#until you turn into something cruel and yet so desperate for something resembling love. it fucked with my pre-developed brain

[chicafinal]

i joke about armand but i remember being 14 and reading his backstory on the vampire lestat and crying for an entire afternoon until i got a headache

[wickedsmille]

jaytim drabble

Some suggestive themes like, ya know, doin' the nasty and merc'ing people. And not edited.

Ask him if he thought his night would end with Tim Drake standing outside his door, body wound tighter than a spring and eyes eerily void of anything resembling an emotion, asking for Jason to fuck him.

Go ahead.

Yet, as improbable as the situation seems, Jason is lying next to Tim on his moth bitten excuse for a mattress with a cigarette between his fingers and drawing shapes in his mind's eye in the popcorn on the ceiling. Tim is next to him, on his side and facing away from Jason. They've gone not once, not twice, but three times. He'd love to say he'd adamantly refuse another roll in the sheets but Tim, objectively, is gorgeous. Turning his head, Jason thinks he looks even better covered in his marks.

Turning his head enough that his eyes can rove over Tim's back, Jason allows himself to revel in the souvenirs Tim will have to bear on his walk of shame out of Jason's apartment. Bruises and bite marks, hand prints and scratches. A primal part of Jason preens because those are from him, show Tim is his if only for a night. The soft, artistic side of him thinks Tim looks beautiful awash in pinks and reds and purples.

Jason ruthlessly smothers that side of himself and allows the animalistic part of his brain to take the wheel.

Apparently what Jason's hindbrain wants is to reach out and press his nails into a particularly nasty bite mark on Tim's shoulder. He smears the blood dribbling down with his thumb and swipes it across Tim's shoulder blade, a wing befitting of a broken bird. Another brush stroke on Jason's canvas bringing Tim that much closer to a true masterpiece.

Tim hisses in response and jerks away. He glares at Jason over his shoulder and scoots away as much as the tiny mattress they're sharing will allow. Not trying to hide the cruel curve to his crooked grin, Jason laughs. It's funny. Tim was just begging him to go harder, push further, but Jason is getting rebuffed for breaking the unspoken agreement between them now that it's over to say nothing, do nothing then pretend it never happened.

Fuck Tim. He's feeling a little used and rightfully so.

Something is up with Tim, not that they've talked about it aside from some quick words double checking Tim was of sound mind beforehand, but it's obvious in the desperate way he wrapped his hand around Jason's fingers as he choked him out while fucking him hard enough to make Jason's end table rattle. The way Tim kept saying harder, harder, harder as Jason used his hand in Tim's hair to press his head into the sheets and the other on his lower back to keep him pinned in place as Jason made good on his promise to use Tim's body like his dick's own personal playground. Or the way Tim continually goaded him, intentionally provoking higher and higher levels of violence till Jason reached his limit and told Tim to shut the fuck up or get out in a deadly serious tone that brooked no argument.

A wave of anger washes over Jason as he stubs out his cigarette on the floor and scowls. When he shifts to lie back again, he keeps rolling so he's on his side with the long expanse of Tim's back hovering in front of him. He reaches out and runs his hand through the short hairs at the base of Tim's skull, runs his fingers through the strands till they're long enough for him to grip them tight and yank Tim's head back. Jason pulls until Tim is forced to bow back and meet his eyes.

"Why me?" Jason demands.

"Like recognizes like," Tim says coldly.

"Try again," Jason refutes before tightening his grip.

Tim hisses and winces but Jason refuses to relent even though it earns him a poisonous look from Tim.

"I'm not lying," Tim tells him.

Jason doesn't believe him. "Lying by omission counts."

Tim grabs Jason's wrist and clenches his hand so hard Jason can feel the bones grinding together. "Would you have said no?"

He hums and bobs his head from side to side like he needs to actually think about it. Really, he's rallying every bit of League honed Bat training to convince Tim he isn't lying when he says, "Yes, but you caught me on a good day."

Turning head away, Tim takes on a thousand yard stare, eyes unseeing as he slowly releases Jason’s wrist. He rakes a hand through his hair and twists his fingers at the base so he can pull. Jason’s a little jealous of Tim's hand because that's his move. As frightening as the thought is, Tim's hair is his to pull now. See, growing up like he did, people learn to sink their teeth in the good things, good people, and never let go. At least not until there's no good left in them.

“I killed someone tonight,” Tim finally admits, voice barely above a whisper but packed with so much regret and guilt and disgust it's loud in the space between them.

Jason learned awhile ago to not get trapped in the noise. Snorting, he reaches for his cigarettes and pops open the top. “Welcome to the club,” Jason tells him sardonically as he nips a cigarette out of the pack.

Tim’s focus snaps back to him, the twisted knot of self hatred shoved to the side in favor of being angry at someone else. “Really?”

Lighting up, Jason moves his gaze slowly from the tips of Tim’s toes all the way to the uncertain fury in his eyes. “Really?” he parrots mockingly. “What, you want a medal?”

“Fuck you,” Tim responds coldly.

“Ooh, I'm so scared,” Jason says, raising his hands in surrender. He has to laugh because this whole thing is hilarious. Just this once he’ll take pity on Tim. “If you think none of the scabs Dick or Bruce have beaten to a pulp didn't die on the operating table, you're out of touch. Emergency services trots them away breathing and everyone goes wild but nobody looks too close after, right? Reports to write, cute family dinners to have. Important stuff, right? Not the sad sack who got kicked so hard in his ribs a bone splinter broke off and he died drowning.”

Tim doesn't say anything but Jason doesn't need him to. Jason likes to make people hurt and he's good at it.

“You're not special,” Jason informs him, “just more honest.”

All at once, Tim looks queasy and elated, like he’s been absolved and damned in the same breath. He thinks Tim looks good like that, in a shattered kind of way. It's tough having your core beliefs so thoroughly pummeled into dusty remnants of morality you're left to sift through to find a purpose. Any purpose. Even if it means digging your fingers into the cracks of your psyche and pulling till everything spills out. He wonders what’ll come tumbling out of Timmy.

Reaching over, Tim takes his cigarette and sucks down the smoke. “This tastes like shit,” Tim says as he breaths the smoke in Jason's face.

“Yeah, and fake ass stress relief. Are you done moping? Self flaggeration isn't the kind I'm into.”

“Okay,” Tim agrees easily, taking another drag before handing it back. He nods to himself absently, hands fluttering around his arms and legs. Restless and untamable in the way he's fighting himself and what he thought he knew. 

“Yeah, okay,” Jason says. In his head, he's already planning all the ways he'll wreck Tim now that he's got his teeth in him.

[yuseirra]

It's become an annual routine at this point (I'm so sorry for writing a lot.. I JUST HOPE THEY JUST GET THIS WHOLE STUFF OVER WITH) here's my personal take? thoughts about hikaai and aqukana too this time.. I went on about it AGAIN in my notes, I'll share it here too~ It's been fun sharing!

I feel like I'm aware of how the outcome would be for those two ships. I just have no idea how they would get there and how long they'd beat around the bush with it and that's what makes me nervous... I'm sure, but at the same time, I'm unsure, ambiguity is what makes me think and write, so I hope they just.. provide the goods and the answers soon. Of course, I'd love it if they handle it in depth and in a delicate way and make it a piece worth remembering... but it feels like having taken an exam and not having your results turned in yet, it feels really tense... well, it'll come sooner or later. If I'm wrong, then I'll just accept it, what more can I do? :)

(below is originally written in different language translated through chatgpt 4.0 'n read over-edited.. thanks chatgpt.. ;v; can't write the same thing twice, like I always say)

This is just my personal thoughts…

I always follow canon storylines when it comes to shipping, so I ship based on the story, not the other way around.

When I say I ship a couple, I never entertain thoughts like, "Oh, they don’t have feelings for each other" or "They must be enemies." I never think about it that way. I tend to follow the really obvious and mutual ones so I never worry about these things.

This series really did something… Aqua’s parents are probably at their lowest point of any couple I've ever shipped. With the plot being... him being accused of her cause of death and their son trying to get revenge on his dad, yeah... it's hard to get worse than that...

However, when it comes to interpretations about this couple, I’m right. I’m sure I’m right.

The reason I keep bringing this up isn’t because I favor Kamiki or anything. (Maybe I kind of do now, but that only came from AFTER I read Ai's feelings towards him.)

It’s because it really bothers me. To me, this character doesn’t seem like the type of person who could take such strong actions. I know I should wait until the end to make a judgment, but it’s been bugging me because it feels like he’s getting beaten down both in and out of the story.

If it turns out he’s actually a psychopathic criminal who masterminded Ai’s death, sure, I’ll call him out then, but…

The more the story unravels, the more I feel like it’s the opposite, and that’s why I’m so concerned. Something about it just doesn’t feel right, and it makes me uneasy. I don't feel like he's being treated the way he should be.

At this point, I’m even thinking… When Yura died, Kamiki met with her in advance and told her to watch her step, right? If he was going to kill her, why would he give her information that would interfere with his plan? Could it be that he actually didn’t want her to die?

Is he cursed or something? Like, "Everyone with white starry eyes(double) around you will die, try to stop it if you can." Maybe he’s under a curse? I can’t even tell if he’s the type to kill anyone. (By the way, if that’s the case, Aqua and Ruby are both in danger. Both of them have white double starry eyes now…)

I was thinking that maybe after Ai died, he was desperate and tried all sorts of things. But at this point, I also feel like maybe he doesn't have it in him to be cruel enough to actually harm anyone. Maybe he didn’t do much and just lived quietly. Quite a stretch, isn't it? but the way he behaves seems to be so mild.

Looking at his expressions and personality, Kamiki seems more similar to Ruby than Aqua. Those two really resemble each other. (It made me realize how great the author is at crafting characters—at first glance, it seems like Aqua takes after his dad, but the more you look, Ruby resembles him too. Even while Ruby is a splitting image of her mom.) Their smiles are really similar—Kamiki and Ruby’s. But to me, Kamiki even seems gentler than Ruby. Ruby has more backbone. She can lash out, and she's pretty stern and strong and determined in her own way. Not saying I know enough about Kamiki to decide what he can do, but I never see him trying to blame anyone. Or fighting back for his rights. Would that be because of his past that he's went through? It's kind of sad how he just lets people do whatever they want with him.

Kamiki + Ai = twins, right? Ai can be sharp and solid. She has the backbone and the guts. The twins take after Ai more in terms of strength of character, I think, rather than their father.

So, if Kamiki were to go through a dark phase, I feel like he’d act more like Ruby than Aqua. I mean, Ruby did have her phase, but she still didn't cross the lines that would make her irredeemable.

I’m starting to think that maybe Kamiki really “didn’t do anything at all.”

And doesn’t that fit with Ai’s message, to have asked to help him?

This is a bold theory, and I’m not saying he must be completely innocent. I think the chances are low. Still, I hope you take a closer look at this character. He seems to be the type who would feel excessive guilt over things he didn’t even do, blaming himself and having extremely low self-esteem. That’s why, when people accuse him of being a criminal, he'd respond something like, "Yeah, it’s all my fault, I deserve to die." I think he’s trapped in that kind of vicious cycle of misunderstanding because he accepts those kinds of accusations out of self-hate. Judging by the way he speaks, he seems to be deeply self-loathing, while always speaking very softly.

I like Ai. I ship this couple because Ai liked him… The dad is handsome, but he wasn’t a major character. Up until the flashback- movie arcs, I thought, "He had a tragic past, but if he hurt Ai, there’s no room for excuses." But now, it seems like he really didn’t do anything.

You know that analysis I did yesterday? The one about the panels in the manga that recur throughout the series? If those specific panels with the black background with the starry lights have to do with feelings of love the way I speculate it to be,

It'd mean that this character genuinely loves and cares for Aqua as his child. He loved Ai too. It’s mutual—they both fell for each other at first sight. Realizing this made me feel a bit more at ease.

Even though the plot is progressing frustratingly, separate from that, I already know the final outcome although I can't predict all the little details.

Ai won’t regret loving him. Instead, the story will go, "Oh, he was worth loving after all."

And Huh, isn’t this an official couple though? They even had two kids together. But if you look at the fan art on Pixiv, there are only barely like 30 posts under their tag. Did I tag it wrong or something? Is there a different related tag?

Well, it’s good for me. I uploaded six out of those 30 posts. I wish I can draw better, I beat them before everyone else did!

I’m going to be right. Just wait and see.

I’m sure many of my interpretations will turn out to be right. I just hope it doesn’t drag on for too long, because it’s stressing me out. Seriously! It’s hard to read, and since I draw a lot of fan art, people keep sending me messages about how "Hikaru is crazy." (Yeah… I get it. I see how it can happen too...) I just want a conclusion on that. If I’m wrong, fine, but I’m telling you, till then, I’m right. Doesn't make sense, does it? but I just know that it's how it will turn out to be.

Oh, while we’re at it, let’s talk about AquaKana! I can’t say for sure that they’ll end up together as a cute couple, but there’s one thing I’m certain about.

Aqua will confess to Kana. That’s bound to happen. It’s so ridiculous that he kissed Akane and even let Ruby kiss him, but hasn’t done anything with the girl he actually likes… What is he even doing? Dude, at least your dad only had eyes for one person. (I wonder what Akane was talking about with that analysis about him having dated someone three years ago btw? What was that about? Did he make a deal with a goddess who became human like Tsukuyomi? I can’t imagine him with anyone other than Ai. But Aqua? Yeah, I can see it, he’s already done that. Ugh. Hikaru should really treat Ai well. She gave so much for him, really. He probably did and will, don't let her down, I'm watching. What are you going to do for her? There must have been a reason for 155? I really am speculating he wants to give his life for her because SOMEONE's trying to do something like that in the song and it should be touched sometime but if it isn't that, sure...I don't want him to die, but I also want the songs to be relevant)

So, I think Aqua owes Kana a kiss, at least. And he should call her by her name, too. Maybe they’re saving that for a big reveal at the end? After all, the author used to write romance stories. In most cases, the heroine at the end is the one the protagonist ends up with, and Kana’s storyline still has unresolved points.

This isn’t just me saying, "I love AquaKana, I want them to end up together!" It’s based on the narrative flow. They’ve likely been holding off on it to lead the story that way. Aqua’s a mess because of his dad, so he’s got no energy left to focus on anything else. This manga seriously makes my heart race right now, I feel like I can’t take it anymore. I need a break...

If Aqua ends up with someone, it’ll be Kana. It’s so obvious that I’m not even worried about it. I mentioned before that after seeing Aqua’s parents, looking at Aqua and Kana makes me feel so relieved because they’re so bright and cheerful by comparison. At least they aren't a couple where one side is being accused of having killed another. This makes me wonder just WHAT i've been reading lately.

That said, considering Kamiki’s misfortune and all the foreshadowing, I think something might happen at the concert, putting Kana in danger. Aqua will probably end up at her graduation concert, and I think he’ll witness her final stage. I’m not sure how the story will lead into that, but it seems like a natural progression, satisfying the plot and the audience.

[chaozsilhouette]

A Revealing Performance

My rendition for the Shadow Play in @winterpower98's Swap Au.

It was supposed to be a simple thing, then it sort of spiraled into this whole deal. For the effects of the Shadow Lantern, I drew some inspiration from her Cursed Au as I never thought simply using her friends was cruel enough for the Monkey Tyrant.

It serves to show just how far Macaque has grown, but also to highlight just how monstrous he was.

_____________________________

Mei refrained from downing her bubble tea as she waited for the play to start. It had been a rough couple of weeks with Spider Queen and that creepy girl. And failing to find where Xiaotian had run off to after the misunderstanding. When Macaque sent her tickets to the local theatre, she was ashamed to think it was a trap.

Pigsy and Sandy were right. After everything that happened, she needed some serious me time. She had been too stressed.

Besides, everyone knew Macaque was a total theatre nerd. Few people knew that the star puppeteer was actually the Six-Eared Macaque himself. He would totally send her tickets from his stomping grounds as a way to unwind.

It was a shame that Tang couldn’t join them. Apparently, he finally managed to schedule a meeting with the Celestial Realm and was Taking the demon brothers to figure out a new way of sealing the Monkey Tyrant. It was also his chance to explain their little break-in during New Years. He encouraged her to have fun and if it was good, he’d join them for the next showing.

So here they were waiting for the performance to start. Although she wondered what the fake mayor was doing here. They hadn't seen him since he gave her the skeleton key. Still wasn't sure why he had it or why he gave it to her? Supposedly she was only supposed to have it for a day, but he never stopped by to pick it up.

_____________________________

Sun Wukong was a monkey of many talents, but even he had to admit Macaque was a far better storyteller and his mastery of shadows was sheer perfection. But that just made this plan all the more perfect. What better way to teach his wayward beloved’s little flower a lesson than through a trusted medium.

Obtaining a spot in the local theatre was child’s play, a little magic and they were all but begging him to take center stage. Apparently, they had been scrambling to find a new performer after their star puppeteer had to leave for a family emergency (three guesses as to who that was). And with a little glamor, a set of tickets was left at the little flower's doorstep. As far as she knew, Macaque was proud of her progress and believed she had deserved a reward for all her hard work. She was so desperate for something to go right she hardly questioned how her mentor, who was in parts unknown, managed to secure tickets for a new performer.

In his personal dressing room, Wukong delicately touched up his human disguise. Even if he was going to be hidden in his hanfu and cloak, it wouldn’t do to spoil the surprise. Applying his eye shadow with artful flair, the Monkey King took time to appreciate just how handsome he truly was no matter what form he took. Honestly, who would have thought such perfection existed?

A pulse of dark magic drew his attention to his latest partner in crime.

The Shadow Lantern gently floated before him. Its dark magic practically purring at the thought of being used. Wukong could almost laugh at his beloved’s foolishness. He was there when his darling created the lantern, when he infused his own shadows into its very foundation. Did he honestly think such a masterpiece would tolerate being left to collect dust in a cave?

Normally a magical artifact would never consider turning on its master, but after centuries of abandonment, all Wukong had to do was whisper his intentions to return Macaque to his former self to secure its loyalty. The second he first made contact, he could sense a twisted hunger writhing within and with each performance granting it the chance to feed on the life essence of the viewers…. hehe, he almost couldn’t contain himself.

Looking up at the clock, he saw it was just about time for his next performance. His clones had reported the girl’s presence along with the pig and the water demon. Strangely the one with glasses and the little matchstick was absent. No matter, he could make do with two hostages just fine.

After all, the show must go on.

_____________________________

The overhead lights dimmed, signaling the start of the play. Smoke slowly poured from beneath the floorboards, generating an air of mystery. In a flash of golden light, a tall man wearing a beautiful cloak manifested on center stage. The crowd silenced themselves at the display.

