#ugh this is so confusing 😵‍💫

[diona-98]

I'm having some thoughts on making my own oc like not fandom related, yk?

[kuiinncedes]

damn why is my site blocker thing not working LMAO

[kaulitzcumdoll]

🩷Getting high and fucking the twins?? >///< (this was so fun to write)

"Mh..." I muttered something I don't even remember, Tom chuckled and Bill just gave me another drag of the blunt me and him were sharing.

"What was it, doll?" Tom asked with a grin, I looked at him with a faint blush and blown out pupils, Bill cuddled me close as we kept sharing the blunt, feeling it burn our throats from the long drags.

"I think she's not with us anymore" Bill chuckled softly, kissing my forehead and holding me tightly

"I have an idea to get her out of it" Tom said with that sly grin, I looked at Bill confused and hazy, he blushed and kissed my cheek gently

20 Minutes later...

"Ugh fuck...such a slut..." Tom groaned as he held my hips, fucking me roughly from behind, tears rolled down my cute and chubby cheeks as I whined

"You're so pretty, my love...keep going-" Bill panted as he gently held my head, caressing my hair as he whimpered while I sucked his pretty cock, I sobbed and looked up at him with blown out pupils from the highness, they were so different, Bill was so gentle and sweet while Tom was the complete opposite, rough and cocky

"You keep spoiling her with all those praises" Tom said with a grunt to Bill, as if I wasn't there, not that I understood much of what they were saying anyway...

"She's so good though, how could I not praise our love?" Bill asked Tom between small whines and pants while caressing my head, I felt so dizzy from the pleasure and the mixed paces

"Oh fuck...here it comes doll" Tom moaned roughly as he held harshly my hips, making me let out muffled cries and see stars as I felt so good, Bill pulled out of my mouth, I sobbed as he held up my face and quickly jerked off "ah j-ja sweetheart~" Bill cried out as he came on my face, while I sobbed and clenched around Tom as I reached my sweet release.

"Just a little more, baby-" Tom groaned and panted, closing his eyes tightly and throwing his head back, Bill gently praised me while Tom pulled out and came all over my back and ass with a satisfied grunt

"We should do this more often, princess" Bill said softly as we cuddled up "yeah, that was great" Tom chimed in with a grin as he added himself to the cuddled duo "uff..." (😵‍💫) I mumbled completely fucked out "I think she's actually gone now" Tom and Bill (😈/😇) snickered as they held me close.

[niiwa-angel]

Zestial trying to adopt kids as a way to bond with Carmilla over being a parent but it just gets weirder and weirder.

Zestial: Carmilla, old friend! I hath adopted a son!

Sir Pentious: confused snake noises.

Carmilla: ???

Zestial: he hath some pets too. They shall teach him responsibility! I'm so proud!

The Egg Bois: Hello Ma'am!

~over a century later~

Zestial: Carmilla! I hath adopted another child!

Alastor: I am not a child! I am in my thirties!

Zestial, over four hundred years old: They can do so much at that age 💜

Carmilla: Zestial, he's bitting his own arm.

Alastor, trying to chew off his own arm to get away from this situation: chomp chomp chomp

Zestial, forcing him to not do that: he's a little troubled.

~decades later~

Zestial, knocking on the Carmine's front door.

Odette answers.

Zestial: ahh Odette, my Itsy Bitsy, wouldst thou get thine mother for me?

Odette, wanting to see this shit: MOOOOOMMM Zestial got a new kid!!

Carmilla, grabbing a new bottle of wine and heading to the front door.

Zestial: I found a son!

Husk, passed out drunk in Zestial arms: 😴

Carmilla: what the hell?

Zestial: shhhhh. He's sleeping.

~ years later~

Zestial, knocking on the door. Clara answers and sees him standing there with Vaggie.

Zestial: 😁

Clara: 🙄 MOOOOOMMM! Zestial's here! Got a new kid!

Carmilla, from the kitchen: Tell him I'm not home!

Clara: No, trust me! You're gonna wanna see this one!

Carmilla, cursing in Spanish: what?

Zestial: I found her by the trash!

Vaggie, bleeding out and clinging to consciousness by her finger tips: ugh 😵‍💫

Carmilla:

Zestial:😁

Clara:

Carmilla: well, this is the closest you've come so far. Bring her in.

[hyuckswyfe]

seonghwa brainrot 😵‍💫 (sub!hwa)

my demons were screaming at me during this entire live…. don’t mind any errors I was literally SPEED TYPING ts lmaooo

The way I would slut this mf out is crazy, like he’d be on live n I’d just go in the room to check in n hangout, him knowing me oh so well he’s always making sure to bring up the fact he’s live so I could control myself but what he doesn’t know is that’s the whole point… sitting on his lap, chest pressing against one another, my arms wrapped around him and legs tangling on the sides of his chair, placing kisses all over his neck “Remember I’m live” he giggles at the feeling while I try not to fog up his glasses, the comments flooding about how cute we are but if only they knew the reality…

how they think im just resting my head on his shoulder and getting comfortable in my current position but really im whispering all the dirty things I want to do to him and moving slow grinds against the growing friend below me “please not now” Hwa whispers back in hopes his viewers couldn’t hear the whining in his voice, I’d then get up from him and position the camera towards his bed as he ask “what are you doing?” in visible confusion, I’d pull him from his chair and onto the bed sitting him in front of me and locking his legs open with mine, poor Hwa trying to squirm out of the restraint “please don’t do this to me please” he begs looking into the camera with helpless eyes “who wants to help me make Hwa feel good?” I’d ask the growing views of the live stream, comment section filled with agreement and encouragement some even saying they’ve waited for this moment their whole life, I’d smile at the feed back and start playing with my toy..

kissing and lightly biting down on Hwa’s neck and jawline “not now please not now” he’d continuously beg the words he could form still attempting to escape “if you didn’t want this Hwa, then you wouldn’t be as turned on as you are” he and I both knew deep down he wanted this more than anything, being toyed with in front of thousands of viewers at home the feeling of this humiliating situation could make him cum on the spot but he keeps fighting it.. “no no no~” he starts moaning out words as I let my hands slip under his shirt and explore his body, I’d look up at the comments searching for any requests “they want me to take it off Hwa, cmon let’s show your fans this slutty little body of yours” teasing him with these words, slowly unbuttoning the top to his matching silky grey pajama set letting his upper body free, slightly rolling the material off his shoulder and down his arm for more to be exposed.. my hands travel up his body rubbing, flicking and teasing his sensitive nipples “ugh-mmhh~” his moans turn to whimpers as his hips twitch and jolt up in excitement, his eyes getting heavy and soon closing due to the sensation “that’s a good boy… let everybody see your pretty face” grabbing his chin forcing him to face the camera as his features form to a ahegao type look, his brows furrowed, eyes rolling back into his head and tongue sticking out from the pleasure.. soon I’d slowly creep the hand on his chin down to palm the raging problem in his pants, the feeling of the silk going straight thru his boxers and right to his head from the index penetrating his nipple to the palm rubbing over his dick, his head was just filled with how good he felt not caring if he was live or not, he wanted to cum so bad no matter if it was in front of over thousands of viewers enjoying at home, Hwa would start humping my hand like a needy bitch “ah ah.. desperate little thing” moving my hand off his lower half and back to the other bud on his chest “please please m’need cum~” Hwa would mumble throwing his head over my shoulder, moving his hips around in hopes to rub on the smooth material just the right way “why don’t we let our audience get a good look at your pretty parts first?” throwing a glance at the comment section “mh yes mommy~” he’d be so intoxicated with pleasure, his hands gripping down on my thighs for some form of distraction or fidget so he doesn’t get too loud, I’d watch the comments overload at Hwa’s words..

“Did he just say Mommy??? Omg”

“Please tell me smb screen recorded that!! Omg he’s so cute”

I ofc giggled at how weak his fans were before reaching in his pants and taking out that pretty dick of his, seeing the comment section go crazy once again…

“Oh. My. God… it’s so cuteeee”

“I’m never forgetting this moment lord..”

“aww my stupid baby is already dripping” wrapping my hand around Hwa’s length watching the desperate boy thrust into my hand and laughing at it before stroking him on my own, his breath starting to hitch and he can hardly keep up with his words removing my other hand from his numbed out nipple and letting him use those pretty lips to suck on my fingers “mmh feels so m’good” he’d mumble thru his occupied mouth, his body soon telling me he’s close so I’d take my soaked and slimy fingers out his mouth and use them to work on his chest again letting the air hit the side my other hand couldn’t get in the moment, I rub my palm on the tip of him hearing all the wet noises come from it “uh ff~uck yes yes YES-“ Hwa would start getting loud so I use the saliva trenched hand to cover his mouth and suppress any screams from the older boy “mmmh mm mmmhmm” he aggressively nods rolling his hips to match my rhythm before.. a shiver rips thru his body as he cums and it continues to shudder while I overstim him and watch him squirm non stop uncovering his mouth to switch hands and let him taste himself on me, putting a thumb back to work on the attention-less nipple on the left side of his chest letting all his sounds escape from his throat, every last scream and moan had to be heard from throughout the house “please stop stop stop~ mommy please i’ll be such a good boy mommy please” Hwa begs as tears flow down his face like there’s a gun to his head “if you want me to stop then stop bucking up your hips like a horny little slut” I pout speaking with such a sweet voice “please please please m’gon-na~ AUGH- gonna cum~ yes cum cum cum~” he babbles like a mad man with no sense “cum baby, cum for mommy” was all he’d need to hear to explode all over once again “good boy~ such a good boy for us making a mess all over himself” saying us as a reminder to his audience, his light grey smooth silk pajamas didn’t end very clean, stains and wet patches all over his pants the comments will flood with praise and well-dones, Hwa gets up in embarrassment with a hand over his face not even attempting to put his dick away first just wants to get off live “don’t act like you didn’t enjoy cumming for mommy in front of all your little fans” I’d throw a tease at the mess of a boy “m’mommy, need to make mommy feel good” he’d get on his knees rushing to eat me out as a thank you for making him cum so well, I’d give him occasional kicks to his dick just to earn a couple whimpers and get a few laughs, but after all this, I’d take him on a late-night target run to buy him whatever lego set he wants and help him build it when we get back home…

Smb ground me…. I need my phone CONFISCATED 😪

[nateezfics]

So, Hongjoong has done his Balmain shoot and I can only imagine for a partner, he would keep it under wraps that he'd be shirtless, keeping it from you, and getting his hair cut in a way you suggested that you like, not allowing you to watch any of the content and not letting you see his hair, which you'll obviously see at the mawazine concert. But when you go backstage, you're actually escorted back to the hotel by the staff, unable to actually see the boys and congratulate them then.

Obviously, you're confused, and escorted to a staff members room no less. The only thing you've got to entertain you is your phone until one of the staff members comes to get you after an hour or so, and you're taken back to Hongjoong's floor. But you notice that aside from one or two members, who are giggling on their way down stairs after looking at you, no one is on the floor. It's empty of people, and the staff member who led you up here quietly retreats into the elevator once you've made it to the door. You find yourself in almost complete silence, with butterflies in your stomach.

