#trans kids deserve to get to adulthood

[punkpandapatrixk]

Full Snow Moon in Leo ♦︎ Moon Magick Pick A Card

Full Snow Moon was in Leo on 12 February🦁This is one of the last FMs before March’s Spring Equinox, our true aenergetic new year. With this Sun/Leo/5H aenergy and the Snow Moon’s theme revolving around ‘introspection’, as part of your New Year’s Resolution or something, if you must make a clear intent, intend the year to be one of Abundance and Prosperity specifically through FUN AND PLAY!!🤩💫🎉

That’s just how it is with Leo/5H aenergy, babe. Fun in the Sun~🌞🐈All things considered, wouldn’t you agree that Humanity deserves a LYFE of FUN AND PLAY whilst remaining considerate and thoughtful? Fuck 'psychopathy-based capitalism' and bring in the era of Solarpunk!🌤Abundance for all, sensibly and in harmony with the Planet, something like that? Yeah, that should be possible provided enough of us DEMAND that Reality🥰🌬🌊

Anyway, this Leo FM, whichever House the Moon falls in your natal chart, just know that she’s inviting you to reconnect with your Inner Child🪺The pure-hearted child who—probably—saw itself with much higher Integrity before the hustle of adolescence robbed it of its Innocence🌼

So many of us—and this isn’t just a Gen MZ thing either—have unknowingly sustained so much discipline trauma caused by sociopathic authority figures who abused their power to subjugate us—whether through the ‘family system’ or education system; religious system or economic system; and whatever other kinds of System existing in Society🚂

‘They never pay the slaves enough so they can get free, just enough so they can stay alive and come back to work.’ – Charles Bukowski

One way or another, every one of us was forced to devote ourselves to things and tasks that essentially didn’t matter in the grand scheme of our Highest Intended Destiny. It’s caused so much fear and chaos bubbling deep in the psyche🫕This Full Snow Moon in Leo, use this aenergy to further release those chains and shackles of trauma and fear—and even a sense of unworthiness—so that by Spring Equinox, you’re ready as heck to embrace or embark(!) on a new chapter of Life of Liberty~🎮🗽🎇

It all starts in the mind, baby. What's your agreement? In this new paradigm, if you ain’t gon be walkin' at your own pace and makin' your own rules—sensibly and responsibly (Leo themes)—what even is the point of having survived your Life thus far~?🏍

in the feels: Child by NCT MARK

docu: The Enslavement of the Middle Class on Jake Tran

deck-bottom: Ace of Swords Rx, Red Geographer (Marco Polo) & Priestess of Integrity

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – Illuminate the World with Your Passion

c h i l d – Ace of Pentacles

Do you remember the small activities you enjoyed as a kid?🎲The grownups might’ve called them your ‘hobbies’, but to you they simply felt like things and endeavours that were ‘natural’ for you to engage in. Natural inclinations would fit the bill better. Some of these activities held a puzzle piece of what you’re meant to do well into adulthood🧩

The child in you was inherently attracted to them because subconsciously you were training yourself in the Art of just that very engagement⛳️For instance, say that you were unusually ‘passionate’ about jigsaw puzzle as a kid, this in itself could be your ‘hint’ at how when you’d become a grownup, that mind that loves to solve problems and figure out the bigger picture would be utilised to solve puzzles and mysteries that exist in the world🎯

So just like that, even an unusual pull towards playing jigsaw puzzles could hold a glimmering inkling that you’re meant to be a detective or a criminologist or a psychologist, or whatever resonates, really🏸OK, so this is just one example of a scenario—bottom line is: remember some activities that you used to be so unusually drawn to doing and get refamiliarized with them NOW~🌞

p l a y – 7 of Wands Rx

Why? Because the ignited passion—or reignited if you’d forgotten them for a while—could open up a path of understanding deep within your psyche, what would lead you to figuring out what you’re meant to do in this next chapter of your Life~!🔥Leo is the ruler of the 5H, there lies our hobbies and innate, even special, interests what would LINK us with others of similar views and values☃️❄️⛄️

Those other people with similar tastes and possibly even goals, can be understood by your 11H—House of Aquarius; House of our Communities. Here with the 7 of Wands in reverse, you’re being invited to redefine what ‘networking’ means for you on a deeply spiritual fashion. Who are your people, babe? Actually, what kind of person do you even want to be perceived as?🍂

You VIBE attracts your TRIBE, remember? And most importantly, with all of these natural inclinations that you are surely very apt at, what do you want to do with them and who do you want to inspire?🌻What typa collective can you uplift with your warm sunshine? Hmm, people who live passionately are indeed warm🥰

i n n o c e n c e – 2 of Cups

As you maintain your vibrations high and feel safe in your daily activities that are, hopefully, aligned with your 5H inclinations, you’ll be met with miraculous situations where the Universe puts people and events in your path what would only enhance your experience in those 5H pursuits that you resonate with🥁

In essence, with this Full Snow Moon in Leo, I’m seeing that you’ll feel much less burdened by the duties of Life that in the grand scheme of everything don’t feel that big for your Soul🪕You get that? I don’t see you becoming irresponsible, not at all; I’m only seeing you more able to prioritise what’s truly, truly essential to do at a given time🎲

And so, with that renewed mindset, or attitude, so to speak, you become less and less hard on yourself and even less do you give a fuck about what others think about the stage/phase of your Life’s development right now💖It’s very liberating, but even more importantly, you’ll see just how fast you manifest everything that’s essential to you right now by just being… lighthearted and easy-going💝

full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘

Red Astrologer (William Lilly) & Priestess of Illumination

Access bonus, cards + affs on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – Sparkles of Courage in a Terrified World

c h i l d – Knight of Cups Rx

Wow, the appearance of the Knight of Cups in reverse here is very unique for you, Pile 2. Rather than this being you, I feel more strongly that this card is depicting your understanding of how the people around you, or the world in general, tend to be such timid creatures🐇It’s like, from quite a young age you were already deeply aware, if not disturbed, by the fact that most people were never brave enough to follow their own passions. They’re afraid of listening to their own hearts; and it has always been such a bummer for you to realise that all by yourself🐋

Generally speaking, it’s because you’re one of those very brave individuals who’d always put yourself first before anybody else’s opinions or demands. It’s because you’re quite ‘spiritual’ in the sense that you truly believe in what or where your Heart tells you to go~🐾

Funny thing is, there is simply so much medicine in this courage, reserved for only those who are also finding ways to listen more to their Hearts. But for others who’ve devoted themselves to being sheeples? You appear kinda reckless and they’re gonna have a field trip gossiping about you when you make just one tiny mistake… but so what?🌚

p l a y – Knight of Wands

All the geniuses in the world take pleasure in self-experimentation. When it comes to experiments, my gosh, errors mistakes and failures are bound to happen. It’s normal for you but not for stupid, unimaginative, unoriginal, non-innovative bitches. So you don’t have to listen to their dismissal. Keep being you and keep shining your Light—more like, keep warming the world with the Fire in your Heart. We all know the world right now could do with more of that❤️‍🔥

I dunno why your aenergy keeps making me think of Jennie Kim hahah But anyway, this FM in Leo wants to remind you that a person such as yourself, simply with the amount of passion that you possess, can be a significant healing presence in the lives of others. If you just focus on this aspect of yourself, you’ll soar higher faster because you’re making that conscious choice of thinking very highly of yourself🎀

