#trauma moment for mmc

[squishykitty825]

Darkest night

Dark shadows swirl around my shaking body. The thin desert tree I hide behind towers into the sky with its brothers and sisters. Its branches reach the sky, brushing the clouds in a way that no skyscraper ever will. Rain-heavy clouds swarm over the crescent moon.

Soft light from the moon and the stars filters through the clouds onto the hiking path to my right. A breeze rustles the leaves of the scattered trees and stout shrubbery, carrying the tune of a long forgotten song that only the wind could remember.

My heart pounds wildly in my chest.

They’re dead.

They’re both dead. Because of him. Because of the man who chases me through the narrow streets of the city I’ve sworn to protect. The man who’s haunted my memories without my consent—though I did not know the face or the name, until now. And now I’m among the desert squirrels and bushes on the outskirts of the city, the massive shape of the Hollywood sign looming above me as I pause, trying to catch my breath. I’ve faced worse things than this, I know I have. But something about this is different. Something about this has my mind racing, running a loop around itself again and again. I know what it is, but I do not acknowledge it for fear of getting lost in the depths of my memories of the ones I lost to this man—this monster.

I strain my ears, trying to listen. Trying to hear anything above the silence that echoes loudly through the near-barren landscape around me. Nothing but the chirping of crickets. It’s too soon for me to breathe out a sigh of relief. And I cannot believe that the man who killed my sister would have stopped the chase.

Blood drips down the side of my face from my temple where the wooden bat had collided with my head. The crimson liquid mixes with the salty droplets of sweat that gathered on my skin as I ran.

My breaths are loud in my ears. The rasping sound mixing with the gentle hush of the light wind trailing through the currents around me. A cluster of stars shines brightly through a gap in the clouds a moment before the rain starts, turning the sandy dirt at my feet to mud in a matter of seconds as the drizzle quickly turns to a heavy rain. Thick drops of rain land on my exertion-hot skin, cooling it.

Hearing no sounds of pursuit, I lean against the tree and thrust my hand into my pocket in search of my phone. I need to call her. I was supposed to meet her, and being ambushed on my way home was not on my agenda.

Shit. I can’t find my phone.

I must have dropped it somewhere in my hurry to get away.

Taking in my surroundings, I’m surprised at how far I ran to get away from the man chasing me. I must have run over a mile to have reached the outskirts of the city.

My shallow breaths become deeper as my heart begins to slow its racing beat, the adrenaline leaving my system slower than it had come. Goosebumps erupt over my skin under the icy touch of the rain. Looking back at the path I’d taken, I feel the dread roiling in my gut at the thought of retracing my steps to find my phone.

Cursing under my breath, I know it’s a bad idea. A terrible idea, really. 

Whatever, I can buy myself a new phone later. For now, I need to get back to the main part of the city and find a payphone or something. Except… I curse under my breath, again. I left my wallet in my office. All this time spent focused on figuring out Typhon’s next move has left me distracted and forgetful.

Blowing out a deep breath, I trudge through the light mud, forging a new path back to the city without taking the same route I’d run to get here.

My hair is plastered to my face as I try not to shiver against the cold. The suit jacket I wear is thoroughly soaked through, as is the white shirt beneath it. I must look like a drowned rat. All things considered though, I am glad for that. Grateful that I am still able to feel this miserable—that I escaped the psychopath chasing me—because the alternative would mean leaving Rissy alone in this world. Her parents—my sister and her husband—were taken by the monster who decided to make me his next target, and I will not let her lose another parent. 

My feet freeze in place as I hear something behind me.

No.

No no no.

He couldn’t have found me already.

My heart is once again pounding in my chest as I continue walking, this time faster. The pace at which I walk increases until I’m suddenly running again, trying not to slip in the mud as I race for the sprawled out houses of the suburbs. If I can just reach them maybe I can find someone willing to help, to call the police.

Slick mud slides beneath my feet as I round the corner of a house, nearly taking me to the ground with how slippery it is. I can hear Blake’s vocie in my head as I stumble down the small alley between the houses, You gonna let yourself lose to a girl, Christian? Their spar from the other day had left his blood thrumming. She was a skilled fighter and has beaten me mercilessly on the mat. But she was also a fierce leader, offering tips to fix my form and encouragement after each defeat. 

Don’t let your guard down just because I’m a smaller opponent.

Keep fighting, Christian. Maybe someday you’ll reach my level.

Something hard hits the back of my head, sending sparks of pain through my skull and creating black spots in my vision. I stumble, almost faling to my knees as I am forced to come to a halt, nausea eating away at the world around me, making it spin and spin and spin.

I’m sorry Blake, I think as the darkness grows bigger, my body swaying. I don’t think this is a fight I’ll win.

Darkness in my vision twinkles as I blink, staring up at the night sky through the gap in the clouds. The stars are soon blocked out by the shape of a man standing over me. A monster with a monstrous smile who kneels next to me and puts a hand to my throat, pressing hard until I feel myself falling into oblivion.

[sjmgirlie]

"Azriel's darkness this" "Azriel's darkness that"

Is this all people think this character is?

Considering all the instances we have been provided where his friends don't even push him/don't really try and get him to talk to them about pretty much anything, I'd say we don't know much about Azriel at all.

It's the same with any character that we haven't got a POV from. Do we really know Elain well enough to make judgements? Mor even? Not really.

What we understand about their characters is what we have seen/heard in dialogue in other POVs.

The thing I love about Azriel (and Elain for that matter) is that they have been portrayed as fixed. He is a broody and mysterious Shadowsinger that has went through trauma his whole life. Elain has been stifled but shown time and time again that she is not what people think she is. (There is a whole bonus chapter alluding to it that people like to completely forget).

Azriel has darkness, he has shadows, he is broody and doesn't say much. But what else is he from what we have seen?

He is heroic, he is self sacrificing, he deeply cares for the people in his life, and he is actually a good person. Even if he is the Spymaster and torturer of the NC. You know what else we see?

We see him having absolutely no self worth. We see him struggle with feeling inadequate for anyone. Mor has told us this, Azriel has as well in the BC. He feels UNWORTHY.

Why do you think he completely let Elain make the moves in the POV? He doesn't think he is worthy. He doesn't believe himself to be. And Rhys saying "you think you deserve to be her mate?" is literally a knife in the gut for a character like Azriel.

Azriel has shown time and time again that he cares for the females in the books I dare say more than most of the other characters. This is not an accident. This is (I believe) directly correlated with how his mother was treated.

We see countless instances of Azriel proving this with violence, because well, is he a talker like Rhys? No. He carries a lot of self worth in his ability to hurt someone clearly. Of being needed in ways only related to his work and abilities. And don't get me started on imagining what Rhys' father did to him mentally during the time he was under his command.

Yes, Azriel has darkness. But literally EVERY character in this book has darkness. Saying that Azriel's LI is solely determined based off "who can handle the darkness" is placing Azriel's character in a box with no growth. And that's not an SJM character. They all grow.

His LI will help him realize that he is NOT darkness. That there is light in the darkness that he does not see. That he doesn't need to "handle" it or have someone to "handle" it. That Azriel is just AZRIEL. That he doesn't need to be anyone else. He doesn't need to pretend all the time. He doesn't need to wear a mask every moment of his life.

Who looked to him when first meeting him as a comfort? Who did not balk from him? Who has called his scars, which he is insecure about, beautiful? Who noticed his headaches? Who enjoys just sitting in silence while enjoying someones company? Who has been showing Azriel he is wanted?

Read the series again if you don't remember.

Reducing Azriel to darkness is the same thing as reducing Elain to flowers/gardening.

Anyways, a long post again but please don't reduce Azriel to darkness because you are literally just feeding into the actual narrative he holds for himself as shown by the author rather than realizing that's the exact healing journey he is going to take. To realize he isn't just darkness. That he himself has a light.

Edit to add additional thoughts:

Main characters in SJM books, specifically ACOTAR, are always presented in a boxed view until they either get a book or are the MC in one. We got Rhys as the MMC in ACOMAF through feyre’s PoV, and we got Nesta and Cassian in their own.

Complex main characters will not have their healing arcs explored or even completely explained in someone else’s POV. Food for thought.

[acourtofthought]

The e/riel near kiss nearly didn't happened. Had Elain not chosen to deliver his gift to his pile of presents at that moment, he would have never run into her.

And that means Az would have continued on as he had for the last year, choosing to jerk off to the image of banging her instead of actually.... oh I don't know, asking her out on a date or something? Trying to spend time with her in real life instead of being content with relegating her to a sexual object in his fantasies?

