#ugh i had to sit through a 3 hour meeting today and thats not even the longest one

[mintowls]

what they dont tell u abt being an architect is that u also have to be a project manager. which if i WANTED to do i wouldve just become a project manager, but there is literally nothing i want to do less than being a project manager. unfortunately however. architecture as a job is 70% project management

[aremiies]

DRUMMER BOY.

pairings: drummer!bakugou x gn!leadsinger!reader

warnings: swearing, fluff, incorrect!bakugou (i think), bad writing

other: band au. song prompt (i wanna be yours by arctic monkeys.)

notes: long over due part two, ik, ik. even though the first part of this was a fem!reader, i wanted to make this gn. ok thats it, enjoy <3

part one .

not my gif !

—

it’s been less than a month after the bands gig at rolling red, and they’d all begged you to stay. after the performance, an owner of another lounge had asked for you guys to play at his establishment. of course, you all said yes and now you had three weeks until you played there. all had been going pretty well. you, mina and jirou were working on a new song to sing since you thought repetitiveness with your performances may give you a bad rep. the three of you sat in the break room of the music store brainstorming. it was quiet; the only sound being the soft tapping of the mechanical pencil on the notepad in front of you.

mina broke the somewhat silences when she threw her arms up in frustration, “ugh! i cant think of anything else!”

“yeah,” you nodded in agreement “neither can i...”

“okay, we’ve been thinking about this for a while, i think we deserve a break. c’mon let’s go see what the guys are doing.” jirou suggested after a few more moments. you and mina agreed, you placed the pencil down and proceeded to the front of the store where you saw kaminari, bakugou and kiri beginning to close.

“yo, guys!” mina greeted the three, “need any help?”

over the last two or so weeks, you’d come to love the pink haired girl. her positive, bubbly attitude was exactly the thing you needed in your life sometimes. she was a breath of fresh air when you were stressed, and always knew exactly what to say when you were upset.

kaminari, who’d been sweeping the floor, turned his attention to the three of you,”oh hey guys! you were so quiet back there i forgot about you.” he chuckled.

“he’s right. i kind of forgot you three were here. did you get any good lyrics down?” kirishima added as he finished sanitizing the instruments that’d been used throughout the day.

you sighed, “we got a few lines down, but for some reason we literally can’t think of anything.” you could hear bakugou’s “tch.” from his place by the front door.

“you think you need help?” kiri asked putting down the disinfectant wipes he’d been using.

“yeah actually, do you think you guys may be able to?” jirou asked the trio, to which they obviously agreed.

the six of you then made your way to the back practice room and shut the door, this was about the time you guys had rehearsals anyway, so you were right on schedule more or less.

“okay, so this is what we have so far,” you began, sliding the notepad in the middle of the table for everyone to see.

as the boys quickly read over the lyrics, you watched bakugou’s eyebrows furrow and un-furrow. you watched as he took his bottom lip in between his teeth as if he was thinking; deciphering the lyrics, wondering what they meant.

“well first of all,” the blonde mumbled under his breath, “this is actually... okay progress. you guys have gotten pretty far with lyrics for this to be a new song.”

“thank you!” mina beamed while you just smiled at his attempt at a compliment.

“so, i’m guessing this is a love song?” kirishima spoke up.

you went stiff when you heard kiri’s question. you wouldn’t say love, no, that would be way too strong of a word for your liking. you thought of it more of having a somewhat pining for someone you found attractive; in both ways, not just one.

you felt mina and jirou look over to you, waiting on you to answer. 

you let a nervous chuckle escape your lips, “w-well... i don’t know, i wouldn’t call it a love song-”

“oh, come on. the phrase ‘i wanna be yours’ ? that tells me everything i need to know honestly.” kaminari teased.

“no, no, it’s just.. no. it’s just a song.” you tried to explain.

“the lyrics are nothing short of what someone would write when they’re in love.” kiri joined in on the teasing.

“and if it’s just a song, why are the lyrics so heartfelt? these seem like you’re speaking from experience. who is it?” bakugou chimed in.

mina and jirou kept quiet, though they did have an idea or two as to who it was about. 

“okay, okay, first of all, love is way too strong of a word.” you rolled your eyes.”i prefer a somewhat attraction to said person.”

you felt your face get hotter and hotter with each second the five teens spent looking at you. so what if it was a love song? was it really that big of a deal; not that it really mattered, but you swore that if you had to endure another second of what seemed like judgmental silence, you were gonna combust.

“guys, leave the poor thing alone,” jirou and shook her head and put a hand on your shoulder.

you somewhat smiled in relief.

“let them be in love in peace!�� you heard the girl finish with a teasing tone laced in her voice.

you rolled your eyes once more, “okay, okay! let’s just figure out some more lyrics.” the rest of the team agreed, scooting their chairs closer to the table as you all began to brainstorm.

 after half an hour of brainstorming and making a little more progress, bakugou spoke up, “wait- y/n, do you guys even know what you want the instrumental to sound like? do you have chords written down?” he raised a brow, waiting for your answer, though he already knew what you were going to say.

“uh.. no, we don’t, but we’re working on it.” you assured.

he gave a soft “mhm” before he tilted his head back and to the side before running a hand through his striking blonde hair, sliding the hand down to his cheek where he then began to rest his head in it. 

you watched his movements intently with your mouth slightly agape, wondering just how the hell someone could be so pretty. how he could manage to look so good doing the most mundane of things. asking yourself how could he be so mesmerizing without even trying. 

you snapped your mouth shut the second you saw his crimson eyes meet your (eye color) ones. you felt your mouth get abnormally dry as you watched him look you up and down before meeting your eyes again. you felt as if your heart was about to drop into the pit of your stomach, you were sure the others could hear it beating. it felt as if this moment had been going on for hours when it’d really only been about 15 seconds. you felt tingles flow throughout your body as you watched an almost unnoticeable smirk make it’s way across his lips. a smirk nobody else could’ve possibly seen unless they were staring at him as hard as you were. and that’s when you looked away, finally taking the liberty to compose yourself.

‘since when did any guy have this affect on me?’ you asked yourself.

when you finally zoned back in, you noticed the room was unusually quiet, you turned to look at the rest of the teens who were either focused on you, or bakugou.

oh. they noticed.

“the hell was that-?” mina spoke up, turning her head from bakugou to look over at you.

“were you guys speaking telepathically or some shit?” kaminari chimed in which earned a stifled laugh from kiri and jirou.

“staring contest.” bakugou said with a small smile patent on his lips, his eyes still trained on you features. 

you looked towards the boy once more upon hearing his voice, “yeah. exactly.”

__

about an hour later everyone had decided that it was time for the six of you to go home and get some rest. you agreed, although you somewhat wanted to continue writing, considering you made little progress today. nonetheless, you grabbed your bag and made your way out the practice room. as you made your way to the front door, you noticed that among the rest of the teens, bakugou wasn’t there. 

you furrowed your brows and stopped before turning back around towards the practice room, “hold on guys, i think i’m gonna stay a bit longer.” you notified your friends. 

upon making it back to the practice rooms, you spotted bakugou sitting in the same spot, looking over the lyrics with a pencil in his hand. you watched as he would hum something before thinking it over and writing it down. it seemed that he already had an idea of what he wanted the song to sound like. he seemed content, and you found yourself sitting there for much longer than you had originally planned. 

“hey,” you piped up.

he looked towards the door to find you leaning against the frame, “what?”

“you okay? er... need any help?” you inquired, walking over to the table and taking a spot in the chair next to him.

“i mean, i guess... i kinda got a few more things down.” he shrugged as he slid the notepad over to you and let you read what he’d wrote down.

not to say that you’d underestimated the boy, but you didn’t think that he’d grasp the theme of the song this well; you just didn’t think that it was his type of song.

“you grasped this way better than i thought you would.” you said to him.

he raised a brow, “what’d you think? that i don’t understand feelings of infatuation? love?”

“oh... no, no, no that’s not what i was tying to say at all. i’m sorry if it came off that way.”

bakugou let out a small chuckle, “i’m joking, dumbass. i understand.”

it went silent for a second before you broke it, “so you understand what the song’s about?”

“of course i do, i’m not stupid. i just wanna know who it’s about.” he turned to look at you, “who’s it about?”

once again you felt your mouth get dry and your heard your heartbeat in your ears. you felt your hands get sweaty and-

“you don’t have to answer, y’know. i can see you getting nervous.”

you made a face that said “huh?” before you answered, “i’m not.” you lied. “besides, you keep asking me who it’s about, when i feel like you have a hunch...” 

he gave you a look before chuckling a bit and looking back to the notepad in front of you. though he looked confident, he was sweating bullets. every alarm in his head was going off saying that the song was about him, not that those alarms were wrong, but he kept on thinking ‘what if they are?’ 

like i said: they weren’t.

“and if i do?” he replied.

now it was your turn to seem confident, “i would tell you to tell me who you think it is.” you said as you rested your elbow on the table and gazed at him.

bakugou felt the tips of his ears turn the lightest shade of pink as his eyes set on you and your expression. did you have any idea what you did to this poor boy?

spoiler: you did.

the both of you stared at each other in silence, just as you’d did before. you waited for bakugou to answer you, while bakugou waited for the courage he needed to do so.

“y/n,” he began

“hm?”

“me?” 

you raised a brow, “what about you?” you asked, already knowing what he meant.

“ugh i- the song... is it about me?”

“let’s finish it and maybe you’ll find out.” you tilted your head and gave him a smile before grabbing the pencil from his hand.

__

two weeks later and two days away from the gig, you and bakugou once again found yourselves in the company of just each other as you finalized the lyrics and chords to the song. 

“i really do like working with you.” you broke the silence the two of you were currently in.

bakugou nearly dropped the guitar he was sturmming, “huh? you mean like... the band?”

you shrugged, “i mean, yeah, them too, but when we stay after together? i really enjoy it.”

bakugou swallowed thickly. what was he supposed to say back? it’s not like he didn’t enjoy working one on one, quite frankly it was one of the only things he looked forward to in the day besides going home. 

“i know it’s kind of weird for me to say that, sor-”

“no.” he interrupted.

“what?”

“i mean, don’t apologize. i really like it too...” he mumbled.

a smile involuntarily made it’s way onto your face.

“also,” he continued, “your progress has been... really good... you’re doing a really good job and i just thought you should know that.”

“well that’s only because i had a really blunt, but amazing teacher to help me.” you smiled at him.

bakugou looked at you and your smile, his face softening at the sight.

since when did you become so pretty?

he spared you a glance and shook his head softly, your smile was utterly contagious.

“yeah, yeah. let’s just run through this; make sure everything’s where it needs to be.” he instructed, to which you nodded, grabbed your bass and walked over to him.

you sat down on the floor next to him then looked at him once again, waiting for his cue. bakugou looked back, having to compose himself before he got lost in your gaze.

he then gave you said cue, and the two of you strummed the beginning chords together. nothing except the comforting sounds of the notes filling the atmosphere around you two. and as the two of you continued, bakugou found a smile beginning to grow on his sharp features. he didn’t bother to try and stop it, either.

 why would he? he’d never thought that he’d enjoy these moments with you as much as he did. whenever you two would have these one on one’s, he felt as if time was of no essence; as if nothing and nobody else mattered except the two of you. by the time the song ended, the boy was full on grinning. 

“that was good!” you beamed at him, “what did you think?”

bakugou nodded, “you did- i mean we did great. it sounded amazing.”

“ready to go?” you asked as you began to pack up.

he nodded silently as he did the same.

“you don’t have to talk me home this time, i can tell you’re tired.” you told him before you exited.

“you sure?” he questioned. he would feel somewhat guilty if you were to walk home alone in the dark, but you assured him that it was okay. then, you bid your goodbye’s and you gave him a short hug, eventually the two of you locked up the store and parted ways.

--

the night of the performance, you found yourself backstage with the rest of your friends and the people on stage wrapped up their set. 

“you guys nervous?” kaminari asked as he paced back and forth, he couldn’t seem to keep himself still.

“not gonna lie...” jirou began, “kinda... i mean, this place is much bigger than the last, and who knows who could be out there.”

mina perked up, “you’re right! that’s all the more reason to do our bests. we’ve all worked our asses off these past three weeks, and it shows. it doesn’t matter how good or bad someone else thinks we sound, because at the end of the day, nobody else’s opinion matters but ours. plus we sound fucking amazing, so fuck any and everybody who says we don’t.”

“mina is right. we’ve all made amazing progress, and we sound amazing,” bakugou spoke up, “there’s no reason to be nervous. so... just don’t fuck it up on the day it actually counts.”

a couple of laughs were shared at bakugou’s attempt at a pep talk, and then, as if on cue, your band name was announced onstage, signalling for you all to come on out. you looked over at bakugou, who for some reason was already looking at you, and smiled and encouraging smile. one to which his face couldn’t help but soften at.

when the six of you made it to the front stage, there was a welcoming applause. you all waved at the faces in the crowd before taking your places and getting everything set.

moments later, you were ready, and bakugou was giving his famous drummer count off.

the beat was slow and comforting. you could hear each note that everyone was playing perfectly. you swayed to the sound the instruments made while simultaneously trying to keep the note up on your own. then, you took a step toward the microphone and began to sing the first lyrics. 

your voice come out smooth, as if it was some type of silk. although you were nervous as shit, you made it seem effortless. with mina and jirou’s supporting vocals in the background, everything sounded heavenly; just as you knew it would.

bakugou however, could only focus on the sound of your voice. he couldn’t hear anything else but the sound of you singing. in his eyes, nobody else was in the room besides you and him, and he swore thinking about the current situation in that way made him less nervous. watching you sway left and right as the next lyrics rolled off your tongue readily with your eyes closed and the stage lights shining on you just right? you looked incredible.

“secrets i have held in my heart, are harder to hide than i thought. maybe, i just wanna be yours,”

the sirens in the blonde boys head were once again going crazy, and as he leaned up to his mic for leading vocals, he felt as if his heart was going to beat out of his chest. he was absolutely positive that everyone in the audience could see how hard he was staring at you.

the thoughts of your one on one’s, your smile and you in general swarmed his thoughts, and by this point, he wanted nothing more than to be yours and yours only.

“ i wanna be your setting lotion, hold your hair in deep devotion. at least as deep as the pacific ocean; i wanna be yours.”

the whole time you sang, you felt eyes boring into the back of your head, but you knew who it was. bakugou staring at you as if you might disappear if he looked away may or may not have put a tinge of confidence in your play style as well as the way you sang.

oh, and the crowd? they loved it.

the loved the song, they loved the way you all played. you all could tell they were really enjoying this.

soon the song ended and the audience gave you the applause you all deserved. you grinned as you all made your ways backstage where you all joined in a group hug. 

“oh, y/n you did great !” kirishima complimented you, putting a hand on your shoulder. 

“me?! you guys sounded amazing, don’t give me all the credit !” you gushed.

eventually, the group dispersed, and bakugou saw this as his chance to approach you. he was sweating, and he had no idea if it was because of the stuffiness of the air backstage or if he was genuinely nervous about what he was planning on doing. “y/n,” he started.

you looked up from your phone, eyes brightening as they made contact with bakugou’s own, “oh, bakugou, you did really good out there y’know? you were the main one i heard when you guys did the back-up vocals. you sounded amazing.” you praised.

“oh shut up, it was all you. your voice is gorgeous, y’know.” he stated. 

you felt your cheeks heat up at his words, something about bakugou complimenting you in such a way made you feel warm inside, “thank you. that means alot coming from you.”

“i- uh... i still have one question...” the boy quipped

“go on.”

“who? who was the song about... you never told me.”

you felt a small smirk find it’s way onto your lips, “and who did you say you thought the song was about?”

bakugou swallowed hardly, “m- me.” he said, clearing his throat mid-way through.

“and what if i told you it was?” you implied, inching your face closer to his.

you watched bakugou’s cheeks turn pink before he replied, “i’d say... i wanna be yours.”

you took that as your invite to connect your lips together. the moment bakugou felt your warm lips on his, he didn’t waste another second before he kissed you back. you ran a hand up the back of his head as the kiss continued, and bakugou swore he was in heaven.

once you broke away, you looked at him with a teasing smile, “you be mine, and i’ll be yours?”

“deal.”

--

i had absolutely no idea ho to end this, but i hope you enjoyed <3

[glassartpeasants]

Fragile Hearts

Tomura Shigaraki x F!Reader

Warnings: Angst, Hanahaki disease, sad reader hours, reader is insecure, mentions of death, name calling, this is really sad so read at your own risk

A/N: I wish this shit didn’t hit different. Wanna know why? Probably because i’ve got 2 series going down at this moment. Crying In The Club plus and a Shigaraki one thats still in the making. So we’re suffering together ya’ll.

It’s angst month motherfuckers >:)

~~~

God he looked so handsome today. Those beautiful ruby eyes always found a way to creep into your brain. How could they not? You felt a wave love whenever you stared into them. It always gave your heart joy staring into them.

But it always gave you pain.

Maybe cause you were to afraid to confess? Or was the fact that he seemed to not even show a pinch of interest in you. Or was it the fact that he seemed much more interested in a different women every day. He didn’t even try to hide the fact that he indeed hire prostitutes or escorts. 

You never showed it but every time you saw a different woman leave his quarters it always felt someone had stabbed you right through the heart. You knew he was a reserved and quiet man. Hell he barely talked to anyone if it wasn’t for a meeting or telling someone off. He was a pretty angry and harsh soul. While you, well,

You were that kind of soul that you would have given the shirt off your back to anyone in need. Many villains (mainly Dabi) asked why even bother becoming a villain if you were so kind to them all, in Dabi’s words “Villains are suppose to be rude and horrible.” It was an reasonable question really. The true reason you became a villain was simple.

You held a unruly grudge against heros.

When you were about 8 years old a fire had started in your family home. The flames were so bright. You remembered that day so vividly. The screaming of your family trying to get everyone out. But they were stuck inside while you had managed to go over to a neighbors house and call the cops but when you called and they heard your voice they said,

“Listen kid we have bigger things to do. Next time when you call make sure there’s a real emergency instead of prank calling us.” And then he hung up. The cops, who were there to protect you had hung up on you.

And that fateful call was what sealed your families fate.

After that, you never really believed in the hero system. They had failed you and your family. Which was lead you to villainy. You may have been a kind soul but you would rather use that kindness to help out someone who you feel is worthy. The League of Villains picked you up off the streets, so to you, they were your only family.

~~~

You laid down on the bed that occupied your room, staring at the ceiling. It was nicer then the old bar you guys use to live in but, to you it didn’t feel the same. You were happy for how far you guys came but it just felt like most of the PLF kinda made you sad. You didn’t know why but it did. Maybe was it due to the fact that you wanted it to be just the league? You weren’t fond of these new people. Probably cause they tore you down a lot. 

Your quirk was Energy, your quirk allowed you to use energy of the sun to heal you and use sun rays. But the down fall of your quirk was that it was absolutely useless at night. So you had to rely on your combat skill in the night. That was one of the reasons they didn’t like you, cause your quirk kinda had a big flaw. But they also merciless teased you about being kind to your fellow league members. 

You wanted to scream at them. Tell them off, do something at least but, no matter what you thought you could do. Your confidence faded when you remember that they would probably tell Tomura about your outburst. And since he has a habit of decaying people without warning, you just decided it was best to keep your pretty mouth shut.

You sigh as you get off your bed before changing your clothes to pj’s. You put on the black tank top and pajama pants which were super soft and fuzzy. Putting on some socks you open the door and make your descent into the kitchen. You tried to be as quiet as you could. Not wanting to wake anyone up while you ran to get a midnight snack.

Once reaching the kitchen you turn on the lights and almost let out a scream but took a breath instead.

“Oh geez Dabi, scared the shit outta me.” You laugh before making movements towards the fridge.

“Good, gotta keep that blood pumping.” He chuckled before setting his whiskey down. 

You grab your snack before going next to Dabi and sitting down. You picked up your fork and begun to eat only to almost choke at Dabi’s words.

“So when are you gonna tell the boss you have a thing for him?” You almost choke on your food before looking at Dabi with wide eyes. What?! Was your staring that obvious? Oh god...

“H-how did you know?”

“We maybe surrounded by them but i’m no idiot. I can tell when someone has the hots for someone else. It’s just funny seeing you even try with that gremlin.” Dabi laughed at you while you crossed your arms. 

“So what if I think he’s hot? I know that I’ll never have a chance with him, considering all the woman he has coming in and out of his office.” You say with hints of sadness in your voice. It wasn’t hard to tell. You knew what this feeling was. You knew you had grown a one-sided love for your boss.

“Well if you think that you better be careful.” You uncross your arms with a confused look on your face.

“If your talking about me getting with him I know’ll get my heart bro-”

“No, I’m talking about you getting Hanahaki Disease.” What in the ever loving hell is that?

“What the fuck is that?”

“I can tell you one thing is that it never ends up being in a happy ending. So pray you don’t get it.” Dabi said before drinking the rest of the whiskey and going towards his room.

You furrow your brows as you look down at the table. Hanahaki Disease eh? Well you could probably look it up tomorrow, since you have no missions tomorrow as far as your knowledge. 

“The disease can’t be that bad, right?”

~~~

You wake up to a burning pain in your chest. You let out a little cough before going over to your bathroom to take a shower. This time you let out a louder cough, it felt like something was in your throat. Ugh this feeling was always the worst damnit.

You start coughing trying to get whatever the hell was in your throat out. You pounded at your chest before a little daisy popped out of your mouth. You fell on your ass while holding your throat, rubbing it as you looked at the flower with confusion. 

“How did that get in my throat?” You crawl over a scoop up the daisy. Looking at it with amazement and confusion. This is impossible, how the hell?

Grabbing your phone you opened up google and searched online for any answers on what this could mean.

‘i just coughed up a flower, what the does that mean?’

You wait for the screen to stop loading only to drop the flower and scurry away from it as fast as possible.

No way...this couldn’t be real, how could this happen! You knew you liked your boss but when you read the article saying it can only happen from a one sided love you knew you were boned.

How can you get rid of a love that has taken so long to blossom? Only for it to be your down fall. You kept reading up on it while sitting on the bathroom floor. The more you read the more scared you became. You could die from it if you didn’t get it treated! But the procedure was said to be very risky and highly dangerous. So it was pretty much up to you to get over your feelings for Shigaraki. Yeah that was going to be a pain in the ass.

Time could only tell.

