#to stay true to character it's more about 'what was the situation' and 'what Aziraphale thought of it'

[tenok]

Well I won't say that Aziraphale was horrified at thought of kiling a child, he was mostly sitting there arguing that he shouldn't be the one doing the killing (he does cleary dislike the idea), which is a little different (and btw I rewatched that scene for this and wow, first of all how cinematografically great first season are, it hits hard, and second it's a small thing but him immediatly jumping from "I don't want to do the kiling" to "what if we go to his party and prevent hound from happening" — that's such a great moment usually overlooked, but it's on par with "I will try to talk with higher ups" and his other desisions in the way how he never gives up and always tries to think of several other possibilities, even when Crowley already lost hope. Just, chef kiss), and while he dislikes it and was willing to find his way around this, as soon as he set his mind on this track and up to the moment of shooting he was working fast and clever on finding his way to kill this child without much remorse. In no way I say this as a way to critisize him, no, I actually think it' great example of how he deals with using violence: he will try to find the other way, but if there's no other options? He will use it, will use it cleverly, and he won't be sorry much. That's just part of his tool chest, not his favorite, but not something he swears off forever. And it's sexy of him.

But other than that I think it's a matter of perspectives. I don't like overly sweet, soft and innocent portrayal of Aziraphale that you can usually find in fics that's more kind to Aziraphale, I think that he's much more deep and has a better understanding of the world that people gave him credit for and he's much more in peace with some darker thing in himself and others. I also think his softness can be a shield hiding this things not only from others but from him too: like in kilind Adam example, when he doesn't want to think of killing a child, he immediatly jumps to "maybe I can do tricks as a magician :)" which doesn't mean that kiling a child still doesn't a possibility he still considered, that he doesn't still think about it on more deep level, accepting and getting ready, but on surface level? He's into his silly mode. The same with looking for a clues in season two: he's so eager to play detective so he can stop thinking about Gabriel, heavens and hell for a second and calm down. I'm not saying that he isn't naturally sweet and easy to get exited person, but I do think that calm, collected person person aware of horrors and his capability of using violence as much of beauty of the world and his capability to find joy in every litte thing is much more correct portrayal of him than "always cheery and never willing to hurt anyone and being bastard only in sense that sometimes he says something jokingly sexual to Crowley" I usually see.

Now, sorry, I completely derailed post that was about Azirahale trowing fists lol

And about describing him as masculine, I kinda understand what you mean and yes him going into fights can be example of this I'm sure, but I'll say that it's more complex. See, first and foremost, the global problem is that fandom as a whole for now favours Crowley, so all povs, deep reflection and other cool things usually go to him (the quality if this reflection is another thing, god save us from character's haters and character's protectors). And any thing that can be actually deep and meaningfull would be botched if written without considering what's inside character's head, be this fighting/violence/masculitinity/etc! And another thing is that while yes Aziraphale is feminie, he's actually really, really masculine too. He does. It's pretty significant thing. Like, we saw Crowley passing as women a least once, two if you counting Golgotha, and Aziraphale always passed as man. Queer man, gay man. He's not feminie per se, he's utilizing his masculinity in feminie way. He's not wearing a skirt (although I'm sure he can and would if he will consider it proper [the same with violence lol]), he wear a pastel suit. He keeps his hair fluffy, but not long. He does his manicure, he also goes to specifically male's barber to pay him for treatment of his hair and non-existent beard (I suppose, since he's used "barber" and not "hairdresser" but it can also be translation thing). His mannerisms are not women's, it's a gay man thing (or neurodivergence thing). And people... they actually don't know what to do with healthy, non-conventional masculinity and how to explore it. They can play with queering the gender, putting Crowley in skirts and make up and changing pronouns on a whim, they can do one of them or both womens, but people stuck on making masculinity interesting and specifically queer masculinity not… cringe, I suppose? Like, to write Aziraphale beng his *pansy* self and not making this a bad sitcom episode can be challenging, and also some people probably avoid this without even thinking because it can feel disrespectful to write character this way. So it's kinds interesting that people make Crowley this *cool rebellious genderqueer punk* but rarely explore this side of Aziraphale at all.

There's other thing in play, like people loving dichotomies so if Crowley more feminie than Aziraphale should be more masculine, or people just wanting a trope with strong daddy ravaging helpless twink (you can find the same with top!Crowley and bottom!Aziraphale, but less after season two, much less /unfortunate sigh/). But, anyway, I'm derailing again and my point was that Aziraphale's fighting is just a part of bigger... I don't want to call it issue? It's not that deep you know. Fandom shift?

Anyway thank's for listening to me rambling! In conclusion, Aziraphale should be allowed to beat people up when he feels like this, but he should be granted with big pretty flowr crown immediatly later, because he's a softie and we love him for that

Look I think I said it before somewhere but I need to talk about it again.

Aziraphale (in the show - his characterization differs in the book and I’m talking about show Aziraphale here) is a soft character. He started out as a soldier and he made the conscious decision to give the sword away to someone who would use it for protection, instead of keeping it to fight (leaving out the whole thing about War owning it later on cause that’s a different topic and definitely wasn’t what Aziraphale had in mind when giving away the sword). He also makes a conscious decision to look and act as non-threatening as possible, instead deciding to look soft and huggable and gay as hell a tree full of monkeys on nitrogen oxide. We don’t see him fighting anybody even when he gets the sword back - he just holds it and swings it around a little, he doesn’t even lift it when they face Satan (I think. I’d have to go back and watch again but I’m fairly sure he just stands in the background behind Adam with the tip of the sword facing the ground).

We know, or at least suspect from the scene where he fixes the hole in the wall that he’s physically strong and we know he’s still technically a soldier in Heavens eyes (Gabriel going „you’re a lean mean fighting machine“ and him having and possibly leading a platoon in Heaven) but he fully rejects that position in episode five to go back to Earth. He doesn’t want to be a soldier at all. He’s still a protector, we see this in season two with Jimbriel (he literally says „I said I would protect you and I will), but even THEN he doesn’t physically fight the demons entering the bookshop (he lights the circle but it’s Maggie and Nina throwing fire extinguishers and encyclopedias).

I know we as the fandom love badass Aziraphale. I love badass Aziraphale as well. I take a little bit of an issue with how him actually being badass is portrayed in fanfic sometimes because a lot of trying to make him physically fight demons comes across as trying to make him more masculine, more fit, less the campy, soft, kind character that he is and it annoys me. (A part of that is also how people try to make him more like Crowley, which I don’t like the undertones of either but that’s a whole different topic.) Both because I don’t like the implication that to make him badass you have to change that part of his character and because we’ve seen him being badass in the show already and it was either a) trying to protect humans/Crowley/Jimbriel, which involved a lot more threatening that him actually throwing hands or on one occasion b) him being bitchy (Furfur pronouncing his name wrong). It was him being kind and caring about people and their lives! And possibly their reading skills.

And I know there’s a lot of hope for more badass Aziraphale in season three, because hell yeah, Heaven getting obliterated from the inside? Absolutely. But when we get to see BAMF Aziraphale in season three (because I don’t doubt we will, in some form or other) I’d much rather see him be badass by outsmarting Heaven (magic tricks anybody?) and getting away with it or threatening the Metatron or whatever than by punching somebody in the face. And IF he does have to use physical violence, then I want there to be a reason for it and I want it to be portrayed as a bad thing. Like I want I to be the absolutely lowest point of the character because we know how much he detests doing it and he hates having to do it anyways.

In that case also want it to end with the Metatron dead in a ditch.

[indigovigilance]

Sodom and Gomorrah: A Speculative Meta

on Ao3: Sodom and Gomorrah: A Speculative Meta

Sodom and Gomorrah is the story of a land so steeped in sin that many prayed to God for intercession, and God sent two angels to see for themselves if the rumors were true, and determine based on their testimony whether the cities should be destroyed.

In Season 1, we learn that Sandolphon was there, doing a lot of smiting and turning people into salt. The way that Aziraphale talks about it, we are led to believe that he was there too, bearing unhappy witness to the destruction, his plastered-on smile faltering as his vision fades into the middle distance:

In this meta I am taking an alternate stance to the wonderfully presented interpretation by @queerfables in my speculation of what happened in Sodom and its relevance to the GO story arc overall, if canonized. I hope that readers will consider the merits of both arguments in their own formulations of Aziraphale and Heaven in the GO universe.

TW: discussions of homophobia, sexual assault, death & destruction

Verses are taken from this translation of Genesis, chapters 18 and 19.

Genesis 18

20 Then the Lord said, “The outcry against Sodom and Gomorrah is so great and their sin so grievous

21 that I will go down and see if what they have done is as bad as the outcry that has reached me. If not, I will know.”

(Notably, the allegations made against Sodom and Gomorrah are never discussed. It is simply left at “sin so grievous.” Though it seems like there may be more information in Genesis 12)

But God herself did not go down to Sodom, instead sending two angels. I, like queerfables, read this and quickly came to the conclusion that for GO narrative purposes, the two angels that God sent to Sodom were Aziraphale and Sandolphon, where the former is playing tour guide to the latter, who has the real authority in the situation.

Upon arrival, the angels are met by Lot; he invites them to stay with him. At first they refuse, saying they will stay in the square, but he insists.

Genesis 19

4 Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom—both young and old—surrounded the house. 

5 They called to Lot, “Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we may know [have sex with] them.”

There is a lot of baggage to unpack from these two lines, especially in the 2023 context of politics in the Western hemisphere. Same-sex marriage is nearly ubiquitous, a near turnaround from only twenty years ago, but so is homophobic rhetoric, and the story of Sodom and Gomorrah is cited a lot for those purposes. Intersectional communities of faith have done a lot of work to try to reinterpret these two verses, insisting that what God finds so abhorrent about the actions of the men of Sodom is not that they are homosexual but rather that they are attempting to gang-rape two newly arrived strangers in their city.

For the real world, this is a very important discussion and a solid position to maintain, if one wishes to defend the concept of a benevolent God who made homosexual, bisexual, transgender, and every other flavor of human as lovingly and intentionally as was made every cisgender heterosexual person.

But we’re not talking about real-world God. We’re talking about the God in Good Omens. And She is not a very nice person. 

We have only to look at the contract that would allow the murder and then replacement of Job’s children, or the abject poverty under which Elspeth suffers that forces her to commit [apparent] atrocities, and ultimately drive her to attempt suicide. Whatever your feelings may be about the God of our shared meatspace, the God of Good Omens is not a character we are meant to admire, sympathize with, or make excuses for.

Returning to Sodom in the Good Omens universe.

I propose that it is thematically in keeping that the men of Sodom were not attempting to commit gangrape, but rather, they saw Sandolphon and fell in love on the spot. Because yes, Aziraphale is a fine scholarly-looking fellow, but it’s approximately 2000 B.C., the Bronze Age. Sodom and Gomorrah are most likely agrarian societies, and Sandolphon looks like he could throw a bale of hay like a javelin. He’s a whole lot of man, and the men of Sodom are into it. I mean, c'mon, Paul Chahidi in some biblical garb, is, uhh...

...not an eyesore, iykwim. [image source: imdb.com]

So they go to Lot’s house and ask if they can see this man, in hopes that they can ask him on a date. They are smitten by Sandolphon. Sure, the ultimate goal may be to have sex with them, but not right there on Lot’s doorstep, and the gross misquoting can be attributed to Sandolphon’s own libelous report of events, not to the Sodomites themselves. History is written by the victors, after all.

While we’re at it, let’s consider Lot’s response:

Genesis 19

6 Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him 

7 and said, “No, my friends. Don’t do this wicked thing. 

8 Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don’t do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof.”

In the true spirit of Good Omens comedy, I can envision Lot walking out among these men, complaining that not one of them has asked permission to court or marry either of his daughters of maritable age, and perhaps rather than simping for his houseguest, perhaps they would consider dating one of them instead. Is it homophobic? Sure, but I’m not here to defend Lot; he doesn’t need it. Because standing next to Sandolphon, he’s an absolute poppet.

(The remaining stanzas regarding the Sodomites breaking into Lot’s house, I am going to selectively set aside and chalk that up to Sandolphon blowing some Sodomite choice statements about Lot being a homophobic asshole way out of proportion.)

Sandolphon, a True Believer, is not about to stand for this insult to his heavenly purity. Angels do not have relations with humans, and to insinuate that he would even consider it is blasphemy. He takes it as a personal insult that the Sodomites would propose such a thing. He finds this to be evidence enough that the Sodomites are truly corrupt and worthy of destruction.

I feel the need to emphasize here that while this contains some distinctly queer themes, Sandolphon is not angry because they are men; he is angry because they are human, a different species from himself (in the same way that angels are different species from demons), and furthermore that anything resembling love the way humans do it is disgusting and vile to him.

