#uhm. in love with the reflection of my past self.
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cringetober day 18 (old art redraw). tea tea tea. my favorite child tea <3 i knew i had to redraw one of teas old drawings for this prompt because shes like. the representation of my beginning learning digital art in my mind. if that makes sense. shes also just a resident oldie and has a lot of old ass art to work with! ^-^
old art under cut
this is from fucking 2016!!!! can you believe it.
#[cherry on top]#cw blood#<- just in case <3#oohhhh tea i love youy so much................#teaaaa my babygiiirrrlll my daaarrrliiinggg <- soso obsessed with her own ocs#sorry. tea is just very very dear to my heart i love her oh so very much#she doesnt even have a proper story but im still so obsessed with her. call that#call that narcissus the way i be.#uhm. in love with the reflection of my past self.#is that anything. actually thats nothing i dont know what im saying#sorry i dont know what got over me. i think i havent thought about how much i love her for so long#that it came like pouring out when i started thinking too hard about her </3
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*flops* OMG RINNA THE EVENTR CONGRATS POOKS!!!!!
uhm,,,, i have a bouquet of yellow marquerite (I come soon) nd yellow pansy (i think of you often) i'd like to give to my dearest Riddle..... i was thinking maybe i have neglected my husband for far too long on my travels.
a surprise foretold
Pairing: Riddle Rosehearts x gn!reader
Synopsis: riddle misses you more than he thought possible
Tags: slight angst with happy ending, pining, reunion, domestic fluff, fluff
Word count: 958
Notes: thanks for requesting sakkakuu!!! i hope you enjoy lovesick riddle hehehe
Masterlist
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flowers of choice:
yellow marguerites: i come soon
yellow pansies: i think of you often
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A sigh echoed around the room.
Riddle’s attention drifted, as it often did these past weeks, his gaze fixating on the window with a glimmer of hope. Perhaps, by some stroke of luck, he might catch a glimpse of your silhouette passing by, and he could rush out to envelop you in his arms.
The past month had stretched on like an endless expanse of time, each day dragging on without your presence. Without you, his home felt like a mere shell of its former self, lacking the vibrancy and joy that you brought into every room. Every corner of the house seemed to echo with your absence, amplifying the emptiness that lingered in the air like a palpable presence.
Each morning, Riddle would awaken to the harsh reality of your absence, the cold emptiness of the bed beside him a stark contrast to the warmth he craved. He longed for the gentle touch of your hand to chase away the lingering shadows of loneliness, the comforting stretch of your arms that wrapped around him. But each day dawned with you still far away, leaving him to face the day's challenges alone. Nights were the hardest, the silence unbearable as he lay awake, his gaze forever fixed on the ceiling.
A wry smile tugged at the corners of Riddle's lips as he reflected on the depth of his need for you. It was a realization that both comforted and dismayed him, for how could it be that someone who had been a part of his life for such a relatively short time could leave such an indelible mark on his soul? He couldn't help but feel a pang of self-deprecation at his own vulnerability, acknowledging that he had become somewhat pathetic in his dependence on you. Yet, he couldn't deny the truth of his feelings; he needed you, perhaps more than he cared to admit, and he could only hope that you felt the same.
Then, unexpectedly, the doorbell shattered his train of thought, pulling him out of the depths of his reverie. With cautious hope, Riddle made his way to the door, wondering who could be on the other side. Opening it slowly, he was greeted by the sight of a deliveryman holding a bouquet of yellow flowers, their vibrant hues standing out against the dullness of his surroundings like a beacon of hope.
As he accepted the bouquet, his fingers trembled slightly with anticipation. The note attached to the flowers bore a message that sent his heart soaring.
"For my beloved Riddle, whom I miss dearly. With all my love, your dearest Rose."
Riddle studied the bouquet, his fingers delicately tracing the petals, brimming with gratitude for your thoughtful gesture. As he examined each flower with care, he couldn't help but be overwhelmed by the love and longing conveyed in your message.
Yellow marguerites and yellow pansies.
I come soon. I think of you often.
His heart skipped a beat as he deciphered the message. It was as if your voice echoed in his mind, promising your return.
Then, like a ray of sunlight breaking through the clouds, a sudden realization dawned upon him.
Today was the day. Today, you were coming home
A surge of excitement coursed through his veins, electrifying every fibre of his being. The thought of your imminent return filled him with an overwhelming sense of joy and anticipation. After a month of longing and yearning, you were finally coming back to him.
With a newfound sense of purpose, Riddle moved about the house with a sense of urgency, a flurry of activity as he meticulously tidied up every corner, ensuring that everything was perfect for your long-awaited homecoming. Furniture was rearranged with precision, pillows were fluffed to perfection, and your favourite scented candles were lit, infusing the air with a welcoming fragrance that seemed to linger long after they were lit.
And then, just as he put the finishing touches on his preparations, he heard it—the unmistakable sound of a car pulling into the driveway, followed by the familiar click of the door opening. With swift movements, Riddle quickly adjusted his hair and smoothed down the wrinkles in his clothes, and hurried to the entrance.
And there you were, standing in the doorway, as beautiful as the day he last saw you.
"Riddle!" you exclaimed as you leapt into his arms, your embrace so sudden and full of joy that he had to quickly adjust his stance to catch you. His heart swelled with love as he held you close, savouring the feeling of your warmth against him once again.
"Welcome home, my love," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion, as he pressed a tender kiss to your forehead.
You pulled back from the hug, your eyes sparkling with curiosity as you glanced around the area. "Wait, did you know I was coming home today? How? It was supposed to be a surprise!" you asked, a hint of disbelief in your voice.
Riddle's lips curved into an amused smile as he looked at you fondly. "My rose, you could not have been more obvious," he teased, poking your nose playfully.
Blushing slightly at being caught, you chuckled and shook your head in mock exasperation. "Well, I guess the surprise is ruined then," you admitted with a playful grin.
He gently guided you inside, his hand warm and comforting against yours as he led you towards the living room. "Come, I've prepared some snacks for you," he said, gesturing towards the table set with an array of treats. "Why don't you tell me more about your travels? I've been eagerly awaiting your return, my dear."
Masterlist
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if you liked this post, don't forget to reblog!
#✧2k! blossoming bouquets✦#✧sakkakuu🍄✦#twstnexus#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#disney twisted wonderland#twst imagines#twst wonderland#twst x reader#riddle rosehearts x reader#riddle rosehearts#twisted wonderland riddle#twst riddle rosehearts x reader#twst riddle rosehearts#twst riddle#twst riddle x reader
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A Million Reasons
Summary: after a phone call from Penelope, Reader teases Spencer about a potential love interest and things don’t go exactly as planned.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x gn!reader
Category: fluff with a little angst
TW/CW: a little bit of angst, brief mentions of food, self-doubt, mentions of anxiety, kissing
Word Count: 1.2k
Thank you @drgenius-reid for taking the time to beta-read this!
The following work is my entry for @andiebeaword's 3,000 Follower Celebration Writing Challenge (prompt n. 12) and is also part of the series Spencer Reid, my beloved
Spencer scooped out of the paper cup what was left of his ice cream before he finished recounting the events leading to the arrest of the unsub the entire BAU team had been successfully tracking down in Seattle during the past few days.
“He’ll be charged with ten counts of murder, one attempted murder, and unlawful possession of multiple weapons. He’s facing ten life sentences without parole.”
“Way to go, Justice League!” you cheered, enthusiastic.
He tucked his hair behind his ear with a cute chuckle. His sleeves were rolled up to the elbow so you caught a glimpse of his wristwatch reflecting the light of a lamp post standing along the edge of the walking path; from the bench you were both sitting on you could see the illuminated dome of the US Capitol rising up against the dark mid-summer sky.
Despite being within walking distance of a major street in the southwest quadrant of Washington, the park was quiet and uncrowded and the nearby gelato shop was one of Spencer’s favorites.
You took the last sip of your drink, acting very casual. “And that’s all that happened?”
He shrugged, unsure about which crucial information could have been missing from his story since he was under strict instructions not to fill you in on the most gruesome details of the cases he’d worked.
“Uhm, graphic descriptions of tortures and mutilations are not—”
“I’m talking about a certain homicide detective… the one you gave your number to…?” you explained and his jaw dropped instantly.
“What?!”
You nudged at him with your elbow. “Garcia called me from the Original Starbucks in Pike Place. I couldn’t tell if the hype was about your new admirer or being there.”
“I don't understand how this is such a big deal!” he blurted out in a high-pitched voice. “She showed an interest in what we do so I gave her my card.”
No profiling skills were required to detect his firm intention to avoid discussing the matter, yet the words came out of your mouth like a river in spate.
“Any chance it wasn’t only a professional interest?”
The way Spencer looked at you, disappointed and hurt, hit you worse than a punch in the liver.
“What’s with you, guys?! Are– are you all so invested in my personal life because you’re convinced I’m chronically unable to have one without your help?” he snapped, something you’d never seen him do.
“I’m s—” you tried to reply, even though he was still too angry to let you apologize and cut you off again.
“Or maybe it’s that I’m no Derek Morgan, so why would someone even notice I exist, right?”
“Seriously?! An IQ of 187 and this is the best inference you can come up with?” you snorted, upset by the subtle insult he’d thrown at you - even if you had to admit you deserved it.
His brows furrowed. “Then why did you bring this up?”
“I didn’t mean to pry, I’m sorry. I truly am,” you admitted, “and the Derek Morgan type is not the one I’d go for, just so you know. I don’t think that people hitting on you is funny or weird, it’s… I’m just surprised it doesn’t happen more often. There, I said it.”
He remained silent for a while, quite aware that Penelope’s inability to keep her mouth shut generated from genuine excitement about what she perceived as good news; sharing such personal information with you meant you had been put to the test over and over and, in the end, deemed worthy of her trust.
The peaceful atmosphere around you served as an amplifier for the sound of splashing water and Spencer indicated the fountain at the center of the large, round basin in front of you with a jerk of his head.
“I read a book about the architectural history of D.C. on the way back. This piece was created for the 1876 Centennial International Exhibition in Philadelphia, the US Congress acquired it in 1877 and placed it at the base of Capitol Hill. It was dismantled in 1926, then it remained in storage until 1932 when they moved it here.”
The pedestal held three twin iron-casted sea nymphs wearing wet tunics, with their arms raised above their heads to support a shallow vasque; on top was a group of kneeling child tritons, and the base was decorated with turtle-like aquatic creatures.
“It’s beautiful,” you mumbled.
The fact he’d for sure started and finished said book in less than fifteen minutes was among the 999.999 entries in your list of reasons to crush over SSA Reid. And so were his three PhDs, his crooked ties, his passion for Star Wars, chess and Halloween.
“I don’t talk much about my private life. Especially outside of work,” he confessed after a pause. “A lot of times I have a hard time discussing personal issues—”
“Spencer… you know you don’t owe me an explanation, right?” you rushed to clarify.
He nodded and you did the same in response, to confirm you had no intention of pressuring him into opening up if he felt uncomfortable yet you were also ready to listen to anything he had to say; even in dim light, you could see the sadness veiling his beautiful hazel eyes.
“Garcia was being Garcia, with her ‘look at the world through rose-colored glasses’ scenarios. I gave my card to a homicide detective to discuss behavioral sciences, it was just what it sounds like. But I understand where she’s coming from, I never told her…”
Your whole body tensed up, courtesy of a rush of anxiety triggered by the possibility of him being already involved with someone he had never mentioned, not even to his closest friends; you wondered if he could hear the butterflies fluttering in your stomach.
Luckily for you, Spencer didn’t seem to notice.
“I’m trying to come to terms with something I’ve been feeling, for weeks now. And I’m worried, because of what happened in the past and I can’t let go of…” his voice broke a little, so he swallowed. “Deep down I’m afraid I'm not the type of person who gets to live out happily ever after.”
Refraining from hugging him on the spot and holding him close to your heart had gotten increasingly difficult lately, so you settled for a peck on his temple in a clumsy attempt at a comforting gesture.
You feared the worst when he looked at you for a moment that seemed to last forever; you certainly didn’t expect him to lean forward to cup your face in his hands - big hands. With slender, elegant fingers he tenderly brushed over your cheeks.
You both held your breath, waiting for the distance between you to vanish until your foreheads touched and the tips of your noses rubbed together.
“... are we really doing this?!” he whispered, sending shivers down your spine.
