#two of a kind diaries | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

andreal831 · 5 months ago

Note

Can you rank all the fathers of TVDU?

Ranking of TVDU Fathers, Worst to Best:

14. Giuseppe Salvatore

Giuseppe did almost nothing redeemable as a father. He emotional and physically abused his family and then killed them when they tried to help the vampires. At no point did it seem like he loved his children. Maybe when he tried to stop Damon from running out to save Katherine, but even that felt more like a reflex than fatherly affection. There's literally nothing positive I can think to say about him which puts him at the very bottom.

13. Joshua Parker

Similar to Giuseppe, Joshua does very little to show love for any of his kids, let alone Kai. I also always have wondered where the Parker parents were as their children were running for their lives from Kai. Jo was stabbed in the stomach as she attempted to save them, but no parent came to help.

Joshua always put the the coven over his own children. He gets points over Giuseppe because I think he did care about his children, other than Kai, but just cared about the coven more. Still a terrible father who was willing to risk his children for the good of the coven.

12. Mikael

Mikael was awful, but he isn't the worst simply because, at some point, he did care for his children. All of them, including Klaus. He beat and abused them in his own twisted way to make them stronger so he wouldn't lose them like he lost Freya. He went about it in a terrible way, partly we can blame on his own upbringing and the time they lived, but then he spent a thousand years hunting down his children and tormenting them. While his main goal was Klaus, he still was willing to kill the rest of them for standing by Klaus.

None of this justifies his behavior, but he gets points over the other fathers simply for caring to some extent about his children.

11. Richard Lockwood

Yet another toxic masculine father who emotionally and physically abuses his child. Richard is Mikael if he had been born in the 20th Century. Richard is such a great example of an abusive parent because he is closer to what we see in reality. He is a textbook narcissist who could charm the whole town while abusing his son in the shadows. Tyler and Carol were better off after he died.

These bottom four are honestly all interchangeable. They are all the same character, just different fonts.

10. Bill Forbes

Bill not only tortured his daughter but also abandoned her before she became the thing he hated. While Liz initially is scared of Caroline, she comes around and protects her daughter from Bill. While Bill comes around at the very end of his life, he never apologizes for torturing her or trying to kill her. He potentially could have been a better father if he had lived longer, but during his life, he was pretty terrible.

9. John Gilbert

Yes, John sucks. But not because he wanted to keep Elena away from vampires. That actually moves him up the list. He sucks because of his lack of involvement in Elena's life. It's fine that he wasn't ready to have a child when Isobel got pregnant, but the fact that he didn't bother stepping up, even as Uncle John, when Elena and Jeremy lost their parents really shows his character. Then when he did get invovled, all he wanted to do was control her.

He does end up sacrificing his life for Elena, which also earns him so points. For the most part, he was an absentee father, but he showed up at the end when it mattered.

8. Klaus Mikaelson

While Klaus is typically viewed as one of the best parents in TVDU, there is a lot to be desired. Especially when you actually focus on his first child, Marcel. Klaus made the decision to adopt Marcel and then continued to throw it in his face, even getting angry at Marcel for succeeding in his control over New Orleans.

With Hope, we do see him be more loving, but this love tends to come off as controlling and possessive. Klaus is so worried about being a bad father to Hope, clearly showing us he didn't view himself as Marcel's father or his understanding that he was a bad father to Marcel. He then proceeds to put himself over Hope's needs for most of her life. Ending with him, unnecessarily, sacrificing himself when Hope needed him most.

I did have trouble placing him since he does seem to want to do right by Hope, which is more than most of the fathers on this list. So he gets points because he does love his children (bare minimum) and would do a lot for them, but at the end of the day, his narcissism wins out.

I'm including a link to a longer discussion I've had regarding Klaus here.

7. Jackson Kenner

Jackson was a good stepfather to Hope, but he could have been a better father. There were numerous times that he walked out on Hope and Hayley, including one time when he calls Mary in without letting Hayley know he is leaving Hope. Jackson tended to hold the Mikaelsons against Hope. He definitely loved her, but he often viewed his role as her babysitter rather than a father. We never really get a moment between Hope and Jackson where it is clear he views her as anything other than Hayley's daughter.

Jackson and Klaus are fairly tied, but at least Jackson never murdered anyone in front of her or tortured her mother. They both love their children, but hold things over their children that aren't necessarily fair. They also both let their pride get in the way of what is best for the child, creating more instability in the child's life.

I go more into this discussion here.

6. Rudy Hopkins

Rudy essentially abandoned Bonnie after Abby had already abandoned Bonnie, leaving her in the hands of Grams because he didn't like witchcraft. He only comes back when Carol dies and they ask him to be mayor. While he does say he agreed to take the position to be close to Bonnie, it seems odd since he's been missing from her life for years, even after Grams died. But when he comes back, he is probably the most present parent we get outside of Liz.