There was nothing stopping him from spending time with her, getting to know her on a deeper level. Absolutely nobody stopped them the previous Solstice so why exactly did he turn around and avoid her after that? Because he couldn't handle her bond? Is that a MMC doing right by a FMC? It tortured Rhys to see Feyre with Tamlin knowing they were sleeping together and engaged yet he still chose to spend those weeks with her, encouraging her to train, teaching her how to read.

Az put himself first, he didn't put Elain first. Not her well-being after the death of her father, during her fights with Nesta, after her own admission that she still has trauma.

Az chose to treat her only as a sexual object for an entire year over trying to be her friend.

And really, that's all I need to know about why he's not worthy to be Elain's endgame.

[evajackslover]

MY THOUGHTS ON ACOMAF AS A FIRST TIME READER 🌌✨🏔️🌙

**this review will contain spoilers for acotar and acomaf**

my rating: 4.7/5 ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️💫

spice level: 4/5 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️

summary: Feyre has undergone more trials than one human woman can carry in her heart. Though she's now been granted the powers and lifespan of the High Fae, she is haunted by her time Under the Mountain and the terrible deeds she performed to save the lives of Tamlin and his people. As her marriage to Tamlin approaches, Feyre's hollowness and nightmares consume her. She finds herself split into two different one who upholds her bargain with Rhysand, High Lord of the feared Night Court, and one who lives out her life in the Spring Court with Tamlin. While Feyre navigates a dark web of politics, passion, and dazzling power, a greater evil looms. She might just be the key to stopping it, but only if she can harness her harrowing gifts, heal her fractured soul, and decide how she wishes to shape her future-and the future of a world in turmoil.

i finished reading book 2 in the acotar series (a court of mist and fury) a few days ago, and it’s safe to say acomaf is an amazing sequel to the first book!! i absolutely adored how sjm developed the characters and love where book 2 has brought the plot!

here are my thoughts:

- feyre’s character development in book 2 was just *chef’s kiss*! her deal with rhys in acotar was the perfect set up for acomaf because with each visit feyre made to the night court, she slowly begin to heal from her trauma under the mountain. this was a huge contrast from whenever she returned to the spring court; you could tell she immediately began to relapse into a bad mental and physical state, and was clearly feeling trapped.

- this brings me to tamlin… who finally showed us his true colors! i could not STAND how overprotective he was of feyre upon returning from under the mountain. like, i get the guy had some traumatic experiences, but those were no excuse for TRAPPING FEYRE IN THE HOUSE upon so much other physical and emotional abuse! the moment mor came to whisk her away to the night court had to have been one of the best moments of relief in acomaf.

- morrigan!!! i absolutely LOVE her as a character and her relationship with the other members of rhysand’s inner court! i can’t wait for her and feyre to become even closer bffs :)

- cassian and azriel 🥰🥰 my babies protect them at all costs (also am i right in guessing a cassian nesta relationship coming soon?! because i can totally see it!)

- and finally rhysand!! i cannot express how much i love how his story has expanded throughout acomaf; from teaching feyre to read to confessing his undying love to her, he is the most perfect MMC 🥹

i wish i had room to discuss each and every character, but this post has already gotten so long!

my final thoughts: amazing and can’t wait to keep reading! my only complaint is the spice (i prefer slightly less in my books) but i understand that it is not a YA series and the level of spice was to be expected before starting the series! i’m in the middle of acowar right now and can’t wait to continue feyre’s story!

beautifulll feysand art by the lovely jrtart_ on instagram 💓

[phantomdialogue]

˗ˏˋ. ݁₊ ✶ ˖ 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐛𝐲 𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐢𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐫 - 𝟒.𝟐𝟓/𝟓 ☆ . ݁ ˖ˎˊ˗

chestnut springs book five

premise: since beau eaton came back from his last, and final, deployment, he hasn't been the same. he's lost his purpose and feels adrift from his family. bailey jansen has always been the black sheep in chestnut springs, cast out by everyone for her family's criminal history. when beau makes a bet with bailey that her last name isn't what the problem is, that her luck wouldn't change if she took his instead, he quickly learns that faking an engagement might not be as hard as he once thought.

couple: beau eaton and bailey jansen

tropes: fake engagement, age gap, virgin fmc, (small amount of) betting, military/veteran mmc

available on kindle unlimited

review below!

review:

i am pleasantly surprised by this book. i burned through it in two days and really fell so in love with the characters. still can't rate it as high as theo and cade as they are extremely near and dear to my heart but i really found myself loving beau. i've seen a lot of people rank this as last or second to last for the series but i think that it deserves a little more love. admittedly, i went into the book with a little bit of apprehension simply because with the way that beau was set up in book three and then ignored in book four, it felt odd to come back to him. however, i completely understand why elsie silver did it now that i'm done.

beau was a surprise of a love interest for me. i was worried that the book was going to lean into the over the top tortured veteran trope and i feel like there wasn't a lot of that. obviously he's got some pretty deep trauma as anyone would but it felt really natural instead of just pouring on the angst. bailey was in a similar way. i think it can be so easy to read a character like her with self-worth issues and want to yell at the book telling her to just get her head together but it's handled really beautifully. rather than finding her constant doubt annoying, the way that it's written really makes you sympathize for her and understand why she thinks like that.

i love this series... i wasn't expecting to love this series half as much as i did. it's easily a 5 star series for me and that really did shock me but i'm so so happy about it. i could read about 10 more books with these characters. i want a harvey book even if his story was covered as a b plot in some ways. i want a book that is literally just the girls all going out and having fun and stuff. i'd read a book just of the men being stubborn idiots and corrected by their wives/fiancees all the time. i'll read the spin off series' eventually but i truly am just so in love with these characters that saying goodbye to them is incredibly bittersweet.

q & a:

are they endgame? - they need therapy. without a doubt. BUT i don't think they break up and i think they are happy together endgame. i think the need for therapy comes on an individual level rather than them needing to seek it as a couple. they have done a good job at helping each other up to this point but i think long term they'll need professional help and there is nothing wrong with that. so yes, they are endgame but they will both need to seek therapy eventually.

did i cringe? - i don't think so. there were some awkward moments but nothing that outright made me cringe.

favorite part? - this was the perfect ending to the series - an ending that made me cry and was perfect. it really felt like the closing book in a comforting way. i feel like a lot of the plot lines for the majority of the characters were finished in reckless but then this went ahead and finalized everything with beau and bailey (because elsie silver doesn't just introduce a character and then throw them away. i've been waiting for bailey's moment since she appeared in flawless all the way at the start) along with any little tidbits left over for everyone else and of course, sweet harvey. it wrapped everything up with a beautiful bow and i am so heartbroken to leave these characters in the most bittersweet way.

least favorite part? - i wish that beau and jasper's friendship was explored a bit more. that's the main thing that stood out to me as something that irked me a bit. i liked the way that the virginity aspect was handled because i feel like that can often be poorly done but i just wish there was a bit more jasper and beau. i think it was set up in book three a lot but we didn't quite get to fully see their dynamic in person and so i was hoping to see it here. we got some small moments but i would have liked a little more.

favorite quotes (some spoilers here, of course, but minimal):

One who starts pulling up a stool every Sunday through Tuesday to drink chamomile tea until midnight, so I don’t have to close by myself.

“If we’re struggling, we’re still in motion, yeah? Heading somewhere better. That’s what I keep telling myself anyway.”

“I know you’re scared of losing control around me.” Her chin tips up as though she’s told me something that will make me back down. Run me off. It doesn’t. “No, I’m scared of you becoming something I can’t live without.”

“Bailey. I’m not ignoring you.” She licks her lips. “You should.” “Impossible. I’m memorizing you,”

“You’re relentless, you know that?” And I just give her a salute and a wink. Because yeah, I am. No one has ever showed up for Bailey, but she’s about to get the full experience. “No, sugar. When it comes to you, I’m downright hopeless.”

"That’s how I know I’ll love you in every version of yourself, because we’re all constantly changing. Growing. Becoming."

"Without you, this version of me doesn’t exist. Without the next version of you, the next version of me doesn’t exist either. We’re going to grow together."

“This is . . . this doesn’t feel like alone together. This just feels like together-together.”

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Every week I will post various reviews I've written so far in 2024. You can check out my Goodreads for more up-to-date reviews HERE. You can friend me on Goodreads here.

Have you read any of these? What were your thoughts?

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313. Daydream by Hannah Grace--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

DAYDREAM gave me something that the last book in this series didn't: similar vibes to ICEBREAKER. And while this makes a lot of sense as to why some people didn't like this one and ICEBREAKER but loved the second book, I am the complete opposite because I LOVED ICEBREAKER.

