#treat others the way youd like to be treated etc etc

[despazito]

Idk maybe I'm just upset bc the maker under fire is one of my favourites and I really look up to them as a textile artist, but it's super disheartening seeing them open up about repeat burnout and depression making it impossible to continue work only to see other makers coming out of the woodwork to self promote saying "if you want a fursuit from someone responsible who doesn't suck hmu!!!". Absolute vulture behavior. I hope you don't expect any sympathy from followers when you yourself fall on hard times if that's how you treat your peers in this community when they're down.

[feligayzed]

your p.ai.nter and your surface au are making me ILL (positive) im a huge huge fan ...

UM! if youd allow me to ask can you tell me all about surface au .... i need to know everything about them so i can be MORE ILL ABOUT THEM!!

HIHIHI!!! AUGH I finally have time to sit down and yap, I've been thinking about this ask all day SKJSJCJ AAAA FIRST AND FOREMOST I'm so glad you're enjoying it and it's making you deathly ill!!!! Good!!! Suffer!!! Along with me and the five other mentally unbalanced watercolor heathens here 🙂‍↕️ /silly

So!! Originally I thought it up just as an excuse to draw human(ish) Seb kissing and cuddling a robot in dire need of it, but then I Thought some more and it transformed into a hurt/comfort/healing au?? The healing being from the shared trauma they endured back at the Blacksite (working through it via various measures and expanding their relationship as a whole), while simultaneously learning how to function in a modern world they are very much unfamiliar with

The general premise is Sebastian gains most of his human form back, with Painter to help assist him in recovery, like physical therapy and reintroducing him to society XD Sebastian having a difficult time processing emotions now that he's free and it all has time to sink in, etc etc~ The same goes for Painter, however, and they're just gonna have to work it out together cuz they got BAGGAGE no therapist is qualified for. Our dear Painter has their fair share of shit too, such as the sapiency debate most people have an aversion to (because how could an object process thoughts and emotions in a meaningful way?? Unheard of! /sar)

And the rest is just domestic silliness because they're allowed some happiness 😁 and because I'm under the firm belief Sebastian would become a house wife if someone let him /hj

But that's basically it!! One big fat drawing prompt really (⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠) I commend you for making it through this whole yap sesh fr 🙏 if you're still interested just let me know and if I have sudden Thoughts I'm more than happy to drop them unannounced 💥💥💥 DOODLES FROM MY SHITFIC AS A TREAT‼️

[joydoesathing]

IT NEEDS TO BE SAID!!!

Joy… Lets just… appreciate your brain.

Like, in OG tnmn if a guys is wearing a tie, you manage to put in in the gender bend’s design (Agnes’ necklace, W’s necklace, Izabelle’s scarf, Francis’ dress she wears under the milklady coat, arlenes scarf etc etc)

You stick to their OG colour pallete! Like how Martins tie has the polka dots (ref to Margerettes dress) and Raffael’s Hawaiian t-shirt!

Hair. THE WAY YOU DESIGNED EACH CHARACTERS HAIR. I LOVE IT!

THE WAY YOU DRAW SHOES. I COULD NEVER!

You actually stick to like, 50s fashion. Like, accurate 50s fashion.

Your artstyle itself is just gorgeous

They just LOOK like their genderbend’s genderbend. You can easily tell who’s who without confusion

Character design isn’t even the SURFACE of your creativity.

YOU MAKE EXTREMELY GOOD LORE FOR YOUR CHARACTERS!!!

Im being fr, you’re a really good storyteller.

You see the characters as real life people with actual stories and views.

YOU DO RESEARCH!!!!!! THIS IS ONE OF THE THINGS I APPRECIATE THE MOST! You actually research and understand facts about the 50s and its customs and what they considered normal!

Something else I like about the characters is that they’re realistic, yes I’m extremely delusional and want Frances x Nacho to be together but they aren’t exactly made for eachother, which is why they aren’t together. WHICH MAKES SENSE!

YOU WOULD WILLINGLY CHANGE A CHARACTER’S LORE IF SOMETHING NEW IS DISCOVERED IN THE GAME! I’m mainly talking about Dr. w and Michael, you changed their age (27 to 36) when the th project document got solved, and you said youd change some things up abt Wil’s lore again in campaign mode

Okay, so this might be controversial but… I really appreciate how You didn’t draw NSFW of Nacho x Frances. Yes, they’re your characters and you have to power to draw whatever you want with them (chelsea in the corn outfit lmao) But you chose not to draw NSFW of the 2. FRANCES WAS SEVENTEEN! Imho, you made a good decision.

YOU ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND ALL THE BIASES! Martin was judged because of his eye, Wilma was judged because she was a WOMAN, and Anatolii is judged because of not having a mother and glenn and arlene are judged for their race.