“Welcome viewers to a performance you shall never forget!” From the folds of his sleeves, an exquisite lantern floated in front of him. A mesmerizing yet familiar purple glow emanating from the center.

“Our tale tonight is one of love, companionship, and how even the strongest of bonds can be severed through the trickery of the wicked.”

In the background, the shadows twisted and grew in the lantern’s light. Carefully they formed a beautiful scene of a mountain covered in flowers and trees. Attention was gradually guided to the top, where a round stone basked in the sun.

“It all began with the birth of a King.”

The round stone broke, revealing a figure that resembled a monkey. But no, this was a monkey demon, a monkie if you would. The King journeyed down the mountain until he found a tribe of normal monkeys. The group frolicked for a while as the King established himself as the undisputed ruler of the tribe.

A large figure with an ax appeared. The monster brought down his ax upon a small collection of monkeys only to be stopped at the last second by the King. The King used his superior strength to steal the demon’s ax and used it to decapitate the intruder in a single stroke. The monkeys jumped around the King and praised his strength, but the King did not appear satisfied.

“The young King was born with great power and strength, but he sought out more to protect his people.”

The King crafted a raft and set out on a dangerous sea. The King was shown to face off against mountain gods, human warriors, and demonic sorcerers always to reign victorious but never satisfied.

“In his travels, he learned much and faced many enemies, in time his efforts were handsomely rewarded.”

The King climbed a fleet of stairs carved into a mountain to reach a humble monastery. At the top, a stern human stood, but behind him was another monkie. This one however possessed six ears.

“His quest for power led him to a Warrior of potential equaling his own. At first, neither was sure how to react to their mirror, but they quickly forged a comradery that took them far.”

The two monkies trained together, mastering new powers as they sparred.

“Their time together increased their power exponentially and as they grew stronger their feelings blossomed into something beautiful.”

The two were on a cliff overlooking the stars, slowly leaning closer to one another. Eventually, the two faced their opposite and leaned in close.

“Their fates had become intertwined. Their power was unmatched. It was then the King realized what he had been searching for all this time.”

The two shadows merged together in a complex dance until they separated into two beings once again, but not as they began. The two monkeys were now garbed in elaborate, yet practical armor and silks. The King wielded a staff and the Warrior took up a spear.

“Slowly their strength grew to where nothing could challenge them, whether in the Celestial Realm or on Earth.”

The King and Warrior were shown battling heavenly armies and powerful demons with confident smirks. Each battle resoundingly won through their combination of speed, strength, and cunning.

“But it was not enough. The King wished to ensure that he and the Warrior would be able to fight together forever and sought the power and respect needed to secure their future.”

The King took to the Heavens, where he stood before an Emperor in the most extravagant outfit, surrounded by massive guards in magical armor. The Emperor was clearly afraid as the King effortlessly toppled one guard after another, slowly approaching the throne at a steady pace.

“The King’s noble actions were viewed negatively by those who feared his ever-growing power. Eventually, a prison was crafted that could restrain the King, one that not even his beloved Warrior could destroy.”

Just before the King’s latest attack could reach the Emperor, chains wrapped around his limbs and dragged him down to Earth. With a quick flex, the chains shattered, but the King was doomed as a mountain landed on him with a seal placed at the top. The Warrior tried to pry off the seal or find some way to weaken the mountain, his acts growing more desperate with time, yet nothing worked.

“Cruelly, the King was forced to wait until he could be freed, forced to watch his precious Warrior defend their Kingdom on his own.”

With a heavy expression, the Warrior abandoned his efforts to return to the original mountain as dozens of terrifying figures surrounded the monkey inhabitants.

“Centuries passed and their love still burned strong. Soon their patience was rewarded, the King was freed but he was soon trapped in a new prison.”

A monk approached the mountain and removed the seal. The King swiftly destroyed the mountain. The monk humbly bowed to the King and offered fresh clothing and a fillet. The King garbed himself in the gifts only to collapse in agony when the monk prayed.

“Enraged the King played along until the time was right. The King and the Warrior reunited in secret and crafted a plan that would allow them to take their revenge on those that dared to separate them.”

The two monkies hugged and nuzzled each other in appreciation. A quick conversation later, the Warrior changed to resemble the King and joined the monk as the King headed into unknown lands.

“Decades later the King was ready to retrieve his love, confident in his regained strength. But when he arrived the Warrior had changed. It was as if the warrior had lost a crucial part of himself. The Warrior tried to dissuade the King from killing the monk and his companions. He even tried to convince him to give up his rage at the Celestial Realm, believing the war that would ensue wasn't worth it.”

The disguised Warrior was traveling with four colorful characters. The King dropped from the sky in front of the group, a massive crater forming around him. The Warrior regained his true form, but instead of returning to his rightful place, he blocked the King’s view of the monk.

“The King could not believe his ears. This could not be his Warrior. His love always understood his goals and knew why heaven had to pay. The King knew this change was the monk’s fault. The King moved to silence the deceiver in one quick strike only to find it blocked by the Warrior.”

The King and Warrior exchanged blows that tore mountains asunder, split the heavens, and burned down forests. The other demons following the monk tried to aid the warrior, but nothing they did seemed to slow down the King, if anything their attacks only served to further enrage him.

“The two clashed until the Warrior fled with the jailers. Time and time again they clashed, but never could the King reach the Warrior he held in his heart.”

The group fled from the battle, but time and time again the King tracked them down. The locations may have changed, but the carnage after each battle remained as world-shattering as the first. In the end, the Group managed to truly escape, and the Warrior vanished into the shadows he wielded, leaving the King alone with nothing but his memories.

“Even now the King yearns for the companionship of his beloved Warrior, knowing that at his core the Warrior craves the same.”

With the final line sending shivers down the spines of the viewers, the puppeteer vanished in a flash of light.

_____________________________

As Mei waited for her family to walk out, she couldn’t help but think about the play. It almost sounded like they were telling the tale of the Monkey King. But that was ridiculous. No one knew the Monkey King’s origins aside from minor details from the Journey to the West. Besides the narrator seemed to view the Monkey Tryant as a hero and victim. Clearly, that guy needed a reality check.

“Hello, young one.” Nearly choking on the remainder of her tea, Mei turned to see the puppeteer standing behind her with a knowing smile.

His cloak shrouding the top of his face in shadow. For a second, Mei envisioned her father Macaque. He would adore that look. Actually, didn’t she see a similar outfit in his closet on Flower Fruit Mountain? Doesn’t he wear that outfit when he’s hosting a shadow play?

Wait. How did he sneak up on her like that? Was she that out of it?

How long has she been quiet? Crap! Say something! “Oh. Ah-hello. C-can I help you with something?”

“I was about to ask the same. You do know the theatre is going to close soon right?”

“What?” Mei grabbed her phone. The digital clock flashed that it was past nine. That couldn’t be right. That meant she had been waiting for nearly an hour. But where were the others? Surely, they wouldn’t have left without telling her. Were they in trouble?

“Is everything alright?”

“Ah- yeah, everything’s fine.” It’s cool. It’s cool. She could handle this. She just needed to stay calm. “No need to worry about me. I just ah-I have a few questions about your play.”

“Yes.”

“How did you could up with the concept? I mean, no offense, but your premise could be taken the wrong way.” Maybe it was the panic over where her family had disappeared to, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was being sized up.

“Hm. Have you ever heard the expression ‘History is written by the winners’?”

“Yes. It’s pretty common.” Like one of the most used sayings in the world.

“The tale was designed to show that love is one of the most cherished feelings of all and that in order to protect it, one must be willing to do anything to keep their loved ones safe. The King only wished to keep his beloved by his side, but the Warrior was misled and forced to battle against his love. That story may belong to only two, but similar tales can be experienced in anyone’s life. Tell me, can you think of a time you fought with those you cared about due to a misunderstanding?”

Without even considering it, horrible memories resurfaced. Mei arguing with MK as she tried to stop him from leaving with the newly released Monkey King. Mei forced to battle Red Son as his mind was slowly consumed by the True Fire of Samadhi. Tang lying to them about his true identity. Macaque leaving when they needed him most without saying why.

“I see you can.” The puppeteer gently guided her back into the main hall, where she took a seat on an empty bench.

“It’s nothing. I just-” She honestly didn’t know why she was pouring out her heart to stranger. Maybe she really was that exhausted. “-there’s so much going on and I’m supposed to be strong no matter what. But sometimes it hurts, just thinking about all my mistakes. Sometimes I wonder if I truly am strong. What if bringing me into this was a mistake?”

“What if it was?” That voice!

Mei turned to see Macaque garbed in a strange outfit, one that honestly reminded her of the Monkey King’s. She was confused. She had never seen him wear anything like that, he looked like the Monkey King’s twisted shadow.

And that expression! Her father Macaque had never made that face before. It looked as though he was reveling in her suffering.

“What’s the matter, little jade? Don’t worry, I won’t leave you alone.” He extended a hand slowly with the intent to cradle her face. A normal gesture he would use to comfort her, but her every instinct was screaming at her to get away.

Mei jumped to her feet and pulled out her spear, aiming it right between the imposter’s eyes. “Enough games!”

Macaque stared at the spear for a second, his fiendish expression only growing more vicious. He threw his head back with a full-bodied laugh, showing how little he thought of her threat. “Ha. Ha. Ha.”

In a flash of light, the Monkey Tyrant was standing before her, still wearing his puppeteer disguise. “Wow. About time. For a while, I was wondering if you’d ever figure out it was me.” His red and gold eyes carefully roved over her body, taking in every shake and fearful twitch. “Put down the spear, kid. We both know you’re not nearly good enough to scratch me with such a pitiful copy of the Dragon Blade.”

That may have been true, but she’d sooner make out with DBP in full view of Queen Iron Fan than leave herself completely open before this tyrant. “So the play was from your perspective. I always figured you were delusional, but this is a new low. Where is my family?” She all but growled, unknowingly her canines had slightly elongated in response to her rage.

“They never left. I’m surprised you didn’t recognize this.” The Monkey King took out the lantern, once more bathing the room in that familiar glow.

“What’s the big deal about a lantern?”

The stone monkie found her ignorance all the more entertaining. To think he hadn’t warned her of his own past.

“The big deal is that my dear warrior crafted this lantern long ago. It was his finest work and like everything he made it has multiple uses.” With a simple hand gesture, the silhouettes of Pigsy and Sandy appeared on the walls. “The Shadow Lantern can do more than enhance one’s skills in shadow magic, it can trap the bodies and souls of its targets. So long as the targets are trapped, the lantern can steal the shadows of its victims so its master can use them as a personal army until there is nothing left.”

“You expect me to believe Macaque made something so disgusting?” Even as Mei said it, she couldn’t help but recognize how similar the lantern’s magic was to her teacher’s. It was cool and soothing, but on the edge, there was an unmistakable edge of malice. “Even if he did, I doubt he made it without you whispering in his ears.”

“Oh child, you have no idea how many secrets he keeps from you. Let me share one with you.” The lantern grew brighter, and the silhouettes of her family members gained more substance as they peeled away from the walls.

Mei adjusted herself so all opponents were in her sight, but nothing could stop the sweat collecting on her forehead.

She sensed something powerful appear behind her. Jumping out of the way as a spear nearly severed her arm. She faced her new opponent. Only to almost drop her weapon.

Standing before her was another copy of Macaque only this one was even more disturbing. Its eyes burned with purple light, the shadows loving curled around it, but worst of all was the sneer filled with razor-tipped teeth.

“Did you honestly think my love was always so nice?”

[youryanderedaddy]

Sorry to bother you! That yandere brat piece was very good! I was wondering if in the future you would be interested in creating a part two? Again, wonderful work, have a nice day!

Tw: slight nsfw, obsessive/possessive behavior, abuse of authority, non - consensual touching, implied non - con

Two months had passed since Gabrielle manipulated you into dating him and as much as you hated the entitled snob, being his girlfriend had its perks. People seemed to show more respect towards you, maybe even fear, knowing that you had managed to tame one of the most dangerous bullies on the campus. And of course you always got what you wanted with as much as one look, be it clothes, jewelry, makeup or someone’s quick and painless murder. Some of the girls envied you for catching the eye of the rich, handsome heir, most of them wished you’d be gone so they could stand a chance with the blonde.

They were so foolish in the way they believed you were genuinely happy with your “lover” and as dreamy as your situation looked to the others, the cold reality was much more sinister. You hated seeing the awe in your colleagues’ eyes every time you passed in the hall with Gabrielle’s hand wrapped around your waist. You despised his stupid little gifts and public acts of affection, it felt shiny, fussy and most of all fake. But what had caused you the most heartbreak was the look on your best friend’s face once he realized you had chosen the enemy that had tormented him for months. Still, it didn’t matter, it shouldn’t have, you couldn’t approach him anyways with your loving, doting boyfriend following your every move closely.

You had tried to get some help early on while you still had hope that you could get away from the obsessive man. You had spoken to the principle, opening up about the events from the past few months, told him all about the party incident, the constant harassment and stalking, all up to the point when the blonde had threatened you into staying with him. In that moments there were tears glistering in your eyes and you were shaking during the whole conversation yet you managed to spit out the bitter words stuck at the back of your throat like a hard, heavy stone. On top of reliving the nightmare once again trough your memories, you were met with silence. With fear. The principle was not only a coward kissing up to Gabrielle’s father, but also a snitch. That night your boyfriend took you for the first time.

It was the middle of the night when his cold piercing voice woke you up from your deep peaceful slumber. The only time you caught a break from the blonde was in your sleep and now he wanted to take this away from you too. You felt the man’s weight on your body and opened your mouth in a desperate attempt to shout but his palm quickly covered it, successfully turning your screams into muffled whimpers. You lifted your head to look at him pleadingly, silently asking to be spared, but his gaze fixed upon your squirming frame was so stern and intense it almost forced you still. You hadn’t seen the male so angry since the night he cornered you against the wall and confessed his feelings.

“You are so fucking naive, bunny.” Gabrielle growled in your ear, your back breaking in cold sweat. In the next moment his lips were trailing the sensitive feverish skin of your neck, his teeth digging into the flesh until the drops of fresh blood dripped down your collarbone. “Such a silly little girl.” He whispered in a deep patronizing voice, a note too condescending to sound caring or sweet. His warm breath was hitting your abused spots, love bites and hickeys, his tongue wet and hot over the nasty possessive marks. ”You really thought that the principle wouldn’t tell me about the pathetic little stunt you have pulled this morning.” The male continued, his heavy gaze pinning you further into the soft mattress. You wanted to defend yourself or maybe even try to talk your way out but the blonde suddenly pushed two of his fingers down your throat causing you to gag. “I don’t want to hear your excuses so save your breath.” Gabrielle spat out with venom and pulled his digits out of your mouth wiping the saliva on your flimsy white t-shirt. The heir stared at you from above, his face pale and hesitant. He was thinking about something.

“I wanted to be gentle with you.” The man admitted softly yet huskily as he reached out to stroke your tear – stained cheek. “I really don’t enjoy seeing you so scared of me. It doesn’t suit you.” The snob sighed in frustration, obviously conflicted by two different feelings, and narrowed his eyes. “But you proved yourself incapable of making decisions on your own.” Part of him wanted to break you completely and the other wished to hold you close and cherish you forever. Unfortunately for you, at the end the evil prevailed and his gaze hardened, his blue eyes dark and chaotic, cruel in the way they resembled a thunderstorm a lot more than a clear sky. “The moment I leave you alone, you try to run away from me like a frightened little rabbit.” The male muttered under his breath, the pitiful expression of heartbreak written all over his pretty face. You couldn’t help but brace yourself for what was to come because despite not knowing what it was, your gut feeling was eating at you, the panic suffocating you. “I am going to make you mine tonight.” The blonde finally stated in an eerie monotone tone, devoid of any emotion other than empty desperate anger, the type of rage you experience only when you desire something you can never truly get.

Gabrielle easily slipped his cold hand under your t-shirt and cupped your breast, smiling at the warmth radiating from your soft skin. He circled your areola and gently teased your nipple until it stood at attention. You wanted to force his prying hand away from your chest but the shock was too paralyzing to leave enough room for any courage. After all Gabrielle had never gotten this far before. “P-please stop! I’m sorry for what I did, I will never do it again, I promise.” You begged the man who had taken your freedom to spare the only thing that still fully belonged to you – your innocence. The bully simply chuckled in response and caressed your hair in a fruitless attempt at comfort. Perhaps the man didn’t realize his touch could never be comforting to you, but he couldn’t help himself when you looked so cute and repentant in your meaningless struggles. “Darling, this isn’t meant to be a punishment.” The blonde looked you straight in the eyes, a sly teasing smile on his full red lips. “This is me showing you exactly who you belong to.” The hungry kiss that followed after burnt your tongue more than any of the poisonous words you wanted to spill.

You weren’t sure whether your heart or your body was bleeding out more. At the end it didn’t really matter as neither were yours to control. Not anymore.

[starks-hero]

The Right One

Pairing: Sherlock x Reader

Summary: Sherlock's previous experiences with love left a few cracks. But you're more than happy to help mend them.

Word Count: 1,332

Warnings: None really, some mentions of bad past experiences

It's funny how simple little things can stick in a person's mind for so long. How one small event can change their perception of so much.

This was the case when it came to Sherlock, specifically his interest in a romantic partner. Holmes always found it easier to act as though he found such things trivial, that the idea of a relationship was completely unappealing to him.

But truth be told, that wasn't really the case. Sherlock wasn't repelled by the idea of a girlfriend, or a boyfriend for that matter. If anything, he found the whole concept rather interesting. From observing his parents as a child to seeing John with Mary, Sherlock found love fascinating in its complexity.

But any spark or willingness to take the leap and grow close enough to someone to explore such a relationship had been swiftly stomped out by them.

He had been sixteen when he met the first. He was young and as carefree as he was ever going to be in his life. She had been a family friend and attended the same school as him, which meant there was practically no way Sherlock could avoid her. At first, he disliked her. He didn't understand why she took it personally. He disliked everyone at that point.

But gradually, he found that he enjoyed being around her. Or rather, he enjoyed the way she made him feel. Through his teen years, any and all attention Sherlock received from his peers was entirely negative. He was the freak, the know it all.

But not to her. To her, he was fascinating, intelligent, brilliant. And Sherlock loved it. He thrived on it. Before long it was an obsession, an addiction.

Which, of course, made it all the more painful when the truth came out. Getting close to the freak Holmes brother had earned her twenty pounds from each of her classmates, and thought Sherlock a valuable lesson.

He should have known that anyone willing to take such an interest in him was simply doing it for their own gain. The relationship he'd just begun to open his heart to turned out to be nothing more than a practical joke with his own heartbreak serving as the punchline.