You smiled. “Don’t make me wait for another six months.”
Spencer squinted, an indication he was browsing countless data stored in his memory, then he eventually pinpointed the exact moment you fell for him and squeaked in surprise.
“Christm—”
You pressed your palm on the nape of his neck, guiding his lips over yours for what you both had been longing for.
Reason number 1.000.000: Dr. Reid was one hell of a kisser.
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@thisiscalmanditsdoctorreid, @pretty-boys-book-club, @spookydrreid, @f-me-reid, @foxy-eva, @scorpiofangirl1109, @a-potato-wearing-plaid, @cynbx, @reidsbookclub, @nagemasstuff, @hotchsdharma, @reidmainbitch, @lizzylynch1, @will-grahams-eyes, @padawancat97
»»»— read pinned post for taglist info —«««
#spencer reid fic#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x gn!reader#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds fluff#criminal minds fic#dr spencer reid x reader#friends to lovers#mutual pining#idiots in love#my gifs#milla writes stuff#andies3kwritingcelebration#for the first time i don't hate the title!#fun fact: the setting for this one is a real place in d.c.
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Don't mind me just venting, after reading some JJK x readers and it's also past 1 AM so I am questioning my life pretty much. Pretty angsty, insecure, self confidence lacking vent.
🩵Randomly recommended song🩵
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Being single since the day you were born wasn't so great. Sure, until your late teenage years you thought you might be too young to date anyone. It wouldn't be real love after all. Just the typical young love that middle and high schoolers go through. You know, those relationships which end in a short period of time. However, as proud as you were that you were never included in these things... it was saddening being surrounded by people who were either in a relationship or had one.
You wanted to feel loved, also developed attachment issues, making it harder to make a difference between liking or loving someone, but it wasn't your fault anyways. Even if this issue gave you a hard time, making you desperate to be in a relationship finally, you had a type, you had standards which you never planned giving up on, right? You wanted to be happy with someone who hit these requirements, you weren't asking for much, were you?
Then why are you telling yourself that it is fine if they are not your type at all, they hit a few things you like in someone, that must be enough too, right?
Oh...
Maybe you do ask for a lot, no? After all, who are you to have the audacity to even think of having standards? Huh? Look at yourself...
What do you have to offer?
Have you ever thought of if these kind of people would even love you back? Oh please... Do you really think you hit their standards?
Don't be so self centered, you are not the only one who thinks the way you do.
Now go and lose some weight so you would have the ideal body.
Put some make up on to hide your ugly face, or at least make something else be the center of attention when they look you in the eye.
Have you looked at your nails? They look like you have never ever taken care of them. Maybe some press ons might help that.
I hope you remember that your face isn't the only thing ugly here. What a shame, look at that hip, those thighs and breast covered in white stretch marks. You know those are permanent, right?
Uhm... look at your grades... You can try telling yourself that "those don't reflect your real knowledge", but do you really believe it? You're so stupid. You really think you would have a chance with anyone this way?
Your looks changed so much. Almost looking completely like those annoying girls.
You are one of them, aren't you?
Well, not really. Fortunately.
However, even those kind of people you dislike, your current classmates, your ex-lassmates, even your bullies, one who is also known as your toxic ex-friend, has a partner.
Maybe, just maybe...
...you are the issue.
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Don't misunderstand me, I don't have problem with people who do make up, do their nails or do anything to make themselves feel prettier. Then I was talking about the annoying girl who do these, I meant I hate their personality. Their personality is what's rotten.
LOVE Y'ALL, MWAH!
I just go, continue listening to my vent playlist while crying, no sleep needed this night.
Geto x reader hurt/comfort coming soon, where again, I will just list my insecurities but he comes to the rescue and comforts the reader<33
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-Megan🩵
#jjk angst#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#geto x reader#suguru x reader#geto suguru x reader#suguru geto x reader#geto x reader angst#suguru x reader angst#geto suguru x reader angst#suguru geto x reader angst#nanami x reader#nanami kento x reader#kento x reader#kento nanami x reader#nanami x reader angst#nanami kento x reader angst#kento x reader angst#kento nanami x reader angst#shiu x reader#shiu kong x reader#shiu x reader angst#shiu kong x reader angst#jjk geto suguru#jjk suguru geto#jjk nanami kento#jjk kento nanami#jjk shiu kong#🎀megansbs🎀
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What once was
"Hey, wake up sleepy head, it's 10 in the morning, half the day is lost."
Her voice, soft and sweet, a gentle touch to my ears every time I heard her words resonate in my head.
"Ugh, let me be, woman. My body is aching and I'm still tired."
And there I was, grumpy, wounded, and slowly recovering by her expert hands.
"Oww, did I made my wittle prince angwy?"
She said in a mocking voice, and using a silly tone that in other circumstance, it would've annoyed me. But she made me smile, take her joke, and open my eyes with care.
"Do you know the consequences of interrupting royal slumber?"
She released a chuckle, lowering her index finger to the top of my head, caressing my hair with a warm and sincere smile.
"Uhm...Maybe I'll get my fingers cut! You know, just like you said when we first met, same fingers that seem to help you sleep all nights~"
I felt that weird sensation on my cheeks, flustering, she called it...but it was only an event that happened when I felt close to her, finding every degree of joy, when she calles out all of my bluffs.
"Well, I guess I can forgive your crime if you let me make breakfast this time."
This thoughts of offering myself to serve someone else, they never crossed my mind before, what had changed? What had happened with me?
"Love, you are still injured, it's been more than a year and you have recovered a lot since I found you but, this is indeed a slow-rate healing process. You are not human so I'm not quite sure how much...but I don't want to risk it and-"
I had worst damage done to myself, that was true. From deep cuts, to heavy hits in every inch of my body. It was really a miracle that I was able to walk away in the middle of the forest. But I couldn't stand a single day more being just a patient.
"Hey, Look at me. I can stand on my own, I can climb with no issue, and I can safely sleep besides you. Right now I only have a sore shoulder and maybe just a bit of abdominal pain, but I can walk it off! I promise!"
"I don't know, things in the kitchen might be quite heavy-"
I interrupt her, finally standing up from the pillow I was resting on, her hand taking some distance. And dear gods above...The sight I'm welcomed with, her whole frame resting like a mountain right in front of me, looming with both a powerful stare, and one that reflected compassion, love, and care.
For the past year we had shared our lives, our memories, and even our dreams. It was safe to say that she was my world, my entire universe, the life I wanted.
"Hey, c'mon, I want to do more than grant you a few words everyday, I want you to let me share with you, I desire for you to be treated like a queen..."
I stopped in my tracks, giving a little massage to my throat after saying that, she seemed surprised by the comment as well. But her surprise was a positive one, I could feel it, her emotions, raw in my entire body, a force so strong it made my heart rate increase.
Rules be damned, if I could ever go back to my kingdom, she could rule it alongside me. The first human, and the only one I ever loved.
"Fine, little dummy, but first sign of you being in pain, I'll be taking your cute self back to bed, we have a deal?"
I agreed with a smile, trying to brush off any bit of shyness that I felt expressing my emotions. She carried me delicately between her fingers, no silk was softer than her skin, no sensation was better comfort than to be with her.
And we both enjoyed together what must've been the longest breakfast preparation ever, I had no idea what I was doing, and while she assisted me with the heavy lifting, trying to repeat what I usually saw her doing day after day was complicated. I was making a fool out of myself, and she seemed amused from above at my attempts to make something as simple as a pancake mix.
We both skipped a meal that day, but we were far too distracted to even get bothered by hunger. The kitchen was a mess, and the afternoon set in, I laid sit in the table, and she rested her head on it, she wanted to have a good look at me, she really...liked me. The little cursed thing that I am.
After our laughs came to a cease, we both just stared at each other, time getting slower, my mind just getting more and more distracted on those beautiful gems she had for eyes. I had to say something before I started looking like an hypnotized idiot.
"I don't know how you get the patience to deal with this disaster you call boyfriend."
She held me closer to her, a palm working as a wall that pushed me near her face, a warm sensation washed over me.
"You are not a disaster, Morgan. Maybe you were a little shit once, but the man I see now is the sweetest person I've ever known, someone who, against all my wishes of making you rest, keeps pushing forward to make me smile, surprise me with literal magic! And securing I have the best dreams every single night. I love you, and I chose you. So don't say nasty things about yourself ever again, my King."
"I promise, never again, my Queen."
With my surrender regarding her comment, something else I feel the need to say. All the bad things done, my sins and crimes as royalty, the real reason I was found with my curses. I wanted her to know who I was before crashing in her life, to know the truth. Even the dangers that could've been done by my hand before.
But before I could release a word, a kiss came to me with no hesitation, darkness trapped me between her lips and the palm of her hand. But a sudden sensation of coldness made itself present. She wasn't there anymore.
"Sweetheart?"
My breathing accelerated, I entered in panic looking around for her.
"Love!?"
In a blink, I was no longer in her old cottage, back at our forest, enjoying a regular afternoon together. I was alone, resting on the floor of an abandoned building. With an empty potion bottle of growth laying at my side, police sirens as background noise.
"Right, not dreams, just memories..."
I said to myself, tired, checking on my old cellphone what new contract was there for me to grab.
#g/t scenario#g/t#gt community#giant/tiny#g/t writing#gt writing#g/t ocs#g/t sona lore#g/t sona#g/t fluff
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I absolutely adore your phantom thief kikuno!!! I'd love to hear more about it, anything you want to share :] (especially the persona I really love the design 👉👈)
uhm well uhm hiiii 😊 THANK U hiii i love being the talker. got a lot to say so it’ll go under da cut
being really frank a lot of it is a heavy wip but the concepts in my brain were clear enough that i wanted to start drawing for it right away. it’s very loose structurally
it’s essentially me pulling shit from the drama cds to do something ultra self indulgent.
she becomes a phantom thief kinda late in the game as my hypothetical palace concept that would get her involved with the thieves in the first place is one that has to do with the kirijo group, placing it just after haru joins the thieves on the timeline; this follows the implicit canon timeline where p5 takes place sometime after p4au. the kirijo group announces it is taking a different direction that has bad consequences and the thieves gotta Stop It (still trying to work the specifics of this out) and they initially think they’ll be happening upon a palace belonging to mitsuru.
surprise, it’s not mitsuru, its takadera (for those who might not recall, he’s the one-off antagonist character in the drama cd kikuno is introduced in, who attempted to take control of the group while mitsuru was grieving) who is back with a vengeance and has something planned that corners mitsuru into working with his demands. they don’t figure out as much until they find him in the palace since he’s not acting as a public figure at the time.
amidst their snooping, ever-observant kikuno catches sight of the thieves and tails them, which of course leads her straight into the metaverse as they get their hits on the new palace that’s sprung up.
kikuno adjusts almost immediately to the absurdity of the situation because it feels just like the dark hour, which she’d experienced nightly for 6 years of her life up until the dark hour disappeared. the metaverse comes off to her as essentially that with a few extra quirks, which isn’t accurate to anyone but herself. upon coming face to face with shadow takadera, much like many of the past thieves, his spiteful raw feelings, especially in reference to mitsuru, trigger kikuno’s awakening.
she takes it like a champ, she’s expected for a long time to eventually awaken, even if after 10 or so years going without one and getting by on her prowess alone had her convinced it might never need to happen. she slots easily into at least temporarily aiding the thieves. kikuno by now has mellowed out a reasonable amount and become more of an individual, but her loyalties haven’t changed. she’ll do anything in the name of protecting her lady, and the shadow operatives by extension.
with the bulk of the lore happenings out of the way, ill leave bullet points for the other stuff
when initially asked what arcana i would assign to kikuno if she were a social link in p3, i proposed hermit because i felt that it well-encapsulated her at the time in her life it would have played out. but for this particular au where she has grown considerably, I think justice would suit her somewhat better.
for designing pierrot i felt something reflecting her role as a personal servant but with a touch of like…jester/clown vibes would be fun, just because i feel it reflects her personality well.
reginald is of course based on reginald jeeves, the quintessential butler character originating from pg wodehouse’s early 1900s literary works. maybe not the perfect choice for a ‘rebellious’ figure, but i couldn’t glean a better fit from my searches, and as soon as i did a little reading i had a very clear image in my head for the persona design and had to go with it. i used inspo from various depictions (the bowler hat and tie in particular), as well as just what Felt Right (the bushy brows and monocle)
i have to do a lot of the work in the way of designing a palace for takadera (hell i have to design takadera in general because he was never given an actual design LOL) but my singular important thought is that there’s a cognitive mitsuru who’s still a child running around, because takadera never stopped viewing her as too immature. kikuno is very protective of her even knowing she’s personified through takaderas mind and spends much of the palace trying to keep her out of the grasp of the shadows.
pierrot is a bit of a silly goofster but with great capacity to be ruthless. this is good enrichment for her because there are a handful of moments in canon that lead me to believe she wants to commit unspeakable violence.
as a member of the thieves despite being in her 20s and the oldest member she doesn’t step out of line Too often but as with anything, if she finds that there is a more beneficial method to something than playing it safe, she’ll go off and decide to do it on her own. unfortunately when it comes to the metaverse, this isn’t always the best option so she’s probably gotten the thieves into hot water before as a result. but she promises to take more heed next time, joker-san. her sincerest apologies.
this is Most of what i have ironed out so far. id like to think more about her dynamics with the individual thieves, as that’s the fun part. thanks for showing so much interest though :]!!
