#two and a half hours away?
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Last minute beach trip whoooo
#i am in so much pain but i need to see the ocean like i'm some sort of tuberculosis patient#it's only like#two and a half hours away?#which i promise you is absolutely nothing in texan distance measuring#also parking is free on sundays#i'm just gonna sit there and turn off my thoughts for a little bit#except for the gay ones obvs#also maybe go to that denny's where i experienced the most intense secondhand embarrassment of my entire life
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everything happens so much
#ooc#life update: my dad's cancer came back and my sister's dog died#and I was so stressed I grit my teeth too hard and fractured one of them#so if I seem strange. please understand. im two bad days away from turning inside out#of course im trying to rest. and this fucking skunk rolls up and just#poses outside my window cooler for a half hour until i ended up getting out of bed. christ
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me n who ?!?!?!? ME N WHO GUYS ...
picrews: 1 2 3 4
mking silly girlfailure picrews are the only thing saving my sanity which took quite a number of blows today ( its hanging on by the measliest thread but i think its better to consider it go n e )
anyways i wanna make a silly tag game so we are going to make a silly tag game because in the wise words of martin luther king i think wait it was probably gandhi "be the change you wish to see in the world" arent i so cool guys im taking like the first step forward and :stareyes: ahahah
(no pressure) tags !! 🏷️ : @cienxpidity, @ilyuu, @anonbinaryweirdo, @suntoru, @tuesdayberries, @lume-nosity, @mrcrazyvillainvillainn, @ceneid, @amalythea, @xianyoon, @aeon-yao, @ryuryuryuyurboat, @auroratumbles, @snobwaffles, @the-white-void + everyone i probably forgot to tag (SPS IM SORRY) n anyone else whod like to join !!
#💬 ⌗ 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭'𝐬 𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 . . . ✧#i was in a very silly mood ( mental breakdown ish ) i cried like 16 times in the past hour and that's probably not a good thing but HEY#its fine#im so fine#im so#im so...#*perishes*#begone negativity#its time for me and my delusions#speaking of delusions i actually had the WILDEST Dream last night#and its so crazy because its like the first dream I've had in the past year that's not about a fictional character#yes im pathtetic#carrying on#and i was like escaping from t h e. m a. n i n t he. h a l l w a y#and i was like runnning away yk and then shrek comes over and helps me out by defenestrating me and so i land in some bushes and then start#like putting candy into a bag??? and im like HURRY UP SHREK HES GONNA COME AFTER US#and then i got to this like cult area#where it splits into two paths and i remember it so vividly because there was this gate security and i had to type in my student id to get#and so it opens up to this room and there's two pathways#the one to the right has this giant ass shrine golden statue surrounded by a bunch of children#and the one i go to has little cube spaces caved into the walls for like little decorations and a stair for like a lower other half of the#room#and theres a bunch of children and my irls#and so we break outta there yk#we escape#we get out#and we run into like osme shopping place#and my friend is planning to abandon me with her other friend and they're running away to china#but they refuse to take me with them (ultimate betrayal)#HELP edit but the tags didnt show up cause there were too many...
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#kirby#daily kirby#my art#digital#hal laboratory#nintendo#it was a hard day today.#sometimes you just gotta cry for an hour about requiring significant assistance to do basic stuff that you don't actually have help with rn!#(my wife is working 6 12s at a job we had to move across the country for)#(which means 1 she is *exhausted* at *all* times and struggling to even meet her own needs)#(and 2 our other partner and all our family and friends are. multiple days away by car. so they can't come help.)#it's getting hard to even stick leftovers in the microwave for myself but no one else is able to cook for me.#it sucks.#(we're moving again in june because this was a 1-year position from the beginning)#(and the idea is for our other partner to move in with us which will help a lot)#(plus my wife should be switching to a reliably 5-day week at that time)#(but we don't know where we're going for another month and a half.)#(so we can't really do any groundwork or anything to make that happen.)#(and having zero agency other than sitting and waiting and getting worse alone Really Sucks!)#I guess this is a bit of a secret part two to yesterday's meducation lol#favorites
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"Like lovers entwined...I know for the last time; you will not be mine. So give me the night, the night, the night."