Sliding the card key in the door, you step into the room, shutting the door behind you. Soft music is playing in the background, ambient lighting, a table lined with delicious looking food and wine. You should've known he was up to something. Before you can call out for him, you see him. Standing in the outfit gifted from Balmain, but with the undercut as well, and all you can do is stare at him because he looks like he walked out of a dream or magazine. And he just laughs, (yk which laugh), at the expression on your face before making his way over to make tonight a night you won't ever forget.

(I'm sorry it took so long, I've had to do a lot of chores today and I forgot some stuff about this thought, but here's a good amount to start with I think).

it’s an absolute tragedy tumblr hid the notification for this ☹️ i didn’t even see it until i checked my inbox just a minute ago😭

but anyway. let me get to this 😮‍💨

where…where to start?? this seems like a dream. and i’m assuming the balmain fit you’re talking about is the one he wore for the cosmopolitan shoot, right? the one where he was very much shirtless underneath 😀 ugh god,, imagining him standing in that outfit with an undercut and with that laugh coming from his lips?? 😵‍💫💦 he most certainly is a sight out of a dream, a wet dream to be more specific. the way i’d run to him immediately…that food and wine would be of no concern when there’s a full course meal in the form of kim hongjoong standing right before me. i’d devour him whole; him in balmain, shirtless, and with an undercut?? i’d be insatiable.

he would make a whole special ordeal out of it. the secrecy, the planning, the food, the wine, the music, all of it. he’d definitely make it an unforgettable night; certainly every night with him would be unforgettable. 😩

thank you baby for sending this. 🥹🫶🏻 you don’t have to apologize for anything. i thoroughly enjoyed this; now i’ll be thinking about this all day 😮‍💨

[blueparadis]

i hab decided that i'll turn this writing blog into main & interaction blog, and turn my taglist blog into writing blog ( just sorta rebrand it ) but idk, im still confused.

i wanna start a fresh blog but at the same time the thought of all the work that a baby blog demands gives me so much pain,

[screampied]

sukuna au that we need because i feel like there isnt more of them🙂‍↕️ (there is a lot but i dont cared😔) and i thought you would like the idea of some of them.😙

Punksukuna: like i mean the one that wear black leather jacket and wear a shit ton of jewelry like i or piercings ,i want sukuna to be absolutely rude ass punk sticking his middle finger out, start fights for a reason….. probably, but he Is already overall all of those thing😎,ik When he with us he just a lesser vision of all of those thing but he is still a jerk. But i also feel like he even more of a tease mix with some sassy. and probably a bit worried about some of your shit😞.

sorcerer!sukuna: this one i NEED like sukuna is a bitch 🙂‍↕️ like he wouldnt do any job that isnt a special level cruse because he want to have more fun then killing something so quick. Ugh the idea of sukuna as a sorcerer but what if we were a half cruse like choso🥸 Like the idea of it sorcerer!sukuna x halfcrused!reader. Mhm would he be mean as shit towards us and even almost killing us just to see the fear in our body? would he be liked that 😞 rude at first but later nice?

human/swordmen!sukuna: what do i mean by human sukuna i mean that sukuna is human in the hein era but were considered the queen of cruses i guessing 🧐(he can be my king 😝🤪) and so i feel like sukuna would not fucking play around but were are🤭 and since cruse can also used RCT were in the clear but sukuna would be a skilled swordman like imagine him with sword cuts through his body due to training 😵‍💫.

Teacher!sukuna or professor au: ok if im going to be fr sukuna as a teacher it going to be funny or some most random drama stuff to students, and if we were a teacher or idk a counselor we probably be the one to reassure him that he just need to get to know them the students instead of being ‘a jerk or a rude ass teacher’ as the students proclaim he was😭.but of course he probably one of those sassy teacher that bark back at his students instead of sending them to the principals office he would make sure there doing a quiz 😔and oh if he really pissed the whole class is getting the punishment of having more homework. Honestly sukuna would loves his students all of them but would never said it.and us 🥱

husband!sukuna: (hein sukuna)sukuna as your husband is just fluffy some times sexual and some sad moments too and the reason is because he never thought about loving a person so much as the thought of marry, even so close of caring for a human being, but now that he saw what makes his heart beat with that is not fear, or anger or excitement in battle but it you. The simple stupid thing that you do that makes him yearn for more. And so much that he becomes a fluff bear, you saw him as a human unlike everbody else and honestly he just love it and probably wonders?but i just know that he probably act before thinking 😑and so many time it cause arguments and it make him piss on the thought of you fighting him when he the king of cruse🙄.and i just know it take him longer to understand the difference between him and a human,he a cruse after all. he maybe realized later that not everyone think like him and that fine because he can take care of those who disobey however that was when he didnt thought of our little attempt since he married to you it was like seeing some new and he kinda hate it. It confused him. 😩 he would the cutest thing ever.

gamer!sukuna: being with gamer!sukuna has been good but there one thing you despise and that was your and his money being waste on game and his ass probably breaking the pc or console because of the game he playing 😤( i would be piss about the money but as a someone who plays games i get more piss and would scream😓).

nice!sukuna: nah you really thought sukuna being nice ??!? Him? the king of cruses ever being nice Or remotely kind is just laughable 😭 like no he would not be straight nice to you he just has his so called ‘nice’ way to you🙂‍↕️. That what i think

ALSO I LOVE the name of jelly’ kuna😍😍 like yes im in my sukuna era 😝💅.🪼’kuna and oh my BAD ABOUT THE sukuna height honestly he just be like idk 7’1??? I mean look at his BODY HE DEFINITELY GIVE A TALL MAN WITH ALL THAT muscle 💪 🤭(also if the gammar is bad im sorry 😢)

-🪼

WELL … YOU COOKED🧚🏽‍♀️

oh stop ‘kuna with leather n piercings is making me feel things. punk sukuna save me GAWD. i can totally see him sassy w a lot of attitude. ouuu sorcerer sukuna is rly interesting !!! that’d be rly cool to see 💗💗 i wonder if he’d be less cocky or more cocky 🫢

sukuna as a professor 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ idk but imagining him in a suit is doing smth to me. he’d be such an ass

HUSBAND KUNA :((( oh to be his lover in the heian era, he’d secretly be such a house husband w his s/o 😞 protective ‘n everything. LMAO GAMER KUNA. he’d rage quit at everything. ur so right he’d break literally all his equipment

nuuu ur grammar is fine !!! but ya apparently he’s over seven feet in his true form 👩‍💻 he’d crush me

[ssahotchnerr]

Katie Hi hi hi!! I hope this isn’t weird, but I saw that on some of your asks when talking about songs, a few Lana Del Rey songs were mentioned, and I was like 😏😏.

And now I can’t get the song Burning Desire out of my head 😫😫and thinking about having a crush on Aaron and it gets so bad that he’s the first and last thing in your mind each day. He’s in your dreams haunting you, and it has gotten to the point where only the fantasy of his hands holding your hips down as he rails you into the mattress, with his lips near your ear you can hear his breathy grunts with each thrust, can send you careening over the edge, each time with his name leaving your lips in the darkness of your room.

But it’s not enough because if dream him is this good, real Aaron dick down must be a transcendent experience so you start to wear work clothes that may be a tad too tight hoping to catch his attention. You also go out of your way to do little nice things for him like bring him coffee, or snacks and take the time to chat about not work things with him, because first, it brings that smile that lights up his face because YOU did something for him, and secondly yeah you’re thirsty asf for him but also he deserves some softness and kindness 🥺🥺❤

BUT ANYWAYS BACK TO THIRST THO(ugh)TS. when the team goes out for drinks or whatever, you start to wear things that are a little scandalous and the girls are like “ma’am who are you trying to seduce” and you’re like “no one” as you just stare at Aaron real hard like embarrassingly hard and you can hear giggles from the girls as they are like “sure”. And, and, and, you know it’s not appropriate and he probably doesn’t feel the same way because he’s the stern boss and would probably frown upon boss/subordinate relationships!!!

BUT SURPRISE YOU'RE WRONG BECAUSE HE HAS NOTICED HOW YOUR STARES LINGER ON HIM, THE SUBTLE FLIRTING, THE BRINGING HIM THINGS AND DONT FORGET THE TIGHTER CLOTHES. At first, he is like 🤔🤔? And making sure he isn’t reading into things because he definitely doesn’t want that HR nightmare for either one of you (he drinks that respect women juice). But after a while, as your little subtle gestures become less subtle and he can clearly tell what you’re up to he is like well as long as you're okay with it 😏😏??

So after one of the team outings, as everyone is leaving, Aaron lingers behind with you and just compliments how pretty and fitting your outfit looked tonight (and on the other nights) And you’re like :) :) :)? Because did you hear him wrong? And he can see the confusion on your face and he is like I mean it :) the outfit is very flattering and he places a hand on your forearm giving it a little squeeze along with giving you the look™. And in your head you’re like I’m about to bust because those hands that you have dreamed of are on you and your brain is filled with unholy thoughts, but outside your like 👉👈 thank you I’ve been trying some new things out and I’m glad it’s working it seems?

And he just smiles at you with that fucking dimpled smile and is like ‘it is working, and I would like to see more of it.’ And then he just squeezes your arm again softly, gives you a little wink, and leaves you with your mouth hanging open. Because number one, your dreams about this man are about to be top tier tonight but number two, you might get that desire that’s been burning you up quenched sooner than later :)

Alright, I’m done I’m sorry for my long ’i want Hotch to dick me down’ ted talk🥴🥴🥴. Time to go lay down and think thirsty thoughts.

minors dni

PLEASE AH okay so you've always been attracted and drawn to him, ever since the day you met him, but you never really surrendered to it. like, it made sense, he's a man of authority and incredibly handsome - having a little puppy love crush on him seems only natural. so again, you really didn't think too much of it nor act upon it.

but then it's game over once you start dreaming about him 😵‍💫

you literally just can't look at him the same way anymore. like after your first sexy dream about him hehe >:) you avoid eye contact with him the whole following day because you're so flustered and you know if you look at him, the only thing you'll be able to picture is him pounding into you <3 hehe you're in a briefing, looking at anything and everything that isn't him, he notices and asks you if you're okay. you have no other choice but to look at him, your mind immediately flashes with memories from your dreams and you're blushing profusely. you just nod, keeping your mouth shut because you have no idea what'll accidentally escape you if you do open it.

but the more dreams you have, that changes the game completely hehe >:) he's your last thought before you fall asleep, your dreams are consumed by him, and he's on your mind the second you wake up in the morning. he's actually all consuming. so you start wearing those tighter clothes, going out of your way to do lil things for him like bring him coffee or make conversation, just anything to be near him because every part of you just needs him; so much longing it's actually painful. like there's a pit of emptiness in you constantly when you're not around him.

