#trial and error bby

[bunnyshot]

Amber is still trying to avoid Jean for fear of having the talk(tm) where she cries and begs that she’s HAD the talk before adulthood and doesn’t need one now she knows enough (she hasn’t had any talk her parents are dead && her grandfather did not go into that awkward territory with her before he disappeared homegirl just learn by the occasional word of mouth ... MAYBE SHE NEEDS THIS TALK OFFICALLY-) 

[anxiousnerdwritings]

For shapeshifter! Reader, how would batfam prevent them from sneaking out after they discover their powers? I image they probably wouldn’t want them sneaking out, but they might have to get creative with the restraints

The Batfamily don’t want their darling sneaking out whatsoever, especially when it’s by themself, so there will certainly be preventative measures put in place immediately. It’ll start out will small things, the family are focusing more on watching their darling and learning their patterns and where/how exactly they are getting out before they completely take action.

The first thing happening is a tracker being placed on the Reader without their knowledge. It’ll be trial and error for the family to realize the best way to keep the tracker on their darling before they decide that the best option is to drug their darling and inject them with an imbedded tracker so that they can’t easily get rid of it. And you know damn well that when Shapeshifter!Reader gets back and sneaks into their room again after having the tracker on and being watched/followed by the whole family, Bruce is sitting on their bed or something like that and is waiting for them like a disgruntled, disappointed dad about to grill the shit out of his bby. Not only that but then to have all the rest of the batfamily popping in too and looking just as disappointed and disgruntled as Bruce is just furthers the ‘I’m so fucked’ mantra going through their darling’s head.

After that is when the family starts taking bigger steps to keeping their darling from sneaking out and away from them. I can’t help but imagine the batfamily all putting the Reader to bed and saying their good nights and sweet dreams, only then for Bruce to pull out a little remote that he proceeds to use that puts the whole manor in fucking lockdown to keep their bby from sneaking out, especially while the family is on patrol. Also, there’s a good chance that the Reader wouldn’t be allowed to have a room to themself anymore. It’ll most definitely be a scheduled rotation but someone will be staying in the Reader’s room with them from then on. Sometimes it may even be the whole family having a slumber party in the Reader’s room, not only to keep a watchful eye on the Reader and ensure they don’t leave durning the night, but also to get to spend some much more needed time with their precious darling.

I wouldn’t put it past any of the batfamily members to make it a nightly thing to drug their darling before bed just to ensure they don’t go anywhere or to even give them the chance to try and figure a way out. Sure the family all have their reservations about some of the measures they’re taking but at the end of the day it’s for their darling’s sake (at least that’s what they keep telling themselves and each other) and that’s all they need to keep doing what they’re doing.

None of this goes without Selina’s notice though, of course it doesn’t. She notices right away when her bby hasn’t come for their usual visit. It’s something like this that makes her so thankful that she did put her own tracker on the Reader to be able to find them if she had to and to think she almost didn’t go through with it. Selina is aware of the Reader’s situation with the Batfamily. She doesn’t agree with a lot of what the family is doing or how they’re going about doing things but she can understand to a degree of what the family is trying to do. She’s tried to talk to Bruce and a few other Batfamily members to try and get through to them, to get them to ease up on the Reader and be more understanding of their wants, especially for more freedom, but it never seems to do anything. Honestly, it just became even more of a reason why Selina wanted to be someone for the Reader to feel they could escape to. And now with the more extreme measures the family are taking, Selina feels all the more inclined to step in than she had before. She can’t let this slide, not when they’re going above and beyond to force their darling to stay put.

[merbear25]

Mousefood

If given the choice, would you rather risk everything to save your community or just watch it burn? A horrendous outbreak quickly claimed the lives of many, but you were one of the few who stuck around in hopes of finding a cure. You knew of another, a scientist by the name of Caesar, who chose to stay and even offered his assistance. Although he didn't exactly come across as the trustworthy type, you were in desperate need of his help. However, his intentions weren't what they seemed.

CW: Plague AU, mentions of infections, some gore, death, fem!reader (envisioned to be late 20s+)

a/n: I just really wanted to write something for myself after the last follower event! Of course, it's got to be with Caesar. I'd like to thank @escenariosinfumables and @lady-of-endless for helping aid my obsession with him and @bby-deerling for wanting to be tagged in whatever this is. I poured my heart and soul into this, and it is by far my favorite thing I’ve written.

Curiosity drew many to its flame. However, most were engulfed by the intensity it came with, becoming nothing more than ash. With its light leading the way, the shadows danced upon the holder of the candle, calling out to what lurked in the dark. In spite of the threat of the unknown closing in, it was here that the surface of understanding our world was scratched.

Embracing the threat this reality had to offer was what led to great discoveries, for those mysteries which were just out of reach would eventually be unearthed by those most deserving. When those dark corners drew nearer and nearer, a whetted appetite opened a can of an array of worms ready to burrow into the crevices below.

The deeper they went, the more disarray was left spreading through the soil and infecting the roots of once healthy plants. Although it was a shame to watch such beauty in the world wilt away, success could never be accomplished without noble sacrifices.

There was still so much to uncover in our world, most of which was in plain sight. However, inquisitiveness could be a dangerous trait, especially when paired with an overactive imagination. 

It began with a few questions he asked himself, “How much would the human body be able to endure?”, “Is such a rise in temperature enough for the disease to survive?”, “How long could it live on surfaces?” 

A new world was flourishing in the petri dish on his desk; aeromonas hydrophila had earned a special place in his heart, as it had the most promising future amongst the others. In spite of the potential for such a calamitous future to unfold, there were countless efforts still to be made: trial and error was always a must no matter how promising something appeared to be.

Ordering one of his many lackeys to fetch something from off of his desk, he should have known they’d be negligent enough to disturb the slumbering plague. An important life lesson was about to go underway: the henchman chose to enter his master’s lab without any protective gear, knowing full well the dangers that came with it.

To make matters worse for himself, he had various hangnails. Other than those stinging for some time, they also left him vulnerable to infection, to which he would only have himself to blame.

While sorting through the scattered papers, he failed to catch a glimpse of the terror waiting to be uncaged, knocking into it ever so slightly. Despite the fact that the lid was on, a small droplet seeped through the crack when his hand collided with it. The splash of strange substance caused him little to no worry, simply brushing it off on his shirt while also spreading it across his open-sore hand.

Shortly after retrieving what Caesar had asked for, the lackey continued his streak of recklessness, unknowingly allowing the bacteria free realestate to other vacant lots on his person: rubbing his eyes, eating with his hands, and picking his nose when he thought no one was looking.

With the bacteria being spoiled for choice, it took full advantage of its new residence, burrowing its way deeper within the tissue, spreading misery to all the corners of the host. It wasn’t long before the worker started complaining: feeling hot and feverish were coupled with beads of sweat over his body. Irritation was left unconcealed as he berated his goon for everything under the sun before begrudgingly letting him go just to rid himself of the constant belly aching.

With annoyance still fresh, he took to sorting out some paperwork. What little decrease in anger was disregarded when faced with many of his notes scattered about his desk. Through the fits of cursing, his hands frantically collected his work. When uncovering the little friend he’d been growing, he was intrigued.

Having a closer look at his workstation, he noticed the lid on the petri dish was slightly ajar. Upon further examination, he saw that the contents within it had been disturbed. Putting two and two together wasn't difficult. It was obvious that the buffoon who'd just left was the cause of this. Despite his persistent irritation, perhaps this was one of life's happy accidents. Instead of hauling that henchman back, he thought it'd be better to see how his modifications played out when given free reign on that lamb―raising it for slaughter.

Putting on his face before leaving the room, the painted smile greeted the acquired host. “How are you feeling?”

His golden eyes scanned the subject, noting the obvious sickly complexion. “Just really hot…like I'm burning alive.” Sweat had been beading on his brow, now trickling down his clammy skin.

“Anything else?”

“No, just nauseous I guess.”

Guessing the disease was spreading much more quickly than originally anticipated, he hummed to himself to portray a sense of thoughtful consideration. “It's such a pity to have to ask this of you and the others, but seeing as supplies are low and there aren't many hands to even gather them, you'll have to journey into town.”

Faith in their master and trust in the process had become second nature to his men, making them malleable to his liking. They hung on each of his words as though they were holy scripture, sacrificing themselves by falling in line with his agenda.

“Now, be sure you don't come back until you've got everything on this list, all right? We can't afford to waste time on nonsensical runs.”

Wishing them luck while they disappeared behind the thick trees, an eye roll queued behind an exasperated groan. “What have I done to be cursed with the presence of such idiocy?”

Stumbling into the town below, the faint glow of the pharmacy’s sign led them there with ease. Upon entry, however, the sight of the ill one was cause for alarm. Gasping at the state of him, they were bombarded with questions, none of which they had the answers to.

“Well, can you at least tell us where you came from?”

“Just up the hill. We were low on supplies and were sent for them.”

“He shouldn't be traveling anywhere. He needs to see a doctor. Come, we'll help you bring him there.”

