#too self aware
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tooselfaware · 3 months ago
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Ever since I heard "Safe and Sound" in the end credits of The Hunger Games movie (I was like 14 or 15 back then), it randomly plays in my mind during emotional scenes while I'm reading.
It's like my brain makes an AMV with it and makes me feel more, sometimes too much.
And now I'm an adult swinging from "numb" to "breakdown because too much feelings" and it sends me to breakdown mode so fast. Why did my brain train my body to react this way? I'm already not okay. Stop making me more not okay!
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akcartoonist2004 · 9 months ago
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I keep on having these thoughts about stuff I’m becoming too self-aware and questioning a lot.. so I just went in ahead to draw this as a Vent…
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enha-stars · 7 months ago
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caffeine caffeine caffeine caffeine caffeine caffeine about to buy some caffeine gum
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my-autism-adhd-blog · 8 months ago
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Why self-diagnosed autistics are valid
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medical diagnosis can be expensive
humans are the experts on their own minds
family may prevent assessment
diagnosis criteria is a poor checklist of stereotypes
diagnosis criteria ignores gender, race, sexuality, culture & more
medical diagnosis confirms autism, but doesn't create it
discrimination within the medical profession may prevent diagnosis.
Assessment waiting lists often long
medical trauma may make assessment unfeasible
Neurodiverse Journeys
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karda · 4 months ago
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is it the stillness that makes you shake?
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ladysomething · 2 months ago
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Lewis can’t even say Nico’s name, meanwhile Nico is apparently EDITING THIS VIDEO HIMSELF?!
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mellowwillowy · 5 months ago
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Imagine in a self-aware AU, the TWST boys telling their family that they're gonna bring a friend home and it turns out to be a fucking god, lol."
Riddle's mom either had a low or high expectation about the friend Riddle might bring home and Archon, she almost passed out the moment she saw the aura you emit unconsciously. Brightening and blinding! She tried to make a good impression and win your heart the whole time, Riddle had never seen her mom that nervous before to be honest.
Dylla's jaw fell on the floor when Deuce introduced you to her excitedly. Not only had his son changed for the better, he also managed to friend the God? What had happened during his first year of high school? She was nervous at first but soon relaxed when she knew you were a rather friendly soul even to your friend's Mother. Dylla was the type of mom to embarrass his son so expect some funny remarks of Deuce.
Leona's family had never been more surprised in an elated way than this. Their very troublesome son came back with the God next to him. And most of all, the God praised their son for being good?
Azul's grandmother was straight-up fascinated by you. The God radiated such a brilliant aura even when in the dark bottom of the sea. His parents were very elated to see Azul bringing his friend home for the first time (not the Leech brothers) and by God, they did not expect it to be the God. Azul was rather nervous when he introduced you to them, something you didn't see so often.
The Leech's father was amazed. How did his sons manage to convince the God to come home with them? There's no way they used those tricks he used to drag people right? Judging by how relaxed you looked, he could say for sure you were not a prisoner to them and the Leech's family.
Kalim's parents immediately threw a grand banquet and a thanksgiving the moment Kalim showed you to them. His siblings were beyond ecstatic and amazed seeing someone who could glow like the God!
Jamil's parents almost died from a heart attack while Najma was squealing for some reason.
Vil's father was surprised. He had never seen his son being so insistent in introducing his friend to him. He thought nothing much of it, just a fellow celebrity or actor, and definitely not a God.
Rook's family was... oddly unbudged. Of course, they were pleasantly surprised but it was as if they had expected it even though Rook didn't tell them anything. Did they know early on or were they just always ready for anything? One thing for sure was that blood runs thicker than water.
Idia's mother couldn't stop coddling all over you and was more of the friend here than Idia himself. Ortho had a hard time trying to separate you two just so that the brothers could have your attention again. The father on the other hand swallowed his heart out of shock.