and while you think you're kindaaa being subtle throughout, aaron notices the way you look at him. he notices your eyes checking him out and all the lingering stares- especially the ones on his hands or lips <333333 he's always been attracted to you as well, so at first he's convinced he's looking too much into it based on his own personal feelings. but then one day you can't help but compliment the way he looks in his suit, and as you do so, you also can't help but bite your lip ever so slightly <333 and then he's like oh ;). maybe now he can actually pursue this further because he's not alone in this ;)

omg and when you're out to drinks with the team - imagine other guys trying to hit on you (!!!!!!) and aaron is sitting there silently fuming. his own reaction surprises himself, like seeing you with someone who's not him? sure he was never fond of the idea, but actually witnessing it?? that's the last straw right there and it needs to stop. he should be the one making you touching you, making you smile and laugh, and it's driving him crazy that he's not the one getting your attention. like at work, it's clear where your attention is hehe and he's gotten so used to it, so that's the way it should always be. heheh you play along and flirt back with the others, solely to get a reaction out of him and it works. as if his eyes haven't been on you all night, he can't pull his stare away from you and he's not trying very hard to be subtle about it either. so as you're leaving the bar for the night, you can basically feel his front against your back. he's crowding so close to you and it gives every part of you butterflies, especially when he leans in and tell you how flattering your clothes look on you, he can't pull his eyes off of you or maybe he just flat out says you've been driving him crazy all night >:)

at first you're like ??? questioning if this real life or one of your dreams?? but THEN he gives you that dimpled smile, followed by that look, and repeats himself and places his hand on the small of your lower back and you're like YUP this is definitely not a dream it's too way real 😵‍💫😵‍💫 heheh and it doesn't take very long for allllll those dreams to come true <3 and you thought right!!!! the real thing puts all your dreams to shame; it's so much better than anything you could've possibly imagined

also- i literally just associate EVERY lana song with him it's impossible not to 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 and ughghg everything you said was just PERFECT ugh longing and sexual tension with aaron <333 YES PLEASE WHERE DO I SIGN UP

[ohlovxr]

somno with matt!! he can hear every time your breath hitches or your heartbeat speeds up so he can keep you right at that perfect point of turned on but still asleep for as long as he wants 😵‍💫😵‍💫

yes yes yes!! ugh he plans it so you wake up just as he’s burying himself into your pussy and pumping him cum deep into you. you’re all confused, still filled with sleep and unsure if this is reality or a dream, as you feel his balls twitch against sticky clit and his hot weight on top of you :((

[irisxstardust]

1 | Shut Up

SUMMARY: You and Ellie used to be friends until one day when she decided she was done. You hadn't spoken to her since and now, five years later, you are given the unfortunate task of going on patrol with the girl. A little argument and one stalker later, you're playing her hero. But is it enough to repair the damage made to your relationship all those years ago?

A/N: wowzers. ive spent like two weeks going back and forth on this piece bc UGH i want to get into the cutie stuff but i like want that angst and slow burn yk. and i also want it to be good like this is my first real tumblr post and yall are such good writers ive got a lotta standards to meet. ugh pls tell me its not boring i dont want it to be boring since its not fluff. anyway there will be more but im not sure how fast ill be able to write it. i like really dk how many more parts i could make of this ngl like i just wanna make a happy amazing pt 2 where reader and ellie just like live happily ever after. also this is my first time writing in second person so pls give me grace if its bad lmfao. love you🫶🏻

CW: cursing, angst?/slow burn, fem!reader (she/her), CAT (🤮���😵‍💫)

WC: 3,688

You didn’t hate Ellie Williams, not in the slightest.

In fact, when you first met the girl you were impressed by her nonchalant attitude and how quickly she adjusted to life in Jackson. You admired the bond she shared with her companion, Joel - the closeness they shared, the softness of his voice when he spoke to her, the glint in her eyes when she looked at him. That didn’t mean you missed the way she stared off distantly in her free time, or the way she would talk to others with a certain tiredness in her voice; but it wasn’t like you could talk to her about it.

You weren’t friends with her. Well, not anymore.

Ellie and you were friends when she first arrived, you made sure of it. You were always bringing her things to make the adjustment easier: blankets, sweaters, new socks, ammunition, and a new hairbrush, among other things. She was grateful for it at first, always thanking you, hunting you down for movie nights, and inviting you over for dinner with Joel. But at some point you messed up - you did something wrong.

She slowly began to ignore you, she started returning your home-baked goods and stopped inviting you to her house to watch movies. She started to talk to you just as cold as she talked to the others. She didn’t like you anymore.

Eventually, probably tired of your haphazard attempts to fix your friendship, she snapped. You left her house in tears that day with your head down, shoulders hunched and wobbly, trying to cover the tear streaks with your hair.

Ever since you’d tried to ignore her, her words, and the wounds they made. It was hard when she consumed your every waking thought. You thought about Ellie all the time - what you did wrong, the way her hair bounced as she walked, what you said to make her hate you, that one time at dinner she accidentally choked on water and spit it out her nose, the look in her eyes as she yelled in your face, all of the science stuff she had hidden away in every crevice of her room.

Every thought you had about Ellie contradicted the other and it was all so confusing that every time you thought too hard about it your head spun.

So you quickly found yourself doing simple, menial tasks to keep your thoughts at bay. You were picking up every patrol you were allowed, volunteering at the daycare to help your mom care for the kiddos, spending any and all free time at your friends houses instead of yours. You always finished your house chores early in the morning, always walked your neighbors dog once before noon and once after, always doing whatever you could to stay out of your own mind.

So you forgot about Ellie - as best as you could, at least.

It almost worked, too. Five years you got away with it, hiding from your mind and from Ellie. Until today, the one day you had been dreading for years. The day you knew was coming.

You were partnered with Ellie for patrol.

At first, you'd spent the first three hours complaining to your friends - Jesse mostly ignored you, only cracking jokes here or there, and Dina just didn't understand why you hated Ellie so bad. Eventually you just gave in and stopped complaining, finding some solace under the heavy duvet on your bed.

Before Dina left your home she gave you a warm smile and said, "You're gonna do great." And then left you to your own devices, not realizing she was leaving you to rot in your own brain.

When the time came to get up and get ready, you found yourself picking through your clothes, trying to find the cleanest shirt to wear and the pants that fit you the best. You wanted to look nice, most people would, but you weren't sure if it was for you or for her.

You walked nervously towards the stables, taking firm, heavy breaths as you shoved your hands into your jacket pockets.

"It'll be okay... It'll be okay," you chanted the words under your breath as you neared the stables, clenching and unclenching your sweaty fists.

When you arrived, Ellie was already leading Shimmer along to the exit, hardly glancing at you.

"You're late." She said, sucking on her teeth.

You nodded slowly, inhaling sharply, "I am aware..." speaking slowly and cautiously, trying not to poke the bear. "I kind of have my own stuff, though," the pitch of your voice raised slightly, as if you were unsure of your own words, "so I got here as fast as I could."

She scoffed, her head shaking slightly which sends her short strands of hair bouncing around her ears. "Just get the fucking horse."

You walked off hastily, unfurling Japan's reigns - when Dina didn't take him out, you did, because you both liked to make sure he had enough exercise everyday. You walked him down to meet Ellie at the gate.

Ellie was standing on one foot, shifting her weight every now and then and rubbing her palms down the length of her thighs; almost as if she was rubbing something off of them. She rubbed her thumbs on Shimmer's reigns nervously, head darting back and forth to see if you were close or not.

When you came into her line of sight, she hardened up and stood taller. Her face sharpened and her eyes filled with the same distance that kept you up at night, though today they also harbored another emotion, one you were no longer privy with.

It filled you with a sense of confusion and dread, causing you to mumble incoherently under your breath.

"Fucking Williams... cold as shit... pain in my ass..." you muttered as you mounted your horse.

Giving you one last weary look, Ellie also mounted her horse. She pulled her fingers through her hair, tucking it back behind her ear as the two of you left Jackson.

The horses trotted slowly, easily stepping over the tree roots in the ground as if they had the whole route memorized.

For you, this was one of the few routes you hardly visited. It wasn't too far from Jackson, but it was just far enough that you knew it'd take up the rest of your day.

As your eyes danced between the trail ahead of you and Ellie beside you, you didn't know what to think.

Sure, you'd thought of all the ways you would yell at her and all the things you'd say if you ever got the chance again; but you'd also thought of all the ways you'd make it up to her, all the things you wanted to say to let her know you weren't the same person you used to be.

What did it matter, anyway?

You were stuck here, letting your old wounds sit and fester in the bitterness of it all. You were stuck here, next to her but unable to fill the empty silence with words. You were stuck here, on patrol with the one person who hates your guts and you couldn't do anything about it.

"It's not polite to stare, you know."

Her voice echoed through the dense trees, bouncing off branches and leaves only to worm its way back into your brain.

"I'm sorry?" you hummed, caught off guard by the sound.

Her head slightly turned in your direction and Shimmer slowed down to a light trot, matching Japan's speed. "It's not polite to stare."

Her words were much sharper the second time around, with much more emphasis placed upon them.

She's angry. Amazing. You scoffed to yourself, trying to keep hold of your composure.

"I wasn't staring..." you paused. You almost said her name, but the word caught in your throat. "At you. I wasn't staring at you."

She glanced at you sideways before she continued, "you were."

"Was not!"

"Were too."

"I wasn't staring-!"

There it was again. You'd almost said her name, but it got caught in the back of your throat, which left you to haphazardly cut off your sentence and leave her hanging, waiting for it.

She scoffed. "Yes, you were."

You closed your mouth and pressed your lips into a line, "I wasn't fucking staring at you, Williams."

"So you stare at me, deny it when I tell you it's impolite, and then can't even use my name?" She stopped her horse, leaning back in the saddle as she spoke.

And the words get caught in your throat. Your mouth dried as you slowed your own horse.

"I used your name," you whispered, blinking away the wetness in your eyes.

She laughed sourly, pulled on Shimmer's reigns and began to trot ahead of you again.

You sighed at the bitterness brewing in the pit of your stomach. You certainly fucked that up - but was it entirely your fault? Surely some of that had to go to Ellie too - I mean she's the one who broke off your friendship... she's the one who yelled at you for "staring." You weren't staring in the first place... right?

You began to question yourself, yet again, as Ellie spoke up once more.

"You're still staring."

And suddenly it's almost as if you could hear the smirk she had on her face.

"Could you fucking not? Please? I'm just trying to get to the tower and go home alive. I don't want to deal with this bullshit too."

"Stop fucking staring then," she whipped around to face you. "I definitely didn't ask for this either, so stop being a baby and get over it."

You clenched your fists and brought one to your face, rubbing your eyes with your palm.

"I'm not staring at you, El-"

You stopped talking after you finally looked directly into her eyes, catching sight movement behind her.

She began to scoff but suddenly stopped as your face changed.

"What?"

"Shut up."

