#totally made up. no rubric.
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s-k-y-w-a-l-k-e-r · 2 years ago
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Ranking Every Taskmaster Contestant*
Just a list I’ve worked on for the last few years in my drafts and never published, because why would anyone bother to do this without write-ups or statistics, without ever being asked to do it in the first place? But, it’s time to just get it out there.
Basically I judged this on: were they fun to watch, did they bring a character to the show I enjoyed, did they seem to enjoy it themselves, or did they seem to care at all? 
I noticed a few patterns. My least favorite seem to be the women who showed up and didn’t really have any familiarity with the show or any interest in competing. Just up from there is a grouping of hapless middle-aged men who I felt weird watching as they failed. 
On the other hand, if they were too competitive, I didn’t appreciate that, either. I feel bad putting Ed Gamble down at #20—I listen to him on two podcasts, but he was way too aggressively competitive in Taskmaster. It’s also part of why Iain Sterling, who otherwise would’ve had a higher spot on the list just by nature of being Scottish, but he really made an ass of himself throughout Series 8. 
Bias is probably the reason my #1 is my #1. A major theme of many of my top favorites seems to be that they are lanky, smart-dumbass types. 
I know there are several people will disagree with me on. Would love to hear what y’all think! 
Anyway, here it is, updated through season 14.
James Acaster 
Jessica Knappett
Liza Tarbuck
Mike Wozniak
Sarah Kendall
Sara Pascoe
Sally Phillips
Morgana Robinson
Rose Matafeo
Noel Fielding 
Bob Mortimer 
Joe Lycett
Joe Thomas
Fern Brady
Nish Kumar 
Sian Gibson
Romesh Ranganathan
Charlotte Richie
Desiree Burch
Ed Gamble
Sophie Duker
Sarah Millican
Aisling Bea
Asim Chaudhry
Lolly Adefope
Phil Wang 
Dara Ó Briain
Mawaan Rizwan
Chris Ramsey
Russell Howard
Bridget Christie
Katy Wix
Jamali Maddix
Rob Beckett
Josh Widdicombe
Munya Chawawa
Kerry Godliman
Doc Brown
Dave Gorman
Ardal O’Hanlon
Alice Levine
Alan Davies
Paul Sinha
Guz Khan
Al Murray
Jon Richardson
Victoria Coren Mitchell
Iain Sterling
Rhod Gilbert
Richard Osman
Frank Skinner
Hugh Dennis
Mark Watson
David Baddiel
Katherine Ryan
Lou Sanders
Richard Herring
Tim Key
Lee Mack
Joe Wilkinson
Paul Chowdhry
Mel Giedroyc
Johnny Vegas
John Kearns
Tim Vine
Catherine Parkinson
Judi Love
Roisin Canaty
Jo Brand
Daisy May Cooper
*Does not include New Year Treats or any international versions. I’ve only watched Taskmaster UK, I swear someday I’ll get to NZ and Australia! (I have tried Finland but it didn’t stick for whatever reason.)
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circeius-invidioso · 1 year ago
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What I love about the forgotten legions in 40k is that you can construct some wild theories and there is no one to stop you. Games workshop doesn't care but we do.
But my personal concern is.
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The lore says unknown, but I am not satisfied with that response.
So today we will attemp to get inside Malcador's head and answer one of the Imperium's best kept secrets.
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The facts we have so far
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BUT WAIT.
The plot thickens because if we take it as fact that the geneseed was stolen from another legion we have to guess who is the father?
But fear not we have more evidence as to guess who might be.
1) All of the Grey Knights are sorcerers and pretty powerful ones at that.
2) One of the first hand picked, finger pointed, wholeheartedly selected Grey Knights was a Night Lord.
3) They are smug, walking talking warp magic nukes. They have that wap. Wild ass potential.
Also I am not joking. The Emperor saw that Night Lord and I guess was impressed by his human skin collection and agreed for him to join.
Malcador too. But at this point we all can agree Malcy Malc boy was a thief. Bad choices is his strongest suit.
SO.
👏🏻
Dad Theory No1
THE FATHER MIGHT BE. (empasis on might but it would be really funny if it was the truth)
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Same same. But now a different picture. From a better angle.
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The Crimson King is their dad.
Yes I am serious.
My limited research leads me to believe Magnus was the one... used for his geneseed by Malcador to create the loyalist version of nucler houdinis.
And you know what would make this theory even funnier if it was true.
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Oh yes. Or oh no. Its the same at this point.
If the Grey Knights are indeed just a bunch of Thousand Sons but painted chrome and artificially orphaned.
That bastard Malcador.
He created 1000 sons and did not even have the decency to tell them who their dad was.
1000 men left out in the cold. With no place to call home.
1000 Sons -
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1000 SONS PEOPLE THE GREY KNIGHTS ARE 1000 IN TOTAL. THATS THE FINAL CLUE WE NEEDED.
THEY ARE THE SONS OF MAGNUS BUT IN KNIGHT COSPLAY.
THIS IS CANON NOW.
MALCADOR STOLE MAGNUS SEED (THAT SOUNDS WRONG). AND MADE THE GREY KNIGHTS.
AND NOT ONLY THAT RUBRIC HAPPENED AND SINCE THOSE DUDES DON'T KNOW WHO THEIR DAD IS THEY PROBABLY WOKE UP ONE DAY +10 IN ALL THEIR STATS AND COULD NOT EXPLAIN WHY
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Case closed
This is canon now
What will games workshop do?
Refute it?
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mlobsters · 9 months ago
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saw a post yesterday (3 months ago now) that was like finale reactions from not-wincest shippers saying wincest won - but wincest shippers said it wasn't even wincest. which brings me around to my pondering how there's this divide of the ship into wincest / weirdcest / gencest which I'm still not totally sure the difference between the last two. but like, if I'm talking about wincest, I'm not talking about them with fucking required? it's just the dudes in a not-strictly-familial-platonic relationship. which to me, canonically, even in the most literal reading they've got a queerplatonic situation, so that qualifies
i think what i'm boggling over is that (sometimes?) the ship isn't the ship (the key is the key, man) it's like, ship+what they're doing with their dicks.
which led me to reading fanlore's gen and slash and smarm etc articles -> looked for a gencest article, reading the gen sam & dean one and the sam/dean one which is understandably packed with the related shipwar-ish stuff and i'm reminded i just. shouldn't read what anyone has to say about ships and this show. I feel like I'm rarely on the same page as anyone else, which is impressive in a fandom this large. i still don't really understand how the lines between them get drawn. but after all that i read, it sounds like people aren't really in agreement out there on the internet either.
so, this has been in my drafts since december and another post/reply got me to open it back up, someone saying if you want to tag the non-sexual situation it's gencest or weirdcest, not wincest. but I think now my personal understanding/interpretation is that those are just a subset of wincest, not standalone. I think another component of why it gets under my skin too is the inherent devaluation of queerplatonic relationships. a definition borne of the aromatic and asexual communities
and who's to say it isn't romantic? if the lines and beats are romantic, does it stop being so because they're brothers? would we have the same splitting up of the ship if they weren't related? (can guess what my answer would be)
ANYWAY. this was supposed to be how one ship has been split in a way I haven't seen before and find really weird. I can see how say, on tumblr, it's nice to have a tag that's just the qpr relationship, but not to the exclusion of the main ship.