~~~

Day One

You sat at the meeting while your eyes couldn’t help but stare at him. He was so gorgeous, who could you ever compare to the girls he brings to his beck ad call? They were perfect! You just felt like no matter what you did, you never could get the attention of your leader. No, you need to work on yourself! The disease can’t get worse or else-

“(Y/N)! Were you even paying attention?” Shigaraki’s voice boomed causing you to yelp. Snickering could be heard around the table causing your face to heat up in embarrassment. You look at Spinner and he sends you a apologetic look.

“No Shigaraki, I’m sorry. I had something on my mind.” You say looking down. You’ve never been one with getting yelled at. 

“Well get your head out of your ass and pay attention and if your not going to the doors right there.” 

“I’ll pay attention.” You said as you looked down, trying to stop the tears that threatened to spill. Your nails dig into your clothes thighs as you only listen to Shigaraki. You wanted to but all you could hear was sweet voice that you wished was there instead of the one now.

~~~

Day 5

You looked terrible to say the least. You couldn’t believe that is was growing this fast! I mean when you looked into it it said 2-3 months but you didn’t think it would grow so unreasonable fast!

Thinking about it and pushing your panic aside you’ve come to the conclusion that its going faster because of how deep your love and loyalty is for him. It’s so deep rooted that the flowers are growing faster.

Especially the one growing on your neck. 

You’ve looked into what each flower means and the first one which was a daisy meant innocence, purity and loyal love. This time however, it was a rose. You looked it up and saw that it meant girlhood, modesty and secrecy. You knew why this one had popped up. Probably cause of the fact that you’ve been hiding in your room a lot lately. You didn’t want anyone to catch you hacking up flowers. It was already painful as it is so you don’t need any judgement stares.

That didn’t mean your coughing didn’t go unnoticed though. Your coughs were loud enough that Toga and Spinner came to ask if you were okay a couple times. You told them you were and that you were just sick and that you would get better soon.

‘If by better then you mean dead.’

You shook your head before putting your head into your pillow. Effectively screaming into it out of frustration. How in the ever loving hell where you going to get rid of this damn thing if you couldn’t keep him out of your mind?

~~~

Day 14

You felt like shit. Your entire being just felt weak in general. There were bags under your eyes and more little flowers covering your face. If it were glued on and not attached to your skin, you would have thought it as cute. Now? You hated them, you hated yourself. What would your parents think? Seeing you dying over a man that doesn’t love you back. unknowingly killing you from afar.

A knock came at your door and before thinking you said come in. Your eyes went wide and before you could change your mind Dabi walked in and locked the door behind him.

“How long did you think you could hide huh?” Dabi said as he sat on the bed next to you. He may not have shown it but he was worried. He had known your little thing for Shigaraki but he didn’t know it would be this bad.

“I don’t know. How can I get rid of it when I can’t even look Shigaraki in the face. He would think I’m weak.” You said before coughing up another flower. This time blood was seen covering some of the petals. 

“Shit this is worse then I originally thought. It’s at stage three already. Yours is progressing insanely fast. What will it take to realize that he doesn’t love you.” You knew Dabi meant good with his words but you couldn’t help but feel a little bit of your love for him chip away.

Which caused a flower to fall off of your face.

“That’s it.” Dabi said as he picked up the flower and held it in his hands. You look at him with your brow raised.

“Stay here. But before I do what im about to do, just know I’m doing this to save your life understand?” You nod worried about what he’s planning. All you can do is sigh and hold your pillow closer to your chest as you waited to see what Dabi had in store.

~~~

Day 16

You laid in you bed watching some netflix when Shigaraki barged into your room with an angry look. Your eyes widen as you clung to the sheets you had wrapped yourself in.

“So I’m hearing that you love me.” He made it sound like a statement rather then a question. You look all over in the room to avoid his gaze. You shut your eyes only to have your head jerked towards shigaraki, making you look into his crimson eyes.

“Well news flash, I don’t feel the same way.” You swore you could have felt your heart drop in his stomach. Tears rimmed your eyes as Shigaraki looked all around your face noticing all your flowers. Looking into your eyes noticing how they were slowly turning white, making him let out a little chuckle.

“Your pathetic, you let something like love get in the way of my goal? Your so selfish you know?” Your tears were falling at this point. Blurring your vision while you felt a strong pain on your cheek. Shigaraki had ripped off a flower. A pink rose that bloomed on your right cheek.

“I find this hilarious honestly, look at you, needing my validation. When guess what bitch? Your not getting any. And you never will so you might as well tear off all these flowers off your disgusting face.” You couldn’t say anything before pain filled your entire being as Shigaraki picked off every flower that covered your face and neck, leaving you bleeding. 

You feel a light feeling in your chest as you felt like you could breathe again. the flowers that bloomed on your shoulder were slowly withering away. The feeling off something in your throat went away as well as all the flowers that bloomed on your body that was still left had withered and fell off. Your once blurred vision now crystal clear as you looked Shigaraki right in the eyes.

“Look better. Now if i ever see another flower on your face or in your room I’ll dust you myself understand?” You nod your head yes before Shigaraki let go of your face.

You hid yourself under the covers in order to avoid his gaze. Not seeing the little face of sadness that crossed his face.

~~~

“Did you do it?” Dabi asked Shigaraki when he saw him leave your room.

“No shit sherlock.” Shigaraki said as he walked past him only to be stopped by Dabi’s arm.

“It was for the best. She would have died if you didn’t.” Dabi spoke softly  before taking his arms away, Not looking Shigaraki in the eyes.

“I know.”

Shigaraki walked away before going to his room. Once he stepped in he closed the door behind him before falling to the floor. He threaded his hands in his hair before pulling out all the flowers he had taken from your face. Each one of them a different color. A cold feeling entered his heart, knowing that you were suffering because of him.

He had to remain strong. He couldn’t have love be in the way. At least that’s when he told himself at first. 

Ever since you showed up at the bar that faithful day, he knew he had to have you. He knew that he needed you. Why else would his heart beat so fast when you walked past. He always imagined you by his side, sitting on his throne with him. his queen of the villains.

If only he had confessed sooner. If he had he would not have to see you dying in your room because of it. Watching your life slowly slip from your eyes as the days passed by. You were hurting because of his stupid mistake.

And now he had to suffer the consequences. 

He held your flowers close to his face. They smelled of you. Reminding him of the deed he had just done. Tears hit the petals of the flowers, effectively collecting shigaraki’s tears. It hurt. Why did it have to hurt so bad.

A blue poppy was slowly growing on Shigaraki’s neck.

[peggysousfan]

Agent Carter An Au Series

Hey guys! Here is the next chapter :) Technically its chapter 21, but I’m calling it chapter 14 part 2 because each episode is broken up in different chapters. So chapter ‘14′ is episode 3. Weird system, I know lol. Anyway, Hope you guys enjoy!! :)

Peggy's POV:

After I clock out of my shift, I grab my coat, smile at Daniel, and leave to go and see Stephanie. Its been such a  long hard day, and all I want at the moment is a hot bath, to see my daughter, and spend time with Daniel; and not in that order. I knock on the door and Jarvis answers.

"Ms. Carter. I was just getting the little miss ready to go."

"She wasn't too much trouble today?" "Oh she is never any trouble." He says as he hands her to her mother.

"Hello, darling. How was your day, hm?" Steph wiggles around and gurgles her baby talk. I smile and acts as if I knows what she's saying. "Is that so? Well I'm glad you had fun. Now its time to head home, say bye Mr. Jarvis." Steph doesn't actually speak but she does wave her little hands, and that makes him laugh. "Thank you for taking care of her, and give my thanks to Mrs. Jarvis as well for watching her while you were... away." He looks away sheepishly and thanks me for my assistance with getting him out. "Its not any trouble, Mr. Jarvis. I know what I did was right." She looks away, bothered, but he doesn't ask why. I take Stephanie to Daniel's apartment and we sit and wait for him.

"Peg?" He comes home an hour later.

"In here, Daniel!" He walks in to the kitchen and finds us. "Hello." I smiles and walk to him. We meet in the middle for gentle kiss, but linger when we break apart.He keeps his hand on my waist and I lean in again for a little less of a gentle kiss. My hand rests on his arm, and the other on his cheek, never wanting to let go...but unfortunately we have to breath. I stay close to him as we catch our breath and he snogs me once more and I can't help but smile. Before we can continue we move away when Steph starts squealing and laughing.

"I think she knows."

"Perhaps she does. And if so I think she enjoys the change." I says as I press my chest into his. He laughs and leans back down to steal one more kiss; and I'm more than happy to let him. God I can't stand this...I groan and lean more into him. "Dani..." I mumbles and moan into his chest.

"You okay, Peg?" He asks as he rest a hand on my back.

"I'm going to kill Howard if this doesn't end soon." I says, my words muffled in his shirt.

"What'd you mean? The case?" I nod against him. "Why do you-"

"Because!" I groan in frustration.

"Peggy, what's eating at you?" He takes my face in his hands to; and I bite down on my lip as I meet his eyes.

"I...I want to stay...." I says quietly.

"Peg you know you can. I don't care." He chuckles and slides his hands down to my waist.

"I have work to do. I can't stay." I finally meets his gaze and I know he can see right through me.

"Neither can I. I have to work the night shift today. Thats why I came back so early." "What? But Steph-" I turn away with my hand on my forehead. This can't be happening.

"I told Dooley I had to take care of some things at home first, then I'd come back to finish my shift. Peg-"

"Ugh! Can I not get one simple break?" I mumble to my self. "I can't take her with me, Daniel. Not only is she not welcome in the bloody hotel but-”

"Your still working on the investigation into Stark's stolen weapons." It wasn't a question, and I feel horrible fro putting us in this situation.

"Dani...What are we going to do about Stephanie? I can't give her back to the Jarvis's. Mrs. Jarvis is likely asleep by now and then her husband is helping me. I know no one else to watch her other than you." I lean against the counter and Daniel stands in front of me.

"I've tried like hell to say no, but no one else can take it. Krisminski and I are the only ones available for tonight." He runs his hands up and down my arms to calm me; and it's working. "I may know someone who could watch Steph, but that's only if you're okay with it"

"Who?" I stand up straight and he laughs. By standing the way I do, our faces are so close I can feel hi =s breath....but now's not the time for that. He hesitates to answer and rubs the back of his neck nervously.

"Pai..." My eyes widen at this and Daniel immediately reads my mind. "I know I know, you don't know him well, But I do. My dad is great with kids and-"

"And he hates me." I say looking away.

"Peg, he doesn't hate you. He just...was suspicious of us spending so much time together. That and he's afraid of all the gossip." I look up at him and he's turned a bright red. "He'll take care of her, Peggy. I know he will. Yes he knows about...Steph's dad. But only briefly. And I know he won't tell anyone. I swear on my life Stephanie is as safe with him as she is with me."

"I-" Ugh! I shake my head and lean into him.

"Amada-" He stops and we turn to look at Stephanie. She's just said her first word. "Steph...?" We walk towards her and she giggles when I pick her up.

"D..d.." She gurgles and spits over her lip. Daniel wipes it away and she reaches for him. "Dada" Oh my God...She keeps saying it again and again until Daniel holds her.

"I-I, Uhm.." He stutters at a lack of words, although I'm not really sure what to say.

"Darling," I laugh nervously. What am I suppose to do !?!? "H-hes not daddy. Y-you-Bloody hell. Daniel I'm so sorry I-I..."

"I-uhm. I-its fine. She's too little to know who I am right now." He gulps nervously; that makes two of us. I nod and try to slow my breathing. I can't believe she-ugh!

"Right, of course...but, still I-I'm so so sor-" He presses his lips onto mine, and instantly I relax. How does he have so much control over me and not know it? I can feel my cheeks heat up and I look away. "sorry." He laughs and we kiss again. God help me! I lean in and feel my belly twist as if butterflies flapping about. As cliche as that is...its exactly what I feel. Steph giggles and calls him dada again. I try but can't keep the groan to myself. I look up at Daniel and see him turn red.

"She'll learn. It'll just...take some time." He avoids looking at me and I turn away.

"You're right. Time..." Stephanie grabs at his shirt and snuggles against him. "I-I should get going. I have some...things to do." He nods his head and I turn towards the door.

"What about Steph?" He asks. "Are you okay with her being with Pai until you get back?" A nod my head slowly. " Here. Its his address." He write it down on a piece of paper and I tuck it away in my pocket.

"I trust you, Daniel. And if you say Steph will be safe with him...then I'm alright with it." I smile and walk to the door. He calls my name and I turn around, only to find him close behind me. Daniel takes his free hand and slowly runs it through my hair as he pulls me in for a kiss. When we separate, I can't open my eyes, at least not for a few moments. "Goodnight, Daniel..."

"Goodnight, Peggy." And with that, I leave. I walk to the Griffith Hotel and go upstairs to my apartment. Seeing as Jarvis and I were interrupted this morning, we'll have to explore Howard's vault now. I change my clothes and pack my bag, but I stop when I hear a knock on the door. Damn. I throw in my rob to cover my outfit and answer the door, and Angie waltzes in

"Oh, Hello Angie." I say, surprised. I didn't expect her to hurry in " I was just getting ready to-." But she talks over me and talks about work. "A whole 50 cents would be considered an improvement."

"I got a bottle of schnapps and half a Ru-bare pi. Lets see which one makes us sick first." She says excitedly. Although to most that would seem odd to be excited about, Angie and I haven't had time to spend much because of work. that and I don't want her to end up like Colleen...

"Oh that sounds lovely, but I was just getting ready to go to bed.

"It's 8 O'Clock, Grandma. C'mon tell me about your crappy day, maybe it'll make me feel better." She says cheerful, sitting on the bed.

"M-maybe some other time." I say walking away. She gets up and walks to the door.

"Didn't mean to disturb you." I tell her she wasn't but she said she knows a brush off when she sees one. I hate lying but its what I have to do. I follow her out the door and we both run into Ms. Fry and another woman I've never seen before. Ms. Fry introduces us and says the new woman is Dorthy Underwood and is our new resident at the Griffith. She's a dancer that goes by Dottie. She seems nice enough and although I'm flattered by her comment on my accent, I think cheery attitude is a little much for me. I go back in my room and close the door so i can get ready to meet up with Jarvis. Oh how fun that will be. How did I not know he was charged for treason? What did he do? Oh this is going to be a disaster...

I arrive at Stark's house and knock on the door, standing outside waiting for Jarvis. He answers the door and all I can do is look at him. I didn't want to ask, but the silence is killing me. "Do you have anything you want to tell me?" He looks puzzled at first, and then squares his shoulders to stand taller.

"Not at presently...no."

"Very well." I say as I reach down and grab my bag and enter the house."Lets get on with it." The sooner this is all over the sooner I can go and lie down; maybe even take a bath and relax. God knows I need it. We walk to the emptied room with a gaping whole that was Howard's vault. Jarvis says that Stark thought the intruder had advance technology to assist in the robbery. Then again Howard thinks everything requires technological assistance. "Shall we?" I ask, and we gather the gear I packed away and create a pulley system to help up get down the hole safely. When we do, we unstrap ourselves and starts walking. "Charge of treason, out of context, is not exactly what it appears to be. In fact my involvement with you and Mr. Stark could in the face of it, be considered treason." "Indeed it could."

"I don't need to know the details of your past Mr. Jarvis" I lie. It bothers the hell out of me to know I'm working with someone who keeps secrets.

"Thank you" he says as we walk along the tunnel. "Authorities say they found a man hole from here. They say the thief escaped through there."

"Carrying hundreds of pounds of equipment, seems unlikely. You said it rained the nigh of the break in? New York is one of the last cities to still use its sewers from storm water. All Mr. Branis would have needed was a raft and a forecast." I explain. "He could have floated his stolen treasure all the way to the sea." On our way through the tunnel to the end, Jarvis and I talk. He's surprised about my knowledge on sewage, but I served and spent a winter down there, so I know about it. I mention we all have secrets, implying to him, and he agrees. I've tried, I really have, but I need to know. He says that he forged his general's signature to get Ana, his now wife, who is a Jew, to safety. Howard helped them escape to America to be free.

"That sounds like a story." I say as we reach the end.

"Another time perhaps." I use binoculars and notice a boat with the heart symbol Branis left behind. I let Jarvis have a look and then we drive to the docks; now we know where we need to go.

Daniel's POV:

After Peggy leaves I grab everything I need for Steph and head over to Pai's house. I hope he's still awake...When we get there I knock on the door and he answers a few moments later.

"Daniel? What's going on?" He looks between me and the baby and steps forward.

"Pai, I need your help with something. Peggy has to work late today, and so do I. Stephanie can't go back to her sitters tonight so, I was wondering if you could..."

"You want me to take care of her? Is her mother okay with this?"

"She is, yes. I told her I couldn't watch Steph because I had to work and I suggested you might be able to. I know you to don't know each other well, and she was...hesitant at first. But she trusts me and I trust you." He looks away, thinking.

"Okay, I'll take her." As I hand her over she starts to fuss.

"Is she keeps doing that just give her this." I hand him one of my old vests and he looks at me suspicious. "It'll keep her calm. Also, she is uhm...talking a little, so, yeah. Theres that."

"Daniel. I've raised 3 kids and helped with my grandchildren when they were her age. I know what I'm doing. She'll be okay, you know that."  

"I know, it's just...never mind. I have to go. Peggy will come by later to pick her up." I explain and then I leave. As I walk away I hear her say it.

"Dada..." And then she cries. God I hate leaving her like this, this is the second time I've done this. I hope she doesn't hate me later. When I get to the office I sit down at my desk and Krizminski brings over his chair and sets down bags of food.

"I bought us some dinner. Don't get the wrong idea, though. Chief told me too." I laugh.

"Yeah sure, whatever you say Krizminski." I reach into the bag and grab a sandwich. Mmm its a really good sandwich. Its from the same place Peggy and I ate sometimes when she was pregnant. At times when we both were too tired to cook, we'd get this.

"Alright I'm headin' out. Make sure the chief gets this when he gets back" Thompson says as he places a file on the desk.

"You got a hit on my passports?"Krizminski. says as he reaches for it. God it's gonna be a long night...

"Prince's name is Sasha Demidog. And you know the rest of the story."Thompson says.

"Let me guess." I speak up. "He was dead before he died? Battle of..wherever." I take another bite of my sandwich as he corrects me and says Fenial. He leaves with a joke of how I'm the brains of the night shift, yeah and a lot more. But they don't know that. Krizminski. goes on complaining how Thompson could have covered his shift because he found and helped with the passports.  "I thought you were gonna ask someone else, even Carter."

"I was. I did. She was acting  like I was waving a sock in front of her face."

"I'm sure you were polite and respectful as always." I say sarcastically. I'm not sure this guy has a single polite or respectful bone in his body. He stops messing with his sandwich and looks at me.

"You sweet on her, Sousa?"

"Don't you have enough women in your life to worry about?" I laugh.

"Alright. Let me give you a nickles worth of free advice, pal. Give up." I look over at him and see he's serious. "No girl's gonna trade in a red, white, and blue shield...for an aluminum crutch." Damn, I never thought of it that way...

Peggy's POV:

Jarvis and I get in the car and drive towards the docks where the ship with the heart symbol floats.The lights are still on which means someone is using it. I load my gun and step out of the car. Jarvis follow, slightly pouting because i don't have a gun for him, and we board the ship. When we get inside we find a load of crates with Stark industries on as the label. Jarvis and I take the netting off and look inside. Apparently this box has a back massage that cause involuntary muscle contractions. I'd hate to learn how they discovered that...

"Alright, lets call it in." I close the lid but Jarvis stops me from walking away.

"Ms. Carter You cannot reveal that you've recovered these items." He goes on the explain how they will not respect me, but instead use this to tear me down. Bloody hell! "If you wish to clear Mr. Stark's name, you must do so from the shadows."

"There's a phone box across the street. Call it in." I say. I know one person who could deserve a win today, if it not be me; then defiantly him."And for God's sake don't let Krisminski get hold of it. Sousa's working the office tonight. I'd rather him get the credit than anyone else." Jarvis gives me a small smirk and walks away. I'm not sure what that was meant for, but I don't like it...

[kpopnstuff1]

Unrequited Love

AN: Hope you find this Namjoon x Reader fic intresting. I worked hard on this and I hope you like it. Sorry if there are mistakes. Please send feedback and or requests. BORAHAE <3 <3 <3 <3

Pt2 Pt3 Pt4 Pt5 Pt6 Pt7 PT8 Finale

Being out of school and into the real world had always scared you. Even if you were used to it. You had started working since you were 15 and you had always wanted it that way. Your family came from a lot of money, old money to be exact. Your great great something found oil somewhere and well the rest is history. You honestly didn’t care. You thought everything was so stupid. Your family always cared about social stance and stupid money related stuff. That is why you had left the U.S and moved to Korea. You wanted to separate yourself as much as you could.

You were lost in thought and had almost missed your bus stop. Today was your first day at a new job. You had applied as a secretary while you finished your schooling. It was going to be tough but you knew you could do both. Besides you weren't the only secretary. There were 2 secretaries above you. Apparently the CEO of this company needed 3 in order to function. You didn’t bother getting to know him since one of the other secretaries had told you that they would tell you everything you needed to know about your new boss. You had heard horror stories on how rude and how cold he could be so you had prepped yourself this morning. Making yourself feel so confidant, no one could make you feel bad.