Much like the first book in this series, there was some great communication and mutual understanding. There was an understanding about mental health and understanding boundaries. Despite both characters coming in with anxious personalities, they were both incredibly good at working together (even though the FMC definitely needed therapy for her people pleasing that grew from trauma.)

I'm glad that our beloved MMC was able to find someone who understood him and I'm glad our overworked and new to us FMC was able to find solace in her love interest, especially after that toxic af ex-boyfriend.

There was some great representation in this about how everyone learns differently, some diversity in the characters, that there is beauty in different body types, and that everyone has a different way of handling stress. And strangely enough, even though the two MCs had good communication between each other, it was shown how difficult communication CAN be when you feel like everyone is pressuring you to communicate.

And while the friends to lovers dynamic was awesome, that spice was SPICY. Loved the consent and the way the MMC respected the FMC's decisions and went at her pace.

I also really appreciated Grace's note on how some people choose to live their lives undiagnosed because it's true--sometimes finding coping mechanisms to help you day to day feels like enough.

I'm excited to see what's next in this universe!

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314. Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata & Ginny Tapley Takemori (Translator)--⭐️⭐️⭐️

Reading this after EARTHLINGS made me notice a few things about this author. Both MCs deal with social ostracizing and emotional dissociation. Both meet men who meet their "freak" and then takes it to the next level, and both have families that exert a concerning level of control over the MC.

There's is a trend. And like I told my friend, I'm glad I read this after EARTHLINGS because in seeing these connections, it's helped me understand how we got from this--an emotionless woman who mimics those around her in order to maintain her status as "part of society"--to the nightmarish events of EARTHLINGS.

CONVENIENCE STORE WOMAN, on the surface, is a simple story of a woman who finds comfort in her part-time job working in a convenience store. When she meets a man who wants to "leave the stone age" and find himself a sugar mama (not said in so many words), that's when she starts to question the life she's made for herself. And I'll be honest, I'm happy with what she ends up doing in the end--it was a nice full circle moment (kind of like how EARTHLINGS had a bizarre full circle moment as well).

One of the things I do like about Murata's writing is her commentary on society. Her writing may be a bit odd and off-putting, but having her characters be outsiders really offers insight into how role-obsessed and behaviour-obsessed society is. If you don't have a partner and a child, have you truly succeeded in life? If you don't have an office job or "adult job", have you truly succeeded? If you don't fit the standards of what it means to be "normal", can you ever really fit in? Even though it's done in a roundabout way, Murata explores and celebrates these differences in CONVENIENCE STORE WOMAN. By putting her anti-social MCs beside her societally acceptable characters, we get to see just how different they are and since we usually only get the POV of the anti-social character, we truly get to see how odd normality might seem to someone who finds it an impossible goal.

Or maybe this was just a novella with some really weird and obsessive characters. But I choose to think that there is more to Murata's writing--especially when I'm seeing parallels in two characters from two wholly different works of fiction.

I still want to read more of her work, if only to see what other similarities her future characters will have. Also, I think that this being a commentary on Japanese society (which I am not a part of) makes it even more fascinating because so much of it can also be applied to Western society.

I'd recommend this if you want a small bite of a book with some pretty big concepts and underlining topics. If you want to subject yourself to EARTHLINGS, I weirdly recommend reading that before this.

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315. Same Time Next Summer by Annabel Monaghan--⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

After reading my first Annabel Monaghan novel earlier this year, I decided that I must read more of her work and, as expected, SAME TIME NEXT SUMMER didn't disappoint. One of the things I absolutely enjoy about this author's writing is how the pacing of the story completely steals your attention and you can't help but fall head first into the romance and connection between the characters.

As I'm writing this review, I am blasting STICK SEASON and I'm realizing that it would have been the perfect song for these two characters when they first broke up when they were teenagers. While I DO wish we had a bit more time to settle into this lost and heartbreak, there were still instances throughout the book where the tension between them was palpable--even though there was someone else in the middle.

And I have such a complicated relationship with books that have love triangles. Sometimes the characters end up with a wholly new person, but sometimes I'll encounter ones like the one in SAME TIME NEXT SUMMER, where the love was just interrupted for a few years and it is a no-brainer where the story is going to go. I liked seeing how awkward the FMC was around her childhood love and I liked how he was acting all nonchalant, but you knew he was sort of dying on the inside.

What I did really enjoy about this one is that the relationship grew organically--it wasn't too quick or disrespectful, it happened organically and over some time where the FMC struggled when coming to terms with who she had become and who she wanted to be.

One of the things that took me a bit to get used to was the back and forth of the past and present, especially because the narrative voice changed from first person to third person and we got the MMC's perspective. I was NOT a fan of the reason for the breakup and how it all was resolved (the situation not the breakup). Call me pessimistic and in desperate need of therapy, but I don't think it could ever be that simple.

That being said, this was one of those romances you'd definitely want for the beach. It wasn't life-changing, but it was nicely paced, just the right length to stay entertaining, and was cute enough that it would go great with some summer sunshine, that salty beach water, and memories made with family on the sand (or by the pool).

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316. Secret of the Water Dragon by Tracey West & Damien Jones (Illustrator)--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I will probably not continue with this series after this one, but I still thought this one was adorable! I loved that there is so much exploration of other cultures. I think it's so important to see this in books for younger readers!

I think this is also the book in the early years of the series where you really start to learn a bit more about the lore of the world. We also got to learn more about the other characters. I can see why so many littles are absolutely loving this series--it's adventurous, full of empathy, and honestly, I can see it being challenging enough for younger readers that it keeps them hooked--especially because it doesn't use overly childish and simple words. Plus, it has adventures and is a cohesive story.

Now I feel more confident when recommend this series to some of my little customers!

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317. Cherry Magic! Volume 12 by Yuu Toyota--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I love how these two support each other and how we see their imperfections. It's one of the things I've always loved about them and as the series progresses, they only get better and better at it--especially because they get to know more about each other.

And I liked the second couple in this because we will finally see them facing the truth! I'm excited to see where their story takes them, especially because of that cliffhanger. I think it's definitely going to take a bit of work to get that couple to their happy ending.

Basically, this whole volume was great for the communication between the couples and because we got to see the dynamics of each couple. I

don't know how many more volumes there will be, but I wonder how Toyota will bring everything together by the end!

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318. The Beauty of Us by Farzana Doctor

I received a copy of this book from the publisher

THE BEAUTY OF US was a book with many different layers. Being set in the 80s alone offered some intriguing commentary, especially because the main cast of characters were very diverse--which I can only imagine what life was like back then as a minority. Another great layer was the dark academia atmosphere that was haunted by the ghost of a past teacher and a life-altering mystery that has some powerful consequences. I found that THE BEAUTY OF US would make a great Autumn read, to be completely honest.

One of the strongest parts of this book was that it was written in multiple perspectives, giving us a very rounded sense of what was happening. We not only got to learn about the different experiences had in this school, but we also were given insight into how the big mystery of the book eventually affected these characters in different ways.

Another strong part of THE BEAUTY OF US were the core themes of the book surrounding families (found and biological), tradition, language, race, and culture. This school was such a wonderful collection of students from all over the world and since it's set in a small Canadian town in the 80s, I was surprised. But there are obviously moments of racism and one particular character just being a vile person--however, I also understand that she was a teenager and a product of her upbringing and who she surrounded herself with.

THE BEAUTY OF US straddles that fine line of young adult and adult--sometimes veering a little more into the adult side. Some of the topics, like the inappropriate relationship between two characters that is an abuse of power, may be a bit on the older side BUT I also think it's important for teens to read these stories. They might find parallels in their own experiences--not just in the inappropriate relationship, but in how they perceive themselves when surrounded by others who don't look like them or come from similar backgrounds.

Read this if you like dark academia set in the 80s that features a lot of diversity, multiple POVs, and deeper topics that might straddle that line between young adult and new adult.

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319. The Guernsey Literary & Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This book is so outside my usual preferred genres that I didn't know what to expect. I've had it on my shelves for YEARS, but finally gave in when I saw the audiobook at the library. And let me tell you, I was SURPRISED. Although it wasn't perfect, I enjoyed the hell out of this book. I loved that the island was like a character in itself and it demanded to be written about!

I don't know how Mary Ann Shaffer did it, but she managed to add so much emotion and character into an epistolary novel. Even though the beginning of the book took me some time to get into, I found myself sinking into the story as it progressed. I wanted the MC to succeed in her story searching adventures, but I especially became invested when she was mailed a letter from one of the members of the society.