Laying down on the cot brought no relief to the increasing pain. The doctors who were called to tend to him were baffled when their hypotheses failed again and again.

Since this illness was proving to be unruly, they were left no choice but to quarantine the others, for they too were showing questionable symptoms.

After an agonizing night, the morning fared no better. Rivers of crimson secreted, staining their faces, sweat that soaked through any and all fabric and was hot to the touch: the medical professionals were regrettably repulsed by them.

However, once members of the staff complained about feeling unwell, repulsion shifted into panic. Having sent the unknowing hosts to town, the residents fell victim to their naivety in their master.

It wasn't long before the medicine they had ran out. Even if the treatment only worked to dull the intensity of the pain, it did nothing in terms of curing them. 

Patient zero started suffering from convulsions, brain swelling, and eventually organ failure—that was what they told the townsfolk to stifle any more chaos. In reality, his and the others’ bodies were deteriorating, earning the disease the name the Grim Death.

Without so much as a goodbye, those who only bore the title of doctor but lacked the compassion fled to save their own hide.

However, there was one who, against the odds, chose to stay in hopes of curing those suffering. With a sizable amount of knowledge, you persevered, in spite of knowing your own limitations. You needed someone to help you. Asking around, there was talk of a scientist who was thought to be mad.

Not being spoiled for choice, you ventured up the hill to him. Through all the weeds out front and the branches hanging overhead, a sinister aura loomed. Even with suspicions and doubts nagging at you to turn back, you were determined to see this through.

Dropping the heavy door knocker on the wooden surface, the echos sounding from within could be heard from the other side, leaving goosebumps along your skin.

The door suddenly cracked open, leaving a mere sliver for you to meet the man who'd built an unfavorable reputation for himself.

"Who are you?" His tone was flat as he stared you down.

"(Y/n). I'm from town, a doctor just trying to make sense of all this." When he didn't say anything, you continued, "I was told that you may have the resources and expertise to help me put an end to this." With a hopeful look in your eyes, you awaited his confirmation.

Huffing slightly at the inconvenience of you being there, he was still an opportunist; desperation encompassed you, practically offering yourself up on a silver platter. He would be able to ring you dry of all your potential.

"I have my ways." Looking you up and down, as if sizing up your worth, he stated, "Come in, and we can start chipping away at this iceberg of a predicament."

Jarring the door enough for you to slip through, he then promptly slammed it shut. Finding yourself in the center of the front entry, the surroundings lurched out at you: grand staircases on either side, a chandelier with candles that had been waned to near stubs, and vines that crept along the walls, entangling with some fresh cobwebs. It was blatantly obvious that he was living alone and by the looks of it he had been for a long time.

When you turned to face him, his eyes were fixated on you, trying to sort out if that sap story about wanting to save the town was just some ploy.

Being the one to break the silence, you asked what news of what was happening in town managed to reach him. Not wanting to assume he didn't know anything or barely anything, you trusted your question was inviting enough.

Tilting his head up slightly, his gaze followed down his nose, "But of course I know of the happenings shaking up that town. News of such horrors travels quickly as I'm sure you could guess."

Just as your train of thought was leaving the station, he stopped you, "Before you start sharing your experience, why don't we take it to the next room. I'm sure such riveting stories are ones I ought to be sitting down for."

He led you into the parlor, offering you a seat on the sofa near the dying embers in the fireplace. The armchair adjacent to you was occupied by him. "Go on now, my dear." He gestured with a smile upon his pale face.

"Well, if you've heard of the matters, then I'm sure you can understand the severity." He nodded, showing his acknowledgement. "Whatever medicine we had only just hardly helped the symptoms and quickly ran out. I'm sure it's possible to find a cure—in fact I know it is—though I can't create it on my own." Owning up to your own limitations fileted you, displaying all your vulnerabilities to this man you'd just met.

Waving his hand as if to fan off the doubts swarming the room, his voice was gentle, "Rest assured, my dear, for there is no illness out there that can best me."

"S-so does that mean you'll help? Or rather I'll help you?" You instantly humbled yourself, since you could feel you were in the presence of genius.

Grinning at your faux pas, he confirmed, "Yes, it does."

While relief casted itself on your expression, he was quick to clip the wings carrying optimism, "However, there are some rules you must abide by if we're going to be tackling this outbreak together."

When you voiced your compliance, he listed off the rules, "Firstly, whatever work we do must be kept confidential. Secondly, any..." he carefully crafted his next demands, "requests I make must not be met with resistance. Have faith and trust the process. Thirdly, seeing as conditions in town are worsening, I think it's best for you to stay here." Getting up from his chair, he motioned towards the fireplace, the logs wearing a faint glow.

Not wanting to rock the boat, you couldn't exactly let your surprise at the last rule slip, "I hope I don't come across as ungrateful saying this, but would it really be necessary to have me stay here?"

"Hm? So you'd prefer to be surrounded by the sick, risking infection yourself?" Your eyes falling to your hands said it all. "Believe me, dear, you'll be able to do more for them helping me here than you ever would stuck there with them."

Not having much grounds to argue with the conditions, you threw caution to the wind in dreaming of a future for those being affected. "I'm willing to do what it takes to help those in need."

Looking up at him, the sly grin stretching across his wasn't even attempted to be concealed. "Excellent. Such a noble display of self-sacrifice will not go unnoticed, I can assure you."

There was a clear shift in your demeanor; acting quickly, he impaled a pitchfork in your stream of consciousness, giving you the illusion of being able to see beyond all the while still placing you behind bars.

"Please," his voice soft and welcoming, "consider this arrangement as simply temporary and me as your guide to end all of this mess."

Fragmented skepticism was still scattered throughout your mind, yet the glimmers of hope shined through. The shadows of doubt were overlooked by your want to reinstate normalcy, leading you astray from sound judgment. With your confidence in this alliance still shaky, you were given no choice but to put your faith in this man.

Your submission was clear. As he leaned down to your eye level, he cocked his head in interest. "Shall I show you around then?" While being led out of the room, the slight glow from under the wood finally died out.

Listening to him share the history of his home was awe-inspiring. Each story that passed his lips was captivating, and each room appeared to come alive as he spoke about them. There was a question itching at you, though. With him rambling on about how vast and rich everything about this place was, you attempted a polite interruption.

"This is quite an impressive home with an undeniably spellbounding past, but if you don't mind me asking, where exactly do you work?"

“Ah, let me show you.”

Making your way out back and ducking under the overgrown tree limbs, he brought you to the bottom of a cliff. Grinning at your lingering disorientated state from the twists and turns he’d been throwing at you, he patted the tall wall of earth.

“This leads to a world many other scientists and doctors could only dream of.” With a devilish glint in his eyes, he kept them locked on you while the PIN pad appeared. Such a subtlety of awe shown on your gentle face caused a few soft chuckles to escape him. You were, after all, just moments away from laying eyes on the most astounding lab known to man.

The earth parted, allowing the both of you access to a world beyond your wildest dreams. A spiraling staircase led to the cluttered, yet organized workspace. Bookcases lined the tall walls, filled with knowledge ranging from a multitude of scientific subjects to history. With ceilings climbing high, the feeling of being a mere insect was hard to shake.

Throwing his hands in the air, he gave an enthusiastic spin, “This is where all of the world’s greatest mysteries are unveiled.” Leering over his shoulder, he leaned down, his voice husky from the thrill of sharing his brilliance with someone. “The whispers in the dark are brought to light in this very room.”

Shuddering from the overly familiar closeness, his words were laced in a toxin, alluding to the lengths at which he went to obtain such intelligence. 

“This, however, is simply my study.” Stretching back to his full height, he offered to show you his lab. “Surely you didn’t come all this way just to see this. Let’s continue the grand tour.”

The elongated corridor gave the illusion of stretching further and further. Once finally reaching the end, he flung open the door. “Ladies first,” he grinned.

When entering, he slapped his open palm against the switch on the wall, causing you to jump as the lights above illuminated the laboratory. A laugh rose from him, which left butterflies swarming in the pit of your stomach.

Brushing past you, he gestured to the vials of various substances, beakers, and the well-sorted notes and binders, all of which kept his brilliance cataloged. “This is where the magic happens, my dear.”

Fidgeting with your loose fabric, assuming that you were granted permission to look around seemed foolish, so instead, you peered around the room from your personal bubble.

Eyeing you, he saw you as a rather curious thing, something for him to pick apart. “Tell me, what do you specialize in?”

“Immunology,” holding your head high and your stare firm.

“Oh? Well, how lucky I am to have such gifted hands to aid me.” Humming at the sight of confidence radiating through you, he questioned further, “And how long have you had to wield such expertise?”

“I’ve only just finished medical school.” Despite knowing how that sounded—a rookie with only the theories but none of the practice—you refused to allow the self-assurance in your capabilities to budge.

“Then what a great learning experience this will be for you.”

Suspecting a mocking tone, deflection came to your defense, “Yes, it’ll look great on my resume.”

