#truly thank you for this IT MADE ME SO HAPPY
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kastighur · 3 days ago
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← back. ᝰ.ᐟ i’ll wait for you.
𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃 homicipher. mr. crawling. angst ( i tried ). gn! reader // wc : 681
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standing in front of the elevator doors, the human turned towards the crawling entity. staring at him with a solemn gaze as they knew what was bound to happen. though it didn’t look like he did.
“ thank you. “
you told him with a smile, one that was trying to hide the ever growing pain that spread throughout your chest.
“ …you go ? “
he asked and you confirmed it.
“ go together ! “
mr. crawling eagerly replied, moving slightly closer in preparation to enter the elevator with you.
it wasn’t that you didn’t want him to follow you, in fact, his presence would brighten up your lonely lifestyle in that dull apartment. but there were factors that needed to be considered.
firstly, how were you supposed to provide for both of you ? your space was barely enough for one, and if a 8ft ghost was added it was surely going to cramp up the area.
secondly, could he even survive in your world ? what would happen if other humans saw him ? if someone called the cops they would definitely find out about the late night activities you’ve been committing. plus if someone saw that he had skin for eyes….
of course, there were other problems at play but it would take too long to list them all.
with a heavy sigh, you kneeled down.
“ me go, one. “
his smile slowly disappeared.
“ one…? “
his typical bubbly booming tone in his voice now soft and flat.
“ me sad. “
to say your heart hurt was an understatement. it was the kind of pain that made you understand what a heartbreak truly felt like.
“ me wait for you ! “
he offered, beaming once again. he understood that you had a life before landing here. since the beginning he had been helping you find this very exit, and you made it ! he was happy for you but he didn’t understand that you would be gone forever. in his mind you would go through those doors and appear at that same spot where he found you.
“ you go ! me wait ! “
it’s been a while since you’ve felt that sting in your eyes.
“ oh mr. crawling.. “
you whispered in your own language, he tilted his head in confusion but he knew that you’d called him. having heard those two words a few times.
“ hurt ? pain ? “
he quickly asked, reaching out to check your head for injuries and doing a quick scan over your body.
you had to leave before your heart told you to stay. so you stood up and forced a smile.
“ thank you, goodbye. “
mr. crawling stared, then smiled, holding a hand up in an attempt to wave.
“ goodbye. “
the elevator doors opened, you let out a breath you didn’t know you’d been holding in. you caught one last glimpse of mr. crawling before the doors whirred and finally closed.
mr. crawling waited and waited. he would just sit there and stare at those elevator doors which he last saw you. every few hours he would make his way back to where he found you first.
out of desperation he would search around. inside boxes, behind walls and such. maybe you were hiding just like last time.
every whir and creak that emitted would cause him to snap his head up filling him with hope. mr. silvair saw him smiling at the lift once and asked why, mr. crawling replied that you were finally coming back... but hours and hours passed and nothing happened.
usually, he would find a cramped area that he could squeeze into for comfort when he’s upset ( like a little meow meow ). now, he couldn’t bring himself to leave his spot. afraid that if he left and you returned, you would leave again, upset because he broke his promise of waiting for you.
mr. hood stumbled upon the scene once, seeing an ever growing collection of crowbars, wedding dresses, raincoats and…ears..? scattered across the ground.
a long time would pass before mr. crawling would finally break. his whines and whimpers echoing the quiet halls, at one point even trying to pry open the elevator doors.
“ miss you… come back… please. “
> wanted to try angst, but i lowk hate this one. maybe pt.2 where you come back ? idk.
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© @kastighur
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rootspiral · 2 days ago
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Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 4 extra entry
(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1])
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M STILL NOT DONE WITH EP. 4, TRULY A DEMONIC 30 MINUTES OF TV
but @onceuponalegendbg pointed out that I skpped the girls chatting around the fire and that is inexcusable. In my defense the video skipped on its own when I opened it but STILL there is no justification. Alice my love forgive me.
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okay I love everyone's body language here. tag yourself which sapphic are you?
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Jen in episode 2: "Like I care about that dusty, warty, snaggletoothed community." Her identity is so important to her! And the intersectionality between witchcraft and herbalism!
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lilia is so impressed
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and this is what I mean by support system - all the girls here are covenless, they had no one to help them through the hardest part of their life, no one who would listen, support, give advice. people simply NEED community.
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alice is so small. I wish I was there to hug her
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and more parallels between alice and agatha. not being able to save the people they loved made them angry. what does it say about a mother that she couldn't protect her own child? what does it say about a daughter, and a protection witch at that, that she couldn't save her mother? they had no agency, they were helpless in front of tragedy. and like agatha got mad at rio, alice got mad at lorna for ostensibly wasting time with songs and amulets instead of seeking help. anger became a defense mechanism, a way to find blame when there wasn't anyone to blame, to feel in control when there was nothing anyone could have done.
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HER TEARY LITTLE FACE when lilia points out she's no longer angry, just sad. the way she whispers 'you're right'. sweet alice, you deserved the world.
I'll say this about ali ahn's performance, it's not flashy and it gets overlooked among all the powerhouses acting alongside her. but she's building something quiet and steady that really gets to you in the end, like a bittersweet weight on your stomach
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lilia is being so so gentle with alice, encouraging her to sit with her pain while she's safe with people who love her. no, all the anger in the world won't bring lorna back, and it's okay that it's not okay.
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jen is not as overtly emotional, but she has other love languages
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lilia is ranting again and I love love love her for it.
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and then there's this freak
no but really, even if rio's existence goes way beyond human experiences and she cannot exactly share like the others, she's just happy to be there, you know? genuinely glad to be included, interested and fascinated by what they all have to say
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this is just patti's and aubrey's irl dynamic let's be real
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thank you writers and costumes and aubrey for creating this delightful little weirdo just for me, as a treat
the first entry for episode 5 will be up later today!
go to episode 5 part 1
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choccy-milky · 2 days ago
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I was out with my mom at the store and saw this beautiful picture! I instantly thought of Clora and imagined her walking through a flower field with Seb trailing behind! Ahhh! So pretty!! ❤❤
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(I can imagine this piece being from Seb's perspective, or he commissioned someone to paint it for him. We love a simping man 🥰)
thats bc it IS clora 🌼🌿
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but that painting is beautiful AND IM SO HONOURED U THOUGHT OF CLORA WHEN U SAW IT??😭💖 and i love the idea of it being from sebs POV too...him taking her to a field of flowers and just watching and smiling as she twirls and frolics around and brings a truckload of flowers back with them....GRAHHH MY HEART🥹💖💖
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@fulica-atra AW😭😭 i rly do have SO much fun drawing clora and seb all the time BAHHA so im happy if that can come across in my art as well🥹and im glad i could help inspire you too!! omg i was working on a webtoon before HL consumed me, and creating your own universe/characters/original world is definitely a challenge (but a fun one) and im with you there on daydreaming as you fall asleep...its the best part, tbh😤 GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR STORY!! and THANK YOUUU💖💖
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hi and thank you!! so the first 2 times that smut happens in my fic i DO put a warning in the beginning notes, but overall, FROM WHAT I REMEMBER, smut happens in chaps 16 (not a sex scene tho...just some solo seb BAHHA), 23, 26, 27, and 32. there could be more im missing tho/smaller scenes i dont remember, so if you wanna be absolutely certain, you could also read it on ffnet! that site doesnt allow explicit content, so i cut the scenes out before uploading it there. (but i honestly would recommend just skimming past the smut on either ao3 or wattpad, since the ver of my fic that's on ffnet is a lot less polished/not edited💀 and sometimes dialogue happens before/after the smut, but i think i just cut it out entirely in the ffnet ver, i cant remember...) BUT ANYWAY, if you do get around to reading it, i hope you like it!!🙏
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LMFAOOOO speaking of smut...truly the duality of man....i guess this is a sign i should finish the nsfw wips i have rn👀
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BAHAHA THE WAY I THOUGHT THIS WAS GONNA BE SCATHING WHEN I FIRST GOT THIS ASK and saw the preview of 'im trying so hard to get through it..." LMAOO im sorry for making you put up with bitch ass lawley😔🙏 BUT THANK YOUUU AND IM GLAD YOU LIKE IT/ARE SO INVESTED💖💖💖
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and your anon immediately afterwards made me laugh LMAOO. all better now!!! 🥰lawley who???