#p4au#p3#p5#phantom thief kikuno au#quinn moment#princekirijo#asks#tysm for showing interest im craaaazy
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(you do write, so you are a writer-writer, and a fantastic one even♡)
ok so for the ask game: 🥺🎢🛒💖🦅🤭🧠(annie) and ✨️
Thank you so, so much, both for asking and for your words T___T
🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?
Oh, yes. This is THAT moment when one character is in danger and another one just is so lost in emotions and feelings. It works for me both in canon and in my writing. I think, that situations like these open up what REALLY a character feels and thinks because this is the question of life and death.
🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?
It's definitely "Bury Me in the Shadows of Spring" because the plot here is emotional damage ™. It's so dense with feelings, so sometimes when I reread my plot outline, I feel like my heart is broken.
🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.
I already answered it here, so I'm just referring to this answer :)
💖 What made you start writing?
Oh… I guess, my love for literature in general. I wrote some "original" stuff a long time ago when I was 11–15 years old, and I was really engaged in the process, of how the only power of words building the whole world! Then, I even wrote a whole "original" story when I was 18, it has like…~200k words? (I never published it and never will). It has two parallel plot-lines, one is the diary that describes the events of the past, and the second one is the present. Two lines collide when the "present" one finds the diary, and the mystery of their world becomes larger and larger, heh. The diary line due to some event has no stars and the "endless" night, so it has a lot of reference to the constellations and stars. It's actually called "Through the corridors of stars" (yeah, I love pathetic titles...) But after that, I didn't write anything. When I opened the world of fan fiction back in 2020, all these years I had a will to start writing again, but this time publish it. It took me 2,5 years to overcome the fear and the stupid uncertainty to start writing in English, so here I am!
🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?
Oh, always outline! Before starting BMSS I wrote a whole separate doc with each chapter and key events. Also, I marked some specific details for the chapter structure as Annie's chapters are colorful, it always has a lot of references to the art itself + the title of her chapters is the actual painting title, and the whole chapter in Annie's POV is built around this canvas. In Armin's we have a more lyrical, wordy style, he has more inner reflections. Their mutual POVs chapters have their titles mixed, and so are the styles of their narration :)
As for one-shot, it goes the same way. Key points, some key topics (as I like to choose a few leading topics and to look at them from different angles and POVs).
🤭 Do you have a favorite tag to use when posting your works?
(Author hates it)
This is, the tag. Describes me very well :DDD
🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them. (Annie)
I always agree about Annie being the one who is struggling to show her feelings properly, but for the same reason, I find her the one who can be incredibly soft once she is certain nobody would hurt her. And also I feel like she is emotionally deprived, so once she learned not only to be the receiver of attention and affection, but also a giver…oh my, this girl will shower you with all these adorable things, but SMALL once, It's not big romantic dates, but mundane and ORDINARY things that, maybe, are even more precious.
✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉
My limit on self compliments is already dead with this answer, but…uhm, Ann, please, calm down and enjoy the process. You're doing great and something that you wanted for so long, be proud of yourself, goddammit :D
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Living as an Extra in an Omegaverse novel
Side story Chapter 20
Shin Tae-oh rested his head on his leg and stroked the heads of the sleeping Se-hyeon. The only thing the two did when they came up to the attic was talk, but perhaps because he got tired quickly, Se-hyeon slept well even on the bare floor.
“Well, Se-hyeon did a lot of things today.”
He drove all the way here himself, and stayed by Shin Tae-oh's side the whole time even when he was drunk. And considering that he had been waiting for an opportunity to propose, he was sure to be tired.
“The ring will be given at the wedding hall.”
Although he said he didn't give him a ring on purpose, the person speaking had a more expectant look in his eyes. Until I had a baby, I was hesitant about the topic of marriage. Now it seemed like he too was accepting it.
It could be that he was doing it reluctantly, but looking at Se-hyeon's recent appearance, it didn't seem like that was the case.
Se-hyeon took each step step by step without skipping a single thing. This goes beyond his meticulous personality and reflects his desire to not neglect anything.
“Why do you always fall in love with people?”
Shin Tae-oh looked at the board again.
- The left side of his face looks better. It would be good to have Shin Tae-oh sit on the left during the interview.
- Always wear a navy blue suit for important contracts!
- Why do you wear your coat collar up like this…
I also collected a lot of press releases from SR Construction, but what caught my eye was the place where Shin Tae-oh's personal information was written. When he was working, he had a face so hard that not even a needle could go through it, but what did he think of himself on the inside?
“Se-hyeon, don’t I look pretty with my coat collar up?”
“Uhm...”
As Shin Tae-oh spoke, Se-hyeon squinted his eyes and pursed his lips.
“Are you lying on my left side so you can see the left side of my face?”
Shin Tae-oh continued to talk to Se-hyeon, who was still asleep. Even though Se-hyeon couldn't hear anything, Shin Tae-oh didn't stop.
“I didn’t even know that, I thought there would be no one for me in my life.”
I couldn't believe that I was only paying attention to other people without even knowing that there was someone there just for me. Se-hyeon stood next to him and silently received a gift for someone else and gave it to him. Every time I thought about that past, Se-hyeon felt shameless.
Shin Tae-oh sighed out of self-destruction that he had not yet shaken off, and then inadvertently discovered something. It was a memo pad hidden behind a board.
Shin Tae-oh reached out his hand to pick it up but stopped. My hand barely touched the pad. However, Se-hyeon's leg was cut to make it difficult for him to lift his body any further. I couldn't get up because I was afraid Se-hyeon would wake up.
Shin Tae-oh, who was in a difficult situation for one reason or another, looked at the pad wistfully.
Should I give up?
Then I can stay still so that Se-hyeon can sleep soundly again. But once you become curious about people, you start to want to see them.
I couldn't fold it like that.
Shin Tae-oh was biting his lip and thinking about what to do, but when Se-hyeon moved in his sleep, he quickly pulled out his legs and cupped his face with his hands. For a moment, Shin Tae-oh sighed in relief when he saw that Se-hyeon was not awake.
While wondering what he was doing, Shin Tae-oh used his slightly longer body length to grab the pad.
There were many books scattered around the board, but Shin Tae-oh didn't know why he needed to look at this memo. It was just a feeling.
Shin Tae-oh picked up the pad. It was yellow paper with lines drawn on it, so you could write on it whenever you needed and tear it up as much as you wanted. Shin Tae-oh had seen Se-hyeon carry this memo pad in his arms a few times, between his folders. Se-hyeon uses his cell phone the most, but he sometimes writes things down by hand.
To that extent, Se-hyeon also wrote in bold letters…
-Please use common sense for this reason.
-Oh, that same excuse again.
-I won't receive a gift...
...Is it mine?
-Taenyang... Do you have any intention of dating?
-You really like it, right?
"Haha."
I laughed because I thought I knew when the note was written. At that time, he always seemed to get things done quickly and without a trace of laughter, and I was thinking this.
Shin Tae-oh shook off his laughter and looked at the last phrase again.
-You really like it, right?
Se-hyeon had already felt what he realized too late.
So when he said he had a crush on Se-hyeon, it was natural that he thought it was a joke. I knew it back then, but now that I know Se-hyeon's inner thoughts, I can see that he didn't trust Shin Tae-oh even more.
“And yet you treated me well.”
He didn't accept it from the beginning, but it wasn't a harsh rejection.
"Ha."
Shin Tae-oh buried his face in the pad.
“Really, Ahn Se-hyeon, why is he so lovely?”
It's really crazy good.
***
Se-hyeon felt the hard floor against his back and realized that he had fallen asleep in the attic. Should I have closed my eyes with Shin Tae-oh when he slept? Still, it wasn't cold because his mother turned on the boiler.
Because I'm not alone anymore. Because I have honey rice cake, I pay more attention to it.
“Shin Tae-oh.”
Se-hyeon got up and looked for Shin Tae-oh. I wondered if he went down alone.
“I’m here.”
Se-hyeon turned to look at him at the sound of a voice coming from right next to him and pulled his body back in surprise.
“What’s wrong with your face?”
“What’s wrong with my face?”
Shin Tae-oh stroked his cheek and tried to shake his head to say he didn't know, but he flinched and bit his lip tightly.
"Are you sick?"
I thought it was strange that Shin Tae-oh's face was pale, but he couldn't hide it all and made a painful expression. Se-hyeon quickly grabbed his shoulder and checked his condition. The veins on Shin Tae-oh's face are so bad that they stand out. What is that big of a deal?
"...Lee."
"Yes?"
"Leg…”
Se-hyeon looked at Shin Tae-o's legs as the words flowed out of his mouth. It's stretched out somewhat to one side, but I don't know what's strange...
“It’s numb because the blood isn’t flowing.”
"Ah."
After hearing the reason why Shin Tae-oh was in pain, Se-hyeon belatedly remembered one fact. I slept on the bare floor, but where was my head?
"It hurts a lot?"
Shin Tae-oh shook his head as Se-hyeon said as he stretched his hand towards his leg.
“Don’t touch it.”
Shin Tae-oh was shocked and stopped Se-hyeon. As if he would never be able to stand still no matter how much he loved Se-hyeon if he touched him now, Shin Tae-oh begged Se-hyeon not to touch him with as much sincerity as when he confessed that he loved her.
Of course, Se-hyeon, who was so worried about Shin Tae-oh, could not ignore his plea.
Suddenly.
“Off.”
Hearing Shin Tae-oh's moans as if all the air was gone, Se-hyeon massaged his legs with even more strength.
“If you touch me like this, the blood will flow faster!”
“Oh, no.”
“It’s better than leaving it alone, right? Trust me.”
“...”
Shin Tae-oh seemed to be speechless anymore, with his mouth open and a very distressed expression on his face. Even my face, which had been gray, began to lose color quickly, perhaps because the blood was not flowing through it. As I was looking at Shin Tae-oh's blushing face, I enjoyed seeing it as it was.
How pitiful it was to not be able to struggle in the meantime.
Should we stop joking around at this point? I got numb because I gave up my leg to be my pillow, but I can't keep torturing him.
“Now, answer me now. Who is it, me or Kkultteok?”
"That…”
Se-hyeon kindly gave Shin Tae-oh a chance to let go. When Se-hyeon looked at him with expectant eyes, Shin Tae-oh closed his eyes tightly.
“I’d rather endure it.”
“...”
It would be better for him to choose me over the honey rice cake that hasn't even been born yet, but he is stubborn.
“You really can’t choose?”
Se-hyeon climbed up onto Shin Tae-oh's legs and sat down.
"Ah."
At this level, everything should be resolved. No matter how long he endured, Shin Tae-oh has not yet escaped the pain. However, he stubbornly persisted, and even Se-hyeon was amazed.
“Kkultteok... could resemble Se-hyeon.”
“...”
“So you can’t choose.”
Shin Tae-oh shook his head and said that he could never like anyone more. Se-hyeon saw that and tilted his head to one side.
“What if they look like Shin Tae-oh?”
“I’m not going to think about that.”
Shin Tae-oh went beyond his choice and just showed his desire for a honey rice cake that looked like Se-hyeon.
He's a human being who puts pain over something that doesn't really matter.
Se-hyeon came down from Shin Tae-oh's leg as if he had accepted him. It's definitely not because I see him getting better. Never.
“Now go down.”
He had to check how long he had been in the attic. If it was still early, he thought it would be better to go to bed and sleep.