What seemed like a spec of genuineness was layered in his laughter. “That’s the spirit!”

A slight tug at the corner of your mouth was shown, giving your nerves a bit of a break. Looking around the room once more, your eagerness to have a glimpse into his mind made it hard to stay still. Risking a glance, your curiosity couldn’t be held back, “May I have a look around?”

He cocked an eyebrow and smirked, “Sure, after all we’ll be spending many moons in here together.”

Nodding at his statement, you were mindful of your step and distance from his work, not even daring to breathe on them in the wrong way.

Pride bubbled inside him, while he watched you soaking in many of his past feats. Perhaps your lack of experience wouldn’t hinder you from appreciating some of the finer tastes life had to offer—or rather, he had to offer.

“What condition were the first patients in when you left?”

“Oh, they— ” nightmarish images of their decaying bodies flashed in your mind, “their conditions were critical. Their organs were…deteriorating, as if acid had been poured on them.” Choking back the tears from the horrors you witnessed, you would never be able to forget their pain filled screams for help.

In spite of the fact he was elated at the progress the creature was making in such a short amount of time, such celebration wouldn’t fare well for him in the long run. “How awful! Those poor souls.” Placing a hand on his chest, he signaled his condolences for the terror you must’ve been subjected to.

Seeing the grief on your face made you easy pickings. “Well, don’t you worry, we’ll start our practices first thing in the morning.”

“In the morning? Why not now?” There was a clear sense of urgency in what you’d just told him, so you couldn’t wrap your head around why anyone would choose to wait.

“Now, now, calm yourself. It’s already nightfall and we’ll need our strength if we’re to be of any use to them. Plus, there are a few plants in the area we can test with, and I’m sure you’ll agree that they’ll be much easier to find in broad daylight. Hm?”

His words flowed like cream and his tone felt like velvet, yet there was just something off about him that you just couldn’t put your finger on. However, you were in no position to question his advice. He was, of course, much more experienced than you, but you began to wonder that with experience came a lack of empathy.

“You’re right,” you admitted.

“Oh, darling, of course I am! Don’t get carried away by the excitement.” He moved to your side, his presence exuding every ounce of authority over you. Placing his hand gently on your shoulder, he leaned down, popping your personal bubble. “Trust me when I say you’ll only get burned.”

A deep red burned your ears, when he pulled away. As you hesitantly looked up at him, his unnerving grin and piercing dead eyes aroused a fear in you that hadn’t yet been realized. An involuntary nod was all you could muster in that moment.

Sucking in a sharp inhale, he tilted his head while making a suggestion, “Perhaps it wouldn’t hurt to have a quick read, though.”

Watching the color reappear on your face gave him more satisfaction than it should have. “Oh, that would be nice! I mean, I just want to feel like I’m doing something,” you reigned back on your joy at him changing his mind.

Sighing at your display, he covered the drop of irritation skillfully, “Completely understandable. And well, you are a doctor, aren’t you?”

Being reminded of all those who were too cowardly to stay and help, you thought it’d be best that you not unleash all of your broodiness. Shaking off the ones who’d failed those folk, you were open to whatever knowledge you may gain from Caesar. 

Having followed him back to the library, you observed as his finger traced along the spines. Lightly tapping one, he glanced back at you, “This one. It'll be a good start in finding which plants will be most suitable.”

You gladly took the book he offered you, mesmerized by the delicate pages which showed its age. Mindfully thumbing through the pages, there were a few that called out to you.

The enthusiasm radiating off of you came with warmth he hadn't felt in quite some time. Being surrounded by people who lacked any luster, any spark of light had taken a toll on his own pleasure in what he did. As you combed through each of the pages you bookmarked, he had a hunch you were going to be a rather entertaining guest.

Deciding you had your fill for the night, he guided you to the room you'd be staying in. Wishing you sweet dreams, the comfort of the pillow quickly pulled you into a deep slumber. While you slept heavily and went in and out of dreams that stirred the dread swirling in your heart, you were met with twinges of pain but still you did not awake till morning.

Jolting up in bed, you triggered the room to spin and your head to pound. Looking about the room, you'd hoped the last few days were just nightmares, weaving into what could be mistaken for reality, but to your dismay, you could never wake up from this.

Creaking the door open, you were given a dimly lit view down the corridor. Concentrating on each faint sound in the distance, you cautiously made your way down the stairs. Even though you two spent some time getting to know each other last night, he was still a stranger and you were under his roof, abiding by his rules. Crossing any boundaries would not be taken lightly, that much you could gather from him.

Peeping around the corner, the muffins plated on the kitchen counter caught your eye. With the strong winds of the outbreak pulling you every which way, the last meal you had felt like a distant memory. You drummed your fingers next to the aesthetically pleasing morsels, wishing that he'd come by so you could properly ask permission.

With the minutes ticking away, your thoughts wandered, leaving you to ponder his whereabouts. The muffins taunted you, but your hunger was off set by the discomfort of stuffing your face with treats that may or may not have been for you.

In a slight huff of annoyance, you got up to search for him, but before you could cross the threshold, he appeared at the end of the adjoining hall.

“Have to eat and run?” His playful tone carried over to you.

“N-no, actually, just run I suppose.”

While entering the room, his gaze immediately casted from you to the plated baked goods. “You're allowed to have one. If you'd like of course.”

There was something in the way he offered that churned your stomach, causing you to lose your appetite. “No, thank you. Maybe the current events have affected my hunger.”

Shrugging off your refusal, he added, “Later then. You'll have to eat at some point.”

“It's not that I don't appreciate the offer! It's just…,” you did your best to mask any unease, “I’d feel so much better if we made progress with our research. Could we please get started on it soon?”

Muffled giggles trailed out of him, “I don't mean to laugh, but have they any idea how lucky they are to have someone as determined as you fighting for them?”

The slight shift in your eyes was very telling. “They don't truly appreciate you, do they?” The rhetorical question pierced you deeper than you would've ever guessed.

“I'm willing to bet they never have,” lining his observations with incitement, he inched closer as if inviting you to bear your hatred for them.

“It doesn't matter whether they cared about me or not,” your vocal cords were already swelling from the anticipation of heartache, “What matters is doing the right thing.”

Snorting at your noble display, each moment with you was becoming more glaring that you were going to be tougher to sink his claws into. “Oh, I never tire of selflessness…comradery is truly endearing.” He didn't bother hiding his eye roll and sarcasm.

Disgust at his disinterest in the lives that were being lost boiled within. How can such a person exist?

He was clamping down on a nerve without an ounce of care. However, you couldn't let him get to you. You had to push through these ‘temporary conditions’, then afterwards you'd rid yourself of him. 

“I think it'd be best if we focus on the task at hand.” Keeping your eyes locked on his, your perseverance remained unwavering.

Tilting his head from side to side, he hummed in agreement, “What a great idea.”

Gathering the notes the two of you compiled last night, the plants for which you'd forage had been decided on. Venturing outside to collect them, the peace and quiet found in nature could never be matched. 

Distancing yourself from Caesar gave you time to reflect; going back to your repulsions, there must be a deeper issue at hand, one of which you were not equipped to deal with. In spite of all this, a shred of pity for the man crawled out from behind the corners of your mind. Being alone for who knew how long must carry a lot of weight. Then posed the question as to why he was alone: by choice or chased away? 

Even if there was evil displayed in this world, you held out hope that most people had good in them—including him. When you returned with the ingredients, you challenged yourself to look at him through a new lens and wanted to give him the chance that perhaps many others hadn't.

“Would you care to observe, (y/n)?”

“Yes, I would.” Taking your place next to him, you mentally took note of each movement he made, soaking in the valuable skills he willingly shared with you.

At one point when you needed to make one of your runs to his library to double check something, you caught yourself; you were thoroughly enjoying this time with him, to which shame and guilt were dragged behind. What gull you had to be having fun in the midst of a new plague.

Unbeknownst to you, the aura you carried was thick with self-loathing. Pushing through the tasks at hand, those intrusive thoughts twisted their persistence, whispering in your ear: how wretched you are, how lowly of a doctor you must be to find pleasure in this. Can't you hear their cries? They're voices are being carried to you on the back of the wind that's rustling those leaves. 

You caught stray glares here and there. “Pull yourself together,” you scrutinized yourself. The inner monologue, however, was snowballing into a one-sided argument, leaving you in an echo chamber.

Stretching back in his chair, he sighed, “What's happened?”

Rapid blinks and a puzzled look coupled as you stared at him. A faint ‘Hm?’ was all that followed.

His golden eyes squinted at you, observing you just as he was doing with the samples. Pointing out the error you were about to make, he reiterated, this time in an irked tone.

“Nothing.” Your voice was dismissive.

“You know, most people are such dreadful liars and you're no exception.”

Unwilling to hold your tongue, you informed him of the joy you felt in pushing forth towards a discovery.

“So then why are you sulking?”

“Because I can't help but feel bad for enjoying the process of finding a cure.”

