#today just also sucked major ass anyway
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literally got the most mad I've been in a bit
idk why the character creator decided "let's give them daddy issues on MAX LEVEL" when I was being made
#the butts chronicles#idk. felt right tho#like I hate feeling lost. this felt. idk. correct ig cause#shit that happened lol#anywaysss#today just also sucked major ass anyway#bathroom ceiling finally busted open and I spent the day having to deal with that#it hopefully is over for now#still something left to do tomorrow but tbh idgaf Im major tired and gotta spend tomorrow in misery anywy so ✌️#ah well. necesito leche tbh
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Its weird because i dont actually have much of a desire to move to france or use french reguarly in my life but at this point ive deadicated over a year to learning it so i might as well keep going and finish
#it just makes me frustrated but whatevee#its like a pretty big part of my life but A. i never feel like i can chat about it#b. its generally increadibly difficult with no real way to track progress#c. its both. increadibly alienating and connecting#its so easy to feel lonely as a foreigner#foreigner isnt the right word since its the internet but thats the closest thing ive got#and i want to talk about it and share my music and what ive found but thats also difficult#because then people either expect you to be good at it which im literally not or#one time my friend made a comment at me like 'your french rap because your so cool'#and like NO!!!!! IM NOT COOL IM A LANGUAGE NERD!!!!!!#idk it made me feel bad and like. everytime i try to express my love for learning this i feel like a pretentious ass#when NO. im literally just enjoying a process and developing a skill that im very excited about and it sucks not beinf able to talk about it#it also doesnt help that the majority of instences are very small things#like today i met someone and asked them if they had a portal and they said no#THATS MASSIVE FOR ME. I ASKED A QUESTION AND GOT A RESPONSE. I TRANSCENDED LANGUAGE BARRIERS ARE YOU FUCKING ME#how is that not frankly INSANE#anyway idk. i want to be better but the joy is in the process or whst fucking ever#im also realising a lot of the time i feel like i have to prove myself to french servermates#i have to be useful i have to be generous i have to be a good builder#because if im not then im annoying and slow and everyone gets confused#im starting to want to find characters in shows like me who are stuck between languages and who are trying o reach across to others despite#idk learning a langauge has given me so much perspective on the world. other things seem to fall flat#its nice to feel smarter than i usually do#i often think im just not very smart at these kind of things but i am it just takes a different method for me i guess#idk#fish talks
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I will probably have to ask my manager at work if I can go down to less hours because I feel that if I don't I will manage to burn myself out like the kind of way I was burnt out for two years prior to this job lol
#Ramblings#Like. I love my job. I just feel that im going to burn out because i have already been feeling really close to burning out for the past#Month or so. Which SUCKS MAJOR FUCKING ASS#But also bringing that question up is going to be hard as well. Like how do i do it lol#Anyways sleep time#I am just kinda having a moment#Honestly i could really go for some of the really sour dragster candies (a pretty local brand of candy) or s-märken or even warheads#But also i bit my tongue earlier today so it would be painful to eat sour candy. Too bad i cannot be stopped
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— "What the fuck." You started at the merman who wriggled around for space. His eyes looked at you in fear as he saw you, before a blush had spread across his face.
Up until 30 seconds ago, you had lived a normal life, well, except for the obscene amount of work you were stressed out with. So you hopped on the boat your parents had gifted you some years ago and sailed into the sea. The feel of the ocean breeze hitting your face was a familiar sensation to you.
This was because your parents were fishermen and loved to eat seafood, and naturally, you had gravitated towards seafood, but with prices these days and your never-ending workload, it didn't allow you to do anything without setting you back on your tight deadlines. Until today.
You had gotten a whole week of paid vacation because a coworker was threatening to bring them to court for a long list of harassment. So they gave the people who worked the most a one week paid vacation. Though, to her, it wasn't enough, so you're getting a paid vacation week while they are still going to get sued. Whatever, its their fault either way.
Anyways, how did you reel in a merman that shouldn't even exist? Frankly, you don't know either. You had accidentally started to daydream, which turned into you not realizing something was caught, so instinctively, you were able to reel in a merman.
"H-huuuumann?" His deep moss green eyes stared at up at you with interest whilst you nearly got blinded by the shimmering gleem of his scales that were scattered across his cheeks. He stopped his advancements towards you until it was difficult to hold up his neck to see you.
"Erm... sorry for catching you, I was daydreaming. I'll unhook the fish hook attached to you..." You apologized and went down to unhook him, only for him to pull down your pants and underwear down, making you fall on the bench below you and stuffing his face in your genitals.
"Hey! W-what are you doing?" You pushed his face away, to which he pouted to. He sat there for a while as you tried to push him off the boat, to no avail.
"I... Accceppt thhis marrriaage!" He excitedly said as he tugged on your pants to gently pull it off again, but you held on tightly to your pants.
"What marriage? I didn't propose to you?" You evaded from his pulling hands in confusion.
"Whennn youuu reeeeledd mmeee inn dummmyy!" He slurred his words once more. "Shtop! I waant too tasstte you firrst beeforrre you tassteeee mee!" He huffed before his nails turned into sharp claws that shreaded your pants, then pulled down your underwear again and happily stuffing his face and licking your crotch with his tongue that felt rough.
Once more, you tried to move away but only ended up moaning at the feeling. Your face was slightly hot as you looked away but was swiftly pulled back in for a kiss, tasting your own fluids.
"Ah... finally... now it's your turn, cutie pie. We have to go to my hometown to get married <3"
"WHAT!?!? Firstly, no! Secondly, i will drown!"
"... Who said you can say no? When you reeled me, it was akin to a marriage proposal. Also, that's why you suck my dick and kiss me <333"
"WHAT--"
Was supposed to be posted yesterday, but when i saved a portion of it, i didn't see that i was save so i went back in to edit it to see what's rong before i saved it and for a slpilt second i saw the rest of it before it saved, so i lost majority of my work.
So now it looks like tjis. Womp womp. I think tjis is an afab reader? But i tried to make it gn as possible but i wannted a weird ass mermaid culture where to speak another's language, you gotta eat them out/suck them off before kissing person to speak. At first i wanted him to just kiss in order to get the language js like starfire but i was like,, so what do i do with him tryna eat you out??,, then boom yeahh.
Also, yo quero voy en me casaaaaaa *cries pathetically* No me gusta Español :((((((( not proofread. L
Edit: i forgot about tags. Mb.
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the two of us — h. zoë
PAIRING. Hange Zoë x female reader SYNOPSIS. You are the Female titan under Dr. Zoë's experiments, could it be that your relationship is growing to something more? CONTENT. 18+, MDNI, mentions of squirting, oral sex, some light angst, Erwin stirring conflict WORD COUNT. 2.3k A/N. this is part 2 of captive as requested by @coconutchan (hope u don't mind me tagging u hehe) (I just noticed that captive is also 2.3k words long lmaooo major coincidence xD)
"You're an extremely unethical scientist, you know that?" you managed to mutter in between the soft moans spilling from your lips, a hand clutching on the couch as Hange continued to spread you open for them.
"That's a very vague way to say `Hey, Hange thanks for making me squirt four times in less than an hour,ʼ" Hange chuckled, raising their head a little to get a good look at your flushed face. Their breath breezed on your soak folds, their lips digging in to suck your clit once more.
Your back arched, hips chasing the expanse of their tongue as they kept a firm palm against your inner thigh. They've been in this position for half an hour, head buried between your thighs. What started as a frivolous banter ended up with another intimate session as if you hadn't done it early that morning.
"You're exaggerating," you argued, trying to ease down how much your legs shook as another wave of orgasm crashed right at your core. Hange smiled to themself, their tongue rolling on your insides to gather up the remnants of your release. When they sat up, you couldn't help but roll your eyes at the sight of that perpetual smirk in their face, showing their smugness right after making you come. Hange was too aware of just how good you felt under their touch, their eyes reading at every rise of your chest or every soft moan you managed to slip out.
"I think your soaked skirt could speak for itself, sweetheart," they snickered once more, taking a good look at the mess under you before pulling down the skirt bundled at your waist. "You've been so good today despite your bratty attitude. I like it."
With that remark, you might have been tempted to kick their ass just as you sat up. Not only did they refer to your intimate sessions but also to the information you managed to give them so far. Hange fixed their creased shirt, their other hand leafing through the pages containing what they know about your abilities as a titan shifter. It was difficult to make you talk but Hange managed to pull through by asking the right questions and just enough charm. Hange lightly bit on the edge of their pen, eyes trailing down their list.
"Hm, I wonder what else?" they thought out loud. Hardening, agility, stamina, speed, endurance... what else?
"Flexibility," you butted on their train of thoughts, busy smoothing out your clothes with a firm palm.
Hange glanced at you, eyes crinkling as they smirked, "Oh, I know that already."
"How observant of you," you scoffed.
Hange tilted their head, facing you as they spoke.
"That's true and I know there are things you haven't told me yet."
"Those are things you should be finding out by yourself, Doctor."
"I like it when you're difficult," Hange laughed, a brief hearty one from their throat.
"Cause it turns you on?"
"Oh, don't get me started with that," Hange grinned, flipping through the few pages for the last time. "Anyway, I still have experiments for you tomorrow."
Hange gave a soft pat on your hair, fingers lingering for just a moment before they stood up.
"Rest for now, alright?"
As they walked out and disappeared behind the door of that lab, you wanted to ask where they would go, a subtle plea to tell you their whereabouts so you could drift off to sleep knowing that they would come back. But as the door shut closed and lights went off, you cursed at your vulnerability, trying to cut away the possible tether linking your heart to theirs.
Hange is an enemy. Your enemy.
You shut your eyes, squeezing out the lingering unwelcome thoughts, burying them in a place far away. But even at the edge of sleep, your mind snapped, pulling you out of a hazy scene of dream as the door opened once more.
Light poured in, a blurring white at the edge spilling at the center table and some lab equipment was strewn at the side. You sat up, grazing over the figure's taller stature entering. Your hand felt for the shiv squeezed on the crevice in the couch, your body in alert stance as you felt that the person approaching wasn't Hange just from the heavier footsteps against the floor. The switch was flicked on, filling the room with light once more.
Then there he was, the man you were warned about, the devil himself in the flesh: Erwin Smith. If it wasn't for his astute planning as the mastermind of the previous attack, you wouldn't have been on the couch of this lab, experimented by your enemies.
Erwin greeted you with much politeness, a practiced formality of words carefully crafted for his prey. Your mind skipped over his pleasantries, focusing on the language in his eyes that his words couldn't hide. It was clear, even at the stray threads from his careful weaving that he only sees you as nothing but a weapon to be used later on. Even as he sat across from you with that friendly smile and conversational tone of interest, you couldn't put a sliver of trust in him.
"To be honest, Dr. Zoë insisted on your stay here, Y/N," he said, a hand indicating the laboratory and your unrestrained hands. "Such a considerate move, bearing in mind that you are a trained soldier."
He stood up, walking over to the lab equipment as if in inspection. Hange frequently used those tools and equipment but found no time to clean up the dusting wires powering the engine inside.
"Given this unrestraint opportunity, you could have tampered with the equipment without Hange knowing." Erwin ran a finger on the trail of dust before continuing, "But you see? Nothing was touched in here. No sign of infringement."
He looked back at you with a small, knowing smile and ever-perusing eyes. "Why is that, I wonder?"
"I shouldn't say anything that could be used against me, don't you think?" You swallowed the lump in your throat, hard eyes set upon him when truly your heart wanted to bury itself deeper as if doing so would get you off Erwin's perusal.
"Oh, right. Fair enough," he said but only stepped closer from where you sat. "However... I'm starting to think that a seasoned soldier such as yourself is falling for Dr. Zoë's charms."
And even before you could utter a rebuttal, he only stepped closer and continued, "Their charm is their greatest tactic next to their intellect. I would say that even a mindless titan would yield."
Followed by a humorless chuckle, a smile curled on the side of his lip.
"You, Y/N, you've become so obedient to them as far as I can see. Even someone as stubborn as yourself could be coaxed into submission, after all," he said, eyes gazing down at your stature. You felt indignant at how small you were from where he stood.
Your tongue twisted into a knot, the outbursts you have for him clamped shut and swallowed into an endless pit. The anger bubbling up your chest could only transpire as a hard glare as he moved to open the door once more.
"Anyway, I'll be taking my leave since I really had no business in here," Erwin waved, taking a step outside. "I'm glad Hange has made the couch cozy for you."
—
Anger. Is that what you should've felt from his words? Anger at his inner sneer, his subtle taunts, or perhaps anger at the truth that you have been so compliant to Hange's wishes. You've become too trusting, yielding with no questions asked to their words and touch. You've doubted their intentions to a certain degree but never acted upon that thought because no matter how much you denied the truth to yourself, Hange has already warmed your heart to let them in. You've fallen to whatever deception they have in mind.
Your eyes pierced nothingness as you gripped the weapon right in your hands. Your thoughts crawled into your limbs, letting them think for you as the door opened once more. Hange was caught off guard as you pounced into them, knocking them on the floor and your thighs straddling their torso. A gasp escaped their lips as they felt all your weight pressing them down the ground, the shiv you were previously holding pointed perilously at the vein of their neck. Hange couldn't ask what brought them on your grip or even scan your face as your hair fell over your face. However, your tight and almost desperate grip on their collar became enough to subdue the questions flooding their mind.
"Y/N?" Hange asked, eyes chasing yours for an explanation, an emotion to be understood.
"You'll have to answer my questions or else," your voice was low and rough, Hange wondered if you'd cried or what had angered you so much to lose that calm voice they're familiar with.
"I see you've made a shiv. Quite efficient of you. I didn't even notice," Hange remarked, trying to smile and ease themself down. Their palm rested on your thigh upon instinct, but the shiv only brought its tip closer to the flesh of their throat.
"What do you truly want from me?" you muttered, voice threatening to break.
"Could you elaborate on that?" Hange asked as a slight confusion passed over their eyes.
"You know damn well what I'm talking about." When you responded, Hange sensed your frustration, drawing a taut line only to be ripped out.
What do you want from me? Hange thought over your question, their mind ramming one response they couldn't utter. They want to brush the hair off your face, alleviate the distrust forming around your relationship, or just hold your hand if you will let them. Hange threw their head back to the floor, lying on their bundled hair like spilled brown ink.
"I want what every researcher wants, Y/N," Hange spoke softly. "Results."
"Sure, yes. Results from the experiments. Then retrieve the Female titan from me. That's it? I'm sure you won't stop on that."
"You know I shouldn't tell you about that, right?"
"And you know I can kill you right now if I wanted to," you shot back, your glowering eyes boring through them.
"I know, sweetie. You're aiming to puncture a major artery right there by the looks of it." Hange smiled softly in surrender, their other hand lying by their side as the other never left your thigh. Their body was too relaxed under you. Too submitting, too comfortable in knowing that you wouldn't hurt them. It only boiled you up inside, tempted to leave a crude mark on their neck just to make a point. But you only let go of their collar, the tip of your shiv drawing in an unthreatening stance on their clothed chest.
"I hate you," you muttered.
"Listen to me, Y/N." Hange clasped your hand but you only pulled it away from them.
