#trust issues! betrayal! interesting positions!

[schnaf]

22 days until hyeongjun's 22nd birthday

day 18 - you don't understand me

[alleyskywalker]

Really controversial opinion here, but I think it would actually be really interesting and on-theme if Armand hadn't lied about anything significant other than what we have canon confirmation of him lying about (i.e. the extent of his involvement in the trial, that he lied to Louis about breaking with the coven). Not Louis asking him to erase the SF memories, not the Stein photos (which I don't think he lied about anyway). And not because I'm this huge Armand defender (even though, sure, I do have a more positive view on him that most of the fandom, I guess), but because I think it would fit nicely into those themes of "am I the history I endured?"/"are we the sum of our worst moments?" on both an in-universe and meta level.

Like, have it be kind of a crying wolf situation, where Armand had lied before, and in such a significant and harmful way that it has created this massive breach of trust, both in his relationship with Louis and in the "relationship" with the audience. Now, everything Armand says and does is suspect because the betrayal was so massive, the breach of trust so fundamental. We don't actually have proof of Armand lying about anything else, even the SF memories situation, on close examination, why would he do it? what were his motives to erase those memories specifically and not others, like the entire interview with Daniel? But everyone automatically accepts he's lying because...well he lied in such a big way before, right? And I think their argument in 2x4 is there not because Armand actually messed with the photos, but because it's an illustration of the root of dysfunction in their relationship - it all goes back to that betrayal. Armand says, clearly exhausted and frustrated, "you just assume it was me." And he's not wrong - why would you immediately jump to that accusation of your partner unless the two of you had trust issues?

And you know, again, I'm not saying that this is true. I'm just saying it would be interesting to me if it was because it would be another twist and take on that theme of...how does the past affect us? How does past trauma and past actions (our own and of those around us) change our view of the world, ourselves and others? What happens when we are judged by our worst moments? Can we ever escape the history we have endured (or created)?

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Would you mind talking more about Ghost? I dig your interpretation on him so i'm curious if you'd share your thoughts; since i know how COD in general writes these characters and we know romance isn't on the table for them, ESP for someone like Ghost (even confimred by his voice actor too!)

So all that aside, in your opinion, what would it take to win Ghost's heart (or well, Simon's)? :)

It's great to hear you like my interpretation of Ghost! I'll gladly share my thoughts on this, the supposed love life of Simon Riley is one of my favorite subjects 🧐

Thoughts on what would it take to win Simon's heart under the cut ->

To be honest I see it highly unlikely that Ghost would date. I think Samuel Roukin's opinion on this matter was spot on. Simon's traumatic background, trust issues, the need to stay anonymous and his profession as a special ops soldier is just too heavy a combo. His family's murder and multiple betrayals have pushed him on a path of extreme independence and made him evade any kind of attachment.

That being said... I'm a hopeless romantic and love to imagine scenarios just like every other little simp here 🩷💋, and I've pictured (and occasionally written) him to be drawn to someone who is principally the opposite of himself, but who also has a dash of angst in their heart and firsthand experience or at least some basic understanding of complex trauma.

A positive vibes only/sunshine type of person would not resonate well with his darkness, and a carefree joker would only annoy him. Then again, there's Soap – but the thing with John MacTavish is that he shares the same profession and in that way, is not a stranger to the Underworld. Their banter is also evidence enough that Soap is not afraid of Ghost's madness and even looks up to him – actually a perfect way to make someone like Ghost enjoy your company. This man has a terrible praise kink but he can't stand spineless bootlickers. So the adoration should happen in a "I trust you and would follow you to hell & back" kind of way.

However, due to the shit he's been through, I'd say (contrary to popular headcanon, I dunno?) that Simon would likely fall for someone outside the military world. First of all, he's very uncomfortable with the fact that his partner has to fear for his safety. But the fear of losing his partner to the dangers of this profession would be a little too much. It would only trigger a shitload of PTSD stuff. The fear of losing a loved one again would override the mutual experience and bonding through warfare, all the elements which otherwise might be pull factors in a military love interest. On the other hand, people with traumatic backgrounds tend to repeat the pattern, no matter how horrific or unsafe, simply because it's familiar. Still, I'd say someone from the base personnel would be a more alluring option for him. The shared hell, so to say, could make the foundations of this relationship quite dark. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing!

Deep down, Simon would be attracted to softness. Not innocence, per se, just something different from the realm in which he operates. This is why I think he could definitely fall for "a normie". He would appreciate dark humor and a certain kind of fearlessness, however. What ultimately would win his heart is someone who can stand, even cherish, his melancholy and cynicism and life choices and who is not on a quest to change or "fix" him.

I think Simon's ultimate wish is to find a home because he has lost it (or hasn't really had one in the first place). He's a leader and has to provide safety and support on a daily basis to the people under his command. But who offers support and safety to him? He knows how to protect people but doesn't know how to create a safe space, so he would appreciate someone who makes him feel he's finally found his way home. I think he yearns for a small measure of peace and a slice of normal life to wash away the adrenaline and blood and filth, he wants a small corner free from the demons that haunt him, even if he would reluctantly (if ever) admit that he does.

[coffeegnomee]

Also it's so interesting how when Kab understands *why* Mane killed her she is 100% okay with the kill and I can't help but suspect that that would be true about every single death she's gotten. But she's never gotten the reason so she doesn't understand why and then just thinks people are cruel and evil.

But mane killing her "because I betrayed his trust" still feels like a wild sentence for her to say especially since it was the most tenuous trusts ever - literally spying together and them him just *asking* her to get zam and bacon killed. How does she not see she was in the right for protecting her teammate and that it was not at all a betrayal of mane's trust, he's the enemy! He was planning on killing her teammate!

But she also doesn't count it as a time mane has killed her anymore. Like she 0% holds it against him.

It's almost like unless someone is actively hunting her down they are neutral, and if they're neutral, one singular positive interaction makes them basically allies and going against them is a betrayal of trust...

It's just so weird. I guess it's part of how she views manipulation, like if you can get a foot in the door that person will trust you and if they trust you you can use that to either betray or keep yourself safe. So one positive interaction is really very important to her. And from her experience manipulating to hold actions against the target won't help your positioning in manipulation.

And as we know she keeps any deeper thoughts hidden from chat so it's unclear as to wether she is planning on pulling a blackmail on mane or just hoping to be chill with him in general.

She has once said, and this has rattled around my head since she said it, 10/11/24 KAB: "[mane] doesn't care about the lore shit at all, which is the issue, so i can't blackmail him"

But it will be interesting who betrays whom first. Because it also completely feels like mane is doing this to cook kab. that phase 2 is just manepear gets all his enemies to trust him. or he's just being manepear and being silly. or he's intrigued by this new bunny who no longer runs.

who knows, he's only said weird cryptic quotes. though I can't help wonder if the "if you give a man a fish for one day he eats for a day, if you feed a man two fish he eats for two days, [..] when the betrayer becomes the helper, he eats two fish" was that he is stealing the two fish by being the helper.

we shall have to wait and see i guess.

