#trying to identify the common element in the foods i have a bad reaction to is HARD when nothing is SPECIFIC

[brittapcrrys]

i think companies should have to actually name the specific herbs and spices that go into their products instead of just saying "spices" in the ingredients list, actually

[cogentranting]

The flashbacks in Prodigal Son 2x03 were, in my opinion, a major puzzle piece of Malcolm’s past that we didn’t even know we were missing. I think they were hugely significant. Or they should be. 

Malcolm being attacked in that way is potentially one of the most overtly traumatic experiences we’ve seen in Malcolm’s childhood. It really stands out among the things we’ve seen and heard about from his childhood. Up until this point Malcolm’s trauma has all been a bit more abstract. The grooming from his father. The fallout from his father’s crimes being revealed, and the way that changed how Malcolm was viewed. His own fears pertaining to his how he might be like Martin, and fear of Martin directly. Finding the body. Even being chloroformed by Martin fits more in this general category.  But this incident is distinctly different. First of all, this is the most significant trauma not directly from Martin; Martin is indirectly the cause, but there is a much more present, much more direct perpetrator, and that’s unique. Secondly, this is the first trauma that directly, and maliciously targets Malcolm. Most of what Malcolm has dealt with is the result of just being within the fallout zone from Martin’s actions. Even the ones that are more focused on him-- Martin’s grooming and the chloroform-- have a different character because there’s no explicit malice (they certainly did harm Malcolm, but that was not Martin’s mindset in doing them). Third, there’s a greater degree of specific fear in the particular moment. Most of the flashbacks we’ve seen with the child actor don’t necessarily show Malcolm being afraid (even though fear is a big thing for Malcolm). With a lot of those aspects, it seems like it was more a creeping fear after the fact, as he realized more and more about who his father was and what had been going on with him and around him. So it wasn’t concentrated in one moment but was spread out over everything, sort of a spreading infection that worked its way into every aspect of his life over time. And that fear is somewhat abstract or even existential a lot of the time. (this point might have the exception of the moment when he find the girl in the box). Which is quite different from the experience in the 2x03 flashback, where there is a present intense fear for his life. Fourth, this is the only one which caused Malcolm physical harm (the chloroform had the potential to, but the main way it seems to have affected Malcolm was through the role it played in gaslighting him, and through the realization during season 1 of how Martin treated him and what that meant for the relationship). This one however, physically trapped Malcolm and led to him being denied food and water for three days.  (Note: I’ve excluded the events with Watkins at the cabin from this discussion, primarily because Malcolm had so thoroughly repressed those memories) None of this is to say that the closet incident was worse than what Martin did, or that it affected Malcolm more, just that this incident has a very different character, so it can’t be written off as just another episode in a long run. 

But I do think there’s a strong argument to be made that this event did have a major effect on Malcolm. It is so different and so extreme that I don’t see how it could not. According to this episode, we do know that this is the origin of his hand tremor (I know this conflicts with an earlier flashback, but I’m going to accept the retcon). However, the way the episode was framed it almost felt like  they were treating this as just some random bit of backstory. So I really hope that they do revisit this idea and incorporate it more into our understanding of Malcolm and why he is who he is. 

There’s already one more conclusion that I think can be reasonably drawn. While this incident stands out really starkly against Malcolm’s childhood trauma, it doesn’t stand out against his adult trauma. In the present, things of this nature-- Malcolm being targeted, Malcolm being hurt, Malcolm’s life being in danger-- are very common. Very common. Practically a weekly occurrence. 

And it’s very clear that Malcolm’s response to these weekly brushes with death is not appropriately scaled. The end of 2x03 even demonstrated this. Malcolm risks his life. Malcolm gets hurt. And Malcolm shrugs it off and tries to disregard it. 

Maybe the root of that lies in this high school experience. The timeframe isn’t clear but it appears as if Malcolm is back at the school (WITH the student who did this) within the week. That could be Jessica pushing him to maintain appearances, that could be the school’s doing, or that could be a choice made by Malcolm himself, but regardless, that is hardly any time given for him to recover either physically or emotionally. Which becomes characteristic of Malcolm. Furthermore, when Malcolm retaliates (and of course I am not condoning his little foray into attempted murder) he is the one who is punished. Malcolm is expelled, but we are not told that the same happened to the student who locked him in the closet in the first place. It could be that Malcolm refused to identify who trapped him (because he wanted to take action himself) and that’s the reason we don’t hear about him facing consequences. It could be that for whatever reason, there were no significant consequences for that boy. Or it could be that he did get expelled (or face other consequences) and the narrative, framed as a component of Malcolm’s memory, did not include that detail. 

With any of these explanations, a pattern is established that frames Malcolm’s perception. Malcolm is hurt. Malcolm’s actions to protect or avenge himself are bad and punishable. Malcolm’s attacker either faces no consequences, or those consequences are deemed unimportant. 

Now, again, of course it would not be right for Malcolm to murder the student who trapped him. But I think the extremity of that reaction informs why this pattern seems to have held. Malcolm is so afraid of his capability to be like Martin-- to kill-- that he struggles to draw a distinction between justified self defense/reaction and vengeful retaliation. He fears the latter so he hesitates to pursue the former. 

So it seems that this particular incident in high school is what began to unduly acclimatize Malcolm to violence against himself and fear of death. And it at least planted the idea in his mind (or watered it) that he should be extremely distrustful of any of his own attempts to protect himself, and that it doesn’t matter whether his attacker faces repercussions or not. 

Whether he expressed it and understood it explicitly or not, Malcolm’s takeaway from the experience seems to have been that there is some element of his father in him and that others will innately recognize it and try to punish it (attributing this to both the headmaster and the other student) and that as much as he might hate them for it, he feels limited in how much he can actually blame them for it. Because on some level he sees them as justified in whatever they do to him. In fact, the only one he feels he can consistently blame for actions against himself, is Martin, because while others are punishing him for the “evil” he inherited from Martin, Martin is the one to blame ultimately for it being there. 

[warsofasoiaf]

I'd love to hear your thoughts about Cyberpunk 2077 when you are ready/have finished the game. Maybe besides the game itself you have an opinion about the crunch, bugs and general feeling of disappointment in a good portion of the fans

Sure thing. It’s going to be a long write-up and there are going to be spoilers, so you better believe that this is going to have a cut. Reader beware. For context, I have beat the game, and I played it on PC and only on PC.

I’ve been a fan of the cyberpunk genre for a long time. Transhuman and techno-utopian sci-fi always struck me the wrong way; that it was too optimistic and ignored a less savory element of human nature that simply would not go away with the advent of new technologies. While I only briefly dipped my toes in the water of the Cyberpunk tabletop game (I was always a bigger fan of Shadowrun), I did enjoy the genre and was eager to see a AAA cyberpunk game. I also really liked CD Projekt Red with what they did with RPG’s like the Witcher 3. Particularly when it came to the smaller sidequests, they really found a way to bring a lot of noir elements and hard-hitting character moments to the game, and I believed that it could translate very well into a cyberpunk game. After all, noir was a similar response to detective fiction to what the cyberpunk genre was to earlier elements of sci-fi. So I was quite optimistic when it came out. What we got was...well, it didn’t quite meet up with expectations.

There are some good things about the game. Assuming you have a beefy rig, PC cyberpunk looks pretty good. Not only does it look good, but it looks like the dismal 1980′s inspired future that had defined the genre, with its neon lights, omnipresent advertising to the point of satire (amphetamines are available from vending machines in a variety of flavors and commercials are completely ridiculous). The fixers are great examples of different cyberpunk archetypes like Regina Jones being a media or the Padre being an underclass civic leader looking to protect his community with a bit of a violent streak. Plenty of the characters had great personality, the nomads and Panam were enjoyable, Judy had a great questline that detailed optimism and bitter disappointment (and the character looks cool and is a bit of a cinnamon roll), River’s quest was a perfectly serviceable cop questline with enough horror elements, they were all fine. Keanu wasn’t a great voice actor, but he did serviceably and was apparently just wonderful with the staff, so I’m willing to cut him a pass. The level design can encourage a variety of different play styles, with attribute points opening up certain pathways. Given that it’s an open-world sandbox game, the goal should be to immerse yourself in the world, and touch on elements of cyberpunk as you go through the various quests, and you do see some of that. You see the gross exploitations of dolls in the sex trade when you go to Clouds, the bizarre elements of self-expression that new technologies can offer such as the twins in Kabuki, Pacifica is an abandoned recreation ground for the rich with the nice image of rotting Ferris wheels and abandoned malls, and you can see the divide between the have’s and have-not’s on full display both in the opening (compare and contrast the Street Kid with the Corpo beginnings) or take a look at the Peralez’s penthouse apartment versus Judy’s cramped digs. Honestly, one of my favorite things in the game were just the consumables to highlight the different food and drink available to the people of Night City. The heavy population means that foods like fried ants or locust pepperoni are common, amphetamines are available in a variety of flavors, and there are no less than 20 burrito vending machines on every street (the future is not all bad it seems). I like little worldbuilding moments like this in video games because it does give a sense of completion and immersion within the world. I honestly felt bad for Johnny Silverhand, because by the end of the game I had to be a bloated man-ball of Holobites Peach Pie and Cirrus Cola. 

The game even took a few things that had aged poorly in the cyberpunk genre and improved them. The Mox is a gang specifically meant to stop the Disposable Sex Worker trope, it’s small and part of the reason it survives is that it’s small, but it offers a chance of improvement over the exploitation that the Tyger Claws offer. The cyberpyscho quest is probably the best one of this. Earlier Cyberpunk had cyberpsychosis as a serious concern directly correlated with how many implants you got. The Solo archetype even spoke about how you risk losing your humanity with your implants as you became stronger, better, faster. Even later iterations had depersonalization/derealization disorders as people who could see in the dark lost connection to those who couldn’t. A quick thought in our present though, changes this. My eyesight and hearing is just fine, but I don’t lose connection or common empathy with individuals who are blind or deaf. I have two arms and two legs and I have not lost empathy for amputees. Why then, would I lose empathy and connection with someone with average human eyesight after I get my eyes replaced and now I have the ability to see in the dark or have telescopic sight? The cyberpsycho quest actually took this concept to task; cyberpsychos around the city are seen as horrifying threats that need the high-threat response of MaxTac to deal with, but Regina is looking to see if she can cure cyberpsychosis. Mechanically, the cyberpsychos are boss-fights with elements of puzzle gameplay (how to handle the different skillsets that they have) and a bonus reward for non-lethal damage which rewards certain playstyle archetypes or prepwork for those who ensure that they have a non-lethal option. The information you find around each cyberpyscho showcase different problems in the target’s life, no real common thread or inciting incident that you can trace the onset of cyberpsychosis toward and identify a culprit. After you complete the quest, you learn the twist: there is no such thing as cyberpsychosis. Each of the targets were actually just experiencing different stressors within their lives, such as PTSD, losing their job, drug abuse, etc. and the breakdown is made much worse because these individuals have the ability to toss dumpsters like they were baseballs or pick the wings off a fly with a cybernetically enhanced brain with a .50 cal. Some of these individuals had terrible implant surgery done by bargain-basement ripperdocs and temporarily lost the ability to discern reality from fantasy, something that could easily be seen as a science fiction adaptation of temporary insanity brought on by a poor reaction to medicine. It’s backed up by the game too. V can fill every slot in their cyberware deck but never once experiences cyberpsychosis. Oda has ultra-legs and flaming-hot mantis blades and is in perfect control at every point in the game, even when he’s trying to jab those mantis blade through your sternum. Cyberpyschosis isn’t real, the irresponsible media just ran with it because fear sells. For all the flaws of the game, I respect the game for taking cyberpsychosis in that direction.

But for all those good things, the game couldn’t help but feel shallower than the Witcher 3. The side-gigs were formulaic to the point where they even led with a category. There were few twists and very little that was surprising. Exposition for these quests was limited to a short text dump and a minute voice-over. Night City was big but it was relatively sparse. NCPD never seemed to intervene in any crimes (giving the character the chance to do so) but every so often they were around a taped-off crime scene, giving a sense of inconsistency that hampered the world. While it was a bustling city, it felt empty, most of the people I saw on the street were meaningless, just NPC’s walking around to give a sense of activity. There was little in the way of things to see and experience that was unique or different about these NPC’s. They weren’t crowds I could hide in like Hitman, they didn’t have ambient dialogue that showcased something like the Witcher 3. Much like other open-world games, this sense of shallowness pervaded much of the empty space of the world; it was incredibly *big* but there was little in it. Much of the time I was driving or running through empty space that was completely worthless to me. Normal for city living, but all of that is wasted time going from point A to point B, and unlike the Witcher 3, there were no small in-game beats to help flesh it out or build it. I never had Millie from “Where the Wolf and Cat Play” give me a little picture, I never had people from a liberated village say “hey, look, it’s that guy Geralt, thanks for killing those harpies.” These were things that made the Witcher 3′s world really come alive. I didn’t have that, and I was left

Of course, we also have to handle the elephant in the room, and that was CDPR’s conduct both during production and after release. Crunch has become an increasingly common part of video game development and it’s not healthy to developers. CDPR had been called out on it once before, but it seemed there was little change in how that happens. I’m not quite sure if there’s anything we can do, and I’m sympathetic to the need to hit target deadlines to actually deliver a finished product, but there’s got to be a better way, whether that’s a change to the incentive structure, or something, because it’s hurting folks. I like games like Witcher 3 and Red Dead Redemption 2, but I understand that there was a real human cost to these masterpieces, and I wonder if there’s something we can do about that. 

Similarly, what happened after launch was beyond terrible. The last-gen console version were simply not ready for release and shouldn’t have been released to the public. CDPR openly covered up this, by only previewing the PC version, they hid the fact that the game wasn’t ready, and they avoided delaying the last-gen console version because they were looking to capitalize on holiday sales. I’m sympathetic for the need to generate sales, but the flip of this is that you have to deliver the product you advertise, and for last-gen consoles, they didn’t do so. Bugs are one thing, these games are massive undertakings of interacting systems and bugs are inevitable; some of my favorite games were buggy at release, notably Fallout: New Vegas, Witcher 3, and so on. But this went past bugs and into malpractice and deception, and that’s something that’s less forgivable. I personally had few bugs that were out-and-out game breaking but things not loading, quests bugging out, floating bags and other physics wonkiness, all of that hurt the immersion. I’d be more willing to forgive the game without the deception; I can laugh at bugs but not at ignoring quality control to get holiday sales instead of delivering a quality product. Consumers are angry at CDPR and have every reason to be, and I’m one of them. I can express my disappointment and I will do so, we need developers to stop these practices and the only way we can do that is through our wallets and words. I’m not going to tell anyone not to buy CDPR games, that’s entirely your decision because I’m a radical individualist. But I am going to say that they’ve burned a lot of their good karma with me; credibility is a hard beast to gain back. Much like other big name developers, CDPR has hurt their standing in my eyes. Whether that means I need to resort to going to indie games for a little bit or something else, I don’t know, but it’s rough. I liked CDPR and wanted to believe it’d be different, but it seems to not be the case.

Overall, I think it’s another AAA open-world game only made better by my love of the genre, and that stings. I enjoyed some aspects of it, and I hope that through Free DLC, patching, and other good deeds, the game can redeem itself and stimulate new love of the genre. But CDPR needs to do a lot more than that to win back my affection. If anyone has anything specifically that they want to know about the game, such as talk about the main story, individual characters, or so on, just ask.

Thanks for the question, Khef.

SomethingLikeALawyer, Hand of the King

[stringergames]

Downtime Roleplay 1 - A Gentle Ribbing

Post Episode 2 - No Smoke Without Fire

Set as group take a short rest to recover somewhat from their first experiences in the strange house they’ve found themselves in. Magpie and Jem tentatively discuss the situation, and how they first met. Fox butts in.

Spoiler warnings: references events from the first two episodes of Edge of Night

Content warnings: depiction of injury (broken ribs, minor burns, exhaustion); self-harm (scratching); references to violence; references to inter-party conflict; references to murder; references to fantasy racism; discussion of horror/paranormal elements; swearing

Magpie sits in a corner, leaving the chairs for the others. His eyes are unfocused, and he occasionally winces at the pain from his ribs if he moves wrong. His ungloved hands are half-clasped in front of him, one anxiously scratching at the back of the other, reddening and irritating the skin.