You tilted your head to the side, narrowing your eyes as you focused on a shadowy figure hidden in the trees.

The figure stilled under a long branch, the leaves creating long shadows which warped around the curves of the figure.

Slowly, you reached for the pistol strapped to your thigh. Ellie's face scrunched in a mix of confusion and worry.

"Don't," you breathed, "move."

At the sound of your sharp exhale the figure screeched and aimed for Ellie, its dark eyes fixated on her.

You brought the gun up, aiming and pulling the trigger as fast as you could, but the stalker was hardly affected by the single bullet.

Ellie whipped around, yelping once before the stalker jumped on her and yanked her off of Shimmer. The stalker pinned her to the ground, its teeth already bared and ready to bite.

You pulled the trigger again. And again. And again. Until eventually the stalker slumped down above Ellie.

She pushed it off and brought herself to her feet, head whipping around to look for others.

"Do you see any more?" you asked as you scanned the area.

She shook her head, "I don't think so... holy shit."

You both sat quietly for a moment as you tried to process what just happened.

"Thanks- thanks for uh, for that," she panted, mounting Shimmer again and looking around, "that was close."

For a moment you were rendered speechless, trying to piece the puzzle back together in your brain before responding. "Yeah... of course," you paused, adding lightly, "s'what friends do." It came out a little mumbled but you knew she heard it.

You didn't keep your eyes on hers long enough to gauge her reaction, but you figured it was one full of something negative. You looked up one last time and caught her eyes, the strangest look on her face, before turning back down and looking away.

"The tower's just up that way," you hesitated, waiting for her to say - or do - something. To do anything. But she didn't, so you continued, "there shouldn't be any more in the area, they just cleared it last week."

You shifted on the saddle, cringing slightly, urging Japan to move forward again.

The rest of your route went okay - you didn't encounter anymore infected and the area is mostly barren anyway so you didn't find anything worthwhile. The tower was cleared already, too, so you and Ellie mostly found solace in your own thoughts for the rest of the route.

She didn't mention the staring thing again, opting to keep quiet instead, but you could feel her eyes meeting the side of your head every now and then.

You didn't say anything to her as you re-entered Jackson, walking side by side to the stables to put the horses back.

Ellie was brushing out Shimmer's mane as she opened her mouth to speak, "hey, thanks for earlier. Seriously. It means a lot."

You nodded, "no worries," and you paused, unsure of what to say next. Before you could, Ellie spoke up again.

"And sorry, by the way," she said, eyes darting around the stables, "for being mean."

At that, you found yourself completely dumbfounded, eyes wide, staring across the stables at her. And before you had the chance to recover from the shock she was flying out of the stables, probably heading back to Joel's house.

Within the next four minutes you'd rushed to Dina's, tripping and stumbling over your own feet, heart pounding and mind racing.

"She apologized?" Dina asked incredulously, eyebrows raised and lips turned downward, "for real?"

You shrugged, "I guess. I can't believe it either."

"Yeah, dude, she hated you for years but you play hero once and now she likes you again?" Jesse laughed, shaking his head, "bullshit."

"I never said she liked me again, Jesse. I was just telling you what happened. She apologized. That's what happened."

"Maybe she realized you aren't that bad," Dina smiled.

"Oh thanks, Dee, I'm honored."

Dina chuckled, leaning towards you and smacking your shoulder playfully, "and it's about time."

You paused, chewing on your lip as you thought of the day's events over and over and over again.

"I hope this is a new beginning for you guys, you deserve it."

You stopped your thinking, pulling yourself out of your thoughts to respond with a smile, "thanks, Dee."

"So, now that that's out of the way," Dina smiled suggestively, narrowing her eyes and raising her eyebrows, "you want to come to the bar with us later? Everyone's gonna be there."

You couldn't miss the suggestive tone in her voice, the way it dropped a pitch and she gained a mischievous glint in her eyes.

You hummed, "are they? Good for them."

Dina sighed exhaustedly, "c'mon! You never come with us! It'll be so much fun, I promise!"

"I don't know, Dina. You know I'm not one for parties."

"Well, you are tonight," she tapped the palm of her hand against the table, "because you are coming with me and we are going to dance all night and have so much fun. So much so, in fact, that you're going to completely forget how much you hate parties!"

"Oh, is that right?" You smiled as you began to chuckle.

She hummed, a particularly big grin splattered on her face.

"Yeah, your new best friend might be there too," Jesse added, which earned a nasty look from you and a disapproving look from Dina.

"Shut up!" Dina shouted, turning her attention to Jesse - which only threw you right back into your own head.

After Dina snapped you out of it, and after a lot more begging and pleading on her part, you agreed. It couldn't be that bad - right?

The party was nothing short of what you'd expected.

It was loud, crammed, kind of smelly, and definitely not the place you wanted to be spending your time.

But every time you caught Dina's eyes or you looked over in her direction, the smile on her face was enough to make you feel so deeply guilty that you stayed put. You stayed with her if she brought you out to dance and you stayed with her if she brought you to the bar to get a new drink.

It wasn't a surprise when you noticed Ellie at the bar, nursing a cold cup, staring at you with a conflicting expression. It also wasn't a surprise when Dina grabbed your hand and started dragging you in her direction, giving you one last reassuring smile.

It was a surprise, however, when Ellie greeted Dina with a hug and you with a smile.

She smiled at you.

Completely unable to quickly recover, you let Dina do the talking, trying to calm your racing heart.

"Hey, El! How're you doing?" she had to shout over the music but you knew Ellie could hear her - everyone could hear Dina.

"Pretty good! You okay?"

They began to exchange pleasantries and all the usual small talk, so you spaced out for a moment, waiting for the moment Dina would pull you away again. That moment didn't come, however, because Dina ran off without you.

"Wait - where's she going?" you yelled, eyes finally meeting Ellie's.

"Said she was gonna grab Jesse," Ellie began, eyes scanning over your outfit. "You want a drink?"

You hesitated, thinking over what happened during patrol. You lost yourself, again, and began mulling over what you could say and how she would possibly respond.

But then you began speaking, your mind not caught up yet.

"Sure!"

Ellie's face relaxed a little, and she waved you over towards a quieter area of the bar. The flannel tucked up to her elbows showcased the way her muscles flexed as she signaled Seth over to your side of the bar.

"You doing okay?" You asked as Seth walked away. "It just... looked like that stalker shook you up a bit."

She nodded, "Yeah, yeah. It was a little," she shrugged and let out a mangled noise, "nerve wracking." You both laughed.

Seth dropped your drink in front of you, giving you a sideways glance before returning to the packed end of the bar.

"You know how it goes, though," she finished. "I'm good."

"Well, that is certainly a plus."

Her lips tugged into a small grin, making you mirror the expression.

"Thanks again, by the way."

"Hey, we were partners. It was my job to have your back."

You both laughed again.

And you fell back into it. Into that easy-going, comfortable rhythm you had with her so many years ago. It was like no time had passed at all; like you were fourteen again.

And even when Dina came back she didn't hide it. You were finally able to openly talk to your two friends together again. It was like a dream.

"Hey, Ellie!" No. "I haven't seen you in forever!" No. "You look so good!" No.

"Oh! Hey, Cat!"

No.

You could almost taste the tension that had suddenly built up around the three of you; the sudden change in the air sending your head reeling and heart pounding.

Ellie and Cat exchanged pleasantries (not like you were interested or anything) as you suddenly honed in on a weirdly shaped ice cube in your drink. Poking at it with your straw, you waited for Cat to leave, holding your breath.

And in less than five minutes, you fell out of it.

You fell out of your rhythm, Ellie already ten beats ahead of you while you seemed to have changed rhythms completely.

When Cat did (finally) leave you let out a shaky breath, watching as even Ellie noticed the shift in you.

"Sorry," she said sheepishly, mostly directing the apology to Dina. She turned to face Dina straight on now, no longer moving her eyes between the two of you.

"You're fine," Dina brushed it off quickly, seemingly unaware of the sudden awkwardness.

"I should uh... go anyway. Joel's waiting for me, so... you know."

"Oh, yeah, sure. We should go soon too," Dina draped an arm around your shoulders, "I have kept someone here for way too long. She's getting a little antsy." She gave you a pointed smile, a teasing tone lacing her voice.

Ellie gave Dina a half-hearted chuckle before standing and hugging her. She gave you a very awkward, sideways, one armed hug before turning around and almost running out of the building.

"You want to go now or wait a little-"

"Can we go, Dina?" you rushed, clenching your eyes shut as you rubbed the balls of your palms into your eyes. "I'm just... really tired."

Dina stared at your face, her eyes scanning yours, for an extra beat before nodding, "Yeah, of course."

At home you spent the rest of your night hiding under your duvet, pulling at large chunks of your hair with your fists, digging your heels into your bed; all the way until you finished the night tiredly blinking away tears and chewing at your lips.

It was all so confusing. One minute you're dreading even looking at her and the next you're talking and laughing with her like you're best friends - and then? Then you're sitting there like the two of you never started talking again at all, all because Ellie said hi to an old friend.

One minute she's talking to you, then the next she's talking to you through Dina.

You woke in the morning with blood dried on your lips and dark bags under your eyes. You found it hard to keep your eyes open as you brushed your teeth, and one look in the mirror showed that you were in no state to leave your home anytime soon.

Your parents left quickly for work, not giving you a second glance even as you asked them to clear your schedule for the day.

Around noon you received a familiar knock at the door, and when you opened it you saw a face that hadn't graced your porch in a few years.

"Hey, Ellie," you paused, panicking internally. "What's up?"

"Do you want to talk?"