"Why would you do this?"
"Do what?" Hange mumbled to themself but retracted almost immediately as they glimpsed your eyes for the first time. It wasn't anger or violence they'd read, but a pure wounded look that pricked their heart. Hange knew you were questioning the motive behind every touch, every kiss, and every pleasure you've shared since that moment they had you. You might have thought yourself a prey, lured into the trap of those lovely brown eyes, of that teasing smile, and of their loving touch. Hange sat up against your softening grip.
"Listen to me first," they whispered, clasping both of your hands near their chest. "You see, I didn't plan beyond experimenting on you. But I have a vague idea of what I want to do."
Their eyes did not waver behind those glasses as they spoke. "This may cost me my license or, hell, even my neck. But... I'm not planning to take the Female titan from you."
Their statement came as a surprise, your mind running around the possibilities of what could that mean but found none you could accept to be true.
"What...?"
Hange smiled softly. "You know what I mean, Y/N. I want you to join my side."
Betrayal. Betray Eldia. Forget we're enemies and be with me, their words translated themselves on your head, etching a frown on your face.
"What... What makes you think I'll follow along those plans?"
"I'm not expecting you to," Hange sighed, relaxing on where they sat and no longer restraining your hand gripping the shiv. "Of course, you will never let yourself become a weapon against your own kind. But that's not what I have in mind.
"I know it would be difficult for you to believe me again but I need your trust this time. I don't have a clear vision of what will become of us but know that in the future I envision, it would be just you and me. No war or another bloody clash between Marley and Eldia," Hange sighed, letting go of you as they stood up, eyes locked on yours. "I never planned to kill you the moment you stepped in here, Y/N. Trust me and I'll tell you everything."
Trust. The word played in your mind once more, repeating itself in various tones of inquiry and mockery. Hadn't you become too trusting and reprimanded with a cruel hand right after? The harsh scars and claws on your insides writhed, sending your mind back to your roots to decide for you. You're not just the Female titan or an Eldian soldier, you are Y/N, ingrained with a will and desire of your own.
"Fine," you muttered, pulling the collection of makeshift weapons you hid on yourself, even a small prized weapon on your ring finger. Your stern, stone-cold eyes met Hange's as you placed the dangerous collection in a neat line on the center table. "I'm trusting you."
You sat back on the couch with transparent intentions this time, the sinister thought of regret shoved at the back of your mind as you spoke.
"Now tell me everything.”
likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated, sweethearts <3
#hange zoë#hanji zoë#hange zoe#hanji zoe#hange zoe x reader#hanji zoe x reader#hange zoe x you#hanji zoe x you#hange zoe x y/n#hanji zoe x y/n#hange zoe smut#hanji zoe smut#hange x reader#hanji x reader#hange x y/n#hanji x y/n#hange x you#hanji x you#aot x reader#aot x y/n#aot x you#aot x female reader#attack on titan fanfiction#shingeki no kyojin fanfiction#✂ rem writes____✍︎
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all flights are delayed !
"i like to call myself a pretty man connoisseur.."
synopsis: your sad to say it, but you don't have much going on in your life. you have a very time consuming major, just a few friends, barely any time to go out, and spend most of your free time either a: working, or b: sleeping. so for once, when you finally have the friday off, and your dragged off to go watch a football game between a rival school of yours, you really do wish you were anywhere else. somehow though, it turns out to be one of the best things to happen to you, because a charming oreo–haired musical theater major from your rival school just happens to saunter his way into your life, you didn't expect to fall in love in your junior year, but your also not complaining!
pairing: xiao dejun x male!reader
genre: college au, strangers to friends to lovers, musical theater major!xiaojun x health science major!reader, fluff, like the lightest of angst, lowkey fast burn 😖
warnings: swearing, mentions of drinking, kissing(?), gay people, a little miscommunication, reader having a crisis over oreo xiaojun, probably a lot of repetitive phrases, huang guanheng is EVERYWHERE
word count: 12.8k
notes: OKAAAAAAAY hello! now in the beginning i really did enjoy writing this but after like the fourth scene its all so disgusting and jumbled up but i am also very proud of myself because this is the longest ever fic i have ever written (it is all xiao dejuns fault), actually it is ALL of nct's fault because why do i have a bunch of 8k word fics of so many nct members..😢 anyway if this seems any rushed or makes absolutely no sense at times its because im tired and i worked extra today but it doesn't really matter because constructive criticism is good (i shouldn't even publish this tbh) but there is a first for everything! enjoy!
YOU'VE NEVER BEEN A FOOTBALL FAN. now you know that might be a little of a sour opinion, especially to the men in your family, but it's just never been a sport you enjoy. it is just a little fun to watch, especially when drunk, because the sight of men in tight ass clothes running around a field chasing a ball is possibly one of the funniest things you think your drunk mind has ever seen. which is why now— in the stands, listening to the loud shouts and screams from your schoolmates, and rival scholars, you feel as if your ears have just been popped.
after all the days of working, and doing nothing but schoolwork, you were glad to have the rest of the friday off. there was nothing else you wanted to do but put on an oversized sweater, make a bowl of ramen and rewatch gossip girl for the seventy fifth time already (yes, you keep count), but no— guanheng decided he was going to drag you out of the dorm to watch stupid football game, one about "school spirit" or whatever, you weren't paying attention to him when he decided to go on his ramble, and now he's abandoned you once again! probably off to go talk to one of his 1000 other friends or something.
you almost consider leaving, but then you witness the amount of people you'd have to maneuver through, the amount of excuse me's you'd have to utter, the amount of pushing you'd endure as you tried to make your way through the crowded stands, besides, you can't leave without guanheng, your pretty much the only person responsible for keeping him alive at this point.
so you somehow suck it up and manage to stick around. your ears are practically on fire right now, and you desperately want to take off your shoes because of how they are poking you at the moment. you almost feel like your being pressed together by all the people in the stands, as if walls are slowly pushing in and crushing every single bone in your body.
"that team is doing horribly.." you mutter to yourself in an attempt to calm your crazy mind.
"i know, we suck".
at first you think you've made up the voice, because in the past hour and a half all you've heard is shouting, cheering, and loud music blasting on your ears, no one has made any attempt to talk to you since guanheng up and left you alone in the stands, so the response almost seems like muddled up words created by your brain as a response—
but it's not.
someone actually did respond to you, and in a split second there is a completely new person standing beside you, also observing the game but not looking as pleased to be there. when you do glance to your left, you come across possibly the most beautiful boy— no, person, you come across the most beautiful person you think you've ever seen in your twenty years of living, for once it feels like everything stops.
you are not the kind of person that just.. does that. now you've met tons of pretty people, you've met so many people that you could definitely say are so beautiful they could be displayed in a museum as an art exhibit, but never in your twenty years of living have you ever seen yourself go silent at the sight of a beautiful person— your brain feels like it's malfunctioning, you're not exactly sure what to say, you open your mouth but no words come out, and you almost consider punching yourself because you probably look like a complete idiot right now.
"oh? you don't go here?"
that's what you decided to say? of all things you could've said, of course he doesn't go to your school, he just implied that the other team belonged to his school, why would that be the best thing to say out of everything else?
the stranger looks up, then he laughs, and your not sure how you keep your composure. "oh no, i go to vixsith" he replies, using his thumb to point backward, though he's not pointing at anything in specific, just pointing to point. you're not sure why you pick up on that, or why you're even watching where his hands are going anyway.
"your insulting your own team?" you inquire, and he laughs even harder at your question, covering his mouth with his hand. "this is about school spirit, have faith in them" you joke, and all he does is continue laughing, crossing his arms as he tries his best to calm himself down.
"i'm being honest, the only person on that team who knows how to play is mark, he deserves better" he remarks, eyes focused on the player he just named. he then seems to have a random realization and turns to you once again. "i'm dejun by the way" he holds out his hand for you to take, and you just blink at it like an idiot, before coming back to your senses and quickly shaking his head.
"y/n".
at the sound of your name, he seems to have yet another realization. he points at you and narrows his eyes. "we have a mutual friend don't we?"
at the question, you narrow your eyes, cogs turn in your brain as you think about who he could possibly be referring to, then it comes to you—
"guanheng".
the two of you say his name in unison, and the two of you both try to stifle your laughs as the realization dawns on you. "he knows everyone i swear" you mutter, and dejun snorts, looking away from you to laugh. "even from other schools.."
"oh we go way back" dejun responds, moving his hair out of his face. "middle school actually" he adds, and your eyes widen, as if your shocked, of course guanheng has friends from way back when, why are you surprised?
you don't feel as surprised as you do lucky..
"was he still as inhumanely flexible as he is now?"
dejun laughs again, he does that a lot. "yes, yes he was".
"he talks about you a lot.. you know" dejun comments out of the blue, tucking his hair behind his ear. "he basically lives with us, and if he's not sleeping over we always assume he's with you".
"oh so that's why he always just.. appears and disappears.."
"yeah that's kind of his thing" dejun scrunches his face, looking bored by the lack of action happening on the field. "i can never find him unless he directly comes to me first" he doesn't look at you as he says those words, but you're very much staring at him the whole time.
you almost feel like a creep in a way, you want to punch yourself in the face again for continuing to stare at him. you blink a couple times before turning your face away, trying to correctly articulate your thoughts.
"both teams suck".
you only say those words because you want him to continue talking, you want to hear him talk, it's nothing that crazy, having a conversation with him is just so intriguing to you for some reason..
"well yeah— but you guys get more training so you have an advantage" he comments, narrowing his eyes at the field, arms crossed over his chest. "the guys on our team have no idea what their doing".
"do you like football?" you ask, not sure why your so interested in his answer, you just are, you have no explanation for your sudden intrigue of this charming oreo–haired boy that goes to your rival school.
your much too distracted by how gorgeous he is to worry about giving yourself an explanation.
dejun laughs again, shaking his head. "not really, my dad does, so i just know things because of all his screaming and shouting" he replies, arms still crossed over his chest. "i'm not really a sports person, i do musical theater for pete's sake".
"oh so you sing?" you don't mean to ask another question, you're worried that you might be bothering dejun with your constant inquiries, but he actually seems glad, excited that someone is asking him about his major.
"well yeah" he responds, his smile growing. "all things theater, i write the songs, i act the parts, i play instruments, sometimes i even take offstage roles instead of my usual onstage ones".
he fiddles with his fingers, picking his nails. you assume, from his mannerisms, that he doesn't know what to say because most people don't really ask him about his major, or what he does, it's like he's elated that you even asked him.
"what about you?" dejun instead asks, veering away from the topic of his major and instead making yours the main topic of discussion. "what do you do?"
"health science" you say the words as if it pains you to, like it's the single most uninteresting thing you've said this whole interaction. "i know, it's boring".
dejun laughs again; "no no! i didn't say that!" he waves his hands in a disagreeing manner as he chuckles at your words. "i just don't meet a lot of people interested in pursuing science.."
"it's more of the health aspect than science actually" you mutter, and dejun just looks even more interested in what you have to say now. "but science is a big part of it so.."
"you must be very smart then" dejun remarks, smiling as the two of you make eye contact.
"i'm alright" you just say, finally pulling down your formerly rolled up sweater sleeves now that the air outside has begun cooling down. you only lightly shiver, and you glance back at dejun one more time..
"where do you think guanheng is?" he asks, clearing his throat as he scours the still full and lively bleachers, searching for your friend. "off doing whatever he does.."
you're currently very distracted, and you don't even realize what's going on when you snap out of whatever daze you were having and everyone is suddenly standing up and cheering like there's no tomorrow.
dejun looks over at you, and he can clearly see how confused you are because he laughs for one last time. "you guys won!" he somehow manages his voice over the roar of the crowd. "congrats!"
he's yelling, but he's not exactly loud, he still manages to sound so gentle whilst yelling at you.
"thanks!" you blurt out as a reply, and you feel like a complete idiot for that, but dejun smiles, so you don't feel all that embarrassed.
the game is over, and people are going to start to leave soon. dejun looks back, spotting a group he recognizes, then he looks over at you, a smile on his face. "i've gotta go now" he says, almost disappointed in a sense. "it was nice meeting you y/n!"
you nod, not knowing what to say. "yeah! you too!"
you too? you too?? is that what you say y/n!?
dejun gives one more beautiful smile before heading off, and you blink, having absolutely no idea what just transpired in those few minutes.
holy shit i forgot to ask—
but you couldn't— because he was gone, gone in such a flash you couldn't even spot his oreo hair in the crowd.
YOU FORGOT TO ASK FOR HIS NUMBER. YOU FEEL SO STUPID, your not even sure why you wanted to ask him that, but in the back of your mind that was the question you were preparing yourself to ask from the moment he told you his name, that he was friends with guanheng, the moment the two of you began laughing about your majors and stuff like that. the whole interaction with a pretty oreo–haired musical theater major at a football game is all that you were thinking about last night, as you tried to find pretty much anything else to think about as you struggled to sleep.
how did you forget to ask him for his number? you want to smash your face into your computer screen because of how stupid you are. you said "you too!" like a fucking idiot, but maybe you were just too distracted, he was smiling at you with that beautiful smile and staring at you with his absolutely gorgeous fucking eyes, how could you even think coherently whilst a beautiful man (from a whole other school but who cares?) was staring at you with his pretty brown eyes like you were the only person in the world?
okay your pushing it now..
but there is just something, something about him that drew you in, your not sure why you were so adamant on getting to know him, but he was just so— you can't explain it right now! you are currently very sleep deprived and also moody because of your disappearing roommate that always decides to appear at the worst times.
you don't remember the last time you ever got an actual eight hours of sleep, these days that seems like a dream more than a reality, but guangheng is just never tired. he's somehow always up, doing something, hanging out with people, he never sits down in once place and just stays still.
when he walks into the room, hands on his hips and gaze immediately focused on you, you barely bat an eye at him, just spare him a quick glance, noticing how pissed off he looks. you scour your mind for an explanation as to why he must be mad now, probably something someone said, or he got into yet another argument with one of his classmates, your not even sure anymore, you don't know where he is half the time.
"could you do me a favor?"
you almost laugh out loud, not at him, but at the idea that he wanted you to do him a favor. at this point, he probably owes you thousands of favors considering how many you do for him, but he seems upset, and you don't have any of that pettiness leftover to ignore him, so you move your eyes to look over at him.
"why should i?"
okay— you lied, your still just a little petty, but you totally have every right to be! guanheng deserves just some sass from you after disappearing each and every time he decides to take you out somewhere.
guanheng blinks, then he pulls out the signature guanheng frown, a sad stupid frown he always makes when he wants to persuade you into doing something. you're not sure how you've even ever fallen for that signature frown, maybe it's because he's just so great at looking sad, at looking upset, he somehow always manages to make you feel bad for him, and therefore, end up doing the favor for him.
"because i'm your best friend, your roommate, and you love me so much" guanheng smiles wide, like he just found out he won the lottery, and clasps his hands together as he rocks back and forth on his heels.
"i don't know.." you mumble, looking back at your computer screen. it's a saturday, you have no classes saturday, you can just sit down, relax, be the absolute lazy motherfucker you were put on this earth to be. "i don't feel like going out today".
guanheng huffs, crossing his arms. "one last favor! just one! then i'll get off your back!"