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@vaiotai bc thats how men SHOULD be when theyre in love🥰i dont make the rules🥰🥰(except for when i do😇)
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azaharinflames · 3 days ago
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trying to interact with the fandom outside of Tumblr is so hard. you find like-minded people and enjoy talking to them and before you know it, a toxic buddie will slide in out of nowhere to try and ruin your day. Instagram comments, YouTube comments, the comments of your moots on Twitter or wherever, nowhere is safe from a BoB coming in and running their mouths.
i'm so tired of it. i just want to ship my silly blorbos but they seem to need every single person who's ever heard of 9-1-1 to subscribe to their doctrine, and if I have to see one more, passive-aggressive, smug little "hope that helps!" I'm going to lose my mind.
sorry for the rant but I needed to write this somewhere and I hope you don't mind.
Hi, Nonnie! Thanks for the ask
Listen, this is the perfect space to rant. I welcome it and I for sure don't mind you chose my blog to rant - happy to be of service, in fact.
And I get it and I understand what you say 100%. To be quite honest, it is one of the things that frustrates me the most, because we make sure to stick to our space, keep the discussions here, and not go borrowing trouble. And yet, that side of the fandom will actively seek conflict, will diminish our feelings, and will try to ridicule us, constantly. It's frustrating, and exhausting.
But you know what? They just want attention, that's it. They crave it. And we've made a point of ignoring them and keeping it in our space, which is why some of them actively try to invade it whilst also pretending to be all innocent about it. I've learned that the best thing to do is to ignore and move on. They don't deserve our attention, and they sure as hell don't deserve our time.
That being said - again, I fully get what you're saying. They believe they are always in the right and play dumb when it's proven otherwise, and they truly think they are morally superior even when they're textbook bullies.
So trust me, you're not alone in your feelings about this.
My inbox is always open for this type of rants, or any rants, for venting, and for discussing (911 or whatever)
Take care <3
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zepskies · 3 days ago
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Ahaha that is a great gif @lamentationsofalonelypotato! Diving into the rest of your lovely comments...
I mean, I'm sad that it's coming to a close, but I'm hoping that in the future there might be a fic with a little Elijah (or a little Jude) running around. 😏
I was also sad to get to the end, but tbh I still had ideas even after writing the ending. So you might be on to something there with a little Elijah... 😘
I love the little details about him and Benny pranking each other, but it really just made me sad because Dean left them 😭 But at the same time they are opening up with one another and sharing their life stories and I couldn't be happier.
It's bittersweet, isn't it? 🥲 On the one hand, bonding. On the other hand, it's a memory of everything Dean's left behind.
Again I stan a strong woman and Mila is just so stinking badass that I love her so much. Also yes girl, PROTECT 👏🏻 YOUR👏🏻 MAN👏🏻
Hahaa I love her too!! 🥰 100% She's gotta protect her man, even if she's not totally sure he should be her man yet. 😝
Love that you're referencing the honorable choice title here, and showing that Dean is a man of honor and that he did make a choice that maybe messed up his life, but he cared more about doing the right thing. And I think you did a great job of titling the series and the chapters in general. Each one corresponds beautifully to the themes in the chapters so you should be proud!
Aw thank you so much!! I try my best to create meaningful story titles and chapter titles, and making room for those moments that reflect the major themes of the story. "Choice" is of course the biggest theme in this story, as it could be for every story--characters making decisions that push the story forward and help define their character.
I know that something dramatic is about to happen and that I shouldn't be thinking about this right now, but I just love height difference so much😭. When a guy is bigger than his girl oh wow it sends me to the moon. I think it's so cute and goodness the cuddles must be so fun.
LOL I love it!! I absolutely love the height difference thing too. 😏 I'd imagine the spooning is the best!
Again, devastating moment, but... SHE SAID HIS NAME FOR THE FIRST TIME! And the running her fingers through his hair?!?!?!?!
She said his name for the first time!! That moment after the river was probably my favorite scene to write, since it's the first time they truly explore their connection. 🥰
I'm cackling. I love Mila so much. The sass, the teasing. Oh goodness they're so cute and I am so scared that there's going to be a last minute perilous situation and somebody is gonna die.
Ahaha don't be too scared! I'm all about happy endings, and I'm so glad you're loving their dynamic. 💜
Also him respecting her when she said that she doesn't have sex before marriage is just so HONORABLE AND WORTHY and why can't there be men that respectful all the time? Dean Winchester is really just ruining other men for me everywhere. 😭
Ughh right?? Dean is just a Good Man, no matter how much he doesn't see it in himself sometimes.
So... the face squishing is a family trait I see. But man, Dean standing there while a random lady just squishing his face while his eyes are wide in horror is so funny to me.
Ahaha I'm so glad you caught that! It was such a funny visual to me too, and I felt like it was something that would happen to Dean. 😂
This bit is so good. It's so true and honest and a little heart breaking, but it's such a wonderful thing for them to talk about, because Mila knows that he's thrown away his life to save hers. And it's so wonderful that he's able to give her that confirmation and reassurance that he doesn't regret the choice he made. Because it was the right choice, the -AHEM- Honorable Choice lol 😂
Aww thank you. There are a lot of bittersweet moments in this, and this is one of them. But like you said, I felt it was important for them to have this moment where she acknowledges what he's done for her, as well as gauging if he holds any resentment. Of course, Dean doesn't regret his choice. 😉
Oh this chapter was so good my sweet friend! I'm a little sad to see that it's ending, but it was so wonderfully written and neither of them died. I was really scared about that 😅. AND it ended with a wedding (sort of?). Now little Elijah can run around the camp helping his mother and learn how to break in horses with his father. ❤️
Thank you very, very much my wonderful friend!! 😭 I'm too much of a hopeless romantic to have either Dean or Mila die. I researched into wedding customs for the Lakota people at this time, and apparently until Christianity reached their culture, they didn't have formal "weddings" in the sense that we know them today. It was more of, as long as the man got the blessing of the woman's father (and gave a nice gift), the couple would pair off and from then on live together as husband and wife.
Safe to say, Dean didn't get the chance to go about that custom lol, but there are other cultural elements I would want to explore in future chapters--along with them having a kid!! I LOVE the idea of Dean finding his role in the tribe by helping take care of/break in the horses. 💕💕
Thank you again so much for reading!
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The Honorable Choice - Part 3
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x OFC 
Summary: June 1872. Captain Dean Winchester of the U.S. Cavalry is tasked with one job: break a wild mustang. He just didn’t expect the woman who infiltrates his camp, intent on freeing her tribe’s horse.
AN: The last chapter! Hold on, it's about to get bumpy...
Disclaimer: I got inspired after a recent rewatch of Spirit: The Stallion of the Cimarron (literally a perfect movie), as well as having Yellowstone in the back of my brain. I’ve done extensive research for this one, both on the American Indian Lakota tribe, and on American history during this time in the late 1800s (AKA: the Old West, during the American Indian Wars and the Sioux Wars). Of course, one of my main goals is to avoid inaccuracies, both historical and cultural.
**Pronunciation guide at the end!
Jacklesverse Bingo24 Prompt: @jacklesversebingo Western AU
Song Inspo: The Spirit Soundtrack
Word Count: 5.7K
Tags/Warnings: 18+ only. Protective Dean, survival situations, smut (mutual masturbation, fingering, and more), angst, and fluff.
🐎 Series Masterlist || Bingo Masterlist
🎙️ Listen to the podfic version here!
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Part 3: Worthy
They travel together for two more days. Dean isn’t really a talkative man, but inevitably, he finds himself speaking to fill the comfortable stretches of quiet plodding across the grasslands.
He tells her about growing up on his family’s farm, where his father was firm but fair, and a larger-than-life presence when Sam and Dean were kids. His mother though, she was the only one who could ever go toe to toe with John Winchester and win.
“She tamed him,” Mila remarks with a smile. Dean’s lips quirk in response.
“I wouldn’t go that far,” he chuckles, “but he knew he couldn’t pull a whole lot of shit with Mom. She’s a real pistol when she’s gotta be.”
Talking about them makes his heart heavy and sobers his mood, so he deflects with other stories, other chapters of his life. 
He talks about going through basic training alongside Benny Lafitte. As privates, Dean pranked his friend by filling his lumpy old pillow with raw eggs and chicken feathers. In retaliation, Benny swapped Dean’s morning coffee with actual dirt and hot water. Their boyish games escalated until they were nearly kicked out of the military.
Dean managed to smooth things over though. He’s always had a way of charming people, even the gruff Sergeant Major, Bobby Singer.
Mila admits that she and her cousin Šóta used to sneak out of the village when they were younger. He taught her how to climb trees, how to fight and protect herself, and how to ride a horse astride, like a man. He was the only one who ever encouraged her to have the “free mind” her mother dreamed about.
The more she confides in him, her eyes sparking with life and her hands gesticulating along with her words, the more Dean listens.  
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On the third day, it’s nearing mid-afternoon when Dean slows Baby to a stop. After miles and miles of forest and grassland covered, they’ve finally approached a large, wide river. Mila stops beside him.