[meiloorunsmoothie]

tl5y 🫠, a sparknotes review

okay, round two! similar to the finding neverland post (basically a play by play of my thoughts while i watched), but this time no gifs...cause i'm lazy. i did add song titles though.

enter if you dare ⬇️

still hurting

so it's just occurred to me that i've never actually seen a movie with anna kendrick (minus trolls, i have seen that) (no i haven't seen pitch perfect)

i'm tempted to pause right now and read the letter

shiksa goddess

oh hi jere-OH...

poofy hair :D

see i'm smiling (apparently i had no thoughts during this song)

ack jamie 😬

moving too fast

THE. POOFY. HAIR.

the little jump!

the way she's just watching him while he's walking around the room singing 💀 (honestly same)

ah it's very nice to have visual context along with this song

ASHLEY

ASHLEY

ASHLEY

a part of that

i think i'm starting to understand what he means when he says he's a lot like jamie in real life

"for cathy" oh gosh i feel like this movie's going to really get me

the schmuel song

SCHMUEL

i love anna kendrick's deadpan-ness

why have i never put the two and two together that he's a writer so that's why he tells stories, hence schmuel 💀

NO IT GLITCHED ihavetorewind (rewindsbacktothebeginning)

SCHMUEL

a summer in ohio

betsy wolfe? that's a fun easter egg

OH THAT'S WHERE THAT EYEBROW GIF IS FROM

the next ten minutes

at this point, i've heard "the next ten minutes ago" so many times that i half expected laura osnes' voice to come in during this scene

this is a happy song but i'm sad

a miracle would happen/when you come home to me

oh gosh jamie 😭

okay but this song is a bop

ASHLEY

ASHLEY

ASHLEY

(yeah it's just going to be like this every time she shows up)

jamie...

climbing uphill

hey jason robert brown - how many cameos are in this movie 🤨

oh this is fun (but for real, this is me every time i'm on a stage)

i would like to read this "light out of darkness" book please

wait i'm confused - i thought cathy was telling it backwards. didn't they just get married? why is all going terribly in this song 💀

if i didn't believe in you

oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh

okay i wasn't sure where this was going when it started but...😳💀😭

the acting in the scene >>>, from both of them

i can do better than that

no. i don't want to see this after that.

blew me off with a heartfelt letter...

no don't cut the hair (clearly i prioritize all the right things)

nobody needs to know

ASHLEY...i can't tell if i like that she's the one jamie cheated with 😵‍💫

is this the girl from spiderman: homecoming (my brain is obviously focusing on the important things) (oh it is btw)

conscious, deliberate mistake.........

ack the shiksa goddess callback

goodbye until tomorrow/i could never rescue you

he's very growly in this movie

HIM IN THE BACKGROUND WRITING THE NOTE

ugh jamie. there's nothing to say.

i like the color contrasting in the movie though

oh this is a tragic medley

why is he carrying the suitcase instead of rolling it like a normal person

um. how dare this movie. i'm going to go rewatch finding neverland.

consensus: if you love jeremy jordan, you should watch this movie. also, if you hate jeremy jordan, you should watch this movie.

[daisyvisions]

HI I'VE BEEN SWINGING AROUND THE JUNGLES (of exams) AND ALMOST DIDN'T MAKE OUT- but anyways brain rot time 🤗🤗 (yall better sit tight for this swinging cuz i have a few more up my trees)

smh imagine ur on ur period but both of you and younghoon are so fucking horny u just had to do smth- midst sucking him, u remembered what u saw from porn the other day and decided to try it out.

u immediately froze which made him confuse and about to flip out fr but then suddenly u drool some of ur saliva on ur tits and then spit some on his dick bfr starting to rub urself on him-

and wbk he's quite a sucker for tits (a real man baby>>) so yk how crazy that made him go ✋✋ bed's bout to break from the way he's thrusting roughly on ur body- and the way you'd whine when his tip accidentally hits ur chin once in a while so u try to suck him a bit whenever he thrusts upwards-- SHHEEESSHH REALLY GOT HIM GOING AND GOING----

damn i need a younghoon to try this shit out fr 🥱 btw just thought of this an hour ago while studying. physics really do get physical apparently damn 🫨😵‍💫😵‍💫

- 🦥 (damn i miss this place lol)

OMG YES I AGREE WITH THIS WHOLE SCENARIO 100% BECAUSE IM A FIRM BELIEVER THAT YOUNGHOON IS A TITS GUY HEADCANNON UGH 😩

like the size doesnt matter to him he's just a major lover of boobies and loves sucking on tits. So when you do this to him he'll completely lose his mind and will always beg you for a tit job.

the image of your tits covered in his cum is all he thinks about when he's alone at night fisting himself 🤪

[respitelocklyre]

Just need to vent & write down my thoughts…

[The following was never actually posted and exists only as a draft in Respite's socials]

You know, I rlly thought that moving out of my hometown for college was going to make my life less weird overall, not, like, objectively more bizarre. But, like, out of the frying pan and into the fire, yknow??? Or maybe it's more like just a different kind of frying pan bc idk if this situation is worse but it's definitely weird in a different way.

Like, modified memories and disappearing students??? Why me??? Why us, I guess. It involves this whole party of weirdos after all. Not only are Zanther and Coach's memories fucked, but we checked the yearbook in the library from last year and Don Graves and Suma Trun BOTH were missing!! But not like they never existed, no, Sersh said the book had been tampered with using illusion or, like, transmutation magic? Whatever that means. Ugh. Even more weirdly, Roderick C was in the book and still on campus even though he was one of the three students that we met outside the manor. He didn't seem to remember being at the manor, but 🤷‍♀️

Everyone thinks the cheer squad might be behind this mysterious bs, but at least we don't make our members perform blood magic and sign, like, soul-binding pacts in some weird dark ritual like the business club apparently does 🙄 And that's not even on our radar of stuff to look into, to like give an idea of how weird shit is right now.

I'm way more concerned abt Zanther tbh. Sersh also scanned him for magic and he's been enchanted. She kept talking about a possible modify memory spell. Which would explain a lot, but I'm still sooooo confused by all of this 😵‍💫 We want to try and find the deck of many things again if we can, since its whereabouts might, like, give us some kinda clue. idfk.

At least the dinner with Zanther & everyone went ok. I wish Mire remembered him, they were so cute when they were flustered (lol), but maybe it's for the best bc he's being kind of a downer rn. We keep trying to tell him it's not his fault (minus Thad, ofc, but he's an asshole anyways) but ig it makes sense if he rlly thinks Mire disappeared bc of something he did. Still, what a mood-killer after I tried so hard to get everyone together for a nice dinner with no ulterior motives whatsoever!! He was nice enough to pay tho <3

Oh, ohhh, and I hard-launched Javanesh to the group, which turned out to be a fucking mistake. Not bc of anything he did, ofc- he was rlly sweet and even asked me out on another date to go to the Seelie Market!! but my party decided to invite themselves along to the outing too. Thad was just being a little bitch abt me spilling his drink on him earlier (he deserved it i prommie), but now they're alllll gonna be there. Which, like, whatever. It is an open event, it's not like I'm gonna fucking gatekeep a public night market. At least Willow seemed super excited about it (is excited the right word? She kept staring at the poster, so I guess so?) so I'm glad she's happy! We're just gonna have to find a way to sneak away from the others for a bit, is all 😘

[superbattrash]

So uh. The forth episode um. Honestly it gave me emotional whiplash

Sandy ep4

Okay now you’re just trying to make everything sound creepy to freak out Matty. Leave the poor birb alone, sandy

Oh jeez, how long has it been since this guy’s been out of jail?? I feel sorry for him because he’s so pathetic and polite but I just know he’s gonna fuck shit up

Protocols, right, cool, but did you just call yourself a king?? Kings, gods, endless… many names for you little sandy

Well that’s just creepy, what’s Voldemort doing down here?

A gong. Your door… your cave… your doorbell is a gong.

I wasn’t warned about this episode. Maybe I shouldn’t eat. Oh my pizza’s done!! Yum

His. His name is sq..dear god his parents must’ve hated him. He’s sort of insolent but he’s got a point - it’s not like you have any proof that you’re you, sandy

Please don’t let anything happen to the dog. Please don’t let anything happen to the dog. Don’t let anything happen to the damn dog. Or the woman okay, I like her, she’s really nice. Rosemary, yes, that’s her name, I like rosemary, leave her alone please

Oh no now he’s very much too honest. John, you’re freaking Rosemary out, please stop talking

Aw Matty, I would’ve thought the same thing, don’t worry. Omg, sandy played with an angel, didn’t he, that’s so nice. Great, it’s a trap 🙄 oh it’s not. No it is. Maybe. THIS IS CONFUSING

Now who’s this?? Oh man there is…. A lot to unpack here. Is this why you’re so pouty, sandy? You got your heart broken, you were betrayed?

Oh no, I don’t think I can watch this, I don’t want Susie or Rosemary to get hurt 🥲 Don’t do anything stupid, Rosemary, we do not want him to hurt you, okay, and he probably will, won’t he? Oh my gOD WHAT IS THIS FUCKING EPISODE John is freaking me out with his soft voice :/

Oh Matty talking in 3rd person to get the Tea 🍵😂 sandy actually answers?? Nice. I wasn’t all that far off, although “defied” is a little creepy, Morph.

Matthew’s little wobbly walk, I’m in love with this bird

Ok show me the devil, I’m ready

[caws] yeah me too Matty, me too

I see wings. I see creepy cave but I’m a Batman fan. I get it. Oh. OH!!!! OHH!!!!!! IT’S WIFEY. WIFEY IS THE DEVIL. OH HELL TO THE YEAH

oh they have a maze too? Nice, she’s creepy in a cool way

Look at how Sandy is smiling, he’s so weak for Lucifer, as am I honestly. They’re so tall 😵‍💫🥰

Oh they’re totally taunting him!!!! How very devil of you, Luci. Please tell me you’ll have tea or something later, you seem like you’d make great entertainment

Oh shit, that demon is right tho. He didn’t actually steal it, he just has it now

THAT IS NOT A GOOD DEAL, SANDY, DON’T ACCEPT THE TERMS

He’s choosing Lucifer, isn’t he? Of course he did, great, this is just… great

“Apologies”, my pale ass

God, Christie is just. So tall

DON’T LEAVE THE DOG WITH THE CRAZY MURDERER ROSEMARY WE CANT TRUST HIM but ugh he’s so!!? Stupidly weirdly nice but like. Not. Ya know what I mean??

OH GOD NO THIS WILL GO ALL WRONG, THE POLICE WILL DIE IF THEY TRY TO STOP HIM AAAAAA DON’T LET HER LEAVE WITH HIM WAIT NO DON’T SHOOT HIM!!!!!!!!

I really wanna trust his word here but there’s a dog in the car, man, don’t- oh okay back to Hell, for the love of god, this is. A lot

Matty wants to stay!!! Oh he’s so loyal and he barely even knows sandy 🥺✨ wait are they gonna fight fight? Or do some weird magic dance fight?

What. What is happening? What the fuh

Oh okay well that’s both creepy and weird but I guess it suits the vibes. Reminds me of madam Mim fighting Merlin tho just yaknow fyi

Great, he’s on fire

Be a dream or whatever, come on, think of something, you’re dying over here

YEAH LISTEN TO MATTHEW HE’S SAYING WHAT I’M SAYING, LISTEN TO MATTY

“I am Dream”, come on, you can do it

Oh. Hope. That works too I guess

Lucifer gave you an order you crazy demon, how stupid are you??

