#treatment requires
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heating pads aren't enough. i need a foreman grill facedown on my abdomen
#tw period#tmi but I'm soooo pissed off because I've been trying to get a doctor to listen to me about the possibility of endo and they won't.#it's always 'well there's ways to manage pain that don't include checking for endo' and. yes. but they're not working.#and I'd like to be checked for things like endometriosis that might have other implications for me BEFORE it's doing untreated damage.#like sorry. maybe i don't want to just constantly toss birth control at it before i even know what we're tossing it at.#and it's fine if afterwards we agree that BC is the best treatment. that was part of the plan regardless but my point stands.#I'm not anti-BC. at all. to be clear lol but I want to know WHY I'm bedbound and lowkey hemorrhaging. if that's not too much to ask.#they're always like 'it requires a surgical procedure' okay? it's my body? incise me up scotty???#I also don't trust this current administration and I want to figure out my problem here and to know my options while I have them. jfc
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"he would not fucking say that" except it's me watching any period piece going "she would not fucking have that botox"
#or filler or any other noticeable cosmetic treatment!#botox is just enemy number one because it literally makes them worse actors!!! acting requires making expressions!!!!#hate when an actress is giving everything in her eyes and voice but her face muscles are just motionless. free them!!!!#and i hateeee when it's meant to be like 1700 or something#talking
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have you ever wondered what it would've been like to attend the premiere of le sacre du printemps in 1913?
#german stuff#&#i would give anything to be a fly on the wall here omg#unfortunately all shows are sold out#like.. do they hand out barf bags?#i shouldn't laugh but i can't wrap my head around this#they have warnings and everything#3 people required medical treatment#what does that even mean?
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Bojan on the cover of Astro Suzy, special summer edition of Suzy Magazine, focusing on astrology and spirituality. Scans and ENG Translation by: @kurooscoffee Cover Title:
Bojan Cvjetičanin: "We have a duty to change things for the better"
Article title:
We are driven by our love of life
WITH JOKER OUT, WE HAVE WITNESSED A MENTAL LEAP AND A SOCIAL PHENOMENON THAT WE HAVE LONGED FOR. THE BOYS GIVE HOPE THAT YOUNG PEOPLE ARE CONNECTING INTO A STRONG COMMUNITY THAT CARES ABOUT THE FUTURE, EVEN THOUGH PREVIOUS GENERATIONS HAVE LEFT THEM IN RUINS. IN A FLOOD OF STARLETS AND ARTIFICIALLY CREATED ONLINE INFLUENCERS, WE GOT ROLE MODELS WHO DON'T OFFER DISCOUNT CODES, BUT IMPORTANT MUSICAL MESSAGES ABOUT VALUES. IN THE MIDDLE OF A SLOVENIAN AND EUROPEAN TOUR, THE LEAD SINGER AND VISUAL OF THE BAND SHARED WITH US WHAT HE'S THINKING ABOUT, WHAT CAUSES HE'S STANDING BEHIND, AND WHY IT'S BENEFICIAL TO DEEPEN YOUR SPIRITUAL KNOWLEDGE. What are you thinking about as representatives of the new wave, the new generation? What is your attitude towards the dynamics in society, climate change, pervasive social networks, in short, everything that weighs on modern man? On the one hand, we ourselves are involved in all the processes that actively and continuously prolong the problems you are talking about. On the other hand, we are deeply aware of them and we are afraid of what is coming. It seems to me that in our generation the desire for change is very strong. There is a universal language of youth that has come together on the basis of feeling obliged and able to change things for the better. The song New Wave is about just that. We are ready to celebrate this common strength because we are encouraged by the idea that we are not alone. At the same time, we know that we are compelled to do something because someone before us has seriously 'fucked up'.
In your hit song 'Novi Val' (New Wave), already the very first verse has you wonder where to go from here. Do you know the answer?
If we want to do anything other than burn the horizon, the only way is towards community, away from egocentrism, with an onlook towards common good.
