#unapologetically lame humor

[stervrucht]

How I feel after finally finishing that long-ass chapter...

[tsumusamu]

nice receive [miya atsumu x fem!reader]

genre: fluff and (once again, a sad attempt at) humor

word count: 3.8k

summary: eight months into your relationship, atsumu takes you to meet his family. things don't go as planned, but of course, everything ends up alright in the end anyway. alternatively, miya atsumu adores you and his family thinks it's easy to see why.

warnings: uhhh implied sexual content at the end but it is like barely there ok

commission for @ muppetz (it wont let me tag for some reason ugh) thank you so much for commissioning me!

a/n: this ended up being way longer than the word count requested but that’s no one’s fault but my own because i dont know when to shut the FUCK up anyways i hope this one shot is enjoyable lol

content under the cut!

You literally never thought that you would ever end up in this situation.

"C'mon babe, why the long face? Ya nervous or somethin'?"

"No." You purse your lips, huffily averting your gaze from your boyfriend's smirking face.

"Ya don't needa be like that." Atsumu drapes an arm across your shoulder, pecking your forehead as a sort of reassurance. "No one could ever hate this cute face, after all." He accentuates his words by squishing your cheeks, drawing out a yelp of protest from you.

"If you keep talking like this, you're gonna jinx it, you know." Your words come out softer and more hesitant than intended, and you startled even yourself at how utterly anxious you sound.

"Yer gonna be fine. Trust me, I wouldn’t take just any random girl to meet my folks, and they’re well aware of that." Atsumu ruffles your hair.

"I just... I hope they're not..." You pause for a moment, trying to find the right word. "...Disappointed?" You grimace when your boyfriend suddenly throws his head back in such voracious laughter, that you swear you saw a few hysterical tears.

"Are ya jokin'?" he all but wheezes. "Yer the libero for the national volleyball team, for God's sake. If anythin', I'd be the disappointment here."

"'Tsumu — " you start, but he interrupts you by pulling you in for a comforting hug.

"Don't worry yer pretty head anymore, got it?" he murmurs into your ear. "Yer wonderful, and I couldn't be luckier to have ya. My parents are gonna love ya. Honest."

A small smile tugs at your lips as you reach around his back to hug him back. "I hope so."

A year ago, if someone had told you that you would end up having Miya Atsumu introduce you to his family as his girlfriend, you would've laughed until your ass fell off and your stomach ached like no tomorrow.

You had been absolutely overjoyed when you were chosen for the women's national volleyball team, and you were so eager to start playing with your new teammates that you had decided to attend the national team's training camp without hesitation despite your recent knee injury at the time. However, you completely overlooked the fact that you would be working with the men's team as well, which would've been completely fine... if not for Miya Atsumu.

When you first met Atsumu, he was the cocky, annoying little shit of a setter for the Japanese men's national volleyball team, someone who you were stuck training with for the next two weeks.

You still remember the first words he ever spoke to you.

"The hell are ya doin' there, lil libero? If yer not gonna be able to save the easiest ones, then ya might as well sub out."

You also remember the first thought you had about him.

'Prick.'

And the first words you spoke to him.

"Can't you look at this — " You had gestured angrily to the knee brace supporting you. "And take a fucking hint, or what?"

He had sent some unapologetic, biting words right back at you and that marked the beginning of the time you have had the utmost pleasure of knowing Miya Atsumu. The two of you had bickered rather relentlessly (not too unlike literal children, despite the both of you being well into your twenties) throughout the rest of the camp, and by the end, for some unknown reason through some unknown method, he ended up with your number.

He started texting you constantly, and as much as you tried to convince your foolish self that he was just a nuisance, you found yourself responding to his messages like an idiot anyway. Throughout the next few months, you learned that Atsumu was far more than just his overly confident demeanor; he's genuinely kind-hearted, down-to-earth, and actually kinda hilarious. And eventually — neither of you quite knew how — the two of you were staring across a table at each other in a fancy restaurant as if daring the other to blink and lose an unspoken game, on a first date that neither of you thought would go as well as it did.

A little over eight months into your happy and committed relationship, Atsumu suggested that the two of you go to his hometown in Hyogo for a weekend to visit his family. You had immediately agreed with his idea, excited to meet his parents and twin brother in person, but now that he's leading you out of your shared hotel room to go do just that, your stomach's knotting uncomfortably.

Atsumu's been nothing but supportive and comforting ever since you started showing that you're nervous to meet his family. He was always happy to provide a never-ending flow of cheesy words and warm hugs, but you're genuinely afraid of embarrassing yourself. You want to impress his family and not have them see you as undeserving of their son, who you truly care for from the bottom of your heart. Atsumu is your first long-term boyfriend, and you would jump off your roof if you managed to mess anything up during the visit to his folks.

The taxi ride to Atsumu's childhood home doesn't do much to soothe your nerves either, with you fiddling with your fingers the entire way through while Atsumu makes small talk with the driver. As the cab pulls up to the address that your boyfriend had provided earlier, you instinctively clench your fists so hard that you think you might bleed.

A look of alarm crosses Atsumu's face as he notices that you're still just as anxious as you were when you left the hotel earlier. He thought that the ride to his parents' house would give you some time to cool down, but that had clearly not been the case. His eyebrows furrow in concern as he reaches over to grab one of your hands in his, giving you a comforting squeeze.

"Just breathe, darlin'." He runs his thumb over the shallow nail marks embedded in your skin. "If it means anything to ya, my mom's a huge fan of yers. For real. I didn't tell ya this before, but she's especially excited to meet ya. Keeps yappin' to me askin' how I pulled ya." You flush.

"R-Really?" you stammer, wide-eyed.

"Really. Who wouldn't be a fan yers?" Atsumu grins, pecking your nose. "See, ya got nothin' to be worried about. Just chill out and be yerself, 'kay?" You nod, some of the tension releasing from your shoulders as Atsumu leads you out of the cab, hand still clutching yours.

You're feeling a little better now, though your thoughts are still running through your head at the pace of a mile a minute as you watch Atsumu pay the taxi driver and thank him for the ride. Atsumu's mother is my fan? Your ears start to heat up. I hope I can somehow live up to her expectations of me…

“Ma! We’re here!” Atsumu shouts at the top of lungs approximately one second after simultaneously ringing the doorbell and obnoxiously pounding on the door.

“Comin’, comin’, ya brat!” A feminine, yet strong voice hollers in return. You freeze on the spot, your mind going blank once again. It’s happening. It’s finally happening.

The door aggressively swings open, revealing a middle-aged woman wearing a pink apron and carrying a wooden spatula in her hand. Her dark hair is pulled into a bun away from her face and her eyes, the same chocolate brown as Atsumu’s, are gleaming with annoyance. She briefly glares at Atsumu for his rowdy entrance before her gaze catches onto you, and her entire face lights up with excitement.

“(L/N) (Y/N)! It’s so nice to finally meet you!”

“M-Mrs. Miya,” you stammer out, trying your best to smile but you’re sure it looked more like a wince. “It’s good to m-meet you t-too.”

"Aw, hey now. What happened to my feisty girl? It's not like ya to be so lame.” Atsumu lays his forearm on your head, effectively using you as an armrest. You jerk away, scowling.

“Shut the hell up, asshat,” you snap without thinking. About half a second later, regret slams into your body like a truck. Oh, shit. I just called my boyfriend an asshat in front of his mother. You were about to run off into the streets in utter embarrassment if not for Mrs. Miya letting out a hearty laugh way too similar to her son’s and linking arms with you.

“No need to look so scared, dear. I don’t bite. And it’s good to see that yer willin’ to put this brat in his place.”

“Ma!” Atsumu whines, pouting petulantly.

“Yer really losin’ out with him though, y’know,” Mrs. Miya whispers to you as she leads you into the house by your arm. “I’ve got another son; Atsumu’s twin. Osamu’s quite well-behaved. If yer just likin’ the looks, he would be the better option.” You can tell she’s joking by the merry twinkle in her eyes, but instead of humoring her you end up shaking your head with a quiet chuckle.

“I think Atsumu’s perfectly good for me.” The two of you pause to watch Atsumu practically sprint into the kitchen, and a few moments later there’s an agitated yell as proof that he was on his way to annoy his brother. You smile. “He makes me really happy, Mrs. Miya. You raised him well.”

“Aren’t ya just the sweetest thing?” Mrs. Miya coos at you, pinching your left cheek. “And so pretty too. I swear ya could probably clobber my brat at volleyball as well. You and yer teammate… ah, Miss Amanai? The two of you always caught my eye while I watched yer matches. Make sure ya let her know.”

You blush a little and thank her, making a mental note to tell Kanoka that. She’d probably find it extremely amusing, especially since she was the one who had given Atsumu your number in the first place (which, as you had found out months later, was because he had practically groveled at her feet multiple times. Dumbass.)

“Come meet my husband, (Y/N).” Mrs. Miya leads you into the living room, where an older, balding man with rimmed glasses is quietly flipping through a book. He gives a start upon hearing your entrance, clearing his throat and sitting up straight.

“Ah, hello!” Mr. Miya greets you. “I’ve heard a lot about you! From both Atsumu and the missus.”

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Miya.” You nod once in a respectful manner.

“It’s about time that he settled down with a nice girl. Make sure ya keep him in line though, got it, missy?”

“Of course I w — “ you start, but Mrs. Miya is already dragging you towards the kitchen. You smile apologetically at Mr. Miya, and he just laughs and waves.

“Osamu’s makin’ dinner right now. He is such a hardworkin’ and dedicated boy. Both of them are, really,” she rambles. “But Osamu sure can cook a mean meal. He and his twin always used to fight over who’s the better cook. But I betcha Atsumu hasn’t touched the stove since he left for university years ago.”

You debate telling her that Atsumu had made quite a decent meal for the two of you just last week to celebrate your eight-month anniversary (which you hadn’t even known he remembered), but before you can formulate the right words in your head you’re suddenly shoved in the path of an unfamiliar man. Well, not really unfamiliar. He has the same face as the boyfriend who you see every day, after all.

Miya Osamu is (as expected) the literal carbon copy of Atsumu; same strong eyebrows, same hooded eyes, same angular jawline. The only thing that easily sets them apart is his black, ruffled mess of hair in stark contrast with your boyfriend’s bleached blonde.

Mrs. Miya pulls Atsumu away from the two of you, demanding that he help her with some mundane task, leaving you and Osamu by yourselves in the kitchen.

An easy smile graces his lips as he sticks out his hand. “Hey, I’m Osamu. Honored to finally meet the famous (L/N) (Y/N).” You smile back, gripping his hand firmly and shaking.

“And I’m honored to meet the famous ‘Samu.” At your words, Osamu bursts out laughing.

“Man, I don’t really let a lot of people call me that, y’know? But if yer gonna be part of the family, you could be an exception.”

“F-Family?” You pause, your sudden confidence dissipating as fast as it had come.

“Naw, no pressure. Just sayin’.” Osamu casually continues with his task of shaping onigiri. “I can tell he really likes ya.” You raise your eyebrows in curiosity without entirely meaning to. “I mean, we’re twins, it’s like a sixth sense. And also he never shuts up about ya when we text or call.”

“I hope you’re hearing all good things?” you quip jokingly.

“Oh, for sure. If I didn’t know who you were I’d think that he’s talkin’ about the reincarnation of a goddess with the way he talks.”

“Seriously?” You snort, and Osamu just laughs.

“So I’d like to ask ya the favor of continuin’ to take care of him. Guy’s just a huge ass baby. I can obviously see that yer good for him, though. He wouldn’t have stayed for so long if he wasn’t serious.”

The two of you briefly glance at Atsumu helping his mother set the table. They’re currently debating over whether Atsumu should go back to his natural hair color and “Stop makin’ yer hair look like fuckin’ straw!”

“He is a huge ass baby,” you start seriously, causing Osamu to smirk. “But he’s an honest and good person, so I’m not too bothered. I’ll take care of him, promise.”

“Thanks.” Osamu sighs, glancing rather fondly in his brother’s direction. “He’s an asshole, but at least he’s a redeemable asshole. I’m glad he’s finally got someone around to take care of him. Makes us all feel a little more relieved since he’s away from home.”

You suddenly feel warm inside.

Atsumu had been right; you truly didn’t have anything to be afraid of. The Miyas have been nothing but kind and welcoming so far, and they even seem to already have a positive opinion of you.

“Can ya help me carry these to the table?” Osamu holds out a plate of freshly-made onigiri.

“Ah, sure!” you accept hurriedly, taking the plate from him with careful hands. You take slow, calculated steps towards the dining room; the last thing you want is to accidentally drop any of the food.

Atsumu and his parents are already waiting in the dining room, and they all look up at you expectantly as you approach them with the onigiri plate in hand.

“Why, thank you, dear!” Mrs. Miya chirps. “Helpin’ Osamu out! How sweet of ya — “

She’s cut off as disaster strikes.

You trip on your last step to the table, causing a single onigiri to tumble off the plate and towards the floor. Your mouth drops open wide as you practically slam the plate down on the table and in practical slow-motion, watch the onigiri plummet down, down, down —

Then you dive.

You dive towards the floor, in the same manner as you do when you’re digging for a volleyball.

And you catch the rice ball in one hand, laying flat on your stomach. You have a moment of mental celebration; yes, you caught the onigiri! Then you realize that you look like a fucking idiot as you lay face down with one hand extended and clutching a rice ball like it’s your lifeline.

There’s a few seconds of agonizing silence.

You want the earth to swallow you whole.

There’s no way that you could ever show your face in front of Atsumu’s family or even Atsumu himself now; God you’ve never been more embarrassed in your life, and over an onigiri too —

“Nice receive!” Atsumu suddenly bellows, clapping his hands boisterously. “(L/N) does it again!”