Rudy tries to protect Bonnie from the supernatural world and even herself, trying to stop her from harming herself to help her friends. He does lose some points for abandoning her and trying to control her, but at the same time she was just a teenager so I get him wanting to protect her from the supernatural. I hated that he never even knew Bonnie was dead since they had been rebuilding their relationship. The scene of him being killed broke my heart for Bonnie.

He is leagues better than most of the fathers on this list simply for loving his daughter and showing her how proud he was of her. I mean, he was one of like two parents at graduation (granted most of them were dead at this point).

5. Alaric Saltzman

This is a hard one, mainly because I've not fully watched Legacies. I did once love Alaric with his relationship with Jeremy and Elena. He stepped up just because of his relationship with Jenna, but it was clear he cared for them outside of that. He stuck around after Jenna was killed and even was still there for them when Jenna needed a break. However, he doesn't seem to carry that same loyalty to his own children.

While I have issues with how he treated Caroline in TVD in the last couple of seasons, it was clear he would do anything for the twins. But then in Legacies, from what I've seen, he seems to prioritize Hope over his children. He runs the school and barely helps his own children feel comfortable, let alone the others kids. My theory was always that it was his way of getting the last win over Klaus. He stepped in and raised her to be his weapon, which he knew Klaus would hate. Even his relationship with Hope seems problematic.

He's fairly high on the list for his behavior in TVD but loses massive points for his behavior in Legacies.

4. Declan

I'll be honest, the timeline with Declan confuses me a lot. It seemed like Hayley and Declan were still in early stages of dating, yet he seemed to have a long relationship with Hope. This could make sense if Hayley and him had started off friends, but Hayley breaking up with him in order to focus on Hope confuses me more. If he was so invovled in Hope's life, this wouldn't be necessary and I would think he would have reacted differently, like trying to get invovled with Hope. But season 5 is terrible writing so moving on.

It does seem that he was an active father figure to Hope. Likely the only one she really remembered. From his conversation with Klaus, it sounds like he's known Hope for a few years at least and was still invovled in her life while she was away at school, even teaching her to drive. Hope also is very protective of Declan, showing how much she cares for him. I wish he would have been more focused on Hope after Hayley died, I get he just lost his girlfriend, but as a father figure, he should have stepped up for her because lord knows no one did.

I honestly ranked him this high more for what the show wanted him to be rather than what they allowed him to be. Season 5 was too short to bring in another father figure for Hope when they could have just used Alaric to make Klaus jealous. But, Declan gets extreme points for being willing to fight Elijah and Klaus to protect Hope.

3. Father Kieran

Kieran may not have been their parent, but it is clear he stepped up and took care of Cami and her twin brother. And then when they lost Sean, he helped Cami through her grief. In his last moments, he spent them trying to protect Cami.

While he valued his role in the city, he valued Cami more. Even threatening the vampires to stay away from her. I only wish he would have told Cami the truth when she confided in him that she was losing her mind.

2. Jonas Martin

The Martin family deserved so much better. Jonas had a moral code, but he had to bend it to "rescue" his daughter. He would do anything for his children and proved it time and time again. Losing Luka broke him and I'm almost thankful that he died before finding out his daughter was willingly working for Klaus. Even in his anger he was still focused on saving his children, restoring Bonnie's powers and telling her how to defeat Klaus.

My only issue is that he seemed to put Luka in jeopardy in order to rescue Greta. But he was desperate to save his child, so I can understand it.

1. Marcel Gerard

I love an accidental father and Marcel is the perfect example. He rescued Davina and took her in, yes partly because he wanted a powerful witch, but he grew to love her and became incredibly protective over her. My only complaint is that he seemed to pull away at times and leave Davina to her own devices when she definitely needed a parental figure or some adult guidance. But I love that he made Vincent step up when he couldn't.

Marcel would do anything for Davina and he proved it. He went up against his own family for her. He protected her from their enemies. He loved her no matter what she did, even when he disagreed with her. They have one of the best bonds in TO. I wish we could have seen more of them in season 5 or in Legacies.