Now that I think about it, I don't know if Shin Tae-oh was sleeping with me while I was sleeping. I drank so much and didn't sleep for a few hours.
Se-hyeon moved his body first and opened the attic door.
“I like the honey rice cake that looks like Shin Tae-oh better.”
Just like that, Se-hyeon gave Shin Tae-oh an answer he didn't even ask and went down with a grin.
“A honey rice cake that looks like me? Then what about you?"
Shin Tae-oh, who belatedly recovered from his shock, followed Se-hyeon down and asked.
“Kkultteok hasn’t been born yet. So, I…”
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Acts of Kindness - Valentine's Day - Intern Year
Book: Open Heart (Book 1)
Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Kaycee MacClennan)
Rating: Teen
Category: Fluff with a tiny bit of angst
Summary: Valentine’s Day has long been one of Kaycee's favorite holidays, and this year she found a cupid accomplice in her fellow dolphin, Sienna. They manage to ruffle a few feathers as they try to spread cheer around Edenbrook, but can Kaycee's kindness chisel away at the most guarded of hearts?
Words: 2500
A/N: This one was a challenge. I wanted this to be part of my HC for Ethan & Kaycee, so it needed to reflect several things. Kaycee's determination to remain her bright, positive self; the pining that still remained between them (post-Miami); Ethan's resolve to stay away from her; the hospital staff noticing all of it; HER SELF-RESPECT (something PB often left out); and how much he second-guessed his choices. On top of that, I wanted her friends to play a role. I don’t know if I pulled it off in 2500 words, but I tried. Happy Valentine’s Day!
A/N 2: Participating in @choicesfebruary2022challenge - Day 24, Cupcake
A/N 3: Participating in @choicesmonthlychallenge To be or not to be... this is still a 💔 not to be (its book 1, people lol)
CHARACTERS BELONG TO PIXELBERRY STUDIOS
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b3e7f3b5e20eaeaf54d87a0fa5c1ed93/8d1f14b8c593abdf-a2/s500x750/e0caf181c0230becf5c07ac8bc2a7b7b79779eee.jpg)
“Sienna, do you have the cupcakes?”
“I’m boxing them up now,” she yelled in from the kitchen.
“Well, hurry! Our Uber only has to wait five minutes for us, and if they leave, we’re screwed.”
Jackie stood by the doorway, her arms crossed and shaking her head in bewilderment.
“I can not believe that you two are bringing so much crap to work that you have to take an Uber.”
“Jackie,” Kaycee grinned. “It’s Valentine’s Day! Everyone should feel loved today, and that's our mission.”
“Oh, they should feel loved today," Jackie smirked. "What about the other 364 days of the year? Do they count? Or only the one Hallmark tells us we should feel loved on?”
“Of course, every day counts, Jackie! But it’s like a birthday; everyone should feel just a little more special today. For example,” Kaycee slid the aluminum foil off the top of a container she was carrying and pulled out a heart-shaped chocolate chip cookie. “Here!" She placed the cookie in Jackie's hand and a peck on her cheek. "Happy Valentine’s Day!”
Jackie brusquely wiped off her cheek in protest. “Seriously, MacTavish, that’s supposed to make me feel special.”
“Just eat the cookie, Jackie. Then we’ll talk about it,” she winked.
“Less chatting, more running!” Sienna interrupted as she hurried past them. “Now we're really in danger of the Uber leaving.”
“Don't worry!" Kaycee assured. "I’m right behind you!”
"And uhm, save me one of those cookies!" Jackie yelled after them. "What? They're good!"
_____
Bryce and Raf were waiting for them when they arrived at the hospital. Lahela shook his head when he saw the large haul.
“Thanks so much, guys! I don’t think we would have been able to get this all upstairs without your help.”
“How the heck did you two manage to bring this down from your apartment alone?” Bryce asked.
“I’m sure Jackie helped them,” Raf replied.
Kaycee couldn't contain her burst of laughter. “Jackie? Help? You’re funny!” She turned back to Bryce, “It was quite comical. If there were video, I am sure you’d be amused.”
“Hey, I’m not beneath bribing your doorman to get my hands on the security tape. Here, give me that bag.”
All four of them were loaded down. Heart-shaped cookies, elaborately decorated cupcakes, red sugar-free Jello hearts, tons of cards, decorations, stickers… it seemed like they didn’t miss a thing. Inez was in amazement as they walked down the hall. While Zaid muttered something about stupid and Hallmark under his breath before walking away.
“I can’t believe you guys are doing all this!” Inez gushed, “This is going to make everyone feel so special!”
“That’s the goal!” Sienna beamed.
“What, no flowers?” Zaid smirked from across the way.
“No, silly!” Inez responded. “That would compete with the nurse’s annual roses sale! This year the money is going toward pediatric cancer research.”
“A great cause!” Kaycee beamed. "Zaid, I fully expect you to purchase each of your residents a rose today.”
“Ha!” he chortled, “Sure, that’s as likely to happen as an autographed photo of me in my Valentine’s Day jammies. Not happening, MacClennan. Now, finish up. I did not receive word that you’ve resigned to replace Cupid, so according to my schedule, you still have real work to do.”
“He really needs to get laid,” Bryce whispered as Sienna concealed a laugh.
“He just hates holidays," Inez assured. "All of them, really, but this one in particular.”
“That’s too bad,” Kaycee sighed. “I’ve always loved Valentine’s Day.”
Laura, a nurse whose crush on Dr. Ramsey was as strong as her dislike of Kaycee, smirked over her shoulder. “Really?” she sneered, “Even when you don’t have a boyfriend and have to spend it alone?”
“Sure! I don’t need a boyfriend, or a girlfriend, to enjoy Valentine’s Day. It’s about all kinds of love, and I am lucky enough to be surrounded by plenty.”
Sienna gave her friend a side hug just as Ethan approached the nurse's station. His eyes were like stone, and there was a noticeable change in Kaycee's demeanor as he approached.
“What’s all this?” He asked without moving his eyes up from the paperwork in his hands.
Sienna looked worriedly between him and Kaycee, then back again. When it was clear her friend was not going to answer, Sienna jumped in.
“These are just some treats and trinkets we made… for the patients and the staff. We want everyone to feel special today.”
Ethan rolled his eyes dramatically. “And what makes today different than any other day of the year?”
“Uh, it’s Valentine’s Day,” Sienna simpered.
“Well, I don’t believe in such nonsense,” he muttered and hurried away.
“What a freaking shock,” Kaycee muttered, a little louder than she had hoped. Everyone except her scattered, and you could hear a pin drop when Ethan turned on his heel, his icy gaze fixed upon her.
“Excuse me, Dr. MacClennan. Do you have something to say?”
She looked so uncomfortable even Laura appeared to take a small amount of pity on her... for a moment anyway.
“Yes. I do. Frankly, I’m disappointed in your response. Studies have confirmed time and again that when patients feel they are receiving attention and feel cared for, they respond better to treatment, heal faster, and experience more positive outcomes. Surely you can’t object to Dr. Trihn and I wanting to lift their spirits now, can you?”
Onlookers' jaws went slack, but none could divert their eyes from the spectacle. It was like watching the scene of an accident, but the crash had yet to occur. Dr. MacClennan always spoke to Dr. Ramsey more directly than any intern that came before her, and all took notice. But this was a step beyond, even for her. The muscles in his reddened cheeks were taught and his lips pursed. Everyone braced for the outburst that was about to come, but it never took place.
“I suppose you have a point since most people buy into this absurd holiday. Carry on, MacClennan... Trinh.”
If jaws were slack before, they reached the floor now. The hush that had overtaken the station was replaced with whispers and stares.
“He has got to be banging her,” a night nurse loud enough for most to hear.
“He is not!” Laura protested angrily.
“I’m with Laura,” Sarah added, “If he were banging her, he wouldn’t have been so mean to her in the first place.”
Sienna was turning red, desperately wanting to defend her friend. This wasn’t the first time this had happened, and it likely wouldn’t be the last. But Kaycee had asked everyone to just ignore it, it would be better in the end.
“Don’t you have anything better to do,” Maureen admonished. “This is the last time I want to hear this idle gossip, do you understand? You’re supposed to be professionals!”
Her eyes flicked over to Sienna and then to Kaycee, who smiled with gratitude.
Sienna looked up with sad eyes. “I’m sorry you had to hear that.”
“It is what it is, Sienna. But I assure you, I’m not sleeping with him.”
“I didn’t think you were.”
“Good,” Kaycee chirped. "Now, come on, let's go spread some cheer before our rounds begin.”
For the remainder of the day, the two doctors spent their breaks and downtime bringing their treats from room to room. Ms. Gernstein’s room was one of the last Kaycee visited before her shift ended.
“Mrs. Gernstein,” she grinned.
“It’s Clara, Dr. MacClennan. How many times must I tell you.”
“Well, that’s fine, but then I insist, I’m Kaycee.”
“I suppose I could do that,” the old woman agreed. “What are you doing here? You already stopped in before?”
“Oh, that was work; this is social." She handed Clara Jello-heart wrapped in colorful cellophane paper.
“What is this?”
“It's just a little treat for Valentine’s Day.”
Unbeknownst to Kaycee, Ethan was passing by the door, and he stopped when he heard her voice.
“But I can’t have sugar.”
“I know, Mrs. Gern… uh… Clara. That’s why it’s sugar-free.”
“That's too kind,” she gushed, taking Kaycee's hand. “You know, this is the first Valentine I've received in almost fourteen years.”
“Really?”
“Yes, not since my Harry passed away. He always made such a fuss, even though I told him not to.”
“Well, I’m glad I broke that trend. Everyone should get a Valentine." She pulled up a chair and sat next to her patient. "Why don’t you tell me about Harry.”
Ethan could have walked away at any time, there was no reason to stay, but he was mesmerized listening to the women talk. Kaycee's sincerity and warmth were evident, and for all the times he had treated Mrs. Gernstein, he had never heard her sound so joyful and full of hope. If anyone would have seen them, they would have been amazed at the goofy smile on his lips. Dr. Ramsey, as a lovesick puppy, was not a sight anyone was accustomed to. But that look was replaced by one of horror when he heard Kaycee's chair slide back, and she began to leave the room.
“Well, it has been lovely talking to you, Clara, but I have to go finish up. But I promise I will stop by tomorrow.”
“Please do. And Kaycee.”
“Yes?”
“Thank you. I hope you get a Valentine too!”
“You’re very welcome, Clara. My Valentine is seeing you so happy.”
_____
Her face was aglow when she exited the room. A glance at her watch reminded her that her shift ended fifteen minutes before. She was delighted with how much happiness had been spread, but now she was eager to join her friends at Donahue’s for their Single’s Awareness Day party. She was about to step into the elevator when...
“Dr. MacClennan,” he bellowed.
“Yes, Dr. Ramsey.”
“I need to see you in my office. Right away.”
“Of course,” she said, a long slow sigh escaping her as she followed him.
He pointed to a chair as he circled this desk and told her to take a seat. “Have I done something wrong?”
“On the contrary, you’ve done something right.”
“Oh?”
“I’ve been watching you today.”
“You have?” She asked with an arched brow.
“Yes, and… to be honest, I was astounded by the sincere kindness you displayed to our patients.”
She shrugged her shoulders, dismissing his words, “I was just being nice.”
“It went beyond that, Rook… Kay… Dr. MacTavish. You are a rare person, and I hope you know that.”
“I’m just being nice. It's not that hard to do, you know.”
“Meaning?”
“You should try it more frequently. It would be good for you and those around you.”
Embarrassed, his eyes fell to his desk. That’s when he took notice of a small white plate topped with a heart-shaped cookie, a generously iced cupcake, and a little note that read, “Every day is Valentine’s Day when you are loved.”
“What is this?”
“What does it look like? We certainly weren’t going to give one to every staff member and patient on the floor… except for you.”
He lifted the note from the plate and studied it carefully, tilting his head back to her. “This isn’t your handwriting.”
Kaycee leaned over the desk to take a look. “No, it’s not. Sienna wrote that one, we split the job in half to make it easier.”
A tender smile came to his lips and he wasn't sure if it was a result of the sweets, of the smell of her perfume, which he missed more than he admitted.
“When did you find the time?”
“Don’t you know, Dr. Ramsey? Interns don’t sleep. I’ll do that one day when I’m an attending... like you.”
“Ha!” he laughed, “yes. I suppose you will.”
