#totally made up. no rubric.

[s-k-y-w-a-l-k-e-r]

Ranking Every Taskmaster Contestant*

Just a list I’ve worked on for the last few years in my drafts and never published, because why would anyone bother to do this without write-ups or statistics, without ever being asked to do it in the first place? But, it’s time to just get it out there.

Basically I judged this on: were they fun to watch, did they bring a character to the show I enjoyed, did they seem to enjoy it themselves, or did they seem to care at all? 

I noticed a few patterns. My least favorite seem to be the women who showed up and didn’t really have any familiarity with the show or any interest in competing. Just up from there is a grouping of hapless middle-aged men who I felt weird watching as they failed. 

On the other hand, if they were too competitive, I didn’t appreciate that, either. I feel bad putting Ed Gamble down at #20—I listen to him on two podcasts, but he was way too aggressively competitive in Taskmaster. It’s also part of why Iain Sterling, who otherwise would’ve had a higher spot on the list just by nature of being Scottish, but he really made an ass of himself throughout Series 8. 

Bias is probably the reason my #1 is my #1. A major theme of many of my top favorites seems to be that they are lanky, smart-dumbass types. 

I know there are several people will disagree with me on. Would love to hear what y’all think! 

Anyway, here it is, updated through season 14.

James Acaster 

Jessica Knappett

Liza Tarbuck

Mike Wozniak

Sarah Kendall

Sara Pascoe

Sally Phillips

Morgana Robinson

Rose Matafeo

Noel Fielding 

Bob Mortimer 

Joe Lycett

Joe Thomas

Fern Brady

Nish Kumar 

Sian Gibson

Romesh Ranganathan

Charlotte Richie

Desiree Burch

Ed Gamble

Sophie Duker

Sarah Millican

Aisling Bea

Asim Chaudhry

Lolly Adefope

Phil Wang 

Dara Ó Briain

Mawaan Rizwan

Chris Ramsey

Russell Howard

Bridget Christie

Katy Wix

Jamali Maddix

Rob Beckett

Josh Widdicombe

Munya Chawawa

Kerry Godliman

Doc Brown

Dave Gorman

Ardal O’Hanlon

Alice Levine

Alan Davies

Paul Sinha

Guz Khan

Al Murray

Jon Richardson

Victoria Coren Mitchell

Iain Sterling

Rhod Gilbert

Richard Osman

Frank Skinner

Hugh Dennis

Mark Watson

David Baddiel

Katherine Ryan

Lou Sanders

Richard Herring

Tim Key

Lee Mack

Joe Wilkinson

Paul Chowdhry

Mel Giedroyc

Johnny Vegas

John Kearns

Tim Vine

Catherine Parkinson

Judi Love

Roisin Canaty

Jo Brand

Daisy May Cooper

*Does not include New Year Treats or any international versions. I’ve only watched Taskmaster UK, I swear someday I’ll get to NZ and Australia! (I have tried Finland but it didn’t stick for whatever reason.)

[circeius-invidioso]

What I love about the forgotten legions in 40k is that you can construct some wild theories and there is no one to stop you. Games workshop doesn't care but we do.

But my personal concern is.

The lore says unknown, but I am not satisfied with that response.

So today we will attemp to get inside Malcador's head and answer one of the Imperium's best kept secrets.

The facts we have so far

BUT WAIT.

The plot thickens because if we take it as fact that the geneseed was stolen from another legion we have to guess who is the father?

But fear not we have more evidence as to guess who might be.

1) All of the Grey Knights are sorcerers and pretty powerful ones at that.

2) One of the first hand picked, finger pointed, wholeheartedly selected Grey Knights was a Night Lord.

3) They are smug, walking talking warp magic nukes. They have that wap. Wild ass potential.

Also I am not joking. The Emperor saw that Night Lord and I guess was impressed by his human skin collection and agreed for him to join.

Malcador too. But at this point we all can agree Malcy Malc boy was a thief. Bad choices is his strongest suit.

SO.

👏🏻

Dad Theory No1

THE FATHER MIGHT BE. (empasis on might but it would be really funny if it was the truth)

Same same. But now a different picture. From a better angle.

The Crimson King is their dad.

Yes I am serious.

My limited research leads me to believe Magnus was the one... used for his geneseed by Malcador to create the loyalist version of nucler houdinis.

And you know what would make this theory even funnier if it was true.

Oh yes. Or oh no. Its the same at this point.

If the Grey Knights are indeed just a bunch of Thousand Sons but painted chrome and artificially orphaned.

That bastard Malcador.

He created 1000 sons and did not even have the decency to tell them who their dad was.

1000 men left out in the cold. With no place to call home.

1000 Sons -

1000 SONS PEOPLE THE GREY KNIGHTS ARE 1000 IN TOTAL. THATS THE FINAL CLUE WE NEEDED.

THEY ARE THE SONS OF MAGNUS BUT IN KNIGHT COSPLAY.

THIS IS CANON NOW.

MALCADOR STOLE MAGNUS SEED (THAT SOUNDS WRONG). AND MADE THE GREY KNIGHTS.

AND NOT ONLY THAT RUBRIC HAPPENED AND SINCE THOSE DUDES DON'T KNOW WHO THEIR DAD IS THEY PROBABLY WOKE UP ONE DAY +10 IN ALL THEIR STATS AND COULD NOT EXPLAIN WHY

Case closed

This is canon now

What will games workshop do?

Refute it?

