#typically i dont like hating on things because of the amount of time; work
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
So, decided to watch the first bayverse movie to prepare myself for the gutpunch I'm boutta get from the 2012 season 4 finals and honestly... it's not bad
Only complaints is why is the exposure so high in these movies-

I can not not think of people in motion capture suits everytime I look cgi stuff . But that's just a me thing lol
Wait

Bro I was robbed...
It's honestly not as bad as I thought it'd be, it was actually pretty fun. Even with the amount of slow motion shots, but it's like 10 years old so idc.
Oh there is one thing I'm gonna say.
I do not like their faces in the movie... that's a given, but one thing I can't forgive is that stupid fucking shredder suit

He literally looks like one of those shit characters staring into a pool of water little me used to make in 1st grade at the back of my English notebook while listening to pain by three days grace.
What is this.
How does he even fight like that. I just... I can't take him seriously... he's not even scary-
Who thought this was scary? Intimidating?..
Don't answer that, I already know.
I had a whole rant about how much i hated his design but all I'll say is that there is not enough words for how I would describe the pure, visceral hatred I have for that fucking knife mech suit. If they just got rid of those knives, it would've been decent, he didn't need to rob hells kitchen for his first time dressing himself for school.
Anyway, I think I might redesign them. Just a teensy bit(and maybe a little inspired from the concept arts). I'll post it when I'm finished. I'm not touchin the knife man.
Lemme know if you like em when I do :>
#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt bayverse#tmnt 2014#2012 boutta tear out my heart and pummel it in squishy dust again#ouhhh#also#is it just a rule that all leos HAVE to sound like dorks?#i like that rule#bayverse tmnt#knife hands sssss#vinny rambles#rambles#typically i dont like hating on things because of the amount of time; work#usually put into them; and for that; they have my respect#but i still hate the knife hands.#he would look better without em imo
91 notes
·
View notes
Text
i was on NPR talking about Autism shit two weeks ago, and i have the book sales figures from that week and that national media appearance had.... absolutely zero relationship to sales. on the typical week these days, 1,400 to 1,500 copies of Unmasking Autism will sell. The week that I was on NPR there was a slight dip; only about 1,300 books were sold.
i have done a lot of press for my books. For Laziness Does Not Exist I did easily a 100 damn podcasts and radio shows and newspapers and excerpts in magazines. none of it corresponded to a noticeable bump in sales. the biggest "get" my publicist found for my latest book was the Glennon Doyle show, a booking she and her team celebrated and then spent months clamboring excitedly for... it, too, had no obvious relationship to sales.
Unmasking Autism became a bestseller because some other guy made a tiktok about it, and then a bunch of tiktokkers made videos about it too. all on their own. without any prodding from me, or any relationship to me. it was completely organic, passionate, and sincere, and rooted in the book's true merits and usefulness to other people, and that's why it inspired lots of sales. and continues to more than a year and a half later. all the press I did for Unmasking Autism prior to the release of that tiktok did relatively far less. NPR, Goop, the LA Times, Lit Hub, Jacobin, Huffpo, the New York Times, the Financial Times, MSNBC, Business Insider. Didn't matter. at least not much. so why do i bother?
publishers really ride your ass trying to make you give lots of interviews and show up for lots of events but it's all based on the worship of traditional media and magical thinking that it will somehow convert listeners into buyers. and that's just not how it works. the truth is 95% of books never sell more than 5,000 copies, and most people don't buy books or read them. i love reading but i dont think this is itself some terrible loss, as most books are padded-out commodities made for sale more than a work of true artistic passion or scholarly merit, and sometimes listening to a 90 minute interview with an author tells you the bulk of what you need to know.
it's freeing to know that the effort i put into getting my books out into the world have almost zero relationship to the books' success. marketing just does not work. it's a relief. unmasking autism did fabulously because it's actually both good and useful. laziness has had a long life span because it speaks to real problems in people's lives and gives them a message they are desperate to hear. but no amount of thirsty ass online shilling will make somebody realize that and it's maddening to try. you just gotta focus on doing good work, work that you enjoy making or need to make and that you feel good about, let things flop if theyre gonna flop, and keep on living your life.
which is all good news because i really do hate a lot of these fucking interviews. how can i stomach being on npr or in the atlantic or whatever these days given how complicit nearly all major media outlets are in justifying this genocide. like who fuckin cares about them, who wants their approval. who needs it. it's of no value
201 notes
·
View notes
Text
saiki k season 2 lore is insane
cant believe some of my moots said there was barely any lore or character development until the last 2 episodes because what the fuck is thissss (huge spoilers)
making this more organised than my last post about season 1 and the finale
teruhashi at first i really really hated her- of course, i loved and adored her as a character but as a person? no. she is a play on the anime trope of 'perfect mary sue girl' and its so fuckin weird becuase its both exactly that and exactly the opposite. she is perfect and looks beautiful and nobody can compare and basically everyone is falling in love with her or completely and utterly jealous of her- exactly like one of those stereotypical girls in those kinds of animes. but then at the same time shes not. teruhashi is intelligent, cunning, calculating, and puts up a delicate facade practically 24/7. she knows her abilities and utilises them to her absolute fullest, and i completely respect her for that. teruhashi recognises that she is 'gods favourite' and she is not shy in the slightest to manipulate that to ensure she gets the advantage. however, this knowledge of everyone else completely obliterates her own self-perception: she believes that she herself is the very role she is acting. teruhashi is determined that she is absolutely kind and perfect and is in no way wrong with anything she does. and with her lack of experience involving rejection and plainness, she completely overlooks saiki and is utterly confused with him as a whole. and at first, teruhashis obsession with saiki is about getting him to just become another guy- get him to say 'offu' to her. she bugs him, follows him, comes up with ploys, manipulates the world around her to try and get it to happen, uses all of her skills to her advantage, only for nothing. i didnt like her as a high school student to another because she painfully reminds me of a lot of girls i was friends with.
but then as the series goes on...... teruhashi changes. i think it was a gradual thing (such as teruhashi becoming friends with yumehara, even- i dont think she actually had female friends up until yumehara because of the amount of guys around her +the fact that all other girls near her would get overshadowed), but it really showed up for me in episode 17 of season 2. where teruhashi got jealous of aiura (fuuck i gotta talk about this diva). yeahhh it was not pretty. teruhashi began changing herself so that saiki could notice her (and i notice that before, teruhashi had only tried to use her own personal skills to get him to say 'oh wow' so this is the first time shes tried changing herself) and i found saikis attempts to dissuade her interesting too. typically, with all of his attempts, saiki would go into her mind and use his powers to try and turn her off, but this time, he actually told aiura to do it.
i think it was also very interesting that aiura was also changing around her appearance, as it really helped set things in for teruhashi. as they both changed what they were like (teruhashi for a boy (saiki), aiura for a girl (teruhashi)) so teruhashi was only getting more and more confused with that bit. 'if im getting more gyaru and aiura more kawaii then why isnt he reacting to either of us?'. and then saiki gets aiura to talk to teruhashi, and i also found what aiura said to teruhashi interesting. it was all that stuff about saiki and what kind of girl he liked. and i really think that she was telling the truth. i really feel that aiura was just saying things about saiki about a whole for all his relationships, romantic or platonic. he likes people who stay true to themselves. kaido is unafraid to feed his delusions/imagination (whichever you please), toritsuka is always honest with saiki (even if nobody wants to hear that pervy stuff), aiura is unafraid to be boisterous and stylish (even if she is a little bit freaky), kuboyasu is genuinely trying to become a better person (even if it sometimes doesnt work), akechi is determined and didnt let saiki sway him (despite all the obstacles that saiki put in his way), nendo is undoubtedly stupid but he is still kind (saiki watched him jump in front of a truck to save a kid thousands of times), on and on and on.
not only that, it is painfully clear to us the viewers that changing appearances doesnt matter in the slightest to saiki- he only sees it for like 3 seconds (i think he said) before it becomes muscle. curling hair or applying makeup or having more meat on the titties doesnt matter to him at all. what matters is what happens in their head, because while he doesnt get an extensive idea about their outside, he gets overly surrounded by everything on the inside. and thats probably why aiura saw that and said that to teruhashi (even if she cant explain the full reason). so teruhashi returns to normal and says that she will make saiki gasp with her own abilities.
but the strange thing is that shes already given that speech before. i cant say exact episodes from the top of my head but she has totally already said that she would use her charms and looks and sweetness to make him say 'offu' and he has always tried to dissuade her using his powers. but it was this one that made him gasp. and like. i was not expecting it in the slightest ok. but i think it makes sense- she has discovered that she can be confident in herself as a person rather than just her natural looks and is determined nonetheless. i think that saiki recognised around this area that she genuinely liked him as he was, even if she had thought he was 'gloomy and hard to read' (i believe she thought that when with his perv grandpa?) she still wanted to be around him and still had that crush. i love how when teruhashi is talking with other girls (kuriko too, but in this specific case im thinking about is rifuta) about her crush on saiki kusuo, that she would mention that at first, it was pure spite and disbelief that anyone could ignore her like that. and then, teruhashi wouldnt fail to continue and say that she grew to have a genuine crush on saiki that wasnt built upon annoyance at the fact he walked past her. and he discovers that he doesnt particularly mind being the object of her affection (unless her fanbase gets in the way oof) so i think that the offu from was a sort of embarrassed yet begruging acceptance towards this parasite of a girl who has attached herself to him lol
aiura shes sososo cool. i love the freshness(?) of her personality for the rest of the cast. finally a female psychic and i am in love with herr. at first i was a bit skeptical with the whole 'finding my soulmate' thing and i was cackling when saiki was just like 'ah yes she is legit but i am Just Better'. and then she continued to show up more and i love her. shes so quirky and very different from the other girls, who we see as much more feminine and in tune with romance anime tropes than anything, and then she comes in with the gyaru style and i love that so much. not only that, her slang and way of speech compared to the other girls (teruhashi, yumehara, mera) is also very interesting.
not only that, i really loved seeing the anime through her eyes and the auras of other characters including the shock-comedy of saikis. then, as she finds out about his powers and all i really loved how they worked together. i know a lot of other characters also saw that, seeing through teruhashi who commented that they were like the 'opposites attract' trope with 'boring' and 'flamboyant'. but then i also really liked how they worked even without any of the other characters opinions. aiura is still not giving up about the whole soulmates thing and saiki just lets it happen. because his ulterior motives is that she would ward off teruhashi so he begrudgingly accepts her to be near him as she pesters him to date/bang.
and then adding toritsuka into the paragraph, the pk psychic kids are golden. i love love love their dynamics. saiki has more respect for aiura only because he holds none for toritsuka. toritsuka sees saiki as superior and saw aiura as a pair of boobs in the beginning. aiura wants to be with saiki and just hates toritsuka because he tries to flirt. and for every mission they try to do together it always ends up in comedy. when saiki turned kaido and nendo to stone? holy fucking shit that really summed up what they were like. the psychic kids really are a weird band of teenagers with powers and it really showed their personalities in that meeting because. aiura stripping in saikis bed and toritsuka peeking through the door and saiki only sees a pile of muscles on his bed and a perv watching through his door. like cmon
i also want to dig deeper into her powers. she is completely ok with people knowing about her powers (like toritsuka but unlike saiki). she uses them to help people out (unlike toritsuka but like saiki). she uses her powers to her own benefit (like toritsuka but unlike saiki). she doesnt want to burden people with her powers (unlike toritsuka but like saiki). i find them soso interesting too because she questions why saiki doesnt use his powers more openly esp because he just has so many at his disposal. and then he sort of shows her why its a bad idea to so openly help people out by the result of mera and her father and i feel like she toned it down a bit after that too (at least publicly).
childhood lore this was insane. the buildup and everything and how it was presented. it first started with akechi being introduced as a new student and it was already unsettling to see saiki be actually a bit nervous about this guy. and then even more of a shock to see this guy blatantly ask saiki if he was a psychic because what- how the hell would this guy suspect, much less know?! and we learn that they were classmates in elementary school and we see a barely-there flashback to saiki standing in a classroom with childrens bodies scattered around him. so the suspense has started. and then we continue to get pestered by akechi but we know what he wants, but not why and thats the whole deal of it. he is the embodiment of those anime characters who are scarily good at deducing things and has a perfect memory too which makes it all the scarier because we know hes not an idiot unlike the rest of saikis friends.
