#ve said any words to each other in a week

[97linelover]

Better off without me - Kim Mingyu

18+ / mdi

summary: nearly 10 years.. that´s the time you´ve been with Kim Mingyu. But what if his plans about the future are not the same as yours?

What if the guy you love the most breaks your heart within seconds?

content: Idol Mingyu x non Idol reader, fight,angst, happy end,fluff, smut

wc: 3.8 k

a/n: I really love reading your guys opinion about my stories.

They say that after 10 years, you will be together forever.

After 10 years, you'll know each other's biggest flaws.

But what if 10 years meant nothing in the end?

You met him when you were 13; you just changed schools; he was the first one to talk to you. He was your first friend.

Your first friend took you out at night.

Your first real friend.

Your first kiss.

It was your first time having sex.

This is your first real relationship.

Your first apartment together.

This is your first time saying I love you.

Your first love.

And also your first heartbreak.

Kim Mingyu was the man who pushed you away, fast and painfully.

And the worst part? You did not notice.

It has been 9 years; next week it would've been 10 years. 10 years of you two together in a relationship.

Mingyu currently spends a lot of time in the studio; they had a comeback prepared. 4 months from now on until their comeback would be there.

You had been with him for every comeback until now; you were always at the front, supporting them. Your second family.

Seungkwan always went out with you for brunch; Joshua went shopping with you; and Wonwoo just talked to you for hours.

You were sure about Mingyu being your future.

When Joshua took you out to get a manicure and pedicure, you thought of nothing; when Jeonghan took you to buy yourself a pretty dress and some heels, you felt all giddy.

When you were styled perfectly, your hair falling perfectly over your shoulder, and your make-up done, you knew tonight was the night.

And when you were sitting in front of the man you loved deeply, you carried the entire world in your eyes.

The eyes Mingyu loved so deeply.

As you were giggling along to his jokes as you sipped on your wine, your perfect manicure was present as always.

Mingyu treated you like a princess.

He treated you like he always said, „You're the one that always supported me, baby; in the end, I'll spoil you like a queen.".

Mingyu made sure you were always taken care of; even if you did not need any of it, it was his priority.

„Baby," he whispered, taking your hand in his. The music was playing softly—your favorite song. The tears were prickling in your eyes. „You can probably imagine why we are here tonight," he smiled softly. He felt something tuck inside his chest.

The velvet box in his hand was making you beam with joy, but he suddenly let his hand down. „I can't do it," he whispered, swallowing the biggest lump he ever had in his throat.

He let go of your hand, and you felt all the air leaving your lungs. "Gyu," you whispered, confused. „What do you mean?"

Mingyu got up. „I can't marry you; I can't," he whispered, placing a couple of bills on the table. „Gyu, what the fuck are you talking about?" You got up, and the red wine got knocked over. You followed him outside. „Baby, please talk to me," you pleaded, and he walked to the car.

"You can't marry me, but why this? Why the ring? Are those years not enough?" you sobbed.

„I thought they were; I'm not sure about this anymore," he was shaking.

„What do you mean by this?" You pulled his arm so that he would look at you.

„Fuck Y/N, I CANT MARRY YOU BECAUSE I FUCKING FEEL UNDER PERMANENT PRESSURE WITH YOU," he screamed at you, so that you flinched at his words.

You could not utter a word: "You... what?" Your voice was barely a whisper.

"You're better off without me. I have tried to break it off a few times now. Wonwoo told me to try it, that the engagement will light up another spark," he rubbed over his face. „I thought I'd never tell you; I thought I could pull this off," he whispered, and he avoided your gaze at all costs.

„You're joking, right?" You said with a quivering voice, „Please tell me that this is not true." You felt your knees buckle. „We don't need to get married; you don't need to lie," you basically pleaded.

„I'll pack my things; I'll be gone by tonight," he said, opening the door of his car. „You can't do this to me, Gyu; you're the love of my life." You felt the tears running down your face by now.

„We grew apart by now, Y/N," he shrugged, getting inside the car. „I'm sorry for doing it like that."

„What do you mean? What is happening? I don't understand where this is coming from; we were happy, we were perfect for each other; you really want to leave me here." You held on to the car handle.

„Please let go," he whispered.

„So you really broke me while trying to propose," you gasped, taking a step back. „You really did that," you whispered while turning around, falling to your knees and sobbing. „Please get up; don't make a scene, please," he said, and you looked up at him. „Get the fuck away from me," you spat.

How could he be this cold after all those years?

Mingyu felt his heart break, but you did not see his emotions on the inside. How could you?

Seeing you like this is the worst scenario.

„I'll let Wonwoo Hyung know to get you," he said while driving off. He parked the car somewhere he could see you getting picked up by Wonwoo. He watched how he lifted you up—your fragile, sobbing body. How he buckled you up and drove away.

He did not see how you entered the apartment or how Wonwoo followed you, making you tea.

How have you tried to call him a thousand times?

How you packed your bags and how you called your parents to tell them that your trip to Germany with Mingyu would be cancelled because he did not feel so well.

How they told you that you could come alone, and how you agreed.

How you spent the entire night crying over a man you spent all your life with, how you threw away the dress, and how you slammed all the picture frames against the wall.

When he opened the door to the apartment the next day to grab some things, he found you gone. He saw the missing suitcase, and he found a letter on his nightstand.

„Gyu,

or Mingyu, I don't even know if I can call you any pet names anymore. I really don't know what has just happened; I can't get my head around this situation. I try to find the problem; I try to think about all the possibilities of what could've happened.

We were so happy—at least I was.

You, Kim Mingyu, were the reason for my happiness and for all the beautiful moments.

You helped me become the woman I am today, and I'm thankful for that.

My mom always taught me that things happen for a reason.

I don't know what the reason is now, but I'll try to live my life.

But I hope you understand that we will never have any kind of relationship—neither friends nor lovers. You broke my heart; you had now shame and no mercy. You did not care about me in the slightest. After nearly 10 years, you dumped me like a fucking trash bag.

Kim Mingyu I want you to be happy. I want seventeen to reach all the goals you've dreamed of; you guys are amazing.

With us being separated, I need to distance myself from my second family. Because how am I supposed to hang out with your best friends? You took it all away from me, but that's okay.

I'll survive.

Please stay healthy and happy.

I love you, Mingyu, with all my heart.

Your Y/N

"P.S. tell Jihoon that he can use all the audio snippets I recorded for him."

When Mingyu finished the letter, he felt the wetness on his cheek. He was sobbing.

He had lost the only person he had ever loved.

And now you were gone; he knew you were visiting your parents. He looked at the velvet box and choked on his sob.

Maybe in another time you both will get your deserved happy ending.

But as for now, you both needed to fix your broken souls.

-

Six months have passed since you last visited Seoul.

It's been six months since you've last worked inside the office.

It's been six months since you've seen him.

SVT invited you to their release party, and you were pretty sure you would not go, but as time passed, you wanted to be there.

You missed them so badly, and you thought maybe you wouldn't even see him.

Well, you were a fool.

The first thing you saw when you entered the building was the large frame of your ex-lover. He was standing next to Chan and Jihoon.

Nice, exactly the two people you wanted to see.

But before they could see you, you walked toward the bar.

You were happy that the location was crowded and people were not paying attention. With your cocktail in your hand, you walked around looking at the different album promotion pictures.

There was this one picture you could not stop looking at; it was Mingyu in the studio. It looked normal, but as you looked closer, you could see the ring he was wearing. The one you got him as a promise ring.

„He's not doing well." A voice startled you. „Nonu," you gasped, and he chuckled. „He's miserable, Y/N. Ever since you left, he has done the bare minimum."

You sighed, "Well, he wanted that, Nonu; he was the one that pushed me away. I was sure that he would be the one I'd marry, but suddenly he did not care about a thing." You tried to end this conversation.

„It's not how it seems, Y/N; there are some parts of the story you don't know; you should talk to him," he pecked your head. „I'm really happy you're here," and with that, he walked towards some other guests.

You tried not to think about his words, but it was harder than you thought.

As you made your way through the venue, you spotted some of the boys. „Y/N!!!!" Seungkwan yelled and ran towards you. „Hi kwannie," you giggled as he hugged you tight.

Cheol and the others also greeted you, but when Mingyu was standing in front of you, his brown eyes basically pleading for forgiveness, you felt like crying.

You were quick to avoid his gaze, but you felt it on you the entire time. „Excuse me," you said to Jeonghan, „I need to get a refill." You smiled, escaping the situation. The heels made it a lot harder to walk away with fast steps. You felt Mingyus presence behind you, „Y/N," he said while stopping you.

„What do you want?" You asked with a stable voice, and he gulped down at your tone. „I want to talk," he whispered as you ordered another drink, gulping it down.

"Now you want to talk?" You scoffed, "You ditched me after nearly ten years; you treated me like a random girl. After everything I did for you," you walked past him, "I will not talk to you tonight.".

Well, now that the night had changed, you were sitting on top of Mingyu, throwing your head back while riding him like you loved to. How he guided your hips with his long, slender fingers digging into your flesh.

The familiarity of your bodies made it so easy to feel good.

"Oh god, your pussy is so good," he groaned while you moved even faster. "Oh fuck," you said, feeling yourself getting close to the end, and you were a moaning mess.

When you both reached your highs, Mingyu tossed the condom away, and you suddenly felt sober. You gathered your clothes while Mingyu cleaned himself up. "What are you doing?" he asked, confused, and you walked past him. "Hey," he said, grabbing your arm. "Let go of me," you said, ashamed of yourself.

"Please stay," he whispered, but you could only choke out a sob. "This should not have happened, Gyu," you whispered, and he felt his heart clench at your words. "You don't mean that, baby; we were so good," he pleaded, holding on to you.

feeling that if he lets you go now, you're gone forever.

"You broke me, Mingyu; I spent the last six months trying to fix what you destroyed." You pulled your arm away and said, "So no, Mingyu, I won't stay just because you decided you still wanted me." You walked away.

"I always wanted you; I could just not tell you the truth." He whispered, but you did not hear it. 

You tried your best to ignore this feeling of missing him, but you couldn't; your heart yearned for him. Kim Mingyu was the man your heart belonged to. 

With each passing day, you realize that you need to talk to him, that you need to know what happened, and that he pushed you away. 

When you heard your phone vibrating, you rushed to your desk, where it was lying. 

You saw Wonwoo's name on there: "Nonu? Is everything alright?" you asked when you answered the call. 

"I'm fine, but can you do me a favor?" You raised your eyebrows, confused. "What is it, Nonu?" 

"Come to the recording studios, please," he breathed. "What is happening there, Nonu?" You were getting nervous, and he chuckled slightly and said, "Be there by 7 p.m., please." With that, he ended the call. 

You were pretty sure this was about Mingyu, and you were ready to find out. 

So you got ready, put on some comfy pants and a hoodie, slipped on your sneakers, and rushed to the bus. 

After a 30-minute journey, you were in front of the building you once visited regularly. "Y/N, oh my, it's been a long time," Juna said with open arms, pulling you into a hug. "Yes, sorry, I was so busy." You lied, and she looked at you. "We all know what happened, love, and I can totally understand that you wanted to have some distance." She smiled softly at you.

"So, have you seen Wonwoo?" You giggled, and she nodded. "He was here; he gave me this envelope for you and told me to guide you inside." You nodded, following her. 

You sat down, opening the envelope. 

You took a deep breath when you realized it was Mingyu's handwriting.

"My beloved Y/N,  I never thought the day would come that I would need to write those words to you and that I would push you away.   The only person that I ever loved.  Y/N, there are so many things I did not tell you; I couldn't.   I did everything I could so that I could act like this did not affect me, but in the end, I suffered in silence.   The members talked to me, and they told me I'm just the corpse of myself.  And they are right; I'm barely eating and barely active; actually, I'm working out even more because it takes my mind off, even if it's just for a few minutes.  I want to tell you why I did it and why everything escalated.  It all started with our comeback. We got a new manager, a woman whose name was Heejin.  She was not nice at all; she told us dating was a no-go, and we told her that some of us were happily taken.  She just laughed at that.  After a while, she began to manipulate us; she told us that we were not good enough, and every day she told us that no one could love an idol.  I began to believe her; we all did. I wanted to bury myself in a hole; I felt like a burden. Believe me when I tell you, I wanted to propose. When I looked into your sparkling eyes that night, I felt my heart bursting with love, but then the words of Heejin came back to my mind, and I could not do it anymore.  I wanted you to be happier.  I thought I could not give you this happiness.   But god damn, baby, believe me when I tell you that you are my happiness; you're all I ever wanted.  I can't live without you; I miss you, and I need you...  Hopefully someday you can look me in the eyes again and realize how much I adore you.  I love you. 

Your  Mingyu" 

You looked up, letting the tears roll down your cheeks. You never realized how he felt, and you could scream at yourself for that. 

The TV turned on inside the small room. "And today we have Seventeens Mingyu here, covering one of the saddest heartbreak songs at the moment." 

When the melody began to play, you felt the goosebumps rising. 

He was singing Kim Feel's Someday, the Boy, your favorite song. 

- 

You were lying on the couch, your heating pad on your tummy, while Mingyu was making you a fresh peppermint tea.  It was this time of the month that every woman hated.  You were currently watching a new drama called Itaewon Class, and you could not stop the tears. "Baby, what's wrong?" Mingyu hurried over to you, but you could only sob. "Oh, baby, you're too nice; you're always crying over movies," he chuckled while pulling you closer.  "Can you someday cover this song?" You whispered, "This would be the perfect song to fix my broken heart." You looked up at him, and he softly kissed you.  "Hopefully, I never need to fix your broken heart," he said, kissing your head.

-

When you heard his deep voice singing the words of the song, you tried your best to stay strong. 

"The sad memories in my heart

I can't erase it with the tears I shed. Where should I start deleting it? Only empty laughter"

You could see the teary eyes, and you were sobbing once again. His knuckles were white from how tight he grabbed the microphone. 

"A long time in the future, that person back then

Do you have everything you dreamed of?"

He finished the song with one tear running down his cheek, and then the TV got dark. People cheered after he finished, and you could not believe it. 

You jumped up, hurrying through the corridor. "He's in there," Juna said, pointing towards the dressing rooms. In this exact moment, you knew that Mingyu was your forever, and you wanted it. 

You rushed into the room, and he looked up. "Y/N," he said breathlessly. "I read it, I watched it, and now I am a mess," you whispered, your mind completely occupied by him. 

"But I realized that I just can't move on; you are what I want." His dark brown eyes watched you carefully. "You are more than enough for me, Gyu; you are enough." You walked towards him, and he watched every move you made. 

"How can you be so understanding when I messed up our entire relationship?" He had tears in his eyes, but you only pulled him close. "Because I promised you, Mingyu, we both are the endgame," you said, wiping the tears away. "I love you," you whispered, and you kissed him softly. 

He did not hesitate one second and pulled you close while his one hand was softly in your neck. This kiss was full of desperation and love. 

You walked with him until he landed on the couch with you on top, straddling him. 

The way you undressed each other was skilled; you knew each other's bodies blindly; your whimpers were like the best song he has ever heard; and the way his tongue twirled around your hardened nipples made you crazy. 

The way you were bouncing on his dick made him lose his mind; he felt like he would go insane with every passing minute. The way you whispered in his ear how much you missed this made his eyes roll to the back of his head. 

"I'm going to cum, baby," he groaned, and you nodded. "Fill me up, please. Wanna feel it?" You moaned, and you brought him over the edge.  He held you so close that you clawed your nails into his back until you both just calmed down against each other. 

And when you both lay in his bed with only some white sheets covering your bodies, he opened his nightstand. "Marry me," he whispered into your ear, and your eyes widened, letting out a gasp. "Gyu," you said, feeling the tears in your eyes. 

"I´m so sure, like I´ve never been before; you´re all I want, and I can't wait to spend my forever with you, so Y/N, please marry me." He opened the velvet box, and you nodded. "Yes," you squealed while kissing him.

"I love you so much, baby; you make me so happy," he said while putting the ring on your finger. "Us forever, Gyu," you kissed him softly. 

[bokunoheros]

TAGS/WARNINGS: this fic will contain DARK CONTENT. MINORS DNI. AGELESS BLOGS DNI. reader and touya are childhood friends, kidnapping, reader does not consent to what touya’s doing, possessive/obsessive behavior, one-sided pain kink, no sex, no aftercare, hurt/no comfort,  this takes place after dabi broadcasts that he’s a todoroki, touya burns reader in multiple places, touya burns your clothes off, this is seriously fucked up content, this is not intended to be sexy or hot or anything like that, it’s literally just fully DARK CONTENT GENRE: DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT SUMMARY: touya intends to make you his—permanently. WORD COUNT: 1.4K 🦊’s A/N: whoa….. god help us all. this is my first seriously dark fic here and there will be plenty more to cum 💦

     “now—don’t be like that, doll,” dabi scolds you as he finishes tying off the rope at your ankles. currently, you were laying face down against the mattress, limbs pulled apart spread eagle style, blindfolded and terrified.

     when you were on your way home earlier tonight, you weren’t exactly expecting to be kidnapped in broad daylight. maybe it was your fault for taking that shortcut through that shadyass alley…. goddammit. now, you had no one to blame but your own dumb ass.

     what you weren’t aware of, however, was the fact that touya had been stalking you for weeks now—waiting for the perfect time to snatch you up. you see, he’d always had a bit of a crush on you since you were always there for him when you were children, someone whom he actively sought solace in. so, now that you were both adults and his feelings had time to simmer and intensify, he found himself thinking about you obsessively—he thought of you as something he just had to have; something akin to a doll he had to mark as his. and that’s exactly what he’d do.

     “please…. let me go!” you cry, tears dampening the cloth obstructing your vision. “i— i have — have to get home! i have people waiting for me!” you lie, wiggling around on the bed.

     he had taken you to some abandoned home—the family already dead and gone weeks ago, as touya had been planning this exact scenario for months now. and he finally has you exactly where he’s dreamt you’d be: struggling beneath him as he marks you as his permanently. 

     “that’s a lie and we both know that, sweets,” he spits out. “‘ve been watchin’ you for a while now, y’know…” suddenly his lips are right next to your ear, hot breath fanning over the shell of it as a chill runs down your spine. 

     “but, i’ll tell ya what: if y’can guess who i am, i’ll let you go free. sound good?” he proposes, meaning his words—he knows you’ll come crawling back to him once he’s through with you. you wouldn’t have any other choice, really!

     that being said, he activates his quirk on his hand and sets flame to the button down shirt you wore, and as a result, your bra as well, making you cry out painfully as the overwhelming heat consumes your upper body for a few long moments. …and then just like that, it’s gone and you’re left in just the stupid skirt you’d decided to wear today and your panties.

     now, with his quirk active on just his index finger, he brings it down to your naked lower back where he begins to spell out his name—his real name. 

     he did it tortuously slowly, though. taking his sweet time to make sure you could feel the stroke of each letter so that there would be no mistaking who he was.

     T…

     it’s all you can do to scream and bite down on the pillow by your head. the heat was beyond blistering, and you think you might pass out as he agonizingly traces the letters of his name.

     O…

     “jesus christ, owow–OW—OW–! fuck!” you scream-sob, tears streaming down your flushed cheeks from the searing pain as he mockingly praises you for being so brave. 

     U…

     suddenly, the realization of who he might be clicks amidst the pain, and it’s all you can do to cry; “t–touya!? b–but why?” 

     he doesn’t stop writing as he grins so widely, he pops a couple staples—the ones closest to his mouth—and continues spelling out his name before deciding to answer you.