I thought on AO3 it would be more clear cut, but of the 282 tagged with "Gencest | Emotionally Incestuous but Non-Sexual Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester" only 118 are tagged with Dean/Sam. and in the 79 works tagged "Weirdcest | Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester Appear Incestuous to Others Due to Lack of Boundaries", 40 are Dean/Sam.
and while I like the expansion of the tag name to include a definition, what even is emotionally incestuous :p and if there's incest in your definition, how does that not fall under the ship rubric
but being that there's 34,387 works tagged with Dean/Sam, and while there's more things tagged with gencest pre-2020, the majority is 2019+. and weirdcest is nearly exclusively 2021+. so, large consumer of fic that I am, I am sure things that would fall under those labels weren't tagged as such in the main tag.
going back to fanlore, the article about qprs:
Queerplatonic relationship tags are canonized in freeform tags on AO3, but uses in relationship tags are synned to the / tag.[4]
and the reference is:
Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow (Queerplatonic) has been made a synonym of Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow. Works and bookmarks tagged with Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow (Queerplatonic) will show up in Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow's filter.
which honestly made me laugh. that's a very specific situation!
but I think a lot of this, for me, circles back to what is a ship even, and why doesn't love for each other above all else+life partners qualify
and yet, look at me the hypocrite, because I tag stuff with "sam and dean" that are the canonical qpr things, but I wouldn't tag wincest because I know a lot of people would have it filtered. whereas anything remotely shippy in xfiles canon, I tag with msr. *facepalm*
and the advice/explanation I've received about tagging other people's posts, canon gifs, what have you; as wincest - that you might be putting their personal squick right in their notifications. so, don't do that! and I've internalized those rules.
and I guess there's plenty of people that watch the show and think they're just regular brothers ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯
spn fandom is a minefield even with my skirting at the edges of it.
I don't know what anything means anymore
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lunebits · 1 year ago
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ap class tips
for those in ap classes who are struggling. also for those who aren't really. whatever.
just as an intro to my qualifications:
i go to a stem high school (will be graduating next sem!) where all the classes are already advanced as is (our ap classes are also taught differently!) i've taken a total of 10 ap classes during my time, and while that isn't as much as others, i'd say i have a pretty good spread of ap classes i took!
general ap class tips
remember that the ultimate goal for you taking this course is to take the exam and get a 4/5 (reach for that 5!). yes, the grade is important, but that score at the end after that exam might save anywhere from $600-$1200+ in college. so focus your energy on that exam once the exams are encroaching!
make friends in your ap classes. trauma bonding is real (/j) so making friends that will help you study or might save you when you accidentally forgot is key.
and while they all say "study a bit every night!" that's hard to do. the rule of thumb here for every class will be in the categorized sections, so don't worry (i gotchu!!)
ap math (calc ab/bc, stat, physics, chem, etc.)
i personally didn't take physics or chem bc i didn't want to, but i did take bc and got a 5 (yes, i'm so proud)!
rule of thumb for studying at home: do your homework everyday and actually take the time to understand what the hell you're doing. understand what the process is behind solving the problem. be able to pull out the variables. practice, practice, practice. also, this is one of those subjects where it's actually worth it to study it at home everyday.
ANOTHER RULE: practice tests. these math exams are about stamina and speed. if you can solve a problem, great! but now here comes 20 more screaming your name. but, if you can get the timing down before your exam, that's even better. so go waste your saturday afternoon at that mock exam if you need to. another saturday will come in time anyway. ask your teacher for mock exams. get that practice workbook. whatever it takes. get the timing in your hand.
just as a quote from my teacher, "life is about choices, and we are all busy people." don't waste your time doing something that'll waste your time. even if you can't remember it, that's okay. just keep moving and score more points somewhere else. and also, do the easy route. only memorize the easy route.
math is about patterns. patterns rule math. extract that pattern out of that problem, memorize it, and you'll be just fine.
FRQS WILL HURT YOUR BRAIN AND THAT'S OKAY! collegeboard has a very specific way it wants you to answer these questions. the best way to learn the format is to do so many frqs your hands hurt. because in any exam that involves math, you genuinely need to do better on the frqs. they'll land you more points. yes, the mcq might get you that 5, but the frqs become the basic 3 or 4 that you need. your teacher will hopefully teach you the format, but if they don't, the collegeboard ap website has all the past frqs they've ever made.
YOU WILL BE OKAY. I PROMISE. make sure that if you cry, you understand your disappointment then move on to a larger action plan.
ap histories/humanities (art history, u.s history, euro, world, etc.)
i've taken all the histories that my school offers (apush, euro, apwh, apah, etc.)
rule of thumb: don't study at home unless there's a test coming up or you're bad at putting stuff in order.
GET YOUR WRITING SKILLS DOWN PAT. this is the thing that'll get you the most points. that mcq section is a killer, but doing 3-6 (looking at you apah exam) right after might just kill you. so please, get your stamina up. just write. just keep writing.
timeline shit for history. because when it comes down to it, knowing the sequence of events and knowing the events themselves are more important than dates or whatever.
if you're worried about coherency in your writing, jot down a small pre-writing list.
memorize every single rubric. luckily, the dbq/leq rubric is the same across apush, apwh, and euro. you'll get away with just memorizing the two. the apah rubric is a little different, and the ap lit rubric is a little different. just memorize them as best you can.
when writing, cater to your reader. make things easy to spot and easy to grade. they'll give you a higher score if they can clearly see where things are.
just practice mcqs. all the stimulus will have something you can pull out of it (unless it's like apah where you're meant to memorize the works). but every question will have an answer that's in the passage. practice finding that answer. (this one is still really hard)
all these tests are tests of stamina. and sometimes, they're on the same goddamn day because collegeboard hates love us. just keep going. grab a snack. rest your eyes, go.