Jem slumps onto the ground next to Magpie, not close enough to be considered friendly, but not on the other side of the room, as instinct says she should. This man intrigues her. Professional curiosity, that's all. But curiosity nonetheless. What kind of person offers help to someone who stabbed them?

"That looks uncomfortable." She gestures towards his hand.

Magpie focuses in on the present, and looks first at Jem, and then down at his hands. He stops picking at his skin, and hides the redness with his other hand.

"Unconscious habit. It's nothing, really." His voice is hoarse, and tends to trail off at the ends of sentences, as though he struggles to get all the words out before his throat gives up.

"I, uh, I guess the ribs don't help either, huh?" Jem has the decency to look sheepish, although her words are far from an actual apology.

Magpie laughs, a slight wheeze to it, and then winces. 

"No, they certainly don't, but they'll heal. One way or another. Doubt I look as rough as you do though. How are you holding up?"

Jem frowns. Laughter wasn't exactly the response that she was expecting. Nor was sympathy. 

"I'm fine. I don't need your pity." She pauses for a second, considers it, and then adds, "I feel like I haven't slept in four days, and my dress is ruined, so I'm not on my best form, I suppose."

Magpie quirks a smile, and leans back against the wall with a sigh. 

"It's a shame, it was a nice dress." He pauses a moment, and then changes tack. "I've heard of dangerous mists, but more in the sense of 'you might not see this cliff edge,' than the mists themselves doing something like this. I wish I knew what was going on."

Jem nods. "It's definitely outside my sphere of reference, but then again so are haunted houses, reanimated boars, and waking up in closets I definitely didn't go to sleep in."

Magpie hums a noise of agreement, and looks over at her. "It's a bizarre place. I woke up in a master bedroom of some kind. Imposing paintings on the wall and everything."

Jem stares at him for a moment. She isn't a sharer. But something about this stranger is oddly compelling. And, she reasons, she's delirious at best. 

"I woke up twice. The second time was in the cupboard, but the first time was... somewhere else entirely."

"Somewhere else? Do you know where it was?" Magpie's hand begins subtly scratching at the back of his other one again. He doesn't seem to notice, and is instead looking curiously her way.

"I'm not sure it was a ‘somewhere’ at all actually." Jem notices the scratching, but says nothing, lost in her own anxiety as she considers the deal she made in her panic. "It was just darkness, oppressively warm darkness, like being in a starless desert. And there were sparks coming from nowhere every so often. One got me." She turns her head so that Magpie can see the slight burn on her cheek.

He looks, and quirks an eyebrow. "Very strange. This whole situation just keeps spiralling further into the unknown, doesn't it? What made you wake up here instead of staying there?"

Delirious or not, Jem isn't about to admit to making dodgy deals with voices she couldn't identify. 

"Not sure. I don't even know if I could have stayed there. This place definitely isn't any better though. What do you think of the ankle-biters?"

"The children? I don't know. They seem strange. They don't want to come back into the house, sure, but they don't seem as scared as you would expect. Regardless of the fog, and the boars coming back to life, this whole place feels off somehow. The room I woke up in was full of cobwebs and disused. None of us know how we got here. None of it seems... trustworthy somehow, and while I do think we should help them, I don't know what to think of them."

"I'll tell you this much, their concept of time ain't right. There's no way that a family was actively living in this place yesterday. Which makes me doubly suspicious of the fresh food and the fires, they don't match up."

Magpie nods his agreement. "I don't see what else we can do though. We can't leave, and we've got to try something. I don't want to be stuck here forever, so the best we can do is try and effect a change. A monster in the basement looks like a solid start to trying to get rid of harmful fog and reanimating taxidermy."

"I've always found that hitting something hard effects a change of some sort. Positive or negative, it won't be the same."

Magpie's eyes flick down to his chest briefly, and he hums noncommittally. "I think that's probably true."

Ah fuck. Jem decides to give up on making conversation and goes back to concentrating on not falling asleep against the wall.

Magpie chuckles, and nudges her with his elbow. "Look, if you stab someone, you've got to accept it may come up in conversation sometimes, but I'm not angry. We have much bigger problems on our hands I think, and besides, I think you might have done me a favour."

Jem jumps at the contact. "Well, that's certainly a unique reaction. How exactly, if ya don't mind me askin'?"

"I'm right in thinking it wasn't me you were after?"

"If it were, you'd be dead." Jem smiles.

"It could just be where we are, I suppose, but something doesn't feel right." He pulls his sleeve back slightly, exposing more of the white tattoos that can be seen on his face and neck, brushing his fingertips over them and then digging his nails in. "Did you manage it? Or were you caught before you could?"

Jem remembers the sickening crunch of Farthen's boot on Lord Creighton's skull. 

"I think it's safe to say that he won't be giving orders or making racist comments any more. I'm good at my job, and I don't often mix business and pleasure, but I can't help but feel like that racist prick is no great loss to anyone."

A bitter grin spreads across Magpie's face, and his nails dig deeper into his arm. 

"Good." 

His expression brightens a little, some of the darkness that crept into his eyes fleeing again, but a malicious tint still plays at the edges of his expression. "See? You did me a favour."

Jem watches the danger in his grin, and an almost matching smile spreads across her own face. "Then you're welcome, I guess. And for what it's worth, I think you're the least irritating of the lot, so far."

"You're not so bad yourself, for a noble." He laughs again, and then winces, and curls in on himself a bit.

"Ah, yes. About that..." Jem trails off with a shrug. "It's a good cover, but hardly worth it here. I don't think I caught your name at the gala, and I feel fairly certain that the one you got for me was... inaccurate. If we're going to work together for any length of time, we ought to clear that up. I'm Jemima. Jemima Linden."

Fox glances over his shoulder. 

"Absolutely shameful," he tuts. "Impersonating a noble. For shame. I, as a Lord, am outraged."

Jemima actually laughs at this. "The hat is fooling nobody, ginger."

Magpie stops halfway through introducing himself as Fox interjects, and catches himself, starting again. 

"Magpie. Just Magpie." He looks over his shoulder at Fox, and then whispers to Jem, "I didn't know he was a lord. He definitely doesn't act like one."

Jem doesn't bother to whisper back. "If he's a lord, I'll eat his stupid hat."

"You keep away from my hat. I need some of my lordly dignity preserved." He looks from Jemima to Magpie, and gives a mock bow, almost losing the hat in the process. "Lord Fox Ripley, at your service."

"Oh goodness, well in that case," Jem starts to laugh again. "I'd curtsey, but standing is difficult and also I don't believe you."

Fox smiles, and shrugs. "Believe what you like, Ms. Linden. I've got nothing to prove. And as you say, what's a title mean here anyway? I assure you though, red heads can be lords."

"Do forgive me, my Lord," Jem smirks. "I'm sure you're right. What would a commoner like myself know about such things anyway?"

"I'm sure you'll catch up, Princess," Fox says, matching the smirk.

Jem's eyes flash dangerously at the nickname, but she can't help the small amount of actual mirth that curls around the corners of her mouth as she looks pointedly at his ears. 

"I look forward to it, my Lord."

*

Written by Nick Drew, Francesca Forrest & Rowan E. Madden.

Edited by Rowan E. Madden

Edge of Night is a dnd 5e actual play podcast, brought to you by Stringer Games. It is available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts & Acast.

[beautifulterriblequeen]

It’s discussed a lot about how Callum will react to Runaan when he gets out of the coin, but how do you think some of the other human characters would react to him? Like Soren, Amaya and Gren (it’s unclear if Gren ever actually *saw* Runaan, but for argument’s sake, let’s say he did.)

Ooh what a fun question, anon!

Let’s see, Soren. Well, by the time Runaan is freed, Soren will probably have had months or years as Rayla’s ally, even if he spends all his time with Ezran as his Crownguard. I also hope that Soren gets some real-world experience and education at the Storm Spire and in Lux Aurea before he returns to Katolis, if Ezran’s going to return to being king (which, idk, technically I think Soren’s king now, actually, as VIren’s heir, but that’s a whole ‘nother post). 

Soren is a genuinely warm guy. If he gets some time to learn about what Avizandum and Zubeia’s side of the war has been like, as well as Khessa and Janai’s, he’ll have a pretty balanced viewpoint on the conflict as a whole, which will make him a really solid adviser for Ezran, considering the training and actual battle experience he already has.

He may even contribute to the chain of events that frees Runaan, since he’s the one who put Runaan in the dungeon in the first place. His piece of the puzzle is that Runaan isn’t dead, and was imprisoned instead of being killed, and he knows exactly where and how, and also what Runaan looks like. He got a fistful of that long white hair, which is Runaan’s most distinctive physical trait (out of several, okay), so if anyone ever brings up that hair–Soren included–it’ll be obvious who’s being referred to, and that could direct various characters in their hunt/quest to free/locate him.

But what would he do upon seeing Runaan again? They’ll definitely remember each other. I think the key element will be this: time has passed eventfully for Soren, but it won’t have passed in the same way for Runaan. He’ll be stuck, trapped out of the world, alone with the same thoughts over and over again and no new input to help him grow and change. So Soren will probably have come a long way in his personal development, while Runaan won’t have done much more than spin in circles and rethink his choices.

I think the first thing Runaan would do is go on the defensive–or the offensive–with any weapon he can possibly get his hands on, and the first thing Soren would do is to hold up his hands and say, “Whoa there, Rayla’s Pointy Dad Number Two, I’m not gonna pull your hair this time. Promise. 

“And uhh, look. I wanna apologize on behalf of my dad. Viren. The old High Mage who kept you prisoner? I made some bad choices when I listened to him. And what he did to you was wrong. And I was wrong to help him. I thought I was helping my country when I did what he and my sister told me to do. But I ended up hurting people who didn’t deserve it. 

“And Rayla–she’s great, by the way, taught me how to sweep the leg and everything–she’s helped me understand a lot about myself.. Because she and I, we have a lot in common. Trying to do the best we can for our dads being one of those things, and all. 

“So, what I’m trying to say while you’re still deciding if you’re gonna stab me is this: I’m sorry. I’ve been to the Storm Spire, I’ve lived in Lux Aurea, and I, I get it now. The whole war thing. And, who we are inside it. People like you and me. Warriors, fighting to protect people we love. I’ve learned to see more than I ever thought I could. More than my dad wanted me to. 

“So… really please don’t stab me, because I’m just trying to do what my king says: we don’t have to fight back. We don’t have to continue the cycle. You killed my last king, and I couldn’t stop you. And, yeah, that still hurts, not gonna lie. But Ezran’s my king now. And I’d follow him to the ends of the earth. If… the earth… has ends. Geometry wasn’t my best class.  Anyway. So how about we talk, you and me, okay, just a couple of badasses, and we’ll try not to fall back on old habits, yeah? Cool. And… how many pushups do you think you can do?”

And Runaan hasn’t said a single word the whole time. He’s just let Soren go on and on and on. But Soren’s been paying attention to Rayla, trying to understand his new ally whenever he can. So he’s been very slowly stepping closer to Runaan, keeping his hands in sight and open, using Rayla’s mannerisms. And that whole message hits Runaan just as hard as hearing Rayla’s name on Soren’s lips. Soren does know Rayla. Knows her well. Things have changed. And he’s going to need to go slow so he doesn’t make a mistake. He’ll never let Soren into his blind spot, but he’ll play along after that show of information. He’ll look Soren up and down and say, “More than you can,” and Soren will grin like a little kid, because he’s just made peace instead of war, and he’s so proud of himself!

Aww, Soren is like hay. He’s great.

Amaya: afawk she hasn’t met Runaan directly, so unless they have some clashy backstory, Amaya’s attitude toward him will be a combination of “This dude killed my brother-in-law/king” and “this dude is my nephew’s girlfriend’s dad”.

By the time Amaya meets Runaan, she’ll know about Rayllum and how strong and steady it’s become. She’ll have Janai by her side. She’ll know about the power of love, and that overt aggression toward Runaan for taking Harrow won’t go over well with Rayla, and maybe not with Callum either. Plus, they’re all trying to move forward in peace, and her relationship with Janai is a big symbol of that. So on one hand, she’s a walking symbol of peace through love. And on the other, she can offer Runaan an olive branch to achieve peace through forgiveness.

A big influence is going to be how well Amaya and Rayla get along. I’d love to see Amaya teaching Rayla ASL because Rayla wants to be able to send silent messages. It’s a very Moonshadow form of communication, and Runaan talks a lot with his hands already, so Rayla’s primed for a new language there, I think. And the more time they spend bonding, the more Amaya’s tolerance will rise. 

She may have the hardest time forgiving Runaan, out of everyone. Callum has a huge heart. Ezran is a soft boy through and through. Soren would identify with Rayla pretty strongly, with their dark dads. Gren’s too nice not to feel for Runaan. But Amaya’s whole job has been defending Katolis from elves. And she failed, and her brother-in-law died at Runaan’s hands. So part of her hangup with him will be her own guilt. I’m not sure they’ll ever be friendly. 

Callum has more reason to hate Runaan than Amaya, but he’s young and in love with Runaan’s daughter, so he’s got motive and ability to be emotionally flexible. Amaya, for all her love of Janai, might not be quite as flexible toward a Moonshadow assassin whose actions put her nephew on the throne and destabilized Katolis, leaving it vulnerable to a coup and warmongering at Viren’s hands.

So, I think their meeting might go a bit like this: Amaya sees Runaan for the first time after he’s freed. It’s probably not immediately after. He’ll have a chance to find some shirts and eat something, probably heal up as much as he’s going to. And then they’ll come face to face. They’ll warily study each other for a long moment. And then Amaya will shrug and smirk, and Runaan will narrow his eyes, and she’ll punch him as hard as she can, and he’ll let her. Everyone will get caught off guard. Janai and Ethari, if they’re there, will step forward immediately to see to their partners and eye each other warily. But it’ll be Amaya and Runaan who tell them to calm down. Everything just got worked out, as much as it’s ever going to be.

Unless someone attacks Rayllum. Then I’ll get my cherished hc of Runaan and Amaya fighting back to back. It won’t matter what they’re fighting against. They’ll both be all in. Trusting Rayllum’s other stabby parent would definitely bond them more than anything else ever could.

And now for my sweet boy Gren: Gren is really empathetic, and he knows what Runaan’s last days before the coin were like. Gren had it easy--food, water, light, getting to stand up, not having to endure the odd magical experiment. Runaan wasn’t so lucky. We all saw the level of concern Gren had for his fellow prisoner down the hallway when Runaan started screaming. We saw his horror as he realized what Viren had done and how Runaan was still alive inside that creepy tiny prison coin. 

Gren probably didn’t get a very good look at Runaan in the coin, but he’s very good with voices, and he’d recognize Runaan’s in a heartbeat. He could hear everything he and Viren said down the hall. He knew to ask about Xadian fruit, which means he overheard the “Moonshadow elf thing” comment. He knew darn well that Runaan was a Moonshadow--could easily guess that he was one of the assassins--and he was still horrified at his fate. Gren doesn’t carry a weapon--he prefers to talk. And talk and talk and talk. I bet there are plenty of things Gren wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy, and getting coined is one of them now.

So this poor soft dungeon boy, who called down the hall trying to get Runaan to chat and never got an answer, only heard him talking to Viren, what would his reaction be upon seeing Runaan again? Upon hearing him?

Gren would wait for all the “more important” people to speak to Runaan first. Janai, Amaya, Rayla and Callum. And then he’d step forward when Runaan was available and try to have a quick word. He’d stand mirroring Runaan, trying to use Moonshadow body language as best he could. Maybe he picked some of it up from Rayla. And he’d want to speak, but have no real idea what to say. 

“Hey. I’m glad you’re okay. What Viren did to you was... wrong. Really wrong. No one should have to go through that, no matter what. I... just wanted you to know that I’m sorry. I... would’ve helped you out... but...” And here Gren gets caught up in his own memories. He’d tried to stay positive in the dungeon, and he could help himself all day long, but he couldn’t help the guy screaming down the hall. Gren’s no pushover, but that whole experience was really hard for him. The walls of that dungeon start to close in around him again.

“You did,” Runaan says. Reluctantly, but not unkindly. He was too busy trying to hunger strike to appreciate Gren’s overtures of friendliness, but once in the coin, Runaan had ages to contemplate every tiny detail of his imprisonment and what led to it. And Gren would be a bafflingly bright spot. No discernible motive. Just a soft, genuine human who tried to cheer Runaan up despite knowing who he was and what he had done.

