#to master

[cauterisen]

something something kimiko loving potions and magical items because they're equalizers

[theslaveramblings]

I wouldn’t mind if you were a bit more patronizing to me... But i know i exist to serve you however you see fit and don’t want to ask for too much.

[letsspeakout]

Dear Master,

Thank you, next.

It’s high time I said it.

[spontaneamenteanacor]

One Art

The art of losing isn’t hard to master; so many things seem filled with the intent to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.The art of losing isn’t hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:places, and names, and where it was you meant to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother’s watch. And look! My last, or next-to-last, of three loved houses went.The art of losing isn’t hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster, some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.I miss them, but it wasn’t a disaster.

—Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture I love) I shan’t have lied. It’s evident the art of losing’s not too hard to master though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

Elizabeth Bishop

[letsspeakout]

Dear Master,

You know, I never got to tell you about the nightmare that involved you. Somehow, I reckon things would’ve turned rather different if I did. But then, you blocked me before I had a chance to do so.

Why do people push others away without a chance to explain themselves? Assumptions can be good if well thought, but it’s hardly ever correct. Ugh, this is exactly why I wish the “Leave a Message!” function applied not only to phone calls but everything else in life.

Anyways, the nightmare-

I saw myself last night, deteriorating, dying. I was crying, screaming out apologies, to you. You were there, but never in reaching distance, perhaps too far to hear my cries.

You were literally keeping your distance.

Respect isn’t that great if it ends up hurting others. Don’t worry about me, we both know I’m expendable. Just don’t do it to the others. And… bros before hos. People always say that, but half the time, they don’t do it.

Your words must have hit me harder than I thought, for it to worm its way through my collection of nightmares.

I kinda ran to the bathroom mirror after that, as soon as I woke up, and I think I finally understood what you meant when you said crying was a possibility, had we met face-to-face. I thought I’d cry too, when I looked into the mirror.

I looked… worse than sad, worse than just dead. Like all the joy and life had been sucked out of me, like I needed a good cry. But I couldn’t let go, neither could I see the point. I don’t even have your tie with me anymore. The closest thing I had to you is now gone as well. So it’s worse now. I said I wanted to last till November, and I’ll try, but I don’t know if I can pick myself up after that, and it terrifies me.

I did alot for you, as you asked. You told me to try to stay as healthy as possible, if not for your sake, at least yours, But you’re not here anymore, in any sense, and I lost the reason, as well as the will.

I stopped trying.

I don’t know if I should apologize.

With love, but also pain.

[gyrrakavian]

To truly master something is to no longer be driven by desire for it.

Pink Mage, Trigger Star

[letsspeakout]

Dear Master,

This was one of the harder letters to write, I must admit.

How are you doing? Are you well? I’d ask you directly, but then, you’ve blocked me, out of respect for your girlfriend, I’m guessing. It was sad to not get any explanations, and suddenly find yourself with your closest person gone. I was sad and bitter for a while, but you wouldn’t do it unless you had a good reason, so I trust you for this to be not permanent.

I’ll miss you, and wait patiently till that day, I guess. It’s not like I have any other choice though.

I just wanted to tell you a few things, one of which I had a friend let you know, and I know for a fact that you received it. However, I think it’s worth repeating.

I’m sorry.

I don’t know what I did wrong, I haven’t the slightest idea, but I’m so sorry. It must have been quite something though, for you of all people to break all those promises. And that just makes me feel worse.

A part of me is hurting, because of the broken promises, and the other is… weighed down with guilt. I keep wondering you know, if I should’ve lied, after all. Pretended to be the person who you thought of me as. Pretended, and lied, “nothing’s wrong, I’m fine,” instead of honestly saying, “I’m not fine, please help me.” They say it takes a lot of courage to say help, but what’s the use if it makes your savior push you away?

I’m more or less the same, ever since the last time you asked. Just one new thing. Sometimes, my chest hurts, like my heart’s taking a stab. They say heart breaks are a phrase, but it makes me wonder so.

I want to hold on till November. And if when I do, I’ll find a way to ask you directly. To please talk to me again. To please make me laugh, once again. To please, let me smile from the bottom of the heart again, like you used to. That’s all I’m going to ask for.

You promised to be there for me, even if not literally. You promised to do what you can. And most importantly, you promised that those promises stand till the end. I can’t tell right now, but I’m going to hope those aren’t broken promises.

I hope for better days, when laughing is no longer a foreign concept.

I love you.