#typically i dont like hating on things because of the amount of time; work

[sweeneydino]

So, decided to watch the first bayverse movie to prepare myself for the gutpunch I'm boutta get from the 2012 season 4 finals and honestly... it's not bad

Only complaints is why is the exposure so high in these movies-

I can not not think of people in motion capture suits everytime I look cgi stuff . But that's just a me thing lol

Wait

Bro I was robbed...

It's honestly not as bad as I thought it'd be, it was actually pretty fun. Even with the amount of slow motion shots, but it's like 10 years old so idc.

Oh there is one thing I'm gonna say.

I do not like their faces in the movie... that's a given, but one thing I can't forgive is that stupid fucking shredder suit

He literally looks like one of those shit characters staring into a pool of water little me used to make in 1st grade at the back of my English notebook while listening to pain by three days grace.

What is this.

How does he even fight like that. I just... I can't take him seriously... he's not even scary-

Who thought this was scary? Intimidating?..

Don't answer that, I already know.

I had a whole rant about how much i hated his design but all I'll say is that there is not enough words for how I would describe the pure, visceral hatred I have for that fucking knife mech suit. If they just got rid of those knives, it would've been decent, he didn't need to rob hells kitchen for his first time dressing himself for school.

Anyway, I think I might redesign them. Just a teensy bit(and maybe a little inspired from the concept arts). I'll post it when I'm finished. I'm not touchin the knife man.

Lemme know if you like em when I do :>

[drdemonprince]

i was on NPR talking about Autism shit two weeks ago, and i have the book sales figures from that week and that national media appearance had.... absolutely zero relationship to sales. on the typical week these days, 1,400 to 1,500 copies of Unmasking Autism will sell. The week that I was on NPR there was a slight dip; only about 1,300 books were sold.

i have done a lot of press for my books. For Laziness Does Not Exist I did easily a 100 damn podcasts and radio shows and newspapers and excerpts in magazines. none of it corresponded to a noticeable bump in sales. the biggest "get" my publicist found for my latest book was the Glennon Doyle show, a booking she and her team celebrated and then spent months clamboring excitedly for... it, too, had no obvious relationship to sales.

Unmasking Autism became a bestseller because some other guy made a tiktok about it, and then a bunch of tiktokkers made videos about it too. all on their own. without any prodding from me, or any relationship to me. it was completely organic, passionate, and sincere, and rooted in the book's true merits and usefulness to other people, and that's why it inspired lots of sales. and continues to more than a year and a half later. all the press I did for Unmasking Autism prior to the release of that tiktok did relatively far less. NPR, Goop, the LA Times, Lit Hub, Jacobin, Huffpo, the New York Times, the Financial Times, MSNBC, Business Insider. Didn't matter. at least not much. so why do i bother?

publishers really ride your ass trying to make you give lots of interviews and show up for lots of events but it's all based on the worship of traditional media and magical thinking that it will somehow convert listeners into buyers. and that's just not how it works. the truth is 95% of books never sell more than 5,000 copies, and most people don't buy books or read them. i love reading but i dont think this is itself some terrible loss, as most books are padded-out commodities made for sale more than a work of true artistic passion or scholarly merit, and sometimes listening to a 90 minute interview with an author tells you the bulk of what you need to know.

it's freeing to know that the effort i put into getting my books out into the world have almost zero relationship to the books' success. marketing just does not work. it's a relief. unmasking autism did fabulously because it's actually both good and useful. laziness has had a long life span because it speaks to real problems in people's lives and gives them a message they are desperate to hear. but no amount of thirsty ass online shilling will make somebody realize that and it's maddening to try. you just gotta focus on doing good work, work that you enjoy making or need to make and that you feel good about, let things flop if theyre gonna flop, and keep on living your life.

which is all good news because i really do hate a lot of these fucking interviews. how can i stomach being on npr or in the atlantic or whatever these days given how complicit nearly all major media outlets are in justifying this genocide. like who fuckin cares about them, who wants their approval. who needs it. it's of no value

[egeos]

a brief look at the history of hulknussen on ao3

as I was writing up my hulknussen fanfic recommendations masterpost I realized that someone coming into the ship just now is probably missing a decently sized amount of lore on their "meta" history - that is to say, how fandom has treated hulknussen and how it has changed over the years. I'm making a post on it that so I can reference it in the aforementioned masterpost, but you can also just read this if you want to know more about hulknussen's position in f1 rpf fic on ao3. they're no lestappen, but they've had their moments

I'll try my best to boil down the key factors that influenced them, dynamics, characterizations, etc for the three - and soon four - "eras" I have determined for their ship.

the oldest fic currently in their tag dates back to 2015, which was about a year after kevin joined F1. there were a few people writing for this ship back then, and it didn't really gain traction until 2017 with the infamous "suck my balls mate/honey" incident. there was a small but steady stream of fics uploaded to ao3 over the following years. around late 2020/early 2021 was when they started getting put into the background of fics, as well as into compilation works a lot more, slowly but surely earning them the status of a pairing with bruce banner syndrome.

around this, I have determined three eras you can divide hulknussen fics into. this is based on when they were written and posted, not when the fic itself takes place. I can write something today that takes place in 2014 but it (read: characterizations, dynamics, plot devices, etc) would still be influenced by things that have happened since.

anything from before hungary 2017 kmag joins the grid in 2014, when nico is in his fourth season. they didn't really interact much, but had some interesting parallels in their career for these years. there really aren't a lot of fics from this era, which is a shame in my opinion. I know I technically can't write something for this era, but I really want to try to play around with the dynamics common for them at this time. both of them are younger (kevin 20-23, nico 25-28) with everything to prove. nico still has more of a heartthrob status, kevin is the young and impulsive new rookie. nico also doesn't hold the "beloved by no one, cheered on by everyone" status he has nowadays. he's just kinda there, doing nothing with a friendly smile and never bothering anyone (as opposed to the rest of the grid borderline trying to murder each other in their rivalries).

the last thing I think you can point out is that it was a lot of au's - and I dont mean canon divergence or what if's, but "hulknussen except one is an angel and the other is a demon" "firefighter", "showjumper", that sort of level of au. it is how fandom used to be. nowadays it's more focused on tropes and "canon" (in quotations because rpf) plays a bigger role than it used to.

suck my balls, honey, and all that it brought this part is pretty straightforward. they had their moment in hungary and it spawned a few hate fucking/sexual tension/enemies to lovers fics. there was for sure an uptick around 2017 and even into 2018, but what this moment did way more importantly was cement them as a pair with both history and a "canon" dynamic at all. think of it; hungary is the first time anyone really saw them interact. for a lot of people that was the number 1 thing connecting these two and was basically expected if they were tagged in a fic.

their portrayals boiled down to two, really: the horny one, and the less-horny one. the first is pretty self explanatory, we got two guys who really don't seem to like each other and we make them bang because it's hot. the latter might involve repressed feelings, "secretly together but putting on an act for others", soulmates and making up because of it - kind of, the typical enemies to lovers trope.

(fun fact I want to include; kevin said in 2019 that he never felt much of a grudge towards nico after hungary and held a lot of respect for him. he also said that nico was refusing to even just look at him, and simply determined that nico must have taken hungary very personally while he himself didnt care a lot. it's one of my favourite hulknussen tidbits that I think can really be played around with when writing fic set in this era/using this dynamic.)

it's also worth mentioning that this was when a/b/o as a whole was going mainstream in fandom spaces (and honestly even outside of them, but I wont dive into the implications of that here) which of course also reached F1/hulknussen. some fics fell into the trap of "uwu bottom" and "strong top" stereotypes as a result, usually with kevin as the omega and nico as the alpha. I'm mentioning it because I think that, like hungary 2017, it left its mark in their dynamic and how people cho(o)se to portray them even outside of a/b/o contexts. I will also be honest and say that it's not my personal preferred interpretation, but I acknowledge that it exists, and I won't even deny that maybe it's influenced my own portrayals in ways I haven't noticed.

up until 2019 most of the fics tagged as hulknussen still centered on them. then around 2020-2021 they started getting tagged as a background, side, etc pairing more and more, slowly taking over their tag. I think it was mainly because they had a (at first glance, anyway) simplistic and familiar dynamic with the archetype of enemies/rivals to lovers. it was easy to slot into the background of a fic, easy to use as a catalyst for the main pairing, that sort of thing.

that doesn't mean there were no hulknussen fics being written. I'm mentioning it because it's a development that has stuck around, and they are still often delegated to the sidelines in favour of younger and more popular ships. the fics that were written about them didn't all stick to the enemies to lovers archetype, however! fluff, making up and fics that simply ignored hungary and kept going like before were still being written.

making up (and making out?), haasbands, "my favourite dane", kevin's defence masterclasses, and probably so much more *you are here they make up sometime in 2022. both of them are older, they have matured. both of them are now married and both of them are fathers. they have survived a pandemic (together, kinda) as well as survived being out of the sport and returning. then they're announced as teammates for 2023. it is, of course, a decently huge deal in the wider F1 community. not everyone knows they made up, and media does what they do best, which is stir shit. they didn't manage to convince everyone that they wouldn't implode and take haas with them, but they proved themselves a decent duo in 2023.

