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rebelelegance · 2 years ago

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Could you do a young!James Potter where reader tries to ask him to be their valentines but he keeps talking over them and talking about Lilly. So reader gets fed up and asks someone else, and James gets jealous or smth?

Hypocrisy

Summary: James doesn’t seem to want anyone other than Lily. So after one point, you decide to stop trying

Requested by anon

w/c: 4,500+

Pairing : James Potter x reader, Surprise marauder x reader, marauders x platonic!reader

A/N: I’M SO EXCITED THIS IS MY FIRST EVER REQUEST AHHHHH. Thank you so much anon. Ily

Reader is an animagus here. I made her a wolf animagus (since they do exist, but I kept her marauder name as Aspen (or Penny) so really you imagine any animal)

--------------------------------- <3

There was nothing you and James Potter hadn’t done together. Both of your parents were close and that meant that you usually spent time with each other. More often than not, you’d be at his house. At this point you knew his house better than you did yours.

So were you best friends? Hell yeah.

But what came with being best friends since you were in diapers?

By the 3rd year at Hogwarts, you’d fallen head over heels for the boy.

Now 3 years later, though his obsession for Lily had grown, it changed absolutely nothing. You were in love with James Fleamont Potter.

The rest of the marauders knew. But somehow, James was absolutely oblivious.

But this year would be different. You would confess. You promised yourself.

But now it’s February and you’d done nothing.

“Are you even going to ask him out n/n?” Sirius asked as you both ran to your class. As usual you were too busy pranking the Slytherins to realize that the next class had started.

“Of course I am Black! Patience is a virtue.” You both came to a halting stop in front of your DADA class, straightening out your robes.

“If he doesn’t accept, you know who to contact love,” Sirius said, fixing his hair. You shot him a look. “Way to be a supportive friend, Padfoot.”

He shrugged before stepping into the class.

“Mr. Black! Ms. L/N! Get to your seats,” your professor ordered. He was too accustomed to this by now. You ducked your head taking your seat behind James and next to Remus.

“What was it this time?” Remus whispered, eyes narrowed. Sirius turned back, a huge grin on his face. “Something special for Snivellus,” he sneered, earning a slap on the head from you. “Oh shut up! We didn’t bother Snape. We did however ensure Malfoy wakes up with pink hair tomorrow.” You informed Remus.

This time James turned around, “Bloody brilliant Aspen!” You felt your cheeks heat up before Sirius interjected. “Hey! It was my idea Prongs.”

“WILL THE FOUR OF YOU STAY SILENT FOR ONE CLASS?” your professor yelled, causing the four of you to shut up, not before you and Sirius let out snorts of laughter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By that evening, everyone was talking about the plan the 7th Years had hatched.

Everyone who had a date, and only those who had a date to Valentine’s were being asked to ditch class on the 14th to go to Hogsmeade. The prefects made sure that everyone knew that if anyone didn’t have a date and still tagged along, they’d be reported.

“This is your chance, you know?” Remus whispered once the news had reached the Gryffindor common room. You nodded, gulping thickly as the nervousness took over.

“You know who I’m going to ask?” James asked, eyes lighting up. “Lemme guess Prongs, uhhhhh, i dont know? Lily maybe? As in the Lily you’ve been asking since first year?” Sirius asked, feigning confusion. He was met with a flying cushion to his face as he fell back laughing.

You knew he was right. James was going to ask Lily. And it didn’t help that you’d noticed the way Lily had started paying more attention to him. Remus put his arm around you and Sirius caught your eyes as he got back up. Something flashed in his, but for the first time since you’d met him, you couldn’t comprehend it.

“Who are you gonna ask Pads?” James asked, his homework long forgotten as he stretched out his arms.

Sirius seemed to have been caught-off guard which surprised you. It was normal for him to have a plan weeks before Valentine’s day. Remus, you and Peter would just tag along as James pestered Lily the entire day and Sirius hung out with his date. Except that one time in 4th year when a cute Hufflepuff had asked you out. Though it didn’t last long, even he could see the way you looked at James.

“I-I’m not gonna ask anyone,” he said, glancing over at you. Why did he look at you? Did he think you were going to judge him?

“Well,” Remus said leaning forward, “I’m going to ask a Ravenclaw out. The one that sits next to me in Charms.” The four of you gawked at Remus. “What?!” you asked. He shrugged, “She’s cute, and smart, and I think she likes me.” You leaned back, “Well shit, even Remus has a date now,” you said, throwing your hands up. He swatted your arm, “What’s that s’posed to mean?” You shook your head laughing.