“Ah you must be Y/N! You’re early, I like that. My name is Sunni and I’m Mr. Kim’s main secretary.” she extended her hand and you gave it a firm shake. “Tiffany is upstairs with Mr. Kim right now. She will be filling me in today. Poor girl.” she said as she gave you a sad look. “Okay follow me, I’m going to take you to our office.” You quickly followed behind. “We have an office?” you asked with a shaky voice. “Yes we have a small office. Mr. Kim gave us that room so all his things can be in one place. Plus that way all his paperwork is safe from prying eyes. It’s not too great but it’s better than a small desk in the halls like everyone else. Plus when Mr. Kim is busy outside of the office he has other secretaries. That’s when it gets fun because we can talk and listen to music while we work in our office. “Everything seems very fast paced. I’m kind of worried.” You laughed nervously as she opened a door. “Don’t worry, you will do fine. To be honest you have the easiest job out of the three of us. Anyway, please sit down.

You walked into the office, bigger than you had expected. There was a small grey couch and white rug in the center and three desks along the walls. The walls were a mint color and had twinkling lights on the wall. “This is so nice.” “Thank you Y/N. I hope you like it. Feel free to add things here and there.” you nodded.

It had been 2 hours since you had gotten there and she had gone over all the rules with you. You signed privacy papers and papers about falsification , you felt like you had signed your life away. “Mr. Kim is very careful huh?” “yes he is. That’s why he has a total of 5 secretaries. He keeps his life organized.” “Can I ask you a question Sunni?” she nodded putting all your papers in a folder. “So we basically went over everything he likes and how he is and all the rules. But what exactly am I going to be doing?” “oh Y/N, how silly of me. I forgot to tell you the most important thing. You will be taking care of his meetings. You will Schedule in any meetings that he might have and also schedule in his trips for said meetings. Also when he has meetings here in the office you will take notes for him. Any more questions?” You shook your head. “Let's go meet Mr. Kim.” your stomach turned. You were nervous to meet this man.

“Mr. Kim I would like you to meet Y/N. She is your meeting coordinator.” You bowed and he nodded. “Thank you Sunni, you can step out. I have some questions for miss Y/L/N.” She looked surprised as she left the room. “Please, sit down.” you sat down quickly. He kept looking you up and down, and that had made you so nervous. You felt your blood rush to your face and thinking about it only made your legs begin to shake. “So, why did you come to work for me miss Y/L/N?” “Well, I need a job to pay for school and i’m an organized person so I thought I would be great for this job.” He nodded. “I think you are in the wrong profession. You should be an idol or a model.” You were surprised by what he had said. You didn’t know how to respond so you just stayed quiet. He turned around to look at you. “You don’t think you’re pretty he?” he asked as he leaned on the desk in front of you. “I, ugh. I guess I am a little.” He smiled and it made you melt. Mr. Kim Namjoon was so handsome but you tried not to look at him or you would blush. “Pretty and modest. Hard to find these days. May I ask you something miss Y/L/N?” you nodded. “Do you have a boyfriend?” He asked as he sat next to you to rub your thigh.

“That is something private, but if you have to know. No I don’t.” you almost screamed. You had clearly cut the mood in him because he quickly stood up and walked to the door opening it for you. “That will be all, I will see you tomorrow.” he said without looking at you. You walked out and slammed the door. Maybe it wasn’t the smartest thing to do on your first day on the job, but he had crossed the line by asking you personal stuff and touching you.

The day had been so long, and you were exhausted. You never imagined being a secretary would take this much out of you. You arrived home and took a shower. When you were about to sit down to eat your phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Y/N! How are you?”

“What do you need Mother?”

“How rude of you honey. Who says I need anything.” you sighed

“Because mother, every time you call me it's either to yell at me or because you need a favor.”

“Fine, I’ll get to the point. We have an emergency and we need you to step in. I know you hate these things but everything is set all you have to do is go and sign the papers.”

You rolled your eyes at your phone.

“Mother, I moved here to avoid all this shit. Why do I have to do it. Can’t my father come and do it.”

“We are on our way to the airport now but i’m afraid we won’t make it on time.”

You hated dealing with their important stuff. But at the end of the day they were your family and you were not about to let them down more that you already had.

“Fine, Where and what time?” the line went quiet. “Mother?”

“Well, were you work at 9. With Mr. Kim Namjoon. And honey please wear something nice. Something better than today.” she quickly hung up.

YPOV

What!! My mother would pull something like this. She had probably sent the investigator to check up on me and she took the opportunity to send me on her errands because of that. My mother had the habit of not talking to me for months but every so often she would send PIs to check up on me. It was annoying really, but it made me feel safer knowing they kept an eye on me.

I lost my appetite so I went to my room to look for something to wear. I found a maroon dress in the back of my closet and set it aside for tomorrow.

I shot up disoriented, I quickly looked at my phone. I had slept through my alarm. I quickly got in the shower and changed. I was going to miss my bus if I didn’t hurry up. I put on some makeup and brushed out my hair. I threw on some nude heels and grabbed the only designer bag I had brought to Korea. I caught a glance at myself in a hall mirror. It was funny how clothes made me look like a totally different person. The person in front of me looked  like a million dollars. I laughed and quickly walked out of the building. “Miss Y/L/N.” “Oh my gosh, Sebastian! I haven’t seen you in ages.” “Hello to you too. I missed you Y/N. How is my munchkin doing?” Sebastian had been my driver since I was 11 so when I moved he had stayed back in the U.S. Sebastian was basically my father. Him and my nanny Marisol raised me while my parents were busy doing other things. I started to feel the tears coming. “Lets go Sebastian. I’m going to be late.”

“Thank you for the ride Sebastian. Lets eat lunch later okay.” he nodded and waved as I scurried into the building. I walked up to Tiffany’s desk a little shy. “Hi Tiffany, is Mr. Kim available for his 9 o’clock?” she was busy typing something in. “yea, but they are in his office now.” “who is that?” I asked a little shocked. Had I gotten the wrong time from my mother. Tiffany looked up “woah, Y/N you look….so different.” a nervous laugh escaped my mouth. “Well I’m supposed to be meeting him on a non work related thing.” “wait, are you the Y/L/N daughter. The millionaire family from the U.S?” shit, well there goes my job. “Yea, thats me. But please don’t change with me just because of that.” she smiled and nodded. “Well I believe your mother and father are inside. You can go in if you’d like.” “Thanks.” I said a little confused. I knocked on his office door and walked in without getting an answer first. “Ah the woman of the hour.” I rolled my eyes at him. He was looking out the window not even paying attention to me. “Mother...father. What are you doing here. I thought you weren’t coming until later tonight.” I said as I took a seat next to my mother. “Why would they not come to sign you over to me. It's the least they can do for all the trouble they have caused me and my family.” I shot up in my chair. “Sign over? What do you mean sign over?”

Namjoons POV

It's the least they can do for all the trouble they have caused me and my family.” I turned around. Right as I was going to say something I lost all track of thought. Y/N looked stunning and it shocked me a little. Yesterday she was cute and all but today she looked stunning, so beautiful. Almost angelic in a strange way. I sat down and tried to explain everything. “You see, your father here tried doing bad business with one of my competitors even though he has a contract with me. And I won’t except it. I’m going to blacklist your family.” “What! You can’t” she slammed her hands on my desk. She was inches away from my face. She smelled so sweet. “I Was going to blacklist your family, but your mother here saved the day. She came up with a better plan.” Y/N turned around and gave her mother a confused look. “Honey, you see we had to do this. We can’t ruin everything because of your stupid father. You have always done what you wanted and we let you. So you have to do this for us. Please just this once.” “Mother what are you talking about. Can anyone tell me what’s going on.” Her father finally spoke “You are marrying Namjoon. His family will spare us if you marry him.”

NPOV

You couldn’t believe what was happening. How could your parents sign you away without remorse. You snapped out of it and hit the first thing you saw, which was Namjoon’s face. “You two are done here. Leave me with Y/N.” Namjoon said in a stern face. Your parents quickly got up and left without speaking a word. “If you are going to be mad, be mad at your parents. Don’t take it out on me.” he said as he grabbed you by the wrist and lead you to the chair. You couldn’t help but begin to cry. You knew in your heart you wouldn’t deny the proposal and that’s what made you sad. That even though your parents didn’t  give a crap about you. You still cared about them and of course your two younger siblings. “Look, I’m not as bad as you think. I’m really not too horrible. Yes I have my temper and maybe i’m kind of cold with people but we won’t even see each other much.” Namjoon said as he rubbed your shoulder. “Why me? Why marriage. Do you want someone to fuck then let's do that. But don’t make me give up my opportunity to marry someone that I love.” You started to reach for his pant zipper but Namjoon stopped you. “Look, to be honest i’m stuck in this just as you are. My parents arranged this with your parents. To me it's not a big deal because you’re beautiful and well I do what they want.” he stayed quiet. Almost showing you he was sad. “Why would they arrange something like this?” you asked as you got up to get some water. “I’m getting older and My father is sick and dying. When he leaves us he will leave everything to me. It looks better if i’m married. The investors will feel more secure in me managing the family companies. I don’t have time to mingle and go out so this is just easier for me.” You didn’t like any of it but you knew it was the right thing to do. “I understand, I will do it. Not for me, but for them. Even if they don’t think about my future I think about theirs and my siblings. “So how should we get to this?” “Well, you can hire anyone you want and plan the whole thing. I don’t care. We need to do it as soon as possible so please keep that in mind.”

“I don’t care about planning anything.” He rolled his eyes. “Okay I will have my secretaries plan everything. After the wedding you will move in with me. We have to keep up with appearances. Speaking of which. You will no longer work here. My wife will not be a secretary. And you might as well forget about school. You’re going to be a housewife like all the women I my family.” You were going to start fighting, but you had no strength. You simply nodded and walked out of the office. In that short amount of time your life changed. And not for the better.

[bolbianddolanhouse]

BNHA self insert AU

Nani the heck is this? read here!

Chapter 3: Itati the Suspect

I have survived 7 weeks now and I want to breakdown a little to help me cope with the stress of midterm projects and exam. Kirishima still doesn’t trust me, Bakugo addresses me by my last name now, Iida is trying to justify his past mistake still, Midoriya is pestering me about lucha libre, Todoroki is about one more ‘senpai’ away from another ass whoopin, I’m still not friends with any of the girls of 1-A and for some strange reason, Tokoyami and I are becoming friends.

-Thursday, in Stats and Strats class with Jin-

“UGH! Ita end my suffering!”

“I can’t, I’m too mentally exhausted to do anything!”

“wonder how Mimi is doing?”

*cut to Mimi in her history class*

“Ok I know Russia is an axis power BUT Putin can still eat my ass”

*cut back to Jin and I in class*

“Oof just 20 more minutes Jin”

“AaaaaHHHHHhhhhh!”

The class joins in on the groans of agony until class gets out. I pack my stuff and think about if I had the mental capacity to go through one more day of that damn hero class before the weekend. I get a text, its from Iida

[Hello Palma-san! How are you feeling? If you ever want to talk about what’s making you sad, I am here for you, ready to listen :)]

“wow Ita, that glasses boy won’t leave you alone huh?” said Jin as we walked out of the classroom.

“ugh he’s just texting me because I cried in the middle of hero class because I was so stressed and I couldn’t hold it anymore”

“oof big mood”

“yea it was so embarrassing I was almost tempted to teleport out to my car to let it out”

“I dunno Ita, kinda looks like that boy likes you”

“hahaha very funny Jin! what makes you say that?!”

“bitch you pretty! and smart,” Jin said, not joking “also he’s like right there, low key spying on us”

I turn to where Jin is pointing and there he was, hiding behind a pillar. Didn’t even try to find a better hiding spot.

“Oh hey Palma-san! and fellow student! I was just um” said Iida very nervously “I was just around”

“you were just around the Intelligence wing?” I said, pinning him to his lies “right around the time Jin and I walk to the parking lot?”  

“precisely! um now that I’m here, are you alright?”

Dammit! I got emotionally cornered, I gotta slide in my excuse and leave because I don’t want to talk about it. Before I could even start talking, Jin speaks up,

“Actually, she was going to head home and I’m going to find Mimi and do some hood rat shit” Jin said flashing me that devilish smile. He’s making me talk to him for his own amusement!

“Um yea, I was gonna go home! like, right now, excuse me Iida-san” I said to counter the whole situation “I bet you want to go home too”

“oh then lets walk home together!”

“don’t wait up! Have fun you two” Jin said portaling himself to Mimi. I hated him so much at this moment.

“Sooooo Iida-san, I assume you wanted to talk because of my random crying huh?”

“yes! I was concerned that something happened in your family or somebody said a hurtful comment about you before class and you got sad.”

“well this time is was different”

“oh? how so?”

“when I get really stressed, I cry to let out my frustration or in extreme cases, I throw up”

“stress crying? do you have alot of things to get done?”

“yea BUT once I go home and finish my paper and my portion of project I’ll done and I’ll be much happier!”

As I say that, we reach the parking lot. Then I remembered that he doesn’t know I drive and have a car! It’s been my dirty little secret I’ve kept from everyone in 1-A. Only Mimi and Jin know and they don’t care that I have one but every one else would. 

“Um Iida-san” I said softly “can you keep a secret?”

“oh course! you have my word!”

“you have to promise me” I say as I get his chopping hand between my hands “absolutely nobody should know about this! it can ruin me but I trust you to keep this for me.”

He looks at my hands holding his and how warm, soft and small mine were. He brings his other hand to the others and nods, locking in his promise. If he wasn’t so annoying, I would’ve kissed him right then and there, but not today. I take my hand away and reach for the hidden pocket in my coat and take out a set of keys on a wristlet lanyard.

“thats alot of keys” Iida said softly like I had no business having so many keys.

I then flip to my car key and point it toward the parked cars and click on the unlock button. A tan colored Jeep beeps and flashes its lights in response. Iida’s eyes widen.

“you have a car?!”

“yea I got special permission not only bring the car over from America but also get a Japan drivers license” I say as I pull out my drivers license.

“wow, what a strange and unique life you’re living” He says in amazement as he looks inside my car “your secret is safe with me!”

“I’m glad I can trust you with this” I say with a warm smile of relief.

We say our goodbyes and part ways to go home. I finish my work just in time to have 5 hours of sleep, which is the most sleep I’ll get in the school week. I prep my outfit for my civilian clothes conceal and carry midterm and sleep. I wake up feeling like lechuga, fresh and pretty. I get to school and do my thing, I feel like I passed my midterm but barely. 

-walking down the hero wing-

“I’m telling you All Might! She has incredible power that she’s undermining” said Midoriya to All Might “I don’t understand why she doesn’t want to be a hero”

“Young man I’ve heard of her and while Midnight didn’t tell me all the details, I want to meet this brave young lady” All Might exclaimed “shes a hero in her own respect!”

I’m listening to all this as I turn the corner and think great another group against my decisions that I didn’t make for myself. Oof. 

“Look thats her!” As I’m mid-sip of my coffee.

“Oh! Hello fellow American! I’m All Might, pleased to meet you”

I chug my coffee in dominance, “And I’m a hot dog wrapped in a burrito, Katya” I said to confuse the two before teleporting to class.

-inside the classroom, while the All Might and Midoriya encounter-

 “I still don’t trust her bro” said Kirishima to Denki and Sero.

“I don’t see how her being intelligence makes them untrustworthy” said Sero

“Yeah! she’s so nice and did you see her put Midoriya in a submission knot yesterday?! so powerful too!” said Denki

“Can’t you see you knuckle heads! she’s a spy to gather information about us for an outside source!” Kirishima said “why would somebody clearly powerful enough to take down the class sitting down and smart enough to gain the trust of the pro heroes, be in this school?”

“you know what, now that you mention it, she’s always with those two other kids.” said Sero “the big Russian one and the thin one with the portal quirk”

“they’re in on it too! The Russian is the guard and lookout, the thin one is the transporter, and Palma-san is the messenger and assassin.”

“Guys you’re being absurd!” Iida cut in the conversation “Palma-san is just a student here, willing to learn, like the rest of us!”

I teleport in. And I sigh that there’s still people that won’t leave me alone. I turn to walk to my desk and I see everyone staring at me, and I don’t understand why.

“um hi everyone!”

“you look so...”said Aoyama

“CUTE AND PINK!” squealed Mina as she ran up to me for a hug.

Oh right! I wasn’t wearing my uniform! I was wearing my pink pom-pom dress with pink iridescent long sleeves and jelly boots to match. I get alot of compliments as I get to my seat, Kirishima was eyeing me as I moved. I’ve gotten use to his staring, I wasn’t hiding anything. Class starts and we take our midterm, easy peasy for me!

“you can leave if you’re finished with your exam Palma-san” said Aizawa as I got to the front to turn in my exam.

“oh are you sure? Is there no lesson after or announcement?”

“well, there is an announcement but it doesn’t affect you if it’s opposed” he said while looking over my test, “come by after school to the classroom to see if it got opposed or not”

“okay, Ill do that, thank you”

I get my things and make my way to the Intelligence wing, I wonder what the announcement was? I catch a glimpse of a tall man in a yellow pantsuit, fuck its American stereotype man. I teleport before he could see me, little do I know that I was being watched and followed by Kirishima.

“what is that girl up to?” Kirishima thinks out loud, “what kind of person doesn’t want to be around All Might?! A person that doesn’t want to get caught with their facade!”

He heads back to class and I wait for Mimi and Jin to get out so we can eat and plan out the weekend. There’s going to be an Intelligence student kick back on Saturday and we need to coordinate. We eat, plan and go about the rest of our day.

“Ok I’m heading to the hero wing, see yall tomorrow”

“wait why?” said Mimi, unwrapping her hard candy.

“Because she’s meeting up with her glasses wearing Prince~” taunted Jin.

“eww no! I have to meet with sensei” I retort, though I don’t mind the idea of Iida being my boyf, he’s changed since our incident.

I part ways with Mimi and Jin to head to the classroom. I remembered yesterday’s events and how he looked at my hands, his hands were warm and his gaze was soft and-

“Well! look who’s here!” said Kirishima, breaking my train of thought.

“oh Kirishima! you startled me” I exclaimed “I was on my way to the-”

“save it, spy!”

“Spy?”

“DON’T PLAY DUMB I know why you’re here, you’re a spy sent by the highest paying villians to take down our hero school”

That couldn’t be farther from the truth.

“I don’t know what kind of movies you’ve been watching but I’m just some foreigner that barely made it in” I calmly said “if you would excuse me, I have to talk to Aizawa sensei”

“I don’t trust you, Palma-san, or your friends” he said as I walked past him.

I get to the classroom and Aizawa asked that if I’d like to participate in the Sports Festival as a competitor. I politely decline the offer as I am not interested in taking part. I then head to my car and I see Iida, waiting for me.

“So what did you say?”

“oh, I said no thank you” as I unlocked my car.

“what?! why? its such an honor that you even got the invite”

“yes I understand that but I’m more of an observer during these things, I’ll be rooting for you”

“I see, well, have a restful weekend Palma-san” he said “you look very lovely in pink.”

I tried so hard not to blush and think about that comment all evening. It’s not like he WANTS to be my boyfriend, he’s just trying to be nice because I’m struggling emotionally. Yea, thats it! It has too!

*cut to Iida talking to his brother*

“I like her Tensei but I don’t know how to tell her I want to BE MORE than friends”

“Tenya I don’t know what to tell you! I don’t have a girlfriend either” said Tensei “maybe if you just leave flowers with a note confessing she’ll get the hint?”

“Its worth a try, I can’t contain my feelings for her like this much longer,” Iida said, trying not think about her “is it wrong of me feel like I found my wife?”

“those are some strong feelings, but if you don’t speak up and treat her right, you could lose her to somebody else.”

*cut back to me getting ready for bed*

The weekend plays out so well with chores getting done in the day and partying it up saturday night until sunday morning. Like we planned, Jin portals us to a Mcdonalds then home. I get home and I’m a mess but happy that I didn’t stay in. Sunday was my rest day and I got my work done for the next day, the start of the chillest week of the semester.

-Monday, in the 1-A classroom before ethics class-

Iida is taking out a folded note with ‘Palma’ on the front in his best handwriting. Today was the day he was going to confess but was extremely nervous. He takes out the iced coffee from his bag and stands up to walk to my desk. Others notice him,

“I didn’t know you drank coffee Iida-kun” said Midoriya

“oh no, its for um, Palma-san” He said softly.

“You got her a coffee? You lost a wager too?” Todoroki said confused.

“I didn’t, I got it for her because I wanted to” he said “she deserves a treat after a very stressful week last week.”

“ok then so-” said Hagakure, snatching the note from Iida’s hand “what’s this? Looks to me a confession note.”

“Please don’t-”

“oh WOW it is! You really like her! How romantic of you to get her coffee and ask her for a coffee date in the note.” said Yaorozu.

“please don’t say anything! I want her to feel not pressured to like me back, I care about her feelings and freedom of choice.”

As he got the note back and shakily made the walk to my desk, I walk in.

“Hi everyone!” I say in high energy.

I walk over to my desk and see Iida holding the coffee.

“oh I didn’t know you drank coffee Iida-san”

“Oh yea this,” he blanked out for a moment, “yea I drink coffee all the time.” He then opened the top of the drink and chugged it right in front of me. Everyone else that knew what was supposed to happen, looked in shock and face palmed that he didn’t go for it.

“Delicious cold caffeine, my favorite!” he said after chugging the drink.

“oh cool, I learn more and more about you everyday” I say smiling, not knowing what’s going on.

“Hey you have the-” Tokoyami said turning around when I sat down.

“You know I do” I say taking out a bag of sunflower seeds, “here you go.”

“I didn’t know you and Tokoyami were like that” said Mina like she was trying to cause something.

