#ty again for tagging me!! this was a lot of fun <33< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[birdietrait]

OCS as OBSCURE ASSOCIATIONS

with miss winifred conway herself <3 ty for tagging me @rottengurlz!!

ANIMAL: deer !!

COLORS: dark green, blush pink

MONTH: january or february

SONGS: i know the end - phoebe bridgers, forwards beckon rebound - adrianne lenker, blues run the game - jackson c. frank

NUMBER: 7 or 12

PLANTS: dried daisies and queen anne's lace

SMELLS: books, honey, earth

GEMSTONE: bayldonite

TIME OF DAY: 7am

SEASON: late winter / early spring

PLACES: deep in a forest, a bed tucked in a corner, a rocky creek

FOOD: bichon au citron

DRINKS: peach lemonade, green tea w lemon + honey

ELEMENT: earth

ASTROLOGICAL SIGN: cancer (even though she's an aquarius)

SEASONINGS: saffron

SKY: golden hour, sunset

WEATHER: chilly + light rain

MAGICAL POWER: clairvoyance

WEAPONS: fingernails

SOCIAL MEDIA: .....pinterest

MAKEUP PRODUCT: brown mascara

CANDY: tootsie roll

METHOD OF LONG DISTANCE TRAVEL: walking + hitchhiking

ART STYLE: pointillism

FEAR: fear of the unknown, fear of drowning, fear of death

MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: ceryneian hind

PIECE OF STATIONARY: crumpled paper from a sketchbook

THREE EMOJIS: 🦷🪡🍂💽🪟 (couldn’t pick just 3)

CELESTIAL BODY: the moon

[anystalker707]

Dolled up [2/2]

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x [male, amab] Reader Summary: Sanji wants another encounter with you. Tags: He wears pretty lingeries / Demanding, but he's a bottom / He's gets eaten out / Just a princess / a PILLOW princess

Requested by anon [I LOVE how you wrote ‘dolled up’ with sanji and i was wondering if you could do part 2 to that? If not then just another sanji x top male readers fine! You don’t have to do it btw! Ty and have an awesome day!] A/n: thanks sm for your request <33 i hope you have a great day, dear!

[PART 1]

MASTERLIST

          Sanji had noticed your persistent presence and gaze upon him. You eyed him differently after he showed up in your cabin for a midnight surprise, as if you were all the time picturing him wearing that lingerie under his normal clothes. There was something else, but he couldn’t quite get what it was.

Were you trying to figure something out about him? Studying him? He wasn’t really sure about it, but he didn’t feel like facing it directly. Some sort of superiority had been granted to Sanji the moment he found out how lost you were for him, and he wouldn’t throw it all away now. He loved the way your breath would hitch whenever he reached for something on the higher parts of the cabinets, making his shirt ride up just enough… It was good knowing he had such power.

“Excuse me,” you whispered, suddenly popping Sanji out of his bubble of thoughts and placing the ground under his feet again. Your hands were firm around his waist, gently moving him to the side so that you could walk past him and grab something from the fridge. He couldn’t even focus, mind going blank the moment your hands grabbed his waist and set him aside, so he looked down and let his hair fall more over his face in the hope it would cover his blush. Thankfully, you didn’t notice anything.

Sanji wanted the attention so badly, but he also didn’t want to be the one to give in first. This feeling bubbled up under his skin as the days passed; a presentment, though he didn’t know what for. At least until it was time for his night watch, that is.

Everything needed to be in the right measurement, and it lacked something, though Sanji wasn’t sure what. A quiet hum escaped his lips as he licked the sauce from his finger, shifting his weight to one of his legs with a soft sigh. He was a little sleepy and tired, but it was nothing he couldn’t endure. With a sigh, he was about to reach for a jar when he stopped midway.

Arms wrapped warmly around Sanji’s waist, soon accompanied by a presence behind him. It didn’t take him a lot of thought to know who it was, and his heart fluttered at the same moment.

“Doll,” you whispered right next to Sanji’s ear, making his skin rise in shivers at the same time it heated up. “My princess.”

“Yours?” Sanji whispered back almost too quickly, in a mocking tone. He wasn’t reaching for the jar anymore, only resting both of his hands on the countertop this time. The fact you were there, finally interacting directly with him and touching him without restraints, somehow managed to calm down a tension that bubbled up inside him previously. It melted away in a pleasing feeling that still carried an anxious edge.

“Of course,” you whispered with a soft chuckle, nuzzling the crook of Sanji’s neck and having fun with the way his skin rose in shivers. “I thought I’d claim you before anyone else. Am I so wrong for doing that, or did I get the wrong message? Were you just using me the other day?”

Sanji couldn’t help but sigh at your assumptions, pausing as he glanced back to raise an eyebrow at you before he shook his head to himself. Your gaze remained the same before his vague response.

“You’re difficult,” Sanji muttered, smirking at the way you gasped in offense.

“Oh, I’m the difficult one here?” You clicked your tongue and kissed Sanji’s shoulder through his shirt, inhaling the cologne he used—it was floral, in soft notes that could be caught under the smell of cigarettes and something else, stronger on the back of his neck. Also through the thin fabric of his button-up, your fingers worked on his waist, caressing and looking for something. “You’ve been avoiding me the whole week. Do you know how lonely I’ve been?”

Sanji felt a sense of pride swell in his chest at the fact that you recognized his distance—that you missed his presence and felt miserable because of that. He exhaled, smiling. “Oh? So were you having fun with your hand instead?”

“Why would I when I have you?” You scoffed, and your words sent a sparkle down Sanji’s spine that ended in the warmth that started forming in his lower stomach. His cheeks heated up a little, and he had to look down, trying to contain the smile that fought to form on his face. “Or are you bored? Maybe I just got the wrong idea.” Your touch became lighter at the same moment you paused, but Sanji promptly placed his hands over yours and tugged on your hands to wrap your arms tighter around his torso while he leaned back against you, with his head on your shoulder. It was enough to have your heart going wild in your chest.

“Don’t be silly.” Sanji chuckled, turning his head enough to plant a kiss on your cheek.

A smile stretched across your face according to how you relaxed, tightening your arms around him before nuzzling the crook of his neck with a soft hum. Sanji’s fingers laced with yours, warm palms pressed to the back of your hands as he relaxed into your touches, sighing softly. It was nice to just be with him like that; your heart felt out of place with the unusual amount of happiness it felt, almost making you feel dizzy while pulling Sanji closer, wanting more of him.

Sanji gasped barely audibly as he felt your grip tighten around him, your forearms sinking just under his ribs, but still let you have that moment before he turned around to face you with his arms around your neck. “You know, I was kinda waiting for you,” he whispered as his index finger traced circles into your shoulder.

The new tone made you raise an eyebrow, studying Sanji’s apparently innocent expression as he eyed you from under his eyelashes with that small smile tugging on his lips. It was hard to resist, making something stir in your lower stomach, even more so when his fingers pressed to the back of your neck and rubbed against the skin soothingly. Since when did he have such power over you…? Well, it didn’t matter at the moment; you kept looking into his visible blue eye while he smiled and leaned in.

A familiar taste of lip balm was present on Sanji’s lips, which gave you an idea of the whereabouts of your lost lip balm, hinting at the bearings of your favorite shirt and a ring. Either way, every other thought aside from Sanji himself was erased from your mind the moment he deepened the kiss and tugged on your bottom lip with his teeth. His eyes were half-lidded, eyeing you with entertainment and the full knowledge of what he was doing.

“My dear, mon amour,” he mumbled against your lips in a soft pleading tone that you couldn’t resist.

          Nothing would happen if you two left the night watch for a while, right? You two weren’t near any island, in the first place, and it would be hard seeing Sunny in the dark, so there was nothing to worry about. The thoughts were buried in the back of your mind by the time you climbed on top of Sanji and pressed your lips to his, feeling the mattress shift under your knees as you opened up a space between his legs.

Sanji’s breath escaped his throat in short intervals that were permeated by gasps for air whenever there was a small break from the kisses. His arms wrapped around your neck, holding you closer as his legs wrapped around your waist, and he arched his back, sending both of you groaning when your hips ground together.

Aside from knowing his way around, Sanji knew you, and maybe a little too well. He knew which way he had to kiss you to have you whimpering into his mouth, and kept kissing you until you ran out of air. Entertainment played in his eyes while observing you try to catch your breath, faces just centimeters away from each other. There was a soft hum as he caressed your cheeks with gentle fingers before kissing your lips in a soft kiss that didn’t last longer than a couple of seconds.

You sat back on your legs, bottom lip between your teeth while your fingers carefully unbuttoned his shirt, slowly letting his torso come into view, all while Sanji lay there as if you were just doing the bare minimum for him. A small smile remained on his lips as he observed you, and you couldn’t help but get a little lost in him. He looked so beautiful like that, hair messy, hands above his head, cheeks with a light red tone…

A sigh escaped your lips as you finally pulled the light blue fabric away and there was a lingerie top you’d never seen before. The bralette was made of a thin and soft peach-colored lace with white satin details.

“Sanji,” you practically moaned, pressing a kiss to the exposed skin on his chest above the bra and below the delicate silver chain he used around his neck with a small gem as a pendant. You thought about gifting him a pendant with the initial of your first name so that he could use it around his neck, but you decided to keep it as a mental note for later, focusing on how his soft skin felt under your lips.

Sanji’s chest rose and fell with a deep sigh, and he hummed in response to your touches, placing a hand on the back of your head to gently caress your hair and keep you close. A soft groan escaped your lips as you started nipping on his skin with firm hands around his waist, holding tightly as if to pull him even closer because it just wasn’t possible to get enough of him.

You nuzzled into Sanji’s bra, tugging on it just enough to expose his nipple so that you could latch your lips around it. As his nipple slowly hardened under your touch, Sanji whimpered, placing more pressure on the back of your head, so you complied—your tongue ran around the bud before you started sucking on it with a soft groan, relishing how Sanji’s moans grew louder once you started using your teeth.

“Fuck,” Sanji groaned as he arched his back, only relaxing back against the bed when you finally let go of his chest with a final lick across his nipple. His face was a brighter shade of red now, and his pupils were blown—your cock twitched the moment his eyes met yours, and you started moving again.

It was messy, but Sanji still helped you get undressed, taking off your shirt while you unbuckled your belt, but he didn’t undress himself, no. He waited for you to do it, going to the maximum of helping you a little by lifting his body off the bed, nothing more.

“I see you like my lingerie,” Sanji said with a sense of pride, grinning wide.

You paused and just raised an eyebrow at Sanji, without giving him much attention to his statement—it was obvious you liked his lacy garments, the way they suited his body so perfectly and gave him an extra touch of delicacy. It made you infatuated, clouding your thoughts whenever you looked at him or thought about him wearing them.

“You planned this?” You raised an eyebrow, slipping your hands under his panties so that you could cup his ass cheeks. “Or do you just go around wearing lingerie on a daily basis, princess?”

Sanji couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his lips, cupping your face lovingly. “Yes to both. The thing is that I like wearing the special ones for you.”