He swore after that he'd never make the same mistake. However, attempting to cage one's own heart is a dangerous task. And as to be expected, it didn't remain locked away for all that long.

The day Irene Adler waltzed into his life, Sherlock's heart began to pull at the bars of its confinement. Not in a wild frenzy of love, or desperately out of lust. More so out of curiosity.

She cared, in a strange sort of way. She found him interesting. And though her constant advances did little good in seducing the detective, he couldn't ignore the growing feeling of being wanted again that was steadily expanding inside of him. The feeling of being appealing, being desired. It was intoxicating, but it wasn't love. And Sherlock firmly reminded himself of that fact. He recalled what happened last time and knew Irene was no different.

Sherlock couldn't really say much when it came to Jeannine. He had lied, manipulated and used her simply to further his grasp on a case. It was cruel, even by his standards. So when he found out Jeannine had played him the same way he had played her, he was amused, but beneath that, a part of him was disappointed. He may even go as far as saying upset.

He didn't blame Jeannie, of course, but knowing that once again, he was only found interesting for the rewards others could reap from him came as a painful reminder. It opened up old wounds that Sherlock was beginning to doubt would ever scar over.

Experiment after experiment. Test after test. A variety of different variables and yet the result was always the same. Sherlock had all the proof he needed to conclude that love was dangerous, foolish and unnecessary. It was a chemical disadvantage. He also concluded that he was the root of the problem.

But then there was you.

You stumbled into Sherlock's life completely unexpectedly and at that time, Sherlock was oblivious as to just how much you'd grow to mean to him. It started gradually. Sherlock's general disliking for people seemed to diminish when it came to you and he even found himself enjoying your company. He absentmindedly smiled when you spoke, made a habit of standing unnecessarily close and attempted to impress you whenever the opportunity presented itself, something John seldom let him forget.

To put it in simpler terms, Sherlock Holmes was absolutely smitten. He just hadn't realized it yet. The way you made him feel, the severity of the emotions he experienced because of you, there was no high that could achieve anything like it. The wonderful feeling of being wanted had returned.

Sherlock adored you, in every sense of the word.

However, when he realized what these feelings indicated, Sherlock struggled to contain his fear. He distanced himself from you before you could do it to him. He had been hurt before and survived. But he wasn't sure he could manage suffering through that emotional torment again, especially if it was at your hands.

This didn't go unnoticed. As ever vigilant as Sherlock was, his greatest downfall was his obliviousness to what was standing right in front of him. Had Sherlock not spent so much time trying to get you to like him, he probably would have noticed that you already did.

In fact, you were absolutely infatuated with him. And everyone knew. John knew, Molly knew, Lestrade knew. Donovan, Anderson and everyone at the Yard knew. Everyone but Sherlock. When he did start to withdraw from you, you figured it was now or never.

But for each step you took forward, Sherlock took two back. At first, you thought it was out of disinterest, that you had misread the entire situation and this was Sherlock's attempt at a wordless rejection. But you soon learned that was not the case.

Sherlock's behaviour did not come from a place of resentment, but rather a place of fear. Now that you'd figured it out, you were shocked you'd never seen it before. Sherlock had been broken. Scars lined his heart and he wasn't prepared to give anyone the power to hurt him like that again.

So, that's what you decided you'd show him. That he didn't have to be afraid, that you would never hurt him and that, with time, the scars would fade.

At first, Sherlock resembled a skittish deer, racing off at the first sign of affection. It was hard work, but then again, everything was hard work with Sherlock. You didn't so much as ‘dance around each other’ as you did helplessly stumble and fall at each other's feet; like two love struck teens experiencing love for the first time. 

You let him come to you. And with time he did. Bit by bit, step by step, until you both met in the middle. It took a long time, but it couldn't have been more worth it in the end.

Sherlock changed once you started dating. He was a little less cold, a little less out of tune. He didn't see the world through rose-tinted glasses by any means, but everything did seem that bit brighter.

The insecurity was still there. The fear that he was being used, that he was disposable. It’s not the kind of thing that can be completely loved away after all. But with each soft touch, each kiss, each compliment, each simple yet genuine display of love and affection, the insecurities lessened and the feeling of contentment grew.

And the day he first heard you mutter those three simple words with full confidence, the scars on his heart faded ever so slightly, and he allowed himself to start healing.