“Ha no, I had some sunflower seeds a few days back and didn’t know he was in the tree I was sitting under and he saw the seeds and sent dark shadow to snatch a few. He really liked them and I said I would give him a bag when midterm week was over.”

“These seeds are American brand! And they come in interesting flavors” exclaimed Tokoyami, opening the bag and getting a handful.

Class started and it was chill with just some workbook problems. Iida wasn’t feeling the best, mostly because of that iced coffee. Class ends and Iida stays behind a bit to talk to me.

“Hey Palma-san! Are you going to go eat with your friends?”

“Yea probably”

“Can a join?”

“let me ask them real quick” I then go to the hallway and start singing All Star from Smash Mouth. I stopped to hear if Mimi or Jin sang back in response. Silence.

“they said no”

“How do you know they said no? Or if they even heard you?”

a portal suddenly appears.

“I heard you were talking shit about me and-” Mimi and Jin said in unison, heads poking out of the portal.

“We have a lil system in place, for yes or no’s, danger, escapes...you know the important stuff” I say as I climb in the portal.

We portal away and Iida is left standing there and thought about how the hell he’s going to confess if he blanked out just trying to set up for it. He goes to find Tokoyami since he’s the only other person in the class thats close with her.

“Tokoyami!? Are you out here?” Iida yells in the school patio.

“Yea Iida-kun? I’m in the tree with the hole” said Tokoyami perched in the tree with the bag of sunflower seeds Ita gave him in class.

“oh?! um hey question, since you’re so close with Palma-san, what do you know about her?”

“I’m not that close to her, she likes to pet dark shadow, she speaks spanish, she lives near me, ummmm she likes dark chocolate.”

“wait. You live near her?”

“yea, I saw her at the Sunday farmers market in the plaza a few weeks ago,” Tokoyami said with a mouthful of sunflower seeds “and as I was leaving, so was she and I saw her walk to some apartment complex half a block away from where I live.”

“Hmm... She didn’t see you that day?”

“Nope, she was alone and I don’t know how much she pays to live in that complex! It’s gated and heavily guarded that I was scared to be on the same side of the street!”

“that does seem a little odd” said Iida, now wanting to know more about her situation “thank you Tokoyami, sorry to disrupt your lunch hour.”

Iida walked away with more questions than answers. He remembers what Kirishima said about her and her friends being a spy group. He didn’t want to believe it was true but with her habits, systems with her friends, her avoidance of All Might and sudden appearance in the school system; it was strongly suggested that she could be running an inside job. It bothered Iida all day until after school, where he waited at her car.

“Oh Iida-san, you’re here!”

“yes um I wanted to ask you something”

“oh what is it?”

Frick, Iida thought, I don’t know if I should ask if she’s a spy or confess!

“I- I was going to ask if you wanted to study with me after school- on um FRIDAY!” Iida panicked to make up something.

“Oh sure, I have no plans after school friday.”

“Great! I was needing some help with English, Mic-sensei doesn’t make sense sometimes”

“cool, I believe that hehe, where at?” 

“would it be alright if we studied at your place?” Iida said hoping she wouldn’t pick up on an alternative motive.

“Sure, I haven’t had a guest over since I first moved here”

“Then I’d be honored to break that streak”

-Fast forward to Friday-

School lets out early due to preparations for the sports festival. Before meeting up with Iida; Ita, Mimi and Jin hatch a plan in case things get bad.

“ok review plan team!”

“Jin is going to portal himself and Mimi to inside my apartment before I go meet Glasses”

“I will send the dog emoji text to Ita to confirm that we are in the apartment and in position”

“Jin and I are going to be positioned in the extra room, ready for any signal to deploy action in civilian clothes that we sent with Ita yesterday along with food ration for the hours of confinement” 

“I will give the signal when we enter and when he leaves”

“and if everything fails and/or we get caught?”

“Jin and I will do the fake-out make-out and do a pretend fight”

“ok everything is planned out” I say as I put on my pink sunnies “time to deploy operation KEEP ITA’s STUDY SESSION SAFE, code name KISSS”

They portal out as I head to my car, unknowingly aware that Kirishima was listening to us the whole time.

“I KNEW THEY WERE UP TO SOMETHING!” Kirishima thinks out loud “I have to warn Iida that he’s in danger.”

He texts Iida

[Hey, what are you up to?]

[I am meeting with Palma-san to study]

[About that, you’re in danger.]

[What are you talking about? How is it dangerous to go study at somebody’s house?]

[I just heard her and her friends hatch a plan that involves you]

[What did you hear?]

[They said that they’re going to hide out in the apartment and wait for the signal to ambush you. They have backup plans and everything!]

[I’m not backing out on her, we are already on the way to her place]

[BE CAREFUL, text me when you leave. If you don’t I’ll assume the worst and contact the authorities]

[I’ll do that much, thank you for your concern Kirishima]

[👍]

“Who’s texting you so much?” I said as we pull into the apartment parking area.

“Oh it’s Kirishima”

“oh? That boy thinks he has everything figured out about me” I say as I turn off the car. I then I get a text, its Jin

[🐶🐕����]

“who’s texting you?” Iida said suspiciously.

“its Jin, he sends me the dog emoji to let me know he got home”

“oh what good friends you and those two are!”

We walk up to my apartment, Iida sees all the guards and lower rank heroes patrolling the perimeter. It rises his suspicions but he really hopes that it’s not true. I open the door and he’s hit with the smell of lavender, lilies and sage.

“I adore that scent, are those fresh flowers?”

“oh glad you noticed, they are” I say as I flip on the light “I buy my flowers from this farmers market down the street.”

“Oh? Well you have good taste, your place looks very bright and clean.”

“Thank you, may I offer you something to drink? Water? Coffee? Pressed Juice? TEA?” I said trying to tie in the signal with conversation.

“Pressed Juice please! What kind do you have?”

“This weeks blend is watermelon, cucumber and lemon.”

I give him the juice and I pray to God that nothing goes wrong. I have the strongest urge to just take off my bra because I’m home, I have to change to check on Mimi and Jin. Lucky for me, you can’t see my bedroom door or if I have an extra room so I can easy go to my room and check on them.

“Here’s your juice, feel free to get some snacks from the counter and get comfy, I’m going to change out of my uniform real quick.” 

“Oh ok I’ll just take out the materials”

I dash to my room and get nakey and slip on clean shorts and spiderman t-shirt my mom sent me recently. I teleport in the extra room to check on Jin and Mimi, they’re ok and are ready for anything. I teleport back to my room and walk out to the living room to see Iida looking at the picture of Mr. Muffins on my counter.

“Ok I’m back, what did you need re-explained again?” I say to get things started.

“Oh yea I needed help with adverbs-” he said while turning to me and caught a glance at my shirt, “I didn’t know you were a fan of Spiderman?”

“huh, oh! I’m not, its just a shirt that my mom sent me”

“So how is his hero work? Does he travel to other parts of the United States?”

I forget that pro hero culture is a real thing outside of the US.

“uh Spider Man isn’t a real hero, he’s just a comic book character” I say breaking the news as nicely as I could, “but Batman is a real thing!”

“He’s not real? Then why glorify him like he is?!”

“You could say the same about certain anime characters” I say trying not to say the forbidden word.

We get to studying and I get help with some of the hero course lessons that I slacked in. I keep worrying about Mimi and Jin but it seems like nothing is wrong, yet. 

“So I heard from Tokoyami that you speak Spanish? Is it true?”

“He told you? well duh of course I do”

“It’s just so impressive! You know english and Japanese plus Spanish?! I can barely understand english language rules” he said passionately “You truly are a rarity to behold.”

I blush really hard “oh uh thank you but really, it’s my culture that makes me this way”

He sees that I don’t want to talk about myself, he puts his hand on my hand. His heart starts racing and ,even though you can’t hear it, so does mine. Quickly somebody say something before I do something stupid like kiss him or ramble!

“I really want to know more about you so I can be your friend” he said squeezing my hand slightly “I want to be somebody you can depend on outside your program.”

I calm down a bit, phew he just wants to be my friend. I know I wasn’t ready to be in a relationship but I also absorb any and all physical affection. Iida was internally screaming because he didn’t mean to say friend, he meant to say hero. As in being her man and hero to protect her always. It was too late to fix what they said now. So Iida stayed a bit longer then headed out. I gave the flickering lights signal to say that he left and they can come out.

“Oof Ita can’t believe all this just to get friend zoned”

“press F to pay respect”

“F” we all say in unison.

Meanwhile, Iida is walking home, lamenting that he messed up his intentions. He then remembers to contact Kirishima,

[I just left her place]

[And what happened?]

[nothing, we were just studying]

[They probably were trying to get information before they attack]

[I don’t know what the truth is, but it’s inconclusive]

[You’re just saying that because you like her]

Iida stops responding, he was half right. There’s nothing they can do but just sit and wait for something to happen. One thing is still bothering them about Ita, Why is she here, alone?

-End Chapter 3-

<Previous - Next>

[donnarider]

!!DISCONTINUED!!  Klance - soulmate au (part 4)

Author’s notes:

update 12th July 2019: This story is unfortunately discontinued. There will not be a next part. I’m really sorry.

Read part 1

Read part 2

Read part 3

“Bold” texts are from Keith, “italic” texts are from Lance

„Wow, that’s… rough?“

„Yes it is! I mean… I meant what I said. I just thought he would...”

“Say that he wants to be more than friends?”

“Yeah…” Lance put his head on the table they were studying at. The library was quiet and Lance had a hard time keeping his voice down while telling Hunk about his horrible not-date date.

“So how did the rest of the da…what happened after that?”

“Well, I was dying on the inside and pretended everything was fine on the outside. So, the usual.”

“Lance!”

Lance sighed and leaned back on his chair. The library’s ceiling suddenly seemed very fascinating to him. “We talked about stuff like favourite movies and such. I asked him about his bike. I had to leave for my seminar and he said he’d text me.”

“Well that doesn’t sound too bad,” Hunk decided and squeezed Lance’s shoulder supportively. “Maybe he just needs some time?”

“And what do I do if he doesn’t? I thought I’d be fine with being just friends but-,” he waved his hands around in a helpless motion. “I was basically doomed when he told me to be nice to my coffee in Spanish. I can’t just NOT crush on him now, you know. And that sucks… big time.”

Hunk smiled sympathetically at him and continued to flip through the book in front of him. “Just take it slow. Take a break for a few days and then invite him to do something and see what it feels like then. He’ll either change his mind or you could just bring me and Pidge along to make the friends thing easier. Maybe that’ll help?”

“Hmm. Yeah, maybe.”

Hunk closed his book and got up. “You up for visiting Pidge and Matt? I don’t think we’re gonna get anything done here right now. Also I think Matt finally got that video game you wanted to play so badly.”

“Nooo, Hunk. You wanted to study. I didn’t mean to distract you, I’m just gonna-“

“It’s fine, Lance. I can’t concentrate anyways. And you helped me so much with my last essay, I think I can go a day without studying.”

Lance smiled at him and got to his feet as well. “Okay. But I swear I’ll be back to normal tomorrow and then we’re gonna take a look at the stuff from Iverson’s physics lecture.” Hunk groaned loudly and made Lance laugh with his desperate expression. “I know, I know. But we both have to get better at that stuff.” He stood behind Hunk and made a gesture over his shoulder like he wanted to show Hunk a beautiful landscape.

“NASA, dude. NASA.”

“Ugh, you’re right. But Matt and Pidge now. My brain needs a break.”

Lance swung his backpack over his shoulder. “Maybe I get one of Pidge’s hugs. I love Pidge’s hugs.”

Hunk beside him nodded. “Everyone does, man. They’re the best.”

Wednesday

 (3:15am): WTF DUDE? ???

(3:17am): I KNOW SORRY! Its our stupid neighbors having a party��

(3:18am): AT T HIS HOU R???

(3:18am): pls kill them for me

(3:20am): I would but prison isnt as appealing to me as you might think

(3:21am): So ur bad boy attitude knows boundaries? ;)

(3:22am): Dont mock me Im too tired for this

(3:24am): Yeh I can feel that

(3:24am): u really dont deal well without ur beauty sleep

(3:25am): Sorry :( And no, I really dont

 (3:31am): KEEEEEEITHH do smth!!!!

(3:32am): I have a test tomorrow !!

(3:34am): OM G IT STOPPED

(3:35am): Keith?

(3:35am): did u kill them?

(3:36am): maybe

(3:36am): KE ITH!

(3:37am): I slipped an anonymous note under their door that I would kill their cat if they didnt turn off the music immediately…

(3:38am): O M G thats cruel

(3:38am): u dont threaten peoples pets

(3:38am): NOT COOL!

(3:39am): chill, I was joking. It said Id call the cops on them

(3:40am): Oh okay good hope ur not just saying that

(3:40am): Also thankk

(3:41am): no problem. Good night, Lance

(3:43am): Lance?

 (7:36am): SORRY FELL ASLEEP!

(7:37am): Have fun at work today :)

Friday

(4:12pm): why

(4:25pm): what? u dont like it? ;)

(4:28pm): no

(4:29pm): oh come on! The queen is my best study motivation!

(4:30pm): please just stop

(4:32pm): KEITH! YOU INSULT BEYONCÉ YOU INSULT ME

(4:33pm): Can’t you study to something normal

(4:35pm): Normal normal or you normal?

(4:36pm): I dont care. Just no more beyoncé please. It’s been hours

(4:39pm): Lance?

 (4:42pm): really?

(4:42pm): Evanescence? That’s mature…

(4:43pm): WAKE ME UP INSIDE

(4:43pm): WAKE ME UP INSIIIDE

(4:45pm): I hate you

(4:46pm): No u dont :)

(4:47pm): STOP THIS MADNESS!

(4:48pm): Hunk says if you come to a college thing with us tomorrow, he’ll stop me for you

(4:50pm): What kind of thing?

(4:51pm): dunno, Hunk wont say, but its really good apparently

(4:53pm): OKAY DEAL NOW PLEASE STOP

(4:54pm): Party-pooper

(4:56pm): Tell Hunk I love him

Keith got off his bike, took off his helmet and unzipped his leather jacket. He headed towards the university building with mixed feelings about what awaited him. He had fought with himself about coming today but eventually the curious side of him had won. Keith wanted to see what Hunk had planned for them and also even if it scared him to admit it…he missed Lance.

Logically he knew that it did not make any sense. They hardly knew each other. But emotionally he just… missed him. He sighed and blinked against the bright sunlight. He lifted his hand to shield his eyes against it and bumped into someone.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to-“

“Don’t sweat it. All good here.” A friendly voice interrupted him. The tall boy in front of him looked him over and tilted his head to the side. „Hey, are you Keith by any chance?”

Keith nodded. “The one and only.”

“Oh, great! I’m Hunk.“ Keith took the big hand he was offered and returned the welcoming smile. When Hunk gestured for them to move out of the sun and stand in the tall building’s shadow Keith followed him thankfully.

“Nice to meet you. Thanks for saving me yesterday by the way.”

“Oh, no problem. Lance can get like that sometimes when he’s stressed. He didn’t mean anything by it. You know… finals and all. He’s a bit on edge around this time of the year.”

“No, I get it. NASA is a big thing, who wouldn’t freak out, right?”

Hunk gave a nervous laugh. “Yah, I guess. So umm, Lance had to pick up our friend Pidge, they should be here-“

“Exactly now.” Lance’s voice interrupted them. He stopped next to Hunk and let Pidge whom he had been carrying just now slip off his back.

“Hey, Keith. This is Pidge. They use they pronouns. I guess you already know Hunk by now.” Lance smiled at him and clapped Hunk on the back.

Keith nodded and raised his hand in greeting at Pidge. Immediately he regretted the awkward gesture and lowered his hand quickly.

“What’s up butter cup.” Pidge replied with a grin completely ignoring Keith’s weird behavior, who in return just raised an eyebrow at their choice of words.

“Lance, why did you carry Pidge here? Did you take ‘pick them up’ literally again?” Hunk asked with his hands on his hips.

“They paid me two dollars.”

Pidge shrugged. “I didn’t want to walk. It’s too early.”

“It’s almost noon, Pidge.” Hunk said while shaking his head but there was a visible smile on his lips.

“Exactly. Way too early.”

“I feel you, Pidge.” Keith threw in. “I had three coffees before I got here.”

Pidge yawned and stretched their arms over their head. “Good thinking. I only had one and I feel dead inside.”

“So, Hunk. What is this thing? Why are we here?” Lance asked and absently patted Pidge’s head while they leaned against him, eyes closed and repeatedly yawning.

“We are here, because today…” Hunk made a dramatic pause, “They are having a lecture about space for family and friends of students and-“

“AHHH STAR CEILING?” Lance interrupted Hunk excited while bouncing up and down, Hunk just smiled and nodded.

“Yep, Star ceiling.”

“What exactly is star ceiling?” Keith asked confused. Judging from Lance’s reaction this had to be the best thing in the entire universe.

“It’s only the best thing ever, dude,” Lance started to explain while taking Keith’s arm and pulling him in the direction of a big building.

“They only do this once or twice a year when they have family day for the freshmen and around finals for the really stressed out students so they don’t go all homicidal and stuff.” They entered the lecture hall and Lance directed them to a row in the back. “It’s basically just a short lecture about space and planets and what we do here at college but at the end they turn off the lights and project stars on the ceiling and walls. Dude…it’s the most beautiful thing ever. It will change you!” He gestured for Keith to sit down in one of the empty seats and sat next to him.

Hunk took the seat on Keith’s other side and Pidge sat next to Lance. It seemed like they were just in time because a man holding a mic entered the small stage. From the corner of his eyes Keith saw Pidge leaning over to Lance and whispering something into his ear. A moment later Lance bent forward so that Hunk and Keith could both hear him.

“Sorry guys, we’re gonna get Pidge more coffee. They are literally about to murder someone. We’ll be back in a minute.” With that they both left the room and Keith was alone with Hunk, which he didn’t mind that much. They had only exchanged a few sentences but Keith already liked the guy.

The man on the stage started talking about the importance of astronomy and explained the different subjects they were teaching. Unfortunately he had a really boring and monotone voice and Keith immediately zoned out. Thank God Hunk was there to keep him entertained.

“I know this stuff isn’t really interesting, especially not when he’s talking,” Hunk pointed in the direction of the stage. “But it’s really worth it. Lance didn’t exaggerate…well maybe a little… but it actually is crazy beautiful.”

“So you three all study astronomy?” Keith asked. This was his opportunity to learn a bit more about Lance and his friends without this nervous feeling he got around his soulmate. Hunk somehow managed to create an atmosphere around him that immediately made Keith feel comfortable.

“Yeah. It was actually Lance who got me into this stuff when we were younger. We met Pidge here on our first day. They are this crazy genius and got into college early. They are only sixteen but way ahead of most of the students here. Turned out they and their brother Matt live in the same building as me and Lance so we hung with them a couple of times and now we’re all basically besties for life.”

“Space nerds unite,” Keith said with a smile.

“Haha, yeah. Basically.”

“So… do you and Pidge wanna get into NASA too or is that only Lance?” Keith checked the stage for a second but the guy was still talking about boring stuff and Keith noticed that a few other people in the audience had started quiet conversations.

“Well Pidge is as good as in, let’s be real. Me… well. Of course NASA is the dream for almost everyone at this university and I would be thrilled… but I’m not as set as Lance if that makes sense. I feel like I could work anywhere as long as I’m close to my friends.” Hunk shrugged and knitted his brows in deep thought before he cleared his throat.

“Lance is working really hard for it though. You have no idea how many scholarships he had to apply for before he finally got a foot in. Didn’t stop him though.” He smiled and Keith could feel how proud he was of his friend. “You know, the first year was rough. He failed an important test two times and was sure they were gonna kick his ass but he studied harder than all of us and now he’s always in the top 5.”

“Wow. That’s really impressive,” Keith heard himself say and immediately wanted to slap himself. Way to sound like a high school fangirl, Kogane. Can we please think before we speak, brain?!

“Yeah it is.” Hunk sighed, unfazed by Keith’s inner distress. “It’s also really hard to watch sometimes though…”

Keith raised an eyebrow at him.

“Not the part where he’s top of the class, no. I mean how he gets there. You can’t imagine how many all-nighters the boy pulls during finals and he always pushes himself to get better. I mean it’s great that he’s improving but sometimes I wish he would allow himself a break.” He stiffened and gave a quick laugh. “I’m talking too much again, aren’t I. Sorry, this must be a weird first impression.”

Keith didn’t say anything for a while and chewed on his lower lip. “Is it really that bad? I mean… I haven’t noticed anything and finals are just around the corner right?” He thought back to the few times he’d seen Lance. He had always looked cheery and well… relaxed.

Hunk seemed to be pondering over his answer for a while. That’s when they heard the door behind them open slowly and Lance and Pidge slipped back into the room, Pidge holding a coffee cup in each hand. Hunk leaned over a bit and whispered just before the other two sat down. “Look at his eyes, he thinks we don’t notice…”

Keith had no idea what he meant by that and was staring at a spot on the floor absently when Lance waved his hand in front of his face to get him out of his trance. “Keith, buddy, my man. They’re about to start, don’t pass out on me now!”

Keith blushed a little and sat up straighter. “Yeah, sorry. Not passing out. Now, let’s see your space magic thing. Hope it’s as good as you made it sound.”

The boy next to him grinned from ear to ear. “Better.”

The crowd around them applauded loudly. Apparently the speech part was over and somebody dimmed the lights, making everyone go silent. It was now completely dark in the hall. Keith could feel his palms getting sweaty. Why was this taking so long? He swallowed hard.

He whispered, almost inaudible “Lance?” but in this exact moment they turned on the projectors and surprised ahhhhs and ohhhs could be heard through the entire room.

Keith threw his head back so quickly he almost hit it on his seat’s backrest.