You smiled, sighing while giving his ass a squeeze—he moaned in response, arching his back as his legs wrapped around your waist again, but his cock met no friction, much to his displeasure. “So pretty,” you breathed and kissed along Sanji’s shoulder while your fingers kneaded on the fat of his ass until soft whimpers escaped his lips, though it wasn’t much of a hard task.

Reluctantly, you pulled a hand away from Sanji to reach for the lube in the bedside table, quickly retrieving it.

“On your stomach,” you said with a soft slap on his thigh, which caused him to groan softly before he turned over, allowing you to adjust a pillow under his hips. He was such a princess, indeed, a fucking pillow princess who didn’t want to do any work today, but you didn’t mind. You’d manhandle him around if he wanted to.

You knelt between Sanji’s spread legs, taking a while to observe him, taking note of the contrast between the delicate clothes and his muscular fame, his plump ass. How could he be so perfect? A soft sigh escaped your lips as you pressed a kiss to his lower back before gently tugging his panties to the side, just enough to expose his hole, while you tugged on one of his butt cheeks.

The cold lube fell against the warm skin, making Sanji gasp and squirm a little in anticipation, glancing over his shoulder to take a look at you, but your focus was somewhere else. Your thumb circled his fluttering entrance, spreading the lube around and earning yourself a quiet sound from Sanji that stretched itself for longer when your thumb pressed past the ring of muscles, spreading the wetness into his hole.

“Mmph, darling,” Sanji whispered as he arched his back a little bit, attempting to push his hips back into your finger, but it wasn’t of much use; your goal wasn’t to please him yet, just to spread the lube. He grabbed one of your pillows to hug, folding it in half to also give his face a good place to rest.

Silence filled the room for a moment, but it was just a matter of seconds before Sanji let out another quiet sound. His hole twitched when your tongue pressed to it, tasting the sweetness of the lube along with Sanji’s taste itself. It took a while, but he finally started relaxing, groaning into the pillow as your tongue lapped at him. Since there weren’t many opportunities in which you could have privacy with anyone on the ship—or even had the time for it—, you took your time licking along his hole, pressing your tongue flat to the fluttering skin without enough strength to actually penetrate him.

Sanji’s whimpers were muffled, but not inaudible, loud enough to reach your ears and make the arousal rise within you. Finally, though, your lips were closed around the flushed entrance and sucking with enough intensity to draw a moan from him.

“Good,” Sanji whispered, though cutting himself off when he felt your tongue finally pushing inside him, lapping at his insides in a very welcome intrusion. He tightened his fingers around the pillow, arching his back as he sought more pleasure, which you seemed very eager to provide him. Not only your tongue, but the way your hands kept a firm grip on his ass and the back of his thigh also had him melting, cock twitching and leaking inside the tight panties.

The consistent rhythm of the shallow thrusts of your tongue was enough to cloud Sanji’s thoughts, making him start getting lost in the pleasure you were able to provide him. He whimpered and hugged the pillow closer to himself when your tongue glided inside him just the right way.

Despite the pleasure that it brought both of you, your jaw started complaining about the straining; a sharp pain started tugging on your muscles until you were forced to pull back, moving your chin from side to side in a small massage while eyeing his glistening hole.

Sanji didn’t have time for complaining before your tongue was replaced by a couple of fingers; he let out a long, dragged moan while his hips squirmed under your touch, and he didn’t seem to mind the replacement. His skin rose in shivers at the same time his walls tightened around your fingers when your lips ran along his ass cheek, kissing and nipping on the soft skin at the same time your fingers worked at a slow pace inside him.

Your cock was painfully hard, dripping between your legs, but your desire to keep satisfying Sanji like that was bigger than the will to indulge in your own needs. Soft moans came from Sanji as he squirmed, arching his back and almost getting off the position if you weren’t holding him in place, though he became more still when your tongue worked along the rim of his hole as your fingers reached deep inside him. His breath hitched, and with the way he squeezed around you, it was obvious he was close.

The moans that came from Sanji were louder and longer until a particular one caught in his throat, and he came, slick walls clenching around your fingers until they were spasming with the afterglow, and he whimpered at how the overstimulation threatened to take over.

You would give him a break first, but your curiosity got the best of you; before Sanji could even catch his breath, you were making him turn over and tugging on the waistband of his panties. The sight was mouthwatering, and your cock ached as it throbbed more. Sanji’s cock was still half hard, messily covered in fresh cum and confined inside those small panties.

“Fuck, I’m down bad for you,” you moaned.

.𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟.

[azullumi]

hiii! i dont know how to say this but i just love the way you write so much ヾ(•ω•`)o, if you take requests (if not you can just ignore this) i would like to request some headcanons of wanderer who is in an established relationship with a reader who suffers from chronic insomnia. since he is a puppet and doesn't need sleep, it would be fun to know the things he would do when keeping the reader company and helping them fall asleep! thank you very much for yor amazing writing!! (o゜▽゜)o☆

details — sleep is essential especially to mortals like you, that is one fact that he understood.

pairing — wanderer/gender-neutral reader

tags — fluff, established relationship ; headcanons

words — 753

note — a short one to cure my soul and ty so much anon!! that means a lot to me :)) i’m glad u love my writing <33 also just letting you all know that requests are open and i'm trying to prioritize them first.

“can’t sleep?” the toss and turning of your figure in the bed—quite frustrated in motion even—accompanied with the occasional groans gave him the idea that you weren’t asleep, or couldn’t sleep at all. a simple nod coming from you was all he needed before his mind started constructing ideas on what he can do to accompany you on yet another night like this.

he’s not new to it, certainly. after all, before you were lovers, you two were friends and he wasn’t a stranger to this problem of yours. however, when he was first introduced to it, he didn’t know what to do and what he could do to help you. he just let you talk about your experience with this conundrum, listening and silently noting the fact in his mind.

and before he knew it, he started to come up with plans for the night in case you have trouble falling asleep once again. it all just felt natural to him, he started buying items that he thinks could aid you even if it’s just for a bit—tea that has sleep benefits, any book that he comes across that he thinks you could use, a board or card game that you two can play. although god forbids that the game being played would end up in a friendly match. with his somewhat of a competitive and taunting personality, the small match becomes a tournament between you and him.

it either ends up with you becoming sleepy and him having to carry you to bed as you doze in his arms or staying up all night ‘til the rise of the sun as you try to beat each other into defeat.

although he doesn’t want to admit to you that he’s really looking out for you. he doesn’t want to say that just the simple mention of sleep and anything to related to that would have his mind drifting to the thought of you, it’s like you and sleep itself is just associated with one another–despite the fact that you lack of it. and in all honesty, isn’t this what you’re supposed to do to your cherished ones?

and when you two had established a romantic relationship with one another, the things he would do for you soon became more intimate and affectionate. accompanying and talking while sitting across each other soon became cuddling sessions in bed—he occasionally plays with your hair or provides soothing touches on your skin—, massages from him are being offered to help you relax, and you try things together often.

he becomes quite strict on things related to your well-being, as health and sleep are correlated to one another. such as coffee being forbidden especially when it’s being taken during the night or having naps during the day limited so that you won’t be awake the whole time later on.

“sleep is essential.” he tells you rather flatly as if it’s not something that you don’t know, his fingers combing through your hair and massaging your scalp in the process. you don’t know what time it is right now, perhaps sometime around dawn as the night looks darker and quieter with only the rustling of leaves outside the window being heard.

“but you don’t sleep?” you answered, words close to a mutter as you slowly eased into his hold and kind caress, the gentle rhythm of his breathing and his voice served as a lullaby. “i do not need it.” his answer elicits a confused reaction from you, eyebrows drawn into one as you look up to meet his gaze, eyes that were often in a glare are warm and soft.

you asked him, “why?” in which he responds, benignly, “i’m a puppet, have you forgotten about that?”

he bought you a stuffed toy—one that resembles him in some manner with its grumpy expression and a small hat on top of its head, donning colors that are similar to his. it wouldn’t be surprising if you were the one who got it for yourself but the fact that he went out his way to get a cotton figure (of him) definitely astonished you to the core.

it doesn’t matter if you have asked him for help about it or not, he only wishes you to know that he is there for you. his affection for you goes past the line of simply just admiring you and memorizing every line of your face, he cares for you more than you know and more than what he makes you realize.

© azullumi — do not plagiarize, copy, repost, nor translate any of my works.

[dalkyeom]

— Chia! Chia! Chia’s Follow Forever

First of all, thank you so much for following me on my art journey! I wanted to do this when I hit 250 but suddenly there are nearly 300 of you and I need to do this before I hit 350 ;;; hehe don’t worry I’ll be doing another drawing/art related event soon

Believe it or not this is my first follow forever I’ve ever done and I’ve been here since my seedling years pls laugh at my joke /jk but I’m hoping it won’t be my last. I’m really happy with how this blog turned out bc I’ve met a lot of wonderful people on here since its creation (even if it was originally just to escape this hellsite’s basement for the lovely crime of constantly talking about Bang Chan)

Thank you so much again!! If this post is kinda long, I mayhaps went overboard with the blog recs (+ some messages to my friends/moots) but I would really love for them to receive love too so go go check them out!

a special section for my loveliest friends bc you make my stay on this site worthwhile. Also you’re a bunch of sweet people who make the most banger creations!! My social battery isn’t always the highest but I appreciate every interaction we have

@chanluster — Fia queen you’re probably gonna see this when you come back but I’ll never ever forget you as my first Stayblr friend. You’re crazy talented and you’re also so much fun to talk to and I love our conversations to no ends. Wherever you are I hope you’re having the best time and definitely we need to start writing our anti-hero skz fic soon!

@decembermoonskz , @sulfurcosmos — two of the sweetest stayblr writers whose works also blew me away 🥺 will never ever forget how your writings transported me to a world away from this one and live different lives each time. I find it cute how you both are also my assigned moon and star friends (izzy moon and starry ti) and you always leave the sweetest messages in the tags and asks :(( ty always for warming my heart

@chanstopher — my Chris loving era would never be the same without you! Even if it has quieted down to a mellow humm, I always go to you if I need anything skz related (Chan bubble updates and gifs of Chan’s Room especially) also somehow you really embody a compass! You’re always so kind and helpful to those around you, you make everyone feel so welcomed and I’m glad that I’m one of them (also idk if I ever told you but I was the anon asking where you buy pcs from lol) also I’m glad that being able to know you led me to another ult of mine; our beloved 13 shining diamonds bc if it was not for your beautiful Cheol gifs I probably wouldn’t have associated him with you = I won’t be as interested to check them out. Love you lots, Dreamy!! sending you all the twinkling night stars in the sky 🥰

@dokyeomblr and @aceofvernons — my precious elv and xanthe, i’m so glad to have the honor to call you my caratblr friends. You’ve both been nothing but welcoming and kind to me (and reblog the cutest games haha!) also tysm for gracing my dash always with treasures you find off caratblr. Always holding you both in the kyeom kyeom and bonon loving hours circle

@otlwoozi — oliveeer! Naur was so shocked to learn you were also @badhapple ‘s bc I adore your svt art when I see it make rounds on twt. I’m glad to see you around here too and I hope we get to interact lots more as well bc it’s been super fun when I read your tags hahaha and sharing svt - related dreams as well (manifesting you get more aside from the concert ones)

@ravixen @thepixelelf @leejungchans and @97-liners — another set of my favorite writers on this site and aaa— amg I find you all so cool, I’m glad to call you my caratblr friends as well <33 you writings always make me fall for ot13 deeper (amg especially for DOKYEOM AND SHUA MY BRAINROT NOW KNOWS NO BOUNDS! I am kissing your beautiful minds!) it’s always a pleasure drawing for you. If I had extra unlimited energy I would draw more and more bc your fics always serve as an inspiration

@lawleighette and @scoups-ofsuga — my cottage/outskirts friends oms it’s fun how we became a trio just recently but being your friend has been so much fun. Even if our convos are all over the place I’m glad that we’re strengthened by the bonon memes! And also some of the coolest artists ever like ??? sometimes I question why you were following me in the first place? I adore you lots though like you’re both my younger siblings <33 sending all the mwah mwahs and vernon memes later!