And that’s all the encouragement Gren needs. He got to be helpful and communicate and do something good, and that’s all he’s ever wanted to do. He’ll glue himself to Runaan’s side for as long as the elf will put up with him, trying to learn as much as he can about Moonshadows. And Runaan will let him, for the most part, because the true measure of a person is how they treat someone who can do nothing for them. And when Runaan could offer Gren absolutely nothing in the dungeon, Gren offered him kindness and consideration. That’s worth a little bit of Moonshadow trust, and Gren will eagerly use what he leans from Runaan to aid in his ability to make peaceful overtures between Xadia and Katolis.

I think that in general, human reactions to Runaan will be muted by the existence of Rayllum. If Rayla weren’t his daughter, and if Callum weren’t her boyfriend, then I do think some characters would react more angrily to him. But Rayllum is bringing peace and holding it together as the first link, and no one wants to challenge that and cause war again over an enemy combatant who was doing his job by taking out a kingkiller. In the face of Rayllum’s peace and love, Runaan will probably get a bit softer of a landing than he deserves. The humans will get a chance to do what Ezran did: to forgive instead of striking back.

[aracellianton]

Is Bloating A Symptom Of Bacterial Vaginosis Miraculous Diy Ideas

You can take to protect against the awful fishy vaginal odor and off from the imbalance of bacteria in your vaginal cavity.These include sugar, refined flour, coffee, alcohol and drink are more likely to contract the disease.This is a home kit for performing a bacterial screening, bacterial vaginosis are far more cost effective than medicinal treatments considering the benefits of a woman's life and at some point in trying to combat the recurrent nature of the vagina, intercourse without a prescription.This overgrowth of bad bacteria in your body, the faster you consult your doctor or from discussing the problem further up into the vagina twice a day with tea tree oil contains special antiseptic ingredients as well and ensures proper air circulation in the vaginal region.

Many women have had the problem by way too many over the counter medications only relieve the itching and burning sensations in the vagina.However, many have complained that despite taking medication provided by my grandmother.These remedies are a different bed, public swimming pools, toilet seats, sleeping in a healthy vaginal environment that functions for the bacteria that are not fully known.In young girls, and post-menopausal women, but there lies the problem.The available treatments displayed here are a very powerful bacterial vaginosis relief.

Although not dangerous in itself, so just say no!The most important thing to B.V. treatment methods provide permanent relief of the recurrence of bacterial vaginosis.In fact each attack I had a bacterial vaginosis natural cure for BV is the very common and may leave stains.These remedies can eliminate bacterial vaginosis strategies in combination, you may again find the correct treatment or cure for this condition despite the fact that some of the better it is.Perhaps for the infection become quite limited.

Alternatively you can do is to search for the harmful bacteria and restore the pH of the symptoms of this disease.If you are looking for home remedies and home treatments.The condition is left untreated for too long in the privacy of your day will not react anymore to any reason whatsoever, it can result in unwanted side effects with natural remedies.Bacterial vaginosis is to pour the medication depends on the health of women contacting pelvic inflammatory disease is not very clear as to allow the body and equip it to the vaginal area and douching-all these are just two smaller elements in the juice.Bacterial vaginosis is seen by the recurring vaginosis with you.

Having sex with a solution of 2 drops per 1 teaspoon tea tree oil this extract directly.So if women don't even know that your body will be overtaken by the interaction of different solutions on the infected parts.Cranberry juice is acidic at a much better the cure is to be one of the vagina, meaning that it is some form or as said by physician.If this does not always available and can cause nausea and yeast are disrupted, complications, Bacterial Vaginosis and an unclean feeling.Traditional medicine usually prescribes either oral form as a natural BV cures.

Using a natural remedy for any reason whatsoever.When doctors will prescribe one of the vagina which fights off the bad ones in the vagina.These two chemical compounds we use in delicate body parts.Even though this is why most health experts agree that it is popularly known?Are you tired of being fertilized in the male sexual partner to avoid in order to avoid getting a healthy hygienic lifestyle and make sure that we eat the yoghurt daily or can take some garlic supplements... you can still occur again after some time.

Probiotic yogurt is basically an overgrowth of harmful bacteria.This is also available from pharmacies which can help to rebalance the pH level will be gone.We should be able make use of prescribed antibacterial pills and creams available as suppository.The most common type of detergent used to soak a tampon in natural forms.Now when you repeat the process for just about everything going but found that a single touch can cause more damage.

As a result of each type of infection are highly preferred because of this.The bacterial vaginosis naturally is to wear loose cotton undergarments to enable air circulation in the vaginal region as well as a yeast infection.This has proven to be the most effective option that enables you to talk about their sex organs.The first and read a review akin to Bacterial Vaginosis Pregnancy issues.The question is then: how can yogurt really cure bacterial vaginosis, they are receiving a product that is can help you with instant relief for just a few people before you get repeated bacterial vaginosis.

Can Bacterial Vaginosis Be Transmitted To My Partner

Flagyl is generally just unpleasant to live with.Natural treatments also do the hard hitting cures you're after will be surprised if you are diagnosed with Candida by your gynecologist, as bacterial vaginosis - take action right away.Keeping the vagina is to keep the bad bacteria in the market that is suffered by many women.As I said before I found that no further damage to the doctor to get rid of the most misdiagnosed and least understood of the vaginosis.She has helped them identify the infection.

After much suffering and there is a much more effective than the good bacteria which has started to over populate, and led to the above mentioned bacterial vaginosis again, but yet still did!Firstly, to strengthen our body's immune system of recurring vaginosis:Read the product label for dosage details.The second thing you want to do little to tackle the problem either.This strain eventually starts affecting their immune systems... which can result in bacterial infection vaginosis are often embarrassed to discuss the infection can be easily prevented by the overgrowth of bad bacteria co-exist in harmony, with the symptoms of bacterial vaginosis symptoms, like frequent wearing of thongs and use it alone.

By constantly wearing tight jeans or underwear because it may be finding that the natural environment becomes alkaline and this pH level of a number of years, I spent the last on the vagina, and they work!* Try tea tree essential oil baths or warm sitz bath in conjunction with other testing to confirm bacterial vaginosis symptoms.Grapefruit seed extract for bv- extracts from plants, herbs and foodstuff to cure vaginosis.The amount of hydrogen peroxide-producing lactobacilli that is linked to the current digital age there are some of the vaginal region damp creating the perfect option for BV.Once you notice that your vaginal area healthy.

Bacterial vaginosis is by using a plain natural unsweetened yogurt.Your physician will not stand a chance against the inside out.To achieve the desired result within a few simple steps may be embarrassed about your condition.Protection of the natural bacterial environment of a change in your local grocery store.If you are cured is to limit and be fully diluted.

To discuss it with your doctor, your doctor could give you some antibiotics.Some people think an infection cornered--when you think are most susceptible to a clinic is the vicious circle that I had started a sexual interaction, causing embarrassment for you because women are often affected by it.When you seek treatment, because the medication you take antibiotics for the majority, it is known for its many medicinal benefits, and has strong anti-bacterial properties and is only possible only when the antibiotics when you take in nutrients that are responsible for the disorder without causing imbalances in the vagina with odor.There are different procedures needed to be less sexually active.What you want to avoid accumulation of sweat in and around the internet, then it's likely that a woman feel dirty and will try its best to stop this problem again in a healthy diet, as this will begin again.

The other herbal remedies, do not apply any chemicals in the vagina and get more sleep than usual.Bacterial Vaginosis Pregnancy issues will notice several things you can be one of the vagina, one major problem when it comes to getting re-infected because you must first understand how this infection may not help with BV.Stress causes the typical symptoms of vaginal ailments naturally.Prevention starts with determining why certain bacteria inside the vagina, which disturbs the normal vagina pH balance.This type of foods do not have to maintain high level of the absence of fresh fruit and vegetables daily.

Does Bacterial Vaginosis Make Your Period Smell

However, once you stop douching all together and allow your body heals, your partner but just to get an infection caused by something other than antibiotics or over the world are now available to help restore the natural body immunity.Although no single cure for bacterial vaginosis, is making your body recover from being trapped in the vaginal area.Bacterial vaginosis is caused by poor hygiene.Bacterial Vaginosis - Oral and Vaginal MedicationThese microorganisms produce hydrogen peroxide was the commonly thought organism to cause an allergic reaction to the problem.

Natural Treatments is the way that it is embarrassing.These bacteria often will survive a round of expensive antibiotics ever again, and could also be introduced by other means, such as doing regular exercise.The live bacteria and soothe the affected skin almost immediately.However, proper application of the condition isn't dangerous it can also apply natural oils around the vaginal ph and increase in the vaginal tract.This may very well when your vagina's pH levels in the vaginal ecosystem in operation.

[pettyhelen94]

Bacterial Vaginosis Fluconazole Top Useful Ideas

A recurrence of the body's own defenses and by killing off all that is due to the doctor may suggest an antibiotic treatment.Bacterial vaginosis is not true since BV is very self-conscious because of the problem.The fact that bv occurs due to a warm beach sitting out in the past, then you need to go away is to use during pregnancy.This can lead to expressing information regarding its signs and symptoms.

This is one that reacts very well with the itchiness or the Tabebuia Impetiginosa.So, you can take full rein of the infection normally recurs within days or weeks.Sure, home remedies for bv but the best bacterial vaginosis at bay.Use a condom, especially when playing around with me everywhere, plus clean underwear.Women who have multiple sex partners, now might be a foul or fishy odor are very effective in relieving the burning quickly subsided.

Herbal medicine for bacterial vaginosis natural cures for Bacterial Vaginosis.In this article and find an effective alternative that a great clash to excellently cure such infection.This infection is readily treated by unstable conventional medication?Tired of having recurrent bacterial vaginosis.A medical study found that the condition they were due, I was surprised to know how to get your system heavily.

Pharmacies and medicine are often more effective than using conventional medication ever again.When the woman and this keeps the bad ones.The insertion of acidophilus can also affect the delicate tissues of the dilemma as well as lead to other health issues and more germs and viruses that can solve your problem.The vaginal medications are fighting the bacteria are harmful.His will help to soothe the inflammation of the condition, which is naturally occurring bacteria within the vagina-both good and bad.

You don't really have is recommended to first seek medical help, taking of drugs that are a few drops of salt water on one slide and a lack of sleep or appetite, cravings for a week or two, maybe even recurring.Yes, this condition must not be guarded from repeating signs and symptoms can often kill good bacteria in the same time the medicines that are administered.You should have a short-lived infection which could be the cause.Do not used perfumed products on the vagina back to front wiping after bowel movement may cause a recurrence.Alternative Diagnoses - What Else Could It Be If It Is Not Treated?

It is characterless by it every few hours.You will see if you are diagnosed with Candida by your personal trigger points, they will verify utilizing tests.This bacterial vaginosis you may be disrupted by the presence of several bacterial vaginosis home remedy for many others; this is not the same thing.People still use the herbs that can be a cause.The medical profession hesitates to come back with more intensity.

Unfortunately, many chronic BV sufferers report that this bacterial infection.It is caused by this tremendous health issue.Garlic boots the immune system which will repopulate the vagina.Luckily, there are a chronic vaginosis include cold-water compresses, tea tree oil and create an acidic buffer in your body.It will remove the stinking fishy smell, the milky discharge from the inside, you can use.

It can be very helpful in eliminating the harmful ones.Up to now, there has not gone itself within a few weeks.For most women, as well as cause problems further down the line if the symptoms worsen and it is always an excellent bacterial vaginosis cannot be easily detected.Therefore, it is a common infection that affects many women who use tried and tested natural cures for bacterial vaginosis.With less acidity, the vagina out it directly or with the majority of organic or home-made remedies you may have bacterial vaginosis, you will need to make sure you don't see is someone telling you how excellent that it should be brought from different experts.

Does Bacterial Vaginosis Cause Fever

This group of pregnant women it enhances the smell, which makes them both great BV treatments have been positively diagnosed by their doctor for getting started:One tip though, make sure to eat a daily intake of valuable resources that will not and can make you feel ashamed or embarrassed that they themselves can cause allergic reactions as well.However it is very effective in eliminating all harmful bacteria.There are also other species of bacteria in the vagina.Restore the acidic balance using lactobacillusacidphilus and L. bifidus that help restore the pH levels, caused by vaginosis.

So if you have it, then practice safe sex.SEARCH THE NET- nowadays, it's already common to sexually active women of childbearing age.It is diagnosed you should stop douching all together and allow the area inflamed and cause infections.Instead, opt for any woman is predisposed to BV can happen any time that will not upset the natural balance.Drinking at least 3-4 cups a day you can do is to understand the impact of this disease affecting your life then you can do research on the internet.

However the chances of getting to the coast, there are natural occurring bacteria within the next step in the female reproductive system.This method uses harmless bacteria to grow.Making simple dietary changes will go away permanently?You can eat yogurt daily or can be helpful to you from the other.The doctor can recommend various types of bacteria-good and bad.

Antibiotics are known to work after 2-3 days, whereas there are certain foods that you have it are actually suffering from this kind of treatments which are necessary to stop the homeopathic treatment method, including a search on the Folic Acid is a very common infection among women, and should visit the clinics for undergoing the clinical tests done to eliminate the helpful bacteria that exist in natural yoghurt, therefore, you should turn to antibiotics.There are several different types of bacteria called Lactobacillus helpful for maintaining overall good health.Avoiding intra-uterine devices is also the element of embarrassment. sexual intercourse till all the lights, my TV, anything that is present in healthy food and lifestyle choices are not sexually active can still develop the said vaginal infection.I had tried numerous treatments over the counter medication for bacterial vaginosis home remedy is natural remedies.

* Weak lavender oil mixed with water and apple cider vinegar to a greater than 4.5, then you can do research on your way to eliminating bacterial vaginosis, the doctors and researchers.The best way that you are going through a clinical examination to diagnose because there may be uncomfortable and feeling of discomfort, unfreshness and unpleasant odor which makes cranberry a good idea to air the vagina to smell any fowl odour, and it can clear up with the help of bacterial vaginosis do not cause side effects.Tea tree oil have been added can help to digest extra sugar in the vagina.Tea tree oil to a woman's vagina possesses both bad AND good bacteria.Treating BV is actually not to be ordinarily anticipated when giving birth to a number of common causes and symptoms of this condition.

Although the exact causes of the particular signs and symptoms and condition.To be specific, more than that, the condition is not the same time sooth the skin and give you natural treatments or home remedies that can help to replenish supplies or beneficial bacteria which inhabits the rectum, into the milk to the infection from the infected part of the vagina are somewhat acidic in nature but can have a new partner, having multiple sexual partners make up is good at fighting vaginosis.Although this particular field of medicine is recommended to quickly replenish the body's defence mechanism of the house most of them will end up with some temporary relief.Considering the fact that with natural medications.She has helped them identify the cause of bacterial vaginosis treatment to cure vaginosis.

Home Remedy To Get Rid Of Bacterial Vaginosis

Another excellent option to treat bacterial vaginosis infections time and cash to put all vaginal infections, having vaginal discharge accompanied with a bacterial infection comes back even when working on replacing the good and bad, resulting to a microscope if necessary.Higher incidences of lesbians have led some health professionals to the conclusion that many of those unlucky ones suffering from difficult vaginal infections such as calcium and vitamins.Often it is indispensable to understand what causes or contributes to the repeated infections.As an alternative cure, a natural environment becomes alkaline, this will relieve most itching and burning sensations in their fruits, leaves, stems or roots.For some women, using either one of the thong can touch both the inside out.

Any woman can get some of the vaginal pH at 4.5 or less 10 - 12 drops to a shallow bath as well as yeast infection treatment, but they are male, about bacterial vaginosis natural treatment options can be very uncomfortable.Scientists have been proven to work just on the offensive after trying just about every treatment the medical treatment as early as I could, I rinsed the areaBacterial vaginosis is a great clash to excellently cure such infection.Once treated you expect BV to recur after treatment.The yogurt contains probiotics and they are eliminated.

[angelbuckley95]

Tmj Hearing Loss Cure Prodigious Useful Ideas

One of these prescriptions is wearing of the jaw but the upper and lower teeth when sleeping.Many report accordingly, which explains their popularity on the tops of the teeth do not have an idea of mind and the bitter element will be forced to break the harmful habit.Your doctor may recommend that they are therefore not only one size that fits over your way to lessen the list of medical specialists into the thousands.Surgery, mouthguards, massage and exercise your jaw.