You better say thank you, that’s good, you should be polite, even in Hell. Hm, this is like the battle of the two most polite weirdos

Oh you almost made them cry, sandy, what the fuck

They’re. They’re not friends? I thought they’d be like. Teasing, taunting friends. That is so not it, okay, my bad, I didn’t read that right

That is such a motorcycle jacket

Matthew asking the real questions, because yeah, he looks like a weird kind of ant in that thing

Are you there before John??? Oh okay, I didn’t think you’d get there first

Oh FUCK OUCH never mind then

You can GO, Rosemary, drive AWAY, COME ON

How do you even alter a ruby, least of all Dream’s ruby?? I’m not trying to be mean but that sounds a little weird

Even John doesn’t get why you haven’t driven off yet WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE???? He’s. He’s?? Giving her the??? The thing??? This is. This is so confusing but yay Rosemary and Susie both survive

[hotdamnhunnam]

Don’t mind me, I’m just here to carry on with the Laur love tour! 💗

I’ve honestly loved going back through our messages and revisiting all of these praises I poured on your beautiful fics back while I was still a ghost girl 👻 It feels so much better to blast them out into the world! You deserve all of this and more!! 🥹✨

Here were the gushings (not sure if I’ve ever actually used the word ‘gushings’ before 🤣) I sent on Part 4! 💦

………………………………

GURRLLL YOU DID IT AGAIN!!! 6.7k words of pure perfection ✨

Rereading it now right after I just finished it so that I can rant to you about some of my favorite things! 😁

UGHH I DIE FOR THESE VIVID DESCRIPTIONS 🤩 I can see (/feel/smell/taste) everything sooo clearly and it’s freaking exquisite!!!! Especially this shit – “the sticky mess left behind from earlier clinging to his lower abs and tangling in his pubes” 🌾🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 AND THIS – “the moon highlighting the perfect curve of his ass and capturing the soft fuzz covering it” 🌙🍑

I love how the vibe of this chapter is so soft and slow and intimate! It’s a really nice contrast against the (mostly) hardcore fast-paced feral energy of Part 3. You write both types of scenes so beautifully 😻 And I love the alternating insights into reader’s perspective as well as Will’s, like, they’re in SO DEEP for each other already and it’s fucking lovely 🥹💘 The little things like how she folds the sweaty gym clothes carefully, figuring he’ll appreciate it and then later in the chapter HE CHECKS THE INSTRUCTIONS BEFORE DOING HER LAUNDRYYY 😭😭😭 That shit seriously fucked with me 💀 It’s SO Will to be so caring and attentive and to go about it quietly and subtly, ugh you write his character perfectly!! 💖

Ok back to reading… OMG THESE IMAGES THAT YOU INCLUDED!!! 🔥🔥🔥 They were such sweet little surprises and you picked such good shots in which Jax/Arthur could easily be imagined as Ironhead instead 🙃

THIS LINE. IT’S DIVINE – “You couldn't care less, hoping he would burn the skin right off of you and steal your last breath if it meant him continuing on like this” – and it reminds me of that same kind of intensely hyperbolic line that I used to love writing in Sir fics of mine (though honestly, when it cums to a sex god like him is it even hyperbole?? 🤷🏻‍♀️)

“forcing you down onto him so your clit rubbed on his golden pubes” – plz just kill me 🌾🫠

The way you write climaxing/cumming scenes is hot as FUCK. Also HIS DIRTY TALK 😵‍💫🌋

THAT SHOWER SCENE!! I swear I could *hear* all that squelching and it was OBSCENE. 💦🚿 In the absolute best way of course. Ughhh it’s so hot it hurts 🥵

And then I love how you wrote their interactions here with the moments of confusion and worry, amidst all of the smut there are some very relatable and realistically depicted emotions in this story! It’s really heartwarming how they’re being so understanding of each other, both eager to take things farther, but careful not to suffocate or smother (never mind that he can smother me any day beneath the full weight of his body in all its sweaty glory…)

That little moment of her worshipfully kissing him melted my heart!! 🥲💓 And I love the reference to him as a “work of art” – in part because that’s actually the title of one of my Arthur fics which as you might imagine is all about worshiping every inch of Art’s body. More proof that we’re twins honestly! 👯‍♀️

I’m obsessed with the protein pancake thing, and the Benny texting, and you already know how I feel about the washing instruction checking, AND THEN THE ENDING?!?!? 🤯

Consider me DEAD. 🪦

Part 4 has officially given me even more reason for this to be my favorite fic I’ve ever read!! 💗

Breathe

Part 4

Pairing: Will 'Ironhead' Miller x female reader

Words: 6.7k

Warnings: Rated E, 18+. Swearing. Nightmare and anxiety attack. Unprotected intercourse. It's very, very sweaty 💦💦💦

Summary: You stay for an eventful night with Will, helping him through an anxiety attack brought on by a nightmare, all while learning more about each other and taking advantage of his amplified energy and restlessness.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

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The room was completely dark aside from the faint glow of silvery moonlight shining in through the blinds, allowing you to see some of the things that occupied it, although your sleepy gaze was focused on Will.

It was unclear what had woken you up; the feel of a heavy body cast across yours that you weren't used to, the foreign sounds of a different house creaking as it settled into the subtly cooler temperature of the night, or simply every part of you rousing to tell you it needed more of him.

You were sure you wouldn't have fallen asleep if your body wasn't so exhausted, your mind buzzing from everything that had happened in the span of a few hours and what was meant to be a typical night at the gym, and although you knew you needed more sleep, there was no way it would come back to you now.

Feeling half-tempted to reach for Will's arm to check the time on his black watch still secured around his wrist, you decided against it, not wanting to wake him when he seemed so peaceful on top of you. To be honest, you would vow to never sleep again if it meant for nights like this, and you prayed there would be plenty of opportunities with him so that you wouldn't feel the need to stay awake in order to make the most of what time you were sure you did have.

You tried not to think of all the 'what if's' and questions about what this was or what it could be, but part of your mind couldn't help but remind you of the reality that Will likely wasn't ready to jump into another relationship any time soon, making you wonder what his earlier confessions of going all-in included.

Were you even ready to consider any form of relationship if that was what it turned into? Knowing Will came with some emotional baggage, could you put your heart at risk of being whisked away so easily while hanging on in anticipation of it being broken?

Will stirred slightly, his muscles twitching as he dreamt, his brow knitted tightly together while his breaths grew shallower and quicker.

Yes, you told yourself, smoothing your hands across his broad back, hoping to grant him some relief from whatever was going through his afflicted mind.

Terrified as you were to let yourself become so vulnerable, you also felt a sense of excitement at what was to come, your heart, body and mind all tingling in tandem that maybe you and Will would trust each other enough to explore everything possible together.

Your fingers idly traced patterns over his shoulder and at the nape of his neck, catching in his golden hair as you did your best to calm your own breathing, letting your eyes close in the process.

Somehow in the midst of your racing thoughts, you managed to succumb to sleep again, your body winning the war in prioritizing the exquisite comfort of Will's warmth and embrace over your restless psyche.

Will slowly blinked into awareness, differing from all the times he startled awake from a nightmare or the sensation of his sweat soaking his bedding until it became too uncomfortable to tolerate, a sigh of relief passing his lips the second he registered the cause for his rare, restful sleep. A weak smile formed on his lips, seeing you sleeping beneath him, your chest rising and falling in a calm rhythm at his sightline as he lifted his head up off your stomach.

He grunted quietly as he shifted, worried he would no doubt have made your legs fall asleep from the weight of his body trapping them for so long, the sticky mess left behind from earlier clinging to his lower abs and tangling in his pubes while the same coated all between your legs.

Christ, he needed to shower.

His skin was tacky, the sheets below you that remained undisturbed too hot to be under, the humidity from outside creeping into the house even though the temperature had dropped since the sun had disappeared. His workout alone had warranted a shower, and now with two rounds of intense sex on top of it, he was hardly able to handle the smell of himself. Had you been awake, he would've suggested taking a cool one together, but seeing as you were still sound asleep he moved to lay beside you, resting on his side so his front was facing you and helped guide you onto your own side where your bum nestled comfortably against his cock.

Will wrapped his arm around your middle, pulling you closer to him, a lazy smile dressing his lips when you reciprocated by holding onto it with your hands. He buried his face in your neck; Fuck, do you ever smell good, he thought, no longer wanting to shower with you in fear your scent would be replaced by whatever body wash he had on the shelf.

A quiet hum passed your lips as you settled against him even more, warranting a kiss on your neck, and then another, and as he covered even more of your body with his, nudging your legs apart for one of his thighs to nestle between, he thought how a shower could never trump this.

The sound of a door closing somewhere in the house startled you awake, unused to hearing it and always fearing you would since you lived alone, but quickly found calm again in feeling Will's body still draped over yours, only on your back this time, making you smile at having found such a comfortable position in your sleep.

Your mouth felt dry, and you tallied how little water you had actually drank that day, remembering you hadn't had any after your workout on account of the distraction sleeping on top of you.

Able to see the time on Will's watch, you decided it best you get up to get a drink, fearing you would lay there thinking about how thirsty you were for hours since dawn was still a few away.

Will only stirred slightly after you slipped carefully out of his hold, leaving him sprawled out on top of the covers, taking a moment to admire how even in his sleep his limbs and especially his ass were still perfectly shaped.

With one glance around the room you remembered your gym clothes had been left discarded somewhere in the front of the house, and you weren't about to trot naked through the Miller's residence with Benny home.

As quietly as possible, you pulled open the top drawer of the wood dresser against the wall, finding it full of precisely folded t-shirts just as you hoped you would. You slipped one over your head, inhaling the smell of his detergent that somehow smelt fresher than yours ever did, now in need to find something to cover your lower half.

The next drawer over kept his boxers - again, with each piece neatly stacked - and you chose one of many navy blue pairs to slip your legs into.

Checking again to make sure Will was still asleep, you opened the door and walked down the hallway, following the sound of the tv coming from the living room.

It didn't surprise you that Benny had sharp hearing, having immediately looked over as you approached, watching his face change from confusion to amusement.

"Hello," he drawled, trailing out the word longer than it needed to be before taking a sip of the beer he held in his hand.

You gave a slightly awkward wave, suddenly feeling coy, before opening your mouth to back up your reason for walking around in his brother's underwear.

"I just need a drink," you explained.

"Help yourself," he permitted, glancing back at the MMA fight on the tv. You skirted around the couch, moving into the kitchen that had a partial wall separating the two rooms, allowing you to still have a view of where Benny sat as well as the tv.

His arm rested casually over the back of the couch, his eyes fixed on the screen as you opened a few cupboards in search of a glass.

"Far right," he advised, knowing you were struggling in your task without needing to look.

"Thanks."

Filling up the glass and downing it quickly, you glanced around, taking in the slightly outdated, but well-kept and tidy kitchen, beginning to feel guilty that you had made a mess of the entryway by leaving your sweaty, sex-stained clothes strewn about.

After refilling it, you started walking back through, taking another sip as you passed by behind the couch.

"Looks like you two had fun," Benny quipped, disguising his grin with his beer as you nearly choked and spit out your water. "Where's Will?" he asked, saving you from having to respond to his friendly jab.

"Sleeping," you answered, pausing in getting back to his room.

"Really?" he glanced over his shoulder at you, quizzically.

You nod and give a slight shrug, unsure why he seemed so shocked.

"You must've really done a number on him," he said slyly, his eyebrows raising on his head and his blue eyes strikingly similar to his brother's with how they held a playful glint in them, his grin nearly glowing in the light from the tv.

"Why do you say that?"

"Will doesn't sleep all that much."