Because you loved him, and slowly Sherlock was learning to love you too.

~~~~~~

Forever tag list: @miraclesoflove @bakerstreethound @Kealohilani-tepise

Sherlock tag list: @fanfictionsilove @quentawewe @andreasworlsboring101 @doozywoozy @the-worst-critic @starrykitn @the-queer-dungeoneer​ @xxvisiblexx @Xhz17x @Jellyfishbeansontoast

[court-of-forever-undone]

My Sister’s Love | Taryn POV

Chapter Three

Summary: Taryn pieces together her memories of Cardan and Jude’s early interactions as she reflects on how their relationship came to be and the events of the last year. As happy as she is for them, she can’t help but feel jealous of the moments they share.

Tags: Taryn’s POV of Jude x Cardan, Final Part

Read on AO3

After that dinner, we found Jude awake in her old rooms sitting with Tatterfell and Oak. For a moment, it was easy to pretend nothing had happened. She wore one of the black gowns she favored since becoming seneschal and was eating from a tray in front of her. But as she turned to face us, the wince she failed to hide and the paleness of her skin were reminders that she had nearly died just days ago. Her hair had been braided to mimic a crown, which was another reminder that my sister was not the same twin I had known.

Before we had a chance to talk, Cardan appeared. He likely came straight from his rooms, after finding them empty. Every fiber of my being wanted to grab Jude’s arm when Cardan asked her to join him, but I saw the dusting of pink spread across her cheeks as she saw him in the doorway, so I stood there silently. Jude would have probably ignored any word of caution coming from me anyways. We still had yet to fully come to terms with everything that happened between us.

When it had been hours and Jude had yet to return, I went to the royal chambers to see if she had gone straight there, but instead, I found Garrett.

While Jude had at least recovered some from her near-death experience, Garrett looked like the ghost of the beautiful sandy-haired boy I had met before. It might have been a funny observation given his code name, but all humor was lost in the moment. He had lost weight and his face had sunken in. When our eyes met, I saw the plea in them before he opened his mouth.

The next few hours were a blur. When Jude finally arrived at Hollow Hall, I was surprised to see she had allowed Cardan to come along. Cardan had proved he would follow my sister into the heart of an enemy war camp, despite better judgment, but this time Jude had chosen to invite him along with her.

After I commanded Garrett to stop, cursing myself for not thinking to do it earlier, we moved to a parlor room and I explained how we had come to know each other through Locke’s carelessness.

We discussed the events of what Garrett had done at Locke and Madoc’s command. It turned out that Garrett had been the one to shoot Queen Orglah. Even if he had been commanded to do it, Nicasia and the seafolk would see him as a traitor and demand that he be punished, which meant his life was entirely at the mercy of Jude and Cardan. I couldn’t help but see the resemblance to my own situation.

When Cardan made a comment about me lurking around the palace, I revealed that I had no intention of going anywhere until I knew that Jude would be safe. Our relationship may be strained, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t make up for my actions.

Cardan wore an expression that showed he was tired of this conversation. “Jude and I had a misunderstanding. But we’re not enemies. And I am not your enemy, either, Taryn.”

As a faerie, I knew he couldn’t lie, but that didn’t matter. Maybe he didn’t think of us as enemies, he could still think of us as toys.

“But you think everything’s a game. You and Locke.” His name tasted like ash in my mouth.

“Unlike Locke, I never thought love was a game. You may accuse me of much, but not that.” Cardan shared softly.

The air in the room shifted as Cardan's gaze fell upon Jude, who refused to even look in his direction before quickly changing the subject.

For the first time, it was not just me who was drawing a comparison between our loves. While Cardan’s words came out more as a confession to Jude than a taunt at me, the words still stung. Locke had thought love to be a game. But Cardan, the cruel, spoiled prince did not think love was a game.

How had I believed Locke was my future?

In the carriage back to the palace, Cardan broke the silence by asking about some of the things he had seen on his way to Vivi’s apartment. Most of his questions were about the dishwasher which had been running in the apartment, how mortal mailboxes worked, how secure they were in protecting incoming mail, and what slushies tasted like.

By the end of the ride, I couldn’t help but laugh at his questions which seemed so trivial given the circumstances we all found ourselves in. When we were alone I turned to Jude, who was barely awake on her feet.

“Do you trust him?” I asked. It was the question that had been gnawing at me since our return.

Jude thought for a moment before sighing. “Sometimes,” she responded.

It was enough to make me warn her. Did I think Cardan loved her? Yes. But was Cardan trustworthy? It was hard to forget the years of our childhood together that suggested otherwise and if Jude who had gotten to know him closer than any of the rest of us questioned it, then it was probably best not to.

I had been blinded by my love for Locke that I trusted him to take care of me. I didn’t want the same to happen to Jude, even if seeing them care for each other made my heart ache with envy.

____________________________________________________________

In the days leading up to Madoc’s arrival, all of Elfhame seemed to be on alert; waiting for something to happen. Whispers that bordered on treason could be heard on the grounds and it seemed that everyone had begun placing bets on the outcome of the meeting. It seemed that many of the Folk had questions around the legitimacy of a human queen and the chance the High King’s army stood against a Redcap led army.

Madoc would stop at nothing to get what he wanted. Vivi, Jude, and I all knew that. I did not have to attend strategy meetings to know they were facing a serious threat.

Amidst the preparations for possible battle, the whole castle seemed to note the change in the High King and Queen’s dynamic. For one, their marriage was now common knowledge, but more than that there was a closeness between them that had never been there before.

At first, it was not-so-secret handholding and shared looks at mealtimes. Once at dinner, Cardan made a joke about the dangers of in-laws and Jude rolled her eyes before letting a real smile show.

Then, rumors began to spread that a servant had walked into the royal chambers to replace the bedding and apparently caught the two in a compromising position even though they were supposed to be in a war meeting.

I was doubtful when I first heard, but I even overheard some council members complaining about how they missed when the two bickered all meetings instead of ditching meetings to sneak off together.

The new development had only lasted a matter of days, so I hadn’t figured out if it stemmed from a need for distraction given the impending situation or if the two had formed a more intimate relationship since Jude’s return to health.

The look of devastation on Jude’s face after Cardan transformed suggested that whatever their relationship entailed, Jude had begun to share feelings for him that went beyond hate or tolerance.

When Cardan snapped the blood crown, the air turned stale and the ground hardened. I couldn’t tear my eyes off of Cardan, as his body seemed to melt and twist into the monstrous snake.

The ground shook as the snake moved through the room headed straight for the sword maker. By the time Grimsen was swallowed, I was being pushed deeper into the castle by the flow of the crowd desperate to get to safety. I only got a glimpse of the horror on Jude’s face before she was completely out of sight.

By the time I finally saw her later, I saw the tear stains on her cheeks and the exhaustion behind her eyes. I wondered if she was mourning Cardan or perhaps she was coming to terms with her own future. If Cardan could not be saved, Jude would likely not last long on the throne. The lower courts might seize the chance or the undersea would. That is if our father didn’t dethrone her first.

For the first time in months, I thought I might be able to understand her again. Like me, her husband gave her a level of security that was uncommon for a human in Faerie. While Jude may try to say her motivations for marrying Cardan were different from me marrying Locke, I don’t think they were. They were both motivated by power and protection.

I married Locke for protection in Elfhame. My position as his wife also gave me a degree of power I never had before. Jude married Cardan to become High Queen. She could have become the most powerful knight alive and still not have been afforded the same level of protection she has as Cardan’s queen. While we may have had different expectations for our marriages, both were strategic.

Madoc taught us that it is harder to hold onto power than it is to gain it. It is even harder to hold on when it is just you. Together, she and Cardan had a chance at maintaining the throne, but alone the chances were slim.

I may have lost almost every privilege I had as Locke’s wife, but Jude had a lot more to lose without Cardan; including her life.

In his absence, the happiness that Jude showed disappeared entirely. When she wasn’t in meetings, she could be found in the destroyed throne room and truly seemed to mourn him.

I recognized some of her pain, though her situation was different of course. I knew what it was like to feel the suffocating sense of loneliness. After all, I had gone months without hearing from my sisters or my parents, all while stuck in a relationship that was on tilted ground from the start.

I knew the pain of losing a partner. Locke died by my hand, but it did not stop the mixed emotions that came after. In the instant I decided to act, I lost any promise of a safe future in Elfhame.

We both knew what it was like to be humans in Faerieland; powerless to watch as the monsters closed in from all sides. In a land where the food, wine, a dance, and a simple conversation could be disastrous, only she and I could truly understand the deep fear that every day brought.

When the day came to bridle the snake, my sister looked magnificent, powerful even. She looked every bit the part of High Queen. But behind her cold, fierce look, I noted the inner turmoil that plagued her.

No one had any ideas on how to save the High King. Therefore, her future came down to if she would decide to wield the snake as a weapon or not. With the serpent, Jude would have had a chance to hold her position on the throne. Without Cardan, she would likely lose everything.

If power was the only thing she wanted, it would have been a simple choice. Jude would have found the snake and ruled as the murderous queen that some fae refer to her as, for as long as she could. She hesitated though. After she dressed in Mab’s armor, she paced back and forth while she chewed her bottom lip, as she does when she is nervous or thinking. She didn’t know what she was going to do.

It was that morning that it became obvious that my sister had loved Cardan back. It was more than lust or a political arrangement. They both could claim their marriage had been strategic, and it might have started that way, but there was love between them. A love that kept her from using Cardan as a weapon.

They played their games and hurt one another, but when the other was in danger they shared the same look of desperate determination to save them. The look on Jude’s face was the same as Cardan’s when he came to Vivi’s apartment; desperate, sad, and determined.

____________________________________________________________

When Jude returned with a naked, bloody, Cardan I could not believe it. The impossible had happened.

Within a matter of hours, the palace managed to throw a feast in honor of the High King returning. I dressed quickly and made my way to join in the celebration with my siblings and Heather. Tatterfell told us that Jude would join us shortly.

At the height of the party, I spotted a familiar face trying to keep out of sight near the edge of the room. I left my spot near the musicians table and made my way towards him.

“Hello Garrett,” I said as I stopped next to him, taking in the room from his angle. Vivi, Heather, and Oak were still eating at one of the long tables. The crowd parted suddenly, so it was easy to spot Jude and Cardan as they made their way to the dancefloor.

“Taryn,” he replied with a smile.

Neither of us spoke for a moment as the kitchen servants brought out more desserts with a level of fanfare that matched the king that was being celebrated.

“Are you on king and queen duty this evening?” I asked with a nod to the direction of the dance floor.

Garrett shook his head and laughed, “Technically, I am always responsible for their safety, but I sense that the king and queen don’t wish to be followed.”

I looked back only to notice Cardan leading Jude behind the dais and out of sight.

“Then, perhaps you would like to dance?” The words slipped out before I could reason why it was a silly idea. Before I could regret my words, he offered a soft smile before extending his hand.

I let him sweep me onto the dance floor, trusting him to stop me before my feet wear out. I don’t know if it was the way his face lit up when he laughed, or because he is a member of my sister’s court of spies, or because I could command him at any time (not that I ever intend on using his name), but as we twirled and laughed together, I felt safe.

The feeling was a bit ridiculous. My future was still entirely unknown. I had a baby growing inside me, still needed to stand trial, and had no way to support myself.

Technically, both Garrett and I had committed crimes punishable by death, but at least for the evening, I was happy to share the space with him.

We stayed on the dance floor together until the sun streaked in through the windows.

____________________________________________________________

On the day of the tribunal, I could not help but tremble slightly. Cardan’s promise floated in my head, but I would never fully believe it until I was officially declared innocent. I could not believe that Jude would punish me too harshly. After all, she hated Locke for what he did, so I couldn’t imagine she was upset by my actions. At the same time, she also hated me for what I did, so it was hard to guess her thoughts.

I took my time getting ready until it was finally time to make my way to the throne room. I quietly entered and found my spot in the crowd before glancing up at the dais.

Together they sat. Two enemies who had somehow fallen in love. They had risen together through everything that had happened.

Jude made Cardan into a respectable king and Cardan made Jude queen so no one could overlook her power again.

Cardan invited me forward and in a clear voice, he granted me everything he promised. I was innocent and my child and I would inherit Locke’s titles.

I walked back to my seat and felt the weight of the last few months fall off of my shoulders.

With the ruling, I let myself imagine my future; something I had not done since the night I drove the letter opener plunge into Locke’s neck.

I had made regrettable choices in the past, but I had been given a fresh start.

I had hated the way my sisters had loving relationships, but now it was what I hope to find for myself.

I want a love that is more than security or protection or fun. I want to be with someone who encourages me to be more.

I am not in a rush to find love again. I have my child to raise, my relationships to repair, but if my sister’s love taught me anything, it is that love can happen in the most unlikely of places with the most unlikely of people.

[theundergroundstories]

OBEY!

Life had been particularly cruel to you. You grew up with an abusive dad, was bullied all throughout high school because of your small frail body, lost your best friend in a car accident and just recently had an intense argument with your boyfriend.

Your boyfriend, Derek, was a real piece of shit. He’s your classic alpha male. Tall, buff, handsome, arrogant, self absorbed, dominate, quick to loose his temper and has a large package. He has everything but a heart. That’s the reason you guys fought. He didn’t care about how your friend passed away. All he cared about was dominating you during sex.

The two of you have been giving each other the silent treatment for the past 2 days. You’re about to get dressed for work when you notice a flat cap with the word OBEY on it that doesn’t belong to you or Derek. You pick it up and found a note attached to it. The note claims that the first person to see the wearer of the cap will be forced to obey any and all commands the wearer gives them.

All logic within your brain is telling you that the cap is some bullshit prank Derek is pulling on you but you have a strange urge to put it on and try it on. The cap was a few sizes too big but you didn’t have time to fix it as Derek entered room.

“Where did you get that cap? Asked Derek.

You ignored him and began putting on my jeans.

“So this is how we’re going to play this? Still giving me the silent treatment? Bitch.” He said as he pushed me back onto the bed.

“You know what. You’re a dick Derek. I’ll admit you’re amazing in bed but you’re a word class asshole and I can’t do this anymore. We’re done. I’m breaking up with you! You grab the rest of your clothes and start to head out the door when you hear Derek shout.

“You’re the worthless one. You really think anyone wants your pathetic ass? I’m doing charity work by being your boyfriend!”

That’s when you snapped.

“You! You act all high and mighty and maybe you’re right. Maybe I am pathetic  but you need to face the truth that you are more pathetic than me! Underneath the muscles and gorgeous face, you’re nothing but a little kid desperately screaming for attention!” You yelled back.

“So this is what you’ve been upset about. You’re jealous of my body. The body of a real man. You could’ve just said so. I know I’m the perfect specimen.” Derek teased.

“How can you be so infuriating? My friend just died. I’m grieving! The fact that I would love to have a body like yours is not the issue!” You proclaim.

“So you do want my body! I can’t blame you it is the perfect body.” Derek taunted.

“Just shut up!! You don’t deserve your body! You insult other people because you’re the one who is inferior!” You retorted.

A moment of silences passes by.

“What no snarky comeback! No I’m perfect and everyone else lives to serve me?” You mocked

Another moment of silence passes and I turn to face Derek.

“Well say something!” I yelled with a new found confidence. Just a day ago you’ve never been able to stand up to Derek like you just did but something felt different.

“How did you do that? I wanted to speak but was unable to.” Derek asked with confusion.

You looked at him with a mix of confusion and awe. “You really couldn’t speak?”

“No I couldn’t. What is it that you’re not telling me you little bit…”

“Shut up” You interrupted him and just like that Derek stopped talking mid sentence.

“The hat fucking works.” You mumbled to yourself realizing the power you now hold over Derek.

“From now on you’re going to OBEY my every order. You got that.”

At first Derek just stares at me in awe of the power you now possess. After a few seconds of processing what you just said Derek nods his head and says “yes sir”.

“You’re going to fuck me right and pump all your DNA into me. We’re going to transform into each other because you’re a filthy piece of shit who doesn’t deserve the alpha body you have been given!”

“Yes sir!” Derek said as he undressed himself as quickly as he could.

He then grabbed me and pushed me to the wall. You quickly stripped out of my jeans and underwear leaving you completely naked aside from the cap.

Derek then inserted his 10 inch cock into your ass and began to slowly thrust it. As his dick was repeatedly penetrating your ass you could feel his DNA entering your body.

Your heights was the first thing to change. You felt yourself shoot upwards as you grew to 6 foot 6 inches and Derek shrunk down to a measly 5 foot 5 inches.

Seeing as Derek is now struggling to reach your ass, you decided to drop to your knees so that he could continue his work.

As soon as Derek was in you again his paced quicken and became more forceful. As you tried to hold in a moan you began to feel a warm tingling sensation spreading throughout your body. Your head and face begins to change as it grows in size to fill the cap. Your jawline becomes more prominent and the fat in your face disappears, leaving your face chiseled to perfection. Soon muscles erupted all over your body. Your slight belly now completely gone, replaced with a set of hard defined pecs and abs. The twigs that used to be your arms swelled in size as your biceps now measure 18 inches around. Your new arms laced with ink as they begin to form an intricate designed tattoo.

Your mediocre legs now resemble thick sturdy tree trunks. Next were your feet as they grew from size 7 to a respectable size 12. Finally you began to feel your once 3 inch cock slowly grow longer and larger in size while the opposite happened to Derek. His once enormous cock has been reduced to 3 inches while you now possessed the massive 10 inch dick.

Soon you barely feel anything Derek is doing and grow impatient. You then unhook yourself from him, stand up and turn to face him. You then plunge your new cock into his ass. Instead of starting off slow you decide to make it quick. Derek lets out a huge moan as you roughly pound his ass. You continue until Derek reached his limit.

“Fuuuuck!” Derek cried out as he forced to release.

“Now be a sweetheart and clean up the mess.” You ordered Derek. He quickly rushes to clean the mess.

You search Derek’s closet in search of new clothes that will fit your new body and come out wearing your new black jeans, some brand new black sneakers and your trusty OBEY cap.

You pull the cap down so it barely covers your eyes, get into a sexy yet intimidating pose, and look down to the new Derek with a cocky grin on your face.

“You’re no longer going to hurt anyone anymore. You enjoy worshipping the body that once belonged to you. The body of a perfect specimen. You’re going to live the rest of your life as my loyal bitch. You’re going to OBEY my every command. You got that!”

[aster-aspera]

The bitter end

Written with @despite-everything-exe

Warnings: major character death

Relationships: platonic DRLAMP (anxceit? maybe)

"It's coming," Patton whispered, barely audible as he looked on in fear. Everything was slow- it had been for years now, but it was the slowest it had even been yet. He could sense it, could feel the sand running out of the hourglass, and the sand was almost gone.

They all knew it was coming. Hell, even Thomas himself had been expecting it, but that didn't make it any less sad. Patton lifted his head up, looking at Roman with already tearful eyes to take his hand tightly. "There can't be much time left- ten minutes perhaps," he whispered, audibly shaky and filled with fear. Now was not a time to hide his emotions.

Truthfully, it hadn't ever been, and Patton scorned his younger self. Not that he could help it now.

Roman squeezed back, trying and failing to hide his tears. He couldn't break now, he needed to be strong. He was a prince, brave even in the face of adversity, even facing the end of all he knew and loved. Even though he knew that the bravery was a lie.

"We should find the others then," he said, standing up to gently tug Patton along, heading to everyone's individual rooms. He could feel the familiar feeling of dread rise up in his stomach, curl around his lungs and slowly cut off his breathing. He knocked on Logan's door.

The second Logan came out, Patton wrapped him tightly in his arms, body shaking with silent sobs as a mixture of death and fear squeezed at his lungs. "It's happening," he whispered in his ear, urgency, sadness, and panic curdling together in his voice.

Logan, ever-eloquent as he was, was at a loss for words. "Oh," he whispered, voice falling apart already.

Everything was beginning to feel cold and grey, like the forgotten stone of a weathered grave, no loved ones left alive to lie flowers or mourn.

Roman could feel himself breaking, fear and regret and the overwhelming anticipation of losing his family crashing through him like a tidal wave. A door creaked open from across the hall and he turned to see Virgil, exhausted from his constant worrying, staring at them with a resigned and hopeless expression. "It's happening, isn't it?" He asked, voice already choked up and breaking.

Logan was the only able to nod in confirmation, as Roman looked away at the ground, not wanting to face the others, and Patton had his face buried in Logan's chest.

Virgil used his depleted energy to painstakingly summon the other two sides. There might still be unresolved arguments between them, and unforgiven fights, but the most unforgivable action of all would be to let them die alone.

"What's goi-" Remus started, stopping dead still as soon as he saw the forlorn and empty look in Virgil's eyes. "Oh," he mumbled, just like Logan. Virgil could feel the life seeping out of him- see him turning grey. Janus said nothing, only moving to grip Remus' hand as fear and early onset grief rose in his chest, grabbing his lungs with a desperation that knocked all of the air from his body.