and then to actually know what happens while saiki is going back in time to change it? masterpiece. we learn more about why akechi is pursuing this answer along with what actually happened to make that happen, along with why saiki cant change it without some sort of grave consequence. and the new knowledge that saiki as a kid without limiters is stronger than teenage saiki with limiters is even scarier because of course saiki wouldnt be able to stop himself.. truly an op main character. i also found it interesting how saiki k (the anime) manages to reuse powers over and over too and in such creative ways and in strange comebacks. he went back in time for his parents, he rewound the earth to one year prior because of the volcano, relived the same moment of nendo dying like thousands of times.. they really only ever hinder him.
and then to know what happens? i thought akechi was a creep for following/knowing everything about saiki but.. knowing everything that he knew at the moment? makes sense. definitely creepy, but much better understood. i feel like it was a good decision from saiki to tell him about his powers. if this isnt the first time theyve been like this, then it really does make sense. they were kids. they still are kids. and omfg saiki saying "i decided not to tell anyone about my abilities after that" because all it did was get akechi into more trouble from bullies. but they are now teenagers and have better cognitive understanding than when they were elementary kids so i feel it was justified for saiki to tell akechi because, after all of that trying with time travel, saiki couldnt stop the series of events unless he was making the world suffer. and akechi deserved at least a bit of closure about what actually happened and why saiki left.
and i feel like this series of events is also what makes saiki who he is in the beginning of the anime. he doesnt want friends at all because if they found out about his power they would be curious and want to know more and blab about it to others. and saiki knows the result from having lived it. because if he gets attached, people he loves get hurt. trying to make friends only causes suffering as akechi got bullied for claiming all those things and saiki hurt other kids using his powers because his emotions got out of control (rightfully!! he was like 8 and his best friend was getting bullied!!! of course he wouldnt be able to control any outbursts).
shipwrekced shipwrecked. i cant forget about this one but i was saving this. i realise i didnt write any notes for this one because i was wayy too focused on the actual happenings to comment. because what the fuck.
yeah that about sums up what i thought at first.
the tropes. holy shit. they added so so many tropes into this one it was. the teenagers on a ship get shipwrecked on an island. all they have are the clothes theyre wearing and miraculously the pantry which washed ashore along with some supplies to build a raft. like all the typical anime things. and even when they suggest to build a raft, saiki agrees with them because its a good cover up. and i really loved the stereotypes that were put upon them: the loner (saiko), the cannibal (mera), pretty woman (teruhashi), leader (kuboyasu), idiot with good ideas (nendo), then saiki and kaido as the ‘followers’ or ‘helpers’.
then i found how saiki got them out genius, despite the fact he was panicking in the beginning about how to fix it. like of course he should be panicking because you cant see any rational way to get out of the situation without telling the rest of them about his powers. and so he tries to keep them alive for a little bit (going home and sleeping, buying food :sob holy shit bruhh), and then when he finally finds a way out (the raft) they play it off as stupid despite being such a stereotype of any shipwrecked movies. and even teruhashi realised that something was off, right? how his clothes were perfectly clean and all, but when he ‘went to work’ (i totally thought he was off to kill something with the saw helpp), he came back dirty. and of course! only saiki would make a whole new island near japan as a way of keeping his powers secret..
i honestly have no idea how to feel about this because.. how did they move on so quickly?! your students/classmates got trapped on an island for a couple of days. shouldnt this be a bigger deal- shouldnt saiki be known as ‘the kid who got trapped on an island’? like bro…. anime logic (if anyone else could. tell me what the hell was up with the shipwrecked episodes other than being satire towards other shipwrecked medias and being a bit of a comedy along with character development towards some characters like saiko)
friends+classmates so like. kuboyasu is a previous gangster and trying to become better/normal (anime trope). and kaido has middle schooler syndrome and thinks hes so cool (/affectionate). they are the two people you would least expect to become besties right. and yet they fit together so well. kuboyasu wants to become normal while kaido wants anything but. kuboyasu is actually strong and able to protect people while kaido can only dream. and it really shows during that mugging episode where kaido knows about kuboyasus past and yet still tells him to run. kaido is so weak and delusional that he probably gives kuboyasu a reason to remain calm and to 'protect his innocence' while kaido wants to be jet black wings and protect everyone no matter their pasts or abilities despite constantly failing and getting into danger and needing that saving himself. and even after that, they continue to hang out with or without others (such as building that fort or taking motorbike classes together??? or even may i mention when kaido trapped himself inside the coffin and kuboyasu was trying to coax him out). so then imagine my shock and delight when they started calling each other shun and aren like OMFGG?? calling people by their first names in japanese culture is a sign of being close with each other (such as chiyo and kokomi). theyre always in close proximity to each other and i adore themm
okok then saiki. and his friendssss. these episodes as a whole just show how much hes grown to care for themm. he follows yumehara and her boyfriend-sworn friend(?) to ensure that neither gets hurt from their misunderstanding. he warms up the classroom for all his classmates because he caress. he foils the plans of the news team to make teruhashi look bad. he stops hairo from getting killed during a robbery. he makes kaidos prank actually happen. he tries to throw akechi off in order to protect both of them from his power. he fucking saved yumehara from falling to her death. he gets beaten up by some fourth graders to help out yuuta. he gets everyone to return their gifts to mera on her birthday. he uses hypnosis to get his class to look better while they perform that play. he catches teruhashi before she falls and carries her to the nurse. he probably wouldnt have done half those things in the first part of season 1. so many of those require him to genuinely care for the people hes helping and not only that, some of those things draw attention to him and he would only let that happen if he truly cares for who he is aiding.
then to add to more about relationships between characters that arent saiki. kuboyasu and saiko. it definitly started as a hate-hate relationship. but then we see saiko crying in the bathroom because mean things were written on his desk and then we also see kuboyasu had tried to clean it off before saiko got there. my heartttt. not only that, but saiko who didnt care about peasants who went out of his way to redo his mansion to fit their tastes? and at first it was for his own ego (so similar to teruhashi omfgg) but then just like her, saiko began to actually care and didnt even understand it himself about why he was so focused on getting them to like him. and ofc he is an ass. he rolls down the window only to close it and drive away because its cold. he withdraws funding from the play just because the class was going behind his back. but its barely his fault. everything is handed to him on a silver platter and he doesnt know better. while kuboyasu had to work for everything. before he was working as a gang leader but now he is working towards being better. and aughh
world lore first off i need to say that the foreshadowing for this was INSANE. do you hear me. i am shaking you by the shoulders while i say that i am still utterly speechless by the implications and impact of episode.
the fucking volcano. holy shit. holy shit. there is so much i have to talk about considering the anime +worldbuilding +foreshadowing +buildup. this is a comedy anime. this is an anime that makes fun of anime tropes constantly. girl running to school with bread in her mouth. background characters. siblings who are a lil too freaky with their siblings. mary sue anime girls. the idiot friends. and then this???? the fact that saiki has been in a time loop for the same year for four years straight is. its literally mentioned by saiki himself when he says 'you might notice something off about this anime' and its poking fun at the fact that high school animes always loop around in order to continue publishing (like how its meant to represent just one year for the main character but theyve had seven winter episodes/chapters and three birthdays for a character). its poking fun at that bit and it uses saiki himself to do it.
the worldbuilding and foreshadowing come hand in hand. in the episode where kuboyasu was first introduced, toritsuka began talking to him about being a transfer student. when kuboyasu asked when toritsuka had entered he said 'second term of second year' so the same as kuboyasu. and we brushed it off as toritsuka being a dumbass. because of course we would, of course kuboyasu would too. but fuckk. we have four transfer students in one year all in second term?? we thought it was just a fucking anime trope thing again. but no. it was all purposeful. and then to add to that, we already knew that saiki had time travel powers. he could control time, we know from his restoration along with (later on from this episode) how he travels back through time for his parents. it was all deliberately set up in that way and so just holy shit.
and now i have to actually talk about that segment itself. the earthquake in the beginning was seemingly comedy and then we see saiki training. cool but not too big of a deal. and then he starts telling us about what the fuck is up just as he tries to stop the volcano. like excuse me?? i found it so very interesting that he continues rewinding time in order to build up his powers daily yet keep the volcano from exploding and intertwining both the time powers and mind control in order to achieve it. and hes gone through second year of high school four times, yet his parents know. it was crazy how nonchalant they were about it too, saying 'oh he can always do it again right' like he is saving the world. how much longer would he do it? how much would he be willing to do? i find saiki so very interesting because he could always just. let the volcano explode but it is in his core to be kind and to help the ones he loves (including the rest of japan). he tries and he knows his limits and yet he is still ready to try again with a new set of abilities.
final thoughts before reawakened too hyperfixated. OOF. anyways im so sad the anime is almost over (for me loll). its sucked me into its grasp because it has everything im looking for. as a high schooler i love all the shenanigans but then as an anime lover i enjoy the satire tropes and as a theatre kid i love the gags and commentary and as a person who looks wayy too deeply into things i love the implications and dark undertones of the series.
#the disastrous life of saiki k#tdlosk#saiki kusuo#saiki no psi nan#saiki k#kusuo saiki#saiki#saiki kusou no psi nan#the disaster of psi kusuo saiki#psychic kusuo#saiki k season 2#rant post#anime recommendation#saiki spoilers#im genuinely so sorry for anyone who decides to press the 'read more' feature because gah damn#this is more than i write for essays at school (because they wont allow me to write more)#how do i have this much about an anime but not for a school project i need to dooo#anyways might have a tiny obsession#sorry im always so disappointed that i cant revisit my thoughts from my first watch so#i have to dump everything before i continue onwards towards new seasons#this is a lot more than what i had for season 1 so. yeah#someone tell me what the fuck was up with the shipwrecked episodes pleaseee
67 notes
·
View notes
Text
Born from the void (Tohru Adachi x Reader)
Chapter 1 - The Entity

"Have you ever been to Inaba?" That was what you heard before being assigned to a serial murder case. Or: How a promotion turned your world upside down.
Words: 4.2k
Masterlist | AO3
Tags (entire fic): Adachi Tohru / Female Reader, Dojima Ryotaro, Dojima Nanako,Investigation Team (Persona Series), POV Second Person, POV Alternating, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Persona 3 Spoilers, Persona 4 Spoilers, Mutual Pining, FluffAngstHurt/Comfort, Getting to Know Each Other, Reader is a Persona User (Persona Series), Strangers to Lovers to Enemies, Eventual Smut, Slow Burn, Explicit Sexual Content, long fic, Canon-Typical Violence, Other Additional Tags to Be Added.
Before you start reading, I wanted to let you know that English isn't my first language. If you think something isn't correct, feel free to let me know. I dont mind!

Something murmured in the distance. It didn’t sound annoying, so you tried to go back to sleep.
Today had been a long day at work. When you arrived at the police station this morning, you had to deal with some endless piles of paperwork that you found on your desk; you were used already to it, as it was one of the most common tasks in your job.
A few hours later, you gathered your things and said goodbye to some of your colleagues, the only thing on his mind was getting some well-deserved sleep. Now you were here, lying in your bed.
You sighed as you rolled over. You loved your job, as it was what you wanted to work for since you were a child, but there were times when you just wanted to quit. You totally despised being given more tasks than others in your same position. While you knew you were an efficient worker, that didn’t give them the right to treat you as their errand girl.
This also happened when you were in the middle of reviewing some documents. You wanted to call it a day every time you found yourself in this situation. Did they really think that they would get away with this every time they didn’t want to do their job?
You desperately wanted to fix this problem, but what were the chances of them listening to you? Once, you tried to talk to them about them, but they clearly ignored you as they quickly dashed out of the office.
You even complained to some of your higher-ups, but they were like talking to a brick wall, trying to get you out of their office and not giving it another thought.
You really were helpless, so you probably should let sleeping dogs lie. Sometimes you truly wished some God would look upon you and give you some kind of rest from this nightmare.
Even though those moments were quite annoying, you were thankful for meeting some kind and warm people who appreciated your presence there and made you feel valued since day one.
Besides, you were glad that other tasks of your job didn't involve working with those jerks. The times when you had to patrol the area on the island were so refreshing.
Recalling your first days on Tatsumi Port Island, you remembered moving here for some work-related issues.
Living in this place had its ups and downs. You really felt luck was on your side - just a few days before your arrival, you found a free apartment a short distance from the Pauwlonia Mall’s police station. It was convenient because you could get there quickly in case of an emergency.