"your horrible at following your promises, heng" you comment absentmindedly, your tone is much meaner than you intended, and guanheng's gasp is enough to tell you that he indeed takes offense to those words. "what? i'm not lying".
"y/n!" oh great, he's whining now. "i will get you anything i can, anything! just this one favor! please?"
your about to say no again— but then it's like a lightbulb goes off in your head, and you get a spectacular idea. anything? he did say anything, and he can give you something you want.
the number of a pretty boy preferably!
you let out a sigh, and guanheng knows what that sigh means, it means you agree. "fine, i'll do you this favor, but this is the last one".
guanheng's smile brightens, and he cheers like a kid that just got the best christmas present one can receive. "thank you! thank you! thank you! i love you!" he kisses your cheek, and skips off to another room.
"get your jacket!" he shouts, already rooms away from you, so he has to shout.
"what?"
"get your jacket! were leaving!"
you furrow your eyebrows at his words, but you don't say anymore, because you did agree to do this favor for him after all.
so, without questioning it more, you get up and go grab your jacket.
"SO WHEN YOU SAID A FAVOR..?" you don't continue on with your sentence, pausing to let out a breath as you shove your hands into the pockets of your jackets. guanheng looks over at you, and he just chuckles at the unreadable expression on your face. when you agreed to do this favor for him, you didn't know it included leaving your dorm and having to be dragged out to yet another unfamiliar place. "did you forget to mention the fact that we'd have to leave the school?" you finally finish, eyes focused and narrowed on your friend, who again, smiles at you with that signature guanheng smile.
"it's a saturday, most of us don't have classes anyway, they won't question it".
"is that supposed to make me feel better?" you ask to yourself more than to guanheng, but he hears you anyway, and that results in a snicker from him. despite that, he doesn't respond to your silent question, making you frown just the slightest.
"stop pouting".
"i'm not pouting" your quick to rebut, rolling your eyes at his words. you almost bump into him when he suddenly stops, and your about to yell at him again for being stupid when he places a finger on your mouth.
he knocks on the door in front of him, not paying attention to the burning glare your currently sending him.
"i'll bite off your finger" you threaten, moving forward and pretending your about to do that. guanheng squeaks and quickly moves his fingers away from your lips, a flash of true fear in his eyes. all you do is give him a menacing and totally not threatening smile.
"psycho.." he whispers, he looks like he's about to say more, but the door opens, so he closes his mouth and turns around.
"come on!"
he grabs your wrist and drags you into the dorm, and you felt your heart rate increase. maybe he knew these people, but you sure didn't! what if they thought you were weird? you want to pull him back and tell him that he shouldn't just drag you into some strangers dorm, but he is much too distracted to even notice your uneasiness.
"i've returned!" guanheng yells, letting go of your hand to place his hands on his hips, as if he was proud of himself.
"can you slam the door on him!?"
"ten! come to me!"
before you can ask him what the hell is going on, he sprints down the hallway, you assume to go after this ten person, you just blink, shoving your hands into your pockets as you begin to rock back and forth on your heels.
"hello stranger!" an unfamiliar voice exclaims, you look up and come face to face with a pink–haired boy with a bright smile.
"hello" you reply politely. "i like your hair" you immediately remark, pointing at his hair like an idiot because you don't want to touch it and make him uncomfortable.
his face lights up, as if you were a millionaire that just gifted him a life changing amount of money. it was as if no one ever told him that his hair was pretty before, or that they liked it. he jumps up and squeals, excited. "thank you! ten said it was stupid!"
you furrow your eyebrows, then chuckle. "what? no it's very pretty, pink suits you!"
"hah! i told you guanheng! pink does suit me!" he yells down the hall, and you can hear the small shout of rebuttal that guanheng responds with from all the way down the hall. "thanks! only a few people actually noticed that i dyed my hair".
you laugh again, okay he is very funny, you like him!
"oh! i'm yangyang! the nicest person who lives here!" he introduces himself in the same fashion a reality tv star would, and quickly grabs your hand to shake it. you don't complain, just laugh again as he vigorously shakes your hand.
"y/n, it's nice to meet you".
he gasps, recognizing your name. "oh you're the famous y/n! guanheng always talks about you, for a long time i was convinced he was in love with you!"
"why are you tarnishing my brand!?" guanheng shouts again, sounding even more pissed off than he did before. "huh!? liu yangyang!?"
yangyang shakes his head, ignoring guanheng's loud shouts and flapping his hand, mocking him. you laugh as you watch him mock the other, who has absolutely no idea what he's doing right now.
"you have a project to do!" another unfamiliar voice shouts.
yangyang gasps again, suddenly looking stressed. "fuck yeah— um!" he turns around and reaches over to grab his laptop, then he turns back to you and gives you a smile.
"yeah, my apologies" you just wave it off, urging him to keep going. "um i'm doing a project where i have to interview people on their majors.. trust me i don't know either, but! i've interviewed like the whole school already, and i need one more person.."
"and that person is me?" you ask, but you already know the answer to that question, yangyang nods, much more quickly than he seemed to intend to.
"yes!" he exclaims, but then he clears his throat. "but only if you want to, i don't want to force you into anything you don't want to do—"
"no no no it's fine!" you cut into his sentence, shaking your head. yangyang, again, looks elated that you agreed.
okay so this was the favor guanheng wanted you to for him! (not for him necessarily— but his friend). he could've just told you about this straight up instead of being vague about it, it wasn't even that burdening of a favor, not like the other ones you've done for him.
"guanheng! why don't you bring him around more often? he's better than you are!" yangyang yells again, probably for the nth time that hour.
guanheng doesn't answer, but you knows he's pouting, you can just sense it at this point, you call it your "roommate instincts".
"oh hi y/n".
now that's a voice you recognize, and you almost don't believe your eyes when the one person that kept you up all night walks into the room and smiles as he sees your figure. "dejun, hi" you smile back at him, hoping you don't sound as awkward as you feel.
dejun looks so so pretty, as he always does. he fiddles with the necklace hanging around his neck, his eyes lingering on you for an unspecified amount of time.
"ten hit me with his shoe" guanheng suddenly storms into the room, arms crossed over his chest. "asshole.." he mutters under his breath, huffing like some sort of baby.
dejun then laughs, covering his mouth with his hand, and that causes you to laugh, turning your head to the side as to not make it obvious.
guanheng exchanges glances between the both of you, a prominent glare in his eyes, but then the look in his eyes changes, and he points at the two of you. "you two have met?" he asks.
dejun pauses, still humored by the previous words said by guanheng, and your brain almost malfunctions once again. "i— um" great, you just sound so natural and not awkward.
"we met at the game" dejun immediately says, saving you the awkwardness of having to collect your words in your brain. you thank whatever god or deity up there for dejun's quick response, and he just flashes you that familiar pretty smile. "yesterday, you know, while you were off doing who knows what.."
guanheng gasps, looking at dejun like he'd just cursed his entire bloodline. "you— your just such a bitch! you know!?"
"ow! don't punch me! i'm fragile!"
guanheng lands one more punch on his shoulder, and it gets one more squeak out of dejun, who jumps once again. "i don't care, your horrible".
yangyang blinks, probably already used to their little quarrels. he then turns to you, just shaking his head as they continue to whisper–argue. "so, what do you major in?"
it's almost like you totally forgot, his project, the thing that guanheng dragged you here to help him with. "health sciences, i take courses in everything related to healthcare and like— half actual science courses?"
"so your looking to work in healthcare?"
"yeah basically, i've already taken courses in emergency service's, becoming a paramedic is my top option!"
yangyang gasps at your words, he looks over at guanheng, then quickly back at you. "are you single?" he asks, again with the same quickness.
dejun snorts, hitting guanheng as begins laughing hard. guanheng scrunches his nose, staring at yangyang like he's crazy. "what kind of question is that!?"
"what? that is a totally valid question to ask!" he exclaims, crossing his arms. "it's for my project! clearly!" he lies.
"your— oh my god, unbelievable".
"so are you?" yangyang asks again, looking at you with suspenseful eyes. he is very much interested in your answer it seems.
your finally finished with your laughing fit, and nod, still very amused. "yes i am, i'm single".
"good, this is very important information".
yangyang gives you a giddy look, and dejun just continues to laugh.
you're not sure why your so focused on him though..
YOU AGAIN, HAVE NO LUCK SLEEPING that night, and after the first hour and a half of tossing and turning, you gave up on trying to chase slumber you knew you wouldn't be able to catch. you assumed that the longer you stared at your computer screen, the quicker you'd get tired and the quicker your eyes would become heavier, but no! it's now almost two in the morning and you still aren't sleepy in the tiniest bit, you didn't know insomnia got this bad, if you knew this prior to coming back to school this year, you would've bought more of those sleeping pills. you lean your chin onto your hand as your computer continues playing audio from a random episode of brooklyn nine–nine.
the millions of thoughts rampant in your mind were probably distracting you, rendering it impossible to sleep, and also rendering it impossible to focus, seeing as your just looking around your room, which is pretty much boring you considering all you've been doing for the past thirty minutes is looking around your own room.
you think your gonna bore yourself to death, you pretty much prepare to stay up for the next five hours until your alarm rings and startles you out of your daze (which has happened way too many times for your comfort), but then your phone rings.
it's almost two in the morning, who exactly is calling you at this time? who knows that you're awake at 1:56 in the morning and decided to call you? they probably knew you'd pick up..
and you know who it is— it's so obvious.
dejun.
you don't mean to pick up your ringing phone as fast as you do, you want to punch yourself in the face for how desperate you seem, and you almost don't answer the phone because you feel so embarrassed. "hello?"
"hi!" dejun sounds way too joyous for someone who is sleep deprived, and up at 1:57 am. "sorry? was that too loud?"
"no no your fine" you reply, even though the speaker is on, guanheng can quite literally sleep through anything, there was one time the fire alarm was going off for a good ten minutes and he didn't even budge. "guanheng is a pretty heavy sleeper".
"he's lucky, i can't sleep" the sound of shuffling on the other line resonates in your ears, and dejun huffs, sounding frustrated. "you were the only person i assumed would be awake".
you snicker. "why is that?" you inquire, he was right, of course, but you just wanted to hear his reasoning, and also wanted him to keep talking.
you really like dejun's voice for some reason, it just scratches the right part of your brain. in these past two days you realized that you like a lot of things about dejun, many more things than you thought you might.
"your major has the word 'science' in it so i just assumed the amount of sleep you get is slim to none".
now that gets another laugh out of you, you laugh much more than you intend to, but also— it's dejun, and you can't resist the loud laugh that escapes your lips.
oh your such a desperate little bitch—
"well you'd be correct" you respond, humming as you pick at your nails. "at this point sleeping is beginning to make me tired".
there's a long pause, and your worried you made everything more awkward, because you don't hear anything from the other line. for a moment, you're almost convinced dejun hung up on you, but before you can speak he beats you to it.
"i can keep you company until you get tired" he immediately suggests, and you almost choke on your spit when he says that. "i don't mind".
you go silent, feeling as if all logical thoughts in your mind have suddenly disappeared into the air. you might sound like a complete loser right now but that was just so sweet of him to suggest, you smile much too wide for your own comfort, but you don't even think about that, because your just so charmed by the words.
"you are.." you pause, clasping your hands together as you think about what words to say next. "yeah yeah, that's fine" you finally continue, your new words having no connection to the previous ones you previously said, you just hope dejun doesn't notice.
"good! it would've been awkward if you said no" dejun giggles, and you just can't get over how cute he sounds. "plus, i wouldn't want you to be tired in the morning, lord knows how much you do in a day.."
you feel an unfamiliar fluttering feeling in your stomach, because he is so considerate? he wants to help you, he's just being so nice to you at.. two! two in the morning! you bite down on your bottom lip, hoping it doesn't bleed from how hard your tooth drives into it.
"aww, you care about me that much?" you ask, just wanting to hear him talk again. you feel like a teenage girl giggling and kicking her feet over a high school crush, except you can't kick your feet and giggle because then dejun would know.
"okay, be quiet, don't make me hang up".
"okay okay don't do that!" you say, totally meaning to sound as desperate as possible this time. "if your not here i won't ever fall asleep".
you hear something similar to a squeal on the other line, as if dejun had heard your words and just freaked out.
the realization honestly boosted your ego.
"you— you suck!"
"you offered to help me jun, don't get like this now!"
you're not sure how long it goes on for, but you swear you two laugh all night while on the phone.
"SO WHOSE THE GUY?" the question is asked so abruptly that at first, you assume you heard your friend wrong. when you look up, he stares at you with that deadpanned gaze, and that's when you realize he's completely serious. you chuckle at the realization that your friend is sure that your in love with someone (well you are— your just surprised that he figured out so quickly). "what guy? there's a guy?" you tilt your head, acting as if you have no idea what he could possibly be talking about. you giggle as you watch him slowly get even more irritated by your answer.
"you always come in here looking a little less miserable each day" chenle observes, leaning forward as he narrows his eyes at you. "someone is making you excited to live life?"
"do i always come in here looking miserable?" you ask, completely diverting your attention from chenle's previously asked question, which makes him pout.
"yep!" renjun exclaims, sitting beside you, he crosses his legs in his chair and presses his lips into a thin line. "so! who is he?"
the two seem way too excited to know about your never talked about before crush on dejun. now— you didn't know it was so obvious that you were now smitten for this new guy, you're usually the friend that's known from straying the furthest away from love, you don't remember any people you've legitimately liked that weren't elementary school crushes..
so yeah, your friends totally had every right to be surprised, because your absolutely smitten for a man and they just want to know who this man that is making you so happy is!
you hate that you give in so easily. "he's one of guanheng's friends.." you mutter, picking at your nails, looking down to make sure you don't witness renjun and chenle's reactions with your own two eyes.
renjun gasps, sounding like those ladies at the hair salons that just heard the juiciest gossip. "ooh! who? does he go here? do we know him? is he pretty?"
chenle looks over at renjun like he's crazy, that familiar judging stare in his eyes as he watches renjun lean closer to you with a totally not creepy smile on his face. "don't you think your acting a little too interested in this?"
"i just want to know!" renjun shouts, playfully glaring at the younger. he then turns back to you, and you assume his cheeks must be hurting from how hard he seems to be smiling. "tell me please?"
"he's— he's just your run of the mill pretty guy who is nice, and smart, and absolutely adorable who tells horrible jokes that still end up being funny in some way and he has a pretty laugh and i just love his voice, and talking to him, and, i can't even explain it because it'll sound stupid!"
"you sound like a psycho" chenle immediately says, laughing at you like you just confessed to an atrocious crime against humanity. you sink into your chair, slumping towards the side.
"aww! the pessimistic y/n is in love!" renjun squeals, again, like those women at the hair salon who just heard the juiciest gossip. he grabs your arm and shakes you vigorously, causing you to get dizzy in the slightest bit. "i can't believe i've lived to see this day!" he shouts, continuing to shake you as you can't properly get out your cries for help.