[jaeyunluvbot]

[ 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐬 ] just awful

𝝑𝝔 You sigh heavily as you frantically shove things into your bag, irritated at the short notice Ni-ki had given you about his availability. Your text conversation had been frustrating to say the least, with very few words being exchanged, only enough to agree on a meeting place an time.

You zip your backpack shut and rush out the door, calling out to your parents that you were heading to work on a project, getting no response.

As you exit the house, you take several deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down, not wanting to show up to your meeting flustered and frazzled.

The walk to the library is short, courtesy of your house's location being close to the school. One of the few perks of the private school you attended was that the library stayed open until 2:00 am, a feature you'd taken advantage of several times during your time there.

You reach the library exactly 10 minutes before your agreed upon meeting time, not wanting to make him wait when he was clearly flaky already.

You grab a good spot in a quiet, secluded part of the library and text Ni-ki, letting him know where to find you. You pull out your laptop and begin working in the shared doc you created.

As you work, you realize that way more than 10 minutes have passed, and Ni-ki is nowhere to be found. You begrudgingly pull out your phone and text him, asking where he was.

Eventually, after 40 minutes of working and constantly checking your phone, you hear someone approaching your table. You look up in annoyance and see Ni-ki standing over you.

"You're late," you say, deadpan expression on your face.

He scoffs and tosses his backpack onto the table, plopping down in the chair furthest from you at the table, "You should be glad I even showed up."

You roll your eyes and pull up the rubric, "Ok, well, since I already starting working, I split up the work as evenly as possible. I'll do the research for the first part of the question, and you can research the second part. Put all the info in this doc and I'll format it properly."

You look up from your laptop to see Ni-ki looking bored and totally disengaged, "Listen, this project is huge for our grade and I really need an A, can we just get the work done so we can move on?"

He shrugs and opens his laptop, "The faster I'm done being your partner, the better."

You scoff at his insult but bite your tongue, just wanting to get as much work done as possible.

You're trying to focus on your own part of the research, but keep getting distracted by Ni-ki's messy typing and disorganized sentences appearing below yours.

"Can you at least organize it a little?" You ask pointedly, irritated that he wasn't even trying to make your life a little bit easier.

He snaps his head up to look at you, suddenly looking more irritated than bored, "Listen, I showed up and I'm doing my work, stop being so controlling."

His sudden outburst shocks you a bit, so you just nod and look back down at your computer.

More time passes and you eventually decide that you've done enough work for the day, that, and the fact that Ni-ki's presence was suffocatingly uncomfortable.

"Alright, that's enough for today. We'll need to figure out when we can work on the project again, but we made a good start."

You don't even wait for him to respond before shoving your laptop back into your bag and speed walking out of the library. 𝝑𝝔

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝝑𝝔 yay new chapter woohoo!! i want a real enemies to lovers so ni-ki's gonna be mean at first , sorry guys :(

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬�� 𝝑𝝔 @gweoriz @chenlesfavorite @wonwonpuffs @soobinbunnie5

[lunebits]

ap class tips

for those in ap classes who are struggling. also for those who aren't really. whatever.

just as an intro to my qualifications:

i go to a stem high school (will be graduating next sem!) where all the classes are already advanced as is (our ap classes are also taught differently!) i've taken a total of 10 ap classes during my time, and while that isn't as much as others, i'd say i have a pretty good spread of ap classes i took!

general ap class tips

remember that the ultimate goal for you taking this course is to take the exam and get a 4/5 (reach for that 5!). yes, the grade is important, but that score at the end after that exam might save anywhere from $600-$1200+ in college. so focus your energy on that exam once the exams are encroaching!

make friends in your ap classes. trauma bonding is real (/j) so making friends that will help you study or might save you when you accidentally forgot is key.

and while they all say "study a bit every night!" that's hard to do. the rule of thumb here for every class will be in the categorized sections, so don't worry (i gotchu!!)

ap math (calc ab/bc, stat, physics, chem, etc.)

i personally didn't take physics or chem bc i didn't want to, but i did take bc and got a 5 (yes, i'm so proud)!

rule of thumb for studying at home: do your homework everyday and actually take the time to understand what the hell you're doing. understand what the process is behind solving the problem. be able to pull out the variables. practice, practice, practice. also, this is one of those subjects where it's actually worth it to study it at home everyday.

ANOTHER RULE: practice tests. these math exams are about stamina and speed. if you can solve a problem, great! but now here comes 20 more screaming your name. but, if you can get the timing down before your exam, that's even better. so go waste your saturday afternoon at that mock exam if you need to. another saturday will come in time anyway. ask your teacher for mock exams. get that practice workbook. whatever it takes. get the timing in your hand.

just as a quote from my teacher, "life is about choices, and we are all busy people." don't waste your time doing something that'll waste your time. even if you can't remember it, that's okay. just keep moving and score more points somewhere else. and also, do the easy route. only memorize the easy route.

math is about patterns. patterns rule math. extract that pattern out of that problem, memorize it, and you'll be just fine.

FRQS WILL HURT YOUR BRAIN AND THAT'S OKAY! collegeboard has a very specific way it wants you to answer these questions. the best way to learn the format is to do so many frqs your hands hurt. because in any exam that involves math, you genuinely need to do better on the frqs. they'll land you more points. yes, the mcq might get you that 5, but the frqs become the basic 3 or 4 that you need. your teacher will hopefully teach you the format, but if they don't, the collegeboard ap website has all the past frqs they've ever made.