It’s surely not narcissism; it’s self-love, self-respect, coz you’re obviously not stupid enough to not be able to see your effects on people🪬This year, embrace this of yourself more and more and before long… wow, I don’t even know what’s in store for you this year, but something BIG is literally just around the corner and you're attracting it fast by your positive outlook!⏳

i n n o c e n c e – 9 of Wands Rx

No more being hard on yourself just for people-pleasing this year! ‘I ain’t making myself smaller so it’s easy for you to digest me anymore. Y’all can choke,’ is your MANTRA this year—more than any other years you’ve lived thus far lmao The essence of your innocence this year is that you’re carrying yourself back to calm waters. No more wars—not the ones INSIDE of your head. You got that?🌊

If you’re gonna go to war this time around, it’s a war with the sick world where you’re EJECTING yourself from either the rat race or the brainwash of smallness. You were born big, meant to be big, and even bigger still you’re gonna prove yourself to be. You have all the power in you to inspire the world around you. But first, reconnect with the joy of being alive💐

I think it’s joie de vivre in French? ‘Exuberant enjoyment of Life’. That sounds like something you’d find in any Ghibli movie hahah Enjoy something creative. Eat what you want when you want and sleep as much or as little as it is sensible to you. You’re learning to live again, but more importantly, you’re learning to really show up AS YOURSELF, unapologetically🍍

full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘

Green Historian (Herodotus) & Priestess of Inspiration

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Pile 3 – Lighten Up, You’re Only One You

c h i l d – King of Swords Rx

Do you often feel like you’re responsible for other people’s wellbeing? You could’ve felt this way since you were a kid, yeah? For some, it could’ve been that you grew up in a toxic environment where you were constantly put on the spotlight or you were made to feel like you were always the one with everything to prove. Either way, this caused you to develop a rather frantic way of dealing with duties and a sense of responsibility🤨

It could’ve felt like the burden of the whole world was on your shoulders. If you don’t take charge of a situation well enough, you fear that someone’s responses or reactions could be calamitous. In a sense, you couldn’t help but develop a ‘hero complex’ or ‘saviour complex’ in which most of the time you were just trying to save yourself from other people’s wrath😖

Babe, I’m just saying, this ain’t healthy. But of course you know that. And if you’re reading this and this is your main pile, I’d like to validate your experiences and confirm to you that you’re well on your way out of this sad programming. Baby, baby, the world is healing and so are you~💋🧠⛑

p l a y – 3 of Pentacles Rx

We’ve entered a new paradigm, right? In this new wave of consciousness, we’re no longer tolerating situations and environments where we are made to feel inadequate or hard to love. I see that you’re further separating yourself from that old wave of consciousness. If you’ve actually made the decision to ‘leave that old world’ a long time ago, I see that recently you could’ve just been dealing with some remnants of a heartbreak🪡

All things considered, your Spirit Guides are convincing you that you’re already in safe waters. But more importantly than that, the ‘waters’ in your brains—the chemicals—are returning to balance! Are you feeling this or not, babe?🤩

In a strange way of saying it, I see that you’re gradually taking back your sanity. There’s this feeling like, ‘Where have I been the last xx months/years?’ Or you could simply feel like the peace and calm and the certainty that you’re feeling now is exactly the natural state of being you 'should’ve been able' to access from a long time ago. It’s that kind of a feeling~😑

i n n o c e n c e – 4 of Wands Rx

But of course, it isn’t to say that your hardships up until now didn’t serve a purpose, right? I know all of us are sick of being told this kind of thing lmao But it’s so true for reasons that may be too convoluted. But since the Priestess of Protection is accompanying you here, I’d like to say that your hardships were not at all ‘part of your karma’ in the sense of you having done something bad in a different lifetime😷

If this has been your main message, I hope you know that without a doubt you are a Lightworker of sort. You have this ‘supernatural ability’ to transmute some negative karma in this world. I think that’s exactly why you chose to be born in tough situations and upbringing, all so that you could exercise your Lightwork on those types of situations. The ripple effect will be felt by all inhabiting Planet Earth, you know😊

That said, this FM in Leo would love to just say that the hard part of your Lightworker training is over. All that needed doing and seeing is seen and done. You’re no longer responsible for other people’s lack of common sense nor are you to blame when somebody else is lacking empathy when viewing a situation🧳All of the understanding and compassion you’ve ever poured into the 'wrong people'… all of that you give to yourself now. Be happy, child. You were only a child~😜

full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘

Red Magus (Edward Kelly) & Priestess of Protection

Access bonus, cards + affs on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

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[vixxdaemon]

Hi! I really liked your Termina oc and so I was wondering if you could share some information about him

Hehe, for sure !

Beforehand, as a disclaimer, SheepMasks are a fanmade cultist group I have made up for Sol’s backstory. They’re like the WolfMasks and BunnyMasks but the Alll-Mer worshipping equivalent.

They are actually the most structured animal masked cult amongst all of them, because they have a hierarchy and members have roles they have to fill in. Said roles are separated by genders. They look down upon other animal mask cults because they consider them «primitive» and «violent» (spoilers alert they’re not any better). SheepMasks are spread out around the world as little groups, akin to herds of sheep. A herd is led by a Ram, which has to be an adult man, and the Ram leads Ewes, which are all women (very binary language here when I talk about gendered roles for the sake of convenience). Baby boys are sent to become Rams and make their own herds when they turn 16, and baby girls are destined to remain in the herd they were born in to become priestesses/nuns and serve the Ram.

SheepMasks worship Alll-Mer, the Ascended One. Ewes are supposed to help the Ram preach the word of the Lord. SheepMasks organize sacrifices for one of their member which they consider the purest amongst newborn kids they get, which is called a Lamb. The Lamb is chosen as a child and will be sacrificed when they reach adulthood, as a way to offer «another servant to the Lord and Ascended One Alll-Mer».

Here is what the standard SheepMask outfit looks like (the character here is Sol when he was younger, please refer to him as he/him, as he is a trans man) :

Now onto Sol’s backstory (TW : child abuse, religious abuse, overrall violence)

Sol Doukas, born Selene Doukas, was born a bastard to a WolfMask father and a SheepMask mother in basically the equivalent of Greece in Fear and Hunger’s universe.

He was supposed to be killed at birth, because his wolf half «soiled the pure and holy lamb heritage with the blood of a beast» he had, but the Ram of his herd, in an evangelical fashion, decided to keep him alive because he figured the child would be grateful to not be killed for his forbidden existence.

Sol grew up as a pariah in the herd. He never knew his mother, as no children in herds do, and even less knew of his father (and his father probably does not know himself that he had a kid). He was shamed and berated for being a bastard, a hybrid, a crossbreed. Because his blood was considered impure, he was never chosen to be a Lamb, for the better and for the worst.

Sol was forced to worship Alll-Mer since he knew how to understand what was said to him. This made him resent the worship, and later on have deep distrust for his worshippers.

Sol grew up to be a bitter and angry young adult, often lashing out and acting up, and being constantly reminded how ungrateful he is for being still alive still to this day.

When he was nearing 18 years old, he decided to take matters into his own hands and flee the herd. He carefully prepared everything, managed to get himself a weapon and hide it where no one but him could find it, and was resolved that if he died in the process of leaving, at least he wouldn’t have died rotting in a cult that hates his existence.

Sol almost managed to flee, until the Ram caught him and confronted him, shoving more berating into his mind, up until things got physical and the young «Ewe» took out his pocket knife and stabbed the Ram with it when he got distracted. Sol afterwards cut off his head and disposed of it to make sure he was dead.

On the run, Sol tried to make himself money the best ways he could. He found out he had talents in killing other people, and so he started to become a bounty hunter. He would profit off of people who wanted revenge over people who wronged them before. He found it justified because it was people he deemed deserved what they got.