[abyssalzones]

C-PTSD as a diagnosis makes so much sense for Ford because he really does fit almost all of the criteria, ESPECIALLY if you take the stuff in J3 into account in conjunction with his traumatic childhood (bullying, bad dad, etc.). It just makes sense in regards to his motivations and his issues with interpersonal relationships (like with Stan). Also buring yourself in your work (like he does) is a very common 'flight' coping mechanism to trauma in adults

I'm smiling like this right now

ford's whole.... mental health deal is extremely interesting to examine because Oh my god this man is the textbook image for "reacting to ongoing, continuous trauma". intentional or otherwise (I'm inclined to believe it's both).

like. okay hang on I'm about to get very in depth with it

I feel like there's no way this entire guy's life and in some ways his lasting identity haven't been defined by and constructed around various forms of trauma, maybe the most obvious and true-to-canon-intent being peer abuse/bullying from childhood. a lot of people downplay the impact of this type of abuse but it's... responsible for a lot of social ills in shocking ways. (if you're more interested in this topic here is an article my friend mer linked me a while back, it gets into it very deeply)

(a lot of this is going to be sourced from the wikipedia page for CPTSD [and my own experience Living with it] which I realize isn't very professional of me but Whatever this is tumblr)

one of the core tenets of ford's personality is that he's Different. he owns it, sure- his six fingers become a point of pride rather than something to be ashamed of- but they make it extremely clear that from a young age he associated being different with being a social pariah. ford's generation was characterized by notoriously cruel bullying, and anything that remotely made you stand out rendered you a target. ford could've been bullied for being nerdy and jewish (and failing to perform socially, ie dating) alone, having such an obvious mutation definitely was not winning him any points.

so it's honestly no surprise, when from childhood ford feels like he has One person in the world to trust and confide in, that he would go on to form very unhealthy attachment patterns typical of CPTSD. as you elaborated on regarding AvPD (which I know far less about but seems to have comorbidity with CPTSD): if you're hard-wired to believe socializing with others results in failure or betrayal, then you're not going to make an effort. but what does end up happening is that you're going to pour all of your trust and dependency into one person at a time, one person who is "safe".

previously, that was his brother. and it's not really hard to draw the conclusion from there that fiddleford was a subject of ford's attachment style, considering he was his One friend from college, and... one of Maybe two people ford is friends with at all who he isn't related to. he cites him as the only person he can possibly trust to work on the portal project alongside him, and he still can't bring himself to tell him the full truth, because he's terrified of losing him. I love their dynamic (I do think they were mutual best friends, and there was no small amount of trust reciprocated between them. "fiddleford was weird as hell too" is something I keep coming back to) and I don't think it's built on entirely unhealthy terms, but that kind of pressure is... setting things up to crash and burn.

enter bill stage left. back to "continuous yearning to be liked and accepted"- this guy knew that and made every effort to prey on ford's insecurities to reel him in as close as possible. this is what really pisses me off about the idea that bill was just "inflating ford's ego", because it's way, way more insidious than that. throughout the entirety of journal 3 we see ford reintroduce someone to his life he has a very positive relationship with (fiddleford) and how that trust gets gradually broken down by bill's influence "winning out" over their friendship. I think it's safe to say ford was already vulnerable: from the start, he'd been isolated in his research for six years (and it's unclear for how long he'd known bill by 1982), and bill proved time and time again to be someone who wouldn't judge him, someone who would praise him for his hard work, and perhaps most critically, make him feel like being different was something special.

like that's... that's really not good!!!! and that kind of thing works wonders on someone who has already settled with the idea that they're inclined to be alone just by design.

trying to put a cap on this. in relationships like the one he's had with his brother or fiddleford it doesn't even necessarily have to be ""toxic"" (vague term anyway) or outwardly bad to be built on unhealthy attachment patterns, and considering for a good chunk of ford's life his attachment to others can be characterized as "I can only trust ONE person at a time" it feels essential to any discussion of his CPTSD or canon trust issues. That is something that happens a lot in Real cases of CPTSD (hi) and only further snowballs into More trauma by leaving you vulnerable to manipulation and abuse (see: bill.)

I've been going on for way too long now and I feel like I've only scratched the surface of the thing I wanted to elaborate on sorry. that post traumatic stress disorder can complex

[darligvane]

Gage headcanons

I have these all written down in a google doc (plus way more) so I figured I might as well throw some here now that I'm getting more comfortable using tumblr lol. I'm very open to discussion about these! I might post more in the future if someone finds it interesting.

CW for: Minor mentions of addiction and some general trauma stuff. Nothing too bad I don't think but don't hold me to that.

A lot of these mention The Harvester by the way, sorry. Lore makes my brain itch.

● While he is a part of a minority of raiders who can actually read and write‐ (as evidenced by him leaving messages to Colter on his terminal) -he is dyslexic. It takes him a while to write things out coherently, and reading anything more than a few short sentences is often frustrating.

● ^ because of this, he prefers / genuinely enjoys comic books. They're light on reading and he can usually tell whats going on even without dialogue. He had a small collection of comic books back when he lived with The Harvester, and still gets kind of pissed he never got those back.

• Regarding comics, his least favorite character is the Silver Shroud. He just pisses him off.

● His eyepatch being so large is actually functional! (Somewhat) I like to think he lost his eye by getting shot in the face with a plasma round, which corroded and destroyed a large area of skin around his eye and down his cheek. So the large metal plating on his eyepatch covers the large scar.

● He actually lost his eye when he first joined The Harvesters gang when he was younger. One of Harvests gang members pulled the trigger on him when he initially approached them, thinking he had ill intentions. It sucked- but hey, at least they let him in.

● He made his own cage armor and designed it particularly around his needs rather than protection. He uses the cage to hold tools, parts, a rag, etc. while he works on things like Colters power armor or other mechanical things he fiddled with. Definitely doesn't make him very bulletproof, but following the boss around keeps him away from most combat situations anyway.

● Colter had a tendency to use Gages armor like a big handle to drag him around a lot, which he didn't particularly enjoy.

● His favorite colour is yellow, which is why his cage armor is the colour it is. He painted it himself :')

● Has the most horrific trust issues in all of mankind. (Thanks for betraying him Harvest, he will absolutely not recover from that.) He won't eat anything he doesn't see prepared himself, won't set down his drink unless he's alone, he can't sleep around other people, etc. When Colter dies and the new Overboss takes over, he doesn't even tell them where he sleeps until he trusts them entirely. He'll just dissappear at night unless you call out for him.

● These trust issues leak into his behaviors during relationships also. Down to the more simple things. He prefers to hug his partner from behind or be big spoon, he prepares food for them both, takes the night guard when camping, etc. Anything that puts him in the more advantageous position, even if its subconscious.

● The Harvester haunts him. He still sees and hears him in the shadows or corners after however many years its been. Has nightmares of him coming back and finally finishing the job, killing him. Feels the cold metal of a scythe against his throat when it isn't there... its endless. Even something as common as the sounds of distant gunfire make him paranoid, since it reminds him of the betrayal. Absolutely ruined him.

● Has tattoos inspired by / centered around The Harvesters. Covers them with his armor though. Hes got some trauma to unpack man, idk. (Should I do a tattoo tour for him?)

● One of the reasons he hates chems is from a previous addiction. He doesn't like to talk about it, but he made a few of his worst life decisions on chems and it just put a bad taste in his mouth. He'd prefer it if his Overboss / partner was in a rational state of mind, thank you.

● He is surprisingly good with animals for the most part. Particularly cats. Does the old man / dad thing where he says he doesn't like them or calls them mean names while secretly petting them or letting them hop in his lap when he's alone.

● Not usually a big fan of the more "exotic" wasteland animals though. Totally got jumpy one day and shot a Pack molerat on accident.

Thats probably enough for now. I'm happy to answer questions or expand on these more if asked, and I'll probably share more in the future. (Maybe some 18+ ones too? We'll see.)

[jackiequick]

Bravery in Her Blood | April Merlyn♡

-> Face Claim: Grace Phipps

Name: April Roberta Merlyn-Queen

Aliases/Nicknames: Ally, Robbie, Goldie, Sparrow

Age: 8-22 years old (age depending on appearance)

Height: 5'2

Birthday: March 20

Zodiac Sign: Pisces  

Family:

Biological Father: Tommy Merlyn

Biological Mother: Isla Mendes

Uncle/Adoptive Father Figure: Oliver Queen

Aunt/Mother Figure: Dinah Laurel Lance

Aunt: Thea Queen

Uncle: John Diggle

Biological Grandfather: Malcolm Merlyn

Grandmother: Moira Queen

Grandfather: Robert Queen

Background:

April Roberta Merlyn, known affectionately as "Robbie" or "Goldie," was born into a complex family with connections to both the Merlyn and Queen families. Her childhood was marked by the dynamic relationships within her family, including her close bond with her biological father, Tommy Merlyn, and her adoptive father figure, Oliver Queen.

