#i had a vague idea and just went for it
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#ah so this is what happens when i allow myself to just draw#i had a vague idea and just went for it#and then this spawned#controlled imperfection#vent art#rise of the tmnt#pixels tortle art#rottmnt#rise donnie#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#posting at midnight
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#ffxiv#oc: eyrie kisne#dawntrail spoilers#mostly just location spoilers#idk i had this location + vague idea for a hot minute so i went and did it#i should have a gpose tag#i am. more fond of them looking at them now than i did a minute ago lmaoooo#im easing myself back into gposing but it's been. a time#anyway im going back to HW
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Kusakabe, dear, you're too beautiful to be saying that kind of stuff
#jjk spoilers#All the prettiest characters were brought back from apparent death#Nobara was okay and it's true that when I read the lawyer's and Kusakabe's fights against Sukuna I thought it was being kept vague#but to pull a Nobara with all of them... idk#No one stays dead here except for the people who actually care for the kids and by that I mean 'including Yuuji'#kinda lowkey bitter about it#Don't get me wrong I like the characters and also they're super pretty but idk It makes death feel cheap? And the high stakes kinda fake?#Choso Gojo and Nanami actual only characters who died apparently#Well. Poor Itadori#And Kusukabe goes and runs his mouth that way in front of the kid. He is not entirely wrong but also he very much is#And yes he also says 'don't worry it's not for you to feel guilty over anything you're just kids' but also he did very much say that thing#about it all being Gojo's fault for not killing Itadori. In front of Itadori who feels guilty for that precisely#and in front of Megumi who asked Gojo to spare him and also went through the experience of Sukuna using his body as well#So Kusukabe's reassurance about them just being kids and not to feel guilty falls a bit empty#It does feel in character but man it truly makes one appreciate the way Gojo and Nanami dealt with the kids a lot more haha#Ui Ui seems like a dear#Anyway... this chapter felt a bit lame for the most part for me? I like the idea of the characters discussing the could have/would have#and feeling guilt and helplessness over their choices but the way it was done felt a bit lame and without any real emotional punch#It felt more like an explanation to the reader in an awkward way. And there's a lot of empty chat about guilt and grief#without any of the characters really giving off a grieving air about everything and everyone they've lost#And this is precisely what I felt was going to happen with this manga's writing haha#I truly don't understand this kind of writing choices. Contrary to some other shonen writers this author did seem to have the potential#to write this kind of thing well besides the worldbuilding and powers and fight stuff. It's truly a pity. It so breaks my heart#And still this is considered one of the good shonens. Well. WELL haha#I do think shonen can be good! I just think it falls almost always even when there's potential into bery shallow writing#I don't know. Maybe I should read that one Alchemist manga#I've been repeatedly told that one's good and it does seem like it doesn't do... this. But I find the art style so not to my linking#I wish I had never gotten into JJK for real for real. I absolutely adore it. I always end up frustrated. It could be so good. Genuinely good#And yet it's just okay in a sort of forgettable way. What a pity#Everything good ever is present but it never dares do anything to fully explore what it sets. It just does the typical shonen stuff
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see I can’t accept charles’ comic background and socioeconomic status as canon for the show because if I did that would mean the whole group would be a bunch of rich kids and that’s a horrifying concept
#ranging from vaguely upper class (niko and charles via comic logic) to presumably quite wealthy (edwin) to straight up ultrarich (crystal)#well off but doesn’t own a mansion -> owns a mansion -> owns several mansions in several countries#but yeah that aside. I don’t like the idea of him being raised upper class or even upper middle and yes I know he went to a private catholic#school that presumably costs a decent amount of money but for one we don’t Know how much exactly by that point in time (I’m assuming it was#more prestigious and expensive back in edwin’s day) and it’s not like middle class or even working class people can never afford#to send their one (1) kid to catholic school. like that’s really not too unusual. I know this is an american example but im thinking about#lady bird and her catholic school situation- her family was financially unstable and still paid for Catholic school because it was (in their#opinion) the best offering for an education in the