#ugh look when i say that i am obsessed with them..........star........

[bugaboo25]

I Will Forever Love You Chapter 3

Masterpost Prev

Thanks for all the kind words everyone, it's really helped keep my motivation up even though my schedule is absolutely crazy!

On to chapter 3:

Damian woke from his slumber as soon as the sun came up. Instead of remaining under his covers, he made his way to the restroom to prepare for the day. It was Saturday, yes, but weekends never meant relaxation for those in Wayne Manor. He grabbed his toothbrush, and, after lathering it to perfection, he began brushing his teeth. Slowly, Damian’s green eyes made their way to his reflection. His hand slowly came to a stop, and so he pulled the toothbrush from his mouth. His lips twitched down, so he stopped staring, stopped searching for a boy that shared his face and simply finished his morning routine.

            Once he was dressed, Damian sat on his bed. He reached underneath his mattress, pulling out a well-worn book. Damian allowed his fingers to trace the title: Cosmos by Carl Sagan. Even though he had no interest in the subject, he had read this book dozens of times. He flipped open the cover and stared at his neat handwriting, the last words his brother had ever spoken to him stared back at him. He sat in that manner for a good ten minutes, before flipping to the page that his bookmark currently resided on. He allotted himself twenty more minutes before he once again closed the novel. Damian never understood Danyal’s obsession with stars and the universe, but it was now the only way he could be close to his twin. Before he could carefully put the book back in its resting place, there was a knock on his door.

            “Baby Bird, I know you’re up!” Richard was knocking incessantly, so Damian placed his most prized possession on his desk, just out of sight of anyone that stood in the doorway. He opened the door, and Richard was immediately in his personal space. “Come on, the family’s going out for breakfast this morning, Alfred’s orders.” Damian cursed internally, if the butler had ordered they be seen in public for breakfast, then there was no possibility of not going. He allowed himself to be pulled out of his room, but not before shooting Danyal’s book a look of regret. He would have to place it back under his mattress when they returned, he just hoped Richard had not seen it.

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            Dick pulled Damian down the stairs, not letting him go until he was under Alfred’s watchful eye. He laughed to himself, knowing there was no way for him to slip away now. He pulled out his phone, already setting his plot in motion. He shot off a quick text to Tim.

            Dickie: wanna mess with Dames?

            Timber: always

            Timber: what did you have in mind?

            Dickie: there was a book sitting on his desk, cosmos or something

            Dickie: I gots to know if he’s got a thing for astronomy

            Timber: dude

            Timber: no way, it’s worn and there’s writing in it

            Timber: I am not getting attacked by demon brat again

            Dickie: ugh fine what’s it say?

            Dick opened the picture that Tim sent, and he had to stifle the sound rising in the back of his throat. I will forever love you -D. What was that doing written in one of Baby Bird’s books? It was his handwriting, that’s for sure. But Damian never said I love you, none of them did. Which, okay, maybe he should put some effort into that, but there’s no way that book was meant for anyone. It was old and worn, and Dick could make out what seemed to be a bookmark at the top of the picture. Did he get it from someone? He must have, but the only person whose name started with D in this family aside from Damian were Dick and Duke, and he didn’t give him the book and Duke sure as hell didn't give it to him. He came to the conclusion that this would require further investigation, then sat down and waited for the rest of the family.

            Tim came into the kitchen after Duke, Cass trailing behind him. He caught Dick’s eye, but he simply raised an eyebrow as he made his way to the coffee pot. The door flung open, and if the people in the room had been any other family, they would have jumped. As it was, five sets of eyes turned to look at Jason as he wore a large grin. As time continued forward, the Pit Rage had calmed to a point where he only had episodes a couple times a month. With the knowledge that he had better learned to control it and it was happening less often, Jason had once again started hanging around the manor. Alfred must have invited him to breakfast, as he joined everyone else in waiting for Bruce.

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            Slipping into the limo with the rest of his family, Tim allowed himself to take some time to consider what he had done that morning. He had been so ready to use Cosmos to tease Damian, but as soon as he saw the state of the book and the neatly written words just inside the cover, he had decided against it. Obviously, the novel was important to Damian, but due to the lack of anything else related to astronomy in his room, he had to guess it was for more personal reasons. If the youngest of the Bats was anything, it was less than receptive when it came to talking about personal matters. He also didn’t want to give Damian any reason to start attacking him again. Sure, it had been years since the last time he was on the stabby end of his katana, and they had gotten to a point where Tim was comfortable teasing him, but he didn’t want to risk anything. If it had only been a book that showed the beginnings of a new hobby, then he would’ve gone to town on the annoying big brother role. But it was obvious from the old, definitely overused pages, that it was something more than that.

            Dick would try to pry. He always tackled opportunities to get to know more details about any of his siblings; but Tim would stay out of this. Honestly, he just hoped that he had managed to get the book back exactly as it had been left. Damian was perceptive, and he would definitely notice if his possessions were left even a centimeter out of place. They all would.

            “Allioop!” Dick came flying through the door, sprawling out across Tim and Jason, who had sat in the space beside him. Tim swatted at Dick’s hair, and Jason started lightly slapping at his stomach.

            “Get off, Dickface! Sit like a normal person, next to met not on me!” Jason was grumbling, a scowl sitting on his features. The fondness that was in his eyes was covered, but not unnoticeable to anyone that was in the vehicle. Tim took that second to check and sure enough, everyone had piled in during his musings. Cass, Damian, and Duke (who was snickering into his hand, the traitor) were sat on the opposite end of the limo, and Bruce was sat in the passenger seat next to Alfred.

            Dick pulled himself off of his brothers and threw his arm across his forehead, leaning against the seat and the door. “Oh woe is me, no one appreciates my fun.” He cracked an eye open, and the look he shot towards Jason and Tim was one filled with mirth and amusement.

            “I would refute, Richard, but your ‘fun’ often ends with you acting as a if you are a kicked puppy.” All eyes shot to Damian, because holy shit he just dissed one of them in a non-demeaning way. And was that a smile tugging at his lips? It was barely there but – oh my god, it was. Tim’s mouth dropped, because was the demon brat acting like part of the family? “Don’t strain yourself, Drake.” Damian’s tone was biting again, but the ghost of a smile was still on his face, so all Tim could do was make a choking noise as he snapped his jaw shut and looked out the window.

            Well, maybe breakfast wouldn’t be a complete disaster.

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            Bruce made his way to the grandfather clock once they were back at the manor. He allowed himself a small smile, thinking back to the way his children had bickered and teased each other at the restaurant. He was delighted when he had seen Damian having to hold back a laugh after Dick’s fork had been drenched in syrup curtesy of Jason. He was finally beginning to feel as though his family was almost whole with the return of Jason and the breaking down of Damian’s walls.

            After slipping into his costume, Bruce set to work. He wanted to sigh, but Tim and Dick had just walked into the cave, whispering at each other. He raised his eyebrow at the hushed tones that stopped once they were in earshot of him. He would have to look into that later, collaborating in whispers between his children never led to positive outcomes.

            “Whatcha working on?” Dick never was one to be subtle, but he welcomed the olive branch. He would need help with this case, his suspect was eluding him at every turn, and it was starting to wear on him.

            “Vlad Masters.” He already had his files pulled up, so he clicked on the tab that had a picture of the man. He glared at the screen, hoping that the missing piece would reveal itself by just staring at the picture for a little longer. “He’s gone from low millionaire to high billionaire in just under two years. None of his business partners remember their meetings, only that they signed away at least half of their company before he was gone.”

            “You think he’s drugging them? Or maybe mind control?” Tim was taking his spot at the batcomputer, already starting his review of the files. Dick was watching over his shoulder, and he hoped that maybe they could find something they didn’t.

            Suddenly, Damian was flying over the edge of the stairs and hurling towards them. Bruce simply turned to look, and Dick was ducking away from the 16-year-old’s fist. “Did either of you imbeciles go in my room?” Damian’s tone was angry, though he didn’t attack again. He was getting better at controlling his temper, it seemed. Though, with the way Tim’s shoulders were ever so slightly tense, he guessed that he was the culprit.

            “Uh, yeah. It was me. Sorry, Dames, I wandered in this morning on accident. No sleep last night and no coffee yet. You know me. I think I nudged something on your desk, and that’s what kickstarted my brain. I left as soon as I noticed.” Tim’s voice was cool, but Bruce could detect the way his voice was just barely higher than normal. So, he was lying about the reason, then. He would have to ask later.

            Damian visibly relaxed, though he was still holding himself with respect. “Fine. Just do not repeat that mistake again in the future, or I will have your fingers.” With that, he was leaving the cave as quickly as he had come down. No doubt Alfred was forcing him to do his homework before he began any work in the cave.

            Bruce turned towards Tim with a raised eyebrow and the question on his face. “I saw something I shouldn’t have.” Huh, he must feel pretty guilty about it if he wasn’t even going to try to lie. “Just a book with a message. No big.” Tim was once again looking through the files on Masters.

            “Have you looked at any of his connections yet?” Bruce grunted, a silent yes. “What about those from college? It doesn’t seem like he has that many friends, though there’s a couple he used to spend his time with while he was getting his degree.” Another grunt, this time signaling that no, he had not checked his college friends out just yet. Tim opened another tab and pulled up a picture of a large man with black hair next to a shorter woman with ginger hair. They were both wearing ugly jumpsuits. Tim continued to scroll, and it was only a couple pictures down that they stopped.

            It was a picture of the Fenton family in a lab. Their daughter, 17 at the time of the picture if Bruce had to guess, was a perfect mix of her parents. She was tall, probably close to 6 feet, with teal eyes and the same hair color as her mother. It was the son that had garnered their attention, though. Because staring at them through the screen was Damian, but a Damian with eyes the exact same shade of blue as Bruce’s and a large grin. His hair was longer, and he was wearing a black hoodie with stains and a ghost symbol hovering over the word ‘Boo!’, but there was no mistaking the skin tone, or the eye shape, or the nose. That was Damian’s face with an unknown expression and different eyes, and it took the three men in the room longer to collect themselves than it should have.

            “Please tell me you’re seeing what I’m seeing.” Dick was the first to speak, his eyes shifting between Bruce and the boy on the screen. “Please tell me I’m not going crazy and seeing Dami in the place of a completely different kid.”