Raised primarily by Tommy, April grew up as a daddy's girl, cherishing her time with him and viewing him as the best father figure in her eyes. Her relationship with her Aunt Laurel also played a significant role in her upbringing, with Laurel serving as a maternal figure and role model for April.

Despite the challenges and turmoil within her family, April developed a protective streak, often finding herself entangled in their struggles and challenges. Her loyalty to her family was unwavering, even as she grappled with her own fears and vulnerabilities.

———————————

Personality:

April Roberta Merlyn is a dynamic and multifaceted individual. She is ambitious and determined, always striving to achieve her goals and make her mark on the world. Her wit and charisma make her a natural at connecting with others, and her courage and compassion shine through in her interactions. 

April is also creative and imaginative, often using her talents in writing and photography to express herself and capture the beauty of the world around her. Her loyalty and kindness are unwavering, making her a reliable and supportive friend.

Despite her positive attributes, April has her struggles. She can sometimes be lazy and unmotivated, preferring the comfort of her own world to facing challenges head-on. Darkened by revenge for what happened to her father and hatred towards her grandfather. Trust issues and feelings of hopelessness occasionally cloud her judgment, leading to moments of jealousy and rash decisions. 

However, her faithfulness and respect for others usually guide her back on track. April's journey is one of growth and self-discovery, as she learns to balance her strengths and weaknesses while navigating the complexities of her family's legacy and her own aspirations.

Skills and Interests:

April is a talented writer and aspiring copywriter/content writer, with a passion for storytelling and creative expression. She enjoys photography, writing, and occasionally playing the guitar in her free time. In her youth, she created videos using her Barbies, showcasing her early creative instincts.

April also has experience playing baseball and possesses basic combat skills, having learned archery and firearm handling from Oliver, Diggle, and Laurel. Despite her initial reluctance to engage in combat, April eventually embraces these skills as a means of self-defense and protection for herself and her loved ones.

Relationships:

While April is single for the most part, she develops occasional crushes on individuals like Dick Grayson, Superboy, and others. Her friendships extend to superheroes like Supergirl, The Flash, Batgirl, The Atom, Starfire, Miss Martian, and Beast Boy, among others, highlighting her ability to form meaningful connections beyond her family.

--------------------------------

Likes:

Writing and storytelling

Photography

Playing the guitar

Making videos using her Barbies (when she was younger)

Baseball

Spending time with her family and friends

Watching comfort movies

Dislikes:

Betrayal and manipulation

Feeling trapped or powerless

Uncertainty and instability

Conflict and violence

Being lied to or deceived

Feeling isolated or alone

Professional Aspirations:

April aspires to become a copywriter or content writer, leveraging her passion for writing and storytelling to pursue a career in creative and strategic communication. She envisions herself using her skills to craft compelling narratives and connect with audiences through impactful and engaging content.

~~~~~~~~~

Strengths:

Ambitious and determined

Charismatic and witty

Courageous and compassionate

Respectful and kind

Creative and imaginative

Faithful and loyal

Weaknesses:

Tendency towards laziness and lack of motivation

Struggles with trust issues and feelings of hopelessness

Prone to bouts of jealousy and rash decision-making

Vulnerable to manipulation and exploitation by others

Difficulty managing intense emotions and conflicts

Can become hateful and switch sides depending on the situation

Challenges & Turmoils:

April has faced numerous challenges and traumas shaped by the tumultuous events surrounding her family's past and their involvement in dangerous conflicts. The custody battle between Oliver and Malcolm placed her in the center of a power struggle, along with issues within the League of Assassins, forcing her to confront her own fears and vulnerabilities.

The death of her father, Tommy Merlyn, in a tragic accident deeply impacted April, leaving her grappling with grief and loss. The traumatic events surrounding her aunt, Thea Queen, further tested April's resilience and fortitude, exposing her to violence and danger that threatened her sense of security and stability.

Despite these challenges, April has demonstrated remarkable strength and resilience, navigating the complexities of her family's legacy and finding her own path amidst the chaos and turmoil. Her journey towards self-discovery and healing promises to be a compelling narrative of growth and redemption.

———————————————————

->Discovery of Oliver's Secret Identity:

One evening, during a lavish party at the Queen mansion, chaos erupted as intruders infiltrated the premises, sending guests fleeing for safety. Amidst the confusion, April found herself separated from her family, lost in the crowd as panic spread throughout the house.

As she sought refuge on an upper floor, April stumbled upon a masked figure clad in green, engaged in a fierce battle with the intruders across the hall. Fear gripped her as she instinctively reached for the nearest objects, hurling them towards the intruder in a desperate attempt to defend herself.

To her surprise, the masked figure approached her with caution, his voice gentle and reassuring as he spoke. April's initial fear gave way to curiosity as the figure revealed himself to be none other than her uncle, Oliver Queen, known to the world as the vigilante Green Arrow.

In disbelief, April questioned Oliver's motives and identity, uncertain of whether to trust him. However, Oliver's gentle demeanor and familiarity with her family's history convinced her of his sincerity.

With a mixture of shock and awe, April watched as Oliver removed his hood, revealing his face beneath the mask. In that moment, the pieces of the puzzle fell into place, and April realized the truth about her uncle's secret identity.

Overwhelmed by the revelation, April struggled to comprehend the implications of Oliver's double life as both her beloved uncle and the masked vigilante who fought to protect their city. However, as Oliver extended his hand in reassurance, April made a silent promise to keep his secret, knowing that their bond as family was stronger than any mask or disguise.

With a newfound sense of understanding and connection, April emerged from the encounter with a deeper appreciation for her uncle's heroism and the sacrifices he made to keep their family safe. As she reunited with her loved ones, April carried with her the weight of Oliver's secret, a silent guardian of the truth amidst the chaos of their tumultuous lives.

—————————————————

Archery and Marksmanship:

April possesses a natural talent for archery, honing her skills with dedication and passion. She first discovered her love for the sport under the guidance of her uncle Oliver, who recognized her potential and encouraged her to pursue marksmanship as a means of self-defense.

Though April also knows how to handle firearms, her favorite weapon of choice is a crossbow. She finds comfort and familiarity in the weapon's design and mechanics, favoring its precision and versatility in combat situations.

Whether at home or at the Arrow Cave, April can often be found practicing her marksmanship with her crossbow, fine-tuning her aim and mastering her technique. She approaches each shot with determination and focus, channeling her passion and conviction into every arrow she looses.

As she grows in skill and confidence, April embraces her aunt Thea's words of wisdom, remembering what she's fighting for with every shot she takes. 

The quote, "If you remember what you're fighting for, you'll never miss your target.”, becomes a mantra for April, guiding her in both her marksmanship and her life's journey as a guardian of justice and defender of her family.

With her unwavering determination and her trusty crossbow in hand, April stands ready to face whatever challenges may come her way, knowing that as long as she keeps her eyes on her target and her heart set on her purpose, she will never miss the mark.

--------------------------------------------

—April Roberta Merlyn is a young woman shaped by the legacy of her family and her own personal trials, continuously growing and discovering her path.

As she navigates the challenges ahead, one thing is certain: her story is far from over, and the future holds endless possibilities for this resilient and determined heroine.