He fell silent for a moment, and Kaycee was about to ask if she could leave the room when he blurted.
“What are you doing tonight?” It was so spontaneous, he startled himself.
“Uh, I don’t know if that’s any of your….”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine," she smiled. "But, if there is nothing else, I….”
“Could you just wait here… just for one minute before you go?”
“Sure,” she said, falling back into her chair. She stared at the clock on his desk in his absence, watching as the hands slowly tick, and she was so fixated she didn't realize he returned.
“Kaycee?”
She looked up to find him standing next to her, a single red rose in his hand.
“It’s one of the flowers the nurses are selling, you know, to raise….”
“Yes, their charity rose sale... I know.”
“Well,” he blushed, handing the stem to her, “I want you to have it. Happy Valentine’s Day, Dr… Kaycee.”
Kaycee took the rose from his hand, smiling softly as she admired its beauty. “It’s beautiful, Ethan. And very sweet of you, but… I can’t accept it.”
Ethan's face crumbled as she placed it back in his hands.
“What, why not?”
“It wouldn’t be appropriate.”
“But you….”
“Sienna and I left you a treat. The same as we did for everyone on this floor. Now, if you want to go buy a rose for everyone on the floor, I’ll be happy to accept one from you, but if not... I can’t. I don’t want to hear the nurses grumbling about me sleeping with you anymore… especially when I’m not.”
“They’re WHAT?”
“How long have you worked here? You know how hospital gossip is.”
“I try to pay it no mind.”
“I try to do the same, but sometimes it’s hard when you’re the topic, and you don’t have a private office to retreat to.”
Ethan lowered his eyes and stared at the rose he was twirling between his fingers.
“I understand,” he replied sadly. “Why don’t you get going? I’m sure you have plans this evening, I won’t hold you.”
“Thank you. And I appreciate the gesture. Oh!” she said standing up, “you know what you should do with it?”
“What?”
“Go give it to Mrs. Gernstien in 529. If getting a Jello heart from me made her day, a rose from you should make her happy for the next year. Would you do that?”
“Is that what you want me to do, Kaycee?”
"Yes," she nodded. "It is."
“Then I’ll bring it over to her right away.”
With a slight smile on her lips, she made her way to the office door. Her hand was already on the doorknob when he called out.
“Oh, and Kaycee?”
She turned back over her shoulder. “Yes?’
“Happy Valentine's Day.”
She swallowed and smiled sadly, “Good night, Dr. Ramsey.”
_____
A/N 3: I HC that he took a moment to stare at the rose after she left, feeling the loss of her presence. Then the soft look on his face turned to stone. He hits the speakerphone and tells Maureen to come to his office, where he lambasts her (poor thing had nothing to do with it) for allowing the nurses to gossip about him and Kaycee. The nurses have gossiped about him for years, and he's never cared. Maureen smiles because she knows he really has it bad for his intern. She assures him she'll stay on top of them. He is absolutely incorrigible when dealing with any of them going forward. Word gets back to him that Laura is the ring leader. Every time she sees him, she bats her lashes and smiles, and he is now determined to make her life a living hell. lol
PERMATAGS IN REBLOG.
OH Tags: @aishwarya26 @alina-yol-ramsey @kat-tia801 @onikalvoer @panda9584 @peonyblossom @queencarb @swiminthegarden @toadfrog26
Ethan Only Tags: @rookiemartin @takemyopenheart @gryffindordaughterofathena @sincerelyscarring @cryomyst @mysticaurathings @wanderingamongthewildflowers @choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics
#open heart fanfic#ethan ramsey#ethan ramsey x mc#choices fic writers creations#choices fics writers creations#choices monthly challenge#choices february monthly challenge#fics of the week#cfwc fics of the week#valentines day#valentines day 2022
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"ok, uhm.." they sat next to him and took a deep breath before starting.
"I'm a girl. Or maybe I'm not. The first time I breathed in that thought, I felt like I was far too old to be redifining myself, so I coughed it out like a stale cigaratte. after a long night of bad desicions, looked at my reflection and told myself, you're wrong. that night, I put on the prettiest dress I had and went out dancing. 'til I realized I was only skirting around my deepest fears. You see, everytime someone calls me "she", my stomach turns and my skin feels thick. Like someone raised a panic alarm in my brain. And with every "her" that gets hurled my way, I get turned around. I'm not lost, just.. never seem to have the right map. But see, I'm not trapped in a body I hate, just, wrapped in words that don't relate to the way skin feels on my bones. Or, the way that I only feel like home, when no one knows exactly where it is I am, so.. maybe I'm a man. Except I don't think thats right. Theres never been a fight like bar brawls through my veins telling myself I need to change. "him".. feels like a synonymous with someone else. "He", a chorus unto itself, and "him" just fits too loosely. so, maybe I'm not. Either, I mean. I go online to see, do you realize no one is buying this? Do you realize, I'm not selling myself short anymore? Because the first time I opened up the door to the possibility of being myself, I found a treasure map I left for myself back when I was a kid. When the only thing I was scared of loosing, was my sense of self. You see, I never thought we were speaking the same language, untill someone said "they" instead. So tell me I'm wrong, tell me I'm broken. Tell me I must hate myself so much to be the way I am. And I will tell you, I never knew what it was like to fly until I let myself breathe in. Finally found my map, you know? X marks the spot."
(this is not my poem, its from this short film! But I loved it so much and I'm nonbinary myself so I wanted Ruki's reaction to it.)
"How eloquently worded of you to compose such an emotionally-driven masterpiece. You've truly learned so much despite your short time alive, including things about yourself, too. It's a beautiful poem, my dear."
Not quite moved to the point of tears, although steadily approaching an all-encompassing bittersweet wave of sentiment, Ruki's steel-blues traveled from the paper to his child's face, gazing into their eyes before assuming a gentle closed-eye smile to signal that the poem satisfied him with a parental sense of accomplishment that any father should feel after witnessing that the one who lived and treaded an unforgiving world has finally obtained acceptance.
"Well, message aside, I do hope the point of the assignment was to write in free verse... Otherwise, I'm certain you will be docked some points for not maintaining . Kidding, of course. It's wonderful."
Stronger than what any poetry can express, the Vampire enclosed his arms around them, hugging his child tight enough to reach their once troubled heart. A heart fogged with the uncertainty of never being seen the same way they saw themselves, neither male nor female.
"Rather than criticism, I know full well that you seek an audience instead. People who will hear what you have to say, and see you for you. Not because you're trying to sell them a story they'll buy, but because you wish to be acknowledged. If you've finally learned to breathe before flying, then all your father to help you spread those wings and soar to new, unforeseen heights. Surely your teacher and classmates will understand—because we all live under the same sky."
Releasing his child from the embrace, Ruki placed both hands upon their shoulders in reassurance.
"Truth be told, there honestly may have been a time when I couldn't accept such a notion. My past self from eons ago in a world that was very much binary might have argued that people should just accept their birth sex as their identity. That's because I, myself, am what people would label cisgender as you have already surmised. Not to mention that I was raised to essentially become the head of my own household and family someday, given my aristocratic parents. Well, I say to hell with that."
As deeply engraved to the Vampire as those ancient ideologies were, happiness reigned supreme. Happiness for his family, for his children, forevermore.
"No matter what you identify as, I will always love and support you."
#diabolik lovers#ruki mukami#mukami ruki#ask#react#diabolik lovers rp#(( it's a very beautiful message. thank you for sharing it with me as well as others!! ))
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Dear Spence - Night 4
spencer reid x fem!reader
series masterlist
masterlist
fic summary: Going undercover as serial killer bait was simple. Going undercover as serial killer bait three months after being kidnapped was not so simple. Going undercover with the love of my life and having to pretend to be in love with him while also pretending I was pretending was….well it was about as complicated as it sounds.
chapter summary: No secret can be kept forever.
Chapter Word Count: 2.2k
Content: Rated M (16+) fem!reader, mentions of past kidnapping, trauma responses, nightmares, descriptions of past kidnapping, canon-typical violence, fake relationship, friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, only one bed trope
tw for this chapter: descriptions of a panic attack, discussion of the immediate aftermath of a kindnapping
read on ao3
[Prologue] [Night 1] [Night 2] [Night 3]
The entire day had been bliss. Compared to the night before, where my mind was plagued with fear and anxiety, I spent the day following on cloud nine. I woke up in Spencer’s arms, and for the second time we remained wrapped in each other for a few minutes before getting up to start the day. I spent the day finishing his annotated version of Perks of Being a Wallflower, only interrupted periodically by Spencer pulling me away to cook together or dance in the kitchen or play a card game.
It was like I was living in a fantasy world. I was amazed at how easily I forgot the truth, the reason we were here. How easily I put it out of my mind so these days with Spencer would feel untainted. He had that ability- to make me forget everything outside of his attention on me.
Now I was sitting up in bed, finally on the last pages of the book, while Spencer got ready in the bathroom. When he emerged, I was just finishing up the last page. I finally closed the book as he slipped into bed next to me.
“So?” He asked.
“Your thoughts were really interesting. The way you interpreted Charlie’s letters as if they were to himself, in self reflection? I had never thought of it that way before.”
Spencer blushed, “Well, I don’t know for sure, of course-”
“No one does! I love that theory. Personally I subscribe to the belief that they were to someone he lost.” I explained. “I also noticed you underlined my favorite quote. ‘We accept the love we think we deserve.’ Which is like, everyone’s favorite quote, to be fair.”
“It’s a good quote. And I think it rings true, for most people.”
“What was your favorite quote?” I asked. He had underlined and commented on plenty of them, but I was curious which one had stuck out the most in his wonderful mind.
“There are a lot that were poignant.” He nodded down at the duvet, not making eye contact with me. I wanted to reach out and hold his twisting hand, but I didn’t think we had crossed that line yet. Cuddling before bed and in the morning was one thing, random touches that could be misconstrued were another. “But I think-uhm. Well, the one coming to mind is ‘It's just that I don't want to be somebody's crush. If somebody likes me, I want them to like the real me, not what they think I am.’”
My heart ached, and I wanted desperately to grab him by the shoulders and shout I do! I like you for you! In fact, I love you for it! I remembered what came next, as well. “‘And I don't want them to carry it around inside. I want them to show me, so I can feel it too.’” I finished the quote.
Spencer locked eyes with me at that comment. “Yea that part-I struggled with that part.” He admitted. I swallowed down my guilt as I thought about my love for him, that I kept so selfishly to myself.
“W-Why?” I ventured to ask. His eyes boring into mine made it hard to speak.
“Well, I guess I agree with it but I’ve never been, uhm. The best at expressing my emotions. So it would be a little- hypocritical, I suppose.” He chuckled softly at the end of his confession, his eyes dropping by to the bed again. “I-I’ve had feelings for someone. For a while. But I haven’t told them, so I don’t really have room to complain, do I?”
He said the words so casually, so plainly, as if they didn’t rip open my chest and stab me in the heart. As if each of those words weren’t an individual twist in my abdomen, as if the idea of him loving someone else didn’t make me want to vomit. Luckily his eyes were glued to the bed, so he didn’t have the chance to analyze my microexpressions. There was no way I had contained my reaction well enough. The heartbreak must’ve been written plain as day on my face.
After what was probably too long of a pause, I forced out a chuckle. “Yea, I guess that’s fair.” I swallowed tightly and scrambled for a way out. He looked up at me and my heart began to race, terrified of giving myself away. “I, uhm. Just gonna hop in the shower.”
I hurried out of bed, grabbing my pajamas and rushing into the bathroom. Once the door was shut I placed my clothes on the lid of the toilet, and then ran my fingers through my hair, tugging lightly at the strands. I took a deep breath and gathered myself, brushing my hair back and looking in the mirror. Three more days, I reminded myself, repeating it like a mantra. I only had to make it three more days.
The shower turned on hot, still warm from Spencer’s shower earlier. As I was about to strip down, I realized I forgot my towel. I stepped out, planning to grab my towel quickly and get back to my shower, but stopped in my tracks as soon as I opened the door.
Spencer was sitting on the edge of the bed, on my side, my letter in his hands.
Instinct kicked in faster than I expected, and I ran over and ripped the letter out of his hands. “What are you doing?!” I shouted, gripping the letter tight to my chest. Spencer seemed frozen. “Th-That’s private.” I stuttered, getting my voice down to a regular level again. My mind began racing, trying to work out what to say, how to explain. I braced myself for the inevitable rejection while I tried to think of a way not to compromise the mission.