I do this thing with books that have romance where I try to guess who will be the eventual capturer of the MC's heart and I immediately knew who he would be in this one, mainly because the other option was someone who promised to be the snuffer of the MC's fire. I despised that man, but also know he was a product of his time.

One of the things I wasn't expecting with this book was how emotionally invested I would get with these many lives. They had so much tragedy happen to them, but they still tried to make the best of their situation and were such a welcoming community. The MC's struggle with keeping her identity in a world that wanted her to get in line was also another great surprise. She had such a powerful personality and was surprisingly progressive with one of her best friends.

There were hilarious moments, heartwarming moments, heartbreaking moments, and that reveal at the end was actually hilarious and so feasible. I also thought it was a timely read (for me) because it made me think about a few things happening in present time. But that's a different topic not making its way into this review.

I highly recommend this book--especially if you want a historical novel written in a unique way, full of heart, great characters, and the softest and most understated romance that sneaks up on both you as the reader and the MC. I definitely see myself reading this again in the future.

___

320. I'll Have What He's Having by Adib Khorram--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'LL HAVE WHAT HE'S HAVING was quite the experience. Coming from Khorram's incredible YA duology, it was definitely an adjustment because of how spicy this book was, aha. But beyond that, I knew I would enjoy this because Khorram's writing is incredible and full of emotion.

I like how neurotic both characters were about relationships and the past pain they felt with old loves, but how they overcame their anxiousness to give their love a shot. This is why I love dual POVs so much, because I NEED to know where both minds are at--especially when we are shown a situation that always needs a little more context and behind the scenes thought processes. I don't like having to guess what a person is thinking in real life, so it's nice not to have to do it in literature, too.

This is the second book in less than two months that I've read with a wine theme and it was so fascinating. I know the wine world is a complex one, but seeing them in fiction was interesting. Especially the processes and difficulty levels of attaining recognition in that world. But with the wine came the interesting factoids about food and its connection to culture, and family and how some things are completely intertwined.

I also liked the side characters and I think I'd be okay with a companion novel from the POV of a different character--especially the one character who is dating someone that the MC is iffy about. Left me curious and side-eyeing that situation.

Overall, this was SPICY, full of heart, and rounded by Khorram's expert navigation of family and culture. Highly recommend.

___

Happy reading!

[elainsgirl]

Hey, never asked such questions before. But I need an opinion about Gwynriel. They say “can’t wait for Gwynriel/Elucien” book

But it doesn’t make any sense. I mean, okay. If Elain/Azriel’s, which makes the most sense to make them MCs, ends up with Elucien (bc we’re looking at this possibility), how could it be Gwynriel’s book?? To make Azriel the MMC again?

I mean we have three books after ACOWAR:

1. ACOSF

2. Elain/Lucien/Azriel

3. Either a novella or Mor’s book

I can understand that Azriel’s story could be not finished like it happened with Nesta’s. Even though making him a MC again is ridiculous. Besides, no offense to Gwyn, but Mor’s story is far more mysterious and fascinating.

Gwyn’s plot line being about “who her father is” is so stupid. Because it is Lucien’s story, just like discovering his inherited powers lol. I wish Gwyn to overcome her SA trauma, but Lucien was also raped. Like the majority of SJM’s characters 💔 Getting out of the library and exploring the world? Well, Elain always wanted to travel, come on

Gwyn has her own journey to make, her growth, and bringing a very traumatized old men (who can’t even decide between Mor and Elain, moving to Elain; but he’ll forget it all for the sake of a woman he forgot about and cared no more than any other female?? Even Eris is more special for him😂) for long life relationship is gonna be beneficial for her?

Thank you for listening for this rant 🙏🏻

Hey anon 🫶

The way some Gwynriels have planned it - A gwynriel book is next then it will be an elucien book last to close out the trilogy. They say this bcs, Acosf focused on Azriel and he was also part of hofas + got his own bonus all signs pointing to his pov being next. Now ofc, the logical conclusion is that Elain will share that book with Azrie but apparently Gwyn popping up in the bonus and appearing a lot in acosf means she will have the next book with Azriel, instead of Elain. Ofc Elucien would be last - despite two bonuses focusing on Elain and Mass saying acosf had hints for Elains book, as it does not make sense to have Luciens pov next since SF placed such little focus on him.

Some eluciens believe an elucien book is next despite that making 0 narrative sense and a gwynriel book last which again, makes no sense bcs Az was given a bonus now meaning his pov is next, not Luciens. SF set Az up to be the next lead, not the lead after Lucien. In acosf, we learn more about Azriel and his current issues/problems that will ofc be explored in the next book otherwise there was no need for Mass to bring it up now. So whichever way you look at it, a gwynriel book being last or an elucien book being last makes 0 logical sense.

You’re right. Mor has a more fascinating story and as she was given a pov in the novella Its clear Mass wants to focus on her, I would not be suprised if the last book is a Mor book. Or if we get her novella after the next book before we get acotar 6. OMG you’re so right! Gwyns story is basically a Lucien story but Luciens more connected to the plot therefore it makes more sense to give him a book then Gwyn. Gwyn has had her main story, she’s found friends whose dynamic Mass has explored, a role in the NC etc. Whilst there is some mystique around her - nothing is that important that we need her story right now, a novella for Gwyn further down the line is so fitting.

Yh, Gwyn deserves better then Az as a Li. I mean…he was literally ready to beg on his knees for another woman. Gwyn deserves someone that wanted her from the start, someone that only wants her and hasn’t had any significant moments with any other woman….Tarquin seems so fitting for her. The summer and ocean imagery around Gwyn matches Tarquin. Both being associated w teal, blue and white. A prince and a nymph. Their love story has so much potential I hope Mass doesn’t pass up.

I’m always down to listen to any rant 🫶

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

[ Insta ]

🦇 When the World Tips Over Book Review 🦇

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

❓ #QOTD What's your favorite book about siblings (if you don't have one, you NEED to pick up a book by Jandy Nelson)? 🦇 Years ago, the Fall kids’ father mysteriously disappeared, cracking the family into pieces. Dizzy sees spirits, Miles hides the truth of himself behind the guise of perfectionism, and Wynton is on the brink of fame or self-destruction. When an enigmatic rainbow-haired girl shows up, she tips the Falls’ world over. She might be an angel. Or a saint. Or an ordinary girl. Somehow, she is vital to each of them. But before anyone can figure out who she is, catastrophe strikes, leaving the Falls more broken than ever. And more desperate to be whole. With road trips, rivalries, family curses, love stories within love stories within love stories, and sorrows and joys passed from generation to generation, this is the intricate, luminous tale of a family’s complicated past and present. And only in telling their stories can they hope to rewrite their futures.

💜 Jandy Nelson has done it again, weaving magic into every word while creating an intricate, profound, heart-claiming story of family and love. Each of the Falls siblings is so well-developed, so vivid that the heart-aching loss for their father cries off the page, their passions bleeding color into every chapter. And yet, you can't fully know Dizzy, Miles, or Wynton without seeing them from their siblings' point of view--proving that sometimes, those we love know us better than we know ourselves. This story is told in a seamless blend of present and past, family histories & different perspectives overlapping. I fell in love with each character perhaps in the way they loved one another--Cassidy most of all, whose storytelling is captivating, enthralling, dizzying all at once. The word choice is flawlessly executed, giving each character a heartbeat, every heartbreak leaving fissures in their wake. It was beyond worth waiting a decade for another Jandy Nelson book; a story that has bled so much color into my world as a reminder of what well-written prose and character development can be when a passionate writer is at the helm. Despite this story's generational trauma, the love and joy found between the characters, the LOVE built between moments of pain, transcends all else. It tips over.

💙 There are a few trigger warnings you should be aware of before diving into this tender tale: abandonment, addiction/alcoholism, car accident, death, grief, homophobia, infidelity, mental illness, physical abuse, rape/sexual assault.

🦇 If you read one book I've recommended this year, let it be this one. Let Dizzy, Miles, Wynton, and their angel into your heart. This is not a YA book; it's a would-be classic that transcends time and genre. Recommended for fans of Rainbow Rowell, Casey McQuiston, and Becky Albertalli.

