the Fraternity. Turns out, not only is he good and trying to stop Sloan's corrupted ways, he's even Wesley's father and has been trying to rescue him from the beginning. Too bad he literally dies right after Wesley discovers the truth, but that's only because Wesley was the one to shoot him in the first place.

30. James Rhodes (Iron Man)

"Next time, baby."

Military General and former MIT classmate of Tony Stark, Rhodey Rhodes is obviously not the biggest fan Tony Stark. He respects him, that much is obvious, but the two have completely different personalities that tend to crash throughout the film. It doesn't help that Tony literally always causes trouble on military level and Rhodey is always left in the dark, until he finally discovers that Tony is Iron Man and helps him take down Iron Monger.

29. Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)

"You'll have to do better than that, my darling."

I just want to say that Obi-Wan Kenobi is so damn charming! Even when he's going up against people who are truly trying to kill him he can't help but let his charming, yet shady, comments slip his tongue. I feel like they tried to go that route with the live-action films but they didn't really pull it off like this film did. Obi-Wan teams up with Yoda and assign Ahsoka to Anakin to train, hoping the latter grows now that he's a teacher. He spends most of the film arriving just in time to clean up Anakin's mess and save his life, as a responsible master should.

28. Alfred Pennyworth (The Dark Knight)

"Some men just want to watch the world burn."

Everyone's favorite butler is back and he's still made of 100% sass. He still constantly worries about Bruce and if it were up to him, there would be no Batman, but he still offers his help whenever he can, especially once the Joker starts getting momentum in his plans. It's Alfred who gets Bruce to realize that Joker is a man that doesn't fit the mold of the average criminal, a unique breed that just does things for the hell of it. Still always trying to protect Bruce, he hides Rachel's letter-which basically has her dumping him-from him after she dies.

27. Liz Sherman (Hellboy II: The Golden Army)

"You should be running."

It's great to see that Liz has gotten more control of her fire abilities because who wouldn't be worried about her blowing up all of Hellboy's kittens every time they got in an argument? She shows her control when she ends up saving the team from being devoured by a bunch of cannibalistic tooth fairies. It's also during the fight that we learn she's pregnant with Hellboy's baby. She keeps him from the truth, worried he isn't mature enough to handle being a father. She changes her mind though when he nearly dies and has to convince the Angel of Death herself to bring him back. In the final battle, Liz is the one who destroys the Golden Crown, and therefore destroys the Golden Army, once and for all. When she quits, along with the rest of the team, she tells Hellboy that they're expecting twins.

26. Betty Ross (The Incredible Hulk)

"You zip it. We're walking."

I really liked Betty in this film. She got seriously hurt when Bruce first turned into the Hulk but still managed to jump into him with open arms because she knew right away that the Hulk wasn't something that Bruce could control. As soon as they're reunited their romance returns and Betty helps Bruce travel the country to find a solution to his problem, while also trying to avoid her father and the U.S. army. What makes Betty so important is that she's Bruce's anchor. Three times she's been able to snap him out of his uncontrolled rage just with the sound of her voice, helping him finally control his anger.

25. Silken Floss (The Spirit)

"The Octopus always finds his nemesis so distracting."

Silken Floss was probably the smartest person in Central City but for some reason just decided to take orders from The Octopus. Maybe it was the fact that he can't die or maybe it's because she truly just thinks all of this is fun. She's the only female who doesn't fall for The Spirit's charm, probably because she's gotten used to being complimented by all the dumb clones around her.

24. Sloan (Wanted)

"Otherwise, shoot THIS motherfucker and let us take our fraternity of assassins to heights reserved only for the gods of men!"

I like Sloan's character because it allowed me to witness Morgan Freeman shout 'motherfucker' in the most gangsta way possible. Besides that, Sloan is just a man with power that gets carried away. After the code he serves basically betrays him, he uses it and the strength of his assassins for his own gain until he's discovered by Cross. Not wanting to ruin what he built he ends up lying to Wesley, Cross's son, and convinces him to kill Cross himself. Too bad for him, Wesley finds out and gets his revenge, killing Sloan at the very end of the movie.

23. Padme Amidala (Star Wars: The Clone Wars)

"It is I, and the Republic, who owe you our thanks."

Padme came in late in the game but man did she show up! As soon as she finds out Anakin may be in trouble with the Hutts, she goes out on her own to try to settle things down between the Hutts and the Republic. She ends up discovering that Jabba the Hutt was betrayed by his uncle and Coun Dooku but gets captured before she can reveal the truth. She manages to send out a distress signal and then agrees to a treaty with Jabba once she reveals Ziro the Hutt's betrayal. Her little moment with Anakin was super cute and I'm glad they didn't spend too much time on their relationship.