THE CHARACTERS ARE REALISTIC! NONE OF THEM HAVE A ‘PERFECT’ LIFE. THEY ALL HAVE FLAWS AND PROBLEMS THAT THEY’VE FACED. I WOULD LIST THEM ALL BUT THAT WOULD TAKE FOREVER!

Okay thats chap 1 of me talking abt how much i appreciate ur au.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

My heart cannot- thank you for appreciating the effort that i invest too much into the characters 💗

when I made this AU, I initially did it for making genderbent designs for them but afterwards i thought that it would be more fun for the neighbors to have they're own individual traits and detailed stories!

i value putting in all my effort I can give to make sure everyone is their own character at the end of the day.

not to be judgemental but i kind of find it very unsatisfying when there's only certain neighbors that are given so much emphasis and detail and the rest are treated like "props" or their personality, dialogue, actions and drive are solely built around the certain character/s with a lot of detail to make them look better or have story development while the "prop" characters themselves remain stagnant with no interesting traits to them or only one-dimensional traits

and honestly for me, i feel like the characters would be more interesting and fun if they were kind of realistic ,aka have some kind of character development and have faced struggles and biases on the way, so that from there, the neighbors, while coming from very different backgrounds and lives, can still connect, empathize and make bonds with each other via similar struggles in their lives :))

so in conclusion: my enthusiasm for making genderbent designs for them + wanting all of them to be actual characters with character gave birth to what is known as my genderbend au. it became my little isolated platform in the tnmn fandom where i can go crazy with these expectations and wants for the neighbors without necessarily conflicting with the hcs that people have for the OG neighbors

(also I don't mind if you make a whole ass list)

[atoriv-art]

What's your favorite Nejigaa headcanon?

love when i get these so i get to ramble. thank you so much

well i started to be fond of them as a pairing from the idea of neji finding some solace from his clan issues in suna! he initially started going there as just as extra protection sent by konoha for gaara in whatever diplomatic business he might be on, but eventually gaara starts requesting him specifically because

it gives neji some space from konoha as he knows it stresses him out, and gaara post-chunin exams is someone who really wants to offer others a helping hand when he can

he's fond of him :3 there's some brief panels in chunin exams where you see gaara appearing to be a bit fixated on neji (like he got fixated on sasuke, just to a much lesser extent) and i think that would morph into fondness as he chills out and no longer sees people whose anger he relates to as 'prey', so to speak!

the whole 'you almost killed my teammate' thing wouldn't just go away immediately even if gaara Is friendly with lee, imo neji is the type of person to hold onto those grudges even if lee himself might not, but he's also someone who is very easy to disarm with like... honesty and empathy. and as much as gaara is stone-faced, he is also very much someone who has a lot of both! his Tone initially rubs neji the wrong way because it's just So unfiltered, but it also gets to him because it's impossible to dispute gaara's sincerity when he puts everything so bluntly, yknow? and as someone who grew up hiding or otherwise obscuring many of his true feelings (majorly by necessity, but later on also out of sheer habit), it's a trait that neji finds very very admirable — its part of why i like him with sasuke too, i think neji is drawn to people who are very openly themselves, people whose ideals are impossible to ignore

this got so long (as youd expect.) and definitely strayed from the initial ask so here's a read-more <3

neji fusses over him a lot id say, he comes to think of gaara as a very noble person — someone with power and who is trying to make the world a better place with that power — and he gets protective over people he considers so fundamentally Good. i think it's nice for gaara to have someone like that around (esp divorced from his past, a bond that he's managed to build on his own by his own merits) and it gives him a lot of fondness for neji in return :)

a lot of their rs progression is this back and forth of finding out like, how much the other Feels and how gentle the other can be when not forced into situations that bring out the worst out of them.. i Love the idea of gaara's disposition softening up (being more outwardly sweet, more playful) a lot as he grows closer to people, it's why i like drawing him being so affectionate even though he's so introverted... i think the contrast is cute :-)

i'm also super fond of the thought of them unpacking some of their family troubles together lmao, i think it'd especially be good for gaara as he has a lot to retroactively think about once he's not on survival mode 24/7 and he might benefit from a detached third party as a listening ear — his siblings have their own baggage attached to their father, their mother, and their uncle, after all. and well if anyone knows what it's like to have a complicated family history it's neji :P

also as a bonus. imo temari+kankuro would get along with neji (…after a bit. everyone involved here is a bit of an asshole but that's part of their charm ok.) but kankuro treats him like he's his secret extra sibling. meaning he really likes the guy but also meaning he will not know peace under their roof. they argue about anything and everything

hinata and gaara also get along pretty well despite gaaras Past. mostly because i think hinata should be friends with every autism boy there is (shino. sai. etc) but also because i think the thought of her being like "i know he used to be a serial killer but let's hear him out people can change 🥺 he's so sweet he likes plants" is really funny

[bitchimasnake-sss]

At this point, I'm just stalking your page! Like I've said before- MASTERPIECES ~

So, if you see me spamming your notifications. I'm just coming in and liking all the posts, now you know why!