Aziraphale, meanwhile, is standing helplessly on the sidelines, desperately trying and failing to de-escalate the situation. But it’s no use, Sandolphon has already made up his mind. There’s nothing left for Aziraphale to do but to try to save as many people as he can, beginning with Lot and his family.

Genesis 19

12 The two [angels] said to Lot, “Do you have anyone else here—sons-in-law, sons or daughters, or anyone else in the city who belongs to you? Get them out of here, 

13 because we are going to destroy this place. The outcry to the Lord against its people is so great that he has sent us to destroy it.”

Again, in the fashion that GO takes liberty with biblical narrative, I propose that it is Aziraphale alone who warns Lot that Sandolphon will destroy Sodom come sunrise, and sends him out into the night to gather his family and get them out as quickly as possible. I propose, additionally, that Aziraphale is the one who leads Lot and his daughters by the hand out of Sodom and then protects the village of Zoar from destruction so that they can take shelter there.

Genesis 19:

15 With the coming of dawn, the angels urged Lot, saying, “Hurry! Take your wife and your two daughters who are here, or you will be swept away when the city is punished.”

16 When he hesitated, the [angels] grasped his hand and the hands of his wife and of his two daughters and led them safely out of the city, for the Lord was merciful to them.

17 As soon as they had brought them out, one of them said, “Flee for your lives! Don’t look back, and don’t stop anywhere in the plain! Flee to the mountains or you will be swept away!”

18 But Lot said to them, “No, my lords,[or singular, lord] please! 

19 Your[singular] servant has found favor in your[singular] eyes, and you[singular] have shown great kindness to me in sparing my life. But I can’t flee to the mountains; this disaster will overtake me, and I’ll die. 

20 Look, here is a town near enough to run to, and it is small. Let me flee to it—it is very small, isn’t it? Then my life will be spared.”

21 He said to him, “Very well, I will grant this request too; I will not overthrow the town you speak of. 

22 But flee there quickly, because I cannot do anything until you reach it.” (That is why the town was called Zoar.[“small”])

While yes, this is a fictional interpretation of a biblical scripture, let’s take something from the fact that Lot is supposed to be addressing two angels, but the pronouns he uses to do so are all singular in the original Hebrew: that is to say, it seems like he is only talking to one angel. So in the victor-edited retrospective, the story is written to seem like two angels were rescuing him, but from the faithfully quoted words of his own mouth, it was only one. It seems like Sandolphon tried to write himself in as one of the good guys but couldn't bring himself to actually change the words that were coming from Lot's mouth. (Again, this is unnecessary work to do for the biblical narrative to be molded to a GO narrative, but it is an interesting feature of the original text nonetheless.)

At sunrise, the destruction begins: 

Genesis 19

23 By the time Lot reached Zoar, the sun had risen over the land.

24 Then the Lord rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and Gomorrah—from the Lord out of the heavens.

25 Thus [S]he overthrew those cities and the entire plain, destroying all those living in the cities—and also the vegetation in the land. 

26 But Lot’s wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt.

So goes the story of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah: The cities are slandered before God, who sends Aziraphale and Sandolphon to investigate; Sandolphon is so incensed by human men flirting with him that he determines that the city shall be destroyed in the morning, and Aziraphale races against the clock to save as many as he can, knowing that he cannot save everyone. He bears witness as the men who resemble himself so much, who committed no greater crime than to seek out a forbidden love, perish in a rain of fire and brimstone. He must feign heavenly delight that a sinful blight was erased from the world, while mourning thousands of lost souls. He wonders if they have been sent to Hell. Even Lot’s wife, whose only crime was to question, to wonder what is behind her and perhaps regret leaving it behind, is turned to salt. He sees the vicious glee of Sandolphon exacting his revenge for the crime of impugning his celestial celibacy. He wonders what Sandolphon would do to him if he ever found out about the stirrings in his heart for a demon who, 500 years prior, had sat beside him on a rock, looking out over sea, comforting him as he nursed his wounded faith. He wonders just how far along with Heaven he can go, and what the consequences will be when he dares to say, “I will go no further.”

~~~

[image source: Wessex Archaeology]

For those who (like me) are interested, the story of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah seems to have been merged from two historical events, which was common in a period preserved primarily by oral history. The tale seems to resemble a volcanic event that occurred nearby and around that time, but Sodom and Gomorrah were most likely destroyed by an earthquake and a subsequent flood, since they were located in the Jordan Plain, the lowest dry land in the world, a full quarter of a mile below sea level at its lowest, and very near the Dead Sea. Additionally, the area is rich in bitumen, sulfur-rich near-surface petroleum deposits that, when disturbed by a major earthquake, may have sent hot tar flying into the air, which if it landed on anything flammable would give the impression that fire and brimstone were raining down.

✨ the more you know ✨

~~~

Blending together the biblical canon and archaeological speculation, I'm going to make a wild, unsubstantiated proposal that Crowley turns the people of Sodom into fish so that they survive the flood. Because one biblical flood was enough, and he'd heard around the water cooler that She had promised not to do that again (lying liar). This creates a tentative connection with the raining fish we see in the title credits of both seasons, and I'm also going to reference it in an upcoming meta.

[downthepub]

Something that I love about this season of Good Omens, but am not quite sure how to articulate, is the way characters who don't understand the context clues are treated. Like even when that's used to keep them in the dark, it's never treated as something mockable or stupid (except perhaps by Metatron!).

Gabriel's amnesia makes him not know anything, and so things have to be explained to him. He has to be wrangled, to protect himself and others, but he's not "stupid" just because he doesn't know things.

Shax needs tone explained and constantly has things about Earth and human culture that she doesn't understand. Even when Crowley is exasperated and doesn't feel like explaining, he doesn't seem to think that makes Shax stupid, or less dangerous, or anything else.

And then we have Muriel being *really bad* at her scripted "human" interactions, but it seems like the only person who really looks down on her for that is Metatron.

And of course there's Aziraphale with his incredibly literal reading of situations and people and what's true and what's not true. It is a very rigid binary. And obviously even social injustice is just part of the ineffable plan and an opportunity for people to rise to the challenge! He believes what he is told, and when he finds out something isn't true, it's a big adjustment for him. He can stretch it and make his own choices about right and wrong, and he reads situations much better with more experience under his belt, but there's still a part of him that absolutely believes what he's told, at least in that first moment. And the truth is really important to him. Like Crowley lying to him, he knows and needs to reassure himself that it's a lie, and he also keeps trying to get Crowley to affirm that. (You're really good, etc.)

And even with all their experience, neither Aziraphale nor Crowley seem to grasp that relationship issues for Nina and Maggie could have something more to do with outside things than just about what the two of them could / should / might feel. Love is a simple 1+1=2 that they never question. Obviously humans fall in love, that's what they do! The fact that one of them is already in a partnership, the other one has forced herself to accept that and not act inappropriately, well it simply doesn't register on their radar. Somehow they've missed this complexity of human interaction that would be clear to most people at a glance. I don't think they're actually dismissing the lived experiences of Nina and Maggie or trying to ride roughshod over their lives as much as it simply doesn't even register to either of them that things are more complex than they currently understand. It really does need to be explained for them to begin to understand.

Then there's the poor guy who has to keep asking questions because something *doesn't make sense* or isn't consistent, even though he gets punished for speaking up, over and over.

So, to me, many (most?) angels and demons are basically coded as being on-the-spectrum, IMO. It's nice to have that not be the butt of the joke, just part of the humor and cultural clash and conflict. For instance how Muriel is not a "stupid low-level angel" to Azriphale and Crowley, but more like "a dangerous, if currently ignorant, problem we have to stay ahead of." Even when they're tricking Muriel it's feels more respectful and humane than when Metatron acts like she's just stupid (even though she's useful to him).

I don't quite know where I'm heading with this but I love seeing it. It's like a breath of fresh air to have characters who are absolutely missing the "normal" cues, and not have that simple fact overshadow everything else about them.

[sandraharissa]

Ok but here's the thing, Aziraphale's kinda right about wanting to 'fix Crowley'. Let me explain.

In S1 Crowley's clearly lost and confused, there's his relationship with his plants and the prayer scene. I thought this conflict might have been considered put to bed but in his very first scene this season Crowley complains, similarly to S1, 'what's the point of all this?'. He's clearly troubled and damaged by his fall, that 'he only ever asked questions' (he clearly craves to understand why he fell), that the plan is ineffable and who knows why things are happening and what'll happen next, that he stands to lose his creations/what he loves just bcos, and predictably averting the apocalypse in itself didn't solve any of these.

This season he talks about not wanting to disturb the fragile peaceful existence they carved out for themselves, and in contrary to heavenly manipulations, hell likely just straight up tortured him in the past like when he gets sucked into hell this season for doing a good thing, AND he has a more rounded understanding of the situation, having had experience with both heaven and hell, so Crowley is acutely aware how dangerous the world is and how much he can lose, including that even just wanting to save what you love gets you in trouble with both sides. Let's not forget him thinking for a hot second in S1 that Aziraphale got destroyed with hellfire and then experiencing Aziraphale's execution for him. Crowley's clearly very troubled and if Aziraphale sees this, then he's not wrong.

I think what's happening here is that this early on a fix is presented that's not the true solution and so it's rejected. Aziraphale tries to fix his trauma by essentially just going back in time and acting like it never happened. It's easy, aligns with Aziraphale's other beliefs (like that it's good to be on the side of heaven) and on the surface level reversing/undoing the traumatic event that's the source of everything should fix everything, right?

Well obvs that's a false belief, it's trying to erase the problem rather than solve it, there is no going back but I think this also points out that there's no staying in one place either. That's the way in which Aziraphale's right. "Nothing lasts forever". Crowley's a character who carved out this fragile peaceful existence for himself and he's gonna do everything to not change anything about it out of fear of losing it, that's part of why I think he seems ok with just pining for eternity as long as they get to keep what they already have. So that's a character who's very averse to change/progress in his relationship and character arc.

His attachment to Aziraphale is smth he wants and it's very valid, good for him, but obvs a romantic relationship isn't gonna make his existential crisis disappear, which is the other big thing about his character apart from his relationship with Aziraphale. So there's something else that he needs first, and idk what it is but it's definitely got something to do with moving forward and it's definitely not going back to being an angel again.

[kaelyx-zac01]

Hot take: Crowley and Aziraphale are aromantic.

Okay, look, I get it. I'm pretty much sure the majority consensus concerning the nature of Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship is romantic. And I have nothing against it. In fact, I enjoy viewing them as a romantic couple. I know the significance of the nightingale song and its lyrics (although I still think it still applies even if Aziraphale and Crowley's relationship is alterous or platonic). And, given the ending, it really adds a certain pain when you know that they are both romantically into each other. And yet, character flaws and forces around them hinder them from getting together, something that we all have been hoping to see since the beginning.

HOWEVER, I would argue that viewing their relationship as a platonic or alterous bond between two aromantic, asexual, agender beings makes more sense and creates a different depth to their relationship. For starters, they are angels (well Crowley's a former angel). And, as hammered throughout the second season, they seem quite unsure about how human romantic love actually works --- a shared aromantic experience, honestly. We may know that it happens or understand the scenarios that can spark said attraction. After all, we see them in fiction and real-life stories. But, we don't really GET it, y'know.

Remember Nina and Crowley's conversation about him and Aziraphale being romantic partners? Crowley denies, of course. I don't think he has never seen their relationship as romantic. But, he knows they have a deep and intimate bond. And this conversation leads him to rethink his relationship with Aziraphale, hence his concerned look after their conversation.

First off, he cares about Aziraphale. Deeply. He can't see a future without them. Aziraphale is the only being he can be himself with these past 6000 years -- the only one who made him forget how lonely it is to be a demon who just goes along with Hell as far as he can. Aziraphale --- a bastard worth knowing and liking. Their partner. The only one who saw the goodness beneath the cool demon bad boy facade they've had for all these years. Without a doubt, he loves him. Is it romantic or not, who knows? But, he loves him. And he's worried about losing them, especially as he involves himself with Gabriel.

Now, fast forward to the end of the whole Gabriel-Beelzebub affair. Metatron comes in and speaks with Aziraphale. He's worried about them of course. But, more importantly, something bubbles inside him. Seeing Gabriel and Beelzebub choose each other reflects how he feels about Aziraphale. Because for the last 6000 years, this demon has been choosing Aziraphale time and time again. Aziraphale may be a bit hesitant at first to accept how bonded they are. But, for Crowley, his side is with Aziraphale --- always have and always will. And in his heart, he's hoping that Aziraphale confirms that he feels the same. And with Nina and Maggie's talk about how he should share his true thoughts, he gains the courage to let his bubbling feelings spill out for the first time in millennia.