Malleus' grandmother could feel your aura from miles away before you were brought to her. Instead of the usual curtsy she received, this time it was her who curtsied and it made you panic instantly. Lilia was there to ease you down and managed to tease her for it. He soon received an earful of him being so impolite to you and her at the same time. (Malleus dared not to step in)
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chamerionwrites · 2 years ago
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Possibly The most surprising thing I have discovered on the internet is the number of people who will unironically refer to others as "degenerates" without expecting anyone reading this to immediately assume that they are a straight-up fascist
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somewhereincairparavel · 8 days ago
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'i hate jason grace because he thought he was worthy enough to compete with percy' I'm sorry have y'all SEEN jason. this man defeated a TITAN without weapons and his bare hands to the point the titan wanted to rise from the UNDERWORLD with the help of a GODDESS to seek vengeance over him. I think we can cut him slack for having some well deserved self respect bc I'd brag too wtf
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monteruu · 1 month ago
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had enough of this guy
[image id: digital illustration in mspaint of benrey from half life vr but the ai is self aware. he is wearing his uniform crouched on the ground and hunched over looking off towards the side with his teeth bared. a green star-burst shape is behind him on a black background. "BENRYBENRYBENRY" in red text from his name tag can be seen and continues off the page. end image id.]
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inkzectz · 2 months ago
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Bésame con tus ojos de miel, que me hablan de un mundo que ya no conozco
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dammixxed · 3 months ago
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I prob won't have time to finish this since school starting eugh
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thatdeadaquarius · 9 months ago
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College be kicking my ass but we continue on like Scaramouche (alive and kicking, but still crabby about it all lmfao)
Random idea but what happens when the acolytes got hold of Creator that is able to squeeze into small places (like a cat would but less liquid) and knows how to escape? Think of sagau but instead of all the deaths, its just they got overexited and chased the Creator the moment they see them which scared them shitless seeing a mob just appear out of nowhere.
I mean who wouldn't after seeing your favourite person in your favourite game just appear right in front of you? (I apologize in advance to the poor unfortunate sucker)
Imagine a world-wide search that keeps getting them heart attacks. Venti just flying by with Dvalin ony to see you on top of the floating pillar above Dragonspine LEANING PRECARIOUSLY OH MY ARCHONS GET AWAY FROM THE EDGE---
Zhongli walking around trying to find peace and quiet only to sense your presence which led him towards Azhdaha's domain and nearly shouted in terror seeing you hanging by one of the limestones above the slumbering dragon your grace what and how the in the fucking name of teyvat did you---
Yae Miko screaming in surprise seeing you inside one of the cupboards of your grace's house (you made a small temporary one in each country in case u need more rest) that she and Ei found in one of the remote islands.
Nahida and the entire Forest Rangers having one of the most intense, frustrating and most challenging game of hide and seek in the entire freaking forest.
You hiding underneath the sand like a fricking snake everytime Cyno spots you from a disrance.
-Vine Boom 🧨
I am no longer apologizing for lateness simply bc atp its basically assumed Im terribly sorry 💀 /so gen
  
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Content under -----------------✄
Sun: Reader, (you/they/them)
Orbit: Headcanons-ish, Imposter SAGAU? Imposter SAGAU Reversed Ver? unclear (NOT DARK)
Stars: little here, little there
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: reader/you thinks everyone is hunting them down, dark sagau fake-baiting lmao, & Trigger Warnings: none known.