“Well uh- I’m gonna ask out a Hufflepuff,” Peter said, rubbing his hands together. Your jaw dropped. “That makes it official. Penny, you and I are gonna be left behind to study,” Sirius gagged. “Does that mean you think I have a chance, Pads?” James asked, smirking.

Sirius shrugged, “Honestly? I’d say this year? You do,” Nodding towards where Lily was sitting. You whipped your head around just in time to see her hair flying as she turned away.

She’d been looking at James.

You covered your face with your hands, leaning into Remus’s side as he gave your shoulder a squeeze.

When you peeked through your fingers, you saw Sirius giving you an apologetic look, and James just staring at Lily, with a start-struck look on his face. You sighed, getting up and grabbing your books. “I’m gonna call it a night,” you mumbled. “You alright love?” Remus asked, concern etched across his face. You gave him a weak smile. “Yeah Remmy, just tired,” you said. You didn’t dare to look back as you wished them all good night.

You hadn’t lied. You were tired. Just not the exhausted kind of tired.

Tired of watching him fall more in love with her.

You lay in your bed, staring at the ceiling. Maybe. Just maybe if you got to him before he asked her out. Maybe.

You clenched your fist, shutting your eyes tight as your roommates walked in, giggling. Someone shushed them. But their whispers were still loud.

“So you’re gonna accept?”

“Maybe, we’ll see.” You felt your eyes watering.

“Dorcas, you owe me a butterbeer.”

“You bet on this?!”

You shut your eyes tighter, the tears rolling down your cheek. Drowning the girls in your room out, you decided you had to get to him first.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Charms was the first class of the day. Also the only one that only you and James had. Sirius, Remus and Peter had a free period, and Lily wasn’t there either.

It was the one time you really got James to yourself.

“You alright n/n? You went to bed early yesterday, and you were quiet at breakfast,” James asked, placing his hand over yours, brows furrowed together in concern.

You nodded, smiling. “Like I said, I was just a bit tired is all,” you replied.

He nodded, taking his hand off, as he went back to playing with his quill.

Goddammit.

You started bouncing your leg up and down, nerves completely taking over you. Would this even work? Would he say yes? Or would it break your friendship forever? You wouldn’t know unless you asked.

You sighed. It was now or never. You cleared your throat before slightly turning to him. “Jamie”

He hummed, scribbling something on a piece of paper.

“About the hogsmeade trip on the 14th-”

“How’s this?” He asked, shoving the piece of paper he’d previously been writing on, into your hands.

You held it in complete shock, eyes wide as it scanned the paper.

It was a poem.

-----------------------------------

Your eyes have got me mesmerized

Your smile keeps me on a high

I know you think I'm arrogant,

Full of myself, a bit too content

But believe me when I say

Your responses make my day

I’m hoping that, I can gather the guts

To ask you out, before you make me go nuts

So today is the day,

I’d like to know if you’d be my date?

On Valentine’s Day?

----------------------------------

It wasn’t perfect. But it was beautiful. Your heart was beating loud against your rib cage.

Was it meant for you?

Your hands were shaking, “I-”

“It’s for Lily, though I think that’s a bit obvious by now.” he laughed nervously.

You froze. Your heart dropped, and suddenly breathing became difficult. You couldn’t think. Couldn’t speak.

How foolish of you.

“So? How is it?” James asked, trying to duck and meet your eyes.

You blinked away the gathering tears, forcing a smile.

You looked up at him, straight into his beautiful hazel eyes. “It’s amazing James. If I were her, I would be absolutely flattered.” You said, your voice shaking slightly.

You willed yourself to hold it together, just until next period. You were free then, and so were Sirius and Remus.

James beamed. “Thanks Y/N.” He took the paper from your hands again, grinning all the while.

You turned back to the front of the class. You couldn’t focus, so instead you closed your eyes, trying to ignore the sting in your chest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The moment you filled your friends in, Remus engulfed you in a hug. You tried not to burst into tears, as he held you tight, rubbing his hand up and down your back, as you clutched onto his sweater. After a few moments he pulled away, reaching into his pocket to grab a few chocolates and handed them to you. You mumbled a thanks before plopping down next to Sirius, who immediately wrapped his arm around your shoulder, and you leaned into him. You’d hugged him before, but for some reason, this felt a little different. You shrugged it off, thinking it had to do with what you’d just felt.

“You still have a few days left n/n,” Remus said, cleaning up his desk, knowing far too well that none of you were going to study now. “He won’t say yes Moony,” you mumbled, wiping away a stray tear.

“Well, you gotta talk over him y’know,” Sirius said. His voice was thick with emotion. Which? You couldn’t tell. Nor did your mind register that fact. Remus watched Sirius carefully, as you opened yet another chocolate to gulp down.