“I’m sorry, I just-” He cut himself off, coughing into his hand to clear his throat. “I was looking for the case file, and that was in the drawer, and it had my name on it.” He didn’t offer any further explanation, and I couldn’t find it in myself to be mad at him, even though I still felt a distinct ache of betrayal.
“You weren’t-No one was supposed to see this. Ever.” I admitted looking down at the words as they blurred from the tears in my eyes.
“You said-You said that he didn’t make you. That we got there before-”
“I lied. I just- I knew it would be submitted to evidence, and I didn’t-” I choked on the words, thinking about that day. About the hours after I was rescued that I spent in the back of an ambulance, and then in an interview room, this piece of paper pressed between the underwire of my bra and the skin of my chest. My body started shaking, tremors starting at my hands as I tried to chase the memories away.
That whole day Spencer was right by my side, his fingers laced through mine. I was in a daze, too out of it to be grateful for the contact. He drove me home, too, and slept on my couch when I timidly asked him to stay. It was the first time I had asked him, the first time my need for him to be there outweighed my fear of it being too revealing.
Before I knew what was happening I was sitting on the floor, my chin pressed tight to my chest and my arms wrapped tightly around my legs. I tried to get my breathing under control, inhaling deeply but my chest was too tight and I couldn’t get a full breath in. Blood rushed through my ears, the world turned blurry, and then-
“Hey, hey.” Spencer’s voice cut through the chaos, his warm hands gently reaching out to hold onto my forearm, pulling me out of the pretzel I had wrapped myself into. “Look at me.” He whispered. I willed my eyes to raise, locking eyes with him. He was kneeling across from me on the floor, hands now holding my own gently. “You’re here. You’re safe.” He said seriously. I nodded, closing my eyes and dropping my head back, breathing deeply until it felt normal again.
As the adrenalin in my bloodstream dwindled, my body sagged with exhaustion. Tears pricked my eyes in embarrassment, pulling my hands away from Spencer to press them into my eyes. Here he was, comforting me, despite knowing how I felt. Knowing how I had been using him this week. It was proof he was too good for me. I took a shaky breath, trying not to let myself panic again. He probably just pitied me.
When I had gathered myself enough, I sniffled and looked back at him. He had settled onto the ground, his back against the bed, looking at me with such concern. I picked up the letter from the ground where it had fallen when I broke down. I scanned it, as if I didn’t have the whole thing memorized. At the thought I remembered - Spencer also had it memorized now. He knew every word by heart the second he laid eyes on it. The thought made my breath hitch again.
“I never-” I swallowed tightly. “I never wanted you to read this.”
Spencer was quiet for a long time. I didn’t dare look up, terrified to see the look of pity that was sure to be present before he rejected me for good. I will love you endlessly, Spencer Reid. If only it wasn’t so true.
“At least you didn’t write your secret.” Spencer finally said. My eyes snapped to him, my brow furrowing. He was clearly upset, but trying to pretend it was a good thing. “Although I-I wish you would tell me.”
I realized all at once that he hadn’t understood the letter at all. He thought that I had gotten cut off. He couldn’t even imagine me confessing my love to him. He probably couldn’t even think of me in a romantic sense. I wasn’t sure if it was better or worse than outright rejection.
“I can’t.” I said quietly.
Spencer bit his lip harshly, wringing his hands together in his lap. “Why not? You know I would never judge you.”
“It’s not-It’s not important.” I folded the letter, going to stand up. A hand on my ankle stopped me, Spencer leaning over to halt my motions.
“[Y/N].” There were words unspoken, a silent plea for me to tell him the meaning behind the letter. I knew that I couldn’t do it though. I couldn’t tell him, watch the realization happen, watch the understanding dawn on his features. I shook my head as I stood, his fingers slipping off of my ankle.
“It’s not important.” I repeated, grabbing my towel and escaping to the bathroom.
I took a long time in the shower. Spencer must have realized I was waiting him out, because eventually he turned out the light and I slipped into the room quietly. When I got in bed, I planned to just drift off, but Spencer wasn’t stupid. His voice softly cut through the darkness.
“[Y/N], I’m sorry. That letter was private, and maybe I shouldn’t have picked it up.” I heard him swallow, and his voice sounded tight. “But no one’s- no one’s ever said those things about me before. And I just wanted to say thank you. And that I’m here if you want to talk.”
I rolled over so I was facing him, and could just barely make out his face in the moonlight that draped over the bed. “You’re welcome, Spencer. Every word of that letter is true. You deserve to hear it more often.”
His face melted and he shimmied closer to me, hands still tucked under his own head. “For the record, I will love you endlessly, too.” He admitted quietly. My heart leaped into my throat. “You’re one of the most amazing people I know, and there’s no one I’d be prouder to have as my best friend.”
My smile must have had a hint of melancholy when I said “Thanks, Spence.” I knew the truth but when he said it like that it hurt. I loved being his best friend, for a long time I was convinced it was all I needed. Maybe one day I could get back there, and be around him without feeling like there were knives in my heart.
“You deserve to hear it more often.” He repeated my own words back to me with a small smirk. I rolled my eyes, but he finally reached out and pulled me close. “Just because you’re keeping a secret from me doesn’t mean we don’t get cuddles.” He said almost petulantly.
“Of course, how silly of me.” I caved, resting my head on his chest.
He cradled my head in his hand, fingers dancing in my hair, and just before I fell asleep I swore I felt a brush of his lips on my forehead.
I must’ve been dreaming.
[Night 5]
<<<<>>>>
series taglist: (join here!) @sophiasrant @nano-noa @fakin-it-til-i-make-it @mrsobrien888 @claireahh@this-is-doctor-and-its-calm @hackedlol123 @honeybxes @givemeth @sarahcameronswife @bitchwhytho @blameitonthenight21 @spookydrreid @hopeless-romanticnamed-s @thefuturelawyer @bloodwiitchh @bamitzzsam @reidscardigans @arrowurboat @spencers-anna-kittenn @amurderofcrowsinatrenchcoat @gubesboo @singularbelle
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#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fan fiction#spencer reid fan fic#spencer reid angst#criminal minds fan fiction#spencer reid x you#my post#my writing#dear spence
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It started off with going out with friends less and less, ditching the fishnet under her jacket. Swapping it for something that couldn't be seen through. After that one mission, Obiko couldn't look into her reflection. She'd cover herself in the sheet Madara had given her.
Over time, however... she grew to embrace the scars on her body. They weren't disgusting like Rin had said, they were a symbol of strength, and survival. Although she still covers most of her body, it's more for comfort. She prefers having longer clothes, because it not onlg separates her from her silly younger self, but it also shows how she's matured. In her mind, at least. Hot and cold never bothered her anyway, why not be comfortable in her own skin?
She keeps the mask on though, not just to hide her identity, but to save children the confusion of why their parents cover their eyes and usher them away when they see her.
She may be comfortable with her scars, but others aren't. Especially... her face.
But then... Deidara comes into the picture. Still quite young, untouchable despite being 19. Obiko wouldn't take his youth away from him.
But when he sees her without her mask, completely by coincidence and accident (they shared a room, he was bound to see at least some of her exposed), he didn't grimace. He didn't turn in disgust.
He stood in awe, shocked greatly by the painful scars deeply moulded into a sharp, beautiful face. They didn't take away from the beauty, but instead added to it. Flawed but still flawless. His face burned a bright, he fiddled with his fingers. Stuttering. "S-sorry, hm! I-I didn't mean to walk in beautiful- I- I MEAN TOBIKO- I'M SORRY, HM!!"
Obiko froze. Beautiful? Surely he mustn't have seen properly. Her hair was still long, it would have hidden her ugly... right? She pushed it away, afterall, he was still to young. Regardless of what he had seen.
She won't take advantage of him. She's better than that.
Despite everything, the Akatsuki a thing of the past, she sits on their bed. Her back turned to him, as he presses his lips to every line, every indent. Covering larger scars first, before hunting for the small ones. Leaving kisses everywhere he can.
He doesn't go to her lower back, he knows how it makes her feel. Uncomfortable, and dirty. He doesn't mind, though. He can reach the biggest scars without getting too low, and he can see everything from where he sits.
Deidara can't complain, this is a big step for Obiko. Simply being behind her, something so so hated by the Uchiha, was beyond an honour.
"You've already kissed that one..."
"It's bigger... it needs more love, hm."
Obiko smiles softly, Deidara was truly too loving to her. She didn't deserve him, after all she had done, but here he is, crawling over to be in front of her... just to kiss more scars.
He's gentle, and delicate, something very unusual for him. He doesn't need to be, she doesn't feel pain anymore. "It doesn't matter if you can feel pain or not, I want to be gentle" he insists. But she enjoys it.
Small, tender moments in there room, alone but with each other.
Obiko catches him by surprise, leaning forward and kissing the deep scar from Kakuzu's unsteady stitches. She moves up to his face, brushing his hair to the side and pressing her lips to his.
He blushes, hard, his cheeks almost as red as her Sharingan. When did she activate it?
"Wh-what's with the sudden... uhm... ehh??" He stammered. Intimidated greatly. Her confidence, her firm kisses, they were always just too much. She made his heart almost explode.
"Just making sure you get all of my scars... and reciprocating the affection."
Her smile turned into a smirk, he pouted. He leapt forward, knocking Obiko back and into a war of kisses. Big arms embraced him, her laughter breaking the kiss. It was loud, deep in tone but so genuine.
He nuzzled into her hair, now cut short, but still so thick. Her laughter settled, but their smiles didn't fade.
"Deidara... I have a proposal for you."
"What is it, hm?"
He looked up at her, his eyes bright, sparkling with wonder.
"Marry me."
The question was out of the blue, but it didn't stop him. Uchiha Deidara was something he had been thinking of for a while.
Obiko waited for him to answer, for the first time in years, she was nervous.
"Absolutely, hm!"
#obito uchiha#uchiha obito#obito#tobi#obiko uchiha#uchiha obiko#obiko#tobiko#deidara#akatsuki#the akatsuki#tobidei#obidei#genderbend#opposite gender#my girl and her boy
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Spoiler Alert : Finishing Little Women
Proceed at your own risk - you have been warned.
Last night I finally got to see the last episode of Little Women and boy oh boy my first impression was correct. This series is dark and unrelenting from start to finish. The sisters, especially the oldest two, don't catch a breather until right at the end of the last episode.
I guess not unexpectedly given the title and the supposed homage, the series is satisfyingly female centric. All of the actresses are given space to establish and develop their characters from the sisters themselves to the formidable great aunt with a hidden past to the mysterious, mostly presumed dead, Jin Hwa Young.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/27b83b002d14c5c2887f5de314faeff2/f10b6fe3cffbf36e-84/s540x810/46d18183670f57d6198815612b98de12c67b143d.jpg)
Kim Go-Eun as Oh In-joo provides the beating heart of the series. A character whose every emotion, however fleeting, is reflected in her expression. She wants to provide for her family and is tempted by the "easy" money that comes so unexpectedly into her hands. Her goal is to raise them from poverty. Poverty here, meaning not only a lack of wealth but a brand of relative worth which the rich have promoted and is now fully accepted by society. It's a tactic not exclusive to the elites of South Korea. Sometimes the social comment in kdramas only serves to bring the reasons for growing inequality elsewhere in the world into sharper focus.
Nam Ji-Hyun as Oh In-Kyung is the tireless fighter for truth and justice who will take on typhoons but who is swept away by the tears of broken families. She is self accusing and fragile which leads her to numb her senses at the bottom of a vodka bottle. However, once she gets her teeth into the story, she is relentless and agile. So many obstacles and threats had to be faced and overcome in order for the truth to be finally revealed.
Park Ji-Hu as Oh In-hye and Jeon Chae-eun as Park Hyo-rin wonderfully express that love, care and fierce loyalty that comes with an adolescent best friend relationship. How fitting that they should escape the madness of the blue orchid together. Their closing scene on the ship in Episode 10 when they know they are finally free was beautiful and uplifting.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/003da54cd4b2cb6162e6aa37c66133aa/f10b6fe3cffbf36e-87/s540x810/158e27db70054bbc664ac2e81ea53623a1606c89.jpg)
Finally, Uhm Ji Won was an eye opener as the gleefully manipulative and malicious Won Sang-ah. To the last her murderous tendencies are flamboyant and theatrical so much so that her James Bond villain ending seemed only fitting.