it's 2024 when things really kick off. günther is fired from the team and replaced as team principal by ayao. gene decides to invest more capital into F1 over NASCAR, and somehow haas is the only team on the entire grid that didn't have super misleading wind tunnel analysis results (that's not entirely true; theirs were misleading, but theirs were telling them their car is worse than it actually is, whereas everyone else went into 2024 expecting to be better than they ended up being at the beginning of the season). so, overall, haas is in a good spot and on an upwards trajectory.

cue jeddah 2024. kevin racks up penalties like crazy because the fia is trying to be stricter and punish more harshly by giving out 10s instead of 5s penalties. which, credit where credit is due, it did what they wanted, which is ruin kevin's race, and ruining someone's race is a solid way of making sure they don't become a repeated offender (you would think so, anyway). kmag uses the opportunity to hold back the entire back of the field so the gap between him and nico is big enough to buy nico an entire pitstop. that is a crazy feat on so many levels. that takes slowing down without being overtaken. like, forcing the other race cars to slow down when they could easily go faster, in a race where the entire point is to go fast. he needed to speed off into the sunsent during the straights and slow down crazily fast in the corners, all while managing tyres. and the madlad did it and then gives interviews with a big fat smile, saying he "had to do [his] thing to protect nico". okay, we get it, youre married, get a room

the "enemies to lovers arc" and "haasbands" jokes go mainstream. nico calls kevin his favourite dane and describes their relationship as "[their] little romance". they watch the euros together and post pics of it with them smiling at each other like they are actually married. nico wants kevin to go to audi with him, kevin keeps playing the team game for nico even off-track, spending way too much time defending him and his actions. the haasbands as we know them have been birthed.

(before I go on a tangent any longer about this era, let's actually get to what fics from "then" are like. it's the current state of things, so I can't give conclusive statements, but I can make some deductions already.)

before the hard launch of the haasbands, around 2022 and 2023, their fics went into the direction of slow burns, making up, and (mutual) pining. 2024 shook things up again.

with the 2024 season still going, this is pretty much as close up to date as possible as we can get. the current dynamic that has been crystalizing is what I like calling feral dog kevin and lovestruck nico. it's very descriptive, so, you know, Im sure you can imagine what I mean. kevin's attempts at securing nico points also hasnt gone unnoticed by the mainstream community, and jokes about nico getting his first podium because kevin chose to play pinball with all the 18 other drivers are getting more frequent. there is also the upcoming "divorce", courtesy to both of them leaving haas at the end of the season and haas being the sole reason haasbands exists in the first place (both the moniker and the new dynamic).

I predict we'll be entering a fourth era soon, which is the post F1 era. while I don't like to think about it, it seems less and less likely that kevin will get the audi seat, and it is also the only seat left on the grid currently. nico will stay for some longer I do believe, but even his end is approaching. the number of fics being written will start dying off. I can't really say if a new dynamic will come up; I would think not, unless kevin decides to be unhinged and starts coming to races acting in borderline wag capacity to nico, or both of them move to indy or wec or something.

now, just for self indulgence's sake, the fourth era could also be kevin goes to audi, they turn into… audibands? stakebands? and Audi actually develops a great car and they get off the ground running and kevin can break that record of "most career starts without having lead a lap" while nico gets his first podium and breaks his undesirable record. we get an uptick in fics, the feral dog kevin and lovestruck nico dynamic evoles a bit further to be just a little bit deranged with an edge of codependence to it and then they retire and take their ship with them, if maybe a bit less abruptly than in the first "fourth era" I described.

or, who knows; maybe we don't get a fourth era. maybe their tag has reached the end of it's evolution. we'll just have to see.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if i warned interviewees/incoming potential employees at my job that it sucks here and also they wont earn any commission pay?

I work in an auto shop and the estimators' pay is a base flat rate plus commission based on how much the shop earns each week. If we dont earn enough in a week for them to earn commission, they still get the flat base pay but they're basically in debt to the company and will not earn commission until that bad week is made up for (so if profit was 50% of budget one week, if we hit 150% the next week that balances out and he hasn't earned any commission. To earn commission that second week we'd need to go over 150%. Multiple bad weeks in a row quickly add up. In theory if someone quits while in the hole they would owe money from their paychecks back to the company). We currently have one estimator and he earns a bit of commission most weeks, nothing crazy. In the past we'd had two for several months and they were both in the red nearly the entire time because (potential) commission earnings had to be split between them (based on the jobs assigned to them), and after going back down to one estimator it took a month and a half for him to dig out and earn commission again.

My manager thinks we need more help on the admin side of the shop again and is trying to hire a second estimator. I work the front desk and overhear them explain the commission in interviews, acting as if they'd earn any. Me, our current estimator, and a few of the techs all think we'd benefit more from hiring a dedicated production manager instead, because we (me, estimator and general manager) currently all juggle the typical production manager job duties, which results in those things often getting done poorly, slowly, or not at all. It seems the current bone being picked is we need to write more estimates to pull in more work, but i handle the schedule (very difficult & fickle without having someone wholely dedicated to managing production that i can discuss it with...) and i dont think a second estimator is fully necessary for the amount of business we're getting. If our estimator had a little more time on his hands (& got a little more practice/got a little faster, he's still relatively new) him and i could bring in a lot more customers.

In the past, corporate has told us its not possible to have a production manager, however plenty of other locations do have one (this is a very large company) and in fact all of our job training constantly refers to the production manager role, even recently updated job aids. It felt like half my training was "the production manager will do x so that you can use this to complete y". Its simply cheaper for corporate to have two estimators earning 0 commission rather than have one estimator earning commission and someone else on a production manager salary.

Im tempted to find a way to warn incoming estimators about how much it'd suck for them to work here so they dont actually hire anyone while we try again to convince corporate that we need a production manager instead, but we're not sure if our manager is fully against the idea of a production manager or if she just doesn't want to stir the pot with corporate (they're already not in love with her), and without our manager on our side, there's a 0% chance we'd ever get a production manager. I do like our manager besides this, and she's generally usually attentive to employee needs, etc. So i would hate to throw her under the bus or sabotage her in any way, but we simply don't see the logic here.

What are these acronyms?

[milo-webp]

Maybe Friends Aren't So Bad

FIRST FIC!! This was a request by @fefe-the-cat! I hope you like it :D

TW for: Canon typical violence, a good amount of swearing (cmon it's Dallas Winston)

773 words

Dallas's day was not going well. Hell, his whole life wasn't going well. He had woken up with a hang over, which was never enjoyable, but he could survive that. It wasn't until he found out Sylvia had cheated on him once again had things really turned to shit.

Dallas needed to pick a fight to release all the pent up emotion he felt. And he did end up finding some random soc to rile up; what he failed to realize was that this particular soc wasn't alone. In fact he had several freinds that Dallas had failed to notice. Friends who were much, much larger than Dallas.

So here Dallas was, limping his way to the Curtis house with blood dripping into one eye. God I hate it when blood gets in my eye Dallas thought as he roughly wiping his eye, just agrivating the wound further.

His plan was to just go in, get cleaned up, get out. No one should've been thereat the moment. Soda and Steve were both working at the DX. Ponyboy, Johnny, and Two-Bit were all at school. Darry should be at his roofing job. Life, however, had other plans. Or rather Darrel Curtis had other plans.

" Glory, Dal, what the hell happened to you?!"

Dallas flinched when he saw that Darry was in fact Not at work. Squeezing his eyes shut for a second to ease the pain from Darry's hollering bringing back that damn hangover headache. Dallas shouldered his way past Darry, trying to get to the bathoom where all the first aid supplies were.

"I'm fine Darry. Now shut it, will ya'? I've got a migraine." Darry wasn't having it though. Stepping infront of Dallas, Darry gripped Dally's shoulders trying to examine his injuries.

"You look like you got the shit beat outta you. Did you get jumped or something?" Dallas glared at his friend… wait…friend? God Dallas really was getting soft. When did he start thinking about the gang as his friends? He never thought about his old gang members back in New York as friends. Why is this any differant. He needed too change the perspective of the gang . They weren't friends. They were allies. Only al- Jesus fucking christ, could that cut stop bleeding?! Blood was dripping into his eye again. He hated when blood got in his eyes.

"-allas? Dallas!?" Dallas was shot out of his thoughts by Darry's worried voice. "Are you ok? I asked you if you needed help cleaning that cut up? it looks like it needs stitches…"

Right. Dallas needs to clean the cuts that littered his face. One of those cuts kept getting blood in his eye. He hated having blood gets in his eye. He wiped his eye again. "Jesus, Darry, I told ya'. Im Fine. I just don't keep any first aid shit at Buck's."

Darry's eyes scrunched up in worry. "Are you sure? Because it looks pretty bad… I've done stitches a few times. They may not be pretty but it'll get the job done."

Dallas gritted his teeth. Why couldn't Darry just let it go? It's not like he should care! Dallas Winston was a no good JD. A hood. He was a bad influince on Ponyboy. He never did anything that was good or useful. All he did was mess up.

In his emotion, Dallas hadn't realized that he was saying his thoughts outloud. But what he did notice was Darry's pained expression. Fuck. Darry wasn't supposed hear that.