“Won’t listen,” you said, licking the chocolate off of your fingers.

“You gotta make him n/n. Make him see what he’s missing. That someone’s there that loves him. That he’s unnecessarily running behind someone who isn’t giving him a second thought.” Sirius gulped. “Wise words Pads,” Remus said, smiling softly.

You hummed. Oblivious to the conversation both the boys were having with their eyes.

“Alright, I’ll try just twice more,” you declared, sitting up straight, looking at both the boys. Remus gave you an encouraging smile, but Sirius wouldn’t even look at you. Again, filled with emotions of your own, you didn’t think much of it.

You flipped open your books, and started scribbling. You had the entire day left to try. The last day to confirm was the day after, so you had time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Gryffindor common room was often quiet in the afternoon, and it was usually the perfect place for you to get away from the craziness of it all. The silence was comforting more often than not, but today it only allowed your thoughts to grow. You shook it off, trying to enjoy the peace while you could.

The boys could be a handful sometimes.

However, you were surprised when Sirius stepped through the painting. “Hey,” he said softly, dropping his bag onto the couch before sitting in front of you. “Hey?” You responded, confused. He shrugged, before taking out his books and a quill and started writing.

You smiled softly. Him being here surrounded you in a weird sort of comfort. You took advantage of it, trying to focus on your homework.

That was until he came barging into the room.

“Evans just rejected a Ravenclaw! I’d say I’ve got a good chance,” he cheered before plopping down on the couch, arms outstretched. You and Sirius looked at eachother. Yet again, that look was back. The one you couldn’t read.

But just like that it was gone again, a smirk on his lips as he pointed to James with his thumb.

Your eyes widened.

But he was right and you knew it.

“James, I was thinking, for Valentine’s-”

“I should get Lily flowers! I’d love getting a card or flowers, though I think she would prefer roses,” James smiled. “Bloody genius n/n,” he grabbed his bag and just like that he was running out again.

You blinked a few times.

“Did he just- cut me off? A-Again?” You asked, your voice filled with hurt.

Sirius was next to you within seconds. “Well you know what to do now. You get him a card. He can’t cut you off then right?”

You looked at him, the words registering in your mind as you nodded slowly. “Yeah, yeah that’s-” you looked at your books. “You know what? Fuck this,” you shoved all your books into your bag, “I’m gonna get James a card,” you said standing.

“N-now?” Sirius asked, surprised.

You nodded, quickly bending down to kiss his cheek. “Bloody brilliant Siri.” And then you ran out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“James!” you called out running up behind him in the halls, one hand behind your back.

He spun around smiling, wrapping his hand around your shoulders once you reached him.

“Sorry, I’ve been so caught up trying to figure out what to get Evans that we haven’t really hung out,” he said.

You ignored the pang in your chest.

Third time’s the charm.

“Uh- about that James,” you handed him the card, revealing it from behind your back.

He stared at the beautiful handwriting.

You’d just drawn a bunch of hearts and written:

Will you be my Valentine?

In perfect cursive too, which was saying something, because you didn’t know cursive. At all.

He stared at it for a few seconds, your heart beat getting so loud and fast that you were sure he could hear it by now.

But when a grin broke out on his face, you calmed down.

Sirius was a gen-

“You’re the best, best friend ever Y/N!”

What?

“I-”

“This is just what she would like! I owe you a big one!” he said, engulfing you in a hug. Though his body was warm, the hug felt as cold as ice. It felt like someone had ripped your heart open.

Your eyes watered. “No James I-”

“It’s perfect n/n. Thank you,” he said pulling away, eyes scanning the card again.

You felt sick, the tears spilling over.

“I’m gonna give it to her ok? See you later,” he said, running off.

He hadn’t even looked at you.

A sob racked your body, your legs giving in. How was he so goddamn oblivious?

But you never hit the ground.

Strong arms wrapped around you, the smell of honey and cinnamon enveloping you. They lowered you gently to the ground. “I got you love,” he whispered.

Sirius.

You curled into him, sobbing continuously and uncontrollably. You could hear people whispering all around you, but you couldn’t care less. “What is this ruckus?” came a strong feminine voice. “Goodness,” you heard her whisper. You didn’t open your eyes, and yet the tears never stopped flowing. Sirius’s sweater was wet now, and above all else, guilt creeped up on you. Why did you always allow him to pick up the pieces? Plus he liked this sweater a lot and now you were ruining it. You clenched your eyes tighter, trying to let the cinnamon scent calm you down.

“Everyone scram! Go on, get back to your classes!” she yelled.