Let's stick to the anthem of the generation of love, as you named your peers and loyal supporters. The phrase 'We were born yesterday and everything is already our fault' is powerful and worrying. You have been given a pitiful lagecy by your ancestors. How do you defend yourself from taking a role of a victim and instead get actively involved in creating a brighter future?
Great question! It would be hard to change anything for the better if we put on the victim's cloak. The fact that in recent years it has become clear that there is a rebellion by people who have had enough is already a cause for optimism. When you put yourself in the role of the one who carries a scepter as a synonym of the leader of change, you move away from being a victim. And each one of us in this community carries it. In reality, we are taking the position that society is currently a victim and it is our task to defend it.
How?
We all contribute in our own way. The role of musicians is to connect people with positive messages. So by constantly reminding people about friendship, love and other social components that can be tapped into through music. In Slovenia, we have a lot of organisations that are trying to change the situation for the better in many different ways. It does not require much to at least educate oneself about what these organisations are doing. I have the feeling that many people would like to get involved and help. At the end of grammar school and at college, we were encouraged to find out about collective organisations. It was clear to them that many people would want to join of their own initiative once they knew what they stood for. I know many former classmates who are very active members and supporters of various movements. Even if we minimise our own negative energy on social networks, it is a big step towards a good state of society, and of mind.
(picture 1: Family Cvjetićanin knows how to stick together)
You seem to care about a world that is increasingly drowning in chaos. You have become idols, not only of young people, but also of their parents. Is this a burden of responsibility or does it encourage you do even more activism?
It's a great feeling when the little ones take you for an idol. As a teenager, it was also inspiring to be surrounded by the music of Big Foot Mama and Siddharta. It gave me a message in a language that I could not compare with anything else. But our creativity does not depend on what people think of us or how they perceive us. But it is a great honour to know that you are one of those who encourage someone. Many people are listening, but not hearing. Joker Out is made up of five individuals who, in real life, when the cameras and the spotlights are off, are just normal guys. We went through all the processes of growing up on the streets, socialising and playing. We went through the process of going to school, and we were not problematic adolescents. Even today, our most extreme departure from an ideal is what 99% of young people do. To party sometimes. We are not outlaws by nature.
Your work is a beacon of light, a source of hope and strength. Many have done it before you, especially the Beatles. A lot has changed since their era, much of it unfortunately for the worse. How do you keep optimistic? Why is it worth the effort?
Every musician in history who has sung about ending war and living for love has failed miserably. I believe that at least those people who follow the messenger are convinced of peace and love. If every musician encourages someone to to do so, it's a hefty amount of opponents of hate. We are driven forward by love for life.
Writing texts is a responsible job, and you are baring your soul at the same time. Where is the line, to what lengths are you willing to go to protect the most vulnerable part of yourself?
I have never consciously inhibited the process of looking inside myself. But I feel that with age and experience I understand more and more what can lead me to a deeper state of mind. In the beginning I didn't dare to dig into myself. Today I have no problem in fully exposing my feelings, because they are, after all, states that happen of their own accord - and it is impossible to force them
(picture 2: The boys of Joker Out became even closer)
No Slovenian artist has enjoyed such a fierce international success as Joker Out. Concerts in iconic European clubs are literally sold out in hours, even minutes. How do you accept fame? Is it a blessing or is there also a bit of fear?
There are certainly Slovenian musicians with international experience. Maybe not at our age, but that doesn't take away from their importance. We have achieved a very nice success here in terms of listeners, we have honed our skills and we have grown with the band as a collective. We have grasped who and what we are as a whole. We are a group of people who make music purely because we really enjoy it. Whatever feelings our music-making evokes, it all comes from us in the most sincere way, Fortunately, our music is liked by a larger crowd and we have managed to transmit our unforced joy, happiness, joy across national borders. There is no better catalyst for such a breakthrough than Eurovision, we chose the moment to participate wisely. It paid off as a successful project, because for a good band it doesn't matter which part of the world it comes from. It's important to be heard - and we were heard by a lot of people. The only thing that has changed so far is that the bonds between us have strengthened. Suddenly we have been forced to talk about emotions and experiences that we did not have before. There has been a lot of filtering of unfamiliar feelings. The desire to create increased a thousandfold for all five of us.