"Let's head to the commons," Patton rasped. He didn't want to spend his dying moments in a dark hallway. Dark holes were where you were supposed to go after you died, not beforehand. You were supposed to die with those you loved.

Well now, they could all die together. The worst kind of party.

They all shuffled to the common room together, a miserable parade heading towards their own funeral. Janus looked around, at the people he had spent his whole life with, the people he considered family. He remembered birthdays and Christmases, movie nights and tight hugs. None of them even felt real now.

He felt his heart sink, his chest feeling like an empty chasm as he yearned for something unidentifiable. They had all known the end was coming, but being face to face with it was a whole different story.

They weren't brave, they weren't happy, and they weren't calm. Panic, sadness, and despair gripped every particle in the air, clinging to their skin as they waited for their death in the cold common room.

Janus noticed Virgil's hand balled up tight in his sleeve, his whole body shaking. He stepped closer to him, Remus following along and gently took Virgil's hand in his, prying open his tightly clenched fist. "Virgil..." He started, a hundred things he wanted to say clamouring for space in his head. Apologies, accusations, memories- there was so much left unsaid between them, and he had no time to fix it.

If only they'd been less stubborn.

Suddenly, Virgil flung his arms around Janus, clinging to him tightly like it was the last time he'd ever get to, only it wasn't a metaphor. "I love you," he sobbed, tears soaking through Janus' outfit and pouring from Virgil's eyes faster than rain in a storm. "I'm so sorry, thank you for everything, and I love you so, so much," he said, voice barely distinguishable beyond the wavering sobs.

He removed his face from Janus' chest to look at the others. "Join us?" he croaked, a fragile sound echoing in the silent grave of a room. At least this way they could all go out together, holding eachother until the bitter end.

Roman nearly fell into their arms, Janus curling an arm around him to keep him steady as Remus took one of his hands, trying to communicate so many things to his brother. He didn't know how to say any of it out loud, so he hoped Roman would understand. Logan nodded and pulled Patton into their little huddle, letting the others wrap their arms around the two of them.

It wasn't particularly comfortable, elbows and shoulders digging into each other at weird angles, everyone pressed just too close for comfort in the cold, dimly lit space. But Logan couldn't imagine a better feeling than all of them together, like this. He wished he had taken more time to enjoy it, to simply spend time with them instead of burying himself in his work.

Regrets seemed a little pointless now- he could feel it all slipping away. Every star in the sky, every fact Thomas had ever learned, the name of every friend. Every moment with the others he'd missed by being too cold and stubborn, fading away. Mistakes he could never amend.

Roman moved a little bit away from Janus to pull his brother into the tightest hug he could- no way was he getting away with merely holding his hand. "I love you. So much," he whispered. "I should've been a better brother, but-" Remus cut him off. "No. None of that. You were perfect."

Regrets, apologies, confessions, and farewells were exchanged in choked-up voices from tear-stained faces. They tied up all the ends they could think of, but of course they were nowhere near a perfect denouement.

Minutes elapsed, sand falling through the glass, fate pulling the time away with its cruel hands, and the reality of the end was imminent.

Thomas' eyes feel shut for the last time and the mindscape went dark, every light switching permanently off. There was barely two minutes left before their world crumbled to dust forever.

"This is it, isn't it?" Roman asked, fear stricken and far from resembling brave or noble. Patton nodded fearfully. "Goodbye, everyone," he choked, recieving a tighter hug from the group and tearful goodbyes in return.

The walls began to crumble, an avalanche that should have been raucous and loud, but everything fell silent.

No noise was made by gasping breaths or falling bricks, and everything began to null.

Their world falling apart around them, they held eachother together in the dark, right until there was nothing.

Right to the bitter end.

[nanasparadise]

Could you perhaps do a yandere Formaggio keeping a smol s/o in pocket or cage or something? 👉👈

Hiya! Thanks for your request, I hope you enjoy it! <3 

“Tiny” Yan! Formaggio x gender-neutral reader

Summary: Formaggio shrinks his darling after one of their escape attempts and keeps them in a pocket and a cage. 

TW: noncon touching and kiss, kidnapping, implied stalking toxic relationship, MATURE AUDIENCE ONLY/MINORS DNI

I do not condone any yandere behaviour in real life.

Word count: 1390

„Please, let me go! You can’t just keep me like that!“, you shouted desperately. Currently, you were in the pocket of Formaggio and about the size of a lipstick at best. The hitman had shrunk you, wanting you to remain by his side. And what better way to do that than to keep you in his trouser pocket? Despite your tininess, Formaggio still heard you. A cruel smile formed on his lips. 

“Ah ah Y/N, you did this to yourself. I’ve told you I’d shrink you if you tried to escape again”, he said condescendingly, while clicking his tongue. The Italian slightly patted his pocket, which caused you to shake around. You were scared, so terribly scared. The man who did this to you grew utterly obsessed with you. You hardly knew him, but he had promised you that he knew you all too well. And for sure, he did: once he had kidnapped you, you had seen all of the photographs of you scattered around his flat. “I’ve warned you, but you wouldn’t listen. That’s the punishment for your disobedience.” 

“Please,” you cried again, “please, if you really love me like you claim, then let me go!” This sentence caused Formaggio to stop walking immediately. He was roaming around the streets and was going back to his flat, since you had decided to escape and now the Italian wanted to bring you back “home”. Formaggio picked you out of the pocket. You tried to struggle his grip, but it was hard to resist when you were the size of his thumb. So all you could do for now was to remain in his palm and stare at his face which seemed gigantic to you. 

“Y/N,” Formaggio said seriously, all of his characteristic laid-back atmosphere gone, “you know I love you. And that’s exactly why you can’t leave. How do you expect me to continue living when you’re not near me, constantly worrying about you? I’ve seen murders, gruesome murders Y/N, some of the victims were even members of my team. I can’t let you have the same fate. Even if that means you have to stay tiny.” His enormous green eyes fixated you. You gulped heavily. “There goes my chance to free myself from him”, you thought depressively. But as quickly as the moment of seriousness (at least serious to Formaggio, since for you the whole situation was very much severe) came,  it also died. A smile appeared on the hitman’s face again. 

“And by the way, I have no problem with keep you so small, it only makes you even cuter than you already are.”

You were stuffed back into his pocket. “Damn it”, you whispered hopelessly. Your feelings of desperation and fear only grew. Tears started pricking in your eyes and eventually streamed down your cheeks. Sobs escaped your lips until you began shaking uncontrollably. Were you doomed to stay with Formaggio while remaining tiny? Formaggio heard your sobbing, making guilt blooming in his chest. But the Italian kept telling to himself that you needed this. You needed him. You were so helpless, it was pitiful. So he ignored your crying and pleading and continued walking back home.

After you two had arrived in his flat, he had immediately placed you in a small cage, which was actually meant for hamsters. You were now at least three hours stuck there and it started to take toll on your sanity. “Great,” you thought, sighing, “I’m equal to a pet.” This thought reduced you back to tears. “Please Formaggio, at least turn me back to my original size”, you begged despairingly. Formaggio had been the whole time with you in the same room, but not saying a single thing. Now that you addressed him, he looked at you through the bars of the cage. God, you were so adorable when you were this small! He gave you a big smile, but you noticed a dark glint in his green eyes. 

“But Y/N, how do I know you won’t escape again?”, he teased you. 

“I won’t! I promise you, I won’t try it again. Just please, I don’t want to stay in this cage.” The hitman seemed to contemplate your words. He remained silent for a few more moment. The quietness weighed down on you and made your palms sweaty. Was he really going to keep you like this forever? “Alright,” Formaggio finally said, “I will size you up again.” A wave of relief washed over your body. 

“Thank you,” you blurted out, “I really can’t- “ 

“But,” Formaggio interrupted you abruptly, “you need to do something for me, just so that I know that you keep your word.” You stared at him with big eyes. 

“What does want from me now?” You would lie if you said you weren’t scared of his intentions. After all, he held you captive. “But still, better to be trapped in a flat like and treated like a person than to be in a cage like an animal.” Your heart began to beat faster, resembling now a hummingbird as Formaggio kept talking. 

“Once you’re normally sized, you’ll kiss me.” Your mouth opened instinctively, giving you an astonished expression. You were well aware of his obsession, but he had always said he wouldn’t pressure you into anything, wanting you to get closer to him voluntarily. So, his words shocked you. “Can I do that? Can I just kiss my captor like that?” Formaggio grew impatient with your silence. 

“Well, amore, if you don’t want to kiss me, then be my guest and remain in the cage. I have no problem with you being my little doll”, the Italian said seemingly teasing, but you could hear the underlying threat in his tone. Did you have a choice? You certainly didn’t want to be tiny forever… A shudder crept down your back. His gigantic eyes were still resting on you, reminding you of a predator. 

“N-No please! I’ll kiss you”, you shouted eventually. Formaggio’s eyes lit up at your words. His characteristic smiled returned on his face. 

“A wise choice”, the hitman joked. You couldn’t laugh though…

Quickly, you were placed out of the cage and on the floor. With the help of his Stand Little Feet you immediately grew back to your initial size. A sigh of relief came out of your mouth as you observed your normal sized limbs thoroughly. Suddenly, a pair of arms draped around your middle. You were dragged closely to Formaggio’s chest. The hitman’s eyes started glowing again, which only made your fear growing in your stomach. “

And?”, Formaggio said with a grin, “Didn’t you want to do something?” You started to slightly shiver. 

“There’s no escape now, Y/N.” Slowly, you forced your mouth closer to his. Formaggio’s eyes were fixated on lips, eagerly awaiting them. Your face was millimetres away from his, you could already feel his hot breath. Still, you didn’t manage to press your lips on his. Overtaken by lust and impatience, the Italian removed one of his arms from your middle and it travelled to the back of your head, pressing it closer to his mouth so that the distance between you was gone. You were too surprised by his sudden action to react. Instead, you instinctively leaned into his kiss. His lips felt warm and soft on yours, almost reassuring. It started out as innocent and calm, but soon the kiss became more demanding and needy. Still paralysed by your anguish and surprise, you let Formaggio do what pleased him. He easily managed to open your mouth and slit his tongue inside of it. The man kept exploring your inside eagerly. After what felt like an eternity to you, Formaggio removed himself from your face. Your shortened breath and heated face as well as a string of saliva coming out of the corner of your mouth were the remains of the passionate kiss between you. Formaggio contemplated your expression, happiness taking over him. His eyes softened as his hands caressed your cheeks. 

“Y/N,” he whispered affectionately, “I love you.” The Italian gave you a little kiss on your forehead, his arms snaking around your middle again. As you were resting your head on his chest, you realised yet again that you couldn’t escape him, no matter if you were put in a cage or not.

[writeyouin]

Swerve X Reader – Changes - Chapter 7

Chapter 7 – A Rescue Without a Plan

A/N – Finally back to this baby, and boy am I glad to be back.

Warnings – None.

Rating – T

“Making your way in the world today, takes everything you've got. Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.” You sang the Cheers song quietly in your cell, concentrating heavily on the cell bars.

Ever since you had forced yourself to calm down, streams of information had come flooding across your optics, revealing structural strengths and weaknesses to everything you looked at. You hoped to find something about the electrified bars that might lead to your escape, but so far, all the weaknesses were ones you couldn’t exploit from within the cell. You had long since given up on desperately trying to contact the Lost Light, figuring that something was blocking your comms.

You sighed, giving up on your song, a childish idea coming to mind. You knew nothing would come of it, but a smile reached your lips as you stared at your hand, “Go-Go-Gadget, Lock Pick.”

Naturally, nothing happened, but at least you were entertained, so you continued the game, taking comfort in the familiar words. “Go-Go-Gadget, Gun. Go-Go-Gadget, Scanner. Go-Go-Gadget, Blow Torch-” You jumped back in shock as one of your fingertips split open at the command, a strong blue flame roaring up from the split. You didn’t know whether you should be praising Brainstorm, for this was most certainly his addition, or cursing him for the cartoonish way you had accessed the tool. You were almost afraid to wonder how many of your body’s other commands were linked to the phrase Go-Go-Gadget.

Without wasting any more time, you put the flame to the bars, beginning the laborious process of escaping your cell.

As you worked, you had one more idea which you hastily tried, “Go-Go-Gadget, Manual.”

Before your optics, a string of writing cropped up, instructions on how your Cybertronian body worked. “Play audio,” You said, having been introduced to the opening menu. Perceptor’s voice filled your audials, starting your tutorial on your new body. You vented air through your systems and got to work, studying during your attempted escape.

Once he had been released from his cell, Swerve spent all of his time at the Lost Light’s shooting range, his aim never improving despite his efforts. He knew he had little hope of becoming a soldier in the time it would take to get to you, but he didn’t care, so long as he had something to keep him occupied. How could other humans be so cruel as to throw you of all people in a battle arena? You were kind and compassionate, and you would never have even considered harming another species, claiming that all were equal.

Swerve had often found you crying over books wherein humans had treated others terribly, mostly among their own species. He remembered asking you why you chose to read such books as The Diary of Anne Frank or Boy Erased, if they only served to make you upset, and you had replied that they were important to read lest history be repeated from ignorance. It was awful to think that you, the most empathetic of souls, were going to be scrapped for the entertainment of others.

Swerve knew they didn’t have long to rescue you. If the Arena’s advertisements were to be believed, you would be entering one of their battles in less than three cycles, when the new contestants would arrive to scrap you.

Swerve couldn’t forget the picture they had uploaded of you on the advertisement. You had been harmed in ways he never wanted to see, deep gashes in your arms and visible dents everywhere, yet in the picture, you were defiantly angry. He alone could recognise the fear beneath, but he couldn’t be prouder to see that you weren’t giving your captor the satisfaction of your apprehension.

He reloaded his gun, aiming it at the target, imagining it was your captors. Despite his anger, he missed, hitting a spot on the wall at least six feet from the target. Coolant sprung to his optics. You were in danger and he was completely useless. He couldn’t pilot the ship, he couldn’t shoot, it wasn’t even him that had discovered your location; that had been Nightbeat while he was too busy feeling sorry for himself. He was useless.

Rodimus’ voice rang clear through Swerve’s comms. It was a channel he had left open until you were found; that way anyone who needed him could contact him.

“Swerve, get to the board room. We have news on (Y/N).”

Swerve brusquely wiped the coolant from his optics, throwing the gun on the table before leaving. As soon as he was in the hallway, he transformed, speeding to the board room, eager for any information he could get, yet also terrified about what it could mean for you.

He didn’t say anything as he entered, his attention, like everyone else’s drawn to the video-feed of the Arena, where a human woman in acid-green armour was speaking.

“Greetings to fans, peasants, and nobles alike. It is I, Lady Ouida, your adored host of the Arena.”

Lady Ouida. Swerve glared at her holographic form, now having a name and a face to put to his enemy.

“As all of us betting royals know, there is to be a new competitor here. The foul-mouthed mini menace has refused to state her name, but we don’t care about that. We only care about one thing and one thing only. Which of our noble competitors will be the one to take her out?”

Banners depicting different armoured competitors unfurled around Lady Ouida; the scumbags that would try to take your life.

“In this message to all of you, my lovely subjects, I would like to make a special announcement. Although we had planned to set the battle for three cycles time, we have hit a little snag.”

Warmth flared in Swerve’s spark, as he hoped that the battle would be delayed even further, giving the Lost Light more time for your rescue.

Lady Ouida snapped her fingers, motioning for someone off-screen to do her bidding. The hope that Swerve had dared to feel was quickly extinguished as several trucks with chain attachments drove forward, dragging you behind them, the chains affixed to your arms.

“Our little menace here was caught roaming the halls of our fair kingdom, trying to escape her fate. She may not look like much, but she has proved to be very resourceful indeed, which I am sure you’ll keep in mind when betting.”

It looked like you desperately wanted to retort, but a modified gag stopped you from doing so. It didn’t stop you from attempting to kick at several of your captors, your pede falling short of its mark.

“NO!” Swerve cried out as you were electrocuted, making you fall to the floor. The others in the room spared him looks of pity before their attention returned to Lady Ouida.

“Spirited, is she not?” The Lady continued, spurred on by your attempted attack. “Alas, that brings me to my next point. We cannot keep her subdued for long and as such, we will have to cut betting short. You will have till the end of the cycle, for at dawn THE BATTLE BEGINS.”

The feed ended with a screen of competitors and their odds against you.

Rodimus wasted no time in addressing the room, all traces of his usual playfulness gone. “ETA to the Arena?” He asked no one in particular.

“Two cycles at most,” One of the Co-pilots answered.

“Not good enough. If you have to burn out the engines, you’ll get us there tonight. Strategy?”

Megatron brought up a hologram for the planet, pointing out the building on the map, a modernised castle with plasma-turrets as its main defences. “If it were me, I’d have the turrets hacked. The fastest route to the Arena itself is by the West wall. The ship is far too big to hide, so our best option is an outright assault. We could blast through the walls with an Alpha team. Meanwhile, a smaller Beta Team could attack the Northern ramparts, where we believe the prison cells to be located, in case (Y/N) is still being held there.”

“Who’s our hacker for this?”

“We have an accomplished team that will be led by Skids.”

“What will we need to get through the castle’s walls?”

“Ultra Magnus assures me that he has a supply of confiscated weapons from Whirl and Brainstorm.”

Rodimus nodded in acknowledgement, “You know Megatron, it’s rare, but on occasions such as this, I’m glad that you’re a crazed war-lord with a lot of strategic experience.”

Megatron looked uncomfortable at the compliment but didn’t comment.

Swerve raised his hand in what he assumed was a military fashion, “I’d like to be in the Alpha team.”

Rodimus took in some air with an awkward hiss, “Yeahhh, about that. Don’t you think you’d be better off, uh waiting to comfort (Y/N) in the med-bay or something? You’re um- You’re not exactly a good shot.”

Swerve bristled at the veiled insult. “THAT IS MY CONJUNX ENDURAE. I’LL BE GOING DOWN THERE EVEN IF I HAVE TO STEAL A POD-SHIP!”

“Okay, yep, cool. You’re there to rescue (Y/N), got it. Just… Maybe stay behind the rest of us, okay? Wait no. You go in front, I don’t want to be shot in the back or anything-” Rodimus stopped talking when he noticed more than one bot glaring at him for his lack of tact. “I mean, uh- You just go where you think is best, buddy. You got this.”

“Let’s just continue going over the plan,” Megatron interrupted, turning his attention back to the planetary holograph.

Thankfully, nobody questioned Swerve further, and he was free to remain undisturbed as the meeting went on.

Once again, you were behind bars but this time you were outside of the prison block. You were now in the centre of the Arena, which greatly resembled the Ancient Colosseums of Earth. You cradled your servo close to your body, the pain immense where your captors had crushed it after they had caught you trying to use the blow torch a second time; if there was any hope of returning to Swerve, it wouldn’t be the same way you escaped before.

With nothing else to do, you resumed listening to the recorded manual. Theoretically, you knew how to scan a vehicle and transform, so long as you found something to scan. Maybe you could convince Ouida to show you a vehicle in order to make the games more interesting. You doubted that plan would work, but if Ouida thought you were going to die in her games anyway, she might grant the request.

“In the event that you are in danger and need to record a message into your processor for an ally to discover-”

You focused on Perceptor’s instructions. Now seemed like the perfect time to record a message for Swerve, should he ever find your body. You tried to focus as your processor informed you that your voice and surroundings were being recorded.

“Swerve, I wish I could see you right now to tell you everything that’s on my mind, but if you’re watching this… Well, we know what’s happened.” You tried to keep your tone happy, but it proved to be impossible when thinking of the last time you had seen Swerve and how badly that had gone. You couldn’t stop from crying as you continued.

“Swerve, you are my whole world. I love you so much and I’m so sorry about how I acted. I was scared and confused, and… That’s no reason for the way I was. I’m terrified of what might happen to you if I die. Please, don’t think sadly on this. You have so much time left in the universe, and it’s a brighter place with you in it. No matter what happens, I need you to remember, I’m sticking with you. Never forget that you have my heart, always. I’m sorry that this is goodbye. I love you.”

Ending the feed, you hugged your knees to your chassis with your good hand, while you sat in silence and wept.

Swerve gripped the base of his chair, in the cruiser that the Alpha team had taken, hard enough to dent it. Upon reaching a close enough proximity to the planet’s surface, he had received a few dozen delayed private comms from you, the last of which was time-stamped only one hour prior. You were being kept in a cage, telling him how sorry you were and how much you loved him. If you were sticking with him, then he was going to stick right back to you.

Turbulence hit the ship, but Swerve’s determination didn’t waver. He knew it was just the first volley of attacks from the turrets, until Skids’ team would be able to disable them. Swerve remembered feeling like this thousands of times in the war. The feeling that you could be shot down at any moment on the way to your goal, but that you couldn’t think about death, lest it leech into your processor, freezing out all other thoughts. Swerve wouldn’t die. He couldn’t. Not while you were in danger. You were his mission and this was just another, smaller, war.

Swerve remembered his very first mission. His entire squadron had died, except for him. Being a mini-bot, he’d managed to hide without being discovered; he’d spent centuries hating himself for living as a coward instead of dying a hero with the rest of his squad. As it turned out, many bots had had similar experiences which haunted them. This time, he would not hide, his team would survive, they would rescue you, and Swerve would tell you every minute of every day that he loved you.

“SKIDS,” Rodimus yelled over the comms, “A LITTLE HELP WITH THE FRAGGING TURRETS.”

“Working on it,” Skids replied frantically. “They have one hell of an IT team there, Rodimus. The turrets are encrypted at least five times over.”