22. Obadiah Stane/Iron Monger (Iron Man)

"Trying to rid the world of weapons, you gave it it's best one ever!"

Maybe Tony is too trusting because it was fairly obvious that Obadiah was out to get him. Ok, so I don't think anyone could have predicted that Obadiah was trying to kill Tony but it was clear that he was not his friend when it came to the company. He piggybacked off the success of Tony's father and then lead the company himself after he died. Did anyone honestly think he willingly gave that position of power away to Tony and was ok with it? It's laughable thought that he wants to steal the company when the only reason it's successful is because of Tony. Obadiah has no credit to himself, the whole movie he just tries to steal Tony's ideas. He even names his suit Iron Monger, which is barely different from Iron Man. In the final confrontation Tony proves he's smarter than Obadiah and fries him in his suit with the help of Pepper.

21. Speed Racer (Speed Racer)

"Racing is all I know how to do."

It's not surprising at all that the greatest race car driver is named Speed Racer. I mean the name is as creative as North West. But you know what would've been interesting? If Speed was actually a horrible driver or wanted nothing to do with racing because he didn't enjoy it. But it's fine, this works too. Speed himself is a little boring, his one-liners aren't that witty and his supporting team are a bit more interesting than him. He's just super bland but at least he stands up for what's right and never once considers giving up.

[sl-walker]

unspeakablehorror

replied to your

post

:

Also, anyone who seriously debates whether...

I was reading this, and thinking it over, and it makes sense. It would explain why Sidious went to take out Maul himself in The Clone Wars, too. He knew Maul was well trained enough in dueling that he could probably trash Dooku. And since Ventress was trained by Dooku, he’d be able to take her out too. Fun stuff. Maul and Ventress areceventually going to meet in Cut Strings. In Heart of Shadow, too, but probably not for considerably more chapters.

Basically, yeah.  Also, the only person I can recall who truly bested Maul in saber combat -- like outright saber-to-saber -- was Sidious, until he died under Kenobi's blade.  And I can make a real argument that Maul went there to die, frankly, because no duelist that talented would pull a trick like that twice.  And Maul was goading Obi-Wan in that scene, too.

He'd slaughter Ventress.  I'm pretty sure he'd kick Dooku's ass.  I'm really sure he'd kick Grievous's-- er.  Bottom half.

Fact is, Maul is at his very best with his blade in hand.  His style suffered in some ways in TCW, he’s not as elegant, but he’s still fucking really good even if he’s not fighting for the joy of the fight there.  Like-- I get people have their faves, but the reality was that at twenty-fucking-two years old, he’d mastered several forms, including the hardest one; he was good at offense, he was good at defense, he was fast, adaptable, had incredibly good footwork, could throw in hand-to-hand and Teras Kasi without missing a single stride and he could use telekinetics when he needed to.  Trying to downplay Maul’s skills for-- who the fuck even knows what reason is taking away the one thing that sets him apart from other Sith, even other Force users.  It’s his one art, of course he’s fucking amazing at it.

[throwingideasatthewall]

Clone Wars       Massacre

Oh, wow is that what     we’re really going with,

  Don’t get me wrong     the tone has been better     but are you sure you want to take on something       like a massacre?         (Sla-very-            Kinda-

   Aight,

  Start,

 (Also yeah whatever did happen to Ventress because she screwed up in attempt at Dooku’s life*, backing   down, and I thought she had just    cool-ed from the whole revenge thing-      -    *Not killing him        voluntarily   when she had the chance,        -          No

   Lightsisters? 

   Did I-       hear that      right?

    Yeah,

       It honestly sounds like they’re saying                “Lightsisters,”                        Instead                     of                  night sisters                     as                    previous,

Also yeah going back to the people that encouraged your toxic behavior and are toxic enabling generational breakers

Also, they don’t recognize      her?

I do have to admit I never got the idea of     plasma arrows,

   Or possibly     coming to hold someone accountable,

   That expression really      doesn’t speak of flee  

   Ing

  Also I’ve vented my emotions and I’m going to go kick the        unaccountables to the curb

   (With maybe        one more ro        -ast       before I do          so-)

   Point being, she seems a lot more stable          (And center     -ed)

   Uhm

     ?