     Y… A…

     perfect….. his handwriting wasn’t exactly the best, but it was undoubtedly his. just like you were.

     the last you’d seen him was on the news when he dropped the metaphorical bomb that was him being the eldest todoroki sibling. and before that? the night he supposedly “died.” so, not only was finding out he’s been alive this whole time a slap in the face, but now he has the audacity to kidnap and brand you? like you’re a piece of property!?

     “why?” he rasps out. “it’s pretty simple, really. …because you’re the only one who understands me—”

      “n–no! t– touya, this isn’t—” isn’t what? this isn’t him? this isn’t right? the touya you were once familiar with perished long ago and so had his morals.

     his hand comes down to strike against your ass with an awful, burning force, and you swear there’s an immediate handprint that forms. 

     your back arches instinctively, forcing your stomach firmly against the mattress, in attempt to escape his blazing touch, but touya doesn’t give you time to recover before he’s bringing the same hand down again, with just as much force and firepower as before, and you yelp loudly as you squirm against your restraints.

     “pl– please–! why me?”

     “i just told you—don’t tell me your memory’s that bad?” he quirks a brow up at 

      it’s true that you’d had a crush on the man now known as dabi back in your youth, but that crush died when touya did, forcing you to mourn both him and the feelings you harbored towards him. and now he comes back from the dead like nothing? did he even try to seek you out in all this time? 

     he had, actually, at multiple points; little “check ins”of sorts, if you will. observing from a distance, too scared to reach out.

     “n–no! ‘s’not! i just—! ow! fuck! touya, please!” 

     “you what?” he snaps, spanking your other asscheek this time.

     “fuck! ow–! touya, please! please!”

     his hand comes down again, harder and hotter than before and you bite your tongue so hard it starts to bleed, filling your mouth with an almost sickening coppery taste. rather than swallow it, you spit it out onto the bed, as far away from your face as you can manage, and touya laughs at the pathetic sight. 

     “you poor thing,” he coos mockingly. “maybe i should’ve given you something to bite down on—...oh well, it’s too late now,” he laughs cruelly as another idea comes to mind. next, he thinks he’ll carve the characters of his name into your back, rather than just the romaji writing, and right between your shoulder blades at that. 

     “t–tou—touya, i—” you swallow thickly, unable to think of anything but the pain, or if you’d ever get to go home again after this. part of you almost wishes he would just kill you so you wouldn’t have to live with this mark of him for the remainder of your life.  

     “you—” he cuts you off, “are not going to like what happens next.” there’s an inflection of sorts in his voice—he sounds… like he found humor in his own words, like whatever was about to happen next would be funny. 

     he sets flame to his pointer finger again and brings the searing digit down against your flesh, and the smell that arises as he carefully takes his time with each stroke of the characters needed to spell his name—even going as far as to use his former surname todoroki in the spelling, just to make it that much more agonizing for you.

     轟。。。

     you wail and bite onto the pillow, staining it with your blood, as touya burns your flesh for his own entertainment.

     燈。。。

     矢。。。

     there. now he could be done with you until you inevitably decided to seek him out—too embarrassed and full of shame to continue living amongst normal citizens; after all, being branded by a well-known villain and then being set free into society like it never even happened is sure to take a toll on one’s mind. 

     what are you gonna do? call the police? tell a pro? show them your new scars as evidence? the idea is laughable. 

     “there—we’re all done,” he says, leaning over your trembling form to burn the ropes binding your trembling form to the bed, quickly followed by the ones tied around your ankles. “i’m a man of my word, so you’re free to go,” he says with a deviant, slightly crooked smirk. 

     rather than immediately booking it, you curl up tightly into a ball as your body’s wracked with heavy, heaving sobs, processing the physical and mental pain as touya just chuckles at your pathetic self, getting up from the bed and putting his hands in his pockets.

     “well, see ya around,” he says, walking off as if he didn’t have a care in the world, leaving you to cope with your situation and what happens next.

return to KINKTOBER | LEAGUE OF VILLAINS M.LIST

[babygirlwritessmut]

♡︎ part1. my new roommate

・❥・pairing: vi (arcane) x fem!reader

・❥・ summary: you`ve got a new roommate as you moved for uni, you are trying to built a descent relationship with her but she is stubborn. the main problem is that she makes you really nervous.

・❥・ genre: grumpy x sunshine

・❥・ word count: 2k

✎ warnings: drug use (weed), smoking, swearing

RIDE ON ME masterlist

after moving to another city for university, you found out that there was no room in the dormitory and you were put on the waiting list. the dormitory staff reported that the approximate waiting time for a place in a room is about 2-3 months. unfortunately, you weren't accepted to the university right away due to problems with documents, so booking a bed beforehand didn't make any sense, because you could be refused by university at any time.

however, everything has its advantages, living in your own apartment provided those: you cannot worry about the curfew, your things will not suddenly disappear, smoking was not prohibited, although you tried to rid yourself of this disgusting habit - periodic slips were not an exception, unfortunately.

that's why you decided to find a place to stay a week before the train to the new city. either housing on the outskirts of the city, which would entail an hour and a half to get to the university or renting for two – that’s your options that would fit your budget. so, the neighbor it is. you tried to reassure yourself that this is also better than a dormitory, in your case you could at least choose a roommate...

after several days of searching, you came across an ad in which it was stated that a 23-year-old female is looking for a roommate, the apartment has 2 bedrooms and a kitchen, there are appliances, shared utilities. according to the map, it was only 20 minutes away from the university. isn't that great? you immediately responded to the ad and a girl named Vi gave you all the necessary details. if you only knew how much she would change your life.

--------------------------------------------------------

"I'll be there in 15 minutes. see you later" - you sent a text to your future roommate, exhaling from tension, you were nervous before meeting her. she wasn't very chatty on text, you didn't even see her pic, if it wasn't for the verified website, you'd think you were walking into a trap for some pervert.

"no, no, come on, she's probably just very quiet, it`s even for the better, you won`t disturb each other" - you thought to yourself - "no need to make myself nervous, this is a new step in my life and I'm sure that everything will be great"

after you arrived at the station of a new city, your phone vibrated. this is a text from Vi - "ok".

“are the letters expensive or something?” - you said, pushing your suitcase, the poor thing's wheels came apart from the load of the amount of your things.

indeed, exactly 15 minutes later, you were standing at the door of your new apartment, but you could feel an unpleasant excitement throughout your body. you were so tense that the air could be cut around you, exhaling slowly, you mumbled under your breath

“hello Vi, I'm your new neighbor, it's nice to finally meet you in person”, “hello Vi, I'm your new neighbor..”. "enough, why am I nervous at all, it's not that we're going to actually live together, I might not even see her, all day at university, after that I have a job to find, she's just the girl in the next room"

after another minute of self-soothing speech, you finally knocked.

“it`s open” - a voice from inside, somewhat breathless, you noticed. you entered the apartment, from the threshold you smelled the mixture of sweat and weed, this aroma was so unexpected that you thought for a second about whether you had come in the right place. a moment later a muscular figure appeared in front of you, a rather stocky girl with short pink hair was looking at you, she was a little sweaty, her hands were tied with bandages that go under boxing gloves. it's not at all what you expected...

“are you going to keep staring or will you finally come in?” - the girl turned to you a little annoyed

“yes, yes.. hello, Vi, I'm your new neighbor, it's nice to finally...” - you started to say the already prepared phrase with a strained smile, but you were immediately interrupted.

“I know who you are, come in and close the door behind you”

rude.

“follow me, I'll show you your room and the kitchen," - Vi said and immediately went to the left of the exit. out of anticipation, you didn't even take off your outer clothes, but immediately ran after her. the tour took only 30 seconds, you realized that you definitely won't communicate more than you did by text.

“thank you, and your room is on the right of the exit then?” - you asked, trying to keep the same tight smile on your face.

Vi's eyebrow arched – “well, obviously, I see you are smart” - she threw the phrase with painful sarcasm. - "any other questions or can I go now?"

“no, that's all, thanks...” you answered slowly as your smile faded from your face.

“I'll be in my room, if the music disturbs you - knock twice” - you just managed to nod in response. left alone in the middle of your empty room, you felt that you would definitely not become friends.

after such a "warm reception" you decided to start unpacking, before that you cleaned the entire room and the toilet. Vi's music was really playing loudly the whole time, but somehow the thought of making a remark about it scared you a little. after an hour of unpacking, you finally looked around your room.

“very cozy, a few string lights, posters and it will be just like at home” - you were very proud of what you did, but your thoughts were interrupted by a rumbling in your stomach. no one canceled dinner, that's when you had a brilliant idea. even though Vi is not very friendly at first glance, you decided to follow your grandmother's advice - good food always brings people together. after a quick trip to the store, you came home with all the ingredients for pasta carbonara.

"an Italian dinner in less than half an hour is perfect." when all the ingredients were ready - you started cooking, until suddenly you felt this scent again... weed, so it`s treu then, she does smoke in the apartment, this was not in the ad. not that it really bothers you, but actually you just wish you did too.

half an hour later, everything was ready, you found the dishes and necessary utensils, prepared everything for two and went to Vi's door. your palms were a little sweaty from nervousness, for some reason before every thought that there would be even minimal communication with Vi – you were nervous. you stopped in front of the door and as soon as you thought to knock, for some reason you started to worry even more. you started to rub your hands together and shuffle a little, when all of a sudden, the music in the room stopped.

“do you understand that I see you standing outside my room?” - Vi's voice in almost half a tone sounded from the door.

"fuck, there is a gap under the door. this is so embarrassing" - you flinched

“yes, um, sorry, I didn't want to distract from... what whatever you are doing there... well, I prepared dinner... for the two of us. yes. and I would be very happy if you would join me” - you said with a smile, as if she could see you.

the pause of a few seconds seemed like an eternity as the door opened in front of your face and Vi's figure appeared in front of you close enough that you could feel her smell.

“why?” - this question confused you a little.

“well, I want to get to know you, I already understood that we will not communicate closely, but we will still share this apartment, so I think that this time will be useful for us” - you said with your head raised, you wanted to look confident, even though everything was trembling inside you.

unexpectedly for you, Vi smiled a little to herself. just now you noticed what a beautiful face she has, thick eyebrows, little tattoo, deep eyes and an attractive smile, her lips were like... "hey, enough, what am I thinking?" - you stopped yourself.

“ok”

“what?” - you returned to reality.

“dinner. ok. I'll be there in two minutes” - Vi closed the door in front of your face again.

"everything went well... I think..." - you began to reassure yourself, because at least she did agree.

exactly two minutes later Vi came to the kitchen, since there was no table for some reason, you sat down with a plate on the soft sofa in front of the TV. your roommate slowly walked over to the stove that had the food on it, while she was putting food for herself, you got a chance to get a closer look at her. she has a tattoo, it was very hot, the whole back was very well painted, Vi herself was wearing a white tank top that allowed you to admire her muscles a little better. you watched her muscles move depending on what she was doing, how her rather large hands handled the kitchen a little awkwardly. you smiled at this fact, and began to stare at her hands more carefully. they were so big, you started to wonder how they would feel on your body...

“like what you see?” - Vi smirked.

you snap back to reality, this is the third time in a day you're staring, what's going on?

“yes... NO! I mean, yes, but…” - you blushed - “I'm just thinking about what kind of sport you do” – "great, and who is the possible pervert here now?"

Vi smiled again - “boxing, there is a punching bag in my room” - she liked the reaction she made on you.

at dinner you spoke little, but you spoke, it`s a beginning. she didn't tell much, she mainly asked where you came from, what university you're going to and what major.

“international relations, ha. why am I not surprised?" Vi laughed. her laugh was also attractive, just great, you were already nervous around her, now that is added to your list.

“what is this supposed to mean? why are you laughing?” - you asked in surprise.

“your approaches to people and the way you communicate are very... diplomatic,” - Vi admitted.

“thanks, I think...”

after Vi finished her portion, she was about to leave, when you called her – “and what about dessert?”

“I'm already full, but thank you” - "that smile again, why does it affect me so much" - you thought.

you went to the fridge and took a cupcake, then handed it to Vi, hoping she wouldn't notice how you blushed – “maybe you'll want something sweet at night” - you said with a smile, looking into her eyes.

“yes” - Vi looked at you with that smirk again  – “I might want to”

she took the dessert from your hands, your fingers touched each other for a few seconds, you felt as if you were electrocuted. how can a person you saw for the first time in your life evoke so many feelings? after a short silence, you decided that you should go to bed earlier, because tomorrow is an important day.

“okay, I'm glad you liked dinner, I'll clean up and go to bed, I have to go to university tomorrow, so if possible, don't turn on the music loudly” - you took your eyes off Vi.

“fine. good night, cupcake” - Vi's eyes looked at you with a smile and went to her room, closing the door behind her.

“cupcake?”

[softstarlite]

The Casualty of Love

CHAPTER 4

Summary: He's back home. You have almost forgotten how warm his eyes were and how big your crush for him was.

Warnings: Age gap (Javi is 40 and reader is 27), dry humping, kissing, mentions of mental health, mild insecurity from reader, cockblocking. (let me know if I left out any warnings)

Rating: +18 (a little explicit)

Word Count: 2k

Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Masterlist

A/N: Here's chapter 4 guys!! Hope you enjoy it. None of my work is beta read, so there might be some mistakes or things like that. Remember that english isn't my first language; feel free to help me improve but always been kind.

Divider by @saradika-graphics

Javier makes his way through the backyard to where his dad is; before talking, he takes a deep breath “Pops, i'm heading out” the fingers on the hand by his side fidgeting.

“Already Javier? You haven't lasted even two hours this time…” Chucho sighs while putting the plate of barbacued chicken down.

“Yeah, pops, you know I hate these things…” he says, not meeting Chucho´s eyes.

“You didn't seem to be having the worst of times in there” Chucho points to the house with his head.

At Chucho´s comment, anxiety takes control over Javier´s body; maybe his dad did see something, what if he was too lost in your beautiful eyes and lips to notice?

“You both always knew how to comfort each other” Chucho continues after the lack of speaking from Javier “She always knew that you needed to get away from crowds at these things, so when you eventually disappeared, she just would lie to your mama and Maria, saying that you were at the bathroom or something else that would make them not come looking for you”

“Well, it seems we´ve spent way too long apart” Chucho observes that Javi´s feet have started to fidget and he worries “You think someone could drive you later? I wouldn't want to stop your fun” Javier´s eyes finally meet Chucho´s, making his dad even worry more for him when he sees anxiety in them.

“Javier, is everything okay? I don't mind going home already if you´re not fine… it's not like they don't make one of these every week or two weeks” Chucho says, ready to get up from his chair and leave.

“No, no, pops i'm fine, just a little overwhelmed, that's it” he calms his dad, reaching a hand out to stop him from getting up.

“You sure?” Javi nods to reassure him “well then okay, i'll ask someone to give me a ride back later” he looks at Javi as serious as he can now “call Doña Lucia´s home phone if you need anything, the number is on the phone book that's in the kitchen, okay mijo?”

“Yes pops, i will if i need to” he pats Chucho´s shoulder once and then turns towards the fence door to go back towards the truck.

When Javi left the inside of the house at first fear took hold of your body, fear of rejection, fear of him avoiding you in regret of what could've happened if his dad had not come in. Soon that fear becomes anger, at him for just stomping out of the situation without acknowledgment, anger of you or the situation, or both for that matter.

As you said, you´re not a teeneager anymore, you´re not letting him do this, specially him; any other man would be a disappointment but they would just disappear from your life eventually, but him, even if you wanted to get him out of your life, which you think you would never want, it would never work, Chucho was your family and you would never abandon him and your mom was his family as well.

You hop off the kitchen counter, put the beer in your hand down, not caring even the slightest about it now, and go through the house towards the front door. You step out onto the front porch, your eyes survey the front of the house, searching for the truck you´ve known for many years now, through the sea of cars from the people who have come to the get together. As soon as you see it, you walk to it and see that no one is inside of it yet.

You know him, you know he's going to try to run from the situation, so he's going to come to the truck eventually. You lean into the driver's door, crossing your arms over your chest; right now you don't even care about the killing heat from the sun shooting straight at you from above or that your shoes are forgotten somewhere in the backyard.

Your mind goes through a million things you want to tell him when he comes but as soon as your ears pick up on the sound of the fence door by the side of the house, you are not sure what you want to tell him, insecurity hurts your chest. What if he was actually going to shove you back before Chucho came in instead of leaning in?

You can hear him curse when he sees you there leaning into his truck.

“Vampirita…” he says when he stops about two big strides from you, his tone pleading.

“No, don't vampirita me” you uncross your arms, letting them fall at your sides “you´re not running away from this, i'm not letting you”

He takes one stride towards you, but still he's not as close as you want him, as you need him “this,” he points at the air between you “can't happen”

A twinge of pain crosses your chest and one of your hands shoots to it like it could physically take it away “why not?” you know your eyes are already glossy, the fear of rejection you had before is now becoming a real thing. You feel like a little kid right now, and you're hating yourself for it.

“Because you…you are you and i'm me, cariño” he makes the attempt to touch you but he stops himself halfway.

You scoff “what an amazing argument Javier” you take a little step towards him, still leaving some distance between you two “I don't know if you´ve notice, but we are both consent adults”

“Trust me, cariño, i ́ve definitely noticed it'' his eyes can't help to run your body “that is the problem”

“Then…” you break the space between you both, your fingers caressing his upper arm “kiss me, please”

Please, you just said please, to him… Javier closes his eyes hard, feeling the cord of control inside of him tense more and more every second you stand there in front of him, your fingers touching him even over his white short sleeved button up.

“Javi…” he opens his eyes after hearing you “please…”

And just like that the cord of self control snaps; one of his hands goes straight to tangle into your hair, the other takes home in your lower back. His lips collide with yours; the sweetest honey he's ever had.

He kisses you like his life depends on it, it starts slow and sweet, but after a moment it becomes hungry. You open your mouth, an invitation to him, and he can't help but groan as his tongue meets yours.

He feels one of your hands fist the front of his button up by his stomach, the other palm flat in his chest, where his buttons are open.

Javier can't think of a moment that felt more in peace and right in his life, even if guilt was eating him from inside. He has kissed many people during his life but right now he felt like this was his first kiss ever.

You felt fire inside of you. You had thought about what kissing him would be like a million times since you were a teenager but no imagination would ever come close to how the real thing feels like. You feel his entire body pressed against yours, his warm hand on your lower back drawing you more into him, if it was possible; his desire for you reassured by the feeling of his bulge against you.

When his lips travel from your own lips to your jaw and then your neck, you can't help but let a soft moan out. As soon as it leaves your mouth you feel him slightly biting your pulse point. You pull at the curls on the nape of the back of his neck and your hips can't help to seek some friction to relieve the ache at your core; his thigh now in between your own two.

Just after the first roll of your hips, you both can hear your mother calling from you just from the other side of the front door of the house.

“Mija, are you in here?” she asks while pushing open the front door. You and Javier pull away from each other faster than you´ve ever moved before.

“Oh there you both are ¿Tu padre me dijo que se iba mijo? (your dad told me that you´re leaving son?)” she asks Javier when she´s in front of you; Javi hasn't turned around towards her yet, too afraid since the front of his jeans are tented still. Your mom looks between you two with a confused face.

“Si, ma. (yes, mom) I was just accompanying him to the truck in case there was any car blocking the way, you know, to alert the owner if it was the case” you hope your lie is believable enough. She looks at you now.

“Está ruborizada, mija. Debería alejarse del sol un rato (You're flustered daughter. You should stay away from the sun for a bit)” she tells you with a worried look on her face, always the protective mother.

“I will ma” you answer thanking all the gods above that she doesn't question the situation.

