#unfortunately ofc it often is which sucks hard

[weedle-testaburger]

whenever i read about religion i kind of go 'you know, even if none of this is true, it's pretty neat how humans have come up with these creative explanations for why the world is the way it is, and they're always much more interesting to me than the 'it's all cosmic coincidence now shut up already' attitude that outspoken atheists have'

[limielle]

idk i feel like so much discourse could be easily minimized if people learned to say "i think" instead of "it is"

[tirfpikachu]

this screenshot from another post actually really hit me hard

it's so true... they always do this. trying to make body dysphoria seem inherently worse than body dysmorphia is actually cruel. as someone who developed extremely severe body dysmorphia before dysphoria, i can tell you it's the #1 reason i started hating and harming myself and wanting to die at a young age. i would've 1000% gotten extreme facial plastic surgery to "fix" myself. and while for some it's their road to happiness, if i had it... it personally would've locked me into this fake version of myself, forever wearing a mask. and whenever i'd see someone looking like my past self, a haunting feeling would've come over me. and yet society was encouraging me to "fix" my perceived flaws. it was insanely normalized. it was seen as almost self-care, and a way to better my chances in life as a "prettier" woman. it really fucked me up. you CANNOT look me in the eyes and say shit like "women just want to xyz bc of beauty standards, it's not the same as my much worse severely debilitating dysphoria" without telling my younger self and other young girls that her life-threatening suffering wasn't bad enough, wasn't painful enough, wasn't as bad as anything a trans person goes through. it assumes so fucking much about dysmorphic people. don't brush us off so easily. don't put yourself as inherently in a worse situation when societal misogyny costs real lives. especially since for me, it came from initial bullying at a young age, like many other girls who hate their own bodies & faces. stop belittling our pain.

my dysphoria was very debilitating too, and made me a trans activist for life. but it did come with risks. i developed reverse dysphoria quite quickly after i started growing stubble, and now i'm stuck with that painful dysphoria until i can get expensive laser hair removal. if this is how transfems feel like about their own stubble, holy shit... i'm so fucking sorry. that's a truly horrible feeling. what i can tell you though, is that this is actually a cousin sensation to dysmorphia. dysmorphia & dysphoria aren't as separated as y'all might want them to be, which would make things must simpler ofc. but it's the feeling of visceral disgust, of your body not being good enough, not being you enough. that sucks to think about; we don't want to empower the transphobic crowd into thinking they can magically fix us all. and so, many activists and dysphoric people try to compensate by portraying them as experiences that are completely foreign to one another. as never being related or feeling similar at all, ever. but the thing is, as a previously chronically dysphoric & dysmorphic detrans chick, i can tell you first-hand that it doesn't help anyone to pretend that these aren't often comorbid disorders, and that they actually really do feel similar. and that's okay! no one should take all your treatment options away just because of that. that would be shitty, transphobic, and honestly ableist. but we gotta encourage ppl & their doctors to do due diligence (which my doctor and trans community didn't) and be open to everybody about the risk of regret, of reverse dysphoria, of things not working out the way we think they will. because all that at the very least makes detransitions less painful, even if you personally never detransition. detransitions can lead to very extreme self-hatred, and all the unfortunate consequences of self-hatred. it is a very vulnerable place to be in, and we want to prevent harm. more and more folks are detransitioning because of a lack of information and a focus on celebrating someone's transition early instead of giving proper information. the same should be done with dysmorphic folks - i am both a post-dysphoric and post-dysmorphic person. but many dysmorphic people cannot function without getting surgeries.

and while this is honestly tragic, as anyone needing to go under the knife at all is tragic in a sense... sometimes it is the only life-saving treatment option for the person. for me, i feel so fucking proud of my survival despite years of debilitating disgust at myself, my body and my face. both in a dysphoric and dysmorphic way. but i do not look down on anyone who did have to go through surgeries. i'm just happy to see them smile and feel good about themselves, honestly. but it is a bit bittersweet. how was it, before surgeries, to be dysphoric? to be dysmorphic? i want to read more stories from those eras. how did people find inner peace? did they, in the end? how many didn't survive? what did they have to say? i feel a strange sense of yearning, sometimes. heteropatriarchal society is really weird. it triggers dysmorphia in so many young girls & transmascs. it can also trigger temporary dysphoria in some people, and even permanent dysphoria. and just because certain societal things are a factor in your dysphoria doesn't mean you're lesser for it either - your suffering matters. just like dysmorphic suffering. hating yourself at all is so fucking painful. i wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy, or i'd at least strongly hesitate and they'd need to be an actual monster to deserve it. i love dysphoric & dysmorphic people so fucking much. i don't want us to fight eachother, or shame eachother for seeking treatments when things become too much for us to bear. we need to uplift one another. do everything we can to lessen these feelings in ourselves, of course, as a community of people who hate their bodies and place in society. but if someone chooses to cross over, to take hormones, to have surgeries... i just don't want them to regret it, that's all. and if they don't? if they're happy? i would hug them and breathe a sigh of relief as well. i'd feel bittersweet, almost nostalgic, because i've been there. people who haven't been severely dysphoric or dysmorphic don't fucking understand. hopefully they never will.

[pommunist]

Saw this QSMP crit on twt of how Koreans are treated by the management and man, I didn't even know some of those problems existed. Of course Korean streamers often get the short end in terms of times, but also Chunsik might not speak fluent Korean, which isn't the actor's fault at all, but definitely shows a lack of prep on the management side of things. Heres the link:

op is making a lot of great points in their tweet, and it really sucks that the koreans had to join in such conditions tbh ❤️‍🩹

for chi s’il if i remember correctly (apologies if im wrong bc i haven’t watched qsmp since early larch so i didn’t see a lot of him) his admin wasn’t a native korean speaker the first day and then was replaced with one ? but even if that’s the case they should have had a fluent korean speaker and even ideally a korean actor for him from the start for all the reasons op mentioned

for the timezones i get that it’s gonna be hard to have perfect even hours for everyone since with the koreans arrivals, the ccs are now in a very wide variety of timezones but still ! especially since it was already an issue when the french arrived and even before that spanish ccs and fans had issues with logging on when no one else was on. it could have been solved by adding a bigger batch of ccs from other asian countries/ any countries that are closer timezone wise to korea.

same with letshugo entering it’s kinda weird to me that he was the only german speaker ? ofc qsmp’s goals are to share languages but it still would have been better to have multiple german speakers on

also kinda irrelevant now because of the state of the updates accs but the qsmp twitters don’t link to the qsmpkor acc like they do for the eng/es/fr/pt/global ones so not really helping linking the korean side of the fandom with the rest either

generally yeah the koreans + hugo really joined in bad conditions at the most unfortunate time, once again we’re left grieving what could have been if things had been handled better behind the scenes (obv this is not neg towards the admins, only towards those who make the Big Decisions)

[dreamsy990]

so it all comes to this.

to say i was excited to play 3 would be wrong. actually i was sort of dreading the game. i went in with expectations for the worst and was pleasantly surprised. which is not to say that its good. but its certainly a game! that i played! and now you get my thoughts. unfortunately a lot of my thoughts about the end of the game are kind of hard to separate so. if youre wondering where my thoughts on endgame stuff is. its at the end.

(also i havent played remind so theres no remind thoughts here. its all just base game kh3)

combat (with some other gameplay notes)

so. im not a big fan of the combat. to preface, i played the rest of the series on standard, but with kh3 i was told it was easy so i did proud! and yet it was still the easiest kh game.

kh3 is the first game in the series where i feel as though 'mash x to win' is a valid criticism <- thats not entirely true at the start, but later in the game it does feel a lot like that. almost every fight is mindless because of how easy it is. you can see it in the enemy health bars, theyre absurdly large because of how easy it is to take them down. they need to have that high of health so the fight isnt over in under a minute.

i dont think the base combat is bad. unsatisfying, maybe. But not bad. except for attraction commands.

attraction commands feel like part of a pattern in kh3, where they try to recreate what made the other games so good without understanding WHY it was good. what theyre recreating ofc being reaction commands. technically its the same as some reaction commands, sure, being a giant dramatic attack, but it doesnt work because theres no situational awareness in them.

attraction commands dont feel cool because theres nothing in them that requires use of your surroundings or that is tailored to the enemies youre fighting, since theres only a couple that can be used at any time. there's nothing strategic about using them either- reaction commands normally would give you a specific advantage, or could be used to avoid attacks, only sometimes dealing damage on their own. in kh3, all attractions do is deal damage. they are impersonal and often obtrusive- if youre like me and hate attractions, youll still often accidentally use one, since theres no way to disable them.

this is more abstract than anything, but something about attacking feels unsatisfying. the combat feels like it lacks any real sense of impact or weight to me. but thats all personal and not exactly good criticism so. i digress

also the bosses in 3 suck. you know its bad when the most memorable boss fight in your game is the tutorial. most of the boss fights in this game are so unmemorable that ive literally forgotten them. except of course demon tide. i despise demon tide. it was fine in 0.2 but not here. every time you fight it feels like a missed opportunity for something cooler.

i think flowmotion is worse now. i get that it was a bit too overpowered, but with how much it was limited i ended up hardly using it. i didnt like flowmotion because of the attacks, i liked it because of the movement. so to me, it ended up being a reminder of how kh3 failed instead of a fun feature.

also i know a lot of people like being able to switch keyblades in fights, but honestly i feel like it removes an element of strategy the other games had

the ui (and other visual things)

this isnt something i talked about in my other reviews. but in kh3 i must bring it up. if you follow me you may know my hatred for kh3s ui. so im going to talk about it again! this is the abridged version though. heres my whole rant if you want my full thoughts on it. but the short version is that i dont like it. i am someone with terrible vision and i can play every single kh game without glasses because the ui is just big enough that i can read it. most of the time i can read subtitles too. but in 3? i struggle even WITH glasses to read anything. the ui is too small to make out anything almost all the time. its really only by muscle memory that im able to play. my glasses broke while i was playing, and i literally couldnt play until i got new ones because i couldnt make out a single word on screen. its bad design.

im also upset that there ui art has been replaced with renders. its just a shame honestly. i loved the art in the older games. the renders feel bland in comparison.

and thats generally my take on the look of modern kh. sure its pretty, but its bland. kh has always had a certain cartoonish vibe to it thats starting to die out, and i think the shift to unreal engine was the first marker of that change. i like the look of old kh. its not too technically impressive but its incredibly charming. kh3 is anything but. the characters feel far less expressive, the worlds are realistically rendered, it feels unfitting for a series like kh. its hard for me to find kh3 as charming as the other games. the only word i can think of to really describe it is corporate.

i dont know if this is a rare take, but i think technically impressive visuals are far worse than distinct ones. kh used to have a unique look! now it just looks like every other semi-realistically rendered rpg.

story (featuring: more gameplay notes)

my problem with kh3's story was unavoidable really. dream drop distance set this game up for failure and so im not going to complain about dream drop distance. ANOTHER TIME ill talk about dream drop distance. i dont have time to make a post that long. i do have a lot of problems with the story that werent a result of ddd being terrible so i guess ill just bring up those.

one of my biggest issues with the game is how unimportant the roxas plot is. youre led to believe the game will revolve around it but then sora does nothing to further it. at all. at the start he CONSIDERS doing something, and then hes told by ienzo "no its fine ive got it. go do something else" and its barely ever mentioned again until the end.

this relates to my overarching problem with the plot: it feels aimless. in every kh game theres a REASON theyre going on a journey. soras looking for his friends, roxas is working a 9 to 5, the wayfinders are all following each other, etc. but in kh3 sora is looking for "the power of waking". what is the power of waking? i literally have no clue. thats how poorly defined it is. its an abstract goal, its not tangible or even really achievable. its just a macguffin. when the plot suddenly decides to happen at the end the whole journey feels pointless. you could skip every disney world past twilight town and you would probably be fine. it's not a journey, you're not exploring for a purpose, you're just killing time until other people handle the plot.

i also really hate the new organization (i refuse to call them the real organization. theyll never be the org). theyre painfully boring and poorly put together. the old org had structure, they had very specific goals, every member had a purpose. you knew how they worked and why they did what they did. the new org is just completely lacking in that. calling it an 'organization' is stupid because there's nothing organized about it. and even disregarding all that, the new organization also lacks any real personality. the members feel so boring, which sucks, because almost all of them are returning characters who used to be really fun. and why are most of them even there? no one except maybe xigbar seems to actually care about their mission. the old organization had a common goal and a reason everyone was there. they were nobodies, they wanted their hearts back. there's no reason for any of the new members to stick with xehanort. and if you say "well they were norted!" i then must ask. what exactly is norting? like really. it hasnt been possession since birth by sleep. norting is whatever nomura needs it to be in the moment. its not clearly defined, its just another macguffin.

also because i dont know where to put it, the battle of 10,000 heartless is just a terrible successor to the original fight. there's no stakes, no buildup, no friends fighting by your side, no reason to care. they just throw thousands of heartless with no ai at you. literally no ai, if you stand still they wont attack you. its a drag if anything, an homage to a better game done absolutely no justice.

back to what i was saying about the roxas plot, roxas' return is just such a nothing scene. theres nothing about it thats cathartic, his lines are impersonal and bland, theres nothing 'roxas' about it. roxas' defining feature has always been how emotional he is, and there's none of that here. its nothing. and then he does nothing afterwords. he has seven whole lines in this entire game, six of them are in this scene, and the last one is an inconsequential jab at sora at the very end. and then he fades into the background.

the writing in this game in general is actually weirdly worse than normal. it feels a lot less, idk, human? the older games were weird and absurdly cheesy but this is just. strange. look at the scenes with riku and mickey in the realm of darkness and youll see what i mean.

