#vent lol

[asoftepiloguemylove]

suddenly childhood ended and now i am supposed to know how to live

Franz Wright Entry In An Unknown Hand / Elena Ferrante (tr. Ann Goldstein) Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay (via @luthienne) / Jenny Zhang How It Feels / Anna Kamienska Astonishments / unknown / Gabrielle Bates & Jennifer S. Cheng So We Must Meet Apart / W. Todd Kaneko The Day After / image; SZA Blind / Ethel Cain Dog Days / @darkerthanerebus / pinterest

[alittletouchofthetism]

i hope there is something wrong with me.

i hope there are answers for my suffering.

i hope these tests, these doctors, these bills can formulate an explanation as to why my very existence is exhausting.

[brst-xcx]

thinking abt deleting everything on my acc and starting all over.

This is gonna be long but I’ve been feeling like I’m holding myself up to higher expectations than I should. Constantly worrying about posting when I have ways bigger things to worry about irl, the fear of failure and people pleasing combo is a deadly situation.

but anyways, all of my longer works won’t be on here, I’m not doing kinktober.im sorry but mentally I can’t. But from now on I’m writing about things that I actually find Interest in. illstill write smut of course but atleast with this change of pace I’ll probably put out better stuff than the same copy paste content that tends to drain me a lot.

Hope you understand, see y’all for the renaissance.

[randommothxd]

☆tired☆

Vent post/srs

[swiftiebookwormlogastellus]

the subtle ache in your heart that comes with knowing that you’re just a person in the eyes of your friends. That you could die tomorrow and they’d only care for a week. That most of them wouldn’t notice until they’d need you and even then they’d just find someone else to use.

The burning pressure behind your eyelids that comes with knowing that you’ve devoted your life to love and yet out of everyone you know, you struggle the most. That the people who couldn’t care less about it have people who love them. That no matter how much you’ve tried you’ve always burned.

the tension in your joints that comes with the want, the need to hold and be held. To feel safe when you’re around people. To have someone hug you without holding a knife to your back.

The simple torture in your mind that comes with knowing that the common denominator is you. That you’re apathetic about the people who care and pathetic about the people who don’t. That you’re too caught up in the memory of friends who crowded around the base of a tree because you’d climbed it and you were crying and they refused to leave until you did. That you’re too caught up in the nostalgia of good morning and good night. That you’re too caught up in the game of life to realize that it’s not a game to win but rather an experiment to enjoy.

that no matter what you do, you’re too damaged to be loved as you are.

[delusional-nymph]

[namorssideburns]

Go fuck!!! Yourself!!!!

[fourgottencoast]

i'm so fucking angry at the world for deciding to ignore covid and pretend it doesn't exist and letting it spread to the point of perpetuity. I don't want to have to risk my life to get even a slice of Living and connection to humanity. I want to be able to get the most out of life while i can and i fucking can't because i don't want to die early. But it still feels like such a waste of a life rotting away. I think 'i hate people' so much because of this. i wish i could go to bars and movie theaters and concerts and parties and travel and see my extended family and make friends and lovers and learn how to be human before i die

[zootopiathingz]

I spent like 20 minutes at work crying in the bathroom I’m officially an average American employee😍���😍☺️☺️☺️

[piercingsandfangs]

Tldr of yesterdays post; A guy lied to me about his name, gender and changed his face to not be identified since he's a rapist. He was probably planning to sa me. Could tell he was fetishizing me, wanted me to hang out with him alone, got touchy with no permission ( I'm in a relationship ), ect....😭

[skullpuke]

so my drink order got taken by one of the residents in my apartment and i have to wait for it to be resolved tomorrow 😍

[sulfurhotspot]

Ramen noodles

------‐-------------------

You yelled,

I cried,

You said you didn’t know why,

I agree,

Y. O. U. D. O. N. T.

[xxkai-the-fryxx]

Ugh, I’m soooo glad that it’s Winter Break. School SUCKS. The only things that’s good about it is my friends, teachers, and the subjects occasionally. The other kids at school are so rude for literally no reason. Kids will GLARE at me in the hallway just for the way I dress or the people I hang around. Don’t even get my STARTED on my physics teacher. She literally misgenders me 10000% of the time and all she does is yap yap yap and make things sound more complicated than how they are. I sometimes hate the fact that I’m practically the top of her class because she will IMMEDIATELY choose me to answer her questions even when my hand isn’t raised BECAUSE I DONT KNOW THE DAMN ANSWER. It’s not even my first ever finals week and I already wanna kms. Kids at school have been taking my already fucked up mental state and amplifying it to a million. I’m literally so close to relapsing that it SUCKS. Anyways, depression is sucky per usual and I’ll probs update laterz. :P

-Kai, Dec 17, 2023

[canniba1ize]

Confusion weighs me down. I don't know what time it is. I don't know where I end and the others begin. I don't know what's real and what isn't. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to spend my time. What mark do I want to leave on the world? I don't know how I'm supposed to go through life like this.

[possums-are-awesome]

(VENT/RANT PLEASE DONT READ IF YOU'RE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH VENTS/RANTS)

I wonder why people are the way that they are sometimes. Why can't people just chill out and not cause the other person/people stress.

If I say ONE bad or corny thing almost anywhere, EVERYONE comes for me. (This never happens here, thank god.)

Yeah, so I'm sorta stressed because I think I'm starting to become annoying, weird, and problematic.

Why can't people just chill and not overreact over something?? What if they didn't mean it?? (I don't mean to justify predators or gr00mers in ANY way.)

I'm 14, and I'm still learning abt well..a lot of things! Heck, I still don't know a lot of LGBT things, and I'm still willing to respect people. (just an example)

Also, if I say anything that sounds creepy or uncomfortable, please tell me nicely, at least, I will apologize and most likely try to make up for it.

I'm sorta sensitive, so pls be nice to me :(

-I don't vent a lot but yeah-

[skrimply]

does anybody know if the horrors end soon or what