~~~~

That's all folks! Pls let me know what you think Remember to like, comment and share

Tags: @gaminggirlsstuff @missstrawbs2001 @daughter-of-melpomene @t-nd-rfoot @yetanotherwells @rickb-chaos @sherloquestea @gcthvile @ohgodnotagainn @topgun-imagines @superspookyjanelle @xgoddessoffandomsx @cherrysft @lazywolfwiccan

[bestworstcase]

anyway about cinwin and my ongoing losing-the-plot situation: i think it’s really interesting to lay what winter does in v8 against cinder’s whole thing—because winter witnesses the culmination of ironwood’s military coup when he shoots councilman sleet and then glances across the hallway to make eye contact with harriet, only to see her slam down the standard-issue indifferent “what are your orders, sir?” mask, whereupon winter realizes that a) everybody here except her is going to fall in line, and b) she’s stuck in a hospital bed right now and if she speaks out ironwood is just going to shoot her too, which helps no one. and therefore c) it falls to her to get back on her feet as quickly as possible so that she can do what she can to be a guardrail.

every choice she makes after this point is a calculation: what are the general’s orders, what is the right thing to do in this situation, and how can she—to the greatest degree possible—bend the former to meet the latter, until that becomes impossible and she intervenes to protect marrow and get both of them safely into a position to help. which is to say, winter spends the majority of v8 actively undermining ironwood, without him noticing. as he says, he expected betrayal at every turn but never from her.

and of course when they fight in the end it’s, “you closed the borders! you squeezed mantle until it broke!”—her trust and faith in him have been diminishing quite literally since the fall of beacon. likewise in v7, when winter is alone with people she trusts (weiss, penny) she is quite open about the fact that she doubts and wrestles with the choices ironwood is making, and it’s clear from what she says that this is very important to her; that—whatever she thinks of herself—winter has never been one to blindly follow orders.

the point being, winter is in fact exactly the kind of person ironwood, on paper, should have been monitoring for any hint of disloyalty, except that she hides her skepticism and personal disagreements so well that he doesn’t suspect a thing until the very moment she gently questions his orders to his face for the first time ever in a last-ditch effort to talk him down, and then almost literally stabs him in the back when he doesn’t waver. WHO DOES THIS SOUND LIKE–

this is , er, Cinder Behavior. the flawless mask of whatever the distrusted authority figure wants to hear hiding loyalty that is extremely conditional? the utter lack of self-worth. the covert subversion and open defiance? they do those in reverse order of each other in v8 but it’s the same in principle.

this in itself is not suggestive of a romantic arc being in the cards however, it does mean that winter is—out of the heroic cast—uniquely equipped to Understand Cinder Fall, for reasons of wearing masks herself in addition to being intensely concerned with the morality of her choices.

(there is something very compelling about winter specifically hearing… anything about rhodes, because winter is the ultimate symbol of atlas in cinder’s mind—a schnee, a soldier, a huntress—and winter would also be viscerally horrified by the way rhodes handled the situation. it’s an obvious narrative opportunity to wrench open a second crack in cinder’s worldview; winter is the last person cinder would expect to be outraged on behalf of the enslaved girl who killed her abusers.)

in conjunction with everything else… hm

[sigmasoyboy]

Hellooo, i saw someone ask the numbers 23 and 25 for the serial killer trio and i really liked the answer. So i wanted to ask the same numbers for the vicetober boys if its okay 😄

Thank you in advance and have a great time 🩷

this one will have to go under the cut due to lenght (・・; we have many boys to talk about

23. Do they prefer romance or affection? What is the quickest way to your character’s heart?

For both Cain and Abel it's a bit complicated to tell. Cain does not trust other living beings anymore and as a child the line between affection and romance were blurred so it's hard to tell which they prefer. Having someone on their side and then some sort of sibling was nice but separation and betrayal hurt deeply so there are no more quick ways to his heart.

Abel only cares about consuming. Previously, I guess you could say that the bond they had with Cain was their preference, though now it matters less than their desire for their flesh. Similarily, there are no way to his heart.

Eli… Only cares about receiving either from Viorel anyway, and their friendship has been ambiguous from the beginning. The quickest way to his heart was apparently just trying to befriend him after a lifetime of neglect, it got him attached to that boy like superglue.

Viorel thinks he is satisfied by friendship alone but he does craves romantic affection, he just think he is not good enough to "trap" someone in an exclusive relationship with him. The quickest way to his heart is giving him self-confidence and blowjobs-- though he is quick to retract back into his shell after his self-esteem issues overshadow the butterflies.

Ismaele pretends he doesn't much care for either. Sex is just a distraction from the horrors, camaradery is just something to indulge in like alcohol or anything else, no one can understand him anymore anyway™️. Deep down he does need affection, no real preference on the type. Quickest way to his heart is to not let him know you're trying to slither your way there lol

Ange has no preference either, he likes caring for people, romantic feelings or not. Previously, he did try to reach out through sex with not much luck though. Quickest way to his heart is having losing dog energy, he has a weakness for the strays no one want.

Doe does not really conceptualize affection as different concepts. There's only what Ange gave him and what he gives back to others in return. He likes being cared for and feeling safe and that's about it. Quickest way to his heart is hugs and food.

Valya used to value friendship above all, he wasn't interested in romance, though it was made complicated by his paranoid tendencies. The quickest way to his heart was unrelenting loyalty and the ability to forgive him, no matter what.

Domen does not actually care about either, they're just tools for him to manipulate others. From the outside though, he probably seem to prefer romance since he's often going on dates and metting people. Quickest way to his heart is flattery, but you'll never be able to truly reach it.

Jesse naturally cares about romance, the idea of being someone's number one obsesses him because it's so out of reach, at this point any affection makes feelings blossom hard and fast which tend to freak people out. Any positive attention leads to his heart, though less so after what happened with Domen made him jaded.

25. Do they have any weird bedroom habits? Any unusual kinks?

Sex does nothing for Cain, he has no libido or interest in it. Abel on the other hand does derive some sick psychosexual pleasure from both hunting and playing with his food (see: the inherent erotism of cannibalism) despite being sexless.

Eli… Doesn't have a bed. He sleeps on his couch, which is almost the only piece of furniture he owns. That's weird in itself. As far as kink goes, seeing Viorel wear his clothes, even casually, really does something to him, and he more than once smelled clothes Viorel left at his place when jacking off. He just has a huge thing for Viorel lol

Viorel's weird bedroom habit is that he doesn't bother with his wheelchair when going to the toilet in the middle of the night, so you can get jumpscared by his grudge-look-alike bedhead crawling in the hallway in the dark since he can't reach the lightswitch from there. Nothing too unusual kink wise, he's got some pretty classic fantaisies like having sex in a semi-public place or doing it half-clothed.

Ismaele just pretty consistently wakes up drenched in sweat throughout the night. Usually he goes to check on Valya then has a smoke in front of an open window before going back to bed and trying to sleep again. As for kinks, he likes being ordered around, especially if he gets praise for doing exactly as he's told.

Ange used to hug himself and pet his own hair to lull himself to sleep. Now he's much more fond of hugging someone else and petting their hair, feeling the slow breathing of someone against him gets him really sleepy. He's got a crossdressing kink (mostly him wearing dresses and such, but he does also enjoys dressing up his partner from time to time); for him it's more about sensations than visuals, even the discomfort of restrictive clothes or the rough sensation of lace can be very erotic to him, though he does also like being called cute and such. Otherwise, he enjoys teasing and light pain (both receiving and giving).

Most of Doe's habits are odd. In bed, it's probably hugging whoever is sleeping with him no matter who it is. He's a real octopus, wrapping his long limbs around the other. As far as it is known, he has no kink in particular.

Valya's in a vegetative state, the weirdest thing about his bedroom habits is just the fact he still has wake/sleep cycles but they aren't really regular so he sometimes falls asleep while Ismaele is bathing him or washing his teeth. Before he was in this state, he used to talk in his sleep a lot and Ismaele would have little conversations with him when he couldn't sleep. He did feel some sexual gratification from dominating others back then but it would be a bit exaggerated to call it a kink.