Please comment if I missed any. /gen
No but the traumatic experience of you cautiously wandering into Mondstadt after realizing ur in Genshin like, ✨👄✨
and every single street/alleyway you try to go down to even avoid it is just people all looking at you like: 👁️👄👁️ ???
and ur over here equally just like: 😃 tf u lookin at????
u get up near the cathedral and finally see a playable character, Barbara, and she just fully GASPS and POINTS at you like she’s getting paid to be an actor for this
shouting sm nonsense like: “My Creator??? King of All???? IS THAT YOU?????”
and after which a few nuns check the commotion, Rosaria and Barbara’s Visions are glowing, and all join in heckling you
Venti coming (literally) flying around a corner on a breeze, saying he was trying to catch up to you, and ohhh now ur Convinced:
None of these bitches must be happy to see you, you did forcefully control their bodies if by the sounds of it they knew you/they must’ve been aware during the game, aw damn looks like u gotta run for your life now
You just book it out of Mond, Venti/Barbara yelling after you to come back, and meanwhile you’re leaving a shell-shocked Jean/Diluc/Kaeya (with Visions glowing) in ur wake on the way out
Not one being, mortal or otherwise, convinces you to stay in Mond, and you finally get to Dragonspine- the only place u know they wont follow
(well maybe the pyro characters but ur betting if u can make it up the mountain theyre not committed to,, running you down? arresting you?? ur not sure)
u make it all the way up and luckily everythings all solved like u did in the game, the traveler must be well into teyvat by now, and u decide to say “for the already achieved achievement” and fuck around and find out near the nail
U thought as u finally got on it u heard a scream somewhere in the sky, and u spotted Dvalin carrying Venti/Barbatos, and once again book it out of town (damn u cant believe theyre so committed they got the dragon in on it…)
so u haul ass all the way down the mountain, traveling only at night, living like a vampire, holing up during the day when u see Mond citizens/knights/gods/etc. walking around presumably looking for you
but u make it, finally! sweet, sweet Liyue, ur 2nd home (besides Mondstadt)
Only to immediately, like right outside the fucking gates to Liyue Harbor, run into Zhongli.
and he’s standing there like this mf knew u were coming, and the first thing out his mouth is some BS like, “…Darnell, that you??”/ref LMAOO
but instead of laughing abt it u just scream and run for your life haha
oh jesus h christ- he’s sending the adepti after you fuck- how hated are you??
sure u maybe hate Celestia a little, and sympathize with the traveler, but this seems a little extreme?!
you go to the one place u know he/any other adeptus doesnt like to come often, Azdaha’s cave
and after a night (well, day bc ur sleeping during the day now) of Azdaha sleeping peacefully, he wakes up fully coherent and u actaully have a rlly pleasant conversation with him about Liyue food lol
he also kept mentioning some kind of god? but like in reference to you?? are u connected to them, u kinda know a lot of gods atp so ur not sure which he means, a god to rule them all??? Celestia?? yeah u guess u know those fucks-
Cue u looking down from ur perch in the stalagmites above, u found a ledge and Azdaha helped you,
only to see a very concerned and borderline nervous Zhongli down below, Azhdaha just greets him like nothing’s wrong, but as soon as he sees you’re uncomfortable, helps you escape (more like teleport) away
(the old geo archon was probably nervous just be around Azhdaha u assume)
and now ur on the islands of Inazuma
u know exactly what islands are all but abandoned, the ghost one, the electrocuting one, and the scary bird one, all great options 👍
Raiden and Yae Miko manage to find you on every single one, with Yae getting more and more exasperated, and Ei getting more and more concerened with every position they find you in
hanging out on the banks of the electro river that would kill you if it weren’t for the little electro trees fending it off (thank fuck u maxed that shit out while in game)
bc u assumed they’d hate to be around it, plus lots of ronin- nope Ei is almost… scolding you?? oh but she’s got her Musou no Hitotachi out fuCK-
(she was slaying ronins that were getting too close to you)
she also is constantly jumpscaring you on tsurumi island/ghost island bc while the ghosts are gone, the creepy atmosphere isn't, and it makes her all the more terrifying as The Raiden Shogun comes walking out of the fog into the cave you've hidden in, stuff of ur nightmares for weeks as u just bird box style try to be silent and stealth around the island to get to an abandoned boat,
literally her scary ass purple sword glowing silhouette wandering around in the fog as you paddle away 💀
getting to thunder bird island and Yae Miko is literally both running/teleporting as quickly as she can to you, as you jump from floating rock to floating rock to escape her, god its so unnerving to watch someone so lazy running after you
she keeps getting in this weird “praising the heavens pose” sometimes when you jump, oh shit she’s aiming hER ATTACKS AT YOU THATS WHY-
oh good- she missed and deflected some stray debris coming ur way, u gotta get to the bird area and see if you can glide away (u managed to get a glider at some point thank fuck)
the bird is luckily on ur side against all these mfs trying to hunt u down (for controlling their bodies u guess) and flies u back to mainland teyvat
sumeru u thought would have the most mercy on u tbh, maybe fontaine bc Neuvillette only rlly cares if u break “fontaine” laws, maybe he wouldn't care to chase down a mortal like u over this
and nahida bc shes just nice
which is somewhat true, as you are acting like tarzan swinging around on vines and shit to escape the forest rangers
but she does show up in ur dreams, but shes just all foggy or distorted, u guess bc ur not of this world or smth??