✨ The Vibes ✨ 🎻 Siblings/Family Secrets 🌈 Multiple POVs / Timelines 🍇 Rivalries 🥧 Magical Realism 🪽 Family Curse 🍇 Queer MMC 🌈 Poetic Prose 🎻 Mental Health Rep

🦇 Major thanks to the author @jandy.nelson and publisher @randomhouse @penguinteen for providing an ARC of this book via Netgalley. 🥰 This does not affect my opinion regarding the book. #WhentheWorldTipsOver

💬 Quotes ❝ Their eternity was only each other. ❞ ❝ Her mother...once told Dizzy that it used to be believed a white truffle was made when lightning hit and entered an ordinary mushroom. That’s how Dizzy thought of Wynton— unlike the rest of the ordinary mushrooms like her, he had lightning inside him. ❞ ❝ Deep garnet color, hints of cherries, roses, has you talking to the moon and the moon talking right back, pairs well with heartbreak, makes you feel so in love you might ask strangers to marry. ❞ ❝ He decided this would have to be the one slow dance in the history of humankind that never ended. No matter if asteroids careened down, wars broke out, earthquakes toppled cities, the two of them would still, in a thousand years, be here by this river, in starlight, under the redwood trees, swaying together, more one than two, because he suddenly somehow knew deep in his heart that this girl was the kingdom, and for once in his stupid screwed-up life, he was the one who had the keys. ❞ ❝ And now she’s saying someone named Felix, who drove with her down to Paradise Springs, had called her Scheherazade, the Persian queen in A Thousand and One Nights who saved her own life by telling stories. She says she plans on keeping you alive in the same way— by telling you her story. You hope that means her story is a long one and she’ll stay by your side forever. ❞ ❝ She also writes in a journal. When I ask her what she’s writing, she says she’s trying to crash into infinity with words. ❞ ❝ I never want her to know that a life is an abandoned unfinished story. ❞ ❝ There’s an invisible artery joining the hearts of mothers and daughters through which pain is transferred from one generation to the next. ❞ ❝ She didn’t know what people were supposed to do with the leftover love that no one wanted anymore. ❞ ❝ A real love story is not falling in love once, but again and again through all sorts of incarnations. Theirs was a real love story. ❞ ❝ He was the guy full of voltage and fury, who blew the lids off jars, who walked into a room and electrocuted all present. ❞ ❝ Who knew one kiss could turn someone into a brand-new person? ❞ ❝ I do believe now that when the world tips over, joy spills out with all the sorrow. But you have to look for it. ❞

[azsazz]

MM Feedback Shared

(for those who wanted me to share the MM feedback, here we are!)

Thank you to everyone who shared feedback with me, really great stuff in here that I've taken notes and and will work to incorporate in the future edits of MM! 💙💙

Anon Feedback 1: MM feedback here☺️ it feel rude to me to like give you feedback because who am I but i sending one in because I love you and want to read a book from you😍 My absolute favourite scenes are the ones in the gallery, it’s so fucking beautiful and a perfect turning point in the story. Another thing that I think someone already mentioned, I think there needs to be like more scene of Azriel with case and Rhys so it can like build his character more and we can connect to him even more than we did! Love you!! Thank you for giving us place for giving you feedback and not like getting mad about it ❤️

Not rude at all! Especially because I asked for feedback! YES, LOVE LOVE LOVE the gallery scene, will def be keeping that around for the book and maybe brushing it up a little. I agree, more friendship things with Rhys and Cass, got it! Thank you for the feedback!! 💙

Anon Feedback 2: Following Midnight Muse feedback First of all I just wanted to say that I loved the series with my whole heart, I probably read every chapter less than five minutes after it’s release and ATE it up every single time. The only thing that felt somewhat off to me was the pacing, especially toward the end of the series. You did such a good job of making them dislike each other that it felt like they got together a bit too quickly and worked out all their issues a little too perfectly. I feel like for the final product I would have reader and Az apologize to each other a little earlier on the grounds of doing better for their friends. Maybe even have someone from the friend group make a bigger deal of the strain this war, about what in the grand scheme of things is not a big deal, is doing to their friendship as a whole. Similar to what Rhys did with Az. After that I would have things like the ride home scene little moments of them trying their best to find a common ground. Have them, begrudgingly, realize that they actually do kind of enjoy each other’s presence. After a tentative peace is managed THEN have them go to the gallery etc etc. You could even put in some healthy arguments, two people who were constantly at each others throats for months won’t suddenly agree on everything immediately just because they like each other, if you would like i personally would’ve liked to have seen them argue and then be like “we need to step away and rehash this calmer”. Also this is a side note, I would’ve liked to have seen Az actually give reader the tattoo. I liked the choice to have it at the end but personally I was waiting for it all series and was a bit sad we didn’t get to read about it but maybe that was just me. Ik once it’s a book you’ll have more time to further flesh out things, and I truly did LOVE reading along. You’re a fantastic writer and I hope this doesn’t come across as overly critical bc that is not my intent. Looking forward to what this project will become ❤️

Good call, I will def work on the pacing. I think I felt a bit rushed and also I was like like how do I write them together when all I know is to write them disliking each other 😅 that was definitely tough for me so i will work on that! Everything you said is such great feedback, thank you so so much for sending me your thoughts! I'm excited to work on it some more and hopefully put out a great piece of work!

Anon Feedback 3: I think if you're looking to publish MM, it needs more of a plot - and I don't mean that in a bad way. I just feel like there weren't really any stakes besides the main characters getting together. You had interesting ideas, like introducing the father as a potential problem, but that didn't really go anywhrre. You could really dig into your MMC overcoming his trauma, however that looks in a published version, and the FMC overcoming her insecurity - which was kind of hinted at but never explored and when it was resolved, I felt like it didn't really...matter much. Like it wasn't relevant as much to the plot? I would encourage you to explore more, dig deeper, figure out a problem or two for them to overcome. As fanfic, I really liked it, for whatever that's worth.

I totally agree with you. I mentioned her imposter syndrome but it was definitely something backseat to their relationship. Will def be fixing that and brining in their family dynamics as well. Thanks!

Anon Feedback 4: ahh it’s my first time sending one of these i’m nervous😬😬(response to this) but OH MY GOD i ADOREDDD midnight muse, i very rarely read series when i read on here but i honestly used to refresh your blog nearly every day looking forward to new chapters your writing is honestly amazing, if you go ahead with this and release it as a book im going to end up with about 10 copies honestly😭😭🤍– it’s very very hard to think of criticisms of this series because of how much i honestly adored it, but if it had to have any id ask for maybe more detail regarding azriel’s family and what exactly happened with his dad buying the apartments, and everyone’s reactions to that. i honestly think you should ofc do what you love with it, judging by the fact you’re making it into a book and also as a reader, i feel like you can really tell that it was something you enjoyed to write and i feel like that made it even more special to read ??? id love to see that come through in the book so please don’t make any changes that you’re not going to enjoy writing🤍🤍and also the whole few parts where he takes her to the art gallery and she sees all of his drawings was just so unbelievably perfect i’d love it if you could keep that the same – overall it was an AMAZING read, if midnight muse has one fan it is me if it has none i am dead, if you turn this into a book i just know it would be so special i hope this was helpful and thank you for being an amazing author !!!🤍🤍🤍

First of all, thank you so so much for the support! It was so much fun and I was with the rest of you, anticipating the next part as if I wasn't the one writing it lol. Yeah, I thought of his dad being a more of a problem later on and it definitely shows, so I will be working on that more during the rewrite process. very excited to explore their personal lives more! This was very helpful, thank you so much for sending me feedback!! 💙

Anon Feedback 5: Hi! I loved Midnight Muse and started reading it when you first posted so my feedback might actually not be amazing for the earlier chapters but I defo agree with the father/az comment on your post and I'm sure your plan is to expand on Cassian/Lucien's personal issues but that would be welcomed as well I think!! Also - and this is a very personal note, but maybe you could make the Az/Reader storyline extend a bit (maybe utilising the father storyline to make it go up and down again) I always love reading about characters' romances after they get together properly as I'm a sucker for an established relationship fic (which is why I like to read fan fictions when books end too soon for my liking😂) Regardless - even if you made zero changes the book would be amazing because I genuinely really loved it!

For sure for az's family relationships, those will be flsuhed out and explored more. For cass and luc I was trying to allude/create anticipation for their own stories because in my ideal world it would be a four book series haha ("az," "rhys," "cass," and then "luc"), but i can definitely work on those more, give them better structure and not keep everything super secret for them! Ugh, i know, i could've written so much more for them too, so obsessed with this. thank you for the feedback, i really appreciate it!

Anon Feedback 6: With the midnight muse feedback personally I found their relationship a bit faked if that makes sense? I feel like he just asked her out and then suddenly it was like they knew eachother forever. Almost like you were rushing their relationship? At points I was like mate you don’t know eachother but other than that it was pretty good and I loved it!

Yeah, this is for sure good feedback to have. their relationship really did do a 180 in the span of a chapter, so i will work on them gradually finding middle ground and then having their feelings come across more natural! Thank you!!