Benny was so matter-of-fact in his statement, making you pause even longer than you intended to. He held your gaze, one side of his mouth turning upward in a smile that you thought might be in thanks before he turned back to the fight and put the can back up to his lips.

You forced your feet to move, hesitating for a moment again when you heard Benny's loose voice sound out again.

"Get some sleep."

His comment held some implication, and you matched his chuckle, continuing on your way and stooping to pick up both yours and Will's mess of sweaty gym clothes as you went, feeling your heart beating a little faster in hopes you would find Will still sound asleep.

You smiled when you opened the door to see him in the exact position as when you had left, flat out on his stomach with one leg hooked up, the moon highlighting the perfect curve of his ass and capturing the soft fuzz covering it, turning the tousled hair on his head silvery. Without sound, you carefully folded and placed your clothes on top of the dresser, gathering from how well the rest of the house was kept that he would appreciate the gesture, and slowly slipped back on top of the covers beside him.

Without missing a beat, Will draped his arm over your waist and pulled you into him, his leg falling heavily on yours to keep you there, his torso once again covering your back like a shield. The steadiness of his breathing helped settle you back to the same level of comfort you had experienced prior to getting up, making you close your eyes with the hope morning didn't come too soon.

He knew it would happen despite how much he prayed it wouldn't; the feverish temperature of his crawling skin making him jar awake, his breathing sharp and laboured as he struggled to get air into his lungs quickly enough, the sheets sticking to him uncomfortably. Will bolted upright, swinging his legs over the side of the bed where he hung his head between his legs, running a hand over his forehead to collect the unbelievable amount of sweat that made it seem like someone had dumped water over him and flicked it down onto the floor.

He didn't flinch when he felt the mattress dip and your hand rest on his shoulder that managed to be burning hot and freezing cold all at once, sighing a shaky exhale in frustration that he'd woken you up and you were seeing him like this.

"I'm okay," he grumbled, clenching his teeth to try to feign away the flourishing panic attack; its persistence as steady as ever.

His hands gripped the edge of the bed so hard his arms shook, his inhales quickly turning into wheezes as he lost the battle against calming them, the sweet sound of your voice gently urging him to breathe like a distant echo in his ringing ears.

Even with his eyes open he couldn't focus on any single thing; the floor beneath his feet blurry, the visions of what had woken him up in the first place swirling about like the begrudging nightmare they always were.

"Will, look at me," you spoke, your words firm and coming in a little more clearly to him. You cupped his face and forced his head toward you, moving to kneel beside him, the sight of you in one of his t-shirts and pair of boxers confusing him and helping to bring him out of his head for a second.

"Breathe," you requested, exaggerating your own inhale with your lips puckered slightly, his eyes drawn to your chest that rose as it inflated. You exhaled slowly, and like he was participating in a fucking lamaze or yoga class, he mimicked you, the pain in his chest deminishing with each series of breaths.

He had never come down from a nightmare followed by a panic attack so quickly before, amazed at your ability to help without hesitation, his eyes finally able to focus on your face and the look of concern and understanding it held. Grabbing under your thighs, Will pulled you onto his lap, looking up at you wearily, but appreciatively.

"Thank you," he whispered, resting his nose against your collarbone through his shirt.

“Of course,” you assured, wrapping your arms around him once you knew it was okay to, feeling his tensed muscles flex as they attempted to relax the strain held in them.

In all the years Will had suffered these panic attacks and nightmares, no one but Benny or one of the guys ever comforted him as easily as this. His lips moved against the cotton covering your skin as he recalled all the times his ex would leave the bed in a huff and go sleep on the couch, upset with him for disrupting her sleep for yet another night, resulting in a blow up in the morning that he eventually couldn't see the value in taking the energy to fix.

The steadiness of your hands rubbing all along his slippery back held just the right amount of pressure to help him focus on that rather than the grief in his head, your respect in not asking if he was okay or what had triggered it making him feel inclined to share it with you anyway. The stark difference in how you didn't shy away or grimace as you carefully touched your lips to his sweat coated forehead compared to how his ex would immediately tear the drenched sheets off the bed was enough to make his heart warm and swell rather than increase its pounding speed that racked the top of his rib cage; her reaction causing his anxiety to climb rapidly as if he had any control over how his body responded to the terrors his mind provided while he slept.

Even if this was the one and only time he had you to see him through a nightmare, Will knew he would hold onto this comforting feeling as long as he could to help him through the ones that would inevitably come in the future.

He sighed deeply, his breath coming out hot against your chest as he held his face directly on it, inhaling the scent of your skin more so than his laundry detergent when he drew in another long, slow breath, the sound of your heartbeat now louder to him than his own. Rubbing his nose back and forth a couple of times before lifting his head from the asylum of your body, he looked up at you and smiled easily, seeing the worry on your face disappear.

"When did you put this on?" he asked, his fingers plucking the excess material of his shirt from the center of your chest.

You smiled back, a sense of relief in your voice. "I got up to get water a little while ago."

Will looked over at his nightstand, seeing a half-full glass sitting on a folded tissue, making him aware of how dry his mouth felt.

You leaned over and grabbed it, holding it between you for him to take where he downed it quickly, and lost in awe of him, you reached out and let your fingers trail down his neck where his Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed.

"Do you need more?" you asked, allowing your hand to rest on his chest.

"I'm okay," he said simply, extending his long arm to place the empty glass back on the table. He looked at you seriously, his blue eyes full of emotion, making you wonder just how much hurt lay beneath them, his gaze falling to your lips as his head tilted to the side. "What I do need is you."

He swallowed your small gasp of surprise when his mouth slotted with yours, his tongue delving into your mouth in a gentle, but confident demand. You arched into him as his hands carded up your back and beneath his shirt, the heat from his palms radiating onto your tacky skin, the sensation making you deepen the kiss and roll your hips on his bare lap. Growing quickly from your touch, his cock pressed up against your core, allowing the thin material of his boxers separating you to rub against your refreshed wetness.

You moaned into him, losing yourself in that craveable sensation, your hands moving more desperately on each other at the same time breathing became an afterthought.

Will whisked his shirt off of you, capturing your lips again to resume where he had left off, his beard feeling scratchier now on your chin that was already raw from too many aggressive passes of it. You couldn't care less, hoping he would burn the skin right off of you and steal your last breath if it meant him continuing on like this, his eagerness to taste you like a drug you would let consume you.

You reluctantly removed yourself from his lap, needing to feel his wanting flesh against yours, hurriedly peeling his boxers down your legs while maintaining the movement of your lips on each other. Strong hands gripped around your legs and guided you back onto him, your cry breaking the seal of your kiss as he seated you down on his length.

Will's chest rumbled beneath your palms as he growled in restraint before beginning to move his hips upward into you, feeling the strong muscles in his quads strain under your bum as he used them to power his thrusts. One of his arms supported him on the mattress while the other wrapped securely around your back, keeping you as close to him as possible and aiding in forcing you down onto him so your clit rubbed on his golden pubes.

Everything had you building up so quickly; the feel of his lips on your neck, his hand gripping you tightly, his cock berating your pussy that took him like it had already committed every inch of him to muscle memory, your body submitting to his every touch that made you almost feel weak for not being able to hold out longer before you were clenching around him.

"Will…" you whined, attempting to steady and slow yourself by bouncing up and down off of him instead of grinding, only to result in him bucking up into you harder to coax out what you tried to delay.

"That's it, come for me," he panted, putting out even more energy into ending you.

The way his voice spoke those words made you stop all efforts in preventing yourself from coming, finally giving in and letting your body sit heavily on his, riding him hard until that blinding, white heat barrelled through you and took control over every nerve in your body and your orgasm racked through you like electricity.

"Fuck, don't stop," he shouted, the roughness of his tone and the way he clawed at your back with his hand and nipped at your neck and shoulder signalling he was close to filling you up again. You didn't dare disobey him, desperate to feel him spill inside your walls, exhausting all your efforts to prevail in riding him until he told you you could stop.

"Keep going, baby - Fuck!" His growling demand and increase in pace threw you into a second climax, the feel of his cum slipping out of your tingling pussy and lubricating your swollen clit making you scream through it as he remained unrelenting in his fucking of you.

Still pulsing inside you, Will grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you to his mouth, roughly claiming yours and stealing your air before you were able to take another panting breath.

Your rocking movements eventually slowed to nothing despite your kisses increasing in fervor, instead squeezing him in a torturous rhythm that had him tug at your bottom lip with his teeth as he pulled away.

"We need to shower," he stated, his eyebrows rising on his forehead as he looked up at you.

You giggled softly, "Hmm, yeah I think so," your hands slipping over his skin that was coated in another layer of sweat on top of all the other ones that had barely dried.

Staying inside you, Will wrapped his arms around your body and stood, holding onto you securely as he moved through the room, your head resting on his shoulder with your arms locked around his neck and legs snaked around his torso like a vice.

As you entered the bathroom, you could feel him begin to slip from you, and noticing the same, Will shifted and pushed you closer to his body to try to keep himself locked inside.

Reaching in the shower to flick on the taps, he wasted no time in stepping in, not bothering to wait for warm water to make its way out of the showerhead, using his body as a barrier as he placed himself between you and the water.

It came as a shock when you didn't hear a sizzling sound when the cool water hit his back that was still aflame, the blatant relief he felt from it coming out in a long sigh as he let his head tip back into the stream.

Realizing he was out of you now, you let your toes hit the floor of the shower, barely trusting yourself to stand on your shaky legs, admiring the relaxed expression on the face of the worn man in front of you.

Feeling his cum seep out of you and down your thigh and not caring to do anything about it, you reached for the bottle of shampoo on the ledge and squeezed some out in your palm, rubbing your hands together before lifting them up to lather it into his blond hair that was now darkened by the water and laying flat against his head.

After a few minutes of indulging in your nails running back and forth across his scalp, Will did the same for you, his blue eyes alight and vibrant again as he watched your skin react in a fury of goosebumps while suds rolled down your body.

Even though he was working on treating you, you couldn't stop touching him, roaming all across his porcelain skin languidly, your hands on him making him feel as if he hadn't had enough already, his veins still coursing with a lingering adrenaline that only seemed to grow the more your bodies contacted.

When he was finished washing your hair, he stepped behind you, pressing his body up against your backside to urge you forward into the water so your face came out on the other side of the stream and your hair was in direct line with it. His fingers carefully ran through your tresses to rinse the shampoo out, watching intently to your body's response to his caressess, your head leaning into his hands heavily as you tipped it to the side, letting the water fall onto your neck and shoulder where his gaze followed the rivers down your breasts.

Unable to resist, he attached his lips to the column of your neck, licking and sucking at your skin that still held a remnant of salt, his hands sliding down your sides to distribute the soap all over your body.