WHILE IM ON THAT SUBJECT. RIKUS KEYBLADE BREAKING IS BULLSHIT. remind me to rant about that another time though im not gonna go on a tangent about that here

also i would give my thoughts on the ending but i literally couldnt care less about xehanort. so i dont really have any! the final boss was alright though

i have more specific thoughts, but generally, the game feels aimless and underwhelming.

positives

i love axel and kairi! theyre a fun duo and ill never shut up about their parallels so seeing them together is nice. i wish they did anything but thats BESIDES the point im being POSITIVE here

also. the music is great. i love the music sm. its nowhere near my favorite kh soundtrack, it feels a lot more grand which isnt my thing but its still some of yoko shimomuras best work. also hearts as one. its the PERFECT conclusion to roxas' theme and arc. the progression of it from melancholic (roxas) to desperate (the other promise) to triumphant (hearts as one) is just so good. i wish the rest of this scene was as good as the music so i could compliment it more wholeheartedly yknow?

its actually funny also! kh isnt the funniest series, most of the time when it IS funny its completely on accident. but kh3 is like days in the way that it just. actually has funny writing. the jokes intended DO land and its just a breath of fresh air.

oh also riku being well adjusted is the funniest possible conclusion to his character arc. 10/10 im so happy hes normal. never give that boy an emo arc again nomura

conclusion

over all, kh3 is exactly like how my teachers described me in elementary school: it has a lot of potential, but doesnt apply itself. this couldve been a decent game but it simply doesnt do most things very well. i give it a 5.2 / 10. its not an actively bad game but its a game i have trouble enjoying. sidenote im retconning my opinion on bbs to say its 4.7 / 10 because a: my opinions have changed and b: i think 3 is better but i dont want to give it a very high score.

[peachkkuma]

📓. DIARY ENTRY 05 ︴APRIL 30, 2024

dear loass diary…

though April has treated me well, reflecting on the month led to an accidental reflection on my loass journey. as I was reflecting on this month, I was a little down because “it didn’t reflect in the 3D”. I know, seeking confirmation in the 3D is stupid but ofc I felt a little deflated. Anyways, that’s not what made me open up tumblr and start typing an entry. I remembered that thoughts are reflections of ur state and my thoughts were all anxious and worried and intimidated in regards to my desire. Stuff like “omg aprils already over and it still hasn’t manifested.” that’s a clear indicator that I’m not 🙅‍♀️🚫 in the sowf like I thought I was. I think often times I take me intending on being in the sowf as me actually being in the sowf. But there’s a difference, it’s either ur in the sowf or ur not. And after that realization, at first I was like “this sucks, why can’t I just be in the sowf? Why is it so hard for me?” I don’t blame myself for thinking that, it felt like I was more out of the sowf then I was in it. But then I started to actually ask myself, why can’t I be in the sowf? What’s stopping me? Nothing but me. Whenever I think “ugh other ppl become fulfilled so easily why is it so hard for me?!!” I never expand on it. I never actually think about it, and if I had, I would’ve realized it’s not hard. I just wasn’t letting myself, it was more familiar and comfortable to just be hung up on the fact that I can’t get into the sowf “correctly”, which just comes from how I think that I can’t manifest deep deep down. anywaysss, another thing is that I’m so obsessed with being in the sowf but not for a good reason. Though I don’t like to admit it because it goes against the law and my understanding of it, I am unfortunately and seemingly unconsciously obsessed with getting what I want in the 3D. Is it because I’ve been in the loa community for so long? Is it desperation? Or is it because the inner man is starving? Who knows, all I know is that I need to change my intentions. Even when I tell myself the 3D doesn’t matter, I do it to detach for the sole purpose of making my manifestation coming faster in the 3D. I just know all the loa bloggers would be sick of me bro, I would be too ‼️‼️🗣️🗣️ cuz this is just stupid. The innate desire to experience things in the 3D has yet to be replaced by the satisfaction and relief of imagination. I think it’s cuz I just don’t imagine as much as I think I should. I want to start imagining more, so the inner man won’t starve and I can actually identify with having what I want. And not just to get things, but so I don’t have to feel bad about the 3D. This time I want to detach myself from the 3D not to make things come faster but so I can actually thrive in imagination. I think I’m tricking myself. I think that part of me is fooled into thinking that when I imagine I’m secretly doing it for the 3d. But the part of me with a better understanding of the law, a smaller but growing part, knows that I’m imagining so I can actually experience what I want to experience. Idk, I can’t shake the feeling like I’m lying to myself. Like when I say I’m doing it for fulfillment I’m actually doing it for the 3D, I don’t mean it like that but for some reason I think it. But I need to realize that it is possible for me to do things without the purpose being the 3D. I also realize that no matter how much I cry beg scream plead or whatever the 3D isn’t changing because I’m not the one physically changing it. The only, ONLY, way is for me to change self. So why can’t I do that without worrying about the 3d????? I hate that I’m not having a full circle moment rn.

I’m asking myself why do I get so upset when the 3D doesn’t change, and the answer is because I’m changing self with the intention of changing the 3D. And in that way, I’m not changing self at all. So howwwww do I stop obsessing over the 3D? I think this is just coming from me “failing” at manifesting and never seeing an actual desire manifest into the 3D, so I feel kinda helpless. But if I want to experience it, I don’t need the 3D for that. And that is what imagination is for, giving yourself what the 3D can’t. And if u persist in that imaginal identity, if u keep saying “that is me” in regards to it, the 3D changes because you’ve changed. Because why should u let go of the identity u love? Why not persist in it?

Yooooooo everything just clicked for me let’s goooooo bro

okay I lowkey sound like I’m tweaking here 😭😭 this is more of a rant, that’s why it’s unorganized and has a ton of spelling errors but at least I was able to apply my knowledge and soothe my worries 😜

long story short, safe to say I’m no longer questioning the role of the 3D and imagination

kisses, peachkkuma

(just looked back at this and GOOD GRIEF this is long I gotta take it to a publisher or something god 😭😭 chatterbox ahh tumblr post)

[wrongcaitlyn]

not fic related but i know you are an editor (i follo you on insta!!) but i wanted to ask you how did you start editing and most importantly how did you learn? i’ve always wanted to start editing bc i just have sooo many ideas but i can never figure out where to start and what programs to use. what would you recommend?

ahh omg yes!!! AN EDITING QUESTION god i havent talked about editing in so long even tho im trying to get back into itskldjf

(for those who don't know, i do have an editing insta and tt acc (though i'm not active on tt)!!! @/thae.rchxr on insta and thaerchxr on tt)

i started editing in 2020 during quarantine, and on capcut! i think that it's a pretty good starting spot, especially because it's free and it allows you to understand what you really want to make with your edits/what kinds of edits you want to make - velocities, lyric edits, transition ones, etc

i have to say i wouldn't recommend templates and i'm really not a fan of them. that's my only neg abt capcut now, even though i don't use it... yea i've seen too much of these template apps literally stealing the hard work of editors and it sucks

but anyway!! i currently use after effects, and have used it since early 2022, however it's a computer program, and - though you can pirate it and there are lots of videos online on how to do that - it also costs money if you don't wanna pirate (i got it as a christmas gift so i have the paid version but there's really no difference)

no matter what program you use, TUTORIALS!! youtube is your best friend. i have a youtube channel actually but i mainly post transition inspo instead of tutorials, however if you want some recs (for ae, i unfortunately don't know a lot of tutorial channels for other apps), i learned so much from klqvsluv, ae.chambb, and clewxdre on youtube! and, of course, lauren. she's kind of a mini celebrity in the editing communitysdklf - and there are so many more as well

if it's transition edits you're specifically trying to get into, def try and master the basics - zoom in's, out's, slide left/right, shakes and turbs if that's the kind of edit you wanna make. but honestly, the entire thing is just practice practice practice!! even though i only started editing on ae 2 years ago, i used to make edits, like, every day. i was obsessed. i would wake up and spend hours on edits, trying new transitions and new plugins and effects, and i think it really paid off :)

another thing you can do is attempt to remake edits! most editors will be completely alright with it (as long as you don't steal, ofc) and many even put out project files (i do have a few on my payhip- linked in my insta lmfaodjsf shameless self promo) that you can look at to see how they did certain transitions. remakes are good because it takes out the factor of having to figure out what transitions you want to make and lets you focus entirely on the technical aspect - which will then make it easier for you to pull off the transitions you think of yourself!

so, to conclude this ramble bc i can never shut up - i think i would definitely recommend ae if you have a computer/laptop. but i also think that other editing apps (the ones i see most often are videostar, alight motion, and capcut - all of which are mobile apps) can make absolutely incredible edits. i have friends who use each of these different editing apps and i know they can make some of the most mindblowing edits, even though i personally have no idea how to use vs or am lmaodsjf

so it's up to you! look at some tutorials, don't feel too intimidated, and go with the layout that makes the most sense to you. then just don't be afraid of making a "bad" edit bc let's be real the first edits are alwaysss shitty. i cringe when looking back at the edits all the way to last summer. but that's the beauty of it, because you can see your editing style and skill grow over time, and then you can eventually make edits that you'll be really proud of <3 i wish you the best of luck on your editing journey!! it's honestly so fun once you get into the swing of it :)

[ladymorghul]

It's really funny that Helaemond is still so hated by many greens and is often mentioned as a possible reason that could even make them stop watching the show. Ofc, I doubt they would stop watching it, they're mostly being dramatic. But still, making Helaemond canon by the showrunners would be, apparently, the worst thing ever🙄 and would irreparably ruin the greens.

However, these haters almost always ignore the fact that if any ship could ruin or seriously harm not only the greens but the show in general, it's Rh*enicent. And I really have an impression that the showrunners' idea of Rh*enicent is the one most TB fans have: the one where Alicent is constantly apologetic and subservient to Rhaenyra at the expense of her own family. Idk if those leaks are true, but even the possibility of Alicent and Rhaenyra's meeting at Dragonstone in the season finale irritates me. And the funny thing is, it really could happen given the show's nonsensical pushing of the ship that lost any meaning after the time skip. The seeds are unfortunately planted in episodes 8 and 9. But no, Helaemond is the biggest problem for the greens' storylines, according to my fellow greens. Right. Honestly, even though I would really like to see Helaemond happen on screen (in my version of Helaemond the children are still Aegon's, at least the twins), I don't have much hope anymore. I'm almost sure, however, that we'll see a lot of Rh*enicent inspired nonsense. I mean, what indelible harm could Helaemond possibly do to the greens? Imo it could (if done right ofc) only give more depth and complexity to Helaena and Aemond's characters. If the children's paternity and legitimacy is the problem for the antis (since some of green fans desperately want Helaena to be morally superior to Rhaenyra and a good and faithful wife™️ to Aegon no matter what) the children could still be Aegon's because Helaemond doesn't automatically mean that Jaehaerys and Jaehaera are Aemond's bastards. And Rh*enicent? I don't see how it could be good for the show since it would only further ruin Alicent for the reasons I mentioned above and wouldn't be helpful to Rhaenyra's character either. The pushing of that ship will only perpetuate the "evil patriarchy, evil men, poor manipulated women" narrative, which is honestly quite insulting and oversimplified for the story like this. And still, even Rh*enicent is more welcome in green spaces than Helaemond. Why, I'll never understand.

