#twrov

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Moving Forward

Hello everyone. It’s been a long time since I’ve last spoken to you all, and an even longer time since I’ve last updated this story. Over the months and years, my absence has saddened, frustrated, and even angered many of you. Despite my own valid feelings of how—to put it bluntly—I don’t owe any of you anything as this is something I do for free and in my own free time, I still recognize how it must feel for you all to see something you enjoy so much slowly lose momentum and eventually grind to a halt. Furthermore, my habit of making enthusiastic yet empty statements in between didn’t help either. 

As such, a proper and honest explanation is due, as anything less would be unkind. This will be lengthy, but please bear with me. 

For the past four years, it’s been increasingly difficult to find the time, energy, and motivation for me to properly sit down and write. Seemingly gone are the early days of this story’s life when I was able to publish a new chapter every month or so, or even every two weeks when I was at the top of my game in terms of activeness. Even though I had an immense workload due to being a double major in college, leading me to adopt the best work ethic I’ve ever had, I still led a sheltered lifestyle where I didn’t have to worry about the many looming, inevitable adult responsibilities that were ahead of me.

Those tranquil years of course came to an end when I graduated, and I soon felt immense pressure to shift my attention to finding work, living independently, and working on things that would further my career. While I received support as an aspiring writer from the majority of my family, those being my mother and sister, the both of them commented more frequently as time passed by that my “fanfiction” wasn’t something that I should be spending so much time on anymore. After all, it’s not like I could sell the work as my own, and the fact that despite fanfiction absolutely being a valid artform, it wasn’t something that the world of professional employers cared about. 

Nonetheless, when I did eventually find work as a film freelancer, I still tried to persevere and write on the side. My goal back then was to work in film in order to sustain my pursuit in writing. Film was something I went to school for, greatly enjoyed, and even saw a possible future career for myself in, but it was the writing aspect of it that I was truly after, that being primarily screenwriting. 

After two years of living at home, I felt the need to try and live independently as I outgrew my tiny room and my mom started dating a man that I didn’t particularly like. I knew it wasn’t financially smart of me to do so when my mom allowed me to live with her rent-free. But at the time I thought that it would help me to become more mature and productive, as I would have to force myself to work in order to put a roof over my head and food on the table—as opposed to living a sheltered life at home where everything was taken care of for me. Essentially, I was longing for the lifestyle I had in college, thinking that once I returned to it, I would be able to reacquire that once incredible work ethic I had. 

So, I became roommates with a friend from college and together we rented a townhouse together. Rent wasn’t terribly expensive, but it wasn’t cheap either. Regardless, I was able to make ends meet. My greatest challenge however, was to live up to my family’s spoken and unspoken expectations. On one hand, my mother was sweet and understanding, naturally giving me her full support. My father, on the other, always thought that it’d be better for me to pursue something safer and more lucrative, and to not risk being a starving artist. But the one I had to prove myself the most to was my older sister, who was wildly more successful than I was—financially and professionally. My pay compared to hers was like a drop in a bucket, and I felt both indirect and direct pressure from her to be more “professional” like her. Therefore, I threw myself into my work, which is when things slowly began to go downhill. 

As a film freelancer, my work hours usually averaged between 10-12 hours a day, and with my work taking me all over my home state of Maryland and even into neighboring Washington DC and Virginia, my commute time to and from work ranged anywhere from an additional 1-3 hours. It became incredibly common for me to wake up for work anywhere between 3-6 AM and not get home until 8-10 PM. 

Unbeknownst to me at the time, I slowly slipped into a routine where when I did have the “time” to write, I had zero energy or motivation as my work was so taxing. I reached the point where I had to drink two energy drinks with 300mg of caffeine to get myself to and from work. I saw less and less of my roommate and friends. I spent an alarming amount of money and gained weight from ordering take-out so often because I hadn’t the energy to cook for myself when I got home late from work. There would even be days when I fell into what felt like comas, sleeping up to two days straight at one point. My physical, mental, and emotional health was in serious decline. And yet I didn’t see it that way, as I had become obsessed with trying to prove to my family, my sister in particular, that I wasn’t a failure and that my pursuit of writing wasn’t a hopeless one.