Rubbing his eyes, there was little patience he had for your endless amount of compassion. “The world doesn't stop just because there's a new disease. Life goes on, so why let it stop you from enjoying it?”

Crossing your arms at his advice, deep down you knew he was right and you hated it.

“If you became a doctor to save everyone, then you're in for a rude awakening, my dear.”

“I know I can't save everyone!”

“Then stop acting like you can! I mean, you've wasted so much time fretting over how sorry you feel about everything and anything and for what? Hm? Many have died and many more will quickly follow, so stop letting that bleeding heart of yours get in the way of progress.”

A loathing festered inside you towards him but more yourself. Regaining your composure and any shred of dignity, you excused yourself to bury your nose in research.

Cracking open a few books and setting them around you, the urge to wallow in your own self pity was warded off. Despite the vile coating still lingering in your mouth, his view on the world draped over you. 

Harsh words gnawing at your conscience, seeping through the newly formed cracks. Self loathing swelled in knowing he was right.

Carrying out further experiments on the plants you'd collected in silence was becoming more and more unpleasant. However, there was nothing you felt like you could say. Keeping your nose to the grindstone would be the simplest way to convey where your heart lay.

As the day drew to a close and the dread from earlier still hanging over you, going to bed without supper was an easy decision. Yet even with the exhaustion of the day weighing you down, rest served as no aid: tossing and turning, whining from pain, eyes that fluttered open but never pulling you awake. 

Waking to the dull gray that clouded your room, your rigid form staggered across your host's line of vision.

His legs carried him fast, circling around you like a vulture.

“Despite looking it, I'm not dead,” you croaked.

Chuckling at your spunk, he offered a solution, “I believe I may have something for you.”

Following him into the kitchen, you already assumed what he had planned. “It'd have to be one strong cup of coffee to liven me up.”

“No, no, none of that!” Clanking jars trying to reach for something, an ‘Ah-ha!’ sounded before showing you a small glass bottle with a few stray pills.

Displaying them proudly, he instructed you to take a blue one now and a yellow one before bed. “They'll help keep your mind in check.”

With a searing glare, it shifted from the bottle to him.

“Tsk, you know, you're really going to have to learn to trust me at some point.”

A swirl of guilt stirred in you.

“We are partners, aren’t we?” His grin was crooked while he jostled the pills, nabbing your attention in hopes of taking them.

“Yes…you're right.”

“Ah, those words are music to my ears.”

Huffing a half-hearted laugh, you popped the first pill.

“It shouldn't be long before you feel the effects. But, uh, please tell me when you feel better.” He turned to place some of the other containers up right.

“What's the rush? Are the plants going to disappear soon?”

Humming in slight amusement, he answered, “No, but I managed to come up with our first beta sample for a cure.” He glanced over his shoulder to witness the astonishment that would undoubtedly play on your face, keeping his gaze firm and analytical.

To no surprise, you were rattled with eagerness to put such a thing into action. “Really? That quickly? There's no way!”

“Oh, my dear, you have such little faith, but I can assure you that you're working with one of a kind.”

Stood there in awe, you couldn't believe he'd managed to create the first beta sample as quickly as he did. Your beams of gratitude fueled him in ways you'd only regret.

“Wait, so are you saying we can start testing it?”

“Well, it's not ideal to immediately start testing on patients, yet I'm afraid we have no other options.”

“That's true…they could have severe side effects.” When you hung your head at the thought, you missed his lips twisting into a grin.

He regained his composure before playing on your heart strings. “Oh, now don't you start worrying about that.” Cocking his head to the side, his intonation rose, “Aren't you hungry?”

“Well, no, but—”

“You haven't eaten since you got here. I'm starting to think you're snubbing my cooking,” he teased.

After finishing the meal, it dawned on you how your fatigue had completely disappeared. Clearing your throat caught his attention.

“Thank you very much for the meal, and I just noticed I'm feeling much better now.”

Clasping his hands together, he gave you a warm-hearted response, “That's wonderful! We need you to be in tip top shape if you're going into town.”

The assumption that you'd be the one carrying out the injections was obvious, but you would never protest anyway. Nodding at him, you confidently notified him that you were ready.

Talking through the correct dosage, you set out feeling sure in your abilities.

In spite of the fact it'd only been a day since you left, a few more people had fallen ill, and those you had fallen prior to it were in critical condition—the first unlucky few having already been pronounced dead.

Looking around, you saw a few nurses who'd stuck around, which brought you some relief. Informing the staff that you and Caesar were working to find an end to this, they felt as if they had no other option; they placed their faith in you.

Finding your way over to some cots, you did your best to soothe his cries before allowing him to be the first to test out this substance. You wished you could've done more, though it was morally questionable enough using one person as a guinea pig, let alone a fourth of the town.

Sticking around for an hour was more than long enough: the patient's heart rate spiked and his temperature climbed to life-threatening heights before convulsions ensued. Within the span of five minutes his body gave way, unable to fight any longer.

Even though you knew that the first sample wouldn't be the last, you'd still held out for something better. Trekking back up the hill, you gave Caesar the results.

He leaned back in his chair, mulling over what you'd bestowed on him and was then motivated with a new course of action.

Whatever doubt was circling around you was cleared once you saw that spark ignite. With new flares of motivation coursing through you, your hope remained unwavering.

“Oh, how careless of me. I nearly forgot to ask: do you feel…unwell at all?”

Reflecting on the lack of precautions you took in town, you had yet to feel any sign of illness creeping up. “I feel surprisingly fine, actually.”

He was seemingly pleased by your resilient immune system, leading the two of you to set forth on tweaking the faulty product.

With the moon high and the night still, your dark silhouettes trailed behind as you passed the entry’s threshold. Keeping to Caesar’s instructions, you swallowed the yellow pill before retiring to your room.

A faint ‘sweet dreams’ drifted after you while you were heading towards the staircase. Looking back to return his kindness, you wondered from where exactly he’d called out to you. Placing your hand on the railing, you called back to him but only deafness filled the rooms.

Not being keen on the idea of sticking around until he popped around a corner, you hurriedly got to your room. Laying in bed, praying that the pill he gave you would kick in soon, creaks seemed to sound off downstairs, in the rooms next to yours, at the foot of your bed, yet there was no one there to greet you when you shot up.

With sweat tickling your skin, you talked yourself down from the ledge; paranoia was sinking in, that’s all. There was nothing lurking in the corners of this house that you hadn’t already encountered. Laying your head back down on the pillow, the effects of the drug blanketed you in the warmth of its duvet.

Your eyes didn’t flutter open until the sun peeked from behind the clouds, leading a stray ray of light to cast on your sleeping form. Stirring under the sheets, a twinge of pain pricked at your shoulder. Rubbing it appeared to grace you with some ounce of relief, yet you had just about had it with these sleepless nights.

Thrashing the sheets off of your entangled legs, you found yourself downstairs without any true sense of purpose.

“Where are you off to in such a frenzy?”

Shooting your focus in the direction of the parlor, your host was relaxing on the sofa, wondering if you were showing some new kind of symptom for the plague.

“I don’t know what it is about this place, but I haven’t been able to have a proper night’s sleep since getting here.”

Frowning subtly, he asked, “Did the pill not help?”

“Well, no. I mean, it did but I woke up with this pain in my shoulder and—”

“It just sounds like you slept on it wrong,” he propped his arm against the arm rest to lean his cheek against it, smirking at you with complacency.

It was clear that you were finding it difficult to come up with a retort, which left yourself open to him.

“I think you’re going just a bit mad from everything that’s been happening.” His devilish grin danced upon his pale complexion.

“That’s not true! I just…I think I just need to feel like I’m contributing more? Maybe?” 

His lips fell into a mocking pout, queuing an eye roll from you. “Well, if you want to contribute a little more, why don’t you assist me in making more…unconventional changes to the samples.”

The perplexing connotation of what he meant by ‘unconventional’ made you involuntarily shake your head in an attempt to rid of any strife that could follow. “What do you mean by ‘unconventional’?”

“Well, you saw with your own eyes that the plague is still spreading with many dying such horrific deaths, right? If we’re to save as many as possible, risks must be taken.”

Placing your face in your palms, you sought for ways of self-soothing. You couldn’t think of a good enough argument against taking such measures. With that being said, your voice shook with doubt, “I don’t know. We could end up killing more people than if we stick to our current method.”

“Perhaps,” he tilted his head from side to side to rattle your concerns around, “or perhaps not and the risks could save many more lives than originally anticipated.” Leaning forward, his smug smile tore down the assurance you were clinging to, “That’s why they’re called risks, (y/n).”

With fragments of humiliation biting at your cheeks, you felt inclined to agree with him, “F-fine, we’ll do it your way.”

“Excellent! Let’s get started then, shall we?”

Sunlight was now transitioning into dusk and with the day being laid to rest, you had a new version of yesterday’s sample. Being fed words of affirmation on your irreplaceable addition to these experiments, you ventured down into town again with his promises of this being the end of it ringing loudly in your ears.