   What,  

    Ok there was a small       modicum of change            in the emotions,

     Hid-ing

    Hey, that’s good

    Much

    Hey there’s some accountability there,

    Has forsaken

    Okay never mind       it’s spiraling             downward           -s

     N-othing

     Sisters

     Kinda the weakest relation of all 

       but this is actually pretty on top

      Just replace sister with a “friend,” or “generation,”     and you’ve got a good idea

        At least it wasn’t             “me”,

        Yeah,

        Sith

      Okay, that’s some good    advice,

        Us       That’s a bit of thought assuming,

        Ordered about

     Ah, lady that includes you          you know,

       Sisters

       Ok you know I’m all about loyalty to generation and humanity,          But this is feeling kind of supremacist right now,

     Like

       Maybe        a bit jumpy,

  Okay this is a relatively validating       talk

   Never mind it just got tox and         over involved,

     Gosh darn it

   The Bean wanted some actual non- over- involvement       affection/in     valid          ation-            And you turned it           tox,          Oof,      

    Ships

                           There are                           lots of ships, by the way

     Yeah, is this back to hunting down savage line or did          I just-           Oh,       Well this is an odd conversation

     Grievous just bounding up

           Not actu                     ally the relaxed or cordial meeting

           You’d expect from two people of      evil,

         Two that know the location of each other’s               lair,

         ...summon

   Pretty much out of nowhere because Dooku usually uses the       hologram, so far as we’ve seen,          And there hasn’t been any real big set up          to any sort of major event          That would require the           amassing of the                droid army,    Or an        in person      audience,

 Seriously,   you called him here for       that?

  Look my apprentice        tried to very weakly kill me         Pretty much up and           gave up near        the end,

      But I’m still sore,

    So I’m sending             you

Grievous; (internally)        I am a general         how would I be any          help in tracking down         one person, with            my pro-             fess            ion            in        Military,             A category so broad and       general (Area of            effect) that I would be          near to absolutely useless              in this quest,           Which boils down to very             specific              pettry

       Again how is     Grievous going to be at all helpful in this?            -              Like that’s a small ragtag team of          rebels,

         That is way below            his area of affect,

          He’s more likely to bungle it up on the basic concept of it’s             really outside his thing,    

 Also yeah let’s send the one lone person to a place most known for its        gaslighting,

     I know grievous is robot       but he clearly has emotions like a human          (Or any sentient)         Requiring/desiring stimuli            and companion                  -ship,

               (As                  seen                  previously)

                 Really this quest is really outside his       mode of    operation,

   Like he’s used to strictly logical widespread     warfare, against multiple moving shapes           (large vessels)

     And you’re sending him in to close range   restrained targets using emotional manipulation, at       high sp-        eeds-           -           (Similar to guerrilla warfare)

   You’re setting this dude up for failure

   Yeah he might succeed by numbers alone

    But you’re going to lose a lot just           based on wastefulness and           just that not being his mode of operation    (Noting particularly the expedition where he crash landed on a planet and barely made out with his skin)

-abandoning     hundreds of         troops   -         (I’ve already talked enough about how this                 just doesn’t work                            and     how this should be seen as a stupid move)

    And should be seen as more of an insult.

     Bent         Back

      Blue            Robe-                -             To         Battle            . . .           Against a small group of          rebels

(Like   seriously,)

Buddy, you can stop with the epic music I know that’s a lot of ships but there is nothing epic about this,

   Any way..

    Okay, never mind this got really tox,

    I do

  Loyalty is always been a weird concept to me because yeah it always changes because there’s so much to see and do

   The only loyalty should be to the concept of    account-ability

  (And not    being a dick    ,)

Ven -tress joins a death cult

  [Seriously blood oaths and              life oaths               are cre                ep-

People and things changed and no amount of oaths or       false promises are going to             fix that,

   It’s just something you have to except             or manage, correctly

You can’t control    other people.

Whelp she drank the whole thing of Kool-Aid,

(Also didn’t they just go over the con-   - sequences of messing with the stuff,”

Also guess he’s going to need a new name because     Ven-tress given to her by    her abuser      (Or was    so implied,”       )

?

Also I’m supposed to view this as advanced gaslighting      right

What hap-pened?

 Her eyes?

Night

“M       -other,”            Yep she’s drinking that Kool-Aid

     F-east

   Oh it was going to be used to introduce us to anyone else because we know literally no one and everyone else seems to be just   extras,

Bo-nding     is    nice,

  Will    ing        ly,         -      W-h         -        This is going      on-

    ?

   Thank you          p-erson I barely know          -            Also Dooku coming into ruin good times                   -           Buzz kill             -              Droid                . . .                  You know if it’s been time building up their                 bond,

           This might’ve been more impactful-

           [ It still works but       the weird creepy in humane behavior before hand doesn’t really help,”  

    ]

    Any way,

    W-ar

   So much for your plan

  [oh so yeah attacking random [Neutral] planet just because you have a    hate bo      -ner

     ?         -?