Are you aware of the role that the public attributes to you, to act as a beacon of light in a crowd of frustrated, bitter people?
No. I would hardly say that I can understand that. Every time I hear something like that, it strikes me that it is saying too much. I really cannot think of myself in such a strong context.
You are giving yourself away. You are constantly on the road, interviews, concerts, promotional tours. It's exhausting. How do you recover? What calms you down, fills you with grace?
It's true that we give a lot of ourselves. But we get so much more in return. Nothing calms me more than coming home and being close to my family. And of course the company of Kris, Jan, Jure and Nace. The people we were with friends before this euphoria, have stayed with us, this team surround us with a lot of love.
(picture 3: He's noticing, that young people are connecting into a strong community that cares about the future)
As a front-man and lyricist, you are even more exposed. You've crossed the magical 200 thousand followers on Instagram, which is a mega number, but also a mega stressful situation. Most young people who find themselves in such a situation turn to intoxicating substances. Can you consciously stop and say that you need time for yourself?
The only thing that made me a bit anxious was the sudden exposure to such a large audience'on social media. This brings with it unimaginable dimensions of human imagination, including malice. Imaginary stories emerge in which people literally compete to see who can come up with something more bizarre. This stress got to me at the beginning, because I felt that I had to defend myself in front of the public. In the end, I realised that I didn't need to convince anyone and that it was enough to know the truth. With the help of colleagues who have similar experiences, I have calmed down. As for the substances, I have a natural protection against those, because I am an incorrigible hypochonder. I dare not take an aspirin unless it is really urgent. Above all, I know when to stop.
You come from a close-knit, loving family. That is certainly a solid foundation on which to build your personality. What is their view of everything that happens to you?
They are very proud! Of all my achievements and of me for being able to pull off a music career combined with the academic milestone of graduating. My parents and my grandmother are definitely my biggest supporters. They accompany me on my journey with warnings, but they are more about eating regularly, to not get a stomach ache, to consume enough water and to get enough sleep. I have been chronically lacking the latter in the last few weeks.
What is your relationship to astrology, esotericism, in short, something that is intangible but can be felt?
Superstition is the one I use the most. For Eurovision I had a special pair of underpants and I was haunted by the feeling that if I didn't wear them, everything would go to hell. Jan's mum gave me a lace clover, which I didn't dare leave in Ljubljana. I asked the stylist to sew it on my outfit as a precaution. I got a clay horseshoe from a little girl, and it went with me to Liverpool. It will seem strange to some, but I believe in energies and ghosts.
How do you strengthen your spiritual side?
Not very well. I wish I had managed to acquire more spiritual knowledge in the last year. For example, basic meditation techniques and the laws of yoga, because I am definitely not physically active enough. The feeling of being 90 years old eats up most of my spirit. My back hurts all the time. The best thing I do for inner growth is to read books. Not enough, but I'm going to get better. A little less phone scrolling and more self-reflection, that'll do the job! Author: Tomaž Mihelič, PHOTO: VITA OREHEK
Scans and translation by: @kurooscoffee (jokeroutsubs) DO NOT REPOST!