            “You’re not going crazy.” Tim’s reply was shallow, garbled by the confusion that laced his features. Bruce wasn’t sure what to make of this situation, but Tim was already tapping away, pulling up all the information that he could. “Daniel James Fenton. Age 16. He was adopted by the Fenton family seven years ago… today. He didn’t give anything other than his first name. Just wandered into Amity Park, Illinois with a… with a sword?”

            “Hn.” Bruce wanted to lean towards the clone theory, but what would the League of Assassins have to gain with creating a clone of Damian and then sending him to American for seven years?

            “It could just be a coincidence, you know.” Dick was calming himself down, his breathing was slowing. “There are supposed to be seven people in the world that look like you.”

            “Yeah, plus, look at his eyes. They aren’t the same color!” Tim was almost screaming now. “Totally just a coincidence.”

            “Yeah, but that blue is the exact same as Bruce’s��” Dick was leaning forward onto the chair now, careful not to knock Tim off balance. “We… we have to look into this. What if Bruce has another kid!”

            “Yeah, but the age… Dames would’ve told us if he had a twin, right?” None of them could answer that question. Damian was a lot of things, but open about his past was not one of them. If the documents were real, then that means that Daniel was out of the League a year before Damian. There was no way to know for sure, and Bruce was positive he would not get the answers from his son.

            “Where are the Fenton’s now?” The best course of action was to try and find Damian’s lookalike. They could do DNA testing once they did that.

            “They’re… on their way to Gotham for a convention?” Tim had pulled up security footage and the Fenton’s public schedule. “The Paranormal Physiology and Biology Convention, to be exact. It seems both Maddie and Jack, the parents, have doctorates in paranormal ecto-biology, and the daughter, Jasmine or Jazz, is currently attending Gotham University for a degree in Psychology.” Okay, they were on their way to Gotham. So, getting a DNA sample to run would be easier than originally anticipated, unless he was trained by the League. That would make this plan more difficult than anticipated.

            “Find out where they will be in Gotham. Then I want you to try and get a DNA sample so we can run tests and figure out whether he’s a clone. If we’re lucky, he might be willing to help us build a case against Masters.” Bruce was heading for the batmobile now. He needed to think. Either there was a clone of his son living in Illinois for the past seven years, or he had another son that had been free of the League.

            He isn’t sure which one would be better.

[chryblossomjjk]

bts fic recommendations | 03.07.23

→ hi friends! this is a little segment i do every tuesday (reviewsday get it, aren’t i funny, pls tell me how funny i am) where i read and review two-three fics. as a content creator, i know how big of a role other creators play in your growth, therefore, i want to do my part in making sure everyone gets the recognition they deserve! so with that being said, please check out the amazing fics listed below. make sure to like, reblog, and leave feedback! ♡ #reviewsday #kikirecs

stardust - @euphoricfilter (jjk x reader | fluff, smut, f2l)

summary:  if jungkook would have known an unintentional orgasm would have led to this, then he would have begged you to work out with him sooner.

naur bby when i tell you i loved this from the first paragraph...

"If every living being’s foundation is made of stardust, scattered when born, then Jungkook thinks the two of you were made from the same star."

and the way you continued the analogy throughout was pure literature gold (or should i say diamond teehee). its stuff like this that i read and im like damn, the moots are really out here posting fics that could easily be published best sellers for fucking free!! how lucky are we!!!

OOF AND THE PILLOW PRINCESS COMMENT HAD ME LOOKING AROUND THE ROOM BLUSHING BC HOW DOES HE KNOW ME LIKE THAT I FELT CALLED OUT LMAO

and the whole workout scene hits even better after his workout live like i legit was able to visual everything... and sex in the mirror will never not be top tier :')

i love this jungkook dearly. this is how i imagine irl jk yk? just that hopeless romantic vibe, feeling that he has someone on this earth that is meant for him and he's meant for them. thats encapsulated so beautifully in this fic. such beautiful writing, thank you for blessing us with this fucking masterpiece!!

knee high socks - @minniesvenus (jjk x reader | smut, college au)

summary: after being obsessed with you and your knee high socks for forever, jungkook can't believe that you finally notice him.

okay so do you ever just hear a song or smell a smell that feels so incredibly nostalgic and fills your head with dreamy thoughts and stars and stuff... that's exactly how i felt while reading this! like i just kept thinking of the arctic monkeys song and the way you characterized jungkook's crush is just so authentic. its just that pure school crush feeling where you anticpate seeing this person and the more time you see them you pick up on little things and it makes you fall even deeper oof. there's just something so fimilair about the way you wrote this and it's probably one of the most realistic depictions i've seen of the natural progression of a crush like uGH THE FUCKING TALENT !!!

and it makes you root for him so much like i was internally cheering for him when she asked him to sit next to him. it was so fucking wholesome and sweet i screamed

and then shit got unwholesome real quick whew

her giving him praise actually made me so happy though! like you definitely inspired me to write more of that bc its so refreshing and cute!! and the smut was saur naughty but so sweet bc she was just guiding him through the motions and once again it just felt so natural which is no easy feet!! like you really hit the nail on the head with this one and it will be added to my comfort fic list asap!! so so so lovely!!

in the seom: love for dummies - @thvhoe (jjk x reader | smut, fluff, angst, fwb, college au, camping au)

summary: always the friend, never the girlfriend. jeon jungkook doesn't date. at least that's what he thought until he met you, a chemistry student who seemed to have it all—except for love. meeting at a mutual friends frat party, you hit it off right away. however, due to both of your stubbornness, it has never progressed beyond being friends with benefits. the annual camping trip with your friend group was supposed to be the turning point in your relationship with jungkook. but what happens when your best friend of 18 years unexpectedly comes back from busan and confesses to you, further complicating matters?

OoF WHAT A FUCKING OPENING SCENE LMAO!! i was horny from fucking JUMP!!! and kook juggling between pet names and not knowing what to call her made me giggle but always made me extremely soft like aw :') <3

and y/n really whipped that fuckboy into shape we love to see it!! he better buy gifts n work for the coochie!!! >:(

"Pookie🩶: Can't sleep. Send me a pic of your boobies?"

this had me cackling bc this behavior is saur... annoyingly endearing like he legit is a big baby and i love him lmao even though unholy he is extremely cute.

^y/n and i both having immaculate taste and listening to ditto

and i am so thankful things turned out well for this pairing. i felt so sad for him like ugh the protectiveness and worry over her. he was generally just so wholesome throughout this entire fic. def a fav protrayal of jungkook. thank you so much for sharing this beautiful peice with us my love!

[angelmichelangelo]

if you are still taking requests ,, i am once again requesting rise disaster twins. IM SORRY OKAY they are the sillies of all and i am obsessed with how you write them and their dynamic. mayhaps something goofy and fluffy of your choosing. also a good time for me to say that across all of your tmnt fics, i adore how well you write authentic sibling relationships. it is so satisfyingly accurate and a big reason as to why youre one of my fave fic authors :)))))) anyways enjoy the rest of your vaycay while you can !!!!

AHH TYSM FOR SUCH KIND WORDS ;__; appreciate it, pal! here are some of the sillies :3

read on ao3!

x

“There’s a ghost in the bathroom.”

Leo says it as he torpedoes into Donnie’s room, launching himself onto his bed at full speed to sprawl across his legs, making the other turtle click in annoyance at him as he tries to free himself from the heavyweight now draped across his lower limbs.

“No there isn’t,” Donnie hisses, setting his iPad down carefully on his side table. “Now get off of me.”

Leo rolls onto his shell, starfishing out his arms and legs to distribute his weight further as Don attempts to buck him off. “Nope.” He says, entirely serious, popping the p and everything. “There is. I saw it. You gotta check it out with me.”

Donnie scoffs (a real one this time) and rolls his eyes hard enough to leave some strain there in his skull. “Was it not the boiler whistling again? I told you it was gonna do that.”

Leo shakes his head. “Nuh uh. I know what the boiler sounds like, Don, I harmonize with it every morning. In perfect pitch and everything.”

Donnie’s brow swoops low over his eyes. “Yeah. I know.” He sighs, and tries again to roll his brother off his body but fails. “Ugh. Fine. I’ll come check out your stupid ghost.”

Leo grins a wicked smile and props himself up onto his elbows, seemingly about to release him before he pauses and shoots his brother a steady glance.

“I’d be careful about calling it stupid,” he says, still entirely serious about the whole thing. “That shit will haunt you for life.”

Donnie deadpans him and gives him a hard enough shove to move him to the edge of the bed. “Just go.”

There isn’t a ghost in the bathroom. Not that Donnie can notice anyway.

He inspects the room with a keen eye, because even if he does veer on the whole non believer stuff he hates being wrong about anything, especially in front of Leo — so full ghost hunter mode it is.

“I think it’s just the old pipes,” Donnie concludes after Leo launches into a detailed explanation as to what he’d heard in here moments ago. “They just rattle a bit and make noise.”

Leo snorts a laugh. “Like dad.”

Donnie doesn’t laugh, but does indeed agree. “Like dad.”

Leo bobs his head, looks at himself in the mirror and then says,

“Awesome. No ghost. Come get waffle cone with me to celebrate?”

To that, Donnie tips his head back, all the way without it falling clean off his shoulders and makes a very ghostly sounding groan.

“What?” Leo says with a laugh, ribbing him gently with an elbow in his side.

Donnie’s head snaps upwards, maybe a little too fast on the account of the stars that swirl about in his head before he can take a breath, and he’s narrowing his eyes into sharp slits, directed right at him.

“You did this to get me to go get waffle cone with you?”

Leo reaches over and in the condensation of the mirror does a little finger drawing of Donnie, large eyebrows of course exaggerated with a little speech bubble that reads wehhh next to him with a frowny face.

“Can’t a hermano choose to hang with his hermano?” He says once he’s down, beaming proudly at it before looking back to see if Donnie was watching at all.

“Ugh.” Donnie responds dryly. “You don’t have to… fabricate the paranormal laws to get me to hang out, Nardo.” And suddenly the bathroom feels a little cramped for the pair of them.

Leo’s face softens and Donnie feels a swell of guilt suddenly rise up from his gut.

“Er, yeah I do, dude,” Leo says with a breathy laugh. “The other day when we went to the skate park?”