She looks at Javier, who is still not facing her, and looks at you again. She mouths to you, pointing with her head at Javier, “is he okay?”. You take the opportunity and shake your head no, better for her to worry a little about him and think that you´re both here because he's not okay and you´re comforting him, that she thinks that you may be doing what you were actually doing just moments ago.

She nods and then says “well, i'll see you another day mijo, cuídese (take care)” she then returns to the party through the fence door.

You know he's fighting against his own mind again, so you talk before he gets the opportunity to convince himself of anything.

“Hey, we haven't done anything wrong. So, stop that thought” you say quickly, grabbing his face between your hands, making him look at you straight into your eyes.

“Yeah? Are you sure about that, vampirita? Because I feel like an asshole that took advantage of the daughter of the woman that raised him alongside his own mom” he confesses to you with an angry look on his face, but you know his anger is not towards you but to himself.

“Advantage? Again, I'm a consenting adult and that was a consented kiss for sure. If anyone would ever be forced into a kiss it would be you not me” you let his face go when you start saying the last part.

His hands are the ones now framing your face “Cariño, i wanted that kiss the same as you if not more” he makes you look at him into his eyes, so you can read him just like always “Dios (God) I'm going to hell” he tells more to himself than to you “I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since we saw each other on that parking lot” you can see only truth and longing in his eyes.

You put your hands over his on your cheeks “Well then that makes two of us” you let out a little chuckle “we could try this… keep it between us until we know it´ll work…” you look at him with hope in your eyes.

Javier can't help but let out a big sigh “every bone in me tells me to not let happen any of this, but i don't think i´ve ever been able to tell you no, vampirita” you can't help your face from forming the biggest smile you´ve ever had, you launch into him and wrap your arms around him, then you kiss him again.

Next chapter

[betweenthejawsoffate]

I Will Shelter You All the Same (Sleep Token IV/Band)

IV hasn't been in the band long, only a few months, but a few things he knew for sure. 

Sleep was real

He was replaceable 

There was something most definitely going on between his bandmates

Read on AO3 here or below

He was well aware there were many before him, and even more aware that he wouldn't be the last. Though in the back of his mind he had always hoped that he would be. They had assured him many times that he was “their Ivy” the last. But isn't that what they said about the previous fours? 

The position seemed to be cursed with a revolving door of guitarists, while the core main three had always remained strong and steadfast. Not only bonded by their position in the band, or their servanthood towards Sleep, but also a deep personal connection. When IV had first moved into the manor they had hid most of it from him; but he was not dumb. Years of observing in the shadows had made him quiet and meek but not unobserving. Soft touches that lasted a little too long, quiet feet padding to the others rooms late at night. That and the fact that III was not a quiet man in any sense of the word, and it seems in many regards. 

IV was sitting on his bed reviewing some tabs when he first heard THAT, muffled through the manor walls but distinct nevertheless. At first he wasn't sure what the gentle knocking at the wall was, a constant and on time. He had almost confused it for II practicing keeping time, as if he would need practice of such a basic skill. Putting the tabs down he leaned into the wall to listen a bit closer. A high pitched whine soon followed the steady beat. IV launched himself away from the wall, his hand meeting his mouth to cover the sound of surprise. He knew the others were close, sure. He even suspected some sort of romantic entanglement between Vessel and II. But the whine was so clearly III and that wall was the one he shared with II. The steady beat began to change in tempo, the sound more clearly heard through the shared wall. The sound increasing, IV frantically began to search through the boxes that still littered his room for his head phones. Putting them tightly over his head, turning the volume as much higher then was probably safe for his ears; IV laid back down onto his bed tabs long forgotten. 

The next morning was quieter than normal. II typically  was up making tea in the kitchen but clearly he had been occupied the night before and had not surfaced. So instead IV set to work warming the kettle, pulling out each of their respective mugs before scanning the fridge for something to make for breakfast. It was fairly empty, a few eggs left over from III’s attempt of baking last week and some thick cut bacon Ves & him had picked up at the local markets; it was enough to make a meal for this morning at least. He got to quick work whisking up the eggs falling deep into thought at the repetitive behavior. 

IV didn't want the others to feel like they had to hide whatever was going on from him. It was clear that their affections went further than long term bandmates, but whatever that was he wasn't sure. If you had asked him yesterday morning he would have bet money on II & Ves being a thing, but this thing with III? He wasn't sure how that played out. IV had been in many bands before Sleep Token and none of them had… slept together the way this one seems to do. Not that he saw anything wrong with that, IV had a gay cousin or two back in his old life. He didn't see anything wrong with that aspect of his band mates relationship, was that what it was? He wasn't sure. IV let out a soft sign at the thought of that, no need to dwell on the past now, especially when his future still felt so up in the air. 

“Morning IV” came out a quiet hum from behind him.

IV had never been so thankful for the cloth masks that Vessel had insisted they wore then he was right now. A dark red blush slashed his face, ran down to his chest, running so warm he swore if II was just a little closer he would have felt it through the fabric. 

Of course he knew it was II that had kept III company the previous night, with his room having the shared wall and the normally early riser absent from his normal morning breakfast duties, it made sense. But logistically knowing this and facing the cause of the sounds he had heard last tonight were too different things entirely. The thump of the bed hitting IV’s wall, the repetitive high pitched whines that quickly became too loud for even headphones to muffle out, and oh god the memory of words shared between the two- IV had to stop he should not be thinking about his band mates like that. 

II moved to the collection of mugs IV had set on the counter earlier that morning, quietly inspecting the content of each. 

“Ves likes one sugar not two” II offhandedly corrected quickly, fishing out the extra cube, throwing it into III’s mug before moving to pour the boiling kettle. 

“Oh” IV simply answered, of course he knew that he was the one that often made their afternoon teas. But it seemed that all common sense had flown out the window this morning; all IV could think about was avoiding the gaze of II just a mere feet away from him. 

Get yourself together. Whatever happened last night was no different then the times in Uni when he had walked in on his roommate or the times on tour with his previous band; when the long weeks away from home would finally catch up on them. It was more common than you would think, to accidentally hear a fellow bandmate late at night going for a covert wank. He had never been this awkward about it then so why was this bothering him so much now?

II eyed IV carefully, “You alright IV?” This time II’s voice was much clearer and closer. 

Pulled from his thoughts IV yanked his head up and back looking straight at his band mate now standing just behind him. 

“Of course II” he added a little laugh at the end 

“Not much of a morning person thats all” It wasn't necessarily a lie, but II had a way of seeing past his band mates bullshit better then anyone else. 

II watched him closely, taking in the details on what very little of his face was visible behind their masks. Squinting his eyes slightly, before giving a small sign and gesturing to the spatula in IV hand. 

“Hand it over, your burning the eggs” 

IV didn't argue quickly, giving up the job to the admittedly, much better cook.

Pouring his and II teas in the meantime before settling down at the table. A calm silence filled the kitchen. 

The smell of food brought the others down. Vessel first, entering the kitchen pulling the arms of his hoodie over his hands, making a beeline straight for the mugs still resting on the kitchen counter before joining IV at the table without a single word. It was best to let him decide when to be perceived in the mornings, he was often up late composing or on rather tough evenings kept awake by dreams from Sleep. They all sat in a comfortable silence as II finished cooking up their meager breakfast, plating portions for each of them. They didn't wait for III as they began their meal together, he was usually the last of them to get up but typically the smell of food and the light morning chatter would drag him out of bed. They had barely begun when the distinct steps of III bouncing down the hallway stairs could be heard from the kitchen. III bursting into the kitchen, hand reaching for the grab the back of II then Vessel chairs leaning down to kiss their respective checks. 

This type of affection wasn't uncommon from III, he was a touchy guy often including IV both on and off stage. But with the memory still fresh in IV’s brain, it began to feel different. If it was just a platonic peak, why hadn't III also kissed his cheek? A strange feeling began to tangle itself in his chest, sneaking up his throat. It was a stupid thought in the first place, why would III want too? He was IV, not Vessel or II. He was there to play guitar and help around the house until he had run his usefulness dry and adventally when he had, they would replace him with another. Just like his previous bands had, just how his ex had, and just as Sleep Token had done before with the other IV’s. He didn't want to think why he wanted III to include him in these moments of intimacy like he did with the others but the thought had been creeping up on him for weeks. All coming to a head with the stupid sounds he heard the night prior. Fuck he couldnt stop thinking about them. 

II watched IV carefully from the other side of the table, while IV had been known to be quiet he was unusually so. Two hands gripping his mug taking slow sips of his tea, meal left untouched with a far away look in his eyes. II knew something was up, and he feared he knew exactly what was on the other man's mind. Turning his attention to III and Vessel he saw the two in a heated discussion about III recent outfit choices during the rituals. III always wanted to express himself more on stage while Vessel wanted little to distract the audience from their worship. An argument that they had had nearly once a week for months. Neither seem to be picking up on the shifting energy coming from their newest guitarist. 

They had been less and less discrete with their relationship as of recently. Testing the waters to see how IV would handle it. Maybe that had been a mistake? He had been respectful so far, not making comments about their flirty comments to each other or how sometimes their actions would push a little past plutonic. But it had been so long since II had been able to be open with his affection to his partners, he had begun to feel pent up. That and the constant teasing from III the previous night had come to a head, and while he relished being with one of his partners again. He also knew they had been careless. IV had clearly heard them; what else would explain the sudden change of personality. Gods, IV wouldn't even look at him. II turned back towards IV when he heard the scratch of their old kitchen chair sliding back. He watched the small man dump the remainder of his tea in the sink, pushing his untouched meal onto III’s plate before silently disappearing through the kitchen door. Vessel stared after him in confusion, half rising out of the chair before II had ushered him back down into his seat. 

“Give him some time, Ves.” A deep look of confusion covered Vessel’s face at II’s words. 

“III spent the night with me last night, things..” 

he paused a second trying to find the right words to explain to the first without making him feel left out.

 “...got a bit carried away. We share a wall…” ending the sentence with a little twist of his wrist hoping he understood what he was getting at. 

“Oh. I see.” Vessel simply said.

It was III who quickly butt in next. Hugging Vessel from behind and nuzzling his check into his neck. “I’m sorry baby, it wasn't like that. I know we said we would step back from those sort of things while IV got more acquainted with us, but it just kinda happened.”

Lifting his hand up to III’s check gently rubbing it Vessel shook his head slightly.

“I’m not mad or upset at you guys. I’m glad you had some time together, it's been too long. I’m just worried it's too soon. Fore was so upset with us when he left and IV has just finished learning the songs. We don't have time to find another replacement before tour.”

Surprisingly it was III that took a scolding tone, “Don’t talk like that Ves. We don't know what he heard and he didn't say anything this morning, right?” Vessel hummed uncommitted in his  response, turning slightly to catch III lips with his own seeking physical comfort from his partner. 

Pulling away after a few moments III continued, “Plus it’s IV, our Ivy. This is not like the others and you know it. Sleep is pleased with this addition Vessel, She wants him here as much as we all do. I can feel it; he belongs here, he belongs with us.”

 Vessel was not used to III chastising him in this manner, he was right of course this IV was different then the rest. It was an immediate connection they all had felt. It was the same feeling as when III had joined him and II. It was that connection that scared Vessel, they could not lose this IV like the others. They had to play it slow and safe. 

 Leaving the kitchen IV went straight to his room, kicking aside dirty clothes and half filled boxes in search of his gym trainers. A walk he had decided was what he needed to clear his mind. Get out of the house away from the boys, the stale air of the manor, and the never ending confusion he had been drowning in the past 12 hours. It didn't take long to find them, sitting on top of a box in a far corner of his room. Slipping them on he began quietly down the stairs towards the kitchen; with the intention of letting them know he was going for a run.

It was Vessel’s voice he heard first- “... IV has just finished learning the songs”

Were they talking about him? IV paused at the door listening for a moment longer. 

“We don’t have time to find another replacement before tour”. 

The breath caught in IV’s throat, he knew it. He fucking knew it. Stuffing his headphone into his ears, he shuffled out the door. He wasn't going to stand there and listen to what he knew was already true. He was replaceable. He had to try harder. No wonder they hid their soft touches from him, He was not worthy. 

Turning down their street IV begun to run.

[assortedvillainvault]

Hello! If it's okay to request/ask, headcannon of TFA Blitzwing (each of his personalities) x Reader? Reader has a split or multiple personality. Kinda like Jekyll and Hyde (but sometimes a softie w/ close/loved ones, family/friends), if you're familiar with it. Can be Romantic and/or platonic…

(Gender-neutral/Female) Reader's a human and they aren't involved with any cybertronians situations…

(PS. Thank you if you answer this! if not, I'll enjoy your stuff either way.)

Hi Anon! I’ve been thinking about this one for a while! Sorry for the wait, I have a little bit of history with DID (as in I don’t suffer personally, but have been close with others that do), so wanted to get this one right. Blitwing was unironically a comfort character originally due to said struggles and trying to strike a balance between ‘funky space-german giant robot villain’ and ‘this is a serious real life condition with a lot of misinformation and prejudices’ can get a tad challenging.

Anyhoo, Long post alert. DID is discussed but no real warnings for this one. Lets go!

Blitzwing x DID!Reader

- DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) results in humans having multiple, distinct personalities – from as few as 3 or 4 (like our favourite triplechanger) to up to 100 in some cases. The Jekyll & Hyde - esque nature of yours is something you’re at least slightly grateful for – at least it’s simple!

- Granted, it doesn’t really help when your city is attacked by giant space robots. Repeatedly. Every week. Both personalities agree it’s a pain in the neck – switching out and coming-to mid war zone with no warning isn’t exactly relaxing.

- Your first meeting was very subtle. Crawled behind overturned cars and bridge rubble, ducking down as the buildings behind you were ripped up with a squeal of steel and concrete. An enormous giant tank/plane/robot shaking the ground, hollering with rage at a bright yellow little car zooming in the distance.

- “JOU PATHETIC LITTLE BUG!! I’LL - cUt JoU iNtO iTTy BiTtY stReaMerS!! HAhAha vE’re gOnNa haVe a PaRty – at jour base, perhaps, now zat ve know where it is, Autobot~”

- You couldn’t believe your fucking eyes -

- “Holy Shit SAME HAT?!”

- Red eyes snap to your dumbfounded expression, narrowing.

- Yeah. Maybe hollering it across no mans land wasn’t the smartest move.

Icy:

- He had no idea his affliction could be shared with organics. He didn’t even realise he was witnessing DID at first as you can’t literally switch faces. Come to think of it – I’m not sure cybertronians even have a word for it. He adopts your terms like a duck to water.

- Of the three he’s the most fascinated observer. He’s quick to document any minor tone shifts or facial expressions to indicate a switch between your two personalities – as well as the speed at which you change, your stressors and mannerisms. He can’t imagine dealing well if someone were to – somehow – get his alters mixed up, so he takes pains to greet both personalities properly.

- Is more likely the one to ask questions and approach the subject scientifically: though he will back off if the ‘Jekyll’ personality gets in his face about being treated like a science experiment. He knows the feeling and despises it.

- Just because he’s calm about it though, doesn’t mean he’s moralistic. Icy has a known sadistic streak and enjoys setting up situations to hurt people (see: the almost-murder of the Constructobots) so he’d be… intrigued to see how far your aspects were willing to go. He’s an enabler of destructive behaviour that specialises in not getting you caught.

Hothead:

- Hothead, by contrast – is much more reactive: blunt and easily confused.

- He will likely get your alters mixed up and become flustered and annoyed until he gets the hang of who is presenting when. Give him a bit, he despises asking Icy for help with anything.

- Yeah, of course he can – what do you MEAN you can’t communicate with your alters internally?? Do organics not come with a built in comm?? What the FRAG-

- He doesn’t like feeling out of sorts about finding someone with his condition. As far as he’d known, they were the only one ever to be split as they are. Someone who knows what it’s like, while desperately needed, is now almost unnerving.

- But he is an excellent vent buddy about multiple personality issues. If your alters want to chat shit about each other then Hothead is DOWN, he has a list of complaints about Icy and Random a mile long – even though airing them gets him interrupted by said alters all the damn time.

- Hothead will encourage violent coping mechanisms to your problems: if you have someone bothering you with some horror-movie assumptive bullshit about your disorder he is 1000% percent encouraging you to lure them behind a building for him to grind under his pedes.

Random:

- NEW FRIENDS?! New friends INSIDE of friends, oh he just wants to stuff you in his mouth and unravel you -

- Random is probably the first of the three to recognise your shared disorder. And when he gleefully tells his alters they don’t believe him (at least at first). Which doesn’t matter because you are now BEST FRIENDS. He’s gonna scoop you up and stuff you in his cockpit and make you a little hole in the mines riiiiiiight next to his berth. Don’t worry about telling him yes - he already knows your address!

- No matter how threatening you might think yourself to be, to Random you are the most adorable schmoopsie moo in the whole galaxy and he will commit war crimes to have you tucked into his pockets.

- Do not. Try him. In one-upmanship. Random knows exactly how far he will go to keep you with him and unlike Icy, who prefers to observe from a distance, Random will actively engage in finding very uncomfortable boundaries very quickly. Pretty much the only way to reign him in is to not play along in the slightest.

- He hates being ignored.

- He wants to hear and know everything about you, and will hop between subjects to a pattern only he knows. He’s exhausting, but probably also the most honest and vulnerable of the personalities.

- With Random, it’s most obvious that Blitzwing has total, universal acceptance of your personalities as they are. No dismissal, no belittling, no questions and no doubt.

- I’d say thats a breath of fresh air.

[alitteraladhdmess]

ROTTMNT AU!! Continue for More Information

Tethered to Us (TTUS)

A few weeks ago I watched the horror movie Us and I thought the concept of it was very interesting. “Shadow” versions of yourself controlling your every move. So because I love combining things I like I decided to try and put that movie into Rise. The concept isn’t exactly the same, I changed a lot as I work shopped it, and it’s still in the works but I like anyways.

When the turtles got mutated, and Draxum’s lab destroyed, a few positions and crystals got knocked over and thrown across the lab. One crystal in particular landed near the turtle tots. Consequently, both due to its magic and landing in the ooze, it fused with the turtles giving them a unique ability. Of course no one found out about this ability till later on in their little tot lives. This new ability allows the turtles to transform into these short of creatures. The transformation is heavily dependent upon emotion and almost impossible to fully control, unless the right practices are meditated, or one other reason I will get into in a bit. Shifting mostly happens when the host experiences anger, sadness, and sometimes joy at a very intense level. It almost acts as a shield in a way.

These leviathans, I’ll call them for lack of a better word, are giant shadow like creatures. Depending on the hosts height or how they feel, the leviathan can be as small as an ant or bigger than a 10 story building. Their markings also depend on the host and their feelings. When angry the markings will be sharp and exact. When sad they will droop or become dull. And when happy the markings will glow. When the host is about to transform their figure smokes, the smoke can be multi colored.

Splinter found out about this little aspect of the turtles after the twins got into a fight and Leo got a little too silly in his teasing. Later, Leo and Raph started transforming more often, but Mikey only ever smoked, never mad enough to actually shift. As the turtles continue to grow Donnie starts experimenting with the abilities of these unknown forms. His studies came back and proved that each leviathan has different abilities that correspond to the hosts ninpo, although they can’t use the ninpo in said form. Leo was able to reach incredible speeds 247 mph, could scale walls with ease, and could sense emotions with 80% accuracy. Like a lizard.

Mikey is fire resistant, or can stand temperatures of 2,000 at least. Splinter caught them and didn’t let them continue the experiment. Mikey is able to roll into an armored ball and is quite agile, which makes up for his small size. Very similar to armadillos. He also has the strongest bite of the four.