And then, Aziraphale brings up Heaven's offer. He pushes through with his confession with all vulnerability he has to offer, hoping desperately that his feelings will push Aziraphale to choose him. But, Aziraphale still chooses his former side. "Nothing lasts forever", Aziraphale says and Crowley took that and applied it to their 6000 year-bond, evidently breaking his heart. Thus, as a desperate plea to make him stay and convey how much he loves him, he does what he's seen humans do in similar situations -- he kisses him . He and Aziraphale love humanity, understand humanity in a way. And here, Crowley uses it to convey how much Aziraphale meant to him.

And yes, I know it can be seen as a desperate romantic gesture, that Crowley's been suppressing his romantic feelings all this time and pours out 6000 years worth of romantic pining in one kiss as a way to tempt him to stay. I've seen people talk about how the kiss reframes or starts the transition of their relationship from a platonic to a romantic one. And although perfectly acceptable explanations, for me, it feels lacking. Worse, it also undermines how deep and meaningful platonic or alterous love can be -- that it isn't possible for them to be "just" friends since they are each other's special person.

I think it feels more accurate and meaningful to think of it in an aromantic perspective. Do they get the human romantic attraction and feelings behind kisses? Probably not. But, do they get that humans kiss the people who mean a lot to them, the person they love? Yes. And that shared understanding of humanity becomes a shared language they can communicate with. The kiss becomes more meaningful as Crowley uses it to express the depth of love he feels for Aziraphale in a way only the both of them can understand. Which makes it MORE painful when Aziraphale continues to reject him nonetheless.

In the end, Good Omens is a love story. The depth of their love is evident from the way they look at each other to how they look out for another. However, I just don't think it's a romantic one. I get how it can be interpreted as such. But, personally, given they are angels, I honestly find it more plausible for them to be aromantic: two aroace idiots who deeply love and care for one another. I can't wait to see what Neil Gaiman has in store for them

[skiptomyylu]

People seem to gloss over everything in the conversation up until the kiss and Aziraphale saying "I forgive you". They keep talking about "what Aziraphale did to Crowley"

So...

Clearly energy and anger is going to the completely wrong place....

The part people seem to be mad about is the I guess rejection?

Okay...for the sake of this blog post let's all pretend that the rejection is the issue here..

Let's look at the Final Fifteen from the eyes of the people who think like this

Ahem...let's see if this sounds correct to you

[Start Scene]

This is Aziraphale and he used to work for the Heaven. Now that the Archangel Gabriel has gone off to pursue a life with his one true love, Heaven (who has FUNDAMENTAL ISSUES they refuse to acknowledge) is left without a Supreme Archangel to help carry out Heavens' big plans.

As it stands, since Aziraphale knows so much about Earth, he is Heavens most valuable asset and is best suited to be Supreme Archangel. The Metatron wants him no matter what because without him Heaven can't prevail. And he'd do anything necessary for Heavens Sake...

So the Metatron comes down and uses everything he knows about Aziraphale against him and every manipulation tactic he can to coerce and almost bribe Aziraphale into coming back.

So Aziraphale runs back to tell Crowley about this AMAZING opportunity-

Oh...Crowley is confessing...awwww

Why isn't Aziraphale wanting to stay with him?? Why does he want to go to Heaven?! It's not like anyone MANIPULATED him into wanting to go or something! (Sarcasm) Aziraphale WHY?! YOU'RE STARTING TO SEEM LIKE THE BAD GUY!

OH MY SOMEONE THEY KISSED!

....He said I forgive you... GRRRRR I HATE AZIRAPHALE 😡😡 HE NEEDS TO FLUTTER DOWN FROM HEAVEN RIGHT NOW AND DO THE APOLOGY DANCE BECAUSE HE HURT CROWLEEEEYY! AND MEEEEE! 😡😡😡😡

[End Scene]

....Do you see how this sounds incorrect?

Do you see how this doesn't make sense?

Aziraphale has been coerced and manipulated into returning to Heaven with the love of his life and what were focused on is him "rejecting" Crowley?

First of all- no.

He did not reject Crowley. He was pleading for Crowley to stay by his side in Heaven and make a difference with him. And Aziraphale was CERTAINLY not "choosing the Angel Crowley over the Demon Crowley" like people have been saying. Aziraphale has the HIGHEST perception of Crowley and sees him as kind! Aziraphale isn't saying "I want the old you" he's saying "I want to bring you back to the status you TRULY deserve since you are kinder and more caring than ANY other Angel I've seen."

Can we please stop acting like Aziraphale stomped Crowley out and, kicked him to the side, and then spat on him?

He was acting as he was puppeteered to act! And even then he didn't WANT to leave Crowley behind! Finally, we know Heaven is terrible but Aziraphale isn't going there to do things the way they're doing things! He's going there to MAKE. A. DIFFERENCE. To make things RIGHT! To stop earth from being nearly obliterated again! To stop Angels like the Archangels from acting like they're better than everyone else! To FIX THE FUNDAMENTAL ISSUES!

Step into Aziraphales shoes, use the dramatic irony* you've been gifted as an audience and THINK!

(*Dramatic Irony is when the audience knows something the characters dont just yet. The character being Aziraphale, what we know is that Metatron manipulated him)

And for SOMEONES sake stop saying he needs to "apology dance" because it's honestly ruining the dance as a whole! It's meant to be funny and a silly little thing between friends! A silly little teehee! Doing a stupid embarrassing dancing and singing a silly little song! Do not apply it to a situation where they need to COMMUNICATE!

I'm pretty sure it was *checks notes* the Metatron who ruined everything and did this to Crowley and the fandom.

But by all means let's blame everything on the angel who has repeatedly risked his life to try to stop him and is now going back to heaven to try to bring about a universe where he and Crowley can be safe together.

Also, hasn't the fandom repeatedly been over the fact that the apology dance is not an adequate substitute for real, open, healthy conversation and really shouldn't be used in serious situations where there are genuine hurt feelings happening?

[ineffable-endearments]

I appreciate the adaptation change from Crowley deciding to stick around and save the world because he had “nothing left to lose” to him deciding to stand and fight because Aziraphale invoked their relationship.

It’s not just because I’m a shipper (although lol that’s definitely part of it) - it’s because I feel like the book passage emphasized a slightly more cynical point of view, having “nothing left to lose,” whereas the show has a slightly more idealistic twist, emphasizing more definitively what Crowley DOES care about even in his deepest despair, when he’s all but positive that nothing is going to work out.

If you look at the situations carefully, they are probably more similar than different at their core. After all, Crowley being persuaded by Aziraphale that he has nothing left to lose by staying and fighting for Earth is just another way to express that Crowley has already invested all of himself in this world, which is fundamentally the same thing. It’s a sign of a good adaptation.

But I’d argue that they are framed differently, and framing means something to me. I’m sure some people would complain that it weakens Crowley’s character to have him more invested in Aziraphale specifically than in the abstract idea of “the world,” but I’d argue that Aziraphale symbolizes all the things that have made Earth a place where Crowley belongs and is Crowley’s original connection to the world. In a moment when Crowley is overwhelmed by existential terror, it makes sense that instead of considering abstract, logical concepts like responsibility and the fate of the human race, Aziraphale’s would be the voice that would get through to him. But his is still the voice of the world, relative to Crowley. And that’s true in both versions, but in the show, the connection to caring seems more obvious to me.

It kind of takes it from “you’ve already lost everything so you may as well go down swinging” to “no, there are things you will always care about and they ARE worth fighting for whether you succeed or not.”

[creepy-crawley-crowley]

The Glasses ~ Crowley X Reader

Sah dude. Hi. Hello. Greetings and Salutations, I am your local Crowley dealer, and this is your first delivery. Reblogs are greatly appreciated, as are requests. Send some in, please. Anyway.

I tried to keep this gender neutral too!

Warnings: Angst, kinda, and out of character characters lmao

Crowley liked to think that he was a tough guy, a heartless demon with a soft spot for two people. One, an Angel, and the other, a human with a soft spot for snakes. It just so happened that Crowley was very snakelike.

Said human actually had a snake, too, a White Lipped Python. (Crowley would never admit it, but he was jealous) The snake was, in fact, called Slither. Slither! Who called a snake Slither!

But that's besides the point.

Crowley was heading to Y/N's house, to reveal what he really was. He drove in his black Bentley, 'Somebody To Love' by Queen blasting as loudly as it could, and he pulled up outside, and wasn't surprised to find Y/N tending to the garden that resided outside their house.

Upon hearing the Bentley, Y/N turned around, hair slightly messier than usual, and smiled.

"Crowley! I wasn't expecting to see you here, what are you up too?" Y/N asked happily, wandering to the car. Crowley smiled slightly, adjusting his glasses.

"Come on, get in. I'm taking you on a trip." Crowley watched as Y/N got in, slightly confused. They sat next to him, and raised an eyebrow, shutting the door.

Crowley hit the pedal, and off they went.

They stopped near a small cottage, in the countryside, where Crowley and Aziraphale had decided to retreat to after the whole Armageddidn't situation. Not that Y/N knew about that. Crowley got out, and Y/N followed, and they both walked up to a field, and Y/N smiled slightly upon seeing a picnic set up.

"Crow, what are you up too?" Y/N asked, chuckling. Crowley looked at the ground, and smiled softly, a rare thing from him.

"It's a picnic." He stated, sitting down, and patting the spot next to him. Y/N sat, and picked up an apple. Crowley chuckled. Ironic. "I need to tell you something." He mumbled, mood suddenly switching. Y/N sensed the mood change instantly.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing serious, don't worry. I just...need to tell you something." Crowley looked at Y/N from behind his glasses. "I'm gonna...I'm gonna take my glasses off. Promise me you won't run." He sounded weak...desperate...human.

"I promise." Y/N held out a pinky, and Crowley blankly stared at it. Y/N smiled faintly. "It's a pinky promise...never mind. But, I promise."

Crowley nodded, and his hands came up, ready to take off the darned shades, ready to let Y/N know who, and what he truly was, ready for Y/N to scream, and run to Aziraphale. Nobody could ever be scared of him, after all.

But he couldn't. His hands shook wildly, like his plants, as they grasped his glasses. Y/N watched patiently, their eyes observant. Taking in detail. And still, Crowley struggled on.

"Crowley...can I?" Y/N asked quietly, gesturing to his glasses. Crowley froze, surprised, and then blinked slowly. He then nodded, and up came Y/N's hands, they gently rose, and their fingers rested on the frame for a moment, and Crowley's breathing became quick and heavy.

He almost felt...scared.

Before he could stop it, a strangled noise came from his throat and he flinched backwards, eyes shut tightly even though his glasses hadn't come off. Y/N frowned.

"You don't have to, Crowley, it's okay." Y/N said gently, but Crowley shook his head, keep going, please, keep going. Y/N understood what he meant, and sighed, attempting to remove the glasses again, moving slowly, cautiously, and gradually, little by little, off came the glasses.

But the eyes stayed shut. And that was okay, Y/N wasn't angry, how could they be? If Crowley needed a moment then he would get that moment.

Crowley's eyes opened, and Y/N gasped softly, but didn't scream. Didn't run. Didn't cry. Y/N did the opposite.

"Crowley. Look at me, please." Y/N said ever so softly. "Crowley, please don't be scared." Gentle hands cupped his cheeks, and Crowley unintentionally leant into the soft touch. "What are you, Crowley?" Crowley almost whimpered at the question. He'd never felt so vulnerable.

"I'm a Demon." Crowley whispered, and Y/N nodded. "No, seriously, I'm a Demon. I-I have wings, and I can do things." Crowley added, and Y/N merely nodded.

"Okay. That's okay."

Crowley frowned, bringing his wings out. "I'm serious." He repeated, and Y/N tilted their head to one side.

"Okay. Can...can I touch them?" Y/N asked, and much to their surprise, Crowley nodded.

Now, Crowley had never been fond of physical contact. One could even say he'd never been touched, which was not true, he'd been touched a few times. But maybe that person meant something else, who knows?

So when careful fingers touched the top of Crowley's wings, he flinched away. Y/N was patient, and waited for Crowley to relax again, before gently running a careful finger over sleek feathers.

Crowley decided that felt nice. He'd certainly get Y/N to do that more.

Y/N settled for some gentle petting, and Crowley smiled softly. Y/N's fingers were a lot more skilled that he'd imagined (not that he'd admit to that) and Crowley found himself leaning back, and heard Y/M's soft laugh as their hands moved to the feathers closer to his back.