"renjun you're gonna kill him" chenle pinches the older in the arm, making him yelp and jump, he giggles as he witnesses the glare the older male sends him, his crushing grip remains around your arm, but you don't even mention at this point, because at least he's not shaking you anymore.
"sorry" he remarks, definitely not sorry as he squeezes your arm once again, beginning to get overly excited. "it's just.. exciting you know?"
"it's exciting that i'm in love with someone?" you raise an eyebrow, and though you expect renjun to respond, chenle quickly does.
"yep! you'll finally be gone!"
his cheer results in a gasp of offense from you, and all chenle does is giggle in victory.
THE ONE THING YOU'VE LEARNED FROM THE now excessive amounts of times you've hung around guanheng's other friends is that they're loud, they are all really loud (even sicheng! who, for a good majority of the time, is always quietly staring at his friends with clear concern in his eyes), even if they don't mean to, they're somehow always either yelling, shouting, or making some sort of scene. they're all just naturally hilarious, like comedians that don't realize they're comedians because they're just being themselves. in the past few weeks, it's like you spend more time with these people that don't go to your school in comparison to people that actually go to your school and that you can see easily.
but if you're being honest, you don't really mind that your spending all your free time with them, because they are indeed very fun to be around (and you get to see dejun much more regularly, which is something you rather enjoy), and because life would be insanely boring if guanheng didn't decide to drag you out of the dorm every other day to go do stupid things with his friends that go to a whole other school.
"you are such a cheater! i won fair and square!"
"you did not! your the cheater! sicheng is my witness!"
sicheng, who was not listening to anything either ten or yangyang had to say, looked over at the younger with a look of concern washed over his features. he blinks as he's suddenly put on the spot, smiling nervously as the youngest stares intensely at him, waiting for his answer. "uh.. i— i don't know".
his delivery makes you burst out laughing, and you cover your mouth with your hand as to not make yourself look like an absolute fool. you don't even realize that you picked up on one of dejun's habits, you might be spending too much time around him..
actually, forget that! there is no such thing as spending too much time around dejun, and that might make you sound like a "simp" but you don't care.
you've fallen, and you've fallen hard.
"okay.." guanheng presses his lips into a thin line, ignoring the way ten and yangyang now begin discussing the logistics of cheating in card games, unfortunately dragging poor sicheng into their argument. he turns to dejun and scoots closer to him. "can you do me a favor?"
dejun groans, playfully rolling his eyes. you assume he's done as much favors for guanheng as you have, and you barely stifle the snicker that dares to escape your lips.
dejun hears the sound, and smacks your arm hard, making you jump. he only gives you a teasing smile before turning to guanheng, having to give him a response.
"at what lengths do i have to go for this favor?"
guanheng scoffs, crossing his arms. "it's nothing insane or anything, i just want you to get me something.."
"and you can't get it yourself because..?"
"i have no money on me" and there goes that signature guanheng frown, dejun opens his mouth to argue but then he shuts it so quickly it seems like he just got out in some sort of trance.
"fine fine" dejun rolls his eyes once again, surrendering much too quickly. "you owe me though—"
"take y/n with you".
there's a pause, both you and dejun go very silent for a moment. whilst dejun is just confused, you absolutely know what guanheng is doing, and you have to use every bit of patience in your body to restrain yourself instead of jumping over the table and tackling him right then and there.
dejun is clearly clueless, though, because he just raises an eyebrow. "why?" he inquires, somehow sounding so sweet even though his question is asked with so much confusion.
"y/n knows what i want".
what a smooth lie, dejun glances over at you, and you just shrug, having no idea what more to say. "he needs to take a walk anyway" guanheng lies again, wow, two in a row! he's on a roll.
"okay..?"
so that's how you find yourself on a walk with the person that you are very much in love with, a somehow comfortable silence spread between the two of you as dejun hums an unfamiliar tune to himself, hands in his pockets, eyes closed as he slowly sways back and forth.
he looks very peaceful, just doing what he does, being effortlessly pretty as he does so, and you observe his behavior, almost entranced by it in a sense.
you only stop when he speaks up—
"do you think they're still arguing?" he suddenly asks, and you snap out of whatever daze you were having, praying that he totally didn't notice you admiring him like a creep. "or are they just.. conversing calmly now?"
you don't want to seem like even much more of a weirdo, but you feel like he asked that question just as an excuse to talk to you, and maybe your thinking too much into it, but you've definitely done that before, so you know what it looks like.
"i hope they aren't still arguing" you answer, and dejun looks up at you, smiling. "that'd be a long ass time to argue".
"well they like arguing just to argue" dejun replies, fiddling with his necklace. "but they're harmless.. for the most part".
his delivery makes you laugh, and you look down at your shoes. "you're a very calm person, you know, the opposite of guanheng".
the sudden statement from dejun makes you look up at him once again, and this time, he's staring directly at you, as if he had been waiting to make eye contact with you the whole time. "calm?"
"well compared to my roommates you are" he giggles, and maybe he doesn't mean to, but he stares at so intensely that your legs feel shaky.
"who knows? maybe i'm a fraud" you tease, purposefully leaning closer to him so your words have an effect. dejun's eyes widen, and he lightly leans away from you, looking speechless. "you'd never know, though".
you don't know how you suddenly got so bold, or why you were so amused at the sight of dejun freaking out, you feel like some sort of genius for what you just did, and you snicker at yourself before leaning back.
dejun takes in a deep breath, looking like he's trying to fix himself. he clears his throat and stumbles through his next words. "i— uh.. you're such an idiot!" he decides to say, crossing his arms over his chest.
your not sure how the two of you became so casual in this amount of time, a few weeks ago, dejun wasn't such a regular figure in your life, and you were just any other college student doing their best to get by, not thinking about falling in love with a gorgeous oreo–haired man—
but you're also not complaining.
you aren't sure how you got so lucky, how it just happened that you could continue to spend time with the cute boy you met at a stupid football game simply because the two of you shared mutual friends, it's one of times guanheng's actually done you a favor, without even realizing it too!
"okay i'm sorry" you giggle, shoving your hands into your pockets, you once again begin taking from dejun's habits and sway back and forth. "seriously!"
"you're unbelievable" dejun exaggerates, rolling his eyes, but it wasn't serious, and you knew it wasn't serious. "but i meant what i said, your calm".
you raise an eyebrow at him, wanting to know more about the observations he has about you. "could you elaborate on that?" you don't mean to laugh, but you do, and it causes dejun to laugh too.
"you just.. seem content with what you have" he explains, but he doesn't explain it enough, so he continues. "like someone could get you a piece of paper as a birthday gift and you'd be pleased".
you laugh, hard, because he somehow managed to get you spot on. you almost feel like he is reading your mind, because he nailed you down with each word. "really? i guess i am like that".
"ah, so my prediction was right then!"
you laugh at how glad he is. "yeah, i am truly not that hard to please, gifts are gifts and if someone gets one for me, there's no use in being mad if the gift isn't something i like, at least they remembered to get me something!"
dejun stares at you for a specifically long time, looking you up and down. he stares at you with warm eyes, a gaze that seems so near and dear to his heart, a gaze so loving that it looked like he was about to get down on one knee and propose to you.
"i like any and all gifts" you continue.
"are there any specific kinds of gifts you like?"
dejun asks that question in a tone that makes it seem like he's totally not trying to sound suspicious, but he is totally asking you that question for a very specific reason.
guanheng must've told him something..
at least, that's what you assume, but dejun is patiently waiting for your answer, and you can't daydream the whole time about the true meaning of his words.
"i like books, plushies, music tapes, vinyl's, you know.. regular gifts that people like receiving".
dejun hums, as if he's noting down the information you're telling him in his mind, still, you don't say anything about his mannerisms, just keep it to yourself.
"are you noting down my reply?"
"i'm just keeping it in mind!" he says, smiling brightly at you. "just in case your special occasion comes up and i don't know what to get you".
oh! so guanheng definitely did tell him something..
"i mean— were friends! any gift from you will be a good gift".
at the word friends, dejun seems to pause, cogs in his brains turning as he tries to process your words. you don't understand why he would be trying to understand your words, because the two of you were clearly friends, did he think you two were something else?
you see the flash of disappointment on his face, but it quickly reverts back to a smile and he simply acts like nothing happened. "sorry, the word 'friends' just caught me off guard".
a lie..
how interesting.
"seriously though, i just want to get you a gift you'll appreciate forever".
but you're already enough for me— do you know how much you've changed my life?
your own thoughts manage to surprise you, because the words that you just told yourself in your own mind startle you enough that you make a judging face at yourself. luckily, dejun is turned away from you, so he doesn't notice.
"well that's thoughtful of you".
"i try my best.." he responds, finally looking back at you with that same loving stare, one that wants to lure you in and make you trip on your own feet.
for some reason, the two of you stop. there's an uncharacteristically long pause, like the world just decided to cease for a moment, and you both are completely stuck in place, just there, staring at each other.
dejun's eyes move, as if scanning your face like a camera, and they (of course) stop at your lips. he stares at them for what seems like forever, and it almost looks like he's restraining himself, but by the way he bites his bottom lip, it's clear—
he wants to kiss you.
and maybe there's a small voice at the back of his head that tells him to cut it out, because he almost immediately snaps out of whatever daze he was having, and clears his throat, his cheeks going a bright red.
"uh— sorry, yeah, um, we should get going" he says, shaking his head as he pulls his sleeves down.
"guanheng will yell at us if we're late".
okay, so he just decides to not talk about it? you want to ask him why he didn't just do it, because he clearly wanted to, but before you can even open your mouth, or get any words out, he grabs your hand and the two of you continue walking back to the group.
he doesn't say anything more, doesn't try to make anymore small talk, and while you do want to bring up what just happened there, you don't.
you just bask in the feeling of dejun's hands intertwined with your own.
it's a good feeling, you decide.
THAT MOMENT IS STUCK ON YOUR MIND for what seems like years. you can't get over it! how he was looking at you, how he clearly wanted to kiss you, but for some reason, decided to stop himself from doing so. you're not sure why you didn't just tell him that it was okay, that you would be completely fine with him kissing you, but you guess that you're just a complete idiot as well, because you just stayed silent throughout the whole thing, the two of you equally deciding in silence to not bring it up, just sitting next to each other in awkwardly for the rest of the night.
and yeah, it's become normal for dejun to constantly run through your mind these days, it's like he has his own subsection in your mind, dedicated to thoughts about him and him only, but it's like he's just become rampant in there ever since that.. thing he did (or should you say, didn't do, considering he decided to not kiss you when the opportunity was right there), maybe you should've pulled him in, maybe you should've (for once) been impulsive and done the first thing put to your mind.
and this crawls through your mind for days, then those days become a good week and a half. now— you and dejun aren't not talking or anything, it was just sort of difficult to look at him without thinking about that.
you're so into your thoughts these days, that you are much more spacey during your classes, at home, and somehow, guanheng picks up on your weird turn, which is crazy, because guanheng was the last person you expected to notice something like that, he usually never notices most things in front of him anyway.
"okay, what the fuck happened?" he decides to randomly drop it on you when he seems to have had enough, which is funny, because he's technically the person that started the whole thing.
you look up from your phone, blinking at him like he just said something out of this world. "hm?" he scoffs at your lack of a response, shoving your shoulder, which results in a glare from you.
"what happened?" he asks again, this time without the extra swear word, he makes himself comfortable on the other side of the couch. "you are acting weird" he points at you accusingly, like you'd just been accused of a crime and he was trying to figure out if you were truly suspicious.
"i don't know what your talking about.."
"stop stalling!" he complains, grabbing your arm and beginning to shake you back and forth. "tell me! you can't keep acting weird and just not tell me what's wrong".
now you want to tell him, but in your mind it sounds so stupid that you feel like guanheng would laugh at you the moment you uttered the first few words of your sentence. "you're going to laugh".
guanheng gasps, offended by your response, though it is true, he just wants to be dramatic. "i won't! i'm concerned! i'm being a good roommate and asking you what's wrong!"
so, you roll your eyes, taking a deep breath. "okay so hypothetically.." you begin, because you have no other idea how to start your sentence.
hypothetically just means = it was indeed not hypothetical!
"hypothetically, uh huh.." guanheng hums, understanding the true meaning your words have. "okay sorry, continue".
"let's just say that, hypothetically, i am totally in love with one of your best friends, and that friend totally wanted to kiss me but then chickened out last minute and like an idiot i didn't say anything and i have no idea how to go about it".
guanheng's eyes widen at your words, and his jaw almost drops. "hypothetically though" you add to the end of your sentence after a long pause.
"right right! hypothetically.." he nods, though he can't contain his look of excitement at the words. "and you didn't kiss him back!?"
you're almost knocked off the chair from how intense his yell is. you groan and cover your face with your hands, embarrassed and ashamed. "i didn't know how to bring it up and not be awkward!"
"just say 'hey dejun you could totally kiss me and it'd be fine because we are both mortifyingly in love with each other'!" guanheng shouts, louder than his previous words. he's always so straight up, and you almost wish you didn't tell him anything. "it's that easy!"
"it is not!" you shout in rebuttal, crossing your arms and frowning. your acting like guanheng at this point, but that's not what you're noticing at this very moment. "it's easy for you! you date people and you kiss people all the time! i don't do that!"
"excuses excuses!"
you're at a loss for words at his lackluster words, you once again, frown and turn away from him. "i'm sorry! i have never been hardcore in love with someone like this before! i don't know how to talk about it!"
guanheng looks like he's about to yell again, but he takes a deep breath and relaxes himself, leaning back in the couch. "okay, i'm sorry for yelling.."
"y/n, you really just need to tell him how you feel straight up, because if you keep stalling than none of you will end up confessing in the end and you'll both just be going through a loop of 'should we or should we not?'"
you blink, staring at guanheng for a good few minutes, honestly surprised. this is probably the best advice he's ever given you, usually, you’re the one that has to give him advice because he always ends up doing something stupid and has someone that wants to murder him because of that stupid thing he did.
"that was actually.. good advice" you reply, laughing at guanheng's eye roll. he just shoves you, making sure he does extra hard this time to get his point across.
"shut up! i always give good advice!"
"you usually don't give any advice at all.." you mutter, running a hand through your hair as you look away from your roommate, who just glares at you like you just committed a federal offense.
"say something again and i'm gatekeeping dejun from you!"
"your what!?"
at the sound of your shout, guanheng giggles as he scurries away, proud of himself for the words that escape his lips.
YOU'RE NOT SURE HOW YOU SOMEHOW LET guanheng drag you off to a party on a friday night where all you wanted to do is relax. parties have never truly been your thing, but that's because being surrounded by a bunch of drunk and high adults just isn't your idea of fun, you're also just not a big drinker, so the only reason you usually even end up at parties is to take guanheng home when he gets too drunk and can't fully articulate his thoughts. so, the fact that guanheng was somehow able to convince you to get out of the house and go to a party when you truly should've been at home, watching horrible sitcoms.
but no, you're here! and you can't leave without guanheng because if you did, he'd probably find a way to end up killing himself, or he'd say the wrong thing to the wrong person and would end up getting punched in the face.
so you find yourself in a familiar spot, your back against a wall as you stare at your phone, somehow able to ignore the hundreds of screaming drunk people that surround you, it's become a skill of yours, and you're not sure how exactly it developed, you've just become such a natural when it comes to ignoring others.
guanheng, of course, has already walked off to do his own thing, but not before reminding you of the advice he'd given you a few days prior, yelling at you to 'just tell the boy you like him!'
maybe his advice is burned into your brain, because now all you wish is that you were with dejun, talking about something stupid, or just talking.
and there must've been somebody listening in on your thoughts, because he suddenly walks around the corner, head whipping around like he's searching for someone.
your not trying to look at him, but he catches your gaze immediately, and he skips towards you like a kid in a candy store.