Overall this series was unexpected and ultimately very satisfying and a nice counterpoint to Extraordinary Attorney Woo which I saw earlier in the year. What shall I watch next?
Post Date: 29/10/2022
#little women 2022#kdrama little women#kim go eun#nam ji hyun#park ji hu#jeon chae eun#uhm ji won#little women#kdrama#sisters got soul
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hi Gia, love, I’m so proud of you. You deserve it so so much!!!
🌗if it wouldn’t be a problem, can you write a blurb with James where the reader wears makeup and is insecure without it, because she has acne? :(
love you and your work so much
so bewitching
james potter x fem!reader
summary: james sees you without makeup for the first time.
word count: 1.2k
warnings: insecurity, self doubt, swearing, mentions of anxiety, insecurities surrounding blemishes and acne
a/n: thank u dear, and to anyone with acne, blemishes, textured skin, dark circles, and anyone with skin insecurities come here let me kiss ur forehead ur beautiful <3
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9271c84261b15c75988128165ca04aaa/6d4a49e67571a763-37/s540x810/9d8aa4e3610627118ec4dc265c3c5f2fdb979f6e.jpg)
“what is it?” james questioned from his seated place on your bed, gazing at the creases in your bed comforter then over to your anxious figure; you had standing in the doorway of your bathroom for the last five minutes picking and biting at your nails, now, shifting from foot to foot while the wood underneath your feet creaked under your anxiety-ridden figure.
your heartbeat could’ve been going faster than a chevrolet from ‘79 from the built anxiety that was clung to your bloodstream from the moment james asked you if he could stay the night and watch those ‘muggle films’ you had been smitten with. both you and james had only been dating for a few weeks and best friends prior, but this was the first time he had wanted to stayed in your room overnight and before thinking you had said yes.
therefore, you had to take off your same face of makeup that you had been wearing since the brick of puberty had hit you in the face third year. the thought of going to bed with foundation clogging your pores, and your eyelashes sticking together was tremendously unappealing to your acne ridden skin that was hidden underneath your makeup.
“uhm, it’s nothing i just, i have to take my makeup off.” you stammered slowly as you burned a glare into the dark mahogany floor then looking at james pointing a thumb in a backwards direction. you were afraid i mean what if the boy that the boy that you had finally gotten to show your adorned love might’ve found you ugly for your textured skin. his brows creased immensely while diving into his mind in thought. okay... but what’s the problem?
you gaped into the same cerulean eyes you had fallen in love with for the past several years, his eyes sprouted in confusion as his pupils dilated at you, his eyes crinkling as he thought as to why you were procrastinating a simple task. james gestured to the bathroom, waiting for you to do so.
your breath trembled as you sighed in anxiety, your breath starting to quiver when you made eye contact with your reflection in the substantially big mirror, you fiddled with your fingers for a few seconds— maybe you could’ve taken it off and quickly put on some bb cream?
bad idea, if would’ve made to your skin worse. so you tapped your forehead a few times to disperse your fearful thoughts before quickly grabbing the moist wipe from the viridescent package and smearing the ivory wipe all over the ripples in your flesh.
the quick reddening hues becoming more distinct as your swiped off all the foundation along with other products that coated your face deeply. you felt embarrassed and maybe even ashamed, nobody else your age had this many pimples— normally they had a zit or two and they could cover it easily if it even bothered them, but you, you had to cover the reddening marks every single morning.
you didn’t want people to see your biggest insecurity, at first it was just something expressive to put on your face. something normally all girls did in third year or up, but over time it grew to be something so much more than that; and now you couldn’t even go to breakfast without at least covering up those pesky specs of red all over your face.
you looked in your reflection again, and boy did you hate what you saw. you assumed that james would hate it just as much, maybe even more than you did, but were your assumptions so mistaken.
you shook your head in an attempt to clear your destructive thoughts yet again, hastily walking over and sitting next to him on the creased lilac comforter. he zoned out of his thoughts, turning his head and seeing his dark-brunette tendrils swish as he moved; james was adamantly gaping at you, mouth blubbering like a fish and your face utterly bare.
you were so— so beautiful.
“what— why are you staring at me like that.” your question rung through his ears like bells, your mind quickly puzzling together the worst in extensive insecurity. placing your palms on the planes of your cheeks in away to cover up from him and his intense gaze on your face.
“you’re so fucking stunning.” james whispered, more to himself than you, but subconsciously grabbing your palms away from the apples of your cheeks and replacing them with his own calloused palms. he encased his hands onto your face, the rough exterior of his hands directly on the textures of your face while gazing at your features.
the pads of his thumbs directly stroking the ripples in your skin, the adoration in his warm eyes glowering over your face. “merlin, i don’t think i ever want to see you wear makeup again.” his voice was crooning, and murmured softly to you, he was so adamantly confused as to why you would cover your face. you felt the warmth in his hands directly on the apples of your cheeks, he felt your small smile graze your lips in his palms from the rising of your cheeks; similar pride swirling in his mind like pure elation and gratification, it was your smile that you gave only the gryffindor boy.
“i didn’t— i didn’t want you to think i was, like, ugly....” you stumbled off in humility, intensely staring again, this time towards your lap rather than the deep brown colour of your floor. his slouched figure looked at you in dejection— you were the most beautiful person to ever exist, how could he ever think you of all people were ugly?
you felt his nose nudge against yours softly, looking you deep into those same adorning cerulean eyes pooling in the cool shade of blue that you continually gaped into while timidity hazardously creeped onto your face in embarrassment of your confession.
“y/n, how could you ever— why would you ever think that? you’re utterly the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen, ever.” his sincerity spoke directly to the heart that had been rapidly beating in your chest, sorrow overwhelmed his nervous system at your insecurity. “i just— acne, pimples, scarring all that it’s not, it’s not like pretty on me i guess.” your voice was truthful while you stammered trying to be honest with him and pick the right words, not a singular ounce dishonesty in your voice.
“but it makes you so, so beautiful. you’re face it’s so unique, and makeup or not you’re still the most angelic thing that exists; and that’s factual i won’t take no for an answer.” he crooned, removing one of his hands from your face and sponging small kisses onto the planes of your cheeks, directly onto your flushed cheeks at his affirmations.
“you’re so— so perfect in my eyes, y’know some gits have other definitions of perfect but who cares because this is mine and too be honest mine is the only one that matters so, that’s my statement.” he added humorously, feeling the vibrations of your chuckle into his palm send shockwaves of your happiness through his blood stream.
“my witch, is so, so bewitching.”
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#james potter one shot#james potter fluff#james potter fic#james potter fanfiction#james potter x oc#james potter x you#james potter#james potter x y/n#james potter x reader#james potter series#james potter supremacy#james potter smut#james potter angst#james & peter & remus & sirius
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underrated SFF books (YA and Adult)
So uhm, since I keep seeing the same books on my dash all the time (and I like them too, just...there’s more! to read!) here’s a list of less popular SFF books, divided into YA and Adult. I’ve tried to mention when there is lgbt rep and the trigger warnings. Also, books written by poc will be in bold. Please point out any typo or mistake or if I’ve forgotten specific rep/tw mentions.
All of these are books that I’ve read and enjoyed (by enjoyed I mean anything from 3 stars and above), but if anyone wants to add titles please feel free to do so!!
YA:
The Star-Touched Queen by Roshani Chokshi: beautifully written, fairytale-like story rich in mythology (inspired by several Hindu myths. There’s a full list on goodreads indicated by the author herself). Roshani’s prose is gorgeous.
A Crown of Wishes by Roshani Chokshi: it’s a companion novel to The Star-Touched Queen, but both can be read as a standalone. I liked this one more than its companion and I particularly loved how the romance was written (slow burn, but specifically, the author really highlights the mutual respect between the characters, we love to see it).
The Young Elites by Marie Lu: fantasy trilogy set in a world inspired by Renaissance Italy, in which children who survived a mysterious and deadly illness ended up with strange and dangerous powers. Secret societies and a female villain!
The Kingdom of Back by Marie Lu: historical fantasy following Mozart’s sister, Nannerl, a girl as talented as her brother, but afraid of being forgotten because of the lack of opportunities she has to be seen and heard. Nuanced sibling relationship, no romance.
The Midnight Lie by Marie Rutkoski: fantasy f/f romance! Both a coming of age story set in a society with a rigid class system and a slow burn f/f romance with a lot of banter. TW: abuse.
The Weight of Feathers by Anna-Marie McLemore: magical realism. The book follows two families of traveling performers that have been locked in a feud for over a generation. This was the author’s debut and I remember getting an arc of it and being impressed by both the prose and how the forbidden love trope was handled.
When the Moon was Ours by Anna-Marie McLemore: another magical realism novel. One of the main characters is a trans boy and the book focuses on issues of racism and gender. One of my favorite YA!
Strange Grace by Tessa Gratton: fantasy romance set in a village that periodically sacrifices a young man in order to keep a deal with the devil that ensures their prosperity. Also, polyamorous and non-binary rep.
The Rise of Kyoshi by F.C. Yee: first book in a duology following avatar Kyoshi’s life. It explores the political and cultural aspect of the Earth Kingdom and Kyoshi’s past. Bisexual rep.
Descendant of the Crane by Joan He: sort of a murder mystery fantasy, as the main character finds herself suddenly thrust into power once her father has been murdered. The story has a slow build up to a last part full of twists and machinations and it features lots of court intrigue. Warning: the ending is quite open and afaik there isn’t a sequel planned as of now.
The Bone Houses by Emily Lloyd-Jones: a quite unique take on zombies influenced by Welsh mythology (it’s super cool). The novel follows Ryn and their siblings, as they try to get by after their parents’ death by working as gravediggers. Only well, the dead don’t always stay dead. The characters read a bit younger than they are imo. There is chronic pain rep.
The Magnolia Sword by Sherry Thomas: retelling of the original ballad of Mulan. The book follows Mulan, who’s trained her whole life to win a duel for a priceless heirloom, as she joins the army. There’s a lot of political and historical details, which I really appreciated. Do not go into it expecting a fun adventure though. The descriptions of war aren’t extremely graphic, but be aware of the fact that most of the book is set during a conflict.
The Candle and The Flame by Nafiza Azad: standalone fantasy set in a city on the Silk Road! It’s a quite slow-paced tale about love, family and politics. It has lush descriptions of landscapes and cultures (and FOOD, there are some really great descriptions of food). It’s a very atmospheric book and while I struggled a bit with the pace I’d still recommend it.
Forest of a Thousand Lanters by Julie C. Dao: sort of an East Asian inspired retelling of Snow White, but following the Evil Queen before she became Snow White’s stepmother. I honestly haven’t read its sequel (which should focus on Snow White herself), but I do think this can be read and enjoyed as a standalone too.
The Queen’s Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner: it’s hard to point out exactly what this series is about because it has evolved so much with time. It starts out as classic quest/adventure series with The Thief (which may seem a classic and simple book, but is actually full of foreshadowing and has a really clever set up), but develops into a complex and intriguing political fantasy in The Queen of Attolia and The King of Attolia (and then goes back to the quest theme in book 5, Thick as Thieves).
Adult:
A Fist of Permutations in Lightning and Wildflowers by Alyssa Wong: I’m cheating with this one because it’s technically a short story but I love Alyssa Wong’s stories so I’m putting it here anyway. It can be read for free and you should just...read it.
The Poppy War by R.F. Kuang: grimdark fantasy (TW: abuse, self harm, rape, drug abuse), inspired by Chinese history. It’s adult, but follows younger MCs and the unique blend of different historical periods/inspirations makes it extremely interesting. The characters are extremely fucked up in the best possible way, plus the use of shamanism is awesome. Please make sure you check all the TW before reading.
The Sword of Kaigen by M.L. Wang: a Japanese-inspired militaristic fantasy, with elemental magic, a badass housewife dealing with her past and hiding a sword in her kitchen’s floor. It has interesting and nuanced family dynamics and a great reflection on propaganda and the use of narratives.
Empire of Sand by Tasha Suri: first book in an epic fantasy duology inspired by Mughal India (TW: abuse, slavery). I really liked both Empire of Sand and its companion and I find them pretty underrated. Both books have great slow burn romance (with a focus on mutual trust and respect) and focus on culture, religion, self acceptance and politics.