Raph, closely resembled a porcupine with his movable spines on his back. Although not as many. He is able to resize himself, the smallest he can get is about the size of the average house cat, and the biggest of about 10 football fields.

Donnie was by far the most graceful of all the turtles, and had very insect like features. His eyes could see 360 and all his other senses are heightened. Moth like wings allow him to fly and he was able to tech into organic matter (like the Alcarian in Voltron) but the effort is taxing on his energy. And unlike the other three, Donnie is able to speak in his leviathan form, albeit very choppy.

Donnie found that at the center of a leviathan there is a crystal shard protected by a shield of mystic energy. *no turtles were harmed in the finding of this information* Consequently, though, the leviathan goes into shut down once any material breaks the mystic shield, and the host can’t turn back for 24 hours.

With that being said, the second way to control a leviathan is to remove the crystal from its host. In most cases the crystal would become completely detached from its host and neither would be able to affect the other.

!!Small Spoiler!!

In the case of the turtles it is sewn to their soul and are effected by any damage to the crystal but not vice versa.

I will be expanding on this au and I hope to come out with character designs for each. If you guys could recommend other names for the leviathans that would be wonderful. And I may create a comic for it but no promises. Feel free to asks questions about TTUS, I will gladly answer them as long as they don’t contain eventual spoilers for any plot I wish to keep secret. Thank you for reading all of this!! I hope you stay for further posts:)

[insideliascrazyhead]

Yasushi´s and Tsukasa´s dirty little secret

Summary:What exactly is the reason for Yasushi and Tsuaksa to constantly fight?Why are they sneaking around?That´s what the Oya High delinquents get an answer to as they´re invided to Tsukasas place one day,revealing his interesting what he would call roomates and others relatives.

Pairings:Yasushi/Shidaken,Tsukasa/Fujio,Todoroki/Odajima

Warnings:none

Authors note:That´s just an idea my sister and I came up with on with they have such a distaste towards each other but still kinda care. Enjoy<3

The fight against Kidra is nearly a week in the past by now and Oya High´s delinquents are back to normal.At least nearly.It´s unnormally peaceful,because the Yasu-Kiyo faction is currently missing their leaders.Tsukasa said it´s probably Yasushi´s head that makes more trouble then normal.Shidaken was brutal and the fight with Kidra short later didn´t necessarily help the healing process either.He won´t wanna admit weakness or even mortality,Jamuo snorted earlier,so he keeps his distance until he feels up to kick ass again,but Fujio worries as usual.“He´s gonna be doin great,I mean it´s Yasushi.“Tsukasa rolls his eyes.„Also he got Kiyoshi,who is probably crazily overprotective right now anyways.Have you seen him during that fight with Housen?That man was deranged.“Nakaoka calls over towards where they´re seated.“Shouldn´t we at least check on him?Behave like a faction?C´mon!“Fujio pleads,looking expectingly at the other delinquents.Todoroki meanwhile puts his book aside and sighs.Murayama´s words still in his head.“Fine.You heard your leader.“He says and Fujio jumps up excited.“Field trip!“He exclaims as they all under different kinda reactions get up and leave.

Crazily they learn as soon as they reached the Burning District that none of them have any idea where Yasushi and Kiyoshi moved to exactly,after leaving Hope Hill.„C´mon guys!Really?None of yáll know anything whatsoever about Yasushi?Or Kiyoshi?“Fujio states with the typical I´m not angry,I´m dissapointed look.“We´re not exactly the heart to heart conversation kinda group.“ Tsukasa snorts.„He´s not wrong.They don´t speak about themselfes anyways.“Nakagoshi states.„You all know we´re just speaking about their address?Not that heart to heart kinda personal if you ask me.“Fujio scolds,crossing his arms.„Relax man.It´s not like you got the solution either.“ Shibaman defends.„We dumbasses could at least have thought about it earlier,before leaving Oya High.It´s raining like crazy and cold as fuck.“Tsuji points out.

Tsukasa rolls his eyes at their behavior.He knows Yasushi is probably at his boyfriends house which crazily isn´t Kiyoshi,even tho he has no idea who exactly it is either.Sure he doesn´t necessarily like Yasushi,but that information is personal and for him to share only.So he just shuts his mouth about that.Whatever they´re free to do something else now that they are in the burning district anyways and not gonna lie Tsukasa´s to lazy to go back to Oya as they missed the subway.So he offers to go to his apartment because no one will be there anyways,right?Wrong.The others agree with ease,all similar dismotivated because of the storm,so that´s how they land at Tsukasa´s.

When they all head into the living room Tsukasa sneaks a suspicious golden and black jacket as well as a red shirt with floral print behind the nearest furniture as they all get seated probably thinking he tries to sort some regular chaos out.They manage to entertain themselfes and crazily enough have a good time.Tsukasa relaxing the more time passes,thinking their loud chaos would´ve woken up whoever´s at home from a peaceful slumber anyways.That´s where the blonde was mistaken.He should´ve learned years ago that his siblings have no peaceful beauty sleep,no.They sleep like a dead body and a firework going off near their heads wouldn´t wake them.Until now.His younger sibling run down the hall spreading through the apartment to entertain themselfes.„Spreading like a damn disease.“Tsukasa thinks rolling his eyes.Though when the chaos sibling hear a commotion they run into the living room,screaming,hoping for they´re favorite older brother.In a heartbeat Oya is silenced by two little girls,that gotta be under ten and a toddler running in.Stopping dead in their tracks,seeing the newcomers,the oldest stumbling over the little girl that for whatever reason is wearing a princess costume, sending her to the floor.Silence is immidiatly replaced by chaos.The little girl takes a pink baseball bat that´s lying near the sofa and runs after her sister screaming like someone´s being killed.Tsukasa jumps up immidiatly to run after them snatching the weapon.He leans down pointing accusingly at the girl.“That bat´s not for killing your siblings Hikari!Where´d you get that anyways?You know what?Not important go take Neo and have a tea party or something.“He scrunches the bridge of his nose,totally done for today.The others meanwhile break out laughing.

“Man your sister looks like Yasushi!“Nakagoshi snorts as he points towards girl in the princess dress.„No you´re crazy and got to many hits to the head.“Tsukasa shakes his head.“Tsukasa´s an only child tho?“Jamuo raises an eyebrow turning towards him.„Oh?Yeah,they´re my step siblings. My parents seperated years ago,when I was little and my dad and I moved in with his what I learned later,affair.Kinda brings the mood down when I bring it up and it´s whatever.My dad´s working a lot,in a more distant location anyways and is home usually on the weekends.It´s chaos,loud,crazy but not necessarily that bad.“He shruggs hoping dearly for a distraction.

„Tsukasa?Your little sisters playing with electricity.“Todoroki tells him and his heart nearly stops.His head whips around to see little Yuzuha trying to electroduze a doll with starter cables.„Oi!Didn´t your brother tell you to stop electroduzing dolls?!“He screams as he runs over snatching that stuff away from the girl now too. “No.They gotta pay for their sins Tsukasa!Onii-chan encouraged it.He said it´s great that I got creative hobbies and that I shouldn´t listen to a fun sponge!“She pouts.„Where did she get a car battery anyways dude?!“Shibaman asks confused.„Fuck.No.We don´t own a car!“Tsukasa´s nearly histerical by now.“Living room!Out you go.Watch Saw or some similar messed up stuff.“She squeals in excitement and runs towards the Tv,turning on the movie.“Saw?How educational.“Todoroki rolls his eyes sarcastically.„Wanna have the kid electroduze dolls instead?“Nakaoka raises an eyebrow.

The entrance to the apartment get´s thrown open and a woman walks in,wearing clothes you´d wear for a party night out.For the second time that day Oya is silent.Weird what this household does to the delinquents.She heads towards the kitchen snatching some clothing off the drying rag and dissapears just to return two minutes later in a shirt and shorts that belong to Tsukasa´s dad.

She kicks the door to the fridge open,grabing an energy drink and lighting up a cigarette.The woman flinches in pain as she bends her bruised knuckles and sighs.She then takes out a package of frozen pea´s from the freezer cooling her bruised knuckles as Oya exchanges questioning looks.

That´s when they´re joined by anothter teenage delinquent because Yasushi casually comes out of a room down the hall,wearing joggers and a shirt,walking towards the kitchen grabbing an energy drink out of the fridge too.He opens it up and get´s seated on the counter not realizing that he´s got Oya High in the living room.It normally takes him a thousand years and at least two energy drinks to wake up and learn what´s goin on around him.Not even hearing Oya´s whispers as the Todoroki faciton notices him in a heartbeat,waiting how long it takes for the others to notice.Shibaman elbows Tsuji who chuckles.“All we need is popcorn that´s like we´re in a movie theatre.“He snorts.„For a weird ass film man.“Tsuji nodds.

„What food are you making that early in the morning?“Yasushi asks,trying some of the stuff in the tiny bowl with the consistency of pudding,“Kinda tastes weird,not gonna lie.“He grimaces as his mother takes the bowl.“Yeah,cause it´s a face mask.“She snorts and Yasushi dry heaves audibly in disgust taking the nearest dishtowel to clean the remains off his tongue.Taking a sip of his energy drink he get´s the remains down.

„That fight.“Yasushi says as he hints towards her bruised eye and bloody lip.“You won?“He raises an eyebrow taking another sip of his energy drink.“Fuck yeah!I kicked that bastards ass!“She announces and Yasushi laughs.“That´s what I wanna hear!“He exclaims proudly.“That´s sweet of you my little razorblade but there´s totally no way I would´ve lost against that bastard anyways.“She laughs.„My little razorblade what in the Adams family is goin on in this house?“Shibaman asks earning a shrug by Tsuji.„No therapist will belive me that shit.“Todoroki shakes his head,earing questionable looks too.That´s when Yasushi leans against the wall,his eyes land on Tsukasa who is seated on the sofa staring at him like he´s a ghost.The other Oya delinquents realize quickly Tsukasas frozen state and search for the reason.Nakaoka punches Nakagoshi in the shoulder and points towards Yasushi. “Woah!Yasushi?!“Fujio exclaims,jumping up in excitement,then eyeing his mother. “Yasushi!“Scream the two littlest,running towards their older brother excited,hearing the commontion.

„What are you doin in Tsukasa´s house?!Did you break in?“Jamuo squeaks histerically.„Bitch I fucking live here!“Yasushi yells angrily.„Weren´t you at your brain damadging boyfriends house?“Tsukasa rolls his eyes.��Untwist your panties,he´s sleeping in my room.“Yasushi poits towards his room.

„You two are related?!“Fujio asks shocked. „Kinda.“The two answer at the same time. „I got a thousand questions!“Tsuji exclaims excited. „Number 1,is your room a torture chamber?“Shibaman teases raising an eyebrow.„Or is your lamp is the head of your last victim?“Jamuo fears,moving closer towards Fujio and Tsukasa as the woman breaks out in laughter.„Whatever man.“Yasushi grumbles.

„Oi!You two.“He points towards Hikari and Neo.“Go and have your tea party in your room.“And in a heartbeat they do as they´re told.„You didn´t go to school?“He asks Yuzuha that plays with her pink baseball bat,toothfairy written on it.„Nope.You said I gotta hit the mean girl and I made her swallow a tooth!“She explains proudly and Yasushi snorts,composing himself as he sees Tsuaksa´s death glare.“No I didn´t.“He tries so desperatly not to laugh. “You totally did!You and Kenny came home from a fight and you stiched up his head when I told you about the mean girl that called me a lunatic and that I need to be in a looney bin!You got angry that you can´t kick a kid and said that when I see that advertisment for abortion again I gotta kick her ass and I don´t stop until a teacher pulls me off!“She explains eagerly.Nah fuck itYasushi thinks as he breaks out laughing so hard he bends over.„Yeah they´re so related.“Fujio snorts.“Those genes probably spread like a disease dude.“Nakaoka laughs.“So what did the teacher say?“ Tsukasa asks.“I´m a threat and menace to society just like Onii-chan!“She exclaims proudly.„So damn proud.“Yasushi says,placing a hand over his heart dramatically.“That´s why your loved Onii-chan is now in a school for delinquents and not the brightest crayon in the box,sweety.No more playing liquor store robbery with Yasushi.“The woman tells Yuzuha.

„I wouldn´t look at her like that,that´s not one of his sisters!“ Tsukasa whisper yells towards a frozen Fujio.„Then who?Woah!It´s his mother?!“He screams shocked.„Nah,she looks too young to be his mom man.“Nakagoshi shakes his head.„She´s 33 years old.“Tsukasa snorts.„That´s soo ancient!“Yasushi exclaims dramatically„Oi you puberty pensionier!Shut your cakehole!You´re nearly as old as me!“She hits him over the head and stops dead in her tracks as Yasushi flinches a lot more then normal,grimacing in pain.Yasushi learns quick about his mistake but not quick enough to move away as his mom shoves some of the hair,covering his head wound aside.

„What the fuck happened to your head?!“She raises an eyebrow at him.Yasushi rolls his eyes dramatically.Not answering her question.“Where´s Kiyoshi?“She asks instead.“At home.“He explains shortly.She walks towards the nearest wall,hitting against it with her fist.“Oi Kiyoshi!Get your ass here!Two minutes or I get a bucket of ice water.“She screams and it´s followed by a loud thud in what´s apparently Kiyoshi´s apartment.They break out in chuckles as they hear Kiyoshi curse and swear but eventually turn up.

“Two words.Yasushi´s head.Now speak.“She says leaning against the counter,crossing her arms and Yasushi would love to dissapear right there out of emberassment.„He got attacked by drugdealing crackheads with a leadpipe.“Kiyoshi rushes out under his breath.Yasushi hits him over the head,so Kiyoshi elbows him in the ribs.“What damadge?The usual?“She sighs heavily,massaging her temples and Yasushi nodds eagerly.“Yeah,the usual.Nothing special.“He answers with a innocent smile.„Kiyoshi?“His mother raises an eyebrow and Kiyoshi breaks.Weakling.“Nothing special my ass.Night in the hospital cause he was unconcious.Four stiches.Left early,got his ass kicked again.That dickhead opened the stiches.I brought him to the emergency room.He´s good now.“Kiyoshi explains earning a death glare from Yasushi,as he steps back,creating a bit more distance towards Yasushi who´s now angry at him for ratting him out.“I´m gone for two days and you get a lobotomy from some crackhead with a weapon?!You we´re in a sketchy alley on your own again.Weren´t you?You can be able to kick ass all you want and it won´t be any kinda use if you end up with a knife between your ribs or a brain bleed.You know that!Cause that´s what I´m trying to teach you to not get yourself killed.I hope whoever did that is dead now and you at least kicked their ass.“She rants angrily.

„Relax.We kicked their ass.“Shidaken´s voice comes from down the hall as their heads snap fast enough for whiplash.When his eyes land on Oya High he turns towards the room again.“Oh hell nah!“He exclaims making his way back.“Hey!Nope!Not gonna work,Sweetheart you´re joining this party.“Yasushi´s mother exclaims.“Housen´s Shidaken?“Todoroki smirks amused.“No?Clean your glasses.“Yasushi snaps as Todoroki takes out his phone texting Odajima,having won ten bucks.„Wasn´t he the one opening your head wound again in the first place?“Nakaoka asks and Shidaken steps behind Yasushi eyeing his mother,making Tsukasa and Fujio chuckle.„So what?We did kinda fu...“He looks at his sister looking at him innocently.“Fully on dated earlier.“He finishes.“Great save.“Kiyoshi chuckles.“Fuck yeah!“Yasushi exclaims happily.

„So he opened up the stiches on your head?“His mother raises an eyebrow.“That´s not that bad.“He shruggs.“Dickhead called me injured tho!“Yasushi grumbles offended.“Because you are!“Shidaken,Fujio and Kiyoshi exclaim at the same time.“You also told me exactly where to hit you.On your injury.“Shidaken chuckles and Yasushi rolls his eyes,trying not to smile.

„That dumbass behavior comes not from me.That´s gotta be your dad´s.That ain´t from me!“His mother defends trying not to laugh.“He can blame his own dick for that one oh yeah and you,cause I´m not able to concieve myself.“Yasushi snorts and his mother breaks out in laughter.„You can tell him that if you ever find his ass and hey you can tell him then that he ows me eighteen years of child support too,that cheap bastard.“She says and Yasushi rolls his eyes,long used to his mothers behavior.“So what?No shoveltalk for that one?“Kiyoshi asks grumpily pointing towards Shidaken.“Hell nah.Good luck,you will need it with that one.“She says simply.Yasushi just laughs throwing himself onto the couch,joined by Kiyoshi and after a threat to come and get him,by Shidaken too.„Maybe she´s not necessarily that bad.“Tsukasa sighs.„What?“Yasushi asks teasingly.„I´m not repeating myself.“Tsukasa grumbles.

[jinsbedroom]

word count: 9501

—

jinkook au where celebrity jungkook and his girlfriend goes to a roof top restaurant, nice and open for paparazzi to take pics of them. but when chef seokjin comes out to greet them, jungkook forgets all about the cameras and basically throws himself at seokjin.

—

the public have been on jungkook’s ass about his love life, which really isn’t any of their business. but at some point, the rumors were getting out of hand and he just wanted to buy himself some peace. so he asks his friend yoonji to pretend to be his girlfriend for a while.

they go on dates in very public or open spaces where they can be caught. when they get private rooms at restaurants, they make sure it’s one with a great view or a huge window so they can be spotted from outside. they hold hands and giggle with each other, talking about their crushes or upcoming events. they buy themselves expensive matching jewelry, which they think is really cute. to them, they’re just being best friends, but to the public, they seem in love.

it was easy. jungkook gets to hang out with his friend every week and no rumors will surface. he can hang out with all of his other friends too and the public won’t question him. it’s a win win. the people get what they want, and he gets to be seen in public with other humans.

… that is until they go to a famous roof top restaurant for a date. they do what they usually do: eat and chat while getting their photos taken from afar. and then the chef comes out to greet them in the middle of their meal.

“i’m seokjin, the chef and owner of this restaurant. thank you for dining here! i heard from the server that you really enjoyed the food. dessert’s on me! also, can i get an autograph? i’m a fan of your work, jungkook!”

jungkook really doesn’t know what to do with himself at that moment. he’s seen handsome men but none as handsome as the one standing in front of him now.

yoonji smiles. she knows exactly what’s going on in his head.

“jungkook would be happy to do that for you! wouldn’t he?” she kicks him hard from under the table to pull him out of his trance.

“y-yeah! sure!!” when seokjin walks away, yoonji laughs at him.

“did i just witness you falling in love at first sight or do you always have that dumb look on your face? ask him out or i will!”

“don’t tease me! i’ll ask him out… and you didn’t have to kick me that hard!”

for the rest of their time dining at the restaurant, jungkook aggressively flirts with seokjin when he comes by to check on them. jungkook has no idea how he got so bold (and cringey) but he couldn’t stop word vomiting every time seokjin came by.

“you look really good in those pants, bet you’d look good without them too.”

“the way i see it, you’re the only 10 here, everyone else is an 8.”

“has anyone ever told you that your lips are pretty? i’d kiss them if you let me.”

every time jungkook said something like that, seokjin’s ears would turn red, trying not to laugh, and then he’d glance over at jungkook’s girlfriend to see her hiding a smile behind her hand. he notices that once he leaves their table to check on other customers, jungkook would hide his face in his hands and groan, loudly. and yoonji would laugh at him. seokjin suspects that maybe… this is what they’re into? they want him as a third?

and seokjin thinks his suspicions about them are confirmed when jungkook blatantly asks him if he’s single and if he’s interested— which he is. he’s interested in jungkook at least, and hopes that doesn’t offend yoonji. he just doesn’t swing that way.