Lance’s words hadn’t prepared him for what he was seeing now at all. It was truly just… beautiful. Thousands of little stars were dancing on the ceiling and the floor and just everywhere. He knew he was sitting in a boring lecture hall and he felt incredibly stupid for even thinking so but for a moment he really felt like he was in space. His heartbeat sped up and his eyes wander around the entire room so quickly he was almost getting sick.

Keith was trying to take it all in before it stopped. The stars danced around his fingertips as he raised his hand in front of his face and watched. He wasn’t even questioning how the whole thing worked it was just too… too everything. In a good way.

“Sooo, did I promise too much?” Lance suddenly whispered next to his ear.

Keith just shook his head and then turned it to smile at him. “No, you didn’t. This is great! Thanks for inviting me to this.” Lance smiled at him and then quickly turned his head to the ceiling again. Neither of them mentioned that it had actually been Hunk who invited Keith.

Keith was still staring at Lance’s face from the corner of his eyes, watching the stars being projected onto his skin and their reflections in his eyes. He looked so beautiful like this, it made Keith’s head spin. He wanted to say something, to tell Lance how pretty he was but he bit his tongue instead. Just friends he reminded himself.

That’s when he remembered Hunk’s words from earlier and looked at Lance’s eyes more closely. What was he supposed to see? The long eyelashes? The small freckles underneath them? The well blended but thick layer of… concealer? Something clicked in his brain. Hunk had mentioned that Lance wasn’t sleeping enough and pushing too hard. Of course he and many others were unable to tell if they didn’t know what to look for. Lance had covered up his dark circles almost perfectly. Almost… Keith turned his gaze to the ceiling again and frowned. Why was he pretending to be fine? It was normal to be tired around finals wasn’t it? Why was he trying to hide it?

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’m afraid we have to end this now since our time is up,” a voice sounded from the front of the room. “Thank you all for coming and enjoy the rest of your day on campus.” They turned off the projectors and disappointment could be heard all around. Some classical song started to play and people started to shift but the lights were still out. Keith dug his nails into his palm and tried to breathe evenly. It’s fine, he tried to tell himself. They’re gonna turn them back on every second. Only they didn’t.

“Ladies and gentlemen, it appears we’re having some trouble back here. We’re sure everything will be fixed soon,” the voice echoed again. “Always a bit hard to find the light switch in the dark.” The voice said and gave a fake laugh. Some parents laughed as well. Keith didn’t. He gulped and pressed deeper into his seat.

He could feel Lance stir in the dark next to him and a hand touching his shoulder. “Keith? Are you okay?” Before Keith could even think of something to respond with the lights were finally turned back on. Keith let out a very deep breath he hadn’t noticed he was holding until now. He quickly unclenched his hands and turned his head to give Lance a small smile.

“All good, yes. I’m a bit sad it was over so quickly though.”

Lance looked at him questioningly for a second longer before he returned the smile. “Right? I wish they would do this more often!”

The group got up and headed out before the mass of people in the hall could block the aisles. The bright sunlight blinded Keith for a moment when they walked outside and he held up his helmet to shield his eyes. Someone walked into him from behind and he quickly turned around to apologize for stopping in the doorway but it was Lance he was looking at. An elderly woman complained about them being in her way and they stepped aside and walked a few feet to get away from the mass.

“Sorry for bumping into you,” Lance started, “It’s just,” he pointed at the helmet in Keith’s hand. “I didn’t notice before because I was so excited about the star thing but… did you bring your bike?” Hunk listened to their conversation and laughed looking at Lance now. Keith didn’t exactly understand what he thought was so funny and turned to Pidge for help but they were just quietly smiling at the whole scene.

“Ummm, yes? It’s how I got here. I don’t have a car, soo…” Keith shrugged a little lost.

“Awesome! I mean great. I mean...,” Lance scratched his head. “Can I see it?”

“Uhh, sure. I parked right over there.” Keith pointed over his shoulder. Lance didn’t even wait for the others. He was already on his way to the parking lot, almost running. When the others caught up with him he was inspecting Keith’s bike and admiring the details of the machine by almost touching it with his nose.

Hunk and Pidge seemed kind of impressed too and Hunk slapped Keith’s shoulder. “Sweet ride, Keith!” He joined Lance in walking around the bike to get a better look. “Lance mentioned you work at a workshop. Did you build this yourself?”

Keith nodded and then realised that Hunk wasn’t looking at him so he couldn’t see. “Yah, I did. It was the first project I did without Shiro’s help. Took me a while to find all the parts. I could get a better bike if I wanted but I’m kind of sentimental I guess.”

Lance nodded. “No I get it. It’s a bit like it’s your child, right? I mean… you made her.”

Keith smiled. “Yeah. I guess.”

Pidge gave a fake cough to get everyone’s attention and pointed at the bike. “If you’re finished drooling over that can we go get some food please?”

“That?” Keith repeated in a fake hurt tone.

“They’re secretly loving this more than Lance and me. You should see the stuff they build. We should visit you at your shop and just leave Pidge there for a few hours. They’d have the time of their life.” Hunk chuckled at the expression on Pidge’s face after his revelation.

 “Speaking of food though,” Lance looked at Keith and tilted his head, “We thought about grabbing a bite at Planet Altea. You in?”

Keith considered for a moment. He could spend some more time with them and get to know them better. He probably should. Shiro would tell him to… but he also really wanted to go home. The light incident had seriously freaked him out even if he didn’t want to show it. He’d rather calm down at home, alone, where he could stop pretending and no one would see what a mess he really was after such a small thing.

“Sorry, I need to leave. Shiro wants to visit an old friend of his and he’s dragging me along.” Lie. Shiro never dragged him anywhere Keith didn’t want to go. Apart of from that Shiro wasn’t even home right now.

Lance chewed his lower lip. “Ohh. Okay. We’ll text then?” The disappointed look on his face made Keith feel bad instantly.

“Yes definitely. It was really great. Thank you all for taking me.” Let me leave let me go.

Pidge and Hunk said goodbye and they watched Keith take off quickly. Lance waved one last time before he was out of sight, but Keith didn’t turn around to see it.

 Usually driving calmed him down but he felt himself get more anxious with every mile. He was glad he could finally take off the helmet when he arrived at his and Shiro’s place because he could breathe more freely instantly. He put the bike in the garage, unlocked the front door and took the elevator up to their floor. After hastily unlocking the front door and locking it after himself again, he immediately kicked off his boots and headed for his bedroom.  

He’d learned a few breathing techniques during his never ending counseling sessions and was really glad about that right now. After some minutes of leaning against his door he got his breathing under control. His thoughts however where still spinning, so he put his favourite playlist on shuffle and flopped down on his bed.

After a couple of songs Keith took out his phone to ask Shiro when he would be home and noticed he had gotten a few messages.

 (2:17pm): Hey, u ok?

(2:18pm): Getting kind of an anxious vibe over here?!

(2:20): Also thats an awful lot of emo music for someone who insists hes not emo ;)

 Shit. Sometimes he forgot the soulmate connection was a thing.

 (2:33pm): Sorry! Yes I’m good

There was an immediate response.

(2:33pm): U sure? Doesnt feel like it

(2:35pm): Idk

(2:36pm): Maybe not

(2:36pm): do you wanna talk? I can call u

Keith’s whole body tensed. Was he ready for that? Should he lie, maybe say he was tired and wanted to nap or something? Should he tell the truth? He frowned.

(2:37pm): I’m not… good at phone calls

(2:37pm): Np u can just listen and I’ll do the talkin

(2:39pm): that’d be ok?

Keith swallowed. Shiro probably wouldn’t be home for a while and he really needed to talk to someone. The question was if Lance was safe to talk to? Would it overstep the friendship line? Why could things never be easy…

 (2:42pm): yes, ok

 [Incoming call: Lance McClain]

More author’s notes:

This fic on AO3

Yeah after 500 years I finally updated. I could explain at length why it took my so long but it comes down to this: I was stressed, I was depressed, I’m sorry but now it’s finally here! Hooray!

As always a big THANK YOU to @alteanmoonchild for being my beta and for reading every new draft and honestly telling me when what I wrote isn’t good so I can improve and grow. I love us working together on this <3

Thank you to all of you for reading! If you have any questions or feedback send me an ask or dm me <3

Me an my friends finally cosplayed Voltron so if you wanna see me as Shiro and my awesome friends as Keith, Lance and Coran head over to my instagram.

Do you know what keeps me motivated when I so often doubt my writing and don’t know how to continue? Getting feedback! So please reblog, like, comment or even draw fanart. Whenever I read an “I love this” comment it makes me incredible happy! Also one of my goals is to someday have someone draw fanart for something wrote soo... if you wanna do that I’ll love you. Also please tag me if you do.

If you want me to tag you in the next part when I post it, just send me an ask saying so and I’ll add you to the taglist.

taglist: @alyy--caticus @princealektheorange @an-important-nobody @teddyorionpotter @spookyscaryshitstorm @ladythugs @positevelybakerstreet @meganmoo02 @atomicengineerdetective @jishwadun-is-jishwafun @anemoee

[garethito]

You know... I've been meaning to ask you about this for a while, and yesterday's tag thing that you did with those Bale gifs only like... fueled? My curiosity? Lol, if that makes sense. Could you like... relive? The Champions League final from this year for us? Like, your perspective on it? Or maybe even the actual whole day of the final? Sorry, God, I know this is weird, but I just love how you tell stories from your life! I have seen you do it with some other anons once!

First of all, THANK YOU SO MUCH for this like, you guys always send me such interesting questions and Im so??? and OMG no this is not weird stop this is such a wonderful question to ask!! And omg you liked how I told the stories to those anons that is so sweet thank you so muchhhhh ❤️❤️💝❤️💘💘💞💞💘

But also this is making me really emotional I dont think I will be able to write this without tearing up but here we go!!! I was at school today and we had a special day so we didnt make any classes, so I had time to formulate an answer to this, and to complete it at home 💞

Quick WARNING?? Yes I am perfectly aware of how crazy and overdramatic this whole story sounds, but the thing is that this is how I truly feel about this day in my life. So yeah lol. Football is basically my life!

I would like to start this by saying that the day of the 26th of May 2018 is the most important day of my entire life as a football fan. There is nothing that could even come close to this. Absolutely nothing. Never in my life have I cried like in that night. Never. Absolutely never. I have looked at my life as a person, at my hardest times, when I cried a lot, but not even that can even slightly compare to the amount of crying that I have done on that glorious day of May 7 months ago. When I say crying, though, I dont actually mean crying, no. I mean violently sobbing, screaming at the top of my lungs, shaking and feeling numb. But in the best way possible, the happiest tears that I ever shedded.

My actual perspective, like you said, though, starts from the 2nd of May, a day after our semi-final second leg against Bayern. From that day, until the 26th, my mind, my body, my soul only thought about the final. I could not even focus on the Clasico on the 6th, neither on the last La Liga match. I was so fucking nervous, words are not sufficient to describe….. At least once every 2-3 days I would go to the bathroom with severe stomach aches and sit there until I would try to calm myself down so that my grandmother wouldnt get worried. I thank God, the Universe, or whoever you think invented life for the fact that highschool had nothing special during that period, just a few tests, that I got the best grades on, because had there been something big, I would have surely failed. That was a nightmare. Just think about it. Horrible La Liga season, then those fucking shaky as fuck second leg matches against Juve AND Bayern. I was literally so pessimistic that I am scaring myself right now thinking about it. All these bad scenarios played through my head ”What if Zizou loses his job? What if this will be the start of our downfall? What if this is the last Champions League final we will play? What if, what if, what if….”. I always tried to tell my brain how stupid I was, that we are Real Madrid and that we will win, like we always do, that we are the best fucking team in the Universe and that nobody even comes close to being like us. But its like these voices in my head wouldnt stop, it was so scary.

Come 25th of May I was an actual lifeless corpse. No matter how much I tried to call my best friend, who was in Bulgaria at that time, and telling her that I cant take this anymore, and her telling me that its going to be okay like it always is, that she doesnt really know my team well but she knows we will win, no matter how much of that was happening, I couldnt fucking stop being nervous and constantly thinking about this match.

On the morning of the 26th I woke up with a severe headache at about 8:30-9 AM. The only things that I remember from that whole day are the constant empty feeling, the amount of times I listened to Hala Madrid Y Nada Mas and the amount of pictures, videos, promotional/support videos I saw and watched. I called my friend one last time and I told her that now I am optimistic, that we will win.

My whole emotional state was ruined, however, by Gareth not starting. I dont need to explain the whole February-May Gaz-Zizou situation because I think everyone knows it too well by now and what I fucking felt about it. I have never been so enraged in my entire life. After all he has done, still no place in the starting XI. Though, this is pretty much the only thing that has ever angered me about Zizou. I love that man too much, I dont think there will ever be a coach that will ever come close to him, a coach that I will ever love as much as I loved him, but this whole situation really, really angered me. As I said, not going to get into details, I think that is enough. Though, I tried to only focus on my hardly achieved positivity about the match. 

The match started and my emotional state reached its lowest point. I couldnt take it anymore, I felt impossibly sick from being so nervous, I got the most severe migraine ever, my eyes were literally about to pop out ugh again, remembering that gives me chills. Dani got injured, and I got angry again, because he didnt deserve it, the World Cup was literally about to start like God give this man a break!!!

Halftime at 0-0, my optimism grew, believe it or not. I felt like we will have more urgency in the second half and that we will win this.

The second half came, with me just desperately hoping for a goal. Because we were playing so well, we deserved a reward!! And it did come, with Benzemas goal, God I felt so relieved and happy. I have seen people saying that his goal was not good but? You literally take everything that is being offered to you in a Champions League final! He scored, he gave us a goal, we were 1-0 up, and I was literally screaming from joy, I was shaking so much and I was the proudest person alive. God, I love my team. Then, Liverpools equalizer came. I didnt think anything of it. I wouldnt get rid of my optimism. I was looking at my boys and I knew we would win.

And Oh My God, here we fucking go. 

Minute 61. Gareth comes on. I was so grateful that he at least got to play 30 minutes, I literally only wanted to see him. At that time, considering everything that was happening, I was already emotionally starting to prepare for his departure to another team. I was watching him in those moments, flashbacks through my mind of all the glorious times I got to see him, all of his goals, everything.

And then…

All of a sudden…

62:58

That moment. The moment in which my soul has definitely left my body. The most beautiful moment I have ever lived in watching football. The moment in which I was the proudest person alive. A moment I will never, ever, ever forget, for as long as I get to live. The moment I have literally seen history being made, right before my eyes. The moment in which I literally evaporated, left the Earth, idk how to explain this but I hope you understand me. My idol, that had suffered so much that season, scored a fucking bicycle kick in a FUCKING UCL FINAL. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. The happiest, most full of joy, best, most emotional moment. Ever. No exaggeration.

My perspective on this? Oh well, brace yourselves. If you think everything that I have written so far seems insane, get ready for this.

I was on my bed, watching the game, shaking. I saw the passes, beautiful passes, that ended up with Marcelo controling the ball (incredibly, as he always does, my Brazilian sunshine). I saw him swaying to the side, and then passing a high, aerial ball in the box. Gareth came up to meet it, with… a scissor kick. That he scored. I literally fucking exploded like there is no other word. I jumped off my fucking bed and I ran literally across the house and came back, making the most inhuman noises ever I swear. I came back to my bedroom and I collapsed on the floor and I literally started fucking bawling my eyes out, and even that seems like an understatement. Screaming at the top of my lungs, bawling my eyes out, literally all of it happening on the floor. My grandmother literally came in and she thought something happened to me, but then I just pointed to the screen and she understood lmao. And from that point onward I cannot say anything anymore, because I dont remember anything else but me on the floor, literally. After like 15 minutes I hardly even managed to get back on the bed, and guess what?

82:41

AGAIN. 

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I

N

???? I dont know what to say anymore. Like he literally toyed with everyone that night, he didnt care about anything. Again, with a pass from Marcelo, he literally goes from FAR FAR FAR away and he shoots and… scores?? How much do you think my poor fragile self can handle? Like, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU SAY TO THAT?? Except for bawling your eyes out even more, if thats even possible? Its been 7 months and I still dont have words for what happened that night, like 2 goals ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? LIKE DO YOU UNDERSTAND I WAS LITERALLY DEAD LIKE ??? I LOST EVERY SINGLE BIT OF MY SANITY THAT NIGHT. 2 goals, 2 goals in 20 minutes, he was about to get a fucking hattrick. A fucking HATTRICK IN HALF AN HOUR, but Karius unfortunately stopped that shot.

The match ended and… I dont remember anything other than barely seeing the screen, I literally had a blurred vision.

We fucking won it. We DID IT. THE DECIMOTERCERA WAS OURS.

In the moment in which Sergio lifted it I… I dont have words, did I go into another Universe, did I ascend, did my soul leave my body I dont even know but what I do know is that I spent the rest of the night, up until like 6AM, crying my heart out. And this is what I mean by ”I have never cried so much in my entire life”. Like I have never spent a whole night crying.

I went to bed at like 6:30, woke up at like.. 10?? I think you can imagine how I woke up, I literally felt like I was going to die but I spent the rest of the day catching up on everything that happened the entire night.

And then, of course, the celebrations, Cibeles, Bernabeu… of course your sensitive girl bawled her eyes out again lol!

Every day ever since it happened, I have always been thinking about this day. About all of it. No point in counting how many times I rewatched the goals lol! But I think you can imagine haha 💘

So yeah, this is pretty much it DSLKFDKJFKDFJKDFK. The story about my best ever day of watching football I made it unecessarily long (Im so sorry). I think the only conclusion that I can get from this is Hala Madrid Y Gareth Y Nada Mas lol! 💘💘

[jvj246018]

Next day

I pull my aching body from the comfort of my sheets and strat rummaging through my chest of draws settling in an oversized plane black t shirt and faded blue skinny jeans it was going to be a long day she knew it just by the feel of the morning after pulling on her flat riding boots on and grabbing a black jacket and her purple handbag/ back pack its one of those multi functional / compasidy bag that can hold literally everything perfect for my slaying gear and of cause my school supplies.

Grabbing my mobile placing it in my bag and quickly doing my make-up just light done to hide the bags under my eyes and the fact that I slept for literally 3 hours.

Then I head down to the kitchen where I hear Aunt Jenna toast I can make toast

Elena : it's all about the coffee aunt Jenna

Jeremy: is there coffee

Me : there's always coffee.

Oh aunt jenna have you forgotten about your meeting thing?

Jenna : that's at crap now...

Me : Go will be fine right guys

Jeremy huh .

Elena: of cause we will be.

Oh Nicki are you coming to school with me and Bonnie or making your own way?

Me : if it's cool with Bonnie I'd like a lift

Elena : I'll tell her it's both of us then.

Me : cool thanks .

In Bonnie's car.

Bonnie : so my Grams is telling me that I'm a psychic.

Me : maybe you are?

Bonnie : really not you too .Elena hey elena back in the car ..

Elena : oh god I did it again didn't I.

Me : its okay Elena we get it

Elena : you were saying that ?

Bonnie: that I'm physics now.

Elena : then product something somethings about me.

Bonnie : I see ..

Crack ..

Me : was that a bird ?

Elena : uhm.

Bonnie : yeah it was like a bird I'm so sorry guys.

Elena : it's okay we can't be freaked out by cars forever.

Bonnie: I predict that this year will be kick ass and all the sad and dark times are over and you two will be beyond happy.

Then we get back on the road and arrive at the school when Bonnie starts again.

Bonnie: total lack of male reliastate , oh wow look at the shower curtin..

That's where I choose to stop listening I don't like ragging on people's cloths it's not cool regardless of weather they appear to be wearing a shower curtin that's their perogative.

I'm pulled from my thoughts by Elenas whine he hates me.

Bonnie : that's not hate thats you dumped me and I'm to cool to show it but secretly I'm listening to air supply's latest hits .

Me : she's right he doesn't hate you.

Maybe you are psychic?

Bonnie : umhum.

Wait who's that ?

Elena : all I see is back.

Bonnie : that's a hot back, I'm scencing seattle he and he plays a guitar

Me : not gonna drop this are you.

Bonnie: nope I'm pretty much going to run it into the ground.

Care: oh my god Elena Nicki your here how are you, how are they are they good

Me : yes we're fine

Elena : much better.

Care : you poor things she says as she breezes past us into her other friends.

Elena : no comment.

The bell rings and we all go off to class I sit second left at the back because Tanner didn't want me helping Elena in class so here I sit the new guy is in front of me and there fore behind Elena. Tanner called on Elena and Bonnie and the new guy jumped to there rescue just as I was about to, I'm kinda glad because i was too tired to play the Knight in shining armor today, he even rubbed Tanners face in it. Harsh considering he was just trying to make them pay attention but it's was nice enough of him I think he's trying to let Elena know he's interested witch she already knows. But he might not know that so I'll give him some credit but you know I can't get this feeling that he's... there's something not right he feels old. He feels like Angle but different too he's the same and yet not. Deciding to shake that thought away since he's new and I'm supposed to be in class not in slayer mode not that I'm ever out of it but he's knew deciding I'll text Wilson see if he knows anything.

Its probably just my elevated paranoia but still.

I look down at my phone send a quick text and head to my next class without waiting for Elena since I'm in art next.

She has French on the opposite side of the school.

So I sit in my class drawing on to my canvas over the dry paint to draw a silhouette of the moon that I will paint later .

There's a few stems of trees too that will have leaves when I find my natural sponge.

I'm pulled from my thoughts by a text from Caroline.

Have you spoken to the new guy ?

I send her back a message No.

And continue as I ignore my phone after putting it on silent.

To continue the project scenary views the moon is the view from my window I have a picture to prove it.

My teacher loves that I work in the style of Bob Ross. So she's okay with me using it alot.

All in all I like this class it's a lesson where I don't have to hide just got to be me that's it.

