#unknown the series episode 10

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Episode 10: The Couch

Wow @lurkingshan, it’s like you really know me! This scene is exactly what I was going to talk about for Episode 10 because the fucking TENSION put so much weight in to the air when I was watching that I could hardly breathe. 

CHRIS CHIU

THE ACTOR THAT YOU ARE

Scene Breakdown time!

First of all, I love the little couple dynamic moments we get between Lili and San Pang, where Lili has to tap San Pang in to Yuan and Qian’s fight. San Pang arrives and in a very strategic move informed by knowing Qian and Yuan for a significant amount of their lives, he arrives with food he knows will go over well with Qian and will test Yuan’s ears (he comes down the stairs from his room to throw the food away after all). 

Which, let’s just acknowledge that when Yuan comes downstairs and takes all the alcohol and greasy food away, the moment Yuan approaches the coffee table, Qian looks back towards the TV screen pretending he is disinterested in the situation at hand. But his eyes give him away because he keeps glancing at Yuan when he thinks he can steal a second. And stealing is what he is trying to do because he keeps his head pointed directly towards the television, while looking for half a second at Yuan out of the corner of his eye when Yuan leans over to collect the food. After that moment, Qian does not look towards Yuan again until Yuan has turned around and Qian can stare at his back. 

It must be said. Chris is a phenomenal actor, because even without seeing his face, just the top of his head, you can kind of tell the mood that Qian is in as Yuan walks away, because he turns towards Yuan. We see Yuan look in Qian’s direction, Qian moves his head further back to look at San Pang, then looks away shaking his head. I acknowledge I’m probably reading too much in to it, but I can feel the incredulity radiating off of that head shake. 

Yuan heads up the stairs, and Qian looks towards the staircase only after Yuan has disappeared. His head movement is so much more obvious than his previous motions that it literally looks like Qian is breaking character, or like he was previously frozen and had only now been allowed to breathe. Qian’s eyes look up towards the staircase (towards Yuan’s absence), then downward as he thinks about his next move, then back towards San Pang, then down once more as he makes a decision about whether or not he wants to Start The Conversation. 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul (my savior)

Qian here is trying to check that Yuan is out of earshot because he Will Not have the The Conversation about His Feelings if there is a chance that Yuan will know about it. 

With the heaviest of sighs, Qian gives San Pang an opening: “Did you buy those for me, or for him to throw away?”  Qian asks, and once again looks out of the corner of his eye, getting serious “Or for him to throw away?” 

And there is no doubt in my mind that it is the latter. San Pang bringing food that would trigger Yuan’s care instincts towards Qian, cause Yuan to intervene, and San Pang to bear witness to the tense and angry energy from Yuan towards Qian and force the issue. I think it’s partially why Qian does not deliberate for long in starting the conversation despite his hesitancy. 

San Pang scoffs and says in response “He wouldn’t have done that if he didn’t care about you. Xiao Yuan can’t bear to leave you alone.” holds up the salad as a physical example of the care that Yuan has for Qian. 

gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Qian gives another giant exhale and looks contemplative. Something that I do find really important in good acting is the use of internal monologue. Qian always has something on his mind that he is sitting with. And the benefit of a scene like this is that the production team, and the camera trust the strength of their actors to hold the silence that settles over the room as Chris runs the gambit of Qian’s internal thoughts. 

Qian is well and truly sitting with the acknowledgement of Yuan’s feelings from San Pang. Maybe I am wrong because I am not an actor, but I do not have the kind of intentional and conscious control over my face to have the kinds of lip twitches that Chris has when Qian is thinking about Yuan’s care for him. They may have twenty seconds of silence on screen, but that does not mean the scene isn’t still in motion. There are so many little things happening in the span between San Pang’s comment about Yuan and his next reflection on sending Yuan away. 

“Xiao Yuan can’t bear to leave you alone,” Qian turns that over in his mind, to me it’s like he’s feeling the weight of it on his tongue, in his body. Qian looks up, and then around, and tosses the remote to the side, breathes heavily again. That feels like a begrudging acceptance of the statement. At the very least it is permission from Qian to proceed with the difficult conversation. 

“Before I had Yuan leave the country, I had been thinking I was doing the right thing for you two. But seriously, be honest, did you feel empty when Yuan was away?”

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Qian blinks twice and we cut to a flashback of a lovely little isolated frame of Qian feeling Yuan’s absence. We cut back to a close up of Qian’s face and his lip twitches. Which I love because it feels like an involuntary admission. We know Qian, we know that boy is stubborn and stoic, that he muscles through all the pain, that he does not let many people see his weaknesses. San Pang asks Qian if he felt empty and Qian does. not. move. He holds exactly the same position, lounging on the couch with his hand behind his head like he is unmoved, unaffected by San Pang’s question. But that little twitch of his lip gives him away. San Pang has struck a nerve. San Pang has forced Qian to hold a spotlight to the feelings he’s been trying to numb for the last four years. 

“Let me tell you something. When Lili and I first got together,” 

I don’t know about anyone else, but I snorted at the way Qian turned his head to look at San Pang in warning. We still have not seen Qian approve of that relationship. And San Pang knows that he’s staring at the precipice of some truly hot water, which is why he follows up with a “hear me out.” 

Qian relaxes and once again turns to look away from San Pang. From San Pang’s position very little of Qian’s face is visible. So Qian keeps holding a position that will give San Pang as little of a chance of reading him as possible. 

“I’ve struggled too. I…I always wondered what happiness could I bring her? Was I doing the right thing? How could I face you? And then…I felt it wasn’t right. Life is too short.”

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Again, I just have to say. CHRIS CHIU IS A PHENOMENAL ACTOR. He does not move a muscle, but you know Qian is locked in on what San Pang is saying because of how he moves his eyes. When San Pang says “life is too short” you can actually see the moment where Qian starts paying more attention to San Pang’s words, because he looks away from the TV and more downward in thought. 

“Getting hung up over it for years, would it be worth all the lost time?” 

Chris changes how he breathes here. You can see Qian take in a deep breath, but he holds it for a few seconds, he lets his nostrils flare, and then you see a large release of breath in the movement of Qian’s chest. This is really really getting to Qian. That nostril flare was not because he was breathing in. Because he’d already taken a breath. It was not because he was breathing out, because we see that happen a few seconds after the nostril flare, without his nose moving again. When Qian flares his nostrils, he is holding his breath, for a rather noticeable amount of time too. 

I love Chris because he embodies Qian so well, I can almost feel the way Qian is feeling internally in all the subtle little ways Chris plays with how Qian holds and releases tension and attention. 

“Who’s been good to me?”

Qian blinks twice, letting the question hit him, and only then does he finally release his breath. 

“Who put me before themselves?” 

San Pang looks at Qian after he finishes asking these hypothetical questions. But Qian is still looking ahead towards the TV, trying to come across as disengaged in the conversation as possible. And San Pang notices that, and that is why he continues to talk. Because Qian is hearing him, he’s listening and processing, but he isn’t engaged. He hasn’t put his body in to the conversation yet, he hasn’t responded to anything that San Pang has said to him. So San Pang keeps pushing. 

“A lot of things are only between you and Yuan. Unless you really have something against being with a guy, Yuan’s the only one who will be by your side, no matter what. Are you really not going to confront it?”

And I love that we pull away from that question to Qian looking like he is lying in a therapist’s chair. And Qian holds that position he has been maintaining throughout the conversation for a few seconds longer. The number of times he blinks the only indication that what San Pang has said is getting through and that Qian is mulling it all over. 

And only then, after San Pang has said all these things about Qian and Yuan’s relationship, in a way that is not judgemental or against the idea of these brothers becoming romantically involved. Only after San Pang has said that Yuan would be by Qian’s side no matter what does Qian set his jaw and push himself up in to a sitting position to continue the conversation. 

San Pang does not know what happened at Le’s gang beyond them being beaten up. So while it is highly likely that he is aware saying that Yuan would follow Qian anywhere is opening a can of worms, he does not understand how much ammunition he has just given Qian to talk about the danger that loving him too deeply has put Yuan in.

We do not give enough credit to film actors for maintaining continuity across scenes, because this man sits up and the first thing Chris has Qian do is massage the back of his head, where the pain of his blood clot sits. I could probably sit here all day trying to talk about all the little facial expressions he does as Qian sits up and starts preparing himself to be vulnerable with San Pang. But we can leave it as merely that. Qian is getting ready to talk to San Pang about some deeply personal stuff.

Personal stuff that Qian usually does not typically get in to. Like, San Pang says he knows what Qian went through, but I do not think he does. I do not think Qian has told him about the sexual assault, or San Pang would not have been trying to throw women at Qian. 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

“San Pang.” He pauses, and you can see the way he is still noodling, thinking about whether or not he wants to talk to San Pang about all this. And notably, he does not meet San Pang’s eye when he begins “Do you know…” Qian looks to the side, he frowns a little bit, he taps the palm of his hand against the top of the couch arm. It feels so childish and small of him in a way that really struck me. Qian is nervous, he is redirecting that energy in to his motions. In to the tapping, in to looking away, in to not having to reveal deep personal truths sitting that close to another soul. “Do you know what my biggest wish in life is? My biggest wish in life is for them to be happy,” 

Ohhhhhh how that breaks my heart. Qian has suffered so much, he has done so much, he has survived so much. If you were to ask me, I would bet that Qian has never been happy. He was forced at a very young age to take over the role of caregiver. He is both a brother and a father to Yuan and to Lili. And it is a testament to Qian’s love for his family, and the pain he is willing to put himself through that Lili is so bright and vibrant and naive about some of the workings of the world. I believe that Lili is happy. I believe that Qian has succeeded in at least that much. But that is not something he has had a chance to do. “Even if the world comes down, I’ll hold it up.” I have not forgotten that line from last episode. Qian would hold the world together if it meant ensuring his sister’s happiness. 

I do not know what it is, but there is something in the way Chris moves his mouth after he says “My biggest wish in life is for them to be happy,” that just absolutely destroys me, because he makes himself look like this is such a huge confession. 

“Mine is the same.” 

gif from @wanderlust-in-my-soul

“I just want them to grow up healthy and happy, because I’m their big brother.” Qian’s words become so breathy and he’s jabbing his finger straight in to the arm of the couch to drive home his point. These are the words that matter, this is the wish that matters. Qian’s feelings, Qian’s happiness have nothing to do with it. If he’s empty so be it, as long as his siblings are happy and healthy he will wound himself a thousand times over. His fucking face here, once again is just…When Qian takes in a breath, it is shaky. You can tell by the movement of his jaw, which looks like it is moving from side to side a little bit. As he approaches the end of his sentence, it feels like he is trying not to cry. 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Yuan’s life might be summed up in two words: Wei Qian 

But Wei Qian’s life is summed up in five: 

Because I’m their big brother. 

“We grew up together. You think I don’t know how hard life’s been on you? But you know that Yuan’s feelings for you are different.” 

Qian looks away incredulously, and there is something else there too, I think. Something in the way that Qian’s eyebrows furrow, the way his mouth hangs open, the way he breathes out. I don’t know that he can really believe that this conversation is happening right now. That San Pang would let these words reach the light of day, that he would acknowledge them so openly, so matter-of-factly. 

“We’ve tried everything. We even sent him abroad for years. You were miserable every day. You love him and he loves you.”

We get more of Qian’s thinking face here as San Pang says these words, his mouth agape, his breath quickening, his eyes moving back and forth as he sorts through his own thoughts. 