@shinstars @fenori and @zzzbookwormzzz — the og team! THE OG TEAM! It’s a wonder how we managed to stay connected for 5+ years like you’ve really seen it all. We still need to meet up at a cafe and draw together and that will be my lifelong wish granted! (you too Fenbro, tho we did went to a museum-cafe date already and it’s the most priceless memory I have this year) I love you three so much!!

@bedtimetelevision @mitchievousness and carloo (pls send help I forgot her tumblr) — my best friends in the entire world :(( I miss you guys everyday I hope we can see each other soon. I love you the most in the world even if our social batteries are the most whack! Lmao I live for our life updates every birthday. I hope we can do more adventures together when I get back there!! Love you love you love you more than 3000

to my anonies, I still think about you every day :(( especially Ash anon and 💝 anon (amg it’s been awhile since I went on my mocimori blog so I’m no longer sure if it was 💖 or 💝) and special mention @that-crazy-five-foot-two-chick tysm for sending me kind messages when I’m feeling down or simply to tell me you appreciate my art! They really make my days brighter <33 pspsps’ing my other nonnies without a siggy as well. I appreciate you guys sm!

My wonderful moots and friends from twitter! I hope to see you around here too:

@burabin @ilyarawan @remimilktea @wrenkkai @brwlvs @meiseos @kitsuunemi @silyue @champourado @goyangiprince @b3lchii @theooo-saurus @noisyspiritart @heartboiled-egg @shiohh

Special mention to these cc’s whose posts also never fail to brighten up my dash with svt-related content:

@shuatonin // @woozi // @97chwe // @injunnies // @caratonce // @scoups

[spaceyflowers]

HI ADRIEN!!! I hope you’re having a lovely day so far. 😩💓 TY FOR ALWAYS REBLOGGING, I LOVE YOUR TAGS AND I LOVE RRADING THE COMMENTS YOU HAVE. 🥰🥰🥰 I have a few questions for you, from a fellow writer! 😎🙌🏽

If you were to be sucked into the Lookism webtoon, what would your character be in the story?

Adding onto the first question as a Lookism character, who would be your main allies/friends and who would be your main enemies/foes? 😳

What is your favorite romance trope? 👀

Who is your favorite Lookism character to write for/write about?

Do you listen to music while writing/drawing? And if so, what do you listen to?

I hope this isn’t too much to ask. If it is, I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE. 😬🙏🏽 Wishing you a good rest of your day!! 😘

AWW HI CAT AKA FELLOW WRITER B] + OFC!! I HAVE "UNABLE TO SHUT UP" DISEASE SO IM GLAD U ALWAYS APPRECIATE MY WORDS 😭💖💖 (also apologies for answering this semi-late 💔)

speaking of my disease i went on quite a bit so im putting a cut after my first reply <3

my life in the lookism webtoon: realistically, i think i would be one of the j high student background charas who say funny one liners whenever humor is needed and then im never seen again JSHDJWJD

but if im allowed to be delusional then i want to be a member of big deal that plays an older sibling role to them like jake/sinu does 🫶 i think it'd also be nice to befriend some of the j high kids unknowingly lol

like i can imagine the j high trio showing up during the big deal vs workers arc and spotting me, going "hey, you're the nice person we meet at the cafe sometimes! you're a member of big deal?! you said you worked at a convenience store!" and im just like "well... i do work at a convenience store. on big deal's street. you guys never asked"

and ofc this means my main enemies would be gun, eugene/workers, and prob dg ^_^

fave romance trope: friends to lovers bc im such a sappy soft loser 🤞 also,, i was really sad when i saw u, day, and jann talking about friends to lovers being a bland trope a while ago but i understand 😭😭 i was going to say sumn but didnt want to be the "um ACTUALLY" guy 😭😭😭

anyways all i have to offer for what i had wanted to say is this 💔:

fave lookism chara to write for/about: hm... kind of a hard choice, but ironically i think it's probably my writing blog's top requested 3: james, gun, and jake. they're all starkly different compared to each other lol but their unique personalities are fun to write!! vin jin's also pretty fun to write bc of how obnoxious he is <3

listening to music while writing/drawing: YES MUSIC IS MY LIFE I WOULD BE LIFELESS WITHOUT IT 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #1 MUSIC ENTHUSIAST FOREVER ‼️ (thus why i am always asking for music reccs lol)

i listen to a wide variety of stuff in many languages!! indie, vocaloid, pop, jazz, rock, etc... unfortunately i am also the "i listen to every genre :] not country tho." guy and im not a fan of super heavy metal either u_u;;

most of the time i listen to whatever i want to fit the mood of what im working on! and since i usually work on romantic stuff (lol) that means ive usually got a romantic playlist/song on loop ^_^

ik this wasnt asked but here's a recc from me to you: finding something to do by hellogoodbye 💖 (this song makes me think of going on a fun road trip with a crush!)

OKAY THAT'S ALL dw about the question amount i had lots of fun answering them <33 !! i hope you have a very lovely day youself, cat!! (⁠*⁠˘⁠︶⁠˘⁠*⁠)⁠.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡

[aceofvernons]

ult group question game

rules: answer the questions based on your ult group

i was tagged by the ever wonderful @momobani ty for the tag <333 i am. unfortunately guilty of being a solo stan so seventeen is my default ✌️😔

tagging @seokmins @junkissed-replies @nu-replies @minghao-s @caratonce @dalkyeom @chogiwapadada and anyone else who wants to do it!!!

who was your first bias?

it was s.coups! i still like him a lot (and i love all the other members don't worry), but i could never be as insane about him as some of my friends who are stans.

2. who is your bias now?

it's vernon. like, if you take 5 seconds to look at my blog, being INSANE about him is sort of (really) my brand LMAO

3. what was the first MV you watched from them?

ooh, that's a really good question. i'd have to say home;run? it's also the song that got me into seventeen in the first place, so it definitely has a close place in my heart <3

4. what's your favorite MV?

oh, now that's a REALLY good question. i think it's the one for oh my!, i love svt's darker concepts a lot but i tend to favor their cuter or lighter ones and it's so delightful as well.

5. if you could listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be?

i think it would be home? it's such a soft song and also interesting enough that i think it would keep me hooked. 6. who would you want to see them collab with?

*sweats in solo stan* i uh, do not know. i only listen to the music of other groups casually so i don't really know enough about other groups </333 7. what MV concept do you want to see them do?

i mentioned this before but i love the cuter/lighter ones they do! it would be so fun to see them do a playful one again, let them have fun with it and be the absolute chaos men they are <3

8. have you ever had a dream with any of the members in it?

oh this is hilarious because i do have a few from time to time, but most of them fade EXCEPT for one. i had a dream that i was fighting with mingyu for a pint of seventeen themed ice cream and you know, i was doing pretty good considering that this man is twice my size and is HELLA buff. it's a classic case of an immovable object (mingyu) vs an unstoppable force (me).

9. if you could spend a day with one member, who would it be and what would you do?

extremely predictable of me, but i'd love to hang out with vernon! just chat, hang out, get some food, i think he would he a really cool person to talk to. i'd love to get a better understanding of his perspective of the world, since we're both the kinds of people who like to broaden our horizons and understand other people more.

10. which member do you think you'd get along best with?

i think it would be hoshi!! his high energy would rub off on me and we would both be a pair of chaotic menaces with not a single brain cell between us <33

11. which member do you think you would argue with?

maybe not *argue* but someone i think i could see myself having fun banter with seungkwan, he really reminds me of my irl childhood best friend and we need to be the fruitiest people in the room or else (/j)

12. if you had to choose one member to scroll through your tumblr, who would it be?

yet another good question because i'm really a fairly private person and the thought of having one of them look through my blog makes me want to throw myself out a window. but! i'm letting minghao do it because he is the least likely to care. if he doesn't know me then he hopefully won't judge me too hard.

[spacexcowgirl]

Hi Rose!!! 🫐 and 🍈 for the ask game pls <33

hi em!! ty :)

🫐 What’s your favorite underrated thing in your fandom? (A ship that only you seem to write for, a character there’s almost no fics about, a trope that criminally hasn’t been written yet, etc.)

okay so. I haven’t posted for this ship and I think no one will agree with me but this is probably my time to come out as… a prongsfoot shipper. I have read like every fic under the tag on ao3. I have ranted to maggie about why they work. I have felt the shame of even considering them.

they’re certainly not my favorite pairing together, and they’re one of those ships that a lot of the time, I don’t really see working out in the long run, but it can be so fun. really this all just comes down to the fact that I am first and foremost a friends to lovers girlie, and if done well, they can be so good.

I think it comes down to like a lot of people really love and relate to regulus, and then can see him in various pairings. and while I love him, i’m not sure I relate to him? so I struggle when he’s in any other ship bc i’m like wait. no. it has to be jeg. so on the flip, i’m kinda down to read james with anyone? like will entertain almost any of it. idk if that makes sense? essentially I just love james and am happy to read him in most pairings bc im still reading him.

otherwise I think ravenclaw barty is pretty underrated and enjoy when I see that occasionally!

🍈 Who’s your blorbo and what are some of your favorite headcanons/ideas about them that repeatedly show up in your fics? Free pass to rant about blorbo opinions.

mmm james. always james.

i’m trying to think of specific things I include about him in all of my fics though.

I always see him as desi, even if I don’t tag it bc it doesn’t come up. but in both of my long fics, it is tagged, and ive specifically dived a bit into what state in india his family was from, bits of their culture, traditional foods, etc. the only time ive ever been out of north america was when I went to India when I was 14? 15? so i’ve really enjoyed like showcasing a bit of desi james beyond just saying he’s desi.

otherwise, I don’t really subscribe to the sunshine headcanon? i’ve used metaphors about the sun before, bc they’re easy lmao, but he is not like. this always happy always perfect guy. in fact he is like, usually a major fuck up in my fics. and I think that’s good! let him make his mistakes, yanno?

idk if any of this makes sense or if it’s all too long but ty for the asks again <3

fic writer asks

[ushijimacentral]

mmmm ok for ur ask game…….. my response is kei + autumn + walking around a carnival together

ty bestie mwah <33

tysm for the ask <3

game details are here if you're interested in participating

alrighty here we go!

summary: y/n and tsukishima spend the evening at the carnival

tags/warnings: drabble, fem!reader, fluff

a/n: sadly I haven't been to a fair/carnival since i lived in Michigan but i remember it being absolutely amazing. also the lengths I had to go to not include strawberries in this fic...