"Dal…" Darry's voice was strained with worry. His eyes were soft. Softer than anyones eyes should look while looking at Dallas Winston.

Some emotion that he didn't recognize started to build up in Dallas. And of course Dallas turned that emotion into anger. Because anger is all Dallas knew how to feel.

"What the fuck is that look? Are you pittying me? Dont fucking pitty me Darrel. I'm not some little kid who cant handle himself. I don't need you to worry about me. And I don't— GOD DANMIT WHY DOES BLOOD KEEP DRIPPING IN MY EYE!" Dallas furiously wiped his eye, just worsening the cut that was causing him his strife.

In pain and in a shit emotional state, Dallas began to do something he hadn't done in years. Cry.

It was as the first sob hit that Dallas felt a pair of arms wrap around him. Dally started to cry even more. He hadn't had a hug in… he doesn't even know how long. He melted into his friends arms. Maybe Darry did care about him. Maybe having friends is a good thing. Maybe friends aren't so bad.

[thatneoncrisis]

20 questions for 20 writers!

tagged by @waitineedaname thxx

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

21 works, i feel like thats a healthy number

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

i have 439,385 words, a very large chunk of that is from We Have Always Lived in the Apartment

3. What fandoms do you write for?

right now its the locked tomb, used to be homestuck, i have some crossovers with the magnus archives and one with john dies at the end

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

We Have Always Lived in the Apartment -- TLT horror mystery modern au

Insert Jesus Allegory Here -- solkat focused continuation of karkats pesterquest route, i NEED my new fics to get more popular than this oh my god

Gehenna the First -- TLT houseswap au with harrow as god

the gap between a tragedy and comedy (in this life its just you and me) -- TLT coffee shop au.

What's Eating Gideon Nav?  -- TLT catholic boarding school horror au

5. Do you respond to comments?

not typically, theres some weird thing with my head where i kind of hate that it counts my comments in the total comment amount. i cant explain it i just dont like how it looks, plus just repeating variations of "thank you!!" feels hollow after a while. im more likely to answer direct questions about the story rather than general commentary i do love talking about my thought process and intentions

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ok so i cant actually tell you this because none of those fics are Done yet but all you need to know is that i consider all of my TLT fics tragedies to some extent. take that as you will. i dont even Like the word angst really it portends a level of melodrama id like to avoid

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'd say its a dead tie between A Brief Lesson In The Occult and Shit. Let’s Build A Fort. i can barely look at these anymore and if you read them and feel compelled to tell me you like them: dont. i can do better now

8. Do you get hate on fics?

never to my knowledge has anyone ever publicly disliked one of my fics. in fact sometimes i dream about someone posting it in their discord group chat and making fun of it because im so curious about what theyd say

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes i have. i do it almost exclusively as satire or character analysis as i find like, the physicality of sex to be inherently kind of goofy. liek the second you have to describe a dick or boobs with words the magic is gone it just becomes weird silly looking flesh. so i like focusing on weird and bad sex, unsatisfying or clumsy sex. sex that changes you in no significant way

10. Do you write crossovers?

yes i have. A Brief Disappearance and Statement of David Wong are both TMA/JDATE crossovers and i DID write a homestuck/TMA crossover but its not on my ao3 i guess? odd

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

no? does that happen?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i think once someone asked but i have no clue if it happened

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

@notedchampagne is my co producer in all things forever but ive basically written everything myself and they help polish it up

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

shiiiiiiite uh. jade/davepeta still means a lot to me. i think there are a lot of really engaging ships in TLT but i always kind of default to griddlehark i just kind of understand them the best

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

eventually SAM and i would like to circle back to our fanventure Therapystuck but we both got really busy with school, work and a general lull in the HS fandom. also maybe someday ill go back to Insert Jesus Allegory Here i liked the direction of the story i just have to get myself back in that headspace. being into homestuck Does something to you, like psychologically

16. What are your writing strengths?

after asking some friends theyve told me im good at tone, prose, funny metaphors, and dialogue but a caveat for the last thing as "I have yet to see how your Own guys talk and how you'd handle distinct voices from scratch so I'm only giving you about 80%"

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i hate like. writing Around the important bits of a scene. i love the physicality of characters and what it reveals about them, along with pieces of the scene the narration deems important or interesting enough to mention to the audience. but im always worried im jsut fucking yapping. also i hate like, political scenes theres a rhythm to them that i dont quite understand. people sitting around using specific language that Feels important in a way that doesnt make it clear im bullshitting like 99% of what theyre talking about

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

AHAH. GOD. i actually looked this up the other day because theres an original story i want to write where i want to make it clear theyre basically speaking french the whole time, even though its written in english. i only speak english (i took some french in hs, its left me though i want to pick it up again) so i wouldnt know anything about how it reads to polyglots but i guess theres really only so much you can do outside of literally learning a new language just to write a story for free. ive seen a whole host of tips so i gues sit just matters how you employ them

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Homestuck. my only regret is that i wasnt a better writer

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

FUCK christ uuuuh. favorite right Now would be The Apartment but EVENTUALLY id like it to be Gehenna the First because its the hardest to write and i need it to pay off. if you havent read it uhhh. hi. hello. you should do that. i think its really cool and fun and junk

CHRIST who to tag i dont follow big writers uuuh @tranquilitybasehotelcasino and @accidentallyadorable sure have fun

[lord-of-the-bundle-of-sticks]

me sin posting anyway

sins when sicky wicky going in whatever order idk im eepy

Wrath: somehow even more edgier.. rots in his bed most of the time. he doesnt even bother to do anything productive because he finds no point in doing so

he gets mad when people try to make him get out of bed or invade his personal space. he also hates certain medicines and prefers to eat specific foods that he wouldn't eat otherwise ("they're sick foods, why would i eat them if i'm not sick?")

he's not very skilled at taking care of sick people. he just listens to what they want and ask for, and he doesnt try and bug them unless he truly feels like he needs to (ex. if someone is violently coughing their lungs out or throwing up)

Gluttony: he's reduced to a baby. thats it thats the tweet /j

he tries to stay in bed for the most part, but he does also do his regular work out routines and makes his own food. he typically just makes a stew or a salad for himself and only drinks warm things when he's sick. he's the type of guy that you kind of have to force into bed instead of running around and doing stuff

when it comes to taking care of others he coddles them a ton 😭. he makes their food, makes sure they're okay, and stays close so they don't have to go very far to ask for something. he'll encourage them to do some workouts with him but he respects it if they dont want to

Pride (guys pretend its yellow plz): he's dramatic asf but we love him. he complains a lot about his sickness and makes it known that he isn't happy about it in the slightest. unlike wrath he enjoys getting all the extra attention especially if they make him feel superior even while sick

when it comes to taking care of people it's kind of like tough love. he really only takes care of people he truly cares about and even after that it's followed with a "you should be glad i spent time out of my day to take care of you!" but he does take the time to actually make sure you're okay. he feeds you the medicine himself and probably tries to make you feel fancy, even if you're all stuffy and snotty

Envy: oh wow okay

envy's already kind of bad at taking care of himself, so when he's sick it's pretty bad. he has to practically drag himself out of bed to make himself food or to just use the bathroom, and he either forgets to take medication or takes an awkward amount of it. it's safe to say that a caregiver would benefit him, but he hates being a burden to anyone, and he doesn't like feeling vulnerable either

he worries a lot when it comes to taking care of another person while they're sick. he tries not to come off as pushy or annoying as he tries to make them feel better, but sometimes that doesn't work. he's not a great cook but he does follow some recipes for the person so they can at least eat some good food

Greed: ew. anyway

i think greed would probably hate being sick since he feels like nobody actually takes him seriously, which ticks him off because he likes to have power, and a lot of people don't take him seriously in the first place. he doesn't like to come off as weak either

however if he was taking care of someone else i feel like he'd be so overly nice it's uncomfortable. it feels more like a fake kindness than anything, and of course he'd find a way to fuck around with you any chance he could get.

Sloth: sloth is pretty prone to falling sick. he's very similar to envy, not really taking care of himself properly, but he does a lot of sleeping. i think he'd probably end up sleeping more than he already does while hes sick.

he's always kind of in a daze when he's sick. he's honestly in a daze in general but it seems like whenever he's awake he's dissociated or just delirious

he's pretty bad at taking care of people however he does have good intentions. he makes the bed as comfy as he can, but he is pretty lazy so he's probably not the best person to be taking care of someone. he does get the person whatever they want if they ask for it though.

Lust: he tends to be kind of dramatic too, but not as dramatic as pride. he loves self care and making sure that he's healthy, so he reminds himself to take medication and even logs when he takes it so he can measure how much time should pass before he takes another. he likes eating oatmeal and other soups for the most part, and he's likely drinking broth or some hot chocolate.

when he takes care of people he pampers them with everything they could possibly need. he logs everything in a notebook so he knows when the person needs to take more medication, and he's there for comfort and company. he feels pretty alone when he's sick, so he wants to make sure that the person feels happy despite not being in the best shape.