But I need to acknowledge San Pang. He has such an intriguing connection to Qian and his family. San Pang has power of Qian, because his parents are Qian’s landlords. He and Qian have been best friends for a very long time, and even though I think it is true that San Pang likely knows the most about Qian’s life history, he does not know it all. He is still, in many facets of his life, acting like a kicked dog and backing down every time he tries to push back against Qian now that Qian knows that he and Lili are together. But when push comes to shove. When Qian’s happiness is impeded, when Qian’s health is at risk, he will tell Qian what Qian needs to hear. 

Whether or not Qian is truly having a hard time parsing through his feelings for Yuan doesn’t matter to me as much as Qian getting permission from multiple people to actually pursue the relationship. In acknowledging all of this, San Pang, the man who at one point told Yuan he could like anyone but Qian, the man that sent Yuan away for four years, is telling Qian that it is okay for Qian and Yuan to be together. He is the external judge that is finally accepting this taboo relationship, because he knows that if he does not show Qian that it is okay for him and Yuan to change from brothers to lovers, that neither Qian or Yuan will have any chance in hell of long term happiness. 

“Even if you’re not together, he’ll be sad to see you sad.” 

Off come Qian’s glasses. Shit is getting serious now. Qian rests his head on his hand, he looks away from San Pang. He really sits with it, you can see the emotions rising up in him, in the way he breathes, in the way his nostrils move, in the way his lips tremble for a second before he speaks. 

gif by @ueasking

“I’m scared, you know?” he turns to look at San Pang, and he sucks in a huge breath through his nose. It’s the first time we’ve seen him breathe so obviously that way throughout the entire scene. GOD, QIAN KILLS ME. 

“You haven’t even tried. What are you scared of?” 

And this is the fascinating thing for me, right? Outside of Yuan, San Pang is Qian’s best friend, but they do not have conversations like this that often. San Pang has tried time and again to start the more serious conversations, to act as an emotional support for Qian, but Qian brushes those conversations off as much as he can. San Pang knew the medical issues, he knows the history, he knows about the pieces of Qian’s life that Qian can’t hide. But he does not know everything, Qian does not usually let himself be this vulnerable with San Pang, hell he hasn’t even told San Pang everything that happened with Le’s gang. He’s about to, but that is only because he is trying to make a point. 

I think he is only having this conversation with San Pang, only admitting he is scared, and confused about his feelings for Yuan because he has literally no one else to talk to about it, and he’s starting to break down to the point that he can’t hold it all in by himself. And San Pang keeps pushing. 

“You know he went to find Le by himself that day?”

“I know.” 

“He was surrounded and beaten by six people, and in the end…”

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

He sucks in a breath. It takes him a moment to find the strength to form the words, so he forms a gun shape with his hand, which he points quickly a few times to fill the silence and the stillness in the room as he finds the shape of the admission on his tongue. He accentuates the severity of the memory with one final large motion. 

“...they pointed a gun at…” 

Ah, and there it is. The real reason behind Qian’s comment about wanting Lili and Yuan to be happy and healthy because he’s their big brother. Qian will not act on his feelings for Yuan, especially not right now because he is feeling guilty. Not just for sending Yuan away, not just because of the letter, but because Yuan’s unwavering loyalty, protectiveness, and love for Qian got Yuan hurt. Nearly got Yuan killed. Again. 

Qian’s whole world, his entire drive was shattered the day Yuan confessed, when Yuan told Qian that he was suffering. Yuan’s love for Qian was hurting him. But Qian just wants Yuan to be happy and healthy. The chance at having that world again was nearly destroyed with the realization that Yuan almost died abroad. His world was made complete again when Yuan returned home. And it was very nearly destroyed once more when Yuan walked in to that gang in hopes of protecting Qian. 

There is pain in witnessing the kind of love someone would die for. 

Qian can put himself in danger for the sake of his siblings, because from my perspective, Qian never thought his life had much worth. His formative years were filled with horrific abuse, assault under the guise of love, pain, suffering, doing terrible things just to survive. But this is all because he cannot see the forest through the trees, of the life that he has built, of the home that he has built, of the safety that he has built for his siblings. 

Yuan is not allowed to believe his life is less important than Qian’s because no one has ever thought that Qian’s life was more important than theirs. 

“Fuck, you- you’re telling me that now? Then, you…Right now, you…So, you’ve lost…”

Another quick shout out to San Pang, and moreso to the writing for San Pang that they don’t always let him have these brilliant speeches. He was able to navigate the beginning of this conversation because he knew mostly what he was walking in to, but with the reveal of Yuan and Qian’s near death experience, he is fumbling. 

The camera cuts back to Qian. I’d say Qian is listening to San Pang, but not fully present. Chris is doing so many things with his face in that moment. His nostrils are flaring, his lips are tightening like he’s trying to hold something back, he’s rocking his jaw from side to side. 

gif by @ueasking

“So, this isn’t a decision I can make so lightly.” He is almost crying now, he won’t cry, I think the only time we’ve seen him cry is when he was staring the prospect of Yuan’s death directly in the face during Russian Roulette and when he was hugging Yuan afterwards. But you can see the growing frustration and the threat of the tears very clearly on his face. Qian emphasizes the statement by once again jabbing his finger into the couch. 

“I have to consider the future.”  

“Do you want him to have a future without you?”

Let me tell y’all the way I collapsed under the weight of that question…it is no wonder Qian, notoriously quiet Qian, immediately shuts his mouth. I appreciate how much San Pang is willing to be the sacrificial lamb, because that is exactly the question that Qian needed to hear. That is exactly the reality that Qian, Yuan, Lili all face if Qian does not get his blood clot treated. A future without Qian in it. 

Qian needs to know exactly what he is doing to the people he loves by continuing to delay this medical treatment, but San Pang had to know that in asking it, it would only make Qian retreat back in to himself. Which is what Qian usually does. It was a miracle in it’s own right that San Pang was able to get Qian to voice this many of his concerns, to tell him the entire truth, to talk to him about the fear. 

gif by @ueasking

Qian closes his eyes, he lets the blow of the question absorb in to him, and he nods his head. Which, in my opinion, is a brilliant choice because the way he nods does not read to me as a confession that yes, Qian does want Yuan to have a future without him in it, and more so is an admission of defeat from Qian. But because we don’t get verbal confirmation either way, we do not, San Pang does not, Yuan does not get any confirmation one way or the other about what Qian is thinking. 

Qian just nods, lets the silence hang one moment longer, and kicks San Pang out. 

“Go home.” He says. But there is a more promising follow up “Let me think about it.” 

Which feels like the only thing Qian has really been doing for the last four years, but we’ve already established, that boy is about as moveable as a brick wall, and he and Yuan both serve to lose a lot if this goes wrong. 

And there you go @lurkingshan! 4103 words on the mouth twitch, nervous body language, and tears in this scene :D

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Lots of lovely kisses & an unwarranted upset in the standings

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Oct 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Fourever You (Thai Thurs YT) ep 2 of 16 - Yes yes J&J should be first but I am weak in the face of, well, frankly this man's face:

Pond = greatest piner in a dog’s age. The yearning in that boy’s eyes is obscene, it’s like the most explicit sex that only he can see and we’re just voyeurs.

Thus I continue to adore this stupid show and everything it stands for. No notes. May the fluff continue eternal.

Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) ep 5 of 12 - Everyone is so skilled in this show, but War is truly glorious. Considering the pacing, I think we are probably in for some long periods of darkness, suffering, and pain soon. I’m not mad about that prospect, it’s earned and foreshadowed, I just thought I’d lay it out there.

Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 6 of 12 - More boys from GMMTV with good communication. Who knew? Min has SUCH a white knight complex. NO SINGING. Good demanding kiss, though. Well, Ohm can handle anything. 

Meanwhile, this really is a bodyguard romance under another name. And I kinda wanna rewatch Never Let Me Go as a result.

Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sun iQIYI) ep 4 of 15 - Earn remains best boy and my favorite character. Phun is v jelly, as he should be. AND I like Ohm & N'Mik better in this version. I still prefer the original leads, but I’m enjoying this enough. 

I had no idea how much I missed Gunsmile! It’s so nice to see him on my screen again.

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) ep 12 fin - I hate Diew’s mom. Hate her. So much. She may be my least favorite mom ever in BL. That’s saying a lot. No I don’t think she was redeemed. 

Conclusion

Adapted from the novel Godzilla Next Door by Jiwinil about an introvert who lives mostly in his room, until a loud annoying extrovert moves in next door. This was one of my top picks for 2024 and I’m delighted to say it satisfied expectations. A charmingly serene story of opposites attract, that featured good communication, patience, and genuine affection used to build a solid relationship.(I’m particularly delighted that our musician is a drummer and I don’t have to listen to him sing.) Yes it’s a tad slow but it’s very earnest and leans into the kind of sweetness that Thai BL does best. Doesn’t hurt that this starred an actor (Big) that many of us have been hoping would get a lead for years. I was pleased and comforted. This is not a kind of BL that suits everybody, but it suited me admirably. 8/10 

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 10 of 12 - Ozone and the Ice Prince (name still unknown) did their little dance. What an earnest and romantic confession from our Icy man. I literally said “no no no just kiss, no foreheads.” And it was a great crying kiss, my favorite. Honestly, that amount of emotion hadn’t been earned by this pair, but I don’t mind. I could watch a whole show just about them. Also woah! Major nekid on YT?

Thailand......

Risking demonetization for arse…...

I guess we’ve all been there. 

Where was I?

I’m happy with this episode since it was mostly my side couple. But the distribution of main couple and side couple and the focus of each episode is wildly erratic with this show. It’s very odd. (And let's be clear we ordered errotic not erratic.)

Every You Every Me (Thai Mon Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - Jade and Chin have lived over a thousand lifetimes. In each one they somehow manage to fall in love with each other. (This pair, TopMick was piloted in a My Universe ep, that was one of the only ones I liked.) Soulmate premise is a mix of Color Rush and La Pluie. Frankly, this isn’t as good as either, but it’s enjoyable in a slow cheerful way. Especially if you like this particular set of tropes. It’s quietly lovely and I like the leads. Sunshine is very very sunshine and our tsundere is a grumpy mysterious nerd. Trigger for domestic abuse. It looks like each episode is gonna be a completely different meet cute with the same pairing. It’s more linked vignettes than any overarching story. So if you don’t like this pair, you won’t like this series.

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 9 of 10 - More sports day. (Everybody’s doing sports days right now.) Random sides kissing. Where did the glasses person come from? Was he introduced and I forgot about it? Oh that’s the evil cousin! Okay… anygay. Sides randomly flip-flop who they like and I don’t know what the fuck is going on. This show. I swear. Ooo caught kissing. And… killed? What a mind fuck of a soap opera. Honestly, I’m fine if he’s dead, I don’t care at this point I just feel jerked around. 

For some reason no eng sub for me for the first half. So I watched with Spanish subs (which is about as good as my Thai, only for different words). What a wild experience.

Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Oh dear. I just can’t imagine ever rooting for this couple. Which means… Why am I watching this? 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

My Damn Business (Korea Sat YT) eps 1-2 of 7 - Oh I love it. Casual flirty westernized-style boss. Reserved reluctant cutie (yes we’ve seen the actor before). Is it disgusting workplace harassment? Oh most certainly. Do I enjoy it anyway? Yep, I’m warped. No defense, but at least it’s something from Korea. 

Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 3 of ? - I like the lead being bullied and pushed to his limit thus turning into a psychopath. It’s gonna be a fun ride if it really goes Devil Judge just teens and actually gay. I wonder if it has the strength of its convictions? 

Our Golden Times (Hong Kong YT) 5 fin? - I guess that is the reunion? What an odd little piece. I’m not entirely sure what I feel about it except that this feels more BL than anything Hong Kong has given us so far (which isn't much). The subs are truly terrible. Since I speak absolutely zero Cantonese I can’t really fix them in my brain. I thought this was the final ep but then a teaser for ep 6 dropped so I we have at least one more. 

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) ep 10 of 12 - It was a nice, if entirely unearned reunion. And the leads do kiss beautifully. Trust Taiwan. I am so glad that Orca is back! There was even a little language play flip-flopping just for me. Very cute. Also GREAT kissing. How long have we been waiting for Thailand and Taiwan to kiss? 

Eccentric Romance (Korea Weds Viki) eps 1-2 of 12 - Silkwood’s 2nd Thai/Korean colab. This has been in production since 2022 which is a LONG time in the BL world (worrying). But I like the concept: friends of 10 years who’ve been hiding feelings for each other enter the same university. Plus MURDER. Stars Yoon Jun Won (The Man BLK) and Thai actor Save Saisawat (Ai Long Nhai). I begin to think every The Man BLK member will eventually lead out a BL at this point.

It’s enjoyable in a weird way. Grumpy (hottie with a crush) + sunshine (captain oblivious). I gotta say, since this is the second relationship dual lingo style in our BL rn that it’s ALWAYS weird if the other half doesn't occasionally code switch languages, especially for specific words. In other words, the Korean dude is supposed to at least understand Thai, occasionally he’s should use a Thai world to get a point across. And the Thai dude is there to STUDY KOREAN, he should be slipping in and out of Korean regularly. Bah. 

It's airing but...

Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 5 of 10 eps - I never managed to get hold of ep 5. Frankly, it’s going to Netflix (I don’t subscribe) so I might not finish this out of sheer laziness. 

The Hidden Moon (Sat WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - This is a supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger). A man is hired to write an article about an old mansion in Chiang Mai being converted into a café. He sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, falls in love with one of them. Was substantially recast. I loved IFYLITA except the ending so I think I'll let this one run it's course you can tell me if it's work tracking down... if they managed to land it. I have my doubts.

Gangster and His Boyfriend (Korea ????) 8 eps? - was supposed to air 10/10 Kim Dong Bin (famous trainee & idol reality competitor, yeah that happens) stars as a fallen idol who unexpectedly becomes entangled in a gangster family. Discovers that his friend’s father is responsible for the murder of his entire family years ago. I don't know much about this one, neither does anyone else and I'm not sure where I got that release date so……

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming Oct 2024:

10/17 Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo (Korea Thurs Gaga) 8 eps - High school student Do Hoe lives with his violent and brutal father who runs a Taekwondo gym in a rural area. One day, cheerful Ju Young arrives, he dreams of going to college for Taekwondo. Joy begins to fill Do Hoe's dark life. An unexpected incident forces them apart, they reunite ten years later.

10/21 Love in the Big City (Korea ????) 8 eps - Okay, this is both a movie (already out) and a series. Neither one is likely BL and I can't imagine it will end happily. I'm giving both a pass but here's your synopsis.

Cynical fun loving student Young pinballs from home, to class, to on night stands. He and Jaehee, his female besie and roommate, frequent nearby bars where they push away their worries about life, love, and money with soju and hookups.

10/23 See Your Love (Taiwan Weds Gaga & Viki) 10 eps? - Zi Xiong, a third-generation heir, attempting to flee from taking over their family business, meets and falls in love with Shao Peng, who works as a hearing-impaired nurse. From the same production house as Kiseki Dear To Me in partnership with Shinehouse Theatre, funded by Taiwan’s BIGART + Japan's Rakuten (Viki). Show includes Lin Chia Yo (Be Loved in House: I Do). Director Chiang Ping Chen’s childhood experiences with his deaf uncle have inspired the drama.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Addicted Heroin

Incidentally he didn’t ask to “be with Ter” he asked if he could flirt/court him. jeeb doesn’t really have a direct translation, but it isn’t “be with.” 

Fourever You

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.

[cubfan135-facts]

cubfan135 fact #21:

Hermitcraft season 6 featured an unknown individual known only as The Jingler, who conducted a series of pranks on several hermits. Those who fell victim to the Jingler's pranks were often referred to as being "#Jingled". Some pranks included (but are not limited to) vandalizing Grian's map room to say "You have been J-J-Jingled!!!", and leaving a mysterious book in Hermitville with coordinates that merely led to a sign reading, "GG You've been had! #Jingled".

The Jingler's identity was never revealed by the time Season 6 had concluded. Fans and hermits alike speculated their true identity for years. Many fans believed them to be Grian, however it was unlikely as Grian already had two prankster alter egos in Season 6, Poultry Man and The Salmon Ghost. GoodTimesWithScar was revealed to be the Jangler, a different entity entirely with no official ties to the Jingler. Rendog was suspected of being the Jingler for asking his viewers to "jingle that [notification] bell" at the end of his videos. Tango was also suspected of being the Jingler, as his returns to the server coincidentally aligned with the Jingler's pranks.

The most in-depth search for the identity of the jingler on the Hermitcraft server appears to be from Joehills. Upon checking the community mailbox, Joehills discovered a message from the Jingler left in every hermit's mailbox. Deciding that he could not let this devious behavior continue, he set out to follow a trail to reveal their true identity. He initially asks for the help of his viewers to gather intel from other hermit's videos, however this effort would prove fruitless as the Jingler carefully made sure to never reveal themselves on camera. Joe suspects a parrot by the name of Jingles to be behind the pranks, claiming that the parrot works for ConCorp. However, it is possible he was actually thinking of Captain Jack Sparrow, the CEO of ConCorp, and the lead seemed to come to a dead end.

The Jingler's identity was still unknown by the end of season 6, leaving both fans and hermits to speculate on their identity for years. Many began to believe there was no one true Jingler, but the hermits as a collective conducted a multitude of pranks under one common alias.

The Jingler's identity was finally revealed on April 23, 2022 on the Hermitcraft 10-year anniversary livestream. Cub admitted to being the Jingler, notably only after being asked directly by Jevin. Grian in particular was so distraught by the revelation that he joined the discord call from his mobile phone to comment on the situation.

Hermitcraft season 6 began in July of 2018, meaning that the identity of the Jingler was kept a secret for roughly 4 years. It is possible that this is the longest-kept secret in all of Hermitcraft history. The only known "evidence" of Cub being the Jingler is when he is seen during Impulse's Season 6 episode 32 asking if Grian has completed the infinity room. It is likely Cub was inquiring either to see if he could vandalize the map without Grian noticing, or to see Grian's reaction if the prank had already been carried out. Besides this small piece of circumstantial evidence, there was virtually no proof of Cub being the Jingler prior to April 2022. The most concerning detail in this story is, perhaps, the fact that the identity of the Jingler was only revealed when Cub was directly confronted by Jevin on stream. It is unknown if Cub ever planned to reveal the Jingler's identity on his own, and he very well may have intended to take this secret to the grave.

[gunsatthaphan]

~ Monthly BL Breakdown: October 2024 ~ 

☔️ Happy November!!! 🍂 (and Happy Halloween 🎃👻)

Disclaimer: ALL shows can be streamed here or here, as well as on Youtube and other platforms. For more info on where to watch what, check out this post! 

New breakdowns are coming at the end of every month - feel free to add stuff! -> previous breakdowns

What came out this month? (green = seen/currently watching)

🌟 Fourever You - October 3rd (Thailand)

🌟 Uncle Unknown - October 4th (Taiwan)

🌟 My Damn Business - October 5th (South Korea)

🌟 Every You, Every Me - October 6th (Thailand)

🌟 DMD Friendship: It Takes Two (reality show) - October 6th (Thailand) 

🌟 Eccentric Romance - October 10th (South Korea) 

🌟 Blue Complex - October 10th (South Korea)

🌟 Taming the Bad Boy - October 15th (South Korea)

🌟 Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo - October 17th (South Korea)

🌟 Love in the Big City - October 21st (South Korea) 

🌟 See Your Love - October 23rd (Taiwan)

🌟 See You (movie) - October 25th (Taiwan) 

🌟 Perfect Propose: Dream Edition - October 25th (Japan) 

🌟 Blue Canvas of Youthful Days - October 26th (China)

🌟 Perfect 10 Liners - October 27th (Thailand) ✅

🌟 Stealing From My CEO - October 27th (China) 

Monthly Likes / Dislikes

❣️ - Nothing overwhelming going on lately lol but I'm currently enjoying Peaceful Property a lot, it's so unique and fun and I really hope they consider adding more stuff like this in their 2025 lineup!! 🥺

New series & movie announcements

🎥 8 Hours (sequel to 4 Minutes) - Coming 2025

🎥 A Perfect Match - Date TBA (Taiwan)

🎥 Knock Out - Date TBA (Thailand)

🎥 Who Can Define Popularity - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 Haunted Hearts - Date TBA (Philippines)

🎥 About Faith - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 Love Casting (BL reality show) - Date TBA (Taiwan)

🎥 Eyes on You - Date TBA (Hong Kong)

🎥 Winter is not the death of Summer but the birth of Spring - Date TBA (Thailand)

🎥 Beloved Enemy (novel adaption from the author of My Stand In) - Date TBA (?)

🎥 Match Play - Date TBA (South Korea)

Other news from the BL world

❗️ The Korean BL Love Class will get a third season, allegedly with the same cast from the previous seasons. Further details are unknown.

❗️ A second season for the Thai BL 4 Minutes was announced titled 8 Hours. The author Sammon will partner with Be On Cloud again and the show will go into production in 2025.

❗️ Actors Mew Suppasit and Tul Pakorn publicly got engaged at the launch event of Mew's new single "Absence".

❗️ The Thai network channel One31 held their 2025 lineup on October 17th. The following BL productions were announced:

Taste

The Wicked Game

Love Carved in the Moonlight

❗️ The Thai production company Idolfactory released a teaser for their upcoming lineup for 2025. The corresponding event will be held on January 12th. The teaser however revealed the following series prior to the event:

Interminable (starring BillyBabe)

My Sweetheart Jom (starring SaintPoom)

Cranium (starring BeckyFreen)

Somewhere Somehow (starring FayMay)

❗️ After it was disclosed that DMD actors Thomas and Kong would no longer participate in the upcoming series The Next Prince, it was announced that Net S. and JJ R. will take the roles of Calvin and Jay respectively.

❗️ GMMTV released a statement saying that the announcement of the winner of the Y-Find contest has been postponed from October 31st to November 30th due to the large number of submissions. Earlier this year the company announced the project as a way for Thai fans to submit original stories, one of which will be chosen to be adapted into a series. Whether or not the postponement will have any effect on the company's upcoming 2025 lineup event is unclear.

Upcoming series & movies for November:

👉🏻 Bad to Bed - November 2nd (Taiwan)

👉🏻 Love in the Air: Koi no Yokan (remake of Love in the Air) - November 3rd (Japan)

👉🏻 Our Youth - November 5th (Japan)

👉🏻 Episode 9. Nineteen, Eighteen (special ep) - November 9th (South Korea)

👉🏻 All the Liquors (movie) - November 13th (South Korea)

👉🏻 Caged Again - November 15th (Thailand)

👉🏻 Your Sky - November 17th (Thailand)

👉🏻 Mhom Ped Sawan (bl side story) - November 17th (Thailand)

[paulkleestan]

Even More Random IZ facts!