In the process, he gets interested in Gro-Goroth, his WolfMask heritage affecting his affinity to the God of Destruction. He starts to worship this God and manages to even secretly learn spells made by his magic.

At 26 years old, Sol gets an unusual bounty. Reila Haas, Bremen citizen that used to be held by the Bremen Empire’s government for treason, but was freed by the NLU, an organization that she was allegedly affiliated with. Reila is a terrorist, Sol is told. And the price of this bounty is so high it could possibly make Sol prosper for the rest of his life.

Sol gets on the first train that would get him to where Reila is located, which is Prehevil, a secluded city, lost amongst the country of Bohemia, formerly at war with the Bremen Empire.

When he arrives there however, he is dragged into the festival of Termina, where he is told that he should kill 14 other contestants if he wants to get out of it alive.

[secret-diary-of-an-fa]

I Saw the TV Glow Review (Weirdly, It Works Better Without Subtext)

SPOILER ALERT

ALSO TRIGGER WARNING: Gender Dysphoria, Depression, 90s Television, Kid’s Parties, Rishi Sunak, Skittles (and the repackaging thereof), Unaliving Oneself onstage with a Prop, Ontological Dread and Birds Flying Into Windows.

So, there’s a bit of a buzz about I Saw the TV Glow in cult cinephile circles, and I’m a bit glad about that because it’s a genuinely interesting film and we don’t see genuinely interesting films get the attention they deserve very often. Note, however, that I said “attention” not “praise”. That’ll be important later. So… why is everyone talking about this film (and by ‘everyone’, I mean ‘like, maybe, me and eight other snooty movie weirdos’)? Well, we’ll get there, but first let me lay out the plot for you: protagonist Owen is a socially-awkward, doesn’t-fit-in-anywhere boy right out of the mumblecore ‘90s Indie Cinema Playbook and, during his middle-school years, he befriends a lass called Maddy (though ‘befriends’ might be wrong word for the weird codependence they strike up) and she introduces him to a show called The Pink Opaque: a dark, disturbing, supernaturally-inflected TV show about two psychic friends who fight ‘Mr. Melancholy’ (a sinister occult psychopath with a moon for a face- just go with it). Ostensibly, The Pink Opaque is meant to be for kids, but from the beginning, there’s something very obviously not quite right about it. Weirder still, when Maddy disappears in a doomed bid to find herself, the show gets cancelled, almost as if it was a part of her. Fast-forward, via a few narrative leaps and bounds, to Owen’s adulthood and Maddy reappears, claiming to have been inside the show, which is actually reality. She and Owen, she asserts, are the main characters from the programme and Mr. Melancholy has sent their minds to the ‘Midnight Realm’ of their present, false reality. In order to escape, they need to bury themselves alive, because that’s what’s happening to their real bodies and it’ll reestablish the connection (I’m adding the technobabble, by the way: the phrasing in the movie is nowhere near that logical or concise). Spoiler alert: Maddy does this and then vanishes from the plot, Owen doesn’t and we see him grow old, trapped in his own personal suburban nightmare… right up until the end of the film, where we see him leaving his place of work in a manner very open to interpretation. Is he finally about to wise up and go bury himself in order to emerge renewed, or is he just going home for a cuppa, a biscuit and a long overdue review of his mental health medication?

Now, clearly, all that sounds like a real fucking trip of a movie, but that’s not why it’s generating buzz. See, Maddy believes that she and Owen are the two main characters from The Pink Opaque, but both of those characters are female. Owen, as you can tell from the fact he’s called Owen, is not. Thus, the flick has been interpreted as a metaphor for gender dysphoria and the process of transitioning/ the decision not to. There’s a lot of allusions to Owen feeling like there’s something wrong with him (on one level reality) and feeling like he’s being buried alive and is dying while, er, that’s literally what’s happening to his meta-self on the Pink Opaque level of reality. There’s a bit where he has a break-down at a kid’s party and screams “HELP ME! I’M LITERALLY DYING RIGHT NOW!” Although, in fairness, kids’ parties make me feel like that too and I’m not even remotely trans. The point is, it’s a film with a big, fat, capital-I Issue at its centre, which has given people a license to enjoy it despite the fact it’s weird, schlocky, neon-doused pulp of the highest order. And, fair play to people suffering with gender dysphoria, if this film really speaks to you, you go right the fuck ahead and enjoy it on that level. But (and here I’m about to piss off the entire internet), I actually think it works a lot better if you just take it completely fucking literally. Like, forget the metaphorical nonsense and focus on the actual plot and it instantly becomes one of the best and most upsetting horror films of the last five years. Try and draw real-life parallels, however, and it starts to seem a bit overwrought and melodramatic.

Right. Time to try and explain what I mean without upsetting anyone more than I already have (please don’t send me hate-mail: I don’t read it and you’ll just give yourself carpal tunnel syndrome, which, trust me, is a bitch). It’s pretty obvious that there’s something wrong with the world Owen and Maddy inhabit from the get-go. The school they go to as sprogs is called Void High School, which (aside from having the initials VHS) is also just NOT A REAL NAME FOR A PLACE, and it has really creepy, weird text on its message boards in place of the usual papers and kids drawings (one strip that caught my eye, rendered in stark black-on-yellow font, simply reads ‘PAIN IS WEAKNESS LEAVING THE BODY’). There’s a supermarket that just seems like a giant, sprawling liminal space devoid of people. Characters from The Pink Opaque show-within-a-film get referenced in places that have nothing to do with the show. Daytime, though it never vanishes altogether, seems to become less and less frequent as though the characters are sinking into the deepening night of impending death. Characters who should be key to the protagonists formative years have no dialogue at all, as though they’re just set dressing in a shared delusion. The lore of The Pink Opaque shifts, so that the characters memories cease to align with the show itself, just (it seems) to fuck with them. And, creepiest of all, Owen has to continually narrate his own life straight to camera, like he might forget who and what he is and come unmoored from reality if he doesn’t constantly tell the story. As the clues stack up and the evidence becomes more and more incontrovertible, the realisation slowly dawns: this is not madness. This is not too mixed-up kids bonding over a crappy horror show on TV. This is the story of a person condemned to a slow, humiliating false life by a vengeful cosmic entity while their real body dies in a freshly-dug grave on another level of reality. In that context, the existence of the show The Pink Opaque, is their oxygen-deprived brain trying to warn them to get up! GET UP NOW! YOU ARE DYING! GET UP! And that’s genuinely terrifying. “What if reality isn’t reality?” is already one of the most disturbing questions you can ask yourself. Add to that the questions of “Who is perpetrating reality against you?”, “Why are they doing?” and “What if the real me is dying while this happens?” and you’ve got some pure, solipsistic, philosophical nightmare fuel to keep you up at night!