“is it okay if i kiss you? we just met, but i’m already excited to see you later.” jungkook asks as they’re leaving the restaurant.

“uh… yeah. i’d be okay with that.” seokjin smiles.

so jungkook pulls seokjin in by the waist and gives him a kiss on the cheek. seokjin makes eye contact with yoonji as this is happening and she just winks at him. then she hooks onto jungkook’s arm as they leave. maybe this isn’t a threesome situation? maybe they’re just in a very open relationship? seokjin is a little confused but he figures he can just talk to jungkook about it later whenever he calls to set up their date.

the next day, pictures of jungkook kissing seokjin in front of his girlfriend make headlines.

JUNGKOOK CHEATING ON YOONJI WITH FAMOUS CHEF SEOKJIN? FOOD IS THE WAY TO A MAN’S HEART, THEY SAY.

JUNGKOOK FLIRTS WITH CHEF SEOKJIN IN FRONT OF GIRLFRIEND ALL NIGHT, SAYS A RESTAURANT PATRON.

JUNGKOOK AND YOONJI SEEN LEAVING ARM IN ARM, HAPPY. WAS IT JUST A HARMLESS KISS?

“—another patron at the restaurant came forward and claimed that he was harassing the chef all night. the chef seemed uncomfortable with his advances and—” jungkook shuts off the tv.

“this is so fucked.” he sighs.

that morning, his manager had called him and told him stay away from social media and the news, but he couldn’t help himself. he had a texts from yoonji asking if he was okay and apologizing for not being careful, to which he responded that it wasn’t her fault.

he was the one who made moves on seokjin to begin with. yoonji was just there supporting him, as any best friend would. they made plans to go on another date in a few days, but the person jungkook really wants a date with is seokjin.

oh god, is seokjin okay? it completely slipped his mind while he was worrying about himself and yoonji that seokjin is also in this situation. he calls seokjin a few times, with no luck. so he grabs his things, a mask and a cap, and goes to the roof top restaurant.

—

seokjin isn’t the type of check the news everyday, but when yoongi, his best friend and business partner, texts him to tell him to stay home for the week… he gets curious. maybe it was a bad idea to let jungkook kiss him in public like that. he should have been careful. especially with a world famous celebrity like jungkook. especially when they were nothing to each other. they only just met yesterday. they only spoke for 15 minutes max.

seokjin lays in bed and wonders if jungkook had just been playing with him. after all, his girlfriend was right there too. maybe all that laughter and… jungkook’s embarrassed groans… maybe he read it all wrong? why would they want him as a third? why did he think that? would jungkook even want to go out with him if he didn’t want to go out with yoonji? he didn’t even know what their relationship is like. he literally knows nothing about them.

he thinks he’s ridiculous. did he really think jungkook actually wanted to date him? he lets out a laugh of disbelief.

and over a man who literally came to your restaurant with his girlfriend for a date, you let yourself think he wanted you? he thinks.

it’s been a really long time since he’s wanted to go on a date with anyone. he’s not anti-love or anything, but after a traumatizing relationship from years ago, he‘s just being more careful with his heart and more selective with the people he surrounds himself with.

he’s been a fan of jungkook’s work for quite some time, therefore, he knows about him to some degree. so when jungkook started (badly) flirting with him, he couldn’t help but think ‘what if’ and just like that he let himself hope for more.

a spontaneous and reckless move.

and he really only has himself to blame in this situation. he should have known when he didn’t get any texts or calls after jungkook left. he wanted to think that jungkook lost the paper that he wrote his number on, but…

“stop stop stop. no self pity in this household. you are a handsome, capable, wonderful human being, kim seokjin. don’t be disappointed in yourself for believing you’re wanted by someone else.” he says to himself, as tears start to form.

that’s the thing, isn’t it? he knows he could pull anyone— in fact, there’s probably a long line of people who want to take him out on a date. he’s an attractive man with a great personality, and a famous chef on top of all that. but it took years of healing for him to come to realize that about himself. it took years for him to pick himself back up and put himself back together after hitting rock bottom with his mental health.

he’s not going to let his insecurities about some guy he only talked to for 15 minutes make him feel bad about himself. not when he worked so hard to build up his confidence. so he wipes his eyes with the back of his hand before any tears fall and gets out of bed. since he can’t go to work all week, he decides he would come up with some new special menu recipes for his restaurant.

he goes to the kitchen and puts on his apron before opening the fridge to see what he has to work with. he likes to treat the creation of special menus as though he’s in a cooking competition show where he has a limited resources.

it isn’t something he has time to do anymore. he and yoongi used to do new special menus all the time, but when the restaurant became more popular, they couldn’t keep up. he decides it would be a good idea to call yoongi to ask what his main ingredient should be.

seokjin picks up his phone to call yoongi, but gets a call from yoongi instead.

“h-”

“hey hyung, jungkook came here to find you earlier, so i gave him your address. he should be at your house soon! sorry i didn’t ask first, but there’s a lot of reporters camping out here. i had to send him away quickly. i gotta go now, we’re really busy! lots of customers today, bye.”

not a single word. seokjin didn’t even get a “hey yoongi” out before the phone call ended.

before seokjin could process anything, the door bell rings. in his doorbell camera, he sees jungkook, pulling his mask down looking straight into the camera with huge eyes.

“h-hyung? can i call you that? can you let me in? is this even the right house?” jungkook whispers loudly into the mic. jungkook moves his face away from the camera and pulls out his phone to check his gps to make sure he’s at the right place.

seokjin can’t help but smile. jungkook is just so cute. this he’s always known. he opens the door to let jungkook in and is immediately pulled into a hug as soon as the door shuts.

“i’m so so sorry. i should have been more careful.” jungkook sounds like he’s about to cry.

“hey, it’s okay! no big deal. just a small little scandal that no one will care about in a few days.” seokjin says, getting a grip on jungkook’s shoulders to maybe push him off a little.

“no, i should’ve never put you in that situation. yoonji and i went there to literally get caught by paparazzi and we completely forgot we were being watched. i’m so sorry.” jungkook can feel seokjin’s hands on his shoulders, but he holds on tightly to seokjin.

he doesn’t think he’s ready to face seokjin just yet. aside from all the shit the media was saying about him, people were calling seokjin all sorts of names: home wrecker, slut, side piece, just to name a few. and it was all his fault.

“does yoonji know you’re here?” seokjin sounds nervous, like he’s afraid to ask, but has to. and it makes sense.

seokjin probably thinks jungkook and yoonji are dating.

oh. seokjin thinks jungkook and yoongi are dating…

with that realization, jungkook pushes off of seokjin, but still has his hands on his waist and looks straight at seokjin.

“we aren’t dating—i mean yes, she knows i’m here—but we aren’t dating, hyung. it’s all for show. it’s fake.”

“what?” seokjin is shocked. he’s seen so many pictures of them together on magazine covers and all over social media. it’s fake? what does that even mean?

“yoonji’s just a friend. i asked her to pretend to be my girlfriend and be seen with me a lot in public. i don’t know if you were aware but for a few years, i had dating scandals left and right with every single human i interacted with. it was unbearable! wait, if you thought i was in a relationship, then why did you agree to go out with me?”

“i… thought you wanted me to be in a throuple? i’m not against polyamory! but i’m also not interested in yoonji… so maybe you were in an open relationship…” seokjin tries his best to explain his thought process and jungkook couldn’t stop giggling.

“seokjin. i’m in love with you, by the way. is that too soon? i don’t know. i literally heard wedding bells the moment you stepped into my view.” jungkook word vomits.

oh my god jungkook shut up right now. you’re literally the worst. who the fuck tells that to someone they just met? jungkook chastises himself in his mind. jungkook body curls forward in embarrassment, forehead landing on seokjin’s chest.

a love confession already? seokjin has never met anyone as bold as jungkook. he felt his face heat up and he knew his ears must be tomato red by now. he lets out a weak laugh when jungkook’s head is on his chest, knowing that he’s feeling embarrassed like he was last night.

he’s known this man for less than an hour at this point. he clears his throat, taking jungkook’s hands from his waist, causing jungkook to look at him, clearly blushing.

“so are we going to just stand in the doorway or what?” seokjin says to lighten the atmosphere.

jungkook smiles, “ah, sorry we should go inside… you’re wearing an apron? were you going to cook?”

“yeah! i was going to come up with some new recipes for our special menu. how about you help me? i’d love to have a taste tester.”

—

after taste testing a few of seokjin’s new creations, they ate lunch together and talked for hours.

“i can’t believe you’re allergic to garlic! you’re a vampire aren’t you? isn’t that why you’re so pretty?”

they talked like this for hours. small things, big things. no matter what they talked about, jungkook couldn’t help but compliment seokjin every chance he gets.

“hyung, this is delicious! how hasn’t someone tried to pursue you by now. i can’t believe how lucky i am right now.” jungkook had said at some point.

it all felt so easy. jungkook really thinks he’s in love, but he tries not to say it aloud again. they’ve only been talking for a few hours. he doesn’t want to accidentally make seokjin think he’s not serious about wanting to date him. he didn’t want to scare seokjin away.

it all felt so fast—it was so fast… but seokjin let all his walls down so quickly and accepted jungkook. jungkook just had a way of making him feel comforted and comfortable. it felt safe enough to give jungkook a piece of his heart, even if jungkook didn’t know he had it. he shared the story of his insecurities of that morning when he saw the news, about how he let himself get in his own head.

and immediately, jungkook reassured him a thousand times over. “you’re the most beautiful person in the world, hyung, have you seen yourself?"

and now, after getting to know you in this short time, i’m more sure than ever that there’s nobody as great as you. i’m sorry about the news, but you’re amazing hyung. don’t read the articles.”

“don’t put me on a pedestal, jungkook. i’m only human. i can make mistakes too… but why didn’t you call me? or text me? i probably wouldn’t have thought all those things if i got a text or something!”

jungkook’s eyes go wide and he looks almost offended that seokjin was accusing him of such thing. “i did call you! i called you a few times this morning and you didn’t pick up so i went to the restaurant and your friend yoongi gave me your address, which is why i’m here!”

seokjin takes out his phone to show jungkook that he has no missed calls. “see? no missed calls from you. did you call the right number?”

jungkook takes out his phone to show seokjin that he did, in fact, call a few times. seokjin laughs, “the last number is a 1, not a 7! i dont know who you called, but it wasn’t me!”

“what?” jungkook quickly grabs his wallet from his back pocket and pulls out the piece of paper seokjin had written his number on yesterday. “hyung, how is that a 1, it looks like a 7.”

“nope that’s a 1. that’s clearly a 1.”

“no, that’s a 7, who writes their 1s like that?”

“me! i do!”

“well you have very nice handwriting… except for the 1 that’s begging to be a 7!”

they laugh about it for a while, saving each other’s actual numbers on their phones.

before they knew it, it was almost dinner time. how did time go by so fast? jungkook wants to stay longer, to have dinner with seokjin, but he promised he’d meet up with yoonji to talk about their next date and what they’d do now that jungkook has someone he really wants to date.

seokjin walks jungkook to the door and they stand there for a little while, just smiling and looking at each other.

“i wish i didn’t have to leave.” jungkook says with a hint of regret in his voice. he wish he had a clear schedule today.

“well you can always stay next time, okay? anytime you want.” seokjin smiles, reaching out to jungkook’s face, tucking away some stray strands of his hair behind his ear.

jungkook takes seokjin’s hand and presses it to his cheek. “is it okay if i kiss you hyung?”

“yeah, that’s more than okay.”

so jungkook moves seokjin’s hands from his cheek to his lips and kisses the palm of his hand. seokjin presses his lips together when jungkook doesn’t kiss him there like he expects. it makes him blush. it feels so intimate.

“you don’t have to ask me whenever you want to kiss me, you know. you could just… kiss me. anywhere, anytime.” seokjin chuckles.

jungkook smiles. seokjin really shouldn’t give him so much power. “i like hearing confirmation from you though. it feels good to hear you want me to kiss you, that you’re okay with it. but i’ll keep that in mind for next time.” jungkook slips on his shoes and leaves the house.

they spent a little over 8 hours together. they pretty much did nothing all day aside from eat and talk. before seokjin can feel the loss of jungkook’s presence, his phone rings. it’s jungkook.

“hey jungkookie, did you forget something?”

“aha… no hyung, i just wanted to talk to you a little bit more while i’m driving. is that okay? i miss you. sorry, am i too clingy? we don’t have to!”

“it’s fine! i was just about to miss you too but you didn’t give me enough time.”

they laugh. they talk about this and that for 20 minutes while jungkook is driving. it’s nice. seokjin thinks he could get used to this, talking for hours and feeling so wanted. he’s a little scared to fall, but he lets himself.

that night, he calls yoongi and tells him all about his day. all about jungkook. and yoongi is happy for him, obviously. it’s been a while since yoongi has seen seokjin so happy to have a love interest. yoongi is a realist though and he never wants to see seokjin hurt again. he tells seokjin to be careful anyway.

“don’t expect so much. just go with the flow, okay? you only just met.”

“i know yoongi… it’s just nice now that you’re not the only person i have to talk to!” seokjin jokes.

“and you will still always have me.” yoongi reminds him.

“ah yoongichi, don’t worry too much okay? i tell you everything, all the time! and i’m a grown man, i can handle it.”

“why are you calling me yoongichi all of a sudden?”

“because you’re cute, my yoongichi! okay i’ll hang up now. i’m going to sleep. don’t stay up too late!”

after hanging up, he sends a goodnight text to jungkook and puts his phone down immediately, not waiting for a reply. for the first time in his life, he doesn’t feel anxious about his feelings not being reciprocated. jungkook was so obvious about how he felt.

that night, seokjin had the best sleep he’s had in years. no dreams. no nightmares. just peaceful, uneventful sleep.

—

the moment jungkook gets to yoonji's house for dinner, he can't wait to leave. it's not that he doesn't want to hang out with her, he just wants to marinate in his feelings and thoughts about seokjin. jungkook tells yoonji about his day with seokjin and then completely spaces out once yoonji starts talking about how they should stage and announce their breakup.

head empty. just seokjin on his mind.

"you have it bad." yoonji laughs.

"what?" jungkook blinks, looking up to make eye contact with her.

"i said you have it bad. jeez, i didn't know someone could fall that hard for another person."

"yeah, i didn't know either. i mean, at first i just thought he was super handsome, like i've never seen anyone more beautiful than him in my life. i literally looked at him and thought 'he's the one' even though i knew nothing about him." jungkook explains.

"yeah, you made that dumb face and everything… and now?" yoonji presses for more information.

"and now i find out that he's a real human being with complex thoughts and feelings? now that i've heard his laughter and the facial expressions he makes? i just want to learn more. earlier when he was cooking, he made the cutest face of confusion when his soup didn't taste the way he expected it to. when he made these wraps and fed them to me, his face lit up when i told him they were delicious."

once jungkook starts talking about him, he can't stop. yoonji was hanging onto every single word he said, smiling and nodding at him. he's so grateful to have a friend who is so excited for him because he knows anyone else would be against him falling for someone this quickly.

"and whenever i compliment him, he gets all shy and red, but then he'll agree with so much confidence in his voice. like 'of course it's delicious, i'm famous chef kim seokjin, after all!' when he talks about his personal life, he pauses often to make sure he gets his words right. he doesn't have a single bad thing to say about anyone in his life and… he sees so much good in the people around him. it's so clear that he loves them. i want to be one of those people. and now i feel like i'm in too deep and i have this really intense infatuation with him and i'm probably already in love with this guy and i have no idea how he feels about me because he didn't say. he called me cute a bunch… and he… let me kiss him twice now…"

jungkook lets out a long sigh, folding over to lay his head on the table. he grabs one of yoonji's hands from across the table and holds it just to ground himself. he thinks if he continues to talk, he might start to overthink and doubt himself.

"and he let you stay at his house for like 8 hours and he talked to you the entire time. and then talked to you on the phone /after/ all that too." yoonji reminds him. "he likes you. and if you doubt that, then at the very least, he enjoys your company."

"you're right. i know you're right. i'll just ask him next time." jungkook releases yoonji's hand and lifts his head to see her writing something on a notepad.

"what are you writing?"

"a list of things you like about him." yoonji grins.

"okay… why?"

"so that when i'm planning your wedding, like next week, i can help you write your vows." she teases him, laughing. jungkook kicks her lightly from under the table.

"we have to break up first though." jungkook reminds her.

"oh, you're ready to stop thinking about seokjin for a minute so we can work that out? great!"

"stop teasing me, i didn't come here to be bullied!" he laughs.

they decide on the narrative that they broke up after deciding they were better off as friends a month ago, so they still went out a lot together, but only as friends. they call jungkook's manager to confirm everything. their statements would be posted in the morning.

jungkook leaves yoonji's house feeling like he has to hold his breath because he has no idea how the public will react. he has no idea what the headlines will be. he drives around for a little bit with the windows down to clear his mind before heading home.

when he finally gets home, he gets a goodnight text from seokjin, which brings a smile to his face.

he texts seokjin back with:

goodnight yoonji and i are announcing our breakup tmrw ): can i come over? i guess you're asleep already text me in the morning <3

jungkook showers and gets in bed right after texting seokjin. the alternating feelings of his anxiousness about the aftermath of the announcement and his excitement for seeing seokjin again keeps him for an extra couple hours before he can finally fall asleep.

—

jungkook wakes up to, no exaggeration, hundreds of notifications. he overslept and woke up an hour after the time of their statement release. instead of stressing out, he immediately goes to check seokjin’s text messages and replies to him first.

seokjin (loml):

2 hrs ago

good morning. ^-^ i’m home all week so you can come over any time this week.

1 hr ago

i’m going for a morning grocery run. if you come by just let yourself in. door code is 090393. <3

10 mins ago

wake up! i’m making breakfast. c:

me:

2 mins ago

just woke up i’ll be over asap, don’t eat without me

seokjin (loml):

7 secs ago

okay! *:

jungkook rushes to get ready and is out the door in 10 minutes. it takes him another 15 to get to seokjin’s house. when he gets there, he punches in the door code and is greeted by the scent of food.

“jungkook-ah! you’re here!” he can hear seokjin say from the kitchen.

jungkook finds himself frozen in the doorway. he was hit with a wave of comfort. then he feels tears rushing down his cheeks. all the stress and anxiety from the hundreds of notifications this morning caught up to him when he made it to a safe place—seokjin’s home.

“jungkook?” he hears seokjin call out again. then he hears seokjin putting a pot or a pan into the sink, the faucet running, probably from seokjin washing his hands, and then footsteps as he walks towards the doorway.

“oh my god, baby, why are you crying?” seokjin rushes over to wipe jungkook’s tears with his thumbs, which only makes jungkook cry harder. he feels safe enough to let it all out.

“h-hyung…” jungkook manages through his tears.

“shhh it’s okay. come on, take off your shoes, let’s go inside.”

seokjin sits down on the couch and pulls jungkook into his lap and holds him. he continues to thumb away jungkook’s tears as they fall, rubs his back, and kisses his face. it was all so comforting. they’re pretty much the same height, but jungkook feels so small in this moment, being held by seokjin, sitting in his lap.