[8:52 PM] - Tsukishima

It was finally autumn. The weather has cooled down a lot and the fair was finally in town. You had begged Tsukishima to take you before he finally relented, after all, he hadn't been able to spend much time with you since he'd been busy practicing. Now you were at the fair gates in your specially picked outfit scanning the crowd.

"Kei!" You squealed as you took off towards your boyfriend. You crashed into him grabbing him into a tight hug. He slowly wrapped his arms around you while muttering something about ruining his reputation. However, you noticed the little upturns in the corners of his mouth as he tried to stifle his smile. "Well since you're finally here, we might as well get going." He took your hand. "Next time don't take so long, you always look good so I don't see why you needed all that extra time." You felt heat rush to your cheeks. "Well it's extra special so I needed extra time." He clicked his tongue. "C'mon, let's start off with some games."

The first game you got to was a ring toss, and despite you insisting that it was a scam, he quickly gave the vendor 5 of his tickets and received his three rings. "Are you sure about this Kei? I'm pretty sure it's just a scam." You whispered. He chuckled at you before waving over the vendor. "If you don't mind sir, could you take down the dinosaur one?" The shopkeeper turned to him. "You have to land the ring on the red bottle in the middle first." Kei shrugged. "Just thought I'd save you the trouble." He held all three rings together in his hand before tossing them smoothly onto the red bottle. Flashing the shopkeeper a cocky grin, he wordlessly took the plushy and left the stand, forcing you to jog and catch up to him.

"What was that?" You asked incredulously. "Oh that? Just me winning is all." You shook your head and reached out to pat the T-Rex, only to be swatted by Tsukishima. "Hey, you do not have permission to molest my friend Mortimer you pervert." You choked. Who names a stuffed T-Rex Mortimer? "I'll get you your own at the next stand but this one is mine." He muttered, looking in the direction of the ferris wheel. "Let's go on a couple rides first before we eat then." You suggested.

And that's how you found yourselves in line for the space shot. "The infamous ride that takes you to an unsettling height and then drops you." Kei read from a blog on his phone. "Put that down. You're gonna ruin all the fun." You protested. Before you knew it, Mortimer was stowed away in the storage locker and the two of you were being buckled in on the right side of your row. "Scared Kei?" He scoffed in reply, but you couldn't help but notice the small beads of sweat forming on his brow line. The ride clicked and then began lifting you slowly up into the air. You were beginning to get excited when you noticed Kei grab your hand, it was cold and clammy. The ride reached the top and he turned to you. "Hey [Y/N], I don't think this is a good-" His concerns were quickly drowned out by his screams. He shrieked louder than the child next to you. The ride let you fall down and you saw the ground getting closer and closer as Kei tightened his grip on your arm. But the ride did end and Tsukishima shakily climbed out. "I am never doing that again."

You bought him a slushy and funnel cake to cheer him up. He had forgiven you by the end of his second ice cream cone and the two of you proceeded to go on rides more his speed. On the ferris wheel, the two of you got a good look over the city line. You scooted closer to him and held his hand. "I love you," You whispered. "Hm?" His usual sarcastic tone had found itself at home again.

"I didn't quite hear you, could you repeat a little louder."

"Ugh, you're annoying."

"It's not my fault I couldn't hear."

"Fine, I love y-"

Your words were cut short by him pressing a quick kiss to your lips. As he pulled away, he whispered "I love you more stupid."

[les-mys]

nearly forgor this one, ty for tagging me silly ! <33

Last Song: Ceasar on a Tv Screen by The Last Dinner Party

Favourite Colour: Red !!!

Last Movie/Tv Show: uhhhhh, was rewatching Avatar:The Last Airbender for like the 20th time I think

Sweet/Spicy/Savoury: Sweet for sure :]

Relationship Status: v single :P not really bothered about it tho :P

Last Thing I Googled: Where Tadley is in the Uk, was a bit confused abt it so

Current Obsession: in terms of, like, media(?) I've been watching a lot of random fact videos, been v fun :>

Last Book: Magnus Chase and the Hammer of Thor, like halfway through it rn

Looking Forward To: Going to my cousin's wedding tomorrow :DD

I dont know how to bold things 😭😭

and again @spaceyaceylesbian @v-o-i-d-p-u-n-k @drabbles-n-doodles @idkanameatall @ashyfur-524 @oh-peacemaker-oh-warmonger (I'm pretty sure I'm moots with all of you guys)

zero pressure sillies <33 anyone else i cant think of rn can join too obvs :]]]] !!

I was tagged by @paellegere and @homosneksual! ty and sorry it took so long for me to get to!

Last Song: I Can Still Make Cheyenne by George Strait

Favorite Color: yellow but also i love them all

Last Movie/TV Show: last thing i watched was leverage

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: sweet. i cannot cook only bake

Relationship Status: no thanks 💛

Last Thing I Googled: sabot (my second graders asked what it meant and i didn't know)

Current Obsession: super into mdzs right now

Last Book: hellblazer volume 1

Looking Forward To: going home from work lol

tagging @yellow-faerie @fixtationstation @senalishia @seenonacid @nimouette @sanshanitizer @lunarsquidstuff @mooskeetskeet @cottencandyjellyfish @jerified @les-mys @paradoxspaceheater

[hatsukeii]

One where y/n has been obviously in love with Tsuki since they were kids and not afraid to show it, but he’s always been lowkey mean to her and thinks she’s annoying and then finally years later she decides he’s not a nice guy and let’s him know she’s fine with all that crap and then he realizes he’s falling for her and does something really sweet for her and they fall in love? 😭😭🥺👉🏻👈🏻 ty in advance. Sorry if this is too long or specific, if it is, feel free to ignore

I genuinely hope you didn’t think I would actually ignore this<33

IM SORRY IM A MASTER PROCRASTINATOR ILY ALL AND YOU ALL DESERVE AN APOLOGY FROM ME

Dear diary//Tsukishima Kei x Reader

Word Count: 1.4k+

Warnings: Cursing

Genre: Angst??? I guess???

Summary: He’s an ass, but you still love him to bits, and it’s killing you.

July 16, 2008

Dear Diary,

I got to play with Tsukki again! He had his dino with him, it was super cute! He told me his front teeth came off last night, and there’s a big hole in his teeth, but it’s okay, because he said it will grow back. I tried to hold his hand while going down the twin slides but he said it was sweaty, so next time I’ll wear gloves!

You flip through the hot pink diary, cringing at your young infatuation. Your diary entries were cringey as fuck, but they always rekindle something within you whenever you read them. You can’t even remember when you stopped writing in the book. Was it when you turned 10? Maybe 12? You don’t have a single clue.

April 30, 2011

Dear Diary,

Tsukki refused to marry me in the playground at break:(( I’ve known him for so long though, aren’t we supposed to get married? I just wanna hold his hand and hug him and give him a biiiiig kiss<33

Chuckling at the memory, you recalled the event from that entry clearly. You were seven years old only, still an immature kid. You still thought that getting married in a middle school playground was a huge milestone in life, almost as crucial as a legal marriage.

May 29, 2016

Dear Diary,

Love how Tsukki didn’t even remember my birthday:,) Must be nice getting made fun of. Half the students in my class felt my second hand embarrassment from when he completely forgot about it. God, why am I even in love with this asshole? I’m gonna have to go to school tomorrow and deal with all my classmates making fun of me for being hopeless. Brb, currently digging a hole for myself:)

Frowning at the memory, you think back to when you were twelve. He was an asshole then, still is an asshole to this day. And yet not an ounce of your unconditional love and support for him has faded. Grabbing a tissue, you wipe the remaining tears from your eyes, ignoring the dried tear stains on your cheek. Your hand slams onto the bedside table, lazily feeling for your phone. Tilting it towards your face, you sigh at the empty lock screen, accepting defeat. Flicking through the rest of the book, you are welcomed by pages and pages of white. “So that’s when I gave up on this diary...” you mutter to yourself as you lift yourself up from your bed. Heading towards your desk, you absentmindedly grab yourself a pen, notebook in hand. Slamming the diary down, you open it up to the next entry page after your last one, gently placing the tip of your pen on the first line. You grab your hair out of frustration, the ink bleeding into the thin paper. “What to do, what to do...?” You mumble, starting to form sentences in your notebook.

July 17, 2020

Dear Diary,

It’s been a while hasn’t it? Holy shit, all my entries were about Tsukki weren’t they? Jesus, of course they were. At least I was able to get it off my chest this afternoon. Telling him that I’ve been in love with him for years, that was fucking terrifying. Telling him that although I know he’s an ass, an animatronic dick complete with ballsack, that won’t stop me from falling harder, it was gut wrenching, but also relieving to a certain degree. I’m still waiting for some form of response, although I’m not sure I’m gonna get one anytime soon. I can’t decide whether telling him was the dumbest or bravest decision I’ve made. Maybe it was both. Just wait until I look back on this entry like a decade later and still cry about it lmao. Tbh he’s a genuinely nice person at heart. I know that all too well. He may be an ass most the time, and he may think I’m annoying, but despite how hard he tries to push me away, I’ll never abandon him. Jesus Christ, I sound like a yandere here, but it’s not that. It’s that I care for him a lot. Maybe even a bit too much. It’s ridiculous how absolute and utter shit a crush can make you feel.

Throwing the pen down, you flop back onto your bed, huffing into the thick blankets. You stay silent, not sure of what to think of the situation. “I’ll just deal with it all tomorrow, I’m tired of this shit.”

On the other side of the incident, Tsukishima is currently going through a mental crisis.

The blond sits at his desk, eyes unwavering, but focusing on nothing. It feels as if he hasn’t blinked in what seemed to be hours. Just hours of staring at his wall that led to nothing. Your confession plays in his head nonstop, like a broken record that refused to run out of battery.

“The thing is I like you. I’m pretty sure I always have. And I know that you’re such an asshole and all that, you won’t treat me as well as people would expect, but it’s fine. I’m fine with all that. All the dumb, stupid, careless insults you’ll throw at me, the side eyes and sneers, telling me to shut up and go away, I’m fine with it. I know you’re a good person, and that’s all that matters to me.”

“Well shit what the fuck do you want me to say?”

Maybe he shouldn’t have said that.

Maybe he should have let you down slowly.

But as he stares at his wall, the photos of the two of you framed and balanced on his floating shelves, he starts to reconsider his feelings.