His brother, who’s standing a few feet behind you with a platter of chicken skewers, pumps his free fist into the air and joins in with a “Hell yeah!”

Mr. Miya starts laughing the same loud Miya laugh that you’ve heard way too many times today, and his sons soon follow suit. Shame is still flooding your body, but now you’re realizing just how ridiculous the whole situation is and you resist the urge to smile at your own stupidity. As soon as Mrs. Miya recovers from her initial surprise, she comes to help you up, and you can tell that she’s doing her best not to laugh as well.

“Are ya okay, dear?” she briefly inspects you for any sign of injury.

“All good here, Mrs. Miya.” You smile, genuinely and comfortably, as Atsumu comes behind you to wrap his arms around you and peck your cheek, still chuckling with a small note of pride. “All good.”

-

“See?” Atsumu’s smug as hell as the two of you enter the hotel elevator on your way up to your room. Osamu had dropped you off so there would be no need for another cab. “I told ya that they’d fuckin’ love ya.”

“Why’re you rubbing in something like this?” You scoff, dodging when he tries to pull you into a crushing hug.

“Because I was right.” He smirks. You roll your eyes to heaven.

“Well, you can’t blame me for being nervous! I still can’t believe that none of them got upset at me for diving for a rice ball at the dinner table.” You groan, hiding your face in your hands.

“Nah, why the hell would they? It was cool. Yer cool, Miss National Team Libero.” He laughs, reaching for you again and this time you let him bring you close to him. “Besides, like I said before, who could ever resist yer pretty lil face?”

“You’re a hopeless asshole.” You sigh, and Atsumu of course just chuckles, his laughter vibrating against your ear as you press yourself into his chest.

“I’m yer hopeless asshole.” He pecks the top of your head. “C’mon, babe. It’s our floor.”

You hadn’t realized how tired you are until the two of you enter your hotel room and you see the large, inviting bed. You practically jump onto it, burying your face into a pillow. “Goodnight…” you mumble sleepily.

“Ya gotta go shower and brush yer teeth first, idiot.” A pillow smacks you in the side of the head, and you leap up with a cry of surprise. “Damn, don’t be so loud, sweetheart. It’s late, y’know. Don’t wanna get a noise complaint like last night.” You turn bright red at the reminder.

“Shut u-up,” you retort. “I told you that we shouldn’t have tried to do it on the balcony.”

“It was fun, though, y’know! An experience. And ya sounded like you were enjoyin’ it, anyway.” He chucks another pillow at you, and you yelp as it nails you in the face. “Now get yer cute ass over here, we’re gonna shower.”

“You can’t make me.” You stubbornly lay back down and close your eyes, and you had peace for all but ten seconds before Atsumu’s plucking you off the bed and settling you into his arms bridal-style. Your eyes shoot open in shock and you flail desperately. “Put me down!”

“No can do. I’m not sleepin’ next to yer stinky self tonight, darlin’.” Atsumu laughs as you scowl.

“The floor’s always open for you,” you snap.

“Aw, yer no fun.” He steals a kiss from you in the blink of an eye; the only evidence of there being contact at all is a tingling feeling on your lips. You feel your heart melt just a little more.

“Fine. After we shower, we go straight to bed. Got it?”

“ And brush our teeth. Yer mornin’ breath is bad enough.” He lets out quite an unpleasant squawk when you smack him lightly in the shoulder. “Alright, sorry, sorry.”

“Is this just your excuse to see me naked?” you tease him as he sets you down on the bathroom counter before immediately removing his shirt to reveal his muscled torso. He grins wolfishly at you and shrugs.

“And if it is?” Atsumu’s eyes are zeroed in on the small hickey he had left right below your collarbone last night, which is now visible thanks to the way your shirt had rumpled after he had practically manhandled you into the bathroom.

“Well, I won’t complain.” You follow his gaze down to your neck, before glancing back up to meet his eyes and raise an eyebrow at him. “If you’re going to make it worth my time.”

About an hour later, the two of you are lying in bed together, effectively tuckered out and finally ready to sleep. Atsumu’s strong arms are wrapped tightly around you like a protective cocoon as you snuggle your face against his chest. The slow, steady rhythm of his heartbeat rocks you towards dreamland, and all the worries from the past day are slipping away.

“Hey, ‘Tsumu,” you mumble against his chest. He grunts tiredly.

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

There’s a small silence.

“...Thanks,” you finally say after a beat.

“Huh? For what?” he quips.

“For being patient with me today, even though I was so nervous. And for taking me to meet your family.” You crane your head to look up at him, contentment adorning your features. “I had a good time. I hope they don’t hate the idea of me coming around again sometime.”

Atsumu smiles that familiar smile, the smile filled with affection that others rarely get to see. His eyes are almost half-mooned with joy, his lips are curved up in genuine adoration, and his cheeks are flushed with color. You saw this smile for the first time when he set an incredibly low ball at training camp, earning the awe of everyone in the room, including yourself. Never did you think that you would ever have this expression of pure love aimed at you, nor did you think it would fill you with so much happiness every time you had the blessing of seeing it. He says nothing for a while, suddenly resorting to trailing kisses all over your face. You let him, closing your eyes peacefully as he showers you with his love, ending with one final peck to your nose.

“I'm sure they'd like to have you around again.”

And if Atsumu continues playing his cards right, he thinks there might be a possibility that in the next five or so years, you could truly become part of the family with a glittering ring on your finger.

Only time will tell if that possibility will ever come to fruition, but as you tilt your head up to give him one last kiss on the lips and whisper those three words to him, he knows for sure that he wants to continue building towards that future with you.

“I love you too.” He lets his eyes fall shut as well, before resting his chin atop your head and savoring the warmth of your body against his.

Only time will tell.

-

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general taglist (italics for people i could not tag):  @aomineavenue @intheawks​ @deltahemm​ @bap-kingdom @shegoeshexing @brinnnx @crescentsteel​ @ dokidokisama @smellssharpies​ @dearhajime​ @plutoxxxworld​ @kritiiiii​ @ muppetz @ iscreamtea @rizzyrisso​ @makeitrainonsomehoes​ @maraudusk​ @kybabi​ @tsumue​ @thischickwritessometimes​ @angrylittleriri​

[thanatos-moon]

Kat, ma'am, you mean something to me. like you know that post you reblogged and tagged as "true love"? that's me bitch. i check your blog daily and catch up on anything i've missed, i think about you at least three times a day, i'm always sending you good vibes (sometimes simping vibes), and i'm always so happy when you make a personal post about doing well. i know that you have struggles we don't even know about, and that you've been through hell, but you're such an incredibly strong person, and your character is constantly so inspring, if occasionally intimidating. like i know you don't have all your shit together, but you're so unapologetically yourself that it's addicting. it makes me want to embrace who i am and be strong and stop letting people push me around or tell me how i should be. you're beautiful, funny, sweet, aggressive, kind, and your personality and sense of humor are outta this world babe. you got it all, and i know that don't take the pain away, but please know that there are people who ADORE you and are constantly wanting the best for you 🖤

I keep rereading this ask because it's just so....genuine and kind and I just...... damn you make me soft 💕💕 whenever someone tells me that they think about me during the day.... It's like...I do exist outside from the internet for you and I....just.......,.. I'm so honoured I can't even express my feelings properly I'm sorry I'm kinda lame but I promise I appreciate you a lot! And thank you for complimenting my character and personality, this means the world to me!

I will encourage you to be yourself more because you seem like an amazing person! You do not deserve to be pushed around by others. You deserve people who genuine like you and want the best for you! You deserve to have people around you who inspire you and their energy makes you feel safe and valid! Thank you for having my back love and thank you for caring about me and paying attention! You deserve the world! I wish I could give you something back, I'm sending you all my positive energy 💕💕💕

[arigatouiris]

the tinder date // shinshou hitoshi

Author’s Note: I am in LOVE with @myherowritings​ ‘You Suck at Gaming’ so I wanted to do something in appreciation, albeit a bit differently! So, this happened to me irl haha so I wanted to write about it~ I turned the real guy into Shinsou so that no one would know hahahaha I’m such a creep oh my god 

Word count: 3046

Pairing: Modern! Shinsou Hitoshi x Reader

Warnings: fluff, humor, smau 

❝

You never really wanted to use Tinder to meet new people, but ever since a terrible breakup, your friends, your classmates, your goddamn mind told you that you needed a push and maybe, just maybe, Tinder might do good. 

You weren’t a fan of the idea of meeting people using an app, which honestly, came across the same as buying groceries where some things were available and some things weren’t—you believed you couldn’t do that with people, and you believed with all your heart that people weren’t meant to be either swiped right on or swiped left on. Your heart was already weak as it was, and there was no way you were ready to emotionally invest in something real; at least for the time being.

So that lonely Friday night, you downloaded the app, created your profile, chose the perfect bio after 14 attempts at writing something about yourself, each time forgetting a vital piece of information. You didn’t start swiping right away, something about the process scared you—but there you were, mentally preparing yourself, telling yourself that it was okay, you were going to meet people on these dates and maybe, the app might be good for you, after all. 

You have heard success stories of people meeting via Tinder and having a great relationship and all that; some even find their best friends on the app, which is weird despite the social stigma attached to an app like Tinder. Some of your friends even know people who have gotten married and that’s the tea. You were not ready for either of those, maybe you’d get some coffee with a cute chap and maybe, just maybe, hold hands.

Alright, fine, make out or whatever.

But the prospect felt so wrong, you didn’t know what you would do if he turned out to be a creep. So, bucking it all up, swallowing your pride or what was left of it, you started to look at the men Tinder presented to you.

The very first picture was of a boy whose face revolted you—and if you thought that sounded rude, wait until you start complaining about the grapes he had for hair. 

The second boy was decent, but you were not going for decent on this app. You wanted something written on the bio—something that they were willing to communicate with, something you could identify with, something you can vibe with; and if you didn’t find anything like that, despite how cute the guy can be, you are swiping left on that ass.

It was after what felt like a thousand left swipes did you find someone a least bit attractive. But, you blinked—there was an odd feature under his profile; it was marked blue with a star.

Immediately opening WhatsApp, you texted your friend, Ochako, asking her what it was. Ochako being Ochako instantly called you.

     “Someone super liked you in less than an hour!?”

What in the world was a ‘super like’?

     “Ocha-chan, what’s a ‘super like?’” You rubbed your eyeball as you continued, “And what does it have to do with the fact that I’ve been on this app for less than an hour—”

     “Most super likes are usually done by creeps,” Uraraka didn’t hold back, “But sometimes, if someone really finds you attractive or interesting, you get a super like from a very decent guy. I heard one of my classmate’s brother’s friends met his boyfriend via the ‘super like’ feature!”

     “Y-Yeah, I’m not... I’m not looking for—”

     “It just means that whoever this person is, finds you interesting! So go through his profile and let me know what you think!”

You ended the call right then before going back on the app, finding his profile still open. You wouldn’t lie, he was very attractive—not in the way most people would flaunt over, but you couldn’t take your eyes off him. There was something about the way he was lazily smiling at the camera, or how the light fell on his lavender hair, or how he looked so unapologetically as himself. You then went on to read his bio.

If you matched not to start a conversation, then don’t swipe right. Being left alone is easy. 

It wasn’t all of the bio but this part of the bio somehow stuck to you. It was incredibly honest—and wasn’t the usual ‘interested in trekking’ or fancy words like ‘selenophile’ (words that you had to google basically). You noticed that in one of his pictures, he had a tattoo—of a particular animal but it was so minimalistic you could barely recognize it from the odd angle in the picture.

You swiped right and the pop up appeared ‘It’s a Match!’. Your heart skipped a beat for god knows what and you gulped, wondering what would come next. You didn’t even hold back before looking at the new chat screen. You gulped before shutting your phone and lying back on your bed, wondering what the ideal time to send him a message would be. 

Swallowing your leftover pride, you opened the chat once more and went ahead with, “Please don’t mind my stalker tendencies, but what is that tattoo on your hand?” You wanted to clarify some more that you were not a stalker, but held back.

You closed the app and felt your stomach grumble. This was the start of something—you were sure of that much, but you weren’t sure of what. And this person, Hitoshi, whose last name you did not know, seemed very interesting.

*

The next morning, you woke up to a Tinder notification. Your stomach flipped as the purple-haired boy’s face was your first thought and you instantly opened the message where he had explained that it was a tattoo of his cat.

Your heart melted at this gesture but you reminded yourself that you didn’t even know this person and there was no use feeling warm over one sentence. But, what came next sent your heart on overdrive.

Your eyes widened as you read the messages one by one,

You closed the app and almost screamed, but held yourself back; you figured this was a bad idea because the sound really needed to come out of you and you squealed like a dying animal just seconds after. You needed to tell someone this, but before that, you had to reply to that. You opened the app again with trembling fingers before figuring out what could be the most appropriate response to something like that.

Haha; No, that’s too lame. 

You’re so funny!; No fucking way! 

Ughh, what do I say? What do I say?! You had reached a slump. You had no words. So, you did what you do best—you went with your gut.

You slapped yourself in the forehead. There was no way you were going to live past this one—

You chuckled. He’s funny. You quickly were about to type a response before he added, “Just wanted to have a good conversation with someone new. Not intending on using this app to fornicate like lonely bunnies.”

You stared at the message before feeling a soft smile crawl on to your features. You felt the same, but this wasn’t supposed to happen, right? You weren’t supposed to agree with whatever a random Tinder match was saying, right? It wasn’t supposed to be this easy.

You replied, Same. Intending on great conversations because somehow, that’s taken the backseat these days.