Donnie folds his arms over his chest defensively. “Yeah? I went with you, didn’t I?”

Leo nods. “Yeah, only after I’d argued with you about how you should put rocket launchers on my wheels, and you said you’d come with me to make sure I hadn’t.”

Donnie bristles. “That… was entirely practical.”

“Or the other time,” Leo continues. “When we went to Run of the Mill for lunch and I told you I could finish that entire sundae in five minutes.”

“And you didn’t. You were nearly sick, Hueso threw you out by the scruff of your shell.”

Leo chuckles. “Yes but you still came with me. It worked, didn’t it?”

Donnie feels his whole body sag, arms hanging limp at his sides, deflated like a giant, soggy balloon.

“Leo…” he says, feeling small. “I… you didn’t have to—”

“Dude!” Leo is quick to interject whatever it is he was planning on saying by looping his arms around his neck and pulling him in tight. “Do not start on the sorry crap right now or I’m bringing that sundae up again, I don’t care that I ate and digested it a week ago, it’s coming up.”

Donnie untangles himself from his twin’s iron bar hold and frowns at him. “But you shouldn’t have to find excuses for me to hang out with you.” He says.

Leo shakes his head, like everything was easy, breezy, Leo-squeezy.

“Don-Tron, I know it’s not easy for you, bro. The whole socializing thing? I got you, man. S’what I’m here for.” A playful beat. “Besides being the better looking one.”

Donnie scowls at him in full force. “I disagree.”

Leo jabs a thumb to little mirror drawing Donnie that was starting to drip across the glass.

“He doesn’t,” he says. “Waffle cone? You and I?”

Donnie huffs, though in truth, he does want waffle cone. And he does want to hang out with his brother.

“You and I,” he says. “And the ghost?”

Leo grins, all teeth and hooks Donnie in close with his arm as they exit the bathroom together.

“Yup. Only the best, Dee.”

[thepunkmuppet]

it’s 3am and i haven’t looked at anyone else’s thoughts on the episodes at all yet, so this is pure unfiltered from my brain.

I fucking LOVED the star beast. the script was great, the actors were incredible, the cgi and practical effects were INSANE and yeah it was fanservice-y but that was frankly what I signed up for (I’m a fan, I like being serviced, etc you get the drill).

I have a whole host of wonderful things to say, which makes the stuff I don’t like stand out more, and I want to talk about them and get other people’s thoughts. please keep in mind I am trans and a feminist when I say this lol, I’m absolutely not going “UGH IT’S WOKE” and I want to make that abundantly clear!!

but yeah, what didn’t work for me was the “non-binary” line and the “let it go” scene.

the first one because just… what? genuinely I just don’t understand what that line means or how it fits in, like just have rose saying the random words and then “binary” alongside donna, her saying “non-binary” just doesn’t mean anything or fit in at all… truly if anyone can find an explanation for that please lmk because I just don’t know what it means!

and the second one… yeah idk, it felt very forced especially with the whole “ooh if you were still a woman you’d understand” - there are so many wonderful powerful women in the episode, but that exchange was soooo captain marvel iykwim, and felt really out of place in a really very progressive and beautifully handled episode.

and just the plot of it all - like just have them both be safe from dying because they share the metacrisis power, and include a sappy cheesy line about that! it just feels weird and cheapening to have them go “yeah nuh uh” and just… get rid of it?? like this is such a big plot point, if donna could do that the whole time why didn’t she?? also HOW did they even do that?? idk it just feels really cringey and overly convenient and out of place, when they could have easily just kept the two of them with the metacrisis power.

also this is a nitpick but as much as I LOVE the reveal of rose having the metacrisis power too, I really wish it had actually been foreshadowed, like I wish we had seen the alien monster dolls (that look like the daleks, ood, cybermen, etc) before the flashback sequence. again real nitpick though, it doesn’t really matter and I still love the reveal

anyway yeah I want to know what people think about my gripes with the episode, because like I said I haven’t seen ANYTHING about other people’s thoughts yet. on the whole it was amazing, I loved every second, and omg the new tardis interior??? so fucking ready for this new era, I’m obsessed!!

also also rose is my wonderful gorgeous princess and no one can convince me otherwise :)

[rebeccalouisaferguson]

“I look for the simple relationship dramas of just going to the loo while somebody is brushing their teeth. It’s just a fucking shot and it’s just real. I want that,” says Swedish-born actor, Rebecca Ferguson. And although she wants a skin-and-bones realism when it comes to the films she makes, she is certainly a darling of the movie theater spectacle. In other words, Ferguson graces some of the most grand and big budget films known to earth-dwellers, that of the Mission Impossible series, where she stars alongside none other than Tom Cruise, or her effortless depth as Lady Jessica in Dune and the forthcoming Part Two, as well as helming post-apocalyptic Apple TV+ series Silo, which is slated for a second season, and these are just to name a few.

Ferguson speaks further regarding her process when it comes to choosing a project to work on, “I read a script and I like a script, and I like a character, and I like the director, and I like the ensemble.” But then she pauses, light from the street moving across her face, “But, honestly, I do get sick and tired of playing powerful women. Or being asked that question: ‘You like playing powerful women, don’t you?’ I think [to myself], ‘Ugh, no, I just like playing people with thoughts and actions and reactions.’ And I think why I’m loving these films and series (Dune, Mission Impossible, Silo), is because it’s an uncontrolled environment. I like an environment that takes you into something unsettling, taking control of you and you have to adapt.”

Ferguson has adapted, ladies and gentlemen. Considering her lengthy résumé, it’s as if she has punched a winning artistic lottery ticket. Additionally, her experience has now allowed her to be of service, which the star is grateful for and does not take for granted. “It’s quite nice,” she says, speaking of her chops offering virtues, “because we have new characters in season two of Silo, and they are nervous, and a bit younger, and it’s nice to nurture and care for them on set. Like, I don’t like flying, I’m claustrophobic, but if I fly with someone who’s terrified, I’m super cool. I think that happens on set as well. You can kind of pretend you’ve got your shit together.”

Pretending or not, Ferguson is interested in humanity, meaning, she is interested in people that care for one another, not just treating artists and the like as if they are capitalistic puzzle pieces. “I feel similar to Denis Villeneuve (the director of Dune) in the way I run a set. When I say ‘me,’ I mean that I’m the lead of it and I produce it, and I am part of the collaboration and safety—” note, Ferguson is an executive producer on Silo— “and to be a part of the bigger picture is really important for me. To feel connected because we’re people. And I do well with people who are character actors and quite self-obsessed. It’s interesting, I love drama and I think it’s fun as long as its kind, but I want a really good set. I want a happy set where everyone feels heard and seen.” She continues eloquently, “I think acting is so delicate and individual. But if you feel safe then the humanity of holding space for each other [can happen], so then you feel safe to explore. Also, when you get older...” Ferguson pauses, and a wry smile appears, “I want to have fun, man. I want to really come to work and enjoy it.”

Considering the milestone 25th anniversary issue at hand, we can’t help but ask if Ferguson would share some of her own career and personal-life highlights. She says that she likes to keep certain aspects of her personal life private, however, her work milestones seem to reflect that the lessons on set feed into the way she is off set. “Career wise, I was going to say it was quite recent, oddly enough,” Ferguson recounts, “I remember on The White Queen (a BBC One television series of which Ferguson was the lead), I was sitting with Max Irons on the thrones, I was playing the Queen of England, as a Swede, trying to elongate my vowels, and I looked out over all the people on set, and said to [Irons], ‘This is about us! We’re here! This is huge for me!’ We laughed, and it was not like, ‘I had made it.’ It was more of this feeling of: ‘I can’t believe I’m allowed to do this.’ I get back to that moment often because that moment taught me to now and then just stop and look at what I’ve done, and look at where I am because I keep on just going. It’s go and go and go, and project after project, and boom boom boom, and I don’t stop to just go, ‘Wow, I’ve done really well. I’m so lucky!’”

We pause and take in the silver lining of the artistic battle. The agony and the ecstasy therein. How the go go go can feel so good whilst simultaneously feeling overwhelming. It is wonderful to witness a star like Ferguson recounting not the money made or the awards won as milestones, but the experiences had, and the resultant upward spiritual shifts of her life. She goes on and let’s us in a bit closer, and we gladly listen: “The other time was the realization that I don’t give two fucks to say what I want on set. That is the most powerful moment for me. It was less than six years ago. I had something in my mind but I didn’t do [what I needed to do for myself]. I was terrified, and I felt really unfairly treated by an actor I was working with. I remember leaving that set thinking I have disliked this entire shoot, and I couldn’t stand that for myself. I thought, ‘I don’t want to do this if this is what it’s like,’ because I’m far too fragile, but the next film I did after that was amazing. I wonder if that was a transition for me, of being able to say: I don’t like this. Self-worth...”

And she lets that one fade away. We know what she means. Anyone with a pulse knows what she means. Self-worth and its multifaceted teachings. How self-worth allows us to be strong and steady and available. After all, what is the point of it all if we can’t help those that come after us? Ferguson laughs, “I remember saying to Tom Cruise once—and we were in a helicopter traveling to set, obviously—‘You know your life is really fucked up, buddy.’ And he was like, ‘What?’ I said, ‘You travel in a helicopter to work... and I’m just going to leave it right there.’ He was quiet, and said, ‘Yeah, I know. But you know what? My experience is through you.’ And I loved that he said that. I thought, ‘I guess that’s what I feel with the younger people on set now,’ I get so much from them. One of them said [to me recently], ‘I’m really nervous,’ as it was a huge set, and I thought ‘It is a huge set,’ I walk on appreciating it and loving it, but I’m also very comfortable, but the young ones walk backwards whilst walking forward, and they look for me to help them.”

This all must be why Rebecca Ferguson continues to shine in some of the grandest roles and grandest productions. Not just because she can act her ass off or that her face is something Botticelli would weep over, but because of her remembrance of humanity. We get so much of entertainment backwards—we think it’s this parade of opening weekend decadence and red carpet façade, but it’s really this assemblage of hearts and minds aching to do good, aching to build community through magic. “We move on so quickly in life,” Ferguson says, as we nearly conclude, “We just had a moment now where I could have stayed at work for an extra hour and it would have helped them, but I also stood there going, ‘I’ve promised my daughter I would be home, and I’m actually just going to stick to that promise.’ I felt bad for leaving, as I would like to help them more, but to be able to stand there in myself and go: No, these are the moments in life that mean everything.”