But I do have a request for you for the monster trio. Could you write one where the reader talks so much about her family to them, like they feel like they're already part of the family?

Like they already know what family members like and don't, what ticks them off, and such- like they want to meet your family! They want to meet the family that helped raise their girlfriend into the most amazing person in the world! They want to say thank you for allowing them to be part of her world.

So when they hear they'll be going to the island you're from. They get as excited as you to meet/see them, trying their best to look presentable. (Even showering!- I'm looking at you, Luffy, and Zoro👀)

When they met, not only did they welcome him into the family with welcoming arms- HE GETS TREATED BETTER THAN YOU! I can see the family telling them embarrassing stories, showing pictures of you as a kid- He ends up taking some copies of them back to the ship because they can't believe how adorable you were.

Little did he know that they'd already been accepted into the family way before you guys started dating. She would send her family letters telling them how amazing of a boyfriend they are.

I'm so sorry! I got too excited and wrote all this- if it's too much to do to it's okay! I'm close to my family and love them a lot- like I know the monster trio didn't have a great childhood, didn't know their family, etc. Being around a family where you can love each other very much moves them.

Sorry- I'm just rambling! Again! Love your work!!!

this has been in my inbox for fucking months. but im obsessed and finally motivated. lets get fucking wholesome. (idk if youd even see this but hopefully it lives out to your expectations!!)

time of my life ft. monkey d. luffy!

set-up: growing up in a small island with a tight knit community simply meant you were the closest with your parents. they had been your support system, from their grand gestures of love like being present on your important days to the small ones like just offering a shoulder to cry on when you had a rough day, they were truly everything to you. so, it's only natural that you mentioned them a little (or maybe a lot) to your boyfriend. and it may/may not have been a grave mistake.

luffy:

(going off a slight tangent here but its so funny that luffy's character design is just him having giant bug-like himbo eyes and smile. love him 🙏🏼)

♡ everyone loves luffy. that's pretty much his thing. the easiest way to describe him is by thinking of him as a baby goat. no matter how hard you try, you're probably gonna like him at some point or the other. even if you hate animals and babies. its gonna happen because its inevitable. ♡ so, it didn't take you long to figure out that he'd probably fit right in with your family (especially since he was so close with ace whenever he visited, family seemed like his kinda thing) ♡ even before you started dating, when you'd receive letters from your family, luffy was usually the one to ask how they were doing and what you were gonna write back. so, at one point, it seemed as if he knew your family like his own. ♡ he knew of your father's knee pain and your mother's distaste for drinking (she'd probably hate zoro and force him to bath). he knew of your younger sibling's favourite dishes and that they freak out when they see spiders of any size. he listened whenever you talked and for that, you were grateful. ♡ in your recent letters, you may have talked about him. how he's a bit of an idiot but has the heart of gold, how he makes you laugh when you miss your family and how within the crew, you found a new family altogether. ♡ so ofc, one day when you mentioned very briefly that your island is nearby, he and nami had to take a quick detour. ♡ ideally, if your boyfriend knows everything about your family, they'd try to be the perfect boyfriend and do everything right. but this is luffy. so he just remained the exact same and info dumped everything he knew in front of your family (neurodivergent tendencies i presume). ♡ but ofc ur family was obsessed. your mom almost wept tears of joy from how much this bitch was enjoying her food (both you and her lost count after the 17th plate tbh). your sibling almost murdered luffy because now they had to clean a significant amount of plates now. but everyones having a jolly good time (except you 👍🏼) ♡ but now you're parents are showing pictures from your childhood and WHY ARE YOU BUCK NAKED IN LIKE HALF OF THEM JESUS FUCKING CHRIST MOM STOP IT!! YOURE LIKE EMBARASSING ME!! ♡ you ended up leaving after a good three days (the crew had other stuff to get to and a detour can only be so long), but everyone left the place with good memories. sanji has now acquired ten new recipes, zoro may have stolen some alcohol concoction recipes and luffy may have stolen all of your parent's affection towards you. ♡ well whatever, its okay ♡ also, you're not supposed to know this but luffy now has three of your baby photos (all of them may/may not be embarrassing as fuck). it's okay though because it just proves to him that you were adorable then and are adorable now.

a/n: zoro's and sanji's parts will be up soon y'all im trying to write fluff 😭✋🏼

[akgaereporter]

nct: sunflowers attacking dream over recent haechan live ☠

tldr: during haechan’s recent welive he said he permed his hair & dream "thought something was wrong" with it so he got it straightened again. some sfs/hc solos started losing their damn minds over that🤕 he also talked a lot abt music he wants to release and highkey called sm out, and all of this got the sunflower girlies real mad i guess..