essays are the bane of everyone’s existence in ap courses because you’re on this strict rubric and have this mythical complexity/sophistication point that you need to give your hopes and dreams of achieving. BUT. but. you’ll be okay. especially for exams like the ap lit/apah exam, you get to come in knowing at least a bit of the exam (for ap lit, a good part of the frq weight. for apah, 90% of the test). TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THAT!! know a novel inside and out. know the works inside and out. you’ll be okay. stretch your hands, breathe, write.
ap sciences (bio, physics, chem, psych, econ)
i've personally taken bio and both econs, but these are all concept based, so the same general tips apply.
rule of thumb: if you don't understand it in class, you need to study it at home asap. seriously. because you sure as hell won’t be able to put it together during class the next day. whats good though is that there’s so many resources online (esp videos!!) for all the ap sciences that it’s actually crazy.
read your textbook. science is great with a textbook in your hand. you don't even need to read the whole thing. just skim through it to add information to your class notes. most times that works.
because the questions are concept based, the mcq/frqs are a little hard to get used to. SO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS: don’t ignore your responsibilities and learn what these questions look like.
flashcards. USE FLASHCARDS. so much of science is not only understanding concepts but applying them. to apply them, you need to know them by heart. and to know them by heart means flashcards to drill yourself.
and speaking of applying your knowledge, you need to take things slowly. approach questions with this framework: 1) read the problem + understand what concept it’s asking about. 2) pull out that information from your sexy brain. 3) solve the problem based on what you can remember. to truly understand, include a lot of examples in your notes. AND MAKE SURE YOU UNDERSTAND WHY AND HOW THEY WORK. the why and the how are more important than the what.
misc tips 🌷
burnout is inevitable if you don’t manage your time correctly. there’s people online that can explain how to manage your energy more than me so please go watch them instead lmfao
try your best to stay on your schedule. the more you push your tasks to this arbitrary tomorrow, the more you absolutely won’t do them.
honey, you need to bring a snack and a water bottle to those exams, you get like a 10 minute break that isn’t enough for the mental taxation (without representation) that happens on those exams. they’re brutal.
the classes themselves are not as bad you think. i promise. most of the time, you’ll actually have fun. and it’s really cool to be learning at a college level. so keep at it! the moment you hate something, the moment you begin to stop trying as hard and your grades start slipping. keep finding the next thing to delude yourself into enjoying (/hj).
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yakultii · 3 months ago
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omg guys the other day i got a mark back on a uni analytical report thing and it said 70% ??? which to my personal standards (which I honestly don’t apply to anyone else) is basically a fail - I was like does she actually hate me the fuk ? but I was ab to give up on life anyway in that moment so I was gonna leave it and deal w it bc I hadn’t slept for 3 days and was mostly incoherent and in pain but then I was like HOLD UP ik it wasn’t my best work and I knew some areas I would have improved but when looking at the feedback it didn’t match up (bc I always be marking my work against the rubric myself too and i tend to be a harsh marker just in case) and was like what the heck it should at least be 80% + ?? so spent like 3 very slow hours rereading it and analysing it myself against the marking rubric and writing specifically in an email how I did the things she said I didn’t etc and asked insanely politely for a re-mark and she emailed back the biggest (excessive rlly) apology letter telling me in a rlly formal manner it was the worst mistake of her career LMAO and that she must have been doing the rubric for someone else’s and that she remarked and gave it 98% !! so anyway boring story noone cares ab but advocate for urself guys (if u wanna) cos ur probs right !! I was like honestly totally understandable no stress broski like I’ve made much bigger mistakes and I would if I had to mark that many assignments I just wanted more marks for temporary dopamine LMAO and by that I mean literally 0.5 seconds cos even the things that mean something to me mean nothing to me at all yikes anyways literally no one asked but I have no one to tell my stories to these days except y’all :,)
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darkdrin6 · 1 year ago
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"Shut up"-rubric
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So, this is Tanya, right?
Tanya, known for her betrayals of absolutely all her allies.
Tanya, who is true to herself and only to herself.
Tanya, walking over heads to her goal.
Insidious, elegant, exotic Tanya, an example of the Egyptian type of beauty, fierce and fiery, ready for any meanness for the sake of her ideas.
No? Is this Tanya noble and wise? Is she playing the role of Jade now? Just because she's Mileena's girlfriend now. And this is not a question, but a statement. Tanya literally left nothing of her canonical image - the one for which she was loved. She was made just another typical "strong" woman from Netflix, and she is put in the place of a more interesting and more memorable character.
Tanya steals Jade's place in this new game and totally undeservedly. Her only merit is that she has a connection with Princess Mileena. She literally snuck into this game through the bed, guys.
And you know that it is.
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dual-fantasy · 11 months ago
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chase fic has the worst timing cause my gen2 obsession is coming back. i love mike in a way nobody else does or understands. he actually kind of sucks a little bit and its not okay but it is justified. they shouldve let him kill scott i think. i want them to kiss. as an experiment. party scike is in the house 2nite. but again in a way nobody else understands. both of them suck just different amounts and i think that makes them compatible in an awful way. they hate each other. there is no romance in their relationship its probably for tax benefits. people want them to kiss i want to watch them fight. three dollars on mike winning. mike understands his mental health but would rather lick a busy sidewalk then ever confess it. scott has no idea whats going on up there but he'd tell anyone as a funny. they are made for each other. jo as well. my queen forever. she was the blueprint. theyre both dog motifs but in awful horrible ways. in the same way actually. i think theyd be great friends but in the worst way. the mutant maggots plus scott mean a lot to me actually. worst team plus scott ever. the most dysfunctional found family. emphasis on dysfunctional. they hate each other and have the worst time ever whenever more then 3 of them are together. Grave Dog. sorry for gen 2 posting i need to rewatch the reboot to like chase more then them again
don't apologise for gen 2 posting you're so real. party scike is in the house tonight. mike means a lot to me too but one of his best qualities is that he's a bitch sometimes. imo he isn't always a nice person but it's completely justified, but that justification doesn't make him a good person. he's at least a little bit of a cunt and ppl seem to make him some perfect and "wholesome" guy because they can't stand that a character has morality deeper than the black and white rubric they have.
scike is real too you're right about them. they shouldn't get a happy ending they need to be violent. they shouldn't kiss they should clean their blood off eachothers hands after they fight. they aren't in a good relationship it's bad and tragic but it's everything. they're also funny as shit. they're both just going through shit and shenanigans. very funny but also they're the actual worst. scike is awesome
jo was the best too. to be honest I didn't like her but on a rewatch she was literally the realest character. she's an icon shes the moment she's incredible
the mutant maggots were one of the best teams in total drama. on tier with team Amazon and team skunk butt. easily one of the top 5 at the very least. theyre never having a good time literally ever they literally all hate eachother so so much and also they're sooo sweet and mean everything.
again dw about gen 2 posting they're so good
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crimsonblackrose · 5 months ago
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.