You fisted Sirius’s sweater, as he ran a hand through your hair. “Mr.Black, take her back to the Gryffindor common room, I believe she requires yours and Mr.Lupin’s attention. You three are excused from classes today,” She said softly.

God bless you Professor McGonagall.

“Thank you Professor,” Sirius responded. He brushed the stray hair from your face. “Love, let’s get you out of here yeah?”

You couldn’t open your mouth, not trusting your voice, so you just nodded, finally opening your eyes. He helped you up, nodding once to your professor as you both walked back to the common room.

His hand never left your shoulders.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were curled up on your bed, staring at your wall blankly, when Sirius came back with Remus. Both the boys’ pockets were full of chocolates, and Sirius was carrying his favorite sweater. The one which was also your favorite sweater. You sat up, taking it from him and slipping it on. James called it your “breakdown” sweater.

The James that would never be yours.

Your eyes overflowed with tears again, and you tugged your knees closer to you.

Remus quietly climbed onto your bed, wrapping his arms around your shaking frame, and Sirius sat at the edge of your bed, watching with concern. You didn’t say anything. Not when Remus excused himself to go keep James busy.

Not when Sirius took Remus’s place, pulling you into him. Not when he took out your favorite novel and started reading.

Not after you started drifting off, when Sirius placed a soft kiss on your forehead, whispering good night and slipping away. Not when everything in you told you to reach out and ask him to stay.

Not when you realized you still had his sweater on, and he hadn’t even asked for it back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were awoken by the smell of butter on toast. And chocolate.

“Remus it’s too early,” you mumbled, burying your face in the pillow.

“Breakfast’s done already. Do you know what kind of excuses Sirius and I had to come up with?” Remus chided, shaking your shoulder gently.

You propped yourself up on your elbows, turning to face him. “I’m sure he didn’t even ask,” you grumbled, pushing the hair out of your face. Remus frowned at that. “Of course he did. Sure he might be a prick for not seeing the obvious but you’re still his best friend. He still cares,” he reached into his pocket, taking out a piece of paper.

“He wanted me to give it to you, since he’s got class,” he held it out to you. You stared at it for a few seconds before slowly taking it from Remus’s hands and sitting up straight.

-------------------------

Hey, hope you’re doing alright? The boys told me you’re down with a bad cold. Sorry I can’t come now, you know how it is with charms yeah? I promise I’ll come meet you as soon as I can.

-------------------------

You huffed, crumpling up the paper. The audacity! Remus shook his head, handing you the tray of food next.

“You’re such a hypocrite,” he mumbled. But you heard him.

“Me?” you asked, shocked. Remus nodded.

“How?”

He shook his head again, laughing slightly. “You’re mad at James for missing the oblivious when you’re doing the same goddamn thing!”

You blinked a few times, before his words settled in and your eyes grew wide. “You like me?”

Remus was taken aback, before he burst out laughing. “No you dummy, I’m talking about Sirius!”

“Ohhhhhhh.” You took a bite of the toast, chewing quietly. Sirius liked you? You felt your chest get heavy, an unfamiliar sensation flooding through you.

Guilt and…hurt? No, it’s like what you felt when you first started liking James.

“I know you love James, but can I offer a solution?” Remus asked you, one eyebrow raised. You nodded slowly unsure of where he was going with this.

“If there is just a tiny place for Sirius in your heart, give him a chance. If not, don't. I don't want to be there to pick up the parts for that mess,” he told you, popping a chocolate into his mouth. “However,” he held up a finger, “If any part of you, over the past year has felt anything romantic for Sirius. Please do ask him out. It’s been difficult taking care of both of you. Peter will drive himself completely, completely mad if Sirius has even one more breakdown.”

“Peter knows?” you asked.

Remus laughed, “Why do you think I called you a hypocrite? It’s kind of obvious.”

Now that you thought about it, it made sense.

All the time he spent with you. The glances from across the room.

And goddammit, the look you couldn’t decipher.

You groaned, “Remmy what’ve I done??”

He shrugged. “Tomorrow’s the deadline. You still have time. While I have a date to fix,” he said with a smirk. You smiled, “Good luck!”

And then you were left alone. You looked at the half eaten toast, and then to your hand, where Sirius’s long sweater was bunched up near the wrist. You sighed. “Oh Siri, you golden-hearted boy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After spending nearly the entire day in your room thinking, you made your way to find Sirius, knowing exactly where he was going to be.

“Sirius Orion Black!” you called out as you barged into his dorm room.

His head whipped around, eyes wide in shock. “It was Remus’s idea!” he yelled.

Your eyebrows knitted together in confusion. “Huh?”