@stanleyvampire14 come get ur food

[kissabledyke]

when i read smut i love when the girl with a dick is a tgirl who loves herself, sometimes i like it when there is some doubt and introspection and the story ends with her being happy.

but sometimes i also love the subversion when someone is really evil and is/isn't punished by the end, like when a futa impregnates a bunch of people and then shows up to do it again a year later.

i love smut narratives like that, which is why i read smut fics instead of watching porn, porn just doesnt go at a pace i can comprehend, or it goes too slow.

also im asexual and amab but i just... dont feel gender? i hate my body hair but it doesnt cause me any dysphoria, i hate my face-hair and sometimes i wish my penis could just stop existing. but at the same time i dont want to be a girl, i just love it when girls are girls.

i just want to renounce all of these manhood things, i hate it when my dad or uncle says something about my body is 'manly', when i try to articulate what i want they get confused because i practically want nothing, i dont want to twirl skirts (though id like to try) or do makeup or be referred to in any hyper-feminine manner.

also i think im masturbating wrong? im constantly hurting my penis to the point of bleeding, am i supposed to use lube? i never learned how to use lube and i dont know how to learn now tho i am very (privately) proud of my ability to do it in the work bathroom, its satisfying to know that im being paid for time i spend jorking it to gay smut

ok this is kind of a lot. i'm going to respond to all of this as kindly as i can but you should know that this is like. A Lot to send anonymously to a stranger. like i know that i reblogged this post but this is a bit beyond the scope of the implied social contract

anyway, again, responding to all of this point-by-point in the best of faith:

yessss i love gender affirmation and a happy ending. i listen to audio porn a lot and my favorite genre is "mushy romance (and sex 😳) for trans woman listeners"

please don't use the word futa around me, and also i would caution you against using it in general. it's a gross derogatory term born from particularly dehumanizing pornographic caricatures of trans women. that said though i do like an evil woman. that particular scenario is darker than i'm generally into but i see the appeal

i totally agree, your typical mass market video porn is intensely uninteresting. yawn

i don't mean to speak over you but "i hate my face-hair and sometimes i wish my penis could just stop existing" sounds a LOT like dysphoria to me. "binary trans woman" is not the only other option you have available to you, and in fact i would argue that "binary trans woman" is an oxymoron. enjoy women (god knows i do) and explore who you are and who you could be. i too had to suffer through years and years of being reassured that i'm so manly and tough and boyish but as much as that sucks you can't let that stop you from being the person you wanna be. also spinning in a skirt is absolutely worth giving a shot at least once, go for it

yes you are masturbating extremely wrong, please please please stop doing whatever it is you're doing. go to the grocery store and buy some ky jelly or something and when you get home squeeze a generous amount on your favorite hand before trying again. for the love of god just do anything other than your current technique

lmao nice #quietquitting

[iindigoeyed]

Sorry to complain on main but

i had (have) 3 fucking longfics planned and one of them is actively being written and it's so nauseating because i didn't think to write an outline from the beginning and just wrote the first few chapters the same way i write my shorter stuff (aka: Whatever The Hell Happens, Happens with very little planning) and now i'm suffering and wayy in over my head and honestly considering dropping the whole thing because other people have taken the same concept and done it better for a different ship and it's a genre i'm not typically versed in writing and every time i think of ways to fix it i just make it worse and more convoluted and now i'm just discouraged from working on it and feel like i've wasted 4 months of my fucking life. I swear i'm never doing this again but the other two projects are ones i'm very excited for and yet, i hate hate hate having to plan so much and figure out the minute details like i just want to give up. i open my google docs (all 7 of them) and look at the gargantuan amount that i have to complete before i can even remotely POST chapter 1 and it makes me want to puke. I dont know how you people do this

[vanoefucks]

el: 6, 10, 12, 16, 30, 39 / fennel: 3, 7, 11, 15, 17, 24 / 19 for both of them and also nalfein pls gimme the crossover lore

omg ok this is gonna be a lot >:)

EL:

6. What weather does your PC prefer? Why?

Overcast/stormy days were a fave before the game because of the gloomy atmophsere they gave & it made it easier to fall into the shadows while tracking his bounties. Post game they're a fave because on the stormiest of days he's able to be outside with Astarion with some caution.

10. How does your PC fidget?

He will forever be fiddeling with his weapons they are rarely ever in their straps if they've stopped for a break.He runs his fingers over the edge of his blades/spins his arrows around before the others tell him to put them away. Just likes to keep a hand on a weapon at all times.

12. If your PC had to set up a date, what would they plan for it?

He is sooo inexperienced with dating, hasn't had many people he could say he's 'dated'. Would not have much of a clue when it comes to typical dating rules/ideas so would probably just try to spend doing something they both enjoy, or taking a walk through a quiet part of town before going home for a nicer dinner than normal. any time spent together is considered a date to him he is big on quality time.

16. What scents do you associate with your PC? 

He would always be smelling of dirt/various plants that he's been tending to for his poisons which luckily to most would just have them think he's a keen gardener. through the game though blood sticks to his clothes, the materials he wears dont make for the easiest to clean and back in the city he got his work done without coming into contact with blood usually.

30. How does your PC flirt? 

badly no but he doesn't have the best charisma and any flirting he's done in the past relied more on looks than his words but again he's not too practiced or interested in flirting and was sort of stumbling through the affections of Astarion & Halsin. his approach is to just keep things going if someone comes onto him.

39. What would your PC put on their pizza? 

he is a plain guy he only vibes with a margarita like me

FENNEL:

3. How would your PC describe themselves?

I dont think he would know how to really. Not past the physical traits. probably unlucky if anything.

7. So if your PC had a car what kind of car would it be

after failing his test a few too many times he would get some random second hand that he doesnt totally hate the look of. preferable a grey one but he would not be a massive car person.

11. How does your PC show affection?

words! when it comes to platonic affection and lots and lots of touch with a partner. He ends the game pretty much attatched to gale at the hip. hes just tall enough to rest his chin on gales shoulders if he hugs him from behind & he loves sitting close enough for their legs to touch around the fire.

15. How does your PC feel about marriage? Weddings?

the moment gale said ily and showed him waterdeep Fennel was writing his vowes in his head. he finds two matching bands and keeps them in his pocket for the rest of the game. he worries about his past all through act 1 & 2 and once he finds out who he was and has the support of the others it gives him the confidence to put it behind him and he knows that he wants a meaningful future with gale, even with the small amount of time theyve spent together.

17. What are your PCs favorite fruits?

Blueberries. he'll gather a whole basket and eat them in one evening.

24. If your PC found a book that detailed their whole life, from birth to whatever death they’ll have, would they read it and why? 

I think he would hate read his durge days. remince over the span of the game skipping him killing alfira and stop the moment the book catches up with the present.

19: What is your PC’s Pokemon Gym Leader type and Signature Pokemon?

El would lead a poison type gym & his signature would be a Scolipede

Fennel would lead a pyschic type gym & he would have a Gallade

Nalfein would predictibly lead a dark type gym & his signature would be absol

[jaylleoo14]

- 🌷🌷🌷 -

DNI

❌Do not mix my content with reality. If you cannot tell between fiction and reality then I ask of you to simply not interact at all

❌ I understand if you are disturbed or bothered by dark content, but I ask you to not bash at me. Simply not interact at all, I create sfw and lighter work for those who do not enjoy such content

❌ I will not allow any negativity on here, so have some basic manners will you?

❌ No incest/bots/homophobia/transphobia/bigots (The amounts of times i've been so enraged due to the disrespect and discrimination!) General hate/ Pedophilia

❌ Blank blogs. If you dont want me to interpret you as a bot please at least have some pfp and picture or bio on your page. SOMETHING to lmk ur not a bot because if not then I will block you!

❌ I ask of you to please not trauma dump when I do not know you

To Note

❗I would like to make my blog a safe space for everyone, please dont be shy to share your little rambles, dark or wholesome I'm willing to read it!

❗ I wont be writing/drawing anything NSFW (smut) bc im a minor, so it makes me feel a little iffy knowing that. Though I am fine with making dirty/sexual jokes for the fun of it. At most it'll only either be heavily/lightly suggestive or/and implied if I ever were to write/draw anything in that area or were to include it. (I have my thirst moments too after all)

❗I really like horror, so dont be surprised if I expand to gore or the general field of horror. Sometimes i like to focus on the horror aspect more, so [said character] may or may not be an automatic yandere for that purpose

❗ I love yanderes!!! I think they are personally fun to write about and think about. But of course I love characters who aren't in the yandere themes as well (such as Miyamura or Genya)^^

❗My Blog is Multifandom. Dont expect me to only post content for only one fandom. Though asks are open and free for you to ramble!

❗ I'm a little shy in all honesty but please dont be shy to say hi<3 I'll start warming up to you if we interact often and i'm pretty friendly!

❗If you want to be mutuals please actually interact with me first before asking.

❗I am alright with being tagged in posts<3

❗ I am open to suggestions, chit chat, or your little rambles! It might help me wrack up another idea to write or draw about ^^

❗Please depict the characters as 18+ please because I usually like to write in settings where you'd be of age to attend or do such things (such as working in a specific profession or going to raves) unless stated or interpreted as otherwise.

❗I do not condone any toxic or your typical yandere traits in real life, along with a lot of immoral and dark themes. I know what im doing, I simply enjoy these themes in fiction. Do not base me as a bad person in real life because of that

❗I wish to Indulge in you to put it quite simply<3

Request Rules

✔️ As long as you can provide me a scenario/situation/idea/plot of a character I can make do with it!