YOU WILL BE OKAY. I PROMISE. make sure that if you cry, you understand your disappointment then move on to a larger action plan.

ap histories/humanities (art history, u.s history, euro, world, etc.)

i've taken all the histories that my school offers (apush, euro, apwh, apah, etc.)

rule of thumb: don't study at home unless there's a test coming up or you're bad at putting stuff in order.

GET YOUR WRITING SKILLS DOWN PAT. this is the thing that'll get you the most points. that mcq section is a killer, but doing 3-6 (looking at you apah exam) right after might just kill you. so please, get your stamina up. just write. just keep writing.

timeline shit for history. because when it comes down to it, knowing the sequence of events and knowing the events themselves are more important than dates or whatever.

if you're worried about coherency in your writing, jot down a small pre-writing list.

memorize every single rubric. luckily, the dbq/leq rubric is the same across apush, apwh, and euro. you'll get away with just memorizing the two. the apah rubric is a little different, and the ap lit rubric is a little different. just memorize them as best you can.

when writing, cater to your reader. make things easy to spot and easy to grade. they'll give you a higher score if they can clearly see where things are.

just practice mcqs. all the stimulus will have something you can pull out of it (unless it's like apah where you're meant to memorize the works). but every question will have an answer that's in the passage. practice finding that answer. (this one is still really hard)

all these tests are tests of stamina. and sometimes, they're on the same goddamn day because collegeboard hates love us. just keep going. grab a snack. rest your eyes, go.

essays are the bane of everyone’s existence in ap courses because you’re on this strict rubric and have this mythical complexity/sophistication point that you need to give your hopes and dreams of achieving. BUT. but. you’ll be okay. especially for exams like the ap lit/apah exam, you get to come in knowing at least a bit of the exam (for ap lit, a good part of the frq weight. for apah, 90% of the test). TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THAT!! know a novel inside and out. know the works inside and out. you’ll be okay. stretch your hands, breathe, write.

ap sciences (bio, physics, chem, psych, econ)

i've personally taken bio and both econs, but these are all concept based, so the same general tips apply.

rule of thumb: if you don't understand it in class, you need to study it at home asap. seriously. because you sure as hell won’t be able to put it together during class the next day. whats good though is that there’s so many resources online (esp videos!!) for all the ap sciences that it’s actually crazy.

read your textbook. science is great with a textbook in your hand. you don't even need to read the whole thing. just skim through it to add information to your class notes. most times that works.

because the questions are concept based, the mcq/frqs are a little hard to get used to. SO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS: don’t ignore your responsibilities and learn what these questions look like.

flashcards. USE FLASHCARDS. so much of science is not only understanding concepts but applying them. to apply them, you need to know them by heart. and to know them by heart means flashcards to drill yourself.

and speaking of applying your knowledge, you need to take things slowly. approach questions with this framework: 1) read the problem + understand what concept it’s asking about. 2) pull out that information from your sexy brain. 3) solve the problem based on what you can remember. to truly understand, include a lot of examples in your notes. AND MAKE SURE YOU UNDERSTAND WHY AND HOW THEY WORK. the why and the how are more important than the what.

misc tips 🌷

burnout is inevitable if you don’t manage your time correctly. there’s people online that can explain how to manage your energy more than me so please go watch them instead lmfao

try your best to stay on your schedule. the more you push your tasks to this arbitrary tomorrow, the more you absolutely won’t do them.

honey, you need to bring a snack and a water bottle to those exams, you get like a 10 minute break that isn’t enough for the mental taxation (without representation) that happens on those exams. they’re brutal.

the classes themselves are not as bad you think. i promise. most of the time, you’ll actually have fun. and it’s really cool to be learning at a college level. so keep at it! the moment you hate something, the moment you begin to stop trying as hard and your grades start slipping. keep finding the next thing to delude yourself into enjoying (/hj).

[mlobsters]

saw a post yesterday (3 months ago now) that was like finale reactions from not-wincest shippers saying wincest won - but wincest shippers said it wasn't even wincest. which brings me around to my pondering how there's this divide of the ship into wincest / weirdcest / gencest which I'm still not totally sure the difference between the last two. but like, if I'm talking about wincest, I'm not talking about them with fucking required? it's just the dudes in a not-strictly-familial-platonic relationship. which to me, canonically, even in the most literal reading they've got a queerplatonic situation, so that qualifies

i think what i'm boggling over is that (sometimes?) the ship isn't the ship (the key is the key, man) it's like, ship+what they're doing with their dicks.

which led me to reading fanlore's gen and slash and smarm etc articles -> looked for a gencest article, reading the gen sam & dean one and the sam/dean one which is understandably packed with the related shipwar-ish stuff and i'm reminded i just. shouldn't read what anyone has to say about ships and this show. I feel like I'm rarely on the same page as anyone else, which is impressive in a fandom this large. i still don't really understand how the lines between them get drawn. but after all that i read, it sounds like people aren't really in agreement out there on the internet either.

so, this has been in my drafts since december and another post/reply got me to open it back up, someone saying if you want to tag the non-sexual situation it's gencest or weirdcest, not wincest. but I think now my personal understanding/interpretation is that those are just a subset of wincest, not standalone. I think another component of why it gets under my skin too is the inherent devaluation of queerplatonic relationships. a definition borne of the aromatic and asexual communities

and who's to say it isn't romantic? if the lines and beats are romantic, does it stop being so because they're brothers? would we have the same splitting up of the ship if they weren't related? (can guess what my answer would be)

ANYWAY. this was supposed to be how one ship has been split in a way I haven't seen before and find really weird. I can see how say, on tumblr, it's nice to have a tag that's just the qpr relationship, but not to the exclusion of the main ship.