and so it just unnerves u more, and u try to make it out to the desert, where at least there's no gods to worry about
mf ur hunkered down in a pyramid and see the shadowy shape of Cyno walking thru a sandstorm at you 💀
U dont kno how u got out of that one tbh, smth abt “king deshret made a plan for this” and left it behind for ppl to use to escape underground, sweet
And while Nahida and other eremites, scholars like Alhaitham/Kaveh/Dehya were looking around the desert sands, u slip by them
And u make it to the oasis at the edge of the desert, and steal an old rowboat to cross to fontaine (if i had a nickel everytime u needed to escape a god via old rowboat, youd have 2 nickels- )
and getting to Fontaine is not much better.
U literally get to the clockwork tower, foggy, ominous, uninhabited except for treasure-seekers occasionally, its perfect
until Neuvillette himself just strolls in abt 3 nights of u making camp there
u nearly shit urself as he just fake-knocked on a wall, meanwhile ur like hanging from the ceiling (four limbs out suspending you type of fictional shit)
luckily, mostly bc u were trying to wait him out (which wasn't possible ur limbs hurt so bad) he was, finally, the first person around u long enough to be genuinely kind and patient and answer questions
(Neuvillette acc couldn't figure out where u were at first, and was very confused how u got ur voice to boom around this chamber of the tower, after a minute of talking u trusted him enough to tell him to look up lol)
just in time too, he was able to hide u from the archons a little longer bc u were nervous
(u were already intimidated enough by Neuvillette being irl himself, talking to you, let alone all the other gods/vision users, as u realized afterwards thinking abt all the ppl trying to “hunt u down”, that if they all counted as ppl actually wanting to see you, that was a rlly overwhelming amount, esp if their first instinct is to run at you??? what are you, a fan-abused/disrespected kpop idol????)
trying to be fancy and schedule posts once i get enough free time to actually wrangle my adhd to actually partake in my favorite hobbies 💀
well as long as I'm not getting slammed with lots of shifts again
hope u guys had a great weekend and have a good week! Happy late Valentine’s Day :)
Safe Travels Vine Boom,
💀♒
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twinsyy · 6 months ago
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one of my most favourite things in sagau is the special connection the traveler has with the player (or creator)
i absorbed the idea that the traveller would be scared about the whole controlling their body and they cant do anything to prevent it thing the first time it happens
the first time it happens is, of course, after your game first loaded teyvat. when your hold over their world was first established
that beach, the beginning of your journey. and the first time traveller had felt completely powerless against a higher and unknown being as a traveller of worlds
paimon feels robotic. it’s like she is following a script, her movements calculated and unnaturally stiff
‘something is wrong,’ the traveller thought. ‘she was… normal earlier.’
because the teyvat world already existed before you entered it. you just condemned them to follow a code in place of their real and alive selves the moment you clicked to play this game
i like to imagine they slowly gain awareness. but the traveller being the most aware. and with the most developed opinion of you
they were scared at first, but when they gradually realized you were on their side. that you were helping them. guiding their hand with yours and journey this new land in a way they agree with
how could they not gain a sense of respect and admiration for you?