The gender dysphoria interpretation, in contrast, is probably the intended interpretation, but if you focus too much on that, it makes the whole thing feel a bit, well… silly. Don’t get me wrong. I’m sure gender dysphoria is very, very unpleasant. I’m sure being trapped in the wrong body and not knowing how to express the all-pervading feeling of wrongness is one of the most traumatic things a human being can go through. However, none of the trans people I know in real life have ever collapsed onto the floor in their place of work to scream “I’M LITERALLY DYING RIGHT NOW!” (although my sort-of-adopted trans daughter did once call me after a night of heavy drinking to claim “I’m sober now! I’m just putting these skittles back in their packet!” like it was the dexterity-challenge of the century and somehow proved something. That has nothing to do with this review, I just thought it was funny and that you’d like to know it happened). Nor, to the best of my knowledge, has burying oneself alive and popping back up out of the dirt like a jack-in-the-box ever been considered a useful, therapeutic part of the gender reassignment process. Meanwhile, Owen’s life isn’t just a bit constricting and mediocre, it’s downright oppressive, devoid of even the most fleeting moments of joy, and his only meaningful emotional connection is with someone who fucks off for a decade at a time and reappears claiming to have been living inside a TV show. Nobody could be that miserable all the time, even if they tried. Think about how long human beings live: the number of years and the number of days in each year and the number of hours in each day and the number of minutes in each hour. At the very least, at some point in all that, you’d accidentally catch a Monty Python rerun or see a bird fly into a window and then try and strut off like nothing happened and then… Whoops! You’re laughing like a fucking idiot and your perfect record of being resolutely unhappy is completely fucking ruined, you loser. My point is that, as a metaphor, I Saw the TV Glow feels a little hammy: like an actor beating his chest and wailing to express grief, possibly before committing fake-sepuku with a very obviously cardboard knife. But if you forget it’s a metaphor and remember that Owen’s life is so unremittingly miserable because it was created to be unremittingly miserable by a cosmic entity of terrifying malevolence and power, suddenly it all makes sense… and scares you badly enough to keep you up all night worrying that maybe we’re all trapped by Mr. Melancholy… or Prime Minister Rishi Sunak as we call him here in the dystopian wasteland that used to be Great Britain.

Anyway, I recommend I Saw the TV Glow. It’s stylish, weird, quite clever (though not as clever as it clearly thinks it is) and, frankly, some of the visuals have to be seen to be believed (the monster of the week made of melting ice-cream, for example, is the kind of thing that you’d normally have to neck quite a lot of absinth to see, but the film-makers have brought it to life here so that you don’t have to and, consequently, your liver won’t start to hate you like an abused spouse).

[cordycepsfem]

Pageboy Readthrough, Part Sixteen

I'm in the holiday spirit today - or do I really just want to avoid cleaning my apartment? Either way, your benefit and my loss, since I've decided it's time for some more Pageboy. I am hoping that despite how the book seems to be never-ending, we someday will find its end.

Let us charge bravely into that dark night.

If you've missed other parts of the readthrough, you can find them here.

Previously

EP straight out asks people if they think she is trans

this seems to me like a very loaded question

especially if the person asking has an answer already in mind

I rolled my eyes very hard at this paragraph:

(you were, you will, and you literally told people at a speaking engagement in Boston that being trans is "the only thing you have going" besides your juggling skills, so... I call foul)

EP's description of using her ex-wife is gross

EP dates women, rhapsodizes about Kate Mara, and teaches us how to survive an earthquake (and no, I am not kidding about the last one)

I remind everyone to never ever let a partner choke them

Now

Chapter Twenty-Five

At age thirteen EP decides she only wants to live with her mom, not her father and her horrid stepmother

EP's dad takes them for a drive that - I'm sure you'll be crazy to know - winds them through several Canadian landmarks! including "The Dingle"

do I really wanna explain that? no, because it's funnier if I don't

(it is a granite tower)

EP mentions Moon Mist ice cream, which is a flavor that's only from Nova Scotia

I recommend it, at least once

Dad guilts EP into living with both him and mom

Dad is an asshole

my own, incredibly better father is still on offer, EP

when they talk in adulthood she tells him directly that Linda was the problem

Dad tries to tell her it wasn't Linda, that Linda loves her

Dad clearly has his badge in gaslighting

EP and Dad have not spoken in 5+ years

EP concludes with these dramatics:

Are people denying your very existence or do they not agree with the statements you make about gender, EP? I haven't seen anyone declare that you don't exist, or that trans people don't exist. We can all see them, they're all here.

Is it an onslaught of cruelty and violence or do you just not like the way people speak and respond to trans people? Here in the US we know that approximately 35+ish people with ties to gender are murdered each year, which the HRC laughably calls a "genocide," despite the vast majority of those crimes not being hate crimes or even related to the decedent's gender, and the rest of us know is like the best murder odds in the country.

And do you really think your father calls you "his son"? After reading this book, I don't. Your dad is a horrible person and I'm sorry for what he put you through. You didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve a lot of what happened to you and I'm sorry the universe has not been kind.

EP poorly writes a transition (no pun intended) into how this time where she doesn't talk to her father reminds her of when she was 19.

it took me four readings through the paragraph to get that message though

she goes and lives with someone who's dating EP's friend's mom

as usual, the space is up to code:

if you could see me face-palm...

girl, what? is a "queer space" anywhere you are?

like, is my apartment a lesbian space because I, a lesbian, inhabit it?

does an IHOP become a lesbian space when I walk in ready for some pancakes?

how does space work?

anyway, she becomes very close with this woman, Julia, and eventually when she stops talking to her father, asks Julia to come and spend time with her

I know I usually do two chapters but I have successfully prodded the desire to clean my apartment into myself, and also I may feel myself dying of cringe, so... here's this.

[trans-advice]

Hi, I’m not trans myself but I have a trans friend who’s in a situation.

Warning for Suicide mentions and depression

I’m gonna use they/them for them even though those aren’t their pronouns because, well, you’ll see.

So I’ve know them for about 6 years now and they’re a few years older than me. In January of this year they came out to me and some other friends as a trans girl. They’ve apparently known they were trans for a good long while and were only out to close friends.

It became clear that they had depression when they had several venting sessions in discord servers that turned into talking them down from suicide and or self harm.

The friend group they came out to me through kinda fell apart which was definitely stressful for them and me and everyone involved but they’re the one I was life/death worried about.

I also found out that their mom is supportive but their dad isn’t. Well recently they let me and other friends know that if they go forward with transitioning (theyre 18 now) their dad will leave.

They’ve decided to “not be trans” so as to not split up their family. No transition, not socially or medically. They said “[chosen name] is dead” , they’re just gonna be their deadname now. They said they’ve masked for 18 years, they can keep going. Obviously I don’t want this for them because I want them to be happy but they don’t think they deserve to be happy.

But logistically I don’t know what to tell them. They don’t want their dad to leave because he’s still their dad and their mom would be unhappy and I just don’t know what to tell them.

The unsupportive ness of their dad is obviously a sizable contributor to their depression and suicidal thoughts. I don’t want to talk them out of suicide again. I want them to not have to be talked out of it because I want them to not even consider it. It’s taking a toll on me and I’m not a professional, I’m just a kid.

Advice? Please?

To my friend if they’re reading this because it will be obvious I’m talking about them: Hi! I hope you don’t mind I sent this. <3

Call trans lifeline: they're more trained they don't call the cops on anyone, and we're not professionals here either.

Seek help from someone trained in dealing with domestic violence! Your friend is an abusive family & needs an escape plan. -- Transition can wait, they need to get out & or distance for their safety, they are in danger. (Especially considering how the political situation is developing.)

They're in an abusive family. I obviously don't know everything, but my suggestion is that if your friend is able to get out of the house away from their family, then do that as much as possible because having autonomy will obviously support bodily autonomy.

When I mention resources for adults, my hope is that it will click that life goes on, and recovery from abusive families is something that is ongoing into adulthood. I'm hoping they & you survive into adulthood. AA & al-anon tend to be carceral with philosophies of "rock bottom" involving "white coats, blue coats, black coats", but still.

Like the reality of potential of divorce happening doesn't just happen due to what your describing. Like there's probably a bunch of other built up things, and it's going to become a "stepping on eggshells" situation. -- The other factor with divorce that needs to be looked out for is property since divorce procedures are also about divvying up the property held by the couple. Of course, couples can stay married but separate because they can't afford to divorce, but like, I feel like that might help with some grounding.