Sorry for this long rant.

hello.

you are so right and i very much agree with everything you said. everyone who follows my blog knows that i talked about this a million times and i did acknowledge and address some of the fears the greens have when it comes to helaemond but it's also hard to ignore the double standard and hypocrisy, just like you point out.

also rhaen*cent isn't just welcomed in green spaces, a huge chunk of the greens fandom ships them which is laughable for them to then turn around and talk about how helaemond would ruin the greens. rhaen*cent, from green fandom pov, doesn't even get 1/10 of the shit helaemond gets.

as for hopes for helaemond... i would write it off completely yet. unlike the fans of one certain ship who always claim they know what will happen, i can't claim the same. i'm not a writer for the show, i don't know what they have planned, but i have a feeling there could be a possibility of more helaemond in season 2. personally i will wait and see, these writers are not exactly consistent so who knows what to expect for them but if anything helaemond in season 1 was written with clear romantic subext and intent.

when it comes to rhaen*cent, we will certainly see more of it. they are very set on focusing on this ship so i fully expected it to be central to the story going forward, regardless of whether i like it or not. it sucks from many povs but i am fully aware that the writers are committed to this.

the claim that they'll stop watching if helaemond is canon... i mean it's their choice and they should do so if they want to but it's amusing because first of all, a lot of them will tune in regardless and this is all bark (remember when people were saying they won't watch hotd because of got s8? right...), but even if they don't, they are a very small portion of hotd audience and it won't really matter.

[voiceofsword]

sry to bitch in your inbox abt this but im so glad you pointed out how so many modern enstarries Dont read the stories and base everything off fandom perception.. i saw these users joking about which character would say slurs and someone was ADAMANT rinne would and tho i knew it before it Really struck me then

a) none of them have ever engaged with this text in any meaningful way, ESPECIALLY not the first games' stories, because surprise! characters in es! did Canonically use slurs! and back then Nobody Liked It. we didnt joke about it. most people i know completely stopped paying attention to the characters who did until they apologized. (tho ofc its more a problem w the writing than the characters, but still. we were young. we had the spirit.)

b) people really like using rinne as a punching bag because they dont read the stories and know literally nothing about him except funny drunk drugs gamble man "fuckboy" who harasses niki and the other bees and its. infuriating.

i dont understand how anyone can claim to like a media without ever properly engaging with it, i dont understand how people have fun misunderstanding characters so drastically, and i also think joking about slurs has gotten wayyy too normalized where people feel comfortable saying these things about these characters they allegedly like. and characters like rinne (with a constructed mask of obnoxiousness and such) are the perfect target for these people. which SUCKS. all of it sucks.

NEVER BE SORRY!!!! i hope this is alright to post i thought your ask was good and insightful and i'll add onto it a little bit with my own thoughts (heart emoji)

yeah um ! was definitely a ride. i wouldnt recommend it to everyone but at least we have hindsight and things like slurs and general offensive terms/behaviors can be warned for, so that much is nice. i remember being really upset about a few of these, and then getting back into enstars earlier this year and reading a few of the more current stories + !! stories i was happy to see that the writing has developed CONSIDERABLY in terms of this especially after beasts. something ive noticed a lot of newer fans do (referencing my previous post irt the feeling morally superior) is that if you like a specific character for whatever reason youre actually a horrible person because that character said something awful once. of course youre allowed to dislike characters for whatever reason but dont tell other people they should perish because they like them (as if liking them means you implicitly agree with said views, more often than not One line in a miriad of stories that you might not even have read). but like you said, characters making ignorant comments (an unfortunate occurrence, although rare, it still happens) is not a reflection of 2d pixels on a screen but rather a team of writers..... idk. its a complicated situation. i see both sides and i think people are justified in liking or disliking but this is a game about idol boys (and girl) got dam

yeah i hate how people treat rinne a lot. like because characters like him and eichi are villains that means everything that they do or say is, at worst, a straight, physical threat to everyone around them, or at best, an annoyance that can make the fandom feel justified in making them the butt of reoccurring jokes. idk what else to say about him that i havent said already but its also 3 am now and i SAID i was gonna go to sleep an hour ago but i think i might just be a filthy liar

ALSO its probably because enstars is long, there's a lot to read and although tl's arent necessarily hard to come by you actively have to seek them out. again i understand how this might be a nuisance but instead of sitting down and listening to summaries or analysis ive noticed that a lot of short form consumption content lends itself to people just. posting the most reactive interpretations, and people playing a game of telephone with said information until a lot of the fandom has come to accept this misinformation as true. LIKE SOMEONE ON TIKTOK SAYING HAJIME AND WATARU WERE RELATED? IDEK IF THAT WAS A JOKE OR NOT? and yeah the use of slurs is like ridiculously normalized now im not one to say whether people can or cannot reclaim slurs and people are free to do as they like if they can. i see this one thing specifically with tatsumi a lot where people jokingly bring up how said character is homophobic or make homophobic comments towards characters even if theyre being like. excited or happy. and idk. personally it makes me sad. like maybe its fandom culture now maybe im old (is 23)

WHY WOULD RINNE SAY SLURS HES LITERALLY GAY AND IN LOVE....COME AWN NOW

[mesmerium]

Dont mind me just dumping my 2.5/5 star review of s1x of cr0w5 here because i need to get this off my chest 😭

I consider myself a very average person in the sense that i, more often than not, like what’s popular. Usually i agree with the majority and even when i don’t, i still see the appeal and just go, “ok, not for me.” But this book was terrible. I fail to see what people actually like about it…… and it’s not like i picked it up because of the rave reviews, my sister let me borrow it because she liked it. I didn’t check other ratings or reviews at all, so when i finally finished it (a feat in and of itself) and went to log it onto my goodreads, i was shocked by how much love it received lol. Yes i am 27 but i still do like YA, so that wasn’t the issue here

Starting with the good: i think b4rdug0 did decently with her prose and worldbuilding, settings and people were described well enough that i wasn’t TOO confused. That and w¥lan and j3sp3r’s banter were the only things i liked.

Getting it out of the way that although i would’ve preferred them to be aged up, it’s not really something i cared about much. A lot of the people who didn’t like the book complained about this, but other than them having too much experience for the years they have lived on this planet, i just shrugged it off because eh, it’s YA. Ofc there will be some sort of power fantasy involving teens.

For the plot, i was so excited for it because heists are fun and it’s amazing when the tension is set up right!!! Alas, everything was too conveniently resolved. Just as you think the tension can finally be built, the scene is over. Or something is happening omg, and then you’re hit with a flashback that completely takes you out of it. Don’t even know what the stakes were for this operation. It sucks how predictable a lot of the conflicts were :’) the appeal of a heist is when you don’t know what will happen, when you’re a hair’s breadth from getting caught but you don’t.. didn’t feel that at all here. It almost felt like they just waltzed in and out

The characters felt SO flat to me. Some of them felt like caricatures while the others were simply trying too hard to be edgy, and some felt like an afterthought (ahem, w¥lan). None of them are likable, which is fine i don’t need to like characters honestly, but unlikable to the point of me not being invested in them at all. I didn’t care what happened to any of them. Their relationships with each other don’t feel important enough, and then they’re all paired up… huh? I don’t care enough about nin4 x matth14s, the author didn’t care enough about j3sper x w¥lan. In3j and k4z would’ve been ok if the author set it up well enough. It would’ve been nicer if it were a bit more of a slow burn, perhaps their relationship picking up in the second book. WHY did she have to force it to happen in the first?????? It felt so out of character honestly, like you set up k4z that way and then you tell me he acts like this…… if there were moments prior wherein k4z would act contrary to how people thought he was then it would’ve been believable. But legitimately his behavior blindsided me lol.

Nin4 being plus sized could’ve been handled better too. Oh i like eating, i’m indecently round (LIKE WHAT IS THIS), my jugs are big. What in the world

The use of foreign language feels… kinda forced and clunky? I’m all for worldbuilding, and it’s great that there’s diversity in this fictional world, but the foreign languages aren’t used in any way that furthers the narrative. It’s jarring, like when someone is speaking in an american english accent and then says croissant as cwahsahn. D

Anyway i’m surprised i finished it. Had to skim the last 50 pages because i just wanted to see how it would end. Kinda expected the “twist” unfortunately. Also i cannot take anyone named p3kk4 r0llin5 seriously as a villain lmao

[artinandwritin]

Bestie I've been thinking the same thing as well cuz honestly it's so funny and in character for the hooligans i cannot

For Spitelout, Sven, Bucket, Mulch and Gothi it's basically a "doing your job at daylight, fighting evil by moonlight" situation, cuz we see them all doing different things most often in their day to day life

Sven, Bucket, Mulch and Gothi are also basically "fuck around and find out" during the training montage. We've never seen them with dragons before, and mainly Gothi is a real wild card, which honestly fits so well for her character

Even Spitelout makes a little less sense if we keep in mind he's also part of Stoick's council and presumably has to keep things in check where Stoick can't (brief interruption, but I recently watched the RTTE episodes where Spitelout and Hiccup spend time with the singetails on the store house island and fuckity fuck Spitelout has really lost his effing mind??? He's gone crazy and not in a good way, no-one should allow him in a position of power a n d we see that he basically defies Stoick's order to Gustav, who has a rally the A-Team but Spitelout is nowhere to be seen cuz he openly r u n s o f f to his store house island, so I guess the moral is Spitelout not only sucks at being a father he also sucks at being in a position of power and in a team)

Plus, Bucket and Mulch are fishermen and fishermen are known to be at sea more often than not to, y'know,,, catch fish. It wouldn't really make sense for them to join a team where they could basically only help out so many times due to not being on the island to hear about threats

Silent Sven kinda makes sense in having time on Berk, he's a farmer after all. However, he's also shown to be on Stoick's council and would basically have the same position as Spitelout. Yeah idk how much time that's gonna leave for him, but he's shown to be pretty good with his Dragon i guess??

Gothi ofc has things to do as the healer and doing old lady things, which wouldn't help in battle when multiple people are wounded and need her medical attention. She can't be fighting and do healing at the same time unfortunately even with how badass she is (funfact, my mom and I were watching the three HTTYD movies last week for funsies and we were rooting for Gothi so hard. My mom had no idea how she was portrayed in RTTE but loved the idea of her being a terrible terror lady)

If we go over those things, really the only person who has the time to be in the A-Team is Gustav. Baby boi has no responsibility except to the A-Team, has the energy cuz he's young and is in a position to learn a whole lot of shit from being in the A-Team (and its kinda sad how at that point his only friends are adults and Fanghook. Give that kid some friends man)

Okay this turned out way longer than it had to be lmao, but I've been thinking about the A-Team for years now and how much it doesn't make sense for certain characters to be on it. At some point, the A-Team is gonna be called upon for defending Berk and only Gustav is available lmao. Poor kid

Can we please please please talk about the fact that the A Team (Berk's only on island defence system for like 5 seasons of RTTE) is made up of

Spitelout (Fine, life long warrior)

Gustav (Fine, has ridden and trained his dragon before)

Silent Sven (A regular sheep farmer and who has never ridden a dragon before)

Bucket and Mulch (Regular fishermen who have never ridden a dragon before))

Gothi (Literally so old and the only healer Berk has)

[binunus]

college bf!eunwoo

a/n I LOVE HIM !! I WOULD LITERALLY RISK IT ALL FOR HIM !! also rip to the disappointing hookup experience I had that made an appearance in this headcanon...yes I’m still angry about it.