As you walked around your neighbourhood, you tried to get used to your new surroundings. You obviously noticed that it was usually crowded, as it was a popular place for teenagers and young adults, even more so at weekends.
However, you hated crowds since they were draining and overwhelming. Apart from that, masses of people were also much harder to control, not only because they could easily get out of control, but because the amount of officers assigned to patrol the area was insufficient.
Maybe you should move to a more relaxing place, though it would entail a long process regarding your job.
Around half an hour later, you gave up on sleep. You felt frustrated since you had to wake up early tomorrow. Earlier in the day, you heard a sound coming from your phone. When you looked at the screen, you saw a message from Kurosawa.
He was instructed to tell you that the higher-ups required your presence first thing tomorrow. Some important matters were being discussed, and they needed you to be there.
Calls and messages from Officer Kurosawa weren’t as common as one might think, though they had become more frequent over the past year. They were mostly work-related, but that didn’t mean that the two of you didn’t have enough time to catch up after work. He was one of those people who made you feel appreciated.
One of those times, you were idly talking at the Tatsumi East Police Station. After some chit-chatting, you finally planned on going to the Chagall Café in Pauwlonia mall after work, when a group of three guys came through the door.
You didn’t know who they were, but Kurosawa was apparently acquainted with them, especially with the white-haired guy in the middle.
As you watched as they talked with Kurosawa, you felt someone looking straight at you. You quickly realised that the stare belonged to the guy on your left, though you didn’t say anything.
Talking to Makoto Yuki a few weeks later, as he told you that was his name, you got to know him a little. You could say it was a little difficult, as he didn’t seem to like small talk, but you didn’t doubt that he was a good kid.
Even though you didn’t get a chance to meet with the other two guys, Kurosawa mentioned that they were Junpei Iori and Akihiko Sanada, some students from Gekkoukan High School, as well as Makoto.
Thinking about the message you received from Kurosawa just a few hours ago, you couldn’t remember doing anything that would compromise your job. Whenever you had the chance, you always tried to get some work done that wasn't due that same week with the intention of relaxing over the weekend.
You pushed away more intrusive thoughts. Still, it felt strange, as if something wasn't right. You knew that you had fallen asleep on your bed, but you couldn’t feel your pillow under your head or your warm sheets wrapped around you.
Another noise interrupted your thoughts, though it sounded a bit louder than last time. Being more awake than before, you tried to open your eyes to see where it was coming from. However, it didn’t seem possible, as your body wasn’t responding to you. As a result, you started to get overwhelmed. You wouldn’t make a good impression if you didn’t arrive on time.
You ran your hands over the surface beneath you, trying to determine if you were still on your bed. Instead of being on a comfortable and familiar surface, you were lying on a cold and hard floor. You didn’t remember falling asleep on the floor of your living room, though you do remember being sleepy and retiring to your bedroom after having something for dinner.
Did you really fall from your bed when you were dreaming? It didn’t seem unusual coming from you; you recognised that this happened more often than you cared to admit when you had nightmares. Those embarrassing moments had decreased their frequency, though.
Once again, the same sound reached your ears. Trying to pull yourself together, you focused on identifying the noise as it seemed to last longer.
As a consequence of your attempts to wake up, you heard some monotonous and low-level noises. In fact, it might not come from a human.
Suddenly, your head hurt, and you gripped it in a desperate move trying to smother the pain, though it was barely effective. At first sight you didn’t register it, but your hands started to sweat, a clear sign that you were getting worried.
"Hmm. You must be hearing me now."
Huh?
A few seconds later, you detected that the quiet voice wasn’t really coming from a presence in front of you, but rather was sounding inside your head. You felt vulnerable. Your heart started to beat faster, feeling as if someone was intruding your mind.
Trying to analyse the situation, you realised that you were able to move your arms now. After loosening the grip on your head, you tried to move your legs again. This time you didn't struggle to move them as they weren't as stiff as before, but you could still feel a slight discomfort.
Curious about your surroundings, you opened your eyes, though you immediately lowered your head and used your hands to block out the irritating light that just blinded you. After a few moments of waiting for your eyes to stop hurting, you were finally able to open them after a few seconds, feeling a little light-headed.
You felt discouraged by your failed attempt to get to your feet, resulting in your body falling back with a thud. Using your hands to support your body, you managed to sit up carefully.
As soon as your eyes adjusted to your new environment, you spotted a figure squatting down a short distance from you.
Your movement caught its attention, apparently distracted. It tilted its head towards you, crossing its arms and resting them on its knees, as one of them had supported its head just a moment before.
"You seem conscious now. I have been trying to talk to you for a few minutes, but you did not seem aware of it." The creature pointed out while you observed it.
You tried to figure out what it was, but you were only able to describe its head. Definitely not human, or rather, not a living human, clearly because a human wouldn't have a black empty skull for a head.
"You have just suddenly appeared here, though it doesn't seem to have been a conscious action on your part.” It theorised, drumming its fingers against its knee. You also felt it looking at you. Inside each eye socket you could see blue shining points staring right at you, so you assumed they were its eyes.
You felt disoriented. Not really knowing why you were here, you looked for a way to escape this place.
As you observed the surrounding space, you found yourself sitting on a semi-transparent surface. It was levitating above an empty void, in which you could see some black particles. In an impulsive move, you tried to catch some of them, but they quickly slipped through your fingers.
Looking up at the sky, it was very different from what you would see if you were outside. You were surrounded by a galaxy-like sky where every few seconds you could see some shooting stars passing by temporally.
Besides, you thought it was unforgettable, as the blue and pink colours from the sky and the shining stars that hypnotised you were impossible to ignore.
Aside from all the scenery, you saw a black hole far away emitting a sound that resembled groaning voices. Whereas the space around you was unspoiled, you didn’t think it would last much longer, as that black hole was slowly and unavoidably erasing everything around it.
Strangely beautiful. You mused. It could be a lost painting from a renowned painter. However, you felt that it was distracting you from your current situation.
While concentrating on your ‘new reality’, you were now trapped somewhere out there with a strange entity. During the time it took you to identify the area, you really weren’t able to tune out that presence, feeling that it had been focusing its eyes on you all this time. You were sure that you couldn’t willingly leave this place, so your only option was to wait and see what you could do.
Acknowledging your impatience, it opened its mouth again, but closed it, reconsidering its words.
“I have some questions for you.” It waited for your answer. You weren’t really keen on having a conversation, but you might need some information about what was happening right now.
But before you had time to answer, it got up from the floor. Now you could see it completely. The figure had a black, slender human body, decorated with vertical darker and smaller stripes. In the centre of its chest you could see a spherical part resembling what looked like a core. It should be its heart, you thought, raising an eyebrow as you continued to inspect it.
While one arm and one leg were covered in blue torn muscle, the remaining limbs were protected by a scratched bone armour. It also had clawed hands. Something you found curious were the tube-shaped fleshes attached to its head and back. Overall, it looked as if it could collapse at any moment, though it somehow remained intact.
It approached you slowly, as if trying not to frighten you. Reacting to its movement, you hurriedly managed to stand up and step back, putting some distance between the two of you. You didn’t adopt a defensive stance, as it didn’t seem to want to hurt you, but you were still alert. Just in case.
It stopped before taking another step. Apart from limping, you noticed that it made a clicking sound with every step it took, while its muscles made a stretching sound. It was repulsive. You tried not to gag as you ignored those noises.
“So. I assume you don’t know where we are, do you?” It crossed its arms over its chest, in a waiting position. You wondered if this thing had anything to do with this place. Did it create this? Or was it also brought here?
Trying to calm down, you answered. “No, I don’t.” It hummed again as you felt anxious. You scratched your head while trying to distract yourself from being constantly observed by it.
As if it had heard you, it moved its head to the side, examining instead some black sparkles fluttering around it. Although you couldn’t be really sure, it gave the impression that it was spacing out. That thought quickly disappeared the moment it stared at you again.
“What do you remember from last year?” You don’t really know what it was getting at with that question.
You remembered your work routine and hanging out with your coworkers, visiting your parents who lived far away from you and reading some novels in your free time, but nothing out of the ordinary. Some might call you simple, but you did not care at all.
Feeling that you were not getting any additional information from this, you decided to interrupt it before it started talking again.
“What are you?” You stepped back. You were sure that it had clearly heard you, but for some reason it didn’t answer your question right away, instead changing the subject of your conversation.
“I can see it worked perfectly. Maybe if…” It added vaguely, lowering its tone and murmuring more things under its breath, but you could catch some words coming out of its “mouth”.
Although you didn’t know what its intentions were, you could see it raising a hand to its temple.
Instantly, you felt the headache return, though it was more intense than before. It only lasted some seconds before letting you breathe calmly again.
"I thought you would feel accomplished since last time." Its hand reached down and grabbed a book that was strapped to its hip. Opening the book and reading through it, it turned over the pages quickly, desperately looking for something. “Though it seems we will have to intervene again.”
Were you hallucinating or something? You felt drained, besides your questions weren’t being answered, and your head still hurt from the headache from moments before. Were you being ignored?
Your thoughts were interrupted by a sigh, followed by the figure talking to you. “No, I can assure you that I’m not ignoring you. I’m just trying to find out if you remember anything.” Although it was difficult to sense its emotions, you could detect a slight change in its tone, as if it was… melancholic?
Anything? We? You were perplexed. You had never seen this thing before. It had a special look to it, so obviously you would recognise it. Yet, you felt some kind of familiarity.
Could it be interfering with your thoughts? Maybe it had the power to change your memories. Maybe it was trying to manipulate you.
Another thing that didn’t sit right with you was the way it answered your question. How did it know what you were thinking?
“After what happened, it is obvious you wouldn’t remember anything. And yes, let’s say that I can easily read your thoughts, though that’s not what is important right now.” It said, raising its eyes from the book for a moment.
“What are you talking about? Who are you?” You were getting impatient, so you really wanted to quickly end this conversation.
“I wish I could tell you everything I know at the moment, but I promise I can't. Not because I don’t want to help you, but because you have to remember it by yourself.”
You tried to intervene, but you didn't really know what to say. This current and strange situation made you feel uneasy about all that happened. Was it trying to get something by manipulating you?
Why should you trust it? This was the first time you had ever seen it, and this entity was sure when it said that it knew you. What should you do?
“There are some parts of your memories that are inaccessible, even to you.” Though you weren’t truly trusting it, it felt strange. You didn’t know the reason, but it felt as if your mind was trying to block this being from accessing your memories.
At the moment, you preferred to trust your mind over this creature. Though, if what it was saying was true, what could you possibly have done to erase your own memories? Or had something happened?
Trying to think something, you were interrupted by the floor rumbling beneath your feet. While you tried to stand upright, the figure didn’t really seem fussed over it, only looking straight down for a few seconds.
“We are running out of time. I’m sorry, but you have to make a decision right now.” Meanwhile, the rumbling began increasing in intensity. You heard its gravelly voice directed at you again, though it started speaking louder now, as you didn’t seem to answer.
“Supposing that what you are telling me is true, how can I get them back?” It seemed that you had no choice if you wanted to escape and recover what you may have forgotten, though you still were wary.
“You must come across something that triggers your memories.”
“Like what?” Exasperated, you tried to get an answer as fast as you can, as the rumbling made its words hardly impossible to hear.
“It could be anything. If you let me, I might be able to help you. But as I said, you must be the one discovering it.” You were about to agree, but your legs began to shake, and you inevitably fell down. It approached you at a fast pace, trying not to waste any more time.
“I know that you don't trust me, but I only can guarantee to you that I'm not trying to get a benefit from this”. It declared as it approached, kneeling down near your body.
“I'm not sure. What are the consequences of your supposed help?” You hesitated, but did you have any other choice?
“Not really. Though, you will need your memories if you want to correctly approach some future problems.” It said, shrugging its shoulders.
You didn't say anything as you struggled to breathe, but you were sure now that it wanted to get something from you.
“When I have read your mind before, I found out you remember most of the events of the Dark Hour. I think you remember what you had to fight against, don't you? You are going to face some big problems again.”
Why would it need your help after reading your memories of that time? And why would it remind you of those shadows? You were sure that they wouldn't return now that the Dark Hour had been erased.
Besides, it would have surely noticed that you only used weapons now, as you couldn't summon your Persona any more.