The show itself never reveals where exactly on Earth ZIM and Dib live although the comics confirm it is in the United States. Zoomed out maps used by the Tallest in one episode put it somewhere around the upper Midwest region, either in Michigan or Ohio (some fans theorize it to be Detroit)

In early brainstorming stages the show was originally a more light hearted Mork and Mindy style comedy about an alien misunderstanding human social norms and learning a lesson at the end. Jhonen decided after a sleepless night to go a bit darker by making the alien a hostile invader

The various symbols seen on Irken property in the series have specific meanings. The two eyed symbol is for all of the Irken race and the one eyed one is for Invaders specifically

Jhonen rejected every voice actor who auditioned for GIR because he thought they were “too good”. He ended up giving the role to his friend Rikki Simons who at the time had no voice acting experience

ZIM is responsible for the death of every named Almighty Tallest shown in the series(4)

Dib and Gaz are heavily inspired by Fox Mulder and Dana Scully, respectively, from The X-Files

Almighty Tallests Red and Purple were actually unnamed in the original run of the series. Their names started as nicknames given by the IZ crew and fans and only became canon after the show ended in the script of the unaired episode “The Trial”

Dib has been voted as IZ fans’ favorite character (surprisingly not GIR) and is Jhonen’s personal favorite

Had the series not been cancelled, TAK would eventually come back to Earth and become ZIM’s reoccurring archenemy

It is unknown if the Almighty Tallest are naturally tall or if their suits are just robot shells that they pilot inside their torsos. Jhonen has not given a definitive answer on purpose to keep fans guessing

Enter the Florpus was supposed to end in a cliffhanger, with TAK breaking out of Moo-Ping 10 (space prison), setting the series up for a potential sequel

The Control Brains are the true authority figures of the Irken Empire, with the Tallests only being figureheads. They are actually Irkens that are genetically-engineered to not require bodies

The episode “Lice” was originally called “Lice Nazi”. Nickelodeon obviously did not approve.

Minimoose is canonically genderless and uses they/them pronouns

There is no 100% definitive answer for why Invader ZIM was cancelled by Nickelodeon and even Jhonen himself does not know the exact reason. The most plausible theory is that the ratings it pulled in did not justify its enormous animation expenses.

[antipathy-arsonist]

nobody talks about like. how fucked the madcom series timeline is. like it goes

madcom 1 -> unknown amount of time passes -> madcom 2 -> unknown amount of time passes -> madcom 3 -> unknown amount of time passes -> madcom 4 -> once again. unknown amount of time passes (enough for hank to get a new outfit. waoh) -> madcom 5, hank gets his head ripped off and his jaw obliterated. almost immediately into madcom 6, madcom 7 hank gets thrown off a cliff and set ON FIRE. (Joshua graham reference 🤔) and now hes dead. BUT OHOHO you know what they say. ain't no rest for the wicked hes fighting for their damn LIFE in hell during madcom 9.5, their revived as a half mag in 9 and immediately thrown into a fight with the auditor and they get their arm ripped off right after at the start of episode 10 and the at the start of 11 THEIR BACK IN FUCKING HELL BUT NOW ITS WORSE BECAUSE OF THAT FUCKING CLOWN AND THAT FUCKING FIRE DEMON. oh yeah and they get the same arm that they regrew in 10 ripped off AGAIN.

like. yeah man if all that happened to me that fast id go fucking crazy too.

anyway madcom is a body horror blah blah. im brainrotting about the dumb ninja again and we should talk about him bleh bleh bleh...

[lurkingshan]

Unknown Final Episodes: A Pact?

Thanks all who voted in the poll about your plans for viewing the final episodes! Interestingly, we’re kinda split between people who intend to watch as soon as the eps are accessible and those who want to finish up weekly. We’re a small active community, and the shared discussions after each episode have really enhanced the watch experience. I’d hate to lose that in the final stretch, especially if the tag is full of spoilers and some of us end up having to filter.

So I am proposing a pact: how about we still keep to posting about the episodes on the weekly schedule, regardless of when we each individually watch them? If we did that, we’d finish up like this:

April 20: Ep 10

April 27: Ep 11

May 4: Ep 12

I will personally probably go ahead and watch the eps once they’re available, but I’ll happily commit to still posting weekly about one ep at a time. I want to keep talking about this show for another month! And for folks who just can’t hold it in, maybe we can use a specific tag like [#unknown the series spoilers] so folks sticking to the weekly watch can filter that but not miss the discussion on the current episode.

What do folks think? Very open to other suggestions!

[atamascolily]

Walpurgis no Kaiten SIDE:HOMURA trailer reactions

I admit, when this was first announced, I didn't think it was going to be a big deal. I was expecting something similar to the Wnk 1.1 trailer, which had an extra scene tacked on but what otherwise identical to the original release. I was not expecting an entirely remixed version combining both of the previous trailers + new footage, with a lot to unpack!

Because of the way SHAFT creates the films, backgrounds are done separately from character animation and then combined. Still, there's something very eerie about seeing these otherwise familiar shots devoid of people,not to mention the symbolism of the empty thrones combined with the shot of Devil Homura being cast down.

Once again, I repeat my assertion that in spite of their obvious differences, these two spaces are two versions of the same thing--"reality" and "illusion" (inasmuch as those terms apply anymore in this space.)

The shot of the spinning fans and stained glass are from the same location as the staircase tower where the headband!Homura is falling. Also, if you look closely, you'll note a familiar figure in the crossed shadows at the center of the screen, partially hidden behind the fan. Kyubey spotted, this is not a drill.

(How does this space work? I have no idea, but I'd bet money that it rotates so that the orientation is constantly changing, because "spinning in circles" is such a big theme, both visually and metaphorically.)

Nagisa has died and gone to heaven (literally on both counts) and is now consuming a parafait as big as her head. She's never going back, lol.

There is a teddy bear in a cage visible in the background along with a monogrammed "R". Granted, witches are supposed to use runes, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't remind me of Roberta the Birdcage Witch, who appears briefly in episode 10 of the original series. (It contains human legs and not a teddy bear, though.) Considering that Charlotte's birthday candles appear behind Mami in a different shot, it sure seems like witches and attributes of their labyrinth may be openly manifesting in Mitakihara as reality breaks down.

Oh, and speaking of hands, you can see the mark on Nagisa's nail in this shot, so she's definitely still a magical girl.

The bears also appears as winged cherubs in the carousel scene a few moments later. The heralds of the Last Judgement sounding the trumpets? A symbol of childhood innocence? Another spinning thing that goes around and around? Being taken for a ride? All of the above?

Once again, Nagisa and her double are juxtaposed here as mirror images and reflections of each other, and they're enjoying themselves immensely.

This scene of an unknown hand reaching out to caress a comatose Homura's face and examine her teeth like a horse is disturbing and rightly so. I've seen a lot of people saying that this is the same hand that stabs the salamander, and I agree--this is our primary antagonist, whoever she is (pity her nails aren't visible, as that would give the game away).

[As an aside: what is this unknown person wearing, because it sure isn't a Mitakihara school uniform.]

This is the same Homura that is visible through the mirror--their eyes and headbands are the same. I knew something was off about this when I saw it in the original trailer, and now I have proof. Ditto for my assertion that this movie is going to involve constructs and artificial persons--that may be Homura, but right now it's an empty shell with no personality. The real question is why construct it in the first place?

Also, I might be reading too much into this, but I think it's unwise to assume that the hand that is holding the mirror belongs to the Homura reflected within it. I think this is the unknown person (let's be real, probably also the antagonist Homura) giving instructions to her minion/doll/construct/Homunculus. For evidence, I just have a gut feeling that this movie is going to do screwy things with selfhood and mirrors and reflections, and also the background in the mirror appears to be more like the background in the face-caressing shot than it does the background of the sky in the shot itself. We'll find out when the movie comes out what's actually going on there.

Examining the teeth is a Nutcracker reference, but it sure doesn't make this scene any less disturbing.

What happens next is not shown, but given the general theme of "people falling backwards", I expect that this Homura construct will do the same thing. Where else is there for her to go?

The background light in this scene makes me wonder if it takes place at the same time (or at least the same time of day) as Devil Homura falling. And now we get to see the aftermath!

This is the stunned face of someone who fucked around and is just now finding out. Note the crossed shadows over her face (same as with Kyubey above) and how one eye is cover/one wing is still intact--more "half" imagery.

(But who threw her down? Who threw her down?? Did she fall on her own or was she pushed??)

However, you can't keep Homura down for long, and she immediately counterattacks, summoning her salamander (who is now swole as hell) for a power-up. This is the money shot of the trailer and for good reason--it's visceral and compelling. Magical girls are powered by their emotions and here Homura takes the manifestation of all her feelings straight into her heart; it doesn't get any more symbolic than this.

In addition to being straight out of The Adolescence of Utena, what's most striking to me about this scene is how the world is literally dissolving into blood. We saw the same thing in Rebellion when Homulilly manifested, so whatever happens next will likely parallel that scene in some fashion or another.

Also, yes her wings are partially white now. No, I don't know what that means. I don't know what any of the feathers means, exactly.

The giant salamander concerns me: what the hell has it been eating to get so big? Considering that Homulilly's nature is self-sufficiency, i.e. she draws strength from her own suffering, this does not bode well for Homura at all....

Last but not least, we have Madoka surrounded by some kind of "spirits" representing anonymous, faceless young women in virginal white gowns a la Princess Serenity from Sailor Moon. Combined with the cathedral aesthetic, my guess is that these represent the Eternal Feminine within the Law of Cycles and/or Madoka herself, which she is oblivious to. There are 15 of them, as 14-15 continues to be a significant number in this franchise for reasons I still don't fully understand.

There isn't an official translation that I know of, but piecing together the trailer voice-over with what's come before and what people are saying with my rudimentary Japanese, I think it goes like this:

Watashi wa kibou no tomo ni - "I will go with hope" in Madoka's own voice, from original trailer

Zankoku no made ni yasashii kagayaki, - "A cruelly gentle glow", new dialogue, spoken with multiple voices.

kibou wa anata to tomoni - "Hope will go with you" in Madoka's own voice, also from original trailer

watakushi no inori no kigen - "the origin of my prayer", new dialogue, multiple voices, using the formal feminine pronoun watakushi, which no one in the cast has historically used for themselves. Hence why I think these voices are part of the Law of Cycles/the Eternal Feminine - it would make sense for them to use this pronoun!

anata to kanaeta kiseki wa kitto watashitachi o michibiite kureru.-"The miracle I made with you will surely guide us" in Madoka's own voice, also from original trailer.

sono yasashi-sa de anata o kizutsukete shimau - "I will hurt you with my kindness", Homura, new dialogue.

(EDIT: Official English version is up, and I was wrong about the last line, it's "With that kindness, you yourself will be hurt". They also translate the second line as "A radiance so kind, that it is even cruel", which ties back into the imagery for the Law of Cycles and also Homura's remark in the original anime about kindness leading to greater cruelties.)

Also, while I haven't tried this myself, I've seen several fans report that if you play the scene backwards, you get Homura saying "shiawase no tame ni" (for happiness) as she transforms, so it looks like we did get some backmasking, just as I'd hoped, and I'm so delighted to have called that one.