“You’re gonna ask why James thinks you’re sick right? It was Remus’s idea, I just wanted to punch him,” He said, raising his hands up in defense.

“What? No, that’s not why I’m here,” you replied, climbing up onto his bed, sitting in front of him.

“It’s not?”

You shook your head. He had papers and books sprawled out around him. You realized he was catching up on school work, considering he’d missed all the evening classes yesterday. You felt bad, he had sat there comforting you, as you cried over another boy, while he was in love with you.

“I’m thinking you and I should ditch all the classes on the 14th,” You said, playing with the sleeve of your - his sweater. You slipped it off, handing it back to him, ignoring that the feeling of slight comfort which had helped you fall asleep last night was now gone.

He shook his head, “Looks good on you,” he told you, pushing your hand away. You gladly put it back on, the cinnamon smell wrapping around you again. Maybe you weren’t being oblivious to just Sirius’s feelings.

“Anyways, what do you mean?” he asked, running a hand through his hair.

“I mean we should go to Hogsmeade,” you shrugged. You didn’t know how to say it.

“We can’t? We don’t have dates,” he said, narrowing his eyes at you.

Were his eyes always so mesmerizing?

“Yeah I know.” You swallowed, your throat going dry. The feeling in your chest doubled, it was like drowning, and taking a fresh breath of air, at the same time.

He cocked his head to the side. That motion almost always had you laughing, he looked like a child! “You’re not making any sense n/n” he said, brows furrowed together.

You played with his sweater, looking down at your hands. “I-I’m saying we should go to- you know- Hogsmeade. The tw- The two of us. Together.” You looked back up at him, watching his expressions change.

Confusion to realization, then after a solid minute, “Li-Like a date? Are you asking me to be your date on Valentine’s?” he asked. His eyes were shining now, happiness ghosting his features.

You nodded, and he grinned. The biggest, goofiest grin you’d ever seen.

“Yes, I am. And hopefully be my boyfriend too. And I don’t want you to think that you’re a second choice or something, it’s just, I’ve been so blind, to your feelings, a-and mine and I-”

You were cut off, Sirius leaning over all his books, hands cupping your cheeks, as his lips landed on yours.

You froze for a second, before you responded, kissing back with as much passion and force.

When he pulled away, he was still grinning. “I don’t care. I get to call you mine now yeah? And I know you well enough to know that it’s not just to get James back or something.”

You smiled, nodding. He took your hands in his, your heart racing. Who knew even he could make you feel like this? Actually, no. With James it’d been pain, mixed with love. But here it was joy, a pure bliss that took you over from head to toe. “I’m going to go fill out that form right now, and make this official,” he pulled you close, pecking your lips once, before running out of the room. You laughed, your cheeks a bright red.

Who would have thought?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Feb 14th - Valentine’s Day

For the past week James couldn’t decide on an emotion. He was happy that Lily had finally decided to give him a chance. However, every time he saw you and Sirius, a weird feeling crept up into his chest.

He’d felt it before with Lily.

Jealousy.

And it made no sense, because why was he jealous? He should be happy for you.

But he knew why.

You would officially never be his.

Sure, he was pining over Lily. He was in love with her. But he couldn’t deny the feelings he had for you, that he’d harbored all these years.

So as he watched you and Sirius dancing around and giggling, he couldn’t help but feel like he’d lost something.

And while finally being able to call Lily his made him feel amazing, the thought that you were no longer his, felt like a stab in the heart.

“It was always him wasn’t it?” He mumbled to himself as Lily went to speak with Marlene and Dorcas.

“No mate, it wasn’t,” he heard Remus laugh next to him.

“Dammit the hypocrisy is real!” he said, shaking his head.

“What are you talking about?” James asked, still watching you as Sirius picked you up, spinning you around.

“It was always you. Poor Sirius bared the full force of it all, just to make her happy. You ran behind Lily for 6 years, Y/N ran behind you for 3 and Sirius ran behind her for 2. You know she used to say the same thing about you? That it was always going to be Lily?” Remus asked, turning to James.

James felt like he’d been slapped. “What?”

Remus shook his head again, “Oh Merlin, I can’t take this anymore.” And promptly walked off.

James stood there, feeling terrible, as the events of the past two weeks caught up with him. He’d been so invested in Lily, he hadn’t even realized that you were trying to ask him out.

So as he stood there, his own date not far from him, James wished he’d paid a little more attention to you. And though deep in his heart, he knew that you and Sirius and him and Lily, was the pairing that was meant to be, he couldn’t help but wonder what would’ve happened, had he not been so invested in someone who took forever to be his, when you were right there all along.

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