“My tribe lives beyond the river,” she says, “but the current is strong now.”
Dean looks over at her. A question he hasn’t wanted to ask crops back up. He feels that now is the time to voice it.
“Yeah, about that…I’m thinking your tribe doesn’t take very well to outsiders,” he says. “White men in particular.”
Mila presses her lips together. He can tell she’s been thinking the same thing, but she turns to him with a determined set to her features.
“I will protect you,” she says.
Dean frowns. He doesn’t like the sound of that. On one hand, it warms him that she seems to really mean it. On the other hand, he doesn’t want to know what it’ll take for her to protect him.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asks.
She turns her face away and doesn’t seem to want to answer at first.
“Mila…”
“The Chief is my uncle,” she says at last. “He will listen to me.”
Dean blinks. Well, that changes things…maybe.
He’s still not convinced, but at this point, he really doesn’t have many options. It’s either take his chances with her tribe, or become a vagabond. He’s not sure how long he could survive in wilds of the West alone, especially while trying to dodge military patrols.
In the past three days, it’s taken Dean all that time to come to terms with a simple fact. He’ll likely never see his brother again, or his mother. It’s a pain that cuts into him deeply, down to his bones. It stings behind his eyes.
But if he only has two choices, then he at least wants to make sure Mila gets home safely…even if that means he won’t be.
He’s come this far. If his career is worth the price of what he feels is right, then his life is worth it too.
With that decision made, Dean expels a long, somewhat faltering breath. He locks away the rest of his uncertainty, his apprehension, and even his grief. He hides deep inside, where she won’t see it. 
“All right, the current doesn’t look too bad over here,” he says, pointing to farther north along the river. “The horses can make it.”
Mila nods in agreement. She still looks uneasy, though she tries to hide it too. She ventures ahead into the river. Dean follows close behind.
The water is shallow at first, but it all too quickly gets deeper. The horses plod over the river stones and vegetation under the surface, and the humans are led deeper, until they’re submerged into the water up to their waists.
It’s good that Mila rides that giant mustang; if she were on a mare, like Dean, she’d already be sunk up to her shoulders. Baby’s a big girl, to be sure, but Mila is nearly a foot shorter than him, with a smaller frame. He watches her carefully as she makes her way ahead of him.
That’s why he’s able to act fast when Mato slips, dunking Mila under the water. She gasps and tries to cling onto him, but the current is fierce. It pushes Mato down the river no matter how much he scrambles and kicks at the water, braying wildly in distress.
Shit! Dean tugs sharply at Baby’s reigns and strives to catch up to them. He grabs Mato’s reigns and pulls and pulls, until he and Baby are able to drag him to the other side of the river where he can get a foothold with his hooves.
Mila is starting to fall off his back. She struggles to cling on while the river pushes at her, with her wet hair falling in her eyes. Dean leans back as far as he can to try and pull her up.
“It’s okay, I’ve gotcha,” he calls out, even though his heart hammers with alarm.
She reaches out for his hand in turn. Just as his fingers begin to close over hers, a wave from the current crashes into her. A short scream tears from her throat after she loses her grip on Mato’s neck. Without her weight, he’s able to pull himself back up onto the bank along with Baby.
Damn it! Gut-wrenching alarm spears Dean into action. He leaps down from Baby and removes his gloves, his hat, and his uniform jacket, so he can dive into the water. Thank God he’s a strong swimmer.
Mila seems to be too. She carves through the water against the current the best she can and tries to keep her head above the waves, but Dean can see it’s a losing battle. He manages to grab hold of her arm, and then wraps an arm around her waist to keep her close. Both of them work together to try and cling to any passing rock or low-hanging vine as the current sweeps them out toward an ultimate end.
A waterfall.
Of course. Goddamn it. Dean doesn’t know how steep it is on the other side, and he doesn’t want to know. All he’s trying to do is keep himself and Mila above the water.
She hooks her hand around a sharp rock. It bites into her hand, making her cry out, but she clings to it for all she’s worth. She holds onto Dean just as tightly, even though the current wants to take him. She tries to pull him closer, close enough for him to get a hold on the rock as well.
This time, it’s Dean who loses his footing. The rocks slip beneath the soles of his feet when he attempts to gain some leverage.
A shout of surprise escapes from him when he fails, and it gets swallowed up by water rushing down his throat.
“Dean!” Mila yells, for the first time using his name. The last thing he registers is the fear in her eyes—afraid for him.
The river takes him over the edge of the abyss, and he falls.
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He never expected that he would get to open his eyes again, let alone to the sight that greets him. Mila’s familiar face, framed by the dark, drying waves of her hair, is bright with firelight. It dances in orange-gold across her features. Her eyes are warm like rich molasses when she looks down and finds him awake.
She smiles in relief.
He realizes that he’s lying on soft grass with his head pillowed in her lap. She’s taken off his boots and half of his white undershirt; she tore one of his sleeves to wrap around a mercifully shallow gash in his shoulder.
The horses are drinking from the river nearby, with a pile of apples split between them. There’s a fish roasted over the fire, but all Dean cares about is the way her fingers are running through his hair. She sings a soft song under her breath while she passes her other hand over his injured arm without touching it.
He doesn’t understand the words, but he thinks she might be trying to heal him. He’s heard plenty of stories about the Sioux people, most he’s taken with a grain of salt. He does remember Cas saying that their healers are different from doctors.  
Dean’s never given their hoodoo much thought, but right about now, he hopes it works.
“Mornin’,” he croaks.
Mila’s relieved face becomes touched with amusement.
“It’s night,” she says. “You slept for a long time.”
Dean wants to sit up and take an inventory of his injuries, but he can’t make his body move just yet. He’s too tired and bruised. He also likes being in her arms. He likes her fingers in his hair, now moving to his cheek. He sighs through his nose in contentment as her thumb drifts over his overgrown stubble. 
“Thank you,” she says. Emotion is thick in her voice.
Dean meets her eyes again, and he smiles. He raises the back of his hand to touch her smooth cheek, gently. He lets his fingers glide across her tan skin, down the column of her neck. Her breath hitches.
She takes his calloused hand in her slender one. Her long hair falls like a curtain over her shoulder, almost like it’s shielding them from whatever is left to come for them beyond the forest. Dean wraps an ebony strand around his finger, just to feel it fall loosely again.
“You’re beautiful, you know that?” he says.
Mila graces him with another smile from her lips. He wants to know what they taste like.
“I guess you are pretty, for a White Man,” she says teasingly.
Her fingers trace his brow, his jawline, even the tip of his chin. She seems to be avoiding his plush mouth, even though her gaze keeps dropping there. Dean pretends to frown.
“Sweetheart, that’s not the way you talk about a man,” he says.
Her brows raise. “No?”
“Handsome. Strong. Toothsome, if you will,” he says, enjoying the way she begins to blush. “That’s what you wanna call a man.”
“Toothsome. I don’t know this word,” she admits. “Am I supposed to eat you?”
Dean resists the urge to say the first incorrigible thing that pops into his head. Instead, his body shakes with laughter.
It’s difficult at first, all his muscles pulling at him in protest, but he raises himself into a sitting position. He cups Mila’s cheek, dragging his thumb across her lower lip. Her lashes are dark and long. They move when she looks up at him. He knows the look in her eyes, wanting, desiring, but also unsure of what she should allow him.
Dean leans in slowly, giving her time to decide.
She tilts her face up to his. He noses at her cheek, his eyes falling closed along with hers.
He finds her lips with his own on instinct and feeling alone. Soft and tender movements, testing, asking.
She answers him. Her fingers tangle in the front of his tattered shirt as her lips begin to move against his. Dean wraps an arm around her waist and gathers her against his chest. His other hand glides down her arm, down her side and along every soft curve. Her clothes are still damp, and so are his.
“It’ll be faster to dry our clothes if we’re not wearing ‘em,” Dean rumbles. His voice is deep with desire. He presses kisses along the side of her jaw, behind her ear, down her neck and shoulder. He earns her pleased hum, her heavier breaths, and her fingers once again in his hair.
“I can’t,” she gasps. She says something in her native tongue, too fast for Dean to even register. He slows down so he can meet her eyes.
“What was that?” he asks. Her face falls, and she starts to trip over her words.
“I am not…how you say, married. I have to be…”
Dean smiles ruefully, sliding a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Chaste?” he offers. She nods, her brows furrowed. Her grip on his shirt tightens.
“Yes,” she says. “In the eyes of my people, it is…”
“I get it,” Dean says. When she still seems conflicted, he presses a kiss to her forehead. 
“Really, I understand,” he says.
His problem is that he stares into her eyes too long, and at her kiss-swollen lips. He dives back in for another taste.