Honorable Mentions

Vincent Griffith - Vincent losing his child is not discussed enough. But even though he couldn't be a father to his own child, he stepped up for Davina. He even was a surrogate for Freya and Keelin (I'll always be confused by that). I just know he is actively invovled in that child's life. Ansel - I didn't put him in the main list because we don't actually see him interact with Klaus much. Yes, we can say he was clearly protective of Klaus when Esther brought him back and theorize how he would have been as a father, but it's just a theory. People like to blame Esther for keeping Klaus from Ansel, but he was right there watching as Mikael raised and abused Klaus. He never once stepped in. Yes, I understand there are reasons and have even defended Esther's decision to keep it all a secret. But we can't blame Esther and not also hold Ansel responsible for Klaus' childhood. Grayson Gilbert - I mentioned Miranda in the other post so I felt I had to bring up Grayson. We, again, don't know much about him. His children clearly loved him, but his torturing supernatural makes me question if he would have reacted the same way Bill had. Katherine's Father - Forcing his daughter to give away her child is awful. Yes, it may be a sign of the times, however, he still sucks. Hayley's Father - We also don't know much about him so I'll just repeat what I said about Hayley's mom. He agreed to his daughter's arranged marriage when she was an infant and that he sacrificed his life to protect Hayley. From what we are told, it seemed like Hayley's parents were on the right side of the war, but it is hard to say. Matt and Vicki's Father - We don't know who their father is, but I don't think it's fair to judge Kelly for being terrible without at least mentioning him. He also sucks. August Sienna - We also don't see August ever interact with his children, but the fact that he is raising them in a cult is a red flag. Elijah Mikaelson - No, Elijah was never a father, but his siblings/parents definitely pushed him into that role early on. Elijah had the potential to be a good father, we see this in the few moments he had early on with Marcel. However, his love for his siblings blinds him and makes him do terrible things while allowing his siblings to do terrible things. Not a great disciplinarian.

17 notes · View notes

that1valiantcougar · 13 days ago

Text

Reflections on Fanart

Ever since you’ve held a pencil, you’ve done it. In fact, it’s what got you into art in the first place.

Since then, you have spent thousands of hours holed up in your room, drawing fictional characters and scenarios. But now, as you look back, more than a decade since starting, and then look much, much forward, you find yourself asking; is it worth it?

At first, the thought is an annoying mosquito who is just trying to ruin your fun. But is that what it is? Is this what fun is? Because more often than not, you get frustrated because you cannot capture the character like you want to, you get embarrassed because everyone looks at you a bit strange for being so involved in fiction this way, and you cry at the scenarios you put these characters through.

Worse, you feel guilt for indulging in reading, writing, and drawing these fanworks because all of that time could’ve been spent curating your own world, your own characters. Take all of those hours you have spent hunched over in your bed, at your desk, sketching the same characters, and instead put it towards your career, or exercise, or even towards your own original works.

That’s what it is, isn’t it? The guilt of wasting time by working so hard and so long on things that may very well not stand the test of time. These characters have a story. They have a background. What about the characters in your own imagination? Do they have traits? Do they have history? Do they even have a face? Do you even remember their names?

It goes further than that. The shame. Anytime someone wants to look at your art, someone who isn’t within your closest sphere, you have to tell them no, because what would they say about the art you are making of the characters they may know? What you make is not… Inappropriate. But it’s intimate. It’s fragile. And somehow, that’s what makes it so much worse. They view it as off-putting. “These characters aren’t meant to be gay,” “these characters don’t cry.” And it hurts, because your work is a reflection of you. But is it even your work? These characters, you’ve drawn them, but you have not made them.

They are not yours.

The reclusion is another thing, and perhaps it is slightly unrelated to the fanart, but maybe it is. Again, you spend hours upon hours writing, reading and drawing about these characters. So that includes spending thousands of hours alone, in your room and away from society. Perhaps it acts as a feedback loop. You isolate yourself so much, to protect yourself from scrutiny, and in doing so you end up creating this parasitic relationship between yourself and these fictional characters. They mean so much to you. They’re on your walls, in your sketchbooks, in your mind and in your heart. They’ve infected you. But was it them? Or is it a virus you injected into yourself?

Or maybe, instead, it’s a coping mechanism.

You are incredibly empathetic. You feel things so vividly and heavily that you often cry at even just the thought of things. And because of this, when you watch shows, you grow emotionally attached to characters that catch your attention. And you suddenly want them to feel love, to feel pain, to exist in a world different from their own, but still remain the same character. You feel disconnected from everyone else around you, because they say these stories are “fake”, there’s no reason to feel so deeply for these figments. But you do. And, perhaps, the reason you want these characters to feel these things, is because you do not feel them yourself.

You live vicariously through them.

You draw these characters holding each other, kissing, crying together, bleeding out in agony and being patched up– is that, perhaps something you yearn for? You are so fragile. And your heart is made of glass. You obsess over this fictional romance and intimacy, but when faced with the opportunity yourself, you become so afraid. You withdraw, so scared of letting them in. Is it because you have this idealized sense of love in your head now? Obscured and inflated and turned unrealistic through the very characters you have devoted yourself to? Is the real love, the one full of awkward moments, of misunderstandings, of learning boundaries too much for you?

But, no. That doesn’t make sense either.

Because you are obsessed with seeing these characters in realistic scenarios that often give cringe-worthy second-hand embarrassment. You revel when they stutter over their words, trip and make a fool out of themself. So what’s the big deal?