“it’s okay baby. you’re okay. who made my pretty baby cry, hm?” he could hear seokjin say between face kisses.

some might think that he’d have thicker skin after being a celebrity for so long, but things still get to him. there’s a lot of things he can ignore, but on days where he gets hundreds of notifications, he gets overwhelmed. it’s a wonder how his phone hasn’t exploded yet.

he wishes the world would stay out of his personal life and focus on his work. it makes him wonder if all the work he’s done was for nothing. what’s the point of coming up with amazing content if all people care about is who he’s dating and what he’s doing in his free time? which he knows isn’t true. he knows he has lots of adoring fans who love him for the content he’s put out, the movies he’s directed and/or starred in, the music he makes. he wishes he could block it all out and only focus on that.

it takes him around 20 minutes to calm down, an all time record for him. usually when he’s stressed, he’ll cry for at least an hour. after he calms down, he chooses to remain in seokjin’s lap, head resting on seokjin’s shoulders.

seokjin’s fingers comb through the hair on the nape of his neck.

“hyung?” jungkook finally says.

seokjin hums in response.

“do you like me?”

“of course i do. i more than like you. you’re so easy to love, jungkook. is that what this is about?” seokjin replies softly.

“so you love me?”

seokjin doesn’t say anything. he just chuckles in response. jungkook can feel the vibrations coming from seokjin’s chest and neck as he chuckles.

“hyung?”

“hm?”

“i liked it when you called me your baby. i like being yours.”

“you have no idea what it’s like to be mine.”

“can i find out?” jungkook says as he lifts his head to face seokjin. “i want to be yours. i want you to be mine. i know it’s only been… 2… 3 days now. but why waste time when i already know how i feel?”

“what are you saying right now?” seokjin says, brushing jungkook’s hair out of his face.

“i’m saying… do you believe in love at first sight, hyung? that’s how i feel about you. i feel so in love with you already. i’m not love bombing you. i have real serious feelings for you. i’m saying you called me ‘baby’ and i want to keep hearing it from you. i’m saying you let me cry in your lap and didn’t complain… you comforted me. you made—make me feel safe. i’m saying you kissed me, all over my face, and i want more, if you’ll give it to me. i’m saying be my boyfriend, seokjin. please be with me?”

“i’ve really never met anyone as bold as you, jeon jungkook.” seokjin lets out a weak laugh, blushing.

“can i kiss you?”

“yes, anytime you want. i’m yours.” seokjin smiles.

so jungkook grabs seokjin by the face and kisses his forehead, then his nose, then his lips. they stare into each other’s eyes for a moment, hearts beating loudly and in sync, a little out of breath from their emotions.

seokjin bites his lips and breaks their comfortable silence. “come on, our food is probably cold by now, i’ll go heat it up.”

before jungkook can move off of seokjin, he’s pulled into another kiss, causing him to giggle. “you’re so cute, baby.”

then seokjin stands up, still holding onto jungkook, effectively carrying him. jungkook quickly wraps his legs around his waist like a koala and is carried to a dining table chair. when seokjin lets him down, he adds a kiss to the top jungkook’s head and goes to the kitchen.

jungkook can safely say that he has never felt more loved and cared for by another person than he feels it with seokjin in the past few days he’s known him. while he waits, he scrolls through his phone notifications. he figures this is as good a time as any to check them.

all this friends sent him messages to check in on him, his manager texted him to stay off of social media, lay low, don’t even leave the house (oops, jungkook thinks), and yoonji sent him 17 cat videos along with a text that read:

watch these, not the news!

he decides those are the only notifications worth checking for now and leaves the rest for later.

“everything okay?” seokjin asks, as he sets down their food on the table and takes a seat across from jungkook.

“yeah,” jungkook smiles, “never better, actually.”

—

“thanks for letting me stay hyung!” jungkook happily says.

after breakfast, they checked the news and then played games, talked, cooked lunch, pretended they were in an episode of master chef… the day went by quickly and it was fun.

jungkook got a call from his manager saying that there were reporters camping outside his neighborhood, waiting for him to come out. except he wasn’t home. so with a sigh of relief, his manager said they would look into safer housing and told him to stay where he was. and if he couldn’t stay, then he should find a friend to crash with for the next few days. so obviously jungkook looks to seokjin and asks him. and obviously seokjin lets him.

jungkook lays on seokjin’s lap, loving the feeling of seokjin’s hands running through his hair, as they’re on the couch watching tv before dinner. seokjin is a lot more physically affectionate than jungkook had initially thought.

yesterday, despite all the flirting and talking for 8 hours, seokjin barely touched him. the most he did was feed him with his own two hands, but jungkook thinks that might be because he’s a chef. he did let jungkook kiss him though, so it’s not like he’s uncomfortable with it.

seokjin was right, jungkook had no idea what it’s like to be his. now that he’s getting an idea, he loves it. seokjin was always touching jungkook, whether it was just brushing shoulders, keeping a hand on jungkook’s thigh while sitting, massaging his neck, or holding hands. he also kisses jungkook a lot. just little casual kisses, kisses to fill pauses in their conversation, victory kisses when he wins a game… jungkook loves it. he’s been kissed so many times today and yet he still wants more.

it feels like they’ve been together for longer than just a few hours. jungkook walks around the house comfortably, as if he’s lived there with seokjin for years. it’s odd. it’s nice.

it’s probably because people usually spend short amounts of time together and slowly get to know each other throughout weeks or months, but they have been in each other presence for this huge block of time and they talked with each other for almost all of it. it also helps that jungkook was immediately taken by seokjin the moment he laid eyes on him. and it helps that seokjin thinks jungkook is so easy to love.

it was easy.

it was fast.

and it’s theirs. their relationship. their affection. their happiness. their comfort.

jungkook is dozing off on seokjin’s lap, almost fully asleep, when he heard the beeping of someone putting in the door code and opening the door. then he hears some foot steps walking towards him and seokjin.

“is he…?” he hears someone speak softly, in a low voice.

“jungkook? baby? can i get up?” he hears seokjin whisper into his ears. he sits up, blinking away his sleepiness. the couch shifts as seokjin gets up. seokjin leaves a kiss on his head before he goes.

when jungkook fully wakes up, he looks up to see yoongi setting up the table. he walks over to offer his help.

“hey jungkook, i brought some dinner. hyung’s in the bathroom.” yoongi says.

jungkook nods. he feels a little awkward since he doesn’t really know him. he only met yoongi for like a minute yesterday when he went to the restaurant, but yoongi’s speaking to him so casually.

“wait, how did you know i was here?” jungkook questions.

“nothing gets past me when it comes to seokjin,” yoongi makes eye contact with jungkook, “nothing.”

is he… threatening me? that sounded like a threat. jungkook thinks to himself, panicked.

yoongi chuckles, seeing the panic in jungkook’s eyes. “he texted me earlier, said you were staying over for a few days. don’t look so worried, i mean i wouldn’t be worried if i haven’t done anything wrong.” yoongi smirks.

“but if you do,” he continues, “i’ll be the first to know.”

“right… got it.” jungkook says.

realistically, jungkook knows that yoongi can’t actually do anything to hurt him. he doesn’t know his number or where he lives… and what is he going to do to a celebrity like jungkook? but admittedly, jungkook is terrified of yoongi at this point. this man is running a whole restaurant by himself to cover for seokjin because of a scandal that /he/ caused. what does yoongi think of him? does yoongi even approve of him dating seokjin?

he’s realizing really quickly that this is the same man seokjin has told him about for hours. in fact, he’s one of the only people that seokjin tells lots of stories about. the best friend. the business partner. the eternal roommate. the platonic soulmate.

this is the man seokjin says is adorable and kitten-like. which makes him question seokjin. how is he so powerful that he tamed a man like yoongi to be his best friend. how did he not die in the process? yoongi has the aura of a final boss in a video game.

jungkook has to win him over if he plans on being with seokjin for a long time. this is the man who’s birthday is seokjin’s door code, for crying out loud. he inhales. then exhales. and he’s about to attempt to talk to yoongi again when seokjin comes out of the bathroom.

“jungkook, you’re alive! why do you look like that? did yoongichi say something to you?” seokjin says, smiling.

“stop calling me that.” yoongi replies loudly, sounding a bit whiny and annoyed, but he’s smiling and looks a little flustered.

“never, my yoongichi is so cute and deserves the cutest nickname. don’t you agree jungkookie?” seokjin’s voice sounds a bit higher pitched now, clearly teasing yoongi.

jungkook can only reply with giggles.

he finds it amusing that just a second ago, yoongi seemed so scary to him, but in the presence of seokjin, he became so… cute. louder, whinier. a whole different person. his whole aura has changed.

the power seokjin holds and he doesn’t even know it. jungkook thinks.

during dinner, jungkook observes a few things about the pair.

1. they really love each other. like they clearly do. and jungkook would be jealous if he didn’t know anything about yoongi and their friendship, but he does because seokjin talked about him so much.

2. yoongi brings out seokjin’s cuteness. not that seokjin isn’t naturally always cute already, but in the name of annoying and teasing yoongi, seokjin will purposefully act cute. yoongi will cringe 100% of the time, but he (not so) secretly likes it.

3. seokjin brings out yoongi’s inner child. when jungkook interacts with yoongi, he’s more quiet, speaks a bit more matter-of-fact. but with seokjin, he’s loud, whiny, playful. he jokes around with seokjin. jungkook can only hope that he can get to that level with yoongi.

4. even when yoongi verbally denies seokjin of something, he does it anyway. like when seokjin tried to feed him, yoongi told him to stop, but opened his mouth to receive the food anyway. seokjin can pretty much get away with anything when it comes to yoongi.

jungkook wants to know what yoongi thinks of him. he just doesn’t know when a good time to ask is. as they’re having dinner, he notices that yoongi starts to joke around with him a little bit too, which makes him feel better.

when yoongi leaves, jungkook feels a bit of relief. he finally has some time to collect his thoughts and maybe plan what he might say to yoongi next time.

jungkook is honestly ready to turn in for the night. they just had dinner, but he’s emotionally exhausted from earlier today and he just wants to rest. but before he can do that, he has to get ready for bed. he didn’t have any of his things with him though, since he didn’t intend on sleeping at seokjin’s. so seokjin leaves him alone in the house while he goes to the store to buy some basics.

jungkook explores the house in areas he hasn’t explored. they’re mostly spent all their time together in the kitchen, dining room, and living room. the house is so big and there’s a lot of it he hasn’t seen.

he likes how spacious it is in the house, but it feels cozy due to how seokjin decorated it. it has a modern feel, but with cute colors and plushies thrown into the mix.

for example, seokjin’s kitchen is huge, modern, and sleek, but all the cabinets are pastel pink. he has kitchen towels with cute characters on them. it helps his very modern house feel less cold, more cozy, but still spacious. there seems to be 3 spare rooms on this floor, one of which belongs to yoongi, since he crashes here all the time. there’s an upstairs area that jungkook is too nervous to explore without seokjin. he knows the upstairs area is mostly seokjin’s, like his office and bedroom.

he wonders if seokjin will let him sleep with him in his room tonight or if he’ll get given his own room. on one hand, it would be nice to sleep with seokjin and wake up to him. they could cuddle all night and he thinks that would be a huge comfort for him. on the other hand, he doesn’t know if his heart can take it. falling asleep on seokjin’s lap on the couch is one thing, but sleeping together on the same bed? jungkook has never slept in anyone else’s bed with them before.

he’s never really dated anyone seriously like this before. jungkook is a hopeless romantic. he always believed that he would meet /the one/ and fall in love with them instantly like in all the romance movies and novels. and he did. at least that’s how he feels about seokjin. no one ever felt just right for him, so he never got into any relationships. on top of that, he’s a celebrity who’s constantly in the public eye. he wouldn’t put anyone through the whole process of dating him if he wasn’t serious about them.

after some time, seokjin finally comes back.

“I’m home! i just picked up a toothbrush and some underwear and socks for you. you can wear my clothes, is that okay?”

“that’s okay with me.” jungkook confirms. “so… where am i sleeping?”

seokjin looks a little shocked, and then laughs a little, rubbing the nape of his neck. “oh, sorry… i don’t know why i assumed you would just be sleeping with me in my bed. do you want your own room? you can take any of the downstairs ones if you want.”

“no! i want to… with you… in your room… sleep… please?” jungkook can’t even form a full sentence because he’s never asked to sleep with anyone before. it’s new and he feels shy about it. his request makes seokjin grin, pulling him closer to give him a kiss on the cheek.

“you can sleep wherever you want, okay? don’t feel pressured. but my room is open to you, if you want.”

“i do want.” jungkook replies, a little too quickly.

“okay then. come on, i’ll show you how the shower works.”

seokjin holds one of jungkook’s hands and they head up the stairs. for the first time since jungkook has known seokjin, he feels extremely nervous. a nervousness caused by being near seokjin.

this is all new for him. this is something he’s never felt before. this is something he never anticipated he would feel. but it’s a good nervous and he can’t wait to overcome it.

—

as tired as he is, jungkook can’t seem to fall asleep. he lays in seokjin’s bed by himself while seokjin is showering. he closes his eyes, only to open them again a few minutes later. he tosses and turns, not because the bed is uncomfortable, but because he’s so nervous.

jungkook doesn’t even know if seokjin will be joining him right after his shower, because it was still early in the night, only 9 pm. he wishes his tiredness and emotional exhaustion would take over his feelings of nervousness, but they don’t.

when seokjin comes out of the bathroom, he shuts his eyes, pretending to sleep. he doesn’t know why he does it. what’s the point? a few moments pass, he hears seokjin walk over to his side of the bed. he feels the lightest touch on his hair, causing him to open his eyes.

“sorry baby, did i wake you?” seokjin questions in a low, quiet voice.

“no, i couldn’t sleep anyway.”

“are you uncomfortable? is it the bed? your pajamas? i could get you different ones.” seokjin offers, taking a seat on the bed, running his fingers through jungkook’s hair.

“no, everything’s great. very comfy. i’m just a little nervous. i’ve never- this is- it’s just-” jungkook just can’t find the words. he doesn’t think seokjin will judge him, but he just can’t get himself to admit it out loud.

“like i said earlier, you don’t have to-”

“i want to.” jungkook cuts in.

“and that’s okay too, if you need something, just let me know okay? i’ll be in my office for a bit to do some work, right next door. i’ll join you when i’m done.”

seokjin leans down to plant a kiss on jungkook’s lips. jungkook tries to chase seokjin’s lips with his own, but seokjin only offered a short peck, before he’s up and out of the room.

jungkook immediately feels the absence of seokjin. earlier, he could at least hear him showering, but now it was too quiet. he should be used to it since he lives alone, but he can’t help but feel lonely. he already misses seokjin and they’re in the same house.

it only takes a couple minutes before jungkook gets out of bed to go to seokjin’s office room. the door was wide open, so he quietly let himself in. seokjin doesn’t seem to notice, so he takes a seat in an armchair, just watching seokjin focus on his work. jungkook dozes off in the armchair, feeling less nervous than he did in bed.

about 45 minutes later, he’s wakes up to the sound of seokjin screaming in surprise.

“AISH JUNGKOOK! oh my god i thought i saw a ghost. how long have you been in here? at least make some noise if you’re going to be in the same room as me at night. are you trying to scare the life out of me? i thought i was alone!” seokjin’s words fly out so fast and aggressively.

it’s the first time jungkook has seen this type of reaction from seokjin. sometimes he’ll scream from surprise, but quickly recover with laughter. this was new.

it makes jungkook laugh. “i’m so sorry hyung, i didn’t want to disturb you.” he says through his laughter.

“YAH! there’s nothing funny about scaring the life out of me okay? i nearly had a heart attack. i could have died!” seokjin says, hand over his chest. then he starts to laugh too. seokjin stomps over to jungkook and starts to tickle him.

“you think you’re so cute huh? you think i’ll forgive you for scaring me like this?”

“i’m sorry! i’m sorry! hyung please!” jungkook laughs harder than he did before.

seokjin stops, standing up straight, hands on his hips. he was laughing, but immediately makes a serious face.

“that’ll teach you not to laugh at me while i’m suffering! who knew i was dating a brat.”

jungkook recovers from laughing, just enough to reply. “and this will teach you that i’ll always give you what you give me in return!”

jungkook stands up and immediately goes to tickle seokjin back. seokjin starts running out the door and into the bedroom, escaping to his bed.

jungkook chases right after him, climbing onto the bed, on top of seokjin, to tickle him more. they’re playing with each other like kids, having fun, not caring how loudly they laugh. it’s not something jungkook thought he could have in a relationship as a full grown adult.

after a few minutes of this, seokjin pulls jungkook into a hug, stopping jungkook from tickling him. jungkook lays on top of seokjin like this for a few minutes, catching his breath. then seokjin shifts his body to sit upright and jungkook shifts to sit facing him in his lap. they smile looking at each other, bodies close, still breathless from all the laughter.

“i really think i love you.”

“you really think so?”

“yeah, hyung. i do. do you think you love me?”

seokjin just smiles at him. not answering, for the second time today.

“you said i’m easy to love.”

“you are.”

��i can work with that. this is just day one. we have plenty of days ahead of us.”

“we do, i look forward to them all.”

jungkook leans in close enough to feel seokjin’s breath. “can i, please?”

“always.”

that night, they kiss, tongues dancing on each other, moaning each other’s names. painting a beautiful memory to save in the archive of their love.

needless to say, jungkook overcomes his nervousness that night, having the best sleep of his life next to the man he loves, who loves him back. this is their day one out of infinity.

—

4 months later, jungkook finally moved in with seokjin. to be honest, he never really left since that first week he stayed over. he was at seokjin’s more than his own house.

they still haven’t officially announced their relationship to the public, but they’re not exactly hiding it either. they’re just enjoying their time together, whether or not they’re caught by cameras.

since jungkook and yoonji’s “breakup” announcement, people have been less invested in his love life. they still went out and would have their pictures taken by paparazzi, but since they weren’t dating and made it clear that they were only friends, people lost interest.

what this meant was that jungkook could hang out with seokjin and people would just assume that they were also just friends. no crazy headlines. no mess. no drama. they held hands, shared food and drinks, sometimes even kissed on the cheek in public. even with these displays of affection, no one jumped the gun to assume he was in a relationship with seokjin just because he held hands with him. it was so freeing for him.

seokjin’s restaurant had a huge spike in customers and popularity after he became very publicly “friends” with jungkook. jungkook’s fans often came by to get a glimpse of the man jungkook kissed in public months ago that caused headlines.

many modeling and entertainment agencies reached out to seokjin due to his good looks, but seokjin remained faithful to his love of cooking and running a restaurant with yoongi. they hired more help in the kitchen to keep up with the demand.

their rooftop restaurant was quickly becoming a reservation only place due to the high demand. with the help of more chefs, seokjin and yoongi actually started to make cooking videos together online, teaching others how to cook their recipes. they figured that not everyone could come to their restaurant, so they should share all their secrets. they knew there was a slight risk, but they also knew that most people at home were too lazy to make it anyway. and they would still always have customers at their restaurant.

tonight is jungkook’s movie premiere. it’s a movie he had filmed over half a year ago and it’s finally being released. he thinks there’s no better time to announce their relationship. and maybe even something more.

seokjin and yoongi leave the restaurant in the hands of their employees for the day to attend jungkook’s premiere with him. of course, yoonji would be there too. the four of them became quite close over these past few months.

jungkook may be the star of the movie, but seokjin seems to be the star on the red carpet. the people and the cameras love him. this is where jungkook seizes the opportunity.

yoonji and yoongi stand off to the side while reporters are picked to ask jungkook questions. jungkook has seokjin by the arm so seokjin couldn’t move to the side along with his friends. instead, he stands in the spotlight with his boyfriend as questions are being asked.

“what are you wearing tonight jungkook?” a reporter asks.