The moments. The delicate balance. The balance between on-screen queen and at-home mother. The virtues collide betwixt the personal and the professional. The magic and the simple. Sometimes blurring the lines. And blurred or not, always keeping the silver-smithed love intact. 

[mushed-kid]

Haiii how are you and your boyfie!?!

hi hes amazing like always oh my god like i love him, i dont even know what to say to make you understand how in love with him i am because hes soooooooo

i cant think of him for too long because i stop breathing but i also cant stop thinking about him. (im in love with him). he gives me everything failure.

he’s like actually perfect, as a person but also like, i dont think you could get a better boyfriend like he’s so nice and caring and he makes me so fucking sappy its embarrassing.

i mean he’s soooooooooo. like. ugh. i dont know enough words.

he’s so kind and sweet and he’s so nice and he’s funny and its so fun to be with him and talk to him, and i wish i could spend every second of my life with him because he makes me so happy, and you know that feeling when you’re looking at the sunset? he’s like putting stars into a box and snorting them. and i’m 100% sure that he would write something really poetic and romantic and touching and beautiful instead of the sentence i just said.

it’s like bumping into god on the street. i’m terrified of him. he’s so cool and smart and i don’t get how he likes me back because jesus christ. what a mess. he’s so good at everything he does, i haven’t seen him do anything badly ever. and he’s actually so nice. he doesn’t know how good he is. he’s the most best person i know. that’s a very bad sentence but it’s true.

i wish i could shrink him and carry him in my pocket so that i could make sure he’s safe and that i never lose him. i want to get rich so i can give him everything ever.

and oh my god. he’s the color red. and i love that because red is the color for love and i love him so much and it’s perfect just like him. and the song brooklyn red. and ohhh my god. every song is him. and i totally don’t deserve him because he’s soooooooooo. i love him so mush. haha.

you know those questions that are like “whats something you could give a presentation about with no preparation” or “what could you talk about for hours without running out of stuff to say” and all those, it’s literally him. how much i love him.

i could probably spend the rest of my life writing about how i feel about him and god knows how much i actually have written about it. (it’s a Lot.) like im actually obsessed with him. it’s regularly affecting my life because i can’t stop making everything about him. and im so sorry to everyone that’s tried to talk to me and i keep making the topic about him. i cant help it.

there’s so much stuff i want to do.

im not even exaggerating with all this, he’s Just That Good. and i guess you could say no one is That Good but yes. he is, you just don’t know him. i feel bad for everyone that doesn’t know him. he makes everything better because he’s him, he’s perfect. he makes me feel so much better about everything.

i miss him so much, i miss talking to him. i have to stop writing this i’m getting overwhelmed. my nose is so stuffed and it’s hard enough to breathe already. he gives me so many feelings. and it drives me crazy that he doesn’t realize how perfect he is.

what was the question? we’re doing good, i’d say.

[applesandbannas747]

"yeah?" "yeah"

AHHHHHHh I'm crying that was so freaking CUTE this is my fault in our stars lol. I swear I could hear how gentle that was such an adorable moment but also that whole scene with jesse had me screaming. the 🥺 moment too 😭😭 am I the only one that thinks seiji was just abit disappointed it wasn't an actual date? or am I delusional? I'm also convinced that scene where nick says he knows seiji secretly likes sundaes he's drawn more attractive/cute blushing smiling bc it's seijis pov

I KNOWWWW god that was such a perfect place to end it jdkfsa just such soft and quiet connection shared in that moment TT.TT

I am feral for all the jesse scenes dude FERAL aaaa they were all so good and provided so much insight to him and his relationship with Seiji and also they're both so beautiful!! LMFAO Seiji was definitely not opposed to it being a date and lowkey calling bullshit on Nick's backtracking, so I think it's reasonable to assume he was at least a little disappointed Nick did backtrack. but omfg NICK bestie just burst in to pull Seiji away with the excuse of a DATE. not "but Seiji's fencing me" or just a back off, I'm his fried vibe. Nope. right to date. he's staking his territory XD declaring his intentions. eVEN if he toned them down after leaving Jesse, Jesse's still under the impression that he was for real (and, see, notice how Seiji calling Nick his friend is what upset Jesse, not Nick saying they were dating?? that shows his priorities)

I find it funny that you label Nick 'cute' in the sundae scene because I think it's the least cutesy he's been drawn in a while (and I love it). He is for sure cute af in that scene in personality/interaction/the blushing, but he also looked cool and handsome and serious in the way he was drawn. And the blushes were all the sweeter for it <3 BUT I'm absolutely obsessed with the Seiji Vision theory because Nick is noticeably more attractive in whatever way you wanna label it, and I love the idea that it's because we're seeing him through Seiji's eyes ugh literally sobbing. It makes me think a little about @internetbanality's point years ago that Seiji imagines Nick as smiling when thinking about his pestering to come watch his match, even though Nick wasn't smiling in the actual scene

[cosmossupernova]

So I have those two ocs that I love so freaking much and I need their story to exit in another place other than my mind. So yeah, that's what all of this is about.

ANYWAY ! This fic is mostly just for fun so yeah, don't expect me to be too serious about all of this.

This is the story of Daisy, a robotic angel that got bored of heaven and decided to go live in hell for the sake of it. Down there she's going to meet love a second time until she realize that it's mostly one sided because the one she loves is way too obsessed with another man. And Hikari, a fallen angel that is literally made of light as she ressembles a hologram. Those two girls cannot see each other and would do anything to get rid of the other... unless ? Let's discover why do they hate each other in the first place and how they had to work together in order to save their lives.

I genuinely hope that someone is going to read the story of my oc and is going to like them :,)

You can also find that fic on AO3

Part 1: Daisy

- “ GODDAMNIT ! WHERE THE FUCK IS IT ?! ”

I hear the television demon yell in the other room, probably looking for his phone that I had kindly took with me and put on the coffee table in the living room as I was sat on the couch watching TV.

- “ It's right here honey, like always. ”

I sighed as I finally saw my boyfriend's head pop out from the other room and look at me with a confused look until I pointed his phone on the table. He smiled and quickly walked over me to grab what seemed to be more important than me. I tried smiling at him hoping that would get a reaction out of him and maybe, in the best case, a kiss the cheek but of course, I was met with nothing as he walked away and finished getting ready for work. Not even a freaking thank you ?! Ugh, why am I even trying ? He lost interest in me a long time ago. The only reason we're still dating is because, first, I'm good looking and the fans love me ! And second, since I'm a pretty popular pop star, I'm giving him publicity just by going out with him. I let out an annoyed groaned as I pinched the bridge of my nose before I heard the front door slam, meaning that he was already gone. I felt tears in my eyes as he, once again, forgot to just say goodbye to me or even acknowledge me. I finally stood up after a few long minutes and stretched. I didn't have work today so I could pretty much anything that I wanted except if it has anything to do with his money, reputation or Alastor. I shook my head as I tried to chase my thoughts away and walked toward the bathroom, thinking about Alastor, I could go pay a visit at that hotel ! It has been a while since I talked to its residents ! Wouldn't want them to think that I don't like them or the project anymore ! I quickly showered, brushed my blonde hair and tied my hair in a ponytail. I then looked at myself in the mirror. Even with my demon disguise, I still looked pretty heavenly, white skin that resembled porcelain, baby blue eyes that looked like the heaven sky and blonde hair that reminded me a yellow tulip. At least I still had my raccoon like mask around my eyes, my tail that was ending with a street light, since my death was linked to those and of course, my horns.

When I got back into our shared room, that was mostly mine with how little he slept in it, I immediately opened my closet and started looking through my clothes. Most of them were gifts from Vox but I didn't really like any of those because they always looked too much like... him. I finally found my favorite dress and took it out of the closet. I was a dark red dress that had a had short skirt and gave me a beautiful cleavage, I knew he didn't like it because it was showing too much skin and because of its color but I didn't really care about what he thought of it. I put it on before I put on a matching pair of shoes and grabbed my purse.

Damn I looked hot like that. Too bad my boyfriend didn't care about me.

I sighed and finally left our penthouse so I could finally go to that little hotel. I decided to walk because I definitely needed some fresh hair after being inside for so long.

About 30 minutes later, I finally arrived in front of Charlie's hotel, I took a deep breath before I knocked and waited for someone to answer the door. The seconds went by and quickly became minutes. I knocked again, harder this time, hoping someone would hear. me until I lost my patiente and entered the hotel. It was empty.

I looked around for a moment until it was clear that no one was there, I sat there, confused because it was really unusual for Charlie to leave the hotel without any words but I just guessed she was busy somewhere else. I took a sit on a couch and looked at a painting for a moment before I took my phone out and noticed a text rom Vox. I was about to open it to see what he could possibly have to tell me but I was interrupted by someone kicking the hotel's doors open.

- “ Heya everyone ! ”

I groaned in annoyance when I recognized the voice of the only person I hated in heaven and hell.I slowly turned my head around and almost let a sigh out when my eyes met the white dots in her dark eyes, the only part of her that wasn't producing light. Hikari, one of the few person that knew about my secret and definitely the person I hated the most. Unlike me, she didn't hide her annoyance when she spotted me.

- “ Oh great ! Miss I'm so much better than everyone is there but none of the people I wanted to see are ! Just great ! ” She facepalmed and let out an annoyed sigh before she sat on the couch in front of me. “ Where is everyone anyway ? ”

- “ If I knew, I wouldn't be sitting here in front of you. ” I answered with a glare. “ I've been waiting for them for a few minutes already, so you should probably leave since they're not going to be back soon. ” I smirked and crossed my arms, I knew how impatient she was so I was sure she was going to left really soon.

- “ Nah, I'll wait. ” It was her turn to smirk as she noticed my smile dropping. “ Wouldn't want you to feel too lonely now, miss nobody cares about me ! ”

- “ Ugh, if you want to insult me, at least be original ! You've called me that a hundred times ! It's not even funny! ” I rolled my eyes and grabbed my phone again but she yanked it away from me.