neighborhood (and as someone who lives in the same city in the same Area of the same#city I can tell you that that choice does make sense even for a non-catholic. the public schools round here can be uhhhhhh rough)#so im seeing charles’ situation sorta like that#his dad seems like the type to want him ‘kept in line’ and ‘whipped into shape’ and I think he’d pay for that if he could manage it#idk something about charles is just……he has an appeal by being the Normal Kid amongst them. not raised as anything special. not having all#his needs met. never expecting to do anything super grand with his life. just a city kid yknow#anyway SOMEONES gotta know how to cook. I don’t think crystal or edwin have ever had to cook for themselves in their lives and niko seems to#live on instant ramen and i mean I bet she can cook very basic japanese meals but that’s about it#please for the love of god tell me charles learned some stuff from his mom and can cook an adequate meal#I know ghosts don’t eat but shut up#rambling#charles#dead boy detectives spoilers
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Land of Spirits - Case Files
Welp, I don't think they're even poetry prompts anymore (which is what I'd meant them to be), they're more like prompted conceptual writing that is sometimes poetry, sometimes short stories, and sometimes a "creative experience" of sorts.
So anyway, I'm sending it late because I needed to format it, but this is my entry for @nosebleedclub's prompt 12, "Land of spirits" and it's clear I didn't get creative with my own titling.
Hope whoever reads this enjoys!
PREMISE: You're given a set of files on data from veterans that have gone through the Land of Spirits. You hope to learn a little from what you're going to face. Oh, and there's some strange notes from a 'seer' at the bottom, but you don't really get what they mean.
So anyway, there you have it. Hope you stick to the non-combatant ones for today, they seem pretty nice.
#creative writing#writing#this was a fun challenge for myself#i had started by conceptualizing colors for each one and then implemented the ideas on the seer notes#the accounts aren't very subtle but yeah they're meant to be metaphors for how we feel or deal with these emotions#spirits#land of spirits#creative writing prompts#files#case files#ghost files#kind of#i think these spirits are like haunted ghosts/magical creatures#idk i just went with wildly vague concepts#sounds cool tho
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cuz i Don't need it to be detailed or very realistic with my worldbuilding! because L. ron hubbard existed at some point and
#just me hi#a post that does actually have a slight chance of putting me in some small danger Lmfshvhjgh#i have a minor interest in. the ology of science (m not gonna tag it Lmao) and i like to rotate my smaller interests almost on a#monthly schedule so hfbsh#/anyway reeeeed n i get into some debates about what makes 'sense' in my worldbuilding and what doesn't#which is mostly very helpful and making the stuff up in the moment is a greater part of how i function hfbshv#but it Does also put my brain onto overthinking the whole thing like. what specific type of element do generators run off of i NEED to#know [<- this is simply not true]#and like i Could sink a lot of time into figuring out how exactly different towns + cities economies function but am i the one to do all#that? i should hope not!! i'm just the 'has too many thoughts' guy. we need a different guy for the money stuff pfshvh#and it doesn't reaaaaaaaaally matter. in my heart anyway#//anywhoodle doo it's gonna be 1 soon and i am still working on a background to this piece#i have/had a vague idea of a city but i could not figure out how to translate it into an actual static image so i'm substituting. and i am#Displeased about it !! it is not turning out very well bfhsv :'3#i Really Really wanna learn to do backgrounds well. sighs wistfully#somewhere.. beyond the sea... she's (well-made backgrounds) there waitin for me (to practice)..... my lover stands on gol-#Oh bedtime alarm number 3 just went off khfsvjfsd#iiii should.. uumm...#OH wait wait wait we can pause on the drawing for a second i think i'm chilled out enough to start writing again Loll :D#yippee!! woohoo!!!#rule though. bedtime at 2. i can Not stay up til 3 writing like i usually do that's just ridiculous#//anyway yea goodnight happy halloween y feliz dia de los muertos n toodles ^w^
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2.0
#the murderbot diaries#murderbot 2.0#i had a different design idea for it that was basically a vaguely secunit shaped blob of static and error codes#but i didn’t know how to draw that so i just went with what i was picturing while reading. which is just a mini secunit
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MiqoMarch'24, Day #7: - light -
A bit of a different take on this prompt, today is all about sin eater D'nyr from the point of view of an alternate timeline where he really did become a Lightwarden!