“ah, this is a one of a kind suit a famous foreign designer made for me! i had it made as soon as we wrapped up filming for this movie. this is a special film and definitely deserves a special suit!”

seokjin stands beside his boyfriend, amazed by how charming he is in front of all these cameras. it’s no wonder he’s so famous and adored by many. he’s one of jungkook’s fans too, after all.

“and chef seokjin? what are you wearing tonight?”

“oh me? i have no idea! jungkook gave me this suit and told me to wear and and come to the premiere with him. so here i am!” he smiles, looking over at jungkook.

“my boyfriend is wearing a suit by the same designer. they match each other, just different colors, as you can see! i had it made for him recently.” jungkook says, smiling wide, as he holds seokjin’s hands and takes a step back for the cameras to see their matching suits.

immediately, the sound of camera shutters and flashing lights becomes more intense. reporters start to yell out their questions, not waiting for their turn.

jungkook laughs, “i actually will not be taking anymore questions, but…” he looks over at seokjin, who’s looking over at him nervously, shocked that jungkook just announced their relationship like that, so casually. “will you take one more question seokjin?”

“uh, yeah… sure?” seokjin looks over to the reporters to see everyone’s hands up. then he looks back at jungkook to see that jungkook also has his hand up to ask a question.

“jungkook?” jungkook gives seokjin a huge smile, and gets on one knee, pulling out a ring.

in this moment, seokjin couldn’t see or hear anyone else.

“i was wondering if you’d wear this too?”

“what are you saying right now?” seokjin says as he also gets on his knees to be on the same level as jungkook.

“i’m saying i fell in love with you at first sight and that feeling never went away and will never go away. i’m saying i still hear wedding bells and i want that to be our reality and not just something in my head. i’m saying i want to spend the rest of my life with you. i’m saying… why waste anymore time when i already know how i feel? i love you. be mine. be my husband. please?”

seokjin stares at jungkook, tears threatening to leave his eyes.

“jeon jungkook, i’ve never met anyone as bold as you.” he says, smiling.

“is that a yes?”

“of course it’s a yes! i love you, jungkook.”

immediately jungkook starts to cry. “that’s the first time you’ve ever told me you love me!”

“what? there’s no way. i love you so much. how could i not have said it at least one other time?”

“you show me you love me in so many ways but this is the first time you’ve said it!”

“sorry it took so long…”

“it’s okay hyung, i love you.” jungkook slips the ring onto seokjin’s finger. “can i kiss you hyung?”

instead of answering, seokjin leans in to kiss jungkook. in front of all the lights and cameras on the red carpet of jungkook’s movie premiere.

[madamepestilence]

Content warnings: Violence, slur reclamation, heavy profanity

We're actually doing this. Holy shit; we might actually be ready for this. Our unions have been stockpiling non-perishable canned food and storing medicine as best as we can... there's no need to stock up on money, that's going to be useless in a little while. I can't actually believe that we got unions across the nation to quietly organize as a single front.

No one thought we'd eventually have someone that'd report to the corporations, but no... people were quiet. We did this right. We got everyone to organize and build a proper support network and gather the resources we'd need in the coming weeks, all without word getting to the corporations who would undoubtedly have prepared would they have known.

Strangers are about to be packed together in the streets in numbers that I don't think we've ever seen before... I hope our disease precautions were taken well enough. I hope we're not responsible for spreading the pandemic even further.

"To the streets we go then?" asked Samantha, looking a little nervous, "Though it might be raining today. It could be pretty miserable outside."

"Love that," I chipped back. Well. We planned to do this today, no going back now.

"You sure we got the correct time coordinated with the other unions across the country?" I half-yelled across the hall.

"Know I do!" replied Ve as they bounced on their toes slightly.

The amount of caffeine they've had is palpable in the air; good lord. A few of us started checking everyone's bags with each other to make sure everyone had what they need: weather protection, food, water for drinking, water for the police's chemical warfare, medical supplies.

"Rules are rules, hun," I said to an elderly man who looked back at me with steely grey eyes, "I know it's gonna be crowded, but you need your cane with you. I don't want you falling over and getting trampled."

"And you think the pigs aren't gonna be targeting me anyways?" he croaked, "I din wanna a problem for ye and slow ye down."

"So, we actually planned for that ahead of time," I reassured him, "You'll be kept near the centre of the crowd, protected by a phalanx of metal trash can lids in case the police start throwing shit." I looked around at everyone else for a moment, took a deep breath, and steeled myself.

"Do it!" I shouted to Ve, "Make the call! It's march time!"

I slipped my bag onto my shoulders and joined the ranks of everyone standing. A bunch of anarchists volunteered to protect us and brought arms to the sidelines of the crowd as we filed out of the warehouse.

A few minutes later, our street was packed, and the march was on. Millions of white-collar and blue-collar workers had finally united across the country, and we were going to seize power back, by force if necessary.

Full of pride, I felt my heart swelling, but at the same time, worry began to set in. We've testified in courts before, we've gotten small unions to fight for workers' rights, we've pressured politicians to pass legislation that actually supports the people, but...

Commitment's pretty scary... this is a full-scale workers' revolution at this point. I've never participated in something this big. The drone of people's footsteps echoes through buildings and we almost sound like an army.

What am I saying; we are an army. We might not be prioritizing bloodshed - or more accurately, expensive non-renewable resources like oil - but we're an army nonetheless... just this time, we're fighting for ourselves and each other, not for corporate interests.

"I'm recording now!" shouted someone from the front. "Everyone ready?" Cheers from the crowd abound.

Thinking about the silence of the buildings around us is so strange... the place where our portion of the march comes from is this series of storage warehouses on the outskirts of the city.

Of all the places to have come from, it's suburban, so none of the businesses or houses nearby have any life in them anymore. We're all out in the streets, save for those unable to come with us.

You would think this would cause us more problems, but no, that's another thing we accounted for. Our union representatives managed to make sure everyone who couldn't participate in the march would be well fed and medicated and protected.

"...wouldn't listen to our demands! They kept serving corporate interests, and the people we voted for never...," I could hear being shouted from the front.

"...get our people together, and now, we're seizing the power for ourselves! These are our demands!" the person recording continued.

This is so scary but so thrilling at the same time. Though, the police are starting to pull in now... things might be about to go to shit.

From the edge, shouts rippled inwards: "Close the ranks!"

Any hole that was previously exposed was suddenly covered by an army of metal trash can lids, and for good measure. Police were pulling in towards us in the tens; I don't think I've ever seen that many police cars in one place.

Other protests had police, sure, but we're undoubtedly on national headlines now, seeing as various people across the country have started voicing demands. The government knows now that we plan to unseat it and replace it with a better system.

"Guy in the front, with the grey shirt, put the gun down now!" an officer yelled as he opened his door and drew on the crowd, immediately cowering behind his car door as several anarchists responded by raising their weapons back at him.

"I don't wanna hurt y'all!" yelled one of the gunmen back, "But if you start shooting at my comrades, honey, we will gun you down! Leave the area now, or join us, you hear? The corps you serve ain't gonna be around much longer!"

Just as they stopped speaking, a trigger happy cop tossed a canister towards the crowd, and honestly, I don't think I've ever seen reflexes so fast before: one of the people near the front bashed it right back at them with a baseball bat with a loud CRAK!

"Wanna try that again, fuck-o?" jeered the batter, laughing as another officer yelled expletives about how hot the canister was before getting sprayed with their own chemical warfare.

"Tell you what, commies!" yelled the officer who had first drawn arms, between hefty coughs, "You stand down now, and we won't put you in the slammer!"

"You think we're that fucking stupid?" bellowed an elderly woman. "You fucking pigs jailed my lover for protesting about Reagan being complicit in queer genocide, and then you fucks gave some bullshit drug charge to keep her imprisoned! I'd much rather be a faggot than fall victim to you fashbastards' shit again!"

How someone covered her with a lid again in time just as a cop started spraying high-pressure water at her is a wonder. They started chucking in more gas, and a phalanx of armed protestors advanced back on them in defense.

I'm not sure who noticed first, but as we started marching forward again, a holler came from within the crowd.

"Feeling pretty trapped here, sisters! They're surrounding us from the back now!"

"Gotta put on the headphones we provided now, y'all!" shouted another, "That's one of their sonic weapons, you'll get hearing damage if you don't protect your ears!"

Make that two. Two of those damn sonic warfare vehicles were pulling in: the police weren't fucking around. A single shot rang out, and then chaos - anarchists started firing back at the police as someone fell - saved by a vest we provided, but badly bruised - and the police fired right back into the crowd in tandem.

"You aren't getting away with that as easily as you thought!" howled a familiar voice. I looked back, only to see a legion of corporate management and landlords. "I don't...," I began.

"Understand?" shouted my previous landlord as a bullet whistled by, the ground positively crackling with discarded casings. Gas rapidly filled the air as people donned protective masks and goggles. "They wanted us to direct our anger at each other, so that we wouldn't fight back against the source of the problem: capitalism. We're all working class, and we're-" another bullet skimmed just by them, and they took a moment to mentally recover.

"Never gonna give you up!"

In your time as a hero you fought many enemies and made many friends. As you are fighting your strongest opponent yet you are on the brink of defeat, when unexpected backup arrives. You thought your friends came to your aid, but are surprised to find your past enemies fighting by your side.

[fiascox0xo]

I guess I’ve always felt like I personally couldn’t be in love with more than one person. Like I could love many people/ many kinds of love. But there’s a “in love” and a “I love you” & “I’m in love with you” and I have never been able to lie to someone and say I’m in love with them when I’m not. I danc around words. But I never say it…. It may seem “oh my fingers were crossed but/ I can’t make my heart stop being in love as much as I wish I could, I know I need to focus on myself. I know I need to not go be messy all over someone else’s life because I am lost I my feelings .

I almost broke when I realized how my “bff” added “Hurricane” in front of my name - may not have been a compliment like I thought. girl thugs. ) I had my feelings controlling me & always felt like I couldn’t bare to keep thugs in - or I would burst. Or I was meant to hold into pain forever if I loved someone who I knew was already with another ; or we didn’t mix well… maybe karmic lessons; maybe just young love & impulses . I do my best not to be like that anymore . I know that I am going to be focusing on my life now. I am going to do what needs to be done- putting myself first and ignoring any kind of romantic relationships or sexual ones. I am Demi’s sexual and went almost seven years celibate- I realized I used drugs and alcohol to numb myself when I would sleep with people who were bad for me. They may drain my energy, be someone who made me feel bad by obviously using me for sex, or pressuring me , negging me, by using me in some kind of malicious act towards others…. I don’t like making people hurt esp innocent people who don’t know what’s going on☸️(my keyboard did that!) <3 I may have thought being seen as scary would be better than being the one bullied- because the I could protect my friends …. However it IS a dog eat dog world - you have to get tough and develop an alter ego to survive sometimes - you do things out of character survival mode. In but making excuses just staying a fact/ you need to forgive yourself and be gentle <3

Dang man- this is so rough - I feel like there’s a huge wad of crumpled up papers - letters unsent - maybe wet- tears? Thrown in water? Growing sorrows? I feel it in my throat and right I between my breasts in the hollow between my ribs ❇️ - I want to speak but I go to say words and I know a waterfall of tears will come, word vomit, or real … I’m not sure how hard I’m going to cry when it hits. I’ve been stoned to keep myself from feeling - put this off for way too long. I feel like I’m a million miles away from Yule & Orion. Surreal - sure, real.

I miss them. I still feel like it was all worth it if it was real …. But - there’s a part of me that still feels sick because I have this feeling it was a trick or some kind of bullying ? Idk revenge sounds so dramatic - but, idk there were so may coincidences I couldn’t ignore them completely. I REALLY NEVER LIED OR DID AYTHING TO HURT THAT RELATIONSHIP .i wanted it to work so badly. Naturally but I sped it up bc im these and I know that…. I meant well I really did. I wasn’t even going to say those words to them. They were pulling away and instead of letting them go I got clingy as desperate and it was so humiliating. I had already show d them such a vulnerable side of me I was so fucking angry as heartbroken. Then after an argument I was triggered by the way they said paying me for my stuff would ve easier that returning it” eve though I said I could got get it without ever seeing them/ and gave them a month than a week & I lost my shit and said keep it - my cptsd was full swing my meds were disrupted & I basically lost my job , that relationship ship, and a hunch of friendships all at once. And I had no one there who I thought would abandon me…. 💔 and some who obviously were not healthy relationships at the time but are bad people and I still love them even if we can’t be in each others lives because of recovery or distance or whatever. When you love someone you want what’s best for them.

I need to love myself the way I love other people. Because I want what’s best for them - I wanna see them so happy as successful. With someone who makes them feel safe and free to fail at things & supported thru their successes highs and lows , life, sickness, health all that shit. <3 but be complete on their own…..

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Anyways I know this rant was long & kind of ping pong-y but I was just trying to avoid saying I really do miss them, it’s hard when I feel this tugging on my heart . I feel like I should get a chord cutting ceremony done. Lol I know I don’t need them for closure. I’ve had them able to contact me this entire time on fb - and I don’t blame them :) as much as it hurts, it wasn’t what they signed up for- as wast what I advertised when we put our cards on the table 🔐 I. Ended up doing exactly what I said I wouldn’t but not really, because like I said. I could okay be I love with or person at a time. I know none of this will probably matter in five months but let’s hope I’m doing better by then🖋️📝❤️‍🔥 from the beginning I told him I was not over you. I was trying to understand what the fuck went down between us because I was so lost in my own mind d that when it ended I was just gone. I never relapsed. I never slept with anyone else- not even when I dated someone else , we only kissed. Because I am processing though my childhood trauma. Fr I am. And also because I wasn’t ready to try to have sex again. I really can’t imagine having sex with a man again. that’s - not to say I could imagine a woman either…. But if I date again it will be a woman probably—- I know I can get feelings too mixed up for hook up culture. I’m not bashing anyone- I just don’t want to have someone having unprotected sex with a random number of people - hidden from me - and not being honest with me. I like being exclusive. I like monogamy but not controlling jealous shit. one built trust and mutual consideration for each others feelings. I know you told me you thought “ we both know we aren’t a good match” - and I never agreed. Not in a creepy way - you never bothered explaining. You said I never listened to you but you pushed me so far away you never actually talked to me. I felt like I didn’t even know what happened. I felt so betrayed as foolish.stupid because I still can’t make myself not think about you . I miss you and wish thugs were different. I was so genuine in everything I said to you even though towards the end my mind was a bit hazy, I never meant to get you or make you feel pressured, or guilted into being with me. But also I almost feel like you never even liked me- it because of a self worth thing because I know I didn’t deserve what you did to me either- it’s the fact that you refuse to see what you did to me as painful yet claimed you wanted to be friends then ignored avoided and tried to bully me out of asking for the things you knew i needed back and saying money would be easier which was insulting . I doubt a male would’ve been tolerated like that. But you had your dick inside me, …. You ,… were closer than anyone in six or seven years and I was caught off guard when you were able to treat me like I didn’t Mean shit to you. And like you were embarrassed of me .

[babygirlwritessmut]

♡︎ part7. picnic

・❥・pairing: vi (arcane) x fem!reader

・❥・ summary: you`ve planned a surprise for Vi, wanting to ask her a serious question.

・❥・ genre: smut + grumpy x sunshine

・❥・ word count: 1.7k

✎ warnings: only fluff tbh

RIDE ON ME masterlist

the last week had been simply amazing. you and Vi enjoyed every moment together. you were constantly surprised that beneath her strong, independent exterior, there was a tender side—a girl who dreamed of love. her outward appearance was like a shield, protecting her from the outside world. yes, she could be cold, closed off, and sarcastic, but with you, she was trying to open up. you understood how much effort that took for Vi, so you valued it immensely.

at the university, your friends were shocked by the recent turn of events. “girl, I didn't even manage to finish my homework, and you not only found yourself a girlfriend, had fun with her, but also aced today's project. do you teach a time management course?” - your friend laughed.

but not everyone took the news so lightheartedly. a few days ago, Vi explained to Kate that they wouldn't be able to see each other anymore. from Kate's angry expression that you'd seen in the campus halls, you figured that she understood the reason. several times, you wanted to talk to her but couldn't find the words. it would have been better to speak to her alone, though, because with her entourage around, that conversation would be even harder. when you told Vi that you wanted to talk to Kate, she just stroked your cheek and said, - “you don't owe her an explanation, cupcake. we weren’t together, you didn’t break up any relationship.”

however, you thought differently. yes, they had never officially been a couple, but there was something between them, and you knew it mattered to Kate. besides, you hadn’t apologized for the scene in the café on the first day, so a conversation was overdue.

today was another Friday, and you were excited for the weekend because you planned a surprise for Vi. you wanted to show her how much these relationships meant to you. after a lot of thought, you decided to invite her on a picnic. it might not be exactly her style, but it would be more fun than sitting in a restaurant. you didn’t want to spend the last warm days of the year indoors, so you prepared everything like in a movie: a basket, a blanket, a few pillows, and some tasty snacks. your eyes sparkled with excitement, and you couldn’t wait for the evening.

your phone buzzed. "I miss you. when do your classes end?". the text made your smile so wide that you had to cover it with your hand.

"at three. by the way, don’t plan anything for the evening. I have a surprise for you," you replied, waiting for her response.

"please tell me it's your delicious signature carbonara," Vi's text made you laugh, remembering your first evening together. "how much things have changed," - you thought to yourself.

"no, but thanks for the compliment. wait until tonight, and you'll find out," you answered and put your phone back in your bag.

the last class felt like it was dragging on forever, you couldn't wait to finally run home and hug Vi. when the lecture ended, you threw all your things into your bag and rushed towards the exit. as you walked down the hallway, you noticed that everyone was turning to look at you with a curious expression. "did Kate spread some rumor about me?" - was the first thought that crossed your mind, "but I don't have time for that."

finally, the fresh air hit your face - it was pleasant and warm, the sun was shining, and you felt reassured that the picnic was definitely a great idea. at the entrance of the campus, your friends stood with strange smiles on their faces.

“what?” - you asked in surprise. – “is there something on my face? why is everyone staring?”

“well, technically... she could end up there,” - your friends burst out laughing at the joke, while you looked at them in confusion.

“are you going to explain, or should I wait until you're done laughing?" - you said, a bit irritated, demanding an answer.

“someone's here to pick you up,” - one of them winked at you.

“who?”

one of your friends nodded toward the bench across from the campus. your mouth literally fell open in surprise. Vi. "what is she doing here?". without wasting a second, you quickly said goodbye to your friends and headed in her direction.

“don't forget to use protection, kids!” - one of your classmates called out behind you, provoking another wave of laughter from your friends.

finally, you reached Vi, and she was smiling at you. her hair blew slightly in the wind, the sun highlighting its beautiful color. she was dressed in black jeans, her white top, and a red leather jacket. "wow."

“hi, you look amazing,” - you said sincerely, touching her cheek.

“you look stunning too,” - she said, taking your hand and pulling you close.

“I hope you don't mind me coming unannounced. I missed you and decided to pick you up,” - she said, gently stroking your fingers.

a smile spread across your face as you locked eyes with Vi. “not at all," - you replied, leaning in to give her a soft kiss on the lips. she was incredible.

“when do I get to see my surprise?” - she asked. "oh, the picnic, right! we need to hurry to catch the sunset."

“I need to stop by home, change, and grab everything we need, and then we'll head to the park,” - you explained, trying not to give away too many details.

“I can't wait,” - she said, kissing you gently on the cheek, which made you smile even more.

on the way home, you held hands as she told you about her training. Vi had found a job teaching kids boxing. your heart was warmed by how easily she connected with the little ones.

“I know you still haven’t found a job. if you want, we could work together. there's an open manager position at the boxing club. I know it's not related to your field, but the pay is decent,” - she said, squeezing your hand a little tighter.