They have a pumpkin lantern!
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Miguel what is your room decorations? A skull...a monster (looks kinda AoT but idk) I kinda expected more spiderman for a guy whose grandma is supposed to be making him a spiderman costume.
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Seriously, Miggy what is alll of this? It's like horror art.
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I also don't know who this dude is that's on his wall multiple times. also the one wall of spooky horror looking art with the other wall of cutesy art is a mood. But also...I don't know any of these references. 😂
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I forgot his first choice for costume was deadpool. I wonder if they didn't put any of those characters he wanted up in his room due to copyright. Since this is pre-netflix money and I assume most of it went to music rights. But again, I might just be missing the references to all these things.
"Miggy what happened to your hand? Uhhh.... You don't want to know." His grandma thinks he injured himself jerking off. 😂
So he's behind on a bunch of bills $430 for a late loan payment, he's made 20 payments but still owes 40 and is behind by like what looks like 2 months.
He owes $45.84 for power via Southern Power Source
My question related to the bills is...didn't he use Sid's check? How little did Sid give him? Or I suppose the other question is where did that money go?
omg I just noticed the LaRusso stairs. Those tiles are so cool!
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Looks like someone drives Jeep Rubric...Kyler maybe? Did Kyler show up first thing? It's not like they're neighbors? Why's he out of the car? Are they driving together or seperate?
Amanda: "outside of wasting a few bucks of tuna he seemed harmless"
AMANDA THAT WAS NOT CHEAP TUNA. That was ridiculously expensive tuna that was wasted. TORO is not cheap.
I mean it's not that Daniel's gotta trust Johnny over Sam, it's that neither Sam doesn't know Kyler's awful (at the moment) and Daniel's met the guy once. There's more nuance to the situation. Plus technically Sam's 'fallen in with the wrong crowd'. She's throwing parties at your house without permission and not cleaning up after them. She's getting into car accidents and not telling anyone about it. She's not hanging out with her old friends. Like it's interesting how most shows put the push on "be friends with people who care about you" but Amanda and Daniel are like "so she wants to be popular" that's a great choice who cares what the people she hangs out with are like. Which do they even know these knew friends of hers?
Louie's movie recommendation: Jungle Fever
West Valley High School home of the Mountain Lions: "can't hide our lion pride" "Keep calm and roar on"
Demetri would rather play a game then get hit in the face...proceeds to get hit in the face later by Kreese.
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2 things: 1 the vape city is new. And 2 that is a completely different address. Isn't that where Tom Cole's shop is?
Johnny's out here taping his signs up on palm trees near the Encino Commons and the first guy he tries to offer karate classes to is like a grandpa. Also, despite his protests on teaching women, he totally tries to give a flyer to a woman jogging past.
Sam has her own en suite bathroom. Which means she and Anthony don't fight over their bathrooms. Lucky, but also disappointing for sibling fighting.
I think the closest we get to TKK Daniel rambling yet is Amanda catching him snooping on Sam's laptop. Goes from wifi issues to making broccoli rabe to wondering if shark tank is on tonight. 😂
Miguel's backpack is also a Dodgers backpack. Yet nothing Dodgers related in his room.
New music mention: Ratt
The school has a swimming pool. Is this the same school that Johnny and Daniel went to or is it new? Does that mean they had swimming gym classes? Daniel did have access to a pool? Or is it a different school or possibly an addition?
"I thought you new this guy." "Of course not I lied." and Miguel's "awwww." like he's exhausted, disappointed but also not surprised.
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What is that?!
Do you think Johnny did Miguel's make up for the skeleton?
I get that a. it's a piece of jewelry and b. it's like innocent but not actually innocent because of Kyler but also Daniel is a chaperone and his job is to keep the kids out of the classrooms...and at the dance...so...he's doing his job.
Kyler lying causes so many issues because everyone believes him. 😂
What sort of teen drama fake app is a 'new video alert'? Like does Yasmine just have everyone's phone number in the entire school???
...Miguel there's no zipper there. The zipper is in the back...how did you? Were you just miming going to the bathroom? Why? So your friends wouldn't feel lonely because you didn't have to go to the bathroom? Also does this mean Johnny and all the cobras had to treat those things like rompers?
So is Kyler captain hook and his friend is smee?
Why would the bathrooms also be the locker rooms that students can lock themselves into???? That seems super unsafe.
I guess if there's a photo of Ali then it must be the same school, but they must've changed their school colors from green and white.
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salty-professor · 6 months ago
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Degree Mills
The Department of Education defines a degree mill as a school that has fake accreditation and where the students do not have to do any work. That is certainly true.
However, insiders, that is me, and a lot of other folks who do the work in higher ed agree that a degree mill is a place where the fix is in from the moment the student walks on campus. They find it sick to know that regardless of performance, as long as the student has a pulse and is in good standing with one or twenty student loan services (this is the real key, students=$$$), that student will graduate with a legitimate degree even though the student will not have learned a fucking thing.
It is gross. I hate it. Blech.
I have a confession to make…
I accidentally got a job at a degree mill. I didn't mean to. I was looking to pick up some summer teaching. Teaching full-time doesn't pay all the bills and sometimes, we get sick of teaching the same few classes over and over, so, while we don't want to leave our full-time teaching posts, we pick up adjunct jobs at other schools.
So, I saw this ad for an adjunct job at a BIG school. This is one of those schools that is so big that it will survive the coming edpocalypse without so much as a blink. When the small, liberal arts schools fail, and shut down these mammoth, too-big-to-fail schools will roll on until there is just one monster Hydra University. It is an online job so I didn't have to commute. It pays better than what I would make doing overload work at my current job. Most importantly for me, the school is a non-profit and accredited, so I wasn't going to be doing garbage…or so I thought. I did my training and was impressed. I mean, they use an online learning management system designed by sadists. Still, it wasn't the end of the world. I've used it before. It isn't my full-time job. I could suffer for a few hours per day of this bullshit. No problem. I signed the contract. I read the text. I whistled a merry tune.
Then, I saw the course shell.