Domen weirdest bedroom habit was probably that he could not stand hearing Jesse breathing next to him at night so most of the time he would kick him out of his room. If he did grace him with sleeping together in the same bed he would wear ear plugs, and cuddles were only before sleep, no touching during. Kink wise, he was big into somno, but that's mostly because it was the closest to his actual necrophilia kink he could get with a living partner. Next to it being a sadist kinda pales.

When he still had many Jesse had to rearrange the plushies who had fallen/moved on his bed before he could sleep. He would also choose a big one to cuddle during the night since most times Domen refused to sleep with him. He always felt more vulnerable to dark thoughts at night, now it can get to the point where he feels so utterly shitty he'll go to the bathroom to self-harm as the only way to kill the noise. As for kinks, he used to be into the idea of puppy play but Domen kind of killed that for him by kicking and caging him as part of it and making him understand very well how cringe it was and how lucky he was to be indulged… He also has a thing for wearing stocking and panties, but he dislikes being treated like a girl.

[emotionalsupportjedi]

Love Me, That’s All I Ask Of You: Psychoanalysis and Relationships in Phantom of the Opera

“You can't win her love by making her your prisoner” (Morris and Connor, 2011). This line, said by Vicomte Raoul de Chagny, can be considered a critical line about the relationship between Christine Daaé and the Phantom in Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical Phantom of the Opera. The musical details what happens when Christine Daaé, a member of the chorus at the Palais Garnier, rises to take the place of prima donna, and the Phantom takes interest in her and takes drastic measures such as murder to ensure that she maintains her position. Looking at this musical with psychoanalytic theory gives the person watching it an interesting new perspective. Psychoanalytic theory is based on the works of Sigmund Freud, known as the father of psychoanalysis. In particular, his works on core anxieties, defence mechanisms, and trauma are relevant to this musical and its depiction of the Phantom in particular. The main relationship in the musical Phantom of the Opera models the idea of trauma creating more trauma and the negative effects trauma has on relationships.

First, the Phantom’s childhood trauma has started a cycle of trauma in the story, shown in part through his fear of abandonment. In the story, the Phantom was born with a physical deformity, which caused him to be an outcast from society and implied that he was abandoned by his mother. These events are the main cause of his fears, including his fear of abandonment. In Critical Theory Today: A User-Friendly Guide, Lois Tyson discusses fear of abandonment, defining it as “the unshakeable belief that our friends and loved ones are going to desert us (physical abandonment) or don’t really care about us (emotional abandonment)” (Tyson, 2006). One defence mechanism that the Phantom seems to use in relation to this fear is displacement, which is defined as “”taking it out” on someone or something less frightening than the person who caused our fear, hurt, frustration, or anger” (Tyson, 2006). Throughout the first act, the Phantom is seen taking out his anger on Christine when she does something that he does not like or sees as a threat, such as her taking his mask. When she does so in the song I Remember/Stranger Than You Dreamt It, he yells at her and curses her, saying, “Damn you, you little prying Pandora! You little demon! Curse you! You little lying Delilah! You little viper! Now you cannot ever be free!” (Morris and Connor, 2011). Of all the names he calls her, I find “Pandora” to be the most interesting. It is a reference to the Ancient Greek myth about Pandora’s box: the gods and goddesses give Pandora, the first woman, a box filled with all of the evils in the world. Against her better judgement, her curiosity got the best of her, and she released all of the evils into the world. By referencing this myth, the Phantom is telling Christine that now that her own curiosity has gotten the better of her, she cannot be free of him, and she has released his rage onto herself. This use of displacement is a way for the Phantom to protect himself from the fear that Christine will abandon him for seeing his face, but possibly unbeknownst to him, this is a destructive way of reaching this end. This incident causes Christine trauma, and she starts to fear the Phantom and his rage, which will end up with her trying to avoid the Phantom and leaving him.

Another core anxiety of the Phantom’s that drives the relationship side plot of the musical is his fear of betrayal. Lois Tyson defines fear of betrayal as “the nagging feeling that our friends and loved ones can’t be trusted, for example, can’t be trusted not to lie to us, not to laugh at us behind our backs, or in the case of romantic partners, not to cheat on us by dating others” (Tyson, 2006). As with his fear of abandonment, and with most core issues, the Phantom uses a defence mechanism as a way of coping with this fear; in this case, he uses projection. Tyson defines projection as “ascribing our fear, problem, or guilty desire to someone else and then condemning him or her for it, in order to deny that we have it ourselves” (Tyson, 2006). The Phantom uses this coping mechanism throughout the second act, most notably in the final showdown between him, Christine, and Raoul. After kidnapping Christine during the middle of a performance of the opera the Phantom wrote to facilitate this scheme, the Phantom attempts to hang her fiancé, Raoul de Chagny, who has come to save Christine. He tells Christine that it would be her who chooses if Raoul lives or dies by giving her an ultimatum: “Start a new life with me, buy his freedom with your love! Refuse me and you send your lover to his death! This is the choice- This is the point of no return!” (Morris and Connor, 2011). The line “Refuse me and you send your lover to his death” has a couple interesting parts to it. As a whole, it shifts the blame from the Phantom to Christine, as projection does, but when looking at the use of the word lover, it is another way for the Phantom to show how he feels he has been betrayed. In the musical, the Phantom and Christine do not have a formal relationship, whereas Christine and Raoul do. The use of the word “lover” is a way to show that Phantom thinks of their relationship as Christine cheating on him, using the word as a way to deny the couple legitimacy in his mind as he is desperate for her affections. In his mind, since Christine is his, she is betraying him by taking a lover, whereas in reality, Christine is just getting engaged to her childhood friend and her beloved. The combination of her fear from this and earlier situations and the way that Raoul treats her much better is what ends up with a tearful goodbye to the Phantom and their trauma-based relationship from Christine.

As a final point of interest in this essay about fear, Phantom of the Opera uses two of its main characters, Christine and the Phantom, as a way to distinguish rational and irrational fears. The fears that psychoanalysis covers are irrational, ones based in trauma, but are often made up in one’s own head. These fears are shown through the Phantom and his actions and lines that have been discussed in this essay. However, the musical also uses Christine to show the rational fears that would come along with being in her position throughout the musical. Throughout the musical, Christine is constantly being watched and influenced by the Phantom, blamed for the situation by the managers and Carlotta, who is competing for the spotlight with her, and still having to perform parts in well-known operas as if none of this is going on. She is rationally afraid of these situations, and throughout the song Notes… / Twisted Every Way she asks many rhetorical questions about her situation, such as: “Am I to risk my life to win the chance to live?... Oh God - if I agree, what horrors wait for me… in this, the Phantom's opera...?” (Morris and Connor, 2011).These rhetorical questions are manifestations of Christine’s fear. The line that stands out the most is “...if I agree, what horrors wait for me”, with the word “horrors” conveying to the audience and the characters on stage that she knows she is in a dangerous situation. At this point, the Phantom has killed someone in the middle of an opera performance, and Christine is rightfully scared that she could be next, that she could be the victim of a man who is unpredictable in the severity of his rage. Another line that stands out is “in this, the Phantom’s opera”, which serves as a way to show who is in power right now. The Phantom has all of the power over her in this situation, and her helplessness is only fueling her fear. Christine has been traumatised by the Phantom and their relationship.

To conclude, the musical the Phantom of the Opera uses its main relationships to demonstrate how trauma is a cycle that negatively affects both of the parties involved. Looking at the musical through a psychoanalytic lens gives an interesting insight into how relationships can be affected by mental health and our coping mechanisms. Ultimately, it is probably a good thing that Christine Daaé leaves the Phantom in the end; who knows what would have happened if they had ended up together in the end? On a larger scale, analyses like this essay can be used to look at real-life relationships, and those watching this musical may relate to the characters and the situations they are in. While this relationship may be uncomfortable, there is still value in engaging with it and similar works.