- “ What's so important that you're going to drop your polite act to check your phone ? Oooooh, your boyfriend sent you a text ! Well, it would be a real shame if I... answered it instead of you ! ”

She started laughing as I stood up and clenched my fists. She looked at me with a smirk but her smile quickly dropped when I tackled her and pinned her to the couch.

Welp... yeah, I wanted to leave some suspense on my little story ! But don't worry ! I should write the next chapter pretty soon ! Anyway, thank you for reading the first chapter and I'll see you on part two !

[thegreatflyinggrayson]

please tell us about your 15 step skincare routine

I'm so glad someone asked! (Pimple mentions incoming!!!)

Here are my steps, in order, with time and materials (also this is just my morning routine, not my nightime one):

Before I do anything (this is kind of gross, I know) I go through and check for acne and blackheads and all that fun stuff, because I'll have to treat them later in the process.

Every morning I hop in the shower and wash up. This is important because the steam is great for my face, and it saves time so I don't need to use a steamer. I don't wash my face in the shower, though.

While I'm in the shower I use an exfoliating body scrub to remove any dead skin and such.

I shave once I'm out of the shower, because I don't really go for the scruffy/grizzled look. I use this amazing buttery soft shaving cream that moisturizes my skin, it smells like honeysuckle.

I wash my face using a gentle unscented cleanser. I have really soft washcloths specifically for this purpose.

I use some eye cream- look, I am aging, and I would like to say it's with grace. I started doing this to prove to Bruce it would be useful, and so far it's been good. He hasn't tried it out yet.

I use a toner because ugh my pores- I know I don't technically have to, but I like it, okay? Besides, like I said, aging.

Then I use a serum that I got as a gift one year and I cannot stop buying it. I use an antioxidant serum in the mornings, and a vitamin C serum at night.

Once that's in place, I use a nice moisturizer because my skin does what it wants and what it wants in rainy weather is to dry up like the Sahara.

Back to the acne, like- ugh. Acne appears so quickly and I am so mad nobody told me it lasts after your teen years. I use a more intense acne treatment at night, usually, but Tim bought me some of those cute star stickers that get rid of pimples and I am obsessed, so if I feel confident enough I'll slap some stars on my face. Especially if I don't have work. Anyways, back to the process.

So, like, I know a lot of people like to put on face oil but I am constantly fighting my skin so I have to apply it super carefully and lightly. Because my skin is dry and oily and annoying.

I do a lip scrub here, because obviously.

Chapstick. Look, I consider this a step because it is slept on, it is so important and people keep skipping it for themselves. I use a beeswax chapstick that has SPF 15 in it.

Once all of that is done I generally move on to my "second" skincare routine where I apply body lotion and all that. Yes I consider this part of my skincare routine. Your skin is your skin, even if it's not your face.

Okay so once that's out of the way I have to put on sun screen because I need it. Yes, even in the fall/winter! Your skin still absorbs UV rays when it's cold, and I am not taking any chances.

My nighttime routine is really fun and includes a mud mask, but is pretty similar to everything above except with a bigger focus on adding nutrients to my face/skin overnight, as well as treating acne a little more aggressively.

Honestly I don't know why Bruce doesn't try to do it every day, it's really not that complex.

[scoonsalicious]

Mother pookie🩷🩷🩷 ur kitties has risen. My initial plan was to comment on chp 3.3 but I feel like it’s gonna be long😂

To start off, first, even if it’s only one part, it’s amazing! A lot of interesting point for future theories, interpretations and ofc we got to see more on Buckybaby and deLulu so called ‘friend’ship. I gotta say whatever it is that Lenovo did to befriend him is magic because he puts up with her shit 😂 because from the looks of it, Leah did it all the time (when she’s being rude). Just like Bucky said, ‘why do you gotta think everyone is flirting me?’

I actually didn’t get the flirting vibe there, Mya and Buckybaby were just being friendly but clearly deLulu as the name itself sees it differently because hey! Bucky you can’t be friendly with someone else, only me or i’ll throw a tantrum because you make me feel invincible while I was there for you all the time. Anyways poor Mya. Didn’t deserve that. Lenovo needs therapy

Going on next, surprisingly I’m not frustrated when Bucky didn’t tell her the ‘truth’ because first, I have ridonkulous faith on him and second, I think it’s normal bcs I would’ve done the same. It’s either bcs I’m lazy for confrontation, didn’t wanna talk about it or i just don’t know how to tell them properly without it making a scene or hurt their feelings so my best way is to just shut up and agree. Besides, Bucky still cares for deLulu as his ‘bestfriend’ AND also bcs deep down he knows how she will react. If it were me, I would be tongue tied too and just agree with whatever it is that would not spark a fire. Plus, Buckybaby and Major are not a thing yet, it will be a different story if they are.

Now, who the fuck Lenovo think she is calling Major bitch. You are the bitch. Too fucking delusional. TOUCH GRASS. Thank God Bucky called her out. But the ending to their talk? Oh boy, she’s going to change herself into a girly girly gurl. If Bucky told her that he loves worm, she would transform herself into one because and I quote ‘Whatever that makes you happy, Jamie’ — ugh. The things we do for love (in this case, obsession and delusion)

Man, I would love to know how deLulu befriended Bucky. Like for real. What and how?! She literally forced herself into his life but there’s gotta be something she did that made Bucky really really accept her as his ‘best’ friend. One thing for a fact, he had a soft spot for her because again and I cannot stress this enough, she’s his bestfriend, his best girl. In his POV, Lenovo is equivalent to Steve and Sam. That’s something we as readers don’t see eye to eye.

Okay, done with interpretation, going on to future theories. I see there. I see that little star in the masterlist. Major and Bucky are going down dirty lane again and Major, you better suck his soul until he realises how differently Lenovo looks at him. I’m curious though, it’s just that I don’t know how crazy deLulu would be😂 Can mother pookie rate? per 10, Cunthage broke the meter ofc but what about Lenovo?

I don’t think, Bucky would break his friendship with deLulu though, unless if she did do something like crazy crazy. However, Lenovo would, like ‘It’s me, your best-friend or that skank’ kinda thing. After that she’ll throw a tantrum and suddenly had an epiphany which is to make Bucky jealous that backfires because, Bucky is sooooo happy with Major and she starts getting even more cray-cray and plots for Major demise like burning her WarZone or framing that Bucky is cheating on her or the opposite. Since Lenovo is SHIELD, she must have access to the system and use it to gain info about Major. Maybe she’ll contact her ex-husband and shit. But, it will end with either deLulu getting fired from SHIELD, or y’know, somehow she did get therapy and become better?😂 Idk, we have to wait for Mother Pookie’s great mastermind.

Thinking makes me hungry and now I am hungry. So lastly as usual, I love you mother pookie🩷🩷🩷 Aggressive kitten smooches and some cutie Buckybaby gif to make your day!!!

Hi Pookie! <3

Lemme start out by saying that Mya was totally flirting with BuckyBaby, lol. I mean, who wouldn't? Have you seen him?

I mean... come on!

Granted, she wasn't being obvious, which is why BuckyBB had no clue, but deLulu could see it because she is SUPER tuned in to any attention he receives from the opposite sex. Bucky wasn't flirting with Mya, though-- just being a genuinely nice guy and possibly oblivious now that he met Major and can only think about her <3

And you're absolute right about why Bucky didn't tell Lenovo about dating Major. First off, he's nervous-- he literally just met her the night before, so it's brand-spanking new, and he is afraid to make a big thing of it in case it fails; he doesn't want to jinx it, because he really likes her. He knows he's probably moving fast, emotionally, like Steve said, so he's playing it close to the chest until he really has something to tell her. Second, from past experiences, he *knows* how Lenovo will react. They'll have a discussion about it in Chapter Six, but he basically doesn't want her to insert her opinion before he can fully form one of his own.

And yes, absolutely, if Bucky said "I would love you if you were a worm," Lenovo would become a worm. And gladly.

I do want to explore how she and Bucky became bestfriends. Truth of the matter is, I don't know yet! lol

And yes, please expect many chapters with (*) warnings, because these two (Bucky and Major) are rabid for one another, lol. A little spoiler: the next * scene involves one of Tony's sportscars ;) I have not yet written a scene where Major sucks Bucky's soul out through his dick, but I will!

Crazy-scale. Hmmm. It's hard to say, because I would rate Cunthage on as a 20 on a scale of 1-10, lol. Lily's not that bad, thank fuck. She's maybe starting at a 4 but will escalate to an 8 as she becomes more desperate? Like, Cunthage was Villain-Level Crazy; Lily's just like... Regular-Person-Level Crazy?

I can't speak yet to what she's going to do to manifest the crazy. I have many, many ideas and the basic plot outlined, but I haven't written her shenanigans yet! So, you'll have to wait and see!

As always, I love you, Pookie! I hope you're having a great day <3

[moonjxsung]

star i know i dmed u about this but like i cant. i cant. AAADSJDJDADJSDKJDJDDS I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABT THE CONCERT (ISABEL LAROSA + ARI ABDUL GODS WATCHING TOUR!!!) I WENT TO YESTERDAY