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀- observations log. 1/5/XX, day.?? - ……..thus the creature was bestowed the title of Forgiven Temperance by its former allies, following the meaning of self-sacrifice and asceticism; excessive restraint/repression of one’s self for others benefit. At his core, one can suppose that this was both his fatal flaw and driving virtue! The poor soul… To date, nobody knows for sure what the beast fully looks like, not even those who fled the site of its transformation at the depths of The Tempest! It has scarcely budged from its initial location a few moons ago… obvious logistical reasoning aside, only a scant few exploration teams have had the wherewithal to venture down there past the safety of the Ondo's dwellings. Reports have led us to believe that the creature is covered in sharp spines and has monstrously large "claw-hands" (as it was described), or possibly some sort of scorpion-like tail as well? Its profile is unclear and hard to make out in the murk from such a distance, but one thing is unanimously clear; all of our teams have fled after seeing what they claimed to be "horrifying gold eyes" staring back at them! Yet the beast has not once given chase upon sighting our researchers, which is just as unsettling as it is perplexing… Due to the unique constraints inherent to its location, we are at present unable to cull the Lightwarden and return the night to the region of Kholusia. Mercifully, its light has not pierced anywhere else due to the sheer distance from the water's surface acting as a convenient attenuating filter, but one could surmise that if the beast were to emerge then all of Norvrandt would be under light pall again… its effect on the populace is quite clear: residents have responded with equal levels of fear and also apathy to this situation, as while some are content to live their lives as they had been before (with the beast effectively "out of sight and out of mind" and therefore not a problem), others are starting to become fearful of the ocean entirely (a complicated notion, due to their relative proximity at all times to it)! Disquieting rumors have started to spread amongst fishermen and sailors alike, that if you venture too close to the ocean you'll be dragged under by the Lightwarden, never to be seen again… though one would hope most people would question how bogus this sounds-- if you'll excuse me interjecting my own personal opinion... at this juncture I simply cannot see the Lightwarden ascending from the briny deep just to prey on hapless passersby when it has showed absolutely no inclination towards moving from even just one single spot-- it has nonetheless had a noticeable impact on the region's imports and exports of fish, so now we must find an effective way to quell the people's terror to rectify the economic impacts alongside dealing with the creature too………..
------ (as a bonus, have the rough draft of his Lightwarden trial encounter under the cut! because I am sad it will never get to see the light of day otherwise and I was proud of the concept years ago lmao)
CONCEPT: . Overall theme is “the breaking down of appearances to reveal what was always there, but hidden away”-- stage and boss both change per phase to reflect this, going from a more idealistic “this is what the WoL as a sin-eater would look and fight like” to a “ohhh god what is that that’s not the WoL anymore” . Mechanics are based around D’nyr’s repressed feelings towards others (loneliness, anger/the need to lash out sometimes, not always saying how he feels, his dislike of others putting him on a pedestal, etc.) and the world at large (eg. the fragility of life, futility of some things, etc.) and his unfulfilled hopes and wants (to live unfettered by responsibility to the world, to settle down with a family of his own someday, etc.)