✔️ Preferably limit to 5 people when asking at most!

✔️I have the right to refuse a request if I seem uncomfy/iffy/or unfamiliar with what's being requested

✔️ It would be great if you were to be specific with what you would like to request, in that way I can fit it to what you desire! I'm willing to indulge in you <3 Though its fine if you were to make it broad or general

✔️Although being neurodivergent myself I would like to ask you not to be too heavy on such specific topics when requesting.

✔️ Theres no specific way to give an ask, so just go for whatevers on your mind! <3

With that, I think I added all that I could think of. So please do enjoy your stay, that is if you decide to🌷

~Sincerly, Jay/Jello

Due to be edited anytime if needed

[brad-bakshi-loves-bugs]

hey there!! as someone who loves writing (but never posts) but hates reading OOC fics, i need your advice, if you're willing!

how do you find that pocket of in-character, while still fitting the storyline?

sorry if this sounds delirious and jumbled. I really admire your writing and wafwaf :)

okay, this is going to sound absolutely ridiculous and I have NEVER told anyone this before EVER, and I have no idea if this is something other people do or if im just a fucked up human being, but here me out:

so basically. I roleplay with myself. like, I spend a lot of time alone (which is fine im just a Huge Introvert) and I get bored easily, so when I was a lot younger I would just pretend to be my favorite characters from media and then when I was alone id talk and act like them and pretend to talk to the other characters in their universe. it helped me flesh out their backstories and behaviors, and with the added bonus that it gave my young ADHD brain something to do that wasn't destructive in any way. so like. it's kind of like larping, because im somewhat acting out what im roleplaying, but im not dressing up and it's just me, alone, pacing around my house. in hindsight it IS kind of pathetic and maybe I should tell my therapist about it, but if there's one thing you should know about me it's that I do NOT like being me and so I pretend to be other people as an escape.

well. in doing so, naturally, im going to get better at acting out the mannerisms of each character. and by that point, if you can act it out, then you can write it out. im very much a visual learner, so being able to picture the exact gestures and expressions each character would make while they talk etc helps SO much with writing! and sometimes I even take notes about specific mannerisms I notice while im watching the show (like brad frequently interrupting people, david's voice cracking when he's upset, etc), so that I can reference them while im writing to make sure I stay in character. I also watch a lot of youtube compilations from the show, so even if im not going back and rewatching the whole series, im still exposed to their distinct behaviors and speaking methods. it REALLY helps to just pick one or two characters at a time and study them exclusively, because you tend to notice a lot more about a specific character if your entire focus is on them.

now, could I write ian, or rachel, or poppy well? probably not, because I dont pay attention to their mannerisms when they're on screen since theyre not characters im personally invested in. but when david and especially brad are on screen, you can bet your ass im studying every tiny detail and change in their expression and tone, so that I can recreate that in my writing as necessary. my goal is that people will be able to recognize each character I write with exclusively dialogue and zero names mentioned. like, let me give an example:

"Hey man, did you get that report I sent you earlier?"

"Wh- uh, what report? I didn't get a report. Are you sure you-"

"Yes, I'm sure I sent it."

"Oh. Well then I'll, um, I'll check my email again. Are you sure you sent it to my work email?"

"Well I didn't send it to dirtydave3377@hotmail.com, if that's what you're asking."

"Oh, okay. I'll, uh- I'll get back to you on that report then I guess."

"Thanks."

see? now obviously the email kind of gave away one of the speakers, but hopefully it was more apparent as the dialogue progressed that the first speaker was brad and the responder was david. because david stutters a lot and uses a completely unnecessary amount of filler words when he talks, so he's pretty easy to write! and brad (typically) doesn't talk excessively, so it's common for him to give short responses only a few words in length. I basically write brad like he's perpetually fed up with everyone around him, because that seems most in character to me based on what I see in the show! lots of eye rolling, groaning, and frowning.

my goal in writing is for people to be able to visualize the characters saying what I write for them as if it's quoted directly from the show. now, im not going to claim to always succeed at that, but being able to hyperfixate on these characters helps a lot! so does reading other in-character fanfics, because it's sometimes tough to convert tv show acting into writing. luckily, at least in most fandoms, other people have already done it for you!

whenever im writing, especially when it comes to dialogue, im always picturing the characters in my head. I'm seeing the way their expressions shift, the way their hands gesticulate, the path they walk when theyre moving. im hearing them say the dialogue im writing in their voices, which probably makes me sound absolutely insane but im like 90% sure it's just my ADHD so dont worry! being able to see and hear the characters helps SO much, and I wouldn't write half as well without that skill.

im sorry this turned into such a long ramble! everyone has their own methods of figuring out characters, but roleplaying with myself, visualizing the characters, and studying the show helps me immeasurably.

as an aside, im always happy to beta stuff and check to see if it sounds in-character, and offer pointers/edits for anything that sounds too ooc! I've totally been there before, and obviously im not perfect, but I enjoy helping where I can and at this point ill do pretty much anything to help get more mq fics out in the world LOL

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

A moment of silence for the golden deer girls...

jk jk! Personally I don't really hate any characters (even Edelgard, but I DO hate her stans LOL )

so to sort of reframe it.. As a writer (and in your personal opinion) how would you improve Bernadetta and Marianne as characters?

And how did Hopes do better in regards to Bernadetta?

NGL I was pretty surprised when I found out how popular they were. Though I can see them working for the JP audience moreso than the Western audience.

Like I can see why some may not like Bernadetta and Marianne when they both have passive personalities , can be extremely pessimistic, and are so wrapped up in their own anxiety and trauma to the point they don't have the capacity to deal with everything else that's going on (That and the writers 100% treat Bernadetta as a joke). Whatever the reasons are it's valid, sometimes characters just dont work for someone!

With Marianne she improves if she survives to post time skip.

With Bernadetta it kinda does and doesn't? though I think she improves in her supports with Raphael and is much more tolerable (in general) in her supports with Leonie.

This is super old and I forgot to finish replying to it but! Look! I'm replying to it now!

Yeah see when it comes to EdeIgard I actually hated her but like... not with the same vitriol I do now because of the stans. I already found the writing for her to be bad (must I once again mention for the unknown amount of times: Ashnard lol), but then the way the stans who go far beyond "I like this character" shove what you already didn't like down your throat? Yiker pikers on a stick. It's one of those things where I didn't like her, but then the fans just made it so much worse. :/

I'm definitely not a fan of the GD girls lol. I mean like I probably said in the last ask response, I don't hate Lysithea or Hilda, but I don't have a strong attachment to them. Really it's GD in general I'm not that fond of, because the only characters I care about from that house nowadays are Lorenz and Claude, with a side of Ignatz lol. That is, I'm not big on Ignatz but I do like him and he'll always have a special little place in my heart for being my very first recruit in my very first playthrough.

For Bernadetta, I posted about her in response to this ask here.

With Marianne, it's not so much that I like, actively despise her. I don't like that she's just... extremely aggravating. She does get better post timeskip for sure, but pre-skip is just awful for me.

I get having anxiety and being afraid and all that, but she takes it too far. Her insistence that "something bad will happen" is used so much that it begins to feel like a poor excuse. On the writers' part, this is irritating because they could've written a character who had anxiety and just... had anxiety. Instead they gave her the whole backstory of thinking she's cursed. I feel that she would be more relatable if she was just a normal person with anxiety.

Because of the supposed "curse", she behaves rudely to people and cuts them off to "yell" at them (not literally yell, but I think you get what I mean?). People seem to give her a pass for usually saying "I'm sorry" before leaving, but it's so abrupt and someone will just be trying to talk to her and/or be nice to her, but she makes them feel bad for talking to her and trying to be nice.

I don't know that it was meant to be intentional on the writers' part, but it comes across as disgustingly manipulative, because that's what people do irl who are trying to garner sympathy. They play the woe is me part and apologize and all that, but it leaves their conversation partner feelings badly toward themselves for doing nothing wrong.

Typically conversations with Marianne are one-sidedly complimenting her and being super nice to her with nothing in return. She makes them feel bad about talking to her, then they compliment her and are still all nice to her. It rubs me the wrong way.

The thing about Houses' supports is that even if you get to the timeskip, if you have C and/or B conversations left, the characters' personalities will still be their pre-skip personalities. Even if she's grown in her timeskip personality, I still end up having to get through supports of her pre-skip personality during the second half of the game. It makes feeling better about her growth a lot more difficult.

And like I said, I don't straight up hate her... but her attitude in the first half of the game is definitely something I wouldn't be able to put up with if I knew her irl. It also gets to the point of being so over exaggerated that I don't feel sorry for her at all anymore. At first you're like oh poor girl, but then it happens so often and with so many characters that it just gets annoying and irritating. It's a boy who cried wolf situation.

I do think she was handled better than Bernadetta in the sense that she was definitely not played for laughs, but I think that's also because there's a huge gap in understanding between the mental illnesses they have. Anxiety is much more commonly understood nowadays, whereas agoraphobia isn't taken seriously and is usually written off as lazy people who just don't want to bother going out. Since it's also become a trope, whereas anxiety is seen irl as a more serious mental illness that is almost always coupled with depression (which makes it even more extreme), it's used as lol look I know that trope, rather than actually diving into what makes people behave like that.