so earlier haechan went live on weverse and was talking about dream's reaction to him perming his hair:

some sfs went kinda insane over this☠

like woah..? how did we go from 1 to 100☠ i cant even tell whos a solo, a unitzen, or a dream anti thats how bad it is..

and when dreamzens started ratioing these folk, this person said its hypocritical for them to say psychoanalyzing is weird when drmzens did the same to 127 with their constant coworker allegations

idk what they were tryna say here like okay..?? then yall both freaks☠

☆ my opinion

icl and say i’ve been keeping up w this 284828483 year old unitzen drama but i do remember the coworker allegations the last person was talking about, it got really bad at one point, however that doesnt excuse the INSANITY that is going on here. inserting urself into this big ole grown man’s relationships and acting like hes some kind of poor bullied people pleaser who can’t make any choices for himself is so crazy PLEASE wake up. if any of yall lewsers read past the first line of those translations youd see he agreed and said he also didn’t like the way the perm came out (bc the back was all curly and his bangs weren’t)☠️ imagine getting ur hair done and looking crazy, so u listen to ur homeboys and get it fixed but ur deranged 70 hour sceentime having ass fans start acting like they punched u unconscious, strapped u to a chair and straightened it themselves.. id smoke a pack the size of both koreas too if my stans were so insufferable like dont embarass me.. all y’all doing is exposing u have absolutely zero friends bc ive never seen a more normal interaction between groupmates☠️

but all this lowkey feels like a reaction to some of the things hc said concerning music/solo scheds during the live. its obvious that sm is in fact sabotaging him bc ur telling me 8 years in, as one of nct's strongest vocalists and a popular member, he hasn't released any proper solo music despite wanting to..??? and is still getting micromanaged this far into his career? if 2+2 is 4 um...

like i thought after a certain amount of time idols start having more of their own creative/appearance direction like with bts, seventeen etc. i guess it might be bc those groups make a lot self written music but still..? doesnt hyuck write music too? to have a star on ur hands like this and fumble is so crazy to me, theres no other explanation than they want him to stay local and not get too big for the brand since hes one of the centers in nct.

but girl bye.. if they let his fame grow, all they'd have to do is treat him properly and he wouldn't want to leave they wack ass company. they just dont want him to have a choice☠ now they got him on lock bc they dont know how to act right. im not condoning anything but i really do understand why so many haechan/nct solos in general exist.. it all starts & ends with sm's fuckassery cause if my biases got steady treated like garbage id get hostile towards ANYONE in and out of the group too like..

anyways had to wake this tea up🤕 haechan deserves better everything i fear. better company, better fans, but NOT a better group. he loves those boys down and all of them are highkey in the same boat but saying that on unitzentwt will get you SHOT. stay strapped in these streets..

[c l o s e t a b ?] ◀ ⇨ akgaepop.com

[agp]

i saw your comments on a public transit post and just. love it so much. why can't public transit go door to door? why can't it operate with feedback and requests from its users? why can't it be adaptable? imo the 'we provide service you consume it' vibe is the exact same thing that private cars do. create a bunch of followers rather than people with unique needs (and thus being inaccessible to many). would love to hear any more ideas you have, especially as this is something i dream of designing along with the accessible community to go with <3

so the specific post in question was about transit systems with centralized access points, or stops/stations, and using the term public transit to talk about the limits of those particular systems. so in a way, definitionally, this 'public transit' could never apply to door to door because that would make it something else (paratransit, taxi service, etc). so while that is a limit to those systems i dont think its the kind of limit op was trying to critique.

'transit infrastructure' is a better term for what i want to reform. this includes everything from physical infrastructure like roads and cars to financial infrastructure like loans and fees to social infrastructure like ownership and laws.

the way we engage with discourses of transportation prioritizes the perspective of the driver and treats other options and those who take them primarily as products of being unable to drive. someone who was unable to learn to adapt to the working class dance with debt, work, and traffic and 'lost their momentum', that is, if they ever had any in the first place.

i think a relatively easy early task is to dislodge the driver from their position as universally optimal. part of this is developing an understanding of how the driver finds themselves there. that is what transit infrastructure in a capitalist political economy 'does': it regulates flows - of traffic, of ideas, of capital - to maintain itself through the reproduction of the institutions that sustain it. the complexity of this regulation is beyond the scope of this post and past the point of calling an easy task, but at least the objective of recognizing and challenging the privileges afforded to the driver is straightforward enough

a notion that can help is the idea of design serving a particular subject. cities planned for cars/drivers as opposed to urban design that prioritizes pedestrians, cyclists, or rapid mass transit. youd ideally want to drive partially bc generally pretty much everything is designed to make driving the easiest. you wouldnt want to walk or bus for the same reason

this is getting a little long so im gonna give the classic marxist line that the social conditions arent sufficiently developed for the kind of revolution in human flows i would like to see. people are a little too tied to their debts, jobs, and steering wheels at the moment.