PHASE 1: . Certain mechanics grant a stacking buff to the boss (Fervent Denial), which is necessary to progress the fight! These mechanics have an interrupt bar and represent the feelings and things that D’nyr has repressed-- if the cast is interrupted, the buff will not be given, increasing the flat % of damage taken from the ultimate attack at the end of the next phase [it's calculated based on the damage dealt to the boss in the first phase (% thresholds that indicate how much it weakens the overall ult damage by), as well as the actual phase progress bar (below 80% is no extra damage, at 80-90% it is +3% extra damage, 90-99% an 5% extra damage, and 100% a flat wipe)] . In a meta sense, the only way to put him down for good is to damage him when he is at his most vulnerable (ie, his final form), and the only way to get him to show that is to let him go berserk and not deny him the things he’s been disallowing himself all this time-- as D’nyr at his core would never allow himself these actions, it causes a “breakdown” of the mask (literally, the bosses’ one too [he has a blank slate mask with a golden kintsugi X like D'nyr's scar, for context]) and internal walls holding him back, fracturing his perceived sense of self and causing him to shift into a form that represents all of these denied things, which is what truly needs to be destroyed/purified! . Normal mode has 7 chances to grant Fervent Denial giving some leeway for mistakes (the buff stacks cap at 5 however, so it is not possible to get 7 stacks despite there being opportunities to do so), but Extreme only has the exact 5 chances needed to progress! If players have not let the boss reach at least 5 stacks by the time the hard-enrage longcast goes out, the party will wipe. . Fervent Denial also slightly increases damage dealt by the boss, so he will gradually hit harder and harder over time, plateauing right before the phase change. . After the boss uses its phase-shift move (what would normally be the yet-unnamed hard-enrage longcast), the stacking buff will disappear and the boss will become untargetable, beginning the DPS check phase.
DPS CHECK: . Unfinished from here on out-- but basically beating up… some kind of add, and while you do that the boss' mask slowly cracks with bright light before shattering into his second form and unleashing his ultimate attack (he becomes more agitated and spiny-looking but I never finished designing any of his forms so just imagine the possibilitiiiiies)
PHASE 2 & 3: . To be continued……. or not! maybe someday :')
#this was SO MUCH FUN#I've had sin eater stuff in the works for years and some finished scraps of info here and there but nothing complete enough to show#it's basically a few pages of bullet points spitballing various ideas but when I went to actually draw out and design the bastard-#-I could never make something I was completely happy with so I kept dropping the idea for later and never really finished it#it's a shame because I can FEEL internally like I have a great design somewhere in there but I can't seem to put it to paper well.......#I figured journal-style prose would be ideal for today bc I can be as vague as I want to explain the lack of concrete design lmao#ALSO I had none of the tempest stuff written beforehand and it all just snowballed and led more and more into itself as I wrote-- fantastic#it just writes itself and I'm so fucking jazzed about that because it's giving me fresh ideas to work with and augfljgfdk I LOVE IT#MiqoMarch2024#MiqoMarch#ffxiv#d'nyr fellcrest#d'nyr
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I can go on that ramble about the future and housing and aromanticism though now. It’s like man, the future is already something that is so inconceivable to me. To then have the sexuality that does not allow me to slot in the cookie cutter you find a romantic partner that you end up moving in with is terrible. And like In this economy I sure can’t live alone, and I know at least when I’m sick I desperately want someone to be there. And then there’s I’m likely to move around a bunch how do you deal with that housing, other than the work having paid housing. like constantly having to find somewhere that’s looking for roommates and it isn’t terrible? And then long term, when I find a job I stay at for a while (that’s remote so I’d love to live in a remote place) is it like I find a place to stay and then I’m stuck there forever and I just have to hope that I make good friends at this new place. (Friends that don’t want to live exclusively with a romantic partner no less.) I want to live with close friends so bad and I’m not sure if that’s a feasible thing for my future. I’m a person that has so much hope so I have to assume that yes it will work out, I do believe that. But man just hearing someone mention it, sparks that hope.