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

Currently Watching - May

aka The Masterlist

Because I love a good little list - in alphabetical order! 😊

Regularly updated during the month, latest update 31.05.2024

A little link to my favorite bl-tropes-collection 💙

I am happy about gif-requests 🌼

Here you can find all of my gifs.

At the end you can have a look at what we can expect in April with a MDL link and a link for a trailer (if avaible).

This is guaranteed to contain spoilers!

1. 25 Ju, Akasaka de 🇯🇵 (7/10)

I really enjoyed this episode. It didn't feel like a filler. I loved to see some of Hayama's thoughts and emotions. He liked Shirasaki since forever and I really hope they can find their way back together. The pain is so bittersweet. They like each other, but because of walls and misunderstandings they can't live their feelings. Really good episode this week!

2. Cityboy_Log 🇰🇷 (16/?)

I am so confused right now. Sometimes these time jumps are confusing. But okay. Those two made up. And only Jihan apologised? I hate jealousy, extreme jealousy, but I think he didn't need to apologise... I think Jaejun should apologise too, at least for his flirty behavior and this fucking kiss. I still need time to love this again and I hope this story is not going to be more fucked up with cheating and stuff...

3. My Stand-In 🇹🇭 (6/12)

The only thing I can say about the last episode is: I am obsessed with this kiss... There is nothing more in my head. Brain empty. This series is becoming more and more interesting. I am emotional invested now!

4. Only Boo 🇹🇭 (8/12)

I love these two. They are adorable and a blessing on my sundays! We got our first kiss this week and it was a first kiss. It was a little bit awkward and hesitant and cautious and it fit their character really good. I love their energy and the fact that they love each other like they are. It is such a healthy relationship.

5. Wandee Goodday 🇹🇭 (4/12)

From One-nicht-stand to friends with benefits to fake boyfriends... And Kao is right, they have crossed the line with only being fake boyfriends a while ago. Jealousy is beginning to blossom. The wish to kiss each other is groing stronger day to day and I love it here! And is it not normal that you need time to come clean with your own feelings and getting over a year long crush? I totally understand both of them for not letting go of their crushes of years that easy.

6. Word of Honor 🇨🇳 (20/36)

Those two flirt a lot and are a married couple. Everyone knows that. And I love and enjoy that! Overall this is such a fun watch and the different sects and intrigues are sometimes a little bit confusing, but interesting. I love this world of martial arts and I love how protective Wen Kexing is over Zhou Zishu.

Finished in May

Series

Unknown 🇹🇼

The story about found family, childhood trauma and struggling topped with a lovestory between "brothers". They aren't brothers by blood so I really didn't care and just enjoyed this forbidden and hurtful lovestory to the fullest. This was exactly what I hoped for! The longing, tension and hurting is so good! The love between them is real and strong, but Qian is afraid and can't just let his heart decide over the head, yet. He loves Yuan, but is afraid what that means for them and especially for Yuan's future. I love this series so much! I didn't expect too much when I started it and got hooked really fast and in the end my entire week pointed to the saturdays and te new episode and the interaction here with the fandom. The last two epsiodes lost a little bit track and were to cramped with things that didn't need to be there, but I still loved this whole experience! So fucking beautiful! One of my all time favorites. A clear and big 10 out of 10!

Love Is Like A Cat 🇰🇷

The last two epsiodes were so bad I didn't want to gif any scene for this post... I cringed through this whole series... well at least through those parts I didn't skip. I mean, I could not even watch the kiss-scene, because all I could see were the few beard stubbles around Mew's mouth like he didn't get all of them while shaving. And they were so visible against the lightning. And all of their relationship felt so rushed and don't get me started with the thai/korean translator thingy. The concept of this was interesting, but bad executed. It really hurt my feelings to rate a korean bl this low, but everything, the plot, the acting, the dialogue, the script... everything was bad. When I close one eye really tight and think about this cutie Dae Byeol I can give it a 3 out of 10, but really not more.

You Are Mine Special 🇹🇼

This was not on my list this month, but here we are. And what can I say? They kissed a lot! So many kisses! If someone likes kiss, here ya go! It was sweet and a good ending to their story, but a little bit to sugary for me. But that is a personal preference. Those two get engaged and Shun Yu's mother approves of their relationship. It was kinda sweet seeing our CEO as "just" the boyfriend. I guess it is what you wish for as a special episode. I am not mad about it. I give it a solid 7 out of 10.

Blue Boys 🇰🇷

What was this ending? I am speechless and so damn angry! They overcame every misscommunication trope and ended like this? The bad-bitch-wanna-be-girlfriend? The If-I-can't-have-him-no-one-can-bitch? Really? It was a solid web series with great acting and incredible chemistry and they ended up breaking up, because a jealous bitch would destroy Jaemin's life if he continued dating Namyi? And Namyi is now thinking it is his own fault, because his family is rich and because he fell in love? I don't like it here. That ending was stupid. Sorry. Overall a 7 out of 10.

Memory in the letter 🇹🇭

I enjoyed this cute series so much, until the final episode... What was that? It was sweet and kinda wholesome, a little bit tacky, but that was alright and I really liked how they fell in love over the mirror. But that ending? The dad's best friend is now your boyfriend? And he looks so fucking different! Like a total different person. I know, love should be blindm but lets me real, if that was me, I would be: Stop. Who the fuck are you? Why is a 40 year old man hitting on me 20 year old? This felt so bad... I have no problem with the whole time travel, but 20 years is too much! And he is his father's best friend. He delivered his future boyfriend. That felt so wrong! I was a fan until ep 5 and with 6 everything went down... I still give it a 7 out of 10.

Boys Be Brave! 🇰🇷

Okay, it ended.... like that... where is the special epsiode? I want to know how the last date goes between Balgeum and Inho. I am happy for our main couple and they are cute as fuck, but what is with our unlucky side couple? Balgeum wants to become a better person for Inho and that is quite cute, unnecessary, but still kind of understandable. He needs to feel like he can offer Inho something more, while Inho is happy what he already has to offer. But with social backgrounds, I kind of understand him. But where is this special epsiode or spin-off?! I need it! Now! But I am really happy with the ending for our main couple. They are adorable! But the time skips with the hair-extansions confused me a little bit. But for me a strong 8 out of 10.

Kare no Iru Seikatsu 🇯🇵

They got their happy ending and I am happy with that. We got an I love you and some cozy snuggle time. What more do I need? Nothing... A coffee perhaps, but that's okay. I like this series. It was a cute watch with some heartache, but overall it was sweet and cute and positive. And I love Haruna for telling Natsukawa that wanting the best and happiest life for someone you love and at the same time refusing to give that person the thing that would make them the happiest is stupid. They are happy, I am happy. A happy 8 out of 10 for me.

Short Film

Movie

Dropped in May

Looking forward to in May

Upside Down aka Inverse Identity 🇨🇳 - Trailer (May 3rd)

Wandee Goodday 🇹🇭 - Trailer (May 4th)

My Marvellous Dream Is You 🇹🇭 - Trailer (May 8th)

Blossom Campus - Trailer 🇰🇷 (May 16th)

OMG! Vampire 🇹🇭 - Trailer (May 19th)

No international release dates:

A Balloon's Landing 🇹🇼 - Trailer (Coming to cinemas on May 10th)

The Time Of Fever 🇰🇷 - Trailer (Coming to cinemas on May 15th)

Manji Reverse 🇯🇵 (Coming to cinemas on May 24th)

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[wen-kexing-apologist]

Unknown, Ep 10: Qian and Yuan

I’ve had a few people ask if I was going to do a breakdown post for the final scene between Qian and Yuan. Admittedly, I was not planning on doing so, but I like the attention 😈 so I will! 

Last we left off, Qian and San Pang were having a very difficult conversation, San Pang forced Qian to think about the future and was kicked out as a result. 

We start with a moment with each character to themselves. Qian closes the door behind San Pang and we see him hand at the door for a second, head hung in a way that feels very tired. He walks away from the door back to the couch to grab his glasses and wrap up the evening, when the camera cuts to Yuan sitting on the staircase, just out of sight of Qian. 

We see Yuan look up at the ceiling, take a deep breath, and then slowly move his eyes back to center. He is processing everything that he just heard from San Pang and Qian. Yuan is trying to keep himself composed here, he knows that Qian will be heading up the stairs eventually and so he stays seated because he wants Qian to know that he heard everything. Because Yuan is fucking mad. 

Qian heads up the stairs and we get, what could not be a more perfect little deer in headlights look from Qian as he processes that Yuan has heard everything. And I do love what this show does in how it portrays its characters because Yuan is still Qian’s little brother, and his face in the camera looks like that of an upset little kid. “Xiao Yuan,” Qian says as Yuan stands up and rushes down the stairs. In such a quick moment, Chris rolls his eyes, looks up, and then down like Qian is annoyed at Yuan’s behavior while knowing that he is absolutely going to have to be the one to handle it. 

Yuan brushes past him, but Qian immediately turns and follows after him, calls after him, tells him to wait. But Yuan keeps walking. Where he’s going? I have no fucking clue, but it is clear that Qian’s words aren’t going to cut it. Yuan has heard everything that Qian told San Pang. He’s heard about Qian’s wish for their happiness, he’s heard San Pang tell Qian that they love each other, that they have tried everything to make them not love each other, and what he hasn’t heard is an answer to San Pang’s question: 

“Do you want him to have a future without you?”

I don’t know exactly what (if any) part of the conversation acted as the tipping point for Yuan, but he has been pissed the entire episode about Qian hiding his medical stuff from him. So I can imagine that not hearing an answer from Qian about wanting to be in Yuan’s future might serve as a last straw kind of deal. 

And it marks a very important change in Qian that he runs after Yuan this time, that he physically puts himself in front of Yuan to stop him. Because he doesn’t want Yuan to go somewhere to cool off the way he did during Yuan’s first confession four years prior. He doesn’t want to just wait it out. He actually wants to talk to Yuan about where his head is at. That is huge progress from Mr. Hit First Talk Later. 

“Ge.” Yuan says, and then lets out a very big breath, like he’s trying to temper his feelings, but the frustration still bleeds out of him “It was never your fault,” 

Ah, here we go. What set Yuan off is Qian talking with San Pang about the Russian Roulette, reading between the lines there and understanding that Qian is scared of giving in to his feelings for Yuan because he blames himself for how deeply, how steadfastly Yuan loves him. Yuan is willing to die for him, and Qian has never had that before. He’s scared of giving in to his feelings for Yuan because he is scared of losing Yuan, and he is scared that Yuan’s love for him means Yuan will be lost because of him. 

“It was never your fault,” Yuan said and he put his hands on Qian’s shoulders. 

I do not even know how to describe the look Qian gives Yuan when he heard those words, nor can I really tell you what emotion(s) Qian is feeling in that moment, but I can tell you that I am obsessed with that look on his face. It’s like his breath catches in his throat and there is an ambiguity there, just like there was a bit of ambiguity in the head nod he gave San Pang, because he’s out of breath from running after Yuan, but there is also this chance that the pause in his breathing there is because of what Yuan said. Anyway: 

“Even though I know that in the end you might not want all that I’ve given-” 

Yuan says, while Qian looks down in the direction of his shoulders, where Yuan’s hands were just a moment ago. They made excellent casting choices here, I actually think for this scene it is really important that Kurt is taller than Chris, because it adds some extra power to Yuan’s position for me here. The way Yuan looks down at Qian makes him seem even more pissed off about the entire situation, almost like he’s belittling Qian. He wants to dig a knife in here, and he’s being successful at it

“Hearing it first hand still hurts a little,” 

And we are back in our original confession dynamic. Qian is not looking at Yuan, Yuan refuses to look away from Qian. Qian looks kind of out of it, I would say he is dissociating a little bit, but I actually think what is happening here is that Qian is getting hit with the full force of Yuan’s words. I think he is absorbing and processing everything that is being said and understanding how not making a decision is hurting Yuan. Mostly because of how quick his reaction time is to trying to stop Yuan from walking away immediately after he says it hurts. 