The way your expression faltered then as you hastily took your bag and rushed away without a single word, the way you avoided him in the halls, the way you stopped talking to him throughout the day, it drove him crazy. He couldn’t handle the realisation that he hurt you so incredibly badly, so now all he can do is stare at his empty, blank wall. Did he know why he felt that way? No. He didn’t and still doesn’t. He’s Tsukishima fucking Kei, the emotionless, provoking, unlikeable king, yet a mere girl is somehow able to mess with his mind so badly, that all he can do is wallow in regret and confusion? What is this weird feeling? His throat itches, his heart is beating like crazy, sweat starting to gather around his temples. He clamps his two hands together, slamming his forehead onto them and squeezing his eyes shut.

How could I have been so dense?

How was he unable to see that you were absolutely in love with him? Even with the bento boxes, birthday gifts, constant compliments, he still only ever thought you liked him as a friend. However he never did. He likes you more than that. Way more. Yes, he thought, and still thinks you can be annoying at times, especially when you nag at him about not eating enough or being rude, but it was undeniable that there was something else he felt. But his stupid ass shitty ego would never let him admit it. And now that you finally confessed, he freaked out and fucked up. Even then, he didn’t think it would affect him to this extent.

“It was a stupid middle school crush, I’m over you (Y/N).”

He says that over and over again, desperate to cloud out the disagreeing thoughts in his head that scream otherwise.

“It was a stupid middle school crush, I’m over you.”

“It was a stupid middle school crush, I’m over you.”

“It was a stupid middle school crush, I’m over you.”

The guilt didn’t go away.

In fact, now that he’s said all that, he feels even worse. Oh how much he wants to find you right this second, wrap you in his arms, tell you how incredibly sorry he is, but he can’t. He doesn’t deserve to do that. His heart is begging for him to just get out of the house and run to yours as fast as he could, but his body won’t move. He wants to cry. Scream. Shout. Throw something. Shatter something. But most of all, he wants to get another chance.

Picking up his phone, he hesitates, before typing in your contact, the cleared out, empty chatroom showing up on his screen. Going as fast as his fingers could, he typed out the one sentence he’s been dying to let out.

“It was a middle school crush, but I’m still into you. I always have been.”

Is it just me, or is this bad-

Idk man it seems like all my fics are pretty much the same and I hate it😌

Tags:

@sunshines-and-tatertots @izzyphantomgamer @justachillgirl @trashcanweeb @just-another-bored-writer @poppirocks @majorfangirl37 @kaylacinderella @random-fandomlover @tiger1719 @tiredgr3mlin @itmekisuu @skyeackermans @talks-a-lot-of-stuff @shoutsukii @agentvicinity @sakusasgarbage @kuroo-thought-of-a-better-un @sneezefiction @bokutokoutarou @thirstyvolleyballhoe @iwaixiumi @iwaigroomi @inlwlevi

Feel free to comment or pm to be added to taglist!

I’m back to writing lmao I’m bored in two week quarantine rn

Edit: cue me realising I was half asleep and missed something in the request don’t be surprised if I repost this💀💀💀💀

Btw the hq manga just ended time to cry

💕💕💕💕

[jilliancares]

hi! i've been back to my klance obsession so i've been going through the tag on ao3 again and i stumbled upon one of your fics! it's the one called "sweetheart". and i have read many many good fics but i think that i've finally found my favourite one! i don't think i've ever experienced so much joy reading a story before. i was reading and i was completely captured and i just didn't want it to end. the complete one-eighty the use of pet names did was incredible!! starting off as insults and ending as actual endearments is peak klance and you portrayed that so perfectly i can't even begin to describe it. it just hit all the right spots for me. thank you so much for that story

oh man!!!!!! thank you so much my dude!!!! that fic was definitely a lot of fun for me to write :') and ty for taking the time to come to my tumblr and tell me!!! <33

[xyloophones]

Reply with five things that make you happy. Then, pass this ask onto the first ten people in your notifications. Please feel free to ignore this

OOOH ok lets seee

boba.... im back home from uni and i've been hitting up all my fav boba places basically every day since i've been back hasjashs i went to this rlly cute pink bunny themed boba shop the other day and had a black sesame latte w/ drinkable mochi in it and.... yall... i literally ascended

when friends send me posts/tweets/tiktoks that remind them of me.. gets me so <33 mm heart-eye emoji <333 I LUV IT

my cat !

bts.......... if u've been following me for a while then u know i like to sneak in a lot of references but i recently saw them in concert again and i <33 also have a tattoo appointment in 2 weeks for a slightly related tattoo but shhhh dont tell anyone i swear im..... a casual fan :D ......

comments HAHAAH i feel like every writer/creator/artist always says this but like yes.. sweet comments n asks are literally my life force <33 i screenshot my favs n put them in a special "for writers block" folder to motivate myself <33

that was fun !!!!! ty for the prompt pall !! also wanna encourage everyone else to post abt things that make you happy (and tag me if ur comfy!) because this was a nice exercise in positivity <3

[appreciatingtokrev]

OKAY ASFHJGDHHDS FIRST OF ALL TYSM TAKU 😭😭😭 <33

taku dear. taku. there is a hurt no comfort tag silly (but yes i understand)

yeah :(

YES PARALELLS HEHE. YES PARALELLS HEHEHE. dies. no but i relate 100% they are certainly making me sad too plus they def are one of my fav tropes. not just angst they are always great i think

asgjgfjh :(( thank you!!

aa ty again!! (also bg lore just for you: that scene where tetta comes home with broken glasses n he says he saw a horrible person die a horrible death? yeah that was bloody halloween)

his boy is imaginary, tetta’s just tired of hideko’s questions and it’s a good way for him to cover up his delinquency... but feel free to imagine someone 👀 (i understand i understand!! ty ty)

YES HETEROCHROMIA HANMA (srsly at this point i can’t imagine him differently like any other eye colors are just plain wrong to me idk lmao)

asfjdggsd ty!! ty ty

no bc she’s just like me too fr damn

mhm :(( mhm!! :(

hehehe

‘‘oh hideko....’’ realest sentence ever taku fr this basically describes everything and anything ever going on in her life in reader perspective. also it’s a very true sentence i oh hideko.... a lot... oh hideko....

YES THE TRUCK

yeah :(( i love when they are friends. kinda. for a bit. like before canon happens. yes yes

:((

TYSM AGAIN AA TYSM TY TY!! 😭😭 I’M SO GLAD THAT YOU SEE THE DETAILS N ATTENTION I PUT INTO THIS PLUS CONNECTING THE LITTLE THINGS AA IT’S A GENUINLY SO FUN THING N I’M P PROUD OF IT FOR THIS FIC SO I’M GLAD!!!

thank you 😭😭 taku i love you too aa

of loving men and /loving/ men

link to ao3

rating: t (rated t for mentions/descriptions of abuse, neglect, trauma, death, and grief)

archive warnings: chose not to use archive warnings

relationships: kisaki hideko (kisaki tetta’s mother) & kisaki tetta

characters: kisaki hideko (kisaki tetta’s mother)

additional tags: hanma shuji, mentioned kisaki tetta, kisaki tetta dies, kisaki tetta’s father, non-linear narrative, angst, hurt no comfort, character study, relationship study, regret, grief/mourning, family issues, physical abuse, emotional/psychological abuse, past domestic violence, neglect, child neglect, past child abuse, trauma, mental health issues, minor character death, canonical character death, original character death(s)

wordcount: ~4.3k

notes: her name is (with permission) directly taken from the diary of a boy who will never be missed by @/ruoyeah on ao3 btw,, this fic is also inspired by said work, as well as mourning sickness by @/dazed (spiritscript), also on ao3!! also i think i could write abt hideko forever i grew too attached to her... i love her sm and somehow writing this was very easy?? i see it as a win

Tetta’s mother is a wreck. Hideko is a wreck. Hideko is a punching bag, a ghost, and anything she could possibly be, except herself.

Or: A study on Kisaki Tetta’s mother.

She sees him standing in front of her son’s grave. His name is Hanma, she guesses, and he looks just as sad as she does with his shoulders held low and his hood on his head. Her hair is starting to go gray, and she’s only thirty-five. She’s not pretty anymore, and she’s still so young. The grief doesn’t suit her.

He turns around as she walks closer, recognising the familiar blue in her eyes. ,,Are you Kisaki’s mother?’’, he asks, and the grief doesn’t suit him either. He’s letting his hair grow out, it seems, and his voice is monotone. There’s no smile decorating his lips, only a cigarette.

,,I’m Kisaki Hideko’’, she introduces herself, ,,I believe that you’re Hanma? You were his friend.’’ She tries to smile, but the corners of her mouth only waver.

 

,,I’m Kisaki Hideko’’, she introduces herself, ,,I got married last month. Please change my name in your database.’’ She smiles. Her hair isn’t gray yet.

,,Oh, congratulations!’’, the girl at the counter exclaims, and types something into the computer in front of her. Probably her new name. It feels too fresh, too unfamiliar, but she likes the sound of it. Kisaki. Like her husband. Like the little boy that’s growing in her womb.

,,Thank you, dear’’, she says and bows her head. ,,I’m very happy, he’s a loving man.’’ A loving man who kisses her belly every morning, and who runs his fingers through her hair. A loving man who brings her flowers, and makes her tea. A loving man who’s never home, and hits her with his belt. She’s still not sure which part is real and which part she pretends is.

,,I’m very glad for you. I hope to one day marry a man like yours’’, the girl says, smiling, fully believing it’s real. It makes her believe it’s real. That he’s a loving man, and that the little Kisaki inside her belly will turn out to be a loving man, too. She’s sure of it.

 

And Tetta was a loving man. Perhaps he was too loving for his girl. Perhaps she was too loving for him. Or not loving enough. It was hard to love when the people you love loved through abuse and neglect. She now knows that she did it wrong herself. Loving. All her life, she thought that there was one thing you couldn’t fail, no matter what—and yet here she is, standing in front of a gravestone, with everything she ever claimed to love buried six feet under.

She now knows that she loved wrongly. She fell in love with the wrong man, gave birth to the wrong boy, and raised him wrongly. Both the loving man that she married and the loving man that she carried in her belly for nine months are dead, and she doesn’t think she ever wanted to love them at all. Not the man who hit her when he wasn’t away like always, and not the man who was away when he didn’t hit her like always.

 

Tetta always watches when he hits her. She doesn’t know why. Out of fear, maybe, out of power, out of love. He looks at her with those big eyes full of pain and hate and rage. She hopes that the hate and rage are for her husband. And she looks back with the same emotions on her face.

She hugs Tetta when he leaves the room, holds him close. He doesn’t move. She lays her head on his shoulder, and she doesn’t cry. He’s already five years old. It’s nothing new.

 

It’s nothing new when Tetta comes home with bruises. He’s thirteen, and he’s a delinquent, and he knows what to do. He knows half of the books in the library by heart, and she knows how double the bruises on his body feel. They feel like love. She smiles, he must have a loving boy. Girls don’t hit, only boys do, and she doesn’t care because her son looks normal and loved.