“Great. I’ll pass on the compliment when I meet them. Can you stop the turrets or not?”

There was a sharp silence on Skids end which was answer enough; the team would have to go in under fire.

“Okay,” Rodimus looked to his team. Ultra Magnus, Tailgate, Cyclonus, and Swerve were there, along with a few other volunteers that made their number twenty. “Plan B. We drive fast and furious, ploughing through their defences.”

The team were less enthusiastic at the thought of being shot, but none of them buckled under pressure; everyone was ready to go to your aid.

“Beta team, in position?” Rodimus asked, as they had planned to do before the Alpha Team dropped down onto the planet’s surface.

“Negative,” Megatron replied. His team comprised of Drift, Nautica, Nightbeat, and Brainstorm. It was decided that a smaller team would be better for infiltration. “The blueprints were wrong. We landed right in their armoury and are facing heavy fire.”

“HEY, NO, NOT COOL. WE WERE FACING HEAVY FIRE FIRST.” Rodimus pouted. “THAT’S OUR THING. GET YOUR OWN THING.”

“Don’t be a sparkling,” Megatron hissed. “Rendezvous here. We need backup.”

Swerve crushed another part of his chair. Meeting up with the beta team would lead them further away from you. They should face the turrets, consequences be damned. Swerve imagined reaching over to the control panel and forcing the team to drop. If he wasn’t afraid to have their energon on his servos, he’d do it. However, frustrating as it was, he left the planning up to the Co-Captains, itching for the moment that he would finally be useful. So far, everything in the plan was falling apart.

“Get ready to fight, crew,” Rodimus warned as the cruiser approached the Beta Teams location. Everyone stood up, heading to the back of the ship, “Dropping in three, two, one.”

The doors opened, leaving all the transformed vehicles to drive out on the ramp, jumping the gap onto the planet. There, the battle began. A handful of Cybertronians against a few hundred organics, none of whom seemed to be human; perhaps Lady Ouida was the only human among the organics that inhabited the planet.

Swerve raged with every shot he took. In hallways full to the brim of enemies, even he couldn’t miss. His blaster kept ringing off with compliments. Good job. Nice shootin’ Tex. You’re my hero.

However, as many shots as he got in, the enemies didn’t drop. It seemed that they were immune to most of the weapons, only stumbling slightly before they got back up to fight.

“This isn’t working,” Cyclonus growled through gritted teeth, him and Drift being the only ones to do any real damage with their swords, though they kept getting pushed back by the horde.

“Tell me something I don’t know,” Rodimus said sardonically. “Time for plan C.”

“We don’t have a plan C,” Ultra Magnus reported.

“Then improvise.”

From the corner of his optic, Swerve saw a flash of green and he spun around to see Lady Ouida herself. She was climbing over the rubble, apparently trying to reach the fast-firing ballista behind the invaders of her castle. Full of rage at the human who had dared to harm his Conjunx Endurae, Swerve rushed at her, screaming. He tackled her to the ground, grunting as she stabbed a plasma dagger into his side. He would worry about the pain later, when you were safe. For now, he didn’t care, as that was the only weapon she had and she couldn’t retrieve it from his side now that he had her arms firmly in his grasp.

Swerve had always prided himself on being gentle with you, his beloved human. However, with Ouida in his grip, he was all too aware of how easy it would be to crush every bone in her body with only the slightest bit of pressure.

“WHERE IS MY CONJUNX?” He spat at her.

“Dead.” Lady Ouida lied. “As you will be soon enough, robotic scum.”

Swerve didn’t bother to press her on her deception, knowing instinctively that she wouldn’t talk, no matter what he did. Instead, he carried her towards her army, making sure the creatures could see her.

“I HAVE YOUR LEADER,” He roared at them. “LET US PASS, OR I’LL CRUSH HER.”

The organics stopped shooting, eerily expressionless as they lowered their weapons. Ouida shot her captors a disgusted look, hating that they had bested her experimental mutants. They were made to follow orders and protect the castle, but they had also been designed to ensure that she wouldn’t be harmed; with her as a captive, they were useless.

Swerve made his way forward, but Rodimus grabbed his shoulder-plate, pulling him back.

“Hey, loving the energy buddy,” Rodimus complimented Swerve. “Great improv and all, but uh, the Arena is the other way.”

“Oh,” Swerve looked at the mutant army, who were watching Ouida like a dog watching its master. “In that case, don’t follow us, or I’ll crush her.”

“YEAH,” Rodimus fist-pumped the air. “LET’S GO RESCUE (Y/N).”

You didn’t know what to say as you were faced with the many faces of the Lost Light that you thought you’d never see again, but most importantly Swerve. For a moment, you were half-convinced that you were hallucinating again, but then he had pushed Lady Ouida into Drift’s arms and he was holding you.

He kissed your helm, pulling you into his chassis, checking over every inch of you for injuries. “(Y/N),” he murmured. “My (Y/N).”

“Swerve,” You cried his name. “Swerve. I was so scared I’d never see you-”

“Shh, it’s okay, I’m here now. I love you. Always,” He repeated your message to you, letting you alone know that he had received it.

“Not to interrupt this reunion,” Megatron said sombrely, “But enemy reinforcements could arrive at any moment, and we need to get you two to medical treatment immediately.”

For the first time, you noticed the gash in Swerve’s side, coated with freshly congealed energon; he had taken the dagger out prior to seeing you.

“She hurt you… She-”

It was your turn to scream at Ouida, “YOU HURT MY CONJUNX ENDURAE.”

You reached out to crush her with your good arm, but Drift dragged Ouida into safety, “Sorry (Y/N), but she’s our ticket out of here. If we kill her, we have no leverage.”

You glared at Ouida, “You’re lucky he values all life, you hateful witch.”

Ouida rolled her eyes, unperturbed by the raving antics of a non-organic.

“Come on, (Y/N),” Swerve ushered you ahead of the group. “It’s time for us to go home.”

Home. You thought of your hab-suite aboard the Lost Light where you had built your life with Swerve; you couldn’t wait to get back to it. Letting Swerve cradle you in his arms, you leaned on him and took your first steps back towards home.

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[rk-doscientos]

My contribution to @connor-sent-by-cyberlife ‘s prompt challenge ^^

Day 3: Heaven/Hell

Warnings: mention of death, grief 

The sun was high in the sky that day.

Wrapped in its warm embrace, Connor was lying on the perfectly green, thick grass. He brushed his fingers over its soft blades and bewitched, he observed as they danced in the gentle blows of the wind. 

Above, clouds were drifting lazily across the firmament, taking on all kinds of shapes the android found hard to define. Stretched out by his side, Markus raised his hand and pointed at the one, which, Connor thought, resembled a large, misshapen pigeon.

He didn't pay much attention to it though, as his gaze has already fallen on something far more interesting.  

Markus looked absolutely mesmerizing. His flawless, bronze skin glowed, caressed by the morning sun. His bright, curious eyes were drawn to the sky and a radiant smile spread over his face. His big, strong hands, here and there stained by paint, casually rested on the soft fabric of his shirt.

It all felt like a dream. This place. Markus. The way they were just lying here, as if nothing else mattered. 

It couldn't be happening, could it?

A sudden surge of panic swept through the android. No. He couldn't think that. He desperately tried to chase the thought away. 

Markus must have noticed the change in him because in a moment he turned, so that now he was facing Connor. Their eyes finally met. 

"Is everything alright, love?" he asked, his voice soothing and full of worry.

Of course. Connor tried to force a smile, but his lips barely moved. He felt a lump in his throat. 

These past few weeks were the best in his life. There was no Cyberlife to boss him around. No humans to put him down. Just him and Markus, the person he loved the most. 

Connor was free. And for the first time he felt happy.

But it didn't mark the end of his story. 

Markus reached out his hand and gently cupped Connor's cheek. 

"Talk to me," he said pleadingly. There was an edge to his soft voice. 

Words seemed to have stuck in Connor's throat, but no matter how hard he tried to fight them, there was no way of avoiding the truth.

He was living in a dream. The kind you'd never want to wake up from. But just as much as it made his spirits fly, it also melted his wings more and more every day. And the higher he ascended, the more afraid he was of the fall. 

Connor lowered his eyes, feeling like not being able to look Markus in the face. Voice shaking, he spoke under his breath:

"You aren't real, are you?"

It was a question, but Connor wasn't waiting for an answer. He knew all along. 

He wanted to believe it was real. He wanted it so bad.

But the reality didn't care about what he wanted. It was what it was, cruel and unrelenting, and not even the strongest desire of a heart could change it. 

Tears began to fill the android's eyes. Markus gently lifted his chin, causing their gazes to lock again. 

No. Not Markus. Just a mere projection of him. A reminder of what could have been. 

Connor sat up abruptly. There was so much going on inside of him. So many feelings he'd repressed before.

Helplessness. Frustration. Despair. Grief. 

Sometimes he wished he'd never become a deviant. 

There was no longer sunshine in the Zen Garden. No longer funny shapes of clouds. The sky went dark and everything seemed to lose its colors. Tears rolling down Connor's cheeks mixed with the pouring rain.

His broken wings couldn't carry him anymore. Connor fell. He drowned in the sea of lies he'd been telling himself. There was no escape. 

"Markus was everything to me," he grieved. "I didn't realize it until it was too late." 

He felt a comforting hand touch his shoulder. 

"I couldn't even say goodbye to him." 

"Why don't you do it now?" 

Connor looked up at the android. There was genuine sadness to his mismatched eyes. Rain glistered on his skin and the soaked up clothes stuck to his body. His hand moved and was now softly stroking Connor's cheek. 

"Before you go," he whispered. "Let us have this one last moment."

A small shiver ran through Connor's body. He never thought he'd get to say goodbye to Markus. He hoped he'd never have to. 

He still remembered what he'd said to him the last time they met. A promise he'd never kept. 

We'll meet again, won't we, Connor?

He wrapped an arm around Markus' neck. 

"You can count on it," murmured Connor, closing the distance between them. 

Their lips landed on each other and it felt just like the first time, stomach trembling and heart pounding. It was so urgent and needy, yet so tender and sweet. Overwhelmed with sensations, Connor almost forgot it wasn't his Markus kissing him, on a cold November evening, with Detroit at their feet. 

"I wish we had more time," groaned Markus, slowly pulling away from the kiss. Connor already missed the taste of his lips. 

He tried not to look at the android as he stood up, letting go of his touch. He knew that if he waited there any longer, he might never leave. He might believe in this all over again. 

Hardly had he walked away, when a voice from behind caused him to stop. His heart skipped a beat. 

"We'll meet again, won't we, Connor?" 

He knew what he wanted to say. He had it on the tip of his tongue. But the words couldn't leave his mouth. 

He turned around to take in the sight of his lover one last time. 

"I doubt there's a heaven for androids."

[interstellarrambles]

I’ve never requested anything from anyone but I’m in desperate need for a billy x goth!reader. Idk just how he noticed her in school cuz she is the only goth person and always asks her out and they flirt but she always rejects him until one day she agrees. Idk if that makes sense but thank u :)

a/n: so I dont know how to feel about this, I might edit and come and change it because I'm not sure of the ending, but if you like it, let me know! I tried to make it sweet at the end but this is definitely out of character for Billy, but I'm soft for him so idc. @savvy7392 I really really really hope you like this im sorry it took ages

harsh, confident and undeniably cool: everyone at Hawkins High knew not to fuck with you - you'd forged your own path in previous years and showed no signs of slowing down any time soon. there was just something about you that made people want to simply observe from the sidelines. known for dark makeup, brash music and taking no one's bullshit, you were somewhat of a divisive figure: people either really hated you and tried to make your life misery (to not much avail) or desperately wanted to befriend you.

somehow, along the way you'd made friends with the likes of Robin and by association, Steve, but you were happy with your small group of friends and didn't really care all that much for your hometown and what (or who) it had to offer.

therefore, when a fresh faced californian boy toy entered Hawkins High, you couldn't deny there was a certain allure to his cool demeanour and newness. unluckily for you, Billy found his place with the current popular kids sucking up to him and soon the rumours about you began to surface again. whenever you caught his eyes within the first few days of his arrival, his gaze would be quickly diverted by Tina or Carol as they glared at you or threw insults. that's why you decided it really wasn't worth getting involved with Billy Hargrove, even if he did have an amazing taste in music.

but God did you misunderstand the lengths to which this boy would go for your attention.

the first few days, Billy would opt for a smile sent your way, enough to make you weak at the knees but not quite enough to make you wander over to him. group projects would be announced in class and when he tried to subtly join you, you'd amble to the opposite end of the room to be with a bunch of kids you didn't even know, just to avoid him. and Billy knew you did it on purpose since after sitting down with your respective groups, you caught his eye and simply winked at him.

almost dropping his pencil in surprise, he was genuinely unable to believe you had successfully ignored him in such a blatant way. smirking back at his gaping mouth and sparklingly amused eyes, you simply laughed it off, sparking a conversation up with the boy next to you as easily as you had rejected Billy. shaking his head in disbelief, he made a promise to himself he'd make you friends with him if it was the last thing he did.

another day, you arrived at school with a too-short black skirt on and Billy felt his heartrate quicken at simply catching one glimpse of you, his blood rushing just a little faster than usual. he would never have the guts to tell you, but he absolutely adored the way you dressed and how good it made you look.

unexpectedly, you treated him to an actual wave this morning, something that fuelled his pursuits. all day, he pestered you in class, forcing those who would usually take the seat next to you to move elsewhere so he could be closer to you. deep blue and bright with attraction, his eyes would drop down to your thighs and the way they looked so amazing in the skirt you were wearing. desperately, he wanted to say something about it to you, but he knew he'd trip over his words; already he had blushed intensely when you caught him staring, though at least he could tell you were enjoying his gaze.

rather annoyingly, you did like the attention, smiling to yourself when he would ignore other people so he could walk you to your next class even if he was rambling to himself the whole time. curls falling in his face and a cheesy grin playing on his cheeks were enough to make butterflies swarm your insides and you had a terrible time trying to hide it.

in reality, you really didn't want to be cruel since it appeared he didn't really have anyone that cared about him much past the muscles and cute eyes, but you also were not about to walk straight into a heartbreak with both eyes open. billy was definitely a bad influence, even to you, the resident goth of Hawkins High, and whether he meant it or not, you knew you would eventually get hurt.

the next time, he plagued your locker with letters and notes and waited next to it, a permanent grin locked onto his features.

a red shirt clung to his biceps, tan skin visible due to the multiple buttons left undone and a silver chain dangling and catching in the light. strong and slightly overpowering yet undeniably attractive, his unique smell of cologne and liquor and maybe a little something else invaded your private space, making you way too nervous to deal with him this late in the day.

weeks of notes and smiles and blue eyes meeting yours way too often had weakened your resolve and if it didn't disgust you so much you would be able to admit Billy was slowly turning your heart to mush. you couldn't listen to mötley crüe without thinking of him and every time you picked out an outfit, you wondered if he'd think you were beautiful or if he'd like the band on your shirt. his compliments and soft gestures like driving you home and giving you his jacket when it was raining (even if it didn't fit your look) had grown on you massively. now you would even go as far to say you enjoyed his company.

"heya baby girl," he drawled, the curl of his plump lips breathtaking in the worst ways, "fancy coming along with me for the evening?"

even though he exuded pure confidence, you didn't miss the way he resembled a kicked puppy when you smiled and responded, "I've got assignments pretty boy, no thanks," shovelling the letters into your bag and turning on your heel to walk home.

unfortunately, this wasn't quite good enough for Billy, hence why he followed quickly, his voice echoing after you, "what's with the ignoring me constantly y/n? you stand at parties and complain about the music and watch me all night and yet you walk away when I come up to you. I've seen you staring at me in class sometimes or at lunch when I'm not bothering you and whenever I catch your eye, you leave. you watch me all the time and yet every time I think you'll come over, you ignore me. if you don't like me, that's okay but I need to know now."

cheeks burning with embarrassment, your eyes dropped to the ground as he pulled you away into privacy. you didn't know what to say.

"billy..." you managed, still unable to meet his chaotic gaze as he stood only centimetres away, breathing hard while he awaited your response.

"what is it? just give me a reason." he almost pleaded, relaxing slightly when you gave him a smile and finally met his eyes.

"do you realise how badly your friends hate me? because I dress weird and I listen to music they don't and I've always been different and you hate that they don't like me. I can't spend five minutes with you in public before you get nervous, I'm sick of you hiding me away! you're fine with me unless there's someone around and I don't understand it and it is tearing me apart," your outburst pulled at him, making him feel terrible for calling you out prematurely.

"I like you Billy but I can't deal with that. I like my little life of listening to bad music with my friends and dreaming of getting away one day and hanging at the mall with Steve and Robin. I love sitting in your car and sharing those moments you don't let anyone else see. I do. but I wont let you pretend I don't exist."

shifting on your feet slightly, you realised how ridiculous the whole thing was and all you wanted was for billy to scoop you up in his arms and make the world better again. you wanted him to let you do his eyeliner and you wanted to feel his hands on your hips, his touch driving you wild. you wanted him to kiss you right now in the hallway and tell everyone else to screw off.

but life isn't a dream.

so you settled for Billy whispering his sorrys and offering you his hand, which was enough to nearly make you cry since he would never usually be so open in public. content, you followed him as he led you to his car, all the while promising he'd change things for you, only stopping to talk properly when you reached it.

"promise me something Billy?" after confirmation from him, you continued, leaning against the hood of his car, him stood only centimetres away "you'll never be ashamed of me?"

"never doll, there's nothing to be ashamed of," he leaned in, holding either side of your face ever so gently, and when the kiss finally broke, he whispered, "now how about a date?"

"okay pretty boy, you name it."

that was a good enough start.

[hs-devote]

v. láthi: the secret

Moodboard * Content * Masterlist

Disclaimer:

All characters and situation in this story are fictitious. Resemblance to any person living or dead is only God knows.

chapter iv. the mistake

v. the secret

Harry decided to return to Centauri. He comes home feeling that everything he had done was in vain. His mission wasn't successful on Earth, and he felt useless for that. He even felt that his mission is no longer important. Well, it is. It’s important because it’s not only about him, his family, but also his crown and realm. He’s sure Selene will reproach him because he comes home empty-handed. He failed to find the Goddess of Birth and brought her back to where she came from. But, he didn’t care.

Nothing can bother him who’s grieving.

That day, when he came into the empty house of Y/N and Ilitia. His eyes found a scene that had been indigestible and incomprehensible until now. He saw his lover’s lifeless body in her grandmother’s arms who was so hysterical patting her cheek and calling out her name. He remembered very well how Ilitia sobbed while caressing her granddaughter’s pale face, eyes closed with blueish lips.

He remembered where he ran towards them, checking for a pulse he couldn’t feel. He didn’t see Y/N’s chest rising and falling to breathe, he couldn’t feel the breath through her nose, and how her body limped every time he shook her.

No, Harry didn’t understand.

No, Harry couldn’t believe it.

He shook his head in disbelieve and dropped his knees next to Y/N's limp body. His hands began to tremble as he patted her cheek while calling out her name. But, the way her head lolled to the side, confirming his nightmare.

He tried to make her breath by pressing her chest, hoping for a positive response. However, still, nothing changes. He gulped, his heart baulked at his brain's thinking. His tongue-tied to say the truth he expected.

Everything felt hazy. But, one thing for sure that he lost Y/N forever and so suddenly.

And what he regrets, until now, he couldn’t see her for the last time.

He wanted to kiss her for the last time, although she wouldn’t kiss him back. Yet, Ilitia kicked him out right before he got the chance. She screamed, blaming him for her granddaughter’s sudden and shocking death. The excruciating pain and rejection brought tears to his eyes, and the first time of him wept over a human. He realised that Ilitia really hated him when the woman didn’t allow him to even remember Y/N for the last time. And what he did at that time was.. relent, letting the little family mourning.

Harry didn't know the humans' traditions for someone death. Which he heard, humans do funerals a few days after the day of death. And when he returned to Y/N's house, her house was uninhabited. Then, he came to her work and met her co-worker, Mia. Mia told him that Y/N's funeral had been a few days ago and her grandmother, who's now alone, decided to leave Italy.

How did Harry feel?

He was sad, didn't deny the feeling of angry and disappointed. He just wanted to meet his lover whom he loved so much in a short time. He regretted his lack of efforts to try to meet her on her last days. Oh, if only he had known…

His chest felt tight thinking about her. He's confused, he's lost without her.

When the night comes, his brain forced him to think about her. Her smile, her laugh. Their memories. Everything.

He cannot bear the pain that makes tears run down his cheeks. And, this was the first time he cried since the death of his parents.

He was always thinking about what made Y/N die. The way her death called her was so sudden and strange.

Why?

How?

And now here he is, in Centauri. To recover, to heal his pain.

When he arrives at his castle, he feels all eyes are on him. It's obvious for his people that their God isn't all right. He comes back with grim, unsteady steps, and ignores all those who bow at him. Even when Selene greets him, he's not interested at all. He doesn't let her hugs and kisses him, only going straight to his bed-chamber to rest. . . . .

Harry doesn't know how long he was standing on the balcony of his bed-chamber and stared blankly at the view in front of him and doesn't realise that Selene was standing behind him.

The woman looks at her husband who's sad and agitated, unwilling to say a word. He pondered with his own mind, and even the beautiful expanse of Spikenard and Dianthus gardens under their bed-chamber balcony cannot take off his mind. And she wonders why.

“Harry, darling..” she gently touches his arms, “You're awfully quiet today. What's wrong?”

He only slightly turns his head before gripping the railing with both his hand, now ducking his head down and looking at the blooming Spikenards and Dhiantus below.  Selene just let out a sigh as she rolls her eyes, looking for a way for him to talk to her. She missed him too much and she wants to spend time with him with their bed which felt even more empty and cold with his absence every day.