Thank you so much to everyone who sent feedback!! I really appreciate you all so much!! 💙💙

[littlebookishblog]

Master of Salt & Bones by Keri Lake 🦴🎹🖤🔪

Synopsis: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/50702585-master-of-salt-bones

Genres: Dark Romance, Gothic Fiction, Suspense, Erotic Romance, Psychological Thriller, Mystery, Contemporary Romance Tropes: reclusive hero, young heroine, damaged leads, forbidden romance, dark past, family secrets, obsession, flashback, trauma bonding

Warnings: age gap relationship, obsessive/possessive behavior, grooming/power imbalance, violence, sa, child abuse, child death, child sa, domestic violence, self-harm, mental illness, death, murder, suicide, kidnapping/abduction, torture, incest, manipulation, substance abuse, misogyny, animal death, graphic sexual content Dates Read: January 9, 2025 - January 20, 2025 / 552 pgs / Kindle Spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️ Rating: ⭐⭐

Review: Master of Salt & Bones by Keri Lake had been sitting on my TBR list for three years. Having recently enjoyed two of her other books, I was excited when one of my book clubs chose this title for their January 2025 read along. It seemed like the perfect opportunity to finally dive in. Unfortunately, this book did not live up to my expectations.

Isadora, a reclusive young woman, finds herself drawn to the enigmatic and brooding Lucian Blackstone, the heir to a crumbling estate with a dark past. As Isadora becomes entangled in the mysteries surrounding Lucian and his family, she uncovers secrets that challenge her perception of love, loyalty, and her own identity.

The story alternates between the perspectives of the FMC and the MMC, with additional flashback chapters centered on the MMC's past. While some of the flashback scenes were engaging and left me curious about the unfolding mystery, the present-day narrative involving the FMC and MMC felt lackluster and disjointed.

The chemistry between the two protagonists was unconvincing. Their relationship lacked a solid foundation, making the sudden obsession of Lucian for Isadora, a woman half his age, difficult to believe. While both characters have traumatic backgrounds to bond them, their connection felt forced and devoid of genuine tension or chemistry, which detracted from the impact of their encounters.

The author does tie up most plot threads by the end, but several elements remained unresolved, leaving me with a lingering sense of confusion and frustration. Moments that were presumably intended to be climactic or revelatory often had me thinking, "WTF was that?" rather than feeling satisfied or intrigued.

Overall, Master of Salt & Bones was a disappointment. It neither gripped me nor compelled me to turn the pages in anticipation. If you're reading for the spicy scenes rather than a coherent, engaging plot, you might find it worth your time. However, if you're seeking a well-constructed story with meaningful character development, this book is one to skip. I regret the time spent slogging through it when I could have been reading something far more enjoyable.

[libraryofnika]

౨ৎ Recent Arcs I Received ౨ৎ

📍It Will Only Hurt for a Moment (Edelweiss, Adult, Mystery-thriller)

An atmospheric feminist horror novel about a woman trying to reinvent herself at a secluded artists' colony, only to be drawn into its dark past—from the Thriller and Stoker Award-nominated author of The Violence. Releases on October 22, 2024.

📍Bull Moon Rising (Edelweiss, Monster Romance)

In a world of magical artifacts and fantastical beings, a woman determined to save her family joins forces with an unlikely partner, in this steamy romantasy by USA Today bestselling author Ruby Dixon. Releases on Ocotober 15, 2024.

📍Red in Tooth and Claw (Edelweiss, Horror)

MC is disguised as man and is shipped off to a remote social outcasts and finds a mangled body of a settlement boarder. This will be released on October 8, 2024.

📍 So Thirsty (Netgalley, Vampires, Horror, Mystery-thriller)

A woman must learn to take life by the throat after a night out leads to irrevocable changes in this juicy, thrilling novel from the USA Today bestselling author of Such Sharp Teeth and Black Sheep. Releases on September 10, 2024.

📍 Revenge of the Forgotten (Sent by the Author, Fantasy)

MC is transported to a strange world where a dawning rebellion takes place. This will be released on September 13, 2023

📍The Academy of the Dead (Sent by the Author, Gothic, Fantasy Romance)

College setting academic rivals, gothic fantasy. FMC and MMC are necromancer I believed. Both became reluctant allies to recover a lost page of the book of the dead. Releases on October 11, 2024.

📍Rum Sips and Salty Lips (Sent by the Author, Contemporary Romance)

Grumpy x Sunshine small town romance. FMC and MMC had a one nigh stand and turns out that they were neighbours and had to keep everything a secret on their friends as they navigate personal traumas and problems. This will be released on September 20, 2024.

📍 When He Takes (Sent by the Author, Mafia Romance)

Sequel to When He Desires. This is going to be hate to love since the first book ended on having Nero's identity revealed and enemies going to be on their backs. This will be released on August 31, 2024.

📍 Whispers of Deception (Sent by the Author, Dark Romance)

Bodyguard x Mafia Princess? I'm not sure. Marriage of Convenience and probably a revenge and hate to love plot. This will be released on September 17, 2024.

These are all the latest arcs I received. I'm also gonna do a kindle haul soon since I also got a number of new kindle books added on my kindle library 🙈

Bookstagram Booktwt Goodreads

[cocktailsfairytales]

BRISTOL by @AuthorNicoleSulli is coming August 19th!!

Preorder this all-new MC romance, filled with ALL the spice TODAY!

PREORDER HERE:

https://amzn.to/3Q6CBwQ

What to expect:

MC Romance

Captive FMC

Possessive/Protective MMC

Club Drama

*this book has multiple triggers including but not limited to captivity, r*pe, abuse, torture, & m*rder*

BLURB

Sebastian

The broken girl that Mo brought to the clubhouse had me wanting to save her from herself and anyone else that dare hurt her from the moment I saw her. Now it’s my personal mission to find the bastard that did this to her and make him suffer worse than he can possibly imagine. I’m trying to piece this broken soul back together with my own two hands, but can we really withstand the trauma she’s been through or are we doomed before we even begin?

Bristol

Most girls at seventeen are thinking about college, parties, what boy they want to go to prom with. Me? I was thinking of a way to escape my new reality. I was kidnapped before I could make any of those normal seventeen year old girl decisions. Instead of normal, I was held in a concrete room and forced to become a toy for my own personal version of Satan for six long years. Then my new reality took a turn. I was rescued. SAVED. But at what cost?

[acourtofthought]

Miscommunication trope doesn't work when all it would take is for Az to one single real conversation. With Rhys, "I care about her, Rhys." "I'm over Mor, Rhys." With Elain, "are you going to talk to Lucien about your bond?" "What do you want from this Elain?" With Lucien, "We didn't mean for this to happen, but we couldn't help it" "We're sorry for hurting you" and what happened could have been avoided. Az has experienced the emotional safety of the IC for centuries. If after 500+ years he can't drop his guard for a few moments with the female he supposedly loves and his brother who he does love, then a relationship should be the last thing he's worried about. He's clearly got "too much trauma" to be with Elain if he can't be the tiniest bit vulnerable with her or Rhys.

A miscommunication trope doesn't usually happen from the POV of the one doing the rejecting.

A miscommunication trope only works when the MMC doesn't confirm he did the right thing then ends the scene thinking about another woman.

For anyone crying that Gwyn is manipulating him, it's kind of amazing that her "agoraphobia" will prevent her from falling in love and being intimate with a male but it wouldn't stop her from becoming an evil villain, manipulating the romance of Az and Elain. Apparently she can betray everyone from within the library, just not find romance.

[away-ward]

hey ko, i was that prev anon, and thanks for redirecting me to that blog!

and just want to make some comments here about:

"The op in the screenshots seemed to ask for a guy that wasn't a jerk, and PD was like "well, I tried and nobody liked it."

and

"PD seems to struggle with understanding what really makes their MLI seem like jerks."

i honest to god disagree with PD on this because birthday girl solely existed and written for the "nice guy who works hard in life, and deserves good things to happen to him" trope. Like pd literally wrote this for their fans who wanted something differently. And while pike lawson, the mmc, was not the most clean mmc ever, he really was overally just a good and great man.

-

here's some author's note about birthday girl from the recently re-released paperback of birthday girl:

BIRTHDAY GIRL Q AND A

Birthday Girl is different from your usual work. Did you worry that it would disappoint readers?

I think I'm always nervous. Especially when my editor gets ahold of a book! She's brutal.