That's when Crowley made a fool of himself, and made a noise that could only be described as a moan. He froze, and Y/N froze too, and for a few moments they were still, before Y/N smirked.

Crowley, for the second time today, felt scared.

But this was a different type of scared.

"Okay, I can explain." Crowley started, but Y/N held a hand up, smirk still present, and Crowley gulped, his gold serpentine eyes unblinking as he watched Y/N.

"I'm never ever going to let that go...ever...and I will use it to my advantage." Y/N chuckled, and Crowley groaned.

"Whatever, just...do it again."

"Why?"

"Because it felt nice, do you realise how inaccessible that area of my wings is? They rarely get touched anyway, so, as ironic as it sounds, that felt heavenly. Now do it again." Crowley explained quickly.

Y/N sighed, and began running their fingers through the soft feathers again, and Crowley, once again, leant back, trying to get more.

It was then that Y/N realised that Crowley literally craved affection. And so, they hugged him.

Crowley's initial reaction was to jump away and spin around, startled, but he soon realised what was happening, and sat back down, facing Y/N, and he returned the hug.

Crowley wasn't as tough as he said he was, obviously.

Slender arms snaked around Y/N's body, and Crowley nuzzled into Y/N's neck, and even wrapped his wings around them. Y/N gently played with Crowley's hair as they hugged.

From then on, Crowley seemed a little nicer.

[little-bloodied-angel]

Idk if I'm going to get crucified or blocked, I hope not, but... Imho he's both, in this scene specifically. That's part of what a character being so complex means.

Yes, he's wrenching his heart out. Yes, he feels guilty for everything and especially for loving Crowley. Yes, he wants to go to Heaven because he wants to fix it! Yes, being who he is, he couldn't have stayed, as heartbreaking as it is. Of course those things are true.

But wanting to turn Crowley into an angel again is selfish. Wanting to drag Crowley back to his abusers is selfish (would he have done/wanted the second thing if Crowley had been more open about his pain? I've no idea, I hope not, I believe not. He can be very oblivious to the people around him when he's focused, including Crowley, and processing that his people hurt Crowley as much or more than Hell ever did would mean processing his own trauma, which he obviously hasn't done and isn't ready to do, and Crowley didn't spell it out for him like he did other things; he's still on the mindset of "us vs them", as evidenced by the fact that he tells Crowley that "of course you said no to them [Hell]. You're the bad guys!" You, not them, btw, which is another meta for another time).

He's being selfish in the way Crowley is selfish when he kisses him glasses-on to share the hurt just as much as to say goodbye, after it's all said and done.

Aziraphale thinks that for the first time since literally ever he'll be allowed to have both Heaven and Crowley. Of course he wants that, how could he not? He doesn't expect Crowley to say no, because he never has. And he's never really talked about how bad his trauma is, really. But he's still asking him to change a fundamental part of himself. It's selfish, but not in a terrible villainous way. In a very multifaceted, very human way.

Aziraphale does have more layers than an onion, and imho acting like some of those layers aren't flawed is also doing him a disservice. Of course he's flawed, and that means he's selfish sometimes. Who isn't?

They're both like us.

Edit: to be even clearer, I'm saying he's being selfish at the same time he's being a thousand other things, including selflessness, because that's how complex this whole situation is, and that this scene doesn't boil down to him being selfish but there is a (very understandable) element of that.

Do not ever tell me that Aziraphale is being selfish here.

Never. Not once. If you try to even start, shut your fucking mouth.

Do you know how hard it is to admit something like this when you're not even supposed to want anything?

Gabriel was surprised the first time he was given a gift.

Aziraphale is telling Crowley he wants to make things better, but he doesn't think he can do it without Crowley.

He is pouring his heart out right here. He doesn't think he can do enough good without Crowley. He wants to make Heaven better, but he thinks he needs Crowley to make it happen.

This is the one time that Crowley cannot help him, but that doesn't mean that what Aziraphale is doing is wrong.

Me saying that Aziraphale isn't doing anything wrong by going back to Heaven doesn't mean I'm saying Crowley is wrong for the choice he made either. Neither of them is wrong. This is not a black and white situation.

Aziraphale told Crowley he needed him while the Metatron was within hearing distance.

Let me say this as loudly as possible for you, m'kay?

AN ANGEL JUST TOLD A DEMON HE NEEDS HIM.

We all remember how that's a no-no, right?? That's exactly the kind of language Aziraphale always avoided because even ducks have ears. And the one time he used that kind of language was when the Metatron was waiting to take him back to Heaven because the Metatron knows about their history.

The last time Heaven implied that Aziraphale and Crowley were together, Sandalphon punched him in the stomach.

But go off with how Aziraphale is so selfish and only ever thinks about his own wants and needs after he bared his heart to Crowley in front of the fucking Metatron. Go off with how you keep proving you didn't understand the first thing about Aziraphale and Crowley's shades of grey discussion from 1941.

Be mad at Aziraphale if it helps you heal, but don't assassinate his character by turning him into someone he's not just because you're desperate for your villainized version of him to be real.

Crowley wouldn't stand for that shit because he's perfectly capable of taking care of himself.

[itsyaboiwritersblock]

Until We Meet Again

Pairing(s): Crowley x Female Human Reader

Rating: T

Warnings: Language, Angst, Implied Smut, Ducks

Words: 2,857

Genre: Angst, Drama

Part three of: “Won’t Say I’m in Love” and “Beauty and the Beast”

@pantaxbal @a-hoe-for-vanya @the-captain-kidd

I do not own the GIFs, characters, or song

The song is the “Aloha ‘Oe” from the movie “Lilo and Stitch″

“Oh, excuse me, miss? Do you work here?”

A sheepish voiced broke her out of the blank haze she was in, almost startling the book out of her hands. But nevertheless, she plastered on a fake smile and turned to the customer with a twinkle in her eye.

“Why, yes I do! Is there something you need help with, dear sir?”

The older man couldn't help but seem baffled by this young woman’s manners, which pulled him into the fake act further. He returned a smile of his own and took a step closer to the employee.

“Do you sell any true crime-”

“No, sorry.”

The man blinked, startled by the woman’s sudden snap at him, and instead of reacting the way he truly wanted to, he widened his smile and asked again.

“I’m sorry, maybe you misheard. I asked if you sold any true crime books.”

“And I said no, we don't, slimy old man.”

In truth, {Y/N} didn't have such an attitude, but when Aziraphale requested that he actually didn't want to sell any books at his shop, she stuck with the tactic of just scaring them away with her horrible act.

“Slimy? Young miss, that is no way to talk to someone! Now, one of my friends the other day told me that she had purchased a wonderful true crime book from here and I would like to do the same.”

“Your friend is absolutely off her rocker if she thinks she got one from here. If she’s around her age, I wouldn't blame her for mixing things up. Now, get lost and have a wonderful day sir!”

With that, the man mumbled a few choice words under his breath and stormed out of the shop, giving {Y/N} the opportunity to flip the sign in the door to “closed.” Aziraphale had ran to his study hours ago, trusting {Y/N} to keep his books safe from any humans.

This had been her new normal for the past year, really. Watch the shop for Aziraphale during the day, and in turn, he would keep her safe and let her live with him. Normally, {Y/N} would have been fine at her own flat, but, ever since Crowley’s disappearance, Aziraphale suggested she stay with him. Initially, she laughed it off, saying she could protect herself from any ballsy thug that tried to hurt her. That's when he told her she couldn't exactly fend off the forces of Hell.

Now that, that got her attention. And that was when she found out her dear Crowley was a demon, one that was once highly praised too. And of course, her best friend Aziraphale just so happened to be an angel, well, not any angel, a Principality at that! 

It was a lot of information for her to take in at once, in fact, when the angel first told her, she gave him a laugh before promptly passing out. And when she woke, she was greeted with the sight of two large, and obviously glowing, wings. Aziraphale gave her a rushed apology and quickly began to take care of her, while once again going over everything, but going slow this time.

That was how her current situation started, once she realized that actual beings of Hell would be looking for her because of Crowley, she began trusting Aziraphale more and more. Her life was in his hands, and truthfully she wouldn't have had it any other way.

“{Y/N} dear, have you closed up for the day?”

The angel’s voice carried down from the upper floor, causing her to smile because as soon as she told him the shop was indeed closed, he peeked his head out of the door. Eyes that were hiding behind glasses were wide, obviously from fear, he was really glad that {Y/N} was so comfortable with dealing with his customers.

“I’m going to grab some dinner, want me to get you something?”

Watching his expression change was priceless, a smile immediately overtook the frown that was on his pale features and he nodded enthusiastically.

“Okay, angel dork, I’ll be back later!”

{Y/N} grabbed her keys and coat before heading out the shop door and slipping into the familiar older black car and speeding away. The stereo softly played some random Queen song she already knew by heart, she could quote all of them at this point. 

Back at the shop, Aziraphale was startled from his work when he heard the little bell of his shop door ring, indicating that a customer had entered after closing hours. The angel groaned and pushed himself up from his chair, rushing down the stairs while he shouted at the intruding person.

“I apologize, maybe you didn't see the sign! I’m afraid we’re closed so if you. . .”

He trailed off, almost tripping over his feet as his heart seized in his chest for a moment. Was what he was seeing true? It couldn't be, right?

“I’m back, angel. Is my Dove around?”

The first thing {Y/N} heard when she walked into the shop was the sound of voices suddenly grew more hushed.

“Aziraphale? Is everything all right? I got sushi from that place you like down the road!”

She called out, but she didn't get a response, save for a muffled curse and the sound of panicked shuffling from the angel’s study. Frowning, she started ascending the stairs, bag abandoned on the floor as she reached for her coat pocket where a canister of pepper spray sat, ready to be used on any attacker.

“{Y/N} darling! I didn't expect you back so soon-!”

“Who’s in there, Aziraphale?”

“Pardon?”

Not waiting for an answer, her hand grabbed the small can in her pocket and she marched through the door of his study. But, in an instant, the object dropped from her hand, the clattering noise going unnoticed as she stared up at the bright yellow eyes she still loved.

“I’m home, Dove.”

The demon stepped forward and opened his arms, inviting his human into a hug. She accepted immediately, wrapping her arms around his thin frame, his own arms coming around to hold her now shaking body.

“Shh shh, it’s okay {Y/N}, I’m here.”

“You. . . You left me! You asshole, you left!”

She sobbed, weakly trying to pound her fists into his chest, but Crowley didn't react, knowing he deserved every once of anger that she was giving him.

“I had to, {Y/N}, I needed to keep you safe.”

For a moment, neither of them said anything, her head pressed into his chest, trying to calm down her breathing after sobbing like that. They both knew that Aziraphale was watching from the doorway, nervous about the reunion that was going on, ready to intervene at any moment if it was absolutely needed.

“Crowley?”

“Yes, Dove?”

“Can you say it?”

They both knew what she meant, but honestly, he was scared, not that he was scared he didn't mean it. He was scared it wouldn't mean anything to her, even if he never formally told her.

“Please?”

“I love you, {Y/N}.”

She couldn't help the smile that creeped along her features, causing her to bury her face in his chest further. Just hearing those words caused her heart to clench, because she could tell that he meant it.

“Now you have to say it back, {Y/N}.”

“I love you. I love you, I love you so much Crowley.”

“I love you more, you know.”

The human couldn't help but giggle, standing up on her tip toes to press her hips to his, feeling slim arms snake around her hips and pull her closer to him. Both of them had been ignoring the angel at this point, figuring he would have done the same, but it was the opposite, really, he couldn't look anywhere but at the two in front of them, focusing on one more than the other.

“Crowley, I think that is physically impossible.”

“Oh? Why don't I take you on a date tomorrow to prove my love then?”

The banter had started immediately when the two broke apart from the kiss, Crowley puffing his chest out in pride, convinced he could show his woman how much he loved her even if she wore a smug, unconvinced grin.

“All right, it’s a date then.”

In the morning, {Y/N} woke up bright and early, and already next to a grinning Crowley, who was idly tracing patterns on her hip with his finger.

“Did you really stay up all night watching me?”

“My dear Dove, I don't need to sleep.”

She couldn't help but giggle like that before swinging her legs off the side of the bed. It was a blur after that, she got ready as quick as she could still managing to dress up in a casual sundress and a light layer of makeup before Crowley was ushering her out of the door.

“So, where are we going, Crowley?”

“I figured we could spend a day at the park, and I already have everything packed in my car, so there’s no need to worry about that.”

He sent her his signature wink before the two slid into his car, realizing that there were a lot more miles on it than he remember, when he glanced over at {Y/N}, she couldn't help but pull a guilty expression.

“When you left, it was all I had left of you. . . I wanted to stay close to you somehow so. . . I drove it everywhere.”