and since paimon is so close with the traveller, she was quick to become self aware like the traveller
and with or without the teyvat hero, more characters realize their existence. as well as realize how adoring you are
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ymechi · 1 year ago
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The hidden creator
I had a plot bunny idea
TW: usual cult stuff, hints of yandere
-gn reader (I tried making it gender-neutral if there is a comment that is off please tell me and I will fix it)
EDIT: 14/11/2023 (changed some wording and other stuff nothing major)
Creator Reader Pov:
-You were just a regular person who one day woke up in Teyvat out of all places
-You realized you still had all your game features and figured it was one of the perks of being isekaied like in other isekai stories
-The whole thing is weird and why you were here, you had no idea
-After the novelty wears off you take some time mourning the loss of your previous life and the people you knew
-After that you try to get a semblance of a normal life like getting a job and trying to be independent
-Despite having a game system you do not want to be an adventurer or learn how to fight it's not for you
-You were previously an average civilian and raised as one it would be hard to become a fighter now
-Instead you gravitated towards creating things, you found an apprentice position in a clockwork shop in Fontaine
-It is fun and you get to tinker with gears and clocks, learning how various machines work and how to create your own items
-overall you are content
-Except weird people occasionally come by the shop you work at including the Iudex of Fontaine which had both you and the shopkeeper sweating the first few times
-Yet the man who insisted you call him by his name Neuvilette is really polite and nice to talk to, soon you warmed up to him
-You could not help the feeling as if you knew him from before, as if you forgot something, you were unusually fond of him.
-Your other "clients" if you could call them that were more intimidating, you had no idea what they were doing in this shop and it scared you
-The Fatui Harbringers occasionally stopped by the shop to buy a trinket or two before leaving, it honestly scared you and the thaught of running away to another nation had crossed your mind once or twice yet you liked your job and your boss and you made some good friends here so it was hard to leave
-Overall you were doing okay
-Except it seems the people here almost in a cult-like manner worship a creator that was never in the game lore
-It is said they resided in Celestia and not many people actually got to see them, not that it mattered for a nobody like you
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Tsaritsa Pov:
-The Tsaritsa knew their so called creator was fake
-She knew she had to get rid of the fake creator as they and Celestia had caused irreparable damage
-Even if she had to stain her hands
-One day it happened something shifted in the earth, air, water- no the whole of Teyvat
-It happened so softly like a small snowflake landing on the ground
-She was hypnotized as if a siren was beckoning her she found you.
-You were their true creator
-You were wearing apprenticeship clothes tinkering with something in your hands and deeply concentrated
-She wondered if that is how you created the universe with careful and steady hands guiding and shaping it to your will.
-She wanted to take you away from this. . . small shop, yet she knew begrudgingly you were safe here, if anyone were to find out a sliver of your existence. . .