[thegeminisage]

hi i have hair dye advice possibly. as someone whos been dyeing their own hair dumb colours since 2005.

1: you may already know this but when you go to redye your hair make sure it has been shampooed but NOT conditioned. manic panic etc acts a lot like a conditioner so youd have to wash ur hair again w just shampoo before trying to dye again

2: i'd mix the special effects and manic panic together. if you dont have a ton of either just mix the entire amount you have. if you don't think you have enough for your whole head you can mix a little plain conditioner into it but the more conditioner you add the lighter the dye will come out. if you have a tint brush use that to RLLY mix it well. semi permanent dyes generally mix well with each other.

3. if you're concerned about uneven dyeing then i'd dye your whole head again with the mix, putting it on the lighter parts first before moving on to the rest

4. if its still kind of uneven then yeah if you put your hair up no one will notice esp if its in somethign like a bun or a braid Thumbs Up Emoji imo its not ultra drastic and ive def fucked up my own hair way worse

thank you 😭 part of my problem is that i put the dye on LIKE a shampoo instead of doing it row by row bc i cannot See the back of my own head...usually it has uneven spots but never anything this drastic. do you really think i need to shampoo again before dyeing? like, vitally? bc then i'm either dyeing wet hair or letting color treated hair dry (and i'd have to brush it) without any chemical help whatsoever and it's damaged so it tends to snarl and tangle up REALLY badly...i'm worried if i dye it wet it will be more wonky but i CANNOT comb thru it w/o chemical aid, i will be breaking so much of it, i will be bald lol. maybe it turned out wonky this time because i didn't shampoo before dyeing??? i just did it with how it was when i left the salon

i def hope no one notices if i can't get it fixed...i usually do wear it in a bun with a bandana over it to protect it so if it doesn't work thats what im gonna have to do!!!!

[garpond]

this is a weird and annoying one sorry but. realizing my gender can be transed or whatever but the feminine drive to nurture at the expense of ones self is forever apparently. and i dont mean that in a weird bioessentialist way of 'oh the female sex is programmed to be Motherly it is their biological role' etc etc moreso in the sense of like. socially. and the socialization i got growing up, the roles youre expected to play and the 'rewards' they give you and what that does to your brain. and something as pure and innate as love becomes pathologically self-destructive to you when you're raised that way and treated that way. so now im here and im a man but i cannot relate to the men around me who have never had to put others first in a way that matters a single day in their life, whereas i'm the exact opposite. its alienating. and youd think id be tired of it but i'm not. my brain's wired that way now, i talk up my lack of cognitive/emotional empathy and awkwardness as if it frees me from this fate but it doesn't, it just makes me hopelessly addicted to something i'm terrible at. i cant live if i cant help people. i'll do anything to help people. if i don't think i'm helping people as much as i can be what's the point of anything about me? and if i do think i'm helping somebody then i can't get enough of that, i'll go to any length, any extreme to keep being helpful, keep being useful, keep being told i'm kind and understanding and loving and compassionate. is it selfless or selfish? the line is so blurry. it's selfish selflessness. it's desperately filling and filling and filling this huge misogyny shaped gaping hole of need. cis men love to think of us as hopelessly attached and clingy because it helps them forget that they wanted us that way whenever the switch flips and they decide that we're too much. and fuck me because i keep saying 'us' as if i'm still a woman. i know i don't consider myself a real man deep down. that's not news. i have a long way to go before i can do that and before being male is something i can be proud of, anyway. the problem is twofold. and anyway this is just a long messy fucking block of text i am really sorry. i guess im emboldened by the blank slate and the fact that i have like a miniscule amount of followers right now. but yeah have me freaking out because i don't have a man to help and fix and and spoil and devote myself to while simultaneously being disgusted with myself that it's something i actually want/need. not to mention just the general pattern of I Will Help You Or Explode. Badly. i have Always had going on and continues to kick my ass (guy who realized like half of his so called friends only hit him up to rant and do not care about him or anything going on in his life at all)(feels comfortable saying that bc there's no way in fuck any of them read this far)

[icyfox17]

best 5 pieces of advice uve received/read ab

OOOH man uhm .

♤ treating yourself like you would your friend when you're feeling down (etc: would u call ur friend an idiot for forgetting to take out the trash? No, youd probably be understanding. Being kind to urself is very important ❤️)

♤ when u feel like shit, get more sleep (it's surprising how much worse my mental health is when im on a lack of sleep) (...) (just looked at the time) (wHEN DID IT TURN TO 2 AM--)

♤ teaching other ppl what ur learning as a way to study

♤ ASK FOR HELP!!! ALWAYS ASK FOR HELP WHEN YOU DONT UNDERSTAND !! (especially with school... teachers are there for a reason bruh)

♤ for writer's block: just force yourself to write a random prompt, a random idea based off of your surroundings (for me a big reason for my writers block is the pressure of Writing, of it needing to be good. If what im writing is just an exercise, it doesnt Have to be good. It can just Be. And that's the exact thing you need to break the block)