“that sounds great, but...” - you paused for a moment before continuing, “I’m worried that you might get tired of me. you’d already see me every day at home.”

she stopped and took your face in her hands. “cupcake, you could never bore me, don't even think about that,” - she said, stroking your cheek with her thumb. “besides, I can always take a break from you when you're at university,” - she added with a wink and a smile.

“I hate you,” - you laughed, looking into her eyes.

“I think it's the opposite,” - she whispered softly before kissing you. the kiss was passionate, yet so warm.

when you got home, you gathered your things and changed into more comfortable clothes - a simple tracksuit, sneakers, and your hair pulled back into a bun. when you came out into the hallway, Vi was sitting on the couch, her elbow resting on the back of it. she looked at you slowly, smiling as she tilted her head slightly to the side, and said - “you’re the most beautiful girl in the whole world.”

“Vi, are you kidding? I’m literally just in a tracksuit with no hairstyle,” - you said, smiling in disbelief.

to Vi, it didn't matter whether you were lying in her bed naked, your hair all messed up, or dressed in a "simple tracksuit" - to her, you were perfect. she gave you one more look, filled with unmistakable admiration, and then you both took each other's hands and headed towards the park.

after laying everything out as it should be, you pulled Vi onto the blanket with you. the weather was incredible, a gentle breeze tickled your face, the sun warmed your body, and the rustling leaves added a sense of calm. you offered her the snacks you had prepared beforehand, and the two of you started talking. the conversation was simple and easy, never once did you have to plan your dialogue in advance, the words just flowed naturally, and she listened attentively. it felt like you had been talking for ages when Vi looked up at the sky, her face glowing beautifully under the starlight. you hadn’t even noticed it had gotten dark. this must be what it's like to talk to the right person - no need to structure the conversation or tailor your words for a response.

“thank you,” - you said suddenly, the words slipping from your lips.

“for what, cupcake?” - she asked, turning her gaze from the stars back to you. “it seems like I should be thanking you for such a wonderful evening surprise that you planned for us.”

“thank you for being you,” - you said with a warm smile. "I think it's time to tell her the real reason I planned this evening."

“I know we haven’t really talked seriously about what’s going on between us,” - you said, taking her hand – “but I want to tell you that in the short time we’ve spent together, you’ve become one of the most important person in my life.” a smile spread across her face, and she squeezed your hand tighter.

“I don't want this to be just a fling. I want it to be something serious. do you...” - you felt nervous as you approached the question you wanted to ask. “do you want to be my girlfriend?”

she seemed a little surprised, but she held your hand close to her, studying your face. there was a brief pause, and you felt a bit uneasy. "maybe I misread the signals, maybe...?"

“yes,” - she said, her smile practically glowing. “I would be the happiest person in the world if you were my girlfriend.”

Vi pulled you close to her. she kissed you, not letting go of your hand.

“this is the best evening of my life”

[trustlup]

me: mmmmmm

my gf: hhhhhh

[hoshi-y]

A rainy day

Genre : Fluff

Characters : Yugi Tsukasa, Mitsuba Sousuke, Minamoto Teru

TW : None

A/N : None

Yugi Tsukasa

Don't worry ! The rain is always fun to play with !

Tsukasa just LOVED playing in the rain

Especially when it's with you !

He loves to spend a rainy day with his s/o ❤️

biggest concern is when he wants to chase you down a wave of students, they'll start giving you weird looks

But he wouldn't want to get his s/o sick and be gone for days now wouldn't he?

So he got you a raincoat

It was a cute black raincoat that had ducks for designs

Aha he had the same one, Twinning

once there were no more students you two started being chaotic outside

Running, Jumping in puddles

just your usual rainy activity outside

He would definitely make a toad tower AHA

He didn't stop even if the rain got alot harder and it was thundering

"Tsuu.. Can we go inside?"

"Ehhh Just a little bit longer i promise!!"

3 hours has passed lol

Let's just say you haven't went to school in weeks cause of a fever cause by you know who

Mitsuba Sousuke

You're gonna get sick, Idiot.

This guy, i believe hates the rain

He's like a cat at a rainy day, He would cuddle up on you feeling your warmth

then it started thundering

Jumping a little, it was really loud

He made fun of you for getting scared at something like that

He would flex on you that he isn't scared of thunder

surprise he is under the table shivering and cowering

Once he found you outside with Tsukasa playing

He sucked it up and dragged you back inside

"Are you an idiot or something?! are you TRYING to get sick?!"

"Ahaa.. TT"

Would keep you far away from tsukasa

Cause he knows damn well he's gonna drag his lovely s/o out in the rain again

You two would walk around the corridors

Taking pictures of the rain, The fish pond (OMG NENE?!?!), anything that is involved by the rain

or you by secret hahahshsh

Finding any activity to do while the waiting for the ran to stop

Finding a very quiet place, and no tsukasa around

You just cuddled, ehee, he listens to you talk about your day

Making corny jokes he ends up leaving us behind because of that—

The rain stopped

"Mitsuba Look rainbow!"

"Hold still."

"What?"

This guy just loved taking pictures now doesn't he

especially when you're in the photo

Minamoto Teru

Come, I'll walk you home

Omgomgomg Anyone would DIE to be in your position right now

THE Prince and President of the Student council Teru Minamoto was walking you home

How did this happen well

4 words, you left your umbrella

pretty cliché, a guy a girl walking home under one umbrella

aha what could go wrong

romantically wrong —

ehem, You guys decided to stop by a convenience store cause the rain was getting harder and harder making it impossible for two people under a single umbrella to get home

You guys are already there so why not eat am i right?

"[F/N] Do you want anything? You can get any if you'd like, My treat~"

"Ah its alrig Mina—"

"Your total will be ¥400"(Please i had to search up the prices TT)

This guy is unbelievable —

You'd try to pay him back but eh he just ignored you and pointed out some DIY gummies on the shelf

"Oooo, Do you like making gummies [F/N]?"

"Mhm! I think its ve—"

"Your total will be ¥616" (Searched it— again—)

How did you end up in this situation—

You are now making gummies with Teru Minamoto

This guy was nothing like the rumors had said

He's verryy... unique

But nevertheless, you two enjoyed each others companies making DIY Gummies

[gaeasun]

When was the last time

Since I love Fox and this prompt, exhaustion, made me inspired cause Im tired, here’s s little fic. the fluff is inspired by @amikoroyaiart ‘s art of Fox, Cody, and Wolffe all together.

Day 1: Exhaustion

Fox was tired.

But that was nothing new.

If Fox was being honest with himself, he couldn’t remember the last time he hadn’t been tired. It was a constant feeling, sometimes a lighter lethargy that hovered behind his eyes and clung to his yawns. More and more often it was a heavy fatigue that soaked his limbs and mind, dragging him down and making everything much harder than it needed to be.

Fox had accepted this, though. Long gone were his energetic cadet days, running around with his batchmates. Fox was tired, and he was going to be tired until the day he died. Maybe even after too.

The CMO for the Coruscant Guard, Croissant, told him again and again he needed to sleep more than 3-6 hours a night (even that much was nice though). But Fox just… couldn’t. The more he worked the fewer vode were decommissioned by cruel senators, or more relief supplies approved, or less work on the other Commanders of the Guard.

He was the Marshall Commander, he was the vod’alor of Coruscant, he was the ori’vod of the Guard. His vode were under his protection, and Fox would rather let his own soul be cursed than let any of them be harmed from this Force-forsaken war.

It was all Fox could do not to pass out then and there when he was told that the war was over.

Of course, this didn’t mean Fox’s job was over, he knew. No, if anything, he had more to do; the Guard could not slip, not even a little. They were made for war, what if the Senators decided there was nothing more they were needed for? Fox was determined to show they were still useful, that they didn’t have to be decommissioned.

So he worked even harder, slept less, took more shifts, and drank enough caf that it was probably running through his veins at this point.

Fox distantly wondered if his body would simply give out or shut off at some point. Probably soon. It was getting harder and harder to sleep, with his mind and body so used to being awake. Even crueler, every morning was a fight to escape his cot, as opposed to his struggle to stay in it the nights or day before. But he was determined to squeeze every last drop of use from himself, as long as he could help his brothers.

He was supposed to have seen Croissant weeks ago for something about a behavior chip removal. But Fox knew if Croissant got even half a look at him he would never escape the medbay. The chip was activated by Palpatine’s voice, and Palpatine was dead. So he was safe, from that at least.

When Fox opened his door and saw Cody and Wolffe on the the other side, he didn’t have the mental energy to be surprised. He muttered a greeting and motioned for them to walk with him.

“Fox, no.”

The words didn’t really register in Fox’s head. Neither did the firm hand around his vambrace. Fox kept walking like he was on autopilot, tugging loosely against the restraining arm.

“Fox. Fox?”

Fox finally stopped, the gears in his head struggling to turn, to process.

“Yeah. You’re done, vod. Come on.” Wolffe pulled harder until he was dragging Fox back inside his? the room. Office with a bed.

Fox finally found his voice. “Got things t’ do. Le’ go.”

Cody put a warm, concerning hand on his shoulder, and Fox shivered. He didn’t have time for this anymore, soft touches and kindness. That time could be better spent doing something.

“The other Commander are handling it. Thire called us in, told us he was worried about you,” Cody said.

“No. Busy. Lemme go.”

“Absolutely not vod.” Wolffe sat him down on his cot and reached for his helmet. Fox clumsily jerked away. No one had seen him without his helmet in… in… a long time.

“Fox.” Wolffe growled. “You sound like osik, I’m sure you look like osik. You even smell like osik.” Wolffe’s nose wrinkled, and Fox found it funny enough for a slow laugh. “When’s the last time you took a sonic Fox?”

Fox hummed. He didn’t remember. The days sort of all blended together now.

Wolffe snorted. “That’s it. Cody, help me out.”

Before Fox could even wonder, help him out with what? he felt a tugging on his vambrace, before it came off.

They were taking off his armor. He needed his armor.

Fox pulled backwards, whining in protest.

“Fox’ika,” Cody murmured. “Don’t you trust us?”

Fox had forgotten was trust was.

Maybe… maybe his brothers could help him remember.

Fox tried to relax, but ended up tensing more and more as each armor piece was stripped from him. By the time they had taken all of his armor off except for his helmet, he was shaking, shuddering in drawn out intervals.

Stop, he thought. Waste of energy.

He flinched as a hand went on his bare shoulder. “I’m taking off the helmet now,” Cody informed him.

Fox let his head droop down as the helmet came of. His eyes were still closed, though he didn’t remember when he’d stopped opening them.

Warm light from the setting sun brushed his eyelids, and Wolffe rumbled, low and frightening.

“You need to sleep now,” Cody decided.

“Can’t,” Fox whispered.

“We’re not letting you do anything else.” Fox could picture Wolffe’s teeth baring.

“No… can’t.”

There were a few moments of silence, then Fox heard the sounds of more armor being taken off. But his armor was already off?

“We;ve got you, Fox,” Cody murmured. Fox felt strong, warm hands pulling him gently, carrying him off the small cot and onto the floor.

But not entirely on the floor. He was nudged until his head was resting on more warmth, something softer and more alive than his cot. Fox blinked slowly a few times, and saw he was on Cody’s shoulder. Cody wrapped one arm around Fox, and one around Wolffe, who looked relaxed and… happy.

Fox hadn’t been happy in a while. But… he curled up on Cody, and tentatively put a hand on Wolffe’s chest, feeling his heart beat thump thump thump again and again.

The rays of the setting sun were nice, but the warmth of his brothers was even better, chasing away the painful and cold part of his exhaustion.

And Fox thought, maybe he could be happy again.

[adaodinson]

Little bird

Hi! So, it´s been a while since I posted a fic, I apologize for that. These past months have been… weird, to say the least, but now I´m back :)

I recently finished watching Daredevil and Punisher, so of course I have to write for Matt and Frank. I´ve had this idea stuck in my head for a while so here it is, I hope you guys like it. And yes, I recommend all the songs and artists that I mention in here.

Summary: An interest thing about you gets Matt´s attention enough to want to know more about you, but also to be nervous to actually do so.

Warnings: Nothing, I think, just mentions of pain but it´s muscular so… and well, English is not my first language, so sorry for any mistakes.

Relationship: Matt Murdock x gender neutral!reader

You knew moving into a new city (especially one like New York) would be tiring, you knew it would take a lot of mental and physical effort, but this was ridiculous. You had been trying to carry that stupid table upstairs and were halfway when you felt your back couldn´t take it anymore, the table wasn´t big or anything, but it was quite heavy. You had been carrying things inside all afternoon, so it made sense for you to be this tired. You had started off at a reasonable hour, when the sunlight invaded the windows and spread to all corners; now, the only source of light were the weak lightbulbs that hung from the ceiling, and it was getting harder and harder to focus on where to place your next step not only due to your aching legs and back, or the poor illumination, you also started to feel the rush of the other residents getting home from work.

You had only seen your neighbor twice: the day you arrived to take a look at the apartment before buying it, and the one time it took you a while to find your keys and open your door so you bumped into each other on the hallway. You knew his name was Matt, and he knew your name as well, he also knew where you came from, but that was about it. He seemed like a nice person, he was definitely handsome, but there was something about him that you couldn´t quite place your finger on that made him… intriguing.

You had only been living there for about a week, and had had no time to rest or even think for more than five minutes, but what you missed the most was taking your singing classes, or at least getting to seat down while playing games on your phone and sing along to your playlist. Singing was one of your passions, you weren´t amazing at it, but decent enough. You sang all the time: while cooking, while showering, while working, all the time. It made you happy, helped you relax, you just loved it.

As you carried your table through the final stair block, your mind drifted to the next song you would want to practice with your teacher (she was from the same place as you were, and you decided to keep taking classes with her through Skype or FaceTime). It could be “Without you” by Air Supply, ooor Wherever you go by Lola Lennox. You were so immersed in your thinking you didn´t realize you had stopped moving, or that Matt was standing beside you, waiting for you to keep walking.

He was between amused and confused, he could feel in your heartbeat you were happy but tired, he could sense you weren´t moving and also the fact that you were carrying something. He thought you might be resting a bit, but you were only three steps away from the top so that wasn´t it. He cleared his throat in order to make you aware of his presence, and that simple gesture took you out of your thoughts like a lightning, so suddenly that you almost fell on your back. Good thing you didn´t.

-Matt, hi! I´m sorry! I´m sorry! Wait a second- You said as you hurried to walk upstairs, leave the table in front of your door and go back to him. He giggled softly, it was the cutest sound you had ever heard.

-Again, I´m sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. Here, I left the table I was carrying in the hallway so let me help you get to your door- You said as you placed your arm near him for him to notice it and grab it. He did so.

-Thank you Y/N, and you don´t have to worry or apologize, we all get lost in thought sometimes- He said as you led him to his apartment avoiding your table.

-Yeah, I guess we do-.

You got to his door. He opened it, said goodnight kindly and walked inside. Normally you would have wanted him to stay outside with you and talk for a while, but it was not hard to see he was just as tired as you were. You headed inside your own apartment and settled the table in it´s place. You gazed around the room feeling proud that you had managed to put everything inside. For all the bigger things of course you had had help, but the rest were up to you.

You sighed and felt all your body parts urging you to drop to the floor and sleep, you could feel your arms and legs trembling and that familiar knot in your muscles after making such efforts. You headed straight for the bathroom, needing a shower more that anything. In the past few days, you had only showered for the sake of being clean, but not to actually enjoy it. You had to rush and hurry, but now, you took your time to choose the songs you wanted to listen to, humped in and sang your heart out.

The walls of the apartments were thick, so it was really hard to hear what was going on in other rooms, but for Matt this wasn´t a problem. He was reading in his couch when he heard a small hint of a familiar song: “Rock DJ” by Robbie Williams. He made an effort to hear it more clearly, and that´s when he reached it. He distinguished your voice singing along to the song. It wasn´t the best voice he had ever heard, or the most tuned, but it was his new favorite one, it definitely was beautiful. There was something about your passion, your heart being poured into each word you sang that filled his ears like the strong smell of a chocolate cake fills your nose. He couldn´t get enough of it. Even when you sang out of tune, when you ran out of breath, when you failed at singing a difficult note. Also when your breath was just enough, when you hit a hard note like a baseball player hits the ball. All the time, no matter what you were singing or how you were singing it, he found it impossible to focus on anything else.

It became his “ritual”. You had started taking your classes again, so when he learned the time and day you took them, he would try to get home in time to hear you. Queen, Air Supply, Pink, Erasure, Rick Astley, Måneskin and Adam Lambert were the artists and bands that you sang the most, and through you he had found new songs that he adored and re-found old songs that he considered golden. Many times he walked over to the door, ready to compliment your singing after you finished a class, but, what would he say? That your voice had become his favorite sound? How would he explain how he could hear you so clearly? He just couldn´t. Every time he felt ready, with the right words at the tip of his tongue and ready to escape, doubt filled his mind: What if you found him creepy? What if you don´t want to be complimented? What if he said something stupid?

Of course, thinking that you wouldn´t enjoy hearing compliments on your singing was a stupid thought on it´s own. You enjoyed singing so much, but you were quite insecure about it as well. It was really hard for you to sing in front of other people, especially for the first time, and every time anyone complimented your singing, not only did you remember that person forever, but also it always made your day. Oh, but hearing a compliment from Matt, that idea sounded so perfect it didn´t even cross your mind. The gorgeous, nice and mysterious guy from across the hall complimenting you… not even in your daydreams. But just like they say, there is a first time for everything.

Matt was so immersed in the conversation he was having with Foggy, he didn´t stop to hear your heartbeat, to know if you were home. You were.

-I´m telling you, Foggy. It´s just magnificent, the passion and heart they pour into their singing, it´s beautiful. And now I know their class is at 8 every Wednesday, so when I get to be at home at that time it just makes the rest of my week- Foggy had rarely seen his friend this passionate about something, and he was really happy for him, but he wondered why he didn´t try to get to know you. If he wanted to find a good reason for him to hear your singing with you knowing he was, why didn´t he just become friends with you? All his questions were answered when you opened your door with the brightest smile Foggy had seen in a long time.

-Do you really think that, Matt?- you asked almost shyly. Matt froze for a second and then turned around slowly to face you. After seeing that tiny interaction, it was more than clear to Foggy that his friend wasn´t only interested in your voice, he was interested in you.

-Well, yeah, I mean, it´s always very pleasant to hear you- he said with a shy smile.

You were so happy you didn´t even stop to think before embracing the man in a tight hug. You could feel tears ready to exit your eyes and fill your cheeks, but you held them back. He hesitated before returning the hug. You both felt as if your missing puzzle piece was being taken away from you when you parted.

-You have no idea how much it means for me to hear that, especially from you- you couldn´t control that last part.

-Well, hi. I´m Foggy, and I was just leaving- Foggy said happily as he turned around ready to leave.

-No wait! I´m sorry, I´m Y/N. You don´t have to go, I just…-

-Nice to meet you Y/N! And don´t you worry, I´ll get to talk to Matt tomorrow at work, tonight you two should go out for dinner- Foggy answered with a smirk.

-Did you just ask them out FOR me?- Matt said, trying to sound offended.

-Well, someone had to do it- he said with a wink and left.

-Mmmm, I heard about a great Chinese place a few blocks away, if you are up for what your friend proposed- You said trying to measure Matt´s reaction.

-I love Chinese, let´s go, little bird- Matt said as he extended his arm for you to grab. Both of you with the biggest smiles either of you had had for a while, including the one you had when you heard his compliments. Oh, and the smiles would go on with you two, that´s for sure.