During the first month of COVID-19′s outbreak last year, I finally had a much-needed vacation. This was undoubtedly the best time for me to have returned to writing—but I didn’t. At this point, so much time had passed since my last proper writing session that the few times I did try to write, I found myself completely unable to write anything. I was so out of practice and so out of touch with what I had written. This honestly frightened me, and I soon began to doubt if I could ever be able continue the story with the same quality that so many readers fell in love with. Regrettably, I fled from this revelation long enough for a full month to pass by, and I soon found myself busy with yet another distraction: unemployment. 

I was out of work for about 4.5 months, from the middle of March to the beginning of August. During this time, I had to rely on state unemployment, which earned me great scorn from my older sister. Our relationship had always been uneven since we were kids, but it was becoming increasingly toxic as of late since our college years. I felt so ashamed to tell her how much money I made in a year from my job as a film freelancer, and how I barely managed to move to a better position after four years of work. Riddled with guilt and disappointment in myself, when work became readily available again in August, I frantically threw myself back in harder than ever before. In the past where I had turned down the occasional job to give myself some time to relax or in order to make it to a social outing with friends, I now accepted every job thrown my way, only declining those that would make me double-book myself. I earned a lot of money during those months as a result, and I was so happy to finally distance myself from the stigma of being “unemployed.” However, I once again failed to see that I was yet again sliding back into the lifestyle that had been slowly poisoning me for the past two years. 

After essentially working non-stop from August to March, my body, mind, and soul soon returned right back to the brink of collapse. It wasn’t until then at my lowest point when I finally realized how I initially went from working to sustain myself in order to write, to not writing at all and only working to sustain myself to work even more. It was truly scary to see myself fall victim to a brutal cycle of unfulfilling work that could have trapped me for years to come if I hadn’t broken free first. That’s when I realized that my lifestyle was personally unsustainable, and that something had to change. 

Henceforth, I’ve made the difficult decisions to both transition out of film freelancing and to soon return home to live with my father. At the end of April, the homeowner of the townhouse my roommate and I had been living in for close to three years gave us our 30-days-notice to vacate, as they no longer wished to rent but to sell the property. As my roommate had been planning on finding a place of his own with his girlfriend for quite some time, we split amicably at the end of last month in May and I’ve since moved into a temporary apartment with a friend who has traveled back to Maryland for seasonal work. 

Regarding the change in my career, I’ve been looking into applying for writing positions for something that I’ve grown to enjoy over the past few years, which is to write reviews for media such as film, anime, and videogames. This of course is not what I truly want to do in life, but I think that because it actually involves writing, it would be both good practice in terms of practicing my writing and experience in terms of resume-building. Furthermore, a stable “9-5″ job as such would be good for me, I think, as it would introduce some desperately needed structure back into my life. Being a freelancer was definitely fun as I had the power to choose my own schedule, but it unfortunately fostered a lot of laziness and procrastination when I wasn’t completely burnt out. 

I’ve shared with you all this information, a great deal of it being very personal, in the hopes that it helps you better understand who I am as a person and what I’ve been going through these past four years. 

I understand that my word may be difficult to trust due to my history, but I sincerely wish to let you all know from the bottom of my heart that I do plan on continuing writing The White Rose of Vermilion until it’s completed. My fears and insecurities may have alienated me from that promise, but not once did I ever entertain the idea of fully dropping the story. And I promise you, I never will. It most likely will not further my career in any way, bring any revenue in, and will continue to consume a great deal of my precious free time—yet I still choose to pursue continuing it because I can’t see a future where I don’t finish it.