Finding out many more in town had started falling ill, you regrettably had to pass over some who were beyond saving; there was only so much power you had and repairing organs was not within it.

The effects this time were nearly immediate; the patient’s veins in their arm ran with a deep purple and began bulging through the skin. What was in the injected arm rushed throughout the rest of the body before giving you a chance to process what was unfolding.

Within moments of it spreading, sizzling could be heard emerging from the seizing test subject. As a nurse rushed to support the ill-fated soul, he pulled back in agony. The sweat accumulating at the base of her head was deteriorating the fabric.

What lasted mere moments would forever be etched into your mind, making sure to slash away beliefs you’d become anything more than an assistant in genocide.

Breaking your way into Caesar’s, you were overcome with fits of rage and sorrow. Searching high and low for him, you set your rampage on his lab. Choking out his name in a pained yelp, you marched down the hall to find an empty room. Disbelief clouded your better judgment as you charged into the room.

You jolted out of your skin upon the sound of the slamming door ricocheting against the four walls. Leering down at his prey, he promptly shoved you back in a chair. His grim appearance didn’t falter while his piercing eyes burrowed their way to your core, wrapping your frightened heart with barbed wire and ready to squeeze if necessary.

“I’m assuming everything went as planned?” His gaze was unwavering but the side of his mouth was being tugged at.

“What was the point in all of this? Why did you keep me here?” Tears were stinging you as they swelled up.

“Well, for one, you came here on your own free will and offered to help me. That was simply an opportunity I couldn’t refuse. And, uh, quick question before I continue, did you touch that last patient by chance?”

Scanning each scattered remnant of your mind, you recalled trying to keep them from injuring themselves, remembering the slight dampness on their shirt.

“And that, my dear, would be the main reason. You see, I thought it was strange that despite being in town during the outbreak, you had no symptoms, so I decided to send you there again with the “cure”. When you came back with no complaints, I just had to see this through.”

“How do you know for sure though? That I’m immune. I mean, couldn’t there be other factors th—”

Tilting his head and giving you a sympathetic smile, “I think you know how.”

Streams of panic cascaded down your cheeks. “So, what are you just going to keep me here as some rat?”

“No, of course not! Luckily for you, you’re quite an entertaining guest.” His eyes casted down slightly before finishing his speech, “I will be the kind host I always have been towards you and offer you knowledge you could only dream of, as long as you comply with each and every test I run on you.”

Peering into each other's souls, there were clashing morals and dreams for the future, with which yours was in no shape to fight against. “Fine.” You muttered.

“Oh, come now. Don’t get in such a mood. I wasn’t lying about everything. You do have something unique about you, hence why you won’t be bound to a cage. But remember that only a waning candle sheds its light around, so just make sure that light of yours stays lit.”

Straightening up to his full height again, dismay engulfed you while you awaited his next demands. For once in your life, you wished you’d been selfish and fled with the others.

[honey-minded-hivemind]

hi! Sorry for the late response. I am the one who asked about the Lovesick Au and brought up the omegaverse stuff, etc

if it isn’t already take I could be 🐇 anon!

I have a question. Are darling and bby, interchangeable? If not, what are the difference in roles? Do you find out your second gender when you are young?

I know you mentioned if you are a bby, you have to have a yandere or some sort of support system. With legality and etc, do you have to register, like legal paperwork? Just so many interesting ideas you have!

Darling and bby are interchangeable! Good eye! And you find out your second gender through trial and error, as you're born with those traits, but you don't really find out until you or others start to pick up on how you act and react to certain situations or scenarios. You do technically have to register as a bby/darling, which is why Reader hides what they are, so they don't have to have yanderes or possibly end up in a bad situation like darlings of thr past.

(Note: darlings/bbys are very rare, due to bad conditions they were kept in in years past, and how they also need love, which if neglected, they can die or get very ill)

I think Bunny Anon has been taken, but is there another animal you might like?

[t-lostinworlds]

hi lovely t!! congrats on ur lovely lil celly <3 how about “Wanna, like– I mean, if you’re not busy… We could get lunch? Or even just coffee if you don’t have a lot of time?” with stevie? i think you’d make it super cute! lots of love 🫶🏼

A/N: hi bby!! and thank u 🥺💗 i'm sorry this took a lil longer but i hope you like it @stevestummy !!!

steve harrington x fem!reader | wc: 1.3k | dustin's a menace & dorky/shy steve has a crush <3 | prompt in bold!

"This is borderline stalking."

"It's not stalking."

"Uh, borderline, it is," Dustin continued. "No normal or sane person goes to the same café two times a day, six times a week just to get a glimpse of some girl—"

"She's not some girl!"

"Oh shit, I'm sorry," Dustin gasped exaggeratedly, hand on his chest. "The girl you pathetically have an obvious crush on since this café opened—which would make that three weeks of stalking, by the way—and who you've been daydreaming to be your wife and the mother of your kids even though you haven't had a conversation apart from you telling her your same boring coffee order because you can't even ask her number let alone ask her out!"

"My coffee order is not boring," Steve grumbled, cheeks hot because Dustin's rant was still filled with truth…unfortunately.

All because of you.

You who made his heart race and his legs feel like jelly the first time you locked eyes. You who made his brain a jumbled mess, any coherent words lodged in his throat that he was only able to stutter out the first coffee order that came to mind—on more than one occasion that made you believe it was his usual—or else he would've made an even bigger fool of himself by simply staring at you.

Now, Steve wasn't a believer in love at first sight, but this sure did feel close enough.

"What happened to your game King Steve?"

He groaned, head thumping against the steering wheel. "Jesus, man, I get it—"

"Do you really think she's dumb enough to buy your excuses that you're just showing your friends the new café by bringing a different person, mostly kids not your age, every single time you come here?" Dustin babbled on. "You're so obvious about it already! So just ask her out!"

"What do you think I'm doing here!"

"Stalking!" Dustin argued which earned him a glare. "What? You're in your car, waiting for her to clock in because you want her to be the one to take your order instead of sitting inside like a normal person because you don't want to make it obvious that you are waiting for her only as if parking your car in front of the establishment for the past ten minutes without getting out isn't a giant red flag!"

Steve blinked. "What did I ever do to you?"

Dustin took a few deep breaths before smiling apologetically. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm just hungry, man, I haven't eaten lunch and I can smell their croissants every time the door opens."

Steve sighed, checking his watch.

"Come on. She should be here any minute now."

He internally cringed.

Maybe it did seem like he was stalking you when he even knew when you usually clocked in at certain times of the week.

In his defense, he'd been here plenty of times and it took some trial and error. Once he figured out roughly what your schedule was, it simply became a routine. He didn't go out of his way to steal your timetable and memorized it like some serial killer.

"Yeah, that's not creepy," Dustin grimaced. "Not creepy at all."

"I'll buy you anything you want if you don't embarrass me once we're inside," Steve gritted as he got out of the car. "If not, you're paying for yourself."

Dustin grinned toothily. "Deal."

•••

Steve's fingers were tapping on the wooden countertop as his eyes flickered between the menu and the 'employees only' door.

Your co-worker was behind the counter but didn't make an effort to go over to where they sat on the stools, much to Dustin's dismay. It was almost as if she knew that Steve wanted it to be you who'd take his order. 

His face warmed at the thought.

One that was definitely proven right when she shot him a knowing wink as she disappeared into the back and announced the end of her shift, his palms sweating as he watched the closed door in anticipation

Steve's heart jumped out of his chest and landed on the palm of your hand when you walked in.

Your eyes immediately found his, your irises twinkling and oh so fucking beautiful, smile sweet and warm that turned his brain to mush and all he could think about was: pretty pretty pretty.

Steve struggled to pick his jaw off the floor as he tried to return your grin without looking too much like a lovesick fool.

He knew he failed miserably at that.

Painfully and so downright obvious when he gawked at you, adoration filling his bones at the way you listened attentively to Dustin as he listed all the pastries he wanted to try like they were free—well, Steve supposed since he offered to pay for it all, it kind of was.

"Hey, Steve," you greeted cheerily, beaming. "The usual?"

"H-Hi! and yeah–yes…please," he said, smiling timidly, cheeks flushed, heart skipping when you giggled. It took Dustin kicking his foot to stop him from staring at you for a couple of minutes more. Gathering his sanity, his courage, his breath, his everything, he cleared his throat, "So, uh, do you wanna—uhm…burger? Maybe fries? Milkshakes too!"

"Steve, we don't serve those here," you chuckled, a twinkle of amusement in your eyes, tone teasing. "I thought you knew that already? Being a regular and all."

"No, no, no, it's uh, I meant—" Steve took a deep breath, and he swore he was having a fever because of how hot his body felt. "Wanna, like—I mean, if you’re not busy…We could get lunch? Or even just coffee if you don’t have a lot of time?"

"Well, I think I've had enough of coffee," you said, face scrunching in the most adorable of ways as you waved around you, the smell of freshly roasted beans strong in the air. "And it's way past lunch already."

Steve's heart fell into his stomach.

"Oh."

