#vent lol

[asoftepiloguemylove]

suddenly childhood ended and now i am supposed to know how to live

Franz Wright Entry In An Unknown Hand / Elena Ferrante (tr. Ann Goldstein) Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay (via @luthienne) / Jenny Zhang How It Feels / Anna Kamienska Astonishments / unknown / Gabrielle Bates & Jennifer S. Cheng So We Must Meet Apart / W. Todd Kaneko The Day After / image; SZA Blind / Ethel Cain Dog Days / @darkerthanerebus / pinterest

[alittletouchofthetism]

i hope there is something wrong with me.

i hope there are answers for my suffering.

i hope these tests, these doctors, these bills can formulate an explanation as to why my very existence is exhausting.

[stephaniesblogxx]

i hate being no one’s first choice no matter what i do and i try so hard but no one fucking cares i do everything for everyone and give my everything I LEAVE MYSELF WITH NOTHING i try to help everyone and no one helps me i just want to be listened to

[brst-xcx]

thinking abt deleting everything on my acc and starting all over.

This is gonna be long but I’ve been feeling like I’m holding myself up to higher expectations than I should. Constantly worrying about posting when I have ways bigger things to worry about irl, the fear of failure and people pleasing combo is a deadly situation.

but anyways, all of my longer works won’t be on here, I’m not doing kinktober.im sorry but mentally I can’t. But from now on I’m writing about things that I actually find Interest in. illstill write smut of course but atleast with this change of pace I’ll probably put out better stuff than the same copy paste content that tends to drain me a lot.

Hope you understand, see y’all for the renaissance.

[randommothxd]

☆tired☆

Vent post/srs

[swiftiebookwormlogastellus]

the subtle ache in your heart that comes with knowing that you’re just a person in the eyes of your friends. That you could die tomorrow and they’d only care for a week. That most of them wouldn’t notice until they’d need you and even then they’d just find someone else to use.

The burning pressure behind your eyelids that comes with knowing that you’ve devoted your life to love and yet out of everyone you know, you struggle the most. That the people who couldn’t care less about it have people who love them. That no matter how much you’ve tried you’ve always burned.

the tension in your joints that comes with the want, the need to hold and be held. To feel safe when you’re around people. To have someone hug you without holding a knife to your back.

The simple torture in your mind that comes with knowing that the common denominator is you. That you’re apathetic about the people who care and pathetic about the people who don’t. That you’re too caught up in the memory of friends who crowded around the base of a tree because you’d climbed it and you were crying and they refused to leave until you did. That you’re too caught up in the nostalgia of good morning and good night. That you’re too caught up in the game of life to realize that it’s not a game to win but rather an experiment to enjoy.

that no matter what you do, you’re too damaged to be loved as you are.

[hereticalcelestial]

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fu

[paralleledharmony]

its pretty fun how whenever i spend lots of work and effort into specific pieces, no matter what it is really, it gets way less attention than if i were to post low effort 20 min doodles!!!

and when i say its fun i mean it really isnt and also i wish people cared as much as i did abt my own work. is that narcissistic?

[fourgottencoast]

i'm so fucking angry at the world for deciding to ignore covid and pretend it doesn't exist and letting it spread to the point of perpetuity. I don't want to have to risk my life to get even a slice of Living and connection to humanity. I want to be able to get the most out of life while i can and i fucking can't because i don't want to die early. But it still feels like such a waste of a life rotting away. I think 'i hate people' so much because of this. i wish i could go to bars and movie theaters and concerts and parties and travel and see my extended family and make friends and lovers and learn how to be human before i die

[delusional-nymph]

[namorssideburns]

Go fuck!!! Yourself!!!!

[charmingradiobelle]

I spent like 20 minutes at work crying in the bathroom I’m officially an average American employee😍😍😍☺️☺️☺️

[piercingsandfangs]

Tldr of yesterdays post; A guy lied to me about his name, gender and changed his face to not be identified since he's a rapist. He was probably planning to sa me. Could tell he was fetishizing me, wanted me to hang out with him alone, got touchy with no permission ( I'm in a relationship ), ect....😭

[skullpuke]

so my drink order got taken by one of the residents in my apartment and i have to wait for it to be resolved tomorrow 😍

[awkwardcreature789]

Someone love me

Please

I want cuddles

I want LOVE

GIMME

Pls

Literally someone better fucking come and scoop me up bridal style and shower me in affection and treat me like the embodiment of a puppy that I am BEFORE I LOSE MY FUCKING MIND AND EITHER GET LCOKED IN THE SILLY ROOM OR HAVE A FEW WORDS WITH WHATEVER OTHERWORLDLY BEING HAS CREATED ME

pls I am literally broke and delusional and so introverted and anxious and hyperfixated on like three things and sleep deprived and do art to distract myself BUT I WILL LITERALLY LOVE YOU AND DO EVERYTHING I CAN TO MAKE YOU HAPPY AND I WILL GIVE AFFECTION 24/7 AND I WILL GIVE GIFTS RANDOMLY AND STAY WITH YOU FOREVER AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I’ve got terrible looks and an even worse posture and on and off motivation, but I’m not COMPLETELY useless I promise

[sulfurhotspot]

Ramen noodles

------‐-------------------

You yelled,

I cried,

You said you didn’t know why,

I agree,

Y. O. U. D. O. N. T.