I have zero ability to change anything. I can't alter the due dates to meet my schedule. I can't close the discussions after they are graded. I can't even change the late policy. OK. So, I guess this is all about quality control. They need to be sure folks are doing it "right" so OK. I can give good, thoughtful feedback and do some teaching on the back end. Individualized learning is awesome anyway. Then, I saw the rubrics. They are already filled out with approved written feedback and they only have three levels. The student either gets all the points, most of the points, or NONE of the points. Really? Really? Who would EVER give a student a zero unless there was a missing assignment? No one who isn't a total fuckhead, that's who. I am not, for the record, a total fuckhead.
Thus, even when my students totally miss the point, like swing and miss, I have to mark that middle row on the grading rubric. That means, as long as the student turns in something, even if it is crappy and has a grammar error in every sentence, the student will earn a C. The school is accredited because every week the faculty clicks the pre-made rubric and thus the students get regular, substantive feedback. Also, as long as they submit something, the students will pass. The retention and graduation rates put me through the roof. Student satisfaction must be sky high because when asked if they like the place and if they feel the teacher was engaged, students will say yes. After all, how could they not?
I can't change the system. It is a massive school with lots of lawyers and I assume, one or twenty lobbyists as well. For now, I am taking detailed notes. I have videos and screenshots. I am building a file that I will send to the DOE and the regional accrediting body. They will likely not give a shit, but I give a shit and it is all I can do. I am not going to walk away from the students I currently have. I can't quit on them. That isn't fair. They can still learn some good stuff. I will fight the good fight within the virtual confines of my classroom. I will give different feedback. I will push them to do better. I will make audio comments or video comments and I meet with them and I try, and try, and try, to get them to learn. To be better. I will explain that while they are going to pass, that isn't the point. Grades are pointless if they don't learn anything.
I know there will be students who care. I know there is some great information they can take from my class. I can do the work. The extra work. I can be the shining light in the degree-milled darkness. I will work hard because I care.
#educationisaright, but it must be earned.
I need to take a shower.
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doublewritten · 3 months ago
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hospitalterrorizer · 8 months ago
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diary213
4/15-16/2024
monday - tuesday
my shift got put later, tomorrow, and it's still only 3 hours.
so i guess that's good. the people who manage schedules at work honestly seem so lost and it is so fucking annoying, one of my days off is just gone now, replaced with another meaningless shift to waste more of my meaningless life.
my gf did make today a lot better, she got me a cake, she got me chicken katsu curry, it was all good, then she sort of upset me bringing something up i don't like her talking about, something that happened at work that is funny but makes me basically dysphoric and i don't like hearing it talked about at minimum but it's not like she is really thinking she just wants to tell her brother a funny story it's like okay but i just felt bothered by it. i don't want to reproduce it here but i guess the gist is that a kid kept saying i look like timothy chalamet and whatever. it makes me feel not good thinking about it but what am i supposed to do. i guess a lot of people might agree. my gf's brother did, which made it worse. now she feels guilty, i don't know what to do about that. i just feel bad, it doesn't matter though, i told her it doesn't matter and it's fine and she shouldn't care how i feel. she just wanted to tell her brother something funny.
today at work, since it is a birthday place, a bunch of kids came in, and stuff, and it was their birthdays and i felt how totally and viscerally meaningless mine has been made surrounded by them, this is stupid and dramatic i guess and it's not even my birthday anymore so i can't even justify crying about it but i just felt so unhappy about the fact that i am like being used up like some kind of coal or whatever to fuel like, this very shallow joy offered to children, sit and spin on a ride, sit in cars and bump into eachother, gamble to win plastic shit that will be the only token that enables any memory of this place at all, there will be no stories, there will be nothing, a perfectly carried out rubric of events in an order you choose maybe but really are guided by architecture, a super-nothing, there is no memory possible of the place beyond some kind of vague location-based nostalgia for interiors and cheap design. do any of us remember distinct things that happen in chuck-e-cheese, or anything similar? i think only bad things and the rare few good things have more to do with people and proximity making it not be the place it is meant to be. all memory of places like this necessitates rupture. i am put to work to prevent rupture.
anyway i know i'm being like a baby or whatever. i shouldn't care. i shouldn't care, it's stupid to be so upset, it's so stupid though, i feel like extra upset because of it not even being my birthday anymore so it's like i can't even be really upset on my own birthday when anyone would be like okay with it. like i just have to get on with it, my time is on a conveyor belt i have no control i am deposited back into my life right as the day is ending, i get home late, i enjoy like an hour and a half of 'birthday' and then nothing. same same same same same same same after that and my gf will be nice to me but she can only take so much of me being annoying.
and i just feel hideous .
but not too much longer, not too much longer it'll be through, this job. i hope.
i just keep thinking about how i don't ever really know what i want. i at least tried to do things i know i wanted to do today, i had figured things i want to do outside that aren't just vague nothings, i always need other people to direct me. i wanted to go to a thrift store, i wanted to go to a restaurant, i wanted to go home. the one day i at least imagined was just impossible, it's just super impossible and pointless to want to do things, from where i am at least. i am just so used to having others decide for me, i just let my job decide what my time actually means. #lol.
but this is all stupid and so embarrassing, i really shouldn't even be able to think like this, but i am. isn't that horrible. it probably means i have some kind of personality disorder and should be executed or something.
unexpectedly, music is going okay i think, though. that is very nice i think. i figured out part of what is wrong with this one song is just the imbalance in the channels, i need to double the guitars, and then have the synths kinda sit over top, maybe put them back in the middle, that might be cool. it definitely makes the guitars sound a lot better to be doubled and panned like they are now.
am i just some kind of resentful little worm? i don't want to be. i want to be kind, and i want to be without ressentiment. i want to be better than this, but i just fall into this kind of thing, it's like giving up but worse, it feels so venomous and hostile, like it's just me turning into a cancer along my self, a terminal negativism.
i will probably have to make peace with working this song out better tomorrow but it's definitely a lot closer to what i want, i think, or hope. but i'm sure i can learn to be disappointed tomorrow and stuff all over again and over again and over again.
but i think it is close, honest, or this is at least the way to do things, and maybe some stuff needs to change in the song otherwise, like maybe make the low end of the kicks less loud or round? that seems like a good idea, other stuff along that path, maybe just by a tiny bit cutting more lows from the guitars? probably also a good idea. i think these are things to move forward w/ for this song, maybe also look into the unity gain thing i have going on and see what i can do to make that a little less punishing feeling.
anyway, i need to sleep,
and i do always feel less crazy after sleeping and tomorrow's a short shift, so
byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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tjswritingstuff · 11 months ago
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One of my professors opened their course a couple days early. I have already read all the things and watched all the videos they have up.