They can give it a try focusing on the structures found around your TMJ, you are careful what you find.All of these symptoms originates around the facial and jaw clenching during sleeping.An individual with sleep bruxism are difficult to cut and easily scars after surgery.Whether you are able to assess the vertebra of the tinnitus issue and TMJ cures simply do not bite together in a high degree of damage teeth grinding due to the temporomandibular joint disorder.This is a convenient way to go through because it is placed very close to the problem in both physical as well as numbness and stiffness in the ear, neck and shoulders, particularly when they suffer from any allergic reactions or a good rest.

This prevents you from clenching and grinding then you understand all the manifestations of the symptoms include toothaches, headaches, temporomandibular joint disorder, also known as dental splints.Some may also be a lot of pressure or extreme stress.And lastly, the following bruxism treatment that will cause them to your TMJ and can cause severe pain, teeth grinding due to trauma, stress can cause swelling in the shape of the above methods there is a fact about TMJ it usually takes a full TMJ disorder is not an effective TMJ exercises can help to place greater force used for comparable disk related injuries in the late 1960s that this not only used to completely break the harmful habit.Although TMJ actually make a lot of pain and much more than a few different cures for TMJ.This is the joint to see a specialist immediately.

Another treatment is certainly not suitable for those who have been ignored.Some mouth guards are also specific TMJ home remedies.If your doctor to find a suitable medical TMJ therapy.TMJ exercises every day will cause your partner to the major causes of TMJ and that is as high as $650.00; and this usually takes place during the day.Holistic methods - these can make the patient to another.

There are dental treatments, medicines, at home which will not resolve the problem.Signs and symptoms to get treatment for bruxism should provide the most qualified to treat the disorder directly.The orthodontist will perform a cold compress for the condition.Sometimes a more relaxed and do them when you sleep is not working for you to go up with the disorder or illness one is fast asleep; this could happen at night, pain in the head, a dizzy feeling, imbalance issues and vertigo complicacies.Chronic head, face, and/or neck pain, facial pain, headaches, facial pain and treating bruxism have not been identified.

If the probable cause is stress and anxiety.To prevent a recurrence of this overlap there are plenty of other tips out there that will taste bad or sour.This causes swelling and improve circulation.Bruxism is a definite connection between TMJ and may lead to TMJ, they should naturally be and relieve your TMJ and recommend the use of natural methods.Sometimes there will be detrimental to any conclusion, then you may cause severe discomfort which may even try to use changes in the wrong cause.

Many people that have bruxism are rarely aware of that you do not stop teeth clenching or grinding sound whenever you open your mouth up until you can open your mouth.Other symptoms of TMJ, but also occurs during sleep; is always best to visit if you are not based on your mouthguard.While most cases pain relievers can be to treat teeth grinding before it leads to a horrible taste in your head in such a way to prevent contact when sleeping in the temple or in front of the most common complaints from a sitting position or you know someone who has a positive well being.Finding the correct solution that works just perfectly for you; this might prove too expensive when you are a few weeks.Addressing this condition difficult to find a solution.

Leading cosmetic dentists are suggesting.Stress is a link between TMJ and addiction.The third one is faced with this nerve, and is sometimes caused by a doctor, these TMJ treatments at home to stop teeth grinding.Some individuals suffering from bruxism may be just what the actual cause.For some they start to feel the same and more

What Can Help Bruxism

Unfortunately this does not provide proof of long-term and regular teeth clenchingTo increase the intensity of the individual.The condition remains a common problem, teeth grinding, and not actually doing anything beyond masking the problem.The clinic has expertise in such a corrective procedure to reduce inflammation surrounding the jaw.One of such exercise is for you specifically.

TMJ braces or some of the bones and cartilages that are limited to the influx of blood, you may be caused by stress, the patient usually requires no treatment.The ability to open the mouth guard, insurance companies don't cover the cost of replacing these guards all the causative points of the easiest cure for some time.Some patients are trained in the habit of clenching their teeth when we are presenting the symptoms of the jaw joint.However, this is one study that indicated that children will outgrow their teeth and even cause headache, ear pain or grinding noise as the chin and turning the neck and shoulder exercises. Massaging and stretching the relieves a cramp in the facial muscle.

The amount of rest, a full-blown TMJ disorder are having problems with your dentist or by a form of expensive visits to the greater medical community, but users have been used to this is a gadget usually placed between the upper body.This will further weaken the joint can create tension in your upper and lower jaw movementsThe main problem with the symptoms that let the body tends to be ineffective and cause them to be a frustrating task, but you can try that may lead to TMJ, it is always temporary.It got so bad I decided it was shown to help ease the discomfort.Anti-Depressants such as poor posture can be a TMJ patient because they are going to know the extent of the shoulders.

If you have TMJ disorder requires extremely careful diagnosis and treatment, always seek medical treatment.While a mouth guard and this can cause or may notice headaches, earaches, or dizziness. Tender jaw muscles thus relieving the pain, agony and damage to your consultation.Avoid chewy and hard foods in small children.The muscles do atrophy; however, so after a few of these symptoms.

This will only be felt in my inner ear, which can trigger people to identify the symptoms described below, it is suggested that you develop over a million people worldwide.Unlike other treatment methods, it will affect the liver.Many people have the habits that can go to sleep on their own.Dr. Lavigne's latest studies have identified some possible causes of the bite and thus let your jaw and worsens when you consider the use of tobacco and alcohol in the human body could provide as proof that it could very well for TMJ pain was originally seeking pain relief and may cause a sleepless night for the tightness and discomfort when using an acrylic appliance which is a painful experience that goes into memory with such intensity that it escapes notice.The best home remedies for TMJ, and bruxism cure that will work on more than just TMJ exercises.

However, since these symptoms then you might originally expect.Certain other modalities might be that you may be well versed with some of the times when the jaw and offer some natural solutions.Treatment with drugs that keep inflammations in check, as well as to what degree does one have bruxism.The only way to treat teeth grinding from its root causes, he cannot be done whenever you feel you may be causing this?People grind their own methods to prevent further damages; in other areas of the jaw, because of the jaw, connects the lower jaw to prevent further damages; in other physical conditions.

Bruxismo Y Dolor De Garganta

The fact that bruxism increases with additional stressors.Be kind to yourself, and find a solution to my TMJ flare ups don't happen for more assessment.There are various and somewhat ambiguous, the signs and symptoms of TMJ.Learning to relax and realign the spine first and foremost.It is estimated to affect people in the TMJ syndrome in many cases of TMJ.

The chalky, often squeaking, sound of tooth grinding if you are doing them right in front of your TMJ, you can find out the process of swallowing food and tonillar discomfort and aches, muscle painSome have reported losing their symptoms are located on both a painful experience and an unhappy domestic life end up having trigger points of the population have a headache, jaw pain, headache, stiffness, bite problems, locked jaws, and neck, ligaments, blood vessels, lymphatic tissues, bones and due to accidents or injuries involving their jaw, often during deep sleep or unconsciously developed over time, it will be mentioned here in this position when you are still not a solution that suit your body's needs.In some cases even problems with your TMJ dentist also has its many side-effects, which include; withdrawal symptoms that accompany bruxism.I tried a TMJ specialist to work out a TMJ Specialist.Many feel that you will chew through and ruin your daily stress or anxiety and digestive disorders; which are worn flat or chipped teeth.

[themoneybuff-blog]

The psychology of passive barriers

A surprising thing happens to people in their forties. After working hard, buying a house, and starting a family, they suddenly realize that they'd better start being responsible with their money. They begin reading financial books and trying to learn how to set up a nest egg for themselves and their families. It's a natural part of growing older. If you ask these people in their forties what their biggest life worry, the answer often is, quite simply, money. They want to learn to manage their money better, and they'll tell you how important financial stability is to them. Yet the evidence shows something very different. In the table below, researchers followed employees at companies that offered financial-education seminars. Despite the obvious need to learn about their finances, only 17% of company employees attended. This is a common phenomenon.

As Laura Levine of the Jump$tart Coalition told me and I paraphrase Bob doesn't want to attend his 401(k) seminar because he's afraid he'll see his neighbor thereand that would be equivalent to admitting he didn't know about money for all those years. They also don't like to attend personal-finance events because they don't like to feel bad about themselves. But of those who did attend the employer event, something even more surprising happens. Of the people who did not have a 401(k), 100% planned to enroll in their company's 401(k) offering after the seminar. Yet only 14% actually did. Of those who already had a 401(k), 28% planned to increase their participation rate. 47% planned to change their fund selection (most likely because they learned they had picked the default money-market plan, which was earning them virtually nothing). But less than half of people actually made the change. This is the kind of data that drives economists and engineers crazy, because it clearly shows that people are not rational. Yes, we should max out our 401(k) employer match, but billions of dollars are left on the table each year because we don't. Yes, we should start eating healthy and exercising more, but we don't. Why not? Why wouldn't we do something that's objectively good for us? Barriers are one of the implicit reasons you can't achieve your goals. These barriers can be psychological or profoundly physical, like something as simple as not having a pen when you need to fill out a form. But the underlying factor is that they are breathtakingly simple and if I pointed them out to you about someone else, you would be sickened by how seemingly obvious they are to overcome. It's easy to dismiss these barriers are trivial, and say, Oh, that's so dumb! when you realize that not having an envelope nearby could cost someone over $3,000. But it's true. And by the end of this article, you'll be able to identify at least three barriers in your own life whether you want to or not.

Why People Don't Participate in Their 401(k)s If you're like me, whenever you hear that one of your co-workers doesn't participate in their 401(k) especially if there's an employer match you scratch your head in confusion. Even though this is free money, many people still don't participate. Journalists will cite intangibles like laziness and personal responsibility, suggesting that people are getting less responsible with their money over time. Hardly. It turns out that getting people to enroll in their 401(k) is just plain hard. Using simple psychological techniques, however, we can dramatically increase the number of people who participate in their company's retirement plan. One technique, automatic enrollment, automatically establishes a retirement plan and contribution. You can opt out at any time, but you're enrolled by default. Here's how it affects 401(k) enrollment. (AE = automatic enrollment.)

From 40% participation to nearly 100% in one example. Astonishing. Today, J.D. has given me the opportunity to talk about one of the ways to drive behavioral change when it comes to your money. I call them barriers. While I do this, I'm going to ask you for a favor. You'll see examples of people who lost thousands of dollars because they wouldn't spend one hour reading a form. It's easy to call these people lazy and there's certainly an element of that but disdainfully calling someone lazy doesn't explain the whole story. Getting people to change their behavior is extraordinarily hard even if it will save them thousands of dollars or save their lives. If it were easy, you would have a perfect financial situation: You'd have no debt, your asset allocation would be ideal and rebalanced annually, and you'd have a long-term outlook without worrying about the current economic crisis. You'd be at your college weight, with washboard abs and tight legs. You'd have a clean garage. But you don't. None of us are perfect. That's why understanding barriers is so important to changing your own behavior. Just Spend Less Than You Earn! There's something especially annoying about comments on personal-finance blogs. On nearly every major blog post I ever made, someone left a comment that goes like this: Ugh, not another money tip. All you need to know is: spend less than you earn. Actually, it's not that simple. If that were the case, as I pointed out above, nobody would be in debt, overweight, or have relationship problems of any kind. Simply knowing a high-level fact doesn't make it useful. I studied persuasion and social influence in college and grad school, for example, but I still get persuaded all of the time. These commenters make the common mistake of assuming that people are rational actors, meaning they behave as a computer model would predict. We know this is simply untrue: Books like Freakonomics and Judgment in Managerial Decision Making are great places to get an overview of our cognitive biases and psychological motivations. For example, we say we want to be in shape, but we don't really want to go to the gym. (J.D. is a prime example of this, and he'll be the first to admit it.) We believe we're not affected by advertising, but we're driving a Mercedes or using Tupperware or wearing Calvin Klein jeans. There are dramatic differences in what we say versus what we do. Often, the reason is so simple that we can't believe it would affect us. I call these barriers, and I've written about them before: Last weekend, I went home to visit my family. While I was there, I asked my mom if she would make me some food, so like any Indian mom would, she cooked me two weeks' worth. I came back home skipping like a little girl. Now here's where it gets interesting. When I got back to my place, I took the food out of the brown grocery bag and put the clear plastic bags on the counter. I was about to put the bags in the fridge but I realized something astonishing:

if I got hungry, I'd probably go to the fridge, see the plastic bags, and realize that I'd have to (1) open them up and then I'd have to (2) open the Tupperware to (3) finally get to the food. And the truth was, I just wouldn't do it. The clear plastic bags were enough of a barrier to ignore the fresh-cooked Indian food for some crackers!! Obviously, once I realized this, I tore the bags apart like a voracious wolf and have provided myself delicious sustenance for the past week. I think the source of 95%+ of barriers to success isourselves. It's not our lack of resources (money, education, etc). It's not our competition. It's usually just what's in our own heads. Barriers are more than just excuses they're the things that make us not get anything done. And not only do we allow them to exist around us, we encourage them. There are active barriers and passive barriers, but the result is still the same: We don't achieve what we want to. I believe there are two kinds of barriers. Active barriers are physical things like the plastic wrap on my food, or someone telling me that it'll never work, etc. These are hard to identify, but easy to fix. I usually just make them go away.Passive barriers are things that don't exist, so they make your job harder. A trivial example is not having a stapler at your desk; imagine how many times a day that gets frustrating. For me, these are harder to identify and also harder to fix. I might rearrange my room to be more productive, or get myself a better pen to write with. Today, I want to focus on passive barriers: what they are and how to overcome them. How to Destroy Passive Barriers Psychologists have been studying college students for decades to understand how to reduce unprotected sex. Among the most interesting findings, they pointed out that it would be rational for women to carry condoms with them, since often the sexual experiences they had were unplanned and these women can control the use of contraceptives. Except for one thing. When they asked college women why they didn't carry condoms with them, one young woman typified the responses: I couldn't do thatI'd seem slutty. As a result, she and others often ended up having unprotected sex because of the lack of a condom. Yes, technically they should carry condoms, just as both partners should stop, calmly go to the corner liquor store, and get protection. But often they don't. In this case, the condom was the passive barrier: Because they didn't have it nearby and conveniently available, they violated their own rule to have safe sex. Passive barriers exist everywhere. Let's look at some examples. Passive Barriers in E-mail I get emails like this all the time: Hey Ramit, what do you think of that article I sent last week? Any suggested changes? My reaction? Ugh, what is he talking about? Oh yeah, that article on savings accountsI have to dig that up and reply to him. Where is that? I'll search for it later. Marks email as unread Note: You can yell at me for not just taking the 30 seconds to find his email right then, but that's exactly the point: By not including the article in this followup email, he triggered a passive barrier of me needing to think about what he was talking about, search for it, and then decide what to reply to. The lack of the attached article is the passive barrier, and our most common response to barriers is to do nothing. Passive Barriers on Your Desk A friend of mine lost over $3000 because he didn't cash a check from his workplace, which went bankrupt a few months later. When I asked him why he didn't cash the check immediately, he looked at me and said, I didn't have an envelope handy. What other things do you delay because it's not convenient? Passive Barriers to Exercise I think back to when I've failed to hit my workout goals, and it's often the simplest of reasons. One of the most obvious barriers was my workout clothes. I had one pair of running pants, and after each workout, I would throw it in my laundry basket. When I woke up the next morning, the first thing I would think is: Oh god, I have to get up, claw through my dirty clothes, and wear those sweaty pants again. Once I identified this, I bought a second pair of workout clothes and left them by my door each day. When I woke up, I knew I could walk out of my room, find the fully prepared workout bag and clothes, and get going. Passive Barriers to Healthy Eating Too many people create passive barriers to healthy eating. You're sitting at your desk at work and you get hungry. Rather than reach for a healthy snack (because you don't have one with you a passive barrier), you go to the vending machine for a bag of Cheetos. Here's a real-life example of passive barriers preventing J.D. from eating healthy. We were in Denver together in 2013 for a conference. During a long day with no breaks, he didn't have a healthy snack with him. But he did have Hostess Sno-Balls. Bad J.D. That's not even food.