This time, he’s a little less gentlemanly than he promised. His tongue sweeps along her lower lip, begging entrance. She makes a sound of surprise, but she opens up to him. Her gentle hands slide up his chest to hold his face, and her thumbs stroke his cheeks. He holds one of her wrists to keep her there as his tongue dances with hers. She tastes like the river, and like salty tears.
Had she cried for him? How long did she sit with his body, waiting to see if he would wake up?
Despite those worrying thoughts, Dean knows this feels right. More right than he’s ever felt.
It’s harder than he might’ve imagined, but he still pulls away, before he won’t be able to stop himself. Mila pants for breath. She seems to feel she should let him go, but also doesn’t show any sign of wanting to. Smiling, Dean caresses her cheek one more time before he turns to the fish she roasted.
“This looks good,” he says, clearing his throat. “What kinda fish is this?”
With a sigh, she attempts to steady herself and moves to join him by the fire.
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That night, Mila dreams.
She dreams of wings, white and beautiful. She hears the cry of an eagle before she sees his great wingspan take off in flight. He soon finds his mate, and they dance together in the sky. 
When she wakes, the fire has gone out and it’s still dark in the night. It takes her a moment to realize that she’s safe. Finally safe.
And she’s lying securely in Dean’s arms.
She’s no longer conflicted when she stares up at his face.
She will bring him home to her tribe, and she will explain. If they still don’t welcome him, then she prays for the strength to keep to her honor. Because now, she begins to realize…
Her heart has already chosen.
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“Kimmímila, what have you done?” her uncle asks in the language of their people.
He is Tahatan, Chief of their tribe.
Mila’s father, Chatan, and her cousin Šóta have tied Dean Winchester to a post in the center of the Chief’s large tipi. Dean kneels with his head bowed in respect, even though he keeps sneaking looks at Mila to try and gauge what’s happening. He doesn’t understand a word of any of it.
“You’ve brought this outsider into our village, this White Man!” Tahatan shouts, his voice deep and resounding.
Mila steps forward, despite her mother’s embarrassment and her father trying to grab her shoulder. For the second time in her life, she defies her father for what she believes is right. The first was to rescue a member of their tribe���because even a horse’s spirit should not be broken by greed.
“Uncle, I’ve told you the story, though you don’t want to believe it,” she says. “Dean Winchester saved me when he could have killed me, or worse. He defied his own people. He is dead to his own people, for me, and because of me. You may think they lack all honor, but this man is different.”
She looks over at Dean, and he meets her gaze. He wears an anxious frown as he looks between her and the chief, but she has a feeling that his fear is for her, not for himself.
She kneels beside him, then looks up at her uncle with all the stubbornness she’s ever possessed in her life. She feels it’s led her to exactly this moment.
“And we are one,” she says. Nerves trill up her spine as she says it. She predicts the way shock falls over the room. The way her father curses out loud, angry. The way her mother covers her mouth in dismay. The way the Chief takes a step back, tilting his head at his niece.
“You would take it that far?” he asks.
Her face doesn’t change. “It’s already done.”
Tahatan is beside himself, both angry and perplexed. He goes back to his chair of wicker and wood that lies centered in the room. He drops heavily into it. After a long while, in which he thinks in silence…he releases a heavy sigh. He gestures for his brother and his son to untie Dean. The men do so, but they don’t let him go free. They force him to stand and bring him forward to kneel again before the Chief.
“Dean Winchester,” Tahatan says.
“Yes, sir,” Dean replies.
“You prove yourself to be a man with honor,” he says in English. “Kimmímila has chosen you. She claims you have chosen her in return. Do you deny this?”
Dean glances over at her. She bites the inside of her lip, a bit worried about how he’ll react. She’s not sure he completely understands what Tahatan is telling him, but he nods, regardless.
“No, sir. I don’t deny it,” Dean says.
“Then, you will be allowed to stay, and live among us,” Tahatan declares. "We will see for ourselves what you are. We will see if you are worthy."
Dean gives a nod, crossed with a bow of some kind. He obviously isn’t sure of what he’s supposed to do, but he does say thank you. Mila wraps her hands around his uninjured arm and helps him to his feet. She smiles at him to let him know that the worst is over. He blows out a breath in relief.
“Is that it?” he whispers. He expected more of a thrashing, if he’s honest.
“Almost,” she replies. The two of them stop short before her father, Chatan.
Dean straightens up and holds out his hand. “Sir.”
Chatan glances down at the white hand extended toward him. His gaze raises back up to Dean. 
He grunts in acknowledgement, but he turns on his heels and storms out of the tipi. Her mother comes forward next. She examines Dean from all angles. She takes his face in her hand, somewhat squishing his cheeks, so she can look deeply into his startled eyes.
She seems satisfied by what she finds, and she lets him go. Afterward, she takes Mila’s hand and heaves a deep sigh.
She kisses her daughter’s hand and says nothing else, leaving them to find her husband and calm him down.
Dean turns to Mila with a look that says, please tell me that’s it.
She smiles more genuinely.
“Come,” she says.
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She leads him by the hand out of the Chief’s tipi and through the village. Dean takes in the rows of other tall, cone-like structures covered in buffalo skin, as well as all the faces that turn to stare at him in a mix of curiosity, wariness, and even fear. Some of them whisper to each other, taking their children by the hand and keeping them close.
Dean’s still on guard himself, even when Mila takes him to a smaller tipi. It’s been closed up for a while now, by the look of it. Weeds have grown right outside the entrance. 
“This one’s yours?” Dean asks.
She pauses, giving him another small smile. “Ours.”
Dean raises a brow. Ours. Really?
She opens the flap in the front and beckons him inside. There’s still enough daylight to shine through the outer lining. Inside, his gaze flits over the old pile of stones in the center for heating, clothes folded in the corner, some cooking pots and utensils, paintings on wood and clay, and a couple of beaded decorations. Buffalo skin bedding is laid out on the other side with a couple of soft looking furs. 
Son of a gun. Dean doesn’t even blink as he processes it all. He’s in a damn tipi. This is really about to become his life.
Shaking his head a little, he forces himself to focus on Mila. She’s his anchor, and she seems to sense that he’s reeling. She guides him to sit beside her on the bedding, holding his hands in hers. After a moment, he reaches up to tuck a curling strand of hair behind her ear.
“You didn’t get in too much trouble because of me, did you?” he asks.
She shakes her head. “No. My father and uncle are very similar. Strong to anger, but it is quick to run out. At least with me.”
Dean thinks he understands. Short fuse, quick fizzle.
“There is just…one thing,” Mila says. Her eyes fall away from his, like she’s embarrassed. He squeezes her hands.
“What?” he asks, his brows furrowing. It gets her to look at him again, but she seems worried to tell him.
“To convince my uncle to let you stay, I told them that we…” she trails, trying to find the right words in English. “That we are married.”
Dean’s brows raise high. His heart trips up faster. Okay, “ours” makes a lot more sense now.
“I am sorry,” she says quietly. “I didn’t want you hurt—”
“Sweetheart,” Dean says, cupping her cheek. Even with the hammering of his heart, he grins. “I’m pretty sure that’s where this was going anyway.”
In fact, this is a best-case scenario, as far as he’s concerned. He leans in to kiss her, and it doesn’t take long at all for her to sigh in relief, melting against him.
“We’re married, huh?” he asks. “No ceremony? No white dress?”
“We are bonded,” she replies, nodding as she meets every one of his kisses. “Or, we will be.”
She tugs him closer and revels in the feeling of his hands beginning to roam her body, sliding down her waist, her hips and thighs.
“Guess that means we have to seal the deal,” he grins. His lips drift away from hers to burn a familiar path across her cheek. He takes to nibbling her ear, making her flinch and laugh as it tickles.
“Seal-the-deal. What does that mean?” she asks.
Dean chuckles lowly in her ear. “Oh, I think you know.”
He guides her onto her back, over the comfortable mess of furs. He wants to take his time exploring every inch of soft, tan skin, but he first sweeps her hair away from her eyes, the back of his hand brushing against her cheek. She smiles up at him softly.
“Do you regret?” she whispers, reaching up to touch his chin with two slender fingers. “Do you regret helping me?”
Dean considers her question. He knows he’ll carry his family in his heart until the day he dies. His brother, his mother, the memory of his father. Benny and Cas, even Jack, and so many others.
It’s already a heavy burden, but he had always been prepared to lose his life on the battlefield, in service of his country. At least this way, he gains a new life. 
“No. Never did,” Dean replies. “Not even once.”
He bows his head toward hers, and he proves it to her. His lips capture hers, fueled by passion and wanting. Mila’s hands slide over his shoulders and down his back. Maybe without her realizing it, she implores him to let go of the weight heaped on his shoulders.