“I’ll be fine. I just need some time.” Yuan says, and I do think he means it. I think when Yuan came back from the States he had reached a point where he could live without Qian changing their relationship status, even if he didn’t want to. 

But as Yuan tries to walk away, Qian stops him.

“I didn’t mean it that way,” look at him using his words!  Qian looks so fucking exhausted when he does. The world has weighed heavy on him for so long, he’s been fighting an internal battle with himself about his feelings for Yuan for ages. It’s a lot, and the way Chris holds Qian here makes it feel like a lot. But, Yuan finally settles, because Qian is willing to engage in conversation. He is trying to clarify a misunderstanding, he is not outright rejecting Yuan here, he is not running away from talking about his feelings for Yuan. And so Yuan can stay, because there is some hope left there for him to hold on to. 

He releases another huge breath, he stretches for just a second, grounding himself. He looks back at Qian “Then what do you mean?” 

Qian stares in to the void, then rolls his eyes upwards, closes his eyes, and sighs. Chris shakes his head a little, like Qian is giving up. Because he is giving up. Because Qian is about to say the words. He is about to admit that his feelings for Yuan aren’t clear cut. Yuan looks away from  Qian in this moment, where Qian is getting himself together. 

gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

“I can’t really figure out if it is love or something else that my feelings for you are.” And at the end of this, he isn’t running from the words anymore, because he looks at Yuan and Yuan is looking back at him. When Yuan first admitted his feelings, his suffering caused Qian to avoid eye contact. When Yuan returned, Qian couldn’t stop looking at Yuan. When listening to Yuan once again speak to his feelings and tell Qian he was hurting, Qian started in his comfort zone, in the old habits of looking away. But when he is actually admitting his feelings to Yuan, he does turn to look him in the eye. He isn’t avoiding it anymore. 

“Is it the love of a brother? Can we really turn it into romantic love? I don’t know.” Qian is finally having the conversation he has needed to have with Yuan. This is confusing, how do you separate your feelings out? How do you know? What happens if things don’t go well? How much are you set to lose if things devolve?” 

Yuan is capable of holding, understanding, and pushing that nuance, we’ve seen him do it before at the river. “This thing between us, is it because you don’t want or you don’t dare?” 

“Yes.” Qian says “All I know is I can’t live without you.” 

Yuan has seen that, San Pang and Lili have seen that, we have seen that. Qian wants to be careful with how he proceeds along this path, and he is right to do so. Because it is hard to determine, when you have known someone so long, when you have raised them, when you have seen them as a brother, when you have not had love outside of the family before, when that love has existed the entire time, and has been different the entire time, and how do you recognize that when you are in it? 

There is a pause. 

“Four years later, you came back.”

There is another pause. 

I love these pauses. I love Qian putting space between these thoughts, whether he is scrambling internally for what to say, or whether he is hesitant to voice them, I do not know. I just know that I love love love when directors allow for breathing room. 

“I saw your letter of last words.” 

Qian stops looking at Yuan here. Another little pause. 

“That’s when I started to feel scared.” 

The camera cuts to a wide shot, where both Qian and Yuan are visible. And we can see Yuan reacting to what Qian is saying. Yuan also is not making eye contact, he is fidgeting a little. But he is listening intently to Qian’s words. The blocking of this shot is interesting to me too, because the way that Chris is standing has Qian facing Yuan, but we don’t see enough of Chris’ eyes here, so while it looks like Qian is looking at Yuan, that is not necessarily the case. We have seen him look away multiple times and his head barely moves. 

Qian is talking in to the void, and Yuan is picking up the signal. Another pause, and right before Qian continues talking, Yuan turns to look at him with this look of surprise on his face. His mouth is slightly agape, his eyes look soft staring at Qian.

 “I’m terrified,” Qian says. “What if you had no chance to come back? I don’t know what I would do.” 

Yuan looks at Qian, looks away, looks up like he is trying to decide how to feel. What type of treatment he should be giving to Qian at this moment. Should he be bitter, should he be harsh, should he be soft? 

“Wei Qian.” Yuan says 

AND I WILL ONCE AGAIN SHAKE MY FIST AT THE SUBTITLES FOR TRANSLATING GE AS QIAN BECAUSE IT SO SEVERELY CUTS THE IMPORTANCE OF MOMENTS LIKE THIS ONE. 

Qian cannot figure out his feelings! He can’t figure out if he loves Yuan like a brother or something more! So Yuan cuts the brother out of it. He calls Qian by his name. He calls him Wei Qian, he puts the separation up for Qian. Is this the love of a brother? That’s an easier question to answer when you aren’t being called ‘brother’. How do you feel when you aren’t being reminded of your connection? 

I do not have the ability to describe the way Kurt’s mouth moves here, but I love the expression he gives Yuan as he finishes saying Wei Qian. He’s clearly going for a soft approach. Qian’s mouth, which hangs open just slightly, closes shut. 

“I’ve told you. I can sum up my life in two words: Wei Qian.” A smile starts to creep up his face. That’s love, bitch! Yuan was pissed, but now that Qian has stopped him, not that Qian has voices his hesitations, now that Qian has admitted that he can’t live without Yuan, even if he doesn’t know what his feelings for Yuan are, the love Yuan has for Qian melts the anger and lets the love bleed through. “But I’m not making you take responsibility for me.” 

This is a very important character trait of Yuan’s. One of the first things we saw of teenage Yuan was him grabbing one of the household bills. Yuan has been working side hustles while in school. He’s been helping pay the bills. He’s been as helpful as he possibly can be at all times, because this was a home he was given, not a home he was born in to. 

GOD DAMMIT CHRIS IS SO GOOD. ALL HE DID WAS MOVE HIS EYEBALLS LIKE…TWO CENTIMETERS AND THAT WAS ENOUGH TO KILL ME. 

Yuan is saying all the things that Qian needs to hear. Yuan can sum his life up with Qian, Qian fed him, Qian kept him warm, Qian gave him a home, Qian gave him love. Qian has seen Yuan as his responsibility since they were kids, but Yuan has wanted nothing but to be a support system for Qian. I said it before, that Yuan is the only person who continuously helps Qian to whom Qian is not beholden. Qian owes San Pang and his family, Qian owes Le and the gang, Qian owes Xiong. Qian does not owe Yuan. Qian does not see Yuan as someone that owes him. 

That small little eye motion are some gears clicking in to place in Qian’s head. That small little eye motion is Qian well and truly listening to what Yuan is saying. 

And here comes the parallel: 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

“Did you come after me because you feel guilty, or because you care?” (this thing between us, is it because you don’t want or you don’t dare?) 

A genuine question that Yuan is using to try to push Qian in to allowing himself finally see his feelings through to the end. Qian is standing here before Yuan telling him that he does not know what his feelings for Yuan are. Even though those In The Know (Yuan and San Pang) can see the truth in Qian clear as day, Qian himself has not admitted it. 

So Yuan gives him a test.

Qian pauses for a moment, starts to shake his head, blinks. 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

“I really don’t know,” he says 

Qian has failed the test. 

Yuan’s soft smile has a hint of sadness in it now. 

“You don’t need to know.” Yuan leans back against the wall, looking up at the sky. Qian is looking straight ahead, once again not making eye contact with Yuan “It’s always been my problem. Going home with you.”

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

The weight of what Yuan is saying hits. Qian looks at the ground. Complete opposite direction as Yuan.  

“Getting attached to you. Falling for you.” 

Qian closes his eyes and sighs, pulling his head up from where it was pointed. It’s like he can’t get used to hearing Yuan confess. Like it hits him every time Yuan says he’s in love with Qian and has been forever. 

“Wanting you all my life.” 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

That is too much for Qian. Even with his eyes closed, even though he can’t see Yuan right now, he has to face away. 

“It was never your fault.” Yuan says, and Qian’s eyes open ever so slightly. 

And I just have to say that it is really really important to me that with all of Qian’s trauma, with everything he has suffered, with the stuff he went through with his mother, that he finally has someone tell him that it wasn’t his fault. There is naturally a lot of hesitation in changing the way you see someone you have raised, someone you have looked at and treated as a brother, and suddenly see them as someone to be romantically interested in. 

gif by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

So it is important to me that Yuan tells Qian he did nothing wrong. That Yuan’s feelings here are entirely his own, borne of his own mind and body, and that there is no aspect of Yuan’s feelings for him that Qian pressured him in to. That Yuan will be fine, eventually, if Qian does not reciprocate his feelings. Qian is not being forced in to anything here, and neither is Yuan. And I am so so so glad that Qian got to hear that. Twice! 

Anyway, Qian’s eyes open ever so slightly right as Yuan starts walking away, shoulder checking Qian on his way out. 

“Wait.” Qian grabs Yuan by the wrist “Wei Zhiyuan.” 

gifs by @wanderlust-in-my-soul

Yuan’s eyes are locked on to Qian’s hand around his wrist. He once again looks surprised that Qian would be brave enough to stop him from leaving. We get a shot of their hands (😈) and Yuan ever, ever so slowly raises his eyes to look at Qian.  

Qian has passed the test at the last second.

[guzhufuren]

QL Schedule 30.09.24-06.10.24

MONDAY

Battle of the Writers Jack & Joker First Note of Love Our Golden Times

TUESDAY

Addicted Heroin Thailand Reverse 4 You* Love Is Like a Poison

WEDNESDAY

I Saw You In My Dream special episode Unlock Your Love* Heavens x Candy Love In The Big City (movie, cinemas in South Korea)

THURSDAY

Monster Next Door Chaser Game W 2* Fourever You The Two Of Us S2* The Paradise of Thorns (3/10 cinemas in Laos, 10/10 in Singapore, 11/10 in Vietnam, 8/11 in Taiwan)

FRIDAY

Affair* Kidnap Uncle Unknown Club Friday: Family Tragedy

SATURDAY

The Hidden Moon Apple My Love* My Damn Business Teenager Judge

SUNDAY

The Loyal Pin* Every You Every Me Love Sick Bad Guy My Boss

starts airing soon:

02/10 I Saw You In My Dream special episode 02/10 Heavens x Candy 02/10 Love In The Big City (movie, cinemas in South Korea) 03/10 Fourever You 03/10 The Paradise of Thorns (cinemas in Laos, 10/10 in Singapore, 11/10 in Vietnam, 8/11 in Taiwan) 04/10 Uncle Unknown 05/10 Apple My Love* 05/10 My Damn Business 06/10 Every You Every Me 10/10 Eccentric Romance 16/10 No Heaven But Love* (cinemas in South Korea) 17/10 Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo 21/10 Love In The Big City (series) 23/10 See Your Love 25/10 See You 01/11 The Nipple Talk 02/11 Bad to Bed 03/11 Love In The Air Koi 04/11 Our Youth (Miseinen) 08/11 The Fragrance You Inherit* 14/11 My Ex's Wedding* (cinemas in Thailand) 23/11 Petrichor*

waiting for international release:

? Old Days in the Middle of Summer ? Smells Like Green Spirit ? Be Moon ? Blue Canvas of Youthful Days ? Mr. Mitsuya's Planned Feeding (here with fansubs) ? Sugar Dog Life ? There's Love That Starts From Mistaken Identity ? Player 10 (on youtube with fansubs) ? Meet Unexpectedly ? Uranus2324* ? A Man Who Defies the World of BL S3 (here with fansubs)

*you can track ql schedules here

[animehouse-moe]

I Miss The Case Study of Vanitas Because Sex

Okay, please forgive me for the clickbait-y title, but I just had to take it. The whiplash is too fun to me. Anyways, yes, I miss The Case Study of Vanitas (both as an anime and manga, since we've not gotten vol 10 in English yet) because of sex. Not the act in and of itself, but the appeal, the tension, the experience. Animanga isn't nearly as sexless as North American media, but it presents its own unique challenges and issues. So, if you don't mind, please humor my little foray into an attempt to explain the decoupling of fan service and sex appeal, with The Case Study of Vanitas as a medium.