I also checked the grade book, because even though future assignments are not posted, they are in the grade book. I can see what the assignments are going to be if not any details yet.
Here’s my concern. Each journal entry is worth 2pts but only 7 will count toward the grade, so (14pts) total. The midterm is worth 20, and the final is worth 20, but the critical essay is worth 40pts. Total available points not counting the Essay is worth 54pts. I better rock that essay!
I can get full points on everything in that course, but the essay will be the thing that really determines my grade at the end of the semester is.  I guess it’s a good thing I’m confident in my ability to write.
I enjoy knowing this information. I like it when there’s a rubric that shows exactly how the points are allotted. It tells me where to focus my efforts.  
I can’t put the assignments into my planner yet because I don’t have solid due dates, but it looks like the journal entries are going to be due each Sunday by Midnight. So, 14 weeks, 14 entries, each already has a name, which also tells me in what order each novel will be assigned.
I might be a little excited! I might have made a happy squeal sound when I got the notification on my phone that one of my courses was now available.
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averysmolkirbo · 3 months ago
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PEOPLE SEEM TO THINK SO
ive lost ENTIRE friendships over this kind of thing. how am i supposed to know when you want to bw comforted by a lie?? its worse when you say "be honest" and get mad. Like no. you dont get to do that.
also this has not only lost me friends but has actually cost me ACADEMICALLY.
basically the thing was we had to do a presentation on a bunch of music artists (including one my teacher said was her favorite) and whilst doing research on said favorite i found that they really werent the best person (their wikipedia had a whole separate controversies section) and because it was factual information that i thought was important i put it in my presentation.
i get my grade back and its fine, but im going over what i got wrong and she took points off for the part where i reported less than favorable things on her favorite artist, with a snide comment like "you need to be more careful about what you're claiming against people" despite the fact that these weren't even new allegations, or allegations at all. It was factual info. IT WAS ADMITTED BY THE ARTIST THEMSELF. IT TOOK ME ALL OF 15 SECONDS TO FIND A CREDIBLE SOURCE ON IT. FUCK YOU MEAN "BE CAREFUL WHEN CLAIMING" I AINT ""CLAIMING"" SHIT, IM TELLING YOU FACTS. IT WASNT IN THE RUBRIC THAT WE HAD TO LIE ABOUT IT.
she totally just got mad at me for finding (very surface level, mind you, i'm no fbi agent) dirt on her favorite so she couldnt have a clear conscience about liking them. Similar thing happened to an artist she didnt really like, didnt bat an eyelash. biased bitch.
Also the way she made it sound was like we were personally gonna show it to the artist themselves, or put it in some highly published journal or something. no!! she was literally the only person who would be seeing this. this random artist isnt gonna have their feelings hurt if thats what youre so worried about.
also i think she already hated me for some reason and probably just did that because she hated me. and i have no idea why she even hated me. I did my work. I was nice to HER. I wasnt disruptive. she just hated my undiagnosed autistic vibe or some shit.
and on a side tangent on her, because it was a french class the class had the opportunity to go on a trip and it was (for the most part) great but near the end of the trip she was like super shady and started shit-talking MY MOTHER behind her back, FOR HELPING SOMEONE. And she really thought she was fucking slick bitching about her to our innocent guide in french, thinking she'd have no clue she talking about her. The only problem with that is my mom just so happens to have her bachelor's with a MAJOR IN FRENCH. she used to be a highschool french teacher, just like her. She understood everything they said. When she told me about it i was so pissed i very nearly went up to her face and asked her what her fucking problem was.
like you're not only deciding to say this at all, but you're doing it someone else, behind her back, and in a different language because you know you're being a bitch.
so glad that was one of the last times i ever had to deal with her because couldnt stand her after that. good fucking riddance.
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garudabluffs · 2 years ago
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Norman Solomon and David Barsamian, Living in a Warfare State
Page 1 of 3 pages
"The invaluable Costs of War Project has long reported that close to a million people, including Americans, died in the major zones of conflict in this country's post-9/11 war on terror. It's worth stopping a moment to take that figure in. Almost a million deaths "" and mind you, that's in a war (or actually a series of conflicts) that, despite what you might hear in this country, is not over. From Syria to Somalia, Americans are still pursuing it.
Only recently, however, the Costs of War Project's Stephanie Savell released a new study suggesting that there may have been another 3.6 to 3.7 million indirect deaths that can be attributed to the conditions created by those conflicts. So, in total, we may be talking about almost five million dead people from the American war that began as a response to al-Qaeda's devastating air assaults on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. Consider that the definition of a genuine hell on earth.
And yet, as Norman Solomon has made clear in the very title of his remarkable new book, War Made Invisible: How America Hides the Human Toll of Its Military Machine, remarkably few Americans have any sense of just how devastating (not to say unsuccessful) that now more than two-decade-old war on terror has been, or how many more civilians this country has killed than al-Qaeda ever could have. Had the media here dealt with that toll the way it is now "" all too correctly "" dealing with the civilian toll the Russians are inflicting in Ukraine, we might be on a different planet, but no such luck."
The Wars We Don't (Care to) See Aggression Made Easy
By David Barsamian and Norman Solomon
[The following is excerpted and adapted from David Barsamian's recent interview with Norman Solomon at AlternativeRadio.org.]
"I mean, if you add up the numbers, in the last nearly twenty-five years, the country by far the most responsible for slaughtering more people in more lands through wars of aggression is" yes, the United States of America."
"I sat through the two-week trial in the federal district of northern Virginia of CIA whistleblower Jeffrey Sterling and I can tell you it was a kangaroo court. That's the court Julian Assange has a ticket to if his extradition continues.
And what's his so-called crime? It's journalism. WikiLeaks committed journalism. It exposed the war crimes of the United States in Iraq through documents it released, through the now-notorious video that came to be called "Collateral Murder," showing the wanton killing of a number of people on the ground in Iraq by a U.S. military helicopter. It provided a compendium of evidence that the United States had systemically engaged in war crimes under the rubric of the so-called War on Terror. So, naturally, the stance of the U.S. government remains: this man Assange is dangerous; he must be imprisoned.
The attitude of the corporate media, Congress, and the White House has traditionally been and continues to be that the U.S. stance in the world can be: do as we say, not as we do. So, the USA is good at pointing fingers at Russia or countries that invade some other nation, but when the U.S. does it, it's another thing entirely. Such dynamics, while pernicious, especially among a nuclear-armed set of nations, are reflexes people in power have had for a long time."