No one really talks anymore, you thought before waiting for his reply. You didn’t know where this conversation would go, really, but you were intending on finding out. You never really chatted with anyone on Tinder before but you were curious as to why he super-liked you, and what this person had in store for you. It was strange, but you enjoyed this feeling. It wasn’t a crush, it had no expectations attached to it—yet, there was a fresh excitement bubbling in your stomach at the mere thought of some stranger talking to you.

You and Hitoshi kept chatting during random points of the day. You’d be cooking for yourself (since it was a weekend), or you’d be taking a dump or you’d try to take a nap—and a simple ping would send your heart to the skies. You didn’t know him for that long, it had been less than a whole day since you two matched, but somehow, talking to him about random things really helped keep your spirits high. You felt genuinely happy—and the excitement kept you going.

You stared at the conversation and wondered why it wasn’t as easy with people you really did know in life. You wondered why people didn’t have time for conversation unless it’s a stranger—isn’t that the entire point of it all? To talk, to spread joy, to ponder on life’s meaninglessness together?

You blinked. Boarding a flight? To where? You wanted to ask, but you really didn’t want to come across as some prying clingy individual. You were curious though.

Oh! Where to?

You hoped that the message sounded less inquisitive and more cheerful for god knows what reason.

Going to Reykjavik for a week. Always wanted to see the lights.

He’s going to... ICELAND?! You felt strangely excited and disappointed, but the fact that he had no obligation to meet you stung.

However—

Your heart shot to the skies. You wanted to respond immediately, but you held back. Clearing your throat, you replied earnestly.

Sure. Looking forward to it! 

And that was that.

*

You never knew how well you could jump to overthinking, especially when it came to strangers. You knew Hitoshi (whatever his last name was) was in Iceland right now, and that only meant that considering the time differences, there would be little to no text messages.

What you didn’t understand was why you got no notifications in three days. A suspicious thing, because Tinder usually throws a thousand notifications at you especially when you don’t want to check them. So, being the inquisitive little cat that you are, you opened the app. Only to find that your account on Tinder is banned.

     “What...” You blinked a couple of times before closing the app and opening it again, “What the fuck!?”

You didn’t know what to do at this point. How could it have been banned? There were no ill comments, no ugly or obscene photographs of you from your end, then why did Tinder ban your account?

You went through the community guidelines and found nothing. Your heart was breaking—Hitoshi must have thought you unmatched him (Ochaco once told you that if you unmatch someone’s profile, they won’t see your chats anymore). You couldn’t even log in, you couldn’t even let him know that it was Tinder cockblocking you and not you being an idiot. Oh, god, why!? You screamed into your pillow, wondering how this could have happened before calling Ochako to help calm you down.

     “How the hell can they ban you?” She asked, causing you to roll your eyes.

     “If I knew that then I would have done something else, Ocha-chan!”

     “Okay, okay. So let’s do this. Find him on Facebook and send him a message saying Tinder banned you. It has to be a bug from their end. I’ve read that it happens to a lot of random profiles.”

You blinked. Really? Or was she simply just trying to pacify you? You didn’t care, you needed the pacifying.

     “But, I don’t know his surname...”

     “(y/n)-chan,” Ochako took a deep breath, “You spoke to him for two days and you didn’t take his surname!?”

You undermined yourself pretty hard in the past, but right now, it had reached the pinnacle of it all. You felt low, you had lost the prospect of not only great conversations but a cute boy who even asked you out.

     “Try finding him on LinkedIn.” Ochako said, and you blinked.

     “LinkedIn?”

You could practically hear her nod, “Yeah. Just type in his workplace or education, whatever you remember from the Tinder app, and his first name. It should show you a result that matches.”

You couldn’t wait to try. You opened your laptop, while Ochako was on call, and did exactly as she told you. You typed in ‘Hitoshi’ and then his workplace, some gaming studio—for the life of you you couldn’t pronounce it, and your eyes widened. The first result was ‘Shinsou Hitoshi’.

     “Oh my God,” You gasped, “I found him!”

Ochako giggled, “Is it really him?”

     “I’d really not mistake that face anywhere, Ocha-chan! You’re a genius!”

     “Of course,” She said, giggling, “Send him a message then!”

Doubt said hello a second after, “But what if he thinks I’m some stalker?”

     “Tell him your account got banned. Just be honest. He might even appreciate the effort.”

You weren’t too sure about that, actually. Your hand ghosted over his profile before attempting to send a message; but, apparently, LinkedIn wouldn’t let you send a message to someone new—someone you didn’t already have any connections with. When you mentioned this to Ochako, you wondered if you were the stalker or if she was.

     “He’s on Facebook, (y/n)-chan. Just go for it!”

You gulped before opening Facebook, wondering all the while if this was entirely normal for anyone to do for a Tinder date, before typing in his name. It was the same picture he had put of himself on Tinder, and you gulped, unsure of what to send. Again, you did what you do best—went with your gut.

Hey! This is (y/n), from Tinder. So long story short, my account got banned and idek why. I just wanted to let you know that I didn’t unmatch/ghost you. I didn’t want to leave you hanging so I turned into an interim stalker to let know you this. Is there any way we can contact each other besides Tinder?

You breathed slowly, as slowly as you possibly could. You could feel a weird numbness asphyxiating you, unaware of how to proceed or what would happen next. You shut your eyes and released a breath, before falling back on the bed.

     “What’s wrong?” You could hear the worry in Ochako’s voice.

     “I don’t know...” Nothing made sense anymore.

Did you like Shinsou? You weren’t sure—but what you were sure of was how little you knew him. Was that enough? Was the fact that you had never met come into play here? Just because the conversation was easy? Or was it merely the idea of meeting someone through a dating app? You couldn’t like him. Maybe, it was a crush.

But, can you have a crush on someone you didn’t even know?

You heard a ping and you felt that familiar stomach flipping sensation you knew so well in school. You never realized how much that feeling was missed ever since you grew up.

You were quite practically rolling and squealing at the same time. Ochako joined you, not knowing what the reply was but she was merely just happy for you. 

     “He replied!”

     “In like ten minutes! So fast!”

You didn’t know how he could reply, considering the time difference and everything, but that didn’t matter. He had given you his number, and you were going to text him and that was that. 

     “So, should I text him now?”

Ochako hummed, “Not now. Wait till the morning.”

So, you waited until the next morning. As soon as you woke up, you remembered the details Ochako had given you and you carefully composed a message in your head. Saving the number into your contacts, you tried to send him a message—but it failed.

Heh? You thought before trying again, with each attempt failing each time. You felt nervous, wondering if something was wrong with your phone, before realizing you were late for work. 

Ugh, you thought before sending him another message, not bothered to tell Ochako about this.

Hey, so I can’t seem to send you a message, why don’t you ping me instead? It’s xy-xyx-xxxxx. 

As soon as you reached work, you forgot entirely that you had even sent him that message. For some reason, your manager seemed to know you had other things in your mind and was intending on squeezing the life out of you. You had never worked so hard in the entirety of your life but that Thursday, you felt God’s wrath. After 9 hours of painful clock time, you began to head home, feeling incredibly tired and done with everything there was about adulthood.

You checked your phone for the first time in 9 hours and your heart skipped a beat. Shinsou had sent you two messages, one on Facebook—

—and one on WhatsApp.

You freaked before replying to him, apologizing for the wait—apologizing internally a thousand times; and wondered if you’d get a response real quick. Judging from where you were, you realized you needed to get home first.

As soon as you reached home, you threw your bag on the bed and checked your phone again—nothing. You sighed before getting some food, constantly looking over at your phone, wondering what had gotten into you, wondering if you were the only one flipping over a Tinder date like this. You were sure Shinsou wouldn’t be responding the same way; he was in Iceland, he probably wasn’t even thinking of you! And yet, here you were, thinking about him all through your day.

You felt strangely pathetic. Were you so lonely that you couldn’t live without this minor excitement that a random stranger was giving you? It felt so odd.

You spent the next two days, not texting him. You wondered if you were intentionally ghosting him, but he hadn’t texted you either. You felt low, being proven that he had better things to do, but you had gotten your answer. Serves you right that you were excited over someone you didn’t even know. Serves you right for jumping over your head for a Tinder match. 

You sighed before hearing the familiar ‘ping’ of your phone.

You smiled a bit, feeling the sides of your cheek hurt. 

Sure, but won’t you be tired?

It was a second later did Shinsou reply to that. You stared as the conversation rolled on, before knowing for a fact that you weren’t meeting him tomorrow. Maybe on Tuesday? You thought, giving yourself the benefit of the doubt.

His message only proved that he did want to see you. So, that means, you weren’t the only one wanting to see the other person. This being clarified to you made it easier for you to accept your obsession over the purple-haired male, but you had to restrain yourself.

When Tuesday morning rolled by, you were very close to giving up. You texted Ochako all day, asking her if he had given up interest in you or if you were annoying or clingy or desperate and she assured you that you were neither of those things. She told you that you were overthinking, that Shinsou was probably busy, he went back to work after Iceland, so maybe he had a lot to catch up on.

You didn’t know when you took a blow to your confidence, but you had and it bothered you. You wondered if it was alright to test everything on one random Tinder match, but you sighed, giving up the entire thought process. You raged inside your head, but there was very little clarity left. You decided to let the day pass and see if he was going to text you.

He didn’t. 

It ran past 12 p.m. You had lunch on your own, staring at your phone the whole time, wondering if he had forgotten even. You felt your energy reduce in intensity before spamming Ochako about what to do. 

You couldn’t bear the thought of him losing interest in you, and you didn’t know why. He seemed interested, your conversations were really fun—you had a few things in common and he asked you out twice! 

What went wrong? Was he really that busy? Was he bored with you? Was he cat-fishing you?

It was then you saw a message pop in.

Hey, sorry about not texting. I’ve come down with a cold. The date’ll need to wait.

Your heart skipped three beats. You sighed before wondering why you hadn’t thought of the possibility of him being sick. You replied a genuine, ‘take care’, but in your heart—it was as if the universe was saying this wasn’t going to happen. You didn’t bother to see his further replies; you weren’t blaming him for being sick, you were blaming yourself for being so overtly excited by someone you didn’t know.

He’s just a Tinder match, you thought before collapsing on your bed after coming home. 

Ochako called you that night, and you revealed to her in detail about what you were feeling.

     “What’s wrong?”

You sighed, “I'm lonely. And I'm lonely in some horribly deep way and for a flash of an instant, I can see just how lonely, and how deep this feeling runs. And it scares the shit out of me to be this lonely because it seems catastrophic.” 

Ochako was quiet. 

     “Do you think Tinder was a bad idea?”

You scoffed, “It has to be. It just showed me how lonely I am. That’s what these apps do! They show you how pathetic you are, how lonely you are on the inside and it’s just... It just sucks.”

You don’t remember falling asleep that night. It was a Friday, and you knew what work had in store for you. However, you had nothing on your mind—you forced the thought of Shinsou to the back of your mind before walking into work with a clear head. You worked all day, ate lunch alone, worked again—not checking your phone, not bothered to read or be interested in anything remotely online. 

As soon as work was done, from the corner of your eye, you noticed notifications. You shook your head before rushing on home, before realizing you weren’t watching where you were going. 

Your office was on an incredibly important street. Sometimes, you met people you never thought you’d meet—schoolmates, enemies from the past, old teachers. You were thankful that you worked in such a location but sometimes, just sometimes, the fact that you worked on such a busy street proved to be a tad bit too... cliche.

You look up and your eyes met with purple locks and wide black eyes, shocked at seeing your form just as shocked as you were seeing his.

     “(y/n)?”

You blinked, gasped and stood up straight.

     “Did you follow me?”

Shinsou chuckled, “I think this is what they’d call a coincidence.”

Your cheeks suddenly felt warm, and you wondered how in the world he had shown up there before—

—his arm extended forward, a soft smile on his features.

     “Can I take you out for coffee then? You can’t imagine how long I’ve been waiting.”

I can’t imagine? You giggled before shaking his hand, I think I can.

❞

[nightwingshero]

2, 5, 10, 16, 18 and 22 for Blair and Wren 💜

Thank you, love!!!

Blair

2. What is their dream vacation?

Answered here!

5. Have they ever cheated on anyone before?

Answered here!

10. Introvert or Extrovert?

Answered here!

16. If they could describe themselves in one sentence, what would they say?

“I’m a nerd, but at least I know what I’m talking about.” Something along those lines. Either a reference to her knowledge and intelligence, her level of (fun) nerdism, or that she’s a good person.  

18. What makes them laugh?

Blair has a great sense of humor and is usually happy, so it’s easy to make her laugh. She loves pop culture references, lame jokes, pranks, and a good funny story. It just comes so damn easily, she just needs to be having a good time, which she enjoys the small things in life. Even Leonard’s snarky comments that aren’t supposed to be funny make her laugh and it throws him off a bit, even if he won’t admit it (she’s snarked back a time or two, but we don’t talk about that).

22. How do they react to criticism?

It depends on how you come across. Martin and Wells have mentored her, and her reactions to each of them can, and will, vary. H.R. and Evil Wells (who she worked alongside, so that messes her up when its revealed he’s evil) have better bedside manners than Earth-2 Wells, and while they get along for the most part, they do clash from time to time, but she respects the hell out of him. She only finds H.R. amusing (because he literally knows nothing about science or what they’re doing). Martin’s criticisms are more well-received because she has always looked up to him, but sometimes his ego will rub her the wrong way when they disagree on something, which rarely happens since they’re usually on the same page when it comes to doing science stuff.

Wren

2. What is their dream vacation?

Greece! She loves Greek mythology and the history of it. Plus, there’s warm weather and nice beaches. Wren would be down to traveling or backpacking throughout Europe, as well. Her and Quinn often mused about visiting Russia, and in AUs, they do. Wren just loves learning, loves to just experience newer things away from what she’s known. Even going to Jamaica where Mel lived after leaving Hope County? Yeah, she would love that, too. 