Works Cited

Dhar, Rittika. “Pandora’s Box: The Myth Behind the Popular Idiom.” History Cooperative, 17 August 2022, https://historycooperative.org/pandoras-box/. Accessed 18 November 2023.

Morris, Nick, and Laurance Connor, directors. The Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall. Cameron Mackintosh, 2011.

Tyson, Lois. Critical Theory Today: A User Friendly Guide. 2nd ed., Routledge, 2006.

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[unsiredtribrid]

I was watching The Edit again and something else occurred to me I haven’t thought about in awhile. Hope had to work very hard to forgive Roman because her first impulse after Hayley’s fate (fairly, I feel) was to kill him.

Landon gets jealous because Hope holds him at arm’s length and is very touchy/angry at him whenever he does things that break or test her trust. This is because, at this point, Hope has had massive issues (and like, calling it just ‘issues’ is an understatement) with her trust being betrayed, especially by guys she’s dating (Roman). So of course, she’s more harsh and extreme with Landon when he lies to her and fails her. She’s angry at herself for trying to trust him and even angrier at him for being a liar. She has trauma tied up in that.

But then with Josie, Josie specifically lied to put a wedge between Hope and Lizzie. Like, granted, that happened when Josie was at a younger age than Landon and Roman were when they lied to Hope about things. But Josie still lied and caused actual hell in her own life, her twin’s life AND Hope’s life as a result. Like that whole action was self-sabotaging, like I’ve talked about before, because now Josie can definitively never tell Hope about the crush or get closer to her because she’s made Lizzie hate her essentially. The lie hurt all three of them because it made the fighting even worse, too.

It was a pretty big deal. It had an entire episode dedicated to it and it’s cited as basically the crux of how things got even worse between the twins. And not to mention, after that episode is when things between Hope and Lizzie are finally heading in a positive light.

Yet, instead of being angry or punishing Josie, for Hope there was nothing to even forgive. She even smiled. Maybe because, out of all the betrayals from romantic interests so far, this is the only one that was done specifically out of Josie wanting Hope. When Roman betrayed her, she cried because she felt like she was ‘being stupid’ thinking he was interested in her when it was just about what Greta wanted the whole time. When Landon lied or left, Hope felt unsure and unwanted. This happens multiple times and she even tells the prism version of him that she just wants someone to think she’s worth staying for, which implies she thinks Landon views her as not worth it.

Josie is the one whose lie is centered entirely upon wanting to keep Hope to herself. She doesn’t just think Hope is worth it, she also thinks Hope is actively desirable. Enough so that she would betray her sister and herself trying to keep Hope for herself on the off chance Lizzie would go for her. It helps that Hope had a crush on Josie too, so it was also making her feel validated and just… happy.

[thegeminisage]

ranking voyager characters from favorite to least favorite

i meant to do this at the end of season 1 and again after the finale but we'll just have to go with at the end of season 2 instead

seven of nine - i haven't met her yet but i just know.

janeway & tuvok - cop out to do a tie? possibly. they remind me so much of kirk and spock respectively. every time i go "oh no it's gotta be tuvok" it switches to janeway. every time i go "oh no it's gotta be janeway" there's another good tuvok episode. tuvok is such a wonderful look into vulcan culture through the eyes of someone who was not alienated from it and abused by it, and you never doubt his ability to get ANYTHING done, even if it's sketchy as hell. i think about his wife of 68 (almost 69! nice) years and his 4 babies and his orchids and his lute all the time. man can SING. on the other hand, janeway is such a breath of fresh air after deanna troi - who i love, but who was constantly victimized for being a woman. janeway just gets to be janeway - she's excited about exploration, she's deeply compassionate, and none of these things make her weak anymore than they made kirk weak. sometimes her adherence to her Ideals is a little picardian, but i forgive her, because she reminds me way more of kirk

chakotay - sometimes a man builds a bathtub and your opinion of him rises by. a lot. i've always liked the difficult position he was in of trying to balance maquis and starfleet interests and protect both sides from themselves and each other, but the ADDED LAYER that for much of the journey he has CANONICALLY been in love w janeway is simply too much to bear. also, i think his trust issues w betrayal are very gripping and they compel me. he has been through so much SHIT and i do love a little traumatized guy. ALSO also, they don't do enough w this in canon, but in my mind palace he and tuvok HATE each other (chakotay hates tuvok for being a spy, tuvok hates chakotay for nabbing first officer job), which i think is extremely funny

the doc - my best friend the emergency medical hologram...i like that he's a brand new kind of person, even if it brings up infuriating questions about the status of all these endless holodeck characters we create and then carelessly abuse or delete. he doesn't have a name! people treated him like he didn't exist! watching him come into his own and bond w kes has been one of voyager's great delights. also, gay king.

b'elanna - she doesn't always get a lot to do but when she does it's almost always good, racism episode notwithstanding. what i like most about her is how ride or die she is. she was willing to get her ass beat to give tuvok a tiny chance of escaping torture, she was willing to die to take down her own superweapon, she defended chakotay when his actions were entirely indefensible (AND she's secretly in love w him?? girl.), she will not hesitate to do any number of crazy things for Her People, and since she's estranged from her family or whatever they are all aboard this ship. you couldn't ask for a better friend than b'elanna and good for her. also, she gets to be gay with janeway about once a season so far which i've really enjoyed. she could do so much better than tom paris

harry - harry also rarely gets anything to do, but that makes his episodes all the more distressing. he's just a little guy! the so-called baby of the ship, until he was replaced by an actual baby with tiny adorable mother-killing spines on its head. i'm still mad that the really big important harry kim episode we got turned out to be such fucking garbage when the concept was SO good, and i'm not super hopeful for his future, but who knows. btw, he could also do better than tom paris. he and b'elanna could ride off into the sunset w/o him

kes - i don't dislike kes, and her scenes with the doctor are especially nice, but i feel like she, like deanna, gets victimized a lot, and her whole thing with neelix was so difficult it's hard to get the taste of it out even though it's over now. that said, i do love how compassionate and mischievous she is, and i love when janeway gets to give her mom hugs :( <3

neelix & tom paris - another tie. this is so difficult for me because i started out HATING tom paris and really liking neelix, and a few plotlines/episodes made me reverse my opinion. tom paris got a lot better when he was like yeah i decided i'm not gonna be a shitheel anymore! especially that he went on a multi-ep arc tricking us into thinking he was backsliding when really he was doing secret agent shit. props! but he's still not terribly interesting. neelix was AMAZING in the atom bomb episode but my interpretation of him as a guy who was gentle not in spite of but BECAUSE of past suffering didn't last long when he decided to be so fucking horrible to kes for no reason. i really want to get over it with neelix the way i got over it with tom paris, but for now they're both at the rock bottom of this list

for fun, i think my season 1 list would have looked like: janeway, tuvok, doctor, b'elanna, chakotay, harry, neelix, kes, tom paris. probably? it's hard to know now. we'll see how all this shakes out by the end of the series.