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https://www.facebook.com/v2.10/plugins/like.php?action=like&app_id=175590244813&channel=https%3A%2F%2Fstaticxx.facebook.com%2Fx%2Fconnect%2Fxd_arbiter%2F%3Fversion%3D46%23cb%3Df2c853d16caa408%26domain%3Dwww.opednews.com%26is_canvas%3Dfalse%26origin%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Fwww.opednews.com%252Ff29d98e3e3fa5%26relation%3Dparent.parent&container_width=167&href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.opednews.com%2Farticles%2FTomgram-Norman-Solomon-an-Military_Military-Industrial-Complex_Pentagon_Russia-230530-281.html&layout=button_count&locale=en_US&sdk=joey&share=false&show_faces=false&size=smallGeneral News 5/30/2023 at 11:54 AM EDT    H3'ed 5/30/23
Tomgram: Norman Solomon and David Barsamian, Living in a Warfare State
By Tom Engelhardt       (Page 3 of 3 pages) Become a premium member to see this article and all articles as one long page.   No comments
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Solomon: Technology's never going to save us. Robert McChesney, the scholar of media history, has written eloquently about this. Every advance in technology was accompanied by these outsized promises that therefore we will have democracy. That's going back to the first telegraphs, then radio, then broadcast TV, then cable television. At every step, people were told, hey, this technology means that no longer do we have a top-down relationship to power, we can make the changes happen ourselves. And yet as we've seen with all of those technologies, and this includes the Internet, technology never freed anybody.
Barsamian: What's to be done? What practical steps would you recommend?
Solomon: I believe in organizing as the key element in turning around such dire circumstances, including corporate power, class war waged from the top down, and the militarization of our society and our foreign policy. That means a shift in mindset to see that we're not consuming history off the shelf like Wonder Bread. As the saying goes, whatever your first major concern may be, your second should be the media. We need to build media organizations and support the ones that are doing progressive work, support them financially, support them in terms of spreading the word and also of learning more about how to "" and actually implementing how to "" organize both people we know and those we don't. And I think that's pretty antithetical to the messages the media regularly sends us, because really, the main messages from, say, television involve urging us to go out and buy things (and maybe vote once in a while). Well, we do need to go out and buy things and we certainly should vote, but the real changes are going to come when we find ways to work together to create political power both inside and outside the electoral arena.
When you look at the corruption of the Federal Communications Commission, for instance, that's not going to change until different people are in office "" and we're not going to get different people in office until we elect them to overcome the power of Big Money. And there's also the real history that we need to be reminded of: that everything we have to be proud of in this country was a result of people organizing from the bottom up and generating social movements. That's truly where our best future lies.
Barsamian: You conclude War Made Invisible with a quote from James Baldwin.
Solomon: "Not everything that is faced can be changed; but nothing can be changed until it is faced."
Solomon: Technology's never going to save us. Robert McChesney, the scholar of media history, has written eloquently about this. Every advance in technology was accompanied by these outsized promises that therefore we will have democracy. That's going back to the first telegraphs, then radio, then broadcast TV, then cable television. At every step, people were told, hey, this technology means that no longer do we have a top-down relationship to power, we can make the changes happen ourselves. And yet as we've seen with all of those technologies, and this includes the Internet, technology never freed anybody.
READ MORE https://www.opednews.com/articles/Tomgram-Norman-Solomon-an-Military_Military-Industrial-Complex_Pentagon_Russia-230530-281.html
June 13, 2023 publication book review https://www.amazon.com/dp/1620977915/ref=nosim/?tag=tomdispatch-20
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seasideretreat · 2 years ago
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I am sitting in my living room writing to you. I need to understand whether you are confident in the new era. A new era is coming and you will be living in it for the next thousand years. We are searching for different outcomes for the current world, but there ain't no possibility for the current world to change, it is all horrifying nonsense. I think you are an amazing person, but there is something weird about it all, because there ain't no reality that we can grasp. I don't know, the purposes of existence are vague and extreme, and nobody appreciates the things that we do to make ends meet, whatever is really going on. I wish to tell you how purposeful your work is. Everything you do is useful, our ideas are manifest, the world requires our attention. Whatever we do, we won through ardent application of our mental and physical resources.
But that's all bullshit. I have to speak clearly. Although, maybe not. There's nothing known about the full world; nothing is foreseen. Therefore, I think everyone requires a bit of work to be done - no else knows what it all means. Do we feel good or bad? Are we real or just imaginary? These are the questions of the full philosopher. He can do great things, yet never amount to anything. There ain't no clear light shining from me to you: everything is crazy. I wish, therefore, to make a clear assessment of the full world before all the crazy people that do things. Everybody needs a particular thing to live, everybody needs a particular thing to survive. Everything we know is crazy, and yet the reality of things is not known by the many who hold up the foundations of the crazy world: for can we really do anything? No, we can only make amends for little things and not do anything that is real. Are there really real things? I suppose not. Little things are made crazy by ordinary things: nobody gets what is real and what is not real. There's indeed a kind of original sin doctrine in the crazy layers of the ordinary world, crazy doctrines that make us wonder what is really there and what is not there. I know, that real things can be known through the clear trajectory of ordinary work, but ordinary realities are subsumed by real rubrics that create a disposition of things that make us wonder what the reality of things really is. We don't know what we can do, we can't see anything happen, because there is no real world to be seen, there is only the creation of creation, the mind of the mind. If we do good things, ordinary things will happen that will orchestrate the return of many things, that make us constantly wonder what the reality of things really is, we must do things to make sense of things, and that makes us stronger. If we do good things, ordinary things can also happen, and the things we do are collected under the rubric of ordinary reality and then send away to far off places, never to return to the here and now. The best things we do are made crazy, and therefore the happy things that create a necessity are fulmigated in total against the creation of ordinary necessity, that is given a place in the construction of social reality, and thereby becomes a reality even though there is no power that really works. I don't know what the reality of ordinary things really is, but we know the happy truth that makes something real is obsolete and grandiose, even though the greatest power is still invisible.