5. Have they ever cheated on anyone before?

Never. Wren is loyal to a fault, unfortunately. She’s committed to those she promises herself to, no matter what, for better or for worse. It took a lot for her to end her relationship with Lilith (who actually cheated on her), and to move on from the professor she uh...had a fling with (who was manipulative). She has a harder time not being loyal to those she loves, toxic or not (even John). Cheating is not in her wheelhouse, it goes against her nature.  

10. Introvert or Extrovert?

Introverted, for sure. She’s learned, over the years, to fit into a crowd, to observe and watch people while seeming she’s extroverted. In all reality, she hates it, she would rather be home and alone, and she dislikes crowds tremendously. Those things were learned for her to survive and to adapt, and it does work in her favor from time to time, but she would just rather eat cheesecake at home and watch The Twilight Zone. 

16. If they could describe themselves in one sentence, what would they say?

“I am who I am, take it or leave it.” Because Wren will never compromise herself for you, she wants to be free--free to be who she wants to be. She’s unapologetic about it and unwavering when it comes to who she is as a person. 

18. What makes them laugh?

Memes, Vines, and pranks. Wren’s sense of humor is sarcastic and mischievous most of the time, and she gets a huge kick at teasing and pranking people. She could get a kick out of anything if it’s amusing enough, but it’s usually dry and sarcastic that gets her attention. Sometimes it can be bubbly and obvious, too, but I mean...she’s just a sarcastic and mischievous person. 

22. How do they react to criticism?

Not well. Wren takes it the wrong way and her feelings get hurt, because she is ruled by her emotions. Her first take on it is “you’re saying I’m not good enough”, and she can very much take huge offence to it. She can lash out wrathfully because of it, or ice you out completely until she takes the time to process what actually happened (letting her emotions chill) and what the intention was behind it. She does take it easier from other people, like Randy and Rowan, than others, like Whitney and Quinn. 

[ilovemygaydad]

Dance, Dance

Part Three: Fairy God-Patton

Based off this post that you really need to read for context!

Pairings: Analogical and Royality (past sleeplogical)

Characters: Virgil, Patton, Logan, Roman, Sleep/Remy, Deceit/Dominic, October/Toby, September/Ember

Warnings: domestic abuse, swearing, sexual humor, crude comments, bullying, making out, abusive deceit, mentions of vomiting (just one word), step parents, food mentions, and possibly something else

A/N: hey so i just wrote a ton on this bus ride to a comp so that’s fun so here have some stuff

Tags: @adultmorelikeadolt​ @disneyfanatic77​ @logan-smarter-than-you-sanders​ @punsterterry​ @mycatshuman​ @fluidityandgiggles @sadpunkrat @theunoriginaldaisy

Masterlist | Ask Blog | READ ON AO3

“Patton, I don’t think I’m going to go to the ball...” Virgil didn’t dare look up from where he was picking away at his nylon tights. He already knew the look that Patton was giving him; he didn’t need to see it.

“What?! Virge, I’ve been working on our dresses for two weeks! You can’t cancel on me the day of!”

“I know, but come on, Pat. It’s Valentine’s day, and we don’t even have dates. It would just be miserable. Guys don’t even know that I exist. At least you’re cute!”

The glare that Patton gave Virgil was hot enough to melt steel. He pushed himself off of his elbows and into a sitting position on Virgil’s bed. “It’s a masquerade! Nobody will know who you are, and you can just flirt with cute guys.”

“Oh my god,” Virgil sighed. “It’s even worse because it’s a masquerade! First of all, you can’t even tell which guys are cute because they’re, you know, wearing a mask.”

“Hush. Let me tell you how this will go. We go to the masquerade ball, and you’ll be able to just be you instead of a fabrication of yourself made by this lame-ass high school hierarchy! Not to mention that you don’t even have to worry about making a fool of yourself because no one will know who you are if you don’t want to reveal your identity. You’ll find some guy who can dance well and looks super hot, and it’ll be--”

Virgil cut him off with a laugh. “Patton, dude, we have got to practice you breathing during rants.”

“Don’t distract me. You’re going to the ball, and that’s final, kiddo.”

“Yeah, righ--shit! I forgot to start cleaning!” Virgil jumped up from his chair and ran out the door.

“Bye!”

“Daddy!” Toby screeched, walking into where Dominic was getting a massage. “We were on our way to get manicures--you know, for the ball?”

“And?”

“And I heard Virgl talking about going to the ball!”

Dominic pushed himself up slightly, looking at his twins. “Oh, no… That won’t do at all.”

“Make him clean my room!” Ember said.

“And my closet! I think something died in there,” added Toby.

“Oh, no. I have a very special place for him to clean…”

“Virgil!”

With a muted groan, Virgil glanced up at Dominic. He was dressed in that stupid yellow bathrobe that he wore after massages, and he had equally ugly slippers on his feet. Virgil fought the urge to roll his eyes. “Yeah?”

“Next week is the twins’ sixteenth birthday--”

“Wait, didn’t they turn sixteen last year?”

Dominic pursed his lips. “Yes, and they will continue to turn sixteen until I tell them to stop. Anyway, you need to have the menu in order by tomorrow so that I can approve it. Oh, and I’m going out clubbing with what’s-his-face tonight, and it’s my turn to throw the afterparty. We will be back by midnight, so I expect that this house will be absolutely spotless upon my return.”

“Dominic, I’ve cleaned every inch of this place.”

“Oh, no, you haven’t.” Dominic smirked. “You’re going to clean my bedroom. Follow me.”

If he hadn’t promised Patton that he’d stay alive through senior year, Virgil probably would have dropped dead that instant from sheer horror. Slowly, he pushed himself up; his feet numbly moved to follow Dominic up the stairs. In the ten years that he’d been living with Dominic, there hadn’t been a single instance where Virgil had gone into Dominic’s room. This was completely uncharted territory.

And, holy shit, it was awful.

Mounds of clothes in all shapes, sizes, and colors were scattered around the room. Old pizza boxes and take-out containers littered every surface, and, god, there was rancid food just laying on the floor. Natural light wouldn’t even filter through the blinds because they were so coated in dust, and the overhead lamp was barely any better. Virgil didn’t even know if this could be classified as a bedroom--it looked and smelled more like a dump.

“Dominic.” Virgil winced as his voice squeaked. “I’d need heavy equipment to clean this place. For example, a flamethrower and thirty gallons of bleach.”

“Don’t sass me, smarty pants! I can still take away your school privileges, too. You can say goodbye to those trendy little friends of yours. Or, should I say, friend, Mr. Not-So-Popular.” Dominic laughed at his joke and turned to leave, but he slipped on something and stumbled. A fucking fish stick. “Oh, and clean up these fish sticks. They’ve been here since Lent.” The door shut as he exited so violently that dust fluttered down from the ceiling fan like gray snow. Virgil sneezed.

“Gross.” While picking his way to the bed, Virgil examined the room. It was so much more disgusting up close than it was from the doorway. Gingerly, so that he wouldn’t accidentally touch anything that had the possibility of killing him, he sat down and picked up the phone, dialing Patton’s number.

“Hey, kiddo! How’s it going?”

“Pat, I can’t go to the ball. Dominic’s making me clean his room tonight, and there’s no way I’ll get done in time.”

“Oh my god,” Patton’s words were slightly jumbled, and Virgil was pretty sure that he was eating a cookie. “You’re in his lair?!”

“Dude, there are species of bugs in here still unknown to science. It’ll take me days to get this done--not even including whatever hell Dominic puts me through for not getting it all clean tonight.”

“I think I have an idea--” Patton was cut off by a click.

“Hello? Virgil, when I said no phone, I meant the landline, too!”

Virgil panicked, not wanting to bear any more punishment. “Sorry! Pat, I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you on Monday.”

The phone slammed down on the dock with far more force than Virgil expected, and he flinched back. Something sticky and wet was suddenly under his hand. Gulping, he looked back and saw melted chocolate all over the silk sheets. Virgil felt lucky that it wasn’t some expired pizza, but it was still not ideal.

With a sigh, Virgil stood up to gather an entire cleaning service worth of supplies.

The doorbell rang at around nine thirty. Virgil had barely made a dent in the mess, and he’d honestly resorted to just throwing everything into garbage bins to burn. Eight of them were full already. Eight.

Virgil opened the door. “Patton! Hey, how are--Patton, please don’t tell me that those are our dresses.”

“Sorry. They are!” Patton smiled unapologetically.

“Dude, I can’t go. End of story.”

“What if I could tell you that you could go to the ball, and the room would be completely clean when you get back?”

Virgil paused, looking quizzically at Patton. “I’d say that you’re amazing, but, Pat, you can’t stay here and clean alone. That wouldn’t be fair to you.”

Patton’s grin widened. “Who said that I was alone?” He stepped out of the way, and three adults came into view. One was tall with purple hair similar to Virgil’s, the next was slightly shorter with a bright orange beanie, and the last was adorably short with colorful hair. “Virgil, meet my cousin’s boyfriend and his friends. They own a cleaning company, and were nice enough to help. Guys, meet Virgil.”

The tall one spoke up, smiling sweetly. “Oh, you’re going to the ball? That’s awesome!”

Virgil nodded as Patton spoke again. “We sure are! Thomas, Joan, and Talyn are going to clean for you. They’re the sweetest, really. Well, they’re super weird, but they’re nice, too.”

The one in the beanie scoffed. “Yeah, as if you aren’t any better! Plus, Thomas is pretty normal.” They nudged the smaller one. “Talyn is pretty weird, though. They don’t really have anything to say otherwise.” Talyn punched Joan on the shoulder in retaliation, but they both laughed.

Virgil smiled as he watched what was happening. As much as it hurt to see such a healthy, family-like dynamic, he was really happy that Patton had such wonderful people in his life. As soon as the bantering died off, he showed the cleaning crew upstairs. Just before he opened the doors to the bedroom, Virgil glanced back. “It’s a mess in there. I’m just warning you now.”

“Oh, that’s alright!” Thomas said. “Our motto is ���there’s no mess that’s too messy!’”

Virgil shrugged and opened the doors. Bins lined the walls, and most of the mountains of dirty clothes still remained. It looked the same--if not worse--as it did when Virgil had started six hours earlier.

“Holy shmokes. That… That’s too messy, Patton.”

“Thomas, you promised!” Patton threw on his best puppy eyes, and Thomas all but groaned in complacency. “Thanks! I love you!” In a flash, he grabbed Virgil’s hand and sprinted out of the bedroom to Virgil’s room in the pool house.

“Geez, Pat, slow down!”

“I can’t! We’ve got to get ready!” The door to Virgil’s room slammed shut behind them, and with shining eyes, Patton held out one of the clothes bags. “Get dressed. We’re going to that ball.”

Part Four

[ao3feed-mchanzo]

Their Damndest

by urgaylol

Hanzo joins Overwatch and McCree is there and they bounce off each other and there's just barely a plot

Words: 8871, Chapters: 1/16, Language: English

Fandoms: Overwatch (Video Game)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: M/M

Characters: Hanzo Shimada, Jesse McCree

Relationships: Jesse McCree/Hanzo Shimada

Additional Tags: a weird amount of political humor, unapologetically pretentious so sorry in advance, Smut, but only at the end, hello children it’s time to talk about utilitarianism, violence and troubling subjects and existential horror, jokes about violence and troubling subjects and existential horror, because that's how I like to talk about things, edgy af but like in a lame way, Dark Humor, bad

from AO3 works tagged 'Jesse McCree/Hanzo Shimada' https://ift.tt/2JAKk31 via IFTTT https://ift.tt/2JAKk31

[kilbygirrl]

What's your favorite things about Roger?

Awww I love this okay here we go

1. first off, his style. The man was so in tune with fashion trends and his whole entire look is to die for. I mean, the fur coats, tiger leopard pants, that one jack he always wore (you know what jacket I’m talking about), the multiple chokers/ necklace...sign me tf up 

2. His sense of humor. He’s so witty and charming in interviews without even trying & he’s also a massive troll when he can’t be assed with lame questions lol

3. His intellect. Roger wasn’t just the bands thot, he’s a very very smart man & I don’t think that gets enough recognition

4. His passion for what he does. After all these he still loves drumming & is passionate about music and other causes such as multiple charities. 