"hi" he greets, a little giggle to his words. his face is a shade of bright red as he giggles once again, though nothing's funny. "pretty".
he whispers the last word, with the intention of you not hearing it, but his mind must be too clouded for him to realize that he said it much louder than he thought he did, but you don't say anything, just hum.
"hello" you greet back, and he laughs once again, covering his hand with his mouth. "are you okay?"
a loud snicker leaves his lips, and he moves closer to you to link his arm with yours. he rests his head onto your arm, a content smile spreading across his face. "i'm drunk".
his honest answer makes you question his state for a moment, since when do drunk people admit that they're drunk? or maybe he's only just tipsy.. your not sure, but he's not acting like a totally sober person right now.
"are you sure?" you raise an eyebrow, dejun just responds with a small 'hmph', and he keeps your arm linked with his. "dejun".
"yes! i am!" he yells as rebuttal, shaking your arm a few times. "do you wanna smell my breath?"
"oh no no no" you reply, covering his mouth with your hand. he laughs at you, his cheeks as pink as yangyang's hair, he grabs your hands, and whilst yours are cold, his are burning hot. "okay you have energy".
"i'm sorry" he suddenly blurts, another snort escaping his lips as he leans his head against your chest. you give him a look, confused as to why he felt the need to apologize.
"for what?"
"for doing that thing" dejun responds, closing his eyes as he sways back and forth. "i probably made everything awkward, i didn't mean to".
that's what he thinks? he thinks that he made everything awkward? you feel your heart break at the realization, but all dejun does is laugh sadly.
"you didn't— you didn't make everything awkward, it's okay".
dejun laughs again, clearing his throat. "just tell the truth, y/n.."
you chuckle, not at dejun, just at his words. he wants you to tell the truth? fine.. you will!
"dejun" you begin, using your pointer finger to tilt his chin up so the two of you make eye contact, you watch as his eyes widen, but he doesn't move, just lets you do your thing. "you can kiss me, it's okay".
he blinks, as if trying to figure out if you were lying or not. he opens his mouth, but no words come out, so he closes it again. "it is?" he asks again, just wanting reassurance, you hear his voice crack, but he's getting impatient, he wants your answer.
"yeah it's fine".
that's all the conformation dejun seems to need, because he finally presses his lips to yours after what seems like years of waiting. your arms naturally rest on his waist, and there's just something, something about this that makes you smile.
there's an urgency in the way he kisses you, and his hand comes up to hold your face. he is just so desperate, and it would be a lie to say that you weren't just as desperate as he is. you'd been wanting this for so long, you don't even know how many times you thought about what it would be like to kiss dejun.
his fingers caress your cheek, and the contact feels like your skin was set ablaze. maybe this is what you needed, and you assume it's exactly what dejun needed to, because he pushes on your shoulder with a seemingly inhumane amount of force, which makes you gasp a little.
while your one arm is around his waist, the other one goes up to run your fingers through his hair, somehow causing the two of you to both smile, barely stifling your laughs.
after what seems like forever, dejun pulls away, and while you're standing there, breathless, he just smiles, relaxing as you play with his hair. "you like my hair?"
you aren't sure why out of all things, that's what he decides to ask, but you laugh, completely enamored by the boy in front of you. "yep, it's soft" you reply, biting your inner cheek. "the color suits you".
dejun tilts his head, looking up at you with his insanely pretty eyes. you just want to squish his cheeks, or wrap him in a blanket and hold him forever, you aren't sure why you just have this surge of loving emotions for absolutely no reason, maybe it's the way he's staring at you, or that he just left you breathless and did it so flawlessly.
he hums, not knowing how to respond to your compliment. he just suddenly gets shy, his ears turning red at your words.
"you're so stupid.."
that's probably his favorite phrase to say to you by now, but you don't mind, you just smile as he hides his face away from you.
"dejun" you call out despite him being right in front of you, and he looks up at you again, gaze warm as he gives you a small smile.
"yes?"
"i love you" you immediately spout, not even surprised by how high your voice has gotten. "like— in the i'm in love with you kinda way and not in a i just want you to kiss you but not call you my boyfriend kinda way".
dejun pauses, snickering at your words, he looks at you like you're the only person in the world.
what other way could there possibly be?
but you don't get any response, at least, not from him, because all he does is lean forward and press his lips to yours.
YOU'VE NEVER REALLY BEEN A FAN OF YOUR BIRTHDAY, and you aren't sure why. it used to be a fun thing up until you turned twelve and it suddenly felt like a switch had flipped, as if your birthday was making you miserable. now it's not like you always feel depressed on your birthday, it's just that sometimes you don't want to have a huge birthday celebration. most of the time— you only request for huge birthday bashes on specific days, like when you turned ten (you were very excited about becoming a double–figured age), or when you turned eighteen (you became an adult, not that exciting but it was definitely something, you could finally legally drink), but it's truly only specific days that you don't mind having large, people–filled birthday parties.
and not only were you not exactly anticipating your birthday, you already had something even bigger on your mind the whole time.
like dejun ghosting you! that's definitely one!
okay so you tell the guy you love him, you make out with him at a party (in the opposite order but oh well), he doesn't give you a response and then he decides to just ignore you?
maybe he just didn't know what to say, and that also lead to him just not picking up his phone for a good two weeks as he completely ignored your calls and texts and voicemails!
and with this being the only thing on your mind, your birthday seemed to be the least important event at the moment.
you didn't really want to think about it, and the campus was starting to make you feel sick, so this year you planned on visiting your parents after the day was over, considering your special day fell on a friday—
but guanheng, guanheng had other plans.
he practically begged you to let him throw the party for you, he wanted to do it so bad that he vowed to never ask you for a favor ever again (which is a lie! he never keeps his promises!), he was acting so desperate, it was like you'd just saved his life or something.
you're not sure what made guanheng so eager to throw a party for you, especially because you just didn't know what you would do with a bunch of people in your dorm.
but he insisted, he would throw you the best party in the world.
and after what seemed like forever, you two finally agreed on something—
you go visit your parents friday evening, and guanheng throws your party on saturday, easy!
"what do you mean strawberry isn't a good flavor!?"
you scoff at his question, nodding your head, as if confirming your words. "i don't like strawberry flavored things, you get me a strawberry cake and i'm making you sleep outside".
your threat results in a gasp from your roommate, who looks genuinely hurt by your words as he places a hand on his chest, horrified. "you are such a horrible roommate! threatening me when i'm throwing a party for you".
"it'll be a horrible party if you get me a horribly flavored cake".
you totally mean what you say as well— you truly dislike strawberry cake.
and when guanheng said party, you didn't exactly anticipate how many people he would decide to let into your dorm.
now you know a good chunk of these people, but most of these people probably decided to come just because they knew guanheng, all they did was utter some happy birthday's and then they ran off to do their own thing.
guanheng got most things right, he just invited a bunch of people that really didn't care for your birthday, just wanted to be around him.
so it's no surprise that you felt just a little disappointed about the people at your party that just didn't give two shits about your actual birthday.
and guanheng was off doing something else, though you could actually see him this time, he was telling people where to put the gifts they brought for you.
your beginning to feel suffocated in your own dorm, which is ironic to you, because this is quite literally the place you go to get away from a bunch of people, it's the only place of yours that isn't full of people.
so, you clear your throat, and push through people to get to the door, not wanting to stay inside with all these people, you'll probably end up throwing up everywhere if you stay inside even longer.
when you exit the dorm, you take a deep breath the moment you close the door, letting your back fall against it. you immediately jump as you see a person behind the door—
okay so dejun (who you confessed your love to by the way!), is pacing back and forth in front of your door, totally stressing. you blink, a look of confusion spreading across your face. "um.."
"are you okay?"
you aren't even sure why you opened your mouth, but if you didn't, this would just go on for a good twenty more minutes.
dejun jumps, clearing his throat as he smiles awkwardly. "you— scared the shit out of me".
he's acting so casually? after not talking to you for a good two weeks!?
"sorry—"
"i'm sorry!"
dejun immediately yells, covering his face with his hands. "i'm so sorry for not texting you! or calling you! or giving you a response! it was so stupid of me to not consider your feelings and instead of just telling you straight up how i felt i decided to ignore you but i was scared that i wouldn't be able to tell you without making it awkward and it—"
"dejun" you place your hands on his shoulders, turning him around to face you. "your rambling".
he sighs, eyes darting away from your face, he frowns. "but it's not okay, i didn't talk to you, i probably came off as such an asshole! you were probably so confused, and i just.. said nothing!"
you observe his features, and he looks even more anxious at your silence. his face goes red, and his leg begins bouncing up and down, whilst his hands look for something to hold.
"okay, calm down.." you mutter, reaching for his left hand and lacing it together with yours. "it's okay, there's no need to be worried".
"i'm sorry" he says again, finally looking up at you. "i get it if you don't forgive me—"
"dejun" you cut into his sentence, squeezing his left hand. "i forgive you.. i love you".
you repeat your confession once more, and dejun blinks, processing your words.
"i love you too".
and finally, after what seems like forever, after what was so long, he gave you a response.
before you could say anything more, dejun pulls you in for a hug, his arms circling around your waist. you're a bit taken aback by the sudden display of affection, but you also don't mind, because he squeezes you tighter.
"happy birthday" he mumbles, a small smile coming to his face as he feels your hand comb through his hair. "i'm sorry".
"stop apologizing" you say, lifting his chin up so you could look him in the eyes. "i forgive you, it's okay".
and it is, you're being completely honest, but dejun doesn't say more, immediately pulling you back into a warm hug
but suddenly, the door to your dorm swings open and guanheng peaks his head out, eyes widening as he witnesses the current thing. he has absolutely no context to anything which was happening at the moment, he just opened the door to witness a totally unaware dejun hugging you.
"uh.." he blinks, glancing between you two, but not asking anything, just clearing his throat. "it's time to cut the cake?" he laughs awkwardly, and you just smile, giving him a i'll be right there look.
"o...kay" he doesn't say anything more, just goes back inside and closes the door.
dejun giggles as guanheng closes the door, pulling away again to look up at you. "oh he is totally tired of us".
"we didn't do anything, though".
dejun snickers, lightly hitting your arm. "okay okay, you need to stop, it's your birthday, you have to go cut your cake".
"and.." he pauses, pulling a box out of nowhere and handing it over to you. "open your gifts".
you raise an eyebrow, confused. "where were you even hiding that?"
"that's irrelevant! it's your birthday, come on!"
and you let him drag you back into your dorm, smiling at him the whole time.
YOU ALMOST CONSIDER THE WAY YOU are acting to be absurd, and it's funny how much of another side dejun can just bring out of you. now you would never consider yourself to be a grumpy person, but people usually do describe you as having a 'natural frown'. you never really thought of yourself as being like that, but you guess that people don't see you look so happy much, because they continue to point out how it's like some glitch in the matrix to see you just a little less miserable as each day passes. chenle especially makes comments, talking about how you need to "put your smile away" because not seeing your resting face constantly freaks him out, renjun on the other hand, is elated, or maybe he's just glad he can finally be rid of you, you don't know.
but all that put aside, you are happy, and you have a cute oreo–haired man to thank for that.
and maybe this is all you really need, just dejun, the two of you don't even have to do anything, he can just lay his head down onto your shoulder and you'd be having a good time.
you like it when he sits down and paints your nails for you, or when he watches you bake over your shoulder, not knowing what to do but happy to watch you do your thing, or when he coerces you to win prizes from carnival games for him with his absolutely adorable eyes (he doesn't even need to try to coerce you, you'd do it either way).
"i'm pretty sure this is illegal".
"it's not!" you reply, though you mean to reassure dejun, your words seem to worry him more than anything. you take his hand, squeezing it. "dejun, i'm not getting you into any illegal activity".
"i can never tell with you" he retorts suspiciously, keeping your hand in his as you lead him up, he would have tripped if not for you holding your hand and guiding you up.
you clear your throat, patting the spot beside you as dejun immediately sits, so close to you that your legs are touching. "if i ever wanted to do something illegal, i'd know better than to bring you along".
he gasps, and you can't resist the urge to laugh at how offended he sounds. "what is that supposed to mean!?"
"you" your pointer finger touches his nose, and he doesn't even try to move. "are a snitch, you would be horrible to commit a crime with".
dejun slaps your hand away, and you laugh at the way he crosses his arms, a familiar pout gracing his absolutely beautiful features. "you— i.. take that back!"
"it's true! even yangyang would be a better option than you!"
dejun is even more offended by the words, and he slowly scoots away from you, arms still crossed as he pouts. you giggle as he remains scooted away from you, still angry about the words you said.
"uh— jun, i was just joking!"
"you suck".
dejun glares, but his glare is anything but serious, as you can see the way he slowly starts to break under your gaze, resisting the urge to burst into laughter. "i hate you".
"you love me".
he does, and he can't pretend he doesn't, because he almost immediately snickers, looking away from you as to not laugh more.
oh he is just so adorable.
you scoot closer to him and wrap your arms around his waist, making him yelp. "you're so cute" you mutter into his shoulder, and at this point, dejun doesn't even try to pretend anymore.
"you're so corny" he says, patting your arms that currently circle around his waist. you lean your head down onto his shoulder, making yourself comfortable, and he just lets you, because at this point he can't really push you off him.
"don't fall asleep, i'm not going to carry you back to your place".
"you would be too weak to carry me anyway— ow!"
you yell loudly as dejun nudges you in the stomach with his elbow, and while he looks absolutely proud of himself, you just glare, absolutely done with him.
but you don't say anything, just lets your fingers run through his hair, probably your favorite thing to do with him. he just cups your face, and he just smiles at your face, giggling. "your just as cute as when we first met".
the statement makes you snicker, because you did not expect for him to say that out of all things he could've said. you get why he says it though, because you are at the place where it all began, the bleachers, the same bleachers where you two were standing when you shared your first interaction.
you tilt your head, wanting to tease him more. "so there were moments where i wasn't cute, then?"
dejun scoffs, turning away from you. he lightly pinches your arm, and you yelp once again, inching away from him. "why do you enjoy hurting me?"
he smiles innocently. "i don't, i have absolutely no idea what you're talking about!"
your face drops, and all dejun does is laugh, squeezing your cheeks. "don't be mad, babe, you know i love you".
and you do, you do know, he never fails to remind you of how much he does.
"i love you too.."
with your eye rolls, and tiny mutters, dejun knows, he knows that you're telling the truth.
#xiao dejun#xiaojun#nct#wayv#nct u#nct imagines#nct scenarios#nct drabbles#wayv imagines#wayv scenarios#wayv drabbles#nct x reader#nct x male reader#wayv x reader#wayv x male reader#xiaojun imagines#xiaojun x reader#xiaojun x male reader#𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!