[starlightshadowsworld]

Ok so I was watching a danganronpa animatic of an AU where Kokichi and Shuichi are soulmates and of course my brain goes on to think about the themes of trust and love that Kokichi and MAKOTO have (for some reason. I love my boy too much I guess) and was mentally thinking of a scene in some kind of "Makoto is in V3 instead of Shuichi but the events of canon still happened" AU where Kokichi is, y'know, reaching his breaking point where he can't figure out how to stop the killing game and Makoto, y'know, he understands both during this killing game (because he was trying to stop it too or at least keep everyone alive) and all the other previous ones and in private tries to offer him support and tells him how he thinks Kokichi's a good person and he trusts him and loves him (I don't really care in what way this is taken as. Maybe aggressive support?) and Kokichi, of course being at a breaking point and having trust issues, casts him aside kind of angrily because Makoto seems like he trusts people really easily and has probably never felt betrayal like Kokichi had and therefore doesn't believe him when he says all those positive things about him and Makoto SHUTS THAT DOWN HARD. Like he pulls out the determined slightly angry positivity (I don't know if I want to describe it like that but I don't know how else) where it's just like

Makoto is standing tall, his shoulders are tense, and his finger's in Kokichi's face like: Hey, no. I love you and trust you. You don't know anything about me so I will tell you how many times I have been betrayed by friends just because it was convenient and they never or barely gave a half-ass apology. The girl who I thought I could trust to have my back in a situation JUST LIKE THIS WITH THE BEAR AND EVERYTHING tried to set me up for murder. Another girl sacrificed me to find "the truth" on multiple occasions and barely gave me an apology after I was almost starved and had a ton of injuries. I had to try to kill someone because they wouldn't just talk to me instead of attempting to commit mass murder. So when I say I trust and love you I mean it. I may say it often but that doesn't mean I take it lightly. I can't force you to accept those feeling but please do anything but deny or take them lightly. Because I DO love and trust you so much.

Kokichi is fucking BALLING in my head.

Anyway I just wanted to share that since it was on the brain and this is usually my go-to blog for sharing my random DR day dreams and ideas with. Whenever I pop in anyway.

(Sidenote: Protag switch AUs (or even detective switch AUs with Shuichi and Kyoko) between Makoto and Shuichi are so underrated. I don't write fan fiction so I hope and pray everyday that one day I will stumble across one with the quality of the A Change in Variables but that might be wishful thinking)

Oh damn.

That's such a cool idea.

Agreed I love all the protags, Makoto just holds a very special place in my heart.

The way I envision what you've said is that Makoto takes the place off Rantaro or at least plays a similar role to him.

As the Ultimate Survivor, aka someone who's survived the game before and remembers.

Possibly going undercover and not letting anyone else go through this shit again.

The reason for him being there to the outside world could be that Tsumugi wanted a guest star.

And you know having the Ultimate Hope would get people watching.

Makoto talking down Kokichi would be such an interesting scene because he'd be one of the only people who don't hate him.

And would be willing to listen and stand up to him.

Also because Makoto knows what he's doing, he can see through Celest I guarantee he can see through Kokichi.

And it would throw Kokichi off because he's designed this whole thing to have everyone against him, he'd got the perfect plan.

But that's Makoto for you, unpredictable is basically his middle name.

[zahri-melitor]

I missed writing up my Helenapoll thoughts so here we go:-

Joey Cavalieri – I think Cavalieri does some interesting complex things with Helena’s background and in grounding the fundamental trauma that made her Huntress, from the ‘danger of being raised female’ to ‘danger of being a Bertinelli heir’ to ‘danger of mob connections’ to ‘danger of being a vigilante’. It has a level of realism that you don’t generally get in the regular DC comics universe in regards to some of these topics.

Chuck Dixon – Dixon’s the one who cemented Helena into Gotham and put the work in to establish her rocky relationships with everyone else. He gave us Robin III: Cry of the Huntress which set up Tim and Helena’s relationship, which I adore. He gave Helena a clear role in Gotham as the outsider, which is not always fair on her, but provided plenty of conflict for plot momentum and let her yell at Bruce more often. I think Gotham would be lesser without Helena having that position in the group.

Grant Morrison – so DC One Million is unexpectedly good Helena content, to my surprise. It’s one of the few places outside that uses her experience as a teacher really naturally in terms of how it frames her views and actions as a vigilante (apart from all of those regular Helena solo stories where she goes off hunting down the abusers of her students, of course. Which is apparently the ONLY plot anyone can come up with any time Helena gets pitched for a short story/single issue)

Devin Grayson – ooh let me get spicy for a moment. I think Nightwing/Huntress is bad Dick Grayson. I’m less convinced it’s truly bad Helena. Now the fallout from this by creating the ‘you stole my man’ narrative that ends up being the overarching topic of the Helena and Barbara dispute (even though they have multiple other fascinating points of contention) is irritating, but it’s interesting in terms of Helena testing if this helps in any way with how she relates to the rest of the Bats. (It fails) In terms of her other stories, I don’t actually mind Fear of Faith or Spiritual Currency, but they’re very one trick only (She’s! Catholic!) with Helena. They are helpful in building the reasoning for why Helena joins with Pettit.

Greg Rucka – it’s the man himself! Cry For Blood is easily my favourite Helena story, and his hand is obvious in all the best parts of Helena in No Man’s Land. If you don’t like Rucka’s Helena, you don’t like Helena.

Gail Simone – I maintain that Simone took a very complex situation, with Barbara and Helena’s layered antagonism over Dick, the Bat(girl) costume and the two betrayals surrounding it, their differing moral stances on when killing is acceptable and why, their mutual lack of trust from previous failures and personality clashes, and found a way to work through it so they weren’t at eternal loggerheads. They were both justified in their dislike for each other, but finding a way for them to become friends (with screw ups along the way on either side) and move them away from that eternal ‘two women cannot be friends if they’ve ever been attracted to the same guy’ canard was just a really important moment for their mutual stories. Plus it was the first time anyone had really given Helena time to be in a title with more than one other woman (Zinda and Helena and Dinah getting drunk and kicking heads together is something that can be so special).

Tony Bedard – oh the other Birds of Prey writer we tend to ignore. The interesting thing with Bedard’s run is that he gives Helena the space to work as the BoP field leader, given Dinah’s absence, which is a role nobody would have considered for her until Dinah resigned. It’s a growth period for her.

Ivory Madison – I like Huntress: Year One. I really enjoyed it as a story. I think Madison had a lot of fun drawing out the parallels and future echoes in it, and I really just enjoy the background competence given to Helena even at this early stage as she learns to be a vigilante.

[noramthe]

My tier-list of p:eg character after ch1!

SPOILERS PLS DONT LOOK IF YOU DIDNT FINISH CH1

So nothing changed much

The changes

1-kai moved up from A to S

2-Eva and diana moved up from C to B

3-Eloise and wolfgang Moved down from B to C

My favorite will forever be damon my beloved i love him more and more every-time i see him. He’s such an interesting character and protagonist most of all. And i hate when people reduce his character to just an egoist asshole. This includes every character but all of them has flaws and aren’t actually “good people”. They are complex and we have seen some more then the others. Forcing a black or white on the characters is completely ridiculous imo since everyone has so much depth and complexity. I truly think that damon has good intentions but has absolutely no idea how to communicate properly. Like when he was telling the group not to trust each other, in the end why would he say that if he didn’t care about their lives?

His ideas and the way he thinks is constantly being challenged. I really wonder how he will handle conflicts and challenges to his usual way of thinking. I find the fact that he gets embarrassed about people calling him certain things very endearing😔 HES SO CUTEHBCJBCJWHHCBHD

Really looking forward for his growth (or downspairl? Idk😭) I’m sure he wouldn’t have sounded as rough as he is if it weren’t for the situation they are in); but i guess so is all the characters

Kai i loved a lot before but since I didn’t know much about him wasn’t sure if i should put him to S. But ofc after this chapter he deserves this spot sm!! I’m really happy with his screen time this chapter and didn’t hesitate to make him my 2nd fav!