5. How he’s completely unapologetic about being who he is and doesn't give a shit about what others have to say & what a good and loyal friend he is, even to Freddie, years after his death...my heart this man is golden :’)

[britneyshakespeare]

top 5 britney spears songs, top 5 female marvel characters, top 5 movies

i just did 5 britney songs here but since i love my mom i’ll do 5 more i definitely got it in me

don’t go knockin’ on my door GOD IF THIS SONG DOESNT MAKE ME WANNA PUNCH EVERY MAN IN THE FACE and that’s a quality i fuckin love in a song, that’s all i need to say on that

the hook up ANOTHER ONE FROM IN THE ZONE THAT EVERYONE FORGETS ABOUT but it’s so goddamn irresistible, it just jumps from line to line and britney’s voice fits it perfectly, she carries it w exactly the swagger it is due, people give britney shit for her singing voice (which considering she’s naturally an alto and sings in a soprano range most of the time, she really deserves more credit for if you ask me), but it is undeniable she knows how to deliver her lines like an actress, and that’s a damn important quality in a pop diva that gets overlooked in the pop discourse

the beat goes on okay another cover and i named two in the last one, but she does covers really damn well. the way it closes an otherwise quintessentially bubblegum pop album w an avant-garde electropop song is brilliant. it certainly hinted at things to come, pushing borders of contemporary pop music. and it suited baby brit SO well.

perfume i constantly think back on all the missed opportunities of britney jean era, i’m still not over it. it’s been 5 years i really should be but i’m not. but this song really could’ve used better promotion, it’s one of my favorite britney ballads, and one of the few songs in her own discography where she gets to sing in an alto range!!! she sounds GREAT and to her it’s a very personal song and i respect it deeply

coupureélectrique i have nothing to say about this entire album other than that in 2016, y’all were either with us (the loyal gays who supported glory) or against us. this album deserves so much more love like every britney fan cherished it immediately even the fans who were let down by britney jean and afraid to trust again but the rest of the population was just crickets. a shame too she worked w so many talented female songwriters and producers, bc mom understands the importance of uplifting women not just as starlets but behind the scene producing the music being marketed to women. bless. oh and she sings in french which is extremely welcomed.

top 5 female marvel characters:

jennifer walters/she-hulk, i love her so much. she’s so underrated i’m so upset that the mcu has yet to even touch the subject of her, her characterization is so strong and much more interesting than bruce’s if you ask me, she’s hardly the same creature as bruce banner but since she’s a female spin-off character people assume she’s this lame character w poor characterization when ever since john byrne took the action comedy spin on her book w the sensational she-hulk in the 80s, she became marvel’s wisecracking fourth-wall-breaker before deadpool even existed, not to mention she’s unapologetically feminine while wielding masculine powers for which she doesn’t suffer any consequences which is so different not just for female characters in all of fiction but especially in her genre and time of conception. actually. no. lemme use this video to illustrate my thesis bc it does it much more eloquently than i can at this moment blasting britney in my pajamas. but yes, jennifer walters is one of my absolute favorite characters in fiction.

oh i just realized i can do non-superheroes. this is kind of obvious coming from me but *clears throat* mary jane fucking watson. she works as a wonderful complex supporting character and i love how her relationship w peter parker isn’t just rewarded to him but they both go through so much character development alongside each other, but it’s not entirely dependent on each other. she’s such an important piece in just about all good spider-man stories that have come after her inception. i love mj. but i’ve gone off about it many times before.

kamala khan/ms. marvel. a newbie but such a good and relatable and important character, already, especially for someone who didn’t even exist 5 years ago. i love what she means for teenage girls in comics, for muslim/brown representation. i love the cultural references infused into her books, it makes it all feel so much more authentic. i love how human all her supporting characters are. i love g. willow wilson’s sense of humor. but i feel like she’s rightfully acknowledged for being the groundbreaking character she is so i don’t need to write any more on that right now, i don’t think.

jean grey. comics only, i haven’t seen any of the xmen movies, whoops. basically i used to live vicariously through her when i was younger bc she looks like me and telepathy has always been my dream power of all powers, and i love her character history, she’s so complicated for a female character who began as just a simple good girl of the team type of tropey character. i think she’s a prime example of how interesting and convoluted comic book continuity can be and how retcons and arcs seemingly out of nowhere can be done well and how they can add to the characterization of a formerly bland character and benefit the story, how to utilize the underutilized.

dazzler. i don’t think she’s actually one of my favorite female marvel characters but you gotta give major props to a character whose superpowers are literally to be a disco queen. yeah it was very much trend-hopping in the 70s on behalf of the marvel staff but they’ve made it work in some very interesting ways in the year, again i’ll redirect you to a youtube video about her and also this photo

top 5 movies

hmmm i always say the spider-man trilogy (2002-2007), but it’s true and i should say it

i’ve really loved rebel without a cause (1955) since i started my james dean obsession/non-phase when i was in eighth grade. and i really see why a lot about this movie and james dean as a character resonated w me at that age and continues to hit home, i mean, he’s sort of an embodiment of pent up teen angst and feeling misunderstood and out of touch w oneself at the same time, like a walking contradiction. i feel like james dean was one of my first paradoxical role models that i’d continue to build my identity around in my teen years. but i mumble. this really is a great movie w an interesting story to tell, it’s not just coming of age sleeze, it’s really damn well-written, well-acted, and well-directed.

the day gentlemen prefer blondes (1953) fails to make me smile is the day it all ends, man. i’m so attached to that movie, not just because it’s great (though it is), but it’s just one of my comfort movies. i’m always in the mood to watch it. it’s not even the best film marilyn’s in but how can one not love it, you know?

american psycho (2000) is really damn well remembered for a reason. it adapts a difficult and abstract novel with complicated themes and characterization in the best possible way it can, mary herron doesn’t get enough credit for that. bret easton ellis gets his recognition as the author of the book it’s based off of but i don’t think people talk enough about just how well herron pulled it off. the book has chapters spread throughout of just incomprehensible character building in the most skeptical ways, the way patrick always describes what he is wearing in exhausting detail, as well as the wardrobe of every single person around him at all times. the chapters where he just out-of-the-blue gives his reviews of contemporary popular music. his materialism fixation. his unintelligible babbling. patrick bateman’s a character that by all rules of film shouldn’t be able to be adapted to film as well as he is in this movie. i can honestly only think of one or two details from the book i wish weren’t cut, out of such a long and meandering character study of a novel. it’s really, really a gem.

a fool there was (1915) bc theda bara is my original goth gf and she really fucks it up in this film. i love silent horror films so much, especially ones where rich men are corrupted. oh yeah. that’s just a personal niche though. but it is a good film.

ask me for my top 5 anything

[kendrixtermina]

So, “Coco”

One of my sisters was visiting and suggested we watch it

First I wasn’t overly hot on a children’s movie but the point was to do something fun together with my sister and BF, and he likes CGI stuff

My sister pulled out a quick documentary video about “Dia de Los Muertos” and the whole symbolism & aesthetic of it; That’s when I genuinely started thinking that this may have potential... It’s kinda like goth but also the total opposite of goth

The movie delivered. The Aesthetic was top notch, thorough & unapologetic in the music, the cultural references, & the visuals 

In itself it’s very straightforward, archetypical & simple without ever veering into overdone. Very basic fantasy (if taken from a different pool of myth than the usual castles & dragons), classic hero’s journey and a well executed Hegelian Dialectic where the apparent false dichotomy between following your dreams or sticking with your loved ones is crushed in t5he end because, family is supposed to support you & your loved ones can be your greatest inspiration

I kind of called it from the start that Hector was Miguel’s real ancestor (My sister, of course, got the “how” right) - an early hint that he’s a Dad shows up when he suddenly & unexpectedly turns all “reasonable adult-ey” when it turns out Miguel’s family is looking for him. And all along, he just wanted to see his daughter. Awww. 

Lets just aknowledge that the idea of having an epic adventure with your ancestors and meeting all those people your parents and grandparents told you about is just really, really cool; Every family has some branches they know less off than others

Let’s appreciate the Derpy Dog Spirit Guiude with the ludicrous pidgeon wings

It had a neat little political commentary without being ham-fisted and staying within the boundary of “good life lessons for kids”, but there was a certain #MeToo subtext there... like, you can’t put something like molestation in a childrens movie, but the basic point of how your heroes can turn out to have done awful things is prolly a good message to show to little boys, especially with how it didn’t stay a secret in the end but got outed to the world by the old ladies’ words

How deep is it that it’s named for the old granny; Also, how in the epilogue you saw the baby cousin, kinda implying how the family tree/ history continues to grow

When the great-great-grandma sang it sounded just like my mom’s old records

The physical humor with the bones was neato. (as my sister pointed out, there was not a single lame fart joke, the humor was very organic rather than forced or annoying)

So pretty! I mean in the end film is a visual medium. My sister lost it over the look of the afterlife/purgatory place

With trump out there and so much hate mongering, its really good for Latin American kids to see their culture in a cool and awesome light

So, 8/10, but I like to reserve 10 for mindblowing stuff - If 10 is not “best movie imaginable” but “it did everything a [genre] movie is supposed to”, it would be more like 11/10. It’s good that this exists, especially in these times.  

Bonus: Here are some impressions from my littlest sister, an actual grade schooler and hence in the actual target demographic: 

music very catchy

She liked/ found relatable how the MC has a big family just like herself, which isn’t common around here; Same for them speaking Spanish (our parents grew up in Cuba so they speak it at home sometimes)

She thought it had a really cool adventure story (not something that occurred to me)

She went to the cinema 3 times to watch it, and now they’re gonna buy it on amazon, too. The other 2 sisters both stressed how much she loved it

[justiceleaque]

FUCK FINALLY I've been waiting for you to watch Wonder Woman, I L I V E for your reviews.

i watched the film in a subpar environment that consisted of an uncomfortable seat, people talking and using their BRIGHT AS FUCK PHONES JESSICA YOUR PHONE HAS A BRIGHTNESS OPTION, an unfortunate happestance of me sitting next to three tourists who obviously came out here to watch a film to “experience local culture” instead of being DC junkies like yours truly, and finally a broken popcorn machine that could be heard all the way inside the screening because fuck me, i guess

however, all that pales next to my spiritual awakening that happens to one after laying eyes upon diana prince. spoilers do follow

the new DC intro gave me an emotional boner of unknown dimensions. i created my own motherbox from my sheer love for the justice league. i distorted spacetime to such an extreme length, i’m now typing from the fifth dimension, hanging withMcConaughey

they made such an absolutely immense point to make sure the integrity, originality and overall appearance of the amazons was correct. the accents, the emotional strength, the doubts and the defiance in the face of family, the culture you can see from barely any scenes of straightforward interactions in such a way. the unapologetic stance towards who the amazons are and the fact we, the viewers, don’t get a say in shaping them

similarly, young diana,

no that’s it

young diana

i absolutely love how this version of the amazons know every language from man’s land. in many iterations (the most recent one too), diana doesn’t speak or understand english because her studies have been limited to all things concerning anything but man’s world. many times in the comics, the amazons themselves don’t have any knowledge of our language or culture, and those who do, have made sure to hide it. the fact diana speaks every language there is both makes the period of translation/learning quicker (a move that directly benefits the film’s pacing), and it showcases an amazon’s education in a concise but absolutely succesful way

they gave steve trevor a better and more canon characterization than he sometimes gets in the comics. from his goofiness around diana because hearteyes motherfucker, to his sense of duty both when it comes to knowing he can help and when he knows he can’t, to the way he explains just that to diana, how people can and can’t change, that things are never as simple as one bad guy controlling the war

i mean one bad guy was controlling the war but that’s not the point

fuck you, ares

i knew ludendorff wasn’t ares, if i wasn’t aware of the casting already, the fact they pointedly made him constantly appear superhumanly strong was a dead giveaway, so when david thewlis popped up like “sup the world’s lame i have daddy issues lmao”, it wasn’t a surprise… but my god no amount of cgi will ever make his speech and partial fight as nothing but a mortal man more powerful than it did before he went full transformer. the amount of power he exerted just by acting was phenomenal

what a wonderful twist for long-time fans who expected diana’s origins to go one way or another (clay baby or god baby, no inbetween), and getting one version just to have it turned around by the end of the movie. a clever move i wasn’t expecting

I MEAN SHE’S THE GODKILLER? NOT THE COOL AS FUCK SWORD??

this movie’s purpose was to explain why diana has abstained from helping us for so long. why she thinks humanity needs to fuck off for a bit, rethink our lives, maybe not try to start wars every other friday. and it did just that. this diana has rose-colored glasses, thinking everything fits in black and white boxes. ares is bad; humanity is good. ares influences humanity; humanity goes bad. only logical conclusion: humanity can be mended by ending ares. by the end of the film and with the help of steve, she learns things are nothing like that, and even by killing ares, the world isn’t ultimately mended

a++, 10/10 humor and accompanying characters that helped provide the circumstances without forcing it. the entire cast was astonishing

i sure am glad steve trevor is alive :-)

every little detail, from the colors, the way the lasso worked, the animations from diana’s mythology book in the beginning melding reality with art (both ancient greek/roman paintings and comics), to the music that made me want to punch someone from all the adrenaline… what an absolutely fantastic and, above all else, canonical movie. it gives us so many possibilities about diana’s future involvement with the rest of the olympian gods. can’t wait for the upcoming DCEU films

[theavengingmusicjournalist]

EXTRA EXTRA! NOISE IN THE ATTIC IS BACK!

Modern Crowds (interview with Charlie Kupilik)

Together, Charlie Kupilik, Adam Baczkowski, Doug Gatta, and Joseph Pellegrinelli birth Modern Crowds. A local, Jersey Shore indie rock band, who have just released an incredible eponymously titled  record.

Just to quickly recount, Modern Crowd’s band name is inspired by, well, modern crowds.  

Our band name, Modern Crowds, was mainly derived from the current concert going experience. It is very common to see everyone either staring down at their phones, taking selfies, or filming the show rather than living in the moment. This is the modern crowd that many bands and artists have to learn to adapt to, shared Baczkowski in our last interview for Noise in the Attic.

Having their record eponymously titled is, therefore, interesting to me. This record resonates the band living in modern crowds, audiences, as if to say, This is the way it is now. I feel like this record allows me to feel close to all natural things: I feel like I am living in a time where organic processes of creating, of listening, of writing are without the technological realm. And I believe this is why I think of Jack Kerouac when I listen. I feel like he would have enjoyed listening to you on the road. No matter how you feel about Kerouac, each band mate is writing their on the road story.

As young guys in our twenties we all have our personal lives, a lot of ups and downs, learning who are becoming as people, and we feel like that all got put into this record, said 25-year-old Charlie Kupilik of the band.  Kupilik said that this record is like a personal time capsule between the four band mates. He continues to say that creating the record Modern Crowds along side, producer, mixer, and engineer of the record, Paul Ritchie, is something the band will never forget.

With this said, audience members can expect this record to be played stripped down. Not only has the band played some of the songs off of this record the last time they came around, but have been able to practice unplugged versions of the songs at The Asbury Hotel.