I thought on AO3 it would be more clear cut, but of the 282 tagged with "Gencest | Emotionally Incestuous but Non-Sexual Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester" only 118 are tagged with Dean/Sam. and in the 79 works tagged "Weirdcest | Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester Appear Incestuous to Others Due to Lack of Boundaries", 40 are Dean/Sam.

and while I like the expansion of the tag name to include a definition, what even is emotionally incestuous :p and if there's incest in your definition, how does that not fall under the ship rubric

but being that there's 34,387 works tagged with Dean/Sam, and while there's more things tagged with gencest pre-2020, the majority is 2019+. and weirdcest is nearly exclusively 2021+. so, large consumer of fic that I am, I am sure things that would fall under those labels weren't tagged as such in the main tag.

going back to fanlore, the article about qprs:

Queerplatonic relationship tags are canonized in freeform tags on AO3, but uses in relationship tags are synned to the / tag.[4]

and the reference is:

Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow (Queerplatonic) has been made a synonym of Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow. Works and bookmarks tagged with Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow (Queerplatonic) will show up in Cisco Ramon/Caitlin Snow's filter.

which honestly made me laugh. that's a very specific situation!

but I think a lot of this, for me, circles back to what is a ship even, and why doesn't love for each other above all else+life partners qualify

and yet, look at me the hypocrite, because I tag stuff with "sam and dean" that are the canonical qpr things, but I wouldn't tag wincest because I know a lot of people would have it filtered. whereas anything remotely shippy in xfiles canon, I tag with msr. *facepalm*

and the advice/explanation I've received about tagging other people's posts, canon gifs, what have you; as wincest - that you might be putting their personal squick right in their notifications. so, don't do that! and I've internalized those rules.

and I guess there's plenty of people that watch the show and think they're just regular brothers ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

spn fandom is a minefield even with my skirting at the edges of it.

I don't know what anything means anymore

[yakultii]

omg guys the other day i got a mark back on a uni analytical report thing and it said 70% ??? which to my personal standards (which I honestly don’t apply to anyone else) is basically a fail - I was like does she actually hate me the fuk ? but I was ab to give up on life anyway in that moment so I was gonna leave it and deal w it bc I hadn’t slept for 3 days and was mostly incoherent and in pain but then I was like HOLD UP ik it wasn’t my best work and I knew some areas I would have improved but when looking at the feedback it didn’t match up (bc I always be marking my work against the rubric myself too and i tend to be a harsh marker just in case) and was like what the heck it should at least be 80% + ?? so spent like 3 very slow hours rereading it and analysing it myself against the marking rubric and writing specifically in an email how I did the things she said I didn’t etc and asked insanely politely for a re-mark and she emailed back the biggest (excessive rlly) apology letter telling me in a rlly formal manner it was the worst mistake of her career LMAO and that she must have been doing the rubric for someone else’s and that she remarked and gave it 98% !! so anyway boring story noone cares ab but advocate for urself guys (if u wanna) cos ur probs right !! I was like honestly totally understandable no stress broski like I’ve made much bigger mistakes and I would if I had to mark that many assignments I just wanted more marks for temporary dopamine LMAO and by that I mean literally 0.5 seconds cos even the things that mean something to me mean nothing to me at all yikes anyways literally no one asked but I have no one to tell my stories to these days except y’all :,)

[darkdrin6]

"Shut up"-rubric

So, this is Tanya, right?

Tanya, known for her betrayals of absolutely all her allies.

Tanya, who is true to herself and only to herself.

Tanya, walking over heads to her goal.

Insidious, elegant, exotic Tanya, an example of the Egyptian type of beauty, fierce and fiery, ready for any meanness for the sake of her ideas.

No? Is this Tanya noble and wise? Is she playing the role of Jade now? Just because she's Mileena's girlfriend now. And this is not a question, but a statement. Tanya literally left nothing of her canonical image - the one for which she was loved. She was made just another typical "strong" woman from Netflix, and she is put in the place of a more interesting and more memorable character.

Tanya steals Jade's place in this new game and totally undeservedly. Her only merit is that she has a connection with Princess Mileena. She literally snuck into this game through the bed, guys.

And you know that it is.

[dual-fantasy]

chase fic has the worst timing cause my gen2 obsession is coming back. i love mike in a way nobody else does or understands. he actually kind of sucks a little bit and its not okay but it is justified. they shouldve let him kill scott i think. i want them to kiss. as an experiment. party scike is in the house 2nite. but again in a way nobody else understands. both of them suck just different amounts and i think that makes them compatible in an awful way. they hate each other. there is no romance in their relationship its probably for tax benefits. people want them to kiss i want to watch them fight. three dollars on mike winning. mike understands his mental health but would rather lick a busy sidewalk then ever confess it. scott has no idea whats going on up there but he'd tell anyone as a funny. they are made for each other. jo as well. my queen forever. she was the blueprint. theyre both dog motifs but in awful horrible ways. in the same way actually. i think theyd be great friends but in the worst way. the mutant maggots plus scott mean a lot to me actually. worst team plus scott ever. the most dysfunctional found family. emphasis on dysfunctional. they hate each other and have the worst time ever whenever more then 3 of them are together. Grave Dog. sorry for gen 2 posting i need to rewatch the reboot to like chase more then them again

don't apologise for gen 2 posting you're so real. party scike is in the house tonight. mike means a lot to me too but one of his best qualities is that he's a bitch sometimes. imo he isn't always a nice person but it's completely justified, but that justification doesn't make him a good person. he's at least a little bit of a cunt and ppl seem to make him some perfect and "wholesome" guy because they can't stand that a character has morality deeper than the black and white rubric they have.