Marianne has some similar problems that make me not like her as Bernadetta, but they're not entirely as bad, she does get much better development, and her situation isn't meant to be funny. I don't mind her being passive and pessimistic - I mean hell I'm super pessimistic irl, thanks society! - but it's the way she treats the people around her and uses the woe is me excuse every single time.

She doesn't want to feel responsible for something bad happening, so she instead puts those bad feelings onto everyone else so they instead feel poorly and she gets to feel better knowing "nothing bad happened". It's like, oh wow, now I feel so much better since I don't have to feel responsible if they die, even though now they're upset because they think they did something wrong when they didn't. It's extremely selfish and while sometimes being selfish isn't a bad thing, imo it kinda is when someone else gets hurt for the sake of oneself feeling better about the situation.

I agree that some characters aren't for everyone! While you don't have to hate the characters to not like them, there can be some that irk you and some you just aren't interested in (I mean take Raphael for instance. I don't care for him either way. He's a sweet guy and I wouldn't want him to die! I just don't have an interest in that type of personality for a character, and also because it's so immensely tropey with little else to him that I'm just very eh about him).

So yeah, Marianne is more along the lines of I can't stand her pre-skip but I can definitely tolerate and appreciate her post-skip. The supports just make it a lot more shaky because like I said, the way they work in Houses just makes the part of her I didn't like come right back instead of me getting to see just the development.

[glowstone23b]

UAGSHDHFK ITS SO FUNNY U SHOULD MENTION TOOTHLESS FROM HTTYD BECAUSE WHEN I WAS DESIGNING A CONCEPT FOR SAGE’S WINGS (which im still in the process of making) HE WAS MY FIRST REFERENCE :’’’) I LOVE NIGHT FURIES

but also to answer some of those previous elytra questions because they have been on my mind . i’ll sort of just be quoting them audvdhfj ive been thinking about them all day

“What if the elytra (after having been fully fused, I guess, but early users apply too) runs out of durability?”

— okay so pre-fusing the elytra is sort of. brittle. not fully but like regular durability you get in normal minecraft; it wears down after a while and this is because of a couple factors

1.) still adjusting to the host, hasn’t gotten the proper intake of blood and nutrients in its wings to fully sustain itself for the while yet so it’s trying to run off what it currently has (which tends to be very little resulting in them damaging over time if not fixed)

2.) it doesn’t wear down post fusion because the mutations and genes mixing in with the host lets it sort of stabilize by itself and become a part of the host entirely; once the “magical” properties of it are slowly simmering and is replaced with blood, skin, bacteria, etc (on that note the tendrils inside the host’s shoulder blades etc also sort of melt and become new veins/paths for blood circulation to take) (dont ask me how that works uhhh magic and minecraft stuff idk)

“Are the wings something you yourself can feel once they’ve fused with you, or is it more like… a neurological thing, where the elytra just know what you’re thinking?”

— OKAY when the tendrils slip in you’ll feel some generous amount of discomfort but pulling them out hurts more than letting them sink in

— new elytra users need a small bit of time to adjust to the wings and get a grasp on how they feel. its sort of different for everyone but at first it feels like a very strange version of pins and needles- you can move the wings around but it feels weird.

— although yeah the parasitic-ish parts of the elytra kind of do. connect with your brain (DIY lobotomy /j) in order to both A.) get the brain to move the wings around and B.) to do all the increased reaction time and instincts shabang (these stay permanently after fusion)

“Could you feel them as an extension to your body? If they get hurt, would you be able to feel it as if it were your arm or something, or would it be numb?”

- new elytra users get a numb sort of sensation when the elytra gets damaged via an arrow or something

- older (fused) elytra users get the similar sensation to the webbing of your fingers being sliced or punctured (owie)

- also at first they do feel like weird body extensions before eventually adjusting and them becoming literal body parts aisnfwidhfjfk

“If you run out of durability on fused elytras, is that something you could ever fix?”

— yes actually!! healing potions + usually phantom membrane is an efficient way of patching up deep wounds— depending on the type of wing it might just require a lot of healing potions and bandages, but eh its different for every user

— although if a massive chunk of those wings is like torn off then oooh. ouchie thats like having ur arm torn off. yeah that probably wont heal

^ — however . you can get fixes where they attach like a leather-like wing and hollow light silver(?) rods onto where the bones end to make a makeshift wing repair (leather is typically dyeable and able to be decorated)

bonita drawing ik . but you get the idea !!!!

“Would you be able to get a new pair if you hadn’t been fused yet?”

— YEAH

— if you get the new pair from another person who used it previously the process of the wings shifting to suit you better will take a while longer and vice versa

“Would you have to try to cut off your old elytra to replace it if you *were* fused?”

— yes

— not a pleasant experience but if you hate ur wings so bad then yes you could probably slice them off (i wonder what you would do with them afterwards?? Whats to do with sliced human-sized wings? … wall decoration?? Could you cook and eat them maybe?)

“could you potentially *pick* how your elytra form to look on you?”

— kkkkkkind of? the elytra by default looks like a weird mix of dragon and beetle wings all in one. good flight but also not infinitely durable like mentioned

— the shape of the wings, however, changes to fit the user from what the elytra can gather from their brain

(for example, Sage’s wings are based off night furies and peregrine falcons — fast speedy creatures due to Sage’s own history of enjoying fast speeds/being thrown or spun around and also from the lack of any fear of heights/falling)

(in fact actually enjoying those things) (yk how some kids ask to be thrown into lakes because they enjoy the sensation. yeah thats her)

“Like, if you tried to repair your elytra using a combination of some standard repair materials (phantom membranes, occasionally scales) as well as some other thing (like parrot feathers, for instance), could you possibly get the elytra to take on a form you’d prefer?”

— this is sort of tricky to answer because like. the elytra chooses what form of wings suits you best.

— mutations, though? Like having the elytra change from the dragon-beetle-ish look to having feathers and bright colours? That’s still achievable!! Theres even the possibility to mix and match different biological materials from the desired creatures however if you add in too many the elytra might like. kill you by accident or something (im talking more than like 5 or 7) (usually people opt to have only one or two main repair materials) (3 is teetering on the edge slightly i imagine because of like. neurological effects with all the mutations both physically behaviourally and mentally etc etc)

this also kind of raises the question of “how do you get bug wings” and i’ll be honest w u i have no idea. I imagine there’d be *some* strange way to achieve it? go ham many methods for elytra repairing

( mini rant of sage vv)

(Her way of flying is very similar to toothless in the first two movies. shes sleek and elegant in that cat-like fashion but she also does dive bombs and spins and rolls and is overall extremely confident, nigh cocky with how she flies. a lot of control too!! ,,,, most of the time has definitely crash landed several times) (not to mention speed,,,,, in certain situations when she picks up enough velocity you can hear a whistle coming from the air being sliced by her wings . no idea how to explain but you get the idea)

ALSO THE PHANON TAG IS ALR !! she/her pronouns for me but idrc if you use they/them ajdbfjk

Apologies for the late response, I wanted to make some quick doodles for this at the least!!! It's so fascinating to me! A sidenote before I forget-- what do you think about rocket-propelled elytra flight? Would that be possible at all, or do we pretend canon isn't there for it? It's very silly to think of, but I don't think it'd be very safe, lol.

Here's a rough gif of how I think it might work! (emphasis on might). The 'elytra' (used to refer to the parasite in this sense) feels like a bug to me... like a palm-sized ladybug, sort of. Just the right size to fit on the small of your back pretty easily. Once you set it there, it'll like... pinch/hurt a bit as it sets in its initial veins & whatnot to connect to you, but it just chills there otherwise. I feel like for pre-fused elytras, trying to take one off would feel kinda like a tick? Gross, but hey

I also use "elytra" in the literal sense-- the hard, chitinous sheaths that cover bug wings-- here, so I could draw it in my head. I think that wouldn't be very comfortable to sit back on, to be honest, if you were in a high-backed chair or something. Anyways, like bug wings they'd unfold and the blood that goes through them would fill them up to full size like you said! It'd likely happen in a matter of seconds for long-time users, but take up to a couple minutes for first-timers.

I've also got a couple post-fusion drawings here, under the cut bc it's kinda veiny and a little gross, so if you're averted to that thing, look away!

Again, bonita drawing, but just to get it out of my head. The main "body" of the elytra would start to stretch down your back to get further up along your spine, where all the good veins are! Eventually, the body of it would be more vestigial than anything, because it no longer needs it to look for a host (do you think elytras in end cities would be able to wander freely before fusing to someone? Kinda funny to think of someone just getting like. hit in the face by a stray elytra buzzing around).

I do have this as bug in my head, because my brain loves making sense of things, so it's struggling to figure out how other wing types would work. I know it's magical, so whatever goes, but hmm... maybe the customization just comes after fusing, when the elytra doesn't need to expend the extra energy on needing to find a new host, and can instead divert it to making different, sturdier wings...?

I like the makeshift wing repair with lightweight metals or leather and whatnot, it'd be neat to explore that! Just like toothless :). Color & style customization, too! Do you think anybody gets wing jewelry or piercings just to show off? Like irl vultures with wing tags?