This was it. You were letting him down gently. You probably realized just how fucking creepy he'd been acting coming here all the time and—

"How about dinner this Friday night?"

"Yes!" he squeaked, his face burning red. He saw Dustin bury his face in his hands, muttering about how painful this was to watch. Steve ignored him as he turned back to you. "I mean, yeah, I'm free Friday…any time—for you, yeah."

"Cool," you giggled, and Steve swore if he'd hear that angelic sound one more time, he was going to ask you to marry him. You scribbled something on your notepad, your smile shy yet bright as you ripped the paper and handed it to him. "Here's my number. You can pick me up at seven."

"O-Okay," he choked out, cheeks hot and hurting as his grin grew wider. "I will."

Then, you leaned over the counter and kissed his cheek and Steve swore his heart stopped beating, brown eyes wide, jaw hanging, awestruck and dazed as you took his breath away. 

"It's a date," you whispered, fingers resting under his chin to close his mouth, winking before you made your way toward the door. He tried to fight off his frown when he immediately missed your touch, craving more. "I'll be back. I promised Dustin over here to get him one of the freshly baked croissants in the oven."

"Thanks, Y/N!" Dustin chuckled, waving excitedly.

"Fucking slap me," Steve breathed out once you were out of earshot, flinching when a palm hit the back of his head. He glared at his friend. "It was rhetorical!"

"I can't believe that worked," Dustin groaned. "That was so fucking bad."

Steve rolled his eyes, grinning smugly as he waved the paper you gave him. "I still got her number, didn't I?

"Technically, she gave it to you, idiot. You didn't do shit but ask for burgers and fries in a place that serves coffee and pastries. You've got nothing to be smug about."

Steve couldn't even find himself to be embarrassed about it. He was too high on life, his cheek still tingling from where your lips had touched his skin, your sweet scent still lingering in the air that nothing could ever bring him back down.

"I'm still getting the girl."

"Yeah, with your serial killer stalker strategy"

"Shut up."

⤷ t's february frolicking celebration

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[thetriumphantpanda]

Massive shout out to my cheese and crackers @undercoverpena for helping me put all of trial & error’s equal in the AO3 drafts 🧡 the most tedious of fic jobs and she did it like it was nothing. ILY bby!

[melonlthawne]

After I rest for a little I’m drawing Mel don n bby Bart. Also some personal jargon below the cut. It’s related to my interview with this LPN program

So as straight to the point as possible it’s an accelerated LPN program that’s a lot of tuition money and incredibly strict with zero room for missing a single class or clinical being late once etc. the administration representative was really blunt and said that I should think it over before I commit to it because they’re very strict and fast paced and if this isn’t something I think I can do or have conflict somehow then it’s not worth spending the money or time trying because they have like a trial 22 day period in the beginning of the program to make sure it’s the right fit before you pay for tuition you just have to pay for books / scrubs . So I have to think it over and will probably discuss it with my parents tonight and go from there . I can’t wait too long cause they only have a few spots in the program for the upcoming class but I shouldn’t rush into it either . I mean I think I can do it and it’s what I want to do but it will be REALLY hard. It’s just with every school I’ve applied to denying me I don’t see another option unless I want to give up being a nurse which I really don’t want to end up doing a job for the rest of my life that I hate just to not be homeless or something. So I have to think about it . I also wanna make sure I can figure out how to deal with my back pain because if I am going to continue feeling so garbage I don’t want to commit to something that will be so exhausting. Once I decide I’m supposed to call the lady and begin the application process

TLDR: it’s an accelerated program that is super strict and there is no room for error. I need to make sure I am able to do this before I spend all the money and time committing to it. So I have to think about it for a little and decide ASAP so I can begin the application process and still get a seat in the program

[thosetwofirefighters]

One Line, Any Fic

tagged by @the-likesofus because she's amazing!!! thank you bby, i'm so excited to participate in this one! <3 Rules: Pick any 10 of your fics, scroll somewhere to the midpoint, pick a line, and share it! Then tag 10 people hehe I used a random number generator to pick which fics to use because otherwise, I'd be here all night debating with myself lmao

At this point, Buck is just tired—tired of Snapchat, tired of Eddie and his avoidance, and tired of his stupid dick that still won’t calm down fully. —from The Trials and Errors of Taking Nudes on Snapchat (9-1-1)

Before waiting for an answer, Eddie moves to grab the drawing and remove it from the fridge, ignoring Chris’ protest that “Buck’s heart belongs on the fridge!” —from Misunderstood the Assignment (9-1-1)

Eddie is sitting on an armchair, Buck standing behind it to give him a shoulder massage, something they’d begun to do regularly once Eddie was healed enough from being shot. —from I Told You So (9-1-1)

It’s rare when Eddie decides to be melodramatic, and Hen seems to be riling him up, if the smirk on her face—and the glare on Eddie’s—is anything to go off of. —from How to Cure Boredom: Buckley Edition (9-1-1)

Jess watches them for a moment, a tight feeling forming in her chest at the sight—Lu seems motherly, she realizes, and there’s a look on her face that Jess has never seen before, something in her eyes that she’d never expect to see there. —from Glass (A League of Their Own)

His eyes flit between Buck and Eddie and the closet they just vacated, and he throws up his hands before saying something about keeping it in their pants. —from Can't Help Themselves (9-1-1)

Eddie feels relieved suddenly, and he hadn’t even realized he was stressing about it—about the fact that his best friend could have someone (who isn't him) to send intimate photos to. —from The Trials and Errors of Screenshotting Snapchats (9-1-1)

Chris leans up against the tree, giggling when his dads lie down next to each other, Buck pointing out some clouds and telling them wild stories about whatever he thinks they look like. —from The Most Mature Buckley-Diaz (9-1-1)

“Besides,” Eddie continues, “I also know that it’s a complete myth that holding off on coming does anything to sperm count or motility.” —from Problem Solved (9-1-1)

Buck has always been a romantic, has daydreamed about this—about his wedding—his whole life, but now that it’s here, it’s even better than he ever could’ve imagined. —from Cake on Our Fingers (9-1-1)

okay this was way too much fun!!! i lowkey want to include all of my fics now, but i'm practicing restraint! lol

everyone who i've tagged before or would tag who i know writes is probably already tagged, and i am too anxious rn to tag people who i haven't tagged before, so in lieu of tagging anyone, i am tagging whoever wants to do this too!! and asking y'all to let me know if you want to be tagged in stuff like this from me <3

[im-a-lil-bitch-boi]

im so sick and tired of my fuckin Ma actin like EVERYTHING wrong w this damn house is my fault. her moemys gone missin? oh its bc i set the money in front of her instead of handin it to her, even tho when i usually try n hand her the money she gesrures for me to set it down. or if she sent me money via Cashapp, she accuses me of not sendin her change back even tho i DO and even if i dont immediately do it(usually bc shes requested me to go to do smth for her after sendin me in this obnoxiously hot weather to the store for her bc she didnt feel like it) i send it to her when i notice. the kitchens constantly a mess bc my bby brother lets his friends in durin the middle of the night? my fault bc ofc im suposed to check the kitchen every. sinlge. fuckin. night. to male sure irs not dirty, even 1 piece of trash will get her wakin me up at 4 o FUCKIN clock in the mornin to "clean this mess up right NOW". the trash can outsides overflowin? ovbiously my fault bc ofc IM the one who tosses trash into it(im not. we dont have and indoor trashcan bc my siblings will let it sit there and not throw it out when needed. my Ma, one of my brothers(oldest of the boys, 2nd oldest of all of us), n i where the only ones to do it n she got fed up n told us to toss the trash into he bin outside). so OFC when she TAKES THE FUCKIN TRASH/RECYCLIN OUTVE THE BIN BC ITS OVERFLOWIN IVE GOTTA BE THE ONE TO PICK IT UP BC IVE MOBVIOUSLY MADE THE MESS bc apparently gettin no job interviews for like 3-5 months means that im a FUCKIN maid in this fuckin house.

she even has the nerve to call me lazy when she sends me to the store to buy her shit she quite honestly doesnt need on account of her shit health. she has the NERVE to order WEED in my name and make me pick it up(no clue Y shes doin it in my name when she HAS the money and an ID of her own to use her own fucjin identity. i dont even smoke weed bc it triggers my asthma, which she usually acts as if it wasnt real even tho ive been diagnosed fuckin twice). she has the audacity to complain about messes when she refuses to actually TEACH her younger kids(or in her words "MY kids" bc she doesnt TRULY consider me her own even tho im her 1st born child) how to actually properly clean and instead makes ME do it bc im actually good at cleanin(havin learn from a mix of trial and error from her and actually bein taught by my Gma(dads Ma) who actually probs hated me bc i would forget to wash my dishes as a 6-9 yr old).