[spikeinthepunch]

i have talked about it to some capacity with the post a made a bit ago about branding etc and hpw i feel about it and how i kinda got swayed into playing things safe with presentation bc of how people on the internet/esp professionals, read you.

which was something i got caught up in especially around my internship because even though i wanted to explore mature topics emotionally, i was still going to play it safe. i had that 'i could make a thing thats emotionally strong like steven universe, but nothing more'. the stuff i wanted to make i treated like that. the idea that anything i was going to make that i wanted to put into the industry i wanted to be in had to be safe enough for studio/execs. which is definitely a problem with current animation- everything needs to be in a certain range of safety.

interestingly i felt like i did escape this a few years ago- i was no longer caught up in getting a job in 2020 and all the complicated feelings about "i dont want to cater myself to kids because i dont want to make stuff for kids" hit hard by then after turning 21. i was drawing lots of nsfw (...which you guys here didnt see lol), i was letting myself make stories without any regard to a specific audience esp bc the wcrp i was doing gave me time to think about that in my free time. and the way i presented myself, in terms of my posts, did not hesitate on topics either.

which the recent (1 or 2~ years) change in branding that led up to the mikike 'mascot' i realize now that attaching to a mascot like this kinda entirely redirected my presentation. not exactly in terms of topics on my normal blogging (however i did stop posting a lot in general) but you know. the livestreaming nd video making, and in turn the way i would interact with the places people use for online marketing/audience building. interestingly, before mikike but when i had my website, i started my website with the intent of it being a place outside of social media where i could "do what i wanted without anxiety of whether or not i could post it". and uh, somehow i managed to do the opposite.

because eventually i felt like online presence wise, using mikike as a mascot to front me and my website, would be good! seemed simple enough. but then i ended up feeding into the cutesy design or more, felt like i had to present with this neutral design, one that would appeal to "everyone" which... sent me back to that mindset again. its a horrible conflicting mess when part of me was trying to be like "yes i want to post whatever on my own site!" and then "oh no im becoming a general audience streamer and play minecraft, i dont want people to see that stuff if they go to my website" (with the added, if i start to get involved with other people too, i would be nervous about them being aware of my website and ruining my rep). should be said, its not like i *am* posting anything egregious either- but theres inherent anxiety based off how people respond online in general, like im wanting on ice all the time regardless.

so suddenly i was back where i started. i really really wanted to hang on to this drive to get out there, make the videos i have in mind, etc. but in my head i get very caught up in whether or not my stuff will gain traction and then be criticized for things i cant control (the age of people, or just whether or not someone take some mature content i made as 'problematic'). reality is i need to not care-- but i have said it time and time again. it is SO hard as someone who grew up during 2014-2016 tumblr. because if you were there youd know how hellish this era was with its callout culture. it was insane, truly. and i like many other teens, felt like i needed to be loud and out there to judge problematic behavior in order to not be problematic, and be self aware all the time and to always judge my interests, and in turn be paranoid i may like something bad.

the urge to rebrand is built off of detaching from the image/mascot that is making me "play it safe". part of me is annoyed that i want to drop this overall look- i do like mikike, i do like the colors! theyre nice. buuut i do feel like i want something fresh. i have admittedly change my look quite a few times so, maybe this is just how i am too. idk.

[astyrluna]

im well and truly back in my fnaf arc heres what kinda animatronic id be at the pizzaplex

astyr owl, colour+design based on my sona, of course. hed be in charge of a big ol library. his whole thing would be that theres nowhere to hide in his area, BUT hes not automatically aggro. hell only aggro if theres too much noise, e.g. sprinting, causing distractions in his area, etc. and he aggros on EVERYONE. the other animatronics can go into his area but theyll attract his attention, and after a short time hell aggro on them, booting them out of the library (or simply slowing them down if theyre chasing greg). if greg goes back to being quiet (i.e. sneaking) while astyr is going after an animatronic, astyr will automatically de-aggro once theyre gone. freddy can go into the library, but hes treated the same as the other animatronics, and, like moon, astyr can get greg even if hes piloting freddy, so its not the best idea. astyr cant leave the library but he can see everywhere inside, perched up on a pedestal in the middle of the big, cylinder shaped room. he has full motion of his head/neck. while traversing the library, hes always looking at gregory. you can tell hes getting aggro when his eyes change colour. they start blue, then purple, then red, and if you make noise while theyre red, he goes on the hunt, and the only way to stop the hunt is to leave the library. or, yknow. die. hell go back down aggro levels with time and resets when you leave the library. not sure how youd decommission him or what youd take from him, or if you even could tbh. all i can think of would be something stealth related which. freddy doesnt really need? the glamrocks dont attack him so he wouldnt need to stealth around them, and getting something the improve stealth for gregory himself doesnt make sense. idk, maybe you just. wouldnt decommission astyr, but instead you find the hoodie right by him? like, if you get onto his pedestal the present is there . i dunno ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