→ pairing: eunwoo x f!reader

→ genre: smut, fluff, fwb to lovers

→ tw: hookup culture, mentions of drinking and drug use, implied almost SA, this is a bit heavy compared to the other ones like please be a cautious a little when you’re reading this

→ word count: 5.6k

_______________________________

here we go ladies and gents

i had something completely different planned for this

and it was super angsty and dramatic

but i had a monumental experience last night so I’m changing this up

and okay okay

i usually try to write all my stuff gender neutral but bc of the idea I have for some of this plot, it’s gonna be a female reader

im sorry to all my male identifying loves :(

and back to our regularly scheduled program

cha motherfuckin eunwoo

lee fuckin dongmin

he doesn’t go by dongmin, he prefers to go by eunwoo, only his family calls him dongmin

as soon as he stepped foot into the university, everyone knew him

and I mean everyone

he’s so attractive

but don’t get it twisted, eunwoo’s the humblest, sweetest bean

he gets very embarrassed when people compliment him for his looks

applied for random roommates his first year and got paired up with swimmer!bin

he and bin become besties and end up rooming together their entire college career

major: music performance, specialty in piano

most people (besides those in the music department or astro) would have never thought eunwoo was a music major, especially since he was incredibly smart and athletic too???

usually gets mistaken for a STEM major

often helps the boys (especially rocky and sanha) with their studies

and oof when he tries out for–and makes it into–the basketball team

everyone ???? floored

eunwoo has game on the court...now with dating??? eh not so much

(at least not sober shh)

he’s tried dating before, at least in the first year or so

the basketball team kept trying to set him up with people

but it never got anywhere substantial and eunwoo always trusted astro to really give the vibe check and no one ever passed

and so he settled for hookup culture every now and then

his emotions are guarded :’(

yes he’s very easy to talk to and always so nice and well mannered

but he’s only himself with astro

now, where do you come into this???

you’re a cheerleader

you and eunwoo know each other by association

you cheer for his home games, you’ve been in a couple of classes together, you’ve seen each other at parties

but would you call yourselves friends?? not really

now you know it’s highly unlikely for you to have a lasting boyfriend in college, especially with your affiliation as a cheerleader, so you also opt for hookup culture

less messy feelings, less drama, less commitment, all that fun

so the first time your paths really intertwine with eunwoo is at a party

the basketball team won a big game and they were out celebrating yuh

and ofc since it’s his team, eunwoo popped out

he only really attends parties hosted by the basketball team bc he feels a bit obligated to go LOL but he always brings swimmer!bin for support 

and it’s chill bc bin is also an athlete–yes it’s exclusive like that

but this time, bin couldn’t go so it’s just eunwoo hanging with his team

and yes, you can guess it, you and him get partnered up to play beer pong together!

that’s so cliche omg

but ah ha you hear your opponent, one of eunwoo’s teammates say to one of your fellow cheerleaders: don’t worry baby, I’ll carry you through this game

and you cringed a little ugh men

eunwoo turns to you like: ah sorry if we lose, it’s all luck with me. The guys usually pick to play me bc I’ll probably lose. I’ll drink the cups for you though if you want me to.

you get a little fired up, like aw why do they pick on him that’s not fair

you: well I’m not horrible at pong, so let’s try to crush em

he played pretty well ok! you both got balls back twice in a row right in the beginning

your team was on a roll

you and eunwoo won three games back to back

you were feeling a bit bloated and hazy from the beer that you and him had to drink, but you were still pretty self aware

and you and eunwoo were just chilling after playing the games, you two were on a pretty good wavelength and you wanted to continue it after joking around in between plays

alright now obviously you don’t go into these parties just strictly looking for a hookup, you go to have fun and let loose

but if the person and situation arises??? you wouldn’t necessarily turn it down, especially if that person was cha eunwoo

and yeah, eunwoo was entertaining the idea too, it’s been a while since he vibed with someone like he has with you

basically by the end of the night, you brought him back to your place–you’d rather eat shit than hook up at the basketball house, it was messy and musty and just nope

your place was closer than his

and ~yuh~

it was pretty damn good

he didn’t stay the night, bc well this was a hookup, so after you both had your fill it was a casual alright see you around!

oh lord the fuss your cheerleading team gave you at the next practice asking how your hookup with eunwoo was

the news spread like wildfire

eunwoo didn’t hook up very often so every time he did, it was like breaking news

which is honestly a bit fucked up, but seriously this is how college is

alright so your sex drive skyrocketed after fucking eunwoo 

you hook up with another guy at one of the following parties

but it didn’t compare to eunwoo rip so you were pretty disappointed

and you were sorta wondering like hm? should you hit him up? but decided against it 

and then! you saw him at the gym working out with literally all of astro

bin probably forced the other 4 to come with him and eunwoo sksksksk

and you were like shit why does he look so good

not gonna lie, just in case he was looking over, you tried to make your ass and tits pop out a bit more, you know squats and shit

unfortunately, it caught the attention of other guys at the gym and not eunwoo grrr

and you were literally just planning to stop being a coward and go up and talk to him, but a guy blocked your path

and he was lowkey being very creepy and way too close for your liking

but you weren’t having it, hell no you ain’t a damsel in distress

being a cheerleader taught you how to defend yourself against predatory men

so you were basically telling him to fuck off and leave you alone, but he was being really damn persistent about it

and just as the guy was about to put a hand on you, eunwoo steps in and he’s like: dude, she’s clearly not interested, fuck off.

after a bit of a stare off, the guy leaves and wow you’re face to face with eunwoo again hehehe

his eyes switch from a glare to a soft worried look and he’s like, hey are you okay?

and you’re like a little giddy, maybe also a little bit turned on bc he’s still like fresh from a workout, his hair was brushed back revealing his forehead, his arm muscles were really defined right now, and just he’s so hot? 

but you smile nonchalantly, you genuinely could have just slapped the shit out of the guy or kicked him right in the baby factory, but eunwoo stepping in was also a pleasant surprise, you weren’t complaining

you: yeah. I could have handled it, but thanks for helping

and he just grins, your confidence?? attractive

the two of you just like look at each other for a couple seconds and you’re yelling at yourself in your head like don’t cop out this is what you were waiting for !!

you: so...you’re here with your friends?

eunwoo: yeah, me and my roommate forced them to come work out with us haha. did you come by yourself?

you: yeah, I usually work out with my teammates, but I decided to come alone today

eunwoo nods and you see him like look at your neck and you immediately get a bit shy bc you knew there was a hickey there from your last (very disappointing) hookup: you’ve been having fun recently?

your face flushes: the last one was embarrassing really, so honest to god no

eunwoo: why was it embarrassing? if...you don’t mind me asking

you immediately facepalm: no, yeah I don’t mind telling you...ugh, eunwoo I was literally catfished. this guy really talked mad game about his dick and then when I agreed to hook up, he asked me to suck him off and it literally only took him less than ten minutes. and after he came, he just pulled up his pants and said “damn you give really good head” like the fuck? he didn’t even offer to return the favor or anything, and when I asked him “wait, are we gonna fuck?” he just said “maybe next time.” maYbE neXt tiMe?? I was played so hard, you have no idea how pissed I was, eunwoo. and now I have to wait for his dumb fucking hickey to heal so that I can literally just repress that hookup even happened.

his jaw literally dropped: he didn’t give you anything?

you shook your head, you were getting pissed again 

eunwoo couldn’t believe his ears, he glances back at astro for a second and then he clears his throat: well...what are you doing after the gym?

you: nothing, just going home and taking a shower. My roommate’s not gonna be home tonight so I’m probably gonna wallow in my sorrows about that hookup again

he laughs: well sounds like you have a fun night planned, but if you want some company?? I’d be more than happy to come over and help you forget about the sad disrespect of that hookup.

who said eunwoo couldn’t flirt ???

and he was thinking about hitting you up again too before but he didn’t wanna seem like a fuckboy or anything

but seeing you defend yourself against the guy?? lowkey was a bit of turn on for him

obviously you agreed hello

eunwoo going up to astro: so uh...imma head out first...I’ll see you guys later. :)

sanha: hyung so scandalous *O*

you and eunwoo fuck again

and after this time, the two of you have a little bit of pillow talk

basically you tell him that fucking him ruined all other guys for you bc he was just that good

and eunwoo usually gets shy from compliments, but his ego with this one??? he felt a bit proud ohohoho

and he’s like: honestly, you’re the only person I’ve fucked in six months, but I gotta agree that our sexual chemistry is pretty good

so where do you two go from there?

friends with benefits baby, full on fuck buddies

you both talk and agree that you two weren’t looking for relationships at the moment, but the sex was good

i’m gonna get into specifics later, but for now a little more plot

obviously, you and eunwoo talk a lot more now that you two were basically fucking each other at least once a week

the guys notice that he’s so much more?? carefree?? less stressed out?? ever since you and him started your little agreement

and they’re already scheming by themselves, like eunwoo would not get into a situation like this unless he trusted you as a person

and at first it was really just, call each other over, have sex, stay for a little bit longer, then leave

neither of you ever stayed the night bc that’s just an unspoken rule

until there was this one party, a group of people were in one of the rooms at the basketball house and they told you to come join them and ~do drugs~

don’t dabble kids, I’m serious

and you were chilling with eunwoo and bin for a bit until they called you over and you were like: wanna try too?

eunwoo and bin didn’t do it obviously, but you were curious so you went and told them you would be back in a bit

eunwoo was worried about you, bin could see it from a mile away

he kept glancing back at the room and one by one people started to come out, but none of them were you

bin nudging eunwoo: go check up on her

eunwoo opens the door to see you being like pinned down on the bed and he turns livid

he pulls the guy off you and punches him right in the face like: what the fuck do you think you’re doing? what did you give her?

you’re noticeably out of it, sobriety? not there

the guy basically laced something in the drug he gave you, omg you were roofied??

bin comes in and he literally has to hold eunwoo back from beating the shit out of the other guy

the two take you back to their apartment and were making sure that you didn’t die or something shit

literally cannot believe the first time you slept over at eunwoo’s place was when you were drugged up

you wake up the next morning, nauseous, body weak, and confused

eunwoo also wakes up because of your movement: hey y/n, are you okay?

you: eunwoo...what...what happened last night??

he sits up and gives you a recount of the party and you just like hug your body tightly when he brings up the drugs and start crying

he’s a bit shocked when he sees your tears, but he just pulls you in for a hug to try and comfort you, obviously that must have been a bit traumatic

eunwoo: hey...it’s okay...I’m just glad I checked up on you before something worse happened

you: I’m such a fucking idiot...I can’t believe I let myself get put in that situation again...no wonder people think I’m a just a dumb whore.

~trauma~

you and him spill your deepest darkest most traumatizing secrets that morning and you just feel more connected to him

you: I honestly never really told anyone...thanks eunwoo, you’re a good friend.

he feels more protective of you after that??

you start hanging around with him and astro more

and the guys really like having you around !!

you’re very easy to get along with, you also joke and tease eunwoo with them, they love you !

you even become really friendly with the other guys’ partners

about half a year into your fuck buddy relationship with eunwoo

everyone: why aren’t you dating y/n yet?

eunwoo: what do you mean?? we’re just friends...with benefits??

before you even know it, you’re spending literally all your time (when you’re not training or practicing or at class) with eunwoo and his friends

you sleep more at eunwoo’s than you do at your own apartment

honestly you two are already acting like a couple

except for the fact that you only kiss each other when you’re fucking, or you don’t hold hands in public, or you don’t say the L word to each other obviously

but the cuddles? the jokes? the hanging out? if you two are seen together there’s still a little form of physical touch––like a hand on the waist, or resting his elbow on your shoulder––something that tells other people that you two are a bit exclusive to each other

and maybe it’s because both of your emotional capacities when it comes to relationships are akin to a pubescent thirteen year old, but you and eunwoo?? don’t really realize that you’re both basically in love with each other

and it’s also the fact that catching feelings in a friends with benefits?? forbidden

but what if both people catch feelings?

you don’t realize you like eunwoo until a year of fucking each other

damn a year?? y’all really suppressed those romantic feelings hard

you and him were hanging out, per usual, but in the piano rooms of the music building

eunwoo had to practice his repertoire for an upcoming performance and you were free so you decided to come along and keep him company

you knew he was a music major and that he played piano, but you never actually heard him play

you were just chilling by the window, scrolling through your phone, and then he just starts playing and your jaw?? literally dropped

it was so intricate and fluid and elegant, you looked over to the keys and his hands just moved so expertly over them

you were put in a trance, it was so beautiful??

and then you look up and his concentration? seriousness? he has honestly never looked more attractive to you than in that moment

and then eunwoo meets your eyes and he smiles a little: is it bad?

you: no, you’re amazing actually...

and your stomach does a triple somersault and your cheeks start heating up, like why is your heart going haywire???

you start spacing out and obviously he notices

eunwoo calls your name and pats the space next to him on the piano bench

eunwoo: what are you thinking of, hm?

you: n-nothing. keep playing, I wanna hear more

and so he does and your heart just won’t chill out, especially now that you’re literally sitting mere centimeters apart from him

he’s still playing and you just can’t stop thinking about how much you want to kiss him–and not in a sexual way

and that honestly scared you, so you panicked and put your hand near his crotch

eunwoo jolts in surprise, but he doesn’t say anything, he just chuckles and continues playing

do you have sex in the piano room to try and distract yourself from whatever you were feeling? yeah

you hide your feelings for a little bit, but the more time you spent with him, the stronger they got, and you honestly didn’t know what to do

so you tried distancing yourself, you gave eunwoo the excuse that cheerleading competitions were coming up–which they were, so it wasn’t a complete lie–and you needed to focus and have time to yourself

it was so weird for you not seeing him and astro all the time, you barely responded to his text messages or calls, and when you saw him around campus, you would immediately try to avoid him, and it hurt but you were ~scared~

eunwoo’s a smart boy, he knew something was off with you

but after a week of trying to contact you, he didn’t wanna seem annoying or a bother, so he tried not to

even though all he wanted was to see you or talk to you, like it was beyond sex at this point

he missed you, he thought he was going to go insane

he didn’t realize his feelings for you until he saw you talking to a guy in the athletic building

he had basketball practice, and you just finished your cheerleading practice

you were talking to this one guy from your philosophy class, basically joking around and talking shit about your professor

and eunwoo saw you smile at something the guy said and he just felt jealous

his fists clenched, he hated seeing you smile and laugh with the guy like how you used to do with him

and it also didn’t help that you and him haven’t really talked in two or three weeks and he just missed you so much :(

he tried not to think about it during his practice, but it didn’t work, he was off his game for this one, even his teammates and coach noticed it

he went back to his place after practice and called over the boys and basically vented his frustrations

jin: eunwoo. you like y/n

eunwoo: I know...fuck what do I do

bin: tell her, obviously

eunwoo: and risk our?? friendship??