#had another sob session to this because even though it's still literally half a year away it hit me that I get to hear that live#and sing it with 20k other people#I get to experience those last five whole minutes#dude my post-concert depression is going to be terrible#but at the same time I think I'll enjoy basking in the light they give off. even if it's only for an hour or two#sleep token#st#euclid#song euclid#sleep token tmbte#tmbte#take me back to eden#melitunes#Spotify
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Strangest date experience?
FUN QUESTION probably this guy i went on a date with back in august? september? Idk but he lied about where he was from bc he was from my hometown and thought it'd be weird if he told me over text so he didnt tell me until we went on the date ?? Idk that was odd and then he kept on commenting on how young i looked and how he thought i was lying about my age on the app but still asked me out anyways?? 😭 that was a little strange too!
#FORGOT TO ADD he drove TWO AND A HALF HOURS to go on this date with me#another i guess is for my first kiss last year the guy went straight into making out and choked me LOL..#surprised me so much i had to pull away to laugh awkwardly cuz wtf#zoey answers
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I GOT A SETLIST!!! 🫨 ALSO NOBODY’S SOLDIER DEBUT!!!!
one of his crew members handed a few out and it looked like that was it, and then he walked up and pulled something out of his pocket and put it in my hands, and it was another setlist 😭😭😭
it was brutally hot in the crowd and i’ve literally never sweat so much in my life, but hozier was magical ✨ and somehow i managed to get barricade thanks to some nice girls in front of me <3
*he didn’t play unknown even tho it was on the setlist and he ended ten minutes early :(
#i was in shock when he put that setlist in my hands lol#we saw hozier’s post about nobody’s soldier ‘coming soon’ in the crowd 30 min before his set and we were like 👀👀👀#AND HE PLAYED IT#unfortunately my night ended with me getting on the wrong train and ending up alone in a random city an hour and a half away at 1am 😭😭😭😭😭#it sure fucking looked like track 2 and TWO conductors looked at my ticket and ushered me to that train!!#they don’t announce the stops at night and my stop is last so i don’t worry about counting#so i didn’t realize it was the wrong train until i was soooo far away 😭#there were no more trains so i had to call my poor parents to come get me 😭#really wish i didn’t have that memory attached to the concert 🙃
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I would like to both thank and blame tumblr for the phrase "turn slow tigers into fast tigers with this one neat trick!" Like, I am grateful for it as a mnemonic that stuck that reminds me to go punch the punching bag* when I get too stressed out and can't function well from acute stress, but also I can no longer refer to it any other way because when I get that stressed I have trouble with words Which means today I was putting on my wrap gloves and my brother was looking at me like "what are you doing?" and all I could say was "turning slow tigers into fast tigers" *I think the original post was about taking a short run or tensing all your muscles and then releasing them? But my response to stress is very much not flight lol
#the person behind the yarn#it worked though!! and he's on tumblr so he knew what I meant#are they called wrap gloves? wrist wraps?? hand wraps???#the wraps like you'd wear under boxing gloves but in glove form themselves instead of a long strip of fabric#and with padding on the knuckles#back before I got sick I used to do what was pretty much MMA sparring#in that that was not the specific style we were learning but once a week we had sparring hour#and like half the people that came were MMA dudes#which also means I can say (I find this hilarious but my sister doesn't)#I have only been punched in the face by three people: a toddler. my sister. and a professional MMA fighter#that dude got SO MUCH GRIEF from the rest of the class for even barely hitting my face. it was hilarious#I was probably the youngest person in the sparring group by well over a decade they were super nice#today was my first time hitting the punching bag in like...8-9 months?#I stayed away from it while I was anemic because that seemed a bad idea#and it was great!!! my new meds meant I could use the punching bag for more than like two minutes at a time!#and it didn't skyrocket my heart rate!!! or at least not as badly!!!#so I think I will get back into using it more often