#… vaguely related other way too personal ramble#I need to try so hard to keep my friends for a long time. I want it so much#but I’ve never had close friends till now and once I went to a different period in my life the friends I had were gone#and Ive made really close friends now in college and one day I was talking with one of them on a walk home and mentioned still being friend#in 5 years. and they were like that’s not happening this friendgroup isn’t sticking together that long and they were right#at least for them specifically they were the one that came back worse and it’s a big group#there are most definitely different groups inside it and that makes me worry if once I finish college I’ll still chat with them at all#and oh hey tying this into another thought I had earlier… I’m planning on studying abroad next semester (that’s the application I’m procras#inating rn lol) and I’ll be like 8 hours in the future and I guess that’ll be the ultimate test on if I can really keep friends#a trial run before I graduate#and I won’t let this thinking of the future ruin my time now I know that doesn’t help but still.#well… actually summer sorta also is a trial run. and I still talked with them just less often and in a different way… it’s gonna be okay#this is a post i made#uh I am bad at tagging if things are vent posts or not#vent#oh I completely forgot to put the online part of the tag ramble! Ive made quite a few friends online and we talk for a while and I love the#and then it’s a every once in a while going hey I still care about you but I can’t hold a conversation for the life of me#and now there’s. you know who. who I care about so much and we say things I never imagined people saying about me#and I am so scared? (… sure) that that’s gonna go the same way. and I’m not sure reassurance on any of this will really help I think it’ll#just be I will only be less scared of the future as time passes and it’s proven to be wrong#mh hit the I want to keep this all inside and not let this out to not make other people think about it thing#… okay now I need to make a joke that is so tonal whiplash cause uhhh okay siffrin#… I need to go to sleep it’s late I’m sure that’s why all these feelings are being brought up… ’I’m fine’ as great role model siffrin says#… but it doesn’t feel real that people care about me. that I do actually have an impact. that I’m actually a note in someone’s story#I know it logically everyone I’ve ever known is part of me but it’s so hard to imagine that applies to me in others#okay I’m gonna go shower and go to sleep. I wanna say ignore this post but that’s not a good idea I don’t think#though just talking into the void does help a lot. I’m great at talking myself into believing that things are a okay if I just talk about i#… this wasn’t supposed to be a vent or be so long geez
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Want to talk about a thing but I can't do it online for reasons and I can't irl because I'll just start crying so I just sit there vibrating and thinking about how much I hate all this shit. lovely.
#went to add that I know it's not the fault of the person I had to deal with but I hope he has a shit time. and you know what.#I don't. if you can manage be a fucking dipshit and still seem just as nervous and scared as me in that situation.#I guess you earn catching a fucking break. hope some day we both won't have to go through that. here's to that#here's also to something else I will not name but yeah. hopefully soon.#sorry for being vague haha but talking about any of this somewhere people can find is a bad idea#but I need some outlet#faksyan talks
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God . . . imagine thinking Laios is a bad person who doesn't care about people. actual insanity.
#yea this is about you know who's 'review' again. it's on my mind now that i'm trying to finish the series. sowwy. ;9#making this unrebloggable from the getgo this time so that drama obsessed freaks can't get their hands on my ramblings again. fuck off lmao#anyways imagine thinking that. IMAGINE THINKING THAT HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HIS SISTER. GET WELL SOON OR FUCKING PERISH.