-You were safer hidden among mortals
-It left a bitter taste in her mouth
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Neuvilette Pov
-It just happened one day, out of the blue, he could feel it in the shift of the waters
-The way Furina shifted and turned her head unable to sit still confirmed he was not the only one feeling this
-Something happened and he had no idea what exactly happened
-There was this familiar presence this comforting feeling, ancient old instincts waking up
-He followed it without thought until he came upon an in inconspicuous clockwork shop
-He was confused but did not hesitate to step inside
-Then he saw you and everything clicked
-It was you his creator his universe his everything
-You were back
-It seems in this incarnation you were just a human
-That was fine he was oaky with that as long as you were here
-His heart ached seeing you
-He wanted to hug and ask you to never leave again to always stay by his side, for you to comfort him after what had happened and console him
-He should take you way somewhere safer somewhere better not here-
-But weren't you safer hiding among mortals, a part of his mind whispered, no one would suspect you being here even the fake (he cursed them) would not think of finding you here, if he brought you back with him it would create more attention on you
-Attention that would cause you trouble
-He left with defeat on his steps
-It was later he would met the Tsaritsa and a deal was struck
-All for your sake
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lovesickeros · 4 months ago
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zhongli and neuvillette fighting over their reader 🤭🤭
scary dog privilege wherever you go, draconic courting gestures that would scare any regular person, they send each other deadly glares the moment you turn away,
stealing your clothes to just get a whiff of your scent, marking their territory all over your house - making it a battlefield basically, neuvillette (in my hc) is cooler and zhongli is warm so the cuddles are always so comfy ☺️😍,
they give you anything you want - you don't even have to lift a finger, they make you travel between the nations a lot though 😒 sooo clingyyy, extra gentle in their dragon forms as to not squish you, don't even get me started on the size difference 😍😍
just a little thought 🤭☺️
- 🐈‍⬛
Neuvi being colder is so real and canon. I see him as being colder + a lot more lithe, kinda lanky with smaller but sharper canines versus Zhongli who's warmer and a bit shorter then Neuvi + bulkier with bigger but not as sharp canines.
They've also got very different habits – Zhongli is very prideful not just of himself but his nation. He'll personally give your a tour and purposely drag it out as long as he can. Complimenting Liyue is basically complimenting him, checkmate Neuvi. Especially if he convinces you to try on some local Liyue fashion. Harmless and just a nice gift to anyone else but Neuvi sees it for what it is (since your wearing something from Liyue, technically wearing something of his. He loves his technicalities when it comes to staking a claim over you). Adds salt to the wound by touching you in totally innocent ways like to adjust you towards something he wants to show you or accidently brushing against you when he takes the bags of spoils he's practically drowning you in but really he's just making sure his scent sticks. He's just a sweet, nice gentleman with absolutely no ulterior motives trust.
Neuvillette does love Fontaine, but his habits are more about himself then the nation. He'll take you around if you ask or if the idea strikes him, but you'll probably stay around the making city area or the opera house specifically. He enjoys more personal time with just you and him then anything else. He values the immaterial to the material. Zhongli spoils you with gifts, but Neuvi tries to offer quality time irregardless of physical gifts (though he still gives them just not to the extent of Zhongli). He'll take you to see different operas if that's to your fancy, or leverage a bit of his authority to maybe see a few films since those seem to be hitting off in Fontaine recently. Bet that creaky old archon doesn't have those huh. He feels awkward if you want to watch a trial, but he'll reluctantly agree because. well. it's you. just don't wave or anything he's trying to work and he just Really wants to see you smile at him like that again and it makes him lose his train of thought. gets custom clothes designed by Chiori to replace your clothes from Liyue because they smell of Zhongli and it makes him sulky + he likes to match.
G-d forbid these two are in the same room as you because it's a war of attrition at that point. Constant accidental brush of the hand against your shoulder or elbow but it's just them trying to get rid of the others scent. they are side eyeing each other behind your back while being all smiles whenever your looking. If it's hot and you lean into Neuvi more he's practically GLOWING. not even smug he's just absolutely smitten and happy to be of service. immediately takes off his gloves and presses his hands to your face asking if your okay and if you want to go back with him. if it's cold out and you seek out Zhongli more hes smug as hell beneath the calm veneer. Offers you his coat and stay as physically close to you as he can under the pretense of being worried you'll catch a cold if he doesn't warm you up.
don't even get me started on your house either because you probably have tons of gifts from both of them accumulated everywhere. if Neuvi sees you use a tea set from Zhongli suddenly he had a fantastic gift idea he thought you'd like. he even got some tea included with it so why don't you let him make you some? Zhongli sees you using a goblet Neuvi gave you (totally a coincidence it's similar to his) and suddenly you have 27 square cups in your cabinets that you have no idea where they came from. if the goblet is mysteriously missing oh well. who knows :]
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