⚠️Warning: I've done my best to keep it spoiler free, but by nature there is mild spoilers in regards to characters and certain interactions.⚠️

Is The Case Study of Vanitas about sex? Well, obviously not, no, it's about vampires. But as much as it's about vampires, it's also about despair, hope, penance and revenge, and the intricacies of the human condition. It just happens to feature vampires as the selling point. And I believe therein lies the best explanation of Vanitas: it's not about sex, but rather contains those aspects as a part of the people that exist in its world.

Fanservice has become a rather perverted term. Rather than appealing to a broad range of applications, fanservice tends to exclusively apply to displays that are sexual in nature (most typically in regards to catering to male audiences). In that way it's not particularly awful in how the term itself has shifted, but the use of fanservice is borderline pathetic in most series. A gaudy display of body parts, it hangs on excessive scale and movement to catch the eyes of touch starved individuals. I don't need a ballooned bosom besetting my vision before bobbing about in a baroque display for all too long. That's not the point.

But what is the point? Well, I've prattled on long enough so here's an example.

A look in the eyes, the right lighting. Even simple posing. Sex appeal is not limited to explicit displays of sexuality, but is rather the personification of both the character's intent as well as their external perception.

There are so many moments in this series that are in no way explicitly sexual, but can easily be perceived to have sex appeal or sexual tension.

But then, how would that appeal not feel weakened? It's a good question, honestly, and an important one to ask. When you display the chest of an underaged girl enough times, it won't elate the audience enough to be perceived as "good". It's a universal issue with storytelling, so how does Vanitas get around it?

My answer (and perhaps not the only answer) is how this appeal and tension is derived. I had sort of said it earlier, but didn't really explain. Its source is the very nature of the characters and world. It is not an external force exposing these facets, but the machinations of the plot and its pieces themselves.

Have a look at this example here. Vampires are hot, right? Their power, broody nature, and the concept of the unknown have played into their eroticism and appeal since time immemorial (seriously, look up Carmilla). Vanitas pounces on that concept and immediately plays into it. We don't get blood sucking every episode and every second, no. But we get it enough to provide variation, it appears at the right time to provide another layer to the nature of the story and characters.

Anyways, the example. Lord Ruthven and Noe. Two vampires, engaging in something strictly non-sexual. He is simply biting Noe. But the posing, the nature of the layout. It presents tension. It presents Ruthven's ownership and commanding nature of Noe in this moment. Domination and subjugation.

Even more is this sequence. The commanding nature that presents a clear power dynamic. The phrasing. It absolutely exudes sexual tension. But nothing of the sort is apparent in the actual interaction.

So what's the deal here. I know I had spoken on how characters themselves can convey tension and appeal without explicit intent to do so, but how can circumstance and interaction play into it as well?

Another lovely question. What comprises the act of sex? What are the pieces that elate, entice, and encourage someone? Well, aside from the answer that it's down to the individual, there's a few core pieces. The "top and bottom" dynamic is certainly the one that appears the most when dealing with pairs. Another, while a bit unseemly and slightly (?) taboo is the concept of fear and violence. Of course, I don't mean in any serious context, but the concept is how those things make you feel, and that they stem from that similar power dynamic. Perhaps that's the best word to describe it with: power dynamic. It's all about how two characters interact with each other, where they stand in relation to one another. The above image is the perfect example of that, and the following is how to build on it.

Vanitas and Jeanne, an incredible combination born not out of a mutual desire for the other, but the sheer interest of one and the needs of another. It's a one sided love spurred on by the actions of one that encourages the other to let loose. It creates the interesting dynamic of a power bottom that remains refreshing alongside the other relationships that exist in the story.

So here's a clip of that dynamic.

The way the camera and characters hang on each moment, the way the layouts aim to both obstruct but also apply razor focus. The voice acting. All of it, every single moments provides for that tension and appeal, and it extends past the act of sucking blood and into the souls of the characters themselves. A terrible plead that spills from blood stained lips, a promise that comes from the origin of that crimson.

This "sex appeal" and "sexual tension" is not something manufactured, but the absolute core of these characters. The act of domination, the incredible an undesired need of a substance, the mental fractures eroding at the ego of a person. All of these moments stem from the very souls of the characters and bubble up to the surface in these forms of expression. Where words will not do, actions speak in their place.

Also, Vanitas moaning. Yes please. The greatest benefit to this series is the fact that it's willing to lean into the men as well. This is not "just" for the guys (and lesbians), no. This is for everyone, but especially those that enjoy a side of insanity and toxicity to their romance.

So that brings us to the end. Vanitas is not "about" sex, Vanitas is sex and is the purest way to deliver on fan service while providing sexual tension and appeal. It's subtle, subdued, infrequent and benign. It does not bend to the desires of the viewer, but rather stems from those of the characters. And so many series need to take note. "Lucky Lecher" and perversely excessive displays have no home in my heart when there are far more artistic and desirable sequences that can be produced.

[absolutebl]

We've had recent disappointments with the endings to series. For me, Last Twilight, Only Friends, and 23.5 stand out. While I loved the Sign to the end, there was that unexplained Tharn getting his freedom from Chalothorn, which made the very ending not quite perfect. And while I loved Century of Love all the way through, I know some folks were disappointed at the ending.

What are some QLs that you consider to have really strong endings?

OOOO what a great question!

10 BLs With the Strongest Endings

Some BLs had better endings than the rest of the show deserved, and some were saved by the ending, while still others built up to a good ending throughout. So I suspect it kinda depends on ones definition of strong. But here are mine (you'll never guess what's at the top? but...) it's in no particular order

Seven Days - no but ACTUALLY think about it. That ending is truly phenomenal. It ties everything together, gives hope for their relationship without being cheesy AND is crazy romantic, plus it brings the narrative full circle. That ending shot, the direction, the plot, the characters, and the story ALL tied in a neat little bow. It ends by indicating that something is starting for them, something familiar it's just now they are together. Fabulous.

Light On Me - on the beach, the whole friendship group, the kiss that mirrors their couple habit of cheek squiging? Peak YA BL. It reminded me of Make it Right, and that's no bad thing... for me.

Our Dating Sim - domestic boyfriends and then the pan over to all their couple photos. So exactly them.

To My Star - yeah, the sex scene, but remember this was when we finally realized that JiWoo not only liked him all along but actually desired him all along. The tsundere character breaking open for us to see the soft underbelly. Suddenly, all of his behavior made sense in retrospect. They used the final ultra romantic sex scene as a CHARACTER REVEAL. Fucking genius.

Semantic Error - the BOYFRIENDS of it all, the harken back to both the anime and the manga (with that spank bank file), the teasing and then the breaking of the forth wall. It was multiple cheeky punches out to the audience in a tiny stinger of a scene. Not to mention it had a kind of BL "ending fairy" thing that connected to them both being idols. Perfectly executed.

Love For Love's Sake - back in beach territory but wow. I mean this show starts with an ending. And it takes a lot for me to believe in the happiness of a parable about death and self worth. They managed it with this show. But that ending was killer.

My Beautiful Man - the ending made me reassess everything about the show, the story, and the characters. The ending made me love the show. It changed my mind. It BLEW my mind. I might have kinda lost my mind. In real time.

Unknown - there were struggles with this show and not everyone enjoyed the ending but I totally flipping loved it. FINALLY. You can't tell me that "you don't even know what I dream of" line doens't live in your head rent free.

Unintentional Love Story - not the ending scene so much as the whole final episode, it's so good. It brings the story together, we get multiple big realizations, sad baby, learning that baby was abused too, defending baby, baby defending himself. RINGS!

The Eighth Sense - so much peak boyfriend after so much angst. The casual language play and teasing, the stealing of the drink, just everything, and also how very very college it all is.

10 Others I just LOVE

Be Loved In House: I Do - ultra pasteurized cheese fest

Laws of Attraction - THE CAPED WEDDING OUTFITS

About Youth - rainbow kiss cheese fest

Long Time No See - BLOOD COVERED KISSES

Restart After Come Back Home - the pan around lens flare kiss and everything it MEANS

Bad Buddy - It was so CLEVER

DNA Says Love You - the claiming and then the tussle at the cafe? Gorgeous. Adorable. No notes.

Oh! Boarding House - a family gathering while the dads are holding hands behind the couch, adorable

Where Your Eyes Linger - that damn glow up

Tinted With You - perhaps... poly?

Wow... so few Thai BL. I guess this is Korea's strength in the BL sphere? Also more Japan than I expected and outsized rep for Taiwan. (I actually could have stuck a few more from Taiwan on here but they just get SO CHEESY.)

(source)

dated mid August 2024, not responsible for great endings after that date

[quicksrlver]

DFF ep. 10: Phee as an unreliable narrator

I find Phee's narrated reveal to Jin so odd. That device hasn't been used in the series thus far, even during Tan's reveal as New. DFF has always been "show" not "tell", which is why I will be disappointed if this doesn't turn out to be a case of unreliable narration.

There are two chunks of flashbacks as Phee tells all to Jin: 1) rapid cut scenes from previous episodes, not narrated, and 2) new scenes from New's POV, which are narrated by Phee. In the second set of scenes, New sets up traps for Por and drugs Top, which align with scenes from episodes 1-4, but as such, they didn't need to be explicitly narrated for the audience to understand that they happened. (Again, why it would be so disappointing if this is played straight.)

Phee quickly glosses over the extent of his participation, in that he says

but does it seem right that Phee would find this to be a feasible plan? If the group admits what they did to Non, what could they do with that information? Even if Phee might think he could give drugged confession over to his dad, does he really believe that New, who at this point has lost everything in his life and whom Phee has seen spiral into hopelessness, can simply end this ordeal at that?

I think it's possible he is misrepresenting parts of the truth in order to further some shared goal with New or his own agenda, perhaps with a third party.

In terms of evidence for this being part of New+Phee's shared plan, New doesn't seem all that surprised at being outed to the group, not that the group really gives a fuck. As Tee so eloquently states,

This reveal of an unknown brother to the already deranged group means nothing. But, Phee gains something by revealing "useless" information to Jin - he learns that Jin was the one who filmed the video of Non and Keng

(Now the way this was filmed was also weird, but I can't think of a reason why Jin would lie, so let's assume he is telling, to his knowledge, the truth.)