#EDIT HEY I'M NOT QUITE DONE ACTUALLY:#i heard someone else say this and now that i finished the series i honestly gotta agree on some level#i think this specific YTer did genuinely try to give the series as a whole another shot (since she was only watching the anime at first)#but then when she went into the manga was so fucking mad at her viewers and fans straight up disagreeing with her personal interpretations#(which were wrong but she took them down the dumb as fuck and extremely wrong road of All of These Are Factual Actually Sorry)#that she only really skimmed the manga (or looked at footnotes/summaries) and took up a soapbox of I Know Everything About This Thing Now#and doubled down on her just completely wrong and honestly dumb opinions and interpretations being presented as fact out of pure spite#it legit sucks so fucking bad. cause like i know and have actually seen her audience who haven't ever touched the series#(or some that maybe started it and have some sort of beef with it for one reason or another and had those feelings validated by her)#parrot back these ideas as if they're true! i partly know it cause it happened with me and her talking about fucking ****** ********!#like legit i sometimes check like her channel or her blog on here every so often and i saw a post of hers on here#where someone in the replies just. blindly agreed with her! and called Laios a bad person probably without ever checking DM out themselves!#which is crazy cause this YTer used to call out like other YTers not taking hard stances#feeling they have to cloak whatever opinions or stances they have in a million This Is Just My Opinion disclaimers etc#which made me realize Oh Hey Yea They Do That like i used to like that about her!#but. you know. if her audience isn't forming their own opinions about a series and just parroting back her own to validate her being wrong.#then it's fine. i guess. epic echo chamber moments or what the fuck ever.#okay NOW i'm done i think. this time. i like to bitch and moan so i might vague post about her again probably. tee hee. :3
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So... Thad. Tell us. Just how 'human' is Match, if you know what I mean. Does any of Bad Dragon's lineup look a little familiar? 😏
Accepting || Ask My Muse Anything It could be anything at all, no limits, no restrictions, and my muse has to answer to the best of their ability. (Note: I'm not being canon compliant for this question; We're having a lil fun here.)
Thad only manages to get out an embarrassed stuttering of, "I— I'm not— I wouldn't know tha—" before he's shoved out of the way, a flash of gold shines on the hand doing the shoving, and he tumbles over the back of the sofa while a potential future version of himself takes the place of where he was standing just moments before.
"I'm not—" The older version of Thad begins before glancing in the direction the very dazed present-day version of himself and then back to the anon, "We're not one's to kiss and tell, but seeing how there's no answering the question without present-day Thad embarrassing himself to death, I'll take the reins here. Just remember Match's mine, I'm just sharing some scientific facts. Though don't let Match know I said anything." He says before adding with a smirk, "Not that he has anything to be ashamed of."
He chuckles, "Heh, cute, anonymous, but honestly? You're not too far off the mark in your comparison. However, they certainly can't compare to Match in my personal opinion. His, ahem, equipment has a similar structural design to that of a cisgender human male, but there are apparent differences on a first look regarding aspects such as shape and texture. However," He flashes a smile at the anon, "those intimate details are for me to know and for you to never find out."
"Honestly, I'm more surprised you're not asking about his other differences. The prominent fangs. The unique vocalizations such as growling. Elevated temperature. And more." He raises his fingers one by one, "Kryptonians are incredibly fascinating."
#ask#Anonymous#V: One of Many#No specific Ma/tch's were involved with this question.#that's just the tag for au shenanigans when main verse Thad can't actually answer the question. Basically he's one of many potential future#nsft#//to anyone on my dash who knows more about kryp///tonians don't take this seriously.#//I went through the whole gamut of emotions to answer this question and oscillated between vague and explicit. Landed on vague/coy#nsft ask#//i do love the fang headcanon though and just had to mention it. I also know purring it's a popular one but I think with match personally#//he would vocally growl more like in his tt appearances. I really do love the idea of making kryp//tonians more alien-esque rather than#them being very humanoid aliens. So this where that's coming from. Just this once i won't be canon compliant.
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What the fuck do you mean he woke up in his coffin alive, with like all of his injuries from his death, cracked open the wooden lid of his casket with nothing but a belt buckle and his hands, dug 6 feet out, while running out of oxygen, walked 12 and a half miles (and then maybe got hit by a car??!?)