She spoke through tears, voice cracking every once in a while, but the whole time she still remained smiling.

“Oh, Dove. . .”

He leaned in but she shooed him away with a playful grin, he looked hurt, of course, but she quickly recovered the moment.

“Ah, none of this sad stuff! We’re supposed to be having a date day!”

Crowley couldn't help but chuckle at her antics, giving her hair a quick ruffle before shifting the car into gear and driving it off. It was a short trip to the park, and when the two arrived, Crowley was glad he picked the park as the place for them to spend their date together.

“Crowley! It’s such a gorgeous day! You couldn't have picked a better day!”

She was facing the water when she exclaimed this, watching the sun hang high in the sky, so she missed Crowley’s grimace at his words.

“Let’s make the most of it then, right Dove?”

When she whipped around with a bright grin, he knew he said the right thing. His chest felt warm as he grabbed her hand and pulled her to an empty bench. He was grinning as he pulled out a basket from seemingly nowhere and set it on his lap, reaching inside to pull out a small bag filled with bread crumbs.

“I know this seems cheesy, but. . . I figured it could be fun?”

“It’s not cheesy! I love feeding the ducks! They’re so cute! Some ducklings hatched recently and Aziraphale wouldn't stop gushing over them!”

{Y/N} giggled, reaching her hand into the bag to toss out a handful of crumbs, watching the ducks eagerly run up and peck at what she threw on the ground. With a bright smile, Crowley copied her actions, tossing his own handful down, and the two continued this until the bag was empty. At that point, the two were giggling uncontrollably, watching the hoard of ducks rush over to the two to get a small bite of what they threw down. But when everything was finished, the ducks were still waddling over to them, watching them with expectant eyes. The human thought this was especially cute, well, until they started pecking at her shoe and started running after them as soon as the two stood up from the bench.

{Y/N} looked up at Crowley with a bright smile, even if she was out of breath from sprinting across the park, she was still convinced that it was the best date she had ever been on.

“Damn ducks! Never knew something so cute could be so scary.”

“I could say the same thing about you, Crowley.”

{Y/N} replied without a moment of hesitation, grin splitting wide when she saw Crowley sputtering and a bright red blush covering his features. He was going to snap something back at her but, that's when he felt it. A gentle raindrop hitting his nose, and that was all the warning they got before it started downpouring. With a shrieked giggle, {Y/N} grabbed Crowley’s hand and pulled him to the car, both out of breath and still laughing by the time they got there.

“So much for a date to prove my love, huh?”

“Oh, Crowley. . . You never need to prove your love to me. How about we go home and binge some movies?”

“Disney movies?”

“You know me so well.”

By the time they got home, the rain had only worsened and they were greeted by the sight of a startled and confused angel. When he asked what in the world had happened to the lovebirds, they could only answer in giggles as they glanced to each other. No other words were shared as {Y/N} tugged Crowley by the arm up to her room Aziraphale has made when she started living with him.

“Oh! Crowley, your clothes! We should-”

{Y/N} was cut off by the sound of a short snap and in an instant, their clothes were miraculously dry, which caused {Y/N} to gape in amazement.

“So, Dove, what movie were you planning on this time?”

“Toy Story!”

She seemed fairly excited because as soon as Crowley asked the question, she was already holding a stack of cases in her hand, and on the top was Toy Story.

“As much as I love how excited you are, Dove. I’ve already seen it.”

“No problem! We can just watch the second then!”

She replied without missing a beat, already sliding the disk into the player before jumping onto her bed with an excited giggle, patting the space beside her, inviting Crowley to sit next to her. He slid next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders before silently letting the movie play.

The two stayed like that for what felt like forever, just staying in each other’s arms not saying a word. It was Crowley that broke the moment, actually, gently grabbing {Y/N}’s chin and tilting it up so her eyes could meet his gaze. His lips met hers, and for the rest of the night, the only thing the two could focus on was each other, not the movie, nor a flustered angel that was embarrassed by the noises he could hear.

“I want things to stay like this forever.”

He hummed in response to her statement, both exhausted and wishing for sleep, well, {Y/N} wishing for sleep and Crowley just wanting rest. For the rest of the night, she stayed in his arms, warm, content, and loved. She savored the feeling for as long as she could, because in the morning, she woke up cold and feeling as lonely as she just a few days before.

Forcing herself out of bed, she stared at the floor with heavy lidded eyes before sniffing once, trying to keep an onslaught of tears at bay. Despite the fact that she wasn’t wearing anything, she stood up, wrapped a robe around herself and marched down the stairs. She knew that Aziraphale would be at the farmer’s market at this time, and there was no way he would keep the shop open when he wasn't there. So, she wandered into the makeshift kitchen and planned her breakfast, well, not before plugging in her phone to the speaker the angel had in there just for her.

“Haʻaheo e ka ua i nā pali.”

{Y/N} blankly wandered around the kitchen as she listened to the song play, despite that it wasn't in English, she knew what the meaning was, and it already hit way too close to home. She grabbed a pan and gently set it on the stove, listening to the soft song continue for a bit, all the while her heart ached at the sound of the lyrics.

“E hahai (uhai) ana paha i ka liko.”

And that’s when it started, just as a sniffle, scrunching her nose at the fact that she couldn't keep it together for just a moment. But the chorus was what really caused it all.

“Aloha ʻoe, aloha ʻoe.”

At this point, she let out a small sob, feeling her small frame beginning to shake and tremble as she eventually fell to her knees. She openly cried, the heels of her hands digging into her eyes as she practically screamed and sobbed out everything she felt.

“Until we meet again.”

Usually, music would make her happy, make her smile, especially that lyric. It would have given her hope, that she would, once again, see the man that she loved. But with how she was feeling right now, she wasn't sure if she ever wanted to see him again, not if he was going to just leave without explanation.

NOTE: Aha! I hope this is okay, this was supposed to be the final part, but I had so much planned I just couldn't fit it into part three, so I’m splitting it and this is getting a part four. I hope you all liked it! See y’all in part four or- maybe in something else if I need a break from this dramatic POS :’)

[gravityfissure]

[meta] What, if any, games, movies, books, tv shows, etc. have you drawn influence from for your character?

Okay so round 2, much in the same vein for Arthur there are... A lot. Possibly even more things that influence and inspire where Otto’s muse and views comes from. That said in writing this there are also a LOT of similarities between the characters I can pick out certain attributes and to be honest there’s a lot of crossover with the traits and characterisations highlighted.

Namely: playful and proactive, self-serving yet loyal to those that meet his criteria as to who is deserving of it. A grifter by nature that will approach almost any situation if he feels he’ll get something out of it while equally hoping that one day someone might actually bother to ask him (and maybe give him a true reason) to stay.

Dorian - Dragon Age: Inquisition

Uh, the heir of a famous magical dynasty? A flair of magical talent that made him the envy of his peers? Studied at one of the best colleges for the magical arts before being kicked out and privately tutored before eventually vanishing and being found by Magister Gereon Alexius who offered to take him as his apprentice eventually becoming a fully-ranked enchanter. A pariah for opposing every fault his homeland is renowned for?

It’s been years since I’ve played DA:I and Dorian always was one of my favourite characters but tbh I completely forgot his background and it’s only in revisiting it now I actually realise the similarities in the framework of their characters/development/story line. Not to mention the fact they both enjoy playful flirtation and witty banter and oppose the things they don’t fit into their view of the world. They will probably do the right thing, but that doesn’t mean they might not take their sweet ass time in actually getting into a situation.

Isabela - Dragon Age II and Inquisition 

AND AGAIN. Isabela’s a great character - a pirate scourge of coastlines and nations around the world who values fun, freedom and getting ahead in life. They both value solving situations in clever and devious ways and getting ahead even if it means being somewhat selfish when they’re dealing with other people, example: Otto conning Deirdre out of $28k when she tried to cover for Regan or those plans he has to try and record a banshee scream? They’re both always down for trying to squeeze that little bit extra out of a person. If it one ups them in life and people are gullible enough to fall for it well... They really did it to themselves didn’t they?

But that doesn’t mean there aren’t depths to that hardened persona they both present. There are actual feelings and things hidden behind the wall and appearance they both present to the world. And underneath it all they’re both afraid of being left behind, but figure it’s best to push people away before they decide to leave of their own volition. At least that way they can say they have some control over the situation.. 

Sera - Dragon Age: Inquisition

Apparently this is a DA characters list but you know what sue me. x) So NEXT on the list is Sera, an elven archer who is incredibly impulsive and reactionary. She takes pure delight in humbling the established authority she views as arrogant and selfish. It’s less about what’s right in the grand scheme of things but more about what’s right in that very moment. She doesn’t believe in actions taken for a greater good, instead viewing it as just another excuse to hurt others undeserving of such treatment because it’s easier than making the truly hard choices in life. 

Felix Dawkins - Orphan Black

Look Felix is one of the many fascinating characters on Orphan Black. Don’t get me wrong there are SO many and it’s a great show. But Felix is a character whose very existence proves that you can have a very effeminate, boisterous, loud, witty gay character and not have him be limited to the perpetuation of the sassy gay friend stereotype. Why? Because he has a whole complex personality beyond just that aspect of his life. He’s got to deal with real life issues on top of all the drama clone club brings into his life and he deals and he survives and he cOPES.

Not to mention he’s a positive representation of foster children being happy, positive representation of LGBTQ+ characters and gives positive representation of sex workers. Not to mention on top of all that representation you see how he’s smart as hell, the only person who knows Sarah well enough to keep her on track. The BEST uncle to Kira and one of the most supportive characters on the show. 

Sarah - Orphan Black

Felix’s foster-sister, another character that shows the positive and complex dynamic that foster families tend to have while also demonstrating the fascinating found-family dynamic with clone club. Sarah’s interesting because she’s a natural chameleon, she’s street-smart and tough, a born outsider living on the fringes by her wits while in possession of a dark sense of humour that sees her by.

Sarah and Otto have a rather morally ambiguous compass, they’re both characters who swing between being very self-serving and selfish and acting for the greater good when they decide it’s needed. Not to mention the act as if they don’t care about other people’s issues (see clone club) when actually it transpires they both might just care a little more than they actually let on.

Garcia Flynn - Timeless

Unfortunately Garcia fits the my favourite character type: tall, dark, snarky, sassy antihero motivated fiercely by love and willing to do things of questionable morality against a greater evil, self-aware and doesn’t make excuses for his behaviour, but isn’t wringing his hands over it either.  A character who so dearly loves the people in his life (see revenge for his wife and daughter) so much so he’s still fighting for them 5 years later just to be alive and not even to have anything to do with him again because he knows the things he’s done are enough the he could never go back to being that person for them. The man who loved his mum and went on a trip just to make her happy and save his brother. When he truly cares for someone he does EVERYTHING for them while somehow having none of the toxic jealous possessive business, despite his  well-attested Garbage Drama in other departments, and just generally being a mature adult and an essentially good person who has gone down some really dark places and is finally rediscovering what he’s buried and lost. Look man, I’m a suuuuuuuuuuuuucker for found family, enemies to lovers, and villain becomes weird family member. And he covers all of those, so yes. 

There’s a lot of that I’m planning and drawing on for Otto, this weird currently antagonistic little self-serving shit who is out for his own ends but maybe along the way finds some semblence of a conscious and maybe has a fair few moral dilemmas and self-questioning moments along the way? Who maybe finds friends (and even love?) Who has to deal with FEELINGS and things he’s repressed for years because of the things he’s done just to survive the life he fell into? Uh, yes give me give me give me.

Jesse Custer - Preacher

Okay, so this one’s kind of another given. Jesse’s another character I’m fascinated with because before Genesis’ arrival he was a down upon his luck preacher. A man who was trying so hard to fit into his dad’s ideal and not let the life he had before affect his day to day. Except it all goes to hell in a handbasket because of course it does.

Jesse essentially gains the ability to make anyone do anything he says. And that power? It’s addictive, and we see the struggle he goes through to learn how to control and manipulate it to his own end. To begin with he tries to right wrongs, to tell people to stop doing the bad things they’re doing in their lives and fix them so they’re better people but with each act that power and god-complex grows. It goes to his head until we meet the moronic messiah Humperdoo and Jesse eventually agrees to take his place. The messiah-complex and power corruption is complete, and the repercussions of his choices are devastating especially with how they impact Cassidy or Tulip and the repercussions in Angelville.

Much like Otto’s own magic, the more its used the more enticing it is to carry on using it for more and more things. At first it was small deeds, little acts of good until Otto in kind started to realise that good deeds weren’t enough to make a change. They weren’t enough for other people around him and with each act it grew and grew - and it continues to grow. The question is to what level? And if it ever got out of control, would he ever know how to stop it?