im tired of bein accused of bein lazy, of bein used and abused, of bein unable to say no bc i cant afford to leave this gods forsaken house. i jus want to leave and be left alone. i literally used to fantasize about bein kidnapped and takin away, either by aliens or smth/someone else. im tired. im so tired. i feel like im slowly dyin everysingle day and i cant even say anythin bc my Ma will downplay it like i cant experience pain bc its not like hers. like i cant be depressed bc i show it differently than her. like im not tryin my fuckin hardest to jus survive. im so fuckin tired

[ashtcnirwin]

If you don't mind, can you explain the process behind creations like those? I dabble in Photoshop every so often but I wouldn't know where to begin with a project like that

the process goes something like find photos > click buttons in hopes that something good will happen > click more buttons > question life choices > click another handful of buttons > keep clicking on buttons until satisfied

no hgkfjfg uhhh well it's definitely a "it's not difficult or in any way technically advanced, it just takes a bit of time and patience"-type of edit, and i'm also very much an amateur at these things, which means that my process is chaotic, messy and nonsensical, so it's kinda hard to do a walk through as i bounce back and forth between steps a lot, but i can try and do a quick rundown to give you a basic idea!

using the ashton-one as an example, i started by finding the background texture and the photos of ashton i wanted to use, and then worked on finding the "perfect" placement for them on my canvas (i made the canvas 1080x1080 to fit instagram's requirements but for tumblr 540x540 would be enough). a lot of trial and error involved here, i have no idea how many photos i tried to make work but had to discard for one reason or another. once i was fairly confident i was happy with my selection, i took each photo out of the canvas, cleaned them up the best i could (remove blur, reduce colour noise, etc), then put them back in the canvas, and hardcut them and did a few small adjustments for the photos to blend in with the background (for example ashton's hand in the left-side big photo and his arm in the right-side big photo) using layer masks, leaving me with something like this

then came probably my least favourite part of making these types of things: making photos that are wildly different in terms of quality, colour, light balance, etc etc, match each other. using those adjustment layers for all they're worth bby, after which we had this

after that, i duplicated the background texture a number of times, placing them on top of all the photos of ashton, and played around with placements, layer masks and blending modes, as you can see here

with all of that, i'm left with this

after that, it's a whoooole lot of adjustment layers placed on top of all the other layers to achieve whatever colour scheme it is you're aiming for. i just counted and for the edit to go from the photo above to the one below, it took 18 adjustment layers (mainly curves, exposure, selective colour and colour balance, but also a gradient map and a colour lookup)

(oh and i also set the layer style of all the photos except the two big ones to outer glow at 75-70-70 for opacity, size and range)

then i stamped the whole thing, threw a quick little smart sharpen at it (i thinkkk i used 200-0,2-50 as my settings but don't quote me on it), and...that's it!

[strwberieswsugar]

TW: ED (por favor, sei que isto não é uma pergunta, de todo, correta, por isso não respondas, ou nem sequer leias, se não te sentires à vontade)

************************************************************************

Como perder peso? Estou cansada de continuar a engordar (e nem janto!!!!)

hii, como alguém com uma ed na minha opinião devias, se tiveres possibilidades, ver uma nutricionista q tenha experiência em eds ou alguém q não tenha como a perda de peso em si o principal foco (unlike me sadly lmao). se quiseres até te posso recomendar uma q foi a minha psicóloga q recomendou!

MAs, se não tiveres possibilidades o q eu acho q uma perda de peso saudável seria

1. controlo de porções tipo a cena de dividir o prato em 3 com proteína, hidratos e legumes/salada/wtv ou com cups

2. NÃO!!! cortar grupos de alimentos!! tipo ik q dizem para cortar hidratos e I did that!! mas tava sempre no hospital pq maus movimentos intestinais e the brain fog was INSANE pq aparentemente o cérebro só funciona com hidratos dps de serem simplificados e bby é horrível não ter energia para pensar em nada,,, liek we have lives and school and jobs lmao

3. eu acho q ninguém devia contar calorias pq é literalmente a road w no return soo again, saber as porções indicadas para ti é provavelmente o mais correto instead

4. mais exercícios aeróbicos tipo idk do q é q tu gostas mas andar, andar rápido (my personal fave na passadeira), correr, bicicleta, elíptica, nadar.. uma cena fixe é fazeres a cena dos 10000 passos por dia like é o mais low effort q consigo pensar e se conseguires fazer um dos outros mais intensos 2/3x por semana é elite

5. algum tipo de reforço muscular- com ou sem pesos is fine o q tu gostares. por exemplo: eu gosto de fazer low weights ou no weights e mais pilates style mas máquinas ou isso is good too. experimenta 1/2x por semana e dps vê como te sentes!

6. beber bué água

7. eu sei q jejum intermitente is a whole thing mas I personally don’t think u should skip meals especialmente se tiveres fome pq podes perder as hunger cues e literalmente nunca saber qd ou se tens fome ou não

8. im gonna sound like a gym bro mas é vdd I swear! gelatina sem açúcar é bué elite como fix snack especialmente agora no verão😭

9. pode ser helpful decidir as refeições q vais ter ao dia! mesmo a preparar e em controlo de quantidade e blabla. ex: agora gosto de fazer 3 refeições bué saciantes ao dia (pq irrita-me ter de estar sempre a pensar em comer e em o q comer e blabla então yaa lmao) mas há quem goste de ter bué lanchinhos e refeições mais pequenas!

10. incluir: frutas e legumes! proteína!! like se gostas de iogurtes aqueles kvarg ou yo pros são bué bons! fibra also! hidratos complexos! e claro gorduras *saudaveis* em porções controladas por refeição

11. não faças coisas q não gostes e não sejam sustentáveis para ti mesmo q tenha de ser por trial and error e demores a perceber o q elas são :)

12. dizem q dormir 7/8h é bué importante e eu acredito lmao acho q é para regular as hormonas e mesmo a fome e all that mas não tenho experiência pessoal com essa sgshsh

não me consigo lembrar de mais nada mas I hope that helps e podes sempre falar comigo se quiseres<33

[leejungchans]

I posted 2,553 times in 2022

That's 1,077 more posts than 2021!

1,305 posts created (51%)

1,248 posts reblogged (49%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@shuatonin

@leejungchans

@joshuas

@husbandhannie

@woozi

I tagged 2,538 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#sol answers - 745 posts

#moots &lt;3 - 521 posts

#seventeen right here 💎 - 499 posts

#anon bby - 311 posts

#aria 🦌💕 - 260 posts

#lee chan bonk 🔨 - 246 posts

#sol rbs - 151 posts

#sol.txt - 151 posts

#stfu.sol - 145 posts

#boyfie 🦦 - 136 posts

Longest Tag: 123 characters

#😞😞💗💗😞🧍🏻‍♀️🙄😉🥰🥰🔨😉🔨🔨💌💗💌💗🍒🍒😭😋😋💭🥝📲💔💗💗🥰😉😉💗😉💗🥰😍💗💕😁💗😁😞😁🌿🌿🛋😃💗🍒💗🥰💗😊🙄😊😍🍒💗

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

scored! : l.c

word count | 12.4k (SORRY idk why i do this to myself either)

pairing | lee chan (svt) x female reader

warning(s) / includes | swearing, mentions of drinking and alcohol, food mentions (lmk if i missed anything!!)

genre | fluff, humour, university au, enemies-to-lovers au

notes | uh i don’t really know how game season works bc it’s not really a thing in unis here (?) so ;-; please forgive me for any (inevitable) inaccuracies hghhghe also this is my first time making a moving banner so shhh just ignore how bad it is gwhsha

summary: lee chan should really stop winning so many games for your university, because as the resident writer for the sports column of the student newsletter, you’re starting to get really sick of having to cross paths with him all the time.

a/n: happy birthday to my boyfriend (/j) chan who’s also a loser (affectionate ig) bc he never pays rent for living in my head 🙄💗 also just thought everyone should see this clip that kinda inspired this whole fic okay bye—

See the full post

1,203 notes - Posted February 12, 2022

#4

trial and error : k.mg

word count | 2.9k

pairing | kim mingyu (svt) x female reader

warning(s) / includes | food mentions (lmk if i missed anything!!)

genre | fluff, humour (a lil), barista au

summary: three times mingyu tries to ask you out and fails and the one time he actually succeeds… though not without some help.

a/n: can’t have a valentine’s day/season without a present to my very seggsy wifey @seungcy 💗 heyyy babe happy very belated valentine’s day 😻 i hope you like this very little something i wrote about the man you always cheat on me with /j luv u hottie muah muah :hehecat:

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1,430 notes - Posted February 23, 2022

#3

seventeen as streamer boyfriends

༉‧₊˚✧ for my 1k event !

requested by anon : is streamer au on the table for the 1k event :0 if it is then can i request hcs of svt as ur streamer bf :3 if not then u can just ignore this / change it up , no worries !! thenkuu n congrats on the 1k :D

a/n: thank you so much for the well wishes and for requesting 💗 i hope you like this and i had a lot of fun writing this!!

word count | 1.6k

pairing | seventeen x gn!reader

genre | fluff, streamer au

note | i’m not a gamer by any means so there’s a lot of gaming terminology/games that idk, so most of the games mentioned here i looked up online 💔 also tyty to my lovely nny @joshuas @seungcy for helping me w some of these &lt;3

warning(s) / includes | mild swearing, food mentions

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1,586 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

#2

seventeen as new parents

༉‧₊˚✧ for my 1k event !

requested by @joshuas : i would also like to request hehe for a small parent au headcanon (maybe like when they first become parents </3) with svt </3

a/n: hihi shuawife <333 thank you for the req and i hope you’ll like this hehe 💓 requests open until june 1, see this post for more details/guidelines if interested <3

word count | 2k

pairing | seventeen x afab!reader

genre | fluff, parents au

warning(s) / includes | food mentions (please lmk if i missed anything!)