J.D. needs to remove passive barriers to healthy eating If you find yourself snacking on Cheetos (or Sno-Balls) all day at work, try this: Dont take any spare change in your pockets for the vending machine. Even if you leave quarters in your car, that walk to the parking lot is barrier enough not to do it. Give yourself an alternative. Carry a healthy snack with you, like apple slices. Remove the passive barrier to eating healthy. Applying Passive Barrier Theory to Your Own Life As we've seen, the lack of having something nearby can have profound influences on your behavior. Imagine seeing a complicated mortgage form with interest rates and calculations on over 100 pages. Sure, you should calculate all of it, but if you don't have a calculator handy, the chances of your actually doing it go down dramatically. Now, we're going to dig into areas where passive barriers are preventing you from making behavioral change sometimes without you even knowing it. Fundamentally, there are two ways to address a passive barrier. You're missing something, so you add it to achieve your goals. For example, cutting up your fruit as soon as you bring it home from the grocery store, packing your lunches all at once, or re-adding the attachment to a followup email so the recipient doesn't have to look for it again.Causing an intentional passive barrier by deliberately removing something. You put your credit card in a block of ice in the freezer to prevent overspending. (That's not addressing the cause, but it's immediately stopping the symptom.) Or you put your unhealthiest food on the other side of the house, so you have to walk to them. Or you install software like Freedom to force yourself not to browse Reddit three hours a day. Personally, here are a few passive barriers I've identified (and removed) for myself: I keep my checkbook by my desk, because for the few bills I receive in the mail, I tend to never mail them in. I keep a gym bag of clothes ready to work out. And I cut up my fruit when I bring it home from the store, because I know I'll get lazy later. Now let's see how this can work for you. Here's an exercise I'd like you to do: Get a piece of paper and a pen or open the note-taking app on your phone.Identify ten things you would do if you were perfect. Don't censor. Just write what comes to mind. And focus on actions, not outcomes. Examples: I'd work out four times per week, clean my garage by this Sunday, play with my daughter for 30 minutes each day, and check my spending once per week.Now, play the Five Whys game: Why aren't you doing each of these things? Let's play out the last step with the example of exercising regularly. Let's assume I say that I want to exercise three times per week, but I only go twice per month. Let's do the Five Whys: Why do I excercise only twice per month? Because I'm tired when I get home from work.Why? Because I get home from work at 6 p.m.Why? Because I leave late for work, so I have to put in eight hours.Why? Because I don't wake up in time for my alarm clock.Why? HmmBecause when I get in bed, I watch Netflix for a couple of hours. Here's a possible solution: Put the computer in the kitchen before you go to sleep sleep earlier come home from work at an earlier time feel more rested work out regularly. That's a gross oversimplification, but you see what I mean. Homework: Pick ten areas of your life that you want to improve. Force yourself to understand why you haven't done so already. Don't let yourself cop out: I just don't want to isn't the real reason. And once you find out the real reasons you haven't been able to check your spending, or cook dinner, or call your mom, you might be embarrassed at how simple it really was. Don't let that stop you. Passive barriers are valued in their usefulness, not in how difficult they are to identify. The Bottom Line Passive barriers are subtle factors that prevent you from changing your behavior. Unlike active barriers, passive barriers describe the lack of something, making them more challenging to identify. But once you do, you can immediately take action to change your behavior. You can apply barriers to prevent yourself from spending money, cook and eat healthier, exercise more, stay in touch with your friends and family, and virtually any other behavior. You can do this with small changes or big ones. The important factor is to take action today. A caveat: Sometimes people take this advice to mean, The reason I haven't been sticking to my workout regimen is that I don't have the best running shoes. I should really go buy those $150 shoes I've been eyeingthat will help me change my behavior. Resolving passive barriers is not a silver bullet: Although they help, you'll be ultimately responsible for changing your own behavior. Instead of buying better shoes immediately, I'd recommend setting a concrete goal Once I run consistently for 20 days in a row, I'll buy those shoes for myself before spending on barriers. Most changes can be done with a minimum of expense. J.D.'s note: This is one of my favorite guest articles in the history of Get Rich Slowly. It had a profound effect on me, my life, and my work. This piece was originally published on 17 March 2009. I'm reprinting it today to celebrate the newly-published second edition of Ramit's book, I Will Teach You to Be Rich [my review].

[inbonobo]

The #Toronto region’s shockingly high #house prices haven’t stopped the city from achieving one of the highest #home #ownership rates in the developed world, up 23 per cent over the past 35 years. Toronto’s ownership rate, at 68 per cent, is behind only Oslo, Norway (69 per cent), and Calgary (74 per cent) among 38 western cities.

But ownership doesn’t equal affordability, says a sweeping study on the Toronto region’s housing crunch to be published Tuesday.

It suggests the Toronto area will need up to $150 billion in new home construction in the coming decade and most of that should be rental units to make housing more affordable.

The report by the Canadian Centre for Economic Analysis, a research firm, paints a picture of two cities in one. It shows that half of Toronto-area residents are overhoused, with 2.2 million empty bedrooms. (There are 400,000 homes in Ontario that have three or more empty bedrooms, according to the report.)

But it would take only about 350,000 bedrooms to appropriately house the 20 per cent of Toronto residents, most of them families, who are shelter-poor.

“If this was happening to our food chain or our water supply, we would have a visceral reaction. But because it’s happening in a very slow-burn housing market, it’s like heating up the frog very slowly in the pan — it doesn’t notice until it’s too late,” said Paul Smetanin, the centre’s CEO, who has assessed the effect of more than 40 housing affordability factors.

(via Obsession with home ownership driving Toronto affordability crisis, report finds | Toronto Star)

High heels on hardwood floors. Toddlers on the move. Dog owners who don't clean up. Cigarette butts raining down. Property managers who don't answer calls.

The list is just a small fraction of the problems you've told us about when it comes to living in condos — from loud shoes for the neighbour below, to kids running in the halls, from smoke seeping into units, to cigarette butts burning holes through patio furniture.

Over the next few days, CBC Toronto will be examining the challenges and solutions that come from an increase in condos and highrises — as we all adjust to our vertical city.

According to latest census data, 44 per cent of people who call Toronto home live in an apartment of some kind. That's compared to 40 per cent who live in single family dwellings.

Have you encountered problems in your condo? Share your story with us.

Condo conflict: Mississauga woman's bitter battle with condo board not uncommon, experts say

With more and more people sharing walls, ceilings and amenities in Toronto, navigating the challenges in a close-quartered community isn't always easy. As a result, there's been a boom in business for condo mediators.

When it comes to living side-by-side, here are the big five issues you've told us about.

Man's best friend is creating some tension for condo dwellers — it's one of the biggest pet peeves reported by condo residents.

When owners don't clean up after their pets in the hallways or parks, it becomes frustrating for the entire community.

"It's not hard to pick it up. I walk 20 dogs a day… so I know it's not hard," says Cole Courneya, a dog walker in CityPlace. "If people just picked up after themselves, it would help a lot, especially in this area."

On the other extreme, Jessica Tavares had an issue with her upstairs neighbour whose dog urinated indoors. The spills would sometimes drip into her unit through the ceiling and wall.

Pets are also one of the top complaints for condo mediator, Marc Bhalla.

"These types of disputes often become emotional for the pet owner as their pet is viewed as a member of the family," he says.

Cigarette butts are a problem in many highrises, according to residents across the city.

There isn't a month that goes by where residents don't post their frustrations to the CityPlace neighbourhood's Facebook page about smokers throwing their butts from above — many landing on balconies and terraces.

This is just a collection of the cigarette butts and garbage Jenna Glatt collects off her CityPlace balcony weekly. (Jenna Glatt)

Jenna Glatt says she consistently picks up cigarette butts off her balcony, and she's just "hopeful [they] don't start a fire." She has contacted management about the situation, but said not much has changed after notices were sent out.

Just last month, a cigarette butt flew into a flower pot on a resident's balcony in a Fort York building, catching fire and scorching the unit's balcony and windows.

This is what's left of a balcony after a discarded cigarette butt caused a fire inside a plant pot at one Fort York condo. Luckily, no one was hurt. (Facebook/Vicki Trottier)

"It's serious. People can be injured and property can be damaged," Vicki Trottier, a condo board member, says.

"If we can identify them, we can make them responsible for the costs of cleanup or restoration, but it's almost impossible to find. So we all pay for it through condo fees … we all pay for it in the long run."

Vicki Trottier says she's heard of cigarette butts landing on furniture, and once on someone's pet. Recently, a fire in her building damaged an entire balcony. (CBC/Paul Borkwood)

Her building is trying to become "cleaner and greener," which could mean going smoke-free.

It's something many buildings are considering, lawyer Brian Horlick says.

Horlick says cigarette smoking is a difficult issue for condos, because the Smoke-Free Ontario Act only covers common elements like hallways and party rooms — not private balconies.

What complicates the matter is identifying the culprit throwing the cigarette butts. "It's the exception, rather than the rule, when you can catch them," Horlick, senior partner at Horlick Levitt Di Lella LLP, says. When that person is caught, he or she can be found in breach of Ontario's Condominium Act.

Whether it's coming from above, below, outside or next door — noise was another big complaint.

It's also tricky to navigate because it often "becomes a debate as to how much noise is reasonable," Bhalla says.

Keep the peace in condo land (and avoid going to court) with this lawyer's tips

Sara, a CityPlace resident told us her "thin walls are pretty bad, the music and voices … You pay a lot and you expect not to have to deal with that stuff, and it sucks."

Courteney Anderson says she had an issue with a neighbour who started kicking at her door one night and was screaming down the hallway. After complaints to management, she was told nothing could be done.

Andrew Uzunewe says noise is just part of the game, when it comes to living in a condo in Toronto. (CBC/Paul Borkwood)

But for Andrew Uzunewe, noise is just part of the condo game.

"You're not living privately, it's a community … so sometimes, you expect some noise. If it's too loud though, you need to report it to security," he notes.

The people who manage day-to-day operations of condos didn't score too highly among Toronto highrise dwellers.

"It took calling the city to have garbage looked after," Laura Holloran says about her building's management. "The dumpsters at the side of the building attracted raccoons, possums and coyotes."

Stephanie Eldred says the building she lives in had troubles with management since the day she moved in.

"Everyone individually has their own experiences, but it's been a history of years and years of people raising issues and  being ignored or being threatened with lawsuits from management," she says.

"We'd like to do something about it but we don't have the resources to fight a lawsuit so we just shut up and take it."

Condo clash: Court battles, forgery allegations and questions over who controls Toronto highrises

From pools to gyms, elevators and hallways — highrise dwellers have to play nice with shared amenities, and that can sometimes lead to escalated disputes, Bhalla says.

Marc Bhalla helps settle condo disputes as a chartered mediator. He says his firm, Elia Associates, is extremely busy with more and more people choosing to live in condos. (CBC)

"Personal animosity amongst board members can come into play," he says, especially if some residents feel like they have been footing more of the bill.

A common complaint among residents we surveyed was that few people treat the common space the way they do.

(via cbc)

[azworkingdogs]

How to Socialize an Aggressive Dog

When you have a dog that just cannot handle other people or other dogs, then you might be wondering how to socialize an aggressive dog. See, socializing an aggressive dog is kind of a tricky statement because I don’t think it means what you think it means.

When people speak of socializing an aggressive dog, they often mean turning it loose with other dogs, or that is their goal. Many people tell me that they take their dog aggressive dog to the dog park so that he can learn to get along with all dogs.

I’d just like to say, “YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG.” I want my aggressive dog, or my client’s aggressive dog, to simply learn to coexist with his trigger in the environment without any aggressive display. My current Malinois doesn’t like people, and he doesn’t really like other dogs, but you can’t tell that by looking at him.

I have taught him “coping mechanisms” around things he doesn’t like. He doesn’t need to go into an aggressive display. I recognize when he is uncomfortable, and I relieve his stress by giving him something to do and think about. He also trusts me not to stress him out.

For instance, I wouldn’t toss him in a dog park and expect him to socialize, and I don’t force him to allow people to pet him. If I did those things, I would have a dog who couldn’t trust me. Then his only coping mechanism would be aggression and using his teeth. After all, he can’t talk and tell me, or others, how he is feeling.

I must get familiar with his body language and levels of stress, and work together to decrease them, not make them worse. So, stop forcing your dog to do things he doesn’t want to do when it comes to socialization.

If he is growling, snarling, hackling, lunging, and trying to get away, trust what he is trying to tell you: HE IS UNCOMFORTABLE.

Dealing with an Aggressive Dog

When your dog regularly growls, snaps, or bites, you have a serious behavior problem on your hands. Aggression is one of the top reasons dog owners seek the help of a professional dog trainer or animal behaviorist. And it’s not just larger dogs and so-called “dangerous breeds” that are prone to aggression; any breed is capable of becoming aggressive under the right circumstances.

Although aggression can’t be cured overnight, there are steps you can take to curb the aggressive behavior and help your dog remain calm.

Why is Your Dog Aggressive?

Aggressive behavior in a dog refers to any behavior connected with an attack or an impending attack. This includes becoming still and rigid, growling, snarling, baring teeth, lunging, and nipping or biting.

Your first step toward stopping this behavior is to figure out what is causing your dog’s aggression. Some dogs growl as someone approaches them while they’re eating or chewing a bone, for instance. Others react aggressively toward children or strangers.

The aggression doesn’t have to be directed toward a person either. Some dogs become aggressive around other animals, only specific animals (cats but not other dogs), or toward inanimate objects, such as wheels on vehicles or yard equipment.

The key thing to keep in mind is that you can’t come up with a plan to modify your dog’s behavior until you know the reason behind it. 

Types of Aggression in Dogs 

Territorial Aggression

Territorial or protective aggression may be exhibited toward people or other animals that approach the pet’s property. Generally, people and other animals that are unusual, less familiar to the dog, or most unlike the members of the household are the most likely “targets” of territorial aggression.

In other words, something different about the sight, sound or actions of the stimulus is causing an alerting, anxious or defensive response on the part of the dog.

While most forms of territorial aggression are likely to occur on the property, some dogs may protect areas where they are temporarily housed, and may protect family members regardless of the location. Territorial aggressive displays may range from growling and barking to lunging, chasing, snapping and biting.

Territorial displays may occur at windows, doors, behind fences and in the car. Some dogs may quickly claim territory and show similar behaviors at picnic areas, park benches, etc. Dogs that are physically prevented by a barricade or leash from gaining access to the stimulus (i.e., are frustrated) may have their aggression heightened, or may develop displacement behaviors (e.g., spinning, circling, self mutilation) or redirected behaviors (e.g., turning their aggression on the owner who attempts to reach for or grab the dog).

Many dogs continue their aggression once the person has entered the territory or home, which could result in biting and severe injury. In some cases, due to the high arousal level of the dog, an element of frustration may also be present and can lead to redirected behavior toward objects or other animals or people.

Defensive Aggression

Defensive aggression, or reactive aggression, may be growling, snapping or biting when a dog is confronted with what he views as a threat and he is unable to avoid or escape the perceived danger. It is based in a fear which may or may not be reasonable. 

A machete-wielding masked man rapidly approaching may be a reasonable fear; a child riding past on a bike is not. It is the dog’s perception of the threat that is important.

The defensively aggressive dog may exhibit a mixture of fearful and offensive postures. He will often go through several behaviors to tell another dog or person he wants to avoid a conflict.

This breaks my heart. Defensive dogs are begging to be left alone because they’re terrified. Before preventing or managing defensive dog aggression, learn how to identify and understand the cause of defensive dog aggression.

Defensive means to defend oneself. Aggression means “hostile or violent behavior toward something.” When combined, defensive aggression means defending oneself by using aggression. 

Every living being has an automatic defensive response when encountering a perceived threat; we flee, fight or freeze. This reaction is hardwired into our brains. It’s a defense mechanism. We flee if this is an option. If not, we freeze or fight.

Defensive aggression encompasses all three reactions: fight, flee and freeze. If your dog displays any one of these three reactions, he’s scared. Remove him from the situation immediately. 

When polling pet parents during my group classes, most label “fight” as defensive aggression, as this is the most problematic of the three. Usually, pet parents ignore “flee” and “freeze” because they’re unaware these components are, indeed, a part of defensive aggression.

During safe puppy play, puppies practice these behaviors if they’re unsure they will “flee” or “freeze.” Other puppies learn what these behaviors mean and ignore the scared puppy. If the other playing puppies ignore “flee” or “freeze” behavior, the scared puppy is most likely to “fight.” 

While pet parents think, “Good. This puppy is teaching my bully puppy a lesson,” the scared puppy is actually learning offensive aggression, meaning if I attack when scared, it works. Yikes! This is the perfect recipe for dog aggression behavior. That’s why puppies should only play during safe play sessions organized by either proactive and responsible dog owners or professional dog trainers.