myungjun: you’re a fucking idiot if you don’t see that she likes you back

rocky: yeah...I mean why else do you think noona started distancing herself from you?

eunwoo: maybe I’m just feeling like this because we haven’t met up in a while and I saw her talking to that guy and I don’t know? I’m horny?

sanha: hyung...you sound indenial and jealous.

bin: you like her. we’re surprised you didn’t realize this earlier.

anyway, the day of the competition comes, and the guys and their partners decide to pop out and support you

and seeing them actually made you feel so warm, you wave at them brightly and you meet eyes with eunwoo and you smile at him even though the butterflies are back and at full force

the group is so proud watching you and your team compete, their cheers are debatably the loudest and you literally have to stop yourself from laughing in the middle of your routine

your school places first yuh

and after talking with your team and discussing celebration plans, you go to the group

you were having such an adrenaline rush, you immediately run up to eunwoo in a crushing hug and you kiss him

eunwoo doesn’t even hesitate to kiss you back

astro and them: ohohoho hey

you: I’m so happy you all came! I can’t believe we actually won!

you were going to celebrate with your team bc you knew they were throwing a party, but celebrating with eunwoo and astro/their partners seemed way more appealing to you

you all go out to dinner and drink a little bit casually and it’s all such good vibes

you missed hanging around with them all and it just felt so right

eunwoo rested his hand on your thigh the whole time throughout dinner, he missed you alright, and just seeing you so happy with all his friends? he was hooked

when the group parts ways, it’s just you and eunwoo heading back to his place bc bin is spending the night at his partner’s apartment

and honestly the tension is so thick between you two

you barely make it past the door before you’re both latched onto each other, making out and all that steamy stuff

after you have sex, the two of you are having that post-sex cuddle in his bed and your heart is pounding so loud

you: hey...I’m sorry if it was weird that I kissed you earlier at the venue, I don’t really know what came over me, I was just so glad to see you guys

eunwoo: you don’t have to apologize for that y/n...I missed you

you roll around so that your back is to him bc you do not have the strength to look at him in the eyes right now

eunwoo hugs your waist and pulls you in his chest, he’s spooning you and he has no plans on letting you go any time soon

you: uh...eunwoo, I-we-uh maybe we should stop this...thing from going any further

he literally freezes: ...did I do something wrong?

you: no! it’s...I...fuck I don’t know how to say this...I know we’ve been hooking up for a year but just recently I...think I have feelings for you...and it’s not fair for either of us to continue this if we’re not on the same page.

eunwoo: y/n, I–

you’re rambling now, you’re scared of what he has to say: and honestly you’ve become someone I really don’t wanna lose in my life. You’re an amazing person and friend, and I don’t wanna fuck that up by having feelings for you, especially since you probably don’t feel the same. I just...can’t have casual sex with you anymore...I’m sorry, it would break me.

you’re like trying to get up and you tell him that you’re going to go to the party your team’s hosting but he just tightens his grip

eunwoo: don’t go...please

you: eunwoo, I can’t stay here–

eunwoo: you don’t even know what I feel, y/n...why are you so sure that I don’t feel the same way as you?? because I do...honest to god, y/n, I like you so fucking much. the month that you didn’t talk to me was like hell and I don’t ever wanna experience that again. I missed you so much I thought I was going crazy...please don’t go.

you roll around and face him again

you: y-you like me? you’re not just saying that because you want to keep having sex?

eunwoo: I’m not just saying that because of the sex...I promise

you: so...what does that make us now?

eunwoo: well would you do me the honors and be my girlfriend?

god finally you two are dating

you realize that not much really changes after the two of you make it official

the pda does increase though, you actually hold hands and kiss each other in public now

and you two are more cutesy with each other

yes astro pretends to gag whenever they see you act all coupley

petnames!! you call each other baby, sometimes you call him minnie!! as in dongminnie !! im screaming!!

a poster couple, the basketball player and the cheerleader

literally when you’re both wearing your uniforms and you kiss each other, it’s like one of those teen movies

lots of forehead kisses especially right before bed

eunwoo’s a clingy cuddly boy, especially now that you two are together

lots of study dates?? he is a scholar after all

you’re each other’s biggest supporters !! you always go to all of his recitals and basketball games, he always goes to your competitions

he’s very soft okay, will never stop showing you off or telling you how much you mean to him and how much he loves you

the first I love you came shortly in the relationship, and that’s because you’ve known each other a year prior and the feelings were really just building up since then

you were in the piano room again and he was just playing for fun, but you always loved hearing him ~tickle those ivories~

he was playing a song and singing along and you swear you had heart eyes for him, his voice was so soft and gentle and just wow

you’re sitting next to him and you just hug his waist while he’s playing

eunwoo’s smiling so wide and then he’s singing to you 

he doesn’t even get to finish the song, because you’re grabbing his face and kissing him 

he’s laughing in between kisses and you can’t help but laugh with him

grrr he’s so cute!

and then you two are just looking at each other

eunwoo: hm? 

you: I love you, minnie

he doesn’t miss a beat: I love you too, y/n

you and him have a lot of deep talks together, especially right before bed

it’s the time when he can just let out all the frustrations of the day and just be with you

he actually holds a lot of pressure and worries, but knowing that you’re by his side, comforts him a lot

the two of you have so many pictures together it’s so cute

eunwoo’s a bit possessive alright, not in the toxic way, but will he tighten his grip on your waist if a guy seems to be getting a little too friendly with you? yeah

not gonna lie, you get possessive too, it’s hard especially if your boyfriend is cha eunwoo, he’s the fucking perfect package god dammit

you both tell each other that you don’t have to worry about other people bc y’all are just both so whipped for each other

but it’s still cute when either of you are jealous

he’s actually pretty into couple items, but it has to be like minimalistic-style

like matching plain color hoodies or matching pajama sets

will not wear a “he’s mine, she’s mine” shirt or something

but it’s okay bc neither would you sksksk

will he wink at you if he makes a three pointer during his game? yeah.

literally loves when you wear his clothes or fuck, his jersey?? a turn on

and here we go !! I’ve been talking about sex so much but let’s get into it !!

in the beginning, like before you two started dating, when it was just your fuck buddy friendship, it was sexy

and not saying that it’s not sexy now that you two were in a relationship, but before it was just lust

eunwoo’s a freak alright, you can’t convince me otherwise

he’s a little kinky

definitely into food play, you two use whipped cream during foreplay a little too much...

100% into anal

you know how much he loves ass, has a very nice ass himself

and we already been knew, but yes he’s an ass guy

s p a n k i n g

eunwoo seeing you in your cheerleading skirt? immediate turn on

will literally fuck you while you’re wearing your skirt...just your skirt.

alright alright, you have a hand kink...was it awoken by watching eunwoo play piano all the time? yes

does eunwoo use that to his advantage? yes

the amount of times he’s fingered you??? vaginal and anal??? lord have mercy

very much into overstimulation, will keep fingering you until you squirt

and yes im bringing back my the choking kink

literally if his hands make any contact with your neck area, even when he’s just kissing, you will drench

but ugh you and eunwoo making out and you know how he like cups the back of the neck?? i know y’all have seen it from the true beauty kiss scenes, and then it gets heated and his grip just moves to the front and squeezes and when your mouth opens in a gasp, he shoves his tongue down your throat

that’s so sexy

do you like choking on his cock? probably more than you should

does he make you deep throat until tears are literally streaming down your face? most definitely

he loves marking you?? it’s just a tell tale way to show everyone you’re his

he’s a bit feisty...will he manhandle you during sex?? yeah

eunwoo is a dom. I am 100% convinced that he is a dom, you won’t be domming him honey

daddy and babygirl kink...I said it...

okay he’s a bit of an exhibitionist...would probably be down to have sex anywhere as long as you don’t get caught

piano room sex? locker room sex? library sex? movie theater sex? restaurant bathroom sex? yes you’ve done it all

will he finger you while you guys are having a movie night with the guys? yeah

eunwoo’s a tease, he’s a little shit, will tease you until you’re literally in tears begging for him to just do something

favorite position is doggy, it’s the view of the ass for him

although you two both do like experimenting different positions, especially if it has to do with “training your flexibility”

will pull your hair while he’s fucking you from behind, and will plug your asshole with his thumb–don’t knock it until you try it...it’s...a pretty good feeling

sometimes wakes you up by eating you out

very much a giver ugh king

the type to grip your thighs tighter when you try to push him away from overstimulation just to force another orgasm out of you

believe it or not, he’s a gasper/grunter/groaner

nothing is hotter than hearing eunwoo groan right when he’s about to cum oooof grrrr bark bark

okay but soft gentle sex with eunwoo is so passionate

all you feel is the love and sincerity, especially when he’s just looking in your eyes

the love making happens a lot more obviously when you start dating

he’s just so in love with you alright

gives the best and sweetest after care ugh

cleans you up, gives you massages especially if it was a rough session, cuddles you, draws you a bath, brings you water, everything

always makes sure to tell you he loves you after sex

i would risk it all for eunwoo like please ruin my life

anyway

ugh I just wanna put the idea of protective eunwoo during a party in your head

his hand is always on you. waist, thigh, shoulder, anywhere casually

you don’t fight?? but you do argue

arguing is healthy, and you both would rather let it out and bicker with each other in the moment than let it bottle in and build up into something worse

but when you do have a disagreement, no matter how big or small, you two always make sure to never go to bed angry with each other

communication is very important for the both of you

you’re his better half :’) all the things eunwoo struggles with, you help him with it and vice versa

he figured out you were the one for him during one of your deep late night pillow talks

he was worried about what he’d do in the future after graduating, like he was genuinely having a crisis about it

but you just talked so calmly to him: baby, no matter where you end up after graduation or what you end up doing, you’re going to be fine. You’re such a hard worker and I know that you’ll succeed...no matter what, I’ll be here for you minnie. I believe in you, you’re future is going to be great.

and he just kisses you so sweetly: will you be in my future, baby?

you’re smiling and you just giggle at him: if you want me to be...I’d love to be a part of it.

ugh y’all are so whipped for each other !!

astro always teasing you two, even when you’re all older

you and eunwoo are equally ticklish so basically y’all are fucked when they wanna mess with you

both of your families love you and him instantly

they push marriage immediately after you both graduate college

even astro’s like: we know you two are probably gonna tie the knot first...when’s the wedding?

not gonna lie, you and eunwoo probably get married probably 2-3 years after college, pretty young age

sidenote: eunwoo 100% cries at your wedding, especially when he sees you walking down the isle in your dress

and he has huge baby fever so you bet y’all had kids fairly young too

the best dad !! ugh he loves kids !! ugh so domestic

im just gonna say, y’all have beautiful children

trusts bin and jinjin to babysit your kids the most...he’s scared of the rest of the boys watching over his children

anyway eunwoo literally deserves the world and I just?? love him so much?? happy ending yay hehe

_________________________________________

2-21-21

[imnotwolverine]

Wolfie’s Fic Recs | Anguish and Angst

ANGUISH AND ANGST FICS - Ready for some tear jerkers? Not-so-sweet dreams are made of these fics, so get your tissues and comfort blanket ready. 