But honestly, I never feel like I have a choice but to be who I am. I loved the idea, and it felt really good—a nice change of pace to write a kinder hero, someone who works hard for a living and deserves to come home to a person who loves him. I remember a reader saying, "This is the book I didn't know I needed from Penelope Douglas," and that was great to hear, because readers, I think, needed to see that I could write a man like Pike. He has his moments, but he's not a bully. He has no real trauma. He's a good man.

-

and guess what, birthday girl was actually loved by a lot of fans, even if theyre not fans of taboo romances, dark romances or bully romances. The only criticisms this book get was because of is 1. Age gap, 2. Light Misogyny, and 3. If they're just not into smutty taboo indie romances. Literally. So if PD KNOWS how to write mmc like pike and fmc like jordan, wtf do they mean they dont know how to write jerks? Like wh does what they said always dont make sense?

but then they also almost only seem like will grayson is a cute quirky guy acting as if he did not assault rika in corrupt so? Idk. And them being confused when people dont understand why tuernan in credence ended up with kaleb because kaleb was not given enough space in the books at the other two potential love imterest is so? Like why are you surprised? Putting aside all the taboo or problematic aspects of the book, kaleb still was not around tiernan a lot and their development was shite.

i just ugh, wtv haha idkew to think rn, i shouldve jjst read and move on

Ah see, I haven't read any of their other books, but I have heard birthday girl is one of their more well received even if credence is better known. I apologize for talking about what I didn't know.

So it seems they do understand how to write a character that isn't a jerk. But then why did the reader ask for a mmc that isn't a jerk, and why didn't PD just point to birthday girl instead of bringing up nightfall, which they should know their fans are divided on?

PD isn't an author I give a lot of mind to. For the most part, I'm not into what they write, so their reasonings don't often make sense to me. They really took a misstep here by asking for feedback and then immediately rejecting it when someone brought up a topic they didn't want to discuss (Alex). If that's the case, don't bring up the topic (nightfall) first.

Edited paragraph: It would be one thing if they actually wanted to learn and expand their understanding of what the issue is, but I truly don't think they care. They like what they wrote. They're proud of what they wrote. And they have a right to enjoy it. Writing takes so much time and energy, to reach a finished product is an accomplishment. I have no doubt it hurts to present your work to "fans" and then have them riot. Which is why they're wanting to shut down conversations about it; it hurts. But no body is conceding their side, and we shouldn't be expected to.

I don't feel there is a lot here to make sense of, and I don't understand enough PD to even attempt to explain a reason. It's unfortunate, really. Sometimes the best thing to do is just ignore the author and like you said, move on.

[phantomdialogue]

˗ˏˋ. ݁₊ ✶ ˖ 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐲 𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐲 - 𝟔/𝟓 ☆ . ݁ ˖ˎˊ˗

premise: nora stephens is a cutthroat literary agent in new york city whose sister begs her for a girl's trip in the small town of sunshine falls. charlie lastra is an broody editor from the big city who happens to be there at the same time, much to nora's annoyance. as they keep meeting again and again, things change and their stories start to intertwine more than they ever could have expected.

couple: charlie lastra and nora stephens

tropes: could be considered a slight workplace romance, vacation-esque romance as well, small town, rivals to lovers (ish), eldest sibling trauma

review below!

review:

yes. emily henry has done it again. except this time even more so. i LOVED this book. i really loved people we meet on vacation but this... this one took my heart and ran so fast away from that. charlie and nora are everything to me. their story, their love, their dynamic, everything about them is just insane to me in the best way possible. i found myself relating so deeply to both of them that i think that's why i loved this one even more but at it's very core, i think i just love emily henry's style and voice and storytelling.

charlie lastra... what a man. charlie is everything to me. i love him as a mmc. i think he's so complex and even though we never read his pov, i think that the way that emily henry writes him really makes you see the way that he thinks and feels so clearly. he's never a huge mystery without the intention of it. he's very clearly written and you understand him on a really personal level even from nora's pov. nora stephens is just like me in every way that tugs on my heart strings and rips it out. i love her so deeply. i think she just immediately became a character i connected to on a deeper level and she's such an understandable fmc that i feel such a kinship to her.

charlie and nora's romance is so realistic and i think that's a lot of what draws me to it. the ending is so sweet and yet still feels real and possible rather than a super romcom ending. i cried so much through the last few chapters (and the epilogue) because it just felt so right to them and their love and i was so happy. i really adore this book so so much and it's easily top three of the year so far for me now. i can't wait to keep reading the rest of her books as she's quickly becoming an "auto-buy" author for me.

q & a:

are they endgame? - yes. yes. yes. i think they have such an interesting way of communicating with each other that works so well for them in the long run. they know and understand each other so well and i think it will serve them well forever. i can just imagine them growing older together in years to come and their banter becoming cute old people bickering and it makes me so happy.

did i cringe? - not really. i think there are some moments where i'm like "that character's an ass" but nothing that deters from the book at all. there is a certain character that did make me cringe but that's because he's an asshole. it was a purposeful cringe, ya know?

favorite part? - how do i choose? i think adding on to what i said before about charlie and nora's romance being realistic, it's that they are both realistic characters too. they have plenty of reasons that are explained and explored for why they are the way they are. nora specifically is a beautifully thought out character. you read her thoughts and emotions and you don't question where they came from. you know why she thinks that way and i think that says so much about emily henry's understanding of her character. everything is purposeful and the way it is for a reason and it really makes you feel like she is a real living human rather than some trope (which is a funny comparison considering the book's topics).

least favorite part? - it's such a nitpicky thing but i detest the font used to differentiate between email/text and normal writing. it's not the most accessible thing. but writing/plot/character wise, i couldn't choose a least favorite. that's not a cop out it's just the truth.

favorite quotes (some spoilers here, of course, but minimal):

I’m a grown man, Nora. I can buy my own Bigfoot erotica, thank you very much.

Over the years, I’ve developed a finely tuned filter—with pretty much everyone except Libby—but Charlie always manages to disarm it, to press the exact right button to open the gate and let my thoughts charge out like velociraptors.

I’m not ashamed of my upbringing, but the more you tell a person about yourself, the more power you hand over.

It feels like my outline is dissolving, like I’m turning to liquid.

A minute later, Charlie appears and thrusts two velvet throw pillows at us. “Your majesties,” he says, scowl/ pouting before returning to his post.

It feels like there’s poison inside of me. No matter how hard I run, I can’t burn through it.

“You said wait,” he challenges. “Yes, and you apparently heard I’m going to tase you in the crotch.”

“It’s how he realized I wanted to learn how to put things together. I thought the world made sense, and I wanted to find the sense.

“There isn’t for women either. There’s just tall women,” he says, “and the men too insecure to date them.”

I wonder how many times we’ve passed each other in our city of millions.

I don’t feel like Nadine Winters when he’s this close. I feel like I’m sugar under a blowtorch, like he’s caramelizing my blood.

“It’s hard to think in words right now, Nora.”

Even when we’re agreeing with each other, our conversations feel less like we’re taking turns carrying the torch and more like we’re playing table tennis while said table is on fire.

A minute later, he adds, you okay? Like even from separate rooms, with multiple screens between us, he is reading my mood.

I feel haunted by him, and I’m determined to haunt him right back.

“How do you do that?” His brow furrows. “Do what?” “Say the right thing.” The corner of his mouth quirks. “No one thinks that.” “I do.”

“Until you got here,” he rasps, “all this place had ever been was a reminder of the ways I was a disappointment, and now you’re here, and—I don’t know. I feel like I’m okay. So if you’re the ‘wrong kind of woman,’ then I’m the wrong kind of man.”

We really are two opposing magnets, incapable of being in the same room without drawing together.

“You fucking undo me,” he says.

“I already told you, Nora,” he murmurs, his fingers splaying on my stomach, just beneath my shirt. “I’ll go anywhere with you.” Sometimes, even when you start with the last page and you think you know everything, a book finds a way to surprise you.

Thank you, I mouth. His chin dips as he smiles. Anything for you, he mouths. In my chest, something heavy turns over.

“If I had to pick one person to be in my corner, it’d be you. Every time. You take care of shit.”

“You do have me, Nora. I never stood a chance.”

Little by little, Charlie kisses away the ache of these past three weeks.

“I thought about you everywhere,” he says. “There’s nowhere in this town we haven’t done this.”

“For what it’s worth,” he says, “I doubt I will ever like anyone else in the world as much as I like you.”

“I know,” he says. “I can read you like a book.”

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

EVERY WEEK I WILL POST VARIOUS REVIEWS I’VE WRITTEN SO FAR IN 2024. YOU CAN CHECK OUT MY GOODREADS FOR MORE UP-TO-DATE REVIEWS HERE.