By putting yourself in the scenario you’ve put the characters through, you will no longer have time for them. You will no longer have the insatiable desire to fill your sketchbooks with tenderness and love and friendship and compassion– because you will finally have it yourself.

And that’s the scary thing, isn’t it?

Letting go. Letting these characters exist in a fictional vacuum. They were never existent to begin with anyways. And that prospect, it looks and sounds like freedom. Instead of seeing the same thing over and over again in your sketchbooks, you will see something new, and something you. But, for well over half your life now, you have relied so incredibly heavily on these fictional characters to carry you through your struggles in life. Through social anxiety, depression and medical diagnoses. Letting them go is letting go of comfort. Of stability. Of your nest that you have created and compiled through years and years of devotion.

It is the death of something that was never living in the first place.

And that’s a thought that brings us around again. You have spent so many years fixated on things that do not exist. Things that, in the grand scheme of things, mean absolutely nothing. And the guilt comes back. Because while you have been slouched over your desk, lounging in your bed, others have been forming meaningful relationships with each other. They’ve cultivated their own original stories and characters. They don’t feel trapped in this pit they’ve dug themselves in, looking around and seeing the same thing over and over again. You claimed that you have this insatiable desire to create, to do, and not consume, but fanart is hardly a creation.

Fanart can only happen after deep consumption.

You fell for the trap. You fell right into their clutches, and now not only have you spent your delicate, fleeting and precious time, you’ve spent money on these characters. You are a consumer. Perhaps the worst kind, because you are devoted. You are, in some way, addicted. And you’re too afraid to let go. But you’re growing older. You’re finding out that life isn’t what you thought it was. You’re finding out that the finish line, the dark abyss of death, while very small right now, is crawling closer and closer as every second ticks by. And when you look back at all that you have done so far, do you really want anyone looking at what you’ve made? At what you’ve replicated? Because you aren't the original source, at the end of the day, as hard as that is to come to terms with. So I ask again;

Is it worth it?

You’re unsure now more than ever, especially now that you’re about to receive a degree to teach children. Children are ruthless, what if they find out about your “addiction”? Well, perhaps it’s not as bad as some other addictions. You could be doing alcohol, drugs, self-harm to cope, but you don’t. It seems a bit awful to compare obsessing over non-existent characters to life-shortening addictions. And then you think, are you even qualified to teach children when you yourself are still so juvenile at heart, your love so dedicated to fiction?

It’s depressing, when you think too hard about it.

These characters, the ones who have held you afloat for so long, may be the ones that are drowning you now. Now that you have survived to adulthood, now that you are gaining responsibilities faster than you can remember them. Now that you are having fears you never expected to have, like developing carpal tunnel and being unable to do the very thing that gives your life so much purpose. Even if you pinned the blame on them, on fanart, it would be meaningless. You can’t blame the air for tripping over your own feet.

So… What now?

Now that you have come to this sobering realization that all that you have done, all that you have loved, is meaningless, what do you do? Do you cry? Do you laugh at the joke your entire life has become? Or do you go back into fandoms and ignore the dark, looming presence of reality that will sit over your head for the rest of time? If this is an addiction, should you detox, and truly get rid of everything once and for all? Do you donate and sell all of your figures that you’ve spent years accumulating? Do you tear down the posters and artwork that decorate your walls? Time is unpredictable. Time is fleeting. Will you continue to indulge in something that you have realized you have used to avoid the outside world? Or will you give it all up and turn a new page, one blank. One waiting to be filled.

Or maybe you do something in the middle.

You won’t do anything extreme. You care about these figures, even if they are just pretty looking pieces of plastic mass produced in a factory somewhere in China. You still care about these characters that will never love you as much as you love them, so you shouldn’t abandon them either. But, perhaps, you will be more self-aware from now on. Step out of your room for longer periods of time. Spend time with the friends you’ve somehow managed to obtain despite being so dreadfully reclusive. Realize that there is more to your abilities than fanart. Your mind and imagination is vast, and it has served its purpose well for the fandoms you’ve perused. But perhaps…

Perhaps it's finally time to start writing your own story. Perhaps it’s time to move on in life, urged on and encouraged by the art you’ve created. Because on the page, it was never them.

It was always you.

You always drew yourself in your art, whether you were aware of it or not. In the end, even after all this time, after jumping from character to character, situation to situation, it was always you.

Keep creating what you love, but also remember to create things that come from what truly matters. You. Your life. Your love. Create and love creation for what it is, not what it manifests itself as.

#fanart #rambles #essays #self love #I just have a lot of thoughts I've been struggling with #I wonder if anyone else feels the same #I wrote this two years ago #decided to post it in case someone is feeling similarly #Val's rambles #is this a diary entry? kind of #anyways I love you guys

2 notes · View notes