scike is real too you're right about them. they shouldn't get a happy ending they need to be violent. they shouldn't kiss they should clean their blood off eachothers hands after they fight. they aren't in a good relationship it's bad and tragic but it's everything. they're also funny as shit. they're both just going through shit and shenanigans. very funny but also they're the actual worst. scike is awesome

jo was the best too. to be honest I didn't like her but on a rewatch she was literally the realest character. she's an icon shes the moment she's incredible

the mutant maggots were one of the best teams in total drama. on tier with team Amazon and team skunk butt. easily one of the top 5 at the very least. theyre never having a good time literally ever they literally all hate eachother so so much and also they're sooo sweet and mean everything.

again dw about gen 2 posting they're so good

[absolute-immunities]

It is not unusual for nations recovering from wars to incentivize their populations to raise their birthrates. The post-World War II Soviet pronatalism campaign attempted this on an unprecedented scale, aiming to replace a lost population of 27 million. Why, then, did the USSR re-legalize abortion in 1955?

Mie Nakachi uses previously hidden archival data to reveal that decisions made by Stalin and Khruschev under the rubric of 'family law' created a society of broken marriages, “fatherless” children, and abortions, each totaling in the tens of millions. The government reversed laws regarding paternal responsibility, thereby encouraging men to impregnate unmarried women and widows, and blocked available contraception, overriding the advice of the medical establishment. Some 8.7 million out-of-wedlock children were born between 1945 and 1955 alone. In the absence of serious commitment to supporting Soviet women who worked full-time, the policy did extensive damage to gender relations and the welfare of women and children. Women, famous cultural figures, and Soviet professionals initiated a movement to improve women's reproductive health and make all children equal. Because Soviet leaders did not allow any major reform, an abortion culture grew among Soviet women and spread throughout the Soviet sphere, including Eastern Europe and China.

Based on groundbreaking research, Replacing the Dead traces how the idea of women's right to an abortion emerged from an authoritarian society decades before it did in the West and why it remains the dominant method of birth control in present-day Russia.

the Soviet Union was kinda messed up imo

[crimsonblackrose]

.

They have a pumpkin lantern!

Miguel what is your room decorations? A skull...a monster (looks kinda AoT but idk) I kinda expected more spiderman for a guy whose grandma is supposed to be making him a spiderman costume.

Seriously, Miggy what is alll of this? It's like horror art.

I also don't know who this dude is that's on his wall multiple times. also the one wall of spooky horror looking art with the other wall of cutesy art is a mood. But also...I don't know any of these references. 😂

I forgot his first choice for costume was deadpool. I wonder if they didn't put any of those characters he wanted up in his room due to copyright. Since this is pre-netflix money and I assume most of it went to music rights. But again, I might just be missing the references to all these things.

"Miggy what happened to your hand? Uhhh.... You don't want to know." His grandma thinks he injured himself jerking off. 😂

So he's behind on a bunch of bills $430 for a late loan payment, he's made 20 payments but still owes 40 and is behind by like what looks like 2 months.

He owes $45.84 for power via Southern Power Source

My question related to the bills is...didn't he use Sid's check? How little did Sid give him? Or I suppose the other question is where did that money go?

omg I just noticed the LaRusso stairs. Those tiles are so cool!

Looks like someone drives Jeep Rubric...Kyler maybe? Did Kyler show up first thing? It's not like they're neighbors? Why's he out of the car? Are they driving together or seperate?

Amanda: "outside of wasting a few bucks of tuna he seemed harmless"

AMANDA THAT WAS NOT CHEAP TUNA. That was ridiculously expensive tuna that was wasted. TORO is not cheap.

I mean it's not that Daniel's gotta trust Johnny over Sam, it's that neither Sam doesn't know Kyler's awful (at the moment) and Daniel's met the guy once. There's more nuance to the situation. Plus technically Sam's 'fallen in with the wrong crowd'. She's throwing parties at your house without permission and not cleaning up after them. She's getting into car accidents and not telling anyone about it. She's not hanging out with her old friends. Like it's interesting how most shows put the push on "be friends with people who care about you" but Amanda and Daniel are like "so she wants to be popular" that's a great choice who cares what the people she hangs out with are like. Which do they even know these knew friends of hers?

Louie's movie recommendation: Jungle Fever

West Valley High School home of the Mountain Lions: "can't hide our lion pride" "Keep calm and roar on"

Demetri would rather play a game then get hit in the face...proceeds to get hit in the face later by Kreese.

2 things: 1 the vape city is new. And 2 that is a completely different address. Isn't that where Tom Cole's shop is?

Johnny's out here taping his signs up on palm trees near the Encino Commons and the first guy he tries to offer karate classes to is like a grandpa. Also, despite his protests on teaching women, he totally tries to give a flyer to a woman jogging past.

Sam has her own en suite bathroom. Which means she and Anthony don't fight over their bathrooms. Lucky, but also disappointing for sibling fighting.

I think the closest we get to TKK Daniel rambling yet is Amanda catching him snooping on Sam's laptop. Goes from wifi issues to making broccoli rabe to wondering if shark tank is on tonight. 😂

Miguel's backpack is also a Dodgers backpack. Yet nothing Dodgers related in his room.