Kupilik shares how much it means to play a show which gives back to those suffering from cancer. It makes us feel even better to know we are doing what we love to help out others. We would do this any day of the week if we were asked to help out the way we are on Sunday, said the musician.

As a band, Kupilik, says the adrenaline and the overall great feeling of performing, as well as, watching live shows is what excites the band to do as they do. The Jersey Shore local music scene takes refuge upon the shore together. The playground of Asbury Park makes for countless shows each week and as a result of this, the support each musician and band has for one another is immense.

The bandmate brings up artists amongst the scene that make a difference such as Matt Dubrow, The Mercury Brothers, Avery Mandeville, The Burns, Dead Poet Society, Foes of Fern, The Tide Bends, We’re Ghost Now, Cranston Dean and The Cranston Dean Band (just to name a few). “Just meeting all around good people who give us good honest feedback and tell us how much they enjoy our music is just adding the fuel to the fire to keep us doing this,” shares Kupilik

Music has always been a sanctuary for us, says Kupilik.

Making music takes a lot of time and work. In these modern times, it seems the average, middle class twenty-something year old is set up for failure, or it at least it feels like one must work triple as hard to receive the minimum in return. Nevertheless, the band is a family, they work as both individuals and a group to assure their art reflects their aspirations for quality. Modern Crowd’s new record is an example of their passionate work, and yes, it does show. Hopefully, one day, the big record labels will get off their high horse and see that too.

Kevin Daly

Music to me is community, said 21-year-old Kevin Daly of the Highlands, Its a sense of identity that I never had before. The artist speaks about finding himself through the music he and the people he has met creates.

Imagine a person grasping their voice through the output of sounds, instruments, technologies, lyrics, etc.? one’s own vulnerability starts to become them. It seems for Daly, he has been able to direct the person inside of him to his audience—that’s quite beautiful.

Daly said that it gives him great joy to play for the benefit of the Ashley Lauren Foundation. Both my mother and father have been lucky enough to beat cancer and I’m happy to help fight for a cause that I have such a personal connection with, said the artist.

Having the opportunity to play for the sake of children with cancer and their families, Noise in the Attic will be a place local music lovers should go to see Daly. A lot of his heart shines on that stage. What excites about music is performing. There is something about getting up there and pouring your heart out and leaving everything you have on that stage. It is the most wonderful pleasure on this earth.

With that said, Daly’s hometown, Highlands, is where his inspiration flourishes—a place in his life that takes precedent in his music.

I have always held music near and dear to my heart, and, yes, I would say music is very sacred, says Daly. The musician explains that his music is very personal. He hopes that, as a result of this, people can connect to his craft.

Since music and art is vulnerable, or as Lady Gaga puts it, as though open heart surgery, I sincerely believe that being a performer—an artist—can be brutal in a way. You put your heart and soul into what is your heart and soul, out for the world to see, judge, but more importantly, embrace.

The advice Daly gives to up coming artists is to never give up. I know it sounds lame and corny or whatever, says the musician, “but you have to keep writing and playing. He continues to say that it only takes one song, one person to hear it—that music is a beautiful chain reaction.

The respect local musicians have for the local music community is truly admirable—something unseen in the larger music world of production. Nevertheless, Daly feels the music industry at large should adopt the comradry brought on the local scale. He feels this can come from the support of the artist’s supporters: Regardless of what you play, or what scene you are looking to be a part of, go to your friend’s shows. Support local music. Buy their demo.

Matt Dubrow

When I sit down with an idea I know that the next 10-15 minutes are going to be a creative orgy in my brain, Says Matt Dubrow, 26-year-old local musician from Oceanport, when discussing his excitement for music.

Dubrow is the type of person you smile at on the street and can expect a smile back from. As for his music, he shows that same regard and respect. The musician, who yes, is indeed playing Sunday, Sept. 24, says I resort to music as a means of translating those feelings, and thoughts. Dubrow says that these can often be thoughts and feelings that, if vocalized without music, would turn into a mess of hoopla.

The musician even gives an example, saying that for years he has been feeling that there is a dimension so close that it is beginning to bleed into the dimension he lives in. He continues, saying, that his inner monologues shepard him to places in his mind, that conclusions (I imagine of his thoughts), garner chords, while feelings of resolve, unfold as lyrics.

A song you can expect on Sunday, “Come Around” can exemplify—even clarify—what all these thoughts have manifested into. With that said, be preapared for a good sense of humor—music that, overall, gives the audience a sense of the thoughtful human that is  Dubrow as a musician and human.

Music has always been something I can use to just be sardonic, irreverent, quirky, all the things that made me a weird kid in school can come out and play in my songs, says Dubrow.

The Ashley Lauren Foundation, the foundation Noise in the Attic will be hosting this Sunday, is a federally recognized non-profit organization in Monmouth County. The foundation gives back to children and their families fighting cancer—helping financially to emotionally.

Dubrow describes playing to raise money for this foundation as exciting, but very personal. The musician continues, When you hear a word like “cancer” each human on earth will have a different emotional response, different memories, different tragedies. Since Dubrow acknowledges that everyone has their own personal pains, he shares how this is something he keeps in mind anyway—that everyone is carrying something so very personal, something for which is sacred.

To the Jersey Shore musician, to play Noise in the Attic is to keep that awareness of everyone’s personal difference, and put on a performance that distracts the crowd from anything that is negative.

Unapologetic about his craft, the musician will also take inspiration from anywhere, anyone, and anything. Music, or it seems most artists, gather their inspiraiton from just about all that surrounds them, for as Dubrow says, Sometimes I’ll conceptualize an idea for a song and it won’t manifest ‘til after I’ve helped a friend move out of their apartment and I’m sitting in a chair on the street catching my breath and I pick up a ukulele they hardly keep in tune.

Nevertheless, I have asked Dubrow if his craft has ever defeated him. He says his music only defeats him when his musicianship is not on par with what he is writing. Although the musician would not necessarily call this defeat, he says it’s nothing that doesn’t take a little practice. It seems Dubrow would say this about any human looking to become a musician too.

The musician encourages other musicians to play the music they like. Laugh at yourself for getting the lyrics all fucked up, says Dubrow, Hate yourself for fucking up the G to a D chord. Don’t worry about people around you just wail on the thing. They’re not judging you, they’re jealous.

And if you ever need some recording time, Dubrow will trade you for a little bit of grub!

All interviews done over social media or email

Write ups published as written for each artist

[reincarnatedasacupcake]

art by Stellaarts

Another month has gone by and I am really enjoying this whole summer vacation thing. That being said, I can't wait to go back to school in the fall, but I will take the time to relax and read while I have it. Here's what I read this month:

Long May She Reign

by Rhiannon Thomas

422 Pages (10:30 Hours)

Freya was never meant to be queen. Twenty-third in line to the throne, she never dreamed of a life in the palace, and would much rather research in her laboratory than participate in the intrigues of the court. However, when an extravagant banquet turns deadly and the king and those closest to him are poisoned, Freya suddenly finds herself on the throne. She may have escaped the massacre, but she is far from safe. The nobles don't respect her, her councillors want to control her, and with the mystery of who killed the king still unsolved, she knows that a single mistake could cost her the kingdom-and her life. Freya is determined to survive, and that means uncovering the murderers herself. Until then, she can't trust anyone. Not her advisers. Not the king's dashing and enigmatic illegitimate son. Not even her own father, who always wanted the best for her but also wanted more power for himself. As Freya's enemies close in and her loyalties are tested, she must decide if she is ready to rule and, if so, how far she is willing to go to keep the crown.

This was a lovely book that I truly enjoyed. Only in fantasy can you find an awkward girl who loves science and has severe anxiety who becomes queen simply because she couldn't stand to be social. I love it! As soon as I finished it I went to look for the next book in the series, only to find out that it was a stand alone book! Don't see much of that these days. It's kind of nice that it can stand on it's own, although I would totally read more about this amazing woman trying to do her best to be queen and still be herself.

Soppy

by Philippa Rice

108 Pages

True love isn’t always about the big romantic gestures. 

Sometimes it’s about sympathizing with someone whose tea has gone cold or reading together and sharing a quilt. When two people move in together, it soon becomes apparent that the little things mean an awful lot. The throwaway moments in life become meaningful when you spend them in the company of someone you love. 

SOPPY is Philippa Rice’s collection of comics and illustrations based on real-life moments with her boyfriend. From grocery shopping to silly arguments and snuggling in front of the television, SOPPY captures the universal experience of sharing a life together, and celebrates the beauty of finding romance all around us.

This is a very sweet book and I see a lot of reflection of this love in my real life, which is super nice. It reminds you that love is in the little things and that we all show our love differently. I had always loved when I came across some of these comics online, so I was thrilled when I found the whole collection of them.

The Kitchen House

by Kathleen Grissom

369 Pages

When a white servant girl violates the order of plantation society, she unleashes a tragedy that exposes the worst and best in the people she has come to call her family. Orphaned while onboard ship from Ireland, seven-year-old Lavinia arrives on the steps of a tobacco plantation where she is to live and work with the slaves of the kitchen house. Under the care of Belle, the master's illegitimate daughter, Lavinia becomes deeply bonded to her adopted family, though she is set apart from them by her white skin. 

Eventually, Lavinia is accepted into the world of the big house, where the master is absent and the mistress battles opium addiction. Lavinia finds herself perilously straddling two very different worlds. When she is forced to make a choice, loyalties are brought into question, dangerous truths are laid bare, and lives are put at risk.

A masterfully written book that really hits you in the heart. This was one of my LLB for the year and I'm really glad that I finally decided to pick it up. It's one of those books that discuss race, gender and the terrible treatment of each in the past. For people that loved The Help, The Secret Life of Bees, The Invention Of Wings and other similar books that break our hearts and remind up that we need to do better.

Garnet's Story (The Lone City #1.25)

by Amy Ewing

100 Pages

In The Jewel and The White Rose, we follow Violet in her servitude under the Duchess of the Lake. Now we’ll hear the Duchess’s son, Garnet’s, story in this digital novella—a companion story to the New York Times bestselling Lone City trilogy.

Garnet, the son of the Duchess of the Lake, has always been a spoiled playboy. But now, for the first time, Garnet is beginning to realize the horrors that his family, and the ruling community, have perpetrated. And he just may be ready to do something about it.

Unlike the other short stories for this series, I actually really enjoyed this one. Yes, it is a reiteration of the other book, but is a totally different, unique story. I really enjoyed watching Garnet and the beginning of his transformation. 

Adventure Time Vol. 1 (Adventure Time Volume 1; issues 1-4)

by Ryan North, Braden Lamb & Shelli Paroline

128 Pages

It's ADVENTURE TIME! Join Finn the Human, Jake the Dog, and Princess Bubblegum for all-new adventures through The Land of Ooo.

The totally algebraic adventures of Finn and Jake have come to the comic book page! The Lich, a super-lame, SUPER-SCARY skeleton dude, has returned to the the Land of Ooo, and he’s bent on total destruction! Luckily, Finn and Jake are on the case...but can they succeed against their most destructive foe yet? Featuring fan-favorite characters Marceline the Vampire Queen, Princess Bubblegum, Lumpy Space Princess and the Ice King!

Adventure Time... come on and grab a friend... This was pretty much what you would expect from an Adventure Time comic. I think my favorite part was that they introduced a new princess; desert princess, who is a cupcake who had sand powers. Love it.

It's All Absolutely Fine

by Ruby Elliot

256 Pages

IT'S ALL ABSOLUTELY FINE is a darkly comic, honest and unapologetic illustrated account of the daily struggles with mental health. Ruby Elliot, aka Rubyetc, is the talent behind the hit tumblr account, 'Rubyetc', which has over 220k followers and growing. Taking readers on a journey through the ups and downs of life, the book will encompass everything from anxiety, bipolar disorder and body image to depression and identity, shining a light on very real problems - all framed with Ruby's trademark humour and originality.

Ruby balances mental health with humour, making serious issues accessible - and very funny. With the superb talent to capture the essence of human emotion (and to make you laugh out loud), this book is as important and necessary as it is entertaining. IT'S ALL ABSOLUTELY FINE will include mostly never-before-seen material, both written and illustrated, and will be an empowering book that will make you laugh, make you think, and make things ok.

This is another of those comics that I always loved when I saw online, but wow was this book intense. I wasn't quite expecting that. Her comics can be too real and really hit you when you aren't expecting it and her writing gives you a look into her sometimes gritty reality that she tries to deal with through her humor. That be said, the humor is great, but not something to read to cheer yourself up. I made that mistake.

666 Park Avenue (666 Park Avenue #1)

by Gabriella Pierce

320 Pages (9:28 Hours)

What if your mother-in-law turned out to be an evil, cold-blooded witch . . . literally?

Ever since fabulously wealthy Malcolm Doran walked into her life and swept her off her feet, fledgling architect Jane Boyle has been living a fairy tale. When he proposes with a stunning diamond to seal the deal, Jane can't believe her incredible luck and decides to leave her Paris-based job to make a new start with Malcolm in New York.

But when Malcolm introduces Jane to the esteemed Doran clan, one of Manhattan's most feared and revered families, Jane's fairy tale takes a darker turn. Soon everything she thought she knew about the world—and herself—is upended. Now Jane must struggle with newfound magical abilities and the threat of those who will stop at nothing to get them.

This is the other LLB for the month. Yes, I am trying to catch up, since I am already so far behind with these. I tried to read this book a few times and kept putting it back down in favour of something better. Finally I found a copy of the audiobook on the Library and decided to listen to it instead. MUCH better idea. That being said, it still wasn't a great book. There were so many red flags going on that it was hard not to grimace through most of it. I'm glad it ended like it did, but I'm not going to pick up the next book.