#Joker out#bojan cvjetićanin#bojan cvjeticanin#a sociologist rambling about sociological issues... this interview was so much fun to translate#but also challenging!!#i hope I did it justice#Bojan is SO well spoken in Slovenian <3#and anyway people who have been following us saw the stuff like Bojan/JO doing these random acts of kindness that'd almost stay unnoticed#because JO never mention them - but the people who they made happy posted about it on their websites and social media so we learnt about it#they're also doing another charity concert next week in Ljubljana for a kid with a unique illness that requires very expensive treatment#there were also reports of Bojan donating to charity before he was even (that) famous#so yeah he's not just bullshitting but really stands behind what he says#he's a good bean
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bruh i saw some dumb fucks arguing about insulin earlier today. basically saying if it was made free like ozempic it would be abused
and idk how to tell people this but insulin is free in a lot of places and it is not open to abuse
#thats the point of prescription only medication#the problem with things like ozempic isnt the price its the over prescription#making it free saves lives#also charging is a false economy#you end up with more people requiring emergency treatment because they cant afford the preventative medication the insulin#for a health care system the best option is to make the prevention free
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just experienced what its like to have someone say some actuall bullshit on how the Thing im studying at uni works for the first time. insane feeling
#someone brought up how they think kids with communication issues and disabilities should be socially integrated in schools and what the#schools responsibility is and i got to be like Actually im studying school social work and um legally theyre required to draft up student#specific action plans in collaboration with school councellors and psychiatrists as well as blah blah blah#to be clear they were approaching it from an ableist angle of like No Special Treatment. kills them with my mind
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i hate researching things that are highly variable because i'll try to find an answer to a question and all the search results are like "well the answer depends on like 12 different parameters so there is no direct answer it just needs a professional to evaluate" and i'm like AUGHHGH
#partly because then i need file my questions down into something much more specific#which often requires me to make decisions on things i'd rather have kept vague#this applies to multiple things but i most often see it when researching medical information#because of course the treatment and evaluation of a condition is going to be based on the severeity and situation#so i'm like sigh. so no general rule? just 'it depends'? ur not gonna at least give me an average? cries
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you know what I find both tragic and terrifying?
the fact that I grew up with pretty copious communities and resources and information about both multiplicity and otherkin/therian identities.
Like, there were websites. There were forums. There were LiveJournal communities. I had so many sources of information, so many perspectives on what it meant to be things, etc. It was really great! It allowed for a diverse but cohesive community and there was always drama of course, but the larger community usually still existed.
Today tho it seems like everyone's getting their info from 17yo tiktokers who are making shit up as they go along. And that kinda terrifies me.
#like ppl on tiktok are insisting that DID and multiplicity are 100% the same thing?#like... no?#DID is a specific trauma-based diagnosis#not all multiples fall under the umbrella of DID#and if you don't you probably shouldn't TRY to bc it won't help???#being multiple doesn't automatically require treatment#but ppl with DID even if they don't reintegrate they explicitly have trauma to grapple with that sparked the multiplicity#anyway
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wishing my brain worked <3
#have had a very bad week of can't think and forgetting to breathe and losing track of my body#wishing this week a very hurry up and be friday so i can go back to the doctor and beg for treatment#if they reschedule again i swear i'm really gonna do it this time#energy levels have been better since shutting myself off from everyone <3 and doing some other figuring and experimenting with routines#but then i did a couple of social things and then didn't sleep well one night and had a migraine or something yesterday as a result#or something. who the fuck knows.#god also gotta call the neuro office they never sent in my disability paperwork alskdjfa;sdf#it's just that everyone is asking so much of me that requires my brain when my brain actually and truly isn't working
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I wish I could just veilguard all day today to escape Things but ofc I woke up at 3am with an absolutely killer migraine…..and I can’t afford not to work today 🫠
#it’s the worst I’ve have in a while ugh#it’s half weather related and half the massage I got yesterday related#maybe half shark week related too#yeah that’s 3 halves it’s that bad okay#this is the first time I’ve been able to tolerate my eyes being open in a few hours#without excruciating pain…..#I can’t afford to miss work today tho…..#I’m still staying home because I will not be able to do the things I need to at work today#physically#there are so many foot treatments today#(which require front desk help and lots of being On for the clients)
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friendly reminder that this is the diagnostic criteria for CFS! you likely have CFS if you experience:
debilitating fatigue that impacts your daily functioning for 6+ months
unrefreshing sleep
post exertional malaise (significantly worsened symptoms for days, weeks, or months after activity that you used to be able to tolerate without these symptoms)
cognitive impairment (brain fog, decreased processing speed, memory, attention) AND/OR orthostatic intolerance (frequent lightheadedness/dizziness while upright, especially for long periods of time or becoming upright from a reclined position)
sidenote: some of these symptoms can be caused by other health conditions, so if you suspect you may have CFS, i'd recommend getting a panel of blood work done to check your iron, vitamin B+D, and magnesium levels in particular, as well as a thyroid panel. also, kind of obvious but other things can cause significant fatigue such as dehydration, disordered eating, poor sleep hygiene, etc.