🖐 WARNING: NSFW + anxiety inducing content beneath the cut 🖐

Break-ups & Heartbreak

@emyearns probably knows exactly what my first breakup looked like, because.. *ugly cries*. Get your tissues ready for Ghost Of You. [Mike x reader]

August sees the one who got away in No More Tears by @littlefreya [August Walker x OFC] - And I love-love-love that this is written from August’s POV! ❤️

Wearing a man’s sweater gets a whole different meaning after reading this heartbreaking fic by @emyearns. Coffee and Ink [Walter x OFC] 

Ready for some songfic breakup sadness? #11 Captain Sy by @onlyhenrys [Syverson x reader]

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Unrequited Love

Sy’s being a fool and he realises it too late. Soldier On by me. [Syverson x reader]

Henry’s a dick in this one. And you simply had Enough of always being there at the ready as his best friend. By @the-soot-sprite [Henry Cavill x reader]

Would you walk out that door? This angsty prompt’s got you all kinds of frustrated. By @onlyhenrys

I wasn’t sure whether to place this here. But a child’s love is love too. Geralt secretly watches a family have a picnic and the kid is apparently not afraid of monsters. Highway to Hell by @wendimydarling [Geralt of Rivia] 

Let’s take a little bit of a breather with a mildly angsty, but mostly very fluffy fic of friends-taking-way-too-fucking-long-to-become-lovers. Stolen Kisses by @the-soot-sprite [Henry Cavill x OFC]

This fic is probably the pinnacle of unrequited love; it’s got slow-burn, angst-turns-fluff-in-the-end and Henry being an utter fool in the love department. (Ps. I haven’t completely caught up with this fic, so NO SPOILERS IN THE COMMENTS DAMNIT!)  Chances by @foodieforthoughts [Henry Cavill x OFC]

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Nightmares & PTSD

If you want angsty dreams followed by hot, craving smut; Stay and read this fic. By me [Henry Cavill x reader]

Waking up in a hospital bed with a strange man beside you. It’s a setup I wish was a full length fic, but alas..Short but mighty. Emotion challenge - Anxious by @onlyhenrys [Walter Marshall + reader]

Nightmares wake August, but you're there to guard him when the storms outside and in get too dark. Prompt with August by @onlyhenrys [August Walker x reader]

More nightmares are kept at bay in this gorgeous little fic by @littlefreya. Angel Can You Hold Me [August Walker x OFC]

More nightmare-having bulky dudes? Marshall’s life isn’t all roses and sunshine, even when he’s caught a pretty thing in his bed. Can’t You Stay A Little Longer by @onlyhenrys [Walter Marshall x reader]

The more cutting the hurt of your past, the harder it is to open up to new people. Henry has walked on eggshells, but now finally wants to know what’s up. And if words can’t form on lips, perhaps they can..on fingertips. Please Don’t Leave Me by @wendimydarling [Henry Cavill x reader]

--

It’s a Hard Knock Life

I can’t be the only LotR-nerd who got elf!Geralt vibes when watching the Witcher. So let me give you some impossible love, anguish and Middle Earth hardships in When In Dreams [elf!Geralt x human!OFC] 

You’re not sure whether Charles will return, so the last few hours with him are Sad indeed. By @onlyhenrys [Charles Brandon x reader]

We’re all having a hard knock life with the pandemic going on. So let Marshall give you some sweet care in Pandemic Anxieties by @promptandpros [Walter Marshall x reader]

Between the lines of smoking hot Superman sex, you’ll feel bad for him. Because as morning comes, life goes on. Alone. On the road. Where he hopes he’ll find yet another hot shower and a bed for the night. Convenience by @wendimydarling [Clark Kent x OFC]

Had a bad day? Henry will give you clear instructions on how to relax in: Your Voice by @peachyvulpixie [Henry Cavill x reader]

You play with the locket to your heart when Walter returns, gunpowder in the air. Despite your anniversary and all things good, you just know something’s up with him. Unnamed Marshall piece by @writernerd23 [Walter Marshall x reader]

Falling Again follows struggling AU!Henry dad as the bills keep piling and life just won’t feel the way it did when his wife was still around. By @deathonyourtongue​ [AU!Henry Cavill] 

--

Depression & Body Consciousness 

Depression is a bitch, but Henry isn’t. When Words Fail, he’s there. By @princess-of-riviaa [Henry Cavill x reader]

Failing to conceive is painful, terrible, heartbreaking. And unfortunately not even the big bear can’t make it better. Feeling Challenge: Sad by @meowpurrbooks [Henry Cavill x reader]

More conceiving sadness is there in Negative, by @oddduckthatgirl -- some Christmasses just truly suck. [Henry Cavill x reader]

The loss of your husband still crushes you and his best friend, Syverson, even a year after his passing. Get your tissues ready, because this is one big ol’ tearjerker; A Soldier’s Heart by @onlyhenrys [late husband x reader + Captain Syverson]

You feel like the new life within you is the last thing Napoleon wants in his life. A Mistake by @coloraturadiva [Napoleon Solo x reader]

Good love is accepting that change is part of life. And loving one-self is often the hardest, especially when those changes seem to pry you apart from Henry. Comfort by @promptandpros [Henry Cavill x reader]

An insecure woman meets a man in the club. But this man’s not like the others, not one bit. Unexpected by @nuggsmum​ [August Walker x OFC]

Sometimes even burrito blankets can’t give you comfort. Nor your favourite show, nor anything really. Depression truly is a bitch, especially when Henry’s away. Stuck In Your Head by @inlovewithhisblueeyes [Henry Cavill x reader]

Faye’s text messages in this fic still crack me up every time, though they sure make for a stark contrast to the burned latkes and big tear fest -- it’s a good thing Marshall is a big fluffy care bear. The Great Jewish Cook-off by @inlovewithhisblueeyes [Walter Marshall x reader]

--

Corruption & Death

Walking on woodland trails you find something naive to Corrupt. By @emyearns. [angel!Mike x reader]

August has died many deaths, but still he craves One More Time - just so he can be with her. By @thetaoofzoe [August Walker x OFC] 

Our great master of angst and death suffers, and makes the world suffer, once more. There Cannot Be Peace by @killjoy-assbutt-1112 [August Walker x reader]

Okay, so this one’s on AO3, but I’ve loved it ever since first reading it. Geralt hears of Jaskier’s death and realizes a thing or two as he tries to come to terms with it all. It’s Like I’ve Gone Off To The Coast by adhdbuck [Geralt + Jaskier] 

Napoleon finds himself in a hospital, not sure what to feel as he waits for doctors to give him news. The News. Any news. Grief by @promptandpros [Napoleon Solo x OFC]

The king of corruption is defiling an angel without wings in Black Tears, by @littlefreya [August Walker x OFC]

When death comes knocking, Geralt realises his annoying bard isn’t one he wants to lose. Did You Mean It by @thecomfortofoldstorries​ [Geralt x Jaskier]

Sometimes good things come to an end, but Henry just doesn’t want it. Not even when the doctors are losing hope. The Call: Irresistible You by @angrythingstarlight [Henry Cavill x OFC]

August Walker is the perfect kind of nightmare material. Especially in this terribly hot angsty smut piece by @hope-to-hell: Dream State [August Walker x reader]

This gorgeous impressionistic piece includes raspberry mousse, blood, scarred hands and August Walker. Into The Storm by @hope-to-hell [August Walker x OFC]

--

Need a little lift-me-up after all these tear jerkers? Short Sweets is a fic rec list with a bunch of completely innocent and utterly lovely fics which will keep the bad dreams at bay ❤️

--

If you have any good recommendations that fit in this list, please add in the comments or reblog! 

( Fan art by me 😊)

[baconcheeseburger]

You want her?

Summary: Dean and you are out drinking. Dean notices that you are eying the bartendress and decides to act on it. He suggests to take her back to the motel with you, for a night you both will never forget.

Pairing: Dean x Reader x Robin (OFC)

Warnings: NSFW, no plot in sight, just smut, threesome (f/f/m), oral (fem receiving), fingering, dirty talk, spanking, tied up, edging, kinda dom!Dean, voyeurism, masturbation, hair pulling, rough-ish sex, unprotected sex

Word count: 4,4k pure filth

Prompt: “You like the way I flick my tongue?”

A/N: Written for @supernatural-jackles​‘ bi-weekly writing challenge. More or less my first time writing smut, at least a lengthy one. Sorry for posting so late and last minute, unfortunately life got in the way... But here it is! - Enjoy! Banner and divider were made by me.

“You want her, Y/N?”

His question caught you off  guard and you froze. Your jaw dropped and you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything.

Dean stood close behind you, his face alongside yours, following your gaze to the other side of the bar. You hadn’t been able to tear your gaze away from the bartendress all night. Your eyes had kept trailing back to her, watching her walking around behind the bar and pouring out drinks. Watching her tits bounce with every step and her hips sway with every move. From time to time you had catched yourself wondering and imagining how her lips would feel like on yours, how soft her hands would feel on your body.

“She was checking you out all night as well.” His voice had dropped a few octaves. His hot breath fanned over your ear and cheek and his lips lightly graced the shell of it as he spoke. Paired with the way he pressed his body into yours from behind and his big, strong hands gripping your hips tightly, fingertips digging hard into the flesh, he had you whimpering. You didn’t even register a sound left your lips until you heard him groan deeply.

“You know”, he began and lightly nibbled on your earlobe, “I saw how you were looking at her since we got here, saw how you practically eye fucked her in front of me. Fuck, baby, I can’t help but to imagine you making out with her. I bet you would look so fucking good together.” He slightly lowered his body and rolled his hips up against yours and your breath hitched when you felt his growing bulge press against the crack of your ass. “I’d love to see her on top of you, ‘d love to see her eat your pretty little pussy out. I know you’ve never done anything with a woman before, but... Hell, I see the way you look at her and I say, let’s take her home and have some fun. So, I ask you again... You want her, Y/N?” He licked over the shell of your ear and pulled it in between his teeth, lightly biting down.

Your eyes fluttered shut and heat was pooling between your thighs. Damn, alone the thought of the three of you together made you moan. You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth and leaned back against him. Breathing heavily you pressed your thighs together. 

“Mmh, who says I have zero experience with women, huh?” you teased. You turned your head to look into his shocked, lust blown eyes.

“Fuck, sweetheart”, he growled and crashed his lips against yours. He pulled back just as fast and let go of your body. You hadn’t realized how weak your knees had become and almost lost your balance when he stepped back. Dean pushed through the people and walked over to the bartendress with long strides.

You had no idea what he was saying to her, but at first she was about to shake her head then she curiously looked over to you when he pointed in your direction. You watched her bite her lip before she turned back to him and said something to him. Dean's smirk grew wider at her answer. He nodded and came back, the onesided pantie dropping grin never leaving his lips. He winked at you and grabbed your wrist. “Let’s go.”

You stepped outside and Dean pulled you into the alley next to the bar, pressed you against the brick wall and pushed his leg between your thighs, before he dipped his head and kissed you passionately. Your hands immediately found their way to his neck, gripping at the short hair at the back of his head. When he pulled back, he was panting.

"She’s getting off in thirty. Told her where we’re staying, she will come to the motel when she’s done here”, he growled into your ear and pushed his knee up, giving you the much needed friction. “Gonna work you up until then baby, want you drippin’ when she joins us.” He captured your lips once more and pushed his knee up again. You couldn’t hold back anymore. You started to desperately grind against his thigh and moaned into his mouth. You had never been so turned on in your life.

He chuckled and pushed his thigh even higher, which had you standing on your toes, almost lifting you off of the ground and ground his hips against yours. You could feel his rock hard cock against your stomach and you didn’t want anything more than to drop to your knees and let him fuck your mouth.

Dean sucked your bottom lip between his teeth and pulled before he stepped back, growling. “Baby, we gotta go. If we don’t stop, I’m gonna fuck you right here and now, where anyone can see us.”

You looked at him through hooded eyes, a mischievous smile growing on your lips. You let your hands wander over his body, traveling further down to his waistband. “Well, what speaks against it, huh?”

He groaned deeply. “Because,” you could see the strength he had to gather to take another step back, “I have othet things planned for you tonight and fucking you in the middle of the street isn’t on the list.”

Back in your motel room Dean shut the door behind you. He backed you up against the wall, grabbed the back of your thighs and picked you up. Within seconds your upper body was naked and he attacked your neck with his mouth. His hands grabbed your breasts and he started to play with your nipples, rolling them between his fingers.

“Tell me, Y/N”, he let one of his hands slide down your body and fidgeted with the button of your jeans, “how far have you gone with a woman?” He licked over your pulse point and scraped his teeth over the sensitive skin, nibbling on the spot that made your knees weak.

“Made out with two girls in senior year. Almost would have fucked the second one, b-but I- wasn’t sure if sh-she would want to g-go there, so we didn’t go further than that. Oh fuck, Dean!”

You cried out when his hand found its way into your pants and his fingers finally touched you where you wanted them the most.

He bit into your shoulder to muffle the deep and long moan that escaped his lips. “Fuuuck, baby, you’re drenched.”

Dean pressed his palm flat against your clothed core, rubbing in the slightest motions. “Let’s see how often I can bring you to the edge until she gets here, huh?”

He put more pressure on his middle finger, parting your lips when he moved his hand upwards and stopped at your clit. With the tip of his finger he tapped against it, sending shivers down your spine and making your walls clench around nothing. He added another finger, pressed down and started to circle them around the bundle of nerves through the lace of your panties. When a loud whiny moan left your lips, you just let it happen. You didn’t care if anyone heard you. 

While his lips worked their way down to your breasts to give the unoccupied nipple some attention, his fingers were moving slowly, stretching out every bit of pleasure that jolts through you.

It didn't take long until your body started to shake and your breath hitched, little whimpers leaving your lips. Dean knew your body even better than you did yourself. He knew exactly which buttons to push, knew how to push you further and further, knew every little movement and sound you made when you were about to let go. He knew how to keep you on the edge until you couldn't take anymore without pushing you over.

You gasped when his fingers stopped moving right when you got close, right before the tight knot in your stomach was about to snap. You felt his lips on your neck, felt him smile, before he pressed down on your clit and lightly tapped against it again. Your eyes rolled back and you let your head fall against the wall, moaning. Oh sweet, sweet torture.