When he begins to bunch up the hem of her dress, she sits up to help guide his hands. Her quickening breaths mesh with his as the first layer of clothing drops beside the bedding. His tattered shirt joins her dress, along with pants and shoes and boots, until all that’s left is skin against warm, bare skin. He lays on his side right beside her and explores wherever she lets him begin.  
“Beautiful,” Dean murmurs, as his lips follow the column of her neck, down between her breasts. Her breaths rise to meet him, especially when he begins to toy with a dark, pebbled nipple. Her fingers slip through his hair, and his name falls from her lips. He palms one breast while kissing and gently teasing the other, exploring sensitive flesh and grazing her sensitive fleshwith his teeth.
“No man’s ever touched you?” he asks, despite knowing the answer.
She shakes her head, her fingers gripping his hair tighter as his lips and tongue move against her skin.
“No,” Mila gasps a reply. Her hand slides down the back of his neck, and the more he teases her, her nails soon create faint red lines down his back, her thighs squeezing together. She feels a throbbing ache at the very center of her. Despite her inexperience with men, she knows what it means, and she knows what she wants.
Dean’s mouth drags away from her breast. He pulls back so he can meet her eyes. A smile curves his lips, and he takes one of her hands from his shoulders. 
“Have you ever touched yourself?” he asks. He guides her hand down her body, brushing over a wet, sensitive nipple, down her stomach, and between her legs. This time, Mila nods in answer. She stares up at Dean with eyes like molten honey. He leans in to kiss her neck.
“Show me,” he says.
She shudders at the depths in his voice. It increases the flood of wetness she already feels, even before she slips two fingers between the folds of her sex. She gathers some of that slick and circles it over the source of her pleasure, the small nub above her entrance.
Dean takes his hardened length in his hand. While she writhes by her own hand, he drinks her in with his eyes. A soft groan falls from his lips as he pumps himself a few times, sliding a thumb across the weeping head of his cock.
He can’t be a spectator for long though. He nips tantalizingly at her neck, creating a zing of added sensation across her skin. She whimpers, though she tries to stifle it, her knee bending further.
“It’s okay, sweetheart,” Dean says. “Let me hear you.”
He releases himself and replaces her hand with his own. He slips two long fingers inside her drenched entrance, earning a gasping moan from her. She latches onto his shoulders and buries her face into his neck. She whispers fervent things he doesn’t understand, but it only spurs him on.
His thumb circles insistently over her clit as his fingers pulse inside her. Her hips buck a needy rhythm against his hand, until her thighs begin to shake, and her inner walls squeeze even tighter around his fingers.
“Shit, that’s it, baby,” he pants gruffly against her cheek. “Let go for me.”
Warmth snaps and floods from her throbbing core, and she cries out near his ear, her nails biting into his skin. Her release coats his fingers.
Mila drops her head back against the furs underneath her. Her chest rises and falls quickly while she tries to catch her breath, her eyes tightly shut. Dean surprises her with a soft kiss.
“Mila,” he prods. He wants to see her eyes again, so pretty and wanton when she comes. He veers away from her lips to kiss her cheek, and then the other side of her neck. “Let me see you, sweetheart.”
She huffs a small laugh. Opening her eyes, she gestures to her bare body. “This is not enough?”
Dean’s lips tug at a smile. He shakes his head. “As a matter of fact, no.”
He shifts over her, finding his place between the cradle of her thighs. His elbows come to rest on either side of her head. She feels trapped by his body, even as she welcomes his weight and the feeling of his arousal, long and heavy and hard, trapped between their bodies. This man fills every corner of her world in this moment.
“If I’m your husband now, that means I get all of you,” he says with a grin. She gazes up at him, both in blushing amusement and affection.
“All of me,” Mila repeats. She takes his face in her hands and brings him closer, until her lips are a whisper from his. “Then I want all of you.” 
Dean chuckles. “You sure about that?”
She smiles in satisfaction, and her lips claim him this time. One kiss turns into many, each one mounting in passion and desire. Dean groans into her when she begins to touch him. Her hands are soft, but direct in their seeking; they caress his shoulders, run down his chest and stomach, and then, more tentatively explore the now painfully hard length of him pressing against her.
He makes a grateful sound of pleasure when her hand wraps around his cock, squeezing gently. His fingers bury themselves in her hair.
“I want all of you,” she says, this time a plea and a demand all at once as she strokes him.
Dean nods in agreement. He’s come this far. He can do that for her too.
He spreads her thighs a bit wider and encourages her to adjust the angle of her hips for him. His hand glides down her plush thigh and gets a healthy grip. Then he slides his hand under hers and guides his cock through her folds, first just holding himself at her warm, wet entrance.
He manages to wait for a second, in order to meet her gaze. She’s already holding onto his arms tightly, like he’s become her anchor. Her thighs wrap around his hips and beckon him closer.
Slowly, he pushes inside. He takes care in how he works her open. She winces at the sting of his girth stretching her, but his fingers once again massage her clit, stroking her arousal back into a keening flame. He swallows her gasps and moans as he bottoms out inside her, fully sheathed. Tears prick at her eyes, but not from pain.
Mila’s dream flashes like a waking vision behind her eyes. Wings take flight, along with the gleam of a golden beak and a sharp eye.
She blinks, and the image disappears. She’s left with the man who has become hers, making love to her with every stroke of him deep inside her. She presses grateful kisses across his neck and shoulder, wherever she can reach while she clings to his strong arms.
The thick head of him brushes a sensitive place over and over, one that tightens the coil in her lower belly and makes her core tremble again with warmth, until her body convulses against him, pulsing in pleasure, gripping him tight from the inside. Mila’s fingers clench in his hair just as tightly as her release hits her in a powerful wave; even her voice becomes lost to it.
Gritting his teeth, Dean grips the soft flesh of her hip and chases his own end. The way her inner walls choke his cock, he has no choice but to come hot inside her, his spend mixing with her own release. A strangled shout tears from his throat.
He has to brace himself before he crushes her. With his forearms resting on either side of her head, he lowers his forehead against hers. Her legs slip from where they’ve been tightly molded to his hips, her feet meeting the floor. Eventually he slips out of her. He watches his seed drip out and create a mess on the dark furs. The sight of it satisfies something primal deep inside him.
Later he’ll ask her about washing up (and about supper), but for now, he just turns onto his back beside her. She inches toward him, and he raises an arm so she can splay out against his side. They both lay there for a moment in the quiet, just catching their breath together. It marks the end of a long journey, and yet, the start of one too.
Mila turns to raise onto her elbow. She reaches over to wipe the sweat from his brow in a tender touch. Dean smiles up at her. He takes her hand and presses a kiss into her palm.
“I could get used to this,” he says.
Her eyes widen in surprise, but then she laughs softly. “Yes.”
Her hand moves down to his chest, over his heart. She sobers as she considers her people, and how much trust has yet to be bridged—not only her own father and uncle, but the entire tribe. When she led him through the village, they called him wašíču.
Fat-taker. Greedy White. Not one of us.
“It will be hard for you here,” Mila says. She worries it will be too hard for Dean.  
He just squeezes her hand, earning her attention through tumultuous thoughts.
“I’m not afraid of a little hard work,” Dean replies. His usual confident charm is infused in his smile, but she has a feeling he’s just trying to reassure her.
Sensing she’s not convinced, Dean reaches up to hold her cheek, guiding her to look at him and not the floor.
“Listen. I made my choice, and I’m sticking it out, come hell or high water,” he says.
Mila’s brows knit together. “Hell-or-high… What does that mean?”
Dean sits up on his elbow along with her. He takes her chin between his fingers and meets her gaze.
“It means if you want me, you’ve got me. The rest, we’ll figure out as we go along,” he says.
A smile slowly lightens Mila’s face. She tilts her chin up to meet him with a kiss.
“I will be with you,” she says. It’s a promise.
Dean smiles back.
“Good,” he says. “Because that’s just about all I need.”
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AN: There we have it, friends. 💜 I really, truly hope you enjoyed this mini series! To be honest, I have more ideas for this little world (like how Dean might try to assimilate into this culture), but I'll leave it to you guys to let me know if that's something you'd be interested in reading.
Until then, I would love to know what you thought of this chapter! 
Pronunciation Guide:
Šóta ("sho-tah") Chatan ("chat-tan") Tahatan ("ta-hat-tann") Wašíču ("wash-ee-jew")
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pillowspace · 1 day ago
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csd ask about that cool concept you had for the end of the fic? may we know any more about it? :3
OH. HEY WAIT, DID I EVER SAY WHAT THAT WAS? I don't actually know what you're referring to exactly, but I can guess
Y/N was never actually from that universe. The CSD universe. They were never even from it. I don't know if you remember the frankenfate au but this was a little secret I held that made frankenfate funny to me, because... because Vale kinda was from a soulmate AU. It just wasn't of the soulmarks or red string variety.