I GOT THERE AT THE VENUE AND FOR SOME REASON EEVRYTHING WAS DELAYED BY AN HOUR AND I DONT . I DONT KNOW I WAS DEVASTATED I WAS LIKE SHIT I CANT EVEN SEE THE SECOND PERSON PERFORMING (IT WAS A DUAL TOUR) AD IW AS SO SAD BUT SOMEHOW. BY SOME MIRACLE. MY DAD TEXTED ME AND WAS LIKE "IM SO TIRED PLZ COME USING THE TRAIN" HOLY SHIT. I COULD STAY AS LONG AS I WATN AS LONG AS I COULD DRIVE THE LIE EVEN FURTHER WITH MY MOM. AND THATI EXACTYL DID!!@#!@#!@# I KNOW I SHOULDNT BE SO EXCITED AND HAPPY ABOUT LYING BUT IM JUST. HAPPY I GOT THIS EXPERIENCE INT EHE FIRST PLACE. LIKE THIS WAS THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME. I GET TO GO HOME BY MYSELF, I DONT GET CALLED BY MY PARENTS, I GET TO SEE (ALMOST) THE ENTIRE SHOW, I GET FRONT ROW VIEW?? LIKE IT WAS LITERALLY THE BES TPOSSIBLE OUTCOME AND I THINK PERAHPS IT WAS A REWARD FOR THE SHITTY WEEK IVE HAD THIS ENTIRE WEEK. YETSERDAY SINGLEHANDEDLY MADE UP FOR IT. I LEFT THE VENUE AROUND 11:40 PM ISH??? AND GOT HOME AROUND 1 AM LMFAO how was i not questioned at all idk. i dont wanna jinx it like what if my mom asks me today abt everything i did. but also what the fuck how was i able to get away with such a big lie WHILE keeping it for HOURS???????????? HOURS PAST THE TIME I SAID ID BE OUT?!?!? no but like i cant beleive that these people are REAL like wym iw as in the same ROOM AS THEM? IC ANT. I CANNOT! the first girl (isabel) was BEAUTIFUL like ic ouldnt stop staring at her at all she was GLOWING. the crowd was lowkey fake and dead af tho.....like live in the moment stop staring at your phones tryna get aperfect fancam of her this aint a kpop concert!!!!!!!!! you came here FOR her not a recording of her!!!!!! well i undertsad the recording part bcs i was recordin gtoo but liek NO ONE WAS JUMPING OR SINGING ALONG OTEHR THAN ME BASICALLY AD IW AS LIKE WTF?!?! i love her older music so when she performed one of my favorites (heaven) i almost cried out of joy. but the crowd wasnt evenr ecording or singing along so i hope they were at least admiring her in person bcs she truly looked heavenly. like an angel. the white spotlight was shining down on her and she looked liek she had WINGS bro. i cant believve i got to see this live. INCLUDING ONE OF HER UNRELEASED SONGS THAT IM JUST SO IMPANTIENT FOR. NOW I HAVE AN UNOFFICIAL RECORDING OF THE ENTIRE SONG FOR ME TO LISTEN TO UNTILT HE ACTUAL RELEASE! i actually like her older songs a lot and one of my faves from her next to heaven is closer but she never performed that </3 i guess it was never on the setlist and she never performed it live pensive emoji stop i said i was near the stage nad i ltierally was like i dmed u the video of one of the girls (ari) TOUCHING MY HAND .. WHAT THE FUCL. I ALMOST ORGASMED HER VOICE IS SO HOT SED HELP stop her normal speaking voice made me DIZZY. it was raspy and lowkey deep and so like. so. it was giving dominant. why was she speaking liek that thru the mic do you want me to explode in my pants . someone needs to study me and my infatuation w women that have sexy deep voices like i also am heavily obsessed with fu hua from honkai impact bcs her voice is so hot and Ugh okay lets not get into the voice kink (guess my skz bias if u couldnt already from my previous asks .) BRO SHE STARTED TAKING OFF HER TIE TOO I ALSO SENT U THAT CLIP LIKE IAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOKAJOASKOAKOAOKOkookakokoakoakokaskodaidjaddsk

while i was buying merch before i left (i had to leave before the last two songs from ari, one of them being my faves </3 bcs i didnt wanna risk it any further) i was telling the girl by the stand that i had to be discreet bcs my paretns did Nawt know i was at a concert and some girl w her mom overheard and laughed and we made small talk and her mom was like "dont even worry about sneaking out for a concert, ive done worse as a kid. im glad you were able to give yourself this experience bcs we only live once" and i was like 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 damn some validation from a mother that isn't even mine surely feels nice. ANYWAYS. i got a signed photobook from them! i really wanted a shirt w the tourdates but alas my paretns once again dont know i was at hte concert and they are also religious as fuck and im pretty sure any shirt that mentions god in a nonreligious context would get my ass beat. Im still in disbelief like how did i even get away with this i cant believe it. also im crying bcs in order to drive the "conference" image, i went dressed in a whole business formal outfit LMFAOFOOFO you kow that meme that slike "me at my wedding vs me at some other event" with that guy. yeah that was me. me at my wedding (in my pjs) vs me at the gods watching tour (in an all black blazer outfit)

anyways yeah thank you for the lil pep talk you gave me and your comments on it <3 im glad i took the risk and went and therefore i had to tell you everything about it.

SPEAKING OF CONCERTS I SAW THAT U GOT LOLLAPALOOZA TICKETS!!! CONGRATSSSSS I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN WHEN YOU GO!

- 💫

HELDPDOSKKEMFKFKEKRKJRKTT THE LAST PART OF THIS MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD W YOUR REFERENCE TO THE MEME W THE SUIT AND RHE CASUAL DRESS PLEELWKKSKXKEEO THATS SO REAL 😭😭😭😭 NO but real talk im so fucking glad you went AND that everything somehow worked out in your favor????? YOUR DAD COINCIDENTALLY GETTING TIRED HOLY FUCKKKKK I always feel bad when something happens where I can’t be 100% honest with my parents but like that lady said it’s literally worth it because it’s a once in a lifetime thing!!!! When I first bought tickets to see bts and booked my hotel and flight and everything I told my parents nothing but the bank called about the charges and they found out and I felt soooo bad but I literally regret NOTHING like concerts are such a fleeting thing and you gotta take advantage and GO when you can!!!! Holy fuck dude though I can’t believe you got that CLOSE to them??? AND GOT AN UNRELEASED SONG???? I do know Isabel from tik tok her music’s GOOOOOD (she’s always the audio in those hot ass skz edits djkekekckdkdkd) BUT I CANT BELIEVE YOU GOT TO BE SO CLOSE TO THEM also getting a signed photobook????!:!:!:!!:!:!:!.! YOU WON SOOOO GOOD BESTIE 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 IM SO GLAD YOU WENTTTT I hope you’re able to take advantage of whenever you have special opportunities and that you always get this lucky!!!! Don’t feel guilty about lying either one day these years will be mere memories and you got out of it clean so relax and celebrate bc YOU GOT TO BE SOOO CLOSE TO YOUR FAV FUCKING ARTISTS HOW COOL IS THAT……… ILY BBY MANIFESTING MORE MOMENTS LIKE THESE FOR U IN THE FUTURE 🫶💓💖💞💘🩷💕

[sandmark]

get to know juno better!

what's your phone wallpaper? on my phone, it's a picture of my husband and son. on my ipad, it's birth of venus by botticelli, but with hello kitty as aphrodite. last song you listened to? 360 by charli xcx. i'm obsessed with her new album, it's just too good. also, having rachel sennott in the 360 mv helps LOL. currently reading? venus & aphrodite: a biography of desire by bethany hughes. last movie? minions for the billionth time. what are you wearing right now? my university sweatshirt and baggy jeans. i have an apple watch and evil eye bracelet on my right wrist, and my hair is up in a clip rn. i was gonna wear my medusa necklace, but i chose not to. how tall are you? 5'3.9. i was told i was 5'4 my whole childhood, and now in my adulthood, i was told they were rounding up so i'm actually 5'3.9. piercings / tattoos? okay so. i used to have my nose double pierced, my helix on both ears pierced, my conch pierced on my left ear, my belly button pierced, and my septum pierced. not all at once, but i've gone through quite a bit of piercings lol. currently, i have my earlobes double pierced. i want to get piercings redone bc i took them all out when i got pregnant. i don't have tattoos, but i want some sooooooo bad. glasses / contacts? i've worn glasses since high school. i've thought about getting contacts, but i had a friend who wore contacts and one of them rolled up and got caught between his eyeball and eyelid so :D i remember that whenever i consider contacts. last thing you ate? cinnamon raisin bagel with plain cream cheese and two cups of coffee lmfao. fav color? ugh i don't really have a color i dislike. it depends on my mood honestly. my husband hates when i do this, but i always say like "i'm in a purple mood" or "i'm in a pink mood" lmao. right now, i'm in a green mood, but not like a general green more like a sage green or forest green. i tend to gravitate towards neutrals when it comes to my appearance, i'm not an over the top person even tho i love love love those kinds of looks, but on my person, i stick with simple, neutral colors. current obsession? i've been playing animal crossing: new horizons on and off for the past year or so, but i've picked it back up and i am determined to get 100%. i recently achieved 5 stars on my island and i was really excited about that. do you have a crush right now? like celebrities? rachel sennott, zendaya, tom holland, victoria monet, megan thee stallion, ayo edebiri. in real life? just my husband lol. fav fictional character? obvs cassie sandsmark. the wonderfam in general, i love women. i'm actually a HUGE batfam girl, like dick grayson was my first robin and he's still my fave, but i love the other batboys too. i can discuss bruce's psyche and characterization for hours. i love peter parker/spider-man, too. he was my first marvel character and holds a special place in my heart. iron man is a fave too. but those are really the only male characters i like? i grew up watching them, so that's why. in general, i prefer female characters and sources of media that female-centered. last place you traveled? i dropped my son off at daycare </3 i miss him already.

tagged by: i stole this from @maidmyth. tagging: you :)

[questforgalas]

Thoughts while watching Ahsoka Ep 4!!

(wow was this a rollercoaster, get ready for a lot of caps lol)

Seriously so in love with the set design

I’m gonna say it, I love Rosaria’s Ahsoka, she’ll never top Ashley’s but I love this portrayal of grown up, v traumatized, had to mature way faster than she wanted Ahsoka

Seriously this cinematography and set design is gorgeous

Ooooo mysterious droids

Utterly obsessed we get a live action night sister like so fucking cool

FALLEN JEDI?!? THATS THE EPISODE TITLE???? Fuck me

Gawd Sabine’s armor in live action is so cool

Ugh Ahsoka is so traumatized over Anakin. My wittle babygirl

NO HUYANG!!!!

UM OK POP OFF HUYANG THROWING HAYMAKERS LIKE A CHAMP

Is that the first ever droid brawl in Star Wars??? Absolutely amazing

SABINE USING THE BESKAR

A JEDI AND A MANDALORIAN

I LOVE AHSOKA WITH HER WHITE SABERS

“Stay together. You always did better that way. In my opinion” PARALLELED TO OBI WAN’S “we’ll be fine as long as we stick together” SOMEBODY SEDATE ME OH MY GOD

Jacen 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Oh my god Hera bringing Jacen and pulling the “when you’re a general but for now you’re my kid” line what a freaking boss ass mom

CARSON

Lord almighty Ray Stevenson was so good I’m so sad he isn’t able to enjoy this fucking killer performance he delivered

Oooo great robe drop Shin

Oh my fucking god do I love Ahsoka’s cocky slow eye flick to Marrock she is so good with the quiet confidence (that’s so Obi-Wan by the way)

Yo this fight choreography is fucking sick

AHSOKA PULLING AN OBI WAN AND MAUL IN THE DESERT AYO FILONI I SEE YOU

Fucking Jedi and their dramatics with robes lol

COMING OFF THE BAT WITH AN ANAKIN MENTION OHOHO BALON

“Really? He never mentioned you” AHSOKA YOUR ANAKIN IS SHOWING

Do you think Anakin and Obi-wan’s force ghosts are munching some popcorn positively giddy watching their padawan sass and slay like a legend?