Parent is a verb/role not a noun/body. "Love is an action, not simply a feeling." -- bell hooks. If the father's abusive then he's an abuser instead of a father. There might need to be grief over losing their father, but the father is already lost as of now, it's just a matter of whether the father comes back (as in stops being an abuser, makes amends, etc) or dies abusive. Look up familial rejection, look up resources for adult children of abusive parents etc.

Grief is the feeling one has when the brain's mental maps (such as knowing where access to supportive people such as a father), has to adapt to something no longer being there. Grieving is feeling you have with that. Grief will always be there. Grieving can become "less" with time because you learn how to better adapt to that stress.

Transition is separate from gender identity. Basically your friend is grieving over their father. -- The problem to this whole reasoning of going back in the closet/grave (which I once had to reckon with the fact that I had basically buried my inner children, and it was brutal)... is that the father's body is still above ground & free, & he's abusive, and a threat to your friend's & your friend's family's safety. The rest of the family would still be in danger regardless.

So my advice, in general, would be for your friend to get out of that abusive family, live somewhere else, etc, as much as possible.

Y'all are kids, I hope y'all survive childhood, and if any of y'all get further harmed I want y'all to remember that: the harm was not self-inflicted, that the adults around y'all hurt y'all.

Since y'all are kids y'all also qualify for the Trevor project, but be careful with them because all 988 providers will call the cops if "imminent harm" is believed to be near.

Good Luck, Peace & Love,

Eve

[miss-controversial]

I don’t think I’ll ever have a super clear or definitive opinion on the whole transgender thing. I guess I’m kind of indifferent? Or maybe somewhere in the middle. Like, I have no issue with trans people or trans-related things—I obviously see them as people who deserve rights, respect, and the ability to live happy lives without hate, just like everyone else. But when it comes to specific topics within the conversation, like kids transitioning, bathrooms, and sports, I feel like my thoughts get more complicated.

For example, with kids transitioning, I can understand why someone would want to start young—waiting until adulthood could make things harder. But at the same time, I feel like making a permanent decision before fully grasping what it means is risky. I don’t know if there’s a right answer, but I just feel like it’s something that should be approached with a lot of caution, and a lot more information.

Then there’s the bathroom situation. I understand why trans people want to use the bathroom they’re most comfortable in—nobody wants to feel unsafe or out of place. But at the same time, I feel like it doesn’t take into account how other people (especially and specifically cis-women) feel in those spaces. It’s like, in trying to make one group more comfortable, another group might feel uncomfortable, and that just seems like a lose-lose situation. Maybe the solution is more unisex bathrooms? (Actually, do those already exist widely? I feel like they probably do and I just under a rock, idk)

And then there’s sports. I mean, biologically, men are stronger than women—that’s just a fact. So I don’t think people who were born male should compete against women in sports because it could put women at a disadvantage, depending on the sport. But then again, I’ve also heard that when trans people transition and take hormones, it affects their biology and might level the playing field? I don’t know how true that is, so I’m just kind of ??? on that one.

So yeah, I guess my stance is that I don’t really have a strong stance. I don’t hate anyone, I just think some of these topics are tricky, and I don’t know if there’s a perfect answer to any of them.

[nateconnolly]

hey! if your questions about reading medical research pubs & terminology are sincere, i have a sincere answer for you.

18= adulthood is a regional legal definition; in practice (literally), clinical medicine jurisdictionally adheres to legal definitions in some circumstances, for different reasons. most of the time they are practical. sometimes there is some flexibility, but it's context-sensitive. in my specific area, for example, a pediatric endocrinologist may decide to stop assessing a patient's health for a trans-specific prescription of hormone therapy (which is a ~2 year assessment usually, and there are many many reasons why, but let's not get into it now) once the kid turns 18. now, the endo is legally within her rights to say that, technically, as a pediatrician in a region where adult patients are for LOGISTICAL reasons anyone over 18, so LOGISTICALLY she doesn't treat over-18s. however, she is also vulnerable to then be nicely bullied by another doctor who can point out that, MEDICALLY speaking, a patient does not undergo a magical butterfly transformation when the clock strikes midnight on their 18th birthday, so prescribe the kid his fucking T.

but that's the clinical side. i think people outside of medicine often have no idea how far removed they are from the difficulties and practicalities of medical decision-making. like, the doctor who's making you take additional tests for a specific diagnosis you found online from a viral trend is not diagnosing you based on the latest zeitgeist; she's holding 6,785 differential diagnoses in her brain, and your translation/description of your symptoms can apply to 850 of them. medicine is hard, and science is a doubt- and question-based discipline. you can be confident, but rarely certain.

in research, "standard" terminology is still not globally standard. remember that standardization is a conceit : a useful tool, but not a real rule. pediatric medicine is a branch of the discipline. it theoretically includes young adulthood in its scope. when does yound adulthood end? well, maybe 21, maybe 25. (bodies are weird. i guarantee your sense of how weird bodies are barely scratches the surface.) so you read the methodology of a study not to reconstruct a general term, but to understand the specific parameters of this specific study (or literature review, as the case may be). an analogy for this might be "oncology." again, it's a branch of medicine, but it's a pretty broad term. cancers, even similar types acting on specific organs, are highly highly specific to individuals (that's why cancer research is so fucking hard, time-consuming, and expensive; it's tricky as all hell). so oncology is a useful general word in some contexts, but it's a whole complicated discipline.

so, in short, when you read medical science pubs, they're written for other scientists, clinical practitioners, and funding agencies; there is a limit to the vulgarization they can do. if this is something you're going to do regularly, you'll start to get better with practice. you can also nab an old used dictionary like a merck manual (or find a copy on the world wide web). as you would when reading social science or other humanities research papers, keep note of the footnotes they use in the lit review section; you might find more useful definitions in the papers they're quoting. reading literature reviews in general is a nice way getting an idea of what the hell you're reading about. but pay attention to their selection parameters.

tl;dr: it's just like. constant learning in order to learn. enjoy the process! keep a healthy amount of doubt and humility on your side (i.e., if you don't get it, dig into it, and accord it the time it deserves to be understood), and you'll be fine.

anyway, if you're interested, there's an editorial on the topic of "pediatrics" here : https:// pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov /articles/PMC9411830/

Thank you SO MUCH! Unfortunately I can't seem to find the article that made me ask that question, but this is helpful. I was looking at a research paper about epilepsy treatments, and, as an epileptic, I was trying to determine if a study that involved a 21-year-old would also be relevant to me, a guy in my mid-twenties. (Don't worry, I talk to a real doctor about this stuff, I was just curious and didn't want to bother him about one random paper I found)

[vampirebeverage]

It bums me out that like... when you're perceived as a girl as a kid, there are formative experiences that objectively suck. Everyone's mileage varies, some people barely experience this stuff and for others it's legitimately traumatic, it all exists on a huge spectrum.

There's studies about girl-percieved children being treated differently, held to different standards, having their concerns ignored. Girl-percieved kids have a harder time getting a diagnosis for things like adhd or autism. If you're 8 years old, getting told you have to wear shorts under your skirt if you want to run around and play, but not understanding why, and just internalizing that there is something shameful about your body... that can have a lasting impact on your psyche. In computer class in middle school, I had a shitty teacher who didn't think there was any point in teaching girls how to code, so he ignored half the students and gave his time and attention to the other half.

This stuff follows you into adulthood. Misogyny is not only experienced by adults.

... but the second transmascs talk about having these experiences? Oof. People do NOT wanna hear about it. Yet... for a lot of transmascs, this is just objectively true stuff that happened to them, these experiences made more uncomfortable and impactful by being trans and feeling that unnamed discomfort.