Y/N had a destiny in a modern mer!DCA world, but they were taken from their universe as a toddler to eventually give Sun and Moon a weakness years down the line. I... I know it was William Afton's doing, I think Henry had trapped him someplace and he needed the power of multiple gods to escape or something like that? So he was using Eclipse to get his way, but he secretly had plans to also kill Eclipse once it was all done? That was probably it??
Being brought into this universe, it was like... forcefully jamming together two soulmates when Y/N's narrative was meant for a different Sun entirely. Y/N would find this out later, and although it'd be horrifying to them, they'd eventually decide that it didn't matter if this bond was planned with ill intent, they cared about Sun and Moon now so they had to HELP them! Once William or whatever the hell I planned to call him had trapped both Sun and Moon and gotten what they needed out of Y/N, William would just... send them back off. You've completed their role in this universe. Bye bye now.
So Y/N would've been sent back to their original world. Lost and horribly confused. They were only human. They didn't know how to go back. They're still reeling from realizing that they had been a trap since the moment they met Sun. They could just... stay here, even if they're too scared to approach their own family. Knowing how their life was meant to play out, it's not hard for Y/N to stick close to the sea and soon meet the Sun and Moon they were fated to meet. And it feels like something's clicked, they had always been drawn to water, but they also feel so... empty. Their wants conflict with their fate because a god had decided to tamper with it. They miss their universe, this isn't the home they were raised in, they want to go back!!
And then they meet Michael and Elizabeth. Two gods who Y/N had met in godly disguise before, so they don't recognize the siblings. But Michael recognizes them, and after some conversations, Michael picks up on the fact that Y/N isn't some parallel version but instead the very same person he had met before. So Michael makes an offer. I can't get you directly back to your universe, it doesn't work like that. But it does work like a staircase. Each step is a different universe, and if you'll let me help you get through each world having fulfilled a goal, you'll be able to move on to the next. At the end of that journey will be the universe you truly see as home.
Y/N agrees, and later has a heartfelt goodbye with the mers. I'll... note that the mers don't really talk, so it was just Y/N thanking them, apologizing, and wishing them well in life.
Truthfully, I know I had a reason for how this happens, but I can't remember it: CSD Eclipse also travels with Y/N. They're there, I can't remember why 😭 But their dynamic is... easier then. The two (three?) of them bicker back and forth, but that's a lot healthier than whatever Eclipse had going on previously.
Fun fact!! One of the universes they would end up in on their journey back to the CSD Universe would actually have Sunna and Meno. Y/N would've gotten to meet them separately. Eclipse would've had... feelings about that universe.
I didn't want to drive in the idea of soulmates being this big and necessary thing, so Y/N would eventually come to learn after their happy ending with the gods that the mers are now happy with friends of their own. Everyone got what they wanted, even if the whole rhythm of life got disrupted into a new story.
SO? SURPRISE? CSD Y/N WAS FROM A MER UNIVERSE THE ENTIRE TIME? I hope this is coherent, I'm fighting for my life to sound even remotely coherent in any of this
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sweetlambeyed · 15 hours ago
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ive been following ur blog for years and id like to say ive always loved your art, always loved ur analysis and ur music links as well. i own a toh print you made which is actually the only fandom print ive ever bought lol. anyways, this is all to say youve got some casual fans who hope youre doing well, and i truly dont understand why anyone would be so mean online about whatever some weirdos r mad at u abt. u dont have to post this or anything just wanted to say stay strong KeepUrPeace and have a happy holiday! (also: i really love ur OCs and their stories, so if you ever made a webcomic or something similar, id be super interested in reading/buying/supporting that. you have a very unique style and its hard to find stuff that scratches the same itch it does. of course ur health comes first so no rush or anything on that just... u know.)
oh my goshhh thank you so much.. this is one of the sweetest things anyone ever said to meh .. i really appreciate it T_T i want to share my work .. i really really want to share my work so badly. i will continue to do so for as long as i still know people like you want to see it, your kindness fuels me to continue forward despite all my worries.
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halcyon-deluxe · 16 hours ago
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Keep breathing, be gentle with yourself. Your grief is sacred, an honoring of your love. Take the time and space that you need. Thank you for sharing your light, don’t worry about tumblr -we’ll be here when you’re ready to come back.
Thank you anon. My grandmother was one thing but I was not prepared for my close friend to pass away last week either. So it's just been a lot.
I thought that I'd have a handle on death since my dad and my dog both passed within the last year, but all of these instances have just made me realize how differently love can exist and change our lives.
And above all else, how truly unserious life is.
I've been trying to come to terms with my dog and my dad even now, so my grandmother and my friend passing on top of this has been almost unbearable. But, I have so much to look forward to in the future. I think it would make all of them very happy for me to stay focused on applying to gradschool and making something of my life. I'm just sad none of them will be here to celebrate with me 🙁 because they were all rooting for me.
That being said, one thing I learned after Abby passed- my friend and the wife of my best friend- was how little I've done with my life. I really need to step on the gas and start living more.
So, if I do get accepted into the program I'm applying for, I am going to do so much with my life when I move. I've already made a list of changes I am going to put on myself to make more out of the time I'm given 😁
Things are bleak now, but the future is so bright. I just have to stay optimistic about it.
Thank you for your kind message anon. I'll be here on and off, but I've deleted all my other social media to help clear my mind. I'll be back regularly one I get my life back on track 🙂
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traintrainingmontage · 2 days ago
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Another Year Older
A little bit late, but this is for my lovely pal @konnosaurus!! Happy birthday!!
It was late at night, and the sheds were quiet. A "Happy Birthday!" banner had been hung up in the back of James's berth, but the streamers and confetti had already been swept up, the cake eaten, and the candles blown out. Now, the birthday engine himself was wide awake, somehow unable to settle down for the evening.
"Penny for your thoughts, James?" came a gentle voice from the next berth over, and James looked over to see that Edward was also awake, and staring over at him contemplatively.
"..." There was a beat of silence as James gathered his thoughts, then finally spoke. "Edward, I'm almost 110 years old."
"That's true," Edward agreed, not yet seeing where James was going with this, but willing to follow along.
James couldn't help but sigh. "I don't know. I thought... I'd feel different. Smarter. Better. Even MORE splendid." He let the thought linger a moment, then looked wistfully at the skies. "But... I'm still just the same old me, still making mistakes."
Edward chuckled gently, deciding to refrain from talking about today's incident with the frogs. "Well, James, you're not the only engine who's had to give this some thought. Let me ask you this: if you could tell your past self anything, what would it be?"
James looked over at Edward, confusion all over his face. Why was Edward asking this?
However, Edward seemed more content to wait for an answer than explain himself, so James mulled it over. "I think... I would tell myself not to worry so much. And how to deal with trucks. And to calm down and not get so wrapped up in things that I forget what's important. That sort of thing."
Edward smiled at the sincerity in James' answer, pleased that he'd thought about it seriously. "Well, why don't you tell our newer engines that?"
It was the second time tonight that James felt nonplussed, and he didn't particularly like it. "What do you mean?"
"You could help mentor them," Edward replied patiently. "Help them the way others helped you when you were a younger, newer engine. I'm sure you'll see how much you've grown as an engine when you're helping the newer ones figure things out."
Although the advice was sound, James couldn't help but hesitate. "Edward, I'm not like you. I don't have all the answers. I'm not cut out to teach people."
"Why not?"
The simple reply stole all the steam from his funnel, leaving James speechless. Taking that as permission, Edward continued his thought. "You're a more thoughtful engine than most give you credit for, James, including yourself. You've learned a lot in all of your years on this railway. You're not the same engine as you were then, even if who you are at your core hasn't changed. You've grown. I've seen it, the others have seen it... I think you'd be a great mentor if you wanted to be. But if you don't, then at least just have faith in yourself and how far you've come."
James took a breath, unable to completely refute Edward's words. He wasn't sure if he was truly as impressive as Edward made him out to be, but he couldn't deny that his firebox felt warmer at the praise. "...Thanks, Edward," he murmured, a small smile finally making its way onto his face.
"Of course, James," Edward beamed. "Happy birthday."