Gods of Jade and Shadow by Silvia Moreno-Garcia: a fantasy bildungsroman set in Mexico during the Jazz age. It’s a great approach to adult SFF as it follows a young girl on a life changing adventure. It features Mayan mythology and a god slowly becoming human (this trope is everything!).
The Bear and the Nightingale by Katherine Arden: a coming of age story inspired by Russian folklore. The trilogy as a whole has one of the best arcs I’ve ever seen: each book is perfectly self-contained and has its own arc, but also fits perfectly in the bigger picture of the trilogy. The atmosphere is amazing, the cast of characters is extremely well developed. Also frost demons are better than men.
The Binding by Bridget Collins: historical fantasy, but with very minimal fantasy elements. It’s set in a world vaguely reminiscent of 19th century England. I’d say this book is about humans and self discovery. It’s about cowardice and the lies we tell ourselves and those we wish we could tell ourselves. Gay rep. (TW: abuse, sexual assault, pretty graphic suicide scene).
The Divine Cities trilogy by Robert Jackson Bennett: starting with City of Stairs, it follows a female diplomat and spymaster(!!). The whole trilogy features an interesting discussion about godhood, religion, fanatism, politics, without ever being boring or preachy. It has complex and rich world building and a pretty compelling mystery.
Foundryside by Robert Jackson Bennett: heist fantasy following a thief as she’s hired to steal a powerful artifact that may change magical technology as she knows it. Set in a Venice-like merchant city. Also, slow burn f/f romance.
Jade City by Fonda Lee: sort of a gangster urban fantasy, heavily inspired by wuxia and set in an Asian-inspired metropolis. It follows a pretty big cast of characters, each with their own journey and development. It features nuanced family dynamics and a lot of political and economical subplots. Not extremely prominent, but book 2 features m/m side rep.
Trail of Lightning by Rebecca Roanhorse: inspired by Native American culture and specifically by the idea of subsequent worlds. It has a kickass MC and a good mix of original elements and typical UF tropes. TW: the book isn’t extremely violent but there is death and some gore.
A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine: space opera inspired by the Mexica and middle period Byzantium. It focuses on topics like colonialism and the power of narratives and language. It has one of the best descriptions of what it’s like to live in between spaces I’ve ever read. Also very interesting political intrigue and has a slow burn f/f romance (and a poly relationship recalled through flashbacks). I ranted a lot about it already.
Ninefox Gambit by Yoon Ha Lee: a Korean-inspired space opera with a magic system based on math. It’s honestly quite convoluted and difficult to follow, but it also features some of the best political intrigue I’ve ever read. Plenty of lying, backstabbing and mind games. It also features lesbian and bisexual rep and an aroace side character (TW: mass shooting, sexual assault, abuse). I also really recommend Yoon Ha Lee’s short-story collection Conservation of Shadows.
The long way to a small angry planet by Becky Chambers: character driven space opera featuring a found family journeying through space. A fun read, that also deals with topics such as sexuality and race. Quite easy to go through, as the world building and plot aren’t particularly complex themselves. f/f romance.
The Empress of Salt and Fortune by Nghi Vo: an Asian-inspired fantasy novella that gives a voice to people usually silenced by history. It follows a cleric (non binary rep) as they chronicle the story of the late empress, retold through objects that she used in her life. It focuses on bonds between women and the power that lies in being unnoticed. f/f side rep.
The Black God’s Drums by P. Djèlí Clark: an urban fantasy novella, based on Orisha mythology and set in an alternate, sort of steampunk, New Orleans. I really like how creative Clark’s worlds are and how good he is at writing female characters (which rarely happens with male authors).
The haunting of tram car 015 by P. Djèlí Clark: novella set in an alternate steampunk Cairo populated by supernatural entities. It’s set in the same world of a Dead Djinn in Cairo, which is a short story you can read for free.
This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone: epistolary novella set during a time-travel war. It has gorgeous writing and an amazing f/f romance. As a novella, it’s quite short but it’s beautifully crafted and so complex for such a short book!
The Citadel of Weeping Pearls by Aliette de Bodard: a novella set in the Xuya universe (a series of novellas/short stories set in a timeline where Asia became dominant, and where the space age has empires of Vietnamese and Chinese inspiration), but can be read as a standalone. It’s a space opera featuring a disappeared citadel and the complex relationship between the empress and her daughter as war threatens her empire.
One for My Enemy by Olivie Blake: self-published urban fantasy following two rival families in New York. Sort of a Romeo and Juliette retelling but with gangster families and magic. Honestly recommend all of her books, I love how Olivie writes and especially how she writes female characters.
#book recs#book recommendations#adult sff#ya literature#lgbt fiction#litblr#listen this doesn't show in tags i'm DONE#done with this tagging system lol#also if there are mistakes please tell me!!#book rec
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Ok ok! Good uhm.
Ok since body dysmorphia has been kicking my butt lately i wanted to request something with Schlatt where basically the reader Starts getting really insecure because of their body. Pushing and pulling on their stomach etc. They also start binding unsafely with like really tight bras because they can't afford a binder and they end up fucking up their ribs really bad. They end up in the hospital and a very worried Schlatt visit's them and lectures them about how they shouldn't have done that and about how worried he was. So when they get back home there is a gift on the bed, turns out Schlatt bought them a binder.
The reader would be Non-binary and afab.
Also a little message for pretty much anyone who is insecure about their body/has body dysmorphia because of their chest, don't bind unsafely. That can really fuck up your chest and make you actually being happy with your body even harder.
Hell yes. I love this idea thank you icarus! Writing has been rude to me lately and I needed inspiration. This has hit it exactly.
Pronouns:nonbinary (dont think any were actually used in this so yeah.)
Tw: AFAB reader, swearing, insecurity, mention of surgry, mention of blood, mention of hating self, pain. Again angst to fluff. It is reflecting on how I have felt about my body before because I needed to make it seem kinda real.
PSA: please dont bind safely. It's dangerous and can lead to serious health consequences. I know hating your body sucks but I dont want anyone to get hurt because they dont listen to their lungs, they dont take off their binder, or if their bras are way too fucking tight. It can and will hurt you. So please bind safely!!
Happy birth-what the fuck?!
Lately your brain was giving you more dysphoria then ever. Telling you your body was too big, your boobs were too noticable, and you hips are too feminine.
What brought this on? Someone simply said your dead name. It made your dysphoria hit you like a truck.
After that day everything went down hill. Your stopped streaming, telling your followers that you were going on a mental break, you didn't really talk to friends, your brain could put words together. And you most importantly barely texted your loving supporting boyfriend schaltt, not wanting to break down in front of him.
You never had the time or thoughts of getting a chest binder. It was your biggest mistake honestly.
Deciding against chest binders and wearing alot of tight bras to flatten you. But it didnt work. So you got tighter bras. And they did work. But you didnt read up on how to bind safely.
This lead to the predicament now. In front of your mirror you were pinching and pulling at your skin. There was too much. All you wanted to do was cut it off with scissors. But decided against it due to the fact of all the blood that you would loose.
Your chest, smaller then it was yas, was still visible after your 3rd bra. You decided to add a 4th and tighter one hoping it would completely hide your boobs.
Your body made you want to puke. It made you feel disgusting. But you never told schaltt that. Afraid that he would say that you looked as gross as you thought you did.
Only 5 minutes after the 4th bra you felt excoriating pain in your ribs. And worse of all a harsh pop. That immediately brought red flags. It hurt to breath. Your head fuzzy and light headed.
Your only reaction, to call for an ambulance. Dialing the three numbers as you whimpered in pain you held onto your lungs. "911 what's your emergency?" "I cant breathe. It hurts so bad. Please help." "Are you by yourself?" "Yes. I need help please." "Ambulance, firemen, and police are on their way. Ambulance is 2 minutes out."
You didnt know if you had 2 minutes. "They can break the door down if I dont answer." That's all you said after collapsing.
Next thing you knew your door was busted off its hinges and you saw two paramedics. They were quick to transfer you to the ambulance, cutting through the four bras that held your chest.
It help get air to your lungs but it barely helped.
"We have a collapsed lung. ETA 2 minutes." The paramedic back there with you spoke to the walkie talkie.
Collapsed lung? Was that the harsh pop? God, was the bras that bad of an idea? All that was going through your mind was how you possibly could get worse. The instant you got into the trauma bay was way worse. With no time to numb you and your O2 stats dropping they had to cut between your ribs and shove a tube right next to your left lung. Draining air and excess blood blocking your lung from inflating. And before you knew it you were off to emergency surgery for getting a shard of bone out of your chest cavity.
The last thing you remember was counting down and falling asleep.
When you woke up your boyfriend was next to your bed, hands engulfing one of yours.
It looked like he had been crying before falling asleep on one of your legs. Taking your free hand through his hair you smiled lightly. "I'm sorry for all of this ram boy." He grunted lightly and moved his head back into your hand. His messy hair was thick and nearly matted. It made you wonder how long he's been sitting there. You loved him and felt so selfish for doing this to him.
"I cant believe I did all this and for what? To cause you and everyone pain? All because i couldnt afford a chest binder and deciding that I might as well try another way. I should have been safer huh?" You didnt expect an answer back. Just his quite snores.
"Yeah. Not really fuckin selfish more like kinda dumb. Your body doesnt show who the fuck you are (y/n). Your heart does. And your heart isnt say boy or girl. Its saying you are you. A person who uses pronouns they them. A person that love everyone and cares for their friends. A person who love me and jambo so deeply."
He took a breath.
"You normally are quite smart. Saving up for one would of been a better idea instead of doing such a stupid thing. Asking for my help. Because if I knew I would of helped. I would of found one just right for you. I would help you remember to take it off after 8 hours. Even would of found a way to make you feel more like you."
You could hear his heart break.
"But now you're here, four broken ribs, a healing lung, and stuck in the hospital for another week at least."
You felt so guilty. He was right. You should of told him. He would never have seen you like you saw yourself. He never cared about how you looked. He only cared for your heart.
Tears falling down your face you continued to massage his scalp. "I could of lost you. You are my rock. When I cant keep up my normal antics and feel like I'm at an all time low. You are there to pick me up." You had to stop the sob from coming up. "I'm just so happy youre alive." He looked up.
His red eyes were making your heart ache. "I wont do it again I promise. But I cant just ignore the feeling of dread whe. I look down and realize I present so much like a girl. I dont wa t to be one." Schaltt nodded and kissed the hand he was holding. "Then let me help you. I wont let this happen again. Just please. Come to me. Talk to me. I'm here like you are for me."
You gave a small nod.
This man knew his way to your heart. He was so sincere about this. "I will. But promise me you wont look down on me if I end up feeling like that." You just needed to make sure you knew he would never but you needed his words. "Mever sugarbabe. Never in my life have I looked down on you and never will."
God the week was long, him and the doctor explaining safe binding that you cant fully bind for at least 6-8 weeks. Schlatt telling you his reaction to finding your apartment swarmed with police and firemen and you no where to be seen.
He was practicing on saying happy birthday to you. But was cut off. "Happy birth-what the fuck?!" He was so concerned and even more so when you were in hospital.
When you did go home he helped you through the door, and watched you as you saw the small package on your couch.
Opening it you saw a chest binder. Specifically the one you were looking at. Looking over to schaltt with tears in your eyes you walked up and hugged him lightly minding the pain in your left side. This was the best gift.
The only gift you had been wanting for the past week or two. "Now you can be safe. But no binding till your doctor says so or I swear to god I will personally smite you down." You had to try so hard no to laugh or the pain would of been hell. Kissing his cheek you smiled.
"Of course schaltt. I will make sure to not wear it till I'm healed dont want to get blood on it ya know. Also it would hurt like a fucking bitch."
He chuckled and ruffled your hair. "Alright now go sit down. I'll get you some soup ya dork."
This was going to be a great time. That was until the pain fully came back. And then this is going to be a mediocre time.
Please pardon spelling errors. I havent proof read. And I am on mobile for almost all stories. But thank you so much for requesting this became something that I could write and it helped me alot. Now I might take a while for other things too and i apologize that's cause i am starting school soon. Also family issues. So yeah might take a bit. Dont know how long though. I'll try to keep them coming but if not you know I'm studying or helping my mom and grandma.
Eli out.
#jschlatt x reader#mcyt fluff#schlatt x reader#mcyt#mcyt schlatt#dsmp schlatt#schlatt fluff#schlatt#please bind safely#non binary#tw: body harm#tw: body dysphoria#tw: body dysmorphia
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