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"Viva la Viva, baby!"
So guess who watched Trolls 3 today~
Ngl, based on the trailers I had really low expectations for this movie, and it was really only after watching some TikToks with the villain song in them that I decided to give it a chance, and I'm so glad I did. 3 is by far my favourite of the entire series. Was not expecting to love Viva, but she was fantastic and I wish we had more screen time with her!
While I'm not entirely sure how I will/would integrate her into the Rough and Fluff AU, I decided to make a design for her anyways, complete with some little headcanons/additions. (Click the image for better quality)
More spoilery/AU discussions and 4th movie predictions below!
Okay okay, movie discussion first:
-I fucking LOVE the Putt Putt Trolls. Its so satisfying seeing how the trauma from the bergens being more fleshed out, and it makes perfect sense that they are as fearful as they are. I'm actually surprised there wasn't more pushback when Viva stopped them from executing Bridget and Gristle.
-(How did they escape actually? The tunnels collapsed, but were there other tunnels? Or did they have a different way out? How did so many, including the eldest heir to the throne, get left behind? Why did Peppy not get BOTH his daughter's immediately?)
-On the topic of Viva; notice how her ears are lower/sharper than Poppy's? I think that's typically a more masculine trait (not 100% bc we see some male trolls with softer/rounder ears) so uh yeah MTF Viva real suck my entire nards
-Fuck King Peppy. This guy gets worse every movie. He is the Dumbledoor/Sensi Wu of Trolls. Mans cannot just give Poppy relevant information to save his LIFE. I can understand not telling Poppy immediately, the grief of loosing his eldest daughter would understandably make that hard, but its been over 20 years now, and she deserved to know.
-Also, fuck most of Branch's brothers! I'm glad JD went back eventually (when exactly he did isn't clear, but sometime between the night of the escape and the first movie) but if he assumed Branch had died, why not try and contact his other siblings to tell them? Clay I can kinda understand with him not wanting to venture out beyond the mini golf area and leave the trolls he was helping to protect, but the rest of them? Not one of them tried to go back for their baby brother? Not even Floyd? When Trollstice was a thing?? Branch shoulda thrown hands fr.
-Rhonda the armadillo bus thing was hella cute and I want a plushie.
-I. Do not really like Crimp
-Velvet and Veneer slayed sooooooo hard. I hope Veneer makes a comeback.
-I also hope we see more of the other troll tribes again.
-The music for this movie was absolutely fire and I NEED a full cover of Sweet Dreams
-I wish the Grandma's death was touched on more than once for like .5 seconds. Like, come on guys, your brother just revealed a major trauma, and that your GRANDMA died!! For christ sake, maybe go apologize for fighting?? maybe go comfort him????
Movie numero 4 predictions:
-Broppy marriage. Branch fr said "Lets get married" by accident HES THINKING ABOUT IT
-Either Poppy/Viva get their mom back, or Branch gets one/both of his parents. Dreamworks will pull some bullshit out of their ass and say that uhm actually they escaped like years before the others did and have been, idk, trapped in the shadow realm or something.
-We see Chef/Creek again. Creek redemption ark would go crazy hard IF DONE RIGHT and I want to see that fear of some monster trying to eat all your friends come back again
-Broppy kid reveal at the end of the movie. Unbelievable amounts of Plush Toy Marketing and terrible spin offs ensue.
-backstory/lore/backstory/lore/backstory/lore/BACK
-I just want to see more Trollstice era stuff plz dreamworks
-We get a Sound of Silence reprise
-Branch/his brothers are revealed to be a hybrid/some kind of special troll. I am TELLING YOU this guy adapted to different kinds of music like it was NOTHING, something Poppy and the others struggled with. Hes got something in him I SWEAR
-Tiny diamond is, once again, part of the main supporting characters
Au shiz:
-If Viva IS put in, its going to most likely be during the sequel. Peppy is already going to be dragged through the mud, might have him mention something about a lost sibling near the end of the OG fic, and since the Pop trolls will be looking for a new home, maybe they'll run into her
-Branch's brothers will not be making an appearance. They simply dont fit into the narrative. I may do an alternate au with them included but who knows.
-Mildly considering making Tiny Diamond a Greek kid. (Guy x Creek) would make for some interesting angst.
#trolls#trolls 3#trolls band together#trolls branch#trolls viva#trolls poppy#trolls king peppy#trolls rough and fluff au#trolls au#trolls 3 discussion#movie discussion#trolls veneer#trolls velvet
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What are their kinks? Their sexual intimacy? An overview of their sex life FS (18+ ONLY) PILE 3! (PART 2)
ORIGINAL POST HERE
Hello, my name is Viper and I am an intutive seer/oralce tarot reader. I am well versed in finding information through divination and using my intuition~ Today I wanted to do a spicy topic because its so fun. I haven't started explaining some piles and I already feel the heat. Damn, a lot of passion and fiery enegy in this reading.. Its making me horny LMFAO. THIS TOOK ME 2 DAYS AND I WAS NOT EXPECTING FOR IT TO TAKE THIS LONG. All three of these piles wanted me to do MORE DETAILS. My channeling DRAINED ME. That’s why I took so long because afterwards THEY SUCKED MY ENERGY. (Do not worry, I just received loads of messages. It gets overwhelming). Anyways, remember nothing is set in stone. This is for entertainment purposes only. NO MINORS. 18+ ONLY.
TW: MENTIONS OF KNIFE PLAY, and CHOKING. SEXUAL CONTENT!!
CHECK OUT MY SHOP AT: https://innerviper.etsy.com
I’ll be adding cheaper options in the future. I will be updating descriptions too, so SHOP WILL HAVE A NEW LOOK🔥.
They love giving though, this person is A GIVER. They want to do everything for you. Not only in bed. They are into edging too. They want to make you almost reach your high and then denying you for reaching it. I’m seeing that it’s either you or them that are into that. They also have a NICE BODY. Guys this person works out a ton. For the majority, your FS works out and has amazing care of their body. They also go at a stable pace in sex. So it’s not a rushed quickie or rushed sex at all. They need to take their time when doing it. Otherwise, it’s not good for them or at least not enjoyable. They may like to do it outside too (I think almost all piles were outside sex?💀). They also want to open your legs. I’m seeing they are into thighs and the leg area. They are extremely attractive. LIKE DAMN. They also have an attitude during the act. What I mean, is that they only want you. I’m getting and image as I channel this, they want to fuck you in front of people to assert dominance. They want to let the world know that you are theirs. This makes sense because this is where the community card comes through. Remember when I said they are into threesomes? This is where some conflict might appear for some of them. They are very selfish but they still fantasize about doing it with others. They are possessive too, they could use their anger out on you sexually. They use their anger as their sexual outlet. They have deep pent of anger. I’m seeing that they can get wild, when they just want to fuck you. Some of y’all might be into knife play/threatening. Seeing some choking in here too. I think you guys want to be choked by them? (DAMN THIS IS LUSTFUL FICJEJSI). When you meet them, you guys will have STRONG SEXULA TENSION. (It’s the most out of these piles). Their favorite positions could be seated oral (not really a position but yes), face sitting, and reverse cowgirl. Some other fantasy they have is someone having a vibrator in their underwear and them having the controller. (DAMN-). Some of them really like ass, they will love your butt. Ok, they really want me to go into more details.
AFTERCARE: They are pretty normal about it, nothing out of the norm. I see that it will be draining like an succubi/Incubi drains your energy after. So they will prefer to sleep.
Thank you for reading! Send suggestions and questions in the ask box!~
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JUNGKOOK GETS ROBBED -
[ot7 x reader]
one direction 😜
8 participants — 8 online
———————————
jin: don’t laugh but
y/n: laughing
jin: fuck you
hobi: but what?
jin: found a grey hair today
namjoon: young in spirit !
y/n: can i be on your will?
jungkook: still love you bro 💜
jimin: he cried for an hour
y/n: LMAO
jin: and you dare ask to be on my will ?
y/n: 🥰🥰🥰
jungkook: have you guys listened to the song mad at disney ?
tae: bye
hobi: …
namjoon: are you okay now jin?
jin: i knew you were my favourite for a reason namjoon !!!!
i’m ok … i’m coping i guess there is not much i can do
i’m just gonna sit here and accept death as it comes
just know namjoon your name is on first line in my will ❤️
namjoon: thanks?
jin: you are most welcome
tae: can i be visual now?
jin: no.
anyways y/n…
y/n: OMG ME FOR VISUAL JIN IM HONOURED 🙈🙈🙈
jin: again no.
yoongi: lol
jin: y/n i fear we are going to have to reproduce to save my bloodline and fill my gap in the group
y/n: YOU FEAR ???
jin: i mean ur not the best person to reproduce with…
y/n: what’s that supposed to mean ??
jin: i said what i said.
y/n: i’ll have you find i’m a GREAT person to reproduce with
jin: really?
y/n: really
jin: i’ll guess you’ll have to prove me wrong.
yoongi: gross
tae: omg wait… i’m dying too
y/n it’s the only way
save the kim bloodline
jungkook: im mad at disney disney
namjoon: bro…
jungkook: they tricked me tricked me 😔
y/n: jay park so ugly omg
hobi: i pass the mic pass the mic
jungkook: wtf don’t talk about my bff like that
jimin: BFF 😨⁉️
tae: god forbid…
yoongi: hell naw 😟
namjoon: oh
y/n: and that’s your problem….
always saying dumb shit that make me want to hit you
jin: did he not steal from you? or did someone make that up
jungkook: moving on lol
y/n: NO FUCKING WAYHXJXJDMFJCJKX
jimin: LMWOSOSOSO NOT HIM REALLY STEALING KNGSGHDNX
yoongi: LMAO
hobi: 😭😭😭😭😭
jungkook: it’s not even that funny it was an accident.
namjoon: what did he steal?
jungkook: just some headphones nothing major
namjoon: the studio ones?
jungkook: yeah he said he’ll bring them back they accidentally fell into this bag
yoongi: are you fucking dumb?
namjoon: did you get them back?
jungkook: he says been really busy lately
y/n: LNASKSOODODOFKCKDKCKCKX
hobi: wow…
jimin: you deserve it idc
tae: PLSNSJSJJXJDJXJXK
jin: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
jungkook: shut up
y/n: you ain’t never getting them shits back so sorry my love
yoongi: fr
jimin: i hate enhypen
y/n: omg ?!
tae: same lol
yoongi: who
hobi: fever fever fever
namjoon: what did they do to you?
hobi: love them
jimin: idk i just felt like being a hater
namjoon: ok??
y/n: sunoo is great
jimin: no fuck him
y/n: fuck you
hobi: do you think enhypen hates us?
jin: we are bts ofc they don’t tf
tae: true
namjoon: …
jin: what
sorry i didn’t lie
y/n: no comment.
yoongi: also no comment.
jin: also no comment
hobi: ???
namjoon: you made your comment already jin?
jin: no
namjoon: whatever
tae: i stand by what i said
jimin: i honestly couldn’t give a single fuck about what they think
y/n: omg who crawled up ur ass today
jimin: 🧍🏻♂️
yoongi: crazy
jungkook: i think we should give jay park a chance guys
jimin: bye.
tae: peace ✌🏼
y/n: …
hobi: out.
namjoon: tired of this bs
yoongi: 👋🏻
jin: bitch.
…
im back omg ???? this is literally just a draft that i never finished that’s why it sucks so bad 😭😭 freeing everything from my drafts so stay tuned for that !!!
#bts crack#bts fanfic#bts fic#bts text#bts imagines#bts x reader#ot7 imagine#ot7 x reader#bts jeon jungkook#bts fluff#bts x y/n#bts x you#imagine bts
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Encoder Zim, Ch 2, pt 3
Every. Single. Class.
Zim was in every. single. one. of his classes.
He shouldn’t have been surprised. He knew this was going to happen. Middle Skool hadn’t been much better; though at least then he and Zim didn’t have the same lunch. At least, not for the first half of the school year, anyway.
The last class of the day was PE. At first the class went over the weekly schedule; how they’d spend two days in the weight room and the other three in the gym proper.
Today, being the first official day for Freshmen, though, meant that an old staple came into play:
Dodgeball.
Dib hated dodgeball. Like always, he was picked close to last – some other unfortunate looking kid he didn’t know got picked after him.
Zim, of course, stood on the opposite team, teeth bared in a smile that could’ve doubled as a sneer in Dib’s direction. He already had a dodgeball in his hands. His blonde hair – which Dib knew was a wig; he’d seen the alien sans disguise before – already had that disheveled look to it that came with a day of activity.
(Dib hadn’t given Zim the satisfaction of commenting on his change in hair style – the longer Dib went without saying something about it, the more annoyed Zim seemed to get. For how tired Dib was, he’d take his wins where he could get them – even if that meant Zim grew more and more unhinged as the day went on.)
Dib wanted nothing more than to get his hands on a ball and smack Zim in the face with it. Unfortunately for him, his aim was typically fucking atrocious. It was everything Dib could do to stay in the game, usually.
The moment their overly muscled PE teacher blew the whistle, Dib did his best to keep away from the onslaught of dodgeballs. He dodged and threw himself around in weird ways, keeping his eyes on Zim all the while.
He knew Zim would cheat, somehow.
He always did. With those pak legs, usually – he’d “jump” up higher to get a better angle and to dodge Dib’s teams balls. With multiple balls in play, though, Dib knew he was likely to get his ass handed to him – Zim or no Zim on the opposite team.
The first hit nailed him on the side of his face, pushing his glasses painfully into the bridge of his nose. A second hit right after, catching him in the chest. The shoulder. His side as he tumbled to the ground.
Thank god none of them had managed to hit him in the crotch, this time. He rolled away from the chaos, sitting with the other kids who were also out for the duration of the game – until someone on their team actually caught a ball.
Which no one would, because of course – of course Zim’s team somehow had the vast majority of the balls, somehow. Dib sighed, taking his glasses off his face and rubbing at the bridge of his nose.
All in all, the game ended swiftly after that. Zim, unsurprisingly enough, was the last one standing on his team, cackling.
“I am ZIM!!” he shouted. “You all will bow down to ME, the dodgeball master!”
Dib rolled his eyes as he pushed himself off the ground. “Will you just – shut the fuck up for once?”
He hadn’t finished straightening himself out before his back was slammed against the matted gym wall. “What was that, Dib-worm?” Zim hissed, his hands – claws, really – digging into Dib’s threadbare gym shirt.
Dib sucked in a breath, his lungs seizing for a moment due to his impact against the wall. He lowered his gaze, meeting Zim’s glare full on. He was all but gnashing his teeth at Dib. With the blonde hair and the blue eyes that Dib knew were so, so incredibly fake, he really did look almost like a fourteen year old kid like Dib himself.
“Wait – have your eyes always been blue?” Dib sputtered, feeling his face burn as the other kids in their class began to chant FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.
Zim all but shrieked in frustration, his grip on Dib’s shirt tightening as he then pulled Dib off the wall and slammed him back against it once more – this time even harder than the first. “You notice my eyes but you say not a word about Zim’s BRILLIANT BLONDE HAIR?!”