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hemlockesprings · 3 days ago
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hey babe, i love your music so much it makes me so emotional and happy and i wanted to write a letter to you but omg ur on tumblr!!!1 i became a fan around late september (do u remember?) before your ep came out and it dug me out of my depression and made me love music again (im a musician struggling). i still listen to all of your songs when i need to feel some real happiness and warmth. ive heard them so much and right now im listening to you again and it all holds up after countless plays. truly a perfect ep. theres so much i want to tell you but i just want you to know how much i love you and what you do, stay strong lovely one
Thank you so much lovely! 🥰 This year was pretty tough, but I am surrounded by friends, family, and most importantly, people like yourself! I am also a musician struggling (lol), but know there is a person out here (me) who related to you and wants to see you succeed! Love ya 😘🔒💕
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jamie-prescott · 10 hours ago
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Jamie gave a small nod of his head as Sebastian spoke. "I truly appreciate that, Sir and I do look forward to seeing it." He told him, watching as the man moved closer to him, but didn't move away as the Dominant continued to speak. "My parents felt it was important for me to know how to swim when I was little, and I just enjoyed it." He told him. "I was thinking just some friendly and casual swimming, Sir. I'm not really a very competitive person." He knew how to compete and did his best, but Jamie didn't really have the same level of desire to win. He preferred to just enjoy it and not put a whole lot of thought into if he won or lost.
The submissive loved Noah dearly, and did his best to try and be a supportive friend, but not overly bearing either. "I feel lucky to have him as a friend. He was the first person who truly helped me feel welcomed when I arrived, and for that I will always be thankful for him." Jamie said, giving a small nod at the other's words. Noah did have a bit of a habit of falling into his hermit like ways and sometimes he'd seemingly disappear from social interactions for days at a time. "He has his moments, Sir."
Jamie couldn't have hidden his initial reaction about Oliver if he'd tried, but that was mainly due to the fact Jamie couldn't lie to save his life. He wasn't ashamed of his fondness of Oliver though, because at the end of the day the only thing that mattered to him was the Switch was happy. If that included Jamie in the picture, great, and if it turned out that it didn't then Jamie would accept the other's choice.
He wasn't entirely surprised Sebastian was aware of Austin's plans. His roommate had publicly announced it, so it made sense that Sebastian knew. "I think it will be a fun little twist to a traditional Thanksgiving dinner." Jamie told him. "I do know family is important to you, Sir-- especially where the two of you are concerned." Jamie said, having heard bits and pieces of the Smythe parents from both of the twins. "I think it's great the two of you spend time together for the holidays." Family was an important part of the holidays, and the one thing Jamie did miss being here even if it was a lot easier to handle compared to last year. "Oh." Jamie said, unaware that Sebastian had already planned to include him in their plans. "That was very kind of you, Sir. Thank you."
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Sebastian chuckled. "Give me a couple of days then, and I will work on a number for you to come and watch, for your eyes only." He raised a brow, then moved closer to the other male. "I can see why that would make sense, considering where you come from, so no. I wouldn't mind having and swimming every once in a while. But I have to ask- Would that be some friendly, casual swimming, or would it involve us having a little competition to one another? Because I warn you, I have a strong competitive side. So you will see, I have no problem with it being either way." Sebastian felt it would be fair for him to let him know things like that, specially considering the potential future he had with Ollie, which eventually would make him and Jamie family.
The Dominant chuckled when Jamie made that comment about Noah. "Then he is lucky to have you as a friend. Nudges like that always come in handy and- I don't know, he strikes like the kind of guy who could use those more often than not.
It was impossible for Sebastian not to notice the way Jamie's face lit up when he mentioned his twin brother enjoying what time he spent with the other, and in return he couldn't help but smile himself. If there was one thing important to him it was his brother's happiness, and he could feel Jamie made him genuinelly happy. "Ah yes. Fabray's fried turkey. I heard about that. Sounds like fun." He put his hands behind his back. "Ollie and I always spend the Holidays together. It's a family tradition, and family means everything to us. But I'm sure you already know that." He smiled. "I told Ollie you can come to have dinner with me and Elliott, and he said he will bring you over, after some due stops, no problem."
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akai-anna · 1 year ago
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So I just recently read your post about decto relationships with the bingo card thing, and I enjoyed it a lot and wanted to hear more of your opinions on other relationships. I would like to see which other relationships you choose and how you view them.
Firstly, I would like you to know: I cannot even put into words how happy this ask made me (the fact someone was curious enough to ask something from me unprompted! the fact that SOMEONE TOOK THE TIME TO APPROACH ME TO ASK!! AND ABOUT DETCO!!!), so thank you very much for making my day with this and giving me that dopamine rush. (Also, thank you for your patience, I got too busy and took me much longer to answer than expected!)
Secondly, notes still apply:
as in the previous ask about relating to this topic, i interpret relationships in the broadest possible sense
i check everything that makes sense to me, even if they seem contradictory; i view them applied to different situations/universes/possibilities
ship opinion bingo in question
*cracks fingers and rolls up sleeves* Now, let's get down to business.
I. Kudou Shinichi/Edogawa Conan - Miyano Shiho/Haibara Ai - Detective Boys Trio
The Elementary Squad
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I have A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM SO GET READY.
In general, the friendship (friendship is a canon relationship!) these 4 (then eventually 5) little menaces of my heart share, is so very precious. The way these 3 latched onto him, and integrated him into their little group, how Shinichi LITERALLY ACTS LIKE HIMSELF AROUND THEM DESPITE THE KIDS HAVING NO IDEA ABOUT HIS TRUE IDENTITY. HE IS AUTHENTIC AROUND THEM. Also I forgot the number of times the kids called Shinichi out on his BS (like him switching between his adult and child speech patterns when interacting with adults/the police and disappearing acts) and how many times they all get in soooo much trouble because they are lil troublemakers, so curious, never saying no to adventure.
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Shinichi is a mentor to them, teaching them about stuff but also their friend. Shinichi is Big Brother material, and the kids know that they can count on him, turn to him in need, and Shinichi cannot help but indulge them, involving them in stuff to an extent, while also trying his damnedest to keep them safe and protect them (even at his own risk and safety, bodily protecting them).
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And then you add Ai to the mix, and she gets integrated into their tight-knit little group. Not only Shinichi finally has a connection to the BO with her, but also someone who is in the same situation as himself and someone who needs his protection. (AND SOMEONE WHO TEASES HIM LIKE HE DESERVES IT! AI-SHINICHI BANTER IS SO GOOD! LOVE THEM!) And Ai finds herself not only friends but a family. (Sometimes a family is one middled aged man, 2 fake and 3 real elementary students.)
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She encounters unconditional kindness, which melts her cool exterior and as time passes she not only comes to care about these people, but also learns to lower her barriers. And ultimately makes the choice to be with them despite the risks.
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You can give me these 5 kids in almost any combination and I would be so happy to see them (and could talk about them for hours without stopping, almost did them in different combinations separately, God, save my soul). Special mention: Mitsuhiko-Shinichi/Conan dynamic gets to me so bad because Mitsuhiko is the most curious of the 3, when it comes to knowledge. He LOVES learning, and applying what he knows (just like a certain someone we know). And Mitsuhiko learns well; he absorbs what Shinichi tells and shows him. (And I love how complex his feelings are about that.) Also the parallel between Heiji and Mitsuhiko, my HEART-
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I could go on forever about these children of mine (AYUMI AND MITSUHIKO'S PUPPY CRUSHES ON SHINICHI AND AI RESPECTIVELY, HOW THEY ALL PLAY SOCCER AND HIDE AND SEEK TOGETHER, THEIR LIL ANTICS, HOW THE KIDS LEARN TO THINK FOR THEMSELVES- *GETS SMACKED WITH A PILLOW IN THE FACE*), so have this utterly adorable lil thing to close this section.
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⊱✿⊰
II. Vermouth/Chris Vineyard/Sharon Vineyard -Kudou Shinichi/Edogawa Conan (- Mouri Ran)
This is such a delightfully precious and weird dynamic. I don't even know how to describe it, really because 1) there is so little content of this (WHERE IS MY VERMOUTH BACKSTORY/ARC!!! WHERE!!! WHERE IS MORE OF THEM!!! WHERE!!!) relationship in particular and 2) how do you even label something so unusual? Vermouth having such a solid opinion of Shinichi and Ran while the other two are so unsure what is exactly going on. (Shinichi is definitely suspicious of her with GOOD REASOn but also Weirded out I feel while Ran knows even less.) SO BEAUTIFULLY IMBALANCED AND WEIRD.
I guess, in short: Vermouth having a life-altering meeting with these two, only for Shinichi and Ran for it to be The Most Natural Thing?
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I JUST LOVE HOW VERMOUTH IS SO FOND OF THESE TWO. (SHE LITERALLY HAS PHOTOS OF THEM!!!) HOW MUCH SHE WANTS THEM TO BE SAFE. SO MUCH SHE EVEN RISKS HER OWN LIFE AND SAFETY.