A Wicked Thing (A Wicked Thing #1)

by Rhiannon Thomas

337 Pages (8:42 Hours)

A spinning wheel.

A prick of a finger.

A Terrible curse.

One hundred years after falling asleep, Princess Aurora wakes up to the kiss of a handsome prince and a broken kingdom that has been dreaming of her return. All the books say that she should be living happily ever after. But as Aurora understands all too well, the truth is nothing like the fairy tale.

Her family is long dead. Her "true love" is a kind stranger. And her whole life has been planned out by political foes while she slept. Everyone expects Aurora to marry her betrothed and restore magic and peace to the kingdom before revolution tears it apart. But after a lifetime spent locked in a tower for her own safety, Aurora longs for the freedom to make her own choices. When she meets a handsome rebel, she is tempted to abandon everything for a different kind of life.

As Aurora struggles to make sense of her new world, she begins to fear that the curse has left its mark on her, a fiery and dangerous thing that might be as wicked as the witch who once ensnared her. With her wedding day drawing near, Aurora must make the ultimate decision on how to save her kingdom: marry the prince or run.

A Wicked Thing is a surprising, spellbinding reimagining of what happens after happily ever after.

I enjoyed Long May She Reign (see above) so much, I looked to see what else she had written and came across another series by her that was right up my ally. What? A retelling of Sleeping Beauty after she wakes up waaaay in the future! Yes! Gimme gimme gimme....

I inhaled this book, listening to it as often as I could and finding excuses to have it on in the background. I would've gone right into the second book (yes, this one has a second book!) had I not had a few other audiobooks waiting in my auto-checkout. But I can't wait to get back into it.  

Suffragette: The Battle for Equality

by David Roberts

128 Pages

2018 marks a century since the first women won the vote in the United Kingdom, and Suffragette tells the story of their fight. This is a tale of astounding bravery, ingenuity, and strength. 

David's conversational style is accessible and his artwork full of rich detail, bringing to life the many vivid characters of the Suffragette movement - from the militant activist Rosa May Billinghurst to the world-famous Emmeline Pankhurst. Covering the whole range of suffragette experiences - from aristocrats to the middle and working classes, as well as a look at the global struggle for universal suffrage, Suffragette is a fantastic introduction to a fascinating topic.

This book was really neat; part book and part comic. History always seems to skip over these brave and crazy women that got us the vote and it was really neat to get to know more about them. Wow, some of them were super intense with their methods and suffered awful consequences. The one thing that I was sad about was that the last couple of pages were dedicated to women of colour who had helped in their own countries, but there was almost no acknowledgement of the fact that WOC fought along side these other women and were relegated to the back of the parades and congregations. 

Temporally Out of Order

by Joshua Palmatier & Patricia Bray

294 Pages

It’s frustrating when a gadget stops working. But what if the gadget is working fine, it’s just “temporally” out of order? What would you do if you discovered your cell phone linked you to a different time? Or that your camera took pictures of the past? 

In this collection, seventeen leading science fiction authors share their take on what happens when gadgets run temporally amok. From past to future, humor to horror, there’s something for everyone. 

Join Seanan McGuire, Elektra Hammond, David B. Coe, Chuck Rothman, Faith Hunter, Edmund R. Schubert, Steve Ruskin, Sofie Bird, Laura Resnick, Amy Griswold, Laura Anne Gilman, Susan Jett, Gini Koch, Christopher Barili, Stephen Leigh, Juliet E. McKenna, and Jeremy Sim as they investigate how ordinary objects behaving temporally out of order can change our everyday lives.

I pick up this book because it had a Seanan McGuire story in it and not really realizing that it was a bunch of short stories. As all collections like this, they can be super hard to read. I'm not a huge fan of short stories and I find very few people can tell them well. There were only a few that I really enjoyed and they others ranged from okay to (when will this be over) terrible. The authors I did like I ended up looking up to see if I could find other books by them, so if nothing else, I did find more books to read.

Spell on Wheels, Vol. 1 (Spell on Wheels #1-5)

by Kate Leth, Megan Levens, Marissa Louise, Jen Bartel & Nate Piekos

136 Pages

A road trip story. A magical revenge fantasy. A sisters-over-misters tale of three witches out to get back what was taken fom them.

Andy, Jolene, and Claire aren't your average twenty-somethings. They're legacy witches making their way through a modern world. When a jealous nonmagical ex breaks into their home and steals a spell that could awaken potentials with magical powers, the witches plan their revenge. Traveling down the East Coast, they must retrieve their powerful stolen artifacts and strengthen their friendship... the big bad is even worse than they imagined.

I need more of this. Why isn't there more of this? This comic was so fun and fabulous that I couldn't put it down. I want more stories about these 3 women. I want novels about them; full series of them. Or at least more comics if you please.

Lumberjanes (Lumberjanes #3)

by Noelle Stevenson, Grace Ellis & Brooke A. Allen

27 Pages

The girls have a lot more to worry about than crazy creatures and supernatural events...they have FIELD DAY. It's a competition between the Lumberjanes and the Genteel boy camp next door that's going to be filled with surprises!

I love this gaggle of girls who are ready for crazy adventures. I really wish that these comics had been out when I was younger. It's nice to see. In this volume they come across a secret cave full of magical traps and pit falls and it will take all of them working together to make it through.

A Tangled Web (Five Hundred Kingdoms #5.5)

by Mercedes Lackey

91 Pages

Kidnapping Persephone should have been an easy task. But in the Five Hundred Kingdoms, nothing's ever simple—and the wrong blonde goddess is stolen by mistake, leaving Prince Leopold without his new bride. At least until he braves the realm of the dead to get her back...

I think I've mentioned over the last couple of years that I've been disappointing in the material that Mercedes Lackey has been putting out. But I remembered loving this series of fairy tales turned on their head and couldn't wait to read this short story about Persephone. I shouldn't gotten my hopes up. It wasn't very good. The story takes place on Olympus and in the Underworld, which was interesting, but none of the characters had any life to them. Some of the main characters are secondary characters from the book before, but I can't recall them at all. It spends half the book trying to remind you of their adventures from before (which I am still coming up blank on. 2010 was a long time ago) and doesn't really go into the story that it's in. The only flipping of the story is that these 2 other people are involved in helping and that Persephone knows who Hades actually is from the beginning. 

Henchgirl

by Kristen Gudsnuk

304 Pages

Mary Posa hates her job. She works long hours for little pay, no insurance, and worst of all, no respect. Her co-workers are jerks and her boss doesn't appreciate her. He's also a supervillain. And her parents... well, they're the most famous superhero couple in Crepe City, along with her sister. Cursed with a conscience, Mary would give anything to be something other than a Henchgirl, but no matter what she does her plans always seem to go awry.

This was a really fun comic. Sometimes it's nice to read about the bad guy or his henchpeople. This comic takes a lot of wacky twists and turns that I wasn't expecting and has a great cast of heroes and villains. I also love all the little pop culture Easter-eggs that keep popping up. This is another series that I want more of.

Fraggle Rock: Journey to the Everspring #1

by Kate Leth & Jake Myler

27 Pages

When the water supply of Fraggle Rock mysteriously runs dry, the Fraggles have to journey deep into the caves of Fraggle Rock to find the fabled Everspring where adventure awaits and no Fraggle has gone before! It's the beloved characters of Fraggle Rock in their biggest story yet!

I thought this would be another fun volume to read, but it turned out to only be the first comic. It's very cute and reminded me how much I use to love the Fraggles. I actually had to stop and think about what each of them sounded like so I could get a better sense of them in the comic I wandered around for the next few days with the theme song stuck in my head... and there it is again....

Dance your cares away. Worry's for another day. Let the music play. Down in Fraggle Rock

Antigoddess (Goddess War #1)

by Kendare Blake

333 Pages (10:28 Hours)

Old Gods never die…

Or so Athena thought. But then the feathers started sprouting beneath her skin, invading her lungs like a strange cancer, and Hermes showed up with a fever eating away his flesh. So much for living a quiet eternity in perpetual health.

Desperately seeking the cause of their slow, miserable deaths, Athena and Hermes travel the world, gathering allies and discovering enemies both new and old. Their search leads them to Cassandra—an ordinary girl who was once an extraordinary prophetess, protected and loved by a god. 

These days, Cassandra doesn’t involve herself in the business of gods—in fact, she doesn’t even know they exist. But she could be the key in a war that is only just beginning. 

Because Hera, the queen of the gods, has aligned herself with other of the ancient Olympians, who are killing off rivals in an attempt to prolong their own lives. But these anti-gods have become corrupted in their desperation to survive, horrific caricatures of their former glory. Athena will need every advantage she can get, because immortals don’t just flicker out. 

Every one of them dies in their own way. Some choke on feathers. Others become monsters. All of them rage against their last breath.

The Goddess War is about to begin.

I picked this book up because I really enjoyed Blake's Three Dark Crown series. But the 3rd one isn't out in audio form yet, si I though I would give this one a go. Like a lot of Urban Fantasy, the first book of the series didn't start out very strong. It's not that it was bad, it just seemed to be ramping up. As in setting the stage for the later books. The Olympians were interesting and I loved reading about them, but Cassandra and her posse were down right boring most of the time. Again, I realize that not much can happen until they find her and get her on their team. I will read the next book for sure, hoping that it will follow the trend of always getting better.

The Young Queens (Three Dark Crowns 0.2)

by Kendare Blake

112 Pages

Three black witches, born to a descending queen. One would rise to become queen in her place. Perhaps the strongest of the three. Perhaps the cleverest. Or perhaps it would be the girl born under the best shield of luck.

Katharine, Arsinoe and Mirabella - three young queens born to fulfil their destiny - to fight to the death to win the crown. But before they were poisoner, elemental and naturalist, they were children, sisters and friends . . .

I find it strange that there seems to be a trend of writing these novellas that fir in between other books. I mean, I get it, but I just find that most of them aren't very good and don't really fill my need of them. This was one such book. It was ripe with possibility, but the mark was totally missed. She could've written the entire thing about Arsinoe's attempted escape from the island, but she just skipped over it entirely. I don't get it. It was okay, and I liked reading about the Black Cottage and the old Queen, but the rest fell flat for me. 

Lumberjanes (Lumberjanes #4)

by Noelle Stevenson, Grace Ellis & Brooke A. Allen

27 Pages

After a lot of convincing, the girls are able to agree to get Jen to take them on a hike. Making their way up to the tower and hoping to finally get some answers, they make their way closer only to be stopped by the neighboring boy camp! April, Mal, Molly, Jo, and Ripley have to figure out how to get to the tower, even if they have to use Jen as a distraction to do it.

Another great comic! I still really love this story line. Sadly this was the last comic I had so I have to go out and get the rest so that I can find out what happens next.

The Emperor and I (The Emperor and I #1)

by Mato

147 Pages

One day something emerges from high school girl Kaho’s refrigerator—an emperor penguin, the largest of all penguins! When this emperor joins the household, fun and wacky antics with family and friends ensue!

When I was a little girl, I used to dream about one day having a pet penguin and all the fun things that we would do together. This comic made me long for those dreams again. I've got to admit, I've been looking a little longer and harder into the fridge every time I open it. Can't wait to read more.

Herding Cats (Sarah's Scribbles #3)

by Sarah Andersen

108 Pages

Adjusting to life as a world-famous cartoonist isn't easy. Terrifying deadlines, piles of junk-food wrappers under a glowing computer screen, and an ever-growing horde of pets....umm, never mind--it's pretty much the same.

With characteristic wit and charm, Sarah Andersen's third collection of comics and illustrated personal essays offers a survival guide for frantic modern life: from the importance of avoiding morning people, to Internet troll defense 101, to the not-so-life-changing futility of tidying up. But when all else fails and the world around you is collapsing, make a hot chocolate, count the days until Halloween, and snuggle up next to your furry beacon of hope.

This book wasn't long enough. I loved it so much and I want it to go on forever. This comic always finds the right spot of funny, sad and relatable that I love so much. I hope she puts out more books in the future.  

The Winter Long (October Daye #8)

by Seanan McGuire

358 Pages

For once, it seems like the Kingdom of the Mists has reached a point of, if not perfection, at least relative peace. Queen Arden Windermere is getting settled on her family's throne; no one's going to war with anyone else; it's almost like everything is going to be okay. Even October "Toby" Daye is starting to relax her constant vigilance, allowing herself to think about the future, and what it might entail.

And then Simon Torquill comes back, and everything begins to fall apart. In Faerie, nothing stays buried forever. No matter how much you might want it to.

After 8 books, I finally thought all of my questions would be answered. Turns out only some of them were. I need more answers! I guess I'll just have to keep reading. Good thing I've got the next book sitting on my shelf just waiting for me. As always, it was hard to put this book down at any time. Usually it was because my eyelids were getting too heavy and I kept reading the same paragraph over and over.

Leia, Princess of Alderaan (Journey to Star Wars)

by Claudia Gray

409 Pages (9:53 Hours)

A LONG TIME AGO IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY....THERE WAS A PRINCESS WHO BECAME A LEGEND.

Sixteen-year-old Princess Leia Organa faces the most challenging task of her life so far: proving herself in the areas of body, mind, and heart to be formally named heir to the thrown of Alderaan. She's taking rigorous survival courses, practicing politics, and spearheading relief missions to worlds under Imperial control. But Leia has worries beyond her claim to the crown. Her parents, Breha and Bail, aren't acting like themselves lately; they are distant and preoccupied, seemingly more concerned with throwing dinner parties for their allies in the Senate than they are with their own daughter. Determined to uncover her parents' secrets, Leia starts down an increasingly dangerous path that puts her right under the watchful eye of the Empire. And when Leia discovers what her parents and their allies are planning behind closed doors, she finds herself facing what seems like an impossible choice; dedicate herself to the people of Alderaan--including the make she loves--or the galaxy at large, which is in desperate need of a rebel hero.