“How's your mission? I can't wait to meet that Goddess and ask for her blessings. When do you think we can meet her?” she babbles as she put her head on his shoulder lovingly, her fingers rubbing his toned chest, “Sometimes I think, that Goddess is very troublesome with her mysterious disappearance and chose to live with lowly creatures on Earth. Did she not remember that she was a Goddess?”

Still, Harry doesn't budge and let his wife do whatever she wants. Meanwhile, Selene is getting more and more annoyed that her husband doesn't seem to care. Slowly, she grabs his face and brings his lips closer for her to land a kiss. Yet, he quickly avoids her and let go of her hand from him. He really isn't in the mood and just wants to grief.

“I'm sorry, Selene. I just–”

"What's wrong with you, Harry?!" his wife's voice is loud enough to make him flinched, and seeing she's so angry with her face now starting to turn red. Harry doesn't know why his refusal makes his wife furious. Indeed, during their married life, he almost never refused her touch, and only this time he did. He knows where this will lead to. It's just doesn't feel right for him to intimate with her while his heart is still grief the death of his lover on Earth.

"You came back with failure and empty-handed. Your behaviour is weird, you refuse to speak!" Selene hisses, "I've told you it's not important for you to go to that pathetic place. And now what? There's no difference between you and our useless men. You lingered on Earth doing nothing, not finding that fucking Goddess, and coming back here like this. What is this behaviour on you?"

“You called me useless?” he scoffs, staring at Selene in disbelief, “What in this realm your reason-”

“Don't twist my word–”

"You said I am no different with our men that are useless, according to you!"

“That's the truth. Our men are useless to find that Goddess, then you insisted on going down to Earth alone and refused to be accompanied by one of our trusted men.” she folds her arms together, “And looking at you now like this, I suspected something was happening on there  and you weren't honest with me.”

Harry scoffs, shaking his head and leave her alone in their bed-chamber. He's too annoyed of arguing with Selene and doesn't want to stir things up because he knows she will bring up this matter. However, it seems that the Goddess isn't satisfied and continues to demand the truth. She rushed to follow her husband behind and keeps yelling at him to be honest. And of course, it makes their servants and guards look at their God and Goddess in confusion. For the first time in forever, they see the romantic couple fight and even continued to the throne room.

“What should I do any more for making you tell the truth, forgetting the Earth and whatever happened there? Your place is here as God, the ruler of Centauri. Not in the mortal realm with the pathetic creature who make you messed up like this!" Selene cries, doesn't care with her voice echoed the empty throne room since there were only the two of them. Their servants and guards are very aware of their privacy and choose to step aside. After all, they don't want to be punished by the Goddess later if they overheard their conversation.

Harry quickly turn around, looking at Selene who's glaring at him. He doesn't say a word, letting his wife bring out whatever she feels. However, the more she shouts, the more he digests every word she said. Then, he realises something.

"It was you, wasn't it?" he hisses. His green eyes seeking the truth through Selene's eyes. He recalled her threat some time ago when she suspected him. However, she didn't bring it up again after that. Yet, he knows his wife well. She doesn't have to give him a warning anymore to make her do something awful. Selene indeed is a kind Goddess, but she can be a little cruel if she wants to. Especially when it comes to something she has or wants.

"I have to get rid of someone who seduces my husband. Moreover, she's nothing more than.. lowly and mortal creature." Selene calmly answers her husband, her face showing no emotion. Far from Harry who's suppressing his anger.

She sighs before shaking her head, “I couldn't let that rotten whore get in the way of our dreams.”

“What did you just say?” Harry takes a step closer with heaving chest. He doesn't accept his wife calling Y/N with such a name. He knows what he was doing, cheating behind Selene's back, was a mistake. Yet, he also couldn't allow Y/N to be humiliated and belittled, even if it was by his own wife.

“Even a whore is worth more than her.”

“Selene!”

“What!?” Selene yells, “Why are you still defending her, Harry? Do you love her so much that you have the heart to hurt your own wife? What did you see on her?”

"Yes, I do love her." he gives in, his eyes are still glaring at his wife as if she is now his enemy. "Why are you so desperate to kill her? Why did you do that, Selene? I know I was wrong but you didn't have to kill her! I was the one to made a move, not her."

“Because she has what we've been waiting for, Harry!” her scream echoed the whole room again, and she doesn't care if anyone hears. And this is her way of letting out her feelings, yelling at her husband to realise why she did that. She can't cry in front of Harry because her heart is refusing, she can't look weak in front of the man who has hurt her.

“I knew you were having affair with that woman for a long time, since the beginning of your arrival on Earth. I purposely let you for a few months of your time on there. Wish you will realise how wrong it was. Yet, what did I get?” she let out a sarcastic laugh before continuing what's bugging her mind, “You failed on your mission and fooled around with her, leaving your wife waiting for.. at least some good news.”

“You don't know how much I hate her when I knew your relationship with her. But, my hatred got worst when I found that someone could bear a child of my own husband. How sick was that?”

"I can't let my husband have mistress, and she's the one who gives him an heir. Let alone she's a human. Imagine what the realm would think if the successor to the throne was descended of a human?"

Harry never flicks his head that fast. He didn't mishear, did he?

He deliberately let Selene vent her anger to make her satisfied. Yet, the words that just left her mouth makes his brain seem slow to think.

“What did you mean by that, Selene?” he whispers, “If you keep talking nonsense, I swear–”

“I killed her because she was carrying your child, Harry!”

Selene no longer can contain her disappointment, and let the tears she desperately held back, roll down her face. Different from Harry who looks at her in shock, as if she had just told him a truth that he couldn't accept. However, it's true.

“That's not funny, Selene. How–”

“With you who have always had sex with her for months, nothing is impossible, Harry. Now, let me ask you. How long have you had an affair with her?” she sobs. But, it seems that Harry is still trying to remember the times where he was so complacent about his affair with Y/N. Until several minutes passed, he still can't answer her since he's so confused. How came a God impregnate a human?

"For months you were on Earth, making no effort to find that Goddess. Instead, you were having fun with her." she continues, "When I found out the news, I was so angry and disappointed. Why she could have what I want? It's disgusting to think that there was a human being who was pregnant by my husband and the child would be the first heir to the throne if it was born. I'm not allowing humans to interfere with our realm."

“How did you know if Y/N was pregnant with my child?” his voice barely just a whisper, still can't believe what Selene told him. This is too much for him to think. Y/N's death, Selene found out their affair, and now he just finds out that Y/N was pregnant with his child, his first child.

"I'm not stupid to let my husband go beyond my supervision. Even though you were not with her, my men still keeping their eyes on her every day. And when I was stalking her that day at her house, I knew which women are pregnant or not. As easy as that." she scoffs, "If I let it any longer, you'll find out and you'll protect the child desperately."

She adds afterwards, "And thinking that you would make her your mistress. I am the Goddess of Centauri, the wife of the realm's ruler, the rightful one – I would do anything to thwart it all. What would our people think if they found out, their ruler betrayed not only the throne, but them?"

Harry hasn't yet had time to open his mouth, a very familiar voice interrupted them. For a moment, he thinks he's hallucinating. But, when he looks for the source of the sound, he's shocked.

How could that be?

There, standing the grandmother of his lover. Her appearance is so different from usual, the lady dressed like a Goddess. Ilitia looks so charismatic despite her old age. He thinks, how did she get here? And most importantly, how could she know about Centauri and where the realm is?

Not long after, two guards rushed into the throne room, looking scared because the intruder managed to get into and met their God and Goddess. If Selene just raises her eyebrows at the guards, Harry makes eye contact with Ilitia. If he stares at her in confusion, Ilitia shots him a glare.

“Your Majesties! I'm sorry but this intruder–”

The guards close their mouths when Harry raised his hand, asking them to shut up. They bow at him and Selene who now studying Ilitia from head to toe before excusing themselves to remain on guard at the entrance.

"You may be wondering why I got here, Harry." Ilitia opens her mouth and averts her gaze to Selene. "And finally I can meet you in person, Selene."

“Who are you and how dare you address me by the name?!” Selene hisses while squinting her eyes, “How brave of you to infiltrate my castle.”

“How did you get here, Ilitia?” Harry whispers, “How do you know this place?”

“You call yourself the ruler of Centauri, the mighty God. Yet, you couldn't recognise me?” Ilitia shakes her head, “Your predecessors would be disappointed if they're still alive.”

“Tell us what do you want. We have more important things to do than have to deal with you.” Selene then turns to look at her husband, “Why don't you throw her out? She–”

“You can't just kick someone out especially the ones you've been looking for.”

“What?”

“Too bad Harry couldn't recognise me as the Goddess of Birth even though he saw me often.”

What Ilitia just said in front of them makes Harry widens his eyes. Ilitia must be kidding, right?

How could she claim to be the missing Goddess of Birth all of sudden? She's a human for God's sake, and Harry knows that really well. She showed no signs as a one.

“I am the one who you've been looking for. I am the Goddess of Birth.”

The words come so easily from the old lady's mouth while the husband and wife stare at her as if she has just grown a second head. Someone they had been looking for just appeared before them. However, someone who is very close to Harry and he couldn't sense her aura at all.

“You must be kidding, Ilitia.” Harry shakes his head, “If you're the one, I should have sense you at the first time. You're a human, and you can't speak like that.”

"If I am a human, how could I know this place and to got here and meet you?" Ilitia asks him, "If I am not the one, how could I know that you're looking for me for help because your wife cannot conceive while you need an heir to the throne, Your Majesty?"

“Your father, Dias, was the king of the Gods. And your mother, Tileia, the Goddess of Women and Family. They only have one heir, and it's you. Harry, the child who inherits all of the Gods and Goddesses power because your parents were so loved by the universe.” Ilitia sighs, “And even the stars and the moon bowed down at your birth.”

Harry was silent. His mother once told this story when he was a child, about how universe so blessed with the birth of the heir of the Centauri's throne. And the stars with the moon bowed down when he was born into the world.

If Ilitia could find that out, there was no way she would lie about who she is. And that leaves him even more speechless.

"Very well, then." Selene breaks the silence, "Welcome back, Goddess. What made you finally decide to come back, after all this time?"

Ilitia scoffs, “You said that you were looking for me but didn't know my name?”

"My bad. Welcome back, Carmenta." Selene faking her smile. Although she's happy to finally meet the Goddess of Birth, her arrival isn't exactly right when she was arguing with Harry. Talking about him, he seems to be in deep thought. How could he not be aware of it? The Goddess' name is Carmenta, and her name on Earth is Ilitia. And Ilitia is another unpopular name for Carmenta. Of course, she used that name to disguise herself among humans.

“I sense you're still mourning the death of my granddaughter, Harry.” Ilitia then shifts her gaze to Selene, looking at the woman with so much anger, “Ironically, it was your wife who killed Y/N herself.”

"Wait a minute. I don't understand. I've never killed any other Gods or Goddesses or their descendant!" Selene shrieks, "You're talking nonsense!"

Ilitia deadpanned, “You killed my darling Y/N because she was carrying your husband's first child, the heir to the Centauri's throne. You didn't want your husband to have a mistress and then get rid of you because you can't conceive.”

“What–”

“Y/N is her granddaughter, an adoptive to be exact.” Harry mumbles, “You knew that Y/N was pregnant with my child?”

“I am the Goddess of Birth, of course I knew. Even though Y/N didn't know she was pregnant.”

“Then, if you knew who I am, why did you let it at from the beginning?”

"I let you be with her because I know that Selene can't give you an heir until whenever. Your fate has been written since you were born that you would have heirs outside of your marriage. And when you met Y/N, I could feel that fate was coming, and I let it be. I kept her to still pure until you met her because her fate to bear the descendant of Centauri's Gods even though she's just a human."

“This is no coincidence, Harry. I adopted her parents because I knew your fate and even hers, long before she was even born.”

“And you knew her fate will end like this, didn't you?” his voice barely just a whisper, thinking about the death of Y/N still makes him uncomfortable especially in a situation like this.

“One's destiny could change if there was other interference.”

“And what was it?”

“Your wife.”

“Hold on,” Selene cuts them off, “So, Y/N is your granddaughter? You adopted a human then it was her your granddaughter?”

“Sometimes humans are better than us, Selene.” Ilitia changes the subject, doesn't want her heart hurts if she keeps thinking about her beloved Y/N, who's no longer with her. Her irritation grows when Selene chuckles and shakes her head.

“A noble creature like you adopted humans and take care of them like your own blood? How awful.”

“Selene!”

Harry yells at his wife. But, it seems she doesn't care and just rolls her eyes, looking bored with the conversation she thinks isn't important. She just wanted this Goddess to help her get pregnant immediately.

"At first, I believed in you and the destiny that was made. However, when I found out that your wife was going to kill Y/N, that's why I suddenly pushed you away. To protect her and her baby. But, it seems that Selene worked harder so that she succeeded in killing your lover and future child." Ilitia speaks sadly, "And it's gotten worse when I found out that the cursed Goddess is your wife."

“Cursed Goddess?” Harry stares at her dumbfounded, ignoring Selene who now looks panicked.

“You don't know she's a cursed Goddess?” Ilitia raises her eyebrow, “You have married her but have no idea about her past? Really, Harry?”

“Carmenta, I order–”

"I'm taking no order from anyone because I do not belong to the court." Ilitia shuts her, "Selene was a Goddess of Moon, and now is a cursed Goddess. She seduced and lured a human, visited him every night while he lay asleep. She sneaked out with him afterwards and fucking each other. The court found out her sin, punished her by removing her power, and cursed her that she couldn't have children forever and no power in the realm can help her. Even Gods or Goddesses, like me."

Selene covers her ears with both hands, doesn't want to hear her dark secret being brought up in front of her husband. She never told Harry about this. At first, she didn't care about the curse. Yet, when she married him, having children became her focus if she didn't want her position as the Goddess in Centauri to be replaced.

“You never saw her show her power, didn't you?” Ilitia smiled mockingly, shrugging her shoulders to Selene.

"And, Harry? It's not just Y/N's fate to carrying your child. She's a reincarnation of a Goddess long before your time, she and her spouse were forced to separate because she couldn't carry a child. The court dumped her to the Earth. While she was being on Earth, her spouse still was in their realm and to marry another Goddess to produce an heir. Her spouse felt guilty knowing she was alone suffered, yet he prayed to the universe that someday she would find happiness. Even if in another life. Yet, the chaos Centauri brought to Syracuse centuries ago made it all fall apart."

“How did you know?”

"Because I was her spouse married to. I knew her pain, I felt that I have betrayed her who was actually my childhood friend. I begged to the God of Life for sparing me long live until I could make up for feeling guilty and help her to be happy." . . . .

Y/N was fidgety all day, she really missed Harry and wanted to meet her lover so much. These several days, her grandmother never left her alone and always at home, as if imprisoning her with the circumstances. Even Ilitia strictly forbade her to go to work, and it irritated her the most. If her grandmother kept telling her off, how could she work and do her activities normally?

But, that day seemed to be on her side.

Ilitia trusted her granddaughter enough to be alone at home and leaving to do some groceries. Initially, Y/N insisted on accompanying her, but she refused since the grocery wasn't far from their home.

And that was when Y/N made sure her grandmother was far enough away, she rushed to pick up her mobile phone and dialled Harry's number, which unfortunately wasn't answered. She tried for two times, yet it seemed the man was busy or didn't have the phone on him.

She had the idea to take the opportunity to escape, didn't care if Ilitia didn't find her at home. She just wanted to meet Harry for a moment.

Yet, when she put on the floppy hat that Harry gave her, she winced as the front door slammed hard enough. She wondered why her grandmother came home so early sounding so irritated from how hard the door slammed.

That was weird.

Ilitia always calls her when she comes home from anywhere, and it becomes her habit to call her mia cara.

But, she didn't hear it this time.

Shrugging it off, she came out of her bedroom and rushed out to her grandmother. However, she didn't find Ilitia there. The door was wide open, and Ilitia's pots were crushed beside the door.

Something went wrong...

“Nonna?”

Silence...

“Non– who are you?!” Y/N squinted her eyes when she found three unfamiliar figure standing right in front of her. Ilitia couldn't be careless enough to leave the door unlocked even though she was inside. How could these strangers break into her home?

“What are you doing in my home?”

Those strangers didn't say a word. Instead, they kept on moving forward making Y/N widened her eyes.

“Hey, hey, hey! What are you do–” she hadn't finished her word when one of them pulling her arm and yanked it. The poor girl stumbled on her feet and fell to the floor. Her feelings were chaotic at the moment, her brain was thinking hard how could she fight them and kick them out, close and locked all the doors and windows and hide inside. Or, how to get out of there.

Well, she had to be strong if she wants to survive, did she?

Y/N tried to stand up, but one of them flew his hand and scattered the things in the living room. She screamed in shock, one of her family's picture frames hit her shoulder before falling to the floor and shattered.

What was that?

How could those things scatter on the floor without them touching?

Who were they?

What are they?

She gulped, and when the time was right, she immediately got up and ran away from them to her bedroom.

Yet, the luck wasn't on her side this time.

The intruders followed her inside, holding her bedroom's door when she was about to close it. What was the power of woman dealing with three men at once?

Y/N was freaking out. What did they want from her?

“Go away! Go away!” she stupidly yelled while trying to shove away the hand was holding her door, “What do you want?”

“You.”

She screamed when they succeded open the door wide and cornered her. She panicked even more when one of them grabbed her wrist making her stiffened. What kind of power or magic they had to make her like that?

“Our Goddess wish your death before the moon appears in the dark. You wish your own death by interfering the peace of our God and Goddess."

She frowned. What?

“I'm sorry, but I don't understand–”

“No kind in the realm will do such a thing to Centauri.”

Centauri..

Centauri...

That sounded familiar.

Hold on..

The myth.

“Wha–”

Y/N hadn't yet had a chance to speak when the pain gnawed at her body. Oxygen seemed to be being drained from her lungs, making her stuffy and unable to breathe. She didn't understand. They didn't strangle her, but why could it be difficult for her to catch a breath?

Her other free hand desperately trying to free her wrist, but the other two men held her back. She coughed badly, his head dizzy made her weak and lost her strength.

She gave up, she couldn't think how she could get rid of this pain. She just prayed whoever was suspicious with the door to her house wide open and immediately helped her. When she felt their grip loosened on her, she felt a little relieved, thinking they were satisfied enough to torture her.

However, that was a grave mistake.

When they dropped her body to the floor, the pain grew even more. Her lungs still struggling for air, while the excruciating heat ran through her already weak body. She cried as she felt like a thousand needles pricking into her skin.

“Long live the Gods and Goddesses. Long live the throne. Long live Centauri.”

That was the last word she heard before her eyes closed, yet until the last seconds of her life, Y/N prayed for her grandmother and Harry, to be happy no matter what, even if she could no longer standing beside them.

Harry gasps, his eyes were wide open with sweat pouring down his face. The God sighs when he realises it's already morning, the shining light through his wide-open balcony window shine into his bare chest. The dream he just had earlier, was very scary for him.

He saw how his innocent lover was killed by guards he knows so well, and seemed so loyal to his wife that they obeyed to kill someone who wasn't wrong. His Y/N was tortured, her right to life was taken away by a creature that she even thought was a myth.

He cannot try to remember the dream or.. nightmare again. Too painful, too tormenting his mind.

And he cannot stop thinking about Selene. He felt betrayed by her. All this time, he had seriously misjudged his wife.

About Selene, with Ilitia or Carmenta's professing faith and her own confession, Harry dragged his wife to the court to atone for her crimes. Even so, he believes that her punishment isn't severe because humans aren't their obligation. However, he thinks to ask for a marriage annulment since he's too fed up with her. At least, this time he's free from her since she had to be exiled until her trial day.

He sighs, realising that he's in his home. Although he was happy to be back, it was a sign that he had to return to being a ruler, a God, and carry out his duties. While on Earth, he was free from his duties and obligations, even it was temporarily. . . . . “Yes, Bernard's border will have additional guards but not reduce the number of other borders."

The advisor nods, understand what Harry means before bowing and excusing himself. While the God himself continued his steps to see his flower garden which he hadn't seen for a long time. Did Selene or their servant take care of them while he was away?

It seemed they did.

His Bellflowers, Hellebore, and Hyacinth are in full bloom, looking beautiful as always. Yet, the longer he stares at his garden, he remembers his lover who's so familiar with them. Hell, he misses her so much making him remember how good she smelt with fresh flowers. If their love story weren't complicated, he might be would bring her here and show her flowers she had never seen on Earth.

Then, he chooses to leave. He doesn't want to cry for her again, he doesn't want Y/N sad because he couldn't accept her death.

But, when he turns around, his body froze. He cannot believe what he's seeing now. His brain and body feel bewitched to be paralyzed for a moment.

Standing in front of him, right in the middle of the garden path, his sweet Y/N throws a sweet smile. A smile that immediately warmed his heart. A smile that he missed it the most. He cannot believe it. His brain denies what his heart is sure of, sure that his love is right in front of him. Looks beautiful and perfect, nothing less.

Smiling like an idiot, Harry steps in haste, yearning to hug her. Suddenly, his steps tripped, causing him to lose his balance and fall to the ground. He chuckles at his folly, so eager to touch her. Getting up, he shakes his head and ready to love on her. However, his smile faded when he no longer see Y/N.

Where is she?