[aropride]

no we are not going to kill anyone

fictive introjects aren't literally blorbo from your show and expecting them to act exactly the same as blorbo is weird

introjects who arent fictives exist also

u cant just demand someone else fronts it's rude and weird. also talking to a system isn't really a choose your own adventure type of thing

no there isn't an "evil alter"

persecutor alters do exist and are common but they arent evil alters and should be treated with the same respect youd treat anyone else

some systems have like 2 or 3 members and others have hundreds. its generally not ur business why a system has the amount of alters they do

u arent entitled to know whos fronting 24/7. a lot of systems dont even always know whos fronting let alone want to share

switching is often not obvious or dramatic at all. it can be but generally it's not.though it does depend if someone has a more overt or covert presentation

did isnt actually that rare. around 1.5% of people are diagnosed with did and it goes undiagnosed a lot. and 1.5% is around the same amount of people who have red hair or ocd or green eyes

you have absolutely no way of knowing if someone is "faking" or lying about being a system. "what about-" nope not even if they do that. almost everything that people claim make it obvious someones lying (nonhuman alters, bigger systems, overt presentation etc) are just... ways that systems exist. ur not in their head, u dont get to decide what theyre experiencing

no we arent possessed

yes it is a real disorder

people have got to get normaler about systems

[jorstar]

im gunna do a little psa on how buy one get one sales work using examples from a customer that uses our pickup dept to shop and has done it incorrectly each time and treats me like im stupid and we messed up her order :) 

also from more of a pickup perspective but im pretty sure it all applies to normal in store check out and in others stores not just my chain.

if youre buying buy one/buy 2 etc get one free products through a pickup service do it exactly how you would do it if you went through the store. the best way i explain it to people is order how much you want to leave with. so if you want bogo bread you would bring 2 ( if you want to pay for 2 and get 2 free you bring up 4 yada yada) up to the cashier and it will be taken off when the sale goes through, and you can always ask the cashier to double check. so my first example using this lady is she ordered 2 pork loins that where bogo i take her order out and shes asks where her other pork loins are “it says you ordered 2″ “well i wanted 4″ “then you should order 4 we cant just assume and add 2 on without your permission” “ well why not thats stupid” :)))))))))) “BECAUSE what if you DIDNT want 4 and only 2, then you wouldve been charged for shit u didnt order and then youd have to come back for a refund and say why did u give me 4 when i only ordered 2 u idiots are you trying to scam me :))))” (ok did not say that last part but in hindsight is still a good explanation) “well now im going to have to comeback later and get the other 2″ hmmm sounds like a learning experience! :) spoiler: it was not. 

the only time we add stuff on is when someone orders only one of a buy one get one product and we will only add it on carside where we’ll say this was buy one get one but you only ordered one and we’ll usually get  “oh i didnt know that! cool!” or “oh i thought thats what i did? did i do it wrong” or “no, i only need one”

and lastly a lot of bogo can be mix and match meaning they dont have to be the same product. a lot of the time the tag on the shelf will say get one free of equal or lesser value. so what the lady did today when i brought out to her was ask where her missing vitamins were. i thought they were straight up missing so i went back to our room to see if there was a missing bag and she came to our door saying she got the vitamins she ordered she just didnt get the free ones. me, whos shift is over and just wants to get out of here, says “ :))) ok, ill have to go grab those for you then :)))” she ordered like..5 different kinds of vitamins. one of each of course! so whoever picked them for her probably saw the equal or lesser value tag and thought thats what she was doing. but nope! we just have to know somehow that she actually wanted 2 of each! so i gave her the other vitamins she wanted FOR FREE bc i had already processed the payment before she brought up missing stuff. and then she was kinda pissed off when i brought them out and had her check that i had everything like lady you essentially only paid for 3 OF THE 10 OF THESE. I HOPE YOU LOOK AT YOUR RECEIPT LATER AND FEEL FUCKING STUPID. maybe when this has happened to you  a couple times maybe maybemmabye mmmaybe MAYBE! its not us :)

this wasnt really an educational moment out the goodness of my heart i just wanted to rant about dis lady

[kingmojomonkey]