When you talk about it, terfs will go "SEE?! you're trying to escape misogyny by transitioning! this is proof misogyny is sex-based!" ... and that's fucking obnoxious and incorrect.

What really bothers me, though, and something I feel deserves clarification, is a response I sometimes see from transfems. The assumption that by talking about these experiences, you are somehow implying that transfems grew up with "male privilege"... even if you were just specifically talking about things you experienced as a transmasc.

I want to be very, very clear. I do not think that transfems benefit from "male privilege" at any age. I think that the transfem experience is singular, that transfems are also negatively affected by misogyny in different ways in childhood. It broadly seems to me like it's just a different experience of womanhood, even as a kid, even not being out, even before you know that trans people exist (of course, different people will categorize their experiences in a way that's personal to them, so there's no "one size fits all" label due to the vast, vast diversity within the trans community).

I've talked to a friend of mine about this at length, and even though she's transfem and I'm transmasc, our experiences overlap more than they differ (though a lot of that is due to us having the exact same brand of autism). I value my friendship with her, and I like to get her perspective on stuff to make sure I'm not just stuck looking at things from my own, fixed point of view.

I think if we all sat down together and talked about our experiences, and were willing to listen, it would be enlightening and foster solidarity... and we'd all realize that we're all just screwed over by the patriarchy, because misogyny is inseparable from transphobia. And together we can blow up governments. Amen.

[wondermentishere]

damn if i couldve been diagnosed with gender dysphoria as a child that wouldve been a dream... im so happy for all the trans kids who get to transition early with the support of their parents. they are so deserving of the love and access. its a nightmare to struggle with your own biology well into adulthood. i hate the way it complicates and compromises material safety as well. im just so frustrated with it all. i know transitioning isnt everything, but i feel like my life has been put on pause in such a major way

[sillysongwithlarry]

I always check the vibe when introducing myself. Like, do I use my playful name or my serious one.

So I’ve discovered by legally keeping my maiden name that actually in 90% of situations (anything that doesn’t require an ID and isn’t a legal or financial document) you can use your husbands last name “socially.”

So now it’s fun it’s like which name is the vibe for this volunteer sign-up sheet?

[liverbiver9]

Act Two Notes: 後悔莫及 (Too Late for Regrets)

On AO3

Relationships: Jiāng Yànlí & Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn; Jiang Yanli/Original Character; Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn & Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín & Wēn Qíng; Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxian

Characters: Jiāng Yànlí; Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn; Original Characters; Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín; Wēn Qíng (Módào Zǔshī); Wēn Níng | Wēn Qiónglín and Wēn Qíng's Mother; Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī

Additional Tags: Time Travel Fix-It; Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence; Jiāng Yànlí-centric; POV Jiāng Yànlí; Genderqueer Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn; Trans Male Character; Kid Fic

Hello!

TBH I considered posting this fic here but I truly can't be bothered to figure out how to put all the links and everything so I'll just post the whole fic once it's finished on AO3. In the meantime, I have literally So Much to say about this fic because it's been rotting my brain for weeks now, and there's only so much I can fit in the author's notes, so here we are!

DON'T READ PAST HERE IF YOU DON'T WANT SPOILERS

So, act two:

I have SOO much to say about this chapter and I’ll try to go chronological:

I was very careful with how I presented Jiang Yanli here. On one hand, to get the ending I wanted, she needs to literally stage a coup all by herself (at first). On the other, I didn’t want to fall into the same pit so many authors do when trying to bring power to female characters, which is make them girl boss.

I don’t think Jiang Yanli would ever try and build her martial skills, as we get in the text that she had little interest in it. As cool as it sounds, she wouldn’t do such a thing as wield a sword or Zidian unless pushed to great lengths. This fic has her using cooking as a way of cultivation, and I became obsessed with the idea. I did my best to veer away from copying it and instead adding my own twists, which is why I leaned into traditional Chinese medicine, specifically food therapy.

WEI YING WITH SAILORMOON BUNS AND RED BOWS!!!!!!! Pls I’m obsessed 😭😭😭😭 his ponytail is cute and all but I just love the image of him with cute, more feminine hair styles bc he would look SO GOOD! Imagine Lan Zhan’s reaction…

I added the bits about Wei Ying’s tantrums because I wanted him to be a kid, something I don’t think he was ever allowed to be, hence the playful, childish mannerisms he keeps up well into adulthood. “Xianxian is three” is adorable and I love that inside joke with his shijie, but it has some really sad implications. I think Wei Ying was forced to grow up too fast and too early, and that kind of trauma Fucks You Up. Hence, he deserved to have a meltdown once he felt safe.

Wen Ning and Wei Ying being best friends and then siblings? It’s just what they deserve!! They’re so cute

OOOHHHHH BOY I was so excited to finally introduce Cai Yiben!!! This character really grew on me. When I originally had the idea, I was just going to have Wei Ying be trans/genderqueer and let Jiang Yanli have a nice cottagecore-esque Lesbian dream life, but I thought 'You know what? No, she deserves a hot transmasc to rock her world,' and I believe I made the right decision.

Jiang Yanli realizes her feelings for Cai Yiben so late because of comphet, but as a commenter said it could also be read as her finding him more attractive (NOT in a fetish way) once he came out as trans, because trans people are HOT.

Next chapter is a short interlude focusing on Cai Yiben, so stay tuned!

[elierlick]

10 years on hormones! As someone who transitioned as a teen, here’s 10 things I’ve learned: 

1. Listen to trans youth and respect their needs. 

2. If your trans child asks to medically transition, let them. If they don’t, they’re just as trans and deserve the same amount of respect. 

3. Ignore the haters. There are a lot of them and not worth your time. 

4. I still see the same debates about allowing minors to transition as I did 17 years ago. These arguments will change over time and we will win. 

5. I wouldn’t be alive if I wasn’t able to transition before adulthood. The same can be said for many other trans youth. 

6. Building community is the most important thing any trans kid can do. 

7. Transition is a blessing, not a curse. It may be hard but it means living in a more sincere way. 

8. Give your kids agency. They can make their own medical decisions. 

9. Don’t listen to JK Rowling. Writing a children’s book isn’t the same as having firsthand experience with trans kids. She’s a concern troll and doesn’t deserve your attention. 

10. Finally, things don’t simply get better. Trans people fight hard to make them better. Trans youth, in particular, aren’t just our future: they’re leading our movements today.

[autisticlenaluthor]

Not in the cancer au, do you hc any supergirl characters as having medical trauma?

lena for a few reasons and not just because I'm projecting okay so

growing up with the luthor's it's unlikely any of lena's illnesses or injuries would be taken seriously.

she has a fever of 101 and has been vomiting all night? well, she has a test the next morning so she needs to go to school. she can suck it up until the weekend. her academic and social standing would always come before her health in Lillian's-- no matter what.

that sort of repetition (being sick as a kid, told she's fine, forced to push through) would so easily transfer into adulthood. like-- do you see lena as EVER taking ibuprofen for period cramps? no? probably because lena is the type of person to think that if the pain isn't absolutely debilitating than it isn't actually painful and she isn't worthy of feeling uncomfortable.

when it comes to medical trauma in an actual hospital/setting-- I think there would be a lot there too.

in her childhood/teen years, if it got to the point where lena had to be taken to the ER, there's no way Lillian would let her get off easy about it. hey'd make her feel awful-- like she's derailing the family or making something out of nothing. i can imagine her being told things like "we're going to go and all of us will be exposed to -insert illness- from all those kids in the waiting room" or "I can't believe you've dragged us all into this when you're clearly fine". i can also see lillian and lionel complaining to each other about the whole thing right in front of lena-- inadvertently making her wonder if she's really deserving of medical attention

the luthors would also likely downplay lena's symptoms to the doctors too. so even if there iswassomething truly wrong it won't matter because all the doctor would hear is lillian going off about lena being a pathological liar with a far too active imagination.