The rest of the day went really quickly since I had double art and pe last. I found myself walking home to avoid the Stephen talk.

I also wanted to stop in to see Wilson see if he turned up anything.

Oh boy did he ever.

Inside Wilson's spacious but cluttered apartment he is sat at his desk I'm opposite him reading his ansesters diary on the Salvetor brothers. Getting frustrated I lean back into his blue arm chair using a ribbon as my book mark.

Wilson: Stephen is a ripper, a ripper that forces himself to eat animal blood to survive according to my ancestor he's actually a good guy when he's on the waggon.

But his brother Damon he's a peace of work. And determined to make Stephen suffer.

Me : grate. Anything else I should know ?

Wilson : not yet but if I find more I'll tell you.

Me : this is just grate Stephen is vampire that may aswell have a drug addiction and he brings his brother that takes glee in murder and all things that vampires reval in.

Wilson : you may have to kill them.

Me : yes only problem Stephen is Elenas new thing.

Ugh this will be hard.

Wilson : your going to need to cast a protection charm.

Me : grate how do I do that? I don't have a spell book the things I taught my self were just academy's that kept happening I learned to control them

Wilson : here, taking the offered book I check the index .

Chaper 5 page 156780. Right .

So herbs holy water vervain talismans will that work on them they are of a witch made line.

Wilson : humm yes just pay attention to the making talismans really understand what you want them to do.

Me : right okay what do I use ?

Wilson : stones crystals metal wood just about anything really.

Me : okay where's that book on stones and what there for?

As if he predicted it he handed it to me then he sat with me and we found the one that will make it so they have to be invited in every time they leave and come back.

With that in mind she started digging through the crystals making sure to have them represent an angle since they are strong representation of a protector.

Carful to choose the representation stone tigers eye for Jeremy, Lapis lazuli for Elena , strawberry quartz for Jenna and amethyst for me. I figure I'm lucky that he keeps these things he's abit of a pack rat.i smile as I think this.

Then I made one for the house to be kept by the front door and it had all 4 stones in it each one is made from stones and steel for durability.

Then Wilson drove me home and thanked me for all my help with the restoration of old books.

Jenna might know but Elena and Jer don't so secrets to be kept.

After hanging the houses talisman up then I had jenna her one I attached them to the keys jenna nodded understanding and then I give Elena and Jer theirs and they thank me Jer likes his and Elena dose too its nice.

I never hide the supernatural I just don't come right out and tell them either.

They would never believe me.

And Elena would want to help but that would probably get one or both of us killed. They know I believe in this stuff and they think I'm mad for it. One day they'll know I hope but for now I'll just be the crazy sister.

Pulled from my thoughts by a text from Carebear or Caroline depends who you ask.

You better be coming to the back to schools bash .

I text back

Yes I am I'm just debating on an outfit I'm thinking riding boots to below my knee thermal leggings black boots navy leggings black dress top.

And a leather jacked .

She beeps back no the swishy floral top I gave you for your last birthday.

Laughing at her since she's grate at this kind of thing I pull on the top she demanded I use, and then the rest of the outfit.

Pulling it back off placing it to one side I think I'll just wear it all day tomorrow that way no big change and frees me up but care would kill me so my burgundy long top in place of the floral top for school.

Same purple bag I take for everything always be prepared.

Then I did a cleansing to keep out the vampires that Elena might end up inviting in, but she they won't be able to get in and out as they please.

I love Care but her need to be popular is suffercating its why we don't have the whole BFF thing going we are but out of the lime light I'm the one she can just be herself with not even Bonnie can claim to have that.

We have sleep overs monthly and she catches up on everything and in-between Elena tells me her self absorbed versions care is definitely the more trust worthy for gossip but you need to take her exaggeration with a pinch of salt.

With that last thought Nicki found herself headed out to patrol. She just hoped that she wouldn't have to slay Stephen tonight that would be a major downer.

[ilkkijangege]

112

Hello hello!!

I think this is my most favourite Chad Chronicles yet.

We had a really good laugh today and possibly the longest conversation we've ever had.

(Oh he came in late today at 9 and I thought he was not gonna show up cos he usually comes in at 8.)

Firstly, I went over to MF's desk to talk to her and ask her where she went for sushi in the end with her bf. They went to Yo! Kitchen but their sushi selection weren't that great, so she would like to go for proper sushi again. Then she also would like to have Korean BBQ so I recommended Arisu or Drunken Fish, she said she's been to Drunken Fish before but her sister would always be the one to order. So she told me maybe I could come with her the next time and I told her to invite Chad. She said that is a great idea! She will also invite other people so that it is not awkward and suspicious.

Then MF came over a few hours later to talk to Chad. She asked him, 'Hey, do you like sushi? I'm thinking of going with a bunch of people in work.' Chad replies 'You can count me out, I am not the man for that.' In MF's head, she was all like 'NOOOO BIANCA IS GONNA BE MAD/SAD'. Then Chad said he just doesn't really like a lot of textures in his food. MF said, if that is the case then he wouldn't like sushi. She also goes 'Bianca really likes sushi so we were talking about it. How about Korean BBQ?' I couldn't really hear what his reply to this was because I was talking to our SME about a case that I had. But MF was explaining that it will be easier to split the bill if more people come etc.

Then, there is this night out tomorrow with a bunch of people for their birthdays. One guy from our team went around and asked if anyone was going. He asked Chad if he was going and Chad said he'll think about it (in a way that he is interested in going). He asked where it was and the guy said 'Wagamama I think.' But I corrected him and said, 'I think it's Wigwam.' To which he said 'Oh yeah that's the one!' Chad then asks me 'Is it nice there?', I replied 'Yeah, I liked it the last time I was there.' He asks if there was food there and I said yes. I wasn't sure if I was gonna go cos I didn't get a proper invite and I have work on Saturday but MF is dragging me and told me I can leave early to get the last bus home. Which is fair.

Later on, our TL announced that we are going to have a meeting with the managers. We had an idea what the meeting was gonna be about because we heard it from someone. So before we went to the meeting, Chad joked 'Bianca, are you ready for night shift? 11pm-7am? Remember that? You leave when it is dark and you come home and it is still dark.' I think I just laughed at him. (Note: he pronounces my name as "Bee-yong-ka", which is how I like it 😏🥰" (ALSO: REALISATION: I told him about the night shift only once HOW THE FUCK DOES HE REMEMBER THESE THINGS)

Then we made our way to the meeting room, I really wanted to sit beside him but he sat beside GG and another guy from our team was sitting in between us (he got to that seat before us). So I was a bit sad. But I did see his 보으너. HAHAHAH SORRY BASTOS. May nabasa kasi ako if a guy likes you, may ganun sila if you are around 😏 chos 😏

So when the meeting ended, I told them so does this mean I have to do nights because it's in my original contract? Then my team joked how I should just move into the office. Then Chad goes 'Yeah you can move into the booths. One booth will be your kitchen, the other one is your bathroom.' Then I said 'then the other one will be my walk in closet!' We really just had a great laugh together 😭

Then we got to our desk and someone told me that the breakfast they are providing is only for 3 months and I go to him 'do you know the breakfast is not even permanent? They're only giving it to us for 3 months?' He replied, 'Who told you that?' and I said, 'Thats what the other team were told in their session.' Then we both said at the same time 'how much is a croissant like?' Then i said 'They're not even that expensive in Lidl!' 'they're like 50c?' Then I go to him but i am so confused how this new shift is gonna work, then he explained it again to me and I kinda understood it now. But it is an optional thing so if we decide to do it, we will have to tell our manager and they will give us a new contract. He does not want to do it at all and neither do I so byeeee 😂

Then GG showed us this infographic on the office doors about coronavirus and how you should avoid physical contact. Then he goes to me l'we should do the elbow touch' then *does the gesture* BUT STUPID ME SHOULD HAVE TOUCHED ELBOWS WITH HIM UGH BIANCA. Then i told him we shouldnt fist bump with QA now. then he said 'we can just do an air fist bump' then I go 'imaginary fist bump' and we were just laughing together, like a very comfortable conversation.

Then MF came over again when she was heading home and then Chad basically repeated that I will move into the office and explained all the different booths again. Like seriously 😩 I also find it kilig when he keeps on looking at me intently when I am speaking 😩 WHAT IS GOING THROUGH YOUR MIND? 😩

Overall, I was really happy today. I hope this continues because I really wanna get to know him sooo bad. 😩 I hope it won't be like before where we started getting kinda comfortable, like saying hello to each other, eye contact etc, then it all suddenly vanished. Aish Chad why are you so hard to read 😩 If he is going to the night out tomorrow, I plan on buying him a drink. Wish me luck.

[mochabeesnuts]

For the ting (go skkrrrrrat) thing. All of them

*yells* Da ting go skkkkrrrraaa, papakakaka Skivipipopop and a poopooturrrboom Skrra, tutukukututoom, poompoom

1. selfie

HNNNG OK UH. UGH. HRM. FINE. A;JKFG

hnnng asdfj;klad aNYWAYS

2. what would you name your future kids?

im not sure honestly, i feel like its one of those things where i have to meet them first. and honestly i dont think about it too much because i plan on adopting so chances are they’ll be old enough to already have a name. idk, im not picky about age. i feel like its going to be one of those things were i’ll just. know which kid needs me and that will be that.

3. do you miss anyone?

mm i miss my dogs at home. but i get to visit soon so!

4. what are you looking forward to?

im looking forward to january and seeing my friend. im also looking forward to next semester and getting a fresh start. also the possibility of getting a cat soon

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

heheh yeah there is

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?

y.u.p. jesus fuck

7. what was your life like last year?

um. it was hard. and painful. but it was a learning experience and i think im stronger for it

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?

yes

9. who did you last see in person?

uhh i saw my roomie like a half hour ago when i was walking home

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?

i used to be a fucking master at it. cant tell if i miss that skill or not

11. are you listening to music right now?

yup! trying to find some new songs to listen to regularly

12. what is something you want right now?

i dont know actually

13. how do you feel right now?

i feel... mm i feel kinda peaceful. i feel like a lot of weight has been taken off of my shoulders but i still have so much on my plate. but i have a clearer mind to work on those things now so it’s a start

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?

umm i got a hug from my dad on friday. if dad doesnt count then um.. hm... *squints* a long time

15. personality description

passionate. when i feel something i feel it strongly. whether its good or bad its fucking there and i almost always act on it. i dont hesitate but i try to be as considerate as possible. i try to be a people pleaser. and im also very determined. heheh, look at that i managed not to make that negative, kinda happy with that tbh.

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn't?

yes, just once i think. i told someone it was ok that they were leaving me and that it was ok they were breaking my heart instead of telling them how i actually felt. i wanted to say it, but i knew that making them feel worse for it wouldnt do either of us any good. so i kept my feelings to myself.

17. opinion on insecurities.

we all have them. a lot of them. and they overwhelm even the best of us at times. whether we choose to or not we wear them on our sleeves and theyre one of the hardest things to fight against because our greatest and strongest enemy is ourselves. being your own greatest friend is fucking hard, and insecurities play a large role in that.

18. do you miss how thing were a year ago?

no. i dont. i was sad and lonely. i didnt feel like i belonged anywhere. but thats not true anymore, and id never want to go back to that.

19. have you ever been to New York?

nope!

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?

i have a few songs that i love a lot rn but mmm i can put down the one that i relate to a lot today? Machine by misterwives is a big mood for me rn and its nice the other hella big mood and this one has been putting the biggest smile on my face is salt by bad suns

21. age and birthday?

18 about to turn 19! my bday is november 30th :D

22. description of crush.

theyre human. they work hard and theyre passionate about what they love. a complete and utter dork that gets excited and can go on an on about what they find interesting and i can honestly listen to it all day. theyre sweet and silly and creative and smart as hell. theyve been there for me through so fucking much and we’ve both hit our low points and shown darker sides of ourselves but despite that we’re both still here yknow? and that, idk that means something to me. because anyone can stick around through the bright and beautiful stuff, the easy parts. but it takes someone special to be there and still just, want to be in your life even when shit hits rock bottom.

23. fear(s)

im honestly not sure. i never really have been.. i mean.. hm. idk. spiders maybe. but lately theyve bugged me less. usually instead of freaking out if i see spiders or bugs now i just help them get outside so i dont think that counts anymore.. idk. im sure im afraid of something, everyone is. i just.. dont really know what it is. one of my friends said i may be afraid of the unknown which is possible. *Shrugs*

24. height

5 ft 9 in!

25. role model

dont really have one

26. idol(s)

nani the fuck this is the same question

27. things i hate

i HATE people that treat customer services like shit. i hate lying and i hate high school drama(tm). i also hate eggplants.

28. i'll love you if...

you be yourself

29. favourite film(s)

the chronicles of naria, httyd 1 and 2, little mermaid, anastasia, inkheart

30. favourite tv show(s)

how i met your mother, stranger things, kekkai sensen, your lie in april, brooklyn 99, firefly, voltron

31. 3 random facts

1. ive jumped off a cliff

2. jellyfish can produce asexually as well as sexually. they can clone themselves!

3. mitochondria is still the powerhouse of the cell

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?

girls

33. something you want to learn

i want to learn more about marine biology, i miss it

34. most embarrassing moment

mm wasnt the most embarrassing and it was actually kinda funny but its recent-ish so.

last year in instrumental rep class we were at the concert hall and this pianist was playing for us on stage, pro and fancy from out of country and everything. and i hadnt been getting much sleep so when she started playing all this slow and pretty music i passed tf out. problem was. i was sitting in front of my entire class/all my friends. and apparently just as she finished a song i started laughing in my sleep just like a mumbly “heheheh” but it was deadass quiet so EVERYONE heard it. and when someone nudged me awake like, everyone was looking at me but i didnt know why. and i went the entire fucking class not knowing it had happened and it wasnt until after the class ended and the performer got off stage that everyone burst out laughing and told me what happened. they fucking called me chuckles for a week lmao

35. favourite subject

music, photography, english, marine biology

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?

1. i want to be successful enough that i can repay my parents for everything theyve done for me

2. i want to be the composer for a big name film

3. its.. dumb but i just really want to be in a happy relationship. a real one. its probably not the best thing to want as a dream but ill be real, ive been in love with the idea of love ever since i was a kid and that never really went away, just my chances in believing it’s something that will happen in my life.

37. favourite actor/actress

hmm i probably have one but its not coming to mind

38. favourite comedian(s)

kevin hart

39. favourite sport(s)

i love watching ice skating, love participating in swimming. used to do it competitively

40. favourite memory

ahh its hard to pick one plus this feels a bit personal!

41. relationship status

single as a pringle.. which doesnt make sense because pringles come in packs but it rhymes so fight me ok

42. favourite book(s)

inkheart, chronicles of narnia, my sister’s keeper

43. favourite song ever

what’s up by 4 non blondes, also 7 layers by dotan

44. age you get mistaken for

early 20s

45. how you found out about your idol

bruh

46. what my last text message says

hnnng its “Good night, I love you mom!” sdfj;lkgsd

47. turn ons

ive answered this a few times before

48. turn offs

ive answered this a few times before

49. where i want to be right now

mmm, im happy where i am for now i think.

50. favourite picture of your idol

ffs

51. starsign

Sagittarius 

52. something i'm talented at

music, photography

53. 5 things that make me happy

1. my friends

2. my plushie/soft things

3. music

4. rain

5. the fact that each new day is a chance for something new. idk why but that fact has just made me feel better a lot

54. something thats worrying me at the moment

my friends. theyre all going through a lot and i want to help but i can only do so much

55. tumblr friends

you know who you are bbs

56. favourite food(s)

this is always strangely hard for me to answer. theres an udon place back at home though that i can safely say is my fav.

57. favourite animal(s)

jellyfish, dolphins, dogs, cats, sea turtles, jorunna parva (sea bunnies), dragons

58. description of my best friend

i have a couple. both are kind and passionate as fuck. theyve been there for me through thick and thin and i wouldnt trade them for the world. theyre also going through so much fucking shit rn and i want to be there for them as much as i can

59. why i joined tumblr

because all my homestuck trash friends had one and convinced me to make one. i didnt know wtf to do on this hellsite for a solid 4 months

60. ask me anything you want

you gotta ask me anything you want my dude lmao, just pop into my inbox with whatever question you want to ask and i’ll answer it honestly

[zoeygreensimblr]

Safe and Sound (Episode 13)

"Do you think the we could relax the rules a little bit while we are on Winter Break" Tess pleads with our jailers, Don and Mum

"We may be willing to negotiate" Don offers, "What do you suggest?"

Tess and I exchange looks, we didn't even think they would consider an offer so we need to come up with something that makes us look like we are still going to take the time seriously but also need time to have fun.

"Would you be willing to allow us the last half of Wednesday, after gym time and all of Thursday off?" Tess strikes the deal. Mum and Don look at each other, Mum nods.

"Sounds reasonable" Don say but then adds "But if we see that it's having a negative effect then the offer will be revoked"

"Don't fuck it up Zoey" Tess warns me

"Tess, language" Mum scolds her and I laugh. 3 weeks of freedom from school, away from the pressure and the bullshit speeches and the bullshit people who push me down.

It was Friday afternoon, the temperature had dropped to below zero, big, heavy coats and scarves weather and the snow was starting to fall when we boarded the train to San Myshuno, we took our usual seats at the back of the carriage. It was the last day of term and the four of us were abuzz about being on holidays for the next 3 weeks.

"Mrs Plumbob was our sub for Maths last period, she let us play hangman for the whole 40 minutes because she didn't have a lesson plan" Cassie tells us

"I wish we played hangman, but no, Mr Price had to make us do advanced Trig" I groan to our group just as my phone starts buzzing in my pocket, I check the caller ID but I haven't got the number saved in my phone, ugh probably just a telemarketer who will try and sell me carpet so I decline the call but the number calls me again straight away, I answer it against my better judgement.

"Hello?"

"Zoey did you reject my call?" says Angus on the other end

"I didn't have this number saved" at this point just realising He's calling me from the landline at the gym.

"Feeling the love baby" he laughs, "I'm calling to tell you to tell the others not to come in today, this storm is picking up and they may not be able to get home. I'll meet you at the station, I'm closing up. Tell the others we will do an extra hour on Monday"

I got off the phone and broke the news to the group who were more excited about getting out of training now than starting holidays

"Come back to my house, we've got a booze and movies" Tess asks Cassie and Declan. I hug them goodbye at the next station and travel the rest of the train ride alone, in silence.

Angus was waiting for me on the platform when I arrived, dressed in a long sleeve T-shirt, leather jacket and black pants, blonde hair hanging just above his eyes, he beams when he sees me, I run towards him and he pulls me in for a tight hug.

"Hey Princess, I missed you" He tells me and kisses my forehead

"You saw me on Wednesday afternoon" I remind him but truthfully I missed him too

"I saw you for an hour on Wednesday, with Your Sister, Her boyfriend and Your best friend, I'd hardly call that quality time together" He protests

"Well I am on holidays from today for 3 weeks and the parentals have given Tess and I extra free time during the week" I tell him

"How much extra time?"He enquires

"Wednesday after 4pm until Sunday morning" I reply

"Interesting" He says, raising his eyebrows and smiling

"You're planing something aren't you?" I ask

"I may have had word with Don today" He teases

"What about? About me? What did you talk to him about?" My curiosity peaks, I can't believe  he called Don and talked about me.

"It's a surprise for the second week and only if you work on your assignments, do you have many?" He asks

"I have two, a 1000 word essay for Simlish and another for History, I've already started my Simlish one though" I tell him, "See I'm all over it"

"Thats my smart girl" he praises me as we climb in his car and drive to the apartment.

"Can I cook tonight?" I ask him, when your step father owns one of the fanciest restaurants around you pick up a few cooking skills.

"What do you have in mind?" He asks suspicious

"A roast?" I reply

"With vegetables?"He asks

"Yes" I tell him, smiling

"Not just potatoes either? Something green?" He is onto my game plan

"Yes Angus, I'll cook you broccoli and beans too" I say, rolling my eyes at him

"Can I help?" He asks and I think he genuinely wants to learn

"Yep, I'll teach you" I tell him, kissing him on the cheek

After dinner we lay on the couch together and watch the storm picking up outside, thats the great thing about the penthouse, theres windows everywhere and seeing the city covered in a blanket of snow is amazing.

"I got you a bottle of vodka and we can watch movie, it's tradition remember?" He offers

"What movies do you have?" I ask, impressed that he remembers the tradition I have with Tess, I feel a little guilty about leaving her tonight

"Honestly I don't think you'd like anything from my collection but we can look through Immie's, she's got heaps" He tells me

"How about we drink and I don't force you to watch some romantic movie that would most likely bore you" I suggest and he laughs, grabs the vodka, 2 glasses and pineapple juice, pours our drinks and we sit in front of the fire, me nestled between his legs, one of his arms wrapped around me.

"It wouldn't bore me Zoey" he tells me after a moment of silence, "I actually like romantic movies believe it or not"

"I just assumed that when you said I wouldn't like your movie collection it was just full of Actions and Thrillers and Horrors" I explain

"Well it is, you're right about that but..." He trails off

"But?" I press him and he looks at me embarrassed.