She teaches Tetta how to hide the bruises, how to touch them up with makeup. They’re standing in front of the bathroom sink. She’s looking at his blue eyes in the mirror. They’re the same color as hers, the same color as the sky, the same color as the monster in her nightmares. They’re beautiful. She corrects Tetta when he applies too much foundation. It’s meant to look like his skin is perfect. No bruises, no makeup. Flawless, just like everything else about him.

Tetta comes home with blood on his face and broken glasses. He wears a proud smile. She asks him what happened, why he’s so happy. He says that he watched a horrible person die a horrible death. That day, she wonders if he saw her smile as she watched her loving man die. She wonders if his loving boy died. She wonders if she killed him. She wonders if he did.

 

Days after Tetta’s death, it’s the first time in eighteen years that she allows herself to try and break down the facade again. It’s hard. It’s hard to let out the seventeen year old girl in herself when she was defined by having money, smiling, and being hit for so long. It’s hard to let out the little kid in herself when she wanted nothing but for herself to be a good mother, and she failed nothing except that. It’s hard when you ended up being the most unloving loving mother. But, still, she tries her best. So she goes to buy a stuffed cat and cuts it open with a pair of scissors after she comes home. And then she cries.

 

One day, she notices that Tetta hasn’t come home with bruises in a while. ,,Does he not love you anymore?’’, she asks him.

,,Who?’’, he asks back, staring at her face with his blue eyes. With her blue eyes. And his cheekbones. And jawline. And eyebrows, and ears, and lips, and teeth, and hair color. He bleaches his hair a lot, but it’s not enough to cover the black roots. It’s like makeup. It fades out, and it stops hiding the ugly bruises she gets from her loving man. It stops hiding the black hair he inherited from his loving father.

,,You know, the boy you love. The one who caused all the bruises. He must’ve loved you as much as my husband loved me’’, she explains. What she’s talking about is all normal, she tells herself, it’s how love is supposed to work. Because love is suffering through pain for someone, love is covering up the issues for them, love is looking at your bruises at night, and it’s smiling about your lover’s dead body at the foot of the stairs.

,,Oh, he’s gone. But there’s a girl I’ve loved for even longer. She’s precious. She wouldn’t ever hit anyone’’, Tetta says. She wonders if his loving boy was the one who he smiled about when he came home with broken glasses, but she doesn’t ask. It’s not important anyway. She’s glad that there’s a girl that he loves so much. She’s glad that he doesn’t get hit anymore. She’s glad that she pushed him down the stairs, and that Tetta smiled about his death.

 

Her father reaches for her hand, and she flinches away before grabbing his. She squeezes his fingers, doesn’t let go. ,,My precious daughter....’’, he breathes out, and she tries to pretend that it means something as he continues, ,,I love you. Don’t cry.’’ She does. She sobs, horribly, and she screams. The word love doesn’t mean anything to her, but she feels like she’s robbed of everything she’s ever had. His hand slips from hers, he’s dead. And she’s all alone, because her loving man is at work, away, somewhere at the other end of the sea, and she doesn’t have anyone else.

 

Tetta’s favorite food is fried rice with lots of vegetables, and she makes sure to cook it often. Just for him. Hence, she’s filling bowls with tofu, spicy rice, and lots of carrots. She sets the table, makes sure to place his plate between his chopsticks and a glass of water, right beside her own. ,,Tetta!’’, she calls, ,,Dinner is ready.’’ Soon after, he arrives as she’s already sitting on her chair, waiting for him to join in, but he just grabs his food and chopsticks. He turns around, goes back to his room. She sighs, and starts her dinner, and it tastes as bland as every day that she has it alone because her own son won’t look her in the eyes.

 

,,Hanma Shuji. Nice to meet you, ma’am’’, he says. She has to look up to see his eyes. He’s so much taller than her, than Tetta, about the height of her late husband. His eyes are dull, one is yellow, one purple. She doesn’t know why she searches for the blue in every pair.

,,I’m sorry’’, is all she can manage. She doesn’t know what else to say. Her son is dead, and she loved him so much that it wasn’t enough. She wishes that she’d never given birth to him. She wishes that she’d never loved him.

 

,,I hate you’’, she whispers, cradling Tetta in her arms. He’s sleeping soundly, and she doesn’t want to wake him. He looks so peaceful, so weak wrapped up in the white blanket. It scares her. It scares her; that he could die.

,,I hate you so much, Tetta. I wish I would’ve never given birth to you’’, she continues to whisper. She loves him. She hopes that he’ll live forever. Tetta’s just a little boy, and he deserves the world, she thinks. He deserves everything that she gives him, and everything that she doesn’t.

 

She hates the grave that she stands in front of. Her hair is starting to go gray, and there are two bodies buried under the flowers. Two loving men. One that she loved too much, and one that she didn’t love enough. She misses the bruises. She misses the laughter. She misses herself. But she doesn’t miss either of the dead men.

 

Often, she dreams of blue skies, and she’s just a little girl dreaming of happiness and comfort. She dreams of blue skies over green flower fields, blue skies over dark and mysterious forests, blue skies over rivers running full of blood. She’s only four, she’s only five, she’s only six, only seven, eight, nine, ten. She doesn’t know what the blue skies and the rivers full of blood mean. Sometimes she wishes she does.

 

Her loving man leans down, gets on one knee, and holds up a little ring. She knows that it’s his grandmother’s wedding ring, and that it means the world to him. He asks if she wants to marry him, and she says yes as she breaks out in tears. She doesn’t know if she cries because she’s happy or if she does because she’s sad. He doesn’t hold her.

He never holds her. He didn’t hold her when she was seventeen, he didn’t hold her when her father died, he didn’t hold her on the day they got married. He didn’t hold her when she gave birth to their son. He wasn’t even there. All he ever does is give her money, and flowers, and expensive dresses, and yet another credit card. She’s happy, she’s glad that she can create her own life, but sometimes she just really wants to be held.

 

Tetta never tells her about his friends. She asks and asks, but he always says that he doesn’t want to talk. She says that she knows that he sneaks in every day, every night, that he could walk through the door instead. He says that she’s hallucinating. That she’s making it up to make him feel bad about not ever bringing anyone over.

One day, Tetta tells her that his name is Hanma. That she should finally stop asking questions, because it’s his business, not hers. So she does. She starts pressing her ear to the door of his room and smiles when she hears them laugh. She smiles when he hears Tetta curse out Hanma for eating chips on his bed. She smiles when she hears Hanma’s screams of joy for winning a video game and Tetta’s snickers about how his mother shouldn’t find out that he’s there.

 

Their house always feels so empty. Most of the time, Tetta is there, but it’s as if he isn’t. He’s completely silent, staying in his room all day, closing the door when he comes into the kitchen to get food. She doesn’t know what to make of it. She tells him that he doesn’t always have to study, that he can take breaks, tells him that she won’t be mad if he’s in the living room, that it’s okay if he makes noises, that she won’t go and snoop around in his things if he doesn’t lock the door. But Tetta doesn’t listen, and she feels so guilty and helpless, and she tries to forget it by always having television run in the background.

Tetta starts to go out with his delinquent friends a lot, and while she’s happy for him, she’s mostly happy for herself. He has a good life, he does nice things, and she doesn’t have to feel miserable about their house feeling so empty all the time because it is. There is no loving man in their house, most of the time, and neither is there a loving boy. And she feels alone, so very alone and lonely, but now she has the right to be sad about it.

 

She picks up the stuffed cat that her mother just bought her. It’s fluffy, and big, and warm. It makes her feel safe. She looks at her mother, into her dark eyes, and she searches for something she’s never seen. ,,Go play in your own room. I need to do work. Hush!’’, she shoos, gesturing towards the door. She looks back one last time, then leaves, running away until she climbs onto her bed. She takes her scissors and starts to cut open the fluffy cat because there is no love in her mother’s eyes, and the only affection she gets is money. And it doesn’t matter anyway because she will just buy her a new one without asking what happened to the other.

 

When Tetta brings home good grades, she smiles. When Tetta brings home bruises, she smiles. When Tetta brings home books, she smiles. When Tetta gets brought home in a casket, she smiles. All she’s ever done is smile, and she only stops after she knows that her loving men are both dead because she’s seen both of their corpses. She thinks that she should hate herself. She’s sad, and she’s not smiling anymore, but she’s relieved that they’re gone. She’s always been scared of the name Kisaki.

She loves Tetta. She loves him with all her heart, all her might, and she loves that he’s dead. She wishes that he’d never died. She wishes that she’d raised him differently. That she’d gotten rid of her husband earlier in life. That she’d never given birth to her son. That he’d been born into another family. She still loves him too much.

 

,,What for?’’, he asks. He lifts his cigarette up to his lips, takes another drag. He turns his head away to breathe out the smoke, caring enough not to blow it into her face. She wonders why this boy cares more than hers ever did.

,,For loving him’’, she says. It doesn’t make sense to him, she knows that, but it’s the truth. She’s sorry for everything. And everything she’s ever done was love the wrong man and love the wrong son.

Hanma looks at her. This time he doesn’t look away to breathe out the smoke, blows it right into her face. She coughs, does her best to stop. She stares up at his face. His eyebrows are softer, his jawline is even sharper, his cheekbones are lower, his lips are wider, his hair is darker than the bleach and lighter than the roots, and his ears are rounder, his teeth are not the same. She doesn’t know why she keeps comparing everyone to him. Everyone except herself.

 

Tetta is turning out pretty well. She’s raising him the way her mother raised her, with neglect. She gives him food, and water, and a warm bed, and money. She gives him the opportunity, he builds his own life. He buys books, and snacks, and a video game console, and she knows that he dislikes video games, and that it’s for Hanma, but she doesn’t say anything.

She hopes that the money is enough to keep him happy. She never comforts him, and he never cries. He doesn’t stand still in the doorway and stares as he hits her anymore, because he’s dead, and she goes to place new flowers on his grave and throw away the old ones every two weeks. It snows, and she ignores her freezing hands as she digs through the inches to reach for the old petals.

 

She blows out the seventeen candles on her chocolate cake. She doesn’t really like chocolate, prefers vanilla, but she feels like she should be happy that her father left a cake for her birthday in the freezer because it’s still better than nothing. It’s her only gift, except for the new book she bought herself, because her father is at work, far far away, and her boyfriend is staying with his grieving mother, who’s just lost her husband. And she thinks that she should be happy, because at least she has a birthday cake, and birthday candles, and a birthday wish, but she also knows that she will never truly be loved, no matter how many wishes she makes.

 

They never go somewhere together. A few times she’s asked if Tetta would like to go anywhere, but he said no every time, arguing that he could just go alone. Or that she could go alone, if she wanted to. Or to find someone else to do things with because he doesn’t want to. It’s not her fault, she thinks, that she wasn’t ever there for him. There never was any moment in his life in which he needed someone other than himself. She would have been there. She would have been there to stop the truck if she had known.