fast forward to adulthoood, any time lena is sick and needs medical attention she'll convince herself she's just being dramatic and that she's inconveniencing those around her by seeking help (and that she doesn't really need help, she's just doing it for attention)

there's also a huge link between PTSD and chronic illness !! specifically untreated childhood trauma manifesting in physical symptoms as the brains way of screaming "hey something is wrong, if you keep ignoring this I'm just going to fuck up every other one of your organs"

if you combine lena's relationship to being sick/having to see a doctor and all the inevitable gaslighting and manipulation that would occur when seeing a doctor for illnesses manifesting from PTSD, she would inevitably have some sort of medical trauma.

like lena is a woman in her mid 20s-- right off the bat, no doctor is gonna give a shit about what she has to say or if she's in pain. that paired with any mental health problems or past trauma, it just adds from there.

i think it's plausible for any of the supergirl characters to have medical trauma just because of how shitty the system is. lena just comes to mind because she's the most obviously already traumatized and trauma causes your body to get fucked up. but now that I'm thinking about it I feel like nia would also have a ton just from existing as a trans person

[sa2chaogarden]

i know i joke about how it took me a couple years combined with making two fleshed out characters who are transmasc to figure out i was transmasc. i know im the projection king but ive been doing a little introspection lately and wanted to write out my thoughts so hey feel free to read

wheatley I’m so sorry you got named as a joke years ago and it stuck for this long because whoops…

odds are, I treat wheats how i would treat my own past self if i had also figured out gender stuff in my early teens. congrats dude, you get a family that supports you 100% in regards to sexuality and gender also your needs are met they best they can be in regards to your autism. wheats exists in a world where any societal factor I had to repress in my teens, he is allowed to express without question. the people around him love him for who he is. his problems do not come from gender, sexuality, and neurotypical expectations…at least not directly. he still lives in a capitalistic society, but that’s not the point I’m getting at here. like if I was allowed to explore who I was more other than the rigid catholic upbringing I had and was not reprimanded and forced to mask and repress neurodivergent traits, wheats represents a sort of alternate timeline of myself.

yes so many factors are also different, but at this point I feel like he exists as a extension of my younger self, something that could have been if a lot of factors were different. so I treat him with a lot of kindness but also give him character development appropriate for someone who is 16 and still navigating the world (and also the plot of the story he is in) at that age. he isn’t perfect, he has flaws of his own, he still has to deal with growing up, making friends, and high school nonsense.

I love all of my kid ocs equality and each one gets their own sprinkles of self love through projection, but wheats is pretty special for this reason. he was the first step for a couple of my own self discoveries and creative processes so he has a special bread shaped place in my heart.

now matty…

hey, maybe making a taller, transmasc, recolor of yourself to roleplay as has consequences. look, if I had the option to slice my tits off for free and take a potion that makes me taller, gets rid of my hips, and deepens my voice over the span of 24 hours I fucking would. matty wasn’t just me getting the chance to play dnd for the first time and be a funny cursed pirate man once a week. no, I also got to try being a guy for a couple years before realizing that the transmasculine character i was rping was really comfy. from the very start he was someone everyone poked fun at because he really is just some guy in a wacky situation. all the teasing was out of fondness and funny enough, matty helped me realize I was masc. turns out I was also just some guy.

but this lucky son of a shit also has family that knows he’s a big gay trans idiot and isn’t all that neurotypical as well, and I get to be his voice lmao. I only talk mean about him because he’s just so easy to make fun of. I’m so easy to make fun of! but I do it out of love! out of fondness! he doesn’t deserve anything bad or horrible! just suffer the consequences of his actions. all the goofy stupid things that come to bite us both in the ass…I love that shit. I see my own flaws that I’ve learned from, project them onto mattheu and have him learn from them but through his own story.

matty is me if i lived without anxiety or shame of who I was coming into adulthood. more than just a gender presentation ideal, he’s a confidence role model in a way. he’s a pathetic wet cardboard box of a man, but he owns it.

there’s a whole lot more I could probably write but these two are characters are in a current wip and dnd campaign so, fear of spoilers if anyone ends up reading this bc I’m posting publicly

anyway, the middle of the venn diagram of wheats and matty is just me and i love it. love these two and how they helped me figure stuff out while also letting me flex my creative muscles. we’re all just a couple of guys

[asmollbisexual]

Hi hello welcome :)

This is my second legacy challenge I've made for the Sims 4 and I can tell this one is so much better.

Currently this is only a six gen legacy, as I haven't figured out what to do with the other characters I've made yet, so eventually I'll probably make a part two :)

Each generation is closely based on one of my OCs. I always play out their lives but I thought it'd be more fun to turn it into a legacy challenge. I know they have quite a few rules for each one so feel free to cut any out to make it more fun for you if you decide to play :)

Basic Rules

- No money / need cheats (within reason)

- No career / aspiration / skill cheats

- Any and all mods are allowed

- You can play on Normal lifespan, however I find it better to play on Long, that way you have more time to do the challenges and still play with the sims yk?

- Have fun :)

- Also the Sims don't have to have the same names as the character it's based off ofc

Generation One - Kobe Nakamura

Everything seemed impossible to you. Your parents were super strict and super old fashioned, so when your little sister came out as trans, they didn't treat her well. That was the breaking point for you. You ran away from home with your sister and tried to give her the life she deserved, even if it meant giving up on your own dreams... Whatever they were...

Traits : Hot-Headed | Paranoid | Loner

Aspiration : Super Parent

Careers : Salary Person | Tech Guru - eSport Gamer

Skills : Mixology | Video Gaming | Cooking

Challenges --

Create your teen founder and their younger (child) sibling and move to an apartment

Master the Cooking skill before becoming a YA

Play video games with your sibling all the time

Own a bar and drink every night after your sibling is asleep (the stress is too much)

Only have one best friend until Adulthood

Marry that Sim and have 2 kids (preferably twins)

Get to level four of the Salaryperson career, quit after you get married

After you quit your job, your spouse helped you discover your passion. Max the Tech Guru career - eSport Gamer branch

Be the best parent ever

Generation Two - Hanako Ito

You had possibly one of the best childhoods you could ever ask for. Your parents spent everything on you and your sibling, both their time and their money. One Christmas your parents bought you a camera, and by the end of the day your room was covered in photos. Yeah, this is your purpose in life. You have photos of your friends and family EVERYWHERE!

Oh, and you love parties.

Traits : Creative | Art Lover | Insider

Aspiration : Friend of the World

Career : Freelance - Photographer

Skills : Photography | Singing | Dancing

Challenges --

Complete the Friend of the World aspiration

Go to Karaoke with friends and/or family every Sunday

Have a photography studio for both work and personal use

Have your very own club for your close friends, gather every Saturday night to go dancing

Take photos with/of your family and friends, display them all around your home

Marry someone you meet at a Karaoke bar

Have at least one friend in every available world

Generation Three - Jakob Nagame

Ever since you were young you've been in love with cooking. Every night you would help your parent make dinner. Seeing the joy in people's faces as they ate your food gave you great satisfaction. So you decided from a very young age that you want to be a chef!