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Brb gotta just yell into the void
#GOD IM JUST#so both Q and I were under the impression we would be getting help fixing the place#almost a full week later#it’s basically just been me his elderly grandma and him when hes not working#which is very little time since he’s full time#I have been working on this place from basically sunrise to sunset#doing what I can to make it clean and repaint#but I can’t do most repairs#mainly what the bathroom needs#but today#ooooooo today#Q’s parents are getting on our nerves man#we’ve been trying to explain that the bathroom is not functional in it’s current state#and instead of Q’s father#the landlord of this place who decided keeping it while living two and a half hours away was a smart idea#helping to fix said bathroom#says he’d rather work on the living room floor which is the lowest priority#and when we expressed this to them#his mother goes#if you don’t like it you can go live somewhere else#EXCUSE ME#I have literally been spending all the time I can trying to fix up YOUR place for you two#to the point where I am now coming down with a cold and my lowing back is killing me#where Q is sacrificing every free moment he has trying to do what he can while working a full time job#and THIS is the thanks we get???????#what the hell#anyway they’re coming tomorrow but Q has work so I am going to cry#I am so exhausted and stressed if they pull some shit I might just do something I shouldn’t#I want this to be over#the second were able to afford a house we’re getting the hell out of here
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ddcds. for u (hopefully ur day will b a bit better!)
had to take a second to respond to this because dear GOD this made me lose coherent thoughts. ahem
#asks#ddcd#i. i want to start up a good feral tag ramble but the only thing i can think of is to break down wailing /pos#my friend. beloved acquaintance of mine. you canNOT keep doing this one day you will fuckinf kill me of heart attack on the spot#i keep stepping away from this every couple minutes i haven’t felt this much emotions in eons. please have the courtesy to picture-#-my tone as that of soft awe. i am barely forming comprehensible sentences out here dear god#i’d also like to mention that i am in love with how you draw carapace. it all flows very smoothly and feels correct in an indescribable-#fuck the tumblr tag limit#-sort of manner.#your expressions are immaculate and manage to perfectly encapsulate these two#just. everything in general makes me even more fascinated with. well. [gestures abstractly]#please be ever so kind as to excuse me while i yell into a pillow for half an hour. i will be delivering you all of my money-#-as compensation for this on the morrow. thank you#fave
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Rehearsal today was funny because the weather was absolute shit and half way through a run out director was like "CUT guys this is one of the worst runs of this I have ever seen" and we were all shaking on the field like uhhh yeah dude it's because the hail is almost as big as grapes rn...
#and the WIND#the FUCKING. WIND.#i was so distracted bc i looked over and my friend threw a toss and the flag was RIPPED AWAY by the wind and#hit a clarinet player in the head#so anyway we literally did the same thing over and over for two and a half hours
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The penalty for naughty roosters who try to jump the fence is that they have to take a mugshot with me! This time it’s Sascha, who was trying to run from Jack when he jumped on top of the run and then made me chase him all around the garage, all while screaming bloody murder. Roosters are so dramatic! Oh well, he’s grown into quite the handsome young man with mighty wattles, although he still has long spindly legs and big pretty brown eyes!