During the battle against the Nyx Avatar, your Persona disappeared as it defended you against one of its attacks. After a lot of back and forth attacks between the two sides, the fight was especially exhausting for the S.E.E.S.
Some members of the group were momentarily distracted, as they tried to regain their strength, a moment which Nyx tried to take advantage from. Raising its arm and charging its sword with energy, its goal was to slash through those people.
To prevent this outcome, you rushed to their position and tried to divert the damage somehow. You quickly thought that if your Persona used its power to create a shield, you could make your plan work.
In the end, your plan was successful: you shielded your team from the slash of Nyx's sword and avoided getting them any further damage. Your Persona received all the damage as the shield was torn to pieces.
However, its physical assault didn’t end there. Before you, or your persona, could be aware of what was happening, Nyx swiftly sliced its sword through your Persona, leaving a long scar in its chest.
Though you assumed that the mask of Nyx prevented it from showing any emotion, you sensed as Nyx attacked your Persona in a resentful way.
On top of that, since your Other Self was connected to you, you took some pain as well, which resulted in you falling to the floor and rolling until you collided with one of the pillars of the Tartarus. You could barely move while your team continued to fight.
Returning to your current situation, the entity could see that you were clearly distracted, as it was certain that you were thinking about what had happened in the past.
As the being turned some pages on its book, it picked up some bracelet from inside, and put it in your open palm. The feeling of the accessory on your hand brought you back to reality. The being quickly continued to read a few more pages. It hummed once more and stared at you as it closed its book.
“Do I have to do anything?” You managed to say as you lay face up on the ground. Your only option was to comply. If this being had read your memories of the Dark Hour and seen what you had to face, you supposed that you couldn’t ignore the future events.
Its intention to have a final conversation failed, so it resorted to speaking inside your mind, raising its claw and touching slightly its temple.
“Not at all, just wear it. It should allow me to speak to you again in a few days. Maybe next time we will have more time.” You struggled to stay awake. As you tried to hear what it had to say, you felt an invisible force trying to close your eyes.
“Be careful out there.” You heard some kind of hope coming from it. That was the last thing your ears picked up before blacking out.
You reluctantly opened your eyes the moment your alarm went off. Sitting up in your bed and rubbing your eyes, you felt so confused. What did I dream about last night? You thought as you yawned.
You stretched, trying to clear your mind. The moment you lifted your arms, you groaned. Your body felt sore, but you don’t remember doing any exhausting exercise this week.
“Maybe I've got the flu or something.” You scoffed. Wonderful, you thought, massaging your left arm while moving your eyes to the side.
The clock on your bedside table marked 6.00 am. It’s still early. In a few hours, you were going to attend that meeting Kurosawa talked to you about. You didn’t really want to be late to work, so you got out of bed like a flash.
The moment you put your feet on the wooden floor, you heard something hit the floor and make a metallic sound. Confused, you looked down and saw a bracelet. As you had just woken up, you slowly crouched down. You carefully avoided falling down. While you examined it, you quickly concluded that it was just an ordinary, blue bracelet. Nothing more.
You felt something gnawing at the back of your mind, though. The last thing you remembered from last night’s dream was that creature giving you this accessory as a last resort to maintain some sort of communication with you. What did it genuinely mean with lost memories? And what were you supposed to be looking for? It sounded so vague.
Even though you didn’t know what to do, it also made you ponder about it. Placing your left hand on your remaining wrist, you felt something strange on your skin. As you looked down at your right arm, you saw the bracelet there. You had just unconsciously worn it while you had been spacing out.
Ignoring it for now, as you wanted to make the most of the morning, you got up from the floor and walked up to your window. You held the curtains and kept them open, letting the sun rays softly touch your face. You were satisfied, as they seemed to refresh your mood.
After a few seconds of observing the people walking down the street, you focused on trying to get prepared for today’s meeting. While you were going straight to the bathroom to wash your face, you sighed, not knowing what to feel.
You only hoped for the best, but you were sure that today was certainly going to be a long day.
#adachi x reader#tohru adachi x reader#persona 4#Born from the void#longfic#tohru adachi#persona 4 golden#p4#p4g#adachi tohru#persona 4 x reader#fanfiction
10 notes
·
View notes
Note
I've been wondering about Hope's sire bonds and specifically Hayley's because they never address it in-show. we know Hope's sire bonds work like Klaus' (ie they dont require love/obsession like vampire/vampire ones ex - Damon/Elena) in that whoever her blood turns is immediately loyal to her until they break it. during the gap between s1 and s2 of TO, it's said that hayley spent a lot of time as wolf roaming around the bayou grieving and i like to think with Hayley's previous work breaking hybrids' sire bonds with Klaus, she knew how to break her own and that's when it happened.
on the topic of Hayley and werewolf transitions, it's such a shame they'd killed her already when they had Hope transition as Hayley being the one to talk her through it would make so much more sense than Klaus (also i wanted to see Klaus' wolf form with wolf!Hope, would've been cute) as we'd seen Hayley with the girl in s3 during the road trip and she was always much more in touch with her wolf side than Klaus was. Klaus never seemed like he cared about being a wolf, just what it represented (the power that was stolen from him by Esther & Mikael).
totally random but Legacies deciding that post tribrid transition, Hope could magic herself clothes after turning human from wolf form was so funny to me. it just felt so dumb.
I like your theory about Hayley breaking the sirebond. I think she definitely would have needed to break it being so far away from Hope. She was already missing her the normal amount a mother would be after sending her newborn child away. But with the sirebond on top of it, it would have driven her mad. It would make sense that was what she was doing in the bayou. But I fear you have spent more time thinking about it than the writers. Much like the Damon/Elena sirebond. They wrote it in for a very specific purpose and then just pretended it didn't exist anymore.
I also hated how the writers changed the different bonds to fit the plot. Why would Klaus' sirebond operate any differently than a typical sirebond which requires preexisting feelings. Purely for plot device.
I absolutely hated that they centered Hope transitioning for the first time around Klaus. The man didn't even transition once after he broke the curse. He felt nearly no connection to wolves and didn't understand or try to understand pack life. It should have been Hayley with Hope. Hayley understood being a wolf on a deep level, and as you pointed out, helped people in the past. It was such an unnecessary dig at Hayley to kill her as a vampire. They stripped her of the thing that made her feel most her and then killed her.
I also agree that Klaus didn't care about being a wolf. He cared about power. He needed to be the most powerful, including next to his siblings. TO Season 1 kind of teases Klaus being interested in his wolf side but then it is completely dropped. Except for Klaus shouting about being a hybrid every five seconds.
I feel like all of Legacies was just one big joke honestly. They twisted the rules and laws of the world they spent nearly a decade establishing because they were lazy.
Thanks for the ask!
#tvdu#the originals#the vampire diaries#tvd#the mikaelsons#klaus mikaelson#klope#hayley marshall#haylope#hope mikaelson#anon ask#fandom asks#tvd anon ask#tvd ask#fandom answers#tvdu metas#metas#andrea831 metas#andrea831 metas klaus#andrea831 metas hope#andrea831 metas klope#andrea831 metas hayley#andrea831 metas haylope
23 notes
·
View notes
Note
WIBTA if i warned interviewees/incoming potential employees at my job that it sucks here and also they wont earn any commission pay?
I work in an auto shop and the estimators' pay is a base flat rate plus commission based on how much the shop earns each week. If we dont earn enough in a week for them to earn commission, they still get the flat base pay but they're basically in debt to the company and will not earn commission until that bad week is made up for (so if profit was 50% of budget one week, if we hit 150% the next week that balances out and he hasn't earned any commission. To earn commission that second week we'd need to go over 150%. Multiple bad weeks in a row quickly add up. In theory if someone quits while in the hole they would owe money from their paychecks back to the company). We currently have one estimator and he earns a bit of commission most weeks, nothing crazy. In the past we'd had two for several months and they were both in the red nearly the entire time because (potential) commission earnings had to be split between them (based on the jobs assigned to them), and after going back down to one estimator it took a month and a half for him to dig out and earn commission again.
My manager thinks we need more help on the admin side of the shop again and is trying to hire a second estimator. I work the front desk and overhear them explain the commission in interviews, acting as if they'd earn any. Me, our current estimator, and a few of the techs all think we'd benefit more from hiring a dedicated production manager instead, because we (me, estimator and general manager) currently all juggle the typical production manager job duties, which results in those things often getting done poorly, slowly, or not at all. It seems the current bone being picked is we need to write more estimates to pull in more work, but i handle the schedule (very difficult & fickle without having someone wholely dedicated to managing production that i can discuss it with...) and i dont think a second estimator is fully necessary for the amount of business we're getting. If our estimator had a little more time on his hands (& got a little more practice/got a little faster, he's still relatively new) him and i could bring in a lot more customers.
In the past, corporate has told us its not possible to have a production manager, however plenty of other locations do have one (this is a very large company) and in fact all of our job training constantly refers to the production manager role, even recently updated job aids. It felt like half my training was "the production manager will do x so that you can use this to complete y". Its simply cheaper for corporate to have two estimators earning 0 commission rather than have one estimator earning commission and someone else on a production manager salary.
Im tempted to find a way to warn incoming estimators about how much it'd suck for them to work here so they dont actually hire anyone while we try again to convince corporate that we need a production manager instead, but we're not sure if our manager is fully against the idea of a production manager or if she just doesn't want to stir the pot with corporate (they're already not in love with her), and without our manager on our side, there's a 0% chance we'd ever get a production manager. I do like our manager besides this, and she's generally usually attentive to employee needs, etc. So i would hate to throw her under the bus or sabotage her in any way, but we simply don't see the logic here.
What are these acronyms?
78 notes
·
View notes
Text
Maybe Friends Aren't So Bad
FIRST FIC!! This was a request by @fefe-the-cat! I hope you like it :D
TW for: Canon typical violence, a good amount of swearing (cmon it's Dallas Winston)
773 words
Dallas's day was not going well. Hell, his whole life wasn't going well. He had woken up with a hang over, which was never enjoyable, but he could survive that. It wasn't until he found out Sylvia had cheated on him once again had things really turned to shit.
Dallas needed to pick a fight to release all the pent up emotion he felt. And he did end up finding some random soc to rile up; what he failed to realize was that this particular soc wasn't alone. In fact he had several freinds that Dallas had failed to notice. Friends who were much, much larger than Dallas.
So here Dallas was, limping his way to the Curtis house with blood dripping into one eye. God I hate it when blood gets in my eye Dallas thought as he roughly wiping his eye, just agrivating the wound further.
His plan was to just go in, get cleaned up, get out. No one should've been thereat the moment. Soda and Steve were both working at the DX. Ponyboy, Johnny, and Two-Bit were all at school. Darry should be at his roofing job. Life, however, had other plans. Or rather Darrel Curtis had other plans.
" Glory, Dal, what the hell happened to you?!"
Dallas flinched when he saw that Darry was in fact Not at work. Squeezing his eyes shut for a second to ease the pain from Darry's hollering bringing back that damn hangover headache. Dallas shouldered his way past Darry, trying to get to the bathoom where all the first aid supplies were.
"I'm fine Darry. Now shut it, will ya'? I've got a migraine." Darry wasn't having it though. Stepping infront of Dallas, Darry gripped Dally's shoulders trying to examine his injuries.
"You look like you got the shit beat outta you. Did you get jumped or something?" Dallas glared at his friend… wait��friend? God Dallas really was getting soft. When did he start thinking about the gang as his friends? He never thought about his old gang members back in New York as friends. Why is this any differant. He needed too change the perspective of the gang . They weren't friends. They were allies. Only al- Jesus fucking christ, could that cut stop bleeding?! Blood was dripping into his eye again. He hated when blood got in his eyes.
"-allas? Dallas!?" Dallas was shot out of his thoughts by Darry's worried voice. "Are you ok? I asked you if you needed help cleaning that cut up? it looks like it needs stitches…"
Right. Dallas needs to clean the cuts that littered his face. One of those cuts kept getting blood in his eye. He hated having blood gets in his eye. He wiped his eye again. "Jesus, Darry, I told ya'. Im Fine. I just don't keep any first aid shit at Buck's."
Darry's eyes scrunched up in worry. "Are you sure? Because it looks pretty bad… I've done stitches a few times. They may not be pretty but it'll get the job done."