Was it his mind playing a trick on him?

And from that second, tears roll down his cheeks, as if to make him realise that he no longer has her.

Harry lost Y/N, because of himself, of his mistake, of his selfishness.

*

THE END. * When I decided to write this mini series, I didn’t expect that you guys to be so excited about my second series, since my first series isn’t doing good enough. Honestly, I didn’t plan Láthi to have many chapters because the concept is so simple; Harry, who’s a God, cheated on his wife and he regrets that he lost Y/N because of his stupidity. I am very grateful for the excitement, and I hope I can do better with next writing (hopefully). English isn’t my first language, so I’m sorry if there are any errors. Well, this really helps my English.

Cheers! Lydia find me on instagram; @lydiaasft

PS: if you want to talk to me about this series, my writing, or whatever it is. my inbox is always available ;)

[taeyongdoyoung]

summary: the forest is your only escape from the everyday troubles with your family until you find danger lurking behind the trees. or rather, danger finds you. your fateful encounter with the vampire ravn leaves you wishing for a different life. you strike an unexpected deal with the stranger that will soon turn into something more…

pairing: vampire!ravn x reader

side characters: leedo and seoho

genre: vampire!au, angst, romance, humour

warnings: kidnapping, cleithrophobia, manipulation, lies, human trashnaming, blood mentions, stabbing, swearing (like twice)

word count: 2.5k

author’s note: @mariuscheng i deeply apologize, you’ll see why *mwah*

part one 🌙 part two 🌙 part three 🌙 part four 🌙 part five 🌙 part six  🌙 part seven 🌙 part eight 🌙 part nine 🌙 part ten 🌙 part twelve 🌙epilogue

Minutes turned into hours and hours into days. You began to lose track of time. You had no idea how long you’d spent in this terrifying place where Leedo had taken you to. You just wanted to go back home. Not where your parents were, no. That had never felt like home. You wanted to be back in Ravn’s castle, in the safety of his arms. He was the one…well, not person, but rather being who had treasured you and cared for you like nobody else. 

And no matter how hard you tried to convince Leedo that you would never change your mind and love him the way he wanted you to, he just refused to let you go. Which only frustrated you further. You felt like a bird in a cage and that feeling was the worst in the world. You needed to think of a way to escape. But how? These metal bars were so hard. And Leedo never let you out of sight. True, he never physically harmed you or forced you to do anything. 

But the mere fact he had kidnapped you, taken you away from the place you called home was enough of a red flag to change your friendly feelings for him into something that resembled distrust and annoyance. Since you couldn’t find a way to escape, your only hope was that Ravn wouldn’t give up on you. Maybe he would come for you. 

As more days passed by, you realized you were on your own. Harbouring hopes was foolish and would do you no good. You could either die or make peace with your current situation. Or…you could try something else entirely. Something wicked and a bit cruel, but it could work, nonetheless. And since you weren’t in the mood for dying and you weren’t one to give up so easily, you decided to go for it.

“I changed my mind,” you told Leedo one day, the lie coming out easily. “I’m willing to give you a chance. I can try…to love you like you need me to.”

Leedo eyed you suspiciously. He doubted the sincerity of your words. And for a good reason.

“Do you expect me to let you go, then? Just like that?”

Actually, it wouldn’t be such a bad idea. But of course not. You weren’t that stupid.

“Someday, you will,” you responded, attempting to sound absolutely convinced by the validity of your statement. “Give it time.”

A desperate wish for it to be true appeared in Leedo’s stare. Good. Let him dream.

“Really? You’re willing to try?”

“I am if you are,” you lied once more. What’s another one? You’ve come so far…

“What about the vampire you claim you care about?” Leedo reminded you, which briefly troubled you. But you had to play your cards right if you wanted out of here. You had to deceive Leedo successfully in order to go back to the one you truly loved.

“Well, you were right about him. He’s just a cold-skinned bloodsucker. You could be so much better for me,” the words sent pangs of guilt down your spine as you pronounced them. You didn’t mean any of it, of course. But you had to try your best to convince Leedo you did. If you couldn’t escape on your own, you could manipulate him into letting you go. You only hoped that you were good enough an actress to make this work.

“I’m glad you’re finally beginning to see the error of your ways. We could be so good together, you and I.”

You resisted the urge to vomit. He was delusional. But you had to play along.

“Sure, we could. Now, tell me,” you murmured in what you were wishing sounded like a seductive voice, “What does a girl like me have to do to get some fresh air and a bit of sun around here?”

Leedo laughed. He obviously wasn’t as dumb as you’d hoped he’d turn out to be.

“Not yet. But we’ll get there, I promise. I’ve been very patient with you. What’s a couple more weeks?”

Weeks? If you had to spend another night in this godforsaken place, you would die. You had to get out of here soon or you would lose your mind.

“Right,” you attempted not to sound too crestfallen about it. “Well, until then, we could get to know each other better.”

Leedo smiled.

“What do you want to know?”

🌙🌙🌙

Ravn’s POV

As soon as I found Seoho, I told him everything that had happened and begged him to help me find her. I couldn’t live without her and I had no intention of letting her go. He listened to my pleas calmly, without saying a word. When I was finally done, he spoke:

“Of course, I will help you,” Seoho started. “Even though I don’t trust humans…”

“I’m sensing there’s a big but coming.”

“But I’m afraid we might be too late.”

“Too late?” I whispered, immediately panicking. “Is she dead? Did the werewolf do something to her?”

Seoho shook his head in a composed manner.

“That’s not what I meant. Too late as in…she might have betrayed your secret. You could be in danger, Ravn. You don’t want what almost happened to Xion to happen to you, do you?”

“Y/N’s not like that, I swear. She would never do this to me.”

“Alright, then. Do you have something of hers so that I could cast a locating spell?”

I nodded and handed him one of the books I’d gifted her a while ago. She would read from it every night before sleep. I figured it was her most prized possession.

“Shakespeare, huh?” Seoho chuckled. “Okay, just…go sit in the other room, don’t distract me and I’ll call you when I’m ready.”

I agreed, even though it was impossible for me to sit and stay calm in this current predicament. I was losing my mind. I had to find her soon. What if she was hurt? What if…I never got the chance to see her again? The chance to…tell her everything she meant to me…Tell her…

“She’s near the river in that forest of yours. In some sort of…prison cave,” Seoho informed me a while later.

I wasted no time and stormed out of the room without even bothering to thank my best friend. He’d understand, I told myself. But before I could make it outside of his house, Seoho had teleported next to me and grabbed my hand.

“Where do you think you’re going, lad?” he scolded me. “I’m coming with you.”

“I can’t ask you to…risk exposure. I know how much your secret means to you.”

Seoho obviously disagreed with me.

“You’re not asking. I’ll come on my own free will. You’re my best friend, Ravn. If you care about that foolish human, I feel it is my duty to help you out.”

“Seoho, you really don’t have to…”

“No time for arguing,” he shut me up. “And besides, me teleporting us there would be much faster than your vampire speed.”

I laughed wholeheartedly at his sensible observation.

“Lead the way, powerful wizard.”

Before I could blink, we were standing near the river. Closeby, there was indeed a cave that I had never seen before. I had heard rumours of its existence but never laid eyes upon it. So strange…I rushed ahead, eager to save Y/N from whatever torments that…dog had put her through. But before I could do so, Seoho stopped me once again.

“What now?” I complained because of his apparent eagerness to slow me down.

“Before we go in there, there’s something you should now.”

“Just say it already, the tension is killing me,” I groaned.

“Ravn. You’re already dead,” Seoho reminded me.

“Not helping, Seoho,” I sighed.

“Okay, okay, sorry. Y/N must be nearby so I…heard a fraction of her memories. She had just told that werewolf something very disturbing about you. I’m not sure I can even say it, it’s too vile.”

“Just go ahead,” I rolled my eyes. What could possibly be worse than losing her?

“She said and I quote here, so please, don’t get mad at the messenger ‘He’s just a cold-skinned bloodsucker. You could be so much better for me.’ Listen, man, it’s highly possible that her and the werewolf have been working against you. I told you that humans can’t be trusted!”

I shook my head, refusing to believe him.

“No, that can’t be true. Are you sure you heard it correctly? It must have been the wind or…”

Seoho, however, was determined that she had, in fact said that.

“I’m telling you, it’s best we get out of here. It could be a trap. We don’t know what we’re walking into, Ravn! Humans are such wicked creatures, it’s not safe.”

“No, no,” I repeated helplessly. “I can’t just leave her here. I love her, okay? And even if she doesn’t love me back, even if she did say these things about me, I still can’t let anything happen to her.”

Seoho scoffed in disbelief.

“It’s your funeral, mate.”

I shrugged.

“Like you said earlier. I’m already dead.”

I hurried towards the entrance of the cave.

“Then I’d rather die by your side than just stand outside like a coward!” Seoho yelled right behind me.

“If you’re scared for your life, you don’t have to come in. I won’t blame you, I’ll understand,” I reassured my friend.

“I’m not scared for my life. It’s you I’m worried about,” Seoho replied.

“While I’m sincerely touched,” I squeezed his arm. “I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”

“Not against a werewolf, you’re not. Dumbass,” he added that last part affectionately.

“Well, two dumb brains are always better than one,” I joked and the two of us went inside.

🌙🌙🌙

Reader’s POV

This shit wasn’t working. You were being so nice and pliable to Leedo and he still hadn’t let you go! Ugh, men! You wanted out so badly but you couldn’t risk being too forthright about it or it would ruin all the careful planning, all the progress you’d been making so far. Just a few more days, you kept telling myself. Just a few more and he’d believe you. You had to be strong enough to continue with the lies, with the whole acting scheme. They would be successful. Or you didn’t know what you’d do with yourself. You missed everything so badly. You missed holding Ravn’s hand. You missed reading books in his big…library. You missed making flower crowns for him. You even missed him drinking your blood. To think that the one time you’d found a home for yourself…only to have it taken away from you so cruelly. It was really unfair. You had never before been in a situation where you had to deceive someone on purpose. You had never wished ill upon anyone. So, for whatever crimes you were being punished, you couldn’t help but get frustrated by the injustice of it all. Just when you were getting entirely lost in the memories, Leedo interrupted your thoughts.

“You know…I was thinking we could have a walk. I won’t let you out of my sight, so don’t try anything stupid.”

Was this actually happening? Or were you dreaming?

“Of course not. I told you already. I changed my mind.”

“Good,” Leedo gave you an encouraging smile, which you desperately wanted to wipe off his smug face. No sooner had he unlocked the metal door leading to the outside world, to the light, to freedom, than you heard unexpected noises coming from somewhere nearby. Was it possible? Had he really come for you?

Seconds later, you were greeted by a heavenly sight. Ravn and Seoho were only a couple of metres away from you. Never before had you felt so grateful to see such familiar faces! You immediately forgot all about your plan to deceive Leedo and rushed into Ravn’s arms. He let you hold him but didn’t say a word, simply welcoming you silently. But why? You had missed the sound of his voice.

“It was a trick, wasn’t it?” Leedo finally realized. “You never loved me, you just said all these things so I’d let you go, didn’t you?”

You gulped nervously and even though you didn’t want to leave the comfort of Ravn’s arms, you felt like you had to confront Leedo yourself.

“Yes, it was all a lie. I never meant any of it,” you confessed.

Ravn gave Seoho a pointed look, which at the time, you didn’t understand.

“Well, I don’t care. If I can’t have you, then neither can he,” Leedo attacked Ravn before you could register what was happening. You wished you could do something other than beg them to stop, but you were so scared that you could barely move. They were going to kill each other right in front of you and you were too frozen to think. Luckily, Seoho’s reflexes worked faster than yours. He hurriedly got between them, trying to make them stop. However, before he could do so, Leedo accidentally pierced him in the stomach with a blade that had somehow appeared from thin air and Seoho stumbled onto the ground. You ran to his side and knelt down next to the magician.

“Oh, God, are you okay?” you asked.

Seoho nodded weakly.

“I didn’t mean to stab him,” Leedo defended himself. “I meant to kill the bloodsucker!”

“Oh, right, ‘cause that makes us all feel so much better!” you hissed sarcastically.

“Just…stop fighting and ask the girl who she wants to be with, you imbeciles!” Seoho murmured before passing out.

“Shit,” you and Ravn swore simultaneously, desperately trying to help Seoho regain consciousness.

“You didn’t answer the question,” Leedo pointed out.

“Is that really your biggest concern right now?” you snapped at him. “Seoho could literally die because of you!”

Leedo looked away as if it wasn’t any of his concern. That bastard…

“I want to stay with Ravn and help Seoho, in case it wasn’t obvious,” you spelled it out.

Leedo nodded and started walking away wordlessly. In the meantime, you were pressing your hand against Seoho’s wound so that he wouldn’t die from the blood loss.

“If I ever see you again, I will kill you,” Ravn vowed, giving Leedo an icy glare.

“Likewise,” Leedo roared and left you all in that damn cave.

Once he was out of earshot, you noticed Ravn slowly backing away from Seoho.

“There’s so much blood,” he panted weakly.

“Fuck, I almost forgot,” you were worried for a second that Ravn would lose control. Despite the fact that Seoho was his best friend, it was only natural that he was disturbed by the smell and look of it.

“I don’t want to hurt him,” Ravn closed his eyes, pained and ashamed to admit that he was so easily affected.

“You won’t. You should get out of here and bring me supplies from your castle. Herbs, medicine, anything you can find,” you sensibly suggested. “It’s my fault he got hurt in the first place. If it hadn’t been for my friendship with Leedo, none of this would have happened,” you couldn’t help but blame yourself for it all.

“It’s not your fault you see the good in people. And…I’ll do what you asked. We’ll talk more when I return, promise.”

You nodded.

“I’ll stay with Seoho and try to stop the bleeding.”

“Thank you,” Ravn said and ran outside at the speed of light.

To be continued…

[wicked-game-black-butler]

Lithium

Tick. Tock.

The room descended into a midnight blue, the golden rays of the sun having chased their way out of the study some time ago. Dying embers crackled in the hearth where a large wingback chair was tucked close to the mosaic lined fireplace. It was cold. The frigid, numbing tendrils of winter’s dusk slowly crept into the grand room. But Ciel did not move from his seat to stir the embers back to life. He did not call for Sebastian for a blanket. A blanket wouldn’t help. Ciel was always cold.

Tick. Tock.

He cast a scathing glare at the clock which sat above the mantle. The vexing machine still marched on, just as he did, with automatic purpose- to document the passing of time. Time. It was a cruel thing. It took from all, ever hungry. Heartless. Unfeeling. Insatiable. Everything he had striven to be. But even the great Earl Phantomhive was not immune to time, just like he was not immune to the feelings he had so desperately tried to deny. And as it carried on, it had taken from him as it did all things until he was left an echoing husk. Empty.

Tick. Tock.

With a heavy sigh he rose from the leather chair, his joints aching from sitting for so long. His fingers reached toward the ceiling as he stretched his petit frame. Casting the mocking instrument one last condemning glance before leaving the room and stepping into the dark hall. Sebastian would be venturing up soon to inform him that dinner was prepared in the dining room, but Ciel couldn’t be bothered. He wasn’t hungry. Nothing could satisfy the gaping void which had made its home inside him. 

Tick. Tock.

His eyes ached as he ventured down the dimly lit hallway, the only light from the deepening shades of twilight. Sebastian. Now he was a creature who was kin to time. He was just as heartless, as unfeeling, and as ravenously insatiable. Just as Ciel’s revenge had been. How he wished his vengeance would be fulfilled. Hadn’t it taken enough? Would such a hollow victory be worth everything he’d had to offer in return? There had been a time when he had thought it was. But that was when the manor was filled with warmth, light, laughter, and the love of his remaining family and devoted servants and friends. Now it was nothing but cold darkness. The rooms which were once kept with pristine care had, according to his order, fallen into disrepair. Dust and cobwebs were now their greatest adornment. And the halls which were once pathways, like veins, directing the life that resided within, were only haunted with the ghosts of those who had once traveled them.

Tick. Tock.

The sun had fully set by the time he made it to his chambers. Though that was no issue- he could navigate the sparsely furnished room even in the consuming darkness. His hand ran along the soft down duvet, the mattress giving ever so slightly under his weight as he sat on the side of his bed. Even now the balls of his feet barely grazed across the cold, smooth surface of the wood floor. In all this time not much had really changed, yet everything was completely different. Suffocating silence descended on him, the gaping maw of its soundless scream deafening and his chest tightened. Nights were always the most difficult, when his loneliness was most acute. For when he was surrounded by the blinding, oppressive cloak of darkness he found his vision most clear. He was alone. Yes, terribly alone. In the night. In the dark.

Tick. Tock.

He had known Sebastian was there before he announced himself, had felt the pull of the demon’s presence before he had set foot into the room. Ciel squinted, a jabbing pain shooting through his temple as, with a snap of the butler’s fingers, a healthy, roaring fire sprang to life in the hearth, a fresh flame dancing atop the candles of the candelabra which sat on his bedside table. Sebastian always brought warmth.

“My lord.” Sebastian said quietly, “You are in bed.”

“I am.”

Ciel did not look when the demon soundlessly made his way to the corner of his bed.

“But you have not taken your dinner.”

“I’m not hungry.”

Silence.

“My lord.”

His call was barely a whisper, but the tenderness in that honeyed tone made his heart ache painfully. Without thinking, he desperately grasped a handful of his shirt and took a shuddering breath, twisting the pressed fabric as if that alone would seal the weeping cracks of his heart.

“My lord.” the whispering call came again and Ciel looked up in time to see Sebastian kneel before him, “Your hands are cold.”

With gentle movements, Sebastian pried his fingers from his shirt, taking the Earl’s hands in his own. Ciel sighed at the contact- skin on skin- and closed his eyes, relishing in the warmth of Sebastian’s touch. Both had stripped off the charade some time ago- Ciel his eyepatch and Sebastian his gloves. There was no need to hide any longer. There was no one left to see.

A sob sat at the back of his throat, tears burning his eyes beneath closed lids, as the demon wrung his master’s hands with his own, his fingers prickling with discomfort with the return of feeling. Only Sebastian could bring back feeling.

“My lord.” 

The third call fell from his servant’s lips and Ciel opened his eyes, a few stray tears escaping from his mismatched gaze. Before him Sebastian still knelt, his expression calm and neutral as always, though his crimson eyes were lit with hungry curiosity.

“Is there anything I can do to help you?”

Ciel paused at the question, knowing full well what the demon meant. There was only one thing which could make him feel, could lift him above the drowning waters of nothingness. Something that satisfied more than any cake, more intoxicating than any of Lau’s drugs. Sebastian.

“Yes.” he answered quietly, yet firmly, “Sebastian, please. Make me forget.”

Tick. Tock.

Sighs and groans filled the room. Sweat glistened off alabaster skin. The air was thick and heady with desire. The bed, which had been neatly made but a half hour ago was a wrinkled mess, blankets strewn about from the passionate, undulating movements of the two men. For every cry of Sebastian’s name, he answered in kind. Every touch, every thrust was like fire in his veins- all consuming.

Ciel rocked back against Sebastian as he buried himself deep inside his master, the electric current of pleasure traveling from his cock and up his spine, his back arching from the sensation. His face pressed against his pillow, which was wet from spit and tears, losing himself in the brief refuge of this blissful moment. In this moment there was no empty manor, no dead loved ones, no revenge. Only the burning of desire, the intoxicating pleasure, the stretch, the fullness, the pain. Sebastian.

Tick. Tock.

The candles still flickered with the same healthy light they had an hour ago. Ciel watched the dancing flames, laying on his back, naked, his cheeks flushed, and his eyes drooping with satisfaction. His body was spent, but in its wake something vaguely resembling contentment rested in his chest, however short lived it might be. 

The bed shifted as Sebastian rose and Ciel’s gaze roamed the demon’s form, memorizing every dip and curve of shapely muscle before, with a flourish of his hand, his butler’s uniform materialized and enveloped his frame. Once properly dressed, he turned on his heel to face his reclining master.

“Is there any more I can do for you, my lord?”

And there it was- the professionalism, the indifference. With one question the facade shattered and, with a wrenching twist of his heart, Ciel was plunged back into his melancholy. Sebastian did not care. The pleasure he derived from him was no more than what the butler could extract from a common whore. Sex was a duty, part of his service to his mature master, and nothing more.

He turned his attention away from the other man and fixed his gaze on the canopy of his four-poster bed, the tendrils of numbness already beginning to spread out from his heart to take hold in other parts of his body.

He had asked Sebastian once, if revenge was always so lonely. After chiding him for his odd display of sentimentality, his tone became more serious and he answered that he could not be sure. Given he had no capacity to love, he had no grasp on what loneliness might feel like. Though he had heard the same sentiments from some of his previous masters and human literature seemed to reflect the same, providing a new twist to the phrase “revenge is a meal best served cold”.

Sebastian waited, ever patient, for his master’s command. Ciel closed his eyes, the welcome, ebbing lull of exhaustion moving him closer to longed for unconsciousness. With each breath, silence pressed in on him, the only sound which dared to defy the consuming void was that of the steady ticking of the clock, both constant and mocking. It sneered at his suffering, cruelly reminding the Earl it would continue on- with or without him. And how Ciel longed it would be the latter.

“Leave. And take the clock with you, too.” he commanded, not bothering to open his eyes. 

“Yes, my lord.” 

Ciel remained still, chest rising and falling with each second. And, though he could not see Sebastian, he could feel him as he moved about the room. The candelabra was extinguished. The fire was stoked. The only other sign Sebastian had left was the soft click of the door as it closed behind him.

The tears flowed freely now- silent, a welling sorrow breaking free from his chest in the butler’s absence. He turned, burying his face in the pillow to drown out the strangled sobs that fought to slip from his lips and cupped the sides up to cover his ears. For, though he was sure Sebastian had carried the clock from his chambers, he could still hear the steady rhythm in his mind- cruel and taunting. 

And, in that moment, the realization of his solitude crushed him. He was so terribly alone- in the night, in the dark.

Tick. Tock.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This is a submission for @griever-bit-my-finger‘s SebaCiel song event, for the day for Sad Songs. It was inspired by Lithium by Evanescence and Still Here by Digital Daggers.