See the full post

1,805 notes - Posted May 25, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

seventeen’s reaction to the camera panning to them when their idol!s/o is on stage

༉‧₊˚✧ for my 1k event !

requested by anon : may i req svt reactions w/ idol s/o? you can decide on the scenario but cld i also add a detail that their relationship is public? thank you and congratulations once again!!!

a/n: hehe ty to the other anon who gave me the idea for the scenario <33 our braincells really clicked 🤝 i hope you both like this!!

word count | 1k

pairing | seventeen x gn!reader

genre | fluff, idol au

warning(s) / includes | none (please lmk if i missed anything!)

See the full post

2,749 notes - Posted July 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[hoe-doroki]

Hey Ana, new follower here ! How are you ? ☺️ First of all, I want you to know I am absolutely in love with your writing, the way you depict a whole atmosphere, the reader really gets to enter the scene, it always feels genuine and… I just love it ! Also your writing advice tag has been a blessing, it’s really helpful as I started writing a couple of months ago

Anyways I do have a real question (and I hope you never had to answer it before…) : I’m writing a short BakuDeku fic and I was wondering how do you usually find a beta reader ? My introvert ass doesn’t know anyone in the fandom yet and I feel like you can’t just reach out to people and say “Hey, you wanna read this thing I just wrote ?“ How do you find someone who’s kind of on the same page as you AND is willing to make the effort to give a real feedback ? (Damn I talk a lot haha)

I am doing well, thank you! I hope you’re doing well too. And wow, thanks for coming and following me. I hope you enjoy your time here! Hehe, I think that atmosphere is one of the things I’m not so great at, so I’m flattered you like it!

I don’t think I have answered that question before! Honestly, I’ve never had to go out and ‘find’ a beta reader before because I have one friend who I found wayyyy back in the day on ffnet by commenting on one of her pieces and she’s looked over all my stuff for the past eight years and I hers. Now, with bnha, I have a bunch of friends here who either offer when I mention I’m working on something or I’m in a discord where I can ask a group. (I also just don’t usually have my oneshots beta read.) So my personal experience won’t be of much help, unfortunately.

People usually find me as a beta reader using the beta reader tab on ffnet. I know, I know, everyone here talks about ffnet as a relic of history, but that’s actually a very useful function that it has that ao3 hasn’t ever utilized. Just sayin.

BUT implicitly, I think you’ve answered your own question here. Because what you have to do, as judging from my experience with my friend, is you just have to start making connections in the community. Which is what you’ve just done! Because look. You said bkdk. And I would die to read this fic, omg. Please, please, please take me on as your beta! I just finished my last project yesterday, pleeeeease, I beg!! I’m a hoe for my boys!!! I’m not even kidding!!!

Also, I’m glad the writing advice tag helps!! There’s SO much good advice out there and, of course, I’m always thrilled to talk shop and answer any questions.

Oh, but the part about finding someone on the same page on you who’s actually a really good beta? That’s just luck, tbh. You have no idea what kind of a beta someone is until you start. I’ve definitely had, um, awko taco moments like that. But, lucky for you, I’m a fantastic beta. I swear 😈😈

[dindjarindiaries]

omg i wanna write for din so badly but i have no ideas SJNDOSFHOSDHFOSDHF and i'm afraid bc i dont have a good enough grasp on his character that it'll flop :(( my writing could NEVER live up to yours sksk i srsly need help rip

Oh honey, don’t say that! Just take some more time to study his character. Listen to his dialogue, even try to use some of his own lines in your work to get a feel for how he acts. Writing something that takes place directly in the show helps so much to get you used to it! You got this!

[come-on-shitty-boys]

Hiii how are you doing? 💞 i really enjoy your writing 💕💕, it gives me a full dose of serotonin 🤩🤩. I started writing recently but I kind of feel really insecure about it 😖 I really like the way you describe action and the pace you give it. Could you give me some tips about it (how to combine gerunds and how to use ‘when’ or ‘as’ for describing an action)? 🥺 Hope you’re having a great day 💞💞!

hello, nonnie darling 🥺 i’m doing well.  how are you doing, sweetie?  are you drinking plenty of water today?

but uhhh deadass 👀 i am the least qualified person to be giving writing advice because I really uhhh don’t know?? it just kinda happens, but I will try my very best 🤗✨

below the cut because i drone on for a while

I draw a lot of the inspiration for my writing style and it’s pacing from 19th-20th century fiction.  I fell in love with authors like Jane Austen and Aldus Huxley when I was in high school and slowly started incorporating their wordy, descriptive writing into my own.  My biggest goal when I’m writing a scene, no matter what the scene depicts, is to make it as flowy and poetic as possible.

So, that tends to make my sentences really long, really wordy, relying very heavily on commas and things to combine my sentences.  I like to write how I would like to read to something.  This tends to make my writing come off very heavy, but that’s the style I like to read.  Varying sentence length can also help set a pace and a tone to your writing.  Long sentences (at least for me) always come off very dreamy and whimsical for me while I read.  Shorter sentences carry a sharper tone.  Something more urgent.  More impactful.  One of my favorite things to do though 👀

Single lines.

It really kicks some ass into those shorter lines and makes you kinda sit back, like, “Oh shit.”  It can almost turn your scene kind of eerie if that’s the vibes you’re going for.  It can also be really good for shifting your scenes if you’re unsure how to transition smoothly. 

Gerund phrases are literally one of my favorite writing devices, but that might be obvious.  It takes a little practice to utilize them in a sense that you like, but the way I always thought about it was, “What am I trying to say and how can I make it more complex?”  You can start with something really basic like, “The cat played the fiddle” that was google’s sentence not mine don’t judge me  and rearrange things to give it the vibe you want.  How is the cat playing the fiddle? What tone am I trying to set?  So, I could take the basic sentence we started with and turn it into, “The cat, playing the fiddle, the melancholic notes drifting through the air as if they carried but the weight of a feather, swayed steadily to his own tune, each movement only adding to the overbearing sadness of the scene.”

Notice how we took this very simple thing and expanded on it.  You’re asking questions now which is a big reason why I use gerunds as much as I do.  They help build the environment to engross you in the action and the scene.  

Nonnie, I want to let you know that it’s perfectly okay to be insecure about your writing.  It’s just what creators do.  We compare and tell ourselves that we aren’t good enough, but that’s where we’re wrong.  Because we are good enough.  Each one of us is unique in our style and how we go about writing.  We all consume different media, so we’re all going to create a little differently.  We could all be given the same starter sentence and go about in completely different ways.  

I get insecure about my work all the time, but it really does come down to just taking a deep breath and pressing post anyway and then just... not thinking about it for awhile?? I usually have things scheduled to post while I’m sleeping or while I’m in class, so when I put it in the queue, I usually kinda forget about it until it goes up?? That’s my favorite feature about tumblr tbh. 

If you’d like, you can always send me what you’re working on 👉👈 I’m sure whatever you wrote is wonderful and I’d love to take a peeksie if you’re comfy with that, but absolutely don’t feel pressured to 😭😭 

[thetriumphantpanda]

hi bby ✨ I’m hoping to spread a little love around today (it is someone’s birthday after all — so you might see others answering this)!

I am a big fan of people enjoying cake and celebrating, and sometimes cake can be just tooting your own horn 💁‍♀️ so with that in mind, I’d love to know what THREE pieces of work you’re super proud of that you’d recommend others reading, and why 🍰

Jo I was so happy to get this yesterday and I'm sorry for being so slow to reply!! This is SUCH a lovely idea and although I hate tooting my own horn, for you, I will!

Firstly, the entire Trial & Error series, including the sequel Come Away With Me and the on-going one-shots are up there for me! It was the first thing I wrote that really took off and I am so proud of how I managed to create such a loving and healthy three-way relationship between them all, but still make it hot as fuck, and the love I get on it still makes me emotional!

Secondly, my Javi series Take The Weight Off His Shoulders - it's the first time I've attempted to weave an additional storyline into something and I'm still having so much fun with it - I find Javi really hard to write sometimes but when I get it right in every chapter of this fic, I'm always so proud of myself.

And finally, my Marcus Pike fic, Masterpiece. It was a very different writing style to what I'm used to but I absolutely love the way it turned out!

Thank you so much for asking this and encouraging me to pause and look back and realise how proud I am of so much of my work!