Crowley - Good Omens

An overall non-threatening demon, who tries to be “evil” in his own way to fit into the role his society (other demons) expect of him. Crowley wants to save the world (for his own reasons) and can be rather self-serving in certain moments. There’s plenty of times he tried to convince Aziraphale to run away with him and let everything else forgive the irony but for lack of a better term “go to hell” but he always comes around in the end (typically to a Queen track) to help when it really counts for something.

 Not to mention his flare for the dramatic, very rarely thinking things through, with many of his own plans backfiring on him.  

Sound familiar?

Wrench - Watch Dogs 2

Part-hacker and full-fledged anarchist who wears a freaky mask with LED displays capable of bizarre emoticons. He's vulgar, crude, entertaining and an absolute adrenaline junkie who lives on the edge. He's jokingly called the wrench because he's the wrench you throw into somebody's gears to grind them to a halt.

The final one on the list, because it’s a side I haven’t yet played into so much but I’m curious to given means and opportunity to. Otto does have some inclination towards an anarchistic nature, if a system doesn’t seem to work he isn’t afraid to speak out or more likely act out against it. Whether it’s in the greater good or not isn’t so much relevant rather that he would happily take a torch and burn something to the ground if it meant starting again with something new and better in its place. It’s definitely something I want to explore more down the line.

I also find it interesting the whole concept of “hiding behind a mask” which is something wrench quite literally does. Both have built personas to defend themselves from people breaking through and seeing that what actually exists on the other side is a rather shy and awkward person who tries to “act out” and be “dramatic” in an attempt to get attention from a world in which there’s so much noise how could anyone ever feel like their voice mattered let alone be heard unless they started shouting “HEY, LOOK AT ME” at the top of his lungs?  

[anasticklefics]

The In Between

Fandom: Good Omens

Characters: Crowley/Aziraphale (very pre-slash, thanks Aziraphale)

Summary: They meet at the in betweens - between the beginning and the end - and yet Aziraphale refuses to acknowledge what they’ve been through. It hurts Crowley more than he can explain.

Words: 1 284

They met at the start of the world, and they met at the potential end. But during the in between, they did more than meet.

Crowley had accepted that Aziraphale refused to acknowledge the in between when they met again during emergencies, but he remembered. He remembered the walks along the Nile, watching Egypt thrive. Cleopatra’s reign, the fall of the Roman Empire, the Vikings taking over the sea. He was there for all of them, sometimes with Aziraphale at his side, the latter frowning or smiling depending on what part of history they were witnessing.

Crowley remembered the meals shared in small taverns on Greek side streets, both remembering when those lands were a battlefield.

“I talked to Homer once, you know,” Azi had said, his eyes on the cobblestone. “I asked him to write it all down.”

They met on the mountainside in China, took a short trip through Mogadishu, once had lunch in Moscow. On one particularly rough night they stayed at a motel in California, like some sort of cliché. But he remembered the week in Bolivia the most. They truly had had no reason to stay a week. Aziraphale had already purchased his bookstore at that point, and yet they’d stayed, in a small town up north.

Much had been said during that week. Too much, Crowley decided when Azi refused to act on it once they’d left. Maybe he hadn’t understood what Crowley had meant when he’d said that he could spend the rest of eternity by his side and not once be unhappy. Maybe Crowley had been too forward, but come on, they’d known each other at least 5000 years at that point.

“You go too fast for me, Crowley,” Azi said many years later, the two in Crowley’s car. Maybe that was true, but Satan help him if he had to slow down to Azi’s snail pace anytime soon.

Yeah, he was bitter. Bitter that only he seemed to remember the in between.

Usually, they met in London. On a park bench, having ice cream or coffee or nothing, and then sharing a meal at whatever restaurant Aziraphale led them to. But Crowley’s mind was still in that motel in Bolivia, tucked between the sheets in the dimly lit room with only one bed. Silk pyjamas even in the heat, the TV on way past their bedtime. No reason to stay, finding many reasons to leave, and yet staying anyway.

For years, Crowley would return, without Aziraphale, just to make sure the place had been real. He even shed a tear, when he returned one day to find it gone. Demolished. An earthquake or an accident or a thoroughly thought through decision to let that part of the village go.

He never told Azi about all of this. Had had his heart, or whatever the demon equivalent to it was, broken too many times when Aziraphale pretended not to remember. Made light of the whole thing. He would never understand it.

“I don’t even like you.”

“Way to go, angel,” he’d wanted to say. “You’ve discovered how to kill a demon without holy water.”

And then they’d saved the world, and with Aziraphale’s bookshop burnt to the ground he’d had no choice but to come spend the night at Crowley’s.

“You can have the bed,” he told him. “I’ve passed out on the couch more times than I can count anyway.”

“I can’t possibly kick you out of your own bed, Crowley,” Aziraphale said, appalled.

“And I can’t put a guest with nowhere to go on my shitty couch.”

“Well, I guess we’ll have to share the bed then.”

Crowley blinked, once, twice, took off his sunglasses as if he’d hear him more clearly without them. “You want to share a bed?”

Aziraphale wasn’t looking at him. “I see no reason why not.”

“You’ll pretend it didn’t happen tomorrow,” Crowley didn’t say aloud. “You always do.”

Nothing would happen. Nothing happened in Bolivia, apart from words. It was enough for him. Always had been. Aziraphale padded across the room, slid in under the covers beside him, and Crowley felt the sadness engulf him. Aziraphale’s sadness for the bookshop. The inevitable consequences. Their ineffable situations.

Crowley shut his eyes, willing sleep to come quickly. Unable to stand another moment of Azi’s weight beside him without any proper contact. 6000 years of this. 6000 years of Aziraphale pretending they weren’t friends. 6000 years of Crowley pretending he didn’t care after each rebuke.

He cared so much it almost broke him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t let you grieve for your car,” Aziraphale suddenly said, his voice so low Crowley might’ve imagined it.

He opened his eyes again, turning his head to see the vague outline of his one companion. Aziraphale wasn’t looking at him, as far as he could tell.

“It wasn’t the time,” Crowley replied. “Much more critical matters to take care of.”

“Still. It was unfair of me to dismiss your feelings.”

“Is this about your bookshops?”

Aziraphale exhaled slowly. “I’m being selfish. I only realized your pain once I was going through it myself.” He turned toward him, rolling onto his side so that their faces were almost touching. “I’m gonna go visit it tomorrow. Say a proper goodbye. If you want I can go with you to the Air Force and do the same to your car.”

Crowley didn’t dare move. “I’ve made my peace.”

“You haven’t.”

“Since when are you an expert on my feelings?”

“Can’t you see, you silly demon?” Aziraphale was smiling. Crowley could hear it in his voice. “I always was.”

6000 years for that acknowledgment. 6000 years of stolen in between’s.

Crowley didn’t know what to do with this moment now. He felt damn near close to exploding.

“Can I hold your hand?” Aziraphale finally asked. “Just this once?”

“I’m not letting you hold anything if you’re only gonna do it once,” was Crowley’s reply, and Aziraphale laughed and laughed and clutched at his fingers, the contact so sudden Crowley nearly withdrew.

“So needy.” Azi gave his hand a squeeze. “You were always so needy.”

Crowley had to admit moments like this weren’t anywhere near his area of expertise so, naturally, he panicked; thinking a poke to Azi’s side was the appropriate response.

Oh, but Aziraphale’s response was definitely one for the books.

“6000 years and I find out you’re ticklish now.”

“It’s my vessel-”

“Which you’ve had since we first met.”

“Oh, come on now, don’t do anything drastic.”

“When have I ever done anything drastic, angel?”

“Do I really need to answer that- wait!”

Crowley never expected his first proper contact with Aziraphale to be due to a sensitive vessel, but he’d take anything he was given. To hear his laughter wasn’t too shabby either, he had to admit. Sitting up so that he could trap him against the mattress more effectively, Crowley let his fingers spider up Azi’s sides.

He hadn’t tickled many people (or any), but he’d seen it happen on both screens and in front of him, and when he expected Aziraphale to kick out and try to get away, he found him merely squirming. Giggling, yes - which was wonderful, shh - but other than his body’s automatic response he didn’t seem to be suffering too much at Crowley’s hands.

Huh. That was a first.

“Stop it,” he pleaded anyway, gripping one of Crowley’s wrists, but doing nothing to push it off.

“Can’t handle it, angel?”

“Don’t be mean!”

“I’m a demon.”

“You’re a softie- ah, no!”

“That’s for the insult.”

The night turned out to be much easier than they’d expected. A good way to prepare for the hardships of the next day, Crowley decided.

[angelicspaceprince]

Broken Promises

Author: Ama

Title: Broken Promises

Pairing: Poly!Aziraphale x Reader x Crowley

Character/s: Crowley/Raphael, Aziraphale, Reader, Gabriel

Word Count: 1, 626 words

Warnings: Is sad, mentions of falling, Gabriel being a dick, sad!Crowley, mentions of Crowley's past, the whole thing about nearly being murdered by Heaven

Prompt: After the whole ordeal with Heaven, Crowley finds his past revisiting him as he tries to sleep. His partner's try and help comfort him and reminding him that, through it all, they still have them.

Notes: So, I lied. I wrote this at 4 in the morning rather than sleeping because I found THIS AMAZING PIECE OF ART WORK BY @philiasperanzart and I simply had to share! Sorry if its OOC and shit but its 4 am and I can't help it when inspiration hits.

Italics – clashing of memories, italics will always be the Heaven scene where normal text (with context) will be memories of before Crowley’s fall.

Also – so I am of the opinion that Gabriel cares very much but after centuries of seeing his brothers and sisters fall and being emotionally unavailable (specifically after this fic) he just doesn’t know how to make himself vulnerable, so he hides it behind crack shots and remarks that he doesn’t know are shitty, yet they are. And when he tells ‘Aziraphale’ to just die already, he’s angry. Because he has seen siblings of his fall over everything and surely Aziraphale would know by now? Not to fraternize with demons. They can’t risk him falling, so they have to kill him and I think he’s putting up a brave front because he doesn’t want Aziraphale’s death. Also, the fact that Aziraphale was friends (at a very bare minimum, lets face it, they’re married) with Crowley made it 10x worse, as this fic will explore slightly. Additionally (final notes) I made this a poly!Aziraphale x reader x Crowley fic because we don’t have enough of these fics in our lives. You are all very very welcome.

Buy Me a Coffee

 Broken Promises

The words still rung clear in Crowley’s head.

“Please just shut your stupid mouth and die already.”

They still stung, possibly more than anything else that Gabriel has ever said directly or indirectly to the demon.

His body had moved on, but his mind was still back there.

It was very bright when he first opened his eyes, and the small angel in front of him just seemed to radiate love and happiness. “You must be Raphael! I’ve been waiting for you!”

“Shut your stupid mouth-”

“I’m Gabriel! I am your brother, I’ll be your companion!”

“-and die already.”

“I’ll be by your side no matter what!”

The heat didn’t even hurt Crowley as he approached the flames. But the words?

“I’ll protect you from all the bad things!”

The words burnt more than the flames ever would.

When Crowley first attempted to fly, Gabriel was there. “Don’t worry, Raphael! We all fall down sometimes, I’ll always be here to pick you up!”

“Just shut your stupid mouth-”

But he wasn’t.

“-and die already.”

His first cock-up with a miracle. Gabriel was there. “It’s ok, Raphael, I can fix it! Next time, we can practice on something smaller and work up to something this big!”

Just -

When Lucifer fell, it was the first time Crowley saw Gabriel snap. “Don’t cry, Raphael! It’s all a part of our Mother’s plan. It’s ineffable! Surely She knew this was going to happen!”

shut –

“What if it happens to me? To the rest of us?” Gabriel simply took a calming breath and smiled as he brought his brother in close. “It won’t! We just have to love God more than anything else and obey all Her commands without question. We won’t fall, Raphael, we know better.”

your –

Then more angels fell, taking after Lucifer’s example. Gabriel was there after every single one. “Does it hurt?” “I don’t know, Raphael. I hope not. I don’t want them to feel pain as they fall.”

stupid –

The more angels who fell, the more closed off Gabriel became. “Gabriel? What did Anna do to fall?” “I don’t know Raphael, he must have done something.”

mouth –

“Gabriel, will you still talk to me if I fall?” “Why would I?” “Because we are brothers.” “Raphael, if you fall, we will never talk again. It’s just the way things are.”

and –

And then Crowley fell. Gabriel was there when it happened. His eyes were cold as he watched Crowley begin his descent into Hell.

die –

Gabriel was wrong.

already.

Crowley burned.

But even the pain from falling was nothing compared to hearing those words from his once dear brother’s mouth.