"I like reading Jane Austen novels and I then like to watch movies based on the books" He tells me ashamed, I turn my body around to face him, wrapping my legs around his waist

"Thats bit sexy Theodore" I kiss him, "So you could write my Simlish essay then?" I joke with him and he laughs

"What's the topic?" He asks, considering it

"Critical study of Literature, we read Pride and Prejudice this term so they ask you to respond to a quotation from the text and ask how it is reflected in the novel"I explain while I busy myself kissing his neck

"I can help you if you want, I did Advanced Simlish for year 12" He tells me as I feel his hand slip under my dress and he sits it inside of my panties, his palm cradles my bottom

"You studied Advanced Simlish?" I ask surprised as I let my hands go on an exploration mission under his t-shirt

"Yeah, Advanced Simlish, Advanced Maths, Physical Education and Health, Physics, Business Studies and Design and Technology" he tells me proudly as he lifts me up onto my knees and slides my panties down my thighs, "Is this ok Zoey?" He asks my permission

"Yes" I tell him, anticipating the touch of his thumb on my clitoris, he starts working in a soft, circular motion, it feels electric, "Why didn't you go to Uni?" I ask him

"I love that you're always ready for it baby" He tells me, ignoring my question and then whispers "Take off your dress and remove your bra". I do as he orders and I see him reach into his pants pocket and pull out two items; a condom and the silver vibrator we bought on Saturday. He turns it on and it makes a low buzzing noise. He's looking at me as I'm studying the new, foreign object, he's reading my face and knows exactly what I'm thinking.

"I won't hurt you baby, you'll like it, I promise" he assures me and I believe him. He slowly slides the vibrator inside me and I feel it's magic straight away, my whole body working in time with every slow thrust Angus gives. Involuntary moans escape my mouth

"Do you like it?" He is curiously studying me, I nod yes, unable to give audible response as I'm concentrating on the building pleasure inside me, this feels different than the other times, better. I'm so close to that finish line, as much as I don't want this to end and I hear him whisper in my ear "cum for me baby", it sends me over the edge and I feel my whole body shutter as I collapse onto his chest.

"Thank you" I say, appreciating what he's just done for me on so many levels

"You're welcome baby but we're not done yet, catch your breath and we'll start the main round" He smiles that cheeky smile at me and I melt, "Zoey?"

"Yes?" I ask, lifting my head to look at him

"I'm still wearing clothes" He tells me as if I hadn't noticed

"Well you made me undress myself, so I thought it was only fair to return the favour" I remind him, laughing

"I was a bit busy at the time though" He counteracts as he removes his T-shirt and I smile at him innocently

"Excuses won't get you naked Theodore" I laugh but I help him with removing his pants

"Fuck you're cheeky" He smiles at me as he kicks off his boxers, reaches over and grabs the condom he threw on the floor earlier, tears the package open with his teeth and sits it on the tip of his member as he takes my hand and guides it to the condom

"Roll it down" He instructs me

"What if I do it wrong and it comes off or breaks?" I panic

"It won't, I promise" He tells me and I do as he asks, he's so hard. He has me knee above him as he guides himself into me, I feel every muscle tighten as he enters me, "Relax baby, just think of it like our silver friend you enjoyed" he reassures me and I ease into it, coming down to wrap my legs around his waist again. We start off slow, me moving in time with him as he gets in deeper and deeper

"You feel amazing" He tells me as he picks up the pace and I match him, this feels unbelievable, nothing like last week.

"Fuck" escapes my mouth and he smiles at me

"Are we enjoying this princess?" He asks me

"Mmm yes" is all I can manage to reply

"Do you wanna go faster?" He asks and I can only nod my head yes. He pulls me in closer to him and I feel him penetrate me deeper with every thrust, he has one hand on my bottom, pushing me forward and I feel his other hand moving up my thigh, he places his thumb back where it was in round one, he starts the same circular motion and don't know how much longer I can hold back, I can hear him moaning near my ear, his own breathing is short and sharp

"Cum with me" He orders me and I let go in an explosion of built up pleasure

"I love you"I tell him breathlessly

"I love you too Zo, Fuck that was good" He says, also trying to catch him breath. He slides himself out of me and pulls the condom off, "I'm so proud of you baby" He praises me

"Why?" I ask confused

"I thought you may of been scared off after the first time" He explains

"I kind of hoped it got easier after the first time, considering how many people rave about it" I tell him laughing and he kisses me softly

"Shower?" he asks and I nod, jumping to my feet and suddenly becoming more aware of how many windows there are upstairs and they all face other apartment blocks, I grab my dress and throw it back on.

"Angus can the people in the other apartments see us right now?" I ask panicked

"Possibly can" He says laughing as he stands in full view of the window and that's when I noticed he has a tattoo on his left shoulder blade of 3 birds flying, I reach out to touch it, "She sees me naked three times and tonight is the first time you find the tattoo" He laughs to himself

"I like it, when did you get it?" I ask him

"2 years ago, they represent freedom from being caged" He explains

"Is that how you felt, with Steph, like you were caged?" I ask him concerned

"I felt like I couldn't do anything right, my past was always being thrown back in my face. I felt trapped, she controlled everything I did, who I could talk to, where I could go. Steph cheating on me didn't break me, it set me free" He opens up to me and I worry that we will end up the same way, "You're not like that Zoey" He tells me, reading my face, "And I'm not that guy anymore either, I put you first, I learnt that and I am always going to be honest with you, an open book, oh and by the way the windows are tinted, no one can see in, I was playing with you, I'd never do that to you baby" He reassures me and I laugh

After our shower I suggest we watch a movie, knowing now he can watch a RomCom with me without being bored.

"Can I pick?" he asks, smiling

"Yes but nothing scary coz I won't sleep if I think theres a ghost or monster in the room" I plead with him. He goes to his collection and comes back with 'Bridget Jones' Diary', my favourite movie and I'm surprised he has it.

"It's an adaptation of Pride and Prejudice and a favourite of mine" He informs me

"It's my favourite too" I exclaim, I love this guy, he just keeps surprising me

"I got you a present too" He tells me

"You really didn't have to get me anything" I exclaim, I feel bad when anyone buys me anything

"I wanted to, I want you to feel at home here Zoey, you can leave clothes here too if you want to, saves you having to drag an overnight bag around every Friday" He offers and I kiss him as thanks, "Do you want your present?" He asks me

"Yes please" I reply

He takes me back to the kitchen, opens up a cupboard and presents me with a new popcorn machine.

"Thank you so much" I throw my arms around him

"Wow, imagine your reaction when I buy you a car" He says, laughing. I pull back and look him in the eye.

"You can't buy me a car Angus, thats just way too much" I explain

"Hush Zoey, make your popcorn and we will watch the movie"He replies

[sadrien]

goodbyes & hellos

on ao3

im so so so late but hey this is for first day of prompt week for @thinkoutsidethelovesquare​!!!! day one: wrong number

this was a lot of fun tbh and ive been dying to write this ship. alyas texts are italicized, adriens are underlined on ao3, just bold here bc tumblrs a butt. shoutout to @reyxa​ for the title <3

enjoy!

Alya narrows her eyes at the new message that lights up her phone. It’s an unknown number that she doesn’t recognize — not that she’s given her number to anyone recently — and it’s also seven in the morning . Anyone how knows her at all should know that she doesn’t wake up before at least nine on the weekends. (And that has nothing to do with the fact that she doesn’t sleep during the week and tends to go to bed after two in the morning.)

She groans as another message shows up on the screen. She squints and lets the messages flow in, figuring she can tell the person they’ve got the wrong number after they’ve finished whatever they have to say. Or she can decide that it’s unimportant and ignore it and go back to sleep.

She likes her second plan the best.

unknown number: Hi!

unknown number: Just wanted to let you know the start time for today has been moved from 10 to 9:15

unknown number: My father has a meeting at 1300 so he wants to get it all done as soon as possible

unknown number: And I know you mentioned wanting to have him on set yesterday

unknown number: I hope it’s not too much of an inconvenience! Your agent should be calling you soon, but I thought I’d give you a heads up

Alya squints at the screen. She doesn’t want to care but she’s curious. And curiousity killed the cat and all that but she’s used to letting her nosiness get the best of her.

unknown number: agents???

unknown number: 1st of all srry u have the wrong number

unknown number: 2nd of all were u talking to a movie star or smth???????

unknown number: book writer??

unknown number: what kinda person needs an agent

unknown number: Oh I’m sorry! I must’ve gotten the wrong number from someone

unknown number: I’m really sorry if I was bothering you

Alya rolls her eyes.

unknown number: u woke me up but its chill cause now im curious

unknown number: Curious? About what?

unknown number: way 2 keep avoiding the question

unknown number: ???

unknown number: u said the person u meant to text has an agent

unknown number: how fancy r they

unknown number: Oh! She’s a model!

Alya’s eyes widen. The most famous person she knows is that thirteen year old that was in her school who has ten thousand subscribers on YouTube because she makes lyric videos. The second is a boy who has a few thousand instagram followers because he has nice abs and lots of white boy clothing and muscle shirts.

unknown number: u kno a model????????

unknown number: Uhh

unknown number: I’m not sure how much personal information I should be giving to a stranger

Alya sighs. So close.

unknown number: its fine dude (dude? u good w that? lmk if u arent) i getchu

unknown number: u can just stop responding if u dont wanna talk

She locks her phone and slides it back under her pillow. She stares at the ceiling for a few more minutes, wondering if she’ll be able to fall back asleep. As much as she’d like to take the train back to dreamville, she can’t. Because now she’s awake and now she’s wondering. And once she stops wondering, she doesn’t stop.

She’ll probably stop thinking about this random wrong number in a few days and in a few months, she’ll forget about them entirely but…

Ugh.

Sleep definitely isn’t an option anymore.

Leaving her phone in her bed, she pads to the kitchen, twisting her hair up into a messy bun as she does so. No one is up yet — of course they aren’t, it’s seven on a Saturday and everyone is taking advantage of every precious minute of sleep they can get — so she has the run of the house to herself.

So she makes herself some coffee and a bowl of cereal and turns to television on. Her initial plan is to just leave it on whatever channel that’s playing when she first turns it on, and luckily the twins were the last ones to use it. Saturday morning cartoons. Score.

Alya stirs sugar in her coffee as Cyber Chase plays in the background. It’s not much more than background noise, it’s the middle of an episode and she doesn’t really know what’s happening, but she does snort at a few of the bad jokes.

“You’re up early,” her mom says before dropping a kiss on the top of Alya’s head.

Alya hums. “Got a few text messages and they woke me up.” She notes how her mom purposefully avoids eye contact as she opens a cabinet. Alya rolls her eyes and eats a spoonful of cereal.

“School friends?” her mom asks carefully.

“Yes,” Alya lies. Better than her mom asking more questions. The biggest one being why were you talking to a complete stranger?

“Are you going to see them before we leave?”

Alya glues her eyes to the TV. “If they’re around.”

Her mom makes an unimpressed sound and Alya resists the urge to roll her eyes. She texted a few of her friends the other week, but the conversation was awkward and stilted. They all had the same sort of idea about cutting ties.  

Alya sighs and puts down her spoon, twisting around in her seat to face her mom. “I promise I’m talking to them.”

Her mom gives her that look— the one where her lips purse and a crease between her eyebrows that’s becoming more and more permanent; the one that says she wants to push for more details, but won’t unless they’re volunteered first. Which Alya is not doing, thank you very much. “If you say so, honey,” her mom says, turning her attention to the breakfast she’s making.

Alya stares down into her cereal bowl.

Time to evacuate to her bedroom.

She finishes her cereal as quickly as she can without choking and dumps her bowl and spoon in the sink as she passes it, taking her coffee with her to her room. New plan: curl up in bed with her laptop and hope her mom just leaves her alone until they move.

Alya’s almost forgotten about her phone by the time she flops onto her bed. It vibrates almost as soon as she opens her laptop. She frowns as she pulls it out from under her pillow.

unknown number: Dude is fine for me

unknown number: He/him pronouns please

unknown number: Thanks for asking I really appreciate it, actually

unknown number: People don’t always ask

Plan trashed. This is a better plan.

unknown number: she/her for me

unknown number: and no prob man

unknown number: i wasnt gonna assume ur gender

unknown number: ok that mightve sounded bad but i didnt mean it in a bad way like the ‘lol dont assume my gender’ way jerks do sometime i meant it in like a genuine

unknown number: if u have smth u wanna say u should say it because i am very tired and i can go on for a while

Whoops.

Alya can’t say she’s known for her stellar first impressions but she usually doesn’t ramble her way into an awkward corner. She mindlessly flips through apps as she waits for a response.

unknown number: Don’t worry about it! I didn’t take it the wrong way or anything

Alya smiles to herself as she responds. He keeps leaving her openings which is nice. Based off his initial reaction, she thought he’d shut this down as fast as possible.

She realizes this is probably a little weird. But it’s the most exciting thing to happen to her since school let out so…

unknown number: so whats up stranger??

unknown number: b4 u ask im just sitting in my room doing nothing but text u so thats my morning

unknown number: I actually have work soon, so that’s fun

Alya raises her eyebrows. She forgot age was something else she didn’t know yet.

unknown number: oo work that sounds fun

unknown number: what do u do???

unknown number: I work for my dad, it isn’t anything special

unknown number: But it gives me something to do with my time so I don’t mind that much

unknown number: If I randomly stop responding without warning, that’s why

unknown number: good 2 kno

unknown number: can i ask what u do 4 ur dad or is that 2 personal

unknown number: I uh… I just do whatever he needs me to do

unknown number: I don’t get paid or anything but

unknown number: ay it still works as a resume builder

unknown number: Yeah exactly!

unknown number: thats cool that ur dad can get u a job!! my mom and dad could never w their jobs so i just suffer

unknown number: not that thats any different from what i would do anyway as a teenager

Alright, perfect. She’s brought up the age question in a really clunky and awkward way. Better than nothing.

unknown number: Oh how old are you?

unknown number: I’m 15

Alya lets out a sigh of relief.

unknown number: ayy same!

unknown number: just ur fav teenage superhero blogger

unknown number: doing nothing with her life

unknown number: You like superheroes?

unknown number: yeah!! i love comic books. you??

unknown number: I don’t have time to read many but yeah! I’ve always loved Spiderman

unknown number: wonder woman is my g i r l

unknown number: superheroes are just so cool

She waits a few minutes before she decides that he must have gone off to work. Bonding over superheroes, that’s good. A shared interest. She scrolls through their conversation, rereading some of the earlier messages before she creates a contact for him. She makes the name ‘stranger’ and leaves it at that.

It’s not like they’re meeting up or anything. Even if he is an ax murderer, can’t kill her if she never sends him her location.

Alya spends the next couple of hours avoiding her mom as much as possible. She takes her sisters to the park and then goes to the library after she brings them home.

She doesn’t want to talk about it.

She’s clicking through a webcomic that she missed a few weeks worth of updates when her phone buzzes. She glances down, expecting it to be a text from her mom asking if she has any plans or to do chores or something, but is pleasantly surprised to see a message from her stranger.

stranger: Sorry about that, work ran long

stranger: Admittedly, I don’t know very much about Wonder Woman, but she looks very awesome

unknown number: !!!!

unknown number: when ive got more time remind me to tell u all abou t her

unknown number: and to rec some comic books even if u dont have time

stranger: Is she your favorite?

Alya sits back in her chair. This conversation is going to be a long one.

Alya finds herself randomly texting her stranger for the next few days. He doesn’t always respond quickly, but he responds eventually, no matter how weird her original message.

That’s more than she can say for most of her friends.

She texts him as she’s sitting on the counter in her kitchen, stirring a pot.

unknown number: hey stranger whats up

stranger: Just reading, you?

unknown number: making box mac n cheese

stranger: Sounds fun

unknown number: yeah im gonna eat it straight from the pot

The three dots bounce on the screen as the stranger takes his time with the next message. Alya snorts and turns off the stove, straining the pasta and moving to the fridge to find butter and cheese. He’s found his words by the time she’s letting the butter melt in the pot.

stranger: Straight from the pot? Why?

unknown number: because i live life on the edge

unknown number: and also because im too lazy to clean the dish later

stranger: You know what? That’s fair

Sometimes, Alya thinks that she probably shouldn’t think about someone who she doesn’t even know the name of as often as she does, let alone text him as much as she does. But sometimes she’ll see something, and she’ll immediately think of him. Or she’ll just be randomly upset and feel the strong urge to pick up the phone and see if he’s available to vent to.

She knows it’s kind of weird, but she can’t help herself.

One night, at around two in the morning, she finds herself messaging him.

unknown number: hey did i ever mention i was moving

She’s almost asleep, slightly more okay than she was before she sent the text, when he responds.

stranger: You haven’t but we also don’t talk about where we live

Alya stares at the screen for a long moment, the bright light in the darkness making everything on the screen blur into nothing. She just feels kind of numb.

unknown number: yeah

unknown number: like 8 hours away from where i live now

stranger: Wow that’s a big move

unknown number: yeah

stranger: I’m guessing you don’t want to go?

unknown number: not really

unknown number: did u know ur my only friend right now

stranger: I am?

unknown number: me and my other friends sort of cut ties

stranger: The internet exists

stranger: Phones exist

stranger: FaceTime and Skype both kind of suck, but they exist

unknown number: yeah i guess

unknown number: i guess its just too hard for any of us to try

stranger: I have no idea how far apart we live

stranger: We’re doing just fine

unknown number: yeah

unknown number: yeah ur right

One of Alya’s small comforts that comes to mind whenever she thinks about moving is the fact that she’ll have her phone on her and a portable charger. Her stranger will be with her every step of the way.

He’d managed to get her to talk to some of her friends. She doesn’t really think it’ll last once she’s in Paris, but the attempt is nice. And it gives her other people to talk to for the rest of the summer.

It’s too early in the morning when they leave for the last time for her to get really emotional about moving. All she has the energy to do is to take a picture of her old apartment, caption it ‘one last goodbye to marseille’, and save it before sending it to her friends over Snapchat. Before she falls asleep against the car window, she texts it to her stranger.

She wakes up to a new text among the goodbyes from her friends.

stranger: Have a nice car ride! I’ll let you know when I get back from work <3

Alya hides her smile from her sisters and screenshots the text for later.

She texts him from the floor of her new bedroom while her dad starts moving boxes. They’ve been in the process of moving for a while now, shipping most of their things to Paris beforehand. Now all that remains is the actual unpacking.

Alya doesn’t have the energy for that. She just lays on the floor and stares at the ceiling for a while. Then she picks up her phone and sends him a text.

It’s been about an hour since they last talked. She’d talked to him for a good majority of the car ride, only stopping when he was busy and ending the conversation when they arrived so she could get her things out of the car and help her sisters with theirs. She’d sent him a picture of her empty bedroom and said ‘let the unpacking begin :P’. He’d responded with a ‘Good luck!!’ and ‘I’ll let you get to work!’

Alya’s thumb hovers over the send button for a few seconds. She’s never really pushed him for any sort of personal information before.

New city, new Alya. Or something.

unknown number: hey just wondering

unknown number: what do u have me in ur phone as??

unknown number: i have u in here as stranger

stranger: Your contact name?

stranger: Uh awkward but you don’t?

stranger: You’re the only one I just have the number for, so I know who you are that way

Alya reads his texts a few times before she responds. She doesn’t know what she expects in return, but she figures she has nothing to lose.

unknown number: im alya

unknown number: in case u were wondering

stranger: Hi Alya

stranger: I’m Adrien

[ecotone99]

[MF] Sunday Scaries

The conversation formatting doesnt hold on reddit copy paste, so its much better read thru link

Linking at Top to not spoil the end - hope thats OK!

https://www.casualblasphemy.com/blog/sundayscaries

​

------------------------------------------

Jesus Christ and Other Swear words

Volume II: Anxiety Rainbow

A Slower Burn to Fiery Finish. About 10-15 minutes

Chapter 2, 3 or 7, not sure yet.

​

​

Chapter III: Sunday Night Scream Into the Void

I lie (awake) to myself

A feeling of impending doom. So many emails. Existential dread and the Sunday Scaries.

I cannot sleep, it is nearly midnight. I have so much to do this week.

I lie awake and try to think of all the embarrassing things other people have done.

I can't think of any, so I go back to remembering my own social failings.

The time I tripped in front of my Crush age 14. My disastrous bangs of just last year. The time I mispronounced Worcheschertshishire in front of my cute coworker. The 23 blocks I walked with toilet paper stuck to my foot and that afternoon tanning in the park with a tampon string dangling from my bikini bottoms. Everyone remembers. I am sure of it. I farted once on a conference call.

Monday is only a few hours away. So many emails and the dishes sit soaking for a third day. I shouldn't have slept in today. I have so much to do tomorrow. I think about every time i've fucked up in my past 30 years.

My anxiety builds and I try again to refocus my attention. I try to remember all the embarrassing things other people have done, but I literally cannot think of any. I sort of remember one of my friends shitting his pants. Was that the day I walked into the sliding glass door. Do you think he remembers? Oh god, was it me that poped my pants? Oh jeez, i said poped, not pooped. Im talking out loud to myself.

Thank god no one is here.

I feel lonely.

----

I eat a CBD chocolate and feel the anxiety of impending doom. So many emails.

I remember. I remember every embarrassing thing I have done in my entire life. I have so much to do this week. So many emails. I have a meeting tomorrow and I don't feel prepared. That time I was left hanging for a high five with my hand in the air. I looked like Hitler with no friends. It is Sunday and life is Scary. So much to do this week. Were they laughing at me? I feel lonely. No one talked to me today. I feel like the Pluto of my friend group.

I decide to crowdsource some self esteem and climb on Tinder.

Left

Left

Right

Match!

Left

Left

Oh damn this guy is hot.

Damn, 5’10

Left

Right

Match!

Left

Left

Right

Match!

Right

Match!

Right

Match!

Every time I swipe right it's a Match. I feel attractive and desirable

Left

Left

ew

Left

Left

Double ew!

Left

Right

Right

Nothing. What!?

I lower my standards

Right

Right

Right

Nothing. Nothing. Nothing

Sunday Feels Scary Again. I have so much to do tomorrow. I don't want to play the game anymore. I fear rejection from strangers. Kinda horny tho. I survey my matches and read messages:

“Hey”

“Wanna Fuck?”

“Nice weather Today”

“Show me your bobs?”

“Nice Feet”

A profile stands out

Blake

6”2’ “Ive never shoed a horse, but I told a Cow to go home once”

I don't really get it, but he's HOT. That fish he caught is HUGE! I climb out of my comfort zone and message first. I've never done this before

“Hey” she wrote with butterflies

….