Dib couldn’t help it.
He laughed. Cackled, really – and then his laughter dissolved into uncontrollable giggles.
“Are you fucking serious right now, Zim?” he managed. Through each round of giggles, Dib noticed how Zim’s remarkably human looking face flushed with some combination of anger and embarrassment. “I’m too fucking tired for this, man.”
Zim looked as though he were about to demand a further explanation – but before he could their teacher caught up with the commotion, pulling Zim off of Dib and yelling something about the two of them needing to take their personal issues elsewhere.
Dib, of course, took that moment to slip out of the gym and into the locker room. Maybe if he changed quickly enough he could get the fuck out of there and be on the way home before the final bell rang. Maybe, just maybe, he’d get lucky for once in his goddamn, miserable life, and –
“Where do you think you’re going, Dib-stink?” Zim growled, shoving at Dib’s bare fucking shoulder, because of course Zim followed him and of course Zim had no compunctions over touching Dib when he was in the middle of fucking changing.
“Home,” he answered, moving to put as much space between himself and Zim as he possibly could. He shoved his neutral face shirt back on before pulling his trench coat out of his gym locker. “Is that alright with you, your Majesty?”
He was so, so glad he’d changed out of his goofy ass sweatpants before changing his shirt. Trench coat on and book bag hooked over his shoulder, all Dib had to do was shove his feet back into his boots, and –
“Can’t go anywhere without these, can you, Dib?” Zim cackled, holding up said boots. He made a disgusted face. “Eughh – why do these smell so bad?”
Laughter broke out throughout the locker room, and Dib did his best to ignore it and the heat building up underneath the collar of his shirt. “They just need to be cleaned,” he said, his voice thin and reedy. “I didn’t get a chance to after – after last night.”
After he’d spent hours chasing Zim around the city. Hours he was regretting spending now, because his body ached with how tired he was. His first day in High Skool had been absolutely, incredibly fucking miserable, all thanks to the asshole standing in front of him.
Zim narrowed his eyes at Dib, then held Dib’s boots out as far as he could in Dib’s direction. Dib didn’t grumble thanks as he snatched them out of Zim’s realistic-but-fake-as-hell hands, settling on one of the benches in the locker room as he shoved his feet into his boots. He didn’t look up at Zim, either, as he began to lace them up, doing so as quickly as he could with how shaky his hands were, just then.
“I wish you’d just leave me alone, Zim,” he said as he straightened himself out, towering over the alien and relishing in the way Zim’s expression flattened out.
“Nonsense, you relish in Zim’s glorious attention!” he then said, as confidently as he’d normally say anything – but Dib could hear the undercurrent of doubt that lingered in his voice. Good. “You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself if I didn’t torment you every single day!”
Dib snorted at that, shoulder-checking Zim on his way past him. Zim, of course, followed him as they made their way out of the locker room. Somehow, Zim was already changed – he probably had his gym outfit as a separate disguise or something. It probably took him just the press of a button to change.
“I think it’s you who wouldn’t know what to fucking do with yourself if you didn’t torment me every single fucking day,” he said, once the two of them were finally, finally out of earshot from the rest of the kids in the locker room. He didn’t so much as look over at Zim; he could feel his presence to his left. Could feel Zim’s eyes on him, even, as they walked down the hall together. “I bet you can’t go a fucking month without saying shit to me. I bet it’d drive you insane.”
“I can absolutely go a month without talking to your disgusting humanness, Dib-boy,” Zim said with a sniff. “It would be a relief not to have to engage with your big-headedness for so long.”
Dib turned on his heel, crowding Zim against the hallway wall. “Then fucking prove it, space boy. Don’t fucking talk to me, taunt me, throw notes at me, message me – for a whole fucking month.”
Zim’s mouth hung open, his eyes widening for a moment before resolve overtook his features. He looked so human, and yet Dib knew he wasn’t. His blue eyes narrowed, and Dib tried to ignore the way his heart twisted in his chest as Zim spat, “Fine. Zim will leave the Dib alone for a month.”
Dib thrust his hand forward. “Shake on it,” he said as Zim jumped at Dib’s sudden movement.
Zim took a beat too long, looking between Dib’s hand and Dib’s face before sliding his hand inside Dib’s with a roll of his eyes. “Stupid human. A month is nothing to me.”
They shook on it. Dib did his best to ignore how he could feel the difference between the last two fingers of Zim’s hand and the three that he knew Zim actually had. “Your month starts now,” he said as he let go, turned on his heel, and marched right out of the school.
He smirked to himself as he heard Zim sputter indignantly behind him.
#invader Zim#Zim#dib membrane#ZADR#encoder Zim AU#this is the end of this chapter#we get three more chapters done and i'll start posting this mess on ao3#or something#but also good lord they're both so stupid#you can tell dib is tired because his cursing got so much worse by the end of the day#he's just so done with Zim y'all#so so done#lord help me
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Ok, so I know I'm totally just preaching to the choir on here, but I wanted to rant for a second and this is the only place I'm willing to do it, so-
Scrolling through the sad remains of Twitter today, I came across this post:
And I got super excited because I feel like I rarely see people flaunting their Asexuality like this (outside of the community here on Tumblr, that is), so I was just like "Oh fuck yeah, Ace rep!"
Then I made the mistake of scrolling through the comments... and that's really what this post is about, I just wanted a quick vent over some of the more repeated sentiments that I found.
(She responded to a few of them herself and I left in her responses, because yas queen, clap back at them!)
But anyway, quick tale of my experience as a bi-ace person: First and foremost, I think I look good/attractive/whatever and at times I do want to flaunt that because if I'm really feeling the way I look, why shouldn't I be encouraged to show off my muscles or wear a shirt that accentuates my boobs or pants that show off my ass? So yeah, I dress in a "sexual" manner from time to time, especially at pride where it lowkey feels like part of the point a lot of the time, and no, I'm not looking for any serial attention from that and yes, that is okay and normal and people need to stop acting like showing skin means you're some desperate whore (not that theres anything wrong with people who *are* hyper sexual in any way, Im just venting my own experience here).
Also, there were a lot of comments about why protection and rights matter for Ace people when at their most extreme they are A) not have sex and B) can basically go incognito in society and no one needs to know. But more complicated than that, isn't it? Because first of all, not all ace people are fully celibate (Im not) and all ace people I know personally still want to be in a relationship, just not necessarily a sexual one. In my case I got super lucky with my first major partner in that I was able to explain it to him and have him understand that I only get properly horny once in a blue moon, so if he wants sex, he needs to initiate and if Im really not feeling it at all, he needs to be okay with that. We were able to work out what the sexual part of our relationship would look like and things worked out, but, like I said, we were *lucky*.
And on the topic of commication and safety, that stuff is a two way street, it doesn't always help to be upfront about it. I have a friend who's fully non-sexual Ace and the first relationship they got into after feeling solid in that identity they *did* tell their partner right away that they're ace and explained that they're not interested in anything sexual at all and their partner responded by LYING and saying that he was fully non-sexual ace too, but then months into the relationship he tried to start shit and when she reminded him that she didn't want that he suddenly was talking about how they only think that because they've never had sex before, and they just need to change the medication they're taking because *thats* the cause and it's actually just religious trauma that makes her think she doesn't want it and he effectively tried to gaslight them into thinking they were straight when that is absolutley NOT the case and it's taken YEARS for them to feel solid in her identity again, not to mention start dating again (her current partner is lovely genuinely accepting and Im super happy for them)
So anyway, I just wanted to rant about this because it fucking SUCKS to constantly have people tell you that your too sexual to actually be ace or your unnatural for not wanting sex or your just confused or whatever and it can lead to genuinely horrifying situations of being forced into very uncomfortable situations because you're being gaslit by people who are supposed to and claim to love you.
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C is for Cyber Sex - Justin
A/N: Here is C! Without sharing spoilers I would like Justin to give Ricky a hard one to finish for D because of how this one ends and the competitiveness that the boys now have, so any suggestions I will gladly accept! Also the end of this had me giggling on the couch making my husband give me some major side eye! Sorry it is slightly shorter than the rest but it will make sense when you read it!
“Why did we agree to leave early in the morning and show up the day we perform again? This kind of sucks,” Ryan groans, “We haven’t done this shit in years.”
“Because we all wanted to be back home as soon as we could and this is the consensus we settled on, remember?” Chris asks, grabbing his suitcase from the baggage claim, getting tired of listening to Ryan and Vinny bitch about this.
“Could be worse I guess, at least we leave tomorrow morning and make it back home, that will be nice,” Justin says as he watches everyone bicker back and forth.
“Too bad for you that your letter falls for today dude, only idea that seemed to work was Cybersex which still isn’t that great but I couldn’t come up with that much you could do so far away.” Ryan shrugs, everyone making their way out to the van that was waiting for them to take them to their hotel so they can drop things off before making their way to the festival.
“You act like that isn’t something that is normal for us anyways, with our job that really isn’t that weird,” Justin says, climbing into the van to take a seat, ignoring everyone's prying eyes. “Oh you guys can’t tell me you’ve never video called or sent stuff to your girlfriends while we have been gone, we are gone at least half the fucking year.”
“Valid point, but no actually I haven’t done anything over facetime with Lottie, seems awkward to me,” Vinny says, looking out the window.
“Dude you accidentally sexted me once, so it’s not like you are completely innocent Vin,” Rick says shuddering. “I know we’ve all changed around each other but I am fine without seeing a photo of you like that again.”
Chris nearly spits out his coffee at this revelation, finding it absolutely hilarious that Vin did that to Rick one day, laughing his ass off from his seat.
They pull up to the hotel and drop their things off, Justin winds up rooming with Chris, which he figures could be worse. Chris usually stays pretty much in his own world so it isn’t like he is stuck with Vinny who would be up his ass after the show.
About an hour later after getting changed they all meet in the hotel lobby, ready to get going and figuring that their makeup will get done right before the meet and greet at the festival in their green room area.
When they all arrive that is just what happens, Angela getting to work on everyone's makeup except for Justin’s, he prefers to just do it himself and enjoys changing it up at the shows depending on his mood.
They all make their way through the meet and greet, they love getting to talk with all of the fans that they can meet, find out what the band means to them and how much they are loved for what they do. Justin unfortunately still feels out of place, being the newest member he still doesn’t get acknowledged as much as others do unfortunately but he still enjoys being there and hearing everything.
Afterwards they all sit around for a little bit until it is their turn to hit the stage, all of them making their way out to play in front of a huge crowd that is singing their hearts out and headbanging with them, all of them energized as they come back off the stage, truly loving what they get to do every day.
After leaving they all get back to the hotel, hyped up from the show.
“Hey, I heard this bar down the street has great food, do you guys want to wander down and grab dinner with me? I heard they have vegan options Chris,” Rick says, pulling his phone out to show everyone before they make their way down to their rooms to clean up themselves from the show.
“I think I will pass, I just want to chill in the room for a little bit,” Justin says, not really wanting to go out at the moment, ready to just hang out and relax for a little bit.
Everyone else agrees to go, which he silently is happy about as that gives him his chance to be alone to do this stupid challenge with you while the others are gone, he really wasn’t looking forward to having to hide in the bathroom while Chris was out there so this gives him his shot.
On Chris’ way out he turns towards Justin, “Don’t make too much a mess when you call Vanessa.” He winks at the other man as he walks out of the hotel room to meet the others, laughing on his way out.
Justin takes a minute to relax himself before he makes a facetime request with you, smiling when he sees you pick it up.
“Hey babe, how was the show today?” You ask, smiling at him through the phone screen.
“It was great, I love being up there and seeing everyone singing along with Chris and headbanging along, it is a lot of fun. Hey, I’m going to be straight forward because I won’t have a lot of time, Ryan gave me our letter and as expected it’s Cybersex because we are away from home. I got lucky and Chris went out to dinner so we have a window of time where I wouldn’t have to hide in the bathroom so….” He trails off, rubbing the back of his neck.
“So what? Tell me what you want me to do baby and I’ll do it,” you respond, no hesitation as you knew this was likely going to happen and you prepared yourself for it. “Want to see what I put on for you?” you ask shyly.
“Fuck, please,” Justin groans, moving to slide the sweatpants he changed into down his legs.
You smirk and slide your tank top off, showing that you were in his favorite black set of yours, the one that really makes your boobs look amazing. You take your time making a show of it as you prop your phone up and also slide your shorts off giving him a view of the matching panties that adorn you.
“Are you trying to kill me when I can’t touch you, fuck.” He groans out, almost instantly hard at the sight of you in his favorite through the screen. “Fuck, baby I want to see you touch yourself, pretend your fingers are mine as they slide up your thigh, teasing you.”
You do as he says, teasing yourself as you barely run your fingers up your thigh, slowly toying with the hem of your panties as you start to tease yourself. Smiling to yourself when you see him start to palm himself in his boxers as he watches you.
“Now what do you want me to do, tell me Justin please?” You beg, loving when he leads you along and takes charge, even when it's from a distance.
“Get the dildo I got you for when I’m gone out of the drawer, I want to watch you fuck yourself baby, please?” He groans, the thought alone getting to him as he patiently watches you pull it out of the drawer.
He watches as you tease yourself for a few seconds, making sure you get yourself wet before you sink it inside of you. The sight clearly visible to him from where you set your phone at as he watches, starting to stoke himself as he watches.
“Does that feel good baby?” he asks with a groan as you begin working it inside of you, he can see the sheen of your wetness on the toy as it goes in and out of yourself.
“Yes, but I wish it was you. You always feel better,” you let out a moan as you finish the sentence, getting a bit rougher with yourself as you can feel your orgasm building, watching him as he strokes himself a bit quicker.
“Are you imaging that it is me pounding inside of you, fucking you deep as you clench around me? Fuck I can’t wait to get home and fuck you myself,” he watches closely, the sight of you starting to fall apart in front of him really getting to him.
He is so distracted watching you that he doesn’t hear the door to the hotel room open.
“Hey the place was closed so we…. Oh fuck, shit I’m going to go to another room, sorry” Chris stammers out when he opens the door and sees that he walked in on Justin and you taking care of yourselves on camera by himself.
The second you hear his voice you panic, yanking the toy out and pulling a blanket from your bed over yourself as you see Justin quickly shuffle to cover himself up as well.
“Fuck, I thought we would have more time. I’m so sorry,” Justin stammers, embarrassed as he sees the look that is now on your face at the fact that Chris walked in on any of that. “I promise my phone wasn’t in a place that was visible so he didn’t see you.”
“It’s fine, you should probably go and calm yourself down before he comes back. Text me when shit is calmed down and figure out,” you say softly, not looking at the screen out of embarrassment.
“I love you, sorry baby.” Justin says softly, feeling awful when he sees how embarrassed you are.
“Love you too,” you respond before ending the call.
Justin takes a few minutes to let his hard on go down before messaging Chris to apologize and let him know that it is safe.
No shock to Justin everyone shows up when Chris comes back, all holding back grins when they do.
“Well we brought back some food for you from the place we stopped at instead if you want it… but I think you may be hungry for something else,” Vinny says, holding back a laugh as he teases his friend about getting caught literally with his pants down.