#I think he might have some leghorn or even Spanish rooster in him#idk he has kind of a fiery fierce look about him now…his name doesn’t really fit him anymore#I named him after an OC that’s elegant and demure lol#he may even get a name change if he stops being so shy and scared of hens lol#his and Pluto’s relationship is so fascinating you could make a whole drama anime about it#they’re like the two childhood friends who grew up together and have a ‘special bond’#and the showrunners won’t admit they’re in love but it’s obvious to everyone but them#they’re fighting over the same girl - Muppet- but they love each other the most#I said anime bc I swear I see this trope all the time and I don’t watch regular tv anymore#seriously though they spend like half an hour tidbitting for each other today#and when Sascha was screaming when I was trying to catch him Pluto came running to Sascha right away#this is all just me being silly btw I know it’s anthropomorphizing and stuff#it’s my duty to tease my sons after all
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Back on my meds, making a damn decent paycheck despite how many days I had to take off this month, my mom’s feeling better now that she’s home and we’ve figured everything out, our neighbor’s gonna build us a wheelchair ramp for cheap, and my dad miiiiiiiiight be buying a new car as we speak 🤞 (my mom just can’t get into the truck anymore, and she hasn’t wanted to drive her two seater for a while now, so we’re trading it for something practical). Things are finally going fairly well, all things considered ❤️
#she speaks#after the absolute hell we’ve been in all October I think we deserve a fucking break#hopefully this post doesn’t jinx the car lol#we’re keeping the truck obv cuz like we got livestock#but the lil beamer has got to go unfortunately#sad it’s a fun lil car#but it hasn’t been getting the love it deserves and it’s time for something more suited to our needs as a family#kinda exciting really I hope we get it#we all fucking hate spending money so both my parents have been waffling on it for a couple of days#but like I told them mama you got a doctor’s appointment next week for your g tube#and then a hospital follow up with our pcp the week after that#and you’re gonna have to see a gi and a nutritionist pretty regularly#and there’s gonna be more surgeon follow ups I’m sure#and eventually we’re gonna need to take you to outpatient pt cuz we can’t have a home health pt forever#cuz insurance only pays for it for like six weeks#so either we’re gonna have to rent a car every time you go to the doctor#or we gotta buy one#and like this isnt going away you’ll have to go to the doctor often#cuz you’re missing like half of your small intestine#so getting a rental all the time is gonna suck#it would be better to have a car you can get in and out of easily just on hand#not to mention eventually you’re gonna wanna get out of this house just for the hell of it#and it’s not like we can wake up one morning and decide hey let’s go on a day trip#and then waste two hours driving back and forth from the nearest enterprise#which is on an extremely busy two lane highway and is FUCKING terrifying to get to lmfao#so with any luck my dad will keep that in mind and not back out at the dealership lol
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its important to go see a low stakes concert sometimes
#as in seeing someone in concert youre not an absolute nutbag about (as i have done this year and last year)#but last night me n my dad went and saw renaissance on their farewell tour#running on like 4 hours of sleep and seething to be at work right now#or rather i would be seething if i weren't so tired#new anger management hack: just get less sleep so your senses are dulled! anyway#funniest part of the night was the multiples times when my dad who is old was like 'everyone here is so old :/'#he was literally like 'if i ever get like these people just shoot me' LMAO#the concert was good i wouldn't call it like great or fantastic but such is the beauty of a low stakes concert#youre not living and dying on every song youre not singing along to everything youre just. enjoyin the show normally which is crazy#again as someone who has seen two bands (both bands two separate times and is seeing one of those bands a THIRD TIME soon) im crazy over#that experience is fun its bonkers and you definitely gotta do it for the bands youre crazy over. you gotta#but it was nice to just. have a regular time at a show#as far as the show itself there were a few little moments where things didnt go as smooth but that may have been bc it was the first show#and save for a few moments in some songs annie haslam knocked it out of the park she can still sing as insanely good as she used to#again some parts of songs were in a lower key? but most seemed to be the same and she was still hitting those bonkers high notes#so good for her. the band was pretty good but i felt they really only like all worked together well on a few songs#if that makes sense. but overall pretty good#and my anxieties about getting there and back were unfounded bc somehow it all worked. yay#our car service trip home was in a tesla i felt like i was gonna die the entire ride home lol#i am NEVER getting in one of those stupid cars again. big ass ipad as your dashboard this is insane???? im so scared???