If I do good things, I always fail in the last analysis to make sense of the ordinary things that make a good selection of ordinary things. Therefore, the real capacity for ordinary goodness, as far as we can surmise it in common parlance, is given a place in the grand trajectory of space and time and thereby becomes a creativity of the highest order, a magnitude that corresponds to simple realities in the grand scheme of things, but is never created in the strict sense, even though there are many layers to it. I am the creator of a new science, and there is much safety in that, even though we can never know the power of the ordinary world. The simple things that we need are given up by clear realities that need no automaticity in the strict sense to succeed, but only clear realities that mean something to wise and simple-minded fools that make sense of the world through indirect and wise means, but that can't make sense of the fullness of the world, even though there is a reality in the world that makes us see the fullness of ordinary reality and makes us want to inhere in the fullness of the ordinary life, that makes us see the fragments of the full life in the hiding trajectory of space and time that gives us a kind of things in the vast majority of the universe. Little things, that keep going around and around and make us see the facility of little things with big things, gives us a little correspondence in the vast majority of things and makes us want to go ahead and destroy the full majesticness of happy events that go nowhere. In the little analysis of happy things, good things will come to the people who wait in the shadows and do good things to each other. But the vast majority of ordinary people cannot comprehend the direct necessity of the happy events in the fullness of the ordinary world; therefore, the little things in the vast majority of things are subsumed under the rubric of space and time and therefore forgotten by the happy eventuality of normalness in the guise of expedience and continuous application, even though we don't know anything in the first place. That's why I say with the many people that we need to gather under the rubric of space and time, that there is a reality in the vast infinity of the world that we can appreciate, but that don't work in the ordinary trajectory of happy events, because we don't know them in the first place. That's a small side note to the continuous flow of events. The continuous flow of events cannot be understood, it doesn't even really exist, but the long march from simplicity to facility is given in the ordinary succession of pure events, even though we can't appreciate the mundane necessity of the happy events that make sense of ordinary things, without giving them up to normality or necessity, but that is another story. Nevertheless, the givenness of strict isometric necessity is a thing that we don't know unless it is given to a crazy automaticity that makes things work under the guise of happy events. Constantly, then, we see the things happen, but we can't appreciate the necessity of the cruel world, that continually undermines us, because we cannot know the facility of the little things with the continuous things, and nothing good can come of it. Therefore, the happy existence that we extract from the little cogregation of normal things is a crazy existence, that means nothing and that gives us no pleasure, but somehow manages to co-exist, in the last analysis, with the happy things that we need and that somehow becomes a better and wiser totality, even though we have no control over it. The happy eventuality of things is just a visage that makes some kind of thing happen in the constancy of the universe, but if we work hard to achieve some kind of equilibrium with the surrounding world, something good may come out of it (even though we do not ever grow to the fullness of power and strength that we need to purport the necessity of pure ideality, in the strict fullness of that word, which is altogether flat and digested).
This is what I call Confucianism. There is nothing mystical about it, and it is just a matter of hard work. But the work is in itself rewarding and exciting: good things happen because of it; and ordinary things are generated in the fullness of space and time, which gives us a pure necessity that makes us feel the happy knowledge for time, that grows in time and makes us see the fullness of happy existence in due time, and with power and strength that grows in time. Give me then, the truth.
If I see the truth, I don't see the untruth. The fullness of the word is given in the expressiveness of ordinary necessity, but there is no escape from pure ideality. I know what the ordinariness of simplicity is, but I know no pure ideality. Therefore, what I know is small and crazy, but what I wish for is powerful and direct. I want it, and I can make it work, but the good things are crazy and don't matter. I am not free. Nothing can liberate me from the necessity of pure life, and there is no life.
That's what I call Daoism. We see that both depend upon each other, but there is a difference. Confucianism doesn't really end, whereas Daoism does, but Daoism has no project, whereas Confucianism does.
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alexzandriathegood · 2 years ago
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Set Intentions for Yourself or Fail Spectacularly
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This year, I've been questioning myself more and trying to understand what I mean when I say “I am an artist.” I’ve found myself feeling so unsure in the past that the statement invariably evolved into the question: “Am I an artist?”
Watch the video (available 3/20 at 4pm PST): https://youtu.be/r2UnQY58tGs
What are the thoughts and actions of a real artist? These were actually  hard questions for me to answer, years after I had already decided I wanted to dedicate as much time and resources possible to making this a reality for myself. After a series of unrealistic expectations and failing business strategies I felt so lost. This made me dive even deeper into the advice of art PHONIES on the inter-webs, anyway I digress, there will be plenty of time to address those individuals later.  
This year, I had to focus on what in the actual F I wanted to accomplish in order to lead a fulfilled life in the arts. The definition of success couldn’t come from anyone but myself lest I be vulnerable to unending insecurity about what I am producing, why I am doing it, how, and all the other variable minutiae that come with being an artist in this day and age. By the way, I am totally not pretentious or anything, I just studied a lot of vocabulary growing up so your girl has a distinguished lexicon OKK?? 
So I’ve been becoming more concrete and creating my own (reasonable) standards. It goes like this… Alex is a real artist because she: 1. Creates value 2. Creates something out of nothing 
3. Makes people say “ooo” and “ahh” 
4. Exchanges her art for money 
Firstly, I must affirm my position within my particular context in society as an artist. My original purpose is to create value. I exist to satiate the human need for beauty. If I lose sight of the necessity of my position then everything else falls apart. Second, if I for some reason deem the particular arrangement of pixels on my computer screen to be valuable — it just is. Same for any set of brush strokes on a canvas or ordering of clay on an armature and beyond. Regardless of medium, cost, or the acceptance of my methods, simply for the reason that I position myself as an artist, whatsoever I deem as art simply is. Thirdly, I must make my work as widely available to the public for both critique and celebration. For my work to add value it must be experienced. Finally, money is a proxy for power and social standing. If I am able to continually exchange my art for money within a capitalistic context, then I affirm my value not only as an artist but as a participating member of society. #4 Surely deserves its own post but for now I’ll just leave it at that. If you know, you know. These are four very basic principles which I am using to guide my thoughts and behaviors to align them with my ultimate goal of being a “real” artist. And guess what. This has already produced results for me. I was able to create smaller, more manageable goals in service of my guiding principles. For the first time ever, I debuted in a Los Angeles art gallery this January and again in February and March. Also my art has been accepted into a show in NY for April! 
Setting a clear path for myself has slowly revitalized in me that confidence I lost endlessly churning in circles. And I mean countless tough hours where I felt this MUST pay off, just because of the sheer amount of work I’m putting in. But NOPE! There was no rubric for my performance so there was no way to assess its success.  (Access its success?) And so everything good and bad all blended together into a big sad pile of failure. It was impossible gaining any sort of clarity from those muddied waters. It’s possible this new breakthrough is the product of some maturity I’ve developed as I’ve undertaken this whole art thing. So now I feel it upon my heart to say that if you’re an emerging artist, set your own standards and find a way to reward yourself when you meet them. If you’re an established artist, the world needs more people like you so please mentor someone! Until later!
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