"(i wonder what you would do with them afterwards?? Whats to do with sliced human-sized wings? … wall decoration?? Could you cook and eat them maybe?)" -- I mean, if we're in a world with human-sized wings, there's most likely a market for them! I wouldn't be surprised if long-term elytra users were hunted for sport if they had a particularly unique wing type... Wall decoration, for sure, I think hunters would enjoy them! Also good for food in dire situations, as human meat is probably a lot more gamey than any other available source. Feathers or membranes would also be valued for use in repairing of other elytras, in clothing, ceremonial stuff, etc. Kinda neat!

Tell Sage I love her and her flying skills are unmatched. She's crashed before? Didn't see it. She rules

If any of this is coherent, congrats! If not, poke me so I can explain it! Most of my posts will be one long rant and not really read over again for mistakes or anything so godspeed, buddy! Overall I like your thoughts on the matter you rule!!!! Gives my brain more things to rotate :)

[theincorrigiblegallovanter]

Masking

Masking is something I've been good at, being trans with ADHD and probably Autism I learnt to mask well, it was purely out of the need to survive, it wasn't until I was 30 that I dropped my initial mask but I still have so many.. and at times it's really hard to know what the real me is and what the masked versions of me are. I think in most relationships I keep my masks up because I've been hurt so many times that masking is default for being around any partner because I know they will leave when I drop my masks. I've been told many times that I'm "high maintenance" because my emotional needs have never been met, and at this age in my life I honestly think that no one can fill any of my emotional needs, they're pretty simple call me, want me, tell me you miss me, cuddles you know the basic things you'd expect from a partner.. I dont know how to communicate my needs because I've been alone for more than half my adult life and I've always taken care of me or my partners. I go above and beyond for them and get nothing back in return, I even bought supplies for one ex who repaired a bedside table for her to post she did it on her own.. like bitch I bought you those supplies and helped you and got zero credit fuck you.. and even still I love her and miss her, it's fucked.. I thought I stopped letting people walk over me but obviously I still can't get it right.

My bestie thinks I'll find someone but as much as I would like to think it will happen I can't see it. I'm picky with partners I've tried dating all types of what is around in my area which is just white Aussie girls and I don't think it works, there is one girl who I absolutely get along with but she's straight and seeing a guy just the typical way the universe taunts me. So it is possible I could find a gay version of her but the chance of that I slim to none. Life sucks being me.

I've had therapist amazed by the amount of crap I've been through and remain positive and happy like what the fuck else can I do, be miserable and self loathing I've done that It didn't get me anywhere so I just try and make the most of what I have and in the process try and better myself.

Which reminds me of my conversation to my bestie about being self aware, she hates being self aware because it annoys her that she is and yet so many others aren't and are just oblivious to being assholes and live carefree being shit. I get it tho, for me I've been self aware and continue to be and improve who I am not for anyone else's sake but my own and I guess it does suck because when you do and you realise others haven't a lot of people let people do things to them that are just not on..

Sometimes I wish I could just live without my masks, but with being self aware I know I need to put them up because people can't handle me if I don't. The girl I like that straight she is probably one of the few who has seen me without my masks because we are alike and it feels comfoting to not have to mask around her.

The more I drop my masks the more people won't like me and so I don't know how to handle life without locking myself away from this society that doesn't understand me. "Why can't you just be normal?!" Cause normal is boring!

[etherrreal]

“the things you do for charity”

Pairing: kenma x gn!reader Genre: fluff Summary: kenma's always been a private person, but it was getting increasingly harder to keep his partner off his streams while you live together; so, he decided to join his two loves together for a 24-hour charity stream extravaganza. Word Count: 3,408 Warnings: some swearing, i suppose there are some spoilers from the manga about adult kenma's job? A/N: i'd give my left tit to play some minecraft or mario kart with kenma tbh -Luna

Kenma's career as a popular streamer was one of the many facets of him that shocked you when you’d started dating two years ago. The two of you had first met in an Animal Crossing discord for your city meant for trading and making friends.

After you had gone over to his island to adopt Raymond from him, he let you keep all of your Nook Mile Tickets with the stipulation that you kept in contact with him to "give him updates" about how the cat villager was doing in his new home. His dorky way of trying to flirt with you was what made you pursue him in the first place, and somehow it had led to a very fulfilling relationship.

It was revealed early on that he was a streamer, but he never expanded on it regarding the actual numbers. Curiosity got the best of you one night, and you decided to google him. Besides also learning that he was a YouTuber, you found yourself in awe at the numbers he managed to accumulate across all of his social media.

And if that wasn’t enough, he was also apparently the CEO of his own business.

Once you moved in together around the one-year mark of your relationship, you got to properly witness the amount of work put into streaming and maintaining a social media presence. This also meant that you got to read the wild comments that were left on all of his platforms–and see the occasional surprise nude picture whenever he opened up his DMs around you.

Because of this, Kenma sat you down to have a conversation about your potential appearance on his social media. You both decided by the end of it that his audience would get to know that he was in a committed relationship, but you agreed it would be best to not show your face or reveal any identifying information of yours.

It had been a year since having that conversation, and you’d both stuck to the agreement closely. The most his audience had ever seen of you was your hand whenever you refilled his water bottle for him.

Of course, it was hard sometimes, especially when you had to remain extra quiet around the house and refrain from yelling out a 'baaaabe' whenever you needed something from him, but since he had his own soundproof office, it lessened the room for any accidental error.

Overall, you were content with never showing your face to his audience for the rest of his career. You knew how nasty the internet could get because of their parasocial relationships with influencers and streamers alike, especially when they discovered those influencers and streamers had a partner who wasn't them, even if they knew they never had a chance. You weren't sure your skin was thick enough to deal with rabid angry stans.

Which is why it was so shocking when Kenma decided one day to nix the agreement.

You were in your shared bedroom answering some emails when he came in. He was dressed in a baggy hoodie, sweats, and tied-up hair; his typical look for a stream.

After some time, you noticed that he was still standing in the doorway, not saying anything. When you glanced up at him, you found him awkwardly toying with the strands of hair that had fallen out of his bun, looking down at the ground like he was just waiting for you to notice him.

"Is there something you need, baby?" you asked. "You're just standing there all adorably shy."

"Yeah, so, um, I'm going to be doing a 24-hour stream this weekend to raise money for charity."

"Oh, really? Cool! I guess that means I'll be going to bed alone that night," you joked.

"Yeah, I guess. Um..." He started before scrunching up his face like he was uncomfortable with what he planned to say next.

"What is it? Do you need me to stock up on snacks and energy drinks? Just send me a list. I can pick  them up tomorrow."

"No, that's not it. I was thinking of making a stretch goal be you coming on stream so we can play Minecraft or Mario Kart or something...I mean, I totally understand if you don't feel comfortable. I could always replace it with something else. I know they've been wanting to see me dye my hair a bright color and dress up like an e-boy, so--"

"Really!?" you nearly yelled.

"What? That they want me to dress like an e-boy? Yeah, Kuroo said it would–"

"No, I mean..." You tried to fight the confused expression that was growing on your face, but your squinted eyes gave you away. "You really want me on your stream? Like face and all?"

"....Yeah, I really want to be able to share this with you. But don't feel like you have to do it just to make me happy."

It was a large ask when looking at the full picture. Kenma had his fair share of fans and "stans" who lacked boundaries, as seen from a select few who visited your home several times this year, or the handful that found you on social media already just from seeing a glimpse of your college ring on the hand wrapped around Kenma's water bottle.

There could be a chance you could receive direct hate on your social media just because you were a person who dated a popular streamer. You would then be in the public eye with little privacy and have a magnifying glass on all of your actions and words. Anything you did would then reflect on Kenma.

What if you messed something up and then Kenma lost viewers? Would they try to cancel you or him for it?

You backed away from all the negative thoughts before you could spiral and looked at the metaphorical 'pro' column.

If you agreed to appear on his stream, you would no longer have to sneak around your house in fear of being heard or showing up in his face cam. You both wouldn't have to feel guilty playing games off-camera with each other because you knew Kenma could be streaming it instead.

And who knew? Maybe his fans would like you. You had to admit, it would be a nice ego boost knowing that you were accepted by so many people.

And, most importantly: you could physically ask him in person what he wanted for dinner instead of texting him and waiting an hour for a break so he could respond, while you sat in the next room, starving, stuck in an endless cycle of wondering whether you should make a snack or if you should just hold off for dinner.

Maybe this was a good idea.

"Okay,” you decided, “I'll do it."

"Oh... alright. Cool." Kenma was trying his hardest not to show how excited he was that you agreed. When he saw the contemplative look on your face, he was sure you would decide that it'd just be too much work and say no. But hearing you agree made him giddier than he would ever admit to.

Despite the cool and collected façade he thought he was putting on, you saw the smile that threatened to break through and the red tips of his ears. You wondered if he felt the same weight being lifted off his shoulders as you did, knowing that, after this weekend, you'd both be finally out as an official couple to the world.

And, of course, the nausea of having to do all of it live in front of thousands of people. No biggie.