Dallas gritted his teeth. Why couldn't Darry just let it go? It's not like he should care! Dallas Winston was a no good JD. A hood. He was a bad influince on Ponyboy. He never did anything that was good or useful. All he did was mess up.
In his emotion, Dallas hadn't realized that he was saying his thoughts outloud. But what he did notice was Darry's pained expression. Fuck. Darry wasn't supposed hear that.
"Dal…" Darry's voice was strained with worry. His eyes were soft. Softer than anyones eyes should look while looking at Dallas Winston.
Some emotion that he didn't recognize started to build up in Dallas. And of course Dallas turned that emotion into anger. Because anger is all Dallas knew how to feel.
"What the fuck is that look? Are you pittying me? Dont fucking pitty me Darrel. I'm not some little kid who cant handle himself. I don't need you to worry about me. And I don't— GOD DANMIT WHY DOES BLOOD KEEP DRIPPING IN MY EYE!" Dallas furiously wiped his eye, just worsening the cut that was causing him his strife.
In pain and in a shit emotional state, Dallas began to do something he hadn't done in years. Cry.
It was as the first sob hit that Dallas felt a pair of arms wrap around him. Dally started to cry even more. He hadn't had a hug in… he doesn't even know how long. He melted into his friends arms. Maybe Darry did care about him. Maybe having friends is a good thing. Maybe friends aren't so bad.
#the outsiders#outsiders fanfic#dallas winston#darry curtis#hugging#internet girlfriend darrel shayne curtis jr
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
i wanna talk and ramble about the crochet scene from days gone by and i aint waiting for someone to ask me about it to trigger the nonsense
I LOVE the idea of Moon having a creationist hobby a lot...I feel like we as the dca fandom always assume and assign Sun as the more creative one out of the two for obvious reasons, so the idea that Moon not only finds a hobby first, but ends up with numerous ones tickles me. crochet requires a lot of patience, acceptance of needing to redo all your hard work because you missed a stitch, and its so satisfying when you finally get done with something. it's everything Moon typically isn't!! Moon is impulsive and impatient! Moon does not like change!
the way i write kvei and moon's little crochet nights is always so nice to me too...not only for the routine (kvei for retracking in life, moon because moon just needs one to feel safer, more secure, and to get anything done), but because they end up talking a lot. another thing moon doesnt do a lot of! the rest of the story showcases moon as closed off, blunt, and kinda socially daft for a long while. yet the yarn compels them to blabber. i like it because for me, the way I intended for it to be seen, its a showcase of feeling comfortable and content. its not something obvious to kvei in spite of their time with the two nerds, but to me it is. the subtle signs that in spite of everything, sun and moon still find comfort and a reprieve in their tiny friend.
it makes me hehe when i write the angsty parts. you tiny lesbian. look at you being so stereotypically inept. yes, they like you. yes, they are flirting with you. a lot of human bonding is nonverbal action, things sun and moon have picked up subconsciously from decades of being near people
also also it does make me reflect as i write rn on how this fic is definitely a slow burn, but isnt like the... "oh we gotta get to know each other" type, more the slow pining type. comfortable with what it is that you feel, but discretely eager for more while not knowing what exactly it is that you yearn for. sun and moon discover it first, significantly before kvei will (self sabotage is a bad habit that when ingrained young, becomes so second nature that you never notice its presence) and will spend a STUPID amount of time gently brushing out in the void to find where the boundaries, if any, are. where the lines lay. what you respond to. what they need to do to communicate certain things to you when words are just not enough. the actions they explicitly choose to do, even if they don't feel like you feel. two different ways of experiencing emotions, yet when you do it together, it's addicting.
kinda why i always mentally argue that exploring more nsfw aspects of s/m are inherently FASCINATING and why I anguish that I rarely see people really explore it. if they do, its so brief and easily waived/explained away. i dont like that!! I really dislike the idea that S/M learned sexual attraction. i am so firm in the camp that they don't and can't experience sexual attraction due to how hormone based it is vs romance is so emotion based. that isnt a deterrent though. its forcing a different, less explored path that as an aroace person I REALLY wish I saw more representation of!! I HATE HATE HATE the "oh im aro/ace/etc, i dont find romance/sex appealing. yucky, icky!" rep. its important and it should exist, but its all we get when aromantism and asexuality are fascinating. they inherently change how we approach, react, and feel about a very, very deeply important part of human connection and the human experience. isnt that massive? isn't that worth discussion?
to boil it down to a simple, lukewarm "im not interested" in a character is such a lazy attempt at representation and i dont like settling for it. so i aint. my content is for me and i write and draw what I wish I saw more of because I know nobody else will if we all play the waiting game. the engagement or lack of engagement in these aspects of life does not negate how you feel.
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
me sin posting anyway
sins when sicky wicky going in whatever order idk im eepy
Wrath: somehow even more edgier.. rots in his bed most of the time. he doesnt even bother to do anything productive because he finds no point in doing so
he gets mad when people try to make him get out of bed or invade his personal space. he also hates certain medicines and prefers to eat specific foods that he wouldn't eat otherwise ("they're sick foods, why would i eat them if i'm not sick?")
he's not very skilled at taking care of sick people. he just listens to what they want and ask for, and he doesnt try and bug them unless he truly feels like he needs to (ex. if someone is violently coughing their lungs out or throwing up)
Gluttony: he's reduced to a baby. thats it thats the tweet /j
he tries to stay in bed for the most part, but he does also do his regular work out routines and makes his own food. he typically just makes a stew or a salad for himself and only drinks warm things when he's sick. he's the type of guy that you kind of have to force into bed instead of running around and doing stuff
when it comes to taking care of others he coddles them a ton 😭. he makes their food, makes sure they're okay, and stays close so they don't have to go very far to ask for something. he'll encourage them to do some workouts with him but he respects it if they dont want to
Pride (guys pretend its yellow plz): he's dramatic asf but we love him. he complains a lot about his sickness and makes it known that he isn't happy about it in the slightest. unlike wrath he enjoys getting all the extra attention especially if they make him feel superior even while sick
when it comes to taking care of people it's kind of like tough love. he really only takes care of people he truly cares about and even after that it's followed with a "you should be glad i spent time out of my day to take care of you!" but he does take the time to actually make sure you're okay. he feeds you the medicine himself and probably tries to make you feel fancy, even if you're all stuffy and snotty
Envy: oh wow okay
envy's already kind of bad at taking care of himself, so when he's sick it's pretty bad. he has to practically drag himself out of bed to make himself food or to just use the bathroom, and he either forgets to take medication or takes an awkward amount of it. it's safe to say that a caregiver would benefit him, but he hates being a burden to anyone, and he doesn't like feeling vulnerable either
he worries a lot when it comes to taking care of another person while they're sick. he tries not to come off as pushy or annoying as he tries to make them feel better, but sometimes that doesn't work. he's not a great cook but he does follow some recipes for the person so they can at least eat some good food
Greed: ew. anyway
i think greed would probably hate being sick since he feels like nobody actually takes him seriously, which ticks him off because he likes to have power, and a lot of people don't take him seriously in the first place. he doesn't like to come off as weak either
however if he was taking care of someone else i feel like he'd be so overly nice it's uncomfortable. it feels more like a fake kindness than anything, and of course he'd find a way to fuck around with you any chance he could get.
Sloth: sloth is pretty prone to falling sick. he's very similar to envy, not really taking care of himself properly, but he does a lot of sleeping. i think he'd probably end up sleeping more than he already does while hes sick.
he's always kind of in a daze when he's sick. he's honestly in a daze in general but it seems like whenever he's awake he's dissociated or just delirious
he's pretty bad at taking care of people however he does have good intentions. he makes the bed as comfy as he can, but he is pretty lazy so he's probably not the best person to be taking care of someone. he does get the person whatever they want if they ask for it though.
Lust: he tends to be kind of dramatic too, but not as dramatic as pride. he loves self care and making sure that he's healthy, so he reminds himself to take medication and even logs when he takes it so he can measure how much time should pass before he takes another. he likes eating oatmeal and other soups for the most part, and he's likely drinking broth or some hot chocolate.
when he takes care of people he pampers them with everything they could possibly need. he logs everything in a notebook so he knows when the person needs to take more medication, and he's there for comfort and company. he feels pretty alone when he's sick, so he wants to make sure that the person feels happy despite not being in the best shape.
@stanleyvampire14 come get ur food
#:p#should i do more posts like this?#i dunno what else i'd post about but throw some ideas at me i might do it#this took me like 40 mins get me out#my ocs#sins#sick hcs
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
psychiatry pisses me off so fucking much because WHYYYYY is medicine prescribed like that.
schizophrenia: youre crazy so i dont believe ur experiences. Heres a higher than necessary dose of an antipsychotic to get you under control ensure yours and others safety <3 whats that? youre less fulfilled on the medicine? welll at least you arent an evil scary killer. Also this is definitely your only and worse problem and no one cares about your diet or habits.
autism: youre a child so i dont believe ur experiences. Lets reprogram you and give you stimulants typically for adhd so youll control yourself and stop being so angry and impulsive and emotional and focus on what i want you to. This is your only and worse problem so im not going to consider that you might have adhd or that youre overstimulated and your environment should change.
depression: everyones depressed so heres the pills you know what to do. This will fix it and if it doesnt well just switch over and over and if no medicine works well call you treatment resistant. ill recommend therapy but keep medicating even if i know it wont help without therapy. Whats that? you need your material circumstances helped? Well nothing medicine and therapy can do about that ha ha ha.
like. OBVIOUSLY. a lot of the time mental health medications are NECESSARY!!!!! NECESSARY for intervention. ideally, you should focus on your diet first. then focus on your sleep and circadian rhythm. then focus on movement (NOT exercise. you dont need to exercise you just need to MOVE!). THENNNN if those things are in check TO THE BEST OF YOUR ABILITY then medication should be approached. and therapy and support can be present at every step.
of course that cant happen for everyone. if youre in the midst of a majorly life disrupting psychotic, depressive, manic, or other intense mental health crisis... yes you might want medication to be your first line. it is HARDER to take care of diet, rhythm, and movement if you are having mental health issues. but systematically speaking, the amount of focus on medicine and therapies OVER diet rhythm and movement is not helpful, actually. its this weird conception that the Physical Doctors are for all that, and the Mental Doctors fix your brain. have you ever cut sodas and other high-sugar concentration foods from your regular diet? that alone can improve symptoms of depression and brain fog. i dont know. i get frustrated.
i just. i love medicine, i really do... starting adhd medicine from a younger age improves outcomes regarding early death, addiction, life satisfaction, educational attainment, job stability, and more. the earlier you start, if you need it, the better your outcomes. its been miraculous for me. even something as basic and unhealthy as me being a stupid piece of shit stoner is affected positively. i have less stimulus seeking behaviors, so i dont run out nearly as often. the impulse to buy doesnt come up as often, because i dont burn through everything just trying to meet my psychological need for stimulation. likewise, multiple family members are on the same antidepressant as me. i was on the track to totally shutting down when i started them at 12. being stable enough to manage my anxiety and pay attention to my sensory needs was life saving. with my adhd being untreated and undiagnosed at the time, i still wasnt on top of everything. even medicated i struggle with hygiene. but with my antidepressant i stopped ignoring so many of my sensory needs. so at the very least, i had indicators like hair and smell that i could no longer ignore. i love medicine.
but RAAAAAAAAUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE PHARMA I HATE PSYCHIATRY
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
when i read smut i love when the girl with a dick is a tgirl who loves herself, sometimes i like it when there is some doubt and introspection and the story ends with her being happy.
but sometimes i also love the subversion when someone is really evil and is/isn't punished by the end, like when a futa impregnates a bunch of people and then shows up to do it again a year later.
i love smut narratives like that, which is why i read smut fics instead of watching porn, porn just doesnt go at a pace i can comprehend, or it goes too slow.
also im asexual and amab but i just... dont feel gender? i hate my body hair but it doesnt cause me any dysphoria, i hate my face-hair and sometimes i wish my penis could just stop existing. but at the same time i dont want to be a girl, i just love it when girls are girls.
i just want to renounce all of these manhood things, i hate it when my dad or uncle says something about my body is 'manly', when i try to articulate what i want they get confused because i practically want nothing, i dont want to twirl skirts (though id like to try) or do makeup or be referred to in any hyper-feminine manner.