“Dude did either of you at least get lucky enough to finish before I got back?” Chris asks teasingly as he glances at his embarrassed friend and bandmate on the bed.
Ryan and Rick didn’t even try to hide their amusement, both laughing when Justin groans and answers no, annoyed that he not only got caught but he was also the first one to be unable to finish a letter.
“Yeah fuck off, can you guys go away so I can just go to bed? We can finish talking in the morning about what this means but for right now I am just done with this conversation,” Justin says, glaring at his friends.
The rest of the guys leave, leaving only Justin and Chris in the room as they get ready to go to sleep for the night, both pretty quiet.
“If it makes you feel slightly better Rick walked in on Mia and I one night, so it hasn’t only happened to you,” Chris says, holding his own laugh back as he tries to make his friend feel better.
“No it does not, goodnight,” Justin says as he shuts the last lamp off, sending you several texts apologizing before he shuts his phone off and goes to sleep for the night.
#motionless in white#motionless in white imagine#fanfiction#bree sucks at fanfiction#chris motionless#vinny mauro#ricky olson#ryan sitkowski#justin morrow#justin morrow smut#justin morrow fanfiction#justin morrow imagine#justin morrow x reader
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Very Long update!
hi to esteemed followers and (mostly) mutuals!
looks like i've done one of those things again where i leave my blog for months, convinced i'll never post anything again, only to return later with my art vastly improved. the only thing different this time is that i'm openly discussing it and not just quietly slipping an image onto someone's dash.
if you followed me for art - firstly, thank you kindly, secondly: how!? god some of this old stuff looks downright terrible!
and thirdly, you can expect at least some crumbs!.. unless i start forgetting to post again.
in my last personal update post i announced making this an "everything blog" which in hindsight was aributary because i still draw... mostly just greasers and psychobilly stuff with a few exceptions. i think when i posted that i was having one of my annual Vampire - the Masquerade fixations and expected most of my art to be centered around the game for much longer than it actually was. in the end, this remains The Blog of What I Was Gonna Draw Anyway.
i even actually got into making the comic i've been wanting to make forever (since like 2021 lol) and it's super exciting! i actually got the story kind of ironed out and i feel like i can maybe really stick to it this time? back then i constricted myself too much w composition and also just didn't have the skill to pull most of it off and now i actually can!!!!! i'm seriously surprisngly proud of myself! look at this compasion of march vs a few days ago!
march on the left new on the right lol
now into some actual personal stuff - mostly just because i seriously need to get this off my chest and for anyone interested in why i've been gone to get a little context, so tread the next couple paragraphs carefully as it is just a whole lot of complaining. unless you love reading internet strangers' woes it's not for you hahaha
things for me for the past couple of months aside from a few bright spots have been whatever the opposite of rock n' roll is (stand still and shuffle maybe.)
i graduated - obviously this was a lot of stress; i'm an animation major and crammed an about two and a half minute music video into a couple months, which was uhh hard. the band subsequently left me on read which i'm both mortified by and also can't blame them for cuz it did turn out ass. the entirety of my time after graduation was spent trying to find a job: as a non-citizen, getting into university didn't exactly seem in the books for me if i can't pay for it myself as i seriously didn't wanna put that additional stress on my parents. this was mostly fruitless as the job market is in the absolute crapper right now.
then i finally got covid after avoiding it for literally the entirely of the pandemic; the illness itself went surprisingly fine, but what came after is the actual disaster i live today. my immune system was completely destroyed and my chronic illnesses spiked. this caused me to lose the job that i did manage to get (let's go somehow below minimum wage!!!!) as i had an inflammation in my spine and was fired cuz i couldn't go into work.
right now my time is spent being sick ever since i got covid in august and also trying to get some documentation sorted. i need a citizenship and i need a disability status cuz if my health keeps on going this way i seriously can't see how i'll have a "real job" and even the measly hundred coin that the goverment can provide would be a massive help.
now this is where we circle back to one of the reasons this blog was started in the first place: being an immigrant really sucks! while yes, every day i'm grateful i'm here and not back there there are still some major fallbacks that can't exactly be ignored - mainly the fact that my current country may not want to let me in while my home country may not want to let me go. this is not something i have control over.
and speaking of my country, some big changes have been happening here that have definitely affected me hard. i mentioned in a previous textpost some long while ago that i'm no stranger to xenophobia and being stereotyped, and that has lately been blown way the hell out of proportion. PEOPLE ARE GETTING MEANER. PEOPLE ARE GETTING MORE CLOSE MINDED.
i don't really wanna disclose where i'm from in this post, i think i've mentioned it before, but if you're familiar you'll catch on.
yes, i understand this is an issue that affects all immigrants everywhere. yes i understand i'm super lucky to be where i am. but i am human and i can hurt and by god i am hurting right now. there's been a massive effort on my country's behalf to remove my first language from media; all schools that taught in my first language have been transformed to, well, not do that; there's a massive stained hole at the main train station where a sign in my first language was hanging. and i feel it. a child born here will no longer be of whatever family they belong to but they will be of the country and it hurts me.
again, i understand that this is a universal experience for migrants but to see it happen in real time is terrifying and absolutely discouraging. people see this change as a nice excuse to become absolutely horrible to those around them, and it's separating us instead of one country into two communities - "us" and "them," and i don't see the benefit. nobody i personally know sees the benefit, and yet somehow nobody who chooses to actually speak out on it seems to find this objectionable in any way at all - in fact, most outlets and spokespeople, whether they are from here or not, see this as a good thing, that those like me should just suck it up, "be more like them," that this is common sense. sure, in the vacuum of historic context, it might be, but we aren't living in history, we are living in the present and real people are affected and hurt by this. our great-great grandfathers don't give a shit. they're dead.
i'm alive and i breathe and i have a family i want to speak to and celebrate with in the way we are comfortable. i can keep moving, i can keep going, but i can't outrun my face which i feel gets more and more foreign the longer i look at it in the mirror.
all of the things above combined have been a massive strain on me psychologically and social media was seeeeeeriously the last thing on my mind. i gotta be honest i don't know WHAT force is holding me together rn but it's doing a damn good job because recently i actually started enjoying existence again. maybe it's cuz i learned not to be so depressed indoors; usually i couldn't go a few days without going outside without completely breaking down, but now sometimes i completely forget that going outside is something you Need To Do and just enjoy indoor hobbies. i know people usually say the opposite but i'm very sporty and active and enjoying being inside the whole day is kind of nuts. i've been loving my space more and more and i guess found a way to adapt my energetic nature to a constricting situation. i'm proud of myself for that too.
thanks for reading if you stuck it out this long and look forward to more drawings, hopefully.
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Bro the more I have to interact with this fandom (bc of work) the more I have absolute distain over it. You got people leaking your conversation without consent (making me sign NDAs n shit bro, not joking)
You got fuck ass idiots not reading and just pushing their own agendas onto other things even when told not to. Fans not respecting creators/others at all. Non credited reposts (on everything), blatant disrespect, people not being able to take anything either-
Fuck I was just shown earlier today that
A. Someone had an attempt because of me asking them to take things down without consent.
B. Someone telling me how I'm working with another individual that doesn't align with their beliefs. (Like who cares. Move on PLEASE.)
Everyone has their own boundaries set but goes ahead to purposely defile and break others in the name of 'justice'. When in the end it's really just a way to bully and harass others when you are different and don't conform to such.
I don't want to put culture into this but it's honestly funny with how as a Taiwanese, when I moved here to the states to study, they preach freedom to everything. But in the end, the only freedom I see is the freedom to hate anyone that isn't what the privileged prefer. In a lot more ways than one.
I have minors DNI too for this specific reason, and I still got problems because people sometimes fuck up! That's fine! I'm just asking things to be solved, but I didn't ask to be involved in any opinions or feelings getting hurt. The facts are in front of you, we take it or not, we move on, done.
We're also acting like I've ever been hiding about anything, I'm openly blunt, queer, chronically burn out and depressed all the time, if you have a problem, you can talk to me directly. No need to go behind my back since I'll find out anyways.
Anyways, this sucks, it's impressive how a buncha bozos could make something I loved with all my heart and ruin in without even realizing it or giving a damn. I'm trying to provide and make this a fun space for people who like the show, who like the work, and who like what is being created, I really am. But it's hard when a big part of the majority act like this, it's like no one understands normal etiquette anymore.
Also just know that every time y'all call the aliens by the wrong name, the less hope and sanity I have over this shitty fandom. (Which is unfortunately majority).
#damn Ive never ranted#guess theres a first for everything#rottmnt#yall suck lmao#keep up the good work and ill be giving you guys an actual halloween scare
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I watched seven seasons of vampire diaries well half of season 7 .. close enough.
. Caroline /Katherine Pierce were my fav girls. . caroline had a major glow up/ plus her hating DAMON is valid and its so shitty she had to apolgize for tlaking shit about him in s4 cause elena was sirebonded and it made her upset.. s1 elena would never..
Katherine was just fun.. and intriquing your left wondering does she care about anyoen but herself? i think she did like stefan.. and him giving her a happy dying dream was very sweet no wonder she want stefan.. He's a nice guy at his core.
Stefan/Tyler were my fav boys. I really liked Stefan when he embraced vampirism too he was fun.. and from what i saw of paul thats actually closer to pauls snarky personality ..
Stefan/elena now him stalking her creepy as shit.. butohwell
i think they were actually close to Girl can fix boy but done better than delena for the 3 seasons.. i think elena brought out the best in stefan while damon brought out the worse in elena.. plus what the heck was the sire bond about? thats not epic love that just weird. .
delena maybe could work if he hadn't kill her brother.. but .. sometimes.. i got sib vibes from them. whenhe wasn't beeing creepy anyway.. but he also never really respected her choices or her boundaries .
i felt the writers kept him grom growing too..
as much as i detested damon he got so many good JOKES.. I met a squirel he asked me my name today i told him it was joe that lie will haunt me forever. ..
adored him with Bonnie Ian/Kat chemistry was amazing its acutally interesting knowing he dated nina they broke up and boy did it show in the show cause the chemistry died down after that break up ..
least fav was ENZO im glad STEFAN killed him but im annoyed he was dating Bonnie cause when did he even talk to bonnie? plus he was just so annoying with how he kept trying to ruin stefans life ..
bonnie had the best chemistry with damon and the Heretics i was rather bummed they killed off the lesbian herietics. .. julie/caroline plec suck so those ships could never happened.. cause bonnie/one of the lesbian girls i forget her name but i rem thinking i dig this chemistry with them..
julie/caroline these two women were def living through delena the way they treated it as epic l explains why it was so bad
.. what interview with vampire got right was how to write toxic romantic relationships vd got it so wrong. it also helps louie was 33 a full ass adult man so its not creepy vamps flirting with teenagers.. i learned the guy playing matt was shitty to kat so thats a bummer cause i did enjoy matt/caroline for what it was.. and the alaric guy i heard him talk in intervies and he gives me the creeps.. but how he mentions the idea of dating bonnie.. i wonder if he pitched alaric dating caroline. either way whoever came up with that ship is a FREAK.. cause.. That's HER TEACHER/ Elenas sorta Father figure 40 year old 17 year old .. no thank you.
Stefan/caroline could have possibly worked but it felt like stelena 2.0 .. i did vibe with their joker/harley no humanity plot for a bit.. i
shipped matt/caroline/caroline tyler/ now klaus .. he like killstyler/ nearly killed caroline/ drowned tylers mom i dont think it was ic for her to have anything more than maybe Pity for the lonely hybrid.. and i dont mind them as friendish.. but man how tyler/caroline end is bogus and ooc ...
..id say after ep 3 of s4 elena is also ooc because of that damn sire bond..
the show is best ended at s4 ep 1 but i was a glutton for punishment i went on till s7..
#vampire diaries#rambles#stefan salvatore#damon salvatore#caroline forbes#klaus mikaelson#elena gilbert#katherine pierce#anti delena
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ohhhhhhhhhhhhh guys. i have HILARIOUS updates for you from today. warning this post will be rambly but it has some hits and i think if im not your favorite character in life i really should be. ok
OKAY. so it all starts with a dream. i dream that ruby cruz is on my campus shooting smth and long story short she approaches me at one point, as shes abt to say smth my one friend pops in like 'oh hey is this your girl?' meaning FILM GIRL. and everything morphs in that moment like a fucking comical nightmare and im like What No except it was... and okay anyway. i didnt sleep a lot and this is the first dream mention of her in a while. well get this.
spot her on campus as lydia and i r fucking RUSHING bc not one but TWO buses passed us. im like huh first spotting of the semester odd time but ok.... meanwhile i just have this dread so ancient in me because she also has her film major so at any point i can be jumpscared. it wasnt even that real genuinely im at a point where im like ok that shit was fucking stupid and i shouldnt have gone thru all that so she sucks but whatever. anywho we rush into class late with the bESTTTTTTT prof <33333333 im settling im sat im figuring out the space. im sitting at the front however with lydia so like i take a little while to do some glimpses around the class... well get this!
yeah shes there. and im kind of like. sigh. okay whatever. lydias staring at me like Hey so um....... and im like Yeah im aware i know. but i see so many other film people i know to varying degrees so thats cool!!!! im like yippeee also my prof keeps referring to me directly so im like heyyyyyyyyyyy queen <3 esp bc she has like legit aphantasia and i didnt even participate That Much last year but it gets crazier! we're going through attendance and who's directly behind me but abby lee miller! jk um it's my friend im kind of having a flirty little moment with maybe? idfk so im like redactedddd what r u doing hereeeee. and theyre also well aware of the drama we bonded talking shit.
so yeah imagine being me. psychologically attacked every step of the way. except it's lowkey really fun and silly i was having a funny time. i had to laugh! and talked to people and it was fine. but also everyone knows each other to varying degrees and so im sitting there feeling like im being slowly cooked alive. in a fun way...
but also we watched joan is awful in class and the prof was telling us about how you can do it to your face and have a poster (except then netflix can use ur face!) and she singles out '[film girl] is awful' out of everyoneeeeeeee so i had to giggle i had to laugh like without knowing anything my prof is such an ally to me personally fucking love her <3 she also had an association with her and frankie grande and i was like yeah. make her gayappropriatingstraightbi ass uncomfortable. anyway.
and then also. sigh hello lydia if ur seeing this. i try to introduce lydia and that friend and after the typical introduction i was like 'yeah cool i mean ive talked to you about each other at various points!' like girl why would you say something like that. like huh. neither of them says anything and i save it by bringing up our bottoms plans but i was just sitting there in my own goddamn mind control room like yeah ok. girlfailureloser moment. why are you WEIRD. it's not even that real actually im awkward frequently and people roll with it but just given the energy of everything going on in class it was a really great way to end. and then we talked to that prof for a While after class she's literally the best she would do numbers on here. within the cool lesbian mutuals space anyway and thats all that matters. and we talked about bottoms !!!!!<33333 and willow and shes like yeah ok dyke in the most affectionate way i can possibly say that i love herrrrrr
#abby talks#im being tested.#but also im having a lot of fun and i feel really like comfortable and chill and happy to feel like i have support yk#u cant get me down when im in my element Bitch.
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