#anywho. old musicians are forever as ive been saying lately. and they really are#oh also we were at the town hall which is a nice small theater i was worried abt bein too far away but it's laid out really well#in that you're sure to get a pretty good view of the stage#it seems like half the size roughly of the beacon for whatever thats worth#OH i did see one dude somewhere in the audience with a sparks shirt so. hashtag represent#yet another concert report. yayyyyy#(im so tired)
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#currently on the worst road trip of my whole entire life! well. i don't want to jinx it lmao but#today i popped TWO TIRES at once in the middle of the Katy Freeway in Houston TX (the widest highway in the US; 26 lanes btw)#managed to make it over to the shoulder without DYING but then had to sit there for like an hour? and panic called a tow truck because duh#I know how to change a tire but I was – again – sitting on the shoulder of the widest freeway on the continent so#anyway I called a tow; a guy showed up. I assumed it was the tow! turned out it was not. but he helped me put on the spare and then was lik#“follow me to my shop I can do the tires for you” and I was like okay! 👍 but then the ACTUAL tow called me and I realized this was#just a random guy (very nice up to that point but then I got scared about following him to a secondary location?) and so I didn't lmao#I just kept driving and didn't follow him but the guy on the phone was then mad at me because I wasn't where I said I would be because#AGAIN – I thought the original guy WAS the tow company that I called? but anyway guy 2 on the phone was like “YOU OWE ME $200!!!!”#and I said for what? also how would I pay you? and he tried to get me to cash app him lmao?? I didn't. I hung up on him#he called me like 6 more times yelling at me until I finally just blocked his number 💀#however NOW at this point I'm driving on one spare tire and one rapidly-flattening second tire and I still have 3 hours left to get where#I was going for the night and to top it all off I'm in the middle of a city I've only been to one time before? so I manage to get to a hote#like a nice-ish one where I'm like “okay if I get stuck here this won't be the end of the world”#because keep in mind today is a national holiday so basically everything is closed!!!! btw!!!!!#but eventually I'm sitting there and it's literally 100F outside and I remember oh right lol I have car insurance which pays for a tow#(a normal one; not a random one I panic-found on google who calls me screaming at me to cash app him $200)#so anyway I call my insurance and the guy on the phone is very nice and is like “it's okay; we'll have someone to you in 45 min”#and I'm like okay. OKAY. 🙌💪 I am a strong independent woman who is figuring this out and no longer on the side of the highway#but instead in a nice calm neighborhood and all I have to do is wait 45 min and everything will be okay#one hour goes by. I call back. get redirected to the tow company that was dispatched. guy says oh! is my guy not there yet?#I say no. he says okay – I'll have him call you. hangs up.#okay. 20 more min go by. guy finally calls me. says “I'm 20-25 min away” at this point I've been waiting about an hour and a half#I say. okay? okay. 30 more minutes go by. I try to call the guy back. straight to voicemail. three more calls. three more no answers.#I call my insurance back. sit on hold for 15 min. eventually get put through to a different person who's like “okay let me check on him”#get put on hold. eventually she comes back and says “okay he says 15 minutes” I've been waiting over 2 hours at this point. I have to PEE#I just... burst into tears. on the phone with this poor random woman from Geico Insurance. I'm bawling my eyes out.#she was trying to get claim info from me but I'm crying so hard she's like “oh baby no. okay. okay. we can get that from you tomorrow.”#when you cry so hard that even the insurance company is like “you know what we're just going to let this one slide”#anyway guy eventually shows up. he's very nice even though I hate him a little for being so late. he drives me to an OPEN TIRE SHOP
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sometimes you just want to have a nice evening, to watch something and eat something
and obviously cry
#text#from so many options i pressed play on this?#half hour ago i was smiling and imagining two middle aged men have some nasty sex on a spaceship far far away#and now im in tears and questioning existence#how why what the
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