also i think im masturbating wrong? im constantly hurting my penis to the point of bleeding, am i supposed to use lube? i never learned how to use lube and i dont know how to learn now tho i am very (privately) proud of my ability to do it in the work bathroom, its satisfying to know that im being paid for time i spend jorking it to gay smut
ok this is kind of a lot. i'm going to respond to all of this as kindly as i can but you should know that this is like. A Lot to send anonymously to a stranger. like i know that i reblogged this post but this is a bit beyond the scope of the implied social contract
anyway, again, responding to all of this point-by-point in the best of faith:
yessss i love gender affirmation and a happy ending. i listen to audio porn a lot and my favorite genre is "mushy romance (and sex 😳) for trans woman listeners"
please don't use the word futa around me, and also i would caution you against using it in general. it's a gross derogatory term born from particularly dehumanizing pornographic caricatures of trans women. that said though i do like an evil woman. that particular scenario is darker than i'm generally into but i see the appeal
i totally agree, your typical mass market video porn is intensely uninteresting. yawn
i don't mean to speak over you but "i hate my face-hair and sometimes i wish my penis could just stop existing" sounds a LOT like dysphoria to me. "binary trans woman" is not the only other option you have available to you, and in fact i would argue that "binary trans woman" is an oxymoron. enjoy women (god knows i do) and explore who you are and who you could be. i too had to suffer through years and years of being reassured that i'm so manly and tough and boyish but as much as that sucks you can't let that stop you from being the person you wanna be. also spinning in a skirt is absolutely worth giving a shot at least once, go for it
yes you are masturbating extremely wrong, please please please stop doing whatever it is you're doing. go to the grocery store and buy some ky jelly or something and when you get home squeeze a generous amount on your favorite hand before trying again. for the love of god just do anything other than your current technique
lmao nice #quietquitting
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
el: 6, 10, 12, 16, 30, 39 / fennel: 3, 7, 11, 15, 17, 24 / 19 for both of them and also nalfein pls gimme the crossover lore
omg ok this is gonna be a lot >:)
EL:
6. What weather does your PC prefer? Why?
Overcast/stormy days were a fave before the game because of the gloomy atmophsere they gave & it made it easier to fall into the shadows while tracking his bounties. Post game they're a fave because on the stormiest of days he's able to be outside with Astarion with some caution.
10. How does your PC fidget?
He will forever be fiddeling with his weapons they are rarely ever in their straps if they've stopped for a break.He runs his fingers over the edge of his blades/spins his arrows around before the others tell him to put them away. Just likes to keep a hand on a weapon at all times.
12. If your PC had to set up a date, what would they plan for it?
He is sooo inexperienced with dating, hasn't had many people he could say he's 'dated'. Would not have much of a clue when it comes to typical dating rules/ideas so would probably just try to spend doing something they both enjoy, or taking a walk through a quiet part of town before going home for a nicer dinner than normal. any time spent together is considered a date to him he is big on quality time.
16. What scents do you associate with your PC?
He would always be smelling of dirt/various plants that he's been tending to for his poisons which luckily to most would just have them think he's a keen gardener. through the game though blood sticks to his clothes, the materials he wears dont make for the easiest to clean and back in the city he got his work done without coming into contact with blood usually.
30. How does your PC flirt?
badly no but he doesn't have the best charisma and any flirting he's done in the past relied more on looks than his words but again he's not too practiced or interested in flirting and was sort of stumbling through the affections of Astarion & Halsin. his approach is to just keep things going if someone comes onto him.
39. What would your PC put on their pizza?
he is a plain guy he only vibes with a margarita like me
FENNEL:
3. How would your PC describe themselves?
I dont think he would know how to really. Not past the physical traits. probably unlucky if anything.
7. So if your PC had a car what kind of car would it be
after failing his test a few too many times he would get some random second hand that he doesnt totally hate the look of. preferable a grey one but he would not be a massive car person.
11. How does your PC show affection?
words! when it comes to platonic affection and lots and lots of touch with a partner. He ends the game pretty much attatched to gale at the hip. hes just tall enough to rest his chin on gales shoulders if he hugs him from behind & he loves sitting close enough for their legs to touch around the fire.
15. How does your PC feel about marriage? Weddings?
the moment gale said ily and showed him waterdeep Fennel was writing his vowes in his head. he finds two matching bands and keeps them in his pocket for the rest of the game. he worries about his past all through act 1 & 2 and once he finds out who he was and has the support of the others it gives him the confidence to put it behind him and he knows that he wants a meaningful future with gale, even with the small amount of time theyve spent together.
17. What are your PCs favorite fruits?
Blueberries. he'll gather a whole basket and eat them in one evening.
24. If your PC found a book that detailed their whole life, from birth to whatever death they’ll have, would they read it and why?
I think he would hate read his durge days. remince over the span of the game skipping him killing alfira and stop the moment the book catches up with the present.
19: What is your PC’s Pokemon Gym Leader type and Signature Pokemon?
El would lead a poison type gym & his signature would be a Scolipede
Fennel would lead a pyschic type gym & he would have a Gallade
Nalfein would predictibly lead a dark type gym & his signature would be absol
8 notes
·
View notes
Note
UAGSHDHFK ITS SO FUNNY U SHOULD MENTION TOOTHLESS FROM HTTYD BECAUSE WHEN I WAS DESIGNING A CONCEPT FOR SAGE’S WINGS (which im still in the process of making) HE WAS MY FIRST REFERENCE :’’’) I LOVE NIGHT FURIES
but also to answer some of those previous elytra questions because they have been on my mind . i’ll sort of just be quoting them audvdhfj ive been thinking about them all day
“What if the elytra (after having been fully fused, I guess, but early users apply too) runs out of durability?”
— okay so pre-fusing the elytra is sort of. brittle. not fully but like regular durability you get in normal minecraft; it wears down after a while and this is because of a couple factors
1.) still adjusting to the host, hasn’t gotten the proper intake of blood and nutrients in its wings to fully sustain itself for the while yet so it’s trying to run off what it currently has (which tends to be very little resulting in them damaging over time if not fixed)
2.) it doesn’t wear down post fusion because the mutations and genes mixing in with the host lets it sort of stabilize by itself and become a part of the host entirely; once the “magical” properties of it are slowly simmering and is replaced with blood, skin, bacteria, etc (on that note the tendrils inside the host’s shoulder blades etc also sort of melt and become new veins/paths for blood circulation to take) (dont ask me how that works uhhh magic and minecraft stuff idk)
“Are the wings something you yourself can feel once they’ve fused with you, or is it more like… a neurological thing, where the elytra just know what you’re thinking?”
— OKAY when the tendrils slip in you’ll feel some generous amount of discomfort but pulling them out hurts more than letting them sink in
— new elytra users need a small bit of time to adjust to the wings and get a grasp on how they feel. its sort of different for everyone but at first it feels like a very strange version of pins and needles- you can move the wings around but it feels weird.
— although yeah the parasitic-ish parts of the elytra kind of do. connect with your brain (DIY lobotomy /j) in order to both A.) get the brain to move the wings around and B.) to do all the increased reaction time and instincts shabang (these stay permanently after fusion)
“Could you feel them as an extension to your body? If they get hurt, would you be able to feel it as if it were your arm or something, or would it be numb?”
- new elytra users get a numb sort of sensation when the elytra gets damaged via an arrow or something
- older (fused) elytra users get the similar sensation to the webbing of your fingers being sliced or punctured (owie)
- also at first they do feel like weird body extensions before eventually adjusting and them becoming literal body parts aisnfwidhfjfk
“If you run out of durability on fused elytras, is that something you could ever fix?”
— yes actually!! healing potions + usually phantom membrane is an efficient way of patching up deep wounds— depending on the type of wing it might just require a lot of healing potions and bandages, but eh its different for every user
— although if a massive chunk of those wings is like torn off then oooh. ouchie thats like having ur arm torn off. yeah that probably wont heal
^ — however . you can get fixes where they attach like a leather-like wing and hollow light silver(?) rods onto where the bones end to make a makeshift wing repair (leather is typically dyeable and able to be decorated)
bonita drawing ik . but you get the idea !!!!
“Would you be able to get a new pair if you hadn’t been fused yet?”
— YEAH
— if you get the new pair from another person who used it previously the process of the wings shifting to suit you better will take a while longer and vice versa
“Would you have to try to cut off your old elytra to replace it if you *were* fused?”
— yes
— not a pleasant experience but if you hate ur wings so bad then yes you could probably slice them off (i wonder what you would do with them afterwards?? Whats to do with sliced human-sized wings? … wall decoration?? Could you cook and eat them maybe?)
“could you potentially *pick* how your elytra form to look on you?”
— kkkkkkind of? the elytra by default looks like a weird mix of dragon and beetle wings all in one. good flight but also not infinitely durable like mentioned
— the shape of the wings, however, changes to fit the user from what the elytra can gather from their brain
(for example, Sage’s wings are based off night furies and peregrine falcons — fast speedy creatures due to Sage’s own history of enjoying fast speeds/being thrown or spun around and also from the lack of any fear of heights/falling)
(in fact actually enjoying those things) (yk how some kids ask to be thrown into lakes because they enjoy the sensation. yeah thats her)
“Like, if you tried to repair your elytra using a combination of some standard repair materials (phantom membranes, occasionally scales) as well as some other thing (like parrot feathers, for instance), could you possibly get the elytra to take on a form you’d prefer?”
— this is sort of tricky to answer because like. the elytra chooses what form of wings suits you best.
— mutations, though? Like having the elytra change from the dragon-beetle-ish look to having feathers and bright colours? That’s still achievable!! Theres even the possibility to mix and match different biological materials from the desired creatures however if you add in too many the elytra might like. kill you by accident or something (im talking more than like 5 or 7) (usually people opt to have only one or two main repair materials) (3 is teetering on the edge slightly i imagine because of like. neurological effects with all the mutations both physically behaviourally and mentally etc etc)
this also kind of raises the question of “how do you get bug wings” and i’ll be honest w u i have no idea. I imagine there’d be *some* strange way to achieve it? go ham many methods for elytra repairing
( mini rant of sage vv)
(Her way of flying is very similar to toothless in the first two movies. shes sleek and elegant in that cat-like fashion but she also does dive bombs and spins and rolls and is overall extremely confident, nigh cocky with how she flies. a lot of control too!! ,,,, most of the time has definitely crash landed several times) (not to mention speed,,,,, in certain situations when she picks up enough velocity you can hear a whistle coming from the air being sliced by her wings . no idea how to explain but you get the idea)
ALSO THE PHANON TAG IS ALR !! she/her pronouns for me but idrc if you use they/them ajdbfjk
Apologies for the late response, I wanted to make some quick doodles for this at the least!!! It's so fascinating to me! A sidenote before I forget-- what do you think about rocket-propelled elytra flight? Would that be possible at all, or do we pretend canon isn't there for it? It's very silly to think of, but I don't think it'd be very safe, lol.
Here's a rough gif of how I think it might work! (emphasis on might). The 'elytra' (used to refer to the parasite in this sense) feels like a bug to me... like a palm-sized ladybug, sort of. Just the right size to fit on the small of your back pretty easily. Once you set it there, it'll like... pinch/hurt a bit as it sets in its initial veins & whatnot to connect to you, but it just chills there otherwise. I feel like for pre-fused elytras, trying to take one off would feel kinda like a tick? Gross, but hey
I also use "elytra" in the literal sense-- the hard, chitinous sheaths that cover bug wings-- here, so I could draw it in my head. I think that wouldn't be very comfortable to sit back on, to be honest, if you were in a high-backed chair or something. Anyways, like bug wings they'd unfold and the blood that goes through them would fill them up to full size like you said! It'd likely happen in a matter of seconds for long-time users, but take up to a couple minutes for first-timers.
I've also got a couple post-fusion drawings here, under the cut bc it's kinda veiny and a little gross, so if you're averted to that thing, look away!

Again, bonita drawing, but just to get it out of my head. The main "body" of the elytra would start to stretch down your back to get further up along your spine, where all the good veins are! Eventually, the body of it would be more vestigial than anything, because it no longer needs it to look for a host (do you think elytras in end cities would be able to wander freely before fusing to someone? Kinda funny to think of someone just getting like. hit in the face by a stray elytra buzzing around).
I do have this as bug in my head, because my brain loves making sense of things, so it's struggling to figure out how other wing types would work. I know it's magical, so whatever goes, but hmm... maybe the customization just comes after fusing, when the elytra doesn't need to expend the extra energy on needing to find a new host, and can instead divert it to making different, sturdier wings...?