 

He’s a small child, barely ten, and he brings home a friend for the first time. His name is Takemichi. He has black hair and green eyes. He’s loud, he talks a lot, and Tetta looks at him as if he was heaven and hell at the same time. She cuts a mango and some melon into slices, puts it all into a bowl, and brings it into his room. Takemichi’s eyes shine bright, he grins and bows his head. Tetta just nods. She leaves and closes the door behind her. It’s the last time Takemichi ever comes over, and it’s the last time Tetta shows her one of his friends.

 

,,Father, do you think that mother will ever come back?’’, she asks, looking up from her book to study his expression. It shifts from a peaceful reading face to that of a man after five years of war. He furrows his brows, unfocuses his eyes, and wrinkles form on his forehead as he slightly scrunches up his nose. The corners of his mouth waver in a sad attempt to smile.

,,I don’t know. I don’t know, Hideko’’, he says, slowly shaking his head. She knows that he tells the truth, she knows, and she still hopes that he’s lying. She still hopes for her mother to come back. Even though she’s just a woman, just a woman in a thirteen year old girl’s life who tries to keep her happy by buying her expensive gifts and credit cards. A woman who doesn’t realise that all her daughter’s ever wanted was to be loved, to be held, to be looked at with gentle eyes and a soft smile. And she vows to never ever become such a mother herself, and instead hug her future son, to hug him, even if he doesn’t cry, and to show him how much she cares.

 

She loved her son so much that it wasn’t enough. She didn’t love her husband enough, and it still ended up being too much. They’re both dead. Now she’s stuck with just herself, and she doesn’t think that she can ever love herself again after everything she’s done and lived through. She misses the green flower fields, and the dark, mysterious forests in her dreams. She misses the happiness that the blue skies brought. She misses herself, and she misses the little girl she used to love so much. Because when she was a child, there had been no one else to love except herself.

 

Her loving man calls, she puts him on speaker after his request. Four year old Tetta’s sitting on her knees, excitedly waiting for his father to tell him that he’ll be back before the next day. ,,I’m sorry, darling, I’m so very sorry, Tetta. I can’t make it today. Expect me to be home next month instead. I miss and love you both, but I have to go now. Goodbye’’, is all he says. Tetta frowns, pouts, his lip is trembling. But he doesn’t cry. He doesn’t scream. She smiles.

,,I’m sure he’ll be back next time, Tetta. Only two more weeks’’, she tries to lift both of their spirits. It doesn’t work. Tetta gets up, tells her that he’s fine, walks into his own room, and closes the door. He doesn’t need her, or any of her love. Nor does he need his father. All he needs is himself, and the world at his feet, but he’s at the feet of the world instead, and she wonders why a four year old tries to be so grown up when all she wishes for is to be a kid again.

 

Tetta never hits her. He never hits anyone, as far as she knows. He’s a delinquent, and he fights, he beats up people, but only the ones who can hit back. She fears that he will never love anyone because love is supposed to hurt. Love is supposed to rob you of yourself. She knows that Tetta will grow up to be a loving man, that he will never hit anyone, and that his love won’t hurt. And she’s jealous of that.

Tetta never gets hit. She doesn’t hit him, because women don’t hit. Girls don’t hit. And her loving man, she doesn’t know why, but she thinks he doesn’t love their son because he never hits him, and inflicting pain is how he shows his love. Or maybe he loves him through her, he loves through the money he gives her that she then gives Tetta. But that doesn’t really count, she thinks, because he never looks Tetta in the eyes and smiles when she gives him his money because he’s never home.

 

She looks at the stairs, and thinks about how they killed one of her loving men. She remembers the other. A truck. She remembers the man in the truck, scrambles for her phone. She calls the police department, asks for the man who killed her loving boy. He was sent to the hospital, she gets told, and then she calls the number they tell her when she asks about it. Someone picks up. She asks for his name. He’s alive, they say, he barely made it. They ask if she’s family, and she says that she is. She asks if they have his number. They do, and she calls him.

,,I forgive you’’, she whispers when he picks up, ,,I forgive you for killing my son.’’ A sad laugh escapes her. She still loves him too much. She’s glad that he’s dead. She wishes that he’d been immortal. The man says something, but she doesn’t understand what. She can’t concentrate on the words. All she can concentrate on is herself, herself and her two dead, loving men. She hangs up, and goes to drink a glass of water.

 

She has everything she’s ever wanted, and somehow, she’s still broken all of the promises she’s made with herself as a kid. She promised to love her future son, to love him with warmth, with welcoming arms. She promised to marry a kind man, one who doesn’t hit or scream, one who cares. She promised not to do any of the mistakes her parents did. And still, twenty-five years later, she’s lying in her bed at night with a husband who hits, and a son who never tells her good night. And all the money in her bank account, all the marriage certificates on her desk, and all the birth papers in her drawer can’t fix it.

 

Hanma sighs. He nods. He takes another puff of his cigarette. He blows more smoke into her face. He stares into her eyes. ,,I thought I loved the color blue’’, he says, and then he turns around. She, too, thought that she loved the color blue. In reality, she loved her old self. What little that was left of her. She stared at his blue eyes so much because they resembled her own.

,,It was nice to meet you’’, she calls after him. Maybe he doesn’t hear her, maybe he just doesn’t react. He walks away without looking back. She turns to the gravestone, and thinks about the blue in her eyes, in his eyes, in the sky, and in the monster from her nightmares. The monster is a little girl, with tears on her cheeks, and blood on her hands. It’s her. It’s the tears she cries for all the people she loves. It’s the blood of all the people she’s killed by loving wrongly. It’s the blood of herself.

tag list: @offtaskotaku

[80s90smovies]

Riley’s Sleepover!

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OKAY SO before i get into this, i just wanted to throw it out there that this is inspired by a lot of blogs i follow / have seen in tags. if this looks eerily similar to anyone that you recognize, pls message me so i can give them credit ty ty.

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ＴＨＥ ＲＵＮＤＯＷＮ :

I feel like i’ve been letting you guys down with my lack of content lately, but i’ve been kinda uninspired, so i wanted to do something fun and laid back! this weekend (6/26 - 6/29) i will be writing requests and answering asks based on the following list!

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ＨＯＷ ＩＴ ＷＯＲＫＳ:

for drabbles / headcanons, send me the corresponding number(s) with the character of your choice. i’ll accept any characters from any fandom mentioned on my blog (80s,90s,certain book series, and harry potter). i’ll respond to your ask with what i cook up! everything i post from this will be tagged under “ rileys sleepover “ !

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ＴＨＥ ＬＩＳＴＳ :

𝒬𝓊𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈 / 𝒢𝒶𝓂𝑒𝓈 

1. FMK  2. My opinion on ___ 3. My top 3 ___ 4. Tell me anything 5. Ask me anything (i will tell u my deepest darkest secrets)

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𝒟𝒾𝒶𝓁𝑜𝑔𝓊𝑒 𝒫𝓇𝑜𝓂𝓅𝓉𝓈

6. “Are you kidnapping me?” | “I like to think of it as more of a borrowing type thing” 7. “You’re blocking the view.” | “I am the view.” 8. “Wait, are you jealous?” 9. “Are you flirting with me?” 10. “If I win, you have to kiss me.” | “And if I win?” | “You won’t so it doesn’t matter.”  11. “Why didn’t you bring a jacket?” | “Because I knew you’d give me yours.” 12. “I don’t want to just be your best friend anymore!” 13. “Is that my shirt?” 14. “Mind if I cut in?” 15. “Why are you holding a puppy?” 16. “Uh... hi?”  17. “So, funny story...” 18. “You’re blushing.” 19. “You missed.” 20. “Have I ever mentioned how beautiful you are?” 21. “Stop, let me help you.” 22. “Your lips taste like cherries.” 23. “Is that a threat?” | “It’s a promise.” 24. “What is so important that you had to wake me up at 2 am?” 25. “I’m so in love with you.” 26. Send me your own!

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𝐿𝓎𝓇𝒾𝒸 𝒫𝓇𝑜𝓂𝓅𝓉𝓈

27. “I love you but sometimes I’d rather die.” 28. “Take a piece of my heart, and make it all your own.” 29. “I’m tired of this town again.” 30. “First you say you love me, then you say you don’t.” 31. “Good love is hard to find.” 32. “Look at the stars.” 33. “Would you lie with me and just forget the world?” 34. “If the whole world was watching, I’d still dance with you.” 35. “You can’t blame me for trying.” 36. “Meet me in the pouring rain.” 37. “Kiss me on the sidewalk.” 38. “I should be over all the butterflies, but I’m into you.”  39. Send me your own!

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𝐻𝑒𝒶𝒹𝒸𝒶𝓃𝑜𝓃𝓈

40. Beach day 41. Snow days 42. Meeting your parents 43. Taking care of them when they’re sick / vice versa 44. Being their sibling 45. Going to a carnival / fair 46. What they’re like when jealous 47. Adopting a pet 48. Moving in / living together 49. Wedding planning 50. Pregnancy reactions / choosing to adopt (pls specify in your ask!) 51. Send me your own!

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𝒱𝒾𝓈𝓊𝒶𝓁𝓈

52. Moodboard / Aesthetic 53. Instagram AU 54. Twitter AU 55. Inside their phone AU

[written-by-weird]

Get to Know Me!

RuLes: Complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning. When you’re finished, tag people to do this survey. Have fun and enjoy!

Tagged by @birdiethought

1.) Are you named after someone? Uhh... Not that I know of. Had I been born a male, then yea, but no. I believe I am the first one to have my name in my family... Huh- that’s weird.

2.) When was the last time you cried? I’d have to say- a few weeks ago. I was having a depression moment, and things weren’t feeling too hot. Getting better soon!

3.) Do you like your handwriting? Ha! My handwriting is never the same. I like how it looks when I am writing quickly, because it looks a little script like, and is very tiny and compact. However, when my hand gets tired, or if I am writing slow, none of the letters look like their counterparts. Blegh. Granted, I have Architect’s writing, so...

4.) What is your favorite lunch meat? To be honest, I don’t eat that many sandwiches... Mostly because I am so picky, that it’s too labor-some to think about them. But I like Ham.

5.) If you were another person, would you be friends with you? Good question! I’m pretty introverted, and don’t really make myself known unless I have to.. So- unless you were in my similar interest, or some place I frequent then I probably wouldn’t seek me out, and therefore, by reasons of me being absent, we wouldn’t be friends.

6.) Do you use sarcasm? Hell yeah. Also, my sarcasm is so good sometimes, you can’t tell I’m using it, which I think is a good tool.

7.) Do you still have your tonsils. Yup! I actually have never had surgery or any operation done ever, so... Knock on wood now!

8.) Would you bungee jump? Hell NO! I hate heights, it makes my legs shaky, and I can’t do it. No. Nope. Nada. Never. Bye bye.

9.) What is your favorite kind of cereal? To be honest, I’m not really a breakfast person... But, I do prefer the more sugary ones. I won’t eat a lot, but I think fruity pebbles might be my favorite.

10.) Do you untie your shoelaces when you take shoes off? 95% of the time, no. I wear my clothes tight because it soothes the anxiety of me losing them, but most of the time, I just slide them off when I’m done wearing them, then go through the ritual of untying them, putting them on, and tying them again. It’s my thing, and it works.