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SO MUCH SHE WOULD SCHEME AND LIE TO KEEP THESE TWO SAFE. (SHE FCKIN!!!! DRAPED HER OWN COAT OVER HIM I'M!!! KDSNVKJSDVNKJSD *SCREAMS AT TOP LUNG CAPACITY* SHE FREAKING MADE AMURO PROMISED NOT TO HARM RAN AND SHINICHI, I'M GOING BONKERS!!!)
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SO MUCH SHE WOULD EVEN TURN A GUN AGAINST ANOTHER BO MEMBER, WOULDN'T LET ANYONE ENDANGER THEM NOT EVEN HERSELF.
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I'M! SCREAMING!! Love me a morally grey woman with her own agenda.
NOT ONLY THAT BUT SHE WOULD ALSO HELP THEM OUT? HER COVERING FOR THIS GReMLIn i'M DEAD, The WInK-
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BUT SHE ALSO WOULD DO THIS:
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(THE FREAKING GIRLY RUN SHE DOES AND THE LITTLE HEART, SHE KNOWS SHE'S OPENLY BEING A LIL SHIT TO SHINICHI AND I'M THRIVING-)
THEY ARE HER TREASURES YOUR HONOUR!!!
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Each and every interaction with them has me IN ABSOLUTE HYSTERICS, MAKING ME GO CRAZY. For closing this section, I leave you with a (bad quality) gif I made (in a rush) because this part in the anime MAKES ME LOSE IT EVERY TIME. THE SLOW MOTION, THE WAY HE HOLDS HIM BY THE HANDS AND GENTLE WAY SHE SETS SHINICHI DOWN, I CANNOT.
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⊱✿⊰
III. Hattori Heiji - Tooyama Kazuha - Mouri Ran - Kudou Shinichi/Edogawa Conan
THE OSAKA DUO (AKA FIRECRACKER PAIR) and the Tokyoites (AKA THE BIGGEST HEIZUHA SUPPORTERS OUT THERE)
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I'll be honest, at first I planned to include only Kazuha & Heiji in this but then I started looking for scenes in the manga and got obliterated by my love for the 4 of them. (And yes, I know I already did Heiji & Shinichi in the previous ask, I love them, sue me. Also, i wanted to count "Not dating but married nonetheless" for Heizuha BC THEY ARE, but this ended up as a 4 character thing so. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
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To make it short: I FREAKING ADORE THEM.
In more detail: Heiji-Kazuha AND Shinichi-Ran both come in sets, DO NOT SEPARATE THEM. Then you put them all together THEY MAKE A WHOLE SET, A UNIT, A SQUAD.
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But also there are different combinations: The Detectives And Cursed Bad Luck Duo, The Superstitious Girl Duo, The Not Dating But Married Couple, THE DATING HUSBAND AND WIFE DUO, THE SEPARATE TRIO COMBOS. *RIPS OF CLOTHES AND ROARS* ALL SO VERY GOOD.
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THEY ARE JUST SO PRECIOUS TO ME, and they are just So- *CLENCHES FIST* THE BACK AND FORTH TEASING IN ALL KINDS OF COMBINATIONS, THE RUNNING INSIDE JOKE MOMENTS OF KAZUHA SAYING SHINICHI SOLVES CASES FASTER THAN HEIJI (TO HEIJI'S ETERNAL ANNOYANCE), OR HOW THE GIRLS THINK HEIJI AND SHINICHI/CONAN ARE LIKE BROTHERS-
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BUT ALSO BEING A WITNESS TO ALL THE WEIRD CONAN-THINGS, OR HOW THE BOYS BOND OVER THEIR LOVE FOR THEIR GIRLS AND THE GIRLS BONDING OVER THEIR LOVE FOR THEIR BOYS, AND BEING THE BIGGEST SUPPORTERS OF EACH OTHER'S HAPPINESS (CONFESSING FEELINGS TO THEIR BELOVEDS).
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MY BI ICON KAZUHA, NOT TO MENTION RAN'S CONFESSION IN KANSAI-BEN I'M FERAL, THESE GIRLS LOVE AND CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER (and the boys too, but more on that later) SO DEEPLY, IT'S ENDEARING.
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RAN LITERALLY, ON HER SECOND MEETING WITH KAZUHA, NOT ONLY SEEING SHE IS UPSET, BUT ALSO GOING OUT OF HER WAY TO CHEER HER UP I'M!!! BEST GIRL!!! TRULY AN ANGEL!!! (Ya really are a nice girl, Ran, I CONCUR.)
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THEN OF COURSE WE CANNOT NOT MENTION THE OSAKAN DUO. THEY ARE SO COMFORTABLE AROUND EACH OTHER, it's one of my favourite things, so UNABASHED WITH EACH OTHER IN WAY. They are (not dating BUT) MARRIED YOUR HONOUR, they really are like an old married couple.
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Honestly, I Just keep THINKING of them all BECAUSE THEY ARE SO DEAR, I'M SCREAMING-
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Also, it's so rarely mentioned but (because there is just so little of it in canon WHICH IS A CRIME, GET ON THE CASE BOYS) SHINICHI/CONAN-KAZUHA IS ESPECIALLY PRECIOUS TO ME, they have such great potential. Every time I SEE THEM INTERACT EVEN FOR A SECOND I GO APESHIT, ABSOLUTELY BONKERS. There is just something about Shinichi calling her "Kazuha" and "Kazuha-chan", the possibility of them BONDING OVER THEIR BELOVEDS AND YEARS OF PINING (because both Heiji and Ran can so oblivious it's endearing) but also bonding over HOW STUPID HEIJI IS AT TIMES, but also how much they both care for him and Ran. My dream is to see Kazuha make/get Shinichi a protective charm (let's be honest, hE NEEDS IT, and Heiji's seems to be sorta effective). There is a parallel there (now only if I could find the post for it). Also Shinichi not only being OK with Kazuha picking him up (LETTING HER!!!) BUT ALSO BEING FINE WITH KAZUHA HOLDING HIM!!! (FOR A WHOLE CONVERSATION!!!)
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Also, ShinRan sharing that braincell.
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I hope you enjoyed this wild rambling ride, dear Anon, and thank you for asking, I HAD SO MUCH FUN!!! May you have a blessed day, darling!
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 year ago
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The indescribable tension between an overworked and underpaid smut writer, and his biggest fan hater.
(for @frummpets)
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somnimagus · 1 year ago
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My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.
[id in alt text]
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aphoenixgurl · 2 days ago
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Mary loved their embrace and the kiss that they had shared all too much. She could feel every tremble in Xiomara's body and it made her want to to continue and see whatever little reactions she could cause in the young woman. It truly scared her how much she wanted this to, which was all the more reason what she had to force herself to stop at first.
Xio's confession took her by surprise making Mary bite her lip while staring into her beautiful eyes. More than anything, she wanted to make the young woman happy, but she never expected this. The pleas made her wrap both arms around Xio for a tight hug and rock them both gently side to side.
"Thank you, sweetie. I... I need you to know I would have never done anything to hurt you or make you uncomfortable," she explained as if feeling guilty, "But when I said I've missed being with women... I think it has been because of you. I love you so much and you're so beautiful that I haven't been able to stop myself from thinking that I wished I was your age and we could have a chance. I never imagined that you felt something for me, too."
Her head puled back to look into Xo's eyes and brush her hair back for an instant before kissing her again. All the love in her heart that she had been saving for another woman was poured into her lips, their tongues meeting again to confess how they felt with every little movement and touch. It felt all too natural now, lowering her guard enough to allow both hands to roam Xo's curves, finally caressing her perky young breast through that tantalizing dress.
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Seconds after their lips met, Xo realized what she'd done and froze for moment, fully expecting to be pushed away and scolded. Instead, she was more than pleasantly surprised when Mary returned the kiss. Without a second thought, she melted into her touch.
Her lips eagerly parted for her stepmom's tongue, letting her own tongue brush against Mary's, inviting her deeper in. Mary's hands seemed to leave trails of heat in their wake, setting Xiomara's tingling skin aflame. The contact and the kiss was more than she could have hoped for, and it wasn't long before it sent more of her slick arousal dropping down her thighs. The wetness practically coated her upper inner thighs, thankfully still covered by the skirt of her dress.
Her back hit the counter, and she couldn't restraint the needy moan that escaped her. Xo all by whimpered when Mary's hand still just below her chest. Losing the kiss just about made her whine however.
"No!" She nearly yelled, then remembering her father was asleep in the bedroom. She regulated her volume, sliding her hands into Mary's hair, keeping her close. "It's not pity! I've been wanting to do that forever. I have thought you're hot since I met you. I want this. I want you." She insisted, voice now quieter and breathy.
"Please? I need you, Mommy." She whispered, leaning in and nuzzling her nose against Mary's jaw and cheek.
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chrisbangs · 1 year ago
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231003 ♡ Happy Birthday Bang Chan!
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