I like the makeshift wing repair with lightweight metals or leather and whatnot, it'd be neat to explore that! Just like toothless :). Color & style customization, too! Do you think anybody gets wing jewelry or piercings just to show off? Like irl vultures with wing tags?
"(i wonder what you would do with them afterwards?? Whats to do with sliced human-sized wings? … wall decoration?? Could you cook and eat them maybe?)" -- I mean, if we're in a world with human-sized wings, there's most likely a market for them! I wouldn't be surprised if long-term elytra users were hunted for sport if they had a particularly unique wing type... Wall decoration, for sure, I think hunters would enjoy them! Also good for food in dire situations, as human meat is probably a lot more gamey than any other available source. Feathers or membranes would also be valued for use in repairing of other elytras, in clothing, ceremonial stuff, etc. Kinda neat!
Tell Sage I love her and her flying skills are unmatched. She's crashed before? Didn't see it. She rules
If any of this is coherent, congrats! If not, poke me so I can explain it! Most of my posts will be one long rant and not really read over again for mistakes or anything so godspeed, buddy! Overall I like your thoughts on the matter you rule!!!! Gives my brain more things to rotate :)
#glowstone23b asks#glowstone23b gif#glowstone23b art#phanon#brandnewinvention#minecraft elytra#minecraft worldbuilding#so so cool bud#i love it thank you for the asks
11 notes
·
View notes
Text


- 🌷🌷🌷 -
DNI
❌Do not mix my content with reality. If you cannot tell between fiction and reality then I ask of you to simply not interact at all
❌ I understand if you are disturbed or bothered by dark content, but I ask you to not bash at me. Simply not interact at all, I create sfw and lighter work for those who do not enjoy such content
❌ I will not allow any negativity on here, so have some basic manners will you?
❌ No incest/bots/homophobia/transphobia/bigots (The amounts of times i've been so enraged due to the disrespect and discrimination!) General hate/ Pedophilia
❌ Blank blogs. If you dont want me to interpret you as a bot please at least have some pfp and picture or bio on your page. SOMETHING to lmk ur not a bot because if not then I will block you!
❌ I ask of you to please not trauma dump when I do not know you
To Note
❗I would like to make my blog a safe space for everyone, please dont be shy to share your little rambles, dark or wholesome I'm willing to read it!
❗ I wont be writing/drawing anything NSFW (smut).Though I am fine with making dirty/sexual jokes for the fun of it. At most it'll only either be heavily/lightly suggestive or/and implied if I ever were to write/draw anything in that area or were to include it. (I have my thirst moments too after all)
❗I really like horror, so dont be surprised if I expand to gore or the general field of horror. Sometimes i like to focus on the horror aspect more, so [said character] may or may not be an automatic yandere for that purpose
❗ I love yanderes!!! I think they are personally fun to write about and think about. But of course I love characters who aren't in the yandere themes as well (such as Miyamura or Genya)^^
❗My Blog is Multifandom. Dont expect me to only post content for only one fandom. Though asks are open and free for you to ramble!
❗ I'm a little shy in all honesty but please dont be shy to say hi<3 I'll start warming up to you if we interact often and i'm pretty friendly!
❗If you want to be mutuals please actually interact with me first before asking.
❗I am alright with being tagged in posts<3
❗ I am open to suggestions, chit chat, or your little rambles! It might help me wrack up another idea to write or draw about ^^
❗Please depict the characters as 18+ please because I usually like to write in settings where you'd be of age to attend or do such things (such as working in a specific profession or going to raves) unless stated or interpreted as otherwise.
❗I do not condone any toxic or your typical yandere traits in real life, along with a lot of immoral and dark themes. I know what im doing, I simply enjoy these themes in fiction. Do not base me as a bad person in real life because of that
❗I wish to Indulge in you to put it quite simply<3
Request Rules
✔️ As long as you can provide me a scenario/situation/idea/plot of a character I can make do with it!
✔️ Preferably limit to 5 people when asking at most!
✔️I have the right to refuse a request if I seem uncomfy/iffy/or unfamiliar with what's being requested
✔️ It would be great if you were to be specific with what you would like to request, in that way I can fit it to what you desire! I'm willing to indulge in you <3 Though its fine if you were to make it broad or general
✔️Although being neurodivergent myself I would like to ask you not to be too heavy on such specific topics when requesting.
✔️ Theres no specific way to give an ask, so just go for whatevers on your mind! <3
With that, I think I added all that I could think of. So please do enjoy your stay, that is if you decide to🌷
~Sincerly, Jay/Jello

Due to be edited anytime if needed
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
YES TO ALL OF THIS OP, this is VITAL information, but also
Two riders can ride one horse
NO. I know how romantic it is for the male lead to rescue your heroine and carry her away on his horse but unless it is a VERY short distance or a VERY large horse (think draft) it is totally unfair and very bad for its back to make a horse carry the weight of two riders.
You can bond with a horse instantly the first time you meet it
Well yes, but also no. Sometimes you will just click with a horse. I know when we went to look at my mare there was just something in me that knew she was mine. But there is not going to be this magical moment when you meet a horse that it bonds to you and issues it had with other people are going to vanish. Like with any other relationship, it takes time to build a bond with a horse. And bonding doesn't just come through riding (on the contrary most of it happens on the ground). It happens during feeding and grooming, it happens in round pen work, heck it even happens when you go catch them in the pasture. And lots of people (myself included) when they want to build a relationship, they will make an effort to do things that the horse enjoys whether its a riding or groundwork exercise or a game.
And then some fun facts that i dont think have misconceptions around them but are still nice information to know.
Every horses brain works differently (and therefore there is no one size fits all training program.)
The best example of this I can think of is the difference between my sisters gelding and my mare. Her gelding Storm HATES groundwork, he has a very active brain and he finds it boring. My sister is a trainer and a firm believer in groundwork but she fixes most of his issues under saddle because thats what they both like better, and thats what he responds to. My mare Ahsoka however, loves groundwork. She is also very smart, but she enjoys doing things on the ground.
And not only is it a riding vs groundwork, but every horse is going to run into different obstacles in their training. Some horses are just going to have the personality to be scared of everything and will need a lot of confidence building, some horses are going to take every new thing they see in stride and not bat an eye. They're all different.
Horses have to constantly eat or they will get ulcers
This is something that I dont feel like is talked about enough in the equestrian community. Horses constantly produce stomach acid, so they have to always have something in their belly or they will get too much of a buildup and get ulcers that are very uncomfortable to them, and typically end up being very difficult and costly to treat. We try to make sure ours don't go more than a few hours without an opportunity to eat (ie: if they are at a show or on the trailler) and if we know it will be that long we feed them alfalfa to make a mat on their stomach to keep the acid down.
Lots of aggressive horses are just in pain
There are plenty of aggressive horses. Horses that have been mistreated and therefore react violently out of fear, horses that haven't been taught proper boundaries etc. But plenty of horses with aggressive traits are just in pain, whether it be ulcers or back issues or anything else they are just trying to tell you that they are hurting.
Lots of other issues are also physically related. Whether it be an unwillingness to take a bit, or a refusal to move their body correctly when asked, or being saddle shy, a good horse owner always rules out pain before they see it as a training issue. They cant speak English, and reacting is the only way they know how to tell us.
Horses are walking vet bills
Its not an if your horse will get sick or injured its a when. Horses are smart but they are also stupid. They are going to colic on a Saturday when your about to leave to go out. You're gonna wake up one morning and somebody has their leg stuck in the fence (how? it shouldnt be possible but here we are) and now that small amount of swelling and tiny cut has cellulitis so now you're on antibiotics and coldhosing everyday. Just last week my friends horse who has trailered in that specific trailer hundred of times cut her eyelid open in the trailer while she was pulling out of the driveway and had to get stitches. (we still dont know how she managed)
Horses can and do get performance anxiety
My sister and Storm run barrels (me and Ahsoka will, we are working towards getting her ready). Their work at practice is perfection, but sometimes at shows (he knows the difference between a show and not) he gets nervous and doesn't do as well as he can because of it. They are not stupid, they know when there is pressure to do it the best. They will also feed off of your anxiety because they can sense that.
Spur PSA:
OP objects to spurs, which is fine and completely understandable, but I would like to share a little bit of information to people who don't know anything about them.
Spurs get a very bad wrap because there are lots of people who misuse them. When used CORRECTLY they are simply a signaling tool. They should not be jabbed into a horses side, they should never be sharp enough to cause any sort of pain. Spurs should only be used on advanced horses with specified cues that require spurs. They are less surface area so therefore they can pinpoint a specific spot for a specific cue so that a horse can work virtually completely off of leg pressure. (now this is coming from someone who's has a majority of experience with spurs in the ranch pleasure world). The difference of a very small amount of space can be the difference in a cue for side-passing or pivoting or just moving off on that side. A heel is too large to communicate those differences clearly. They are tool no different than a bit or a saddle or a crop when used correctly. But they should only be used by a rider that knows how to use them and on a horse that is ready for that type of cue. We use whats called bumper spurs, which are (forgive me i suck at explaining shapes of things) a curved piece of wire that attaches on both sides so they part that touches the horse isn't a point of any kind, but in the right hands traditional spurs can be used in a way that is perfectly fine. It's all up to that individual horse and rider team and what works best for both of them.
Horses: Since There Seems To Be A Knowledge Gap
I'm going to go ahead and preface this with: I comment pretty regularly on clips and photos featuring horses and horseback riding, often answering questions or providing explanations for how or why certain things are done. I was a stable hand and barrel racer growing up, and during my 11 year tenure on tumblr, Professional Horse Commentary is a very niche, yet very necessary, subject that needs filling. Here are some of the literary and creative gaps I've noticed in well meaning (and very good!) creators trying to portray horses and riding realistically that... well, most of you don't seem to even be aware of, because you wouldn't know unless you worked with horses directly!
Some Of The Most Common Horse + Riding Mistakes I See:
-Anybody can ride any horse if you hold on tight enough/have ridden once before.
Nope. No, no, no, no, aaaaaaaand, no. Horseback riding has, historically, been treated as a life skill taught from surprisingly young ages. It wasn't unusual in the pre-vehicular eras to start teaching children as young as 4 to begin to ride, because horses don't come with airbags, and every horse is different. For most adults, it can take months or years of regular lessons to learn to ride well in the saddle, and that's just riding; not working or practicing a sport.
Furthermore, horses often reject riders they don't know. Unless a horse has been trained like a teaching horse, which is taught to tolerate riders of all skill and experience levels, it will take extreme issue with having some random person try to climb on their back. Royalty, nobility, and the knighted classes are commonly associated with the "having a favorite special horse" trope, because it's true! Just like you can have a particularly special bond with a pet or service animal that verges on parental, the same can apply with horses. Happy horses love their owners/riders, and will straight-up do their best to murder anyone that tries to ride them without permission.
-Horses are stupid/have no personality.
There isn't a more dangerous assumption to make than assuming a horse is stupid. Every horse has a unique personality, with traits that can be consistent between breeds (again, like cat and dog breeds often have distinct behavior traits associated with them), but those traits manifest differently from animal to animal.
My mother had an Arabian horse, Zipper, that hated being kicked as a signal to gallop. One day, her mom and stepdad had a particularly unpleasant visitor; an older gentleman that insisted on riding Zipper, but refused to listen to my mother's warnings never to kick him. "Kicking" constitutes hitting the horse's side(s) with your heels, whether you have spurs on or not. Most horses only need a gentle squeeze to know what you want them to do.
Anyway, Zipper made eye-contact with my mom, asking for permission. He understood what she meant when she nodded at him. He proceeded to give this asshole of a rider road rash on the side of the paddock fence and sent him to the emergency room. He wouldn't have done it if he didn't have the permission from the rider he respected, and was intelligent enough to ask, "mind if I teach this guy a lesson?" with his eyes, and understand, "Go for it, buddy," from my mom in return.
-Riding bareback is possible to do if you hold onto the horse's mane really tight.
Riding a horse bareback (with no saddle, stirrups, or traditional harness around the horse's head) is unbelievably difficult to learn, particularly have testicles and value keeping them. Even professional riders and equestrians find ourselves relying on tack (the stuff you put on a horse to ride it) to stay stable on our horses, even if we've been riding that particular horse for years and have a very positive, trusting relationship.