New music mention: Ratt

The school has a swimming pool. Is this the same school that Johnny and Daniel went to or is it new? Does that mean they had swimming gym classes? Daniel did have access to a pool? Or is it a different school or possibly an addition?

"I thought you new this guy." "Of course not I lied." and Miguel's "awwww." like he's exhausted, disappointed but also not surprised.

What is that?!

Do you think Johnny did Miguel's make up for the skeleton?

I get that a. it's a piece of jewelry and b. it's like innocent but not actually innocent because of Kyler but also Daniel is a chaperone and his job is to keep the kids out of the classrooms...and at the dance...so...he's doing his job.

Kyler lying causes so many issues because everyone believes him. 😂

What sort of teen drama fake app is a 'new video alert'? Like does Yasmine just have everyone's phone number in the entire school???

...Miguel there's no zipper there. The zipper is in the back...how did you? Were you just miming going to the bathroom? Why? So your friends wouldn't feel lonely because you didn't have to go to the bathroom? Also does this mean Johnny and all the cobras had to treat those things like rompers?

So is Kyler captain hook and his friend is smee?

Why would the bathrooms also be the locker rooms that students can lock themselves into???? That seems super unsafe.

I guess if there's a photo of Ali then it must be the same school, but they must've changed their school colors from green and white.

[salty-professor]

Degree Mills

The Department of Education defines a degree mill as a school that has fake accreditation and where the students do not have to do any work. That is certainly true.

However, insiders, that is me, and a lot of other folks who do the work in higher ed agree that a degree mill is a place where the fix is in from the moment the student walks on campus. They find it sick to know that regardless of performance, as long as the student has a pulse and is in good standing with one or twenty student loan services (this is the real key, students=$$$), that student will graduate with a legitimate degree even though the student will not have learned a fucking thing.

It is gross. I hate it. Blech.

I have a confession to make…

I accidentally got a job at a degree mill. I didn't mean to. I was looking to pick up some summer teaching. Teaching full-time doesn't pay all the bills and sometimes, we get sick of teaching the same few classes over and over, so, while we don't want to leave our full-time teaching posts, we pick up adjunct jobs at other schools.

So, I saw this ad for an adjunct job at a BIG school. This is one of those schools that is so big that it will survive the coming edpocalypse without so much as a blink. When the small, liberal arts schools fail, and shut down these mammoth, too-big-to-fail schools will roll on until there is just one monster Hydra University. It is an online job so I didn't have to commute. It pays better than what I would make doing overload work at my current job. Most importantly for me, the school is a non-profit and accredited, so I wasn't going to be doing garbage…or so I thought. I did my training and was impressed. I mean, they use an online learning management system designed by sadists. Still, it wasn't the end of the world. I've used it before. It isn't my full-time job. I could suffer for a few hours per day of this bullshit. No problem. I signed the contract. I read the text. I whistled a merry tune.

Then, I saw the course shell.

I have zero ability to change anything. I can't alter the due dates to meet my schedule. I can't close the discussions after they are graded. I can't even change the late policy. OK. So, I guess this is all about quality control. They need to be sure folks are doing it "right" so OK. I can give good, thoughtful feedback and do some teaching on the back end. Individualized learning is awesome anyway. Then, I saw the rubrics. They are already filled out with approved written feedback and they only have three levels. The student either gets all the points, most of the points, or NONE of the points. Really? Really? Who would EVER give a student a zero unless there was a missing assignment? No one who isn't a total fuckhead, that's who. I am not, for the record, a total fuckhead.

Thus, even when my students totally miss the point, like swing and miss, I have to mark that middle row on the grading rubric. That means, as long as the student turns in something, even if it is crappy and has a grammar error in every sentence, the student will earn a C. The school is accredited because every week the faculty clicks the pre-made rubric and thus the students get regular, substantive feedback. Also, as long as they submit something, the students will pass. The retention and graduation rates put me through the roof. Student satisfaction must be sky high because when asked if they like the place and if they feel the teacher was engaged, students will say yes. After all, how could they not?

I can't change the system. It is a massive school with lots of lawyers and I assume, one or twenty lobbyists as well. For now, I am taking detailed notes. I have videos and screenshots. I am building a file that I will send to the DOE and the regional accrediting body. They will likely not give a shit, but I give a shit and it is all I can do. I am not going to walk away from the students I currently have. I can't quit on them. That isn't fair. They can still learn some good stuff. I will fight the good fight within the virtual confines of my classroom. I will give different feedback. I will push them to do better. I will make audio comments or video comments and I meet with them and I try, and try, and try, to get them to learn. To be better. I will explain that while they are going to pass, that isn't the point. Grades are pointless if they don't learn anything.

I know there will be students who care. I know there is some great information they can take from my class. I can do the work. The extra work. I can be the shining light in the degree-milled darkness. I will work hard because I care.

#educationisaright, but it must be earned.

I need to take a shower.

[weezerblue]

mine, all mine

chapter one: soon-to-be girlfriend

series description: he needs you, so he'll have you

WARNINGS FOR ENTIRE SERIES (read warnings prior to reading part 2): marking, daddy kink, petnames (sweet girl, baby, darling, angel, good girl, sweetheart, honey), petplay kind of, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, stalking, murder (not to reader dw), self indulgent, stockholm syndrome, slow burn (is it considered slow burn if you stalk them, become friends with them then kidnap them??? question of the day)

steve didn't know a lot of things in life, but one thing he knew for certain was that you were meant for him. he was gonna have you whether you like it or not. he didn't care. it was honestly just something he accepted and was ready for you to accept. if someone ever asked him what he pictures himself doing in 5-10 years, he'll either say you, married to you, or raising your kids.

he would never admit this, for fear of sounding like the stalker he is or even worse, a total edgelord. but it was always in the back of his mind whenever he saw you with someone else, his mind is overcome with jealousy.