It is after all my most cherished project; the reason that I was able to truly find my calling as an aspiring writer, its success also ultimately being the proof to my mother that I had some skill as a budding writer, who then gave me her full blessings to pursue it as a career. But most important of all is that it’s the reason why I was able to experience first-hand one of the most important and beautiful discoveries in my entire life. That being the incredible phenomenon of how art is like a beacon—its bright light is powerful enough to reach out and inspire others to create art of their own. From Monty Oum to Nancy Phetchareune to myself, I was blessed enough to see readers create wonderful fanart to show me or tell me in a review that reading my story had inspired them to create something of their own.

I am officially leaving behind my prolonged hiatus and returning to working on The White Rose of Vermilion. While I am extremely hesitant to even estimate when the next chapter will be published, please know that I am genuinely trying to leave behind my habits of old and returning to a more consistent schedule. 

The White Rose of Vermilion will return in:

Arc II, Chapter Twenty-Seven: Stranger in the Night

[thanotosomega]

Petition to rename The White Rose of Vermilion Ruby to Desert, because of how thirsty she makes Weiss,

[idiot-son-doing-their-best]

So I read White Rose of Vermilion and now I’m empty and just reading other White Rose fanfics to fill the void while I wait for an update and my standards are way too high because I read TWROV first

[therodrigator6]

The White Rose of Vermillion

So! A god while ago I had made some art for a fav fic of mine called “The White Rose of Vermillion”

And I found it again today as I was searching through my files, and I decided to re-do it!

@thewhiteroseofvermilion Hope ya Like it!

[lahpiki]

re-draw of this even tho i did it like yesterday but hey i wanted to color it

(psst look @thewhiteroseofvermilion )

[sorryoutofrice]

chestnuts roosting on an open fire

psydragon this isnt what we talked about(maybe) but i wanted to draw it anyway there are totally chestnuts in there psh

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

So since quarantine, I've had a lot more free time so I drew this for ya, oh and also hope your doing well.

#I stayed up all night drawing this and I have no regrets lol #who needs to sleep anyways

Love the super saturated background and Ruby's off-screen gaze. It's always so incredible to see different artists' interpretation of what she looks like, especially in her new Sentry armor. 

I apologize for publishing this so late, but I really am grateful that you took the time to create this and share it with me.

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Story Synopsis: Medieval AU where Ruby spends her days as a huntress, hunting wild game to support herself and her older sister Yang, a blacksmith. They live humble lives until one pivotal decision drags them and the ones they love into a deadly game of shadows where the Grimm aren’t the only enemies.

Chapter Preview: Lutolf Schnee made another round through the small garden. Abundant with lush and beautiful flowers, the heart of it all was an old Yggdago tree. Rooted in the middle of the garden, its vast age could easily be distinguished by the massive sprawling roots that led to where younger trees had sprouted. A species native only to the forests of Duodon, they were as culturally important to its people as were the Leidbaum trees of Forever Fall to the people of Weischandel. Circling the old tree, he sadly regarded the numerous ribbons tied to branches. Written on them were poems and prayers—left there to remember and honor the dead.

[Start from the beginning] [Chapter Twenty-Six]

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Been really busy with work, but making good progress! I’d say I’m maybe ¾ done with this chapter, but I’ve been stuck on one scene in particular that has been really incredibly difficult to write properly.

Chapter will be out THIS MONTH OF AUGUST DEFINITELY!