Poor baby has a lot of self confidence issues☹️ i relate to him a bit. It’s the reason i love him and damon bcs one moment I’m thinking about something and the other they say the exact same thing I’m thinking/feeling haha

I’m really proud for kai honestly. I feel he really proved himself this trail by bringing good points and noticing things that I haven’t. I was cheering for him the whole time🥹

Surprised at how his character turned out. When I read his description before the prologue was released. I thought he’s going to be a really awful two faced character?? Instead we got the most adorable whiny crybaby GOD I LOVE HIMM never change kai. I will always love you

Still waiting for mark to appear more i love him sm he’s so relatable fr fr. I love his design and his little beanie(i have a soft spot for characters that wear beanies)

His little remarks were really funny. And the fact that he was kinda being the only sane guy between the chaotic group😭 love you king i hope he’s gonna be more relevant later

Cassidy the queen!! Love her she’s so fun😩 but pls sweetie there is a time and place for jokes girl😭(still adore her)

Desmond and ulysses love their chill vibes sm and definitely enjoyed their appearance on this chapter!(wish they could’ve appeared a bit more)

Diana grew on me this chapter! I appreciated getting to know her more honestly while i felt really sad for what happened to her on this case I don’t agree with what she did when she is trying to take Wolfgang's place when him acting like this was probably one of the reasons he died in the first place (i still understand girl is traumatized to hell and doesn’t know how to cope)

Eva.. god what can i say about this girl

I felt so many different types of emotions for her and even though i was hurt by her betrayal sm because i really loved her and wanted to trust her but god i just feel so bad for her. Cried really hard on her execution girl really felt like she was doomed from the start and even when people showed her kindness she didn’t focus on it just because of how many bad experiences she had that it overclouded her positive experience with damon and diana🥹 she really deserved better (the reason she’s not higher is because im still really hurt by what she did my emotions literally is like a roller coaster)

Ok i will not talk about everyone in c but i will say why i put down two of them

First Wolfgang

I actually liked him in the prologue! But this chapter he somehow annoyed me a little. He seemed a bit controlling so i was wondering what’s up with that. Also him being weird when they were investigating the pharmacy place, when he was thinking about the drugs being dangerous and damon agreed with him and suggested hiding them he immediately just changed his mind?? Tf?

Personally i was a bit terrified of him this chapter but not for long I guess☠️☠️(rip)

Now eloise

This chapter definitely showcased more of her personality. I thought in the prologue she was going to be a shy girl but this chapter definitely proved me wrong-

I don’t mind her but i feel i became less interested on her honestly. Like yeah she’s kinda cool but didn’t really catch me that much

So the don’t care category is as you expect… I don’t really care about these characters nor their designs. Just simply didn’t catch my attention. Sorry.

And finally the kinda annoying category

I know there are a lot of grace fans out here. It’s just she’s not for me

I find her a bit annoying and i personally only like annoying characters when i think they are funny (sorry grace😭)

I just never found her amusing and the rare times where she is chill is the best times for me.

I really don’t like her kind of personality that are really screaming or angry a lot or are really aggressive. She annoyed me in the prologue and i still find myself annoyed by her. Her relationship with wolfgang was cute imo but then he died and now she’s insufferable☠️(listen i get it. They were close and she’s sad he died. Didn't stop me from being really annoyed w her)

*sigh* thank you for hearing my ted talk

I typed so much and deleted so much my arms hurt.

[caffiene-fueled-fuckery]

hiiii can you do a deep dive into hawkeye's attachment styles pretty please :') i don't know much about attachment styles but i love psychology and i'm super normal about that guy (lying) so this is all fascinating 2 me !!!

Hi! I can certainly try!

I'm by no means an expert on attachment theory but I guess I can maybe talk about it since I'm studying it right now and have for a few years. I'm a psych major specializing in psychological development, and a lot of my interests and papers in the last few years have been on attachment theory specifically in adults bc believe it or not, most people think that it's only a thing when you're in infancy and early childhood. False! You actually grow an attachment network as you go from adolescence into adulthood and that's how it stays essentially, but your attachment style is important for the people you choose to be around and how relationship dynamics work (there's more nuance to this but I'm not really sure how to explain it without going super in depth). Anyway... Maybe I should do a general post about attachment theory.

For Hawkeye I think he's definitely in the preoccupied type, but he can also sometimes be a bit dismissing. Let's be real, Hawkeye has abandonment issues. If you think about it, he lost his mom when he was a kid, and it was pretty sudden. She got sick and he didn't really know what was going on, and his dad didn't tell him how bad it was. Then a few days later she was gone. Not only did he very suddenly lose a primary attachment figure, but he likely felt a sense of betrayal from his other primary attachment figure due to his dad not being honest with him. Yes, he was only a kid, but that doesn't stop him from feeling that way. That is still the case to a degree, he mentions it in that one episode... I think it's called Sons and Bowlers? When his dad was going into surgery for something serious and Hawkeye thought it could be cancer but he didn't find out until his dad was already in surgery and he spent forever trying to get through to the hospital. He was rantic and said something about his dad doing it again, likely meaning holding back the severity of an illness from him to protect him.

The loss of a primary caregiver is devestating to a young child even if they don't really understand what happened. The person they've relied on, who they knew was going to keep them safe and take care of them is just no longer there, whether they know why or not doesn't matter. Now, hawkeye I think was a bit older... 10, maybe? So he understood that it wasn't his Mom's intention, but that doesn't stop the pain. It seems very much like he clung to his dad after that, and he seems to have a very secure attachment to him. But I don't think that overall he has a secure attachment style. Definitely not.

The preoccupied attachment style is typically characterized by people who have positive views of others but negative views of the self. This usually means that they want close relationships but don't feel they're deserving of it necessarily or that they can trust others. In a modern sense, they'd be the person who'd text you a thousand times if you didn't respond. They can be clingy and they need reassurance. And while Hawkeye can be arrogant, I don't think he really likes himself that much. I can't think of anything speciifc he says but he definitely seems to think he's not a good person. He probably doesn't think he's ideal for a relationship. And we can see that in his interactions with his ex.

Carly and Hawkeye lived together for over a year, and he was devastated when she left him. Again, abandonment by another primary attachment figure. When she showed up at the 4077th he was hurt and a bit bitter, but when he talked to her he was desperate. He would do anything to keep her by his side, including marriage. And she knew it was desperation. A lot of it was his work that got between them, as she said, because he isn't someone who can put his work second. But another piece of those commitment issues might be that doubt or anxiety around relationships that are more than just sex.

This isn't just in romantic relationships. Think about how he reacted when Trapper left. He was so hurt that Trapper didn't even leave a note and chased after him to try and catch him before he left despite knowing he had little chance of catching him. He and Trapper were always together and he seemed a bit more secure in that friendship... but that went out the window when he left. Now, I don't really know that much about Trapper, esp since he was only in 3/11 seasons. But the effect he had on Hawkeye was immense.

You can see that in the way he interacts with BJ. He's clingy. He needs validation. He's scared of being abandoned again, whether or not he wants to admit it. And in GFA, he gets so irritated when BJ won't say goodbye. Hawkeye knows they won't see each other again, so leaving without a goodbye and a promise of seeing each other again is the same as being abandoned. BJ is important to him.

This validation isn't even just with BJ. It's pretty much with everyone. He cracks jokes and the laughter is validation. Sleeping with one of the nurses is validation. To me at least, he seems to feel inferior when comes to anything that's not surgery. Just as a person. But he also seems to have a defense against that, acting like all he needs are one night stands. Keeping the nurses at an arm's length, never going further emotionally than just sex. Which is why I said he could also fit the dismissing style a little bit, too. It's a defense mechanism so he doesn't get hurt. Dismissing is when someone has a positive view of self and a negative view of others, usually relying on being self-sufficient and independent, not needing close relationships even though they desperately want them. He just thinks people will leave him so he doesn't let people get to close to him. That seems to more be the case with women.

I hope this makes some sense! He has a bit of a mix of styles but I think more preoccupied than anything else. I wanna give poor Hawkeye a hug :(