"steve?" the teacher had assigned you to be his partner for the end of the year. you only really knew his name from how popular he was and how some of your friends were friends with him. you honestly tried to steer clear of him majority of the time.

"y/n?" he had his head down before, not paying attention to whatever this class was about.

"i never told you my name?" you question. he laughs, 'how naive of her' he thinks to himself as he looks away from you, obviously he knows your first, middle, and last name because he has a laminated copy of your schedule from your first year at hawkins high.

your last name was unnecessary to him though, 'might as well just say harrington' that was his thought process. he'd thought about your marriage before, estimated your ring size, pictured you in a white dress, looked at venues, and imagines your "first night" as a married couple regularly. he doesn't listen to most of what you say about the project, just the part about you coming to his house after school is enough for him.

he didn't drive you home, on account of you insisting you would get there by yourself and him also not wanting to scare you away.

when you made it to his house, he was patiently waiting on the couch, watching whatever was on.

you sit down beside him, waiting for him to speak first. shockingly enough, he didn't at all. in fact, he seemed to be admiring you from where he sat??

sighing and regretting your decision already, you hand him the rubric for the assignment.

"what's this?" asks steve, stupidly.

you don't answer, waiting for him to at least try to read it.

"c'mon, you really wanna do this boring project today? why can't it wait till tomorrow?"

"it's friday, steve"

"oh well that's okay, you can come over if you want" you still didn't know him that well yet and didn't want to spend more time there than you had to.

"um- i guess?" you awkwardly say, trying to not look at him.

"it's cause we don't know each other right? well that's okay, cause i know you pretty well" you raise your eyebrows and your eyes widen, picking up on all his creepy behaviors up until this point.

"not in that way, just like, i've heard you talk to your friends and our lunch tables are close to each other so....." he doesn't wanna raise any suspicion yet, just wants you to be his cute little unaware almost-girlfriend that he could shelter and manipulate into not thinking any of his behaviors are weird.

"oh, okay well tell me about yourself" you don't know what, but something makes you slightly attracted to him, despite thinking he's a stalker, and despite him being one.

you two spend the next 3 hours together, just laughing and talking like you'd been friends forever. you started to feel safe with him.

you were unknowingly digging yourself into a hole, every giggle, every little inside joke you made with him, it all just solidified in his mind, this was how it'd be. this was all he'd ever wanted. and he knew you had to want it too.

"oh stevie, it's late i have to go home now" stevie, the nickname you'd given him about an hour in. it just made him more obsessed with you.

"i don't think you should go, it's dark and cold out there" he insinuated to you possibly staying over his house.

"well i could call-"

"you could just stay in the guest room upstairs"

you gasped. he really trusted you that much to let you stay in his house? you didn't consider it creepy at all, and steve was really grateful for that.

you let him lead you all the way past the guest room, to his room.

"where we goin' stevie?"

"my room, duh" he laughs

"but i thought you said guest room"

"no i definitely said my room, baby"

him calling you that was kind of just natural now, he basically considered you his girlfriend who doesn't know you're dating him

you sit down on the carpet in front of his bed, expecting him to throw you a blanket, maybe some pillows.

"come on" he motions for you to lay beside him. it was too late and you were much too tired to deny him.

"i'm doing this because i'm cold, okay?" he nodded and went to shift the blanket more towards your side.

you snuggle up into him, letting his arms wrap around your waist as you face him. this surprised him, but he'd never really been this close to you. he began to regret asking you to sleep in his room because now that he thought about it, having an extremely pretty girl that barely knew him in his bed was pretty awkward.

you fall asleep almost immediately. steve tries to reposition you so that his boner isn't pressing against your thighs. you groan, moving back to your original spot.

you don't seem to notice in your sleep, making no effort to get more comfortable.

while you were asleep, he whispered to you, things about how someday you'll be his and his only, silently hoping you either wouldn't be grossed out or wouldn't hear.

he kisses your forehead, patting your head and holding you impossibly close to him.

after a while he falls asleep too, thinking about how easy it would be to have you to himself at this point.

𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒏𝒅♡︎♥︎

[anouri]

days 10, 11, & 12/100 of me trying have been me struggling to manage my workload for both lab and TAing i’m tired

made questions & rubric for the students’ final assessment

took care of my cells without needing to reference protocol (finally)

made powerpoint slides & class materials

reviewed other TAs’ quiz questions

reviewed regrade requests

i wrote the tiniest amount across the past few days, didn’t keep track but maybe 500 words (?) total

also i’ve been doing a relatively good job at not succumbing to bedtime procrastination which usually gets pretty severe when i’m busy at work. which also means i’m less sleep deprived so my sleep schedule has been more consistent (when my insomnia decides to not act up)

i still need to grade this week’s quizzes and (most likely) start a new protocol in lab either today or tomorrow (if the proper materials have shipped in time 😵‍💫) and make another set of quiz questions for their quiz after thanksgiving (😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫) and enter all their participation grades from last week (😵‍💫) so yeah can’t wait until saturday / i finish all that so i’m free (for like a day)

[doublewritten]

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[hospitalterrorizer]

diary213

4/15-16/2024

monday - tuesday

my shift got put later, tomorrow, and it's still only 3 hours.