   You know this would be better if           it had occur-            red like right     -after,

    Like, Dooku, was like;        Okay, well that plan went horribly,           So now I know that Ven-           tress and all of          Dathomir hates me,

    Let me send someone        stealthy to do the job

     You’re telling me Dooku doesn’t have anyone           Besides like the main three            four-            Bad guys?             -             Like this is chain of command where are the         gimmick minions?

   [Besides evil, vengeance        And t    -ech,”           ]

      ?   Oy why do you have the Clankers  and the tanks    marching next to each   other?

  Like what do you want the    heavy artillery in the back,

  Yeah I get this gives them better   range but wouldn’t you want some    pro-tection            -             ?

   Also yeah what happened to all the       males?

   Like I know Ven-       tress       beat a couple of them     up,

    But,

     ?      -       No, they’re here because      Dooku is an ass who doesn’t understand   strat-egic     planning,

And also he sent   Grievous,

 Like you’re the     (Ex) concept of vengeance

     -          The confidence   alone        -    you should kick his ass

Also,     sense it?

 There was only four guys     to your entire   operation,      like 1/4         Chance..

W-h

 That suck         -ed

  Also   good job not dodg-        ing,

 Seriously that was pure     rock that she could      see coming,

Okay, there’s no way     -she’s dead,

    ?

  Okay?

Also where are the lines because you really didn’t have        her plan for this shit,

   [Also this would be a really great moment right now Ventress to go to Bez-er-ker mode and get some revenge on her ab-       us       -er          -       I know this whole things theme     is “letting go of the past,”        Which you do,         after you get the past somewhere          where it can’t constantly            hurt you,

  And pose      a threat            (Or          stress,     )

Point being emotions have a      reason as well as      (a time and a Place)       And while venting is fine           murder is not,            Don’t      conflict        the two        . . .   [Also     they’re just clustered together,”

   also how is your        gaslighting         magic going to         work against robots?

  [also is Ven-tress going to die because her arc is pretty much over and the only way I can see this ending is via redemption equals death

    (Seeing as she’s around Obi-Wan’s age (or at least an adult around          Sky          -walker’s) so her window of absolute redemption and accou-         ntability is      pretty much         over..

     Also,          Ok, I guess it’s against droid it’s not too much out of her       range,

     (Though if it’s actual people she would probably         be dead,)

    Or     daca?

  At-      tack-

  Also I guess she’s      lead-              er now,            (Also that line was a little        emotionaless)

        Trees

     Makes sense for the ar-           -chers     -use the surroundings,               ?

           Did she just            fall off a tree,              ,                    Good for                 Them,

         A-ight-

             ?

[so yeah sending the robots to deal with these sentient     person 

 least to say it’s no surprise that ended up terribly,

           ?

        Witches

        Again sending the tech guy was pretty much       guaran-      teeing failure,

      As in any older Gen          -younger Gen        fight-

   Metall

      ?

   Cave?

    Holo-    

    ?        ?

   ?  

[again    I’m putting that down to gaslighting          magic,]

     ?

   Why the look back?

    Or is that just showing us the magic cave 

     (for future reference)          -            ?

     And apparently the attack just stopped 

   (or maybe it’s on a different front)

    Point being those guys want needed and Mother needed two people to get the thing,

    ?

  What          ?

   Ser-iously there’s just someone       be-hind there?

   What’s the point of the            metal?

     Not,      even the same species

   (I think)

  Also, resurrect-?

   Look lady I don’t know what you know about resurrection but it doesn’t work like that,

  Definitely not something              a boomer can perform,

   Also,        Ah, movie you might not want to do that considering bringing people back from the dead tends to break any kind of tension,  or suspension,

   And she was presumably         an adult,

    So yeah      that shouldn’t be possible,

      ?

 Okay,  you do not really       want to go there,

    Ok yeah I’m going to have the bitch...   out about now

       (I don’t there’s anything particularly tox         or that I should know any of that info-             rmation,

      This is generally supposed to be some divine          zombie bullshit,

       Which,              Is just a nope for me          personally,

[Honestly this episode is completely fine, clearly meant to be some kind of  Grievous vs Ventress thing, and so long as the bring things back to the dead pothole gets closed up by the end of it      ,I’m not too mad

  (Otherwise the galaxy is pretty damn       screw.         -ed        [Quick.       Reverb]         Scan