11.) Do you think you’re a strong person? I dunno. I think it depends on what kind of strong you mean? Physically? My arms are noodles, my legs are trees... My mind is pretty strong Intelligence wise... Uhm- I think that I do have some problems that make some things difficult, but I wouldn’t say I’m a ‘weak’ person.

12.) What is your favorite ice-cream? I’ll always have a soft spot for vanilla anything - homestyle is my fav. I try to avoid chocolate and mint. Blegh.

13.) What is the first thing you notice about people? I think I usually notice the way people walk, carry themselves in public, and how they interact with others. I’m really good at reading people (Sometimes), and I can sit and watch people out in public, and know how a person is most likely to act. This helped a lot when I was a server- I would know if someone was a Karen without having to speak with them.

14.) What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself? Uhm- this question is a little confusing, but... I’ll try? I’m going to say my joints- I have really bad hips, knees, ankles, everything, so it makes walking and standing for too long really difficult - I don’t know if I like that about myself, but I can at least joke about it and say I’m an old person in a young person’s body? Like, I’m 20, but feel like I’m 87.

15.) What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now? Well, It’s midnight here, so I’m in bed. I’m wearing black and white athletic shorts, and no shoes... I’ve still got socks on though, cause I’m super lazy, and won’t take them off lmao.

16.) If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Prussian Blue.

17.) Favorite smell? Uhhhhhhhhh - I really like fall. I love fall. Best season. I like the decaying smells of nature around me (Not rotting animal flesh, no) But like, the leaves and stuff- it’s a very comforting smell to me.

18.) Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? I’m going to assume this means through a phone call, and not text, so... MY DAD.

19.) Favorite sport to watch? To be honest, I’m not a huge sports person - When the season is on, and my team is on, I’ll watch football (American), but I really enjoy equestrian sports!

20.) Hair color? Uh... If it’s wet- dark dark brown, but usually an average brown. Like... Laundry lint brown. I dunno, look at my profile photo.

21.) Eye color? Blue - I dunno if it’s a pretty blue, but My pupil has this light brown ring around it, and a darker blue ring around the iris, so I guess it might look a little interesting...

22.) Do you wear contacts? Since I am blind as a bat, yes. I used to primarily wear glasses, but then contacts worked out better for me. I need to take better care of my eyes, and stop sleeping in my contacts. You don’t want to know how long these current ones have been in my eyes. 

23.) Favorite food to eat? I love food, I think anything with carbs is okay for me! I love pasta, and fries... Fries are good.

24.) Scary movies or comedy? Uhm... I dunno. I think an equal mix of both? If the story line is good for the horror movie, then yea, but for comedy, I prefer John Mulaney.

25.) Last movie you watched? Hahahahah. Hahaha. Ha. Soo... When I go to sleep, I need something to play in the background, because I can’t sleep with complete silence, or complete darkness, so I need to listen to something. I’ve been playing the movie CARS every night because it’s familiar, and soothing.

26.) What color shirt are you wearing? Heather gray? I dunno.

27.) Summer or Winter? Uhm. Fall.  JK- I prefer the warmth of summer, but I hate the bugs, so Winter because no bugs... But cold is bad... Mmmn... Fall.

28.) Hugs or Kisses? I dunno. Haven’t had a whole lot of experience in either to truly form an opinion. I guess I’d have to choose hugs because I’ve never kissed anyone, so...

29.) What book are you currently reading? I’ve actually fallen out of reading books... I’ve mostly read fanfiction for a long while, but! At my summer job! One of my coworkers is also a huge nerd, and he suggested I read the book ‘Fingerprints of the Gods’ and it’s actually really good!

30.) Who do you miss right now? I really miss the chickens we lost recently. A raccoon got into the coop a few nights ago, and decimated a little over half our flock. :(

31.) What is on your mousepad? Uhm- it’s like a... Rainbowy marble like thing. But that’s on my school computer for ARCHI stuff. I usually use my laptop, which is the trackpad.

32.) What is the last TV program you watched? Below deck - for those who don’t know, it’s a reality TV show about super yachting. There’s so much drama, it gives me anxiety. I really shouldn’t watch it.

33.) Rolling stones, or the Beatles? MMn Neither?

34.) What is the furthest you’ve ever traveled? For the longest time, it was to travel down to Puerto Rico for a week (I was maybe 12?) But in freshman year of High school, we took a band trip to Hawaii! (So Hawaii is the correct answer).

35.) Do you have a special talent? I dunno- don’t really think so... I mean, if this counts I’d be surprised, but I’m really good at quoting things? Like, some movies, I can say the whole script as it is happening? Or like- vines, I’m really good at vines...

36.) Where were you born? *Sobs* Missouri, USA

I tag anybody who would like to partake in this! I really don’t have any ‘mutuals’ (That I am aware of- please correct me if I’m wrong), so anybody please do this!

[amalthemir]

OC Interview!

I was tagged by @nuka-nuke (luv u bab) for this, so here I go!

1. Choose an OC.

2. Answer them as that OC.

3. Tag 5 people to do the same.

I’ll tag @scarecrow-forest @lamorellenoire6 @chibikinesis @ryu-no-joou and @beetleboo

1. What is your name?

Would be sitting comfortably in a chair, whiskey glass in hand

"We'll aren't you straight to the point. If you've got to know, name's Texas, doll~."

2. Do you know why are you named that?

"Dunno, mama once said somethin' about her ancestors bein' from a place called Texas back before the world went t' shit. Might've all jus' been some bullshit for all I know."

3. Are you single or taken?

Smirks

"Well that answer depends on if I find ya interestin' or not. But for t' sake of time, I'm seein' someone, well, a few someones. That satisfy yer curiosity yet, doll?"

4. Have any abilities or powers?

Laughs

"Sure do princess! I've got a this cute lil' trick where if I say someone is dead, they'll show up dead the next day! World works in strange ways, darlin'."

"Aside from that, I'm killer with an automatic rifle, you'd be dead in a secon' if I wanted it. The rest of my talents are... well, let's just say I'm good with a rope."

5. Stop being a Mary Sue.

"Who t' hell is that Mary Sue lady? You better not be playin' me for a fool if you know what's good for you..."

6. What’s your eye color?

"Brown, plain an' simple. Mama said I had papa's eyes, always said that his were like chocolate- or caramel or some shit. Don't rightly give a fuck to be honest."

7. How about your hair color?

"Brown again, dark brown to be frank, but you can prob'ly see the color better in good lightin'."

8. Have any family members?

"No, mama got sick and died like a dog, and papa left and never came back, fucker probably got himself killed years ago, wouldn't be surprised if he's still in a ditch somewhere back in Vegas."

9. Oh? How about pets?

Sits up a bit straighter

"Well... don't rightly have one unless you count that quantum deathclaw egg I stole- rescued from an empty nest after its parents were... killed in an unfortunate hunting expedition. The thing hasn't hatched, but it hasnt rotten yet either, so don't know what's gonna happen with it."

10. That’s cool, I guess. Now tell me something you don’t like?

"Well now that you mention it, havin' someone waste my time askin' stupid questions is pretty high on my list of things I don't like."

11. Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?

"You mean besides tying people up, takin' people's shit, or getting myself a new "toy" to play with? Dunno, all that takes up most of my time."

12. Have you ever hurt anyone in any way before?

"You... are you fuckin' serious? I had a feelin' you were a dumbass but boy, you're somethin' else. Yeah I've hurt people, sometimes they even like it when I do it."

13. Ever… killed anyone before?

"Well sorry to disappoint, darlin', but you don't get t' where I am without poppin' a few heads. If it makes ya feel any better, I prefer playin' with my toys rather than breakin' 'em... at least at first."

Chuckles

14. What kind of animal are you?

"What kind of- the hell kinda question is that? I don't fuckin' know, a damn coyote for all I care."

15. Name your worst habits?

"Do you really want me to? There's a lot of 'em. Off the top of my head I'd say maybe drinkin' on the job, not bein' able to stop myself from wanting to... get a taste of something I find interesting, and dunno, maybe, just maybe, I like to stay a bit too clean sometimes, old habit really."

16. Do you look up to anyone at all?

"Nope, nobody at all. Other people are just pawns, though I like to play with some more than others."

17. Are you gay, straight or bisexual?

"I'm whatever you want me to be, baby doll."

18. Do you go to school?

"Do we fuckin' look like we have a damn school here at Nukaworld? Or do I like like a damn brat that should be sittin' on a desk takin' damn notes about some bullshit? Yeah, thought so."

19. Ever want to marry and have kids one day?

"Hell no, don' wanna get caught up in any of that business. Like hell that I'm ever gonna allow myself to get tied down to one por sod for the rest of my life. That's what mama did, and look at her now, six feet under cuz she was sure papa would come prancin' on in like nothin' happened. No thanks. As for kids that's another can of blood worms I ain't touchin' anytime soon."

20. Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?

Laughs

"Sure do, people line up to see me every day, all eyes on me whenever I walk in the market, real ego booster if you ask me."

21. What are you most afraid of?

"Dying of boredom, so right now I'm pretty much on death's row."

22. What do you usually wear?

"A suit. I know, I know, you must be wonderin' why the hell I wear a suit, well, to be the best you gotta look the part, don't cha' think? Plus, it's catches people's attention, makes it easier to lure them in. Guess keeping it all clean is a hassle, but I've got people for that."

23. What’s one food that tempts you?

"Hm.... maybe some mirelurk cakes, damn things are pretty good when you find someone to cook 'em right."

24. Am I annoying to you?

"Nooooo of course not. I'm having the time of my life, can't you tell?"

25. Well, it’s still not over!

"Christ sake... this better be worth it."

26. What class are you (low/middle/high)?

"High and mighty, darlin'."

27. How many friends do you have?

"Yes."

28. What are your thoughts on pie?

"Pies? Why fuckin' pies of all damn things? I don't know, them pre-war ones looked good I guess, never had one. Might try to get someone that knows how to make one."

29. Favorite drink?

"Whiskey, plain and simple. Used to have Susnset Sarsaparilla back in Vegas, but they don't have those over here. Nuka-Wild comes close enough I guess, doesn't quite taste the same though."

30. What’s your favorite place?

"Anywhere that's mine, that's private, and a place that I can drag a new toy into in order to have some fun."

31. Are you interested in anyone?

"You could say that... there's a certain pup that I'm training into being more... well behaved. Gotta say, I'm hooked so far."

32. That was a stupid question…

"I'd say the same for all the other questions you've asked, but sure, whatever floats yer boat."

33. Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean?

"Neither."

34. What’s your type?

"Hm... guess I like a challenge. Don't get me wrong, being able to do what I please with someone from day one is always fun, but there's something about breaking them and making them mine that turns me on intensely."

35. Any fetishes?

"Yyyyyup, let's see... domination, bondage, being rough, puppy play, being very physical, etcetera, too many to name."

36. Camping or outdoors?

"Pretty much everyone has slept outdoors before in their lives, how else you think I traveled from the west all the way to the east?."