He moved his hand away from your center and grabbed your jaw, forcing you to look at him. Dean grinned mischievously. 

"One." The tip of his tongue peaked through his teeth. He licked his lips and kissed your hard and fast.

You were so distracted by his lips and tongue, that you didn't register his hand slipped back down. This time he pushed it into your panties and when his fingers brushed over your folds you shamelessly moaned into his mouth. 

"Oh fuck, Dean, yes."

His fingertips circled your clit for a few times, then he pushed his hand further down and slipped a finger into your pussy. Your walls immediately clenched around the digit, trying to suck it deeper. He slowly pumped it in and out, teasingly brushing over your walls. When he added a second finger he started to move faster. In a skilled motion he crooked his fingers and pressed down onto the spot that made your knees weak. 

Dean kissed his way over your jaw, back to your neck. He licked, sucked and nibbled on the sensitive skin. To drive you even more insane, he started to thrust his hips into yours, rubbing the palm of his hand against your core.

Your walls clenched and you felt the coil in your stomach tighten again until Dean pulled away.

"Two." He whispered, his hot breath fanned over the shell of your ear.

He loosened your legs from his waist and as soon as your feet hit the ground he ripped your jeans and panties down, helped you step out of them and threw them across the room. His mouth captured yours again, distantly you heard his belt unbuckle. Dean grabbed your wrists and held them together in one hand in front of you. With a questioning look he searched for your gaze as he moved the belt around your wrists. You sucked your bottom lip between your teeth and nodded.

With every brush of his calloused fingertips over your skin as he wrapped the leather around your wrists, he sent a shiver down your spine. When he was satisfied with the tightness of the belt, his gaze fell above your head. He smirked and brought your hands up over your head and hooked the belt into the hook of the coat rack on the wall. You pulled a bit, testing out if the rack would hold. It seemed pretty stable.

As soon as you both were sure the thing wouldn't break, Dean covered your body with his and pressed himself against you. His hands were sprawled out on you back, one on your ass, pulling your hips into his and the other one pressed down between your shoulder blades, pushing you into him and holding you in place. He leaned down and kissed you hard.

By the time a sharp knock on the door ripped you from your own little world, your legs were shaking and were barely able to hold your body up. You had lost count on how often Dean had pushed you to the edge.

Dean clicked his tongue before he took a step back and turned around to open up. 

The leather on your wrists felt heavier than before, tighter. You hoped the rack would withstand your weight and you let your legs give in to let the coat rack support most of your weight, so you could concentrate on catching your breath. Your lungs hurt with every breath you took.

Your eyes followed Dean as he grabbed his flannel from the floor and put it on while he walked to the door. He opened it a bit in only his jeans and the open flannel and looked outside for a second before he opened it fully with a smile on his face. 

You heard the clicking of heels on the wooden floor and shortly after the bartendress entered the room. A small part of you was surprised that she was really here, you thought she might not even come.

Now that she was here you were slightly embarrassed hanging around naked on a coat rack. But she didn’t seem to mind it at all. No, instead of questioning your position, she started to peel off her jacket and eyed you hungrily.

“Hey. I see you started without me, huh?” she joked and threw the piece of clothing on the chair.

Before she walked over to you she pulled her dress over her head, revealing a matching black lace lingerie set, her hips swaying even more than before. You looked her up and down, eyes traveling over her curves. Right in front of you she stopped and let her eyes wander over your naked body, biting her lip.

The tip of your tongue darted out and wetted your lips, before you smiled at her. "Hi." Her lips curved upwards. “Hey. Y/N, right? I am Robin, it's really nice to meet you.”

“Likewise, Robin. I’d shake your hand, but…” You chuckled and with a wide one sided smile you looked up at your wrists. Her eyes followed your gaze.

When your eyes met again, she smirked at you. “Oh well, you know… There are a few other ways to say hello….” Her beautiful brown hazel eyes darted to your lips, then she looked up into your eyes again before her gaze settled on your lips. Now that she was so close you could see the golden specks in her iris that made them sparkle even more.

She leaned forward and pressed her lips to yours, you couldn’t hold back the moan that escaped your throat. Finally you felt her lips and it was nothing like you had imagined; in a good way. They were so incredibly soft and full and felt fucking wonderful. You opened your mouth to let her tongue in. Your tongues danced against each other, the kiss getting more heated with every passing second.

After some time Robin pulled back, her lips still brushing over yours as she whispered: “Can I touch you?”

“Please", you begged. She lifted her hands and graced the skin of your forearm with the tips of her fingers from your elbows up to your bound wrists. Her palms pressed against your soft skin and she lowered her hands again, letting them glide over your skin and softly scratching her fingernails along the way. Your whole body began to shiver. It felt so unbelievably good to be touched by her, you almost couldn't handle the anticipation for more. You wanted to feel her hands everywhere, wanted her to touch every inch of your skin.

Robin scratched her nails down your arms and over your ribs, over your sides down to the mid of your thighs where she changed the angle of her hands, pressed her palms against your skin and moved them back up to your hips. With a firm grip on your butt cheeks she pulled your hips into hers. Not a second later her mouth was on yours again in a heated kiss. She bit on your bottom lip and pulled before she kissed her way over your cheek to your jaw. She placed sloppy kisses all over your neck and collar bone, slightly nibbling on it. 

Her hands roamed all over your body, no inch of skin left untouched. When she reached your breasts she grabbed and massaged them. Her index finger teasingly circled around your nipple for a few times at first and scratched her nail lightly over it, before she pinched them between her fingers, twirling them around. You sighed and whimpered at the sensation, the air suddenly knocked out of your lunges. Your eyes shut and your head fell back. With your eyes closed her touch felt a lot more intense.

“Need to taste you”, Robin mumbled against your collarbone. She slowly lowered herself and kissed and nibbled her way down your body.

When you heard Dean’s deep voice, it shifted your attention away from Robin, back to him. “Baby, I want you to look at me while she eats you out.”

Your eyes locked with his and another incredibly strong wave of pleasure washed over your body, just from looking at him. Dean had taken off the rest of his clothing and stood by the bed. You could see all the emotions that whirled around in his forest green eyes. The way he moved his hand up and down his cock and the way the muscles in his arm flexed with every stroke of his hand turned you incredibly on. 

Robin reached your mound and planted a kiss right aove your slit. She pulled one of your legs over her shoulder and immediately started to devour you. She licked over your slit, flicked her tongue against your clit and repeated the motion. With every lick she got faster, hungrily licking up your juices.

When a particular long and loud moan left your lips she looked up into your eyes and hummed. “You like the way I flick my tongue, baby?” She licked a long stripe over your slit again, circling your clit with the tip of her tongue a few times before she sucked it hard between her lips, her teeth lightly scraping over the sensitive skin. When she pressed her tongue flat against it while she still had it pinned between her full lips, you let your head fall back against the wall and you moaned loudly.

“Answer her”, Dean ordered in a low voice.

“Mmmh”, was all you were able to respond.

“Use your words, sweetheart.”

"F-Feels so good. Love your t-ounge. So so good." 

You looked back at him, saw that he sat down on the end of the bed while he kept his eyes on the both of you, watching you closely and pumping his fist up and down his thick shaft. 

“Fuck, look at her, sweetheart. Doing such a good job fucking you with her mouth. Freakin’ love the sounds she coaxes out of you.”

Robin’s tongue moved around your clit, occasionally changing rhythm and pattern, hitting all the right spots.

“Oh fuck, yes. Don- don’t stop. Fuck, so good.”

She chuckled at that, sending vibrations straight to your core, and sucked hard on your clit.

“You want her to fuck you with her fingers?” Dean asked.

You fastly nodded your head. “Uh-huh”

“Words, baby girl”, Dean reminded you sternly, his voice was deep and laced with lust. 

“Y- yes. Aah fuck. Please, please. Need- need your fingers inside me”, you begged and teared your eyes away from Dean to look down at her.

“You heard her, Robin. Do it. Push your fingers into her cunt and fuck her. Hard.”

Not needing to be told twice her hand left your butt and moved between your legs. She teasingly brushed over your lips before she pushed two fingers into your throbbing pussy and immediately found your sensitive spot. After a few hard thrusts she added another finger, filling you up.

It didn’t take her long to have you a whimpering mess above her, ready to let go. The coil in your stomach grew tighter and tighter and was about to snap.

And Dean sensed it too. “Stop touching her.”

No, no, no! When she stopped moving her fingers and pulled away, you whined loudly. You didn’t care how pathetic it must have sounded, this was pure fucking torture. You were so fucking close - again - and he just wouldn’t let you come.

“Dean… Please. Please, I want to- need to-” you begged until he interrupted you harshly.

“No.”

“Dean-”

“Not yet, sweetheart.”

“But-”

“Not. Yet." Dean almost growled. "If you’re gonna come, then you’re gonna come on my cock. You understand?”

He left no room for discussion and to be honest his words alone could have sent you over right now. 

Robin stood up, but not without kissing her way up your body. When she stood straight again she raised her hand that was glistening with your juices and slowly pushed them between your lips. You moaned when you tasted yourself on her fingers

Dean ordered her to lay down on the bed, so she walked backwards while she pulled off her underwear, her eyes never leaving you and pulled herself up to the headboard. She leaned back on her elbows and pushed her heels into the mattress, her knees falling wide open to reveal her wet, glistening pussy lips. You gasped at the sight and sucked your bottom lip between your teeth, your mouth began to water.

Dean stepped closer to you and took Robin’s place. He covered half your body by pressing his body into your side. His hand traveled over your stomach up to your throat. He laid his fingers around your neck and chuckled darkly while flexing them. His lips were so close they brushed over the edge of your ear.

“You wanna taste her?” The tip of his tongue graced over the shell.  Dean stood so close, you could feel the bass vibrating in his chest as he spoke.

"Yes, please. Wanna taste her so bad." You turned your head and looked at him, begging him with your eyes to free your hands so you could join her on the bed and dive in between her legs.

"Then go on, do it." He raised his free hand and lifted your hands from the rack to open the belt. As soon as the leather was gone he moved his hand to the back of your neck and directed you to the bed.

You walked over on shaking legs, incredibly glad the bed wasn’t too far away. You crawled over to her and started to touch her thighs, rubbing your hands up and down her soft skin. You pressed your lips against her inner thigh and kissed your way up until you reached her puss, where you pressed a kiss to her clit. Your tongue darted out and you licked over her lips, finally tasting her. And damn, she tasted great. You began to eat her out, mirroring what she had done to you and changing it up a bit. It didn’t take you long to find out what drove her crazy, what made her beg for more.

You were so concentrated on Robin that you didn’t feel the bed dip behind you. You only realized that Dean was behind you when his big hands grabbed your butt and he slit the head of his cock through your pussy lips.

Without a warning he slammed his hips into yours, filling you up with his cock in one thrust. The pleasure that rolled through your body overwhelmed you when he bottomed out, his hips slapping against your ass and pushing you forward, deeper between Robin’s legs. Your legs began to shake again and you rested your forehead against her stomach to recover your breath. Robin’s hands moved to head, stroking over your hair.

You waited for him to fucking move, but Dean didn’t move. He stayed still, waiting. The hand came out of nowhere, slapping down on your ass hard. You yelped at the impact, then moaned, welcoming the stinging pain.

"Did I tell you to stop? Keep going. Make her cum and maybe I will let you cum too." And with that his hand came back down on your ass cheek, reddening the skin.

You eagerly began to thrust your tongue into her entrance and flick it against her clit. You moved your hand from her hip and slowly pushed two fingers into her entrance, starting to fuck her with your fingers. As soon as you started, Dean slowly pulled his cock out and hardly thrusted back into you. The sound of his hips slapping against your ass filled the room as he fucked you hard and fast, his fingers digging hardly into your hips to keep you in place.

You moaned against Robin, the vibrations helped pushing her further to her release. You could tell she was close, you felt her walls clench around your fingers. With a twist of your wrist you changed the angle you fucked into her and crooked your fingers. Her pussy gripped your fingers tight, her thighs began to shake and caged your head between them when she came, screaming your name.

Dean leaned forward and buried his hand in your hair and pulled you up by it. Your back hit his chest and his other hand came around your body, grabbing your throat. He picked up his pace, fucking you even harder.

Robin moved and kneeled down in front of you. She pressed her mouth to yours and started to kiss you, her hands wandering over your body. She grabbed your breast and played with your nipple. With the other she rubbed against your clit, adding even more to your pleasure.

Dean nibbled on your neck. “Now”, he grunted. “Come. Come for me, baby.”

A few thrusts later your walls clenched around his cock, you came so hard you saw stars and your ears began to ring. Your screams were muffled by Robin’s mouth on yours.