…….

………..

18 minutes pass. Nothing.

I go back to swiping unenthusiastically

Right

Right

Nothing.

I feel like a Moth in a world of Butterflies. Undesirable.

OH GOD. I research gravity blankets and take a xanax. I think of Cocoons.

I fall asleep lonely horny disappointed anxious and 8% numb. So many emails. Maybe I can do the dishes tomorrow after work, the gym, and picking up my prescriptions. I shouldn't have messaged him. I need groceries. That time I tripped on the bleachers and Becky laughed at me. I run through the grocery list in my head. Eggs, avocados, kombucha, spinach, Shame, paper towels, CBD chocolates. I feel weird.

------

I survive another week with espresso and antidepressants. It was hard. I am so tired. I am so tired all the time. Its sunday night and I feel The Doom coming again. I batten the hatches and prepare to wait out the emotional storm under the weight of my new Gravity Blanket. Its heavy and sweaty and I regret buying it. My anxiety rises to new highs and I feel like an idiot. Thank god no one is here. I feel lonely.

Ping!

Blake: :Me

“Hey ;) still up?”

I think about unmatching to teach him a lesson for not replying to me last week, but digital or not, I really need this distracting attention.

“Maybe ;) whatcha doing?”

Trying not to think about Monday LOL

LOLOL Same Same. Sunday Scaries :o

LOL I KNOW! Just gotta get through this week,

I am getting a puppy on Friday!

Puppy! What kind!?

A Frenchi :) her name is Luna

OMG NEED!

You have any pets?

Nooooo :(

You can come play with mine!

Cats or Dogs?

YES PLZ! I grew up with dogs :)

What was the name of your first pet?

Daisy :) she was so sweet

Awww, where did you grow up?

Seattle, just moved for a new job

It's hard being in a new city!

Well I can show you around!

What is your job?

Never been to Seattle, were you born there?

Born in Suburbia, lol

a little town nearby called Auburn

I work for a company that has meetings

I have a friend from Auburn!

LoL what do you meet about?

No way!

We meet about other meetings

Yea, did you got to Westside Elementary?

Eastside

Oh nice, her mom was a teacher there

Did you have Mrs. Ellison for 1st grade English?

I don't remember a Mrs. Ellison?

I had a Mr. Gardner

Oh lol. U like cars?

Sort of

I just got a new one :)

What was the make and model of your first car?

Wow! You are having quite the year!

Lol 1994 black honda civic. The dream

You sound like a Capricorn

Virgo!

Oh nice, when is your birthday?

August 24th, 1990

Just got a pic of my puppy, wanna see?

OMG YES

206-390-0345

I like Capricorns ;)

Oh god that sounded desperate

Texted you

Didn't get it!

Tried again

Nothing :(

Lol new phone too, I think its fucked tho

Whats your email, I wanna show you my bb pup!

Lol look at you Mr. New

[VeganJessica3@gmail.com](mailto:VeganJessica3@gmail.com)

….

……

……..

Did you send it?

…..

Hello?

Fal Asleep? lol

Ping!

An email arrives to my racing heart. He's so inquisitive! New car and a puppy! I wonder what he does for a living? Such a Gentleman, that was a whole hour of texting and he didn't even ask for nudes. I click the notification but my email won't open.

Please login to continue. I type my password “Daisy123”

Incorrect password/email combination

Please try again

Oh, is it lowercase?

******3

Please Try Again

*****3

Please Try Again

******3

Please Try Again

Ugh im so tired, I can't even type right. I'll leave it for morning

--------

MondayVegan Jessica III sleeps well in dreams of Blake, Frenchi’s and Avocados under the weight of her anti-anxiety gravity blanket. She wakes with a smile and grabs her phone eagerly.

Please Try Again

Please Try Again

Vegan Jessica III eats her last free-range Avocado on a piece of whole-wheat gluten-free non-cruelty noGMO carboloaf. Num!

Please Try Again

Fucking Annoying!

I switch over to my work email and begin responding to CC threads as I walk to the train. I meet with my team and we plan our next meeting. We have a great plan to plan.

I get home exhausted. I am so tired. We met for three hours and planned for three more days of planning meetings about meeting plans. I log in to tinder and check my messages. Nothing. I take a xanax and go to sleep. The dishes are molding and i'm out of avocados.

Tuesday

I wake stressed and skip breakfast. I head into work and drink espresso. We meet again to discuss our plan to plan. Everything goes as planned and we adjourn. I get out of work 15 minutes early and swing by CVS Pharmacy for LaCroix and drugs.

Some freak in a fedora oggles my breasts through my oversized sweater. What is he even looking at?

“Hi, yes, prescription pickup for Vegan Jessica III. It should have been called in Monday”

“Sure thing, insurance and ID please. Have a seat, it'll be about 15 minutes”

Pharmacists are just drug baristas, change my mind. I wait 45 minutes for the man in the never-dirtied lab coat to grab a prepackaged bottle of prozac from the wall. I hand him my credit card.

“Im sorry Ma’am, your card was declined, do you have another?”

The word ‘Ma’am’ turns three of my pubic hairs grey. It makes me kind of miss that creep in the fedora surveying my body.

Are you sure? Can you try again

Yes ma’am, the card is declined. Do you have another Ma’am?

Ma’am

Can you try calling them? I left my debit at home and don't have any cash.

I glance at my Fitbit. The time is 6:01pm

Its after 6pm Ma’am, you'll have to wait till tomorrow.

I leave the CVS and the pharmacists spends the next 30 minutes placing the bottle of pills back on the shelf.

----

I go home feeling frustrated. I skip the mailbox, dishes, dustbunnies and head straight for my bed. I pull the gravity blanket over my head like a ghost and feel a little better. I eat a half a pound of CBD chocolate and feel much better.

I log into Tinder. Fucking Blake ghosted. Unmatched. Under my blanket I get scared of ghosts and eat another ¼ pound of CBD chocolate.

Wednesday

I wake feeling like shit. I don't know why. I feel stressed. I call in sick to work and take a xanax and go back to bed. I awake to a phonecall from an unknown number. Fucking spamassrobocalls. I scream FUCK YOU to 1s and 0s. There's a panic rising in my throat.

I haven't checked my personal email in days now and try to log back in. I click password recovery and an email is sent to my old college email | [VegetarianJessica@college.edu](mailto:VegetarianJessica@college.edu). Ugh I can't believe I used to eat honey and drink milk with my coffee; I feel ashamed of my former self. It feels like a Sunday, but it's only wednesday.

I try to login to my old college email to recover my password for my post-college email.

I try to remember my old password

Please Try again

I try all my old combinations

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Lockout timer 29:59..

29:58….

29:57….

Ugh I hate this shit.

Trying to recover a password to recover a password. Did I type it wrong? Was it capitalized? Am I just not remembering it right? Was the ‘I’ a “!” ?? Was there 123 at the end, or maybe beginning?

I need to set my passwords to things I can never forget. Maybe take a lesson from Sunday. Shame and Trauma seem to make for fantastic passwords.

MyFatherAbandonedOurFamilyIn1997!

That's not something im likely to forget

I spend the next 29 minutes finally doing the dishes and feel a little better.

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Lockout timer 59:59

FUCK

I hate this shit. I click the password recovery button on my college email and a third is sent to my very first email address. [Jessica1990AuburnWA@aol.com](mailto:Jessica1990AuburnWA@aol.com)

I go to AOL.com and try to login

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

Please Try again

It feels like im opening those Russian Dolls. Every time I open one, another is there. The Russian Nesting Dolls of Digital Frustration. Please Try Again Later.

Recover the password

to recover the password

to recover the password

Please Try Again

I channel my frustration and hit the gym. Pilates class with Pontious. I stop on the way home and Scream into the Void. I feel a little better.

I check the mailbox before the stairs.

I turn the key and an avalanche spills out. Envelope after envelope, it seems unending. They just keep coming. The cascade flow dries to a dribble and I reach inside to scoop the rest of my mail out.

My arms are full of dead trees and I feel sad. Plus its like super heavy after an hour of cross planking. I ascend the stairs and unlock the door with my keys in my mouth. I push the door open with my forehead and dump the heavy mess of envelopes and magazines on the floor.

A Victoria Secret catalogue catches my eye. I make a mental note of my despise for their company message and start perusing the pages. What kind of image are they putting in the heads of young girls. False standards of beauty. Where are the real women! That bra is like super cute tho. I order three in different colors but my card is declined. The bras never come, its ok tho, they wouldn't have fit me anyway.

When my card is declined I think of Blake’s rejection again. Ghosted. What an asshole. Whatever he's probably just another pig who gets off to Victoria Secret models and supports an impossible standard of beauty. I am now convinced Victoria’s real Secret is mainstream distribution of introductory pornography to young boys in suburbia. That's a big mental leap to take from subquality prethought, but I think it's important to note where some of these idolized false standards of beauty start. They start with aging young Mother’s ordering VS products and catalogs to catch renewed interest from their lazily inattentive husbands and trickledown pornoEconomics recycles the catalogs to prepubescent boys. Hidden and stolen, they are a prime middle-school currency. The image of Desire becomes fixed in pubescent development and the path upscycles again.

I throw the catalog away disgusted and pick up my copy of the much more realistic Vogue. I eat more CBD chocolate and forget to call my credit card company. I fall asleep with fragrant advertisements and two miles of photoshop-smoothed Gigi Hadid legs on my face.

Friday

It's a beautiful morning and i'm feeling rested. I don't know what happened to Thursday. We have a brief meeting about next week's meeting and are dismissed early. Summer Fridays are the best! I meet up with my besties and we dress up to impossible standards of beauty.

Thin pink straps patterned with “VS VS VS” loop my shoulders out of my strapless black dress. Clash is in. I think it looks cute even tho the bra doesn't fit well. I lace up my gladiator platform cork wedges and we head out for a night of dancing.

I dance next to my ugliest friend and bask in double attention.

Buy you a Drink?

Wanna Dance?

Ever Ride a Motorcycle?

All eyes on me. I dance and twirl and snort the night away. This cocaine is fantastic. My credit card still doesn't work so I have boys buy me drinks. I black out a bit and wake up in my Uber home. Its light out and the birds won't shut up about the stupid sun. My heart is beating arhythmically and I feel weird. A feeling of impending doom is brewing and it makes me feel weirder - it's not even Sunday.

I sober up a bit, but can't sleep. I decide to finish the vial of cocaine I took from that boy and do some housekeeping.

I take the trash out and open my computer. I feel inspired to clean and conquer.

I will recover my password!

I see a button for ‘alternate recovery options’ on my ancient @aol email and click

A series of questions challenge my identity

“Date of Birth”

August 24th, 1990

“What was the name of your first Pet?”

Daisy

“What was the name of your 1st grade English Teacher?

Mr. Gardner

“What City Were you Born in?”

Auburn

“What was the Make and Model of your First Car?”

1994 Black Honda Civic

And just like that I'm in! I recover my password and recover my password and recover my password.

The russian dolls reassemble and my anxiety plummets

--------

----

---

Until I open Gmail to a Nightmare

The realization grips me. The Saturday Scaries are Real. I spring to the 4 foot foyer of my apartment where the non-fashion-catalog remainder of my mail avalanche sits piled like rubble.

I rifle through envelopes and cut my finger. It really stings. I suckle a droplet of blood and read the envelopes

Chase | Amex | Credit Karma | MasterCard | Kohls Discover Card | ATT | SPRINT | T-Mobile

Bills. Bills of all kinds. Bills of all shapes and sizes. Bills Not mine, but mine. An acre of rainforest in bills.

My iphone rings and my phone wont open. Panic Panic Panic. Saturday Scaries. I pull my bleeding finger from my mouth and the iphone recognizes my face. I answer the call

“Ma’am i'm calling from TransUnion Credit Reporting, we've seen some unusual activity on your report this week, can you confirm opening the following 227 Credit Cards on Sunday between the hours of 11pm and 4am Monday Morning?”

(This phone call 97% actually happened)

My vision spots and I hit the floor.

___

I awake Sunday. My head is throbbing and my finger hurts. I look at the papercut and it stares back with green eyes. It smells like Almond Butter, but the gross GMO kind. I put CBD oil on it and leave the house.

I head to the hospital, but my credit card is declined. My finger is green to the knuckle and it definitely feels like a Sunday.

I head home and curl up in my bed. With my green arm I pull the gravity blanket over my head and cry. I fall asleep feeling scared and not safe.

I wake to pain. The green has spread throughout my whole body. I feel weak. I need to go to work. So many emails.

I feel The DOOM

I try to lift the gravity blanket, but I am weak and it is too heavy.

The longer I stay, the weaker I become. Days pass and I miss meeting after meeting. I sweat profusely trapped inside a cocoon of anxiety. Unseen emails pile up and add to the weight. My phone is out of battery and I can't reach past the blanket for my charger. I need water. I really need water.

I feel The DOOM

I think of blood poisoning and my plummeting credit scoreThe Chrysalis hardens to reject the outside world

It becomes my Tomb. I feel safe here.

Immune to Anxiety

No emails, no meetings.

The DOOM fades to black and so do I.

submitted by /u/Beerandcabfare [link] [comments] via Blogger https://ift.tt/2QcBhf7

[chroniclesofamiddlechild]

THE DAY I SMELLED LIKE COFFEE: JAPAN DAY 9

today was the day i was going to arashiyama and it was the day i was going to go to nagoya. WOMP WOMP. i woke up early today cos i had to check out and I NEEDED TO MAXIMIZE THE TIME IN ARASHIYAMA/KYOTO. THANKFULLY, I DID NOT HAVE TO BUS ANYWHERE TODAY aka I WONT BE WASTING TIME BEING LOST! YAY

to get to arashiyama, i just had to take the subway on the JR line from kyoto station and theres an arashiyama station. EASY AS PIE!!! it took about maybe 20 minutes subway ride to get there and if you follow the hoards of people you’ll get to all the major tourist attractions such as togetsu bridge, the bamboo forest. 

unforunately, i didnt have enough time to go to iwatayama monkey park. :( honestly i dont really like monkeys/animals, but i heard the hike and the VIEW at the hike is amazing. such a shame.. especially since i had beautiful weather day at arashiyama... next time :( 

i didnt eat anything before going to arashiyama, so at this time i was STARVED. I REALLY WANTED ICE CREAM. SO I GOT ICE CREAM!! W00T. theres a lot of random ice cream shops/food shops around so i just picked a random one and i got a TOFU ICE CREAM. SO DELICIOUS. but srsly - how can someone fk up tofu ice cream? so obviously its gonna be good. 

after indulging in a breakfast ice cream, right outside was TOGETSU BRIDGE. it was very bridge-y. i don’t know how else to explain it, but it was just a bridge.

thats what you see.. from the bridge. literally.. that is it. is it nice? is it beautiful? thats for you to decide.. but i just found it not.. very.. special... it was super busy though! lots of people around. i overheard some local explain to some foreigners (IN ENGLISH) that there was a BOMB COFFEE PLACE on the other side of the bridge. #eavesdroppingFTW! so I WENT THERE!

first of all, the coffee shop is called arabica and their logo is the “%” sign. in arashiyama, their location is a small white shop with a bench outside and a LINE UP THROUGH THE DOOR. i had to wait about 15-25 minutes outside the shop and 10 mins after i ordered. i ordered the cafe au lait and i also bought a small bag of beans to bring back home. keke. BUT THE BEANS WERE NOT CHEAP! NOT CHEAP I TELL YA. for a small bag of like 200g, it was about 1300 yen which is maybe around ~$19CAD. but it was worth. the scent was SO STRONG. i just STANK like COFFEE BEANS THE WHOLE DAY I WAS TRANSPORTING cos U KNOW i already packed my suitcase and there was no way i was going to PUT IN THE BEANS IN MY LUGGAGE. 

the cafe au lait was really good. very rich... im not too much of a coffee snob, but i can kind of tell that the beans were strong~ YUM! a must go when in japan :3 

after enjoying my cafe au lait, i was going to go to the bamboo forest! luckily there were a lot of signs so i didnt get lost. there were a lot of interesting sites on the way there such as temples. i dont know what those temples were but they looked pretty. (sigh.. wish i had more time) and then FINALLY i got to the bamboo forest.

the bamboo forest was PACKED. PACKED. LIKE. SARDINES. SO MANY PEOPLE. and you know... i was expecting a serene area where its quiet cos youre in a freaking forest where the bamboo is surrounding you BUT I WAS SO WRONG. people WERE SO LOUD and just like stopping everywhere. PACKED EVERYWHERE. but the bamboo forest was really pretty and smaller than i expected. 

look at the light peeking through at the top of the bamboo... pretty! BUT OMG. THE PEOPLE. LOOK AT THAT.. crazy.. why is everyone and their moms in the bamboo forest WHEN IM THERE?! jk.. but not jk. IN THE BAMBOO FOREST, I SAW A REALLY REALLY CUUUTE FAT BABY. SOOOO CUTE. the FATTEST BABY IVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. :P (not gonna post the creeper pic i took to protect the baby’s identity) 

after being packed like sardines in a bamboo ~grove~, i started to make my way back to kyoto station. i got a little lost there but i just followed the sound of the train tracks AND THEN I GOT TO KYOTO STATION. ^_^ i had to go back to my hostel to pick up my luggage since i was going to go to nagoya in 3 hours. 

i had lunch at kyoto station.. and I WENT BACK TO NAKAMURA TOICHI AND I GOT THE MATCHA BUCKWHEAT NOODLES COS I COULDNT STOP THINKING ABOUT IT THE WHOLE TIME AFTER I HAD IT THE FIRST TIME. i kinda regret NOT GETTING A MEAL SET BECAUSE I WANTED TO TRY THE DESSERT but it was okay. i ALREADY HAD ICE CREAM IN THE MORNING. 

sigh.. i miss this.. :( I WANT TO EAT IT RIGHT NOW!!!!! :( 

after my lunch, i shopped more around kyoto station and got some souvenirs for my family such as bookmarks, postcards, coasters etc. kyoto station is the BEST! it has everything and I NEED MORE TIME THERE. after shopping around, i started to wait for the bus to nagoya. 

sigh.. i know what youre thinking. IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE THAT I WENT TO TOKYO -> KYOTO -> NAGOYA and then AFTER NAGOYA I’M GOING TO OSAKA? thats like the OPPOSITE WAY. it would have made more sense if i went to nagoya before kyoto, but this is the way things turned out and IM NOT COMPLAINING. also. I DIDNT TAKE THE SHINKASEN to NAGOYA because the shinkasen is SO EXPENSIVE and i didnt get a JR pass because it wasnt worth it to me as i was going to fly out of osaka to get back to canada. therefore, the next affordable way was to bus. 

bussing to nagoya took around 2.5-3 hours. i used the metitsu bus company and it was pretty comfortable. i havent taken the greyhound in a while, but it was much more comfortable than the greyhound. i would say maybe comparable to the go bus because theres not that many people on it. i booked and reserved my seat before i had even gone to japan which was nice because it ensured that i had a seat. there was someone sitting beside me EVEN THOUGH there was like NO ONE on the bus. :(. i didnt mind because he didnt get in my way or anything, but i just felt bad for him cos my coffee beans STANK SO MUCH. lol. WHATEVER

by the time i got to nagoya it was almost 7pm. when i went past nagoya on the shinkasen, it looked very old with like no high rise buildings, but I WAS SO WRONG. WHEN I GOT OFF THE BUS AT NAGOYA STATION, IT WAS SO DEVELOPED. lol. THERE WAS A HUUUGEEE PRADA STORE RIGHT ACROSS FROM THE STATION. did not expect that. i met my family and friends at this mall called lachic in sakae which is the downtown district of nagoya. 

blessed that google maps was so good in nagoya and it told me which platform to board for the subway. thank god. ^_^. the subway was packed but not ALL that packed compared to tokyo even though i was riding it during a peak hour. ^_^ ^_^ nagoya already exceeded expectations once i got there. 

but LACHIC. damn, that was SUCH A NICE MALL. with FANCY STORES. on the ground level, there is a CDG store, D&G, and even CHROME HEARTS. none of which i could buy anything from. but it was nice just having it there. :3 after meeting up at the mall, we went to drop off stuff at the airbnb. i had no idea where our airbnb was, but the walk there was jokes. it was like the neighbourhood that a ghibli film would be. so i was pretending to walk a dog, like the short film that i watched at the museum. ^_^. 

after dropping off the stuff, freshening up and just chilling, we went to a restaurant to meet up with my cousin’s friend. the restaurant was SO LOCAL. i had no idea where we were BUT theres no english name, no english menu. had no idea what i was eating/drinking but it was good. 

#nagoyafood 

excuse the poor photography. but that on the grill is nagoya okinomiyaki aka “PUKE” cos its so watery and there is like more cabbage than other okonomiyaki. it tasted really good. the yakisoba was BOMB. the DRINKS WERE BOMB. #NAGOYAFOOD

as i said before, i was NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO NAGOYA. but damn PEOPLE ARE SLEEPING ON NAGOYA. it has everything that tokyo has to offer (in terms of shopping) and the food is cheaper and not at “tokyo prices.” so AFTER ABOUT 4 HOURS IN NAGOYA, i can say that nagoya exceeded what tokyo has to offer. 

after dinner, we just went back to the airbnb and got ready for the next day~

what i learned today: nagoya is sooo underrated. SOO UNDERRATED. it isnt as like BORING than what people may think. also, i NEED MORE TIME IN ARASHIYAMA NEXT TIME. take out time from tokyo and spend more in kyoto!

high point: arabica.. so gooood. i havent opened the beans yet cos i need to get them grinded, BUT WHEN I CAN GRIND THEM, ill be drinking coffee like water. 

low point: ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE BAMBOO FOREST. UGH. packed like sardines -_-