Long Personal Post

it really is so weird trying to figure out the vibe if someone is comfortable with me being gay/ if theyre homophobic (like i know it doesnt matter if theyre comfortable but yeah) in my uni friend group before today only 1 of my closer friends knew and that was because she had mentioned previously dating girls and she had a pride badge on her bag so i felt like she was safe idk, my other closet friend doesn't know and even though ive never heard her say anything remotely bad, i would be afraid because of her religion that she would treat me differently or stop hanging around with me and i dont want that because i really value her friendship. The others in the friend group don't know because I've either heard them say off hand things or else they have that like weird fetishism of gay men, the only guy in the group (straight) doesn't know because we never really talked about relationships or whatever apart from i did react a bit too enthusiastically one day when we were talking about childhood crushes and he mentioned megan fox in transformers. But yeah the point is today me and friend (f) from uni were talking about this fella she's starting to see and we were talking about dating apps, shes one of the only other single person out of my friends and is more similar to me in the way she would rather have like a proper date or relationship before starting to sleep with someone, in anyways we'll discuss the dates or creeps in pubs or whatever the odd time and today when we were talking about hinge and actually going on first dates, i got the vibe that she was actually chill (she didn't say anything but i just felt she wouldnt be judgy or weird) so after talking about a fella i used to talk to i slipped in about an awkward coffee date i had with a woman and she said about her awkward date with some other fella then just asked me if i was bisexual (not going to lie did have a sec of panic before i said yes) and she just goes oh i would of never have known and i just said yeah because i don't really get into relationships or whatever i don't really need to bring it up and then she just asked did anyone else know and i said oh close friend knows but no one else does, but then my bus came so i never really got to say anything else or see her reaction more, guess I'll find out next time we have an class if she acts differently around me, but it felt good being actually able to say it to her because when we were talking about apps and dating and all i did feel like i was holding back but it is mad that you can straight up have the vibe of who you can say it to and who youd never say it to. It is mad though that like im 24 now and still worrying about coming out to certain people etc.

[stupid-o-clock]

i still feel shitty around my friends. i ranted about this to my best friend earlier but i want to put this here so i'll basically copy paste my feelings.

i'm gonna call my friends P & V bc typing "friend"/"other friend" etc gets confusing after a while.

i was playing huniepop bc it's a fun game when u have nothing to do, but my P saw it in my discord status and immediately dmed the gc "BRO [me] IS PLAYING HUNIEPOP" and we started arguing about it bc she thinks these type of games are weird, idc lol. if u don't like them, don't play them, why get into my business? we have the most opposite opinions on so much shit like why even bother trying to start this

she complained about genshin nsfw popping up on her tl a while ago and told me to stop liking it, no? dont interact, click "not interested", block, even unfollow me idc not like we interact much anyway. gosh

she was so much better to have as a friend before we got close, i started having this feeling recently like once i get to know someone well it becomes weird. like damn, you know my trauma and ik yours? weirdo.. bye-bye! my gf, two best friends + two also pretty close friends are the only exceptions. but that's maybe because i got to know them before i started feeling like this?

tbh with these two it always feels like they've got something against me for no reason, that "no reason" also being im a dude. with all the shit they say n do it's a really toxic women>men type thing LOL and i can never say anything bc they'd team up on me!!

i don't think i'm ever included in those messages but thats bc im trans. if i was a cis dude theyd bully me into the ground, but i dont wanna be treated diff bc im a TRANS guy, im just a guy. the trans doesnt matter. treat me the same youd treat a cis one. and if you cant then we shouldnt be friends!

now this is about V and her boyfriend, theyve got a thing like he unfriends/blocks anyone she doesnt like going on. n one night he wanted her to unf all the dudes shes friends with, including me. personally idgaf but P got really pissed about it.

P said smth like "what did we say about not controlling women in relationships?" and like.. what? V is essentially controlling her boyfriend, so why can't he do the same? P just brushed it off tho bc V is an angel! and she could never do anything bad! her bf don't know that lol?

just like how i'm deffo not a love interest for her, everyone she makes him unfriend probably also isn't! maybe she got bad vibes or whatever that's ok! but god

also P used the r-slur when going off at V's boyfriend and that just rubbed me the wrong way. she's definitely "allowed" to use/reclaim it but it feels like an awful word, AND she was using it to insult someone which makes it even worse.

i feel like i can never disagree with P either bc she'll pull a "shut up ur a man" card. like- she's done that. she's done it as a joke but she'd deffo do it in a serious manner too-

also, i got into a fight- like- not a fight but i genuinely said smth really LOL i feel bad about it but P was shit talking me to xiya and then pulled up in my dms like Hey [me] i care aout you! You fucked up but it's ok u ust have to learn how to communicate

Like what is this? u can't tell me u care about me after spewing this shit into my girlfriends dms.

"i dont go out of my way to hurt people. he needs help lol" like bitch ik i need help. i did say the "joke" with intent to hurt V but it was in the MOMENT. yk how fucking frustrating it is explaining anger issues to someone who doesn't get it whatsofuckingever?

P has a load of her own issues that i dont ge tbut i at least TRY to understand her. also, first screenshot i wanetd to explain myself so V could see where im coming from?? LOL explaining ursef =/= makinf urself the victim.

i always overexplain shit, like my mistakes and why i think i made them. im also bad at explaining so i go on and on to try and make it make sense. i was literally blaming myself for hurting V and syaing sorry over and over again, how the hell was i making myself a victim?