Dean followed you soon after, the pulsing of his cock sending you straight into another orgasm. He now slowly fucked into you, riding your orgasms out.

You hadn’t moved much after, you were totally spent. You sank down to the mattress, your body aching in sweet pain. Dean got up to get something to clean you up, while Robin lay with you, kissing you and moving her fingertips over your back, side and arms.

When Dean came back from the bathroom he put the blanket over your bodies and lay next to you. He planted a kiss on your shoulder and chuckled when he saw your tired eyes. You turned to him and sighed happily.

You felt Robin inch closer to you. She pressed herself against your back, her nose brushed over the nape of your neck. A small sigh left her lips and her body relaxed with every breath she took. She slowly drifted to sleep.

Dean cradled your cheek in his hand, brushed his fingertips over your cheekbone and jaw. He bit on his lip and grinned at you.

“Had fun, sweetheart?”

You chuckled, pecked his lips and rested your forehead against his. “Oh yes, I had fun. A lot. Thank you, Dean. That was…”

“Yeah. It was.” He grinned. “Get some sleep, sweetheart. I love you.”

“I love you too, Dean.”

[brynfelan]

ALDJSHSKS OH THANK GOD I WASN'T WORRIED BUT I WAS A LIL WORRIED...alright imma start off with a Kuzuhina(ish) idea, because rarepair hell sucks let's suffer together. Hajine gets kidnapped by a psycho group NOT because of his relationship to Fuyuhiko, but because they "wanna see what makes the Ultimate Ultimate tick." Which is infinitely worse because the human experimentation is back on for our tsundere ahoge boy. He got lobotomized and now he's back in that particular hell. Izuru's also suffering because he's grown to care for Hajime in his own way, because they're two separate minds in one body, and he can't protect Hajime from this. Fuyuhiko is basically going postal because "MY BOYFRIEND WAS KIDNAPPED BY LUNATICS, WE DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY WANT, AND NO ONE'S DOING ANYTHING WHAT THE FUCK." The rest of the Remnants are also pissed and worried, but Fuyuhiko moreso. Your thoughts???

like one day he’s just gone ?? no note? just poof?

holy hell i have this image of fuyuhiko absolutely TEARING UP the 100km area around them just looking. ofc the other remnants are pissed too but nobody has ever seen fuyuhiko just go off like this. eventually he realises he can’t find him by just searching aimlessly so soda builds some walkie talkies STAT (or they get to ask future foundation for help? i haven’t decided which is better), but point is all of the remnants absolutely descend on the surrounding area, with their own sections to search. the communicators have lil GPS things on em so they always know where the other is.

it’s gotta be fuyuhiko that finds him though, right? because like... angst. anyway, fuyuhiko finds this old underground bunker, and can’t open it by himself so he calls everybody over. akane, gundham and nekomaru manage to get it open, n peko has to literally hold fuyuhiko back to stop him just bolting down there as fast as he can.

they get to have a fucking cool fight scene when they’re down there, because I can’t resist letting Peko absolutely go off with her sword, and we saw what kinda mess akane and nekomaru can make fighting in the despair arc. those three people could definitely take down like 30 people between them, trust me on this one.

the worst part is when they get to the room that has hajime in it. the door got locked when whoever got him realised that they’d had a security breach, and it’s a proper lead door that won’t open for anybody and everybody has to repeatedly throw themselves against it in order to get it to open. everybody’s panicking, but there is nobody worse than fuyuhiko. like, to the point where some of them are worried that he’s gonna get his ass despaired again. but nobody says anything because main priority is hajime. 

at some point, nagito started looking through the pockets of the people that got absolutely knocked tf out, and Lucky Him! he finds a key! it’s maybe the first time ever that fuyuhiko ever thanks him for something (and my god does he thank him like, he’s crying and while he’s a lil bit aggressive he’s so grateful) and they get in and find hajime hooked up to a ton of different machines.

you ever heard of project MKUltra? when the US government tested psychedelic drugs (particularly LSD) as a torture device/truth serum? yeah well, this is it! hajime is tripping absolute balls and not in a fun way, occasionally getting some electric shocks! why? well, it’s in the “doctor’s” file on the desk! because wouldn’t hajime also be the ultimate weapon if he’s the ultimate everything else? imagine having him as something that can be controlled, told what to do. you could end the world, overthrow a government, you name it!

mikan has to carefully remove the electrodes from him because he’s fighting her hard, but there isn’t a way to get him to stop tripping and freaking out until it passes, except to just straight up sedate him. they have no idea how long this has been happening to him or what he’ll be like when it’s over. mikan has to scrounge through everything that this place has to find something, and even though it takes a while she does eventually find a high enough dose sedative that will help without just making him OD and die. unfortunately, it has to go in through a needle.

historically, hajime isn’t good with needles. he’s even worse when he’s off his fucking face and having the very definition of a Bad Trip. he barely knows where he is, and there’s a part of him that does recognise the people around him but his brain isn’t working properly and he just can’t stop freaking out. he’s already restrained though, so it isn’t too hard to just quickly sedate him. fuyuhiko’s basically glued to him now, telling him he’s sorry and that he’ll be okay soon, that it’s gonna be alright.

luckily, without getting it directly and constantly, the effects of LSD only take around 12 hours to wear off. by the time they’re back at wherever they’re living, most of the hallucinations have worn off, but he’s quiet and hurt, and the electric buzzing kinda fried his brain a little bit - he’s still there, but izuru is basically the one in charge of the body right now since he’s letting hajime rest for now.

fuyuhiko still thinks izuru is a little weird, but like... he’s part of hajime, so he’ll put up with whatever bullshit izuru can throw at him. izuru isn’t as affectionate, but will hold his hand every so often and give him small smiles when he needs them, and it just feels good to have him back and safe. when hajime comes back again though, it takes a while before he can be left alone again. not that fuyuhiko is leaving his side basically ever now because he’s sure as hell not letting that happen ever again. and it takes him a while to heal, he never truly forgets or gets over what happened to him, but everybody’s there for him. he knows he has a family now, and everybody understands if he needs to go away for a little while and let izuru take care of the body when he can’t.

okay this got super long and i am very sorry but you threw this concept at me and i ran because i love angst so much, but the comforting after the angst is also so good.

[evakuality]

Your last prompt was so beautiful. Could you maybe write more about it? David's insecurities about being too needy? How Matteo would feel about it? Maybe he tries to tone it down and Matteo ofc realises it and is hurt and thinks David is annoyed at him or so? And then they finally talk?

I’m not even sure if this is what you want, anon.  But here it is: Clingy, part two

It’s subtle.  Barely there.  It’s just barely whispering in the dark recesses of his brain.  But it is there, and once he notices it the first time, Matteo can’t stop noticing.

What happens when they’re together, touching or holding each other, is David pulling back first.  He stiffens, tensing shoulders and sucked-in breaths coming earliest.  Matteo can tell it’s there, that slight pulling back and away, but David always hides it, forces his body to relax into their moments together, forces his arms to stay around Matteo.  Matteo knows he’s trying to avoid Matteo noticing, and part of him doesn’t even want to know what the message behind it is.

It’s subtle, after all.  If he weren’t so attuned to David, Matteo would probably never have realised.  But the thing is that it’s not so subtle that it’s all in his head.  So Matteo wants to ignore it, to let himself follow the way his body wants to believe in the overt messages from David’s body, that they fit, that they should always be together in these ways, holding and hugging.  Unfortunately, there’s that small niggling part of him that wants to know.  The part of him that ran to David’s house all those months ago, willing to confront him, wants to push back now.  But he’s learned his lesson, painfully, after that moment.  Knows that pushing David will only make things worse.

The big problem, though, is that Matteo has to live with the end result and the impact it has on his heart.  Every time David doesn’t offer affection, every time he breaks out of a moment first, every time he tenses - even briefly - when they hug.  All those times pile up.  They outweigh the times when it’s easy, when they fall together into the touch Matteo relies on so much. They suck the comfort and peace of those small moments.

Because that’s the other problem.  That Matteo wants this and needs this.  That the pain of having the one he loves reject him in so many small ways hits him so hard and so often that it’s hard to keep it in.  Hard not to let it show.  He should probably have expected this though.  It’s not exactly normal to crave touch the way Matteo does.  It should have been obvious that this would happen, that Matteo would become too much in this way.  That David would have to force the affection Matteo always so desperately craves.

It’s painful and it hurts but he can’t stop.  He can’t stop offering his arms when he needs a moment.  He can’t stop the ugly thoughts that well up at the same time either.

Not good enough.  Too much.  Clingy.  Needy.

They swirl in his head late one night until he can’t stand it anymore.  The weight of it all presses on his chest.  He’s lying on David, tugging him in as close as he can.  But he can feel it thrumming, feel the rumblings of David's tension picking up under his fingers as they skim over David’s skin, and he can tell that he’s going to have to let the moment go.

Fuck it, he decides.  The ignoring is getting too much, it’s cracking him open in too many ways.  So he twists, turns to look at David.  His eyes are closed, mouth tilted together into a small smile.  He looks relaxed and easy, he looks like Matteo feels.  Those eyes flicker open to look into Matteo’s, though, and there’s a shroud of something shuttering the gaze.

Taking a breath, and dragging together all his courage, Matteo sighs.  He runs his fingers up to David’s lips, presses the tips there, watching the way they part under his touch.

“What’s the matter?” he asks, quietly.  

His voice is rough, and he can hear the traces of anxiety that crack through it.  David can obviously hear it too because his body which had actually relaxed a little under Matteo’s fingers, is suddenly thrumming with tension and the eyes he fixes on Matteo’s are wide and startled.

“What do you mean?” David asks.  His voice isn’t any more steady than Matteo's and that’s enough to send a wave of anxiety coursing through him.  Maybe this is it, then.  Maybe this is when David lets him know just how annoying his desperate need for affection is.  He swallows, unsure if he can really say what he needs to.  But it’s become so much that Matteo needs to know, one way or another.

“Am I… too much?”  He watches closely, needing to see what’s going on behind David’s eyes, needs to see it happen.  David blinks, a frown creasing between his brows and his lips pursing in confusion.  He doesn’t look like he gets it.

“Are you too much?  I don’t quite—”

Matteo doesn’t understand what’s going on, can’t quite parse this response, but what he can understand is the way David’s arms clutch at him, the way he drags him closer even though that should be impossible.  

“It’s just, I don’t know.  You don’t seem to want to hug so much.”  Matteo can’t bring himself to say all the stuff about pulling away, about rejection, about how painful it’s all been.  So he contents himself with a question.  Because that’s easier than explaining all the pain he’s been carrying.  “So I… I just wanted to know if it’s too much.  If I should stop.  Do you want me to stop?”

Matteo’s heart is thundering.  He’s almost certain David isn’t going to break up with him.  But he needs to know if he should dial it down, if he should try not to be quite so clingy.  Instead of the serious consideration Matteo assumes will come, David’s chest shivers with a laugh, silent for a moment but then ringing out in one loud peal.  Matteo frowns.  He’s not entirely sure why this is funny.  He squints up at David, bewildered to see something that looks like relief on his face, and there must be something of that confusion showing in his own face because David’s clears into the most beautiful radiance and he traces one finger down Matteo’s jaw to his chin and tilts it to kiss him.

“I thought it was all me,” David says, with another shaky laugh.  “I’ve been thinking I’m too much, that my need for cuddling is too much and so I’ve been trying to hold back a bit.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Matteo mutters, a grumpy relief flooding through him.  He clasps David tighter, tucks his head in under his chin.  To his delight, David’s body loses all traces of the stiffness that’s characterised so much of the last few weeks.

He feels the soft brush of lips on his hair, a hand carefully settling the hairs into place with tender fingers.  He smiles, cuddles closer.

“You’re the one who just asked if you should stop hugging,” David points out.  “So who’s the actually ridiculous one?”

“You.  At least I asked.”

David squeezes his shoulder, trails his fingers down and along his arm.  “You did, and I should thank you for that.  I’ve been so worried about it.”

Matteo shakes his head, amused now more than irritated.  Of course it’s like this.  Of course David struggled with the same things Matteo did.  This always seems to be the way.  He presses a kiss to the skin on David’s shoulder, snuggles closer even than before.

“You worry too much.”

David sniggers.  “So do you.”

Matteo smiles, feels the way David’s body reacts to the movement of his lips.  This feels better already, their bodies now doing what they’ve always wanted to do.  They settle together, heart beats aligning as they both let themselves fully relax into the moment.

“So no more worrying?”

“No more worrying,” David agrees.  “Neither of us is too much and we can cuddle all we like.”

He suits actions to words, wraps his legs around Matteo and hums as he relaxes into the touch.  Following suit, Matteo smiles again.  He may be clingy, but so is David.  And they can be clingy together.