I wanted this to be amazing. It wasn't. It was still pretty good though. My main concern with it was that Leia didn't feel like Leia. She didn't have that cockiness and temper that makes her who she is. She felt a little more like a generic fantasy heroine in a Star Wars novel. This book is more about her "coming of age" and felt a little young at times. I loved that Amilyn Holdo (aka the kick-ass purple-haired Vice-Admiral from The Last Jedi) was a character in it and that her and Leia were friends, but at times she felt like she was just Luna Lovegood in a different skin.

Books that I am currently reading

A Fine Balance

by Rohinton Mistry

65 of 603 Pages

Ascent of Women

by Sally Armstrong

150 of 320 Pages

The Forbidden Heir (The Four Arts #2)

by M.J. Scott

 155 of 352 Pages

The Mermaid Chair

by Sue Monk Kidd

50 of 368 Pages

[rachelbrosnahanweb]

New Update has been published on Rachel Brosnahan Web

New Post has been published on http://rachel-brosnahan.org/2018/06/28/press-the-marvelous-mrs-maisel-is-proof-that-the-funny-woman-has-arrived/

Press: 'The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel' is proof that the funny woman has arrived!

Welcome to ‘The Marvelous Mrs Maisel’ hangover club if you have these same symptoms — feeling of restlessness until the show’s return, an inexplicable sense of anticipation over how the beloved Midge Maisel’s life would pan out, and a craving to get tickled over and over again by her on-stage banter — something that she unapologetically borrows from her personal experiences.

Hatched from the brains of Amy Sherman-Palladino and Dan Palladino (the husband-and-wife pair behind the long-running ‘Gilmore Girls’), back in November, Amazon brought to us a refreshing comedy starring Rachel Brosnahan in the lead role. As the vivacious, spirited, and young Mrs. Maisel, the actress instantly grabbed eyeballs and even turned the 1958 setting appear as realistic as possible. Of course, it wasn’t entirely Brosnahan’s doing and a better portion of the credit goes to Mrs. Masiel’s creator as well — regardless, the show found a place in the hearts of its millennial viewers.

So much so, that in the following months, Brosnahan went on to prove that just like her character, she too has a range of hidden talents, beginning with her penchant for comedy. The 27-year-old American actress was later bestowed with a Golden Globe as an acknowledgment of her comic flair — another addition to her numerous skills as previously seen on prestige shows like ‘House of Cards’ and ‘Manhattan’.

The backstory is simple. Brosnahan’s stint as ‘The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’ is impressive. And it’s because the show has a depressingly brilliant charm about it. Set in the late 50s-early 60s New York, the period comedy takes a microscopic look at the women of the era through the eyes of the lead character. Inadvertently, while going through a rough patch in her marriage, our wonderful Mrs. Maisel happens to stumble upon her skills as a stand-up comic.

Had it not been for a night of reckless drinking and wallowing, perhaps the desperate housewife would have never been able to escape the reality of her marriage, which is pretty much on the brink of getting over by the end of the first season. Throughout the first half of the plot, in fact, Miriam (the erstwhile Mrs. Maisel) is driven by one solo need — earn her own living and to that end comedy, surprisingly, comes as a handy tool. But comedy as a performance art is a man’s game and for a Jewish woman, living in a post World War II times, there is not much on offer.

And yet, the ‘Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’ gathers her guts, takes to the stage and her seemingly mindless ramblings end up appealing to the crowd at The Gaslight Cafe. There is something about her self-depreciating rants — a mix of humility and humiliation — that strikes a chord with the audience both in reel and real life. Once on stage, though, Miriam mostly talks about her Mrs. Maisel days.

Just like any talented stand-up, Mrs Maisel boils down her own life issues and troubles into a concentrated form so universal that everyone relates to it.

A lot goes on behind the closed doors of a living room (or kitchen, as some may prefer), that comprise the day to day life of a homemaker, or a mother, or a wife. And the brand of humor that is used in ‘The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’ is practically an ode to all of this, the banter and the usual tete a tete. But what comes as a pleasant surprise to the Miriam-Susie duo is when their stories resonate with the drunk crowd of the dimly-light clubs.

Stand-up for women is a difficult course, to say the least. This is especially true because the act, in its very nature, is contradicting to the ways of feminity and related traditions —everything that Mrs. Maisel’s journey portrays in all its glory. Incidentally, the show’s success — with fans as well as critics — points towards a harsh reality, that this theorem is relevant to the world outside of Mrs. Maisel’s as well.

There is no dearth of funny men in the entertainment industry but the same can’t be said for their female counterparts. Not only are shows with a central, humorous character scarce – or lame like ‘Two Broke Girls’ and an occasional brilliance in the form of a Lorelai Gilmore — but also the existent female stand-up comedy artists (fictional or otherwise) rounds up to a handful.

It is because of these reasons that the struggles and desperations of Mrs. Maisel, in her 50s set world, is still very relevant today, in 2018. Like Amy Schumer would have said that the very act of being a comedian and a woman at the same time is a strong feminist stance since it suggests a “woman’s comedic voice is as valuable as a man’s”.

So, it’s no surprise that Mrs. Maisel’s story resonated with the viewers. And the truth is, it has a lot to do with Sherman-Palladino’s ease of story-telling. Instead of piling the plot with serious and intense outbursts, the daughter of stand-up comedian Don Sherman chooses humor in her work — drawing inspiration from her formative years, having grown up in Southern California with stories of comedians being a regular topic at the dinner table — to deliver even the saddest moments of the leading lady’s journey with a chuckle.

Humor, unsurprisingly, turns out to be a weapon in the hands of this showrunner-actor duo Sherman-Palladino and Brosnahan. Both women. And someone, who had the foresight to predict the growing appetite for comedies centered around characters like Mrs. Maisel, the essentially funny woman.

Source: MEAWW

[turqoiuse]

Me and Earl and the Dying Girl Review

I'm a couple of years late to the craze of “Me and Earl and the Dying Girl” as I was extremely reluctant to pick up this book. Like Earl would say, I didn't want no tears (such a lame attempt. I'm sorry you had to cringe.) Underlying this decision, I realize now, was cowardice so when a friend of mine gifted the book to me it was with great foreboding that I finally made the compromise with myself to pick it up. Which I'm so very glad to have done because “Me and Earl and the Dying Girl” was enjoyably heartfelt. Greg, main character and narrator, was so brutally honest I became conflicted at times, trying to excuse why I would also behave like him even when my first reaction had been to frown at his shocking honesty. But this is precisely what I liked about Greg. He was unapologetically real and sincere, flawed and the maker of dubious and dumb decisions but then I have been too. “Me and Earl and the Dying Girl” is what it says it is. It's not a cancer book but an awkward and humorous yet raw depiction of the other puzzled side of the story I feel I haven't hear of, much less read about. It's about that walking on eggshells sensation and beating around the bush and not wanting to be insensible or screw up when change has spring out of nowhere and then, not knowing what to do from there. With this down, however, I wouldn't say the story is necessarily about reconciling who we are with whom we should be or about coping for that matter. At all. “Me, Earl and The Dying Girl” features Greg who gets roped in by his mom to cheer and befriend Rachel, who has been diagnosed with leukemia. Albeit begrudgingly he follows her orders, but Rachel's condition is new and unfamiliar to him and now he's expected to be a sensible guy which he is not. But this is how we turn out at times in our lives and precisely part of the rawness in this book stems from how honest Greg was. When he learns of Rachel's illness, overpowering sadness is not his response because there is no ground to feel so strongly about. Rachel and Greg weren't friends. Not even people who smiled or nodded at each other at halls in school. Yes, we do feel sympathy and sad whenever we hear about cancer killing young people but what else we truly do? I got Greg. I really did and the extent to which amazed me. I've been in situations where trying to be supportive and understanding, I've felt useless and clumsy. Then, we have Earl who had been dealt a crappy life but whom unlike Greg was more conscious of what was happening, including Rachel, and so made it his duty bringing her joy. Even if it mean lending her the extremely hilarious bad films he and Greg had ever made. I felt greatly for Earl, too. And for Rachel because she was kind and enjoyable company and her end of the deal was such a crappy one. She even told Greg on multiple occasions he didn't have to hang out with her if he didn't want to and it broke my heart. The ending felt well, like an ending (weird, right!). It didn't make promises of uninterrupted happiness but showed how Greg and Earl were going on about their lives. More importantly, kept true to the whole ‘this is not a cancer book’ because it was not the melancholy-charged chapter where how much Rachel had inspired Greg was portrayed. That never happened and in fact Greg's mention of that throughout the book was comical in a sardonic way. Overall, this was a hilarious and real read. I would pay to see Greg Gaines as a stand-up comedian in Las Vegas blindly. He was good. And the crude, raw honesty that enabled a connection with Greg, I adored. 5 out of 5 stars.

[attractionjapan]

Espresso Shot Game: How to beat out 99% of guys in less time

Espresso Shot Game: Making a More Powerful Impression, Faster

  Now, more than ever, women have HUGE amounts of options for sexual partners. She’s likely meeting a LOT of really cool, high-value guys (along with a ton of other guys as well). However, even high-value guys take some time to open up to someone and show that coolness. You can beat those guys out by being a better version of yourself in a shorter period of time.

  So if you’re trying to get her out based on a short interaction, that interaction better be DAMN GOOD. Just like spam mail, people (girls especially) are incredibly good at sifting the signal from the noise. You can probably glance over your inbox in 3 seconds and zero in on every relevant and interesting email. Similarly, you have to command her attention and leave an imprint in her memory that you are an important person within a short period of time, since especially during cold approach, that’s all you get. Luckily, it’s not that hard to have better interactions than most guys. Why?

  99% of guys have LAME interactions that are WATERED DOWN like weak coffee. 

  HOW?

  Most people:

-Have the same “pattern” interactions (Where do you work? / Where are you from? / Why did you come to Japan? / How old are you?)

-Are boring and don’t get REAL

-Play it “safe” (avoid controversy and putting themselves out there until they know the other person)

-Are unsure what they want / how to get it

-Don’t pull the trigger

  People take 3+ dates to hook up because they are hiding behind pretenses (trying to impress/hide their negatives), offering up the “Facebook” facade version of themselves, and as a result it takes 3+ dates to actually find out who the other person really is.  Usually, by the third date we’re comfortable enough with someone that the “realness” of ourselves starts to come out, and we finally drop our guards a little bit enough to finally get a sense of the real truth about the person in front of us. By rooting this behavior out and actively changing it, you can get to know more about the girl in front of you (and she about you) than what takes other guys 3-10x as much time. 

  So most of you who follow me know the emphasis I place on these three things as the CORE of game:

  1.Take Action

2. Honestly and Unapologetically Express Yourself

3. Move the interaction forward

  While these steps might push some women away from you, they clear the air and provide a consistent and masculine message, which will in turn attract the kinds of girls best suited for you, effectively turning your interactions from a watered-down convenience store coffee to a powerful Italian espresso. While not every girl is a coffee drinker, if she is, she’ll LOVE your new manner of expression. Plus, if she ISN’T a coffee drinker, chances are she wouldn’t like your previously Nescafe-ass anyway, even if she does tolerate it longer.

So how can we apply this through the lens of “Espresso Shot Game,” or presenting a more condensed, powerful version of yourself SOONER than others do?

  5 steps to Espresso Shot Game:

  1. Sabotage the “Pattern”

Write down all the most common questions you might ask or be asked. Replace questions you might ask with odd/humorous assumptions (or avoid those topics altogether – chances are, they aren’t that important and can be asked later). Come up with interesting ways to answer or sabotage the boring questions you are always asked.

Do away with mediocre questions, assumptions, and statements. Don’t leave people hanging with dreadfully uninteresting verbal content. Upgrade your questions, make more assumptions, and expose yourself with cutting statements.

  2. Get REAL faster

Stop walking on eggshells, get out there and offend some people. There’s no time for being PC or coddling people. By being more irreverent and blunt, you might scare some people off, but the ones who like you will REALLY like you. Anyway, if you can’t say what you really think, what kind of relationship are you building? Women respect honesty.

  3. Cultivate Congruence

All too many people are unsure of what they want and try to slip in under pretenses. “Let’s be friends,” the nice guy offers, hoping like a dog near the dinner table that scraps of meat will fall to him if he’s simply patient enough and close by. Others pine for women but make no moves, choosing instead to sit next to them in empty subway cars, or lurk near them rather than make an actual approach. Spoiler alert: that’s extremely creepy. Just talk to the girl.

The point here is that ultimately you should have single-minded focus, and your thoughts, words, and actions should all align, giving the woman a clear sense of who you are and what you are about. No waffling about, dilly-dallying, or being wishy-washy. Get in there and make your mark.

  4. Be present

Get out of your head and in the moment. No worrying about “does she like me” or “will it work.” Get in there, focus on self-expression and curiosity in the girl. The less present you are and the more you let your mind run wild, the more you sabotage your interaction. Presence creates spontaneity, fun, and humor. Doubts, fears, and thoughts about anything other than the girl (and where you may want to take her) aren’t important. 

  5. Make the moves

Finally, you have to actually grab yourself by the balls and make the moves. Whether that means actually initiating the conversation, going for the LINE, asking her out on a date, kissing her, or actually having sex with her, you need to make the moves. Once again, it’s far more congruent and less creepy to actually try to kiss the girl rather than just sitting next to her staring at your empty glass or playing another Youtube song. She knows what you’re up to, and the longer you kick the can of manliness down the road the less she’ll respect you.

  The post Espresso Shot Game: How to beat out 99% of guys in less time appeared first on Attraction Japan.

from Attraction Japan http://attractionjapan.com/espresso-shot-game/