How dare you mention her walking away Balon

Yes babygirl slay

Um such a good tennis match of dialogue here between Balon and Ahsoka???

Oh my god she’s so fucking beautiful 😭😭

Absolutely in love with the quiet of this scene, hearing the hum of the lightsabers and Ahsoka’s steps as she circles, felt so meditative and suspenseful at the same time

This happened so long ago but so funny that Marrock was the subject of every pre-series theory and he ended up being just some dust dude lol

Very cool shot of Sabine’s helmet in the forefront as Sabine fights with the lightsaber in the background

Yasss use that beskar Sabine

“Your legacy and your master’s is death and destruction” Balon come over I just want to have a chat

Ohhhh your padawan is potentially dead and you lose all focus?? Wonder where you learned that from Ahsoka

Smart move Balon going right for the family feels

Oh fucking hell Sabine honestly? He’s a white boy with blue hair he’s not worth it

Love the noises the map makes, sounds like a video game

JACEN’S FORCE SENSITIVE LET JACEN BE FORCE SENSITIVE

THE WORLD BETWEEN WORLDS?!?!? THEY ACTUALLY DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok but the way my eyes immediately welled up when “Hello snips” echoed

Ok the fucking eye acting with the “Hello snips”?? In a split second she went from cool, calm, collected Ahsoka assessing her bizarre situation to surprise, eagerness, and youth in a split second

IT’S HAYDEN’S VOICE OH MY GOD IT’S HAYDEN’S VOICE HAYDEN SAID SNIPS IM GOING TO THROW MYSELF OFF OF A BRIDGE OH MY GOD IM SOBBING

IT’S. ANAKIN. HE. IS. STANDING. RIGHT. IN. FRONT. OF. HER. FOR. THE. FIRST. TIME. SINCE. BEFORE. MANDALORE. I AM A BLUBBERING MESS OH MY GOD I DIDNT EXPECT IT TO HIT ME LIKE THIS OH MY GOD OH MY GOD LOOK AT THEM HIS EYES ARE SO FOND SHE’S SO HOPEFUL JUST AT THE MERE SITE OF HIM I WILL NEVER RECOVER FROM THIS

UGHHHHH and then the fade out to the horns of Vader's theme holy shit Filoni

[the-cryptographer]

2 for Fenris and for Merrill for the question meme!

Best boy and best girl <3 <3 <3

Thank you <3 I feel like I'm just going to repeat all the things I've already said about them in various other places but, whoa-kay, let's go!

002 | Give me a character: FENRIS

How I feel about this character: Ugh, god. Best boy in the whole series. I relate a lot to his feelings of betrayal, his fear of vulnerability, the obsession with his own capacity for evil, and his everpresent need to rationalise and overthink to try to justify or curtail the needs propelling his behaviour. And outside of me, I think his capcity to be adoring and gushy with the people he loves is very endearing. He’s also imo the companion who has the best visible character growth arc in the series. It’s so lovely watching him come into his own identity over his time in Kirkwall, and I love seeing how he changes between the three acts of the game &lt;3

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Anders. Justice. Isabela. Merrill, kinda. In the unlikely circumstance that she gets to do something fucked up enough in the name of protecting him to give him a boner. Hawke, when Hawke looks and behaves in ways that are nothing like actual canon Hawke. (Rant incoming.) Aveline and Donnic, maybe? I feel like I haven’t figured out a way to make it work that’s not just him being their exotic unicorn which makes me want to punch them both (hope you understand) so I can’t actually justify this one. Velanna would be funny too. I have the need to see it happen.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Merrill. God, she is just- a friggin hilariously awful troll to him in canon and I always wanna take it further. Her talking down to this amnesiac, making excuses for the fact that her little brother elf is very stupid ‘forgive him! he only has seven years of life experience to draw from!’ In a terrible, awful, and funny way, I think Merrill having this connection to another elf she can relieve some of this First to the Keeper condescention onto is nice for her. And Fenris having an elf blood mage in his life that the last thing he needs to do is try to protect or even be nice to is nice for him. They’re both great. Five stars.

My unpopular opinion about this character: He’s got the worst canon romance in the whole game. (Rant incoming.) But within the worst canon romance of the whole game, he has the best scene for helping Hawke grieve Leandra. Idk, I’ve been in Hawke’s shoes there, and I wish I’d had someone like Fenris with me. Who knew there was nothing to say to make it better, but was willing to be there regardless.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: (Rant) Literally any overt textual acknowledgement anywhere that Fenris has made Hawke the outlet for his conditioning with Danarius - following Hawke around to protect him, killing people on Hawke’s command, wearing the Amell coat of arms in the romance, voicing his love for Hawke in the terms of possessive ownership (‘I am yours’), and showing unwavering devotion in the midst of the people around them saying dehumanising racist things about Fenris that Hawke makes absolutely no efforts to stop (ie. Carver calling Fenris Hawke’s ‘pet elf’ in the combat commands). Literally any overt acknowledgement that Hawke is a Hightown noble and Fenris is an elvhen foreigner and second-class citizen that relies on Hawke’s goodwill for immediate physical protection against slave hunters. Literally any overt acknowledgement that, in the fenhawke romance scene, Hawke decided that Fenris impulsively kissing them, directly after Fenris faced down his abuser and learned he had a sister, was an invitation for both pinning Fenris against a wall and any sex that followed after. Literally any overt acknowledgement that this is a completely unreasonable situation to expect someone with a history of abuse and slavery and child grooming be comfortable flexing their own agency and right to not consent to sex. Except perhaps after it’s already happened, which is when Fenris finally does so. I don’t know - I don’t even fully blame Hawke for not understanding some of this but... Man, I want Fenris to get ANGRY about some of it. I think he should go a little feral. I want him to unapologetically do more things that aren’t in Hawke’s best interests, but his own. Maybe unapologetically do some things in his own best interests that screw Hawke over entirely.

my OTP: Ugh, yeah, it’s fenders. And I hate saying that right after I’ve gone on that (Rant) up there ^ because I feel like it definitely makes me look like bitchy ship war trash. I swear it’s not like that! (I’m not sure I’d believe me either) Anyhow, yeah, disclaimer is I know Anders is a racist no-boundaries asshole menace. And I think any portrayal of this relationship worth a damn has Anders dial back the aggression and at least tacitly acknowledging that it’s unfair to ask Fenris to take up mage liberation as his cause. But, man, they want so much of the same things out of a realtionship. Like, a connection that fulfills their every cathartic desire for family and domesticity and safety - the safety to be just unreservedly gushy and devoted and adoring with their partner and ‘I’d commit attrocities for you’. They are both sooo intense in their romance scenes. It is TOO MUCH. Too much for anyone but one another, I mean. They should try fucking that out with one another. Also, like, nice tasty foils goodness of two ex-slaves with WILDLY different experiences of it. I think what gets me about Fenris is that he’s clearly internalised a lot of apologist rhethoric about his own slavery. Like the idea that someone sufficiently dangerous should be enslaved for the safety of others. Which you know is something that people in Tevinter said about him, Mr LyriumWolf BioWeapon. I think Fenris is quick to project this POV onto Anders and, in the moments when Anders makes these angry comments about how Fenris is a violent monster, I feel like you can hear Fenris bracing for the conclusion that he thus does not deserve to be free or deserve Hawke et al’s help fighting off his would-be captors. Because I don’t think he has the self-confidence and rhethoric to really argue against that. But, like, even if he’ll talk a lot of smack about Fenris in other ways, this just isn’t somewhere that Anders is going to take things. Because Anders believes that there are inherent rights to being a person and violences nobody deserves. And this is also something Anders has had the self-assuredness and presence of mind to argue for himself and other mages, even when the entire rest of the world is working against him. And that’s something about Anders that I think in the right circumstances that Fenris could be a little awed by and take inspiration from. A little more willingness to burden others with his problems, and to believe in and advocate for himself - that he deserves better, and that he deserved better even when he was at his worst. That’s what the ship is about for me.

my cross over ship: I got nothing.

a headcanon fact: I seem to have a lot of opinions about the books he likes to read. He likes reading nonfiction, history and economics and architecture. And also poetry. He does not like Varric’s pulp novels, lol.