Crowley fights back tears as he tries to process what happened in Heaven when he feels two arms start to snake their way around him. Too warm to be Aziraphale. Y/N.

“Crow, it’s 4 in the morning, what’s going on?” Your tired voice murmurs into his ear, resting on your side as you try to bring him in closer.

“It’s nothing pet, go back to sleep.” You mumble before bringing yourself closer, ignoring Aziraphale’s tired whimpers when you leave his grip.

“Don’t lie to me, love.” Crowley rolls his eyes. “It may be what demons do, but it’s not what you do.” Silence rings between the two of you before the sound of shuffling fills the room as Crowley moves his body to be able to curl up against your chest, your head moving automatically to rest against his hair. “Is it about what happened when you went upstairs?” He nods slightly. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

“Not really.”

“Do you need to tell me?”

“Probably.”

You wait for Crowley to start talking, not wanting to push him until he felt uncomfortable talking to you. “There wasn’t even a trial.”

You hum. “What do you mean?”

“I got a trial. Yes, it was a sham of a trial, just to showcase off how cruel Beelzebub can be and how my behaviour wouldn’t be tolerated. But it was a trial. Heaven didn’t even try. They just…..sentenced Aziraphale to death.” You wait.

“There’s more, isn’t there.” It’s not a question, a statement. You know he’s holding back.

“Just something Gabriel said, it doesn’t matter.”

“Evidently, it does.”

“Would you drop it?”

“No.” Crowley sighs, your voice clear. You weren’t dropping it until you knew the whole truth.

“Being in Heaven reminded me of the times before I fell. That, coupled with just the whole stress of the situation? Wasn’t really that nice for me.”

“I thought you don’t do nice.”

“I don’t, Heaven’s s’pposed to though.”

“True.” You move your hand to play with his hair in a small form of comfort. “Why did you fall?”

“I asked too many questions.”

“Too many?”

“One.”

“Which was?”

“Why can’t we love God as much as we love each other.” You hum. “Heaven didn’t like that very much.”

“I can tell.” You swear Crowley is purring as you continue to massage his scalp, but you definitely don’t tell him that. Not when you are slowly getting him to open up. “Do you miss Heaven?” Crowley shrugs.

“Not particularly. Too bright. Too ‘do as your told and not as you think’.”

“I thought Heaven would be more loving.”

“Trust me, its not.” You sigh, bringing your lips to his forehead. “I miss the way Gabriel treated me before I fell.” He finally admits before opening up about how Gabriel was his mentor, his guide through everything angelic. How they made the stars together, how Gabriel was there through every tumble and fall. Except for his last one. “I miss the comradery.”

You pause for a minute, feeling Aziraphale come up behind you, clearly still asleep. A rare commodity for him. “I think Gabriel misses it too.” Crowley’s eyes meet yours, seemingly confused. “Well, he hates the fact Aziraphale is friends with you. Possibly because he feels bad that he couldn’t save you from falling when all you did was ask a question. He probably was upset when you fell because he couldn’t save you, but also, the two of you were close. And he couldn’t talk to you about it or question anyone else about it because, after all, it was in God’s plan. And Her plan is ineffable. But, I think there is something Gabriel didn’t take into account. You didn’t fall. At least not all the way. Your body made it to Hell, but your soul stayed on Earth. You have never been fully an angel or fully a demon, you’ve always been something different, something in between. But what makes you special is that you think outside the box, you’re creative, you don’t stick to the rules, you bend them until they are close to breaking and then hope that they’re made of rubber as you bend them some more. That’s not a demonic or angelic quality. That’s a human quality. And that’s why Heaven and Hell are so scared of you. Because what they see as bad, humans see as good. And I think that’s important for you to know.”

Crowley thinks over your words for a minute before rolling his eyes. “Oh yes, of course, that’s totally what they are afraid of. Not the fact that I tempted an angel and got away with it.”

“You’re being sarcastic because you know I have a valid point.” You retort. “Would you rather have not fallen, stayed chummy with Gabriel who is, as kind as I’m sure he was in the past, a bit of a prat or would you rather have fallen and have met Aziraphale, fallen in love with him and lived your life with him?”

“What about you?”

“I’m human, I’m only temporary.”

“You are just as important, Y/N.” Aziraphale’s voice chimes in. You roll your eyes.

“This is about cheering Crowley up, angel, not me.” Aziraphale places his chin on your side as he peers over you to look down at his other partner.

“What’s upsetting him?”

“Nothing, angel.”

“Heaven didn’t give you a trial and being in Heaven reminded him of like pre-snake eyes.” Aziraphale’s mouth forms an ‘o’ of shock before he places an arm over you and Crowley.

“Heaven’s Heaven, my dear. No need to waste time thinking about them when we have our own little haven here – that’s what matters now.” Crowley seems to sulk under Aziraphale’s words, most likely because you had worded him out.

“We also don’t know that this wasn’t a part of God’s plan, ya know.” You say gently. “For all we know, She’s up there playing matchmaker and that’s why things have gone tits up. Heaven don’t talk to Her much anymore, that’s why they acted drastically.”

“It’s not part of Her plan.”

“But we don’t know that. At the end of it all, Crowley, we don’t know. We love you, we will always be here for you and if you fall, we’ll be here to pick you back up. It’s ok to think of the past and reminisce but not if it affects you in this way.” Aziraphale nods as his eyes flicker between the two of you. “We aren’t leaving you any time soon, Crowley.”

“Promise?” His voice sounds tired, weak. As if he has heard that promise before only for it to be broken.

“Promise.” The two of you state at the same time.

Crowley seems content with that as he burrows in closer. He mumbles something that you can’t make out, but you get the gist. “We love you too Crow. Sleep?”

Crowley simply nods.

The memories of Gabriel never leave Crowley, nor the hurt of his words, and his actions. But when he’s with you and Aziraphale, those memories always seem to become a little less bitter.

[ineffable-writer]

1500 words of Ineffable Husbands on a train together

All my sketches of locations/situations/whatever turn into drabbles about these two eventually so I’ve started posting ‘em. 

The title is the summary. Literally just a description of my trip out to a weekend writing retreat, but with the husbands added in. I have no idea why I can read 8,000,000,000,000 drabbles of the two of them being domestic but I figure I can’t be the only one so?

Read it here. Or below the break.

Sketch written on a train from Edinburgh to Inverness

Crowley was bent into a checkmark, legs up on the carriage table and his back contorted to fit into the plastic, scrappy seat. His phone was out of battery. It had been for like half an hour, but he wasn’t going to forfeit his new high score in Flappy Bird, so he was having none of it.

“You are missing the scenery,” said Aziraphale, sitting beside him, beside the window. Back straight. Eyes as bright and blue as ever. Ridiculously charmed with the countryside. Which was just sheep, Crowley thought. Sheep and farms and a bit more vertical in places. They’d spent centuries pinging across this country like the ball in an ineffable game of table tennis, constantly moving by foot and by car and—his buttocks still ached in empathy for the past—horseback.

“I’m familiar with the look of sheep.” Crowley did not see the appeal.

“You’re familiar with- with that silly telephone,” said Aziraphale, with enough vehemence to imply that silly was understatement, but enough familiarity that Crowley knew he’d already been forgiven. Crowley leaned into Aziraphale’s shoulder a little, a reminder: I’m here, remember, I came on this trip for you. The angel smiled, did that little shifting wiggle of his shoulders that showed he was pleased. “I’ll never understand your fascination with that… thing.”

“You’d love it if you gave it a try. I’d lose you forever to Candy Crush.”

“No. You wouldn’t.”

Right. Ever since the end-of-the-world-that-wasn’t, Aziraphale had been going rather hard on the whole our side thing. They were still getting used to that. Six thousand years assuming that eventually, the angel would fuck back off to Heaven, and now he couldn’t make jokes even tangential to the topic. It wasn’t a bad thing. Just took some getting used to.

It didn’t require an answer. Just a smile.

The train to Inverness filled quickly. When they’d left Edinburgh, the cheap seats had been nearly empty; each stop let on a character or two, or three, or four. The tables filled first, then the row seats, as the overhead shelving cluttered up with bags and backpacks and market bags full of wrapped presents. ‘Twas the season.

Somehow no one joined their table, no matter how enthusiastically Aziraphale beamed at them, and eventually two new row seats appeared behind them to make up for the ones Crowley was so selfishly hogging. Instead the humans milled around them and talked and gossiped and—

Oh, I think he fancies it, honestly, he just pretends he hates the attention—

—you walk right up to the top and it’s the most beautiful view—

—hi how are you hi how are you hi how are you hi— Relax, darling, just relax, enjoy your trip—

Aziraphale glanced over his shoulder at the last, a poor overstimulated young man and his father, who was doing his best to help but still had to battle against the jostle and hubbub of the carriage. The angel brushed a bit of lint off his jacket. Suddenly father and son found their table to be less chaotic, less alarming.

“Oy. You can’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Now I’ve got to go and inconvenience someone, even you out.”

“We don’t have to, you know.”

Crowley raised an eyebrow.

“That woman in the… hat is thinking infuriatingly eugenic thoughts, if you’re looking for someone to inconvenience. Have at it.”

“Now you’re just using me,” Crowley complained, but suddenly her cell phone battery was dead, and his was full again. The angel was right, of course. It wouldn’t be any fun ruining someone’s day if they didn’t deserve it just a little bit.

They passed through the country, the low and rolling hills, with the angled sunlight of late December casting golden shadows over the Highlands. Distant pines contrasted against the midday sunset—obsidian arrows against pink and blue and grey. They dipped in and out of tunnels like pens into an inkwell, brief forays into the black. They passed villages—Perth and Pilochry—made of houses from a dozen bygone days, Georgian and Victorian and modern and suburbian and sometimes a dozen at once. Mountains with snowcaps rose on the horizon and fell behind the nearer hills. The grass was yellow with winter, the trees marbled with green and brown.

Crowley had died in Flappy Bird and put aside his phone eventually. Aziraphale had not moved from his admiration of the windows. Crowley sighed and relaxed a little further and his head leaned against Aziraphale’s shoulder, now, rather than a simple lean.

“Why did you insist on the train, Angel?”

“Other than wanting to ensure we arrived in one piece?”

“Other than that.”

“It’s still here.” No one would overhear them, but Aziraphale’s voice was quiet anyway. “It nearly wasn’t.”

Again, no response required: Aziraphale knew Crowley understood he was only partially talking about the landscape. In the Bentley they’d have been alone together—which was beautiful, perfect, something they would never get tired of. But they would have been alone. Here, they were not alone.

The father and son had been joined by a woman and her small child, and the son was bonding with them over an ipad. A person of indiscriminate gender was tucked against a window, scribbling in a journal and wearing a sweatervest that would make Aziraphale proud. People all around them were drinking coffee and trading holiday plans and moving bags so the trolley could get through and existing. Wholeheartedly and completely here.

The sun had set, but the light lingered, and they hit the snow line—first in the distant hills, then in patches in the dark grass, then a blossoming white spotted with trees. The Highlands rose around them, true mountains now, great slabs of snow and rock with clouds that sank, low and foggy, into the valleys between them. Even Crowley was a little impressed. He relinquished his phone to Aziraphale for the price of exactly one terrible picture that got more of the seats in it than the mountains. When they got home, they’d frame it.

It hadn’t been Crowley’s idea to spend the holidays here. He’d have been happy to stay in Sussex with their usual tradition—cocoa, books, a general disbelief that no one was going to dump holy water all over him—but the angel had been struck with a particular sort of wanderlust lately. So here they were.

Kingussie. Aviemore. Please mind the gap when alighting from this train. The night was spilling like ink into the sky. Stonework gave way to lights nestled in the darkness, villages transformed into scattered diamonds. A man in a red tracksuit got on the train and sat across the corridor, his infant granddaughter in tow. She wore neon pink and curls to rival the angel’s. He held his hands around her, infinitely careful as she tried to learn to walk on a table on the train. She fell—often—but her grandfather caught her, and she had a downright beatific smile. Crowley’s heart warmed and softened at the edges. He took Aziraphale’s hand under the table.

Stars outside, now, a trip down memory lane that came in the form of icicle lights and streetlamps. The universe hadn’t been lit with the neon of a gas station or inflatable Santa Clauses, but somehow the train seemed to be gliding through creation, lost at the beginning of the world.

This is Aviemore. This train is for Inverness. Next stop is Inverness.

Crowley closed his eyes to nap, well aware that Aziraphale would be keenly aware of the evenness of Crowley’s unconscious breath and the closeness of their bodies. He didn’t sleep. Aziraphale was right. There was too much humanity around them not to bask in it a little.