Traits : Foodie | Cheerful | Squeamish

Aspiration : Master Chef

Career : Culinary - Chef

Skills : Cooking | Gourmet Cooking | Baking

Challenges --

Go to university to study culinary

Master the Culinary career - Chef branch

Maintain a strong relationship with at least one Sim from university

Reach level 10 in the listed skills

Complete the Master Chef aspiration

Marry your childhood bestfriend

Have an outdoor winter wedding

After you get married, have at least 2 kids, adopt at least one

Own a restaurant

Generation Four - Ren Takahashi

Life wasn't the easiest for you, what, with being trans and trying to make it as an actor. Luckily, your parents were incredibly supportive, for both you dreams and being trans. You were very easy to get along with, and you just seem to make friends everywhere you go.

Traits : Romantic | Outgoing | Active

Aspiration : Master Actor

Career : Actor

Skills : Charisma | Acting | Bowling

Challenges --

Get max level in the Drama Club

Date at least four other actors/actresses

Marry a close friend

Go out drinking at least once every other week - always make a friend each time

Max the bowling skill, after having you have kids take them bowling often

Have 2 children

Generation Five - Hide Nishio

Music is your life. You can't live without it. You would sit alone in your room blasting music, and whenever you were with your friends you were always singing with them. You want to write your own songs. You want to be in a band with your friends. You want to live every stereotypical musician's life.

Traits : Music Lover | Party Animal | Bro

Aspirations : Serial Romantic | Musical Genius

Career : Fast Food Employee

Skills : Guitar | Juice Fizzing

Challenges --

Get at least level 2 in all music related skills

Reach level 10 of the guitar skill and make most of your money licencing your own songs

Get a high level in the Juice Fizzing skill - you like to make your own drinks at parties

Go to a bar or night club at least every Friday night

Date at least 10 sims

Woohoo with at least 15 Sims, in as many different locations as possible

Complete the Serial Romantic aspiration first

Make a club, this is your band

After completing the Serial Romantic aspiration, have a romance with all of your band mates (but don't date them). When you start dating your future spouse, ask your band mates to just be friends

After marriage, complete the Musical Genius aspiration

Generation Six - Hannah Jefferson

Unlike your parent, who loves people and all things loud, you just wanted to sit in a cozy conservatory and read... And practice witchcraft. What? It fascinates you. No one ever finds out though, not having friends helps keep it a secret. All your hobbies are typically done alone, and that suits you perfectly.

Traits : Bookworm | Socially Awkward | Maker

Aspirations : Spellcraft & Sorcery | Master Maker

Career : Freelance - Maker

Skills : Fabrication | Herbalism | Wellness | Knitting | Cross Stitch

Challenges --

Reach at least level 5 in Knitting and Cross Stitching skills

Max the Fabrication and Herbalism skills

Reach high level Wellness skill

Go on vacation to Granite Falls at least once a year

Compete the Master Maker aspiration as a YA

Before you marry attempt to complete the Spellcraft & Sorcery aspiration

Sell your candles, knitting, cross stitches on plopsy, then eventually in your own shop

Have a conservatory filled with plants, books, and wellness stuff

Have only one child, any more than that is too much socialising

If you try this challenge or like it please let me know!! :)

[somelazyassartist]

@mulletmarcy THANK YOU BUNNY,,,, PREPARE TO BE ANNOYED!!!

Okay so like,,,, Hallows is 70 (though in the body of a 90 year old due to some magic ghost bullshit that's a long story). Which like, is basically the Elven equivalent of a like, 18-19 year old kid. Like, old enough to do things on her own and about the same maturity level as Esvele, but certainly not an ADULT, ya know?? And yeah, she's "claimed" adulthood, as is Elven tradition, but she claimed it in her 30's, when most others claim it in their 100's- while she's legally an adult no sensible Elf would actually entrust her with the responsibility they would give to an Elf that claimed their adulthood in a more traditional manner. Kay and Vikki wouldn't even call her Hallows if they could see her at this age, they'd still be calling her Traki*.

(*Note: Elves have a VERY different naming convention than humans do, they're not being transphobic- hell, they're trans too! Elves have "child names" and "adult names", all child names are completely gender-neutral without exception, and all elves choose their own name when they claim adulthood, regardless of if they're cis or trans. Kay and Vikki calling her Traki would have nothing to do with gender since Elves have such a different concept of gender anyways, and more with saying "no matter how old you are, you're still my baby". This is not an uncommon practice either, many Elf parents still call their kids by their child names well past 100 years old as an affectionate- and sometimes maybe endearingly embarrassing- gesture.)

But yeah. Naming conventions aside, Hallows isn't just small height-wise, she's just small.

And in a way, that makes me happy when it comes to the Best Friends Force. Like, she's a broken little kid without a home that found a family that loves her, that can give her a sense of safety that she hasn't had in years. She's able to resume learning stuff, she can afford an education for the first time in her life, she could find a passion in alchemy and science instead of constantly worrying about how she's going to afford to eat today or where she's going to sleep that night. She's got stability, for the first time in years, what every little kid deserves.

But also I just feel so bad for her sometimes. Just thinking about how small she was when she ran away from home and how small she still is during the time she met the Best Friends Force.

She was only 35 when she left the Feywild, and she was homeschooled her whole time there. Elves have so long to be children and to learn about the world. While obviously she's able to read and write properly, she hasn't been taught a lot of things, was never shown how to live on her own because they assumed she wasn't going to have to for at least another 60 years. And even then the Feywild is just a lot different from the Material Plane anyways, a lot of what she did know couldn't be applied to her new home and had to be abandoned to start learning how to survive here. On top of that, she had to learn most of what she could from libraries and any books found during her travels, since she couldn't afford to go to a proper school and get a real education in this plane anyways.

Her first relationship was with someone around her age but much more mature than her (not that she realized the difference at the time- since Tia was the first Tiefling she ever met she wasn't aware that there's a HUGE maturity difference between a 35 year old Elf and a 35 year old Tiefling. And obviously Kay and Vikki didn't know either or they would have put a stop to their relationship much sooner instead of just citing it as a kid's enthusiastic first crush). And after she left the Feywild, that was the only true relationship experience she had to go off of until she started dating Esvele, which really left her with a damaged idea of what a relationship was supposed to be like. (Also I feel like I have to say this every time I post about Tiana or Sylvaire but I've seen the fuckin reading comprehension on this site so yeah just so y'all know: Tiana's a bad guy in the story, she does fucked up shit, as villains are known to do.)

But what I had been thinking of the most recently is her being a parent. Specifically when she first adopted Ciggus, since her other kids became a part of her life when she was older and more equipped to handle that responsibility. But like, Hallows was only 70. If we're talking in terms of maturity, she was only a little ways ahead of Ciggus, just enough that it makes a difference and she can still call him a kid compared to her. She was so worried about someone else growing up without a childhood that she continues to neglect her own need for having a childhood. If I'm being honest, I'm pretty sure Hallows feels like that's a lost cause for her, like she'll never be able to go back to being a kid so she just tries her best to make sure everyone else gets that chance to make up for it. She's still so young in her own right, and keeps pushing herself to act much older than she is and to take care of everyone since she never had anyone to take care of her for so long. As much as I love Hallows' kids, and as much as she herself loves them, you gotta admit, it's gotta be stressful for her sometimes. And that's not even taking into account the fact that none of her children- or her wife for that matter- are (full) Elves, which means that they all have a SIGNIFICANTLY shorter lifespan than Hallows does. Which, uh, yeah, is probably gonna not be great for Hallows' mental health. Just a guess. But, we're talking about Hallows' past here, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

Okay like I could seriously go on for a lot longer but I've been typing this out for like two hours and if I don't stop myself now I never will so I'm gonna end this particular post right here though I am always open to being annoying and rambling about my OCs if anyone ever wants to send asks about them okay byeeeeeeeeee <3