#vague venting

[thefroggypond]

“are you okay?”

no dude i had to refund my ghost movie tickets

[crazy56u]

Sometimes you spend some extra time on the toilet, and you let your mind wander, and you wind up imagining an imaginary argument ensuing due to the hypothetical scenario of you snapping and fucking unloading all of your pent of frustrations and anger.

And sometimes doing this causes you to forget how long you were in the bathroom for.

[clownaddict]

Yeah dude I know you didn’t intend to get into this situation.

Yeah dude I understand that it sucks and you really didn’t deserve this.

But oh GOD PLEASE REALISE that you STILL have to take care of this regardless. Shit happened and now you have to deal with it before it becomes an even bigger problem.

[theglitchos]

self censoring and walking on eggshells around certain topics is hard. i'm a coward.

[possibly-in-wonderland]

maybe i wouldn't be irritated if they actually listened and weren't rewarded for bad behavior

[felixisnotfruity]

i srsly messed tf up

[overlookedcaresses]

When your mental health is so depleted that you can't communicate. You can barely bring yourself to get out of bed each day, and even then only if there is some immediate external obligation.

So you collapse onto the couch and imagine your sub walking by. You'd be compelled to reach out, to pull them into your lap where you'd bury your your face against them, nuzzling and grazing your teeth over sensitive flesh, and caress their hips, oh so tempted to rock their body against yours but holding yourself back, only massaging and squeezing appreciatively until you have yourself under control again.

Because it would fix you, for a little while at least, to make them whimper and moan, to make them as wet and needy as they deserve to be. More than the submission itself, you need the reassurance of being able to take care of their needs in order to drown out the malicious voices in your head that are endlessly tearing you apart.

But your sub isn't there with you and you haven't told them what's going on because, besides that the terrible spiral has stolen the ability from you, you also don't want to burden them. They've already told you they want your domination, not your personal problems, so you're going to do your best to respect that.

The only thing stopping you from getting in the car and going to them, to lose yourself in fulfilling their every request, isn't the 1200 miles. You've started the journey dozens of times just in the last month.

No, it's the soul numbing exhaustion and the suicidal idealogy that has you by the throat. You don't want to do that to people you love, leave them wondering what happened when you never arrive or fail to return. And there are too many lonely hours between here and there with no one to answer to but the troll in your brain.

So you sit quietly in your misery and try not to fall apart when they tell you goodbye anyway.

Afterall, you *are* genuinely happy for them that they're doing what they need to in order to improve their lives. You can't be upset that you're one of the things that has to go. Love has to be more than felt, it must be regularly professed and shown.

You should've been better. Now all you have is the regret that you weren't and a love that doesn't have a place to belong.

[cassidy-cat-ghost]

the amount of times I said "I'm gonna kms" or any variation of it, you'd think I'm actually gonna do it

[angelophelias]

FATHER'S DAUGHTER

[emberglowfox]

you ever just

[thefroggypond]

deleted all the writing and art you sent me

didn’t even look at or read it for a final time

felt sorta freeing

i can pretend you never existed now :)

[purplepixel]

[firestarting]

it's not the same anymore

[theglitchos]

existence is not up for debate

[sad-leon]

TW!! Suicide Attempt, Self Harm, Implied Eating Disorder

i forgor the colour behind the dialogue but im too tired to add it now

im so tired and theres no resolution because nothing i can make will make me feel better. i Know my friends love me and think my life is worth living, but when it gets bad it gets Bad and theres nothing to do but pick up the peices

[felixisnotfruity]

chat are u seriois rn