other common symptoms include joint and muscle pain, headaches, flu-like symptoms, disturbed sleep, sensory sensitivity, and gastrointestinal issues.
this screenshot is from this document by mayo clinic (2021) which i just found today and is honestly a great resource
some basic resources:
solve ME/CFS initiative
#MEAction network
some more in-depth resources:
MEpedia
ME/CFS research network
open medicine foundation
#that other post abt cfs inspired me#i feel like So many ppl have cfs and just think they're dysfunctional#and i am both a firm believer that capitalism is one of the main causes of cfs And that it is a medical condition/disability that requires#specialized medical treatment#ok Evan Out#cfs/me#chronic fatigue syndrome#disability#chronic illness
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read this book read this book read this book r
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I hate how the only acceptable response in front of personal tragedies is fear and commiseration. I'm angry I'm angry I'm angry and I despise how it gets me condescending looks instead of the pity support that fear would get me instead
#i hate it so much because when you don't talk people don't take you seriously#but when you do talk you have to watch your tone and your emotions because otherwise “#'you're making too much of a scene' or 'oh i didn't know it was that bad'#or 'other people have it worse'#or 'you should have said something sooner'#The sad thing is that it all comes from people near me or from professionals#apparently having more than one bad thing going on at the same time annoys people around you#who feel like your trying to rob their spotlight with your shitty life#god i hate it here#and let's not talk about the money required to get good treatment#and time#and the precariousness of the job market#I'm so scared#it's just not ny fault that my first response to fear is reacting#roba mia
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reading on dbt stuff and like. everyone talks so highly of it and how effective it is but ehhhh ... im struggling to see how to make it work for me
#first it seems to require a lot of focusing on one thing at a time and bbg my adhd would never#and also. ik the goal is to acknowledge your emotions and thoughts without letting them take over and etc#but knowing myself i'll suppress them instead. which i already do a lot. i want to unlearn that; not worsen it#that and everything surrounding the idea of mindfulness makes me cringe a little. but thats on me#i'll pluck whatever skill i can manage and deal w it ig#hmm or maybe the treatment or approach is different for quiet bpd?#lua talks
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I still think Formula 1 was designed for sports anime….
#i think it would require a lot of research and commitment.. yuri on ice level treatment to be embraced…#but rivalries! teammates and ex-teammates! the car and crew as well as the driver!!#a broad range of people from all over the world… reigning icons and up and coming rookies..#Maybe have to have made up companies but… you know the legacies vs. the new energy drink lol..#new locations every time.. (though in terms of production - a lot of work…) narratively approapriate or frustrating weather!!#formula 1
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I'm bored at work so I'm seeing if I should report my old company for violating labor standards.
#totes bro#im so close but it is so obvious it would be me because i used to complain about this all the time#they dont inform their immigrant workers of their rights and so they dont like understand how their timecard works#and thr company advises them to take the least expensive insurance policy because they 'are healthy and don't need it'#but i know one couple wants fertility treatments but couldnt afford it because of that#they dont have the required posters#they also knowingly continue osha violations which i held a meeting over and was told this doesnt apply to us#which uhm it says it does on the Web site so i disagree#all of this is like why i left and what caused me to leave#and literally lying to me and another guy that we would get promotions for the work we did#and then they hired someone else to do the job making our promotions unnecessary and they were like hmmmm sorry#idk they like got a ton worse and i think the president got more reactionary which caused this#not sure how many of these count but thats not for me to decide anyway#oh and cleanliness standards but i actually fixed a lot of those..... fulfilling the role that promotion role that was promised#my coworkers here are like 'absolutely report the hell out of that place' because we do code violations lol#every time i say something they go 'that could be a violation :)'#they paid someone on a salary basis when they were under the salary pay and therefore should have gotten overtime
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