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16. Shock Marriage for the Powerful Spaniard by Cathy Williams: ⭐️⭐️⭐️

I was addicted to this cheeseball of a book. I'm trying to read through my large (and thrifted) Harlequin book collection, and this was the first one of the year. I'm happy it was because even though it had the typical cheesiness, stilted dialogue, thesaurus raiding, and the confusing use of an Italian term of endearment spoken by a supposed Spanish man, it wasn't a slow book in the least. It was quick, addicting, and had a couple of spicy scenes.

I do have to side-eye the cover creator because the FMC was supposed to have a "latte" coloured complexion (which I hated, but also made her not white. Love that whitewashing of a cover.

Read this for entertainment purposes, not for much else. Although, I AM a sucker for this trope.

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17. We Could Be So Good by Cat Sebastian: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I am grateful to the person who put this book on my radar (thank you m/m reddit group). This book was beautiful and full of admittedly high stressful moments, made a little bit worse by my anxiety that this was going to end like so many books that were written during the decades that this book is set in. Actually, I love that one of the MCs comments on this because it's always been one of my pet peeves when it comes to classic Queer books.

I loved the dynamics between these two characters and how they worked off each other. They were amazing together and even though they weren't perfect, I loved their vulnerability and related to their anxiety (I have a bad habit of empathizing too much with characters when I'm reading from their perspectives). Their love felt like such a naturally progressive thing and whenever they described how they saw each other, my heart did a little dance for them. Although the story spans just a bit over a year (maybe more?) it felt like these two were friends for years.

I also adored the side characters and the found family they offered to the characters. During a time where trust was a gift, these two were gifted with the very best. If they were real people, I only wish that they got to live the best rest of their lives together possible.

In a way, I wanted to cry at the end of this book. The journey, their love, their growth, and the fact that this was reflective of how so many Queer people might have lived during those decades (and some still live this way). It's so heartbreaking knowing people can't just...exist and love who they want. It's mind-blowing.

Anyway, this was sweet, angsty, sexy, and touching. I loved it so much.

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18. Lotus by Jennifer Hartmann: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Mega-TWs for this book--the author includes them at the beginning of the book. Including CSA.

Jennifer Hartmann has quickly become one of my favourite authors. This is only my second book by her, but it was so exceptional that now I MUST have every single one of her books. STILL BEATING had me in such a chokehold that I didn't think it was possible to have the same addicted experience to another book by her, but I was WRONG.

LOTUS was a dark, romantic, and trauma laced read. Everyone had their own past trauma to confront and I think that's a realistic take because most of us have something we're struggling with in our adult lives. The way Hartmann tackles trauma and somehow still finds the beauty in the dark and in what scares us is truly masterful. She offers possibilities to people who have lost hope of any sort of future. It was tear-inducing, but also such an experience.

The MMC was so well-written and I love that Hartmann was consistent in his persona throughout the whole book. He was so endearing and I just wanted to protect him from the world. Side note: every time I thought of him, I saw the actor who plays Reacher in the show of the same name. Iykyk. The way he cared for the FMC was so pure and like she mentions early in the book, he hasn't been tainted or jaded by humanity. He was a beautiful human being.

The FMC was the epitome of "smile and fake it till you make it". She was quirky and fun, but also carried some heavy reminders of how fragile life is. Though I got frustrated with her a few times, I also completely understood why she was the way she was.

The way everything came together at the end had me yelling "I KNEW IT!", because apparently I'm a book detective, was amazing. Even though the twist is heartbreaking and had me crying a bit, it was so powerful and had everything come together so perfectly.

Hartmann gave every character introduced a life and a heart--and she made them all vulnerable and showed how strong those characters were for their imperfections.

I loved, loved, loved this book.

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19. Eragon by Christopher Paolini: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read January 2024

I read this about 16 years ago, so it felt like I was reading it for the first time. I listened to the audiobook, which I love to do when I'm re-reading, and let me just prepare you: the voice actor is no bueno at magical voices LOL.

Anyway, the story itself was fun and I like to think it stood the test of time. It was fun, full of adventure, and being older, I can tell this story was written by a younger author. This is in no way a bad thing--in fact, I think it made it more believable for me that this MC is only 15-16. The writing felt more like the author was going on his own adventure and he really loved reading fantasy books. It was just pure fun. Although at times, I seriously was impressed with his mastery over the English language with his writing.

Overall, this was a fun re-experience. Some points were a little on the slower side, but I can also see that this is building that foundation for an epic series. Will definitely be re-reading the sequel!

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20. Murder in the Family by Cara Hunter: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I was worried about the hype surrounding this book because hype and I aren't always the best of friends. But listen, I started the audiobook one night and finished the book the following day. THIS WAS SO ADDICTING and brilliant.

I highly recommend doing the audiobook--it's a full cast and minus the music (there wasn't any), this felt like a podcast and I adore those kinds of stories.

I'm impressed with how Hunter was able to create such strong personalities with other an initial description of what each specialist does for a living and their dialogue (especially since the story is told in the style of a script and other multimedia add ons, like photos and maps and clues.) But I think hearing the voice actors give life to these characters also helped a lot.

The twists had my eyebrows rising and my smile of surprise growing after every episode. And when all was revealed, that last punch of a surprise had me wishing I could yell at someone about it. Fantastic.

Normally, thrillers and I are very hit or miss--this was 100% a hit with me. So much freaking fun.

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21. Set the Record Straight by Hannah Bonam-Young: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

One of my favourite things in romance novels is something that I know a lot of people don't like: little to no conflict. Maybe it's because it's a novella, but this one was such a breath of fresh air. Communication? No misunderstandings? Respect for your partner? No bullshitting around the truth? Sign me right up.

My biggest regret is reading this in January rather than during the holidays!

I loved the two MCs' friendship and how it was the perfect foundation for their relationship. That being said, I did think it all happened super quick and while I know this is because this is a novella, but I wouldn't have minded if this was a bit of a longer book--just so we could dive a bit more into their past and their relationships with the people around them.

This was also SPICY. I listened to the audiobook and the I would pause what I was doing just to stand there and listen with hot cheeks. This was hot HOT. If you like that in romance novels, yeah, this is for you. It was super caliente and I was very here for it.

I highly recommend, not just for the spice, but because this relationship is so pure and it was just a bite of happiness between two friends who should have been more all along but finally found their way to each other. Also, there may be some relatable moments in here and I just--yeah.

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22. The Measure by Nikki Erlick: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I think THE MEASURE is a great metaphor for how the world treats people it considers "other" and just how interlaced we all truly are at the end of the day.

While the story itself is about the strings and the lengths they offer the individual, at the core of this story is a message about how we view life and how others view our own lives. It's that continuous question of: if my life is mine, why does it bother you what I do with it? And then using the small few to crucify the rest with inane laws and prejudices. Many of the events in this book could easily mirror what is continuously happening in our societies.

We get to see the story of THE MEASURE play out through various characters and as their lives come together and separate, I was constantly in awe of how it was all happening. I wanted certain answers and knew I had to be happy with whatever I was offered because like the characters, I only had the strings and the theories to go off.

I won't lie, this made me cry a few times. I felt anger and heartache, joy at the power of humanity and love, and awe at the smallness of the world.

While I loved this book, I wouldn't say it was a favourite of the year, but it was definitely memorable and I'd definitely recommend it. The last author to make me feel like this about books that explore this kind of message was Karen Thompson Walker.

I highly recommend THE MEASURE if you're looking for a book that will challenge you to look at your life and ask yourself: would you open the box, or keep it closed and just live your life unaware?

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23. Lovelight Farms by B.K. Borison: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'm definitely reading this series out of order, but who's keeping track, right?

I liked LOVELIGHT FARMS more than its sequel. This one was told only from the POV of the FMC, but something about this one captured my interest more. Maybe it was the angsty friendship, or the fact that everyone was saying "IT'S HAPPENING!", which was adorable.

I think I also liked the dynamic between these two characters a lot more than the characters in the second book. I think they worked a lot better than a one night (one weekend?) stand that somehow couldn't stop thinking about each other. These two characters had a history to work off and it was nice to see that evolve.

The farm was also like a character itself and I loved seeing it from this perspective--the one of a person who truly loves and breathes the space.

What I didn't like so much was the stupid miscommunication that happened near the end because of the FMC's assumptions, fears, and anxieties. I get it, love is scary af, but you know what's scarier? Miscommunications.

Other than that blip, I really enjoyed this one and I can see how anyone who reads this is easily pulled into this fun and quirky contemporary world!

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Have you read any of these books? Would you recommend them?

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Happy reading!