And then during his Robin run, there was of course when he got beat up by the Joker and then got up to get the ropes off his mom
In legends he got beat up by an angry mob, was hospitalized, looks like he has a head injury as well as a broken arm and leg, and he just. Walks out and manages to find his way to the next gathering angry mob to try and stop em
He will not stay down and he will throw himself back into it as soon as he physically can, sooner sometimes
#also his “ive gotta do what i can to help-- even if it kills me!”#im. very normal about that#<-lying voice#is now a good time to mention i think of jaybin as vaguely suicidal and was very aware the warehouse could be a trap but went in anyway#because he had the chance to help and he doesn't value his own life that much. if i die i die kinda attitude. so long as he dies TRYING#which makes how they talk about his death even worse than it already is if you see it through that lens.#with the idea he didn't think he was going to survive#because no smidge of recklessness or an idea he could possibly fight the joker alone is there. just a child whos willing to die#also he gets beat up more than this theres more examples. but he just doesn't always very dramatically get up#im not. main tagging this. too embarrassed sorryy#dc liveblog#comic reference#crazy quilt. thats a notable fight too. he gots up rather quickly from that attack to get right back into it#apparently he took “at least 3 severe blows to the head”#he did get shot during the mad hatter fight but that one struggles to count here.#he was still back in the field sooner than he probably shoudve been#actually. how much does jason get hit in the head alone. here alone we have the mob. the quilt. and the joker as examples#literally no wonder he's wears a helmet after coming back#he shoukd keep the helmet#jason todd
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my favorite thing about rhett and link doing gay shit is that the whole gang gets back together to reblog the same gifset a hundred times with varying tags expressing fondness
#we used to have mere crumbs#we needed magnifying glasses to see their pinkies brush together against the table#and then have to listen to a 10 min vaguely no homo monolog#now they're just gargling each others balls on gmm every day like 'this is FINE this is what we've ALWAYS DONE'#all you new kids have NO IDEA the struggle we went through#i had to walk barefoot through 20 ft of snow to get to rhink content#anyway i haven't watched the video yet but I'm already a big fan
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the problem with 'why don't you just make an oc' with homestuck specifically is that so much of what i like about homestuck's characters is reliant on the text to the point of being impossible to extricate or replicate. if i wanted i could absolutely take some of the elements i like to make ocs, and i probably will at some point, but it's not just the characters and their traits on their own, it's their place in and treatment by the text itself that is compelling to me
#now that i think about it i'm not good at developing ocs if i don't know what their story is or what role they play in the narrative#and i haven't had any good story ideas in a long while so most of my oc ideas remain vague concepts#i did accidentally recreate the alpha kids about five years ago though. my brain was like 'oh you need a friend group that falls apart?#good news my friend we have some templates already locked and loaded'#and i didn't notice until a good while after i got back into HS and went 'god damn it'#THERE WAS EVEN A KID GRANDPA. HOW. how did i do that on accident#at that point i did consider just yoinking that story and making it about the actual alpha kids. maybe some day.#problem was it was set in the 20th century which suits jane and jake just fine but not so much dirk and roxy
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for the first time ever I set a long term goal for myself to work towards (save enough money for a six month solo backpacking trip) and life really does feel a bit better thanks to it. knowing that there's something I'm looking forward to. that I'm giving this desk job two years. that it has a purpose. so far my life has been very "let's just see what happens idk I don't have plans" but this? this feels good. and for someone who was so depressed I barely got out of the house two years ago it feels like a huge step tbh
#personal#sofi.txt#''running away to another country won't mysteriously fix your mental health you know'' well WATCH ME#the only future i ever knew was decided for me by outside forces but then i said no I'm doing my own thing#and idk what's going to happen or what I'm gonna do or what job I'll have or how long#moving to dublin was one step and then i had time off so i went on a trip twice#all the while watching a few insane journeys of some solo travellers#and for years i was like damn i want to do something like that#but my dreams were also very vague like i couldn't believe it could ever happen#but then i had this idea for a trip that wasn't really done yet (!!!)#like haha what if i did that. jk. unless#i saw how long it would take how much money I'd need how long it'll take me to save that#if it's doable and where exactly i want to go. and it is. so i decided that's what I'm going to do#2026 here we go#I'm not saying where I'm going BUT it will cover 3 continents#(if anyone's worried i have travelled solo a lot these past two years just never that long)
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