Peeling his hands off of you before he wouldn't be able to, Will grabbed the body wash and dispensed some in his hand, roughly lathering it all over his front and around his cock before pressing up against your back once more. He groped at you again, sliding his body up and down against yours, the way the soap made your ass slick making it difficult for him to keep a leisurely, controlled pace and not simply ram into you and start fucking you mercilessly. He was hard again instantly, his dick too easy to fall between your cheeks and threaten to slip into one of your holes, his freshly settled heart rate increasing rapidly and sending blood pulsing to his head that rubbed all along your soapy flesh.

Will growled against your shoulder, pressing wet, open-mouthed kisses over to your neck, his hands alternating between squeezing at your hips and ass and up to your tits, pinching your nipples to make you moan and arch back into him. He felt wild, unable to focus less now than he had through his panic attack, his only mission to see how much your screams would echo in the noise of the shower.

Fueled by that thought and the way you ground your ass against his aching cock, he let his hand travel down between your legs, driving his index finger as far as it could inside you before adding his middle finger too, pumping them in and out only a couple of times until you were writhing against him, your head thrown back to rest on his shoulder. He knew you would be over-stimulated, your tight pussy already having taken a beating three times from him now, but the Captain in him was set on testing your limits. His fingers moved from between your folds up to your clit, harshly pressing on it as he stroked the swollen bud with brisk motions, causing you to shudder involuntarily and him to chuckle beside your ear.

"You gonna be okay, baby?" he asked, the tone of his voice betraying the genuinity of care in his question.

Your quick nod and the way you ground down onto his hand gave him all the permission needed to continue, and putting use to all the buzzing energy still going through his system, Will removed his hand from you and spread your cheeks apart, slamming into you in one brutal go. Adrenaline fed his pace, his thrusts quick and purposeful as he dragged his length in and out of your tight walls so forcefully he knew he would be making you sore, your wails of unhinged pleasure encouraging him to sink further into the space in his mind where he saw nothing but red.

Despite his barbaric treatment, you took him so well, begging him for more, your sweet voice calling for him to go harder while your body fit and molded to his like a missing piece, accepting each blow so well.

Sending him into a tailspin, you grabbed his hand that was tearing at the flesh of your breast and guided it down so his fingertips settled on your clit again, instantly making you rock your hips more to take even more pleasure from him, allowing him to feel your climax build as you clenched around him like a vice. He worked even harder, fucking through your tight pussy to reach your deepest point and back out again, his assault only progressing as he became intoxicated by your screams and the squelching sounds from both the water on your skin and his cock ramming into your soaked cunt.

Using what remained of the energy he had pent up from his anxiety attack, Will pulled out of you and turned you around, lifting you up and wrapping your legs around his waist, his cock driving back into you as he pressed your back against the shower wall. He was desperate to kiss you, needing to feel your lips on his in a way that made this feral handling of you feel more intimate, even though he didn't let up on his pace. Your hands found his face and held it more tenderly than he deserved, deepening your kiss more, prompting him to growl into your mouth almost frustratedly as he gave his final thrusts and came with an exhausting force.

Will felt like he would crumble apart if it wasn't for your limbs wrapped around him as if you were holding him together, the slow roll of your tongue giving him something calm to keep his racing mind fixed on. He carefully pulled out of you and helped you stand on your own, still kissing you as he struggled to catch his breath, his chest rising and falling sharply. Pivoting his body slightly so you were both back under the stream of water, he let it rain down to wash you both, his hands massaging your skin in soothing patterns that was more for his own benefit to relax.

You jolted when his hand grazed your sex that was beyond sensitive now, his fingers stilling as he registered the hesitation in your kiss.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked quietly, his brows knitted together as he looked at you seriously.

"No, of course not," you reassured, "I'm just very sensitive and a little sore." Noting the guilt on his face you continued, "A good sore."

"Okay," he smiled weakly, resting his forehead against yours and closing his eyes. "I'll be gentle."

He made good on his word, washing you with a tenderness that made your heart sing, the way he held your chin with his other and stroked his thumb along your cheek making you vow to give this man the world.

Out of the shower and depleted of all energy, Will sauntered back to his room with you, not bothering to wrap himself in a towel or even dry off, his only goal now to hit his mattress and try to get some sleep in before the sun crept up with the passing hours.

The smell of sex and sweat filled the room, revealing just how much effort both of you had exuded in your time together, and seeing the dark stains on the top cover from his profuse sweating, Will tore it off the bed and crawled in on top of the lesser-tainted sheets.

You stood at the end of the bed, gently running your towel through your hair to soak up the excess water, watching as he settled in comfortably with his legs slightly spread, sighing out loudly when he put his arm above his head.

"Are you joining me, or what?" he asked, his eyes closed and voice hoarse, a loose smile tugging at one corner of his lips.

"Do you still want me to?"

Your question forced his eyes open and made him prop himself up on his elbow, looking at you both seriously and a little confused.

"Why would you say that?"

You shrugged, regretting saying it based on the wounded expression on his face. "I just don't want to overwhelm you, Will, I don't want to make you feel…suffocated, or like this is all moving too fast."

He scoffed, his smile and shake of his head worrying you.

"Do you want to go?" he challenged, the steeliness of his blue eyes making your mouth feel dry.

You shook your head no, offering your hand to him when he extended his out, allowing him to pull you closer to the bed where he continued to hold your gaze. "To be fair, I haven't checked if you needed to get home for any reason, and you don't have your car…"

You laughed when he did, letting yourself sink onto the mattress where you kneeled beside him.

"I'm not going anywhere, Will," you whispered, your words holding more promise than just being for the rest of the night.

His thumb smoothed over your knuckles, and looking down at the connection of your hands, he spoke freely.

"I may not be sure of a single fucking thing in my life right now, but I do know that being with you sure feels damn right." He looked up at you, the creases on his forehead brought out as his eyebrows rose up, the boyish look in his eyes and his crooked smile making your heart flutter wildly. "It doesn't mean I'm not scared shitless, though."

Appreciating his honesty, you gave his hand a firm squeeze before bringing it up to your lips where you kissed across his knuckles, not wanting to over-do it by telling him you would never hurt him but needing to show him in some way. You trailed down his arm, peppering your lips slowly across the one that bore his smaller tattoo of the eagle, feeling his eyes sear your skin as he watched you worship him, your tongue threatening to tell him how you thought every piece of him was a work of art and not just the parts decorated by his tattoos.

He settled back into the bed, his long exhale sounding like one of contentment to your ears, prompting you to slide your body down to rest beside him, your mouth traveling from his arm to his chest until you were face to face.

"I'm still all-in," he murmured, his nose nudging yours as he gathered your hand and placed it between your chests.

"Me too."

The sound of Benny messing around in the kitchen was unmistakable and undoubtedly what woke Will, his eyes adjusting to the bright morning light when he forced his eyes open. He groaned and peeled his heavy arm off the mattress to check his watch; 8:12.

"Jesus Christ," he muttered to himself quietly, thinking how he hadn't slept this late since he was a kid, the reason behind it still sleeping peacefully beside him.

With a smile that he tucked between his teeth, Will got out of bed, keeping a watchful eye on you to make sure he didn't wake you up as he grabbed the towel you had used and wrapped it around his waist and moved toward the door.

He smiled again, noticing the pile of neatly folded, but dirty clothes on top of his dresser, and grabbed them before heading out the door.

The smell of something warm and sweet greeted him as he stalked down the hallway, his muscles feeling leaded with each step.

"Yo, Benny," he called, reaching the kitchen, but his brother was nowhere to be found.

A stack of freshly made pancakes sat on a plate beside the stove, a handwritten note left behind to explain them.

Chocolate chip protein pancakes

Heard you two burnin' a lot of cals…

Gym rats who fuck like bunnies gotta replace that lost protein.

Eat up.

Will’s stomach rumbled at the same time his chest did as he laughed, picking up one of the still-warm pancakes and folding it in half to shove in his mouth. The last time he was this hungry had to have been on a mission, but he thought how he would happily trade food any day for all the things he did with you last night.

Glancing around the kitchen in search of his phone, Will finally spotted it on the opposite counter where he usually kept it, no doubt having been placed there by Benny after finding it discarded on the floor along with everything else, his truck keys beside it.

You're a good man, Benny, he text after grabbing it, thankful to have his little brother around to look after him more than ever.

Making his way around the corner to the laundry room, Will lifted the lid on the washing machine and tossed his gym clothes in before sorting through yours and carefully checking the washing instructions on them. He dispensed the cheap, discount brand detergent into it and hoped the low quality wouldn't ruin anything, never really having to care too much about what would happen to his or Benny’s clothes.

Back in the kitchen, he reached for two mugs out of the cupboard beside the sink along with two water glasses and filled them up, once again appreciating Benny's generosity and attention to detail for putting a fresh pot of coffee on before leaving.

After rummaging through all the cabinets for a suitable tray to carry everything back to his room on and coming up empty, Will settled on a shallow cardboard box Frankie had brought fresh oranges over in the week before, placing the plate of pancakes, syrup, cutlery and drinks in it, and made his way out of the kitchen.

His phone buzzed as he passed it, and pausing to check the text displayed on the screen, he grinned and continued down the hallway.

Benny: I know

The towel around his waist hung loosely on his hips by the time he reached his door, pushing it open gently with his elbow and smiling when he set eyes on you still sleeping and all curled up in the spot he had been. The sheets were twisted around your bare body, tangled with your limbs and scarcely covering you, the way the cotton material cradled your skin looking so inviting and making him wish it was him.

Forgetting his hunger, Will set the box down on his dresser and untucked the portion of towel barely holding it on and let it fall to the floor, feeling the mattress dip to his weight as he kneeled on it and framed your body with his.

Unable to resist, he lowered himself until his face met your exposed thigh, pressing his lips against it once, and then again, ghosting them up until he reached your hip, having missed the sensation of your skin on his lips even though it hadn't been long since he last felt it.

He breathed in slowly, his eyes closing as your scent swam through every part of him, awakening his most primal needs once again.

Another kiss, another deep inhale, his lungs working to consume the smell of your slumbering arousal instead of taking in oxygen to calm his charged libido.

A split desire between wanting you to continue sleeping and needing you to wake up raged within him, his mouth watering with each kiss, his chest feeling constricted as his breathing grew more ragged even though he was desperately trying to control it. Reaching your waist, he let his tongue swipe out to lick up to your ribs, feeling your side contract as he tickled you, your sleepy moans and quiet whines resounding in his ears as you fought to stay asleep.

Slipping one of his hands between your legs, he slowly let it glide up along your inner thigh, your skin warm against his palm and impossibly smooth, his lips and tongue continuing to tease beneath your breasts and stomach until you eventually rolled onto your back.

Your eyes remained closed, but Will watched as a drowsy smile formed on your lips and your hand reached up to card through his hair, a contented sigh being his official greeting.

He needed you more than ever, set on making you feel as good as he possibly could, craving to taste every part of you.

Pushing your legs apart until they were flush against the bed, he settled between them, his lips marking a path upward that had you squirming beneath him already, and once he reached his destination, paused and looked up at you with a wildness in his blue eyes.

"Mornin', sweetheart."

---

Part 5

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