This is (maybe) the first piece of information Phee (and New) have learned concerning the actions the group have taken to cause Non's disappearance, or at least breakdown. Phee could have realized that the drugs were too aggresive and the group would kill each other off before they got anything on Non, and chose to get information instead. In this case, what Phee misrepresents would be the extent of his involvement, that in truth he is more of an active participant than he lets on, all to get Jin to trust him more. Notice how none of the flashbacks include scenes of Phee approaching Jin to get close to him.

However, if the reveal is a tactic, it could also be to further Phee's own goals, potentially with a third party. In this case, Phee would be entirely misrepresenting who is doing the acts of violence, maybe not New at all. Possible evidence toward this is that while New is deeply unhinged right now, he doesn't seem quite bloodthirsty enough to take a life (in killing Uncle Dang). He certainly acted surprised enough at his body.

Fluke interrupts Jin before there can be a reveal of Phee as Non's ex boyfriend or of the presumed actions that New took to ruin the group, which leads me to believe that none of what we have seen so far has been the whole truth. The narrative makes more sense as a set up to a twist coming in ep. 11 and 12.

All I'm saying is, don't ready the stones for Phee just yet.

(The way that I would least like for events to play out is if this episode is completely played straight - Phee will kill a mad New in an act framed as righteous, perhaps by protecting Jin, and an alive Non will return home to find his parents dead and his (ex)boyfriend having betrayed him and killed his brother. Woo!)

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

My memory is terrible so I wanted to do a breakdown of my stuff every once in a while. Might be monthly, might be whenever I feel like it.

QL - Currently Watching

🇹🇭1000 Years Old [10/12] - This is dragging and I am incredibly bored.

🇹🇭23.5 [4/12] - This show is incredibly cute and I'm smiling through the whole thing. Aylin is my favourite and I'm hoping against hope for the teachers to become a couple. Make it happen gmmtv!

🇹🇭Deep Night [6/8] - The long shots are killing me but the story is moving fast. There's a surprising amount of good communication and the throuple is almost inevitable a this point.

🇰🇷Jazz for Two [6/8] - This is the first bl show where I read the source material before the show and I wish I hadn't. The changes that were made just don't make sense to me, because I don't see how it serves the story. But putting that aside, the story feels rushed and the pacing is weird. The second couple doesn't read believable with this time frame. Anyway I might edit this post when I watch the last 2 episodes. [EDIT] Completed. Final thoughts here. 🇯🇵Love is Better The Second Time Around [4/6] - Why must you do this again Japan? 6 episodes for this one? I'm not happy about this. This show is so good. I love how the mains communicate, not to mention they are beautiful to watch.

🇯🇵My Strawberry Film[7/8] - I have no idea what this show is about nor it seems does it. Do I care at this point? Nope, not really. Let it be over.

🇹🇭To Be Continued [6/8] - This is getting into The Promise territory and I'm not amused. Another one that is dragging and I like the second couple but they barely have any screen time. I'll finish it because there are only two episodes left but I'll be sprinting to the finish line.

🇹🇼Unknown [7/12] - It hurts so good. The songs were killing me this episode. I really liked the separation, I think it was necessary for them. Yuan seems more mature and it will be interesting to see how it changes the relationship.

QL - Finished

🇹🇭Cherry Magic Th – What a wonderful surprise this was. Tay and New are beautiful together and their chemistry was on point. I really liked how the source material was used here.

🇯🇵Cherry Magic Anime – It was quite faithful to the manga with only a couple of deviations and of course it didn't cover everything but I really enjoyed watching yet another version of these characters.

🇹🇭Dead Friend Forever – It was quite a ride. I specially enjoyed the communal watching of this one and all the theories as more people tuned in. Didn't love the ending but it was better than I thought. Still not over White though. 🇯🇵Although I Love You, and You? - Started great, the middle was meh, and by the end I wasn't invested enough in the couple so even though it ended happy, it didn't make up for the rest of it. 🇯🇵Perfect Propose - Great all the way through. I loved this characters a lot and still think it's amazing how well the time was used here. 🇯🇵Ossan's Love Returns - It's Japan at it's finest. Love, food, chaos, found family and cherry blossoms. What more can I ask for? 🇯🇵She Loves to Cook, and She Loves to Eat - My heart grew.🖤

🇹🇼Anti Reset - This is one of the most frustrating shows I've watched in a while. This started off strange and most of the show doesn't seem to know what it wanted to say about the AI part of it. It drove crazy on a weekly basis. But I thought their chemistry was really good and they are just an adorable couple. These 4 VBL series [Stay By My Side, You Are Mine, Vip Only] were a mixed bag for me. I think Stay By My Side is my favourite overall.

🇨🇳The Spirealm - First of all, Ruan Lan Zhu is absolutely gorgeous and his outfits are always perfection. The visuals are really good. This was definitely not a cheap production. The sets for all the doors are incredible. Talking only about the game, I gotta say the second door was my favourite. The bromance toes the line, but I'm not surprised this was taken down. I think if they'd kiss it would be less obvious than some of their scenes. I'm not going to spoil the ending but if you're thinking about watching here's your warning. A bit after the halfway point it gets incredibly sad and the ending is just heart-breaking.

Dropped 🇹🇭A Secretly Love [3/10] 🇹🇭Kiseki Chapter 2 [2/6] Also haven't started Two Worlds because I'm waiting to know if I should bother. I'm experiencing a bit of Thai bl fatigue so we'll see.

Rose Watches OJBL

Takumi-kun 1: And The Spring Breeze Whispers (2007) - The editing is choppy as hell and it gets hard to understand the characters motivations. And the acting is not good. Yeah, not a fan of this one. Udagawachou de Matteteyo (2015) - This one is weird. I recently watched Life as a Girl so I admit that the comparison doesn't help this one at all. The idea is interesting but the execution is poor. There's a couple of scenes that are a bit hard to watch. In this particular story I think if we had a bit more insight to the characters motivations it would've helped me connect and feel more invested. In the end, for my particular goal it was fine I guess.

Other - Watched

🩷Tengu's Kitchen (2023) | Fudanshi Bartender no Tashinami (2022) Formula 17 (2004) | Mars: Zero no Kakumei (2024) | 🩷Joshi-teki Seikatsu (2018)

1 Year of Rose-Tinted Glasses

It's been a year of Rose this month. And it's been kinda great. It took me a while to get over my shyness here and I still feel intimidated but it's gotten better. The people in this space have been really kind to me and I appreciate it so much. Thank you so much for the space.

That's it for right now. As usual my ask box is open for gif requests and any other questions. Happy Easter to all who celebrate.

Have a good week💜

[gunsatthaphan]

~ Monthly BL Breakdown: February 2024 ~ 

🌱 Happy March!!! 🌷

Disclaimer: ALL shows can be streamed here or here, as well as on Youtube and other platforms. For more info on where to watch what, check out this post! 

New breakdowns are coming at the end of every month - feel free to add stuff! -> previous breakdowns

What came out this month? (green = seen/currently watching)

🌟 Anti Reset - February 2nd (Taiwan)

🌟 Love Syndrome: The Beginning - February 8th (Thailand)

🌟 Baka Pwede pa? - February 9th (Philippines)

🌟 War of Y: The Reunion (special episode) - February 10th (Thailand)

🌟 1000 Years Old - February 14th (Thailand)

🌟 My Strawberry Film - February 16th (Japan)

🌟 A Secret Love - February 17th (Thailand)

🌟 To Be Continued - February 19th (Thailand)

🌟 Unknown - February 24th (Taiwan)

🌟 Wedding Impossible - February 26th (South Korea)

🌟 Kiseki Chapter 1 & Chapter 2 - February TBA (Thailand)

🌟 Ambiguous - February TBA (South Korea)

Monthly likes/dislikes

❣️ I'm gonna have to list Cherry Magic and Cooking Crush again just because they filled me with so much serotonin lol. Truly beautiful productions, so carefully written, so well executed and with so much wholesomeness and so many green flags lol. I had the best time watching them and the fact that 2 OG pairs had comeback shows back to back gave me so much nostalgia lol, especially since the genre is reminiscent of their old shows. It's been a blissful and therapeutic few months and I'm extremely sad that it's over 😩🥺🫶🏻 A+ content from everyone involved. 12/10 for both.

👎🏻 It has been a year lmao a lot of things happened this month, the Pawin situation makes me sad, we don't know what actually happened but the whole thing is messed up either way. James dropping out of LUAT came as a surprise as well, I'm not a NetJames fan but if they really had a falling out like the rumors say then that's sad. Singto coming back to gmm has been a nice surprise amongst the scandals lol but other than that I hope things go uphill after this 🥺

New series & movie announcements

🎥 My Bias is Showing (manwha adaption) - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 All About Lust - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 A Balloon's Landing - Date TBA (Taiwan)

🎥 Roommates - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 Good Night to Get Drunk - Date TBA (South Korea)

🎥 First Note of Love - Date TBA (Taiwan)

🎥 Living With Him - Coming April 11th (Japan)

🎥 The Young Gangster - Coming 2025 (Taiwan)

Other news from the BL world

❗️ Actor Singto Prachaya has returned to GMMTV as an artist. He previously left the company in 2021 to work as a freelance actor & producer after being under contract for nearly 5 years. It is unknown whether he will be part of any projects of the 2024 lineup.

❗️ The Thai BL Playboyy is getting a second season.

❗️ The upcoming Korean series High School Return of a Gangster announced the removal of the original BL plot. The show will air as a censored version, focusing on the friendship between the male leads.

❗️ Actors Charles Tu (HIStory 4) and Michael Chang (My Tooth Your Love) were confirmed to star in the upcoming BL First Note of Love. The series tells the story of a musician who is struggling with stage fright and one of his fans. An air date has not been announced.

❗️ Actor Non Ratchanon will no longer partake in the upcoming BL Live in Love. In an official statement, the production company stated that the decision was made due to disagreements between his agency and the one representing his co-star Hearth Chindanai. A recast for his role has yet to be announced.

❗️ GMMTV actor Win Pawin was accused of physically assaulting his ex-girlfriend, who made public allegations with photo evidence of her wounds. As a result GMMTV released a statement announcing the suspension of Pawin from all further work activities until legal investigations are complete. This lead to him making a public statement saying he is withdrawing from the upcoming BL We Are. He was cast as one of the 8 protagonists and was paired with his former partner Marc Pahun. GMMTV released a followup statement today, announcing Pawin's character would be recast to newbie Poon Mitpakdee.

❗️ Actor James Supamongkon announced his withdrawal from the upcoming Domundi BL Love Upon a Time. He released a statement on Twitter, saying he wants to expand his career and focus on other projects as an artist apart from acting. The company stated that Net and the others will stay part of the cast and that a new partner for Net will be cast shortly. This caused a big uproar amongst the fans who have been waiting for the series since it was announced over a year ago. Whether James' dropping out has anything to do with a dispute between him and Net is not confirmed.

Upcoming series & movies for March

👉🏻 Love is Better the Second Time Around - March 5th (Japan)

👉🏻 Deep Night - March 7th (Thailand)

👉🏻 Two Worlds - March 21st (Thailand)

👉🏻 High Demand - March 23rd (Thailand)

👉🏻 Wuju Bakery - March TBA (Thailand)

👉🏻 The Star - Date TBA (Thailand)

👉🏻 Blossom Campus - March TBA (South Korea)

👉🏻 Jazz for Two - March TBA (South Korea)