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

A little teaser from the upcoming chapter, titled: Reconnaissance.

~~~

So tired was she that even when a hand lightly squeezed her shoulder, it wasn’t enough to bring her back to her senses. Nodding heavily now, she caught quick glimpses of her surroundings every time her mind did its best to bring her out of the heavy sleep she was spiraling down into; two strong arms guiding her feet to the foot board of the bed, a blanket pulled out beneath her, then tucked neatly below her chin. The sensation of a hand running through her hair came soon after, and she felt her head lifted just high enough for a pillow to snugly catch her fall. Finally, a warm palm caressed her cheek.

The last time she managed to open her eyes, the little huntress could have sworn she caught glimpse of golden hair and jeweled purple eyes. Ruby gently leaned against the palm before closing her eyes.

She missed this.

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Not to be rude but it's been almost a year since the last update, is one coming soon?

Not rude at all. 

As some of you may know, I’ve been spending more of my free time on trying to establish a Youtube presence. It’s been a goal of mine in recent years to build some sort of secondary income, to supplement my main income from Film Freelance (I recently left my second job as a teacher). This unfortunately plays a role in why I further distanced myself from writing TWRoV in recent years and instead tried to pursue a platform on Youtube.

While Youtube stuff is fun and I enjoy it, I only realized recently that not only is it burning me out mentally, it also doesn’t really lead anywhere; at least with TWRoV, I’m sharpening my skills as a writer and storyteller whereas with Youtube I’m touching up mostly just my video editing and photoshop skills. 

I yearn for a time when I wrote a chapter every two weeks or so, and now it’s been months…almost a year. All of this shocks and hurts me deeply, and I understand that I need to change before it’s too late; before I myself genuinely lose my story forever and readers like you move on permanently. 

I’m taking a month-long hiatus this summer by spending some time with my sister in California. I’ll be traveling with just a tablet and all my TWRoV notes, so as I try to do some soul-searching, I’ll be sure to write as well. 

I will be doing my best to have a chapter out some time in July. 

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

While the idea of physical books is sheer fantasy for now, I can’t help but think...

Artwork by @lahpiki. Full image here.

Also I’m not dead! I’ve neen working on the next chapter, slowly but surely. Hopefully I can publish it in time for TWRoV’s 5-Year-Anniversary. We’ll see. 

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Story Synopsis: Medieval AU where Ruby spends her days as a huntress, hunting wild game to support herself and her older sister Yang, a blacksmith. They live humble lives until one pivotal decision drags them and the ones they love into a deadly game of shadows where the Grimm aren’t the only enemies.

Chapter Preview: Wearing a flowing white cape with a red interior that matched her father's, Weiss also wore a sharp white military uniform. It was absent of any medals or sashes however, with only a small black-outlined Schnee family insignia patch sewn over her left breast and a pair of red ornamental shoulder pieces. Even though she rode elegantly, stoically even, there wasn't a trace of the overconfidence and sadistic delight in the eyes of the girl who arrested her and publicly humiliated her. 

As Weiss approached them, Ruby noticed her looking in her direction. She instinctively lowered her head and took a step back, assuming that it was Pyrrha that she was looking for. When she sensed no movement from the commander, she looked back up only to find that it was clear that heiress' eyes were on her—only her.

[Start from the beginning] [Chapter Twenty-Four] [Patreon]

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Teaser: Chapter Twenty-Four

From The White Rose of Vermilion’s next chapter: “The Southern Fortress.”

“Perhaps you’d even be a wolf.”

“Aye, a wolf she is.” The last of the group to go, Cardin flipped his gift up into the air so that when it landed back into his hand, its handle was pointed towards her. “You’ve got enough fangs and teeth to frighten anybody. But one more wouldn’t hurt, would it?”

Taking the leather sheath from him, Ruby pulled out a gleaming dagger. Despite its small size, it was crafted expertly nonetheless. “How much did this cost?”

The miner physically waved the question off. “That’s not important. What’s important is you being able to defend yourself at all times.” His fingers tightened around the war-scythe to the point where his knuckles cracked. “If you’re in danger, I want you to stick this into the heart of anything or anyone too stupid to realize they’ve fucked with the wrong girl.”

Sheathing the dagger, she held it over her own heart. “I pray I won’t ever have to use it.”

“As do I,” Cardin said before beginning to cry.

Hastily tucking it away, she jumped into his arms and squeezed as tightly as she could.

[thewhiteroseofvermilion]

Chapter is up! Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays, everyone ;w;

Will make a formal update post later today after I get some sleep

[lahpiki]

TWRoV is still my fav fanfic and it will always be, love u @thewhiteroseofvermilion