--

002 | Give me a character: MERRILL

How I feel about this character: Ugh, god. Best girl in the whole series. I love how sweet and thoughtful she can be, and how she’ll extend goodwill towards the other companions at their lowest even when they obstinately haven’t done much to ‘deserve’ it from her. But it’s the moments when she’s not being sweet at all that that I really start to love her. Like, the way she’ll bait people like Aveline and Sebastian and Anders and Fenris with these ‘innocent’ questions that are so brimming with passive-aggressive missle-guided criticism (Asking Aveline why she doesn’t arrest them, and whether Aveline’s a bad guard, and watching Aveline get defensive about it, is one example of many that come to mind.) She’s just very cutting and insightful in all the right moments. And... even though I don’t feel like I agree with the general dogma of the game about blood magic, I do think through that conflict they captured Merrill’s own inability to accept critique well. I think it’s something you see a lot in people with a history of emotional abuse like Merrill, where she’s been criticised so much for anything she tries to do, that she’s just become completely unable to engage with any well-intentioned critique anymore, so she gets very withdrawn and stubborn instead. This is actually the last section of the meme I’m filling out and I’m a bit out of steam. I don’t feel like I really did best girl justice with this description but WRAAAAGH- Know that I love her to pieces.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Anders. Hawke. I realise that Hawke is pretty patronising and paternalistic with her in the canon romance, and I’m not sure I can even say it’s less exploitative than fenhawke up there ^  But she is the character that I tend to come around on wanting to romance as Hawke most. Hopefully I find ways to make it work that aren’t, well, upsetting. Fenris, kinda. And Isabela, kinda. As described up there ^ and in the Isabela ask here, respectively. Bethany/Merrill seems cute enough. Carver/Merrill interests me too, but only really in specific circumstances. I feel like the appeal of the ship is them both having inferiority complexes out the wazoo, and all this baggage about their families and not being taken seriously. And then they both come together to act this out on one another and ultimately work past it. Also farmboy hick Carver really projecting the idea of Merrill being this innocent, naive, out-of-her-depth sweet Madonna that knows even less about the world than he does - and then getting slapped with the fact that there are a lot of assumptions he’s making there as a man and a human that are wildly offbase. Haha, get wrecked, Carver! Also Aveline, kinda? It’s hard for me to wholly imagine going much of anywhere without Isabela between them (also because, you know, the Guard’s violences against the Alienage) but I think their friendship is underrated. They have a lot of cute and snazzy banters. I like the one from Mark of the Assassin where Merrill says they should get matching costumes and be crime-fighting partners together. Morrigan, in an angry ‘fuck you shem Eluvian stealer’ way. Dagna, in a ‘magic researchers and science nerds’ way. Pol, in an ‘evil arachnophobia horror’ way. Audacity, in an ‘awful incel tries to posess your mom when you reject him’ way. I have written a LOT of Merrill ships at this point.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Fenris. As per the above response in his section. That said, Fenris actually imo says the worst and cruellest thing anyone says in the whole game, to Merrill. Anders definitely takes the next 4+ spots on the Worst Things These Characters Have Said to One Another List, but #1 for me is definitely Fenris calling Merrill a monster in the immediate aftermath of Pol’s death. What a dick (affectionate).

My unpopular opinion about this character: She is a person capable of evil. That’s what having agency and power are - the capability to do good and evil. That does not mean I think it’s a power that she shouldn’t have and shouldn't cultivate, quite the opposite. So I need more fic about Merrill being sexy and evil (and also taking it up the butt).

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: It’s a shame Merrill’s quests are really so much Dalish infighting. I wish we could have had more information about her actual goals. What she is trying to accomplish with the Eluvian and her work in the Alienage. In her banters we see some pretty scathing opinions about humans and their culture. And I think any work she does organising and helping Alienage elves is ultimately going to be pretty violent and revolutionary, knowing the kind of disenfranchised that Alienage elves are, and knowing Merrill’s own skillset for helping is, um, highly specialised (murder, blood magic, crafting, and more murder). It’s extra disappointing knowing that Justice & Velanna were the original plan for DA2 instead of Justice & Anders. I wish we could have seen Dalish issues be given the kind of weighty treatment that mage issues ended up getting. But, idk... I feel like Trespasser went more in that direction and then just used it to shit all over indiginous cultures so... :/

my OTP: Merders, or Anders/Merrill. I wrote a post once about how I felt these two characters were far more similar than the game wanted to allow, and how I didn’t feel the game gave proper weight to Andrastian Chantry Imperialism as the base cause for both the mage and Dalish genocides. Those are still the ideas I like being at the centre of Anders and Merrill’s relationship. A lot of the vibes from Act 3 in the game are when I really start to feel this relationship because, like- they’re both at that point struggling with the fact that they’ve made huge sacrifices and concessions to seeing through their goals, and neither are sure that they can actually accomplish those goals anymore, and neither really feels like they can be dogmatically assured that they alone are correct or that the ends don’t justify the means they have each chosen. And I like how she seems a bit in awe of his determination and resillience in spite of that. Also Merrill’s nonreaction to TLS, lol. Going off what I said about Chantry Imperialism - I think of all the companions, Merrill easily has the most reason to want to see Anders wipe the Kirkwall Chantry off the face of the damned map. On a more personal note, I like exploring the kind of condescending protectiveness that Anders feels towards Merrill as another mage, and how Merrill both invites this and rejects this at different points, as it reminds her of Marethari’s controlling/sabotaging protectiveness. And also I like when Anders is a racist asshole and harangues Merrill about her differing cultural ideas about things like blood magic, and then she smacks back and slaps him with her own aggressions. Idk, so many of the companions she’s different levels of complacent with when they talk down to her or belittle her. I just kinda love that Anders gets her riled up enough to smack back.

my cross over ship: I don’t think I have one.

a headcanon fact: I don’t headcanon the mage characters actually walking around Kirkwall with staffs most of the time. I think for Anders just casting with his hands works best, both because it kinda plays up the feral abomination angle, and because I think him needing to get his hands on everything suits his boundary issues. For Merrill I imagine her weapon/casting focus of choice being an obsidian knife from her clan. It keeps showing up in all the fics I write about her :’)

[thegeminisage]

ASK MEME

i got tagged by @runawaymarbles, tyvm i lov doing these

What book are you currently reading?

no books atm but i'm actually getting through the entire tag of a rarepair from ff13...only 41 fics :(

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theatres this year?

did i go to a theater this year...? surely at least once. OH YEAH i went to see sonic 2. since that's the only movie i saw in theaters this year that'll be my favorite one

What do you usually wear?

comfy-at-home clothes: tank top, shorts, no-show socks, hair fork, & bandana. out & about clothes: bandana & hair fork if i'm working or my hair needs washing, otherwise i keep it loose. a lot of black pants/shorts and bright glittery monochrome or tye-dye tank tops w/ black or rainbow choker, rainbow earrings, pride bracelet, smiley face ring, rainbow ring, ace ring, and sometimes my triforce necklace. if it's cold i will also wear rainbow arm warmers/socks and fingerless gloves with the pink peace symbols on them. if i'm REALLY dressing up i will wear rainbow tights under a long shirt or short dress. wow sorry this is the longest answer so far i just really love bright fashion!!! i can't believe god nerfed me by making plus sized clothes fucking suck so bad

How tall are you?

5’1 :/

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

i think i'm actually a cancer LMFAO. and stuck with this username...idk about any celebrities but my birthday IS on the summer solstice which is absolutely bitchin' in my professional opinion. i could not possibly have asked for a better date although i do wish it didn't have to fall on father's day sometimes

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

i go by liz which is not my legal first name. technically my legal middle name isn't liz either it's like elizabeth obviously but my first name is cringefail and nobody can spell it OR say it so i just don't tell most people what it is lol. i started going by liz when i was in 8th grade and sometimes my mom STILL messes it up...

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

no BUT as a kid i really really really really REALLY wanted pink hair. as an adult no one can stop me. kid me would be so jealous of adult me's look in EVERY way

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

good at: dreaming. you know how in the 40s-60s most people dreamed in black and white because that was how tv looked? apparently if you play enough video games you'll get so good at controlling a simulated environment you can simply wake up on command. i never completely mastered lucid dreaming but it's a neat trick anyway. bad at: sleeping. exhibit a: i am answering this meme at 2:30 in the fucking morning, and i have not had 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep since december 10. that's like 28 days!

Dogs or cats?

CATS!!!!!!! i like dogs too tho

What’s something you would like to create stuff for?

i would love to draw some zelda art. i just need a new tablet sadly none of the old ones work with my pc

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favourite picture/favourite line/favourite etc. from something you created this year?

UGH i can't post it, it's in the undisclosed project

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

so a very long time ago when we were teenagers my brother showed me minecraft. i played half an hour of it and then gave the controller back and told him i couldn't keep going because i would quite literally never put it down if i did. unfortunately i did NOT show that same level of foresight and self-restraint when downloading the demo of SLIME RANCHER. in my defense i was utterly unprepared for its sheer potency. i played exactly four minutes of the demo before i caved and bought it - $5 was a steal - without realizing how absolutely lethal it is to combine adhd with a farming sim especially during seasonal depression months. this thing has been churning out dopamine so fast my stupid little rat brain can't keep up. i'm frying every last pleasure receptor i ever had as thoroughly as i possibly can. i am begging one of you to physically come to my house and uninstall it from my pc.

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

andor 🙏 sorry to all andor enjoyers but it fucking sucked (except for the prison break)

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

i'm freakishly good at packing things. items into boxes, boxes into vehicles, organizing drawers and closets, etc. at my house we call it "tetrising" since i guess that's a pro gamer move that translates to the real world..................

Are you religious?

no i am disqualified for being gay <3

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

a completed copy of this photo album i'm supposed to be making. i got behind bc i was playing slime rancher :(

ok im tagging @slaygentford @maulthots @brownbicon @machidielontheway @paty-ofarrell @ozymandiasdirge @moogleterra @marcelgerard @elsa12tmnt @smellslikebot @youngbenkenobi and anyone else who wants to do it, do it & say i tagged you!!

[hachinana87]

total rambling about R.Johnson (director)

...and its not good thing (so if you like his work, I don't recommend to read undercut)

look, I liked his debut work("brick"), and brothers bloom. I kinda liked his nerdy obsession for the genre (for the brick, its noir, and them combined with school drama). Not so cynical, I liked the way they were.

But I really don't like Star Wars the last Jedi. I know some of people like this because it denied paternalism of the series, but I didn't think so. And I really dislike male protagonist overpowering female protagonist (who is younger), worse than that, she emphasized him by him taking advantage of her vulnerability. (agh) Also I don't like the way handling Finn, Poe and Rose.

Looking back, I realized, in Brothers Bloom, Bang Bang (Rinko Kikuchi's character) was kinda dragon lady. (btw, I am asian, Japanese) I do not immediately dislike the use of racial stereo types, so I don't say I hate Brothers Bloom either, but after seeing Knives Out, it got me stop.

I initially thought Knives Out was OK, not so new, but fun (but not so funny). Bit so white but in the end Latina girl won, so its OK? but when film got some hype, it got my nerve. ugh. Films deception of Marta was not so good (like as VF interview of de Armas, “Latina caretaker, pretty”). So as Bang Bang.

Brick was not so good morals either, it was bit misogynic, but I know people would grow. however I don't see his earnestness or progress in SWtLJ, and KO, weird nerdyness I liked were gone.

So, it was natural for me to pass Glass Onion, but oh it got Leslie Odom jr in it, aah. I happened to obsessed with hamilton currently. so tell me he is good in this, ahaha.

it is sad that you doubted things you had liked for the decade, but alas, that is the life.

that's that, no conclusion, thanks for the reading.