so i guess that's good. the people who manage schedules at work honestly seem so lost and it is so fucking annoying, one of my days off is just gone now, replaced with another meaningless shift to waste more of my meaningless life.

my gf did make today a lot better, she got me a cake, she got me chicken katsu curry, it was all good, then she sort of upset me bringing something up i don't like her talking about, something that happened at work that is funny but makes me basically dysphoric and i don't like hearing it talked about at minimum but it's not like she is really thinking she just wants to tell her brother a funny story it's like okay but i just felt bothered by it. i don't want to reproduce it here but i guess the gist is that a kid kept saying i look like timothy chalamet and whatever. it makes me feel not good thinking about it but what am i supposed to do. i guess a lot of people might agree. my gf's brother did, which made it worse. now she feels guilty, i don't know what to do about that. i just feel bad, it doesn't matter though, i told her it doesn't matter and it's fine and she shouldn't care how i feel. she just wanted to tell her brother something funny.

today at work, since it is a birthday place, a bunch of kids came in, and stuff, and it was their birthdays and i felt how totally and viscerally meaningless mine has been made surrounded by them, this is stupid and dramatic i guess and it's not even my birthday anymore so i can't even justify crying about it but i just felt so unhappy about the fact that i am like being used up like some kind of coal or whatever to fuel like, this very shallow joy offered to children, sit and spin on a ride, sit in cars and bump into eachother, gamble to win plastic shit that will be the only token that enables any memory of this place at all, there will be no stories, there will be nothing, a perfectly carried out rubric of events in an order you choose maybe but really are guided by architecture, a super-nothing, there is no memory possible of the place beyond some kind of vague location-based nostalgia for interiors and cheap design. do any of us remember distinct things that happen in chuck-e-cheese, or anything similar? i think only bad things and the rare few good things have more to do with people and proximity making it not be the place it is meant to be. all memory of places like this necessitates rupture. i am put to work to prevent rupture.

anyway i know i'm being like a baby or whatever. i shouldn't care. i shouldn't care, it's stupid to be so upset, it's so stupid though, i feel like extra upset because of it not even being my birthday anymore so it's like i can't even be really upset on my own birthday when anyone would be like okay with it. like i just have to get on with it, my time is on a conveyor belt i have no control i am deposited back into my life right as the day is ending, i get home late, i enjoy like an hour and a half of 'birthday' and then nothing. same same same same same same same after that and my gf will be nice to me but she can only take so much of me being annoying.

and i just feel hideous .

but not too much longer, not too much longer it'll be through, this job. i hope.

i just keep thinking about how i don't ever really know what i want. i at least tried to do things i know i wanted to do today, i had figured things i want to do outside that aren't just vague nothings, i always need other people to direct me. i wanted to go to a thrift store, i wanted to go to a restaurant, i wanted to go home. the one day i at least imagined was just impossible, it's just super impossible and pointless to want to do things, from where i am at least. i am just so used to having others decide for me, i just let my job decide what my time actually means. #lol.

but this is all stupid and so embarrassing, i really shouldn't even be able to think like this, but i am. isn't that horrible. it probably means i have some kind of personality disorder and should be executed or something.

unexpectedly, music is going okay i think, though. that is very nice i think. i figured out part of what is wrong with this one song is just the imbalance in the channels, i need to double the guitars, and then have the synths kinda sit over top, maybe put them back in the middle, that might be cool. it definitely makes the guitars sound a lot better to be doubled and panned like they are now.

am i just some kind of resentful little worm? i don't want to be. i want to be kind, and i want to be without ressentiment. i want to be better than this, but i just fall into this kind of thing, it's like giving up but worse, it feels so venomous and hostile, like it's just me turning into a cancer along my self, a terminal negativism.

i will probably have to make peace with working this song out better tomorrow but it's definitely a lot closer to what i want, i think, or hope. but i'm sure i can learn to be disappointed tomorrow and stuff all over again and over again and over again.

but i think it is close, honest, or this is at least the way to do things, and maybe some stuff needs to change in the song otherwise, like maybe make the low end of the kicks less loud or round? that seems like a good idea, other stuff along that path, maybe just by a tiny bit cutting more lows from the guitars? probably also a good idea. i think these are things to move forward w/ for this song, maybe also look into the unity gain thing i have going on and see what i can do to make that a little less punishing feeling.

anyway, i need to sleep,

and i do always feel less crazy after sleeping and tomorrow's a short shift, so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[tjswritingstuff]

One of my professors opened their course a couple days early. I have already read all the things and watched all the videos they have up.

I also checked the grade book, because even though future assignments are not posted, they are in the grade book. I can see what the assignments are going to be if not any details yet.

Here’s my concern. Each journal entry is worth 2pts but only 7 will count toward the grade, so (14pts) total. The midterm is worth 20, and the final is worth 20, but the critical essay is worth 40pts. Total available points not counting the Essay is worth 54pts. I better rock that essay!

I can get full points on everything in that course, but the essay will be the thing that really determines my grade at the end of the semester is.  I guess it’s a good thing I’m confident in my ability to write.

I enjoy knowing this information. I like it when there’s a rubric that shows exactly how the points are allotted. It tells me where to focus my efforts.  

I can’t put the assignments into my planner yet because I don’t have solid due dates, but it looks like the journal entries are going to be due each Sunday by Midnight. So, 14 weeks, 14 entries, each already has a name, which also tells me in what order each novel will be assigned.

I might be a little excited! I might have made a happy squeal sound when I got the notification on my phone that one of my courses was now available.