Horses sweat like people do. The more they run, the more their hair saturates with sweat and makes staying seated on them slippery. Hell, an overworked horse can sweat so heavily that the saddle slips off its back. It's also essential to brush and bathe a horse before it's ridden in order to keep it healthier, so their hair is often quite slick from either being very clean or very damp. In order to ride like that, you have to develop the ability to synchronize your entire body's rhythm's with the rhythm of the horse's body beneath you, and quite literally move as one. Without stirrups, most people can't do it, and some people can never master bareback riding no matter how many years they spend trying to learn.
-You can be distracted and make casual conversation while a horse is standing untethered in the middle of a barn or field.
At every barn I've ever worked at, it's been standard practice with every single horse, regardless of age or temperament, to secure their heads while they're being tacked up or tacked down. The secures for doing this are simple ropes with clips that are designed to attach to the horse's halter (the headwear for a horse that isn't being ridden; they have no bit that goes in the horse's mouth, and no reins for a rider to hold) on metal O rings on either side of the horse's head. This is not distressing to the horse, because we give them plenty of slack to turn their heads and look around comfortably.
The problem with trying to tack up an unrestrained horse while chatting with fellow stable hands or riders is that horses know when you're distracted! And they often try to get away with stuff when they know you're not looking! In a barn, a horse often knows where the food is stored, and will often try to tiptoe off to sneak into the feed room.
Horses that get into the feed room are often at a high risk of dying. While extremely intelligent, they don't have the ability to throw up, and they don't have the ability to tell that their stomach is full and should stop eating. Allowing a horse into a feed/grain room WILL allow it to eat itself to death.
Other common woes stable hands and riders deal with when trying to handle a horse with an unrestrained head is getting bitten! Horses express affection between members of their own herd, and those they consider friends and family, through nibbling and surprisingly rough biting. It's not called "horseplay" for nothing, because during my years working with horses out in the pasture, it wasn't uncommon at all for me to find individuals with bloody bite marks on their withers (that high part on the middle of the back of their shoulders most people instinctively reach for when they try to get up), and on their backsides. I've been love-bitten by horses before, and while flattering, they hurt like hell on fleshy human skin.
So, for the safety of the horse, and everybody else, always make a show of somehow controlling the animal's head when hands-on and on the ground with them.
-Big Horse = War Horse
Startlingly, the opposite is usually the case! Draft and carriage horses, like Percherons and Friesians, were never meant to be used in warfare. Draft horses are usually bred to be extremely even-tempered, hard to spook, and trustworthy around small children and animals. Historically, they're the tractors of the farm if you could afford to upgrade from oxen, and were never built to be fast or agile in a battlefield situation.
More importantly, just because a horse is imposing and huge doesn't make it a good candidate for carrying heavy weights. A real thing that I had to be part of enforcing when I worked at a teaching ranch was a weight limit. Yeah, it felt shitty to tell people they couldn't ride because we didn't have any horses strong enough to carry them due to their weight, but it's a matter of the animal's safety. A big/tall/chonky horse is more likely to be built to pull heavy loads, but not carry them flat on their spines. Horses' muscular power is predominantly in their ability to run and pull things, and too heavy a rider can literally break a horse's spine and force us to euthanize it.
Some of the best war horses out there are from the "hot blood" family. Hot blooded horses are often from dry, hot, arid climates, are very small and slight (such as Arabian horses), and are notoriously fickle and flighty. They're also a lot more likely to paw/bite/kick when spooked, and have even sometimes been historically trained to fight alongside their rider if their rider is dismounted in combat; kicking and rearing to keep other soldiers at a distance.
-Any horse can be ridden if it likes you enough.
Just like it can take a lifetime to learn to ride easily, it can take a lifetime of training for a horse to comfortably take to being ridden or taking part in a job, like pulling a carriage. Much like service animals, horses are typically trained from extremely young ages to be reared into the job that's given to them, and an adult horse with no experience carrying a rider is going to be just as scared as a rider who's never actually ridden a horse.
Just as well, the process of tacking up a horse isn't always the most comfortable experience for the horse. To keep the saddle centered on the horse's back when moving at rough or fast paces, it's essential to tighten the belly strap (cinch) of the saddle as tightly as possible around the horse's belly. For the horse, it's like wearing a tight corset, chafes, and even leaves indents in their skin afterward that they love having rinsed with water and scratched. Some horses will learn to inflate their bellies while you're tightening the cinch so you can't get it as tight as it needs to be, and then exhale when they think you're done tightening it.
When you're working with a horse wearing a bridle, especially one with a bit, it can be a shocking sensory experience to a horse that's never used a bit before. While they lack a set of teeth naturally, so the bit doesn't actually hurt them, imagine having a metal rod shoved in your mouth horizontally! Unless you understand why it's important for the person you care about not dying, you'd be pretty pissed about having to keep it in there!
-Horseback riding isn't exercise.
If you're not using every muscle in your body to ride with, you're not doing it right.
Riding requires every ounce of muscle control you have in your entire body - although this doesn't mean it wasn't realistic for people with fat bodies to stay their weight while also being avid riders; it doesn't mean the muscles aren't there. To stay on the horse, you need to learn how it feels when it moves at different gaits (walk, trot, canter, gallop), how to instruct it to switch leads (dominant legs; essential for precise turning and ease of communication between you and the horse), and not falling off. While good riders look like they're barely moving at all, that's only because they're good riders. They know how to move so seamlessly with the horse, feeling their movements like their own, that they can compensate with their legs and waists to not bounce out of the saddle altogether or slide off to one side. I guarantee if you ride a horse longer than 30 minutes for the first time, your legs alone will barely work and feel like rubber.
-Horses aren't affectionate.
Horses are extraordinarily affectionate toward the right people. As prey animals, they're usually wary of people they don't know, or have only recently met. They also - again, like service animals - have a "work mode" and a "casual mode" depending upon what they're doing at the time. Horses will give kisses like puppies, wiggle their upper lips on your hair/arms to groom you, lean into neck-hugs, and even cuddle in their pasture or stall if it's time to nap and you join them by leaning against their sides. If they see you coming up from afar and are excited to see you, they'll whinny and squeal while galloping to meet you at the gate. They'll deliberately swat you with their tails to tease you, and will often follow you around the pasture if they're allowed to regardless of what you're up to.
-Riding crops are cruel.
Only cruel people use riding crops to hurt their horses. Spurs? I personally object to, because any horse that knows you well doesn't need something sharp jabbing them in the side for emphasis when you're trying to tell them where you want them to go. Crops? Are genuinely harmless tools used for signalling a horse.
I mean, think about it. Why would crops be inherently cruel instruments if you need to trust a horse not to be afraid of you and throw you off when you're riding it?
Crops are best used just to lightly tap on the left or right flank of the horse, and aren't universally used with all forms of riding. You'll mainly see crops used with English riding, and they're just tools for communicating with the horse without needing to speak.
-There's only one way to ride a horse.
Not. At. All. At most teaching ranches, you'll get two options: Western, or English, because they tend to be the most popular for shows and also the most common to find equipment for. English riding uses a thinner, smaller saddle, narrower stirrups, and much thinner bridles. I, personally, didn't like English style riding because I never felt very stable in such a thin saddle with such small stirrups, and didn't start learning until my mid teens. English style riding tends to focus more on your posture and deportment in the saddle, and your ability to show off your stability and apparent immovability on the horse. It was generally just a bit too stiff and formal for me.
Western style riding utilizes heavier bridles, bigger saddles (with the iconic horn on the front), and broader stirrups. Like its name may suggest, Western riding is more about figuring out how to be steady in the saddle while going fast and being mobile with your upper body. Western style riding is generally the style preferred for working-type shows, such as horseback archery, gunning, barrel racing, and even rodeo riding.
-Wealthy horse owners have no relationship with their horses.
This is loosely untrue, but I've seen cases where it is. Basically, horses need to feel like they're working for someone that matters to them in order to behave well with a rider and not get impatient or bored. While it's common for people to board horses at off-property ranches (boarding ranches) for cost and space purposes, it's been historically the truth that having help is usually necessary with horses at some point. What matters is who spends the most time with the animal treating it like a living being, rather than a mode of transport or a tool. There's no harm in stable hands handling the daily upkeep; hay bales and water buckets are heavy, and we're there to profit off the labor you don't want or have the time to do. You get up early to go to work; we get up early to look after your horses. Good owners/boarders visit often and spend as much of their spare time as they can with spending quality work and playtime with their horses. Otherwise, the horses look to the stable hands for emotional support and care.
So, maybe you're writing a knight that doesn't really care much for looking after his horse, but his squire is really dedicated to keeping up with it? There's a better chance of the horse having a more affectionate relationship with the squire thanks to the time the squire spends on looking after it, while the horse is more likely to tolerate the knight that owns it as being a source of discipline if it misbehaves. That doesn't mean the knight is its favorite person. When it comes to horses, their love must be earned, and you can only earn it by spending time with them hands-on.
-Horses can graze anywhere without concern.
This is a mistake that results in a lot of premature deaths! A big part of the cost of owning a horse - even before you buy one - is having the property that will be its pasture assessed for poisonous plants, and having those plants removed from being within the animal's reach. This is an essential part of farm upkeep every year, because horses really can't tell what's toxic and what isn't. One of the reasons it's essential to secure a horse when you aren't riding it is to ensure it only has a very limited range to graze on, and it's your responsibility as the owner/rider to know how to identify dangerous plants and keep your horses away from them.
There's probably more. AMA in my askbox if you have any questions, but that's all for now. Happy writing.
#Horses#writing reference#writing advice#horsblr#honestly all of OPs facts are far more important than mine#BUT i felt like adding because the two riders on one horse for long distances KILLS ME
8K notes
·
View notes
Note
your blog has “Ask me about Ritsu Shinjo” on it rn so I wanted to ask all the things you like about Ritsu Shinjo
(also, watching the tkdb brainrot consume you has been fun hehe. tempted to play it again but I didn’t get very far hehe, only up to book 4)
(also also, Hi :D)
FINALLY SOMEONE DID. THANK YOU RHEA.
wait omg. sinostra book is book four. how far did you get. DID YOU MEET RITSU. I NEED TO KNOW.
(hi :3)
okay so. OKAY SO. im going to go feral give me a second. my first impression of him was a campus interaction when i didnt know who the fuck a ritsu was and i literally called him a stalker oops. BUT HES NOT HE IS SIMPLY GATHERING INTEL (auburn is being an apologist again...)
he's in sinostra so of course he's a little unhinged but not in the way one would typically be unhinged. i mean that he doesn't waver even when guns are being pointed at his head and his life is being threatened. like even with his stigma that would probably freak someone out!! but not him!! because hes CRAZY.
he's also super dedicated to his work which is just so (❤´艸`❤) yk?? he's DEPENDABLE which is a huge thing for me. hes RELIABLE and SMART and REALLY STRONG. i need to eat him. gnaw on him like a chew toy. HES SO UNBOTHERED TOO. WHILE ALSO MANAGING TO BE THE MOST BOTHERED. just dont insult his handwriting or sunglasses and you'll be fine.
he's so meticulous and organized too...he actually motivates me to be more on top of things because even if my world is falling apart that doesn't mean my work stops 〒▽〒 ANYWAYS! not to sound like a pick me but OH I WOULD BE A BETTER BUSINESS PARTNER THAN MC. like i love her and im certain ritsu appreciates her too but she is way too meek and insecure it makes me sad :(( like i want her to be able to speak up and tell ritsu when she sees something because that would genuinely save SO MUCH TIME when the two of them are out doing something, its like ritsu is doing all the work and shes just standing by.
during chapter four i genuinely did grow to feel safe with ritsu around. sinostra is not my vibe at ALL but idk when you're by his side you just feel like everything is gonna be okay. and i dont think thats a universal experience considering the amount of people that hate him but im glad for it regardless!!
he also cannot take COMPLIMENTS hes always like "oooo this is nothing special this is expected blah blah blah" HUSH. YOU ARE IMPRESSIVE. YOU ARE SMART. YOU ARE CLEVER. YOUR EFFORT IS PAYING OFF. YOU ARE WONDERFUL AND I LOVE YOU. STOP BEING SO MODEST AND YET SO SMUG AT THE SAME TIME. I LOVE YOU. BASHES OUR HEADS TOGETHER.
6 notes
·
View notes