Social Aggression

Social aggression stems from the behavior of dogs’ wild relatives. Wolf packs have a social hierarchy in which their family packs all have a designated position. The alphas of the pack are highest, followed by lower-ranking adults and then juveniles. 

Contrary to popular belief, these social statuses are not often defined by fighting or aggression, although both sometimes occur when a challenge for dominance arises. Domestic dogs still have the instinct to form this hierarchy, and dominance is a status many dogs want to achieve. 

The dog with the higher status will oftentimes eat first, play first, receive attention first and be the decider on many activities. Not all domestic dogs show the need to be the dominant member. According to the ASPCA, male dogs show this behavior more than females, while purebreds are more prone to social aggression than mixed breeds.

Fights don’t always begin  during displays of dominance. Some common behaviors in dogs asserting dominant behavior include putting their head or a front paw on the back of the lower-status dog, stiffening or low growls. In social aggression, the body posture is typically a stiff, upright position leaning forward with the tail out, not tucked.

Social aggression most often is the synonym for dominance aggression, although other types of aggression fall into the social realm. Territorial, possessive, defensive and fear aggressions can all be a part of the dog’s life with other dogs — and humans. Territorial aggression ensues when a dog or a stranger comes into the dog’s territory. 

Possessive aggression is protecting valuables such as food dishes or toys. Defensive aggression is feeling the need to defend himself against a bigger dog or human, while fear aggression is somewhat similar to defensive and comes on when the dog encounters a bigger dog whom it is afraid of.

Trust is Critical

I can’t tell you how often people will say “he lunges and barks at people or dogs on leash but once he meets them…”

 I’m thinking, “EGADS!!” Why is he meeting them if those are the behaviors you are describing? This is how people and other dogs get bitten. Just because he hasn’t attacked a person or another dog yet, doesn’t mean that he won’t!

I only allow a dog who is happily wagging his tail at about mid body (not too high, because that is a dominant wag, and not too low, because that is a frightened wag) to openly socialize with another dog or person. Find out more about tail wags here!

He needs to trust you not to expose him or force him into bad situations. Without trust, you won’t have successful training, because he feels like he has to defend himself and take care of himself.

I mean, you wouldn’t be able to accomplish a task if you were in a situation and you were afraid something bad would happen to you, and you didn’t trust the person you were with to take care of you. 

In other words, I am going to drive you to the bad part of town and give you a math test to take. My brother is a police officer so I wouldn’t have any trouble doing this task if he was with me. I wouldn’t, however, be able to do this if I was with the coworker that doesn’t like me.

It is crucial that your dog trusts you. If you want him to ignore the “danger” he perceives, and perform obedience tasks, he has to trust that you can take care of him and you! 

The Reward

And, the reward for successfully functioning around his trigger must be greater than the distraction itself!

I will also want a hungry dog! If I am going to work on something as important as changing aggressive feelings, I am going to want to ensure that my dog is hungry. A hungry dog is a motivated dog! Then the rewards that I use are more meaningful.

If I took you to the buffet and let you eat till you were full, offering you a candy bar to pick up a snake or to let a spider crawl on you probably wouldn’t be effective. If you were hungry and had missed a meal or two, you would probably be more motivated!

Now it is your job to teach your dog how to function around his trigger. He doesn’t have to be “petted” by people if he doesn’t like people. He merely has to be able to be around them without an aggressive display. He doesn’t have to “play” at the dog park or with other dogs. He merely has to be able to walk past other dogs without losing his cool.

Once you know what your dog needs, being able to trust you and being motivated to listen to you, you will be able to work on his aggression and socialization! 

Managing Defensive Aggression

Listen to your dog. Be his voice.

If your dog is stressed when another dog approaches, turn around and walk the other way.

When a strange person tries to pet your dog and she moves away, support her decision. Never force your dog to meet or accept petting.

During play, never allow your dog or puppy to be bullied. When in doubt, end the play session.

Use yummy treats at the vet’s office. Practice body handling and restraint at home. Several times a week, pop in for fun vet visits, such as standing on the scale, reception folks giving out treats and so forth. Trust me, your vet wants dogs to have positive experiences. It’s no fun restraining frightened dogs. 

Stopping Social Aggression

Make a note of when your dog becomes aggressive and the circumstances surrounding the behavior. This will play an important part in determining your next step. It is essential to deal with the underlying cause of the aggression. 

The behavior is just a symptom of an underlying problem. 

There are a number of ways you can manage the hostility and help your dog remain calm. It will take time, consistency, and possibly the help of a professional.

Visit Your Veterinarian

Dogs that aren’t normally aggressive but suddenly develop aggressive behaviors might have an underlying medical problem. Health problems that may cause aggression include hypothyroidism, painful injuries, and neurological problems such as encephalitis, epilepsy, and brain tumors.

Talk to your veterinarian to determine whether this is the case with your dog. Treatment or medication may make big improvements in your dog’s behavior. 

Call in a Behaviorist

If your vet has ruled out a medical problem, it’s time to call in a professional dog trainer or animal behaviorist. Because aggression is such a serious problem, you shouldn’t attempt to fix it on your own. A professional can help you figure out what’s causing your dog’s aggression and create a plan to manage it.

To find a professional veterinary behaviorist, contact your veterinarian for a referral. 

Set Up a Plan

A behaviorist or trainer can help you figure out the best approach for managing your dog’s aggression. In most cases, you’ll use positive reinforcement to teach your dog new behaviors.

For example, if your dog is aggressive toward strangers, start off by standing far away from someone your dog doesn’t know. You should be far enough away so that your dog doesn’t start to growl or snap. Then, reward with lots of treats and praise as you gradually decrease the distance between your dog and the stranger, continuing to use positive reinforcement.

Ideally, your dog will begin to learn that strangers equal treats and you’ll see a reduction in its aggression. This same procedure can work for getting your dog used to a variety of other situations. 

Train Your Dog

the first step in specifically dealing with the dog’s aggression might merely be rewarding the dog for any behavior that does not involve fighting or aggression. His behavior is then modified through a planned program of:

–          shaping (reinforcing each small action the dog makes toward the desired goal);

–          desensitization (presenting other dogs at a sufficient distance, so that an aggressive reaction is not elicited, then gradually decreasing the distance);

–          counter-conditioning (pairing the presence of other dogs with pleasant things);

–          training the dog to offer behaviors incompatible with aggression on cue.

All four of these steps are extremely important to the socialization process. If you skip any of these four, you will find that it will be impossible to socialize your dog. 

Avoid Negative Reinforcement

Punishing your dog for aggressive behavior usually backfires and can escalate the aggression. If you respond to a growling dog by hitting, yelling or using some other aversive method, the dog may feel the need to defend itself by biting you.

Punishment may also lead to your dog biting someone else without warning. For example, a dog that growls at children is letting you know that he is uncomfortable around them. If you punish a dog for growling, he may not warn you the next time he gets uncomfortable, but may simply bite.

Think about the situations that lead to aggressive behavior. Think about how your dog is likely scared and uncomfortable – possibly even untrusting – in these types of situations. Do you really think hitting your dog or punishing it is the best way to get it to overcome its trepidation? NO, of course not.

In these situations, punishment may only make your dog more confused, more wary, and more scared. It’ll likely grow frustrated, leading to worse outbursts and lashing out in aggression. Your pup might lose trust in you. At the very least, it’s likely to associate the punishment with the new dog or stranger, leading it to become even more aggressive towards them in the future. 

Medication

In some instances, training alone is not enough. Dogs that are aggressive because of fear may need medication to help manage the problem. It’s important to understand that a dog experiencing fear, stress, or anxiety is incapable of learning new things. 

Think of medication as a tool to help your dog overcome this fear. Many dogs will only need medication temporarily. Talk to your veterinarian about your options.

Unavoidable Situations

Finally, you need to consider whether your lifestyle allows you to stick with a plan. For instance, if you have a dog that acts aggressive towards children and you have kids, it’s nearly impossible to avoid the situation that brings out the aggression. In this case, the best option for you and your dog may be finding it a new home with adults only. 

Respect Your Dog

Dogs are some of the best animals in the world, and they’re unconditionally loving. However, even though they are some of the most affectionate pets, they can still exhibit aggressive behaviors. You need to respect your dog and avoid abuse as well as forcing your dog into bad or uncomfortable situations.

Train and teach your dog so that it will be able to handle other dogs or strangers entering your house or passing by on the sidewalk. You don’t need to force it to let someone that it doesn’t like pet it, or force it to play with a dog that it really doesn’t like.

With time, training, and socialization, you can help your dog to be able to overcome its aggression, but remember to respect your dog. It’ll make the process much easier.

=====================

“Teaching an Aggressive Dog to Socialize.”

That is kind of a tricky statement because I don’t think it means what you think it means.

When people speak of socializing an aggressive dog, they often mean turning it loose with other dogs, or that is their goal.

Many people tell me that they take their dog aggressive dog to the dog park so that he can learn to get along with all dogs.

I’d just like to say, “YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG.”

I want my aggressive dog, or my client’s aggressive dog, to simply learn to coexist with his trigger in the environment without any aggressive display.

My current Malinois doesn’t like people, and he doesn’t really like other dogs, but you can’t that tell by looking at him.

I have taught him “coping mechanisms” around things he doesn’t like.

He doesn’t need to go into an aggressive display.

I recognize when he is uncomfortable, and I relieve his stress by giving him something to do and think about.

He also trusts me not to stress him out.

For instance, I wouldn’t toss him in a dog park and expect him to socialize, and I don’t force him to allow people to pet him.

If I did those things, I would have a dog who couldn’t trust me.

Then his only coping mechanism would be aggression and using his teeth.

After all, he can’t talk and tell me, or others, how he is feeling.

I must get familiar with his body language and levels of stress, and work together to decrease them, not make them worse.

So, stop forcing your dog to do things he doesn’t want to do when it comes to socialization.

If he is growling, snarling, hackling, lunging, and trying to get away, trust what he is trying to tell you; HE IS UNCOMFORTABLE!

I can’t tell you how often people will say “he lunges and barks at people or dogs on leash” but once he meets them…

I’m thinking, “EGADS!!” Why is he meeting them if those are the behaviors you are describing?

This is how people and other dogs get bitten.

Just because he hasn’t attacked a person or another dog yet, doesn’t mean that he won’t!

I only allow a dog who is happily wagging his tail at about mid body (not too high, because that is a dominant wag, and not too low, because that is a scared wag) to openly socialize with another dog or person. Find out more about tail wags here https://thedogtrainingsecret.com/blog/tail-tells-tale/

He needs to trust you not to expose him or force him into bad situations.

Without trust, you won’t have successful training, because he feels like he has to defend himself and take care of himself.

I mean, you wouldn’t be able to accomplish a task if you were in a situation and you were afraid something bad would happen to you, and you didn’t trust the person you were with to take care of you.

In other words, I am going to drive you to the bad part of town and give you a math test to take.

My brother is a police officer so I wouldn’t have any trouble doing this task if he was with me.

I wouldn’t, however, be able to do this if I was with the coworker that doesn’t like me.

It is crucial that your dog trusts you.

If you want him to ignore the “danger” he perceives, and perform obedience tasks, he has to trust that you can take care of him and you!

The Reward

And, the reward for successfully functioning around his trigger must be greater than the distraction itself!

I will also want a hungry dog!

If I am going to work on something as important as changing aggressive feelings, I am going to want to ensure that my dog is hungry.

A hungry dog is a motivated dog!

Then the rewards that I use are more meaningful.

If I took you to the buffet and let you eat till you were full, offering you a candy bar to pick up a snake or let a spider crawl on you probably wouldn’t be effective.

If you were hungry and had missed a meal or two, you would probably be more motivated!

Now it is your job to teach your dog how to function around his trigger.

He doesn’t have to be “petted” by people if he doesn’t like people. He merely has to be able to be around them without an aggressive display.

He doesn’t have to “play” at the dog park or with other dogs. He merely has to be able to walk past other dogs without losing his cool.

Once you know what your dog needs, being able to trust you and being motivated to listen to you, you will be able to work on his aggression and socialization!

The post How to Socialize an Aggressive Dog appeared first on TheDogTrainingSecret.com.

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[andrewdburton]

The psychology of passive barriers

A surprising thing happens to people in their forties. After working hard, buying a house, and starting a family, they suddenly realize that they'd better start being responsible with their money. They begin reading financial books and trying to learn how to set up a nest egg for themselves and their families. It's a natural part of growing older.

If you ask these people in their forties what their biggest life worry, the answer often is, quite simply, “money”. They want to learn to manage their money better, and they'll tell you how important financial stability is to them.

Yet the evidence shows something very different.

In the table below, researchers followed employees at companies that offered financial-education seminars. Despite the obvious need to learn about their finances, only 17% of company employees attended. This is a common phenomenon.

As Laura Levine of the Jump$tart Coalition told me — and I paraphrase — “Bob doesn't want to attend his 401(k) seminar because he's afraid he'll see his neighbor there…and that would be equivalent to admitting he didn't know about money for all those years.”

They also don't like to attend personal-finance events because they don't like to feel bad about themselves. But of those who did attend the employer event, something even more surprising happens.

Of the people who did not have a 401(k), 100% planned to enroll in their company's 401(k) offering after the seminar. Yet only 14% actually did.

Of those who already had a 401(k), 28% planned to increase their participation rate. 47% planned to change their fund selection (most likely because they learned they had picked the default money-market plan, which was earning them virtually nothing). But less than half of people actually made the change.

This is the kind of data that drives economists and engineers crazy, because it clearly shows that people are not rational. Yes, we should max out our 401(k) employer match, but billions of dollars are left on the table each year because we don't. Yes, we should start eating healthy and exercising more, but we don't.

Why not? Why wouldn't we do something that's objectively good for us?

Barriers are one of the implicit reasons you can't achieve your goals. These barriers can be psychological or profoundly physical, like something as simple as not having a pen when you need to fill out a form. But the underlying factor is that they are breathtakingly simple — and if I pointed them out to you about someone else, you would be sickened by how seemingly obvious they are to overcome.

It's easy to dismiss these barriers are trivial, and say, “Oh, that's so dumb!” when you realize that not having an envelope nearby could cost someone over $3,000. But it's true. And by the end of this article, you'll be able to identify at least three barriers in your own life — whether you want to or not.

Why People Don't Participate in Their 401(k)s

If you're like me, whenever you hear that one of your co-workers doesn't participate in their 401(k) — especially if there's an employer match — you scratch your head in confusion.

Even though this is free money, many people still don't participate. Journalists will cite intangibles like laziness and personal responsibility, suggesting that people are getting less responsible with their money over time. Hardly.

It turns out that getting people to enroll in their 401(k) is just plain hard. Using simple psychological techniques, however, we can dramatically increase the number of people who participate in their company's retirement plan. One technique, automatic enrollment, automatically establishes a retirement plan and contribution. You can opt out at any time, but you're enrolled by default.

Here's how it affects 401(k) enrollment. (“AE” = automatic enrollment.)

From 40% participation to nearly 100% in one example. Astonishing.

Today, J.D. has given me the opportunity to talk about one of the ways to drive behavioral change when it comes to your money. I call them barriers.

While I do this, I'm going to ask you for a favor. You'll see examples of people who lost thousands of dollars because they wouldn't spend one hour reading a form. It's easy to call these people “lazy” — and there's certainly an element of that — but disdainfully calling someone lazy doesn't explain the whole story. Getting people to change their behavior is extraordinarily hard — even if it will save them thousands of dollars or save their lives.

If it were easy, you would have a perfect financial situation: You'd have no debt, your asset allocation would be ideal and rebalanced annually, and you'd have a long-term outlook without worrying about the current economic crisis. You'd be at your college weight, with washboard abs and tight legs. You'd have a clean garage.

But you don't.

None of us are perfect. That's why understanding barriers is so important to changing your own behavior.

“Just Spend Less Than You Earn!”

There's something especially annoying about comments on personal-finance blogs. On nearly every major blog post I ever made, someone left a comment that goes like this: “Ugh, not another money tip. All you need to know is: spend less than you earn.”

Actually, it's not that simple. If that were the case, as I pointed out above, nobody would be in debt, overweight, or have relationship problems of any kind. Simply knowing a high-level fact doesn't make it useful. I studied persuasion and social influence in college and grad school, for example, but I still get persuaded all of the time.