Saturday afternoon came and at 12pm sharp, Kenma began his grueling 24-hour charity stream. The bar had an overall goal of $150,000, and it began filling up at a constant pace right from the start. Donations ranging from $5 to $500 were flowing in rapidly, and you were trying your best not to feel nervous.

You both agreed that if he reached $50,000 within 5 hours, you would join him for an hour or two of Minecraft later that night. Part of you hoped that the donations would slow down and plateau for a bit, but when you saw Kuroo had donated $1000, specifically with the message that he hoped to see you on stream soon, you realized that it was a pipe dream.

So, you had to be your own hype person for now, to get prepared to show your face to thousands of people and not disappoint Kenma.

Whether it was the promise of your face reveal or the people who genuinely adored charity, it took only four hours for Kenma to break $50,000.

When he saw the number update live on stream, the viewers witnessed the most amount of expression Kenma had ever shown: eyes wide as saucers, mouth slightly agape, body frozen. You could see the gears struggling inside his head struggling to turn and comprehend what they all managed to do so early on in the stream.

"Thanks so much, everyone, for being so generous today... I guess this means we'll be having my partner on later tonight," he announced. You watched his chat explode with excitement, his special emotes flying in the chat.

You picked up your phone to shoot Kenma a quick text.

[you]:: hope you're ready to put our minecraft beds together in front of thousands of people 😏

Unsurprisingly, he left you on read. But dating him for this long meant you weren't even a little bit afraid of double or triple texting.

[you]:: maybe we can kiss under the light of an exploding creeper 😫

[you]:: or have a romantic walk through our rainbow sheep while a phantom looms overhead 🥰

It was after the third text when you finally saw him pick up his phone to text you back. You eagerly awaited his response, only to cackle when you read it.

[my sugar daddy]:: im going to replace you with hinata as my partner if you dont stop

Instead of annoying him any further, you set your phone to charge on your nightstand and went into the bathroom to get ready for the stream later.

Once you emerged, you picked up your phone to check the percentage and noticed a text from Kenma stating that he'd have you on at 8pm. You decided to spend the time until then cooking up some dinner for the both of you.

It seemed like time flew by because by the time you were done eating your food, it was 7:45pm. Only fifteen more minutes before you were live in front of all of Kenma's supporters. You refilled your water bottle and sat on the couch, staring at the blank T.V. as you practically dissociated from reality until Kenma came out of his office to retrieve you.

You noticed that he looked just as nervous as you did, despite his face not showing it the way yours did. His shoulders were up to his ears with tension, and his hoodie drawstring was pulled almost all the way through due to him fiddling with it.

He turned briefly to you after he brought you into his office, gesturing to make sure you knew to wait until he gave you the cue. He sat down, unmuted himself, and took down the 'away' screen he had for his audience.

This was it. Everything was going to change in literally ten seconds.

"Well, everyone...please welcome my partner, (Y/N)."

You walked cautiously around his large gaming chair and sat next to him in your modest desk chair that he had rolled into the room for the occasion.

Okay, you thought to yourself, now don't fuck this up.

"Hi, everyone."

Nailed it.

There was a painful moment of silence before the stream finally caught up, and you both heaved a sigh of relief when you saw nothing but declarations of excitement. Amongst the 'AHHHs' and spam of emotes were sweet comments about your appearance and how cute you two looked as a couple. You peeked over at Kenma and saw the ghost of a smile on his lips, elated to know that he was just as relieved as you were.

"Okay, let's start with the gameplay while we answer some questions," he said.

The questions and gameplay started out mild; when did you both start dating, how did you meet, who asked the other out first. They even asked a few simple questions about you specifically, like your favorite anime and your star sign. And while you did see a few bans in the chat after some inappropriate questions –no, you will not tell them the color of your underwear– most were easy and simple enough to answer.

Then they started to get a bit spicier.

"Bokutoslefttit donated $69.69 and asked, 'what is your main pet peeve with Kenma?'" he read, muttering a 'wow' under his breath at the username.

"Ooh, how can I be polite when exposing you?" you pondered while beating a cow to death with your sword. "It's probably how loud he gets whenever he's playing games with his good headphones on."

"I don't get loud," he defended.

"Oh yeah, you do. I've had to come in here several times to tell you to shut up like I'm your mother. I did it literally two days ago when you were playing with Lev."

"... Next question."

You rolled your eyes at his lack of comment but glanced over at the chat to pull up a new question. You stifled a laugh when you read, "Girlboss420 asked 'who has a fatter ass, Kuroo or (Y/N)?'"

"I'm not answering that."

"Come oooon, this is a Q&A. Can't have the Q’s without the A’s."

"Nope."

You were about to start reprimanding him for implying that Kuroo's ass was fatter than yours when you noticed he ran past you with a group of pillagers following closely behind. You turned to head into the house but when you opened the door, you noticed it was blocked off by obsidian.

"You are the absolute worst!" you exclaimed.

You made a break for it, sprinting past the shooting pillagers and around to the front of the house. You made it inside with only 2 hearts to spare. You turned, in real life, to Kenma to see him tight-lipped to avoid smiling about his betrayal.

"I'm moving my bed downstairs for the rest of the stream."

You both carried on with the stream without another incident, turning to the chat every now and again to answer some questions. Kenma even apologized to you by bringing home a horse that was named "I'm sorry."

It was about an hour and a half after you sat down when Kenma decided that he needed a bathroom break. Your heart fell to your ass when you realized that you'd be all alone to entertain his chat. You considered saying that you needed to pee as well, if it meant not having the spotlight on you.

Instead, when he got up to pee, you smiled and asked him to bring you back a snack and a refill. Oh, how the turns have tabled.

In the meantime, you decided to scroll through the chat and some of the donations to pick out another question to answer since Kenma was gone. You were initially looking for a funny or vulgar comment when you saw one that had a completely different vibe.

"Kermithateblog donated $25.00 and asked, 'what's your favorite part about being with Kenma?' Wow, that's a really sweet question. Let me think for a moment."

You paused to reflect on your relationship with Kenma over the two years you’d been together. You'd had your fair share of highs and lows like any other couple, but, in the end, you both learned how to work things out so you were both equally as happy in the relationship.

"So, as you guys know, he's a busy boy with streaming, creating content for YouTube, and also being a CEO of his own company, which all takes up the majority of his time," you began. "But when he finally can shut off his screens and crawls into bed late at night, I know that he's 100% there with me at that moment. He is able to give me his undivided attention and make me feel like his love for me comes above his love for gaming."

You gave a pause, trying not to get too emotional. You rarely got the chance to gush about Kenma because you knew how much he hated having attention on him, so if this was going to be your only opportunity to do so for a while, then you were going to take it.

"What y'all don't know is that he is the biggest baby when it comes to cuddling," you laughed. "He is absolutely the little spoon most of the time, and he loves when I stroke his hair and love on him all night. In a weird way, it makes me feel special and loved knowing that he trusts me enough to be vulnerable with me. I cherish the amount of time we have together because of that."

What you didn't know was that he had come back from refilling your water bottle rather quickly and stood outside the doorway to hear your speech. His heart almost burst when he heard your tender words describing how he made you feel. He knew that you rarely got to hear how much those quiet moments at night meant to him because he was guarded with his feelings.

Which is why he started into the room on a mission.

You smiled as soon as you saw him. "Welcome back, babe, we were just talking about--"

He approached you swiftly and leaned down to press a gentle kiss on your forehead. You hardly even got to bask in the moment before he was pulling away, setting down your water bottle as he sat back down with his controller in hand like he didn't just expose to his audience how much of a softy he really was.

It was in that moment when you realized how glad you were that you’d decided to appear on stream because you'd be able to look back at that clip over and over again to relive the intimate moment.

Noon on Sunday came at last. Kenma would finally be free from the prison of his office. Not to mention he could finally get off his ass and stretch.

Between your official appearance on stream and the sign-off, you popped in a few more times to say hello to the chat when you brought him some snacks and drinks. You stayed up through most of the night, although you accidentally napped for a few hours during the dead of night which gave you a little boost in energy.

In the end, the stream was a monumental success. Kenma had even managed to blow past his goal of $150k and make it to over $200k, which meant that he'd be getting the full e-body makeover for his next week of streams.

By the time Kenma came into your bedroom after freshening up and having a small snack, you were already dead asleep with your laptop propped open to show his now offline stream.

He tip-toed around the bed quietly, closed your laptop, pulled the covers up and over your curled-up body, and slipped in himself. As he settled, he felt you shift and grab at his worn t-shirt, opening your eyes slightly just to confirm that it's him.

He pulled you against his chest tightly, his body finally able to relax. He was sure it wouldn't be too long before he completely fell out.

"That was more fun than I thought it'd be," he heard you utter quietly.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." His fingers gently danced across your shoulder blades as you mushed your face into his clean shirt. "I can't believe we raised so much today so quickly."

"I'm so proud of you, baby. You worked so hard on this."

"I also donated $2000 anonymously to speed up the process," he mumbled sheepishly, pressing a gentle kiss on the crown of your head in hopes to lessen the blow of his secret.

It was quiet for a moment, and he wondered if he’d genuinely pissed you off before he felt the vibrations from your laugh against his chest.

"...I can't wait to ruin your hair, e-boy."

Written by: Luna