The person in the sweatervest closed their book and they both felt a little pang of heartbreak echo through the car: heartbreak, loss, an echo of a grey day and a bandstand at the end of the world. Some healing loss, some missing piece. It vanished when they smiled at the baby—a smile that rosy could solve any problem in the world, surely—and angel and demon both felt a human identity swell in their chests. Someone squeezed the other’s hand, and then a man in a crew cut started in on a loud phone call in French and the angel’s face furrowed in concentration and Crowley chuckled, because of course Aziraphale was trying to remember enough to listen in.

It earned him a nudge with a rather-entangled-by-now elbow. “Now I thought you were sleeping.”

“We’re nearly there. Don’t have the time.”

“So you’re just watching me, then.”

“You’re entertainment.” In a moment he would get his legs off the table, even, and stretch, and crack his back loudly enough to make everyone around them wince. They’d pull into the station and Aziraphale would insist on enduring a taxi to their cottage, and Crowley would break the pay machines at the barrier to the bathrooms just to get his angel’s stupid enthusiasm out of the air a little, and then they’d both unpack their bags at different times—secretive—since they were currently pretending they hadn’t bought each other gifts.

But not yet.

He could pretend to sleep on Aziraphale’s shoulder for a little bit longer.

[niceprophecies]

Nope. Just no.

Today while browsing the tags I came across some very short and very angry text posts. Stating that some Johnlockers are not going to be fooled again, that they won’t watch Good Omens, because it all sounds too familiar and not in a good way.

Let me tell you this show is nothing like Sherlock. Good Omens has healed my broken Sherlockian heart. Everything I could have wished for Sherlock and John to become true is right there. And more.

A forbidden love between two enemies that cannot be (or can it?). The longest and most delicious slow burn in human history, spanning over the course of 6000 years (and still one of them is not ready, ‘You go to fast for me, Crowley’). A desperate situation, ending in a breakup. All the angst when one of them thinks the other one is gone forever. A reunion (thank God one without any aggression, yeah Mofftiss, I’m looking at you, this is not dull at all!). And an ending where ‘A Nightingale Sang In Berkeley Square’ (a romantic love song in case you hadn’t guessed).

What we don’t get is the constant denial of being in a relationship with each other from either of the two protagonists. And believe me, over the course of six hours of screen time this is often enough heavily implied or openly stated by supporting characters. What we also don’t get is some female love interest. Not once in 6000 years. Alright, Crowley once threatens that he has plenty of other people to fraternise with. This is a classic rom com move and of course they do have to play the jealousy angle, it’s just too delicious. No, but seriously. Humans are nothing to be interested in. Our angel and demon have only eyes for one another.

‘But they haven’t kissed. We are once again denied The Kiss. A Kiss is the only proof.’

Let me tell you that actually no. It’s not. This show is the living, breathing example that this thesis is wrong. Any Anathema/Newt shippers around? No? And why is that? We get some proper heterosexual fornication here, and guess what? It leaves everyone and their dog stone cold. (Or worse, bored or slightly embarrassed). This is because sex doesn’t do shit for your heart! The central couple in this story are two queer celestial beings with whom you suffer and rejoice from their first line to the last look they share. And by the way who is to say that they didn’t do ... whatever it is celestial beings do to show their affection? At least in this show we might not get a kiss, but we get another bench scene and in this one our couple is holding hands. Holding hands to swap bodies. Swap bodies which is quite an intimate trope per se, but on top of that with the intent to save each other’s lives (thank you so much team locations for the park bench scenes, they alone helped me get over the god awful scene between John and Sherlock where there’s only pain and pining that never gets resolved).

That’s what we get from the show itself. Now let’s have a look at their respective creators, shall we?

[x] [x] [x]

We have the creators continually expressing their firm belief that these characters are in love.

Then there are the actors. No denial. They talk openly about this romance in interviews. Michael Sheen especially can’t shut up about it. Even when he’s not asked. Well, what can you expect from a man who has been a fan of the book since 1990 and who openly admits in print media that he has “turned to the large body of fanfic“ in order to prepare for his role?

[x]

Compare that to Martin Freeman and Benedict Cumberbatch who scoff and sneer at Johnlockers and blatantly deny any relationship between their characters short of best buddies.

And then there’s @neil-gaiman himself. Adapting his own novel with the intention to stay as close to the source material as possible. He repeatedly stated he wanted as little overall changes as possible to honour his co-author the late Terry Pratchett whose dying wish was to make this story come alive on screen. An author who takes his time to patiently answer every ask on his twitter account or his tumblr blog, and of course there have been shippers asking these questions. Here are Neil Gaiman’s answers: every reading is valid, every interpretation is welcome.

In a blog post he wrote: “Terry Pratchett and I were talking about Crowley and Aziraphale over dinner the other night and wondering what they'd been up to ("...on the South Downs? You really think so?").”

Asked about that quote in a q&a in 2005 his reply was: "Well, what they're doing on the South Downs is sharing a cottage.  Next question?"

[x] [x]

Now go and compare this to Moffatt’s and Gatiss’ Cambridge q&a shortly after s4 had aired and everyone was still raw with disappointment. When asked if fans could possibly interpret one of the last scenes of ‘The Final Problem’ as Sherlock and John again living together in 221b, they flat out refused to even acknowledge the possibility. What little grace it’d have cost them to allow their loyal fans to build whatever head canon they wanted? Yet the all knowing author gods (who weren’t even adapting their own creation like Mr. Gaiman, but only writing big budged fan fiction for Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes stories themselves) had to pry this last wilted straw from the hands of the Johnlock community. ‘We imagine John still living at his old flat, occasionally coming over to help Sherlock solve his crimes...’ (and no, if anybody asks if I wouldn’t please give a source for that, I would rather not. I’m getting nauseous only thinking about it, and I won’t look back. You either take my word for it, or climb down into the vaults of my archive on @constancecream. It’s all been well documented.)

Sorry for sounding harsh. I apologise if I offended those in the Sherlock fandom who still enjoy the show, or worse, those who still have hope. It is just no longer for me.

After two years of bitterness, Good Omens has given me some sense of closure. I finally got confirmation that it is possible to tell a beautiful, romantic, queer love story while staying faithful to its source material. The creators have elegantly managed to give their audience the best of entertainment without alienating their fandom.

Go and read the book. Look and see for yourselves what’s on the page, what’s implied between the lines. Good Omens is brilliantly funny and a delight to read. See for yourselves if you pick up on any Crowley/Aziraphale vibes.

If yes, then go and watch the show. I promise it won’t disappoint you.

[leemaht]

endings and beginnings

crowley x aziraphale

so this is mostly based on the original storyline but i changed it at some point to fit it in the form of a fanfiction. i make the characters appear out of character so be warned.

warnings: i used some bad words.

english is not my first language so please excuse some grammatical mistakes and maybe some spelling and other minor stuff.

aziraphale and crowley were like day and night. like light and shadow. like heaven and hell. well they actually were in a way. aziraphale was an angel. sent from heaven to do good and only good, bring happyness to everyone he crossed ways with and to fulfill the great and ineffable plan. while crowley came from hell to bring earth and everything on it nothing but hate and misfortune. oddly enough that the both of them had developed a friendship. a strong and dependable one as well, the 6000 years they had spent together leaving its marks. living through good and bad times, seeing humanity destroy and rebuild itself and in any kind even helping with that had made them understand the situation and feelings of each other. they had analysed the personality of each others character often enough.  

aziraphale only ever had good in mind. crowley knew the kind of soul he had since their first encounter in the garden, when he had given away his flaming sword to protect abandoned humans without hesitation while he only was abled to make sarcastic comments. and when he had covered crowley with his wings to protect him from the for him deathly rain. any other angel would have just left him not caring what it would do to him, only thinking of gabriel. archangel fucking gabriel. he without question would have left him and laughed at him. but not aziraphale.

crowley was a lost soul. he did his best being a demon even if others would just shake their heads at his actions and reconsider this as consequences of staying on earth for too long. and they did shake their heads as far as they could without breaking them off.

'all of them are too old fashioned.' he thought to himself when he told them he had messed with the telephone network and they had looked at him questioning. he didn't know if they wondered what bad that would do or if they even knew what telephones were. that was on the day of the beginning of the end. when they had brought the antichrist into the game planning to destroy life itself at its roots.

11 years later

the armageddon had started. both the angel and the demon had watched it happen. they were currently in crowley's bentley 'phoning' hell after aziraphale had shown the children some terrible magic tricks. strangely there had been no hell hound. if there was one it would have been impossible to miss. but no sign anywhere. aziraphale sat there looking at crowley who did the talking. after he was finished it fell like a veil that covered both their visions for too long.

'no dog'

'no dog'

'wrong boy'

'wrong boy' they said in agreement. aziraphale more in trance then anything else.

crowley looked over to aziraphale who was most definitely in shock. he could read it in his eyes and his mouth and his face in general. that and his disappointment. not disappointment in the situation but in himself. the utter belief of failure in himself was written all over his face. crowley had the same feelings inside him but kept them hidden knowing he had a reputation to keep. he knew he had failed his task. his pact with his one and only friend. the only person (or not) he had on this and any other world. seeing this person collapse from the inside right beside him broke his heart which he suspected to be inside him somewhere nevertheless. but he couldn't help him. damn he couldn't even help himself. crowley was not able to undo the last 11 years with a snap of his fingers but he certainly wished he could. he put a hand on aziraphale's shoulder patting him and half smiled awkwardly.

'we will find the right kid. we will just start over again you'll see everything is going to be alright-' he started but was interrupted by aziraphale apruptly.

'alright! alright? crowley you have no idea what you are talking about! we just wasted 11 years which should have been used to save the world!' he cried. 'we should have saved the world and stopped this from happening and what have we done? we dressed up and played nanny for this spoiled brat! what do you think crowley! we can't overdo the work of 11 goddamn years in one single day!' he had started shouting by then and slapped crowley's hand from his shoulder. crowley looked at him in shock he had never seen him that indignant before and he certainly hadn't planned to. it was a heart-crushing view seeing his façade crumble like that.

'zira. calm down.... please.' he tried to calm him down subdued.

'no crowley. it's too late. we messed up. you messed up.' and with this last words he teleported out of sight leaving a broken crowley behind. all his worst nightmares had come true.

next thing crowley knew was him and the children standing at the airbase on the one side and garbiel, beelzebub and !aziraphale! on the other. he had found adam. not for the sake of the world. not even for his own sake but for aziraphale who now looked at him in inner conflict.

he was relieved to see crowley and that he had found the antichrist on his own, felt guilty for his outburst and for which side he stood on now but he couldn't just go over to him now. he just could not.

gabriel was having one of his speeches while aziraphale stood behind him silently looking over to crowley apologetic who had noticed his stare.

after that everything escalated. beelzebub and gabriel fought against crowley and the children, which were taken down fast as well as beelzebub. aziraphale didn't dare to move. gabriel was the last one standing leaning over crowley spitting in his face.

'know your place you pitiful demon.' he sad with a triumphal look on his face. crowley was just scared. truly scared of what would happen next. of what the angel would do to him. but before he could even elaborate further he heard a loud sound followed by gabriel twisting his eyes and falling to his side. behind him stood aziraphale with a bat he had miracled himself. he looked at crowley with tears in his eyes and reached a hand down to him with he gratefully accepted. he could not help but laugh at how out of character that was for aziraphale.

'this is not over yet.' threatened gabriel as he got up and teleported away followed by beelzebub.

the children looked at both of them questioning.

'rest now. we will talk tomorrow.' aziraphale said sad smiling to what they nodded. so he ported them home as well.

crowley and aziraphale where the only ones left at the airbase.

'crowley... i am so sorry. so terribly sorry for what i said and what i did and what i not did. i should have been with you and stood by your side. what i did was unforgivable.' he said starting to cry again.

'i forgive you.' aziraphale looked at him in awe. 'isn't that what we do? we fight and than we forgive each other. that's what you did.'

aziraphale had no words. he cried even harder now but not out of sadness but in relief. crowley smiled at him softly as they made eyecontact. crowley's glasses had been destroyed in the fight.

no one knows who leaned in but one of them did. most definitely both of them did. they closed their eyes. first aziraphale, after him crowley and their lips met halfway both of them smiling in the soft but passionate kiss they shared. aziraphale had to stand on his tippy toes as crowley's hands wandered to his waist. they both melted into the kiss and crowley felt his heartbeat fasten even more as aziraphale tangled his hair in his tender fingers. the kiss lasted forever since neither of them had the need to breathe. as they finally parted, aziraphale's hands still in crowley's hair and crowley's hands still on aziraphale's waist and made eyecontact once again both of them realised what they had missed all the time and would never give away again.