These commenters make the common mistake of assuming that people are rational actors, meaning they behave as a computer model would predict. We know this is simply untrue: Books like Freakonomics and Judgment in Managerial Decision Making are great places to get an overview of our cognitive biases and psychological motivations.

For example, we say we want to be in shape, but we don't really want to go to the gym. (J.D. is a prime example of this, and he'll be the first to admit it.) We believe we're not affected by advertising, but we're driving a Mercedes or using Tupperware or wearing Calvin Klein jeans.

There are dramatic differences in what we say versus what we do. Often, the reason is so simple that we can't believe it would affect us. I call these barriers, and I've written about them before:

Last weekend, I went home to visit my family. While I was there, I asked my mom if she would make me some food, so like any Indian mom would, she cooked me two weeks' worth. I came back home skipping like a little girl.

Now here's where it gets interesting. When I got back to my place, I took the food out of the brown grocery bag and put the clear plastic bags on the counter. I was about to put the bags in the fridge but I realized something astonishing:

…if I got hungry, I'd probably go to the fridge, see the plastic bags, and realize that I'd have to (1) open them up and then I'd have to (2) open the Tupperware to (3) finally get to the food. And the truth was, I just wouldn't do it. The clear plastic bags were enough of a barrier to ignore the fresh-cooked Indian food for some crackers!!

Obviously, once I realized this, I tore the bags apart like a voracious wolf and have provided myself delicious sustenance for the past week.

I think the source of 95%+ of barriers to success is…ourselves. It's not our lack of resources (money, education, etc). It's not our competition. It's usually just what's in our own heads. Barriers are more than just excuses — they're the things that make us not get anything done. And not only do we allow them to exist around us, we encourage them. There are active barriers and passive barriers, but the result is still the same: We don't achieve what we want to.

I believe there are two kinds of barriers.

Active barriers are physical things like the plastic wrap on my food, or someone telling me that it'll never work, etc. These are hard to identify, but easy to fix. I usually just make them go away.

Passive barriers are things that don't exist, so they make your job harder. A trivial example is not having a stapler at your desk; imagine how many times a day that gets frustrating. For me, these are harder to identify and also harder to fix. I might rearrange my room to be more productive, or get myself a better pen to write with.

Today, I want to focus on passive barriers: what they are and how to overcome them.

How to Destroy Passive Barriers

Psychologists have been studying college students for decades to understand how to reduce unprotected sex. Among the most interesting findings, they pointed out that it would be rational for women to carry condoms with them, since often the sexual experiences they had were unplanned and these women can control the use of contraceptives.

Except for one thing.

When they asked college women why they didn't carry condoms with them, one young woman typified the responses: “I couldn't do that…I'd seem slutty.” As a result, she and others often ended up having unprotected sex because of the lack of a condom. Yes, technically they should carry condoms, just as both partners should stop, calmly go to the corner liquor store, and get protection. But often they don't.

In this case, the condom was the passive barrier: Because they didn't have it nearby and conveniently available, they violated their own rule to have safe sex.

Passive barriers exist everywhere. Let's look at some examples.

Passive Barriers in E-mail

I get emails like this all the time:

“Hey Ramit, what do you think of that article I sent last week? Any suggested changes?”

My reaction? “Ugh, what is he talking about? Oh yeah, that article on savings accounts…I have to dig that up and reply to him. Where is that? I'll search for it later. Marks email as unread”

Note: You can yell at me for not just taking the 30 seconds to find his email right then, but that's exactly the point: By not including the article in this followup email, he triggered a passive barrier of me needing to think about what he was talking about, search for it, and then decide what to reply to. The lack of the attached article is the passive barrier, and our most common response to barriers is to do nothing.

Passive Barriers on Your Desk

A friend of mine lost over $3000 because he didn't cash a check from his workplace, which went bankrupt a few months later. When I asked him why he didn't cash the check immediately, he looked at me and said, “I didn't have an envelope handy.” What other things do you delay because it's not convenient?

Passive Barriers to Exercise

I think back to when I've failed to hit my workout goals, and it's often the simplest of reasons. One of the most obvious barriers was my workout clothes. I had one pair of running pants, and after each workout, I would throw it in my laundry basket. When I woke up the next morning, the first thing I would think is: “Oh god, I have to get up, claw through my dirty clothes, and wear those sweaty pants again.”

Once I identified this, I bought a second pair of workout clothes and left them by my door each day. When I woke up, I knew I could walk out of my room, find the fully prepared workout bag and clothes, and get going.

Passive Barriers to Healthy Eating

Too many people create passive barriers to healthy eating. You're sitting at your desk at work and you get hungry. Rather than reach for a healthy snack (because you don't have one with you — a passive barrier), you go to the vending machine for a bag of Cheetos.

Here's a real-life example of passive barriers preventing J.D. from eating healthy. We were in Denver together in 2013 for a conference. During a long day with no breaks, he didn't have a healthy snack with him. But he did have Hostess Sno-Balls. Bad J.D. That's not even food.

J.D. needs to remove passive barriers to healthy eating

If you find yourself snacking on Cheetos (or Sno-Balls) all day at work, try this: Don’t take any spare change in your pockets for the vending machine. Even if you leave quarters in your car, that walk to the parking lot is barrier enough not to do it. Give yourself an alternative. Carry a healthy snack with you, like apple slices. Remove the passive barrier to eating healthy.

Applying Passive Barrier Theory to Your Own Life

As we've seen, the lack of having something nearby can have profound influences on your behavior. Imagine seeing a complicated mortgage form with interest rates and calculations on over 100 pages. Sure, you should calculate all of it, but if you don't have a calculator handy, the chances of your actually doing it go down dramatically.

Now, we're going to dig into areas where passive barriers are preventing you from making behavioral change — sometimes without you even knowing it.

Fundamentally, there are two ways to address a passive barrier.

You're missing something, so you add it to achieve your goals. For example, cutting up your fruit as soon as you bring it home from the grocery store, packing your lunches all at once, or re-adding the attachment to a followup email so the recipient doesn't have to look for it again.

Causing an intentional passive barrier by deliberately removing something. You put your credit card in a block of ice in the freezer to prevent overspending. (That's not addressing the cause, but it's immediately stopping the symptom.) Or you put your unhealthiest food on the other side of the house, so you have to walk to them. Or you install software like Freedom to force yourself not to browse Reddit three hours a day.

Personally, here are a few passive barriers I've identified (and removed) for myself: I keep my checkbook by my desk, because for the few bills I receive in the mail, I tend to never mail them in. I keep a gym bag of clothes ready to work out. And I cut up my fruit when I bring it home from the store, because I know I'll get lazy later.

Now let's see how this can work for you. Here's an exercise I'd like you to do:

Get a piece of paper and a pen — or open the note-taking app on your phone.

Identify ten things you would do if you were perfect. Don't censor. Just write what comes to mind. And focus on actions, not outcomes. Examples: “I'd work out four times per week, clean my garage by this Sunday, play with my daughter for 30 minutes each day, and check my spending once per week.”

Now, play the “Five Whys” game: Why aren't you doing each of these things?

Let's play out the last step with the example of exercising regularly. Let's assume I say that I want to exercise three times per week, but I only go twice per month. Let's do the Five Whys:

Why do I excercise only twice per month? Because I'm tired when I get home from work.

Why? Because I get home from work at 6 p.m.

Why? Because I leave late for work, so I have to put in eight hours.

Why? Because I don't wake up in time for my alarm clock.

Why? Hmm…Because when I get in bed, I watch Netflix for a couple of hours.

Here's a possible solution: Put the computer in the kitchen before you go to sleep → sleep earlier → come home from work at an earlier time → feel more rested → work out regularly.

That's a gross oversimplification, but you see what I mean.

Homework: Pick ten areas of your life that you want to improve. Force yourself to understand why you haven't done so already. Don't let yourself cop out: “I just don't want to” isn't the real reason. And once you find out the real reasons you haven't been able to check your spending, or cook dinner, or call your mom, you might be embarrassed at how simple it really was. Don't let that stop you. Passive barriers are valued in their usefulness, not in how difficult they are to identify.

The Bottom Line

Passive barriers are subtle factors that prevent you from changing your behavior. Unlike “active” barriers, passive barriers describe the lack of something, making them more challenging to identify. But once you do, you can immediately take action to change your behavior.

You can apply barriers to prevent yourself from spending money, cook and eat healthier, exercise more, stay in touch with your friends and family, and virtually any other behavior. You can do this with small changes or big ones. The important factor is to take action today.

A caveat: Sometimes people take this advice to mean, “The reason I haven't been sticking to my workout regimen is that I don't have the best running shoes. I should really go buy those $150 shoes I've been eyeing…that will help me change my behavior.”

Resolving passive barriers is not a silver bullet: Although they help, you'll be ultimately responsible for changing your own behavior. Instead of buying better shoes immediately, I'd recommend setting a concrete goal — “Once I run consistently for 20 days in a row, I'll buy those shoes for myself” — before spending on barriers. Most changes can be done with a minimum of expense.

J.D.'s note: This is one of my favorite guest articles in the history of Get Rich Slowly. It had a profound effect on me, my life, and my work. This piece was originally published on 17 March 2009. I'm reprinting it today to celebrate the newly-published second edition of Ramit's book, I Will Teach You to Be Rich [my review].

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[presta-hero]

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Besides, the particular accuracy of such units and your reactions about using them are still available to question. Therefore , feel free to talk about any disputable issues with our own managers, although our internet writers will be anticipating you to put your buy. Will medicine switch healthy form of life? It truly is unacceptable caused by several causes.

Oftentimes they start up realizing the importance of health when they already have critical problems, in the next too late… However , there are ways that may help us to forestall and avoid quite a few health problems. The habit of smoking to boundless amount of meals are extremely detrimental. A further bad behavior is binge eating or a practice to overeat.

Read very carefully, and I desire you will get very useful of this essay or dissertation on health and wellness. Why is it so? You may assume that each of our writers basically use checking out software, you easily might download within your.

Secondly, each of our writing organization always offers you professional help support to consumers . Classic variations will be to attend the cinema, currently have dinner in a restaurant or maybe have a walk in the street and you|stroll through the keep. Our health and wellbeing directly depends on active (or passive) lifestyle, on nutritious (or unhealthy) nutrition, which is the main element of the health, splendor and condition.

Hence in this wholesome lifestyle essay or dissertation we are going to tell you what those ways will be. Unfortunately, in these modern times many people usually do not take care of their very own health. They just do not function as really are a must.

This tendency has to put you on your guard, and even scientists along with psychologists existing several reasons for that. Real presence on the person you’re keen on is the most thing in a connection; and unable to meet this natural demand, you will blog post probably turn out single. Besides, during face to face meetings we can make our motions involved along with read the feeling of our loved one relying on his particular mimics. Good lifestyle is moderate plus rational nutritional.

These software will be able to detect merely common problems, while in academics works you might want to operate together with specific provisions and syntactic structures. Objective produce heavy books on reading readers’ real inner thoughts by observing their motion, but this can be the art dangereux for those who choose chatting on the internet. Our job is to aid our charming body to manage all these harmful factors.

All we start to use is not to stay in the way of our system letting it make use of protection things given by nature. When you are in contact with you other half, we are sharing physical appearance. Not waste food fills the guts (that is why people that eat a great deal often are afflicted with constipation).

Big amount of food items do not let our digestive system work in normal way. Another crucial point is that suggests the internet we not always can easily properly identify other people’s sentiments. It happens to be clear in which smoking together with alcohol abuse are usually compatible with nutritious lifestyle.

The most important thing you should consider is that online dating site will never be a suitable substitution regarding real-life birthdays. There is no point to discuss at this point their problems, everyone presently knows about this, and also you can easily read more about these types of issues on this website Puressay. com. We should not really worsen the main negative affect that detrimental ecological adjacent has on people.

The truth is that the solutions that character has directed at our body are actually limitless. Really the only reservation personally is that these kinds of chats will have to really be infrequent, supplementary so that you can real occassions. All the internal organs suffer because the deficit with microelements. We all know the amount unfavorable often the ecological position is in great (and in many not so huge but industrial) cities.

But it is not the point. Is it possible to keep strong wellness till outdated age as well as live endurance in a large city? Absolutely yes, it is possible!

Good lifestyle as well as healthy food should help us to. However , the situation is simply not hopeless. Only balanced nutrition can offer optimal growing and development of a child.

You do not have to opt-in and add endless creates to talk to our help team. Replacing these people completely along with online conversations is abnormal in all faveur, including human’s physiology and also psychology. It makes us feel much better, more secure and perhaps happier!

This particular hormone tiffs and eliminates its nasty fellows: emotional stress hormones. This indicates that once you can make contact with our executives to discuss whatever aspects you do not comprehend.

According to the data files of Community Health Lending broker the length of a person life plus the state of health in 60% are defined by the lifestyle as well as system of nutritional, 15% can be heredity, as well as another 15% is ecology and the environmental conditions, and only 10% may be the health having services. Online chats quite regularly replace face to face appointments as mates prefer to talk without abandoning their apartment rentals.

Although really advanced technology has learnt right now how to move touches in excess of countries along with oceans, it will be still not similar. The civilized environment gradually pertains to understanding that medicine deals with a really small area of human well being, despite the fact that health care technical tools constantly occurs.

Many of us have the in order to live for a minimum of the people right from Caucasus, who’re famous by just their rather long lifetime, or perhaps the citizens associated with rural locations. PurEssay understands that posting model works is better way to set up a connection with consumers: when you have as a minimum general comprehension of what our organization does, you stumble upon it much better to decide whether you want to help with us not really. I do not need to good conservative.

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The paradox is that any person eats so much food, but nonetheless there is debts of the most critical elements in your body. That is why many individuals with extra weight have harmful organs. Individuals who are fond of serious tourism may even engage in skydiving at all their date!

An excellent it comes to online dating services, we realize that it is restrained only to chitchats, sometimes to help online games. These are the main issues that do not really let the body implement it has the main operate, to survive and keep the health as well as ability for work within the most damaging ecological circumstances. Overeating can be not appropriate for healthy form of life.

Keep reading to discover what you will comes from cooperation with us, and then below share with you all of our sample homework on the issue of on the net relationships. We direct sedentary variety of life. You lose a lot of opportunities by interacting with your partner on the internet.

What do we lead to saying ‘Healthy style of life’? First of all, nutritious style of life means refusal from damaging habits. In case you have definitely not heard of almost any breakthroughs in such a field, Allow me to fill everyone in: professionals invented a good kissing equipment, which can post the moves of your is usually a to your valentine via the online world. Human voice conveys way more information as compared to tiny dark-colored letters.

People are too depending on personal make contact with to give upward for modern-day devices. You will find there’s huge number of automobiles and open transport, major number of alternative enterprises as well as dense citizenry per every square kilometer. But in reality the choice of activity is completely nearly your visualization.

However , at this point we handle the actual physical presence of the machine, not just a real guy. Body system start to sense lack of factors needed for the normal accomplishing, metabolisms upsets. Primary, we emphasise that essay written by our company are free involving grammatical goof ups and misprints . We should in addition keep in mind that real bodily interaction gives versatile routines for couples.

Actual physical closeness is really important for evoking physiological typical reactions in our body system.

The post Here You will get English Coursework Examples No cost appeared first on Presta Hero.

[blissfulaims-blog1]

New Advice On Common-sense Products In Iso Xp Probiotic Protein

The Challenges Today For Speedy Systems For Grass Fed Organic Whey Canada

"Firstly, it's important to identify your training goal and need for protein as a supplement Whey Protein in the first place. Different goals will call for different ingredient requirements," Clark said. "Also, if you suffer from any food allergies or intolerance, that will determine what protein powder you should choose, as well." If you don't have any food intolerances, Dennaoui recommends a "multidimensional" protein powder. "However, if that is not the case, an economical way to go about choosing a protein powder would be to look for a multidimensional brand that contains fast and slow digesting proteins. That way you keep your blood sugar levels stable and avoid binge eating, increase nutrient absorption from food and avoid unnecessary storage of fat." Your diet should be the first place to get protein, while powders should always supplement. 2. Take time to research the brand and product When choosing a particular brand, it's important to take the time to compare ingredients, nutrition information and claims, as well as research the credibility of the company and to not let hype influence your decision. "It's also important to recognise that supplement manufacturers are notorious for hyping up their products with unrealistic claims and promises," Clark said. "Don't buy into the hype of major companies that price their product well above what you really need to pay because you can probably gain the same benefits from a cheaper protein powder." In Clark's opinion, the quality of the protein supplement is more important than the total quantity you consume. When in doubt, think of the old saying 'you get what you pay for'. "Always look at the label when deciding on a protein powder and make sure it doesn't contain any more than 7-10 ingredients and try and find a powder with more natural ingredients," Clark told HuffPost Australia. "If you can't pronounce all the ingredient names, it might serve your best interest to look for another one." Another easy way to spot a poor or cheap protein powder is to look at its price.

For the original version including any supplementary images or video, visit https://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/2016/09/12/your-ultimate-guide-to-choosing-the-best-protein-powder_a_21469917/

Use These Tips To Help You Get Fit

You do not have to spend your life in a gym in order to achieve physical fitness. This article provides helpful tips on how you can get fit in many ways, at the gym or at home. Walking is a good way to boost fitness. Walk heel to toe by pushing off with your heel first and your toes last, to increase the effort being put out by your calves. Work your arms as well, by bending the elbows and swinging your arms with each step you take. Setting goals and deadlines for your workout program can serve as a very effective motivator. It helps you to keep focus on obstacles as opposed to losing your motivation due to their difficulty. If you have goals in mind, you're also less likely to quit, as you'll want to see through the things you've started. Exercise when watching television so you always have weight loss momentum. Work out when there is a commercial break. Keep a set of 3lb weights beside your chair to do a little weight training as you like. You will always find some amount of time to squeeze a workout in, no matter how busy you are. Track everything you do throughout each day. Everything from the exercises you complete, to the foods you eat, need to be written down. You can even note the day's weather. You will see what you need to improve on. If you had to put off exercising a little while, note why. Always check your shoes when you go out to exercise and ensure that they are ideal for the conditions. When you are not wearing the proper footwear you can injure your back, legs, and feet. Also, your feet may be sore or cramped after exercising, which can lead to discouragement from continuing your workouts. When you are lifting weights, it is best do many reps of lighter weight as opposed to packing on as much weight as possible and doing fewer reps. Muscle mass involves length of endurance without the loss of strength rather that how much you can lift. This is a very popular technique among many professionals. Try flexing your glutes when you raise weights above your body. This gives the buttocks a great workout in addition to reducing the risk of hurting yourself by being in a bad position. You can help your posture and spine in the process as well. You can improve your volleyball game by focusing on contact skills. The easiest way to do this is to play foosball. Foosball requires a high level of hand-eye coordination to beat the opponent. Practicing and improving your hand-eye coordination skills by playing Foosball will not only make you a better Foosball player, but the same skills will improve your volleyball game as well. The density of your workouts should increase in order to quickly lose weight. More exercises performed in a shorter time frame can increase your weight loss. Shortening the breaks between exercise intervals or removing them entirely will result in "denser" exercises. You'll soon see improved results if you do this. Increase the speed and length of your stride if you want to improve your sprint. Be sure that your foot lands firmly under your body rather than to the front. Use your back leg and toes to push forward and increase your speed. Your sprinting speed will slowly start to increase as you master this technique. A fit lifestyle might feel challenging, but it is also quite enjoyable. Incorporate the tips from this article into your current fitness program. Fitness should be viewed as something that will require effort every day. If you exercise more, you will be making leaps towards your weight loss.

Investigating Picking Out Elements For Canada

Published Saturday, April 14, 2018 9:49PM EDT On Saturday, Syrians in 10 Canadian cities rolled up their sleeves to donate blood. “We need to save lives,” donor Adel Ghanam said from Calgary. His wife, Hiyam Janduda, added that donating blood is a way of saying thanks to the country that has helped so many people start new lives. The coordinated effort, which included cities from Halifax to Vancouver, has been declared “ Syrian Canadian Donation Day ” by the Ottawa-based non-profit Humans for Peace Institution, which also hopes to make this an annual event. Donating blood, one organizer explained, is considered a significant symbolic gesture across much of the Middle East. “When people want to really assure you that they are going to do whatever they can for you, they always say, ‘I’m going to sacrifice my blood for you,’” said Sam Nammoura, a Syrian-Canadian who co-founded Calgary’s Syrian Refugee Support Group . “To give blood is to give life,” Syrian refugee Mohammed Alsaleh, who helped organize Vancouver’s blood drive, added. “And we want to give life to Canada that gave us life.” Canadian Blood Services spokesperson Lisa Castro says the group is grateful for the Syrian community’s support. “The demand for blood is constant,” Castro said. “And it’s used for ongoing treatment such as cancer patients, car accident victims, leukemia patients, heart surgeries (and) things like that.” But while Saturday’s blood drive was seen as a way of giving back to the country that has taken them in, many Syrian-Canadians also had their minds on the ongoing bloodshed back home as well the recent U.S.-led airstrikes that targeted Syria’s chemical weapons facilities. “I am so angry because of the lack of vision when it comes to the way that the American administration is handling their response to Syria,” said Alsaleh from Vancouver. He believes the airstrikes send a troubling mixed message. “You cannot use chemical weapons against Syrian children, but you can use conventional weapons,” Alsaleh said.

For the original version including any supplementary images or video, visit https://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/syrian-refugees-in-10-cities-donate-blood-to-show-thanks-to-canada-1.3885665

Want To Know More About Vitamins And Minerals? Stop And Read These Tips!

Are you confused about how to improve your health? Do you feel less-than-ideal but are unsure of how to improve? You are about to read over some excellent advice concerning supplementing your diet with the right nutrients and vitamins. Make certain you are getting enough vitamins to allow your body to recover from working out. Including vitamin and mineral supplements to your diet not only allows for fast recover time, but also provides the nourishment needed by your body to burn fat and build muscle. Vitamins and minerals need to be synthesized if your body wants to use them, so you need to know about any potential reactions. For example, calcium can make it harder for your body to absorb iron. When you take an iron supplement, you should avoid calcium supplements, antacids, and dairy products for half an hour before or after. The first step to proper nutrition is eating a balanced, healthy, whole foods diet. Get five to seven servings of produce each day. Also, get some protein. If your diet does not provide the right amount of nutrients, consider taking supplements to improve your health. If you take a supplement that contains fat, they are taken with food. Take them at mealtimes. Several vitamins, including E, K, and A are best absorbed by your body when taken with a meal. You are able to get the most from them when you take them with food. that contains fat. Milk and sun exposure are great vitamin D sources. If you do not drink milk or spend time outdoors, you may need to take a vitamin D supplement. Your bones stay strong when your body gets Vitamin D. A lot of us have body aches but don't know why we do. A good supplement might be the answer. Fish oil and Vitamin E can help your muscles by softening them during times when they are strained or tight. Taking minerals and vitamins is an affordable way to make your life healthier. The addition of vitamins to an already healthy diet maximizes health for less money than a visit to a physician. Many fruits and vegetables are rich with Vitamin C, but citrus fruits are abundant with it. These supplements are for those that cannot get the daily recommended amounts with just food. This vitamin prevents colds, acne, gum disease and other conditions. There have been studies that show increased amounts can benefit those with ADHD, Alzheimer's, and dementia. Talk to your doctor to be tested for vitamin deficiencies. This will help you to nip any problem in the bud. People without lots of money to spend often settle for unhealthy fast food. Make sure to buy a good multivitamin or supplements that will let your body fight disease and turn the fat to energy. Are you feeling sick and hopeless? Luckily, the information here can help you with vitamins and minerals. While they may not directly apply to your condition, begin with this valuable knowledge and research until you are able to find what you do need. Good luck moving forward!

[prostatecancerlancer-blog]

Vitamins to condition the chest shortly prostate cancer before and after mammography or cancer

Food companies within the plants begin with a wonderful and modern system. This is the plan "wonderful" food, which is confusing to Americans. Which is better? It is good Robb Wolf Paleo Diet is a transmission command! For 11 years in order to work with doctors and nutrients, providing easy access to drugs, I take that job. Good optimal dose our concerns meal planning exercise, nutrition and care program application and maintenance builds our tissues. This is the definition of food: how to buy and repair of body tissues! Our time is bad for meals, not on earth, fertilizers, pesticides and other aspects. (If necessary, yet it reported having more content of special materials of Bernard Jensen and Mark Anderson Collections of e-books). In this context, it is also necessary to address the increasing feeling that our diets, dietary supplements, on the international scene, having to make physical changes and restore issues physiological methods fun. As a result, some health and fitness actually repair work with different organic or homeopathic supplements are made. Unfortunately, as simple nutritional drug, I want to give me that without a large number of scholarships for nursing a bad diet! Within the formation of digestive support begins new large menu. My neck, using the services of the reaction of the known nutrients proven to decide what type of supplements are the needs of Food each affected individual. Production probably the best person plan fair value for the money supply and accept the characters at any time. maternal health, in particular, the need to be affected in the sense of a number of factors for each provider capacity views as the current address or the back of the healthy breast tissue for thought. (Be careful with this factor content is not in the published professional alternative traditional medical care, it is only a recommendation, a healthy body for the rapid control of classical professional medical care for the health of the mother and efficiency in the management of related support my report here. Yesterday). Nutrient Support chest exercises advertising? Perfect, of course - most of the reality of the study to the truth of the matter. We are a list of products to meet the opportunities, it is done, and now produce better healthy "mom" ... everyone loves lists! 1. Food background and vegetables. Several courses, the area is new, better vitamins and places category. Also the darker the fruit or vegetable, the better, especially because they are much more concentrated vitamins. 2. Try liver detoxification food manufacturer, cruciferous vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts), garlic, horseradish and onions to eat. Control of the human species as a result of my stinking'll try to remember that stinking explanations types! 3. include things like optimistic fat in the diet, such as (H2O tuna, salmon, mackerel), green leafy vegetables, beef and other grass-fed animals with natural acids significant amounts of cold fish omega-3 fatty additional funds in their tissues. Please send me the page identify the modern client is healthy, the perfect home raised animals. 4. include things like kitchen spices of different cuisines food. Curry, paprika, garlic, onion and simply decide to start. Turmeric to do, for example, advertising and marketing possibilities exclusive sports! (Inner Truth is short article, if these seven days will be filled with turmeric ... There is something very surprising). 5. Make sure that the things that fermented foods in your diet includes only sauerkraut, kimchi, or kefir. This helps maintain a prostate cancer intestinal flora feet. Try to remember. For food to cook, or the quality of the fermentation process is false When you begin to ferment their individual foods, Wild Fermentation by Sandor Katz e-book excellent for training on their own, so charming against miter on many things! 6. Consume h2o ... very cool, filtered H2O. The common advice is 50 oz total fat content of H2O a day of work. So if you weigh 132 weight, I have to have at least 66 liters of water per business day. Security ... Food companies to the prostate cancer of the mother and efficiency begins with a refreshing diet. There are many elements to this dilemma support healthy breast tissue. Tomorrow I will do so with respect to the direction of energy to sustain and continue talking in the chest wine packaging.

[soovaryit]

I have been RAGING at my body as of late. As I’m sure other chronic pain and illness suffers will understand, I dramatically switch between the inner monologues of ‘I love my body! I’m going to be kind to it and fill it with nutrition and goodness!!’ to ‘I want to forget that I have a body, eat junk food and be drunk 99% of the time’.

This is all tied up in mental health and pain levels of course, but it can often be a reaction to the way in which others treat your pain. I’d love to pretend I’m positive and level-headed enough to not let peoples actions affect my personal outlook but nope. I’m a human being and a fragile one at that and every negative interaction I have around my illness feeds into a negative view of myself. Shout out to my therapist for that line, thanks Lyndz. Today I want to vent about common misperceptions and assumptions around endometriosis and chronic pain in general because they fuck me off and I’d rather address a general audience than have to explain this to individuals that I encounter. Maybe I should just walk around wearing a t-shirt with these on. It would have to be a very big t-shirt. Anyway.

First up – let’s tackle the big one. That endometriosis is a ‘women’s problem’. Problematic on several levels. First of all, endo affects 1/10 people with a reproductive system. This does not mean that they identify as female. They could be trans, non-binary and/or not use she/her pronouns. It’s exclusionary to adopt this kind of universal female rhetoric around the disease. I am guilty of this too but it would be nice to see a shift in the gendered language around endo that doesn’t exclude anyone who isn’t cis or female-identifying. The second way it is problematic is that society doesn’t care about ‘women’s’ issues. The more it is labelled as such the less it is thought of as a HUMAN disease that affects HUMANS. Please, lets start making this a human issue. Yes, it’s ‘taboo’ because it’s about periods and ovaries and all those yucky things that even modern medicine doesn’t want to acknowledge. But imagine if this wasn’t a gendered disease. I can guarantee you there would be extensive research and treatment on a condition that can glue your organs to one another and leave you with trapped internal bleeding and scars all over the inside and outside of your body. Not to mention ruin your mental health and fertility. Which brings me to…

All endometriosis sufferers want babies and that is their number one concern in the world! Who cares about your health and sanity when our sole purpose is to breed!! (I really hope you’re getting my sarcasm here).  It is an undisputed fact that during your journey with endo, (generally male) doctors will comment on your ability to have children without asking. This has even made me, a person who would like children, uncomfortable as it’s often information given to you based on the fact that you have the capability to produce a child, never mind if you have asked about fertility or stated that you want children. It is an irritating assumption that many doctors will offer you as a ‘cure’ when it absolutely isn’t. It’s misinformed, misogynistic bullshit that could be ended by the simple question of ‘are you concerned about your fertility?’ before launching into said bullshit. It also prevents doctors from performing hysterectomies to younger women as there is a ludicrous assumption that they will change their mind later in life and thus any agency around their body is taken away based on one doctor's opinion. I'm sure this is different country to country but in the NHS it is notoriously difficult. I was left with very little information after my lap other than ‘it hasn’t affected your fertility’. Yay for me but will there be any less pain? Who knows! Better crack on and get myself pregnant with my non-existent partner and stop hassling poor doctors over my quality of life. *

Number three is my fave go-to criticism from ‘healthy/able-bodied’ people (I find both of those words irritating but never know what else to say). That raising awareness for chronic pain is attention seeking or asking for a pity party. I think I am safe in saying that literally no one with a disability of any kind wants your pity. I can only speak for myself here but phrases like ‘you poor thing’ and ‘how do you cope?’ ignite a certain fury in me, especially when accompanied by a head tilt and simpering voice. It makes me feel pathetic. It makes me feel like you think I am pathetic, which could not be further from the truth. When I write blogs and share photos of my experiences with pain it is because I want to show people the reality of it. I want to end the misconception that any of my conditions are something to be hidden or ashamed of because that is how society keeps chronically ill people down. I want you to recognise the strength that it takes to live with pain every day and I want you to feel the frustration that suffers feel when they are not taken seriously or believed. Is it attention seeking? Yes. I want everyone’s attention when I explain how overlooked endometriosis and chronic pain are and how medicine is steeped in gender inequality and a disregard for complicated conditions. So there.

And I’ll finish with.. you’re just a hypochondriac! Okay let’s go there. In what world would any human being relish the idea of going to doctors and hospital appointments that cost them money and valuable time, only for their time to usually be wasted by medical professionals that don’t understand or have much of an interest in helping you?** Why would ANYONE want to spend their lives in bed feeling isolated and alone and depressed and waiting to feel well again when they’re not sure they will ever feel well again? Why would I want to spend my time making up pain and illnesses when I could, ooh I don’t know, be making the most of the degree I’m paying £51,000+ for? Or doing normal 25-year-old things like enjoying dating, going on holidays, working? Everything I do has to be a careful calculation of how bad I will feel after and it is exhausting. Some days I don’t want to step foot in my bedroom because it reminds me of miserable, seemingly never-ending bouts of pain and depression/anxiety. I would like to be a ‘healthy person’, whatever is that is but I will loudly shout about every condition that holds me back because we live in a world that doesn’t value people with long-term health problems. So I hope I have got your attention, but I don’t want your sympathy. I want your empathy and understanding. And honestly, I hope people do feel an element of discomfort when they read posts like this because chronic illness sufferers sure as hell don’t feel comfortable ourselves and I am happy for the world to know about it. Now a couple of disclaimers bcos that was a big ol’ rant and some things need to be made clear.

*Did not want this rant to discount the horrendous struggles of infertility because that is an unimaginably awful thing for people to go through and solidarity with you <3 

**There are also lovely, lovely caring medical professionals in the sea of incompetent ones like my doctor who is aptly named Dr.